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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,583 --> 00:00:02,583 (heroic music) 2 00:00:06,792 --> 00:00:08,632 (alarm buzzing) 3 00:00:12,291 --> 00:00:14,291 Hulk: Listen up, team. It's training time. 4 00:00:14,417 --> 00:00:16,127 That means learning to work together. 5 00:00:16,208 --> 00:00:19,998 Yo, Hulkites. You're getting exclusive access to Hulk practice. 6 00:00:20,083 --> 00:00:22,423 Check out how we make smashing magic. 7 00:00:22,500 --> 00:00:23,710 One side, Jones. 8 00:00:23,792 --> 00:00:25,042 -(thuds) -(groans) 9 00:00:25,125 --> 00:00:26,535 Hey. 10 00:00:26,625 --> 00:00:28,535 -(gasps) -(thuds) 11 00:00:29,083 --> 00:00:30,633 Red Hulk: Merry Christmas, smashers. 12 00:00:30,709 --> 00:00:32,499 Troops are only as good as their weapons, 13 00:00:32,583 --> 00:00:34,133 so, come and get them. 14 00:00:34,208 --> 00:00:35,538 Here you go, rookie. 15 00:00:35,625 --> 00:00:37,825 The gamma rocket launcher! 16 00:00:38,041 --> 00:00:38,881 Whoa! 17 00:00:38,959 --> 00:00:40,999 Don't say I never did nothing for you. 18 00:00:41,083 --> 00:00:42,833 -Awesome sauce! -(launcher charging) 19 00:00:42,917 --> 00:00:44,037 (Red Hulk groaning) 20 00:00:45,250 --> 00:00:46,330 (groans) 21 00:00:46,667 --> 00:00:49,457 (nervous chuckle) Uh, sorry. Safety was off. 22 00:00:49,542 --> 00:00:50,672 Heya, Skaar. 23 00:00:50,750 --> 00:00:53,290 You like stuff what goes boom, don't you? 24 00:00:53,375 --> 00:00:54,285 Hmm. 25 00:00:54,417 --> 00:00:55,287 (swishes) 26 00:00:55,417 --> 00:00:57,877 Red Hulk: The ka-boomerang! 27 00:00:57,959 --> 00:00:59,169 Hmm. (sniffing) 28 00:00:59,250 --> 00:01:00,420 -(growling) -(clangs) 29 00:01:00,667 --> 00:01:03,577 And some fancy hand wear for the lady. 30 00:01:04,542 --> 00:01:06,502 Red Hulk: The gamma gauntlets! 31 00:01:07,458 --> 00:01:10,128 -Oh, no. These are for everyday use. -(crackling) 32 00:01:10,208 --> 00:01:11,788 -(grunts) -(thuds) 33 00:01:12,291 --> 00:01:15,211 Problem with Greenie leading is, he's too cautious. 34 00:01:15,291 --> 00:01:17,211 You wanna lead, you do it from the front 35 00:01:17,291 --> 00:01:20,081 like I'm gonna do when I take charge of this unit. 36 00:01:20,166 --> 00:01:22,666 Gotta get the troops on my side first, though. 37 00:01:22,750 --> 00:01:25,750 That's why they got the new hardware. 38 00:01:25,834 --> 00:01:26,834 (sighing) 39 00:01:26,917 --> 00:01:29,167 I know Red. He's up to no good. 40 00:01:29,250 --> 00:01:32,210 Probably trying to take over the team or some nonsense. 41 00:01:33,166 --> 00:01:35,996 -Hulk: Dibs on this! -Hey, I was gonna use the gamma blaster! 42 00:01:38,417 --> 00:01:40,787 We got our weapons. Let's do this. 43 00:01:40,875 --> 00:01:44,415 Give me that remote, Jade Jaws. This is my territory. 44 00:01:44,500 --> 00:01:47,830 I've trained raw recruits into special forces elite. 45 00:01:47,917 --> 00:01:51,707 Children, get ready for the Hulk Smasher 5000. 46 00:01:52,750 --> 00:01:54,500 (clanking) 47 00:01:55,375 --> 00:01:57,665 All right, A-Bomb, ball up and hit it low. 48 00:01:57,750 --> 00:02:01,130 Skaar, slash it open so She-Hulk can get to the controls. 49 00:02:01,417 --> 00:02:03,417 -Red, take long-range firepower-- -(yelling) 50 00:02:03,500 --> 00:02:06,000 I'll just show you how it's done. 51 00:02:06,083 --> 00:02:07,293 (laughing) 52 00:02:07,375 --> 00:02:08,785 -Skaar throw. -(clangs) 53 00:02:09,667 --> 00:02:11,287 Pay attention, Fido. 54 00:02:11,375 --> 00:02:12,745 I'll train you. (grunts) 55 00:02:13,500 --> 00:02:14,420 (explodes) 56 00:02:16,166 --> 00:02:18,666 I'm gonna light this baby up, A-Bomb style. 57 00:02:18,750 --> 00:02:19,790 -Give me that. -Hey! 58 00:02:19,875 --> 00:02:21,035 Watch and learn, rookie. 59 00:02:21,166 --> 00:02:22,786 -(yelling) -(gunshots) 60 00:02:25,250 --> 00:02:27,130 -(yells) -(explodes) 61 00:02:30,208 --> 00:02:32,748 So, how exactly is this teamwork? 62 00:02:34,333 --> 00:02:36,333 -(Red yelling) -(rapid gunshots) 63 00:02:36,959 --> 00:02:38,999 Red wants to lead a team. 64 00:02:39,166 --> 00:02:42,036 He just... doesn't want anyone else on it. 65 00:02:42,792 --> 00:02:45,542 Don't worry. I'm here to pick up Red's pieces. 66 00:02:45,625 --> 00:02:47,245 (weapon powering-up) 67 00:02:48,083 --> 00:02:50,293 -(whooshing) -(exploding) 68 00:02:51,291 --> 00:02:52,081 (thuds) 69 00:02:52,166 --> 00:02:54,416 Remind me to slug Red when this is over. 70 00:02:54,750 --> 00:02:56,460 -(grunting) -(thumping) 71 00:02:58,000 --> 00:02:59,210 (yelling) 72 00:02:59,417 --> 00:03:01,037 -(yelling) -(thumping) 73 00:03:01,750 --> 00:03:04,460 You're not gonna one-up me, Greenie! 74 00:03:06,291 --> 00:03:07,791 (explodes) 75 00:03:11,625 --> 00:03:13,165 -(clanks) -(alarm buzzes) 76 00:03:13,792 --> 00:03:16,212 What are you, a one-man army? 77 00:03:16,291 --> 00:03:18,461 Save some for the rest of us, Green. 78 00:03:18,542 --> 00:03:20,502 Hey, you went all lone wolf. 79 00:03:20,583 --> 00:03:23,293 There's problems out there bigger than tanks, Red. 80 00:03:23,375 --> 00:03:25,455 Problems you can't handle alone. 81 00:03:25,583 --> 00:03:27,043 Red Hulk: I can handle anything. 82 00:03:27,208 --> 00:03:28,128 (rumbling) 83 00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:29,628 Whoa. Whoa, whoa! Hey now! 84 00:03:29,709 --> 00:03:32,169 -(alarm buzzing) -Earthquake? 85 00:03:35,458 --> 00:03:36,668 What is it? 86 00:03:37,709 --> 00:03:39,499 (rumbling) 87 00:03:41,083 --> 00:03:42,423 A planet. 88 00:03:42,709 --> 00:03:44,039 And it's coming this way. 89 00:03:48,875 --> 00:03:50,875 (theme music) 90 00:03:57,333 --> 00:03:59,173 Quick, everybody on the elevator. 91 00:03:59,625 --> 00:04:00,955 -(rumbling) -(alarm buzzing) 92 00:04:03,834 --> 00:04:05,674 Is the end near? 93 00:04:05,834 --> 00:04:07,544 If you're like me and eyeing the sky, 94 00:04:07,625 --> 00:04:09,785 you're seeing a hunk of extinction-sized rock 95 00:04:09,875 --> 00:04:11,785 racing into our zip code. 96 00:04:12,125 --> 00:04:14,995 The uniforms at S.H.I.E.L.D. are saying there's nothing to worry about, 97 00:04:15,083 --> 00:04:17,633 -and this reporter hopes... -These earthquakes will only get worse 98 00:04:17,709 --> 00:04:19,419 as the planetoid gets closer. 99 00:04:19,500 --> 00:04:22,170 Even if it misses, it'll still tear earth apart. 100 00:04:22,583 --> 00:04:24,003 Planet evil. 101 00:04:24,291 --> 00:04:26,711 So, how do we stop it? Put up a detour sign? 102 00:04:26,792 --> 00:04:28,422 Hulk: We need to get a closer look. 103 00:04:28,500 --> 00:04:30,920 -Everyone into the jump jet. -No need, Green. 104 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:33,880 I'll do this myself and be back by supper time. 105 00:04:33,959 --> 00:04:34,959 (growls) 106 00:04:36,166 --> 00:04:38,376 (engine bellowing) 107 00:04:43,041 --> 00:04:44,541 (whooshing) 108 00:04:49,542 --> 00:04:51,882 All right, I let you take her out, 109 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:54,500 but you're in my pilot's chair, buddy. 110 00:04:54,583 --> 00:04:56,423 I called shotgun for you, Shulkie. 111 00:04:56,500 --> 00:04:59,670 Sit back, relax, and I'll get us out to that rock in no time. 112 00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:03,960 Look, I'm as excited to punch a planet as the next Hulk, but... 113 00:05:04,041 --> 00:05:06,921 But nothing. I've done this a thousand times, Greenie. 114 00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:10,290 I'm gonna go ahead and doubt you've ever punched a planet. 115 00:05:10,375 --> 00:05:13,915 Let's see what the professional planet smasher has in mind. 116 00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:16,540 Seatbacks and tray tables in the upright position! 117 00:05:16,625 --> 00:05:17,575 (Red Hulk laughs) 118 00:05:21,375 --> 00:05:23,625 First rule of being in charge, 119 00:05:23,709 --> 00:05:27,129 be better than the Green-grilled noobs you're bossing around. 120 00:05:27,291 --> 00:05:29,581 Good leader does everybody's job better. 121 00:05:30,417 --> 00:05:32,747 I told Fury we're taking the first shot. 122 00:05:32,834 --> 00:05:36,504 I figure if we target the planet's poles we can knock it off-course. 123 00:05:36,583 --> 00:05:38,543 Off-course? (scoffs) 124 00:05:38,625 --> 00:05:40,745 I'm blowing that mud-ball to smithereens. 125 00:05:40,834 --> 00:05:42,544 -(thumps) -(laughs) 126 00:05:43,083 --> 00:05:44,293 (whooshes) 127 00:05:46,250 --> 00:05:48,080 (exploding) 128 00:05:48,625 --> 00:05:50,075 Hulk: Nice going, Red. 129 00:05:50,166 --> 00:05:52,666 Maybe you could just yell at it next time. 130 00:05:52,750 --> 00:05:54,000 -Um, guys? -(sensor beeping) 131 00:05:54,250 --> 00:05:55,750 This is weird. 132 00:05:55,834 --> 00:05:58,174 The planet's gravity is doubling. 133 00:05:58,542 --> 00:06:01,252 She-Hulk: And we're being sucked right into it. 134 00:06:01,750 --> 00:06:03,130 (grunting) 135 00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:06,000 Red Hulk: What is that? 136 00:06:06,500 --> 00:06:07,750 Is it just me, 137 00:06:07,917 --> 00:06:10,377 or does that planet kinda look like a dude? 138 00:06:10,458 --> 00:06:15,458 Ego: Who dares disturb Ego? 139 00:06:18,208 --> 00:06:19,958 (gasping) It's... a... 140 00:06:20,041 --> 00:06:21,081 living... 141 00:06:21,166 --> 00:06:22,286 planet... 142 00:06:22,750 --> 00:06:24,670 who speaks perfect English. 143 00:06:24,750 --> 00:06:26,420 Does anybody else think that's weird? 144 00:06:26,500 --> 00:06:27,880 Insects. 145 00:06:27,959 --> 00:06:31,209 You have incited Ego's wrath. 146 00:06:32,291 --> 00:06:35,291 Know you're in trouble when you tick off a planet with a face. 147 00:06:36,125 --> 00:06:38,165 (wheezing) 148 00:06:39,250 --> 00:06:41,290 Ugly planet eat us? 149 00:06:41,417 --> 00:06:43,077 Kinda looking that way. 150 00:06:43,750 --> 00:06:45,460 A-Bomb: Hulk, if you've got a plan, 151 00:06:45,542 --> 00:06:47,002 now's the time to share. 152 00:06:47,083 --> 00:06:48,833 Hulk: Your one-man show is over. 153 00:06:48,917 --> 00:06:50,077 Hey! 154 00:06:50,208 --> 00:06:52,168 It's a mutiny, is what it is. 155 00:06:52,250 --> 00:06:53,880 (grunting) 156 00:06:54,792 --> 00:06:56,422 Firing all thrusters. 157 00:06:56,542 --> 00:06:59,042 (engine roaring) 158 00:07:08,083 --> 00:07:09,923 She-Hulk: We're breaking free! 159 00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:11,000 A-Bomb: Uh... 160 00:07:11,083 --> 00:07:12,713 we're going the wrong way. 161 00:07:12,792 --> 00:07:14,752 Hulk: Gravity's too strong! 162 00:07:15,250 --> 00:07:17,250 (tense music) 163 00:07:18,625 --> 00:07:20,245 astronaut 1: This is Salvation One. 164 00:07:20,333 --> 00:07:23,003 We've lost our visual on the Agents of S.M.A.S.H. Over. 165 00:07:23,333 --> 00:07:25,753 mission control: Copy that. Move into orbit and stand by. 166 00:07:26,083 --> 00:07:28,173 astronaut 2: Sorry, Hulks. You're on your own. 167 00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:31,000 (engine bellowing) 168 00:07:33,542 --> 00:07:34,752 -She-Hulk: Is that... -(thuds) 169 00:07:34,834 --> 00:07:35,834 ...ugh, hair? 170 00:07:36,166 --> 00:07:40,376 Oh, sick, dude. He's got massive beard tendrils. 171 00:07:40,458 --> 00:07:43,418 We're not getting taken out by some planet's scruffy beard. 172 00:07:43,500 --> 00:07:45,210 Everybody, to your fighters. 173 00:07:45,291 --> 00:07:47,581 Stand down, Greenie. I haven't given that-- 174 00:07:47,667 --> 00:07:49,127 -(thuds) -(groans) 175 00:07:51,250 --> 00:07:53,630 Why do I get the caboose, huh? 176 00:07:54,750 --> 00:07:56,750 Skaar: Skaar shave. 177 00:07:56,959 --> 00:07:58,499 Skaar, look out. 178 00:07:58,667 --> 00:08:00,287 (Skaar yelling) 179 00:08:00,458 --> 00:08:02,998 We've lost Skaar. We're turning around. 180 00:08:03,458 --> 00:08:05,128 (whooshing) 181 00:08:05,417 --> 00:08:08,627 What? We're all going after dog boy? 182 00:08:11,041 --> 00:08:12,581 (rumbles) 183 00:08:13,041 --> 00:08:15,131 -I'm hit. Going down. -(alarm wailing) 184 00:08:15,208 --> 00:08:17,078 -We're all going down. -(alarm beeping) 185 00:08:18,083 --> 00:08:20,543 If we do, the earth is finished. 186 00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:22,922 (explodes) 187 00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:26,750 -(groans) -Great. There goes our ride home. 188 00:08:27,041 --> 00:08:28,791 (rumbling) 189 00:08:29,875 --> 00:08:32,625 All right, you floating ball of ugly. 190 00:08:32,750 --> 00:08:34,040 You and me. 191 00:08:34,125 --> 00:08:36,375 Right here. Right now. 192 00:08:37,792 --> 00:08:39,042 -(thuds) -(rumbles) 193 00:08:39,709 --> 00:08:43,629 Ego has graced this galaxy with his numinous presence, 194 00:08:43,709 --> 00:08:46,579 absorbing planets to increase his size. 195 00:08:46,667 --> 00:08:48,627 See that big, blue orb up there? 196 00:08:48,709 --> 00:08:50,629 That's our planet, Earth. 197 00:08:50,709 --> 00:08:52,079 You're about to wreck the place. 198 00:08:52,166 --> 00:08:54,746 And endanger billions of lives, you jerk. 199 00:08:58,166 --> 00:08:59,786 -(grunting) -(thumping) 200 00:09:00,583 --> 00:09:02,293 Ego: Specks of dust. 201 00:09:02,417 --> 00:09:04,827 You mean nothing to Ego. 202 00:09:05,041 --> 00:09:09,501 All you have gained is a clear view of the destruction of your world. 203 00:09:09,583 --> 00:09:10,833 (roaring) 204 00:09:10,917 --> 00:09:12,457 (rumbling) 205 00:09:13,208 --> 00:09:14,628 What are you doing? 206 00:09:14,709 --> 00:09:17,379 I had that rocky jerk right where I wanted him. 207 00:09:17,458 --> 00:09:19,538 I don't know who has the bigger ego, 208 00:09:19,625 --> 00:09:22,535 you or the planet named "Ego". 209 00:09:22,667 --> 00:09:23,957 Ego may be bigger, 210 00:09:24,041 --> 00:09:26,421 but we still got him outnumbered five to one. 211 00:09:26,542 --> 00:09:30,002 We need to stick together. Change his mind. 212 00:09:30,083 --> 00:09:31,883 Change mind? 213 00:09:32,417 --> 00:09:35,037 Maybe... smash brain. 214 00:09:35,125 --> 00:09:37,205 From the mouths of barbarians. 215 00:09:38,041 --> 00:09:40,041 (tense music) 216 00:09:42,750 --> 00:09:44,630 Red Hulk: If we wanna get to its brain, 217 00:09:44,709 --> 00:09:47,169 we go through Schnoz Mountain over there. 218 00:09:47,250 --> 00:09:49,920 Hulk: We won't get far jumping. Gravity's too strong. 219 00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:51,130 We walk from here. 220 00:09:51,208 --> 00:09:53,788 You couldn't lead your butt out of a pair of purple shorts. 221 00:09:53,875 --> 00:09:54,995 Follow me! 222 00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:58,750 Being a leader isn't about being best at everything. 223 00:09:59,166 --> 00:10:01,786 It's about knowing the strengths of your teammates. 224 00:10:03,083 --> 00:10:05,213 Red Hulk: Ha, you see that, Hulky? 225 00:10:05,291 --> 00:10:07,131 I got us halfway to the mountain, 226 00:10:07,208 --> 00:10:08,878 safe and sound. 227 00:10:08,959 --> 00:10:11,039 (slurps) Ah, water. 228 00:10:11,125 --> 00:10:12,375 A-Bomb: So thirsty. 229 00:10:13,625 --> 00:10:14,495 (spits) 230 00:10:14,583 --> 00:10:16,293 Yuck. It's slimy. 231 00:10:16,375 --> 00:10:19,325 (spitting) Ugh! Oh! It's drool! 232 00:10:19,542 --> 00:10:21,422 Oh, I put it in my mouth. 233 00:10:21,834 --> 00:10:24,174 (groaning) Oh, it's chunky. 234 00:10:24,542 --> 00:10:27,382 (slurring) I can still taste it on my tongue. Ugh! 235 00:10:28,625 --> 00:10:30,955 Wait, if this is drool, 236 00:10:31,041 --> 00:10:32,671 then we're standing right over Ego's-- 237 00:10:32,750 --> 00:10:34,210 -(rumbling) -Mouth? 238 00:10:34,291 --> 00:10:35,921 Oh, you gotta be... 239 00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:37,250 (all screaming) 240 00:10:38,375 --> 00:10:40,165 (all grunt) 241 00:10:40,542 --> 00:10:43,542 -A-Bomb: Oh, can it get any worse? -(Ego belching) 242 00:10:45,291 --> 00:10:46,251 Ugh. 243 00:10:46,792 --> 00:10:49,712 His breath is even worse than yours, Red. 244 00:10:49,792 --> 00:10:51,422 Hope you get swallowed. 245 00:10:51,500 --> 00:10:55,330 Ego: Now you shall all be devoured! 246 00:10:55,417 --> 00:10:57,127 (rumbling) 247 00:10:57,208 --> 00:10:58,288 (grunts) 248 00:10:59,166 --> 00:11:00,916 A-Bomb, go! 249 00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:02,000 (grunting) 250 00:11:02,542 --> 00:11:04,082 (Ego roaring) 251 00:11:04,166 --> 00:11:05,786 (all grunting) 252 00:11:05,875 --> 00:11:06,825 (grunts) 253 00:11:08,333 --> 00:11:10,173 And... we're trapped. 254 00:11:10,917 --> 00:11:12,577 -(clicks) -(grunts) 255 00:11:14,083 --> 00:11:17,543 And cue the hideous, giant, alien tongue. 256 00:11:18,917 --> 00:11:20,537 (Ego screeching) 257 00:11:23,959 --> 00:11:25,829 -(yelling) -She-Hulk: Hulk! 258 00:11:27,875 --> 00:11:29,165 -(grunts) -(thuds) 259 00:11:30,333 --> 00:11:32,833 (grunting) Feel that, Ego? 260 00:11:33,083 --> 00:11:34,963 -(thudding) -(clanking) 261 00:11:35,041 --> 00:11:38,631 Skaar: Skaar make holes in teeth! Skaar make holes in teeth! 262 00:11:38,709 --> 00:11:40,629 Rick, roll us a path out of here. 263 00:11:40,709 --> 00:11:44,249 (laughing) Yeah! Dr. Mouthbomb reporting for surgery. 264 00:11:44,333 --> 00:11:47,383 Mama always said I'd make a great dentist. 265 00:11:47,458 --> 00:11:49,708 (both grunt) 266 00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:50,962 Hey. 267 00:11:51,875 --> 00:11:54,495 Follow me! I'm leading this cavity cavalry. 268 00:11:55,750 --> 00:11:57,580 -(gunshot) -(rumbles) 269 00:12:04,041 --> 00:12:06,211 A-Bomb: That's kinda impressive on a superhero resume. 270 00:12:06,291 --> 00:12:09,251 "Fought giant teeth the size of the Stark Tower." 271 00:12:09,417 --> 00:12:10,457 Ugh. 272 00:12:10,542 --> 00:12:11,632 -More drool? -(squelching) 273 00:12:11,709 --> 00:12:13,539 Can it get any more disgusting? 274 00:12:14,125 --> 00:12:16,165 Just wait till we get to the nose. 275 00:12:16,250 --> 00:12:17,710 Yuck. 276 00:12:17,792 --> 00:12:20,002 Big head planet has bad skin. 277 00:12:20,250 --> 00:12:22,500 -(squeaking) -(squelching) 278 00:12:22,750 --> 00:12:24,540 -Ugh. Acid! -(fizzes) 279 00:12:25,417 --> 00:12:28,997 Twenty foot acid zits with the pus and... 280 00:12:29,458 --> 00:12:31,208 giant whiteheads. 281 00:12:31,750 --> 00:12:33,080 (gagging) 282 00:12:34,750 --> 00:12:35,790 (retches) 283 00:12:35,875 --> 00:12:37,245 (groans) 284 00:12:37,750 --> 00:12:39,080 (whooshing) 285 00:12:39,417 --> 00:12:40,417 (yells) 286 00:12:43,542 --> 00:12:45,252 Red Hulk: Waste your time on zits. 287 00:12:45,291 --> 00:12:48,171 -I'm heading to the nose! Yeah! -(rapid gunshots) 288 00:12:48,250 --> 00:12:49,960 Red, get back here! 289 00:12:51,542 --> 00:12:54,002 -(zaps) -(splashing) 290 00:12:54,750 --> 00:12:57,290 And I thought I had acne back in high school. 291 00:12:57,583 --> 00:12:59,253 Skaar, make with the boom. 292 00:13:00,041 --> 00:13:01,501 -(grunts) -(squelches) 293 00:13:01,834 --> 00:13:03,214 Epic win, Skaar. 294 00:13:03,291 --> 00:13:05,751 Way to... (gagging) Pop those zits. 295 00:13:05,834 --> 00:13:08,634 Come on. We're getting closer to the earth by the second. 296 00:13:10,667 --> 00:13:11,997 (Ego growling) 297 00:13:12,083 --> 00:13:15,003 Uh, as usual, Greenie's bunch is lagging behind, 298 00:13:15,083 --> 00:13:18,543 so, it's up to me, once again, to get the job done. 299 00:13:18,625 --> 00:13:19,825 Moving out. 300 00:13:20,250 --> 00:13:21,830 (wind howling) 301 00:13:22,458 --> 00:13:24,038 (Red Hulk yelling) 302 00:13:25,417 --> 00:13:26,577 -Ugh! -(squelches) 303 00:13:26,667 --> 00:13:28,077 (growling) 304 00:13:31,625 --> 00:13:34,745 No Green tag-alongs or slimy snot-ridden booger delta's 305 00:13:34,834 --> 00:13:37,084 gonna detain General Thunderbolt Ross. 306 00:13:37,166 --> 00:13:38,376 No siree. 307 00:13:38,709 --> 00:13:40,289 (grunting) Gotta, ugh... 308 00:13:40,375 --> 00:13:42,535 make it... 309 00:13:42,625 --> 00:13:44,495 to brain. 310 00:13:45,166 --> 00:13:47,626 -(beeping) -Wow. I got a message from our fans. 311 00:13:47,875 --> 00:13:48,745 Oh. 312 00:13:49,250 --> 00:13:51,130 Hulk, you better see this. 313 00:13:51,500 --> 00:13:53,080 (people screaming) 314 00:13:56,291 --> 00:13:59,251 Can't take much more of these gravity quakes. 315 00:13:59,291 --> 00:14:01,581 If you haven't signed your will, better get on it. 316 00:14:01,667 --> 00:14:03,537 Turns out the end is near. 317 00:14:04,083 --> 00:14:06,083 We gotta stop Ego. Now. 318 00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:09,460 (straining) 319 00:14:09,542 --> 00:14:12,462 Gonna take more than a mountain of mucus to halt this charge. 320 00:14:12,542 --> 00:14:14,542 Out of the way, nose goblin! 321 00:14:14,875 --> 00:14:17,535 -Burn, you buggers! Burn! -(rapid gunfire) 322 00:14:17,625 --> 00:14:19,955 (laughing) 323 00:14:20,333 --> 00:14:21,753 (squelching) 324 00:14:22,333 --> 00:14:23,713 Come at me. 325 00:14:23,792 --> 00:14:25,332 (grunting) 326 00:14:26,417 --> 00:14:28,877 -Uh! -(sneezing) 327 00:14:28,959 --> 00:14:31,169 -(yelling) -(rumbling) 328 00:14:31,542 --> 00:14:33,332 (rumbling) 329 00:14:33,417 --> 00:14:34,457 Hold on. 330 00:14:35,417 --> 00:14:37,037 (all yelling) 331 00:14:37,542 --> 00:14:40,792 (laughing) 332 00:14:43,291 --> 00:14:44,631 (groaning) 333 00:14:46,625 --> 00:14:50,955 Your pitiful blue orb is soon to be decimated. 334 00:14:51,375 --> 00:14:55,915 Each and every lowly life form extinguished. 335 00:14:56,542 --> 00:14:58,792 Such is my will. 336 00:14:59,041 --> 00:15:02,081 The will of Ego! 337 00:15:03,375 --> 00:15:05,785 Never been trash-talked by a planet before. 338 00:15:06,125 --> 00:15:09,125 Would dish some back, but I need to save my breath. 339 00:15:09,875 --> 00:15:11,875 (tense music) 340 00:15:14,458 --> 00:15:17,168 In the sky you're seeing a hunk of extinction-sized rock 341 00:15:17,250 --> 00:15:18,670 racing into our zip code. 342 00:15:18,750 --> 00:15:21,380 -(people screaming) -(sirens wailing) 343 00:15:24,917 --> 00:15:28,207 (muffled yelling) 344 00:15:30,125 --> 00:15:31,955 (squelching) 345 00:15:33,291 --> 00:15:35,501 (groans) 346 00:15:35,583 --> 00:15:37,543 -She-Hulk: Skaar! -Huh? 347 00:15:38,333 --> 00:15:40,633 -(squelches) -Aah! 348 00:15:42,583 --> 00:15:44,543 (retching) 349 00:15:44,625 --> 00:15:45,495 Oh! 350 00:15:45,583 --> 00:15:47,883 I'm gonna have booger breath for a month. 351 00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:49,040 She-Hulk: Tell me about it. 352 00:15:49,458 --> 00:15:51,748 -Wait. What happened to Hulk? -(squelching) 353 00:15:52,458 --> 00:15:55,498 (grunting) 354 00:15:57,000 --> 00:15:59,880 astronaut 1: Negative, control. Still no sign of the Hulks. 355 00:16:01,041 --> 00:16:03,081 astronaut 2: Wait a minute. What is that? 356 00:16:03,166 --> 00:16:04,576 astronaut 1: It's him. 357 00:16:04,917 --> 00:16:07,037 astronaut 2: What's he doing out here? 358 00:16:07,291 --> 00:16:08,631 (grunting) 359 00:16:09,291 --> 00:16:10,541 Got it. 360 00:16:11,709 --> 00:16:13,709 astronaut 2: Three, two, one... 361 00:16:13,792 --> 00:16:15,042 Hulk away. 362 00:16:15,125 --> 00:16:17,165 (roaring) 363 00:16:17,458 --> 00:16:20,128 (rumbling) 364 00:16:22,208 --> 00:16:23,918 That's gonna leave a mark. 365 00:16:24,125 --> 00:16:26,205 (grunts) It's official. 366 00:16:26,291 --> 00:16:27,881 I'm mad. 367 00:16:32,333 --> 00:16:34,383 Hulk: Hoof it, Hulks. We're running out of time. 368 00:16:34,458 --> 00:16:35,628 She-Hulk: Well... 369 00:16:35,917 --> 00:16:38,377 look where the lone-wolf cowboy landed. 370 00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:42,753 -Red. Slimed. -(grunting) 371 00:16:42,834 --> 00:16:44,544 Can we pick him up on the way back? 372 00:16:44,625 --> 00:16:46,995 Like it or not, he's one of us. 373 00:16:47,083 --> 00:16:49,463 Agents of S.M.A.S.H. look out for each other, Jen. 374 00:16:49,875 --> 00:16:52,125 Spoken like a true superhero. 375 00:16:53,125 --> 00:16:54,285 -(grunting) -(squelching) 376 00:16:54,667 --> 00:16:56,127 (sputtering) 377 00:16:56,208 --> 00:16:58,918 What are you goons doing here? I got this. 378 00:16:59,291 --> 00:17:01,131 (chuckling) Seriously? 379 00:17:01,208 --> 00:17:03,328 Yeah. I'll show you all. 380 00:17:03,417 --> 00:17:04,537 (growling) 381 00:17:04,625 --> 00:17:05,745 (yells) 382 00:17:06,917 --> 00:17:08,037 (whimpers) 383 00:17:08,125 --> 00:17:08,995 (thuds) 384 00:17:09,083 --> 00:17:10,543 Can't do everything, Red. 385 00:17:10,625 --> 00:17:13,625 And I'm done watching you try while the team gets hurt. 386 00:17:13,709 --> 00:17:15,879 Okay, so what's your big plan? 387 00:17:16,250 --> 00:17:18,460 Only way to the brain is through the sinuses. 388 00:17:18,542 --> 00:17:19,962 But it's closed up. 389 00:17:20,625 --> 00:17:22,575 Skaar: Hulk smash nose hole? 390 00:17:22,625 --> 00:17:23,785 Hulk: Not quite. 391 00:17:23,875 --> 00:17:26,495 But this time, we do it together. 392 00:17:26,583 --> 00:17:29,293 Come on, Hulks. Yank this nose hair. 393 00:17:29,417 --> 00:17:30,957 This is stupid. 394 00:17:31,041 --> 00:17:33,881 You're gonna get us all snot-rocketed when he sneezes again. 395 00:17:34,250 --> 00:17:35,500 (groans) 396 00:17:37,208 --> 00:17:38,418 (splashes) 397 00:17:38,750 --> 00:17:41,040 (Ego groaning) 398 00:17:44,125 --> 00:17:46,915 -Red, hurry! Grab on. -Yeah. 399 00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:48,750 Can't sneeze without opening the sinuses. 400 00:17:48,834 --> 00:17:50,714 (sneezing) 401 00:17:50,792 --> 00:17:53,542 -(wind howling) -(all yelling) 402 00:17:55,875 --> 00:17:57,035 -(thuds) -(all grunt) 403 00:17:57,250 --> 00:17:58,580 Gesundheit. 404 00:17:58,667 --> 00:18:01,497 Okay, mega sneeze avoided. Now what? 405 00:18:02,542 --> 00:18:03,712 The fun part. 406 00:18:03,834 --> 00:18:05,294 We keep smashing. 407 00:18:05,750 --> 00:18:08,290 -(all grunting) -(thumping) 408 00:18:09,375 --> 00:18:12,285 (Ego groaning) 409 00:18:14,959 --> 00:18:16,749 -(rumbling) -(all grunt) 410 00:18:17,166 --> 00:18:22,456 Ego: You are stepping on the biggest brain in the known universe. 411 00:18:22,542 --> 00:18:26,882 The greatest mind in all of reality. 412 00:18:27,166 --> 00:18:28,496 (whirring) 413 00:18:28,834 --> 00:18:33,424 You go no further! 414 00:18:33,542 --> 00:18:35,002 Shiny. 415 00:18:35,959 --> 00:18:37,379 -(zaps) -(all grunt) 416 00:18:37,750 --> 00:18:39,710 That's two you owe me, Red. 417 00:18:40,166 --> 00:18:45,246 Bow down to Ego and your end will be swift. 418 00:18:45,583 --> 00:18:46,753 Never! 419 00:18:47,333 --> 00:18:48,633 (roaring) 420 00:18:51,083 --> 00:18:52,463 -(thuds) -(whirs) 421 00:18:52,542 --> 00:18:54,632 (zaps) 422 00:18:59,583 --> 00:19:02,293 (crackling) 423 00:19:02,834 --> 00:19:05,004 (rumbling) 424 00:19:07,250 --> 00:19:09,080 (chuckling) After you, fearless leader. 425 00:19:09,166 --> 00:19:10,956 -(thuds) -Whoa! 426 00:19:11,041 --> 00:19:12,671 Whoo-hoo-hoo! 427 00:19:12,750 --> 00:19:14,880 -(grunting) -(sighs) 428 00:19:16,083 --> 00:19:17,003 (grunting) 429 00:19:17,083 --> 00:19:18,673 Red Hulk: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! 430 00:19:18,750 --> 00:19:19,580 -(grunts) -(thuds) 431 00:19:19,667 --> 00:19:20,997 (all grunting) 432 00:19:21,083 --> 00:19:22,293 (grunting) 433 00:19:22,375 --> 00:19:23,535 Bouncy. 434 00:19:24,208 --> 00:19:25,828 (Ego in high-pitched voice) Look away, insects. 435 00:19:25,917 --> 00:19:27,417 -I command you. -(crackling) 436 00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:28,500 Keep away from me. 437 00:19:28,583 --> 00:19:32,833 Yep. It's the dudes with the biggest Egos that are usually the biggest pinheads. 438 00:19:32,917 --> 00:19:34,627 That's what he was all along? 439 00:19:34,709 --> 00:19:37,169 A tiny Ego inside a giant planet head? 440 00:19:37,250 --> 00:19:40,290 -Wouldn't you know? -You two have a lot in common. 441 00:19:40,542 --> 00:19:41,632 (grunts) 442 00:19:41,709 --> 00:19:43,789 Yes, Red monster, 443 00:19:44,291 --> 00:19:46,041 you are powerful like Ego. 444 00:19:46,625 --> 00:19:49,285 Join Ego and we shall rule the universe. 445 00:19:49,792 --> 00:19:50,922 (nervous giggling) 446 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:52,880 Put a sock in it, squeaky. 447 00:19:53,250 --> 00:19:54,880 I learned my lesson. 448 00:19:54,959 --> 00:19:57,669 There's no "I" in the Agents of S.M.A.S.H. 449 00:19:58,125 --> 00:20:00,125 (heroic music) 450 00:20:01,250 --> 00:20:02,710 Stay back. 451 00:20:02,917 --> 00:20:04,747 (whimpering) Help me. Ah! 452 00:20:06,125 --> 00:20:07,955 -(crackling) -(snaps) 453 00:20:08,583 --> 00:20:10,333 You got two choices. 454 00:20:10,375 --> 00:20:14,075 A, you get us back to earth and leave our galaxy forever. 455 00:20:14,166 --> 00:20:17,666 Or, B, we slam-dunk you into the sun. 456 00:20:17,750 --> 00:20:18,960 What'll it be? 457 00:20:20,291 --> 00:20:21,421 Uh... 458 00:20:21,500 --> 00:20:23,080 Ego submits. 459 00:20:23,166 --> 00:20:24,036 Great. 460 00:20:24,250 --> 00:20:26,080 Uh, so how do we get home? 461 00:20:27,041 --> 00:20:28,921 I think I can get us a ride. 462 00:20:29,875 --> 00:20:30,785 (groaning) 463 00:20:30,875 --> 00:20:32,575 (thumping) 464 00:20:34,166 --> 00:20:35,496 (sighs) 465 00:20:35,583 --> 00:20:37,503 Skaar: Bad planet goes away. 466 00:20:37,583 --> 00:20:40,003 She-Hulk: And not a minute too soon. 467 00:20:40,417 --> 00:20:42,417 (heroic music) 468 00:20:44,333 --> 00:20:46,423 Looks like you Hulks saved the day. 469 00:20:46,500 --> 00:20:47,960 (people cheering) 470 00:20:51,291 --> 00:20:53,381 Spider-man's plot has failed. 471 00:20:53,458 --> 00:20:55,288 The planetoid has missed the earth. 472 00:20:55,375 --> 00:20:58,575 Ah. Guess we can thank chance for this one. 473 00:20:58,667 --> 00:21:01,287 I can't believe we're not getting credit for this. 474 00:21:01,417 --> 00:21:02,787 -(thuds) -(groans) 475 00:21:02,875 --> 00:21:04,495 Hulk: Check your ego at the door. 476 00:21:04,583 --> 00:21:06,463 We did this 'cause it was the right thing, 477 00:21:06,542 --> 00:21:08,252 not to get you a parade. 478 00:21:08,291 --> 00:21:09,291 (scoffs) 479 00:21:10,083 --> 00:21:11,753 Do I like Green? 480 00:21:12,417 --> 00:21:13,327 Nah. 481 00:21:14,542 --> 00:21:16,132 But do I respect him? 482 00:21:17,625 --> 00:21:19,035 Yeah, okay. 483 00:21:19,750 --> 00:21:20,960 Got me there. 484 00:21:21,583 --> 00:21:23,333 Hmm. (chuckling) 485 00:21:23,417 --> 00:21:25,327 Guess it took a planet to show Red 486 00:21:25,417 --> 00:21:27,127 just how big his head is... 487 00:21:27,542 --> 00:21:29,542 and us to bring it down to size. 488 00:21:30,542 --> 00:21:31,712 Hulk out. 489 00:21:33,875 --> 00:21:35,875 (closing theme music) 33363

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