Original subtitles

(Kirby) Sooner or later, everything comes to an end.

The last episode of Big Bald Oaf.

Why did he like his chili so hot?

(Kirby) But like they say,

every ending is also a new beginning.

Hey, Oafers!

I need a new show!

Which is why I'm returning to my hometown of Forest Hills

to listen to your ideas.

Whoever brings me the best idea will get to work with yours truly

on spinning it into cartoon gold.

So, if you think you've got a great idea,

and you've got... The Goods, I'll see you in Forest Hills.

Guys? Looks like I have to--

You really don't need to say it.

(theme song playing)

♪ Hey ♪

♪ Hey ♪

♪ Hey ♪

♪ Hey ♪

Howdy, coworker.

Ready to make cartoon gold?

(announcer) Mac McCallister!

So sweet working with my hero.

(Kirby) Kirby Buckets!

I don't know, Kirby.

It might not be that easy to win the contest.

A lot of people will be pitching ideas.

You heard him, Eli.

All you need is a great idea and The Goods, and I've got The Goods.

The Goods...

What exactly are The Goods?

(exhales) It's that spark.

That magic that puts you over the top.

You know... The Goods.

More like The Not-Goods! Boom!

You obviously don't have The Goods...

because we have The Goods.

No way! Kirby is the only one here with The Goods.

You would think that.

You just do whatever Kirby tells you to do.

You're like his puppet!

Puppet?

Fish Fisher is the one pulling the strings, baby!

You know the guy, behind the guy, behind the guy?

Well, I'm behind that guy!

I am the puppet master!

You're all my puppets!

(scoffing)

Where are you guys going? Class hasn't even started yet.

Uh, we're gonna be big TV stars soon,

and big TV stars don't need school!

(blowing raspberries)

(laughing)

The Goods...

-The Goods... -(shutters clicking)

The Goods!

Belinda, I've finally figured out why nothing ever works out for me.

Because you don't plan things through

and are mostly motivated by greed and hate?

No. Because I haven't been using a vision board.

Turns out, all you need to do

is put pictures of things you want on a piece of cardboard,

and it'll come true.

Dawn...

You don't get the future you want

by just sitting around thinking good thoughts.

You get it by consulting a reliable psychic!

Did you just say psychic?

Psychics are a lot more reliable than vision boards.

Mm-hm, yeah. Says who?

Says Phillip. He's my psychic.

Your psychic's name is Phillip.

Phillip knows things, Dawn.

Well, maybe we should find out.

Your psychic versus my vision board.

Whoever has more things come true wins.

And the loser has to attend the worst party of the year...

Big Ricky's...

Masque-Rage Ball.

Fine. You're on!

-Phillip said this would happen. -No, he didn't!

It's okay. You just have to come up

with the best idea you've ever come up with.

You know, Kirby, sometimes the best ideas are right in front of your f--

None of you are good enough for Mac!

(crying)

Now look what you've done!

I'm sorry, it's just-- I'm under a lot of pressure right now.

(Mom) I have the best idea for a TV show!

Oh, geez...

From the mean streets of Forest Hills

comes a vigilante who strikes terror into the heart of crime!

-Honey? -Mm.

The Childless Avenger!

Haaa!

Unencumbered by family, the Childless Avenger

strikes down criminal scum thanks to all her free time!

She also goes to the movies in the afternoon!

Can you do anything about this?

-Yeah. -No. No, this isn't over!

You haven't heard the last of the Childless Avenger!

Sorry, Kirby. Your mom has TV fever.

So unprofessional.

But how about this for a show?

Dads. Sure, they don't get a lot of press,

but they can get into some pretty sticky situations.

Like yesterday, my neighbor used my hose, so...

Okay, we're done here.

See, this is an episode right here.

Aah! Why do I like my beef stew so hot?

I call it Big Loud Oaf .

I really think Max is gonna love it.

I mean, isn't that exactly Big Bald Oaf?

No-no-no-no, that's Big Bald Oaf.

This is Big Loud Oaf. They're totally different.

You're his puppet master. Can you do anything about this?

Okay, you know, I've got other ideas.

Uh, dads! I mean, sure, they don't get a lot of press,

but they can get into some pretty sticky...

What's happening? I'm supposed to have The Goods!

The Goods...

I've lost The Goods!

I always assumed I'd be a great animator when I grew up,

but... if I don't have The Goods,

I don't know what I'm gonna do with my life!

Relax, Kirb. I'm puppet-mastering this entire situation.

'Cause I'm a puppet master.

(sighs)

Don't worry about The Goods, Kirby.

I always assumed you would take over the S and P when I retire.

Can I interest you in a hot dog?

I call this one Little Billy because he's only five years old!

(guffaws)

I need to get back The Goods

so I can come up with an idea for Mac.

What's up with all the carbs in this place?

A little sympathy for my abs, amigos .

Okay, I know I have a lot on my plate right now,

but... what's all this?

Here's the sitch: everything you think you know

about your boy Eli is straight fiction.

I was born fierce, winning, and beautiful,

which made me the perfect child model.

They called me... "The Goods,"

for obvious reasons.

(shutters clicking)

But when you're as fierce, winning, and beautiful as I am,

haters gonna hate.

Some models set me up for a fake photo shoot

and hypnotized me with hypnotic model moves.

In my hypnotic state, they convinced me

I was sweet, honest, and bumbling.

But now, the mighty tiger's out of the cage.

All it took for me was to hear "The Goods"

about 50 or 60 times,

so, nice work overusing that term so much, fellas.

-Eli-- -Uh! Call me... "The Goods."

I'm not calling you that.

Really? And I suppose you also don't want me

to solve your little problem

by hypnotizing you with hypnotic model moves, huh?

That is correct, yes.

Basic, bros. Super basic.

And deepen that V, son!

I'm winning this bet, Dawn.

So I hope you're ready to attend Big Ricky's

terrible masquerade ball.

You're attending Big Ricky's ball,

-and you're gonna hate it! -You're gonna hate it!

I don't know what I'm more offended by:

your harsh words regarding Masque-rage,

or the fact that you believe in psychics and vision boards.

Oh, please, what do you know?

I know that mankind has only one reliable gateway to future events...

and that's Douglas's dreams.

I'm telling you, two big swigs from Kurt's patented healing boot

can cure almost anything.

What are you, chicken?

Watch this.

You're very smart. Carry on. Buck-buck-bagock!

Ugh. Yeah, there is no way I'm drinking out of that.

Guess who just came up with the best idea ever.

Check it out.

Heartbreaker, MD, and Fartbreaker,

also MD.

Yeah, that doesn't look that funny to me.

It's not supposed to be funny, Buckets.

It's a hospital drama, and things get real.

Heartbreaker and Fartbreaker are saving lives, bro.

That's exactly what I wanted you to pitch...

because I'm a puppet master.

(scoffs) Oh, yeah?

Well, what's that over there, puppet master?

Ha-ha! Made you look!

I'm the puppet master!

I'm the puppet master.

Naw. I'm the puppet master.

(blowing raspberry)

-(kissing) -(laughs)

(Mitchell) Mr. Buckets.

You should know I've come up with the perfect idea for a television show.

I call it Space Principal: the Final Detention.

No running in the hall!

Space detention!

Good luck beating that.

(wind whooshes)

(sighs)

I gotta find a way to get The Goods back.

Well, there is one thing we haven't tried yet.

It's cool, Gideon. I know these guys.

What's up, kemosabe?

You here to block my shine?

Please hypnotize me with your hypnotic model moves.

What's my name?

Say it?

The Goods.

Boom.

Was that so hard?

This is ridiculous.

You're getting sleepy, bro.

You're mesmerized by these hypnotic model moves.

You're falling into a trance deeper than this sick V.

And you'll wake up

with your best... idea... ever.

I just don't see how this...

(echoing) Where am I?

Hello, me.

Welcome to your own mind.

I need to find The Goods. Where are they?

(roaring)

Aah!

What was that?

Those are the characters you started drawing

but never finished.

They were bad ideas anyway.

If you're looking for The Goods,

you need to travel deeper into your subconscious.

But be warned, there's a chance you might never make it out.

Really?

I mean, probably. You're the first one. I don't really know.

(whistling nonchalantly)

(Eli and Fish) Kirby!

(screaming)

What are we gonna do? The pitch competition

is about to begin, and we cannot snap him out of it.

Fine. I'll hypnotize the judges with my hypnotic model moves--

No more hypnotic model moves!

Come on!

Kirby!

-Kirby! -Kirby!

Let the puppet master handle this!

A list of Douglas's dreams.

When more of these come true than your stupid vision board

and psychic stuff,

you're both coming to my Masque-rage Ball.

These dreams are ridiculous.

Principal Mitchell as some sort of space captain? Really?

Out of the way, terrestrials.

I have an animation competition to win.

And when I do, I shall boldly discipline

where no principal has disciplined before.

(wind whooshes)

Let me know what color dresses you're wearing to the ball.

I wanna match my boutonniere.

And then, Fartbreaker, MD, is all like,

"Part of me died on that operating table, too."

And then, he farts.

And then he farts.

(crickets chirping)

Thanks. We'll be in touch.

-(laughing) -(blows raspberries)

It seems like Forest Hills isn't exactly the hotbed of creative talent

you led the network to believe, Mac.

Trust me, this next kid is gonna knock it out of the park.

Kirby! You're up!

(sighs)

Kirby says, "Hello."

He thought the pitch would go better

if someone super good-looking did the talking, so...

lucky you!

Out of the park, huh?

Let's... See where this is going.

Climb the mountain, Kirby.

And you will see The Goods.

Sorry, Bud. We can't let you pass.

What? Why?

You tell us.

For some reason, you think we're "obstacles"

to your creativity.

So, in order to proceed, you need to solve the unsolvable riddle.

-What has two legs-- -Is it dads?

Seriously?

That's right. You must also get past the puppet master and Eli's deep V.

(Eli's voice echoing) Lucky you...

Are they gonna pitch a show?

Because it seems like the one kid is just modeling a wristwatch.

Kirby seems different.

He doesn't always slap himself in the face like that.

I think something's up.

I knew it. A puppet master!

He is the puppet master!

(roaring)

Goods! Show yourself!

Ohh! I don't get it! Where are they?

You're surrounded by them, Kirby.

You mean?

That's right.

My friends and family? They're the ones who inspire me.

They're The Goods!

Why couldn't you just tell me that earlier?

It's your head, you tell me.

What's going on?

Shh! We're crushing it! Don't mess this up!

They're really not.

Uh... okay, let's just forget about whatever that was,

but, uh... let me tell you about some people I know.

-(Douglas crying) -(kids laughing)

Everyone laughing at Douglas while he cries uncontrollably.

That's dream number seven, and 12, and 23.

Unbelievable.

Who would've thought psychics and vision boards

would let us down like this?

Only one more, and my Masque-rage Ball

will have five people attending this year!

Lucky for me, there's only one more dream on the list.

Douglas dreamt that Kirby's gonna win some big contest today.

So there you go.

It's a show about my life...

a kid animator with great family and friends who do crazy stuff.

So what do you think?

Well, I have to say, that is quite something, young man.

-(screaming) -Oh!

(screaming)

We're ruining it! (screams)

So, I take it, this is the sister you were talking about!

You're right. She's terrible.

I think we've found our winner.

-What? -For real?

I think this kid needs to be close to the people who inspire him.

The terrible... terrible people that inspire him.

Mac, how would you feel

about setting up an animation studio here in town?

I think I can handle that.

Perfect. Now if you'll excuse me, we're late for a haircut.

Mm-hm.

I presume you'll be in touch regarding Space Principal?

Oh, absolutely not. That idea was garbage.

No, you have not heard the last...

of Space Principal.

(wind whooshes)

So, uh, Puppet Master, we were wondering if you could

"pull some strings" and get us a job at Mac's studio?

Please? We'll do whatever you want.

But you already do whatever I want.

Because I'm a puppet master.

(laughing)

Ha! I'll see what I can do.

(blowing raspberry)

So! Looks like you and me are gonna be working together.

I'm really gonna need you to start dressing differently.

Oh... yeah, definitely, whatever you want.

I can't believe this is actually happening.

Believe it, kid. I'll be in touch.

You might wanna hang onto this. According to Douglas's dreams,

Kirby's new show is gonna make a lot of fun of you.

See ya!

Check it out, the first sketch for my new show.

Man, that's great, Kirb.

But we've got other things to worry about.

Hey, The Goods!

Can we see some more of those hypnotic model moves?

Oh, def.

Where am I?

Hello, The Goods.

Welcome to your own mind.

I'm afraid only one of us is getting out of here.

Eli!

Eli? Are you back?

Yep. Don't worry, guys. I'm back to my old self.

Now hang on a minute and watch this.

Can I interest you in a hot dog?

I call this one Little Billy, because he's only five years old.

(screaming)

The exact string I wanted to pull.

(string twangs)

Yeah, guys!

Eeeeahh!

Hey, mark!