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1
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You should've seen me last night at O'Malley's
I sat there with the band !
2
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Okay, I didn't do anything
But I sat there !
3
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Gee, Berg, I'm sorry I missed it but...
4
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You know what ? It hit me the other day...
I'm actually here to get a degree !
5
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Hey! Come watch softball with me today
6
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Hey! I gotta go to class !
7
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Berg, we can't all be philosophy majors
8
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Look, it's not my fault a bunch of guys in sandals did my homework for me
9
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four thousand years ago
10
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That's mine
11
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Ehhh...
12
00:00:40,096 --> 00:00:42,565
So, what do you plan to do after grad school?
13
00:00:43,366 --> 00:00:44,868
Why can't you just let me be happy?
14
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Because it's not fair to the rest of us!
15
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I mean, you triple majored in undergrad and you never even opened up a book!
16
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That's...the wonder of me!
17
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No, that's not the wonder of you!
That's the trouble with you!
18
00:00:58,848 --> 00:01:03,153
See, you're always skating by...and someday -- SOMEDAY -- you're gonna hit a rough spot
19
00:01:03,219 --> 00:01:06,489
Who poured you a double mocha of grumpy this morning?
20
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I'm not grumpy... It's just...
21
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I spent all night on this, I've got a test in structures,
we have to be at work at three, and..
22
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I'm breaking up with Melissa today
23
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Oh, boy...
24
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we have to be at work at three?
25
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I'm breaking up with Melissa today?!
26
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One hole! C'mon!
Berg, I can't be late
27
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When Sharon stops down we'll make her give us a ride
28
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What makes you think she's gonna stop down?
29
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I stole her last roll of toilet paper
30
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Berg, I'm not in the mood...
31
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So what the hell's going on with you and Melissa, huh?
32
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I don't know
-- look, next week is our six-month anniversary and the lease is up on Hong Kong.
33
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- Huh?
- China's taking back the lease on Hong Kong
34
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Really?
I never knew the Chinese were leasing
35
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I mean, think about all those people, who worked so hard to make Hong Kong what it is, right?
For what?They have no future! It's just like Melissa and me
36
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I mean, if I was meant to spend my life with her, I'd be thinking about getting married by now!
Now, do you see me shopping for a ring? Nooooooo
37
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...thusly, we are living in Hong Kong, waiting for our lease to run out.
38
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Quit thinking so much! You like her, she adores you...screw the future
39
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One under!
40
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Look, look...Melissa's terrific. But she's just...she's not 'The One'
41
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8:45. All is clear
42
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8:45. All is clear
43
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Since when do you have asthma?
44
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Berg, you've gotta stop doing these experiments, you're gonna hurt yourself!
45
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It pays 50 bucks!
46
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But you don't have asthma!
47
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Don't need it! You know they always say not to exceed the recommended daily dosage?
48
00:02:55,064 --> 00:02:55,532
Yeah?
49
00:02:55,698 --> 00:03:00,437
Well, I'm the guy...who exceeds it so they know why you shouldn't!
50
00:03:01,604 --> 00:03:06,709
Well, I'm the guy who had to drive you to the hospital when that new foot spray made your toenails fall off!
51
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They grew back thicker!
52
00:03:10,513 --> 00:03:11,514
Berg, you just can't!
53
00:03:11,681 --> 00:03:13,783
You hate being single!
No, don't change the subject!
54
00:03:13,950 --> 00:03:16,986
Dating, getting used to someone, finding out their quirks..
55
00:03:18,421 --> 00:03:19,322
What's Melissa's?
56
00:03:19,354 --> 00:03:20,023
What?
57
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Quirk
58
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Nothing
59
00:03:29,299 --> 00:03:31,301
Peter, we don't play that
60
00:03:33,069 --> 00:03:34,237
All right, but you can't tell anyone
61
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Soon as you tell me, I'm chopping off my tongue
62
00:03:38,074 --> 00:03:38,975
- Melissa...
- Yeah.
63
00:03:39,109 --> 00:03:41,377
When we're...you know, going at it?
Yeah?
64
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She starts to laugh, but like...uncontrollably
65
00:03:46,883 --> 00:03:48,151
Sharon!.....
66
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You guys suck!
67
00:03:53,590 --> 00:03:54,958
So sex makes Melissa happy
68
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No, no, no, no, no...no...we are way past happy
This is psychotic. It's maniacal. It's like...
69
00:04:09,906 --> 00:04:11,441
THAT'S what that is?!
70
00:04:13,843 --> 00:04:16,246
Did you put the seat back up?
Why do we suck?
71
00:04:16,679 --> 00:04:21,151
Because,we all graduated together, yet I have to put on heels, which I hate;
72
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and go out into the real world and sell chemicals, which I hate;
while you two knuckleheads get to play golf...which I also hate
73
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Yeah, but you make like a bazillion dollars!
74
00:04:31,661 --> 00:04:39,536
Selling my soul! Look, if I close this deal today I make commission on 500 gallons of toxic cleaner I'm selling to some oil rig
75
00:04:39,869 --> 00:04:46,676
So...I can enjoy a weekend at the Cape, while killing off all sea life between here and Guam
--ugh, I hate myself!
76
00:04:46,943 --> 00:04:48,278
But you love your Beamer!
77
00:04:50,747 --> 00:04:53,483
Hey, why don't you drop me off when you take Pete to class?
78
00:04:53,650 --> 00:04:55,085
What, I'm taking Pete to class??
79
00:04:55,218 --> 00:04:57,087
That's perfect! Let's us be off, huh?
80
00:04:58,054 --> 00:05:00,356
- Pete's breaking up with Melissa today.
- Good!
81
00:05:00,590 --> 00:05:02,525
- Good? You said liked her?!
- Lied!
82
00:05:26,988 --> 00:05:30,392
- So?
- So? How'd she take it?
83
00:05:31,193 --> 00:05:32,327
I'd say pretty well.
84
00:05:32,360 --> 00:05:32,761
You didn't do it
85
00:05:33,161 --> 00:05:36,965
No.....but I made a lunch date to do it here
86
00:05:38,066 --> 00:05:38,834
What are you doing?
87
00:05:39,468 --> 00:05:47,943
Oh,oh...I've got everything planned out. The blue cards, why it's best for her; the yellows, why we should stay friends; and the pinks...
88
00:05:48,310 --> 00:05:50,078
..things to say when she starts to cry.
89
00:05:52,647 --> 00:05:55,484
You know, this behavior reflects badly on both of us
90
00:05:57,619 --> 00:06:01,423
Hey, Bill, you know I'm thinking it might be time to spring for some new cushions!
91
00:06:01,556 --> 00:06:05,927
- Hmmm...good idea, and maybe some curtains, and a little paint job too
- There ya go!
92
00:06:06,027 --> 00:06:07,295
Yeah, maybe we should think up a new name,
93
00:06:07,562 --> 00:06:15,971
because I tell you what it won't be Beacon Street Pizza no more!
It won't be the same place my daddy built! Here build your own damn place!
94
00:06:17,739 --> 00:06:19,107
Good going Pete!
95
00:06:19,474 --> 00:06:19,875
I didn't even--
96
00:06:19,908 --> 00:06:21,943
Ahhh! What's with him?
97
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He breaking up with Melissa
98
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What does he want to do that for?
99
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He feels she's not 'The One'
100
00:06:27,749 --> 00:06:29,251
Tell him to shut up
101
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Hey Pete! I found you that article on Marlon Brando's trainer!
102
00:06:40,595 --> 00:06:45,100
Thanks, Mr. Bauer.Why is he always bringing me things?
103
00:06:45,901 --> 00:06:46,168
He loves you
104
00:06:47,002 --> 00:06:51,106
He's delusional! He constantly telling me stories about his life that I know are from movies!
105
00:06:51,406 --> 00:06:52,941
You don't *know* that
106
00:06:53,442 --> 00:06:57,012
Berg, there was no way he was one of the Apple Dumpling Gang
107
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Incoming...
108
00:07:00,015 --> 00:07:03,351
Aw, Melissa...she wore her hair down
109
00:07:03,985 --> 00:07:07,522
I just want you to know I support you a hundred percent. Bill, it's starting!
110
00:07:08,056 --> 00:07:14,863
Hey! Hey sweetie! Hey Bill! Hi Mr. Bauer! Berg
111
00:07:16,598 --> 00:07:18,733
My class made you cookies.
112
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Aww.....
113
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They shouldn't have
114
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They love you. 'Cause they know I love you
115
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Melissa, you know how the lease is running out on Hong Kong?
116
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Sure...
117
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Well --
118
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Although there is that stipulation that China has to ensure the preservation of Hong Kong's way of life both socially and economically for at least another 50 years.
119
00:07:50,298 --> 00:07:52,300
So...Hong Kong's still gonna be Hong Kong?
120
00:07:52,340 --> 00:07:56,171
- Yeah. Of course
- God, you're smart
121
00:07:57,172 --> 00:07:59,908
-What are these?
...Ooh! Sorry! Are you okay?
122
00:08:00,008 --> 00:08:01,476
Yeah, I was trying to hand them to you!
123
00:08:03,779 --> 00:08:06,148
Spilling the water? Bill, what do you make of that?
124
00:08:06,248 --> 00:08:07,682
Take him out, he's done
125
00:08:09,317 --> 00:08:14,923
Bill, I don't believe we've seen the last of this *feisty* young girl from Wisconsin!
126
00:08:16,725 --> 00:08:18,560
Don't talk into the food
127
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Very smooth
128
00:08:20,428 --> 00:08:22,130
Look, I can't do this with you guys leering!
129
00:08:23,265 --> 00:08:25,203
I always leer. She'd be suspicious if I weren't leering
130
00:08:26,236 --> 00:08:32,040
-- she'd be like, 'Why isn't Berg leering?" Berg Leering...isn't that a type of Merlot?
131
00:08:34,309 --> 00:08:39,214
Maybe it's a Cabernet... 3:10 -- starting to babble
132
00:08:41,783 --> 00:08:45,120
Uh, Pete -- you'd better get back in there before Bauer steals your woman
133
00:08:47,556 --> 00:08:50,659
I thought I told you no more experiments. They interfere with your work
134
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This is harmless !
135
00:08:52,461 --> 00:08:54,930
Yeah, that's what you said when you couldn't get your sweat glands to stop
136
00:08:57,566 --> 00:08:59,000
I had to follow you around with a mop!
137
00:09:00,936 --> 00:09:07,509
The shark's coming right at me. And...I only have one bullet left. I think, 'Ohh, I'm a goner
138
00:09:09,177 --> 00:09:12,647
Then I see the oxygen tank in its mouth -- what do you think I do?
139
00:09:12,714 --> 00:09:13,915
You shot the tank and the shark blew up!
140
00:09:14,182 --> 00:09:15,217
I shot the tank!
141
00:09:17,586 --> 00:09:18,320
And the shark blew up!
142
00:09:20,088 --> 00:09:21,957
You're a brave man, Mr. Bauer
143
00:09:22,257 --> 00:09:26,493
And then, you and Richard Dreyfuss swam back to shore. Thanks a lot, Mr. Bauer
144
00:09:26,895 --> 00:09:28,263
Oh, that was a hell of a day!
145
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You are a lucky guy
146
00:09:34,402 --> 00:09:35,003
Yeah...
147
00:09:42,577 --> 00:09:45,580
What is with you today? Is there something you want to tell me?
148
00:09:45,614 --> 00:09:45,847
No...
149
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Are you trying to break up with me?
150
00:09:48,850 --> 00:09:52,154
NO! Not at all! Why, are we having problems?
151
00:09:52,621 --> 00:09:53,588
No, you're just acting weird
152
00:09:54,356 --> 00:09:55,957
Hey Berg, what have you done to him?
153
00:09:56,024 --> 00:09:59,027
Hey, this one isn't me, 'cause I'm the one who said he shouldn't break up with you!
154
00:09:59,094 --> 00:09:59,761
NO!!..
155
00:10:02,497 --> 00:10:04,533
- I don't believe you!
- No, I wasn't! He's evil!
156
00:10:04,833 --> 00:10:11,372
He may be evil, but at least he's honest!.. This is so... uh!.. Move! You're just so screwed up...
157
00:10:12,140 --> 00:10:16,111
You know, I don't want to hear it. The hell with you, life's short, Pete. See ya around
158
00:10:16,211 --> 00:10:16,745
Melissa --
159
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Ten years from now
-- when you're fat, and alone, and you have to wear a baseball cap at Club Med to hide your hair transplants; remember
160
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-- you had a good thing here and you blew it
161
00:10:32,727 --> 00:10:36,231
I don't believe it! She broke up with me! I just got dumped
162
00:10:36,565 --> 00:10:38,100
Boy, did you ever!
163
00:10:39,167 --> 00:10:41,303
And in front of everybody, too!
164
00:10:49,466 --> 00:10:50,600
So, did you get the account?
165
00:10:51,301 --> 00:10:55,605
Yep. One more client for me, one less species of bird
166
00:10:58,175 --> 00:11:00,644
Sharon, if you don't like it, quit
167
00:11:00,877 --> 00:11:03,280
Life's a waste unless you're doing what you love
168
00:11:04,214 --> 00:11:07,484
You're right. I mean, I can do anything I want! I'm smart!
169
00:11:07,551 --> 00:11:08,352
Absolutely right
170
00:11:08,719 --> 00:11:10,253
- I'm motivated!
- Yes, you are.
171
00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:10,954
I'm a people person!
172
00:11:11,054 --> 00:11:13,023
I gotta go back and count my pepperonis
173
00:11:14,191 --> 00:11:16,393
I am! Aren't I Berg?
174
00:11:17,327 --> 00:11:18,161
Sharon?...
175
00:11:19,162 --> 00:11:23,800
You're a lot of things, but people person? It's goes the Unabomber, then you.
176
00:11:25,369 --> 00:11:26,636
- Hey...
- No!
177
00:11:27,804 --> 00:11:29,106
That's why we love you
178
00:11:38,582 --> 00:11:39,549
- how was the delivery?
- Fine
179
00:11:41,718 --> 00:11:42,886
- Traffic?
- Not bad
180
00:11:44,187 --> 00:11:45,389
The toppings slide?
181
00:11:46,390 --> 00:11:47,324
Little bit
182
00:11:48,992 --> 00:11:52,462
Gees, you two fight like a couple of broads! Kick his ass, Pete!
183
00:11:53,730 --> 00:11:54,998
I can't...he's wearing my shirt
184
00:11:57,467 --> 00:11:58,702
I can't believe you're mad at me
185
00:11:59,603 --> 00:12:04,174
-- isn't that what you wanted? I mean, one minute you're gonna to break up with her, the next minute she breaks up with you
186
00:12:04,908 --> 00:12:06,643
And you flip out
187
00:12:08,078 --> 00:12:08,845
He has a point
188
00:12:08,879 --> 00:12:10,914
Berg, you should've just minded your own damn business
189
00:12:10,948 --> 00:12:12,282
Ah, he's gotcha there!
190
00:12:13,817 --> 00:12:16,019
I mean, when she walked out of here, I had an epiphany
191
00:12:16,987 --> 00:12:21,291
I mean, how many Melissas are there in the world?? What's wrong with me??
192
00:12:22,092 --> 00:12:28,832
I'll tell you what's wrong with you, okay?
You keep saying Melissa's not 'The One", when in reality you know she is 'The One', and you're scared to death of it
193
00:12:29,366 --> 00:12:30,867
Ding, ding, ding! Berg wins!
194
00:12:33,637 --> 00:12:34,404
All right...cover for me...
195
00:12:34,671 --> 00:12:35,472
Where are you going?
196
00:12:35,539 --> 00:12:38,842
Over to Melissa's to blame the whole thing on you
-- if there's anything she'll believe, it's that.
197
00:12:38,942 --> 00:12:39,976
Uh, no she won't
198
00:12:40,277 --> 00:12:40,544
Why not?
199
00:12:41,411 --> 00:12:44,314
Right now, if I'm little miss "Yippie, I get summers off!"
200
00:12:47,284 --> 00:12:56,526
I'm thinking...'maybe I over-reacted'. Then you come through the door blaming it all on Berg,
which says to me that you did in fact want to break up and you need your buddy to do it for you.
201
00:12:57,127 --> 00:13:00,430
Thank you so much. Thank you so much for destroying my future
202
00:13:03,867 --> 00:13:04,668
Future-killer!
203
00:13:08,038 --> 00:13:09,339
You know, I was in love once...
204
00:13:11,274 --> 00:13:21,545
...we shared a flat in France. Then the war came -- all hell broke loose...
...Somehow.. I found my self in Morocco running a night club.
205
00:13:23,186 --> 00:13:26,857
when she walked back into my life......but by then she was married
206
00:13:27,591 --> 00:13:30,494
Don't do what I did, son...don't let her get on that plane!!
207
00:13:35,232 --> 00:13:36,500
It's okay, Mr. Bauer
208
00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:38,335
you'll always have Paris
209
00:13:41,405 --> 00:13:43,006
Pete, delivery
210
00:13:43,707 --> 00:13:47,411
Let me take this one...I want to see if I can operate heavy machinery
211
00:13:48,412 --> 00:13:49,046
Fine
212
00:13:49,646 --> 00:13:52,816
I'll just assume the "Drive Safe" is implied
213
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Berg
214
00:14:05,028 --> 00:14:06,196
Thank you, I'd love to
215
00:14:08,765 --> 00:14:11,301
So, let me guess
he sent you to make up with me?
216
00:14:12,302 --> 00:14:13,570
He doesn't know I'm here...
217
00:14:14,404 --> 00:14:16,173
...ooh! Oranges!
218
00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:17,441
Why are you here?
219
00:14:18,141 --> 00:14:21,478
Look, Mel...I'm no expert on relationships --
220
00:14:21,712 --> 00:14:22,512
This just in
221
00:14:23,747 --> 00:14:27,617
But I am an expert on Pete. Okay? And sometimes, he just gets a little confused, is all.
222
00:14:28,051 --> 00:14:32,119
-Give the guy a break -- I mean, I'm the one who blew it
-Look.. Admit it... You're just here to make yourself feel better, Berg.
223
00:14:32,519 --> 00:14:35,759
-That's right! I feel better when you guys are together
-Give me a break, Berg!
224
00:14:36,259 --> 00:14:38,362
I do! It makes my best friend happy
225
00:14:40,330 --> 00:14:44,468
Look...you know like in tag -- where's that place where you're safe, where they can't get you?
226
00:14:45,535 --> 00:14:48,472
- Home base?
- Home base. Pete is my home base
227
00:14:49,139 --> 00:14:52,442
I mean, I wouldn't get to be me, if he wasn't him
228
00:14:56,980 --> 00:14:59,282
And someday, I hope I'll find someone like you
229
00:14:59,750 --> 00:15:00,550
And when I blow it...
230
00:15:02,085 --> 00:15:03,153
which I will...
231
00:15:04,454 --> 00:15:07,991
I know he'll go over and make her realize that there's something here worth saving
232
00:15:08,992 --> 00:15:12,529
Wow...I've never known you to be so open
233
00:15:13,263 --> 00:15:13,764
Me neither...
234
00:15:16,833 --> 00:15:18,335
- oh, God...
- What?
235
00:15:21,338 --> 00:15:28,679
7:48 -- having used...800 times the normal recommended daily dosage
236
00:15:28,979 --> 00:15:33,684
Now experiencing a side effect, feeling extremely honest and uh, forthright
237
00:15:36,953 --> 00:15:38,955
I've never been more afraid in my life
238
00:15:40,223 --> 00:15:42,059
Berg, this has sodium penathate in it
239
00:15:42,826 --> 00:15:46,596
- Truth serum
- So...you have to tell the truth?
240
00:15:46,930 --> 00:15:48,699
Noo....yeah. Wooo!
241
00:15:49,299 --> 00:15:49,933
Ha!!!
242
00:15:50,567 --> 00:15:52,736
Last Wednesday, when Pete was supposed to take me to the gallery opening?
243
00:15:53,370 --> 00:15:53,737
I've gotta go
244
00:15:53,970 --> 00:15:57,441
And he called me and told me that you had an allergic reaction to shellfish and had to rushed to the hospital?
245
00:15:58,141 --> 00:15:59,443
We were at the dog track
246
00:16:00,043 --> 00:16:04,448
And last week, when he couldn't make it to my cousin's engagement party
because you guys were collecting toys for the orphanage?
247
00:16:04,648 --> 00:16:07,517
- We were playing Pop-n-Shot at O'Malley's
- I knew it!
248
00:16:08,285 --> 00:16:12,422
You have to understand -- it was for the World Championship of all ...time!
249
00:16:14,958 --> 00:16:15,625
Hm, hm, hm...
250
00:16:18,161 --> 00:16:19,029
What does he tell you about me ?
251
00:16:19,029 --> 00:16:21,231
- Everything
-Like what, everything?
252
00:16:22,165 --> 00:16:25,268
Like the first time he saw you, he said he actually felt his heart stop
253
00:16:26,503 --> 00:16:27,104
Really?
254
00:16:28,705 --> 00:16:33,343
And you...do a phenomenal Linda Rondstat imitation
255
00:16:34,611 --> 00:16:35,245
Aww...Pete!
256
00:16:38,548 --> 00:16:39,750
And he hates sushi...
257
00:16:41,184 --> 00:16:43,286
...but goes with you all the time because he knows you love it
258
00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:45,756
Why didn't he say anything?!
259
00:16:47,691 --> 00:16:50,193
And you laugh like a mad scientist during sex!
260
00:16:59,002 --> 00:17:00,537
I did a bad thing...
261
00:17:01,538 --> 00:17:03,607
Who, Berg...who did you do a bad thing to?
262
00:17:07,978 --> 00:17:09,046
Yes!...
263
00:17:09,146 --> 00:17:11,248
God, Berg, what more could you have done to me today?!
264
00:17:12,916 --> 00:17:15,652
Please, do not tell me you went over to Melissa's...
265
00:17:16,553 --> 00:17:17,521
Aw, Berg!
266
00:17:18,055 --> 00:17:21,825
I didn't want you blaming me for screwing up the rest of your life, so I went over there to get your guys back together!
267
00:17:22,092 --> 00:17:24,995
And?!
And she *never* wants to speak you again!
268
00:17:28,832 --> 00:17:31,134
- Berg, what did you tell her?
- Everything
269
00:17:31,968 --> 00:17:36,306
It wasn't me -- it was the asthma inhaler. It had side effects
it's like a truth serum
270
00:17:36,440 --> 00:17:37,841
Berg, what did you tell her?!
271
00:17:38,375 --> 00:17:41,912
I...I told where you really were last Saturday
272
00:17:41,978 --> 00:17:44,581
Oh, God...
I told her about the laughing...
273
00:17:44,881 --> 00:17:45,549
You WHAT?!
274
00:17:46,049 --> 00:17:47,217
You know, when you guys have sex?
275
00:17:48,752 --> 00:17:50,721
She laughs like a crazy lady in an attic
276
00:17:51,154 --> 00:17:53,056
God, so THAT'S what that is!
277
00:17:56,426 --> 00:18:00,163
- Do you still have to tell the truth?
- I'm not sure. Ask me if I like your hair this way
278
00:18:00,964 --> 00:18:05,402
- Do you like my hair this way?
- Yes. Very much.... It wore off
279
00:18:07,003 --> 00:18:10,707
Berg, my life is not one of your experiments -- just leave it alone!
280
00:18:14,544 --> 00:18:19,950
- You know, I'm starting to feel *way* underappreciated here
- Go!
281
00:18:20,584 --> 00:18:21,151
Cover for me
282
00:18:21,885 --> 00:18:26,189
- Yeah, there's about as much chance of me wearing this thing as - -
- Ah-ah-ah, hey! People person!
283
00:18:27,190 --> 00:18:31,528
- Excuse me -- can I see a menu?
- It's a pizza place!
284
00:18:33,063 --> 00:18:35,866
What are you doing out here? Did you come to push me into traffic?
285
00:18:38,135 --> 00:18:41,438
- I don't like you being mad at me
- I'm not mad at you, I'm mad at me
286
00:18:42,239 --> 00:18:47,244
Berg, I'm gonna be 25 and I don't even know where my life is
-- and the one good thing I had, I messed up!
287
00:18:48,278 --> 00:18:55,185
When my dad was my age, he had a house, he had a wife, he had me! I mean, what do I have?
288
00:18:56,019 --> 00:18:58,989
You have the ability to suck the life out of an evening!
289
00:19:02,893 --> 00:19:07,698
There's no...there's no blueprint for life! Okay, first it's meiosis
-- out of the womb, snip
290
00:19:08,231 --> 00:19:14,871
Then you get a big ol' aneurysm and you slump over your desk
Okay, everything in between just happens, Pete....enjoy it
291
00:19:16,673 --> 00:19:21,178
Berg, I'm not like you, all right?
I don't find pearls when I eat oysters
292
00:19:21,511 --> 00:19:26,817
I can't learn Russian in three days from a book called 'How To Learn Russian In Three Days"
293
00:19:27,818 --> 00:19:29,086
I wish I could, but I can't
294
00:19:29,453 --> 00:19:30,654
That's why you have me
295
00:19:31,121 --> 00:19:35,058
- Are you gonna have my children?
- There *is* an experiment at MIT next week
296
00:19:45,335 --> 00:19:46,670
What if I wind up alone?
297
00:19:47,371 --> 00:19:55,479
What if I wind up alone, hanging out in some pizza place,
telling anyone who will listen to me about the time I plowed under my cornfield and built a baseball diamond?
298
00:19:57,014 --> 00:19:58,615
Listen to me, okay?
299
00:19:59,249 --> 00:20:02,919
Everything's gonna work out, all right?...you'll have the wife and the kids
it's there
300
00:20:04,054 --> 00:20:05,756
You just can't see around that turn yet
301
00:20:06,223 --> 00:20:07,290
How can you be so sure?
302
00:20:08,058 --> 00:20:09,893
'Cause I know. It has to
303
00:20:10,660 --> 00:20:13,597
'Cause If my life doesn't work out I'm coming to live with you
304
00:20:15,632 --> 00:20:16,400
You heard me
305
00:20:17,901 --> 00:20:18,268
Fine!
306
00:20:27,744 --> 00:20:29,913
Berg, what do you think is gonna happen to Sharon?
307
00:20:30,247 --> 00:20:31,615
I'm sure she'll settle down, have kids...
308
00:20:32,816 --> 00:20:34,284
Get your butts back in here!
309
00:20:34,759 --> 00:20:36,386
Or take over Cuba
310
00:20:41,825 --> 00:20:43,026
I didn't even get a tip!
311
00:20:45,128 --> 00:20:48,065
You told a customer to shut up or you'd bash his head in with a shovel!
312
00:20:49,566 --> 00:20:51,668
Well, he kept *waving* at me!
313
00:20:53,904 --> 00:20:56,306
Oh, how long does it take to make up with somebody?
314
00:20:57,074 --> 00:20:58,041
Relax...
315
00:20:59,876 --> 00:21:00,711
Hey, hey!
316
00:21:02,112 --> 00:21:05,549
- So how'd it go?
- Eh, go figure -- Melissa and I are going to try and work things out
317
00:21:06,083 --> 00:21:07,918
Great! I've always liked her
318
00:21:12,189 --> 00:21:15,325
C'mon --I think what we need here is some Pop-n-Shot at O'Malley's
319
00:21:16,259 --> 00:21:17,561
- Oh, no, I can't
- Sharon's buying
320
00:21:18,028 --> 00:21:19,629
'Cause I'm a people person!
321
00:21:21,031 --> 00:21:24,167
I told Melissa I'd go back over with a video
322
00:21:24,968 --> 00:21:25,869
- Go back over?
- Mmm-hmmm
323
00:21:27,704 --> 00:21:29,873
Not in your condition
Look at him
324
00:21:30,207 --> 00:21:33,410
-Oooh... all clammy and yellow...
- No, guys..
325
00:21:33,447 --> 00:21:36,647
Food poisoning! Hits you like that!
326
00:21:36,813 --> 00:21:38,648
-Guys...
- We'll call from the bar
28209
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