Original subtitles

- Are you gonna come for me? - Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, my G... Oh, my God.

Hello?

Hey! The gays invited us to Palermo.

What?

We're gonna go on their yacht.

We're gonna spend two nights at Quentin's palazzo.

He said he might even throw me a party.

You're gonna need to bring some cute things.

Do you have any cute things?

Uh, yeah, yeah.

You sure?

Mm-hmm. Yeah, actually.

We're leaving right after breakfast, so...

come on, get over here.

Okay.

Bye.

Harper?

What is this?

You tell me.

Where did you get it from?

I found it yesterday.

Where?

Okay, look, it's not what you think.

I haven't done anything. Okay?

It wasn't me.

It was him. I swear to God.

Uh...

He had sex on the couch?

- In here? - Mm-hmm.

With who?

With these...

with these Italian girls that we met at the bar.

They were... you know, they were hookers.

Yeah.

You met two hookers at the bar, and brought them back

to our room, and Cameron had sex with them on the couch?

I can't remember 'cause, like, I was wasted, but...

What were you doing? Were you just watching?

I was... Honestly, I was just, like... I mean,

I... I... I was just sitting there.

I... I... I wa... I... I was going to bed.

They came in, and then... I mean, I don't know.

I can't remember. I was really out of it.

And you didn't do anything with these hookers?

No. I didn't do any of the sex stuff.

I mean, one of them, like, at one point,

one of them tried to kiss me,

but I freaked out, so nothing happened. I promise.

Okay, look, w... we took Molly...

I mean, I know that sounds bad, but...

Yeah, it sounds really fucking bad.

I was gone for one fucking night,

and you did Molly with hookers?

- Yeah... But... - And I come back and find a condom wrapper on the couch?

- What the fuck? - Yeah, but, look... I swear

to you, I didn't do anything. Okay?

- I'm not lying. - You already have lied to me.

No, I have not. When have I lied to you?

- I haven't lied to you. - Yes, you have!

- When? - I gave you every chance yesterday to tell me

what happened, and you fucking bullshitted me.

Well, I didn't tell you everything, yeah,

- because... - To say the least.

He begged me not to tell anyone, okay?

I don't know. I guess I was worried

that if I told you, then you would talk to Daphne,

and then it would become

- this whole dumb thing. - That was your worry?

I'm sorry. I fucked up. Okay?

I should've talked to you. But...

honestly, I kind of think you should feel good about this.

I mean, I didn't do anything.

All of that was going... Like, under those circumstances,

- and then I didn't do anything? - It just...

it sounds insane. But...

okay.

Don't make a bigger deal out of this than it is. Please.

- Please. - Okay. Okay.

Okay? I didn't do anything. I'm not lying to you.

Okay.

You know I don't lie to you.

Okay.

- Look, I'm sorry. - Mm-hmm.

Okay, I'm going to go.

Can I, uh... Can I see you again?

I, um...

I have to hang out with my family today, but...

I don't know, maybe... maybe tonight?

Yes. Yes, of course.

Okay. All right.

Yeah. That was, um... That was fun. Yeah. It was cool.

- Yeah, cool. - Yeah.

Um...

Do you...

do you have my money?

Money?

It's 2,000 for overnights. Um...

Uh... I'm sorry, for what?

For me.

I'm sorry, I thought you knew it.

I... I had no idea.

It's okay.

It's okay, it's um... It's okay.

No, I just... Sorry, I just... I...

I've never done anything like that...

before. So, I just... I don't know, I just...

- I didn't... I... - You didn't know.

- You didn't know. - I didn't know. Yeah.

It's okay. I had fun.

I like you. You're nice.

You don't have to pay for this.

No. I mean now, I feel bad.

- So... - It's just,

there is a man who will ask me for the money

and, uh, he's crazy, you know?

- Um... - Okay,

I'm gonna go to the... I'll go to the bank. I'll get the money from...

- the bank, I'll... - It's okay. It's okay.

Maybe we can still meet later, or...

You don't want to see me again. I understand.

- No, no, no. I wanna se... - I understand.

I wanna see you again.

Sure, I wanna see you again. For sure.

I do like you.

I like you, too.

- Great. - Great. Okay.

- So... Yeah. - Uh...

I'm sorry. I thought you knew.

No. It's... It's my fault.

Arrivederci.

See you later. Bye.

You know, I talked to Billy Offer

last night about getting the marriage annulled.

How did I not see the signs, Portia?

Do you think I'm oblivious?

No.

You know, sometimes, I think...

I should've started that spa for poor women

with that girl from Maui.

You know, 'cause she was like a real healer.

The real deal. But you know,

sometimes I think those healers are a little witchy.

Hm.

Maybe she put a curse on me.

How was your night? You have fun?

I need to go the bank. I need,

- um... I need to get some euros. - Yeah, sure.

I can give you, uh, 200.

I need more than that.

For what?

For whatever. Something. I don't know. Does it matter?

I need to go to the bank.

What?

Daph's pissed at me.

Yeah, I am.

They had their big night without us. Uncool.

Yeah, so,

I booked a car, so we can head out to Etna.

Check out some of these wineries,

little day-drinking, little wine-tasting.

Apparently, the wine has, like, a bunch

- of volcanic minerals in it. - Yeah. Healthy wine.

So, we can get drunk, and then tomorrow our skin,

and our hair, and our nails will be glowing.

What do you guys think?

Huh?

E?

Yeah, sure.

If it's good with Harper.

Yeah, yeah, why not? Let's get drunk.

Maybe we can find some Molly and really rage.

Hmm.

Oh, no.

Scusi!

No.

No.

No.

Hi.

- Hi. - How are you?

Well.

Uh, have you been charging stuff to my room?

Oh, not much. Just... just little food. Yeah.

- Is it a problem? - No, no. It's not a problem.

You wanna charge a little food, that's fine.

- Thank you. - Uh, maybe, in exchange, um,

you stay away from my son.

Whatever you do, please do not say anything

to him about, you know, you and me. Okay?

Have you been going in my father's room?

No.

No?

Just one time. But we took showers.

Do not go in my father's room. That is not cool.

You wanna hang out here? Uh...

Fine, but we can't create a situation. Okay? Please.

Okay.

- Buona giornata. - Buona giornata a te.

- Oh, my God. Hey. - Hey.

- Hey. - Oh.

Are you, um... are you leaving?

Uh, we're going to Palermo for two nights. Yeah.

Um, but then we're coming back. Yeah.

Hey, I just wanted to say,

I'm sorry for yesterday.

I was planning on hanging out and everything. I just...

you know, couldn't get away, and...

- So... - No. Yeah, that's fine. Um.

Yeah, I saw that you were... busy.

Yeah, I guess...

Busy. And, um, you seemed

like you got a little bit busy yourself.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, well.

Seriously, though, have a... have a nice life.

Yeah, I'll try.

And you too.

- Bye, Portia. - Yeah.

Ciao.

Ciao, Isabella.

Oh. Oh. Grazie.

- Ready, honey? - Yeah.

Guys. Guys.

- Sorry. - Oh.

So, we will start with our Etna Bianco.

Mm.

It is juicy on the palate, and it has notes of plums,

and prickly pears. Oh.

- Oh. - Oh. Oh.

A bit more.

- Cheers, party people. - Cheers.

- Cheers. - La dolce vita!

Cheers.

What's next?

Mm. Yums.

Eh, eh, eh, eh.

Did you knit your little cap?

He doesn't understand English. Or Italian half the time.

The boat is beautiful.

But does it go any faster?

To mm a so! Make it go faster!

He's just gonna show me around downstairs.

Wow. I think your nephew and Portia

- are really hitting it off. - Yes.

- Wow. - I think it's nice for him

to have someone of his own age to play with.

I'm just dying to know. How did you end up in Sicily?

My father moved here in about 1982.

- Oh. - And then when I was about 32,

the silly old sausage died,

leaving me his rather wonderful villa

and its never-ending upkeep.

- And you love it here, right? - Oh, yes.

Come on. Let me show you the bedrooms.

They're very fucking posh.

Hey, Rocco.

Si?

Rocco. Prego.

What was your guys' favorite? I think mine was the Eruzione.

I liked the one in

I think that glass. Which one was that, Cam?

I don't remember, babe. We'll buy a case.

- Okay. - I have a question.

Yeah, what's your question?

Have you two ever slept with the same girl?

- What? - What?

Just curious.

- Where did that come from? - Yeah.

In college, come on.

Be honest.

Well, there wasn't exactly a lot of overlap, you know?

Different dating pools.

Really?

You never invited a girl over to your dorm room?

Played Naked Twister?

Naked Twister?

Come on. You guys never had one orgy?

Just tell us!

- Yeah, Cam... - No.

- Did you have orgies? - No, only in my dreams, honey.

Never a threesome?

- No. - No, not that I recall.

- Right? - Cameron would always sleep

with the girls that I liked, but before I could get to them.

If I ever told him that I liked a girl,

he would swoop in and have sex with them within a week.

- Oh. - Cameron. Rude.

You have a bad case of something called mimetic desire.

If someone with higher status than you wants something,

it means it's more likely that you'll want it, too.

You did not have higher status than me.

Not then, maybe.

I mean, I was smarter than you.

Maybe you thought that fucking women

I had a connection with would make you smarter.

You guys ever watch each other have sex?

- Oh, my God. - Me and E?

- Yeah. - Harper, what is with these questions?

I mean, it was college, right? We didn't have our own room.

So, probably.

So, I guess old habits die hard, huh?

Mm. You guys wanna hit up another winery or what?

Yeah!

Come on, let's go.

Welcome to Palermo.

You've never seen a freak show like this.

- Hey! - Hey.

Where have you been?

Um, he was just giving me a tour of the cabin.

This whole time?

Mm-hmm.

You two have been having sex on the boat.

That's what you've been doing.

No.

I'm jealous.

I'm jealous.

What happened to your head?

I banged it on a corner of a nightstand

looking for the remote. It's just a little scratch.

I'll feel better after a martini.

I think I'm gonna eat lunch at the pool.

Why not with us?

Well, that girl's over there. The girl from last night.

You know, I... I... I don't know how I feel about you

spending a lot of time with those girls, Albie.

Why? What's the problem?

I think because they're escorts.

How do you know?

Well, because...

Because what?

Because I wasn't born yesterday, and it's fairly obvious.

So what if they are?

I mean, you'll sleep with escorts,

- but then you'll judge them? - Who says I sleep with escorts?

I'm sure you've both slept with escorts.

Albie, I... I just don't think your mother would be happy

if she knew I was letting you run around Sicily

with a couple of escorts.

Mom's not happy because you cheat on her

with whoever you can get your hands on.

And it's pretty hypocritical that you would judge them.

I'm not judging them. I'm just looking out for you.

They probably don't wanna be escorts.

They're just poor and victims of a fucked-up system.

Women aren't all saints, Albie. They're just like us.

Have a good lunch.

Where you going?

Dad, what is the matter with you?

I... I mean, you almost just...

- Just what? - You know what.

I'm trying to smooth things over with Albie and with everyone,

and that would,

you know... that would really not be good.

I can't be responsible for everything I say,

I'm concussed.

- I just hit my head. - Yeah.

Oh, my God. Here, here.

I like it.

What the fuck! You told her?

You left a condom wrapper on the fucking couch,

and she found it!

- What? - Yeah!

What was I supposed to do? She thought it was me.

- Are you sure it doesn't... - I think she still does.

- Oh, shit. - No.

How do you miss that?

I don't fucking know, all right? I...

- Cameron! - Sorry. I...

Coming.

- Are you okay? - Wow. Wow. Wow.

Yeah. Strong as an ox.

I'm so sorry about the bag.

- I tried not to over pack. - Nah, you're all right.

It's not a problem.

You got a fucking dead body in here?

Oh, my God.

My God. Are you kidding me?

Look at that pool.

Hey. I mean, these are some high-end gays.

Oh, it's a good feeling when you realize

that someone has money.

'Cause then you don't have to worry about them wanting yours.

- Mm. Must be such a relief. - It is. It is.

God, will you look at this?

Oh, my God. Don't steal anything.

Come in. Come in.

Oh, my God.

You must have dumped a fortune into this place.

- Hey. - You all right?

Oh, yes, a little one. I was hoping to get

some heritage subsidies from the government,

but they said we had to open it to the public.

So... that's not going to happen.

Oh, yeah. You don't want the public in here.

No. The public are not welcome,

but you are. Come. Sit, sit.

Would you like some tea, some Moscato?

I would like a splash of Moscato.

Now...

you know, after hearing the story of your love life,

we decided you were like

a tragic heroine in a Puccini opera.

I told you this.

Yeah, but... Is that a compliment?

- Oh, yes. - It is?

So, we decided it would be very fitting

while you're here if we took you to the opera.

And tonight they're going to show Madame Butterfly,

which will be fantastic.

- Mm. - Would you like that?

- Hm? - Hm?

- To the opera! - All'opera!

The opera? Sounds like a fucking

shit idea. So, I say...

That we... we ditch the gays,

I can show you around town. Get us in trouble.

What do you reckon?

I reckon that sounds great.

- You takin' the piss outta my accent? - Yeah, maybe a little.

All right, fuck these lot. Hm.

- Yes, yes. Maybe. - Oh, yeah.

- Yeah. - Oh, I, uh,

I went to the bank.

I have the money.

Did you like last night?

- Very much. Very much so. - Hmm. So did I.

What about tonight?

Yeah, um...

I... I don't mind paying.

I just... I would feel weird being part of some situation.

Like, if you're being exploited by some guy.

Do... do you know... Do you know what I mean?

Yeah.

Yeah, but, I mean, I don't want money. I like you.

- Yeah? - Yeah. Very much.

Hey!

Isabella?

Ciao, buonasera.

Buonasera.

Ah. E Rocco?

E, Rocco...

Vai.

Wow.

That is absolutely incredible.

Wow.

Can you believe it?

We're finally free, just you and me.

- Do you like arancini? - Arancini. Yeah, totally.

- Nice. - What is it?

It... Fuck's sake.

- It's like a rice ball. - Oh!

- Yeah. - A rice ball!

I love a good rice ball.

Bet you do,

you fuckin' slag.-

Well, the best rice balls are down here.

They're the best in the world.

You're gonna love 'em!

- I sit here? - Yes. Look up.

Look up.

Wow.

Oh, my gosh.

Hey.

Who's the lady?

Is it the Queen of Sicily?

Yes.

Psst. Psst.

Here we go.

Hey, uh, I'm gonna hit the head. I'll see you guys over there.

- Sure. - Okay.

Just... just a second, okay?

- So sorry. - Okay.

Come on.

You can't be giving me looks like that in front of my wife.

I don't care. Where is my money?

I know, okay? Just... just relax, okay?

You're gonna get your money. I've just been busy.

It's 1,300 euros.

Thirteen hundred... It's nothing.

Okay? I just need to go to a bank.

- All right? Just... Relax. - No. Give me your number.

No!

- I want it! I want your number. - No. Jesus Christ.

I'm here with my wife. All right? I can't.

And I can't be talking to you.

- Hey. - Hey.

- Sorry. - Um. Who was that?

Um...

He owes me money.

- He hired you? - Yeah.

And he didn't pay you?

And, um, Alessio is asking me for the money.

Threatening me and...

Is there anything I can do?

No, no. It's not your problem. Really.

- Okay. - Yeah.

You can't really be surprised,

- can you? - By what?

Well, that he's running around with an escort.

What do you mean?

You've normalized it for him.

Right, like you normalized it for me.

Oh, I never ran around with hookers.

I don't run around with hookers either.

Dom. Didn't you run around with that exact hooker?

You gave her the key to my room.

You know the reason I am the way I am is because of you.

You're blaming me

for your situation? That's rich.

Do you think you were so discrete?

Do you? I mean, how many nights did I hear Mom

cry herself to sleep? Get real.

Everybody knew, Dad.

Everybody knew.

- Everybody knew. - We had a great marriage.

Oh, my God. You are deluded.

You made her life hell my entire childhood.

Do you have amnesia?

If I made her life hell,

- why'd she stay with me? - I have no idea.

She didn't know any better. She was a martyr. I don't know.

She loved me.

She was a bitter woman.

And she died a bitter woman,

and she knew about everything you did. Believe me.

You were just too self-involved to even notice that.

Yeah, and you know what, I...

I don't blame you

for my situation, but I sure fucking could.

Because you never...

showed me how to love a woman.

You never... showed me how to be intimate.

You never showed me how to put others first.

You always put yourself first. Always. So I did the same thing.

I loved your mother.

And she loved me.

It's not that simple.

Yes, it is.

- Cheers. - Cheers.

To volcanos, and all the threesomes of past,

and... present, and future.

I feel like you sow your oats when you're young,

and then you just, you know, you get it out of your system.

I don't know.

- Not sure it works like that. - I know, but that's the idea.

Well, it's kinda like food, you know?

You... gorge yourself until you're sick.

You swear you'll never eat another bite, and then...

few days later, you're hungry again.

So, Harper.

You've grilled me and E all day. What about you?

What about me?

You ever had a threesome?

Yes.

- Right? - Mm-hmm.

- Maybe. - Really?

With who?

- Uh, with my friend Paola... - Mmm, Paola?

- Mm-hmm? Oh. - And this guy Oscar.

This was in San Juan.

Were they your cousins or something?

Very funny.

- Yeah. - Okay, okay. How old were you?

Um...

I don't know. I was, um...

I was in college.

Were you a good girl or a bad girl?

I mean, I wasn't...

I wasn't bad, but I had fun...

in college.

In college?

What, not now?

No, I mean it's just hard to... You know, Ethan...

Ethan loves his porn, you know? So, it's just hard to compete

with "Slutty intern gets triple banged..."

"For not listening to her bosses."

Maybe we should slow down on the wine.

No, let's not slow down.

- Let's keep it going, right? - Yeah, fuck it.

- Yeah! Why not? - Right? Why not?

Ah. Camerieri.

Okay.

Let's see what you have. Give it a little twirl. Okay?

Perfecto.

- It's okay? - What's your name?

Luca.

- Luca. - Yes.

- My name is Harper. - Nice to meet you.

Piacere...

Grazie, Valentina. Grazie Mille! Grazie.

Grazie, Valentina.

Grazie!

Grazie, grazie!

Let's go.

I've never eaten so fast in my life.

Seriously, you were right.

That was the...

Best rice ball I've ever had.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

Palermo's amazing. Seriously,

there's, like, so much going on all the time.

I think there's, like, uh, a club somewhere around here.

But, it's a bit early.

They don't really get going until 2:00 A.M. here.

Hm.

Hey!

Oh, keep walking, keep walking,

keep walking.

- Wait, what? - Hey!

- Come on, run, run, run! - What's happening?

Go, go! Get behind that bin there.

Wait, what? What are we doing?

- Okay, get down. Relax. - What's that? What...

- You all right? - Why is he chasing us?

All right.

All right, we're good. We're good, we're good.

Whoo!

Wait, wait, wait, wait. What just happened?

Well, I forgot my wallet.

- I could've paid. - Nah.

- Yeah. - Wouldn't ask you to pay. You're a lady!

How'd you run in them things anyway? I'm impressed.

Ow, yeah. My feet do really freaking hurt.

- Do they? - Yes.

It's all right, I can lick 'em better later if you want.

- Will you? - Give 'em a little massage.

- Yeah? - You like that?

Thank you. Thank you.

Okay. Grazie.

Hi.

Nice.

- Where'd they go? - To find cigars.

Mm.

You okay?

I think something happened.

When we were in Noto.

Like what?

I'm sure whatever happened wasn't a big deal.

And if anything ever did happen, you just...

do what you have to do to make yourself feel better about it.

I have this trainer in the city.

Lawrence. He's so handsome.

He has blonde hair and these, like, big, blue eyes.

He's really funny, too.

I spend more time with him than Cameron sometimes.

'Cause he's so busy at work.

Such a cutie. Wanna see a pic?

This is just a picture of your kids.

Is it? Whoopsie.

We'll find it later. Anyway, the point is...

maybe you should get a trainer.

This is the best gelato

- you can have in Taormina. - Really?

- Yeah. - In just Taormina?

Um, no, I mean, in all of Sicily.

- Mm. Well, I would hope so... - Yeah.

Because it took us, like, an hour to get it, so...

Lucia!

Oh, no.

I'll be right back. Just... just stay here, okay?

Okay. Yeah.

Sorry.

Who is that?

Alessio.

Is everything okay?

I just don't want to talk about it.

Okay.

Poor Madam Butterfly.

Seppuku.

I can relate.

Gore Vidal, who is a friend...

Actually, he used to sleep in the room you're staying in.

He once said, "I can understand companionship."

I can understand bought sex in the afternoon.

"But I cannot understand the love affair."

I'm the same.

You've never been in love?

Ever?

Once, yes.

Before I got wise.

I was young.

- Who was he? - He was an American, actually.

I was... restless, and I'd read too much beat poetry.

And I decided to go bumming around the American West

in the hopes of out-scandalizing my father.

And I met this young cowboy in Wyoming.

- Hm. - And I fell absolutely

head over heels for him.

And of course, he was heterosexual

and completely uninterested,

which only added to the torturous pleasure.

I'd have done anything for him.

And the amazing thing is after 30 odd years, I still would.

Well, whatever happened to him?

Well, he got old.

Which, though unforgivable,

is not strictly-speaking his fault.

No, no.

Other than the cowboy,

love's never been my Achilles heel.

It was always beauty.

Hm. I live for beauty.

I know you do.

I do. Hm.

I'd also die for beauty. Wouldn't you?

Hm.

A world without beauty...

is not a world I want to live in.

Well...

you couldn't ask for a more beautiful world...

than this.

Here's to beauty.

To beauty.

- You want a fag? - Yes.

Oh, that was a wild night, weren't it?

Can't believe you almost got me arrested.

Thought I gave zero fucks, but you give, like,

negative fucks.

- Is that a problem? - No.

Well, you ain't seen nothin' yet.

- I'll be back, yeah? - You're not coming in?

Oh, I gotta go do something for my uncle, but...

keep your door unlocked, yeah?

'Kay.

Hi, this is Abby.

I can't take your call right now,

so leave me a message.