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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
2
00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:51,167
Los Angeles Tower,
this is Transworld 22 Heavy.
3
00:00:51,292 --> 00:00:54,833
We are going down!
Repeat, engines two and...
4
00:00:54,917 --> 00:00:56,917
L.A. Tower, this is...
5
00:00:57,042 --> 00:00:59,125
Mayday! Mayday!
6
00:00:59,208 --> 00:01:01,333
22 Heavy, pull up! Pull up!
7
00:02:04,292 --> 00:02:08,333
Andrew,
this is your father.
8
00:02:08,417 --> 00:02:10,375
Hello?
9
00:02:12,042 --> 00:02:16,042
Look, you don't call me back,
so I don't know how to do this.
10
00:02:18,417 --> 00:02:20,333
If you're not gonna
return my calls...
11
00:02:20,417 --> 00:02:23,167
then there's no way
for us to communicate...
12
00:02:25,250 --> 00:02:27,333
Look, I don't know
how to do this...
13
00:02:27,458 --> 00:02:30,375
but you're gonna need
to come home now.
14
00:02:30,500 --> 00:02:33,167
Last night...
15
00:02:33,250 --> 00:02:35,167
Your mother died
last night, Andrew.
16
00:02:35,250 --> 00:02:37,833
She drowned.
17
00:02:39,125 --> 00:02:41,375
Last night,
she drowned in the bath.
18
00:03:41,750 --> 00:03:43,709
Ten r๏ฟฝsum๏ฟฝs just today.
19
00:03:43,792 --> 00:03:46,500
They come in every day
from Idaho or Milwaukee or Florida.
20
00:03:46,625 --> 00:03:50,250
And you know what they want even more than
a guest spot on Everybody Loves Raymond?
21
00:03:50,375 --> 00:03:53,417
They want your job. This cannot happen again.
This will never happen again.
22
00:03:53,542 --> 00:03:55,667
You have two tables.
You are 30 minutes late.
23
00:03:55,750 --> 00:03:58,334
And if I ever say this again,
your job will go to...
24
00:03:58,459 --> 00:04:00,834
Todd Slauson
from Duluth, Minnesota.
25
00:04:08,834 --> 00:04:11,000
Sparkling or flat?
26
00:04:11,125 --> 00:04:13,667
Waiter 10,
do you have your earpiece in?
27
00:04:13,792 --> 00:04:16,792
You forget the order 41
for Table 101.
28
00:04:16,875 --> 00:04:19,167
What the fuck, man?
What, are you on break?
29
00:04:19,250 --> 00:04:21,125
Nah, I'm just
messin'with you.
30
00:04:21,209 --> 00:04:24,834
Uh, we'll have four
Ketel Red Bulls and...
31
00:04:24,959 --> 00:04:28,542
And I'll have a Ketel cosmo
with a Red Bull and some bread ASAP.
32
00:04:29,667 --> 00:04:31,625
We don't have bread.
33
00:04:31,709 --> 00:04:34,334
What do you mean?
How can you not have bread?
34
00:04:34,459 --> 00:04:38,000
Uh, we're a Vietnamese restaurant.
We just don't have bread.
35
00:04:38,084 --> 00:04:40,125
But you're
not Vietnamese.
36
00:04:40,209 --> 00:04:43,042
No, I'm not.
37
00:04:44,542 --> 00:04:47,875
Can I have something to chew on?
Fuck. Bamboo, whatever.
38
00:04:47,959 --> 00:04:50,000
I'll see what I can find.
39
00:04:52,917 --> 00:04:55,167
Waiter number 12...
40
00:04:55,250 --> 00:04:57,625
Flight Number 121
with nonstop service...
41
00:04:57,709 --> 00:05:00,834
to Newark International
will be departing from Gate 32.
42
00:05:19,542 --> 00:05:25,500
#Thanks for the time
that you've given me #
43
00:05:25,584 --> 00:05:31,542
#The memories are all
in my mind #
44
00:05:31,625 --> 00:05:34,417
#And now that
we've come #
45
00:05:34,542 --> 00:05:38,292
#To the end
of our rainbow #
46
00:05:38,375 --> 00:05:44,334
#There's something
I must say out loud #
47
00:05:44,417 --> 00:05:48,375
#Yes, you're once, twice #
48
00:05:48,500 --> 00:05:52,375
#Three times a lady #
49
00:05:52,459 --> 00:05:57,667
- #I love you
50
00:05:57,750 --> 00:06:00,875
#Yes, you're once, twice #
51
00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:02,000
#Three times a lady #
52
00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:05,542
#Three times a lady #
53
00:06:05,667 --> 00:06:10,209
#I love you
54
00:06:10,334 --> 00:06:15,625
#I love you
55
00:06:22,459 --> 00:06:25,167
Shit, yo.
56
00:06:25,292 --> 00:06:27,209
Holy shit.
57
00:06:27,292 --> 00:06:29,625
What's up, man?
58
00:06:29,709 --> 00:06:31,625
Largeman, what are you
doing here?
59
00:06:31,709 --> 00:06:35,042
Uh, that's my mom.
60
00:06:35,167 --> 00:06:38,042
- Fuck.
- Oh, fuck.
61
00:06:38,167 --> 00:06:40,042
Sorry.
62
00:06:40,167 --> 00:06:42,500
Yeah.
63
00:06:42,584 --> 00:06:46,000
So, welcome back home.
64
00:06:46,084 --> 00:06:47,834
Thanks.
65
00:06:47,917 --> 00:06:50,250
So what have you
been doing?
66
00:06:50,375 --> 00:06:52,542
You still, uh,
acting and shit, right?
67
00:06:52,667 --> 00:06:55,000
- Yeah.
- l-In L.A., right?
68
00:06:55,084 --> 00:06:57,000
- Yeah.
- That's cool.
69
00:06:57,084 --> 00:06:59,000
I hear that place
is, like, fucking crazy.
70
00:06:59,084 --> 00:07:02,167
My cousin's a writer out there.
Says that place is mad crazy.
71
00:07:02,250 --> 00:07:05,334
He's, like, writing a movie
about snowboarders or some shit.
72
00:07:05,417 --> 00:07:07,375
I don't...
I don't know.
73
00:07:07,459 --> 00:07:10,542
Um, but I should
introduce you to him, Largeman.
74
00:07:10,667 --> 00:07:12,542
Maybe you two
could do something together.
75
00:07:12,667 --> 00:07:14,667
Yeah, definitely.
76
00:07:14,792 --> 00:07:17,209
What are you
doing tonight, man?
77
00:07:18,250 --> 00:07:21,084
Uh, nothing.
No real plans.
78
00:07:21,209 --> 00:07:23,459
I'm just in town
for a couple days, so...
79
00:07:23,542 --> 00:07:25,459
You should
come out with us.
80
00:07:27,042 --> 00:07:29,750
We're gonna go over the Gleasons' house.
They're having some...
81
00:07:29,875 --> 00:07:31,875
fucking huge party
or something.
82
00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:34,667
- Supposedly.
- Well, yeah. Supposedly.
83
00:07:34,750 --> 00:07:37,334
- Really?
- He lives up on the hill.
84
00:07:37,417 --> 00:07:39,625
We'll probably go over there
after we bury your mom.
85
00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:41,792
- Well, I got to shower.
- Same.
86
00:07:44,167 --> 00:07:47,542
Do you know your mother
redid the hallway bathroom?
87
00:07:48,709 --> 00:07:50,584
What?
I'm sorry. What?
88
00:07:50,709 --> 00:07:53,584
Since I met her,
she never showed an interest in anything.
89
00:07:53,709 --> 00:07:56,000
All of a sudden,
a month ago, she wakes up...
90
00:07:56,084 --> 00:07:58,584
she wants to redecorate
a bathroom.
91
00:07:58,709 --> 00:08:00,959
I helped her.
92
00:08:01,042 --> 00:08:04,334
- Oh, must have been fun.
- Well, I sew.
93
00:08:04,417 --> 00:08:06,334
I made you something.
94
00:08:06,417 --> 00:08:08,292
It's a shirt.
95
00:08:09,375 --> 00:08:11,875
That's... That's good.
Thank you.
96
00:08:13,709 --> 00:08:15,792
Will you try it on now?
97
00:08:17,417 --> 00:08:19,334
Now?
98
00:08:19,417 --> 00:08:22,042
In case I have to fix it
before you leave again...
99
00:08:22,167 --> 00:08:24,834
and we don't see you
for another nine years.
100
00:08:24,959 --> 00:08:26,875
I wanna make sure it fits.
101
00:08:26,959 --> 00:08:29,667
Oh. Okay.
102
00:08:29,750 --> 00:08:32,709
You're gonna
love the material.
103
00:08:32,792 --> 00:08:36,834
I used the leftovers from
your mother's design. Gorgeous.
104
00:08:53,417 --> 00:08:55,334
Hi.
105
00:08:58,042 --> 00:09:00,875
- Hello.
- How you doing?
106
00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:04,834
"Well, besides that,
Mrs. Lincoln, how was the show?"
107
00:09:04,917 --> 00:09:08,500
You know, I'm not really sure what
to say here, Dad, so I'm sorry.
108
00:09:08,625 --> 00:09:11,042
Mm.
109
00:09:11,125 --> 00:09:13,375
How are you?
110
00:09:15,209 --> 00:09:17,542
I'm okay.
111
00:09:17,625 --> 00:09:20,042
I've been getting these
really bad headaches though.
112
00:09:20,125 --> 00:09:22,834
Um, they're really quick.
113
00:09:22,917 --> 00:09:26,417
It's like a... just a little
lightning storm in my head.
114
00:09:26,542 --> 00:09:28,625
Just for a second,
and then it's gone.
115
00:09:28,709 --> 00:09:32,542
I just thought maybe you could help me
get that checked out while I'm home.
116
00:09:32,625 --> 00:09:34,834
Go see Dr. Cohen
first thing in the morning.
117
00:09:34,917 --> 00:09:37,292
He's a neurologist in my building.
l-I'll call him.
118
00:09:37,375 --> 00:09:40,167
He'll fit you in. I'm sure it's
nothing to worry about.
119
00:09:44,834 --> 00:09:46,709
Place looks good.
120
00:09:46,834 --> 00:09:50,500
Oh, that's nice. Yeah, we've been
doing a lot of work on it.
121
00:09:50,584 --> 00:09:52,625
Really?
122
00:09:55,209 --> 00:09:58,375
Actually, no.
I don't know why I just said that.
123
00:09:58,500 --> 00:10:01,000
Someone redid the, uh,
hallway bathroom. I saw that.
124
00:10:01,084 --> 00:10:03,375
Yeah. That's new.
125
00:10:08,292 --> 00:10:10,125
I'm glad you're here.
126
00:10:12,667 --> 00:10:15,084
Saying good-bye
is important.
127
00:10:18,542 --> 00:10:20,667
I'm glad you could
fit it in.
128
00:11:34,626 --> 00:11:36,834
- Put your hands on your head, please.
- What?
129
00:11:36,959 --> 00:11:41,834
I said put your motherfucking hands
on your head! Please.
130
00:11:41,917 --> 00:11:43,834
Eighty-two in a 25.
131
00:11:43,917 --> 00:11:46,376
What are you gonna tell me,
you're late or just tired?
132
00:11:46,501 --> 00:11:48,376
- I was...
- Shut the fuck up!
133
00:11:54,376 --> 00:11:56,376
- Largeman.
- Kenny?
134
00:11:56,501 --> 00:11:58,501
Holy shit!
135
00:11:58,626 --> 00:12:00,542
Oh, man.
How you doing?
136
00:12:00,626 --> 00:12:02,542
I'm... I'm great.
137
00:12:02,667 --> 00:12:05,042
- Your mom just died!
- I know.
138
00:12:05,167 --> 00:12:08,042
- I mean, that's why you're home.
- Yeah. Yup.
139
00:12:08,167 --> 00:12:10,334
You're a cop, Kenny?
140
00:12:10,459 --> 00:12:14,042
- Yeah, I know. I know.
- Why?
141
00:12:14,167 --> 00:12:17,209
I don't know. Couldn't think of
anything better to do.
142
00:12:17,334 --> 00:12:19,209
No, but it's really cool
though, man.
143
00:12:19,334 --> 00:12:21,626
People really
listen to you. I mean...
144
00:12:21,709 --> 00:12:23,626
they have to!
145
00:12:23,709 --> 00:12:26,626
- Yo, and check this shit out. That's the safety.
- Oh, cool.
146
00:12:26,709 --> 00:12:29,376
And plus, the benefits, man.
If I get shot, I'm like...
147
00:12:29,501 --> 00:12:31,376
rich!
148
00:12:31,501 --> 00:12:35,001
But, Kenny, the last time I saw you,
you were doing coke lines off a urinal.
149
00:12:35,126 --> 00:12:37,584
# La, la, la, la ##
No, I had to grow up, man.
150
00:12:37,709 --> 00:12:41,126
It's time to grow up. Plus, I wasn't
making shit in that fish market.
151
00:12:41,209 --> 00:12:43,584
No one knew who I was,
couldn't get laid.
152
00:12:43,709 --> 00:12:45,751
It's a much better
situation for me, man.
153
00:12:47,334 --> 00:12:51,501
Speaking of which,
um, how'd I do?
154
00:12:51,626 --> 00:12:53,292
What do you mean?
155
00:12:53,376 --> 00:12:55,501
I don't know.
You know, just the whole...
156
00:12:55,626 --> 00:12:57,834
You mean, like, as a cop?
157
00:12:57,959 --> 00:13:00,459
Yeah. The whole,
"Shut the fuck up!"
158
00:13:00,542 --> 00:13:03,792
Well, I thought you were a dick,
so I guess that's good.
159
00:13:03,876 --> 00:13:06,626
Nice. So,
what the fuck, man?
160
00:13:06,709 --> 00:13:09,542
You're this huge movie star now?
I heard you did some...
161
00:13:09,626 --> 00:13:11,667
you played a big football player
or something.
162
00:13:11,751 --> 00:13:13,876
- I didn't see it.
- It was just this thing...
163
00:13:14,001 --> 00:13:16,459
- Fucking De Niro and shit.
- What?
164
00:13:16,542 --> 00:13:18,459
- He's awesome.
- Yeah.
165
00:13:18,542 --> 00:13:20,459
- Deer Hunter?
- Yeah.
166
00:13:20,542 --> 00:13:23,042
Man, we should sit down
and we should talk...
167
00:13:23,167 --> 00:13:26,417
because I've got some
really good ideas for movies.
168
00:13:26,542 --> 00:13:28,917
You could play me
and shit. Poof!
169
00:13:29,042 --> 00:13:31,334
- Stories from the Force.
- Yeah.
170
00:13:31,417 --> 00:13:33,917
- Yeah, definitely. That sounds good.
171
00:13:56,834 --> 00:13:58,709
- Holy shit!
- What's up?
172
00:13:58,834 --> 00:14:00,709
- How you doing, man?
- How you doing, man?
173
00:14:00,834 --> 00:14:03,167
- What's up?
- Hey, how you doing? Good to see you.
174
00:14:03,251 --> 00:14:07,292
Get this guy a beer. This guy does not
wait for a beer. He's a movie star.
175
00:14:07,376 --> 00:14:09,501
Like, uh, Jersey's
De Niro and shit.
176
00:14:11,792 --> 00:14:15,209
- Largeman, man, what are you doing home?
- I, uh...
177
00:14:15,334 --> 00:14:17,626
Press junket.
178
00:14:17,709 --> 00:14:20,209
That's phat, yo.
Fuck, yeah!
179
00:14:20,334 --> 00:14:23,709
Serpico and shit.
"Attica!"
180
00:14:23,792 --> 00:14:26,709
Shut the fuck up, man.
181
00:14:28,376 --> 00:14:30,709
You like that?
182
00:14:30,834 --> 00:14:33,667
Like, uh,
"press junket"?
183
00:14:33,751 --> 00:14:36,542
That's improv, bitch.
You can use it. Right?
184
00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:38,542
Okay. Let me
show you something.
185
00:14:44,251 --> 00:14:47,209
Largeman! Oh, whoa!
What's going on, man?
186
00:14:48,709 --> 00:14:50,834
How you been?
Hey!
187
00:14:50,959 --> 00:14:53,542
- Jess. How are you, brother?
- How's it going, man?
188
00:14:53,667 --> 00:14:56,542
I haven't seen you in so long.
I heard you're kicking ass.
189
00:14:56,626 --> 00:15:00,126
Oh, um, basically the man
bought my silent Velcro patent.
190
00:15:00,209 --> 00:15:02,834
- What?
- I developed this little item.
191
00:15:02,917 --> 00:15:05,167
It's just like Velcro,
but it doesn't make that...
192
00:15:05,251 --> 00:15:07,834
the Velcro noise.
193
00:15:07,959 --> 00:15:10,709
- So how much did they buy it for?
- A lot, man.
194
00:15:10,834 --> 00:15:13,709
Wow. So wh-what are you
doing with yourself?
195
00:15:13,834 --> 00:15:15,792
Um, nothing.
Nothing.
196
00:15:15,876 --> 00:15:17,876
I've never been so bored
in my whole life.
197
00:15:17,959 --> 00:15:21,001
Yeah. First month I went out.
I bought a whole bunch of shit.
198
00:15:21,084 --> 00:15:23,001
But, y...
Nothing.
199
00:15:26,209 --> 00:15:28,792
Someone got
a joint for me?
200
00:15:58,251 --> 00:16:00,167
Here you go.
201
00:16:02,251 --> 00:16:04,834
Oh. No, thanks, man.
202
00:16:04,917 --> 00:16:08,417
Really? I thought you were
a big movie star and shit.
203
00:16:08,542 --> 00:16:10,876
- Nah.
- Well, then here.
204
00:16:10,959 --> 00:16:13,667
Eat this.
205
00:16:13,792 --> 00:16:16,001
Welcome home.
206
00:16:27,251 --> 00:16:29,501
- I guess I'll see you guys later.
207
00:16:31,292 --> 00:16:33,626
Should we
play a game?
208
00:16:33,709 --> 00:16:37,376
Let's play
"spin the bottle."
209
00:16:37,501 --> 00:16:41,001
I'm not playing "spin the bottle."
How old are we?
210
00:16:41,126 --> 00:16:43,959
- Or more importantly, how old are they?
- Oh, they're all legal.
211
00:16:44,042 --> 00:16:45,959
I think.
212
00:16:46,042 --> 00:16:48,334
Well, we just ate
all this fucking "X,"
213
00:16:48,417 --> 00:16:51,126
so what the hell else
are we supposed to do?
214
00:16:51,209 --> 00:16:53,626
Girl has a point.
215
00:16:53,709 --> 00:16:57,084
- Fucking right.
- I'm in!
216
00:18:02,459 --> 00:18:04,376
- Hey!
- Large!
217
00:18:07,251 --> 00:18:09,209
Large!
218
00:18:14,376 --> 00:18:17,876
- Largeman, this is Dana.
- Hi.
219
00:18:18,001 --> 00:18:20,668
Hi.
220
00:18:20,793 --> 00:18:23,001
- Who's up?
221
00:18:50,668 --> 00:18:52,626
Whoo!
222
00:18:59,626 --> 00:19:03,168
- This is gonna be a good night.
223
00:20:18,668 --> 00:20:20,543
It's good, isn't it?
224
00:20:24,376 --> 00:20:27,543
I always try to save a couple
of the marshmallows till the very end...
225
00:20:27,668 --> 00:20:29,626
but I never make it.
226
00:20:29,709 --> 00:20:31,626
I always end up with...
227
00:20:31,709 --> 00:20:34,043
a bunch of flake things
and pink milk.
228
00:20:35,668 --> 00:20:37,668
My mind wanders.
229
00:20:40,793 --> 00:20:42,709
So, Tim...
230
00:20:42,793 --> 00:20:46,168
How long have you been
working at Medieval Times?
231
00:20:46,251 --> 00:20:49,959
Three years. B-But I've
only been a knight for two.
232
00:20:50,043 --> 00:20:52,043
You have to
pay your dues.
233
00:20:52,126 --> 00:20:55,334
I worked in the stables
and helped in the kitchen.
234
00:20:55,459 --> 00:20:57,626
When I started,
he was making the coleslaw.
235
00:20:57,709 --> 00:21:00,001
It hasn't been the same
since you got knighted.
236
00:21:00,084 --> 00:21:02,001
But I really
just stirred it.
237
00:21:02,084 --> 00:21:04,084
Don't be modest.
238
00:21:04,209 --> 00:21:06,543
Mr. Modesty won
the joust last night.
239
00:21:06,626 --> 00:21:10,959
- Congratulations.
- It's not that big a deal. It's fixed.
240
00:21:11,043 --> 00:21:13,959
What was it that happened
to you in high school?
241
00:21:14,043 --> 00:21:15,959
You had a thing.
I forgot what it was.
242
00:21:16,043 --> 00:21:18,459
- He got the shit kicked out of him.
- No, he didn't.
243
00:21:18,543 --> 00:21:22,168
How do you know? He got the shit
kicked out of him by Tyrell Freedmen.
244
00:21:22,293 --> 00:21:25,043
- I fucked him up too.
- He knocked your teeth out.
245
00:21:25,168 --> 00:21:27,501
He only chipped one tooth.
246
00:21:29,751 --> 00:21:32,209
So, uh, w-what are you
up to now, Mark?
247
00:21:32,293 --> 00:21:34,209
You're digging graves?
248
00:21:38,793 --> 00:21:40,793
Mark's getting into
real estate.
249
00:21:45,959 --> 00:21:48,543
- Tim can speak Klingon.
- What?
250
00:21:48,668 --> 00:21:50,543
- No, I can't.
- Yes, you can.
251
00:21:50,626 --> 00:21:52,834
- What the fuck is Klingon?
- Like the Star Trek guys?
252
00:21:52,959 --> 00:21:55,543
- Yeah, he can speak their language.
- No, she's kidding.
253
00:21:55,668 --> 00:21:57,876
No, I'm not.
Why are you being shy?
254
00:21:58,001 --> 00:22:00,501
- Yeah, don't be shy, Tim.
- It's just... It's made-up.
255
00:22:00,584 --> 00:22:03,543
This guy who plays the wizard
at work is a Trekkie. I don't...
256
00:22:03,626 --> 00:22:06,793
- Don't be shy. Tell them
what you said to me last night.
- No.
257
00:22:06,876 --> 00:22:09,501
Say what you said
to her last night.
258
00:22:14,834 --> 00:22:16,501
You gotta be kidding me.
259
00:22:16,584 --> 00:22:19,543
It means, "I like to
mate after battle."
260
00:22:19,668 --> 00:22:21,668
- That's not what I said.
- Yeah.
261
00:22:21,751 --> 00:22:23,709
No. No. That wasn't
the one I said.
262
00:22:23,834 --> 00:22:25,751
This one means,
"Kill Kirk"...
263
00:22:25,876 --> 00:22:29,501
and also "Hallelujah,"
depending on the context.
264
00:22:29,584 --> 00:22:31,876
You must have got it
confused with, uh...
265
00:22:34,584 --> 00:22:38,168
- Honey, that is good.
- You know what that means, Tim?
266
00:22:38,293 --> 00:22:41,209
Well, I do. It means,
"Get the fuck out of my house...
267
00:22:41,293 --> 00:22:43,209
before I chop
your fucking head off."
268
00:22:51,251 --> 00:22:53,626
Mark, he's a knight.
269
00:22:53,709 --> 00:22:56,459
He's just a fast-food knight.
270
00:22:58,876 --> 00:23:00,793
I should get going.
271
00:23:12,501 --> 00:23:14,376
Thanks, uh,
for the cereal.
272
00:23:14,501 --> 00:23:17,501
I had a lovely evening.
273
00:23:17,626 --> 00:23:20,043
By the way, it says
"balls" on your face.
274
00:23:22,209 --> 00:23:25,126
- Asshole.
- My mom did it.
275
00:23:28,793 --> 00:23:31,001
In the spring...
276
00:23:31,084 --> 00:23:35,376
the hungry gator must find
new and clever ways to find food.
277
00:23:40,168 --> 00:23:43,043
Did you tell Large
about... the tapes?
278
00:23:43,126 --> 00:23:45,793
No, Mom. I'm not doing
those stupid tapes.
279
00:23:45,876 --> 00:23:47,834
- What are the tapes?
- Real estate tapes.
280
00:23:47,918 --> 00:23:51,668
You can make up to
$100,000 your first year.
281
00:23:51,751 --> 00:23:54,251
You should have seen the boat
this Oriental guy had.
282
00:23:54,376 --> 00:23:57,543
He even had his own game show in China,
he had so much money.
283
00:23:57,668 --> 00:23:59,668
I think Mark would be
perfect at it.
284
00:23:59,793 --> 00:24:02,959
Ma, shut up about those fuckin' tapes.
Okay? It's a scam.
285
00:24:03,043 --> 00:24:06,751
Well, I'm doing it.
I'm saving up for those tapes.
286
00:24:06,876 --> 00:24:08,126
Because I know what you could be
if you just apply yourself.
287
00:24:08,126 --> 00:24:09,668
Because I know what you could be
if you just apply yourself.
288
00:24:09,751 --> 00:24:12,751
You know what?
I do apply myself every day, Mom.
289
00:24:12,876 --> 00:24:15,960
I work my ass off
burying dead people. Okay?
290
00:24:16,043 --> 00:24:18,876
I'm only 26. I'm not in any rush.
What's your rush for?
291
00:24:20,793 --> 00:24:23,501
Just let me be.
I don't rush you.
292
00:24:26,085 --> 00:24:28,668
Okay. Then I'll
do 'em myself.
293
00:24:28,751 --> 00:24:31,626
Fine. Do 'em.
294
00:24:31,710 --> 00:24:35,585
Okay, then I won't
let you on my yacht.
295
00:24:35,710 --> 00:24:38,835
Except Large. Large, you can
come anytime you want.
296
00:24:38,960 --> 00:24:42,460
Just don't bring
your friend here.
297
00:24:44,501 --> 00:24:47,168
Shit! I got to go
to my meeting.
298
00:24:48,460 --> 00:24:50,460
Okay.
299
00:24:52,751 --> 00:24:54,668
I love you.
300
00:24:55,876 --> 00:24:58,293
- I love you too.
- I love you.
301
00:25:01,376 --> 00:25:04,543
- Large, it was nice to see you.
- Nice to see you too.
302
00:25:04,668 --> 00:25:07,293
Oh. Oh, you guys,
don't stay in here all day...
303
00:25:07,376 --> 00:25:10,251
'cause I took the batteries out of
the carbon monoxide detector.
304
00:25:10,376 --> 00:25:12,710
It was beeping all night.
305
00:25:15,668 --> 00:25:17,793
She drives me crazy!
306
00:25:17,876 --> 00:25:21,251
She gets all baked out and makes me
feel like I have to impress her.
307
00:25:21,376 --> 00:25:23,251
And you know what?
308
00:25:23,376 --> 00:25:25,835
I'm okay with being unimpressive.
I sleep better.
309
00:25:27,501 --> 00:25:31,293
- Hey, what time is it?
- No idea.
310
00:25:31,376 --> 00:25:33,335
I gotta go.
311
00:25:37,876 --> 00:25:40,043
Hi, I'm Andrew Largeman.
I'm sorry.
312
00:25:40,168 --> 00:25:43,293
- I'm really late for my appointment.
- Andrew. Andrew.
313
00:25:43,376 --> 00:25:46,835
Okay, Andrew. I'm gonna need you
to fill out this paperwork for me.
314
00:25:46,918 --> 00:25:49,085
As soon as we're ready,
we'll call you in.
315
00:25:49,210 --> 00:25:51,543
- Okay. Thank you. I'm sorry.
- It's okay. Have a seat.
316
00:25:51,668 --> 00:25:53,543
- Hello, Miss Lubin.
- Oh, hello there.
317
00:25:53,668 --> 00:25:56,168
Just have a seat.
We'll be with you soon, okay?
318
00:25:56,293 --> 00:25:58,501
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
319
00:26:22,251 --> 00:26:24,168
How's it going?
320
00:26:26,876 --> 00:26:28,960
- Get off.
321
00:26:29,043 --> 00:26:30,960
Get off.
322
00:26:39,543 --> 00:26:42,501
- Heel.
323
00:26:42,585 --> 00:26:45,876
- Heel!
324
00:26:49,376 --> 00:26:52,001
Got any suggestions?
325
00:26:52,126 --> 00:26:54,043
Oh, what?
326
00:26:54,168 --> 00:26:57,293
- You got any suggestions?
- Yeah, kick his balls.
327
00:26:58,918 --> 00:27:00,876
Kick his balls.
328
00:27:02,793 --> 00:27:06,501
Yeah, but I don't wanna destroy
future generations of charitable dogs.
329
00:27:06,626 --> 00:27:08,543
Don't worry about it.
I got three Dobermans.
330
00:27:08,626 --> 00:27:12,043
If I didn't kick them in the balls regularly,
I'd never get anything done.
331
00:27:12,168 --> 00:27:14,126
But he's gotta be close
to finishing by now.
332
00:27:14,210 --> 00:27:16,126
Not yet.
333
00:27:16,210 --> 00:27:18,335
Here comes the lipstick.
334
00:27:18,460 --> 00:27:20,751
Mrs. Lubin?
We're ready for you now.
335
00:27:20,876 --> 00:27:23,751
- Okay. Come on, Arthur.
336
00:27:29,918 --> 00:27:32,376
- I feel so used.
337
00:27:32,501 --> 00:27:36,251
Thanks for your help.
For, at least, your good intentions.
338
00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:40,793
- I recognize you.
- Oh, did you go to Columbia High?
339
00:27:40,876 --> 00:27:43,210
No, not from high school.
From TV.
340
00:27:43,293 --> 00:27:45,960
- Didn't you play the retarded quarterback?
- Yeah.
341
00:27:46,043 --> 00:27:48,043
Are you
really retarded?
342
00:27:49,460 --> 00:27:51,376
No, I'm not.
343
00:27:51,460 --> 00:27:53,585
Cool.
344
00:27:53,710 --> 00:27:57,335
Great job, man. I mean,
I thought you were really retarded.
345
00:27:57,418 --> 00:28:00,585
You're just as good as that Corky kid,
and he's actually retarded.
346
00:28:00,710 --> 00:28:02,835
If there was some
sort of retarded Oscar...
347
00:28:02,960 --> 00:28:06,501
you would win like
hands down, kick his ass.
348
00:28:06,626 --> 00:28:09,335
Well, thank you.
Thanks, I appreciate it.
349
00:28:09,418 --> 00:28:11,876
I have to fill out
this form though, so...
350
00:28:12,001 --> 00:28:13,876
- Right on.
- Thanks.
351
00:28:18,585 --> 00:28:21,168
My cousin's an actor.
Jake Ryan Winters.
352
00:28:21,251 --> 00:28:23,168
Doubt you've ever
heard of him.
353
00:28:23,251 --> 00:28:27,668
He was, like, on Xena once as a gnome
or something. That's really cool though.
354
00:28:27,751 --> 00:28:30,210
Thanks.
355
00:28:31,626 --> 00:28:33,543
Oh, my God.
356
00:28:33,626 --> 00:28:35,543
That scene.
That last scene...
357
00:28:35,626 --> 00:28:37,876
where you give the speech
to the whole stadium...
358
00:28:38,001 --> 00:28:40,793
and your dad... oh, your dad
gives you the thumbs up.
359
00:28:40,876 --> 00:28:43,793
Aw. That was, like...
360
00:28:43,876 --> 00:28:45,793
That was emotional.
361
00:28:47,335 --> 00:28:49,293
So, you got
anything else coming out?
362
00:28:49,376 --> 00:28:51,626
No. You know,
I'm auditioning...
363
00:28:51,710 --> 00:28:53,668
I can't believe
you're not really retarded.
364
00:28:53,751 --> 00:28:55,668
I mean, Jake's not
a very good actor.
365
00:28:55,751 --> 00:28:58,835
You can't really tell on Xena
'cause he's in the hairy gnome suit...
366
00:28:58,918 --> 00:29:02,460
but when we were little, he used to
put on these really, really low-budge...
367
00:29:02,543 --> 00:29:04,835
renditions of Andrew Lloyd Webber
musicals in our attic.
368
00:29:04,918 --> 00:29:07,876
And they were awful!
369
00:29:08,001 --> 00:29:10,210
Like, so bad.
370
00:29:12,168 --> 00:29:15,710
It sucks, though, because there's not
that much work for little people, you know?
371
00:29:15,835 --> 00:29:18,293
- Anyway, I'm talking too much.
372
00:29:18,376 --> 00:29:21,126
I'll just...
You got to fill out your forms.
373
00:29:21,210 --> 00:29:23,335
What are you
listening to?
374
00:29:23,418 --> 00:29:25,376
The Shins.
375
00:29:25,501 --> 00:29:27,876
- You know them?
- No.
376
00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:31,293
You gotta hear this one song.
It'll change your life. I swear.
377
00:29:31,376 --> 00:29:34,960
Oh, I'm sorry. You have to...
You gotta fill out your forms.
378
00:29:35,043 --> 00:29:36,960
Conundrum.
Think you could, uh...
379
00:29:37,043 --> 00:29:40,376
- maybe listen while you fill out your forms?
- I think I can handle it.
380
00:29:40,501 --> 00:29:42,460
Yeah? Okay.
381
00:29:55,126 --> 00:29:58,418
# Gold teeth and a curse
for this town
382
00:29:59,751 --> 00:30:01,835
# Were all in my mouth
383
00:30:01,960 --> 00:30:04,501
# Only, I don't know how
384
00:30:04,585 --> 00:30:06,710
#They got out, dear #
385
00:30:06,835 --> 00:30:08,710
#Turn me... ##
386
00:30:08,835 --> 00:30:10,710
It's good.
I like it.
387
00:30:12,960 --> 00:30:16,001
- So, what are you here for?
- What are you here for?
388
00:30:16,085 --> 00:30:18,210
Waiting for a friend. You?
389
00:30:19,585 --> 00:30:21,501
I, uh...
390
00:30:21,585 --> 00:30:24,001
Oh, fuck, that was nosy.
I'm sorry.
391
00:30:24,085 --> 00:30:27,710
I am so nosy. I didn't...
I didn't mean to be. I'm sorry.
392
00:30:27,835 --> 00:30:31,001
No, I just... I get these headaches.
I just want to have it checked out.
393
00:30:31,126 --> 00:30:33,126
Cool.
394
00:30:33,210 --> 00:30:35,126
- Andrew Largeman?
- Yes.
395
00:30:35,210 --> 00:30:38,543
- We're ready for you now.
- Oh, okay.
396
00:30:38,668 --> 00:30:41,543
- Thank you. Nice meeting you.
- You didn't. I'm Sam.
397
00:30:41,668 --> 00:30:43,293
Andrew.
398
00:30:43,376 --> 00:30:46,835
Nice to meet you.
Good luck with your head.
399
00:30:46,918 --> 00:30:48,876
Thanks.
400
00:30:50,335 --> 00:30:52,626
Don't worry, Sam.
We'll be with you next.
401
00:31:22,085 --> 00:31:25,127
- Mr. Andrew Largeman?
- Yes, hi.
402
00:31:25,210 --> 00:31:27,335
- There's absolutely nothing wrong with you.
- What?
403
00:31:27,418 --> 00:31:30,460
Just kidding.
How would I know that? Uh...
404
00:31:31,543 --> 00:31:33,960
I'm Dr. Cohen.
405
00:31:36,127 --> 00:31:38,210
What can we do
for you today, Andrew.
406
00:31:39,585 --> 00:31:41,960
Um, I've been getting these
really intense headaches.
407
00:31:42,043 --> 00:31:45,293
Um, they last for
like a split second.
408
00:31:45,377 --> 00:31:49,210
It's like lightning, like a surge
of electricity, and then it's gone.
409
00:31:53,043 --> 00:31:54,960
Lithium?
410
00:31:55,043 --> 00:31:57,127
How long have you been
on the lithium?
411
00:31:57,210 --> 00:32:01,710
Um, I've been on some form of it
since I was 10 or so.
412
00:32:04,043 --> 00:32:06,835
And the Paxil,
Zoloft, Celexa...
413
00:32:06,918 --> 00:32:08,877
Depakote...
414
00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:11,460
did they, uh,
help you at all?
415
00:32:11,543 --> 00:32:13,460
No.
416
00:32:14,585 --> 00:32:16,585
I mean,
I don't know. Uh...
417
00:32:16,710 --> 00:32:20,002
It's recently occurred to me I might not
even have a problem.
418
00:32:20,127 --> 00:32:24,543
Only, I'd never know it because as far back
as I can remember, I've been medicated.
419
00:32:24,627 --> 00:32:26,835
I left them
in L.A. though.
420
00:32:26,960 --> 00:32:31,168
This is, uh, the first time I haven't had
medicine in my body for... a long time.
421
00:32:31,293 --> 00:32:33,835
You know that stuff will
leave your body pretty fast.
422
00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:38,377
- I can write you a prescription.
- Actually, I was thinking about
taking a little vacation.
423
00:32:38,502 --> 00:32:40,793
Have you discussed this
with your psychiatrist?
424
00:32:40,877 --> 00:32:44,210
Uh, well,
my psychiatrist is my dad.
425
00:32:45,877 --> 00:32:48,918
Yeah. So I think he'd
prefer me to stay on it.
426
00:32:49,043 --> 00:32:52,210
He... likes to think
it makes me happy.
427
00:32:54,168 --> 00:32:57,377
You know, our bodies are capable
of doing some very funny things...
428
00:32:57,502 --> 00:32:59,877
when they're consumed
with stress and anxiety.
429
00:33:00,960 --> 00:33:02,668
Uh...
430
00:33:02,793 --> 00:33:07,627
I found my ex-best friend's
cuff links in my wife's purse.
431
00:33:10,252 --> 00:33:12,877
I couldn't get an erection
for a year and a half...
432
00:33:13,002 --> 00:33:14,877
for example.
433
00:33:16,710 --> 00:33:20,002
Wow. Um...
434
00:33:20,085 --> 00:33:22,918
But I don't really think
that's it because I don't...
435
00:33:23,043 --> 00:33:26,377
I don't really feel like
stressed or anxious at all.
436
00:33:26,502 --> 00:33:30,210
'Cause all the lithium he's had you on.
It's amazing you can even hear me now.
437
00:33:32,460 --> 00:33:34,668
Look, Andrew, uh,
first of all...
438
00:33:34,793 --> 00:33:38,252
I think you do need to find
a psychiatrist that isn't your father.
439
00:33:38,377 --> 00:33:41,168
That's something that should have
been remedied years ago.
440
00:33:41,252 --> 00:33:43,168
He knows better.
441
00:33:43,252 --> 00:33:46,252
And secondly, uh, I'm in
no position to comment on...
442
00:33:46,377 --> 00:33:49,960
whether you should stay on the meds or not
because I don't know your story.
443
00:33:50,043 --> 00:33:54,002
But my opinion,
since you're paying for it...
444
00:33:54,127 --> 00:33:57,710
is that, yeah, those drugs may help you
as a means to an end...
445
00:33:57,835 --> 00:34:00,502
but sooner or later, if you're not
in some sort of therapy...
446
00:34:00,627 --> 00:34:04,835
whatever's going on in your mind will find
a way to peek its little head out of the water.
447
00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:07,127
- Are you all right?
- Yeah.
448
00:34:07,210 --> 00:34:09,293
Yeah, you're all right.
You're alive.
449
00:34:09,377 --> 00:34:12,210
Come on.
I'll take a look at you. Come.
450
00:34:14,668 --> 00:34:18,127
I'll need you to take your shoes off.
I have to scratch your feet.
451
00:34:51,085 --> 00:34:53,377
So why were you
really there?
452
00:34:53,502 --> 00:34:55,502
Charging.
I'm a robot.
453
00:34:57,043 --> 00:35:00,627
- Do you lie a lot?
- What do you consider a lot?
454
00:35:00,710 --> 00:35:02,710
Enough for people
to call you a liar.
455
00:35:02,793 --> 00:35:06,335
- People call me lots of things.
- Is one of them "liar"?
456
00:35:06,418 --> 00:35:09,293
I could say no, but how would
you know I'm not lyin'?
457
00:35:09,377 --> 00:35:11,877
I guess I could choose
to trust you.
458
00:35:12,002 --> 00:35:14,460
- You can do that?
- I can try.
459
00:35:14,543 --> 00:35:16,835
Whose bike is that?
460
00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:21,168
It was my grandfather's.
461
00:35:21,293 --> 00:35:25,793
It was the only thing he left to anyone
in my family, and he left it to me.
462
00:35:25,877 --> 00:35:27,877
And I like it.
463
00:35:30,418 --> 00:35:34,793
So this is the point in the conversation
where you ask me if I'd like a ride home.
464
00:35:34,877 --> 00:35:37,043
- It is?
- Yep.
465
00:35:39,335 --> 00:35:41,210
Would you like a ride home?
466
00:35:43,752 --> 00:35:47,335
Fine. But I'm not
getting in that sidecar.
467
00:35:47,460 --> 00:35:50,168
- Why not?
- Sidecars are for bitches.
468
00:35:50,252 --> 00:35:53,002
Anyone who rides in that
is automatically your bitch.
469
00:35:53,085 --> 00:35:55,668
Thus, I will ride
on the back.
470
00:36:03,918 --> 00:36:05,835
- Whoa.
- Hold on tight.
471
00:36:05,918 --> 00:36:08,002
Okay. Holdin'.
472
00:36:11,585 --> 00:36:13,752
My hair is blowin'
in the wind.
473
00:36:18,585 --> 00:36:20,502
What, are you
like a hang glider?
474
00:36:20,585 --> 00:36:23,043
My boyfriend was gonna
pick me up so I brought it.
475
00:36:23,168 --> 00:36:26,627
- But then he couldn't.
- What does he have? One of those tandem things?
476
00:36:26,710 --> 00:36:29,460
No. He drives a Ninja.
Goes way faster than this guy.
477
00:36:29,543 --> 00:36:33,002
- But what kind of helmet is that?
- You can wear it on a bike.
478
00:36:33,127 --> 00:36:35,668
- Anyway, how's your head?
- I should live through the day.
479
00:36:35,752 --> 00:36:37,668
Cool.
Make a right here.
480
00:36:42,418 --> 00:36:45,210
Are you doing
anything right now?
481
00:36:45,335 --> 00:36:48,418
- Can you elaborate on "doing anything"?
- I know this guy, Jesse.
482
00:36:48,543 --> 00:36:50,543
He bought this mansion
that's right up here...
483
00:36:50,668 --> 00:36:52,543
and he wants me
to come visit him.
484
00:36:52,668 --> 00:36:56,835
But I don't want to stay very long.
I was thinking, like if you came too...
485
00:36:56,960 --> 00:37:00,377
I could just say I have to take you home
when I'm ready to go.
486
00:37:00,460 --> 00:37:03,627
Wow. That's pretty damn
random of you, Andrew.
487
00:37:03,710 --> 00:37:06,210
- I know.
- "Nice to meet you. Can I use you?"
488
00:37:06,293 --> 00:37:08,293
- No.
- It's the Hollywood in you, I guess.
489
00:37:08,377 --> 00:37:10,835
No. Come on.
It's not like that. It'll be fun.
490
00:37:10,918 --> 00:37:14,168
I'll tell you what, we can have like...
like a signal.
491
00:37:14,252 --> 00:37:17,293
Like, when you pull on your ear,
that's the code.
492
00:37:17,377 --> 00:37:21,377
And then I'll be like, "Oh, I got to
take her home." And then we'll go.
493
00:37:23,043 --> 00:37:25,127
Can we have
code names too?
494
00:37:25,210 --> 00:37:27,668
If you want.
495
00:37:27,752 --> 00:37:30,668
Okay. But don't try
and like kidnap me or anything...
496
00:37:30,752 --> 00:37:34,668
'cause my step-uncle's a bounty hunter
and he could have you tracked and killed.
497
00:37:34,752 --> 00:37:36,877
You're such a liar.
498
00:37:39,377 --> 00:37:41,252
Whoo!
499
00:37:42,793 --> 00:37:45,002
Okay. You ready?
500
00:38:06,210 --> 00:38:09,127
I'll be fine. Am I the first boy
you've ever brought home?
501
00:38:09,210 --> 00:38:11,169
No. But, um...
502
00:38:11,252 --> 00:38:14,377
I lied to you before when I told you
my boyfriend drives a Ninja.
503
00:38:14,502 --> 00:38:17,502
- He doesn't drive a bike?
- No, I don't have a boyfriend.
504
00:38:18,627 --> 00:38:21,377
But, you know,
he might drive a Ninja.
505
00:38:21,502 --> 00:38:24,669
- Wherever he is.
- Wow. We're off to a great start.
506
00:38:24,752 --> 00:38:28,919
Okay. So...
So sometimes I lie.
507
00:38:29,044 --> 00:38:31,710
I mean,
I'm weird, man.
508
00:38:31,835 --> 00:38:34,835
About random stuff too.
I don't even know why I do it.
509
00:38:34,960 --> 00:38:36,877
It's like...
It's like a tic.
510
00:38:36,960 --> 00:38:41,377
I mean, sometimes I hear myself
say something, and then I think...
511
00:38:41,502 --> 00:38:43,960
"Wow, that wasn't even
remotely true."
512
00:38:44,044 --> 00:38:46,627
So how do people know
what's real?
513
00:38:46,710 --> 00:38:50,752
Well, I always feel bad afterwards
and admit them when they're lies.
514
00:38:51,960 --> 00:38:53,877
Can you trust that?
515
00:38:53,960 --> 00:38:57,002
Open the door.
516
00:38:58,710 --> 00:38:59,960
Okay.
517
00:38:59,960 --> 00:39:00,877
Okay.
518
00:39:04,960 --> 00:39:07,460
Kevin, down.
Mom!
519
00:39:07,544 --> 00:39:10,377
Come on. Kick him in the balls.
Kick him in the balls.
520
00:39:10,502 --> 00:39:12,669
Mom!
521
00:39:12,794 --> 00:39:15,710
All right! Everybody down!
Who wants to eat?
522
00:39:15,794 --> 00:39:19,002
Do you want to eat?
Then get the fuck off him.
523
00:39:19,127 --> 00:39:21,794
Kevin!
Get off!
524
00:39:21,877 --> 00:39:25,169
I'm so sorry. We just don't have
the time to train them.
525
00:39:25,294 --> 00:39:27,502
Who's got the time
to train them?
526
00:39:27,585 --> 00:39:30,294
- Mom, this is Andrew.
- Welcome.
527
00:39:30,377 --> 00:39:32,294
Welcome.
I'm sorry the place is a wreck.
528
00:39:32,377 --> 00:39:35,752
Honey, I asked you to get
the metal wheel out of the hamster cage.
529
00:39:35,877 --> 00:39:38,752
- I forgot.
- Well, you forgot and now Jelly's dead.
530
00:39:38,877 --> 00:39:41,002
Luckily, I got Peanut Butter out in time.
531
00:39:41,085 --> 00:39:43,544
We have to get
the only hamsters on planet Earth...
532
00:39:43,627 --> 00:39:45,794
who can't figure out
a stupid hamster wheel.
533
00:39:45,877 --> 00:39:48,002
There's a tin box
on the kitchen counter.
534
00:39:48,127 --> 00:39:50,669
You can do the honors.
I have to get to work.
535
00:39:50,794 --> 00:39:52,794
- It's nice to meet you. Andrew, right?
- Yes.
536
00:39:52,877 --> 00:39:55,169
Andrew.
Very nice to meet you.
537
00:39:55,294 --> 00:39:57,835
Samatha, put the clothes
in the dryer and buryJelly.
538
00:40:01,377 --> 00:40:03,669
So this is it.
539
00:40:12,419 --> 00:40:14,627
- It's nice.
- No, it's not.
540
00:40:14,710 --> 00:40:17,460
Don't say that just 'cause
you can't think of anything else.
541
00:40:17,544 --> 00:40:19,877
I'm not. I'm not.
It's... It's very cozy.
542
00:40:20,002 --> 00:40:22,460
You guys are a little early
on the tree though.
543
00:40:22,544 --> 00:40:26,502
Yeah, we never got around to taking it down.
When it got to be fall again...
544
00:40:26,627 --> 00:40:28,544
we figured,
"Just leave it up."
545
00:40:28,627 --> 00:40:31,877
Oh, my God. You're totally freaked out.
You're totally freaked out right now.
546
00:40:32,002 --> 00:40:35,169
- You, like, can't wait to leave.
- I'm not. I'm not. I like it.
547
00:40:35,252 --> 00:40:37,877
- It's very nice.
- Well, you wanna see my room?
548
00:40:38,002 --> 00:40:39,877
Sure.
549
00:40:40,919 --> 00:40:42,835
- Hey.
- Hey.
550
00:40:42,919 --> 00:40:46,002
Titembay, this is my friend Andrew.
Andrew, this is my brother, Titembay.
551
00:40:46,085 --> 00:40:49,627
- Hi. It's very nice to meet you.
- Oh, it's nice to meet you.
552
00:40:49,710 --> 00:40:51,835
- I'm sorry aboutJelly.
- Oh, that's okay.
553
00:40:51,919 --> 00:40:54,544
I saved some mac and cheese for you.
It's in the fridge.
554
00:40:54,669 --> 00:40:56,669
Thank you.
555
00:41:00,627 --> 00:41:04,044
Anyway, I'm late for class.
It's nice meeting you.
556
00:41:04,169 --> 00:41:06,960
- Very nice to meet you.
- See you later.
557
00:41:10,419 --> 00:41:12,335
So here we are.
558
00:41:12,419 --> 00:41:15,544
It's nothing fancy,
but you know... What?
559
00:41:17,335 --> 00:41:19,877
Uh, it's... Titembay, right?
560
00:41:20,002 --> 00:41:22,752
Yeah, it's weird, huh?
You're, like, so freaked out right now.
561
00:41:22,877 --> 00:41:26,169
You're running for the door. It's okay.
You can go. Don't feel bad. It's really...
562
00:41:26,252 --> 00:41:28,210
- Stop doing that.
- What?
563
00:41:28,335 --> 00:41:31,669
The whole thing you just did. I wanna be here.
If I didn't, I wouldn't be.
564
00:41:31,752 --> 00:41:34,502
Trust me, my family is way more
fucked up than yours. Okay?
565
00:41:34,585 --> 00:41:36,210
Okay.
566
00:41:36,335 --> 00:41:39,210
So, Titembay.
567
00:41:39,294 --> 00:41:43,002
- Yeah, he's my brother.
- Is he adopted or...
568
00:41:43,127 --> 00:41:46,127
Kind of. My mom adopted him
from Sally Struthers like years ago.
569
00:41:46,210 --> 00:41:49,877
One of those "For the cost
of a cup of coffee a day" sort of things.
570
00:41:50,002 --> 00:41:53,502
Where she's like, "How can you
just sit there and not help the children?"
571
00:41:53,627 --> 00:41:57,002
And we couldn't. We just couldn't sit there
and not help the children.
572
00:41:57,085 --> 00:42:00,419
So we start sending him like
pictures and letters and stuff for years...
573
00:42:00,544 --> 00:42:04,294
but then I got really into ice-skating,
so we sort of forgot about him.
574
00:42:04,377 --> 00:42:07,419
Then one day we get this phone call
and it's Titembay.
575
00:42:07,544 --> 00:42:09,710
And he's at the dry cleaners
around the corner.
576
00:42:09,835 --> 00:42:12,544
And he's like, "I'm at Rutgers.
I live in the dorms...
577
00:42:12,669 --> 00:42:16,127
but I'm used to living with my tribe
so I'd rather live with a family."
578
00:42:16,210 --> 00:42:18,669
And he's been living
with us ever since.
579
00:42:18,752 --> 00:42:21,210
Wow.
580
00:42:21,294 --> 00:42:24,210
Yeah. I know.
He's the most amazing guy.
581
00:42:24,335 --> 00:42:28,169
You gotta hear his stories. He struggled
through so much because he wanted to learn.
582
00:42:28,252 --> 00:42:30,377
When I think of what
he's accomplished, I just...
583
00:42:30,502 --> 00:42:32,419
I just feel,
like, lazy. You know?
584
00:42:32,544 --> 00:42:35,377
He's studying criminal justice at Rutgers,
and when he was a baby...
585
00:42:35,460 --> 00:42:38,710
he was one of those kids with,
like, the flies all over his face.
586
00:42:40,044 --> 00:42:42,335
Wow.
587
00:42:42,460 --> 00:42:44,377
I mean,
i-it's a crazy story.
588
00:42:44,460 --> 00:42:48,377
Yeah, I know. I mean, that's a true story.
I am not that good.
589
00:42:49,502 --> 00:42:52,002
This is Tickle.
590
00:42:52,127 --> 00:42:56,419
- What is Tickle?
- Tickle's my favorite thing in the whole world.
591
00:42:56,544 --> 00:42:59,502
It's all that's left
of Nanny, my blanket.
592
00:42:59,585 --> 00:43:01,794
- Tickle's all that remains.
- Mm-hmm.
593
00:43:01,877 --> 00:43:04,335
- Was there like a hurricane or something?
- Shut up.
594
00:43:04,419 --> 00:43:07,794
No, I mean, I've had this
since I was a baby.
595
00:43:07,877 --> 00:43:10,627
It's what they brought me home
in from the hospital.
596
00:43:11,919 --> 00:43:14,919
- It's like the Wailing Wall.
- What?
597
00:43:15,044 --> 00:43:17,335
Uh, the Wailing Wall
is like this, uh...
598
00:43:17,460 --> 00:43:21,002
It's like the most holy place
forJews to go and pray in Israel.
599
00:43:21,127 --> 00:43:25,794
It's all that's left of this enormous temple
that was destroyed by the Romans.
600
00:43:25,877 --> 00:43:28,669
So you're like
reallyJewish.
601
00:43:28,794 --> 00:43:30,710
- What?
- You are, aren't you?
602
00:43:30,794 --> 00:43:32,877
- You are.
- No, I'm not.
603
00:43:33,002 --> 00:43:34,877
l-I'm Jewish,
but I'm not reallyJewish.
604
00:43:35,002 --> 00:43:37,752
I don't do anything Jewish.
I don't go to temple or anything.
605
00:43:37,877 --> 00:43:40,085
But I don't know anyJews
that go to temple.
606
00:43:40,210 --> 00:43:42,335
TheJews I know,
they go on one day.
607
00:43:42,419 --> 00:43:45,419
- It's Yom Kippur, the Day of Repentance.
- Okay.
608
00:43:45,544 --> 00:43:48,335
Did you know that most temples
are built with moveable walls...
609
00:43:48,419 --> 00:43:51,794
so that on the one day of the year
when everyone comes to repent...
610
00:43:51,877 --> 00:43:54,627
they can actually make the room
big enough to hold everyone?
611
00:43:54,710 --> 00:43:57,335
I don't really
believe in God.
612
00:43:57,419 --> 00:44:00,169
- Just Tickle.
- Oh, I believe in Tickle.
613
00:44:02,294 --> 00:44:04,835
- We're not gonna make out or anything.
- What?
614
00:44:04,919 --> 00:44:07,710
I'm sorry.
I just totally ruined that moment, didn't I?
615
00:44:07,835 --> 00:44:10,460
- No, no.
- It's just that we're not gonna make out, okay?
616
00:44:10,544 --> 00:44:12,669
- Oh, no, I hadn't planned on trying...
- Oh, my...
617
00:44:12,794 --> 00:44:15,335
I am so lame.
That was like really... I am...
618
00:44:15,419 --> 00:44:17,585
I'm sorry.
Forget I just said that. I am...
619
00:44:17,710 --> 00:44:19,627
That was dumb. And...
620
00:44:19,710 --> 00:44:22,877
- You know what I do
when I feel completely unoriginal?
- What?
621
00:44:24,169 --> 00:44:27,544
# La, blah, blah
Blah, la, la ##
622
00:44:27,669 --> 00:44:31,210
I make a noise or I do something
that no one has ever done before.
623
00:44:31,335 --> 00:44:35,127
And then I can feel unique again
even if it's only for like a second.
624
00:44:35,210 --> 00:44:37,835
So, no one's
ever done that?
625
00:44:37,960 --> 00:44:42,044
No, not in this spot. No. You just witnessed
a completely original moment in history.
626
00:44:42,169 --> 00:44:44,627
- It's refreshing. You should try it.
- Oh, no. Thanks.
627
00:44:44,710 --> 00:44:47,460
- No, come on.
- I think that was good enough for both of us.
628
00:44:47,544 --> 00:44:49,710
Come on.
What are you, shy?
629
00:44:49,835 --> 00:44:52,127
This is your one opportunity
to do something...
630
00:44:52,210 --> 00:44:56,669
that no one has done before and that no one
will copy again throughout human existence.
631
00:44:56,752 --> 00:45:01,169
A-And if nothing else, you'll be remembered
as the one guy who ever did this.
632
00:45:01,252 --> 00:45:03,169
This one thing.
633
00:45:05,335 --> 00:45:07,794
Uh...
634
00:45:12,544 --> 00:45:14,461
How was that?
635
00:45:14,544 --> 00:45:16,794
Oh, I've done
that one before.
636
00:45:16,877 --> 00:45:18,294
- So, uh...
637
00:45:18,294 --> 00:45:19,252
- So, uh...
638
00:45:19,377 --> 00:45:22,336
I gotta go bury this hamster
before the dogs eat him.
639
00:45:22,419 --> 00:45:25,127
Wanna help? Hmm?
640
00:45:36,419 --> 00:45:39,711
- Wow.
- Yeah.
641
00:45:39,836 --> 00:45:42,002
- I mean, this is, uh...
- I know.
642
00:45:42,086 --> 00:45:45,169
It's not that we're bad
pet owners or anything.
643
00:45:45,252 --> 00:45:49,169
It's just, you know, we've had
so many of them over the years.
644
00:45:49,252 --> 00:45:51,502
Besides,
a lot of these are fish.
645
00:45:51,627 --> 00:45:53,711
After you.
646
00:46:01,877 --> 00:46:04,502
All right.
647
00:46:07,294 --> 00:46:09,211
Sit down.
648
00:46:16,377 --> 00:46:18,377
What are you
thinking about?
649
00:46:20,002 --> 00:46:22,169
- Now?
- Yeah.
650
00:46:22,294 --> 00:46:25,336
- Right now?
- Yeah.
651
00:46:25,419 --> 00:46:29,252
Right now, I was thinking I've been
going to a lot of these things lately.
652
00:46:29,377 --> 00:46:31,794
- What, dates?
- Not dates.
653
00:46:31,877 --> 00:46:34,919
Is this a date?
This isn't a date.
654
00:46:35,044 --> 00:46:37,002
Funerals.
655
00:46:37,086 --> 00:46:39,044
Why? Who else died?
656
00:46:40,836 --> 00:46:43,044
Oh, uh...
657
00:46:43,169 --> 00:46:47,044
That's why I'm home actually. I guess
I haven't even told you that yet. Um...
658
00:46:51,294 --> 00:46:53,377
My mom just died.
659
00:46:58,461 --> 00:47:01,586
God, that's weird
to say that out loud, but, uh...
660
00:47:02,752 --> 00:47:05,586
My mom just died.
And, uh...
661
00:47:05,711 --> 00:47:08,211
Yeah, that's why I'm home.
662
00:47:08,336 --> 00:47:10,669
I'm so sorry.
663
00:47:10,794 --> 00:47:12,836
God, I'm so sorry.
664
00:47:12,919 --> 00:47:15,794
And here I am, like, putting you
through another one of these.
665
00:47:15,877 --> 00:47:17,836
Not thatJelly's like
anywhere near your mom's.
666
00:47:17,919 --> 00:47:20,669
I mean,
we loved Jelly but...
667
00:47:20,794 --> 00:47:22,711
I'm so sorry.
668
00:47:22,794 --> 00:47:25,502
No, it's okay.
It's all right.
669
00:47:25,627 --> 00:47:27,544
I'm all right with it.
670
00:47:27,669 --> 00:47:30,336
Anyway, I think it's
what she wanted, so...
671
00:47:30,419 --> 00:47:32,836
How'd she die?
672
00:47:34,419 --> 00:47:36,377
She drowned actually.
673
00:47:39,336 --> 00:47:41,794
Yeah, my, uh...
My mother was a paraplegic.
674
00:47:41,877 --> 00:47:44,419
She was in a wheelchair
so she, uh...
675
00:47:44,544 --> 00:47:46,669
You know, and, uh...
676
00:47:46,752 --> 00:47:48,836
I guess she was
taking a bath...
677
00:47:48,961 --> 00:47:50,961
and she must have
slipped or something.
678
00:47:51,044 --> 00:47:54,002
That's what they say.
I don't... I don't know. But...
679
00:47:54,086 --> 00:47:56,127
needless to say,
she drowned and...
680
00:47:56,211 --> 00:47:59,211
that's how she...
sh-she died.
681
00:47:59,336 --> 00:48:01,711
When?
682
00:48:01,836 --> 00:48:04,211
This was, uh...
683
00:48:05,252 --> 00:48:07,211
Sunday.
684
00:48:07,294 --> 00:48:09,586
Oh, my God.
685
00:48:15,169 --> 00:48:17,044
Why are you crying?
686
00:48:19,086 --> 00:48:21,044
I don't know.
I'm sorry.
687
00:48:22,377 --> 00:48:24,627
Because... I'm not
usually like this.
688
00:48:24,711 --> 00:48:29,211
It's just like...
It's just so sad.
689
00:48:29,336 --> 00:48:31,877
You know, it's like...
690
00:48:32,002 --> 00:48:34,877
It's so tragic, isn't it?
It is. It's like...
691
00:48:34,961 --> 00:48:38,794
It's like real life
tragedy or something.
692
00:48:38,877 --> 00:48:41,836
Anyway, let's change
the subject, okay?
693
00:48:41,919 --> 00:48:44,002
Let's really bring
the focus back toJelly...
694
00:48:44,127 --> 00:48:47,211
'cause what could be ruder than talking
about someone else who died...
695
00:48:47,336 --> 00:48:50,002
when you're in the act of
burying a close friend?
696
00:48:50,086 --> 00:48:54,294
- Well, what should we do?
- I don't know. I've only been
to one of these things.
697
00:48:54,377 --> 00:48:56,502
You appear to be
the expert.
698
00:48:56,627 --> 00:48:59,461
Well, we usually
say something.
699
00:48:59,544 --> 00:49:02,336
Okay, uh,
I'll go first. Um...
700
00:49:04,044 --> 00:49:07,419
Didn't really know you, Jelly.
From what I hear, you were a good pet.
701
00:49:07,544 --> 00:49:09,961
- Little trouble with the wheel but...
- That's not funny.
702
00:49:15,877 --> 00:49:17,836
Jelly, you were
a great pet.
703
00:49:20,127 --> 00:49:23,169
I'm sorry I forgot to take
the wheel out of your cage.
704
00:49:23,294 --> 00:49:26,044
I'm so, so sorry
about that.
705
00:49:27,086 --> 00:49:29,627
Good-bye.
706
00:49:29,711 --> 00:49:31,877
I hope that you liked me.
707
00:50:15,211 --> 00:50:17,336
Holy shit! You scared
the shit out of me.
708
00:50:17,461 --> 00:50:20,544
- Why are you always doing that?
- I haven't seen you in a while.
709
00:50:20,669 --> 00:50:23,044
I know. I've been catching up
with people around here.
710
00:50:23,169 --> 00:50:26,627
Dr. Cohen called.
There's nothing wrong with you.
711
00:50:26,711 --> 00:50:29,877
Yeah, I think I'm starting
to figure that out myself.
712
00:50:30,002 --> 00:50:33,711
- When are you thinking of leaving?
- Uh, probably tomorrow.
713
00:50:33,836 --> 00:50:38,002
Um, you know, I got a lot of stuff
I got to take care of in L.A.
714
00:50:38,086 --> 00:50:41,544
- Probably have to find a newjob, so...
- We need to talk.
715
00:50:42,836 --> 00:50:45,627
Yeah, uh, how?
I mean, when?
716
00:50:46,711 --> 00:50:49,336
What are you
doing... now?
717
00:50:51,086 --> 00:50:54,961
Uh, now's not so good. I told my friend Mark
I was gonna meet up with him.
718
00:50:55,044 --> 00:50:57,044
But how about, uh,
like later tonight?
719
00:50:57,127 --> 00:51:00,377
- Okay. Then we'll talk.
- Yeah.
720
00:51:00,502 --> 00:51:02,544
We owe that
to each other.
721
00:51:03,669 --> 00:51:05,544
Yeah.
722
00:51:05,669 --> 00:51:07,669
We owe it to her.
723
00:51:09,127 --> 00:51:11,544
Yeah.
724
00:51:11,669 --> 00:51:13,544
Good.
725
00:51:13,669 --> 00:51:15,586
Sorry I scared you.
726
00:51:18,419 --> 00:51:20,669
How could you
leave all that lithium?
727
00:51:20,794 --> 00:51:23,419
I was totally going to
hit you up for some, man.
728
00:51:23,544 --> 00:51:26,836
This fucking guy.
I'm glad you're back, man.
729
00:51:26,961 --> 00:51:30,711
This town is so messed up.
Everyone's got their drug of choice.
730
00:51:30,836 --> 00:51:33,961
It's like in Brave New World.
You ever read that book?
731
00:51:34,044 --> 00:51:38,336
Who wrote that?
Um, Aldous... Aldous something.
732
00:51:38,461 --> 00:51:41,502
Aldous, uh...
Anyway...
733
00:51:41,586 --> 00:51:46,044
there's like Alphas and Betas
and Epsilons and all sorts of people.
734
00:51:59,544 --> 00:52:01,961
Huxtable.
735
00:52:02,044 --> 00:52:06,336
Aldous Huxtable.
That's it, bro.
736
00:52:21,794 --> 00:52:25,461
Andrew, would you like
to see Sam's ice-skating tape?
737
00:52:25,586 --> 00:52:27,378
- Mom, no.
- Absolutely.
738
00:52:27,461 --> 00:52:30,878
She was so ahead of her time.
She could have gone to the Olympics.
739
00:52:30,961 --> 00:52:32,961
No, no, no, no.
I couldn't have.
740
00:52:33,086 --> 00:52:35,294
Yes, you could have.
Don't blame it on the epilepsy.
741
00:52:35,419 --> 00:52:39,044
- You had a gift.
- Come on. Let me see it.
742
00:52:39,128 --> 00:52:42,919
Let's just show him the "Florida Stars
of the Ice"opening. The gator costume.
743
00:52:43,003 --> 00:52:47,128
- Mom, I'm asking you, seriously.
- Come on. Don't be shy. Let me see it!
744
00:52:47,253 --> 00:52:51,461
Oh, she wants you to see it. How could you
not want him to see how talented you are?
745
00:52:51,586 --> 00:52:54,919
- Were.
- Come on.
746
00:52:55,003 --> 00:52:57,503
- Come on.
- Ohh!
747
00:52:59,628 --> 00:53:02,253
- Honey, what are you doing?
- I'm dusting for prints.
748
00:53:02,336 --> 00:53:04,544
Well, could we move
the crime scene into the kitchen?
749
00:53:04,628 --> 00:53:06,544
I want to show Andrew
Sam's skating.
750
00:53:06,628 --> 00:53:10,086
But someone's been pissing on my GameCube,
and I'm about to close the case.
751
00:53:10,169 --> 00:53:12,253
It wasn't me, Your Honor.
752
00:53:12,336 --> 00:53:14,794
The paw prints
point to a canine. Hmm.
753
00:53:14,919 --> 00:53:17,086
Andrew, come on.
Sit down here on the couch.
754
00:53:17,169 --> 00:53:20,086
I can't believe you're
actually showing him this.
755
00:53:23,378 --> 00:53:25,586
Look, there she is.
756
00:53:38,753 --> 00:53:42,836
- You're the alligator?
- You can tell by the hands.
757
00:54:06,294 --> 00:54:09,794
- Here comes the double axel.
- And...
758
00:54:09,919 --> 00:54:14,253
- Land! Oh, I mean, come on. Is she good?
- Wow, she's great.
759
00:54:17,878 --> 00:54:20,919
- All right.
- Wow.
760
00:54:21,003 --> 00:54:24,294
- Shut up.
- No, I mean, your mom was right.
You're really good.
761
00:54:26,169 --> 00:54:28,794
- This is awesome, but we gotta go.
- All right.
762
00:54:28,919 --> 00:54:31,128
- Just wanted to show how talented you are.
- Mom, come on!
763
00:54:31,253 --> 00:54:33,003
My baby!
All right, go on!
764
00:54:33,128 --> 00:54:36,003
Go on. Get away.
Wait a minute.
765
00:54:36,128 --> 00:54:38,253
Gimme a hug.
766
00:54:38,378 --> 00:54:40,794
I love you so much.
I'm so proud of you.
767
00:54:40,878 --> 00:54:42,919
- I love you too.
- Have a good night.
768
00:54:43,003 --> 00:54:45,461
- Thanks for dinner.
- Come on! You're giving me a hug too.
769
00:54:45,544 --> 00:54:48,294
- Mom! Come on.
- I'll take a hug.
770
00:54:56,919 --> 00:54:59,919
- Good night. See you later, Tim.
- Bye, Tim.
771
00:55:00,044 --> 00:55:03,044
- Peace out, player.
772
00:55:03,128 --> 00:55:06,169
I don't know. It was
the only thing I ever liked doing.
773
00:55:06,294 --> 00:55:08,544
Pretending
to be someone else.
774
00:55:08,628 --> 00:55:12,794
I've been so out of it lately, the only parts
I get offered are playing handicapped people.
775
00:55:12,919 --> 00:55:14,878
- That is not funny.
776
00:55:14,961 --> 00:55:17,336
Oh, come on.
You gotta see that's a joke.
777
00:55:17,461 --> 00:55:21,336
If you can't laugh at yourself, life's gonna seem
a whole lot longer than you'd like.
778
00:55:21,461 --> 00:55:23,461
All right, so what are
we laughing at you about?
779
00:55:23,586 --> 00:55:27,086
Mm.
I lied again.
780
00:55:27,169 --> 00:55:31,253
- I have epilepsy.
- Which part are we laughing about?
781
00:55:32,461 --> 00:55:35,003
I, um...
782
00:55:35,128 --> 00:55:37,378
I had a seizure at
the law office where I work.
783
00:55:37,461 --> 00:55:40,794
And they told me their insurance wouldn't
cover me unless I wore preventative covering.
784
00:55:40,919 --> 00:55:45,586
- What's preventative covering?
- The helmet I was wearing.
785
00:55:45,669 --> 00:55:47,586
Oh, come on!
786
00:55:47,669 --> 00:55:49,586
That's funny.
That's really funny.
787
00:55:49,669 --> 00:55:51,919
I mean, I'm the only person
who wears a helmet to work...
788
00:55:52,044 --> 00:55:56,669
who isn't, like, putting out fires,
or, like, racing for NASCAR.
789
00:55:56,794 --> 00:56:00,378
Well, what do you do? I mean,
I can't quit. Their insurance is amazing.
790
00:56:00,461 --> 00:56:02,919
What do you do?
You laugh, you know?
791
00:56:03,003 --> 00:56:07,544
I'm not saying I don't cry.
But in-between, I laugh.
792
00:56:07,628 --> 00:56:10,711
And I realize how silly it is
to take anything too seriously.
793
00:56:12,461 --> 00:56:15,586
Plus, I look forward
to a good cry.
794
00:56:15,669 --> 00:56:17,586
Feels pretty good.
795
00:56:19,503 --> 00:56:22,753
I haven't cried since
I was a little kid.
796
00:56:22,878 --> 00:56:27,003
I didn't cry at my mother's funeral.
I tried, you know?
797
00:56:27,128 --> 00:56:29,253
I thought of all the saddest
things I could think of.
798
00:56:29,378 --> 00:56:33,169
Like, things in movies, this...
799
00:56:33,294 --> 00:56:35,628
There's this image from Life magazine
that's always haunted me.
800
00:56:35,711 --> 00:56:38,253
I just focused in on it,
you know?
801
00:56:38,378 --> 00:56:41,086
But nothing came.
802
00:56:41,169 --> 00:56:43,128
That actually made me
sadder than anything...
803
00:56:43,211 --> 00:56:45,669
the fact that
I just felt so numb.
804
00:56:45,794 --> 00:56:48,461
- What do you mean?
- Just that...
805
00:56:48,586 --> 00:56:51,669
Hey, Vagina!
806
00:56:51,794 --> 00:56:56,961
Hey, what's up, guys? Uh, Sam,
that's Mark, Dave and you rememberJesse.
807
00:56:57,086 --> 00:56:59,086
- Hey.
- What's up?
808
00:56:59,169 --> 00:57:02,169
Hey, nice to meet you. I'm sorry
I said "vagina"just now.
809
00:57:02,294 --> 00:57:04,419
- I didn't know you were here.
- Oh, that's okay.
810
00:57:04,503 --> 00:57:09,253
- Nice. Let's get fucked up.
811
00:57:10,503 --> 00:57:14,586
One, two, three! Whoo!
812
00:57:20,336 --> 00:57:24,003
- What are you doing?
- Largeman, get the fuck in the pool!
813
00:57:24,128 --> 00:57:26,503
- It's so warm!
814
00:57:26,628 --> 00:57:29,003
Can't you swim?
815
00:57:29,128 --> 00:57:31,169
Of course I can swim.
816
00:57:49,378 --> 00:57:52,461
Dude, maybe you should stay on the steps.
I don't know C.P.R.
817
00:57:53,669 --> 00:57:57,211
- You look like a wet beaver.
818
00:58:11,461 --> 00:58:14,794
There's a handful
of normal kid things I kind of missed.
819
00:58:14,878 --> 00:58:18,628
There's a handful of normal
kid things I kind of wish I'd missed.
820
00:58:20,461 --> 00:58:24,086
You know that point in your life when
you realize the house you grew up in...
821
00:58:24,211 --> 00:58:26,128
isn't really
your home anymore.
822
00:58:26,211 --> 00:58:29,836
All of a sudden, even though you have
some place where you put your shit...
823
00:58:29,961 --> 00:58:32,419
that idea of home is gone.
824
00:58:34,794 --> 00:58:38,044
I still feel at home
in my house.
825
00:58:38,128 --> 00:58:42,628
You'll see one day when you move out.
Just sorta happens one day, and it's gone.
826
00:58:42,753 --> 00:58:46,294
You feel like you
can never get it back.
827
00:58:46,419 --> 00:58:49,253
It's like you feel homesick
for a place that doesn't even exist.
828
00:58:52,461 --> 00:58:54,961
Maybe it's like
this rite of passage, you know?
829
00:58:55,086 --> 00:58:58,794
You won't ever have that feeling again until
you create a new idea of home for yourself.
830
00:58:58,919 --> 00:59:02,086
You know, for... For your kids.
For the family you start.
831
00:59:02,211 --> 00:59:04,669
It's like a cycle
or something.
832
00:59:06,419 --> 00:59:09,336
I don't know. But I miss
the idea of it, you know?
833
00:59:12,920 --> 00:59:16,420
Maybe that's all
family really is.
834
00:59:16,545 --> 00:59:19,753
A group of people that miss
the same imaginary place.
835
00:59:30,295 --> 00:59:32,253
Maybe.
836
00:59:44,586 --> 00:59:47,086
How about some
fuckin' furniture, dude?
837
00:59:47,170 --> 00:59:49,753
I bought a chair,
but I didn't like it.
838
00:59:49,836 --> 00:59:51,920
- Where is it?
- It's keeping us warm.
839
01:00:01,003 --> 01:00:04,503
- Silent Velcro.
840
01:00:05,670 --> 01:00:08,211
- You lucky motherfucker.
841
01:00:08,295 --> 01:00:11,836
I feel like if I had showed up at school
and presented the idea of silent Velcro...
842
01:00:11,961 --> 01:00:14,295
they would have sent me away
a whole lot sooner.
843
01:00:14,420 --> 01:00:18,003
- Why did they send you away?
- Oh. Listen to this girl.
844
01:00:18,128 --> 01:00:21,295
- They didn't "send me away."
- You just said they sent you away.
845
01:00:21,420 --> 01:00:23,753
I mean, they sent me away.
They sent me to boarding school.
846
01:00:23,836 --> 01:00:26,295
"Sent me away" sounds like
I went to some asylum or something.
847
01:00:26,378 --> 01:00:30,003
- There were no straps involved.
- Why did they send you to boarding school?
848
01:00:31,461 --> 01:00:33,670
They sent me to
boarding school because...
849
01:00:33,795 --> 01:00:36,003
they thought
I might be dangerous.
850
01:00:37,586 --> 01:00:39,878
"Oh, are you freaked out?
You're like running for the door.
851
01:00:39,961 --> 01:00:42,253
- You can go. It's okay. Don't feel bad."
- That's really funny.
852
01:00:42,378 --> 01:00:44,836
- It's really funny.
853
01:00:44,961 --> 01:00:46,836
Why would they think
you'd be dangerous?
854
01:00:46,961 --> 01:00:49,503
You're like
a little detective.
855
01:00:49,628 --> 01:00:51,420
- Want to know?
- Yeah.
856
01:00:51,503 --> 01:00:54,378
- You're gay.
857
01:00:54,461 --> 01:00:57,545
No. Drumroll.
858
01:01:03,503 --> 01:01:05,920
I was the reason
she was in a wheelchair.
859
01:01:07,003 --> 01:01:08,961
I pushed her.
860
01:01:10,336 --> 01:01:12,461
So there that is.
861
01:01:14,753 --> 01:01:17,003
- Shut up!
- Fuck off.
862
01:01:17,128 --> 01:01:20,336
- No. That's the truth.
- Why?
863
01:01:20,461 --> 01:01:22,628
It was just a complete
freak accident, you know?
864
01:01:22,753 --> 01:01:25,920
It's one of those things you replay
a million times in your head...
865
01:01:26,045 --> 01:01:29,753
and you see how clearly it was
just a complete freak thing.
866
01:01:29,878 --> 01:01:32,920
My-My whole life, she was
depressed for no reason.
867
01:01:33,045 --> 01:01:35,086
And... one day,
you know...
868
01:01:35,170 --> 01:01:37,503
I was a little kid.
I was nine years old...
869
01:01:37,628 --> 01:01:40,420
and I just
hated her for that.
870
01:01:40,503 --> 01:01:42,961
And... I pushed her.
871
01:01:43,086 --> 01:01:45,461
And it was innocent.
I was just completely frustrated.
872
01:01:45,586 --> 01:01:47,628
- 'Cause...
- 'Cause you couldn't make her happy?
873
01:01:47,753 --> 01:01:51,128
Yeah! Fuck, yeah!
And any other time, you know...
874
01:01:51,211 --> 01:01:54,836
any other day, she would havejust
yelled at me and sent me to my room.
875
01:01:54,961 --> 01:01:57,586
But this day...
876
01:01:57,711 --> 01:02:00,295
on this particular day...
877
01:02:00,420 --> 01:02:04,253
the door of the dishwasher...
878
01:02:04,336 --> 01:02:06,836
had fallen open...
the latch on it was broken.
879
01:02:06,961 --> 01:02:09,253
And it would just
randomly fall open.
880
01:02:09,336 --> 01:02:12,086
That fuckin' latch,
you know.
881
01:02:12,211 --> 01:02:17,003
It's really amazing how much of my life has been
determined by a quarter-inch piece of plastic.
882
01:02:17,128 --> 01:02:19,003
But...
883
01:02:19,128 --> 01:02:21,836
So, anyway, she, uh...
she fell back over the door...
884
01:02:21,961 --> 01:02:26,378
and, uh, hit her neck on the kitchen counter,
paralyzing her from the waist down.
885
01:02:28,795 --> 01:02:32,253
- Wow.
- Still want to compare fucked-up families?
886
01:02:32,336 --> 01:02:34,961
But your mom was in the wheelchair
long before you left.
887
01:02:35,086 --> 01:02:38,086
Yeah. Well, I was nine.
888
01:02:38,170 --> 01:02:41,211
So they sent me to therapy
and put me on these drugs...
889
01:02:41,295 --> 01:02:43,420
that were supposed to
"curb my anger,"
890
01:02:43,503 --> 01:02:46,420
and I've been on some
form of them ever since.
891
01:02:46,503 --> 01:02:51,086
And when I was 16, my psychiatrist dad
came around to the conclusion that...
892
01:02:51,211 --> 01:02:54,920
it probably wasn't the best environment
for me to be growing up in, so...
893
01:02:55,045 --> 01:02:57,086
he sent me to boarding school.
894
01:02:57,211 --> 01:02:59,711
- And I haven't been home since.
- Until now.
895
01:02:59,795 --> 01:03:03,420
- For her funeral.
- Till now for her funeral.
896
01:03:05,628 --> 01:03:08,128
I can't believe the retarded
quarterback's a pill-popper.
897
01:03:10,420 --> 01:03:12,336
- Jesse?
898
01:03:12,461 --> 01:03:15,253
Where's the sauna?
899
01:03:15,336 --> 01:03:17,836
- I'll show her.
- No, l-I got it.
900
01:03:17,961 --> 01:03:20,211
- No, you get her a towel.
- Wait. Wait.
901
01:03:23,336 --> 01:03:26,086
Want a ride, sweetheart?
902
01:03:37,795 --> 01:03:39,961
You're in it
right now, aren't you?
903
01:03:40,086 --> 01:03:43,253
- What do you mean?
- My mom always says that when she can see...
904
01:03:43,336 --> 01:03:46,961
I'm, like, working something out in my head,
she's like, "You're in it right now."
905
01:03:47,086 --> 01:03:49,295
And I'm lookin' at you,
and you're...
906
01:03:49,420 --> 01:03:52,336
telling me
that story, and...
907
01:03:52,461 --> 01:03:54,586
you're definitely
in it right now.
908
01:03:55,961 --> 01:03:58,378
I think you're right.
I am in it.
909
01:04:01,295 --> 01:04:04,378
Okay. I mean, whatever. All right.
Can we just change the subject, okay?
910
01:04:04,461 --> 01:04:07,253
Let's just... Let's just
talk about good stuff.
911
01:04:07,336 --> 01:04:12,920
- Good stuff?
- Yeah, like "glass half-full" shit.
912
01:04:13,003 --> 01:04:16,836
- What do you got?
- Got a little buzz. Got that.
913
01:04:18,295 --> 01:04:20,545
- What you got?
- I got a little buzz goin'
914
01:04:24,170 --> 01:04:26,128
And I like you.
915
01:04:33,670 --> 01:04:37,670
So there's that.
I guess I have that.
916
01:04:43,795 --> 01:04:46,211
I can tap-dance.
You want to see me tap-dance?
917
01:04:46,295 --> 01:04:48,503
I would love
to see you tap-dance.
918
01:06:12,628 --> 01:06:17,212
- What are you doing?
- You collect Desert Storm trading cards?
919
01:06:17,295 --> 01:06:19,837
Fuck yeah. Those things
are collector's items, man.
920
01:06:19,962 --> 01:06:22,670
You have any idea how much
those things are gonna be worth one day?
921
01:06:22,795 --> 01:06:25,420
- Really?
- Hell, yeah. That's just like an investment.
922
01:06:25,503 --> 01:06:27,462
I have lots of little investments
all over the place.
923
01:06:27,587 --> 01:06:30,503
One day I'm gonna sell all of'em
just fuckin' live off of it.
924
01:06:31,795 --> 01:06:33,795
So, like how much
is this one worth?
925
01:06:33,920 --> 01:06:38,087
- Which?
- "Night Vision Goggles."
926
01:06:38,212 --> 01:06:41,378
I don't know. Mint?
Uh, two, maybe three.
927
01:06:41,462 --> 01:06:43,545
- Dollars?
- Yeah.
928
01:06:43,628 --> 01:06:47,003
It's too early. You don't sell 'em yet.
Don't you know anything about investing?
929
01:06:47,128 --> 01:06:49,128
I'm gonna
live off that shit.
930
01:06:49,253 --> 01:06:51,795
If you have a complete set,
it's worth, like, thousands.
931
01:06:51,920 --> 01:06:55,545
- So do you have the complete set?
- Almost.
932
01:06:55,628 --> 01:06:59,253
The corners are bent on my "Friendly Fire,"
and someone stole my "Wolf Blitzer."
933
01:07:05,962 --> 01:07:08,962
Now, look.
Whaddya got to do today? 'Cause, uh...
934
01:07:09,087 --> 01:07:11,128
I got you a little
going-away present...
935
01:07:11,253 --> 01:07:15,670
but, uh, I gotta kind of
track it down first.
936
01:07:15,795 --> 01:07:20,295
- So can you give me a ride?
- Uh, yeah. I just, uh...
937
01:07:20,420 --> 01:07:24,712
- What?
- No, nothin'. I just, uh...
938
01:07:24,795 --> 01:07:27,295
Say it. Speak.
939
01:07:29,795 --> 01:07:32,628
I kinda told Sam I was gonna
hang out with her today.
940
01:07:32,753 --> 01:07:35,795
- So, uh...
- She can come. I don't care.
941
01:08:38,962 --> 01:08:40,962
I can't believe we're in
fucking Handi-World.
942
01:08:41,045 --> 01:08:42,962
I really don't want
to be in Handi-World.
943
01:08:43,045 --> 01:08:45,628
We're getting money
for your present. Don't look so guilty.
944
01:08:45,753 --> 01:08:48,753
- How do I look guilty?
- Andrew Largeman?
945
01:08:48,878 --> 01:08:50,795
- Oh, no. Benson.
- Oh, no.
946
01:08:50,920 --> 01:08:52,878
- Who is that?
- Just don't give him your number.
947
01:08:52,962 --> 01:08:55,087
Hey, man. What's up?
948
01:08:55,212 --> 01:08:57,128
- Holy shit!
- How's it goin'?
949
01:08:57,212 --> 01:09:00,170
- I haven't seen you since, like, junior year.
- Yeah.
950
01:09:00,295 --> 01:09:04,087
- I thought you killed yourself.
- What?
951
01:09:05,212 --> 01:09:07,128
I thought
you killed yourself.
952
01:09:07,253 --> 01:09:10,753
- That wasn't you?
- No, no. That wasn't me.
953
01:09:10,837 --> 01:09:14,337
- Who killed themselves?
- That was the Gleason kid.
954
01:09:14,462 --> 01:09:16,003
- Oh.
- Oh, and Tina.
955
01:09:16,128 --> 01:09:18,087
- Tina who?
- You remember Tina.
956
01:09:18,170 --> 01:09:20,962
- She was anorexic, did gymnastics...
- Oh, gymnastics Tina?
957
01:09:21,087 --> 01:09:24,170
- How'd she do it?
- I don't know. She wasn'tJewish. I didn't bury her.
958
01:09:24,295 --> 01:09:28,670
I think it was sleeping pills.
Or that car in the garage thing. I forgot.
959
01:09:31,712 --> 01:09:34,337
- Uh, sorry, this is Sam, Karl. Karl, Sam?
- Hey.
960
01:09:34,462 --> 01:09:36,837
- Hey.
- I gotta go find that thing.
961
01:09:36,962 --> 01:09:40,337
- Uh, you two stay here. I'll be right back.
- Is it heavy, or... Okay.
962
01:09:40,462 --> 01:09:44,753
- Hey, weren't you on a TV show or something?
- Yeah, it was just this show.
963
01:09:44,878 --> 01:09:47,087
So, uh, you're like
workin' here. That's cool.
964
01:09:47,170 --> 01:09:50,378
Only for a little while.
I'm opening my own business.
965
01:09:50,462 --> 01:09:52,462
Actually, I should
talk to you about it.
966
01:09:52,587 --> 01:09:55,337
I'm lookin' for smart people
like you, Large.
967
01:09:55,462 --> 01:09:59,795
- I should get your number.
- Yeah, definitely. That'd be... That'd be cool.
968
01:09:59,920 --> 01:10:02,378
I'd like to talk
to you... both...
969
01:10:02,462 --> 01:10:07,420
about a good opportunity
for you and your loved ones.
970
01:10:07,545 --> 01:10:09,670
We all have dreams.
I know I do!
971
01:10:09,795 --> 01:10:14,045
I'd like to talk to you about an exciting
opportunity that people are talking about.
972
01:10:14,128 --> 01:10:17,253
- We gotta get goin'.
- Oh, okay. It was good to see you, Karl.
973
01:10:17,378 --> 01:10:19,295
- Hey, I should get your number.
- Yeah, definitely.
974
01:10:19,378 --> 01:10:22,212
Well, I'll call you because
I think he has it in his book.
975
01:10:22,295 --> 01:10:24,212
Nice to meet you.
976
01:10:24,295 --> 01:10:27,170
Why is it always the losers that get
caught up in the pyramid schemes?
977
01:10:27,295 --> 01:10:30,628
Why can't it be some charming, hot girl
nagging you incessantly to buy some shit?
978
01:10:30,753 --> 01:10:34,170
- Is that what he's doin'?
- Yeah. It's detergent or some shit.
979
01:10:34,295 --> 01:10:37,337
Why are you buying knives?
I don't need knives.
980
01:10:37,462 --> 01:10:40,295
- I'd like to return these.
- You got a receipt?
981
01:10:40,420 --> 01:10:44,503
- Actually, no. They're a gift.
- Why are you returning these?
982
01:10:44,628 --> 01:10:47,837
- They're not sharp enough.
- They're not sharp enough?
983
01:10:47,962 --> 01:10:50,295
No. Not for what
we need them for.
984
01:10:50,420 --> 01:10:54,337
- They couldn't cut cans.
- You bought them to cut cans?
985
01:10:54,462 --> 01:10:57,753
No, but in the commercial,
it said if I wanted to cut cans, I could.
986
01:10:57,878 --> 01:11:00,795
- With these knives, I can't.
- It comes with a sharpener.
987
01:11:00,920 --> 01:11:05,962
- Did you try it?
- Yeah. They're just...
988
01:11:06,087 --> 01:11:09,545
- I don't want them. They're not sharp enough.
- Okay.
989
01:11:12,962 --> 01:11:16,337
A major loophole in the Handi-World
return policy is that they permit returns...
990
01:11:16,462 --> 01:11:19,378
without receipts
on items below $40.
991
01:11:19,462 --> 01:11:21,503
So, how often do you go?
992
01:11:21,628 --> 01:11:25,337
I hit every employee once,
and then I wait until they hire new ones.
993
01:11:25,462 --> 01:11:27,712
Luckily, nobody stays at
Handi-World for very long.
994
01:11:27,795 --> 01:11:31,087
- Except for Karl Benson.
- You know, Mark, it's my last day in town.
995
01:11:31,212 --> 01:11:33,878
- If you need money, I could loan you some.
- I don't need your money.
996
01:11:33,962 --> 01:11:37,128
- I'm making my own right now.
- Fuck, take Jesse's. The guy's a millionaire.
997
01:11:37,253 --> 01:11:39,587
I don't take anybody's money.
Okay, Andrew?
998
01:11:39,670 --> 01:11:41,753
I make my own.
Favors are bad news.
999
01:11:41,837 --> 01:11:45,212
The only thing worse than a favor
is a favor involving money. Okay?
1000
01:11:46,837 --> 01:11:49,878
Let's go. I gotta see
a guy about a nitrous tank.
1001
01:12:32,462 --> 01:12:36,337
- What is this place?
1002
01:12:36,462 --> 01:12:38,962
I think you can see
into the hotel rooms.
1003
01:12:47,670 --> 01:12:51,628
Oh, yeah!
Ohh! Ohh! Yeah!
1004
01:13:07,129 --> 01:13:09,295
I'm gonna fuckin' cum!
1005
01:13:12,837 --> 01:13:15,295
That shit was hot.
That shit was hot.
1006
01:13:15,379 --> 01:13:17,920
I gotta go drop some knowledge
on that ho right there.
1007
01:13:18,004 --> 01:13:20,587
How do you know
she's a hooker?
1008
01:13:20,712 --> 01:13:22,837
Of course she's
a fuckin' hooker.
1009
01:13:22,962 --> 01:13:25,920
Girls who look like her do not
fuck guys that look like him...
1010
01:13:26,045 --> 01:13:28,295
unless it's for
coke, money or fame.
1011
01:13:28,420 --> 01:13:31,504
Well, Julia Roberts
married Lyle Lovett.
1012
01:13:31,629 --> 01:13:35,045
- Who the fuck are you?
- This is Sam. This is Large.
1013
01:13:35,129 --> 01:13:38,420
No offense, man. But why are you
bringing these fuckin' people here?
1014
01:13:38,504 --> 01:13:41,337
This is the guy who
needs that thing. Wait.
1015
01:13:41,462 --> 01:13:44,420
I brought you
the tank. Okay?
1016
01:13:44,545 --> 01:13:48,087
- Could you just tell us where to go now?
- That thing come with balloons?
1017
01:13:48,212 --> 01:13:51,295
What am I, a fuckin' birthday clown?
No. It doesn't come with balloons.
1018
01:13:51,420 --> 01:13:54,170
Suck it off the tap. And I need
it back when you're done...
1019
01:13:54,295 --> 01:13:56,504
- because that guy's holdin' my 39 bucks.
- All right.
1020
01:13:56,629 --> 01:13:58,504
Hold up. Hold up!
1021
01:13:58,629 --> 01:14:00,962
Who here just
saw some titties?
1022
01:14:01,087 --> 01:14:05,754
Raise you hand if you
just saw some titties. Hmm?
1023
01:14:09,337 --> 01:14:12,420
Thank you! So everybody
just calm the fuck down!
1024
01:14:13,795 --> 01:14:17,212
Now. You know where
Kiernan's Quarry is?
1025
01:14:17,295 --> 01:14:20,004
- Down in Newark, right?
- Yeah.
1026
01:14:20,129 --> 01:14:22,212
It's at the bottom of
Hillside and Rivington.
1027
01:14:22,295 --> 01:14:24,754
You can't really see it
from the street, but it's there.
1028
01:14:24,837 --> 01:14:27,670
Park your car at the gate
and hop the fence.
1029
01:14:27,795 --> 01:14:32,379
At the bottom of the quarry, there's this
junkyard run by this guy named... Albert.
1030
01:14:32,462 --> 01:14:35,545
He's the one that tracked down
the piece you're lookin'for. All right?
1031
01:14:35,629 --> 01:14:38,129
I'll call him right now
and tell him to expect you.
1032
01:14:38,254 --> 01:14:41,212
Okay, stop. What
the fuck are we doin'?
1033
01:14:41,295 --> 01:14:43,420
- Just be patient, man.
- We've been patient all day...
1034
01:14:43,504 --> 01:14:45,837
but it's my last day and you haven't
told us what we're doin'.
1035
01:14:45,962 --> 01:14:48,629
If you told me we were going on a six-hour hunt
for blow, I would've passed.
1036
01:14:48,754 --> 01:14:52,879
If I was gonna get you coke, we would've gone
to the fuckin' high school football practice.
1037
01:14:52,962 --> 01:14:55,129
We would have been
rolling five hours ago.
1038
01:14:55,254 --> 01:14:57,212
I think we corrupted
this innocent girl enough.
1039
01:14:57,295 --> 01:15:00,629
- I'm not innocent!
- Yes, you are! All right?
That's what I like about you.
1040
01:15:00,754 --> 01:15:03,629
I don't want this guy taking you to,
like, some sketchy quarry...
1041
01:15:03,754 --> 01:15:06,712
in the middle of nowhere to find, like,
crack whores huffing turpentine...
1042
01:15:06,795 --> 01:15:10,379
or pit bulls raping each other
or whatever it is you have us doing!
1043
01:15:11,795 --> 01:15:15,504
Wow. That's like the most
worked-up I've ever seen you.
1044
01:15:15,629 --> 01:15:19,212
- He was protecting me.
- So?
1045
01:15:19,295 --> 01:15:22,462
- He likes me.
- Don't be cute.
1046
01:15:22,587 --> 01:15:24,879
He's my knight
in shining armor.
1047
01:15:24,962 --> 01:15:28,295
Don't talk about knights in front of Mark.
It's a sore subject.
1048
01:15:30,254 --> 01:15:33,879
- I'm gonna kill that motherfucker.
- Pun intended?
1049
01:15:33,962 --> 01:15:36,754
- Oh, you're fuckin'...
1050
01:15:39,504 --> 01:15:42,087
Oh, oh, oh, oh!
1051
01:15:42,170 --> 01:15:44,129
Ow! Ow!
1052
01:15:46,254 --> 01:15:48,629
- Oh, my God.
- Wow!
1053
01:15:48,712 --> 01:15:50,670
I never even knew
this was here.
1054
01:15:50,795 --> 01:15:53,837
I've heard about it. They were
supposed to build a mall here, I think.
1055
01:15:53,962 --> 01:15:57,462
Yeah. I remember reading about that
in the paper, that they were...
1056
01:15:57,587 --> 01:16:00,420
digging or something, and they break
into this natural phenomenon.
1057
01:16:00,504 --> 01:16:02,879
It's like an underground
Grand Canyon or something.
1058
01:16:02,962 --> 01:16:06,379
Now they're in some huge legal battle
over whether they can build here or not.
1059
01:16:06,462 --> 01:16:10,462
Can you imagine the guy whose job it is
to fight for his right to build a mall...
1060
01:16:10,587 --> 01:16:12,837
- on some, like, geological phenomenon?
1061
01:16:12,962 --> 01:16:15,962
They love their
malls here, man.
1062
01:16:16,087 --> 01:16:18,545
All right. Let's find
this guy and get out of here.
1063
01:16:18,629 --> 01:16:22,212
- You're not gonna tell us what we're getting?
- It's a surprise. You'll see.
1064
01:16:22,295 --> 01:16:25,045
- I think it's gonna rain.
1065
01:16:29,795 --> 01:16:33,337
So this is it.
1066
01:16:33,462 --> 01:16:38,587
So knock! Knock and barter
for Desert Storm trading cards.
1067
01:16:38,670 --> 01:16:42,254
Don't tease me about my hobbies.
I don't tease you about being an asshole.
1068
01:16:44,295 --> 01:16:46,379
Okay!
1069
01:16:57,795 --> 01:16:59,754
- Mark?
- Yeah. Albert?
1070
01:17:00,920 --> 01:17:02,962
Come on in.
1071
01:17:06,587 --> 01:17:10,170
Oh, man. You guys
must be freezing.
1072
01:17:10,295 --> 01:17:13,420
Make yourselves warm by the fire.
I'm just gonna go put her down.
1073
01:17:13,545 --> 01:17:15,587
Okay? I'll be
right back out.
1074
01:17:21,545 --> 01:17:25,587
Ah, I must say, I'm continually impressed
with how each place you bring us...
1075
01:17:25,712 --> 01:17:29,045
- continues to be weirder and weirder.
- What do you mean? This is nice.
1076
01:17:29,129 --> 01:17:32,962
Oh, nothing. Just hangin' out on an old boat
at the bottom of a quarry in Newark.
1077
01:17:33,087 --> 01:17:35,212
It's hardly
the bottom, dude.
1078
01:17:35,295 --> 01:17:37,295
Did you check out
that cliff down there?
1079
01:17:37,379 --> 01:17:41,212
Hey! This is my wife, Faye.
1080
01:17:41,295 --> 01:17:43,754
Hi! Welcome.
1081
01:17:43,837 --> 01:17:46,920
Please. Have a seat.
Make yourselves comfortable.
1082
01:17:50,295 --> 01:17:52,837
Man, it's really
comin' down out there.
1083
01:17:52,962 --> 01:17:54,962
- It just started pouring all of a sudden.
- Well...
1084
01:17:55,087 --> 01:17:59,420
in a bad storm, I like to pretend that
this old boat's my own private ark.
1085
01:17:59,504 --> 01:18:02,587
Um, unfortunately,
if this is the apocalypse...
1086
01:18:02,670 --> 01:18:05,754
- I'm not quite sure it still floats.
- Yeah, I don't know.
1087
01:18:05,837 --> 01:18:09,504
- Listen, would anybody like some tea?
- I'd love some. Thank you.
1088
01:18:09,629 --> 01:18:12,545
- Do you want some? I'll be right back.
1089
01:18:13,962 --> 01:18:16,795
What is this place?
What is it that you do down here?
1090
01:18:16,920 --> 01:18:18,920
Well, we're calling it
Kiernan's Fault. It's, uh...
1091
01:18:19,004 --> 01:18:22,004
No one really knows what it is because
we haven't been able to explore it.
1092
01:18:22,129 --> 01:18:25,004
Meanwhile, while they're locked
in litigation, they hired me...
1093
01:18:25,129 --> 01:18:28,712
- to make sure no one comes inside.
- Wow.
1094
01:18:28,795 --> 01:18:32,629
But what they don't know is
that at night I climb down.
1095
01:18:32,754 --> 01:18:35,545
So, how deep does it go?
Thank you.
1096
01:18:35,629 --> 01:18:38,170
You know... Thank you.
No one really knows.
1097
01:18:38,295 --> 01:18:41,129
But I like to pretend
it's infinite.
1098
01:18:41,254 --> 01:18:43,920
It's kind of an odd job.
1099
01:18:44,004 --> 01:18:48,129
- Guardian of an infinite abyss.
- Yeah. Yeah, I guess it is.
1100
01:18:48,254 --> 01:18:50,712
But we also trade and deal
in antique jewelry.
1101
01:18:52,087 --> 01:18:56,004
I suppose it is odd that
we live down here like this.
1102
01:18:56,129 --> 01:18:59,004
- No.
- Not at all.
- Never crossed my mind.
1103
01:18:59,129 --> 01:19:02,462
Well, we think it's important.
1104
01:19:02,587 --> 01:19:06,670
Why? What is it that you
think you're gonna find?
1105
01:19:06,795 --> 01:19:09,420
I guess I just like the idea
of discovering something.
1106
01:19:09,504 --> 01:19:12,754
Of doing something
that's completely unique...
1107
01:19:12,837 --> 01:19:14,837
that's never
been done before.
1108
01:19:14,962 --> 01:19:18,004
- "Albert's Abyss."
- Well, maybe. Who knows?
1109
01:19:18,129 --> 01:19:21,545
But, you know what?
That's all ego.
1110
01:19:21,629 --> 01:19:25,420
None of that really matters. If I get to be
with this person right here...
1111
01:19:25,504 --> 01:19:28,295
and our beautiful baby...
1112
01:19:29,379 --> 01:19:31,337
that's all I need.
1113
01:19:35,962 --> 01:19:39,587
Well, I suppose you want
what you came all the way down here for.
1114
01:19:39,670 --> 01:19:41,629
Oh, yeah.
That'd be great.
1115
01:19:41,754 --> 01:19:44,337
It took me a while
to track this piece down...
1116
01:19:44,462 --> 01:19:46,754
but I owed Diego huge.
1117
01:19:49,295 --> 01:19:51,170
That's it.
Thank you so much.
1118
01:19:51,295 --> 01:19:53,920
- Yeah.
- Really.
1119
01:19:54,004 --> 01:19:58,337
Good luck in the rain. Um, do you guys
want some garbage bags or something?
1120
01:20:00,004 --> 01:20:02,420
- Yeah.
- Okay. That'd be great.
1121
01:20:14,837 --> 01:20:16,796
Good-bye!
1122
01:20:17,962 --> 01:20:20,879
- Hey, Albert!
- Yeah?
1123
01:20:22,254 --> 01:20:24,462
Good luck exploring
the infinite abyss.
1124
01:20:24,587 --> 01:20:27,046
Thank you. Hey!
1125
01:20:29,462 --> 01:20:31,671
You too.
1126
01:21:44,462 --> 01:21:47,421
Whoo!
1127
01:22:42,587 --> 01:22:46,962
So, uh, I don't know if
I'm gonna see you, man.
1128
01:22:48,712 --> 01:22:51,171
Don't you want to know
what's in the bag?
1129
01:22:52,587 --> 01:22:55,087
To be honest, I don't even care anymore.
1130
01:23:01,962 --> 01:23:03,921
What is it?
1131
01:23:06,421 --> 01:23:08,837
It's my mom's
favorite necklace.
1132
01:23:08,962 --> 01:23:12,379
I'd be lying to you if I told you
it was my plan all along.
1133
01:23:12,504 --> 01:23:16,087
But... I got it back to you, right?
That's gotta be worth something.
1134
01:23:18,171 --> 01:23:20,296
This whole day
was about this?
1135
01:23:22,546 --> 01:23:24,754
You didn't want it
down there with her.
1136
01:23:24,837 --> 01:23:27,129
It's better it's with you.
1137
01:23:27,254 --> 01:23:28,837
Okay.
1138
01:23:33,004 --> 01:23:36,796
Hey! If you ever need a Kato,
you know where to find me.
1139
01:23:51,629 --> 01:23:54,879
It's funny. This, uh...
1140
01:23:54,962 --> 01:23:58,796
This necklace reminds me of this really
random memory of my mother.
1141
01:24:01,212 --> 01:24:05,254
I was a little kid, and I was cryin'
for one reason or another.
1142
01:24:05,379 --> 01:24:07,337
And, uh...
1143
01:24:10,629 --> 01:24:14,254
She was just like, you know, cradling me
and rocking me back and forth.
1144
01:24:14,337 --> 01:24:18,879
I can remember seeing the little balls
in this thing just floating back and forth.
1145
01:24:18,962 --> 01:24:20,962
And, uh...
1146
01:24:22,837 --> 01:24:26,296
And there was just, like,
snot dripping down my nose, right?
1147
01:24:26,379 --> 01:24:28,837
And, uh...
1148
01:24:28,962 --> 01:24:32,087
She gave me her sleeve...
1149
01:24:32,212 --> 01:24:35,046
and she told me
to blow my nose into it.
1150
01:24:40,546 --> 01:24:44,171
And I remember thinking,
even as a little kid, like...
1151
01:24:44,296 --> 01:24:46,254
"Wow!
1152
01:24:49,796 --> 01:24:52,421
This is love."
1153
01:24:55,379 --> 01:24:57,462
"This is love."
1154
01:24:58,712 --> 01:25:02,212
Large?
I think I see one.
1155
01:25:02,296 --> 01:25:04,796
- Shut up.
- Yeah, I do. Wait. Wait, wait.
1156
01:25:04,921 --> 01:25:07,254
We should save it
or something.
1157
01:25:09,504 --> 01:25:13,504
Okay. Don't move.
Okay.
1158
01:25:17,796 --> 01:25:20,962
We could put it in my scrapbook,
if I had a scrapbook.
1159
01:25:21,087 --> 01:25:25,129
- That it?
- I think so. I don't really feel any more coming.
1160
01:25:26,879 --> 01:25:29,796
Well, if you do, just let me know.
I'll get the cup, okay?
1161
01:25:31,171 --> 01:25:33,546
This was such a good idea.
1162
01:25:33,629 --> 01:25:36,087
- Who are you?
- I'm your new friend Sam.
1163
01:25:36,171 --> 01:25:38,587
- Tissue?
1164
01:25:43,421 --> 01:25:45,879
Come here.
1165
01:25:55,171 --> 01:25:57,546
Fuck, this hurts so much.
1166
01:25:57,629 --> 01:25:59,587
Yeah, I know.
1167
01:26:00,671 --> 01:26:02,629
But that is life.
1168
01:26:04,212 --> 01:26:06,962
If nothing else,
that's life, you know.
1169
01:26:07,087 --> 01:26:11,462
It's real.
Sometimes it fuckin' hurts.
1170
01:26:13,921 --> 01:26:17,254
To be honest,
it's sort of all we have.
1171
01:26:26,046 --> 01:26:28,129
How are you feelin'?
1172
01:26:30,837 --> 01:26:32,796
Safe.
1173
01:26:35,296 --> 01:26:38,087
When I'm with you,
I feel so safe.
1174
01:26:40,379 --> 01:26:42,712
Like I'm home.
1175
01:27:25,463 --> 01:27:28,713
But did not make it.
The driver died on impact.
1176
01:27:28,796 --> 01:27:31,296
- Dad.
1177
01:27:34,004 --> 01:27:36,421
- Come on in.
- I'm sorry I woke you up.
1178
01:27:36,504 --> 01:27:38,463
No, I was just reading.
1179
01:27:39,588 --> 01:27:41,463
Where have you been?
1180
01:27:43,254 --> 01:27:45,129
Everywhere.
1181
01:27:45,254 --> 01:27:48,004
Been on sort of a crazy journey
these last couple days.
1182
01:27:48,129 --> 01:27:50,171
You've been avoiding me.
1183
01:27:50,296 --> 01:27:52,963
No, I haven't been.
Come on.
1184
01:27:54,629 --> 01:27:58,171
Okay, maybe I have been.
1185
01:27:58,296 --> 01:28:03,171
I'm sure you can find
lots of things in your life...
1186
01:28:03,296 --> 01:28:05,171
that you can be
angry about.
1187
01:28:05,296 --> 01:28:09,421
But what I do not understand
is why you're so angry at me.
1188
01:28:09,546 --> 01:28:11,963
All I ever wanted was
for everyone to be happy again.
1189
01:28:12,088 --> 01:28:14,921
- That's all I ever wanted.
- When were we all ever happy, Dad?
1190
01:28:15,004 --> 01:28:16,921
You always say that,
but when was that?
1191
01:28:17,004 --> 01:28:18,963
When was this time
that we were all so happy?
1192
01:28:19,088 --> 01:28:22,838
'Cause I don't have it in my memory.
Maybe if I did, I could help steer us back there.
1193
01:28:22,963 --> 01:28:25,963
But I just...
1194
01:28:26,088 --> 01:28:28,254
You know, you and I need
to work on being okay...
1195
01:28:28,338 --> 01:28:30,254
if that's not
in the cards for us.
1196
01:28:32,879 --> 01:28:35,171
Well, we might
have a shot at it...
1197
01:28:35,296 --> 01:28:37,588
if you can forgive yourself
for what you did.
1198
01:28:39,129 --> 01:28:42,796
What I did.
What I did.
1199
01:28:42,921 --> 01:28:46,046
Okay, let's-let's do it.
Okay, we're here, right? Le-Let's do it!
1200
01:28:46,129 --> 01:28:48,421
I'm gonna forgive myself
for what I did. Are you ready?
1201
01:28:48,504 --> 01:28:52,171
I was a little boy, and
somebody made a shitty latch.
1202
01:28:52,296 --> 01:28:55,338
That's what I think. That's what
I think about the whole thing, okay?
1203
01:28:55,463 --> 01:28:59,004
And I'm not gonna take those drugs anymore.
They left me completely fuckin' numb.
1204
01:28:59,129 --> 01:29:02,754
I have felt so fucking numb to everything
I have experienced in my life, okay?
1205
01:29:02,879 --> 01:29:04,796
And for that...
1206
01:29:05,796 --> 01:29:08,088
For that, I'm here
to forgive you.
1207
01:29:09,963 --> 01:29:13,296
You always said all you wanted was for us
to have whatever it is we wanted.
1208
01:29:13,421 --> 01:29:16,796
Maybe what Mom wanted more than
anything was for it to all be over.
1209
01:29:20,129 --> 01:29:22,046
And for me...
1210
01:29:22,129 --> 01:29:25,838
what I want more than anything in the world
is for it to be okay with you...
1211
01:29:25,963 --> 01:29:27,921
for me to feel
something again.
1212
01:29:28,963 --> 01:29:30,921
Even if it's pain.
1213
01:29:32,838 --> 01:29:35,254
Well, you're going against
your doctor's recommendation.
1214
01:29:35,338 --> 01:29:38,129
That's a pretty weighty experiment
to take on, don't you think?
1215
01:29:43,504 --> 01:29:46,338
This is my life, Dad.
1216
01:29:46,463 --> 01:29:48,421
This is it.
1217
01:29:48,546 --> 01:29:50,713
I spent 26 years waiting for
something else to start.
1218
01:29:50,796 --> 01:29:53,171
So, no, no, I don't think
it's too much to take on...
1219
01:29:53,296 --> 01:29:55,171
because it's
everything there is.
1220
01:29:56,296 --> 01:29:58,338
I see now
it's all there is.
1221
01:30:02,379 --> 01:30:05,296
You and I are going to be okay.
You know that, right?
1222
01:30:11,754 --> 01:30:15,421
We may not be as happy as you always
dreamed we would be, but...
1223
01:30:19,879 --> 01:30:24,588
for the first time, let's just allow ourselves
to be whatever it is we are.
1224
01:30:27,463 --> 01:30:29,421
And that'll be better, okay?
1225
01:30:33,713 --> 01:30:36,421
I think that'll be better.
1226
01:30:56,629 --> 01:30:59,421
What are you thinking about?
1227
01:30:59,546 --> 01:31:02,046
- You're not coming back, are you?
- Come on, Sam.
1228
01:31:02,129 --> 01:31:04,129
- Of course I am.
- No, you're not.
1229
01:31:04,254 --> 01:31:08,046
You don't realize this is good.
This doesn't happen often.
1230
01:31:08,129 --> 01:31:10,129
In your life, you know?
I mean, this...
1231
01:31:11,463 --> 01:31:13,713
We can work
this stuff out.
1232
01:31:13,796 --> 01:31:16,463
I want to help you,
you know?
1233
01:31:16,588 --> 01:31:19,754
We need each other.
I haven't even lied in, like, two days.
1234
01:31:20,963 --> 01:31:23,213
Is that true?
1235
01:31:23,296 --> 01:31:26,046
- No.
1236
01:31:28,588 --> 01:31:30,463
Look, this isn't...
1237
01:31:30,588 --> 01:31:32,963
This isn't a conversation
about this being over.
1238
01:31:33,088 --> 01:31:35,254
It's... It's...
1239
01:31:35,338 --> 01:31:37,796
I'm not puttin' a period
at the end of this, you know?
1240
01:31:37,921 --> 01:31:41,088
I'm puttin', like,
an ellipsis on it.
1241
01:31:41,213 --> 01:31:43,713
Because I'm-I'm worried
that if I don't go figure myself out...
1242
01:31:43,796 --> 01:31:46,088
if I don't go, like,
land on my own two feet...
1243
01:31:46,171 --> 01:31:49,546
then I'm gonna fuck this whole thing up,
and this is too important.
1244
01:31:55,129 --> 01:31:57,213
I gotta go. l...
1245
01:31:57,296 --> 01:32:00,296
Gotta go.
1246
01:32:00,421 --> 01:32:03,254
I fired my psychiatrist.
I gotta go find a new one.
1247
01:32:05,963 --> 01:32:08,171
Look, I'm gonna call you
when I get there.
1248
01:32:10,004 --> 01:32:12,421
I'm gonna call you.
1249
01:32:18,129 --> 01:32:20,296
Look at me.
1250
01:32:22,421 --> 01:32:24,379
Look at me.
1251
01:32:31,838 --> 01:32:34,046
You changed my life.
1252
01:32:40,338 --> 01:32:43,296
You changed my life,
and I've known you four days.
1253
01:32:48,463 --> 01:32:50,921
This is the beginning
of something really big.
1254
01:32:53,463 --> 01:32:55,421
But right now, I gotta go.
1255
01:33:03,088 --> 01:33:05,588
Come here.
1256
01:33:19,796 --> 01:33:21,796
Final boarding call for all...
1257
01:34:20,130 --> 01:34:22,546
Take your seats as quickly as possible.
1258
01:34:33,880 --> 01:34:38,130
- What are you doing?
- Remember that idea I had about
working stuff out on my own...
1259
01:34:38,255 --> 01:34:41,046
- and then finding you once I figured stuff out?
- The ellipsis?
1260
01:34:41,130 --> 01:34:43,796
Yeah. The ellipsis. It's dumb.
It's dumb. It's an awful idea.
1261
01:34:43,921 --> 01:34:47,255
And I'm not gonna do it, okay?
'Cause like you said, this is it.
1262
01:34:47,338 --> 01:34:49,255
This is life...
1263
01:34:49,338 --> 01:34:52,671
and I'm in love
with you, Samantha.
1264
01:34:52,796 --> 01:34:56,213
I think that's the only thing I've ever been
really sure of in my entire life.
1265
01:34:56,296 --> 01:34:59,296
I'm really messed up now,
and I got a lot of stuff I gotta work out.
1266
01:34:59,421 --> 01:35:02,463
But I don't want to waste any more
of my life without you in it, okay?
1267
01:35:02,588 --> 01:35:05,463
- Yeah.
- And I think I can do this! I mean, I want to.
1268
01:35:05,588 --> 01:35:07,213
- We have to, right?
- Yeah!
1269
01:35:07,296 --> 01:35:09,421
- Right?
- Yes!
1270
01:35:11,921 --> 01:35:13,880
So what do we do?
1271
01:35:19,546 --> 01:35:21,671
What do we do?
1272
01:35:22,305 --> 01:35:28,928
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