Original subtitles

Previously on The West Wing:

Do you have any interest in leaving the private sector?

Are you offering me a job?

Engaging your interest.

In a White House job.

Don't make me think about it too hard.

No, thanks.

I need Charlie. We're working.

I heard "Brad Pitt." You're not working.

Talk to me about the announcement

for the Family Leave expansion.

Hello. Am I interrupting?

You were in New Hampshire, right?

I was. That's nice.

This country was founded

on the principle of freedom.

Freedom stands opposed to constraints,

and the bigger the government,

the more the constraints.

Wow.

You agree with that?

No, it's a crock,

but you're really cute.

Yeah, I know.

You're too good at this.

You can't just walk away.

Watch me.

Are you sure I can't get you anything?

No, thank you.

And it's my job to insure that?

Pretty much.

Is she...? Go on in.

( door opening )

Is the President ready for his press conference tomorrow?

Unless Congress cooks up more recipes for lame duck.

Sorry about last week's veto override.

I'm more worried about this latest stunt.

Yeah. Today's vote

on stem cell funding.

Where did that come from?

Apparently, the Speaker wasn't thrilled

we found $55 million

in the HHS budget last month

for stem cell research.

Haffley's introducing legislation

that would de-fund our whole program.

"Embryonic" is their favorite fighting word.

Isn't this funding limited to genetic material

that is being thrown away?

Which is why we have enough Republicans to make it close.

A dozen votes could make the difference.

Guess the Speaker saw an opening

with so many Democrats out campaigning.

I'm on it. Been making calls all morning.

20 Democrats are flying back for the vote.

Most have already landed.

In fact, I should be... Go.

The President doesn't need any more bad news

in the next 18 hours.

He needs a good day.

Count on it.

Sorry. Did I miss it?

Got his marching orders.

Then one of those days.

About tonight...?

Nobel Laureates Dinner. Brought my tux.

And dancing shoes? Latin jazz on tap.

For those of us who are seated

with the organometallic chemists

and have run out of small talk by the soup course.

I'm afraid you'll miss the soup.

Why's that?

Future Leaders for Democracy.

Near future, distant future?

Middle. Middle schoolers, in fact.

No, no. Not that.

I'm wall-to-wall today.

These kids are great. They won a commendation

for some Internet voting thing.

Give them ten minutes.

Ten minutes is how my whole day's been divvied up.

There's a plot to ensure

I never get to anything of substance.

They were bumped off the President's schedule yesterday,

bumped from mine this morning.

They're on yours for 6:00.

Why? It's their last day in town.

No. I meant, why me?

'Cause you're so good with kids.

Congressman Santos.

Did I miss it?

Doing the rule right now.

Sorry to cut it so close.

Traffic from Dulles.

Appreciate you interrupting the campaign.

For stem cell? This one matters.

Mm-hmm.

CONGRESSIONAL STAFFER: One more vote! One vote arriving!

Saw the news crews.

If you want to comment after.

Congrats on Arizona and New Mexico.

Keeps us alive.

Super Tuesday's a real gauntlet.

Well, we appreciate this detour.

And you calling back so many others

out stumping for your guy.

Three months of primary potshots.

It's a relief to see the Democrats pulling on the same oar

working together to protect...

Hey. DONNA: Hi.

Thought you were in Atlanta.

White House asked the Vice President to pitch in.

Important one for the President.

Vice President can't vote.

But as a former House member,

he retains lifetime floor privileges.

He's in there now?

Whipping support for the President.

As only a Vice President can do.

No stone unturned.

He's wheels up in an hour, but he'll take questions on his way out.

You arranged the press? DONNA: I did.

That's a nice touch. Unless we don't win this

and have to sneak him out the back.

We have the votes.

Ah, it'd be great.

That's why we're all here.

A win for the President.

Or... not.

Son of a bitch.

What happened?

Nothing to do with democracy.

We can hit the road.

Why? The Speaker saw

just how many Democrats were back in town,

did the math, pulled the vote.

He pulled the vote? Game over.

We've been had.

Can I get you some tea?

No, thank you.

I make a mean cup of ocha.

Perhaps I could proceed on my own.

She won't be much longer.

She'll want the honor of escorting you herself.

( knock at door )

( music playing )

* We have not Begun

* the Beguine...

I can come back.

ABBEY: No, no, stay. Stay.

Jed, you have to use the cane.

Doc said I didn't have to use it at home, right, C.J?

I'm guessing he meant the residence, sir,

not the entire White House.

My home, where I'm having a party tonight with dancing.

You ready to cut a rug?

I'm the product of a ballroom class short on boys.

Tall girls had to lead.

PRESIDENT: Look how well it served you.

You're in rare form today, sir.

He certainly is.

The Speaker withdrew his bill

attacking stem-cell research.

More good news.

They'll reschedule as soon as our guys leave town.

And that could be as soon as when?

Tomorrow in the middle of your press conference.

Still, something can be said for MS.

Good days you don't take for granted.

But tonight, sir...

Nobel laureates.

Some of my favorite people.

I wanted to ask you about Yosh Takahashi.

I assumed you weren't close.

I mean, I know

he's the economist you shared the Nobel with.

Not shared, split.

Ours was not a shared prize

for shared work.

The prize was split.

That year, the Swedes chose to recognize to recognize

two separate-- some would say-- fundamentally divergent,

even contradictory efforts in the same field.

He is a bit conservative.

Ha!

He makes Milton Friedman look middle of the road.

Thank God he's half a globe away and not on the guest list,

so we don't have to think about him tonight.

That's the thing.

Be gentle. I'm not a well man.

Dr. Takahashi was invited.

He's flying in from Kyoto?

He's a visiting scholar

at the University of Chicago this quarter.

He's crashing my party?

He's here now,

waiting to pay his respects.

I got the message

about baby-sitting your student group.

Can't stop. Running late.

Are you sure I'm the right fit?

You're perfect.

I'm stop in at the end to say hello.

But I got to review tapes of the President

for tomorrow's press conference.

Why? You already said the President's announced.

Why mess with perfection?

I did?

Sounds like your schedule is clear.

CLIFF: Look, stay one more day.

Haffley will reschedule this.

Not if we're here.

The Speaker can delay calling a vote

for as long as he wants.

Super Tuesday is coming and I'm in a tight race.

Yeah, so are plenty of Republicans.

Look, give me another day.

Would if I could, but that dog won't hunt.

Well, keep your phones on.

Don't board any flights without talking to me first.

Nice try. Mr. Speaker.

So, uh, Leg Affairs tougher than lobbying or just different?

You are dead meat.

It's a good sign that in year seven

the President can still rally the troops.

This won't affect my serve, you know.

I'm gonna slaughter you tomorrow, straight games.

Save it for the court, dude.

( sighs )

( grunts )

Congressman, tell me you're not leaving town.

I never leave town.

And you have the President's gratitude for your committed service.

To be honest, I have some doubts

about funding stem cell research.

Of course you do.

DONNA: Mm-hmm.

Yeah, I'm going to miss those little peach things.

Bring some to Cleveland for me.

Bye.

Sorry about the vote.

Strike one for stem cells?

Nah. Sometimes

things are going so smoothly,

you don't see it coming till they fall apart.

True.

You look changed...

in a good way.

Congratulations on the job.

May not be mine after today.

But you, onward and upward with Bingo Bob.

Vice President would have stayed

if he thought it would still help.

Oh, thank him for the use of his office.

Are you kidding? If Leg Affairs didn't have this office,

where would you camp out on the Hill?

Guess Josh worked out of here a lot.

( sighing ): Back in the day.

We need to have dinner sometime so you can catch me up.

I'll be back after Super Tuesday.

Good luck on it.

The Kohasa rebels continue to arm conscripts

from refugee camps along the Angola border.

Under this contingency, we would mobilize near Llebo,

where intel reports stocks of munitions and RPGs.

But we're advocating wait and see.

Then we're done for now.

Unless you want an update

on the Canada situation.

Uh, right, Canada.

Go on.

As you know, tensions along the 49th parallel

have been growing.

What's their beef?

Good one.

Yes, our ban on live Canadian cattle exports

is a catalyst, but I wouldn't reduce this

to a simple mad-cow conflict.

I'll avoid that.

Hostilities escalated dramatically

at the start of the spring snow goose hunting season.

Certain Canadian ranchers

posted "No Trespass" signs

on wooded property...

Canadian property?

Yes. But we're their Montana neighbors

that hunted quarry for generations.

Are you from Interior?

Fish and Wildlife, ma'am.

While an American party was setting out decoys

for the Great Snowy Honker this morning,

Canadians surrounded them and pinned them down.

It's unclear whether the Americans are under siege

or have been taken hostage. Hostage?

That's affirm.

And local law enforcement can't...?

Before Canadian officials could respond,

one of the hunters, a retired Montana State Trooper,

called in backup on his cell.

Off-duty officers responded

to the scene, and they infiltrated the 20-yard swath

de-marking the border. Have shots been fired?

Yes, but there were geese in the air at the time.

Do we even have a map of Canada?

PRESIDENT: Dr. Takahashi.

Mr. President.

Dr. Bartlet.

What a lovely surprise.

Thank you for allowing me

to say hello.

I regret that I'm so busy today.

But for an old friend...

These two met in grad school.

And we competed even then.

A fellowship you won,

as I recall. I was always

the bookworm;

he was the politician.

I wasn't.

A tenure track was all I aspired to back then.

But his economics

betrayed his true calling.

C.J.: How so?

President of the Welfare State...

the footnote to explain his theory.

PRESIDENT: We'll have opportunity

for more of this at dinner.

That, sir, would be a rational expectation.

ABBEY: They're setting tea

in the other room. Would you join me?

Well, he's certainly a...

Smug son of a bitch.

"Rational expectation."

What?

Territory he claims to have pioneered.

"Footnote" my ass.

I don't think he was saying...

As if his work would still be read if he hadn't

spent a lifetime assigning it to hapless undergrads.

All due respect, sir,

you sit in this office,

you're pretty much not allowed

to harbor professional jealousies.

He started it.

Congressman. You're still here.

I got held up. I know you've got

that fund raiser tonight in Hartford.

Yeah, I'm on my way now.

Isn't there any chance... Okay. Look unhappy.

You see how I'm shaking my head,

telling you no way?

I do. Are you in fact telling me the opposite?

I'm not sure yet.

Don't smile.

Is it too much if I slump?

Careful.

So where can we talk?

My office, half an hour?

Look, I'm... I'm sorry.

I'm really sorry.

You sure you have the clearance to discuss this?

The Vice President is on his way to Atlanta,

but he wanted me to weigh in.

He has an interest in the situation.

Please, tell me this is a ruse

concocted to steal moments in my promising company.

The Vice President has an interest in the situation.

He's a snow gooser?

More a stalker of the black bear.

Owns a hunting cabin north of Chinook.

Ah. Hunts with the governor of Montana in fact.

They spoke today.

And he'd like to see this resolved bloodlessly.

Actually, he's more concerned we not back down,

that we not appear weak in any way.

"We?" The United States.

There's no "we" in this.

It's 15 drunks in camo vests.

The Vice President advocates a hard line.

Permanent lockout in the NHL?

Maple syrup embargo?

Turn off Niagara Falls?

I know you're disappointed...

We understand that the President has other priorities.

We were cool with Ms. Cregg as backup;

even Mr. Ziegler made sense.

But getting bumped to Deputy Press Secretary

in Charge of Hairstyles kind of sucks?

I'm sure you're great at what you do.

If we were a media club, we wouldn't be

lodging this protest.

We're not lodging a protest, Cody.

We're a political group.

Did you even read our materials?

As a matter of fact, I did.

Then you know a glorified field trip is a waste of our time.

Let's talk about it on our way to the East Room.

Josh.

I love what you've done with the place.

I expected the Congressman.

He's on his way.

But you're wasting his time with this.

Stem cell's not a waste.

It's a win for you with women.

You must have polled on this.

We have; that's not...

Caregivers get what this research means

for those with diabetes, Parkinson's...

ALS, Alzheimers.

Yep, we're on board.

Great to hear.

But we're not going down with the ship.

The problem isn't stem cells.

It's asking us to stick around

when there's no viable strategy to win this.

I am talking to the Congressman, at his request,

about his President's agenda.

Maybe you could

give us a sec...

You kicking me out? Of this office?

I got a better idea.

Why don't you give Josh and me a minute.

Take your time.

My office is your office.

Was, in fact.

You set this up? You can't let me out of your sight for a minute.

This is a lose-lose.

As long as you stay, Haffley won't call the vote.

As soon as you leave, he will. There's no way

to change that.

There is one way. If you'd just hear me out.

You have a plan to win this vote? But I'm gonna need you

to iron out some crucial details with Cliff.

Yes, ma'am?

What's this?

"Operation Northern Lights."

It's a working title.

You want to infiltrate Canada

with CIA operatives posing as ranchers?

Standard procedure in a hostage situation

on foreign soil-- assess the threat level.

Before the insertion extraction phase?

Yes, ma'am.

What, are you thinking blackhawks or helo drop?

I could get them both out.

Defcon-1 out of Fort Bragg, then the other...

Stop. The ranchers are making

a statement on Canadian television.

Don't give this to anyone.

Including me.

And the desk was made from the timbers of the HMS Resolute,

which was presented to President Hayes

by Queen Victoria in 1880.

The Presidential coat of arms was added by FDR,

who was President Bartlet's hero when he was your age.

Thanks, Phil.

So, are there any questions?

Ah!

As promised, the Director of White House Communications,

Mr. Toby Ziegler.

Hi, everybody.

Annabeth showing you the place?

We only have the Roosevelt Room left. Well, don't let me interrupt.

I have one question for Mr. Ziegler, if I may.

Sure. Fire away.

Do you know who we are? Yeah.

Junior Leaders of... Future Leaders for Democracy.

Were you briefed on our purpose?

Probably not. We're a youth lobby

in support of a Constitutional Amendment to forbid

discrimination of voting rights on the basis of age.

They want the voting age lowered.

We want it abolished.

Well, that's... radical.

Why did we get the brush-off today?

Why do we keep getting passed down the food chain?

Why do you keep looking at our chaperone

or Ms. Schott to intervene?

We're children.

And that in itself shouldn't render us meaningless.

But in this society we are meaningless,

'cause we're powerless, we have no voice.

Well, that's an interesting point.

I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll read your stuff.

The Roosevelt Room...

The brush-off again.

And why not?

No risk in offending us, we don't exist.

What is it you want? More than

a 15-minute tour and 30-second drive-by.

We've been shuffled around, ten minutes here,

ten minutes there. It's like there's a plot

to keep us from discussing our agenda

with anyone that matters.

What Cody means is that children's suffrage

is a complex issue and it...

I-I... I get it.

I get what he means.

Okay.

This is the Roosevelt Room...

where issues are discussed.

Pull up a chair.

It's your meeting.

PRESIDENT: When he was asked

why he wanted a one-armed economist,

Truman said because he was always being advised:

"On the one hand, but on the other hand..."

( laughing )

Academics often confound politicians.

Yes, in politics, it's dog eat dog;

in academia, it's the opposite.

( laughing )

When Japan Railway privatized in '87,

my theories were put to the test.

And you got lucky.

It would have been hard to fail worse than

the government had.

PRESIDENT: All that red ink...

must be why the private sector

turns to government for a bail-out

when things get tough.

And why disciplined leaders learn to say no.

I'm so sorry to interrupt.

But they're calling us in for dinner.

Excuse us.

Does the steward have laryngitis?

It would be a pity to battle MS,

only to succumb to an aneurysm.

Jefferson said it best:

A man's management of his own purse

speaks volumes about character.

You're still pissed about Stockholm?

We were Nobel Laureates in economics.

It was no empty gesture when he stiffed me for the cab fare.

I hear there's to be Latin dancing after dinner.

And he's a big fan. Oh.

I trust you'll save me tango, Dr. Bartlet.

Your dance card is full, Toots.

Jed, did you bring your cane?

You can hold me up.

Maybe I'll give him just a little samba.

Over my dead body.

FECTEAU: The Prime Minister

wishes to emphasize the unofficial nature

of the ranchers' declaration of war against the United States.

Thank you for that.

You have seen their demands on Canadian television?

We have.

are on ready response.

Some volunteer reinforcements

may be crossing over through Peace Park.

We are concerned about reports of escalation,

an effigy-burning

in Alberta.

A response to your governor of Montana.

He mentioned calling in the National Guard.

He referred to a contingency plan to invade Canada.

That is absurd. There is no

U.S. contingency plan to...

Are you there?

Yeah, um, I was saying,

we trust that local officials will resolve this very soon.

We'll be in touch.

We have a contingency plan to invade Canada?

Would you like to be briefed?

( sighs )

Other... other developments?

A sawmill in Climax

is piling on.

Is Climax us or them? Them.

Their demanding President Bartlet drop tariffs

on soft lumber products.

And a meat packing plant in Lodgepole-- us--

they're offering free coffee

to all Americans on their way to the front.

Can we at least not call it a front.

The Royal Canadians have arrived,

but they're at a disadvantage.

How so?

Mountie's standard issue is a Smith & Wesson, nine millimeter.

And the hunters are packing 12-gauge shotguns.

And...?

A couple Barrett .50-caliber snipers,

HK carbine fiber assault rifles

and infrared night goggles. ( giggles )

( sighs )

Congressman.

Talk to Josh.

He's going to Hartford?

Folks there paid to shake his hand.

You want me to...? No, no, no. Stay put.

I'm fine here.

But he can shake those hands and be back in D.C.

in a few hours. And the dozen congressman

who are heading out to stump for him?

I'm ready to start calling them back.

Thank you, man.

Thank the congressman.

But if there's a single Republican on this flight

or someone sees him at the airport...

He's flying himself.

He'll land at the private terminal.

The question is where does he go after that?

Give me a half an hour. It can be arranged.

( knock at door )

Hi.

Congressman.

Uh... do you want to come in?

So, the rumor's true.

You really do sleep in your office.

Can't afford DC rent

on this salary, and in Pine Bluff, we favor a short commute.

The President needs you, Arkansas.

You shared my concerns on stem cell

and I'm being summoned to the White House?

It's more legwork the President needs,

a loyal Democrat who can walk these halls

and look like he belongs here.

Where do I start?

Do you have some pants?

TOBY: I'm saying all societies

distinguish between an adult phase of life

with inherent rights, and childhood

as a time of development,

when those rights are curtailed,

But the 26th Amendment, lowering the voting age to 18, proved

that line is arbitrary-- or at least fluid.

In the 30 years since the 26th passed,

society has not much altered

its stance on when adulthood begins.

CODY: Well...

18 is still the common age of graduation from school,

military conscription...

What about children as young as 12

get tried for crimes as adults?

So, I'm mature enough to face sentencing

as a full citizen, but not to vote?

You can be pretty dumb

and commit a crime.

Voting requires a level of reasoning.

Adults don't have to prove any level of reasoning to vote.

Nor should they.

Okay, I'll cede that, but would you agree

children need special protections against coercion

and mistreatment by adults?

Sure.

Those same vulnerabilities

make them unable to vote independently.

That exact argument: immature logic...

And being easy to coerce.

That argument was used to prevent Negroes

and women from voting up until the 20th century.

Sorry. C.J.'s looking for you.

Your next meeting.

Dining and dancing.

And your parents called from District Pizza.

You guys are missing dinner.

Oh, my gosh. We are.

Um... we took up a lot of your time.

CODY: It's been great, sir.

Another half hour, I could have convinced you.

I believe you.

ELISHA: We heard District is the best pizza in town.

ANNABETH: Outrageous.

District Pizza delivers, don't they?

I think so.

I need the Mural Room for a meeting.

Is it Canada?

Okay.

Maybe I'm overly emotional these days,

but Mother's Canadian, you know. Dad hails from upstate,

so there's always been a north-south tug-of-war for us kids.

Today's events-- this is the kind of thing

that pulls families apart,

pits brother against brother.

So, can I have the room?

All yours.

Give peace a chance.

I wasn't looking.

I missed the whole thing.

He overdid it.

A man his age attempting a tango.

C.J.: A physician is on the way.

TAKAHASHI: Oh, there's no need.

Could we bring him some ice?

You hit your head.

Did you hurt yourself?

You are the expert on soft landings.

You tell me.

He's fine.

Congressman Santos is in Hartford tonight.

Do you want to leave word?

Sounds like I missed him.

I can try him on his cell.

Just tell him I stopped by. Good night.

Elvis has left the building.

CLIFF: Anyone see you?

Okay, Arkansas, Congressman Reilly's

approaching the south entrance.

Got it covered.

Nice flight?

A little turbulence, but, you know,

makes it interesting. Oh.

Does the Vice President know we're using his office for this?

I'm not telling him.

I'd keep the noise down and the curtains pulled.

You aren't staying?

Miles to go, and I can't be seen around here.

Can I get you anything?

Is there coffee...?

Yeah, and the soda's there,

washroom through there.

Thanks.

( screaming )

No, no, no, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

D-D-D-Don't, don't scream.

Don't scream. I'm... I'm sorry.

Aah.

I'm sorry.

Oh, God.

I didn't plan... I mean, I...

Oh, I crashed.

You're Russell's chicken fighter.

Donna Moss.

You're Matt Santos.

Running for President.

Um... and I haven't shaken your hand yet.

Okay.

Assuming I'm not in some state

of deep REM hallucination...

I'm hiding out.

We're trying to outsmart the Speaker,

have him think that we've all left town before he calls

the vote tomorrow.

And when you say "we"...?

There's some others that are coming. Excuse me.

Does the Vice President know that you...?

This is not for the Santos campaign.

It's for the President.

I bet you're a fan.

You're not going to try "It's for stem cells everywhere,"

are you?

I was going in next.

I made a fool of myself.

We all know the feeling.

Even Presidents?

Especially Presidents.

You're thinking of last week's veto override?

No, but thanks for the reminder.

Not that you should judge.

You'd veto all government spending.

You think I judge you?

We judge each other, always have.

Here, put this on it.

Thank you.

What if I were here as a friend, with a friendly warning?

What would that be?

Japan has been

heavily investing in your national debt.

If you mean that Japan has been buying US Treasury bonds,

Foreign investors have bought 90% of your new debt.

My government alone holds $700 billion

in assets.

Since when did deficits bother you?

They bother you.

Your work was a jeremiad

on keeping deficits low.

My work applied to developing economies.

There are rumors Singapore may dump her dollars.

It could start a run.

Never happen.

Japan could not afford to be caught.

It's in Japan's own interest

for these notes to hold their value.

We have an aging population.

We'll have to divest.

Gradually. A soft landing,

not that I don't appreciate the sentiment

behind your nightmare scenario.

A deficit projected over $300 billion on your watch

is not my nightmare.

Hence my veto of the highways bill.

Which I mistook for mutual concern

over the world's greatest economy,

burdened with mounting debt,

increasingly held

by foreign... friends.

What are friends for?

CANADIAN AMBASSADOR: Thank you for seeing me.

I know you've had a long day.

Will said something's on your mind.

As Canadian Ambassador,

I am pleased to report all's quiet

on the Western front.

Though still unresolved.

Yes. And when I spoke with the Vice President...

You called the vice president?

The Vice President called the Ambassador.

I've had some unofficial conversations...

You understand, I'm not at liberty to speak officially?

What are we talking about?

You'll have to excuse my, uh...

I don't, I haven't had much practice

at this kind of intrigue.

We all learn by doing.

Our two countries are close and historic friends.

Yes, of course, there are some areas where we differ--

Bovine spongiform is one.

And lumber tariffs.

And mail-order prescription drugs.

And U.S. global military presence.

But, on the whole, friends.

If you would trust me, I could prevail

upon the premier of the province

to exert pressure on his citizens to relent

and allow the Americans free passage back across the border.

That would be swell.

Of course, this would

create some... expectations.

Expectations?

The Ambassador suggested if there were some

flexibility on the U.S. appeal

of NAFTA's lumber decision...

Guys. The United States does not make trade decisions

based on the actions of amped-up cowboys.

Unless they've been

elected to office.

I-I understand you can't negotiate with me directly,

but if you sense the possibility

of an openness

to consider my proposal, you could

signal the same by... crossing your legs.

Or uncrossing and crossing them again.

Just to be sure.

Ambassador, listen carefully.

An hour ago I reviewed the United States

contingency plan to invade your country.

There's a contingency plan?

1789. Amended in 1815.

The calligraphy is beautiful, and if one more "deal"

is floated in this room, I'm gonna ask DOD to reactivate it.

You could argue that 18 is

the worst age to start voting.

You're all worried about college

or paying rent for the first time

or falling in love.

It isn't only power that corrupts.

Weakness corrupts.

It makes kids grow up cynical.

So you think half of adults

don't vote 'cause they didn't

get started soon enough?

Absolutely. Churches don't wait.

They get kids at birth,

and it's as kids we have unique concerns.

Like what?

I'm going to be breathing the air

and drinking the water after you're long gone,

but I can't vote

to protect the environment?

And we're required to attend

underfunded schools, but can't vote to improve them.

And kids who work pay into Social Security

without any say as to how the fund is managed.

Right. When you guys

fix Social Security, you have to keep

adults happy, but you can rob our future

without losing a single vote.

Here's another one.

Poverty among young people exceeds

all other age groups, yet the government

spends ten times more on each poor senior

than it does each poor child.

Wow.

We have no AARP to lobby for us.

We have no voice at all.

So, are you, uh...

Did we convince you?

Well, I'd go for lowering the age in increments--

and I wouldn't start at the federal level.

But you'll mention it to the President?

I'll do better than that.

But it's crucial to the President.

And I am in a crucial primary.

Sir. Gentlemen.

I'm sorry, buddy, but I am out of here.

( half-whisper ): Hey, Donna.

Congressman.

You want to take this in?

What about popcorn?

Smell too risky?

I'd wait another hour.

( knocks "Shave and a Haircut" )

( applause )

Greg, didn't you get the message about provisions?

Voilà.

It's 75 degrees here.

I may never go back to D.C.

It was a dirty trick.

Worked like a charm, though.

The Speaker crossed a line.

( knocking ) You should've seen the stuff we pulled

when we were the majority.

Why I hated coed dorms.

Once again we let the Republicans set the terms.

This is therapeutic research, not reproductive cloning.

Congressman, no more souls to ferry?

All in for now.

Well, pull up a chair.

We're, uh, preaching to the choir here on stem cells.

I may sing another tune.

( group boos )

No, no, no, take it easy; he's on our team.

It burns me up the Speaker didn't put this to a fair vote.

Even though you're leaning his way?

Should I turn in my decoder ring?

SANTOS: Haffley closed the floor to debate,

but we're not playing by his rules.

What are your reservations?

I have morality questions.

Ask them.

We have all night.

Half day?

Those Nobel laureates can party.

Did Josh fill you in on what's afoot on the Hill?

Operation Sleep Over?

A cool move, if it works.

What I can't figure is

how you get Haffley to call the vote.

He can put it off forever.

This is where squash comes in.

The sport or the vegetable?

I punish the Speaker every Thursday morning in a standing match.

Tomorrow? In five hours to be exact.

You're going to talk him into scheduling the vote on a squash court?

And shut him out with my awesome forehand at the same time.

Here's how it'll go:

I say, "Ooh, nice nick"-- squash talk--

"and nice maneuver on the floor, yesterday, pulling the vote."

He says, "Thanks. let, please.

"And play a little squash.

Everything's a game with you, I say.

Even research that can save millions of lives.

Stem cell's not a game, thus speaketh Haffley.

Looks like that to the President.

This research could be the trafficking in human embryos.

I don't take that lightly.

Oh, come on. If this were a trip to moral high ground

and not an inside-the-beltway bitch slap,

you'd schedule the vote now that you can win,

thus protecting clustered cells in petri dishes everywhere.

Why let it slide?

Maybe the Republican Party has a stronger interest

in keeping its base agitated

than it does in protecting the sanctity of human life

Might work.

Gonna have to let them win the game, though.

No mercy.

JUNIOR ARKANSAS: Yes, they're in labs,

but they're still embryos.

No. What-what they are-- have-have you seen them?--

they're frozen, fertilized eggs.

Call them eggs, call them genetic material,

they're potential human life.

Potential-- that's the key.

These embryos may contribute to life,

but-but they can never become a person, or-or even a fetus,

without a mother's womb.

That's a fine line.

Mystery of life.

It's all fine lines and tough odds,

as anyone who's ever been through

in vitro fertilization knows.

Do you object to that, too?

In vitro? No.

That's science helping folks conceive.

SANTOS: Well, these cells are what's leftover when that work is done.

JUNIOR ARKANSAS: But the science is the same as the science of cloning.

That's why funding would be limited to discarded cells.

If not used in research, these cells would be thrown away

There would be no outcry from Congress.

And, you know, if it's a moral call--

and I-I agree it is--

what about the morality of dragging our heels

when we could be alleviating suffering?

Is this true?

We have Officer Horn at the site confirming it now.

An American helicopter, entered Canadian airspace

without a flight plan and emergency-landed

in a field half a click from the standoff?

HORN ( on speaker ): Yes, ma'am.

This was a UH-1H helicopter?

HORN: Yes, ma'am.

A Huey.

They make civilian aircraft, too.

We have deniability...

I don't want deniability.

I want absolute assurance

this was not part of a military action on our part!

I can't vouch for Black Ops.

The problem is not a few rowdy outlaws from a bygone era

blowing off testosterone.

The problem is us.

We are still the Wild Bunch.

I mean, the higher it goes, the hotter the risk.

I just threatened the Canadian Ambassador.

Someone on the ground has got...

Okay. Officer, are you still there?

HORN: I am.

Who is the ranking Canadian at the scene?

Probably the Grasslands EcoRegion Director.

Does he or she have access to a bullhorn?

Could be arranged.

Okay. What if...

It's just past midnight Mountain Time.

Announce the end of hunting season.

That's not till next week.

It just changed. Ended at midnight.

And anyone of any nationality

discharging a fire arm is subject to immediate

and permanent loss of their hunting license.

HORN: Could work.

These guys don't fool around with hunting. Give it a shot.

PRESIDENT: The man's a gnat.

A buzzing mosquito.

Mm-hmm.

Nah, he's a pit bull.

He locks his jaws and won't let go.

Yeah.

With his doomsday predictions.

Uh-huh.

Not that that stuff keeps me awake.

No.

What keeps you awake is the deficit.

First term we made so much progress,

we were talking balanced budget.

Economy slowed.

Costs spiralled.

Security at home,

terrorism...

peacekeeping abroad,

Republican tax cuts-- I couldn't control it.

And I'm an economist for God's sakes.

Mm, and a smart one.

I gotta ask: What's the next guy, a mere mortal, gonna do?

It's like Eisenhower.

In what way?

Even though he'd been a General,

when he was President, he couldn't do anything

to control the military industrial, you know...

( sighs )

He did one thing.

DONNA: Haffley just called

the first procedural bill of the day approving the journal.

Testing to see if there's anyone here to flush out.

He announced the day's going to be

about pharmaceutical drug trials.

GROUP ( groaning ): Oh, no...

Stem cell isn't on the agenda?

TOBY: This is a nationally televised Presidential press conference.

You don't speak unless you're called on.

Yes, sir.

C.J.: The President's on his way.

Anything from the Hill? Not so far.

You think that would be appropriate?

I don't think that would be a problem at all, sir.

( chuckling ): No. Good morning.

Morning, sir. Morning, sir.

Ready to shake things up, Toby?

Yes, sir. If you're in the mood,

there's a young man in the back you might want to call on.

Mm-hmm.

Good morning.

I love you all, but two days without a change of clothes,

I may switch parties.

Whose toothpaste was this?

What did I miss?

We're reconsidering our strategy.

Let's give it another hour, guys.

DONNA: Haffley just called the vote.

For stem cell?

Just now.

Well, 20 seconds ago.

Got your voting card? ( group cheers )

Right here.

Get on out there and vote.

Chris? Mr. President! Mr. President!

CHRIS: Mr. President, as you head into your final year in office,

do you have any regrets?

One big regret-- and here's your lead, people--

is my failure to bring the budget deficit under control.

I know, an election cycle is warming up and no one wants

to hear about budget deficits,

but both sides are gonna hear about them from me.

That's my campaign promise.

Honestly, I wasn't sure you'd follow through and schedule it.

Thanks for your vote, Congressman.

CONGRESSIONAL STAFFER: One more vote arriving!

Angela, thanks for coming in.

With your help, we've got this one sewed up.

Thought maybe you'd join us on this one.

Administration bend your ear?

I made up my own mind, Mr. Speaker.

I had such high hopes for you.

Sometimes when you get them

while they're still wet behind the ears, it's...

Mr. Speaker.

Good match today.

Mr. President! Mr. President!

The young man in the back, I'm sorry I don't know your name.

Cody Zucker, Mr. President.

PRESIDENT: Cody?

Do you think the budget deficit

is especially unfair to younger Americans?

Absolutely.

that's not something

a responsible parent would choose to do.

Yeah, David.

CODY: A follow-up, sir.

Do you think we'd have such a large deficit

if children were allowed to vote?

PRESIDENT: Well, as adults, we certainly

aren't shouldering our responsibility

and your generation has a vested interest.

Allowing children to vote is worthy of consideration.

PRESIDENT: Thank you, Cody.

PRESIDENT: Yeah, David?

C.J.: Well done, Commander Harper.

Cooler heads prevailed.

All Americans home safe?

Peace in our time.

TV REPORTER: ...turn of events will end the Speaker's unchallenged control.

The surprise arrival was led by Presidential hopeful,

Congressman Matt Santos.

SANTOS: It was a stunt; no doubt about it.

Good work.

Group effort.

Santos was the brains.

216 Congressmen and women did the voting.

And on the squash court?

Best of five. All by myself.

You know, sometimes the American people

wonder what it is we do here in Congress.

Sometimes I wonder myself.

Today wasn't one of those days.

Yes?