Original subtitles

♪♪ [theme]

♪ Kick, kick ♪

♪ Kick, kick, kick ♪

♪ Kick Buttowski

♪ Kick ♪

♪ Kick ♪

♪ Kick Buttowski ♪

♪ Kick, kick ♪

♪ Kick, kick ♪ ♪ Kick Buttowski ♪

♪ Kick, kick ♪

♪ Kick, kick ♪

♪ Kick ♪

♪ Kick ♪

♪ Kick Buttowski ♪

♪ Kick Buttowski ♪

[crash]

♪ A camping we will go ♪

♪ A camping we will go ♪

♪ Hi-ho, the derry-o ♪

♪ A camping we will go ♪

Sing that song one more time,

and a-barfing I will go.

Tonight it’s Kick versus Wild.

[Australian accent] Are you ready to camp? Yes.

Then get out of the comfort of the cul-de-sac

and tame the wilderness

like me, Jock Wilder, extreme nature guy.

I went into the woods as a little baby,

and I came out a man!

[Harold Buttowski] Here we are, kids--

[tires screech]

...the wilderness.

Today Kick Buttowski becomes--

Oh, man.

Oh, roughing it sure is fun, huh, kids?

No offense, Mom, but this isn’t roughing it.

I should be camping for real,

like Jock Wilder, extreme nature guy.

Hey, Kick, what’s up?

I’ve never been tested in the comfort of the cul-de-sac.

I need to get out there and tame the wilderness

and come back a man.

[microwave beeping] Hotdogs are ready.

[sighs] Just one night

by myself

in the woods.

I don’t know, Kick.

Camping on a camping trip?

Oh, let the boy have fun.

I remember sleeping out under the stars when I was his age.

Whoa, Dad,

weren’t you scared the dinosaurs would get you? [cackles]

Well? Well, I don’t know.

[animal growls]

Oh, I suppose it’s okay.

Oh, yeah.

Now, you’ll need a hat, gloves, jacket,

and trail mix-- oh-- and peanuts, a nut log,

two pairs of socks, hiking boots, walking stick,

sleeping bag, tent, flashlight, batteries-- ooh-- extra batteries,

and don’t forget your dental floss.

Oh, and some moist towelettes in case your hands--

[grunts]

[owl hoots]

[crashes, birds squeal] All I need to survive in the wild is in my gut.

Of course, dental hygiene is important.

[bird warbling]

Let the camping begin.

[faint scream]

[whispering] Dill weed.

Hello?

[whispers louder] Dill weed.

Whatever you are, come out and fight like a man.

[grunting]

[laughs] Yeah, Brad.

Get back to the RV before you embarrass yourself, Brad.

You don’t belong out in the wilderness.

You call this the wilderness?

More like wilder-less.

See for yourself.

Hi, Kick, honey. We’re right here, son.

[growls]

Mom told me to keep an eye on you

or fill your miserable little life with pain and suffering.

I can’t remember which.

[laughs] Yeah, I wonder whose Mr. Nutty bar this is.

Don’t open that. Animals can smell food a mile away.

You were warned.

[laughs]

Oh, no, you were right, Kick.

The big, scary squirrel is going to eat us.

Look at me. I’m Kick, and I’m afraid of little baby squirrels.

You’re such a dill weed.

[echoing]

[bear roaring]

Is that all you got?

[growls]

[passes gas]

[sniffs, growls]

[chuckles] I took care of him.

[yells] Help!

This could get interesting.

[gasps]

Did I give him floss?

Shh. There, there, honey.

I’m sure Kick’s okay.

After all, he’s with his big, brave brother.

Help me!

Brad. Help!

Life without Brad.

Kick!

Hm, a kid can dream.

[screams]

[gasps]

You dill weed, now we’re lost in the stupid wilderness

with no sign of civilization.

Finally.

Hey, why aren’t we going back?

I’ve already been that way.

I’m going this way,

the extreme way.

Well, I’m going back the way we came.

[growling]

Uh, but you need protecting.

[howls]

Is that really necessary?

It’s the call of the wild.

You wouldn’t understand.

What I don’t understand

is how are we going to get over this gorge?

Leave that to me.

Kick, don’t leave me!

Grab on.

[grunts]

[grunts]

[yelps]

[grunting]

And now to get some grub.

Gotcha!

Gonna eat me some squirrel stew.

Huh?

[rumbling] Kick, did you find something to eat?

[rumbling]

[screams]

We’re-- We’re going to eat a moose?

No, he stole my berries.

We should be asleep in our nice, comfortable beds,

but you wanted to spend the night in the stupid woods

because of that stupid TV show.

What are you doing? Building shelter.

You call this shelter?

More like, I don’t know,

something lame.

I’m so hungry I can’t even make fun of you.

Listen up, Brad.

I came out here to tame the wilderness,

and that’s what I’m going to do.

Termites, you know, the edible kind.

Don’t worry. [gulps]

You’ll get used to it.

I don’t need your shelter

or your termites. [scoffs]

[grunting]

Yuck.

[thunder cracks]

Brad, do you-- do you want to share the shelter?

No way.

I got me a nice, soft pillow right here.

Ow.

Brad, you need shelter.

I can’t afford to carry you all the way back.

Mm, comfy.

And I got this lush, natural blanket.

Mm, so soft on my skin.

Bet you wish you had my warm, cozy blanket.

Yeah, Brad.

That’s right, Brad. I wish I could have a blanket made of poison ivy.

Poison ivy?

[screams]

Sunrise.

Today I am a man.

How did I get in here?

I brought you in.

You-- You did that for me?

Don’t touch me.

Come on, Brad. I’ve conquered nature.

Now it’s time to go home.

But there’s poison ivy on my poison oak.

Savor the victory, Brad.

We survived a night in the wilderness,

and now all we have to do is make it back alive.

[screams]

What’s this quickie-sandy gunk?

Quicksand. [screams]

Help! Someone! Anyone!

Quit flailing. You’re making it worse.

Listen, I-- I’m sorry.

I mean, I really screwed things up for us.

I’m sorry I called you a dill weed all those times.

I don’t-- I don’t even know what a dill weed is.

It’s a perennial herb.

You’re a-- You’re a good brother.

Never thought I’d go this way.

Swallowing dynamite, sure,

but quicksand? What about me?

Covered in boils, itchy poison ivy,

and there’s a termite stuck in my teeth.

[whimpers]

There we go, all packed up.

Oh, where are Kick and Brad?

We have to check out soon.

[gasps] They’re gone.

I knew I should have given them the moist towelettes.

Mom, I’m back.

Oh, Kick, there you are, baby.

I’m no baby.

I’m a man.

Oh.

Who’s my little man?

I am.

Mommy! It’s me, Brad.

Great, kids.

Next time maybe you can stay 30 feet away.

Kick, that stuff I said in the quicksand?

[Kick] Yeah?

[smacks Kick] It never happened.

You’re still just my perennial herb brother.

[Kick] Oh, come on, Mom.

Why do you got to keep a boy down?

[barking]

Oh, Kick, you only have to watch Oskar for a few hours

while Mrs. Chicarelli and I play in our shuffleboard tournament.

What about Mr. Vickle? He’s getting his hair dyed.

Ooh, lovely.

Brad? [Honey] Studying.

[belches]

Kendall? It’s her birthday party.

I don’t think this is a good idea.

Oh, nonsense. It’ll be fun.

We’ll be back at 7:30.

Have a good time.

How I let your mother convince me

to let you take care of my dear, sweet Oskar

is beyond me.

Here.

[reads]

You will bathe him, you will feed him,

and you will walk him,

and let me be clear.

Anything happens to my precious puppy,

and I’ll see to it you are grounded for life.

I don’t respond well to threats.

Not a threat. A fact.

Okay, snookums,

give Mommy a kiss.

Oh, yeah, yeah. [babbles]

Remember...

Where did he go?

Biscuits.

Thanks for helping me out, Gunther.

My pleasure.

I’ve always wanted to see the inside of snitchy’s house.

Ooh, fruit.

[squeaking]

Mm, waxy.

[Oskar chomps, growling]

Okay, Oskar, and you don’t like me,

so it’s up to you.

Are we going to do this the easy way

or the hard way?

That’s a good--

Hard way it is, then.

[pans clanging]

[Kick] You stubborn little--

Come on, eat your dinner.

Hang on. I have an idea.

Look here, Oskar. It smells really good.

I bet it tastes even better.

Mm, yum, yum, yum.

Wow, this does smell good.

Gunther! Oh, sorry.

[growling] Get in the tub.

[Gunther] Come on, Oskar.

I put in chamomile and bath salts.

It’s dreamy.

Oopsy.

Okay, Oskar, time for your--

[squishes] ...ew, walk.

Not on the carpet.

Bad boy. Bad boy.

"Oskar likes to take a mellow stroll."

You don’t want to just take a stroll, do you?

You want to go for a run.

What are you doing? Miss Chicarelli said mellow.

That’s one thing Oskar and I have in common.

We don’t do mellow.

[Gunther screaming]

I thought he liked it mellow.

Snitchy just never let Oskar hit the gas.

Right, Oskar?

[Gunther yells]

[grunts]

[yells]

Now, that’s what I call walking the dog.

You’re okay, kid.

Did he just smile?

See what happens when we loosen the leash a little?

Too many restrictions keep a dog down.

[barks]

Come to think of it, Oskar,

you kind of remind me of someone.

Eat your dinner.

Get in the tub.

Not on the carpet. Bad boy.

Bad boy.

I never realized it before,

but you and me, we’re a special breed.

[growling]

Poor guy, he must have flees.

No, he’s just itching to get off his leash.

Are you crazy?

He’ll bolt, and you’ll be grounded for life.

No, we have an understanding.

We have trust, and we have--

We have a problem. He’ll be back.

I don’t think he’s-- He’ll be back.

[bird twitters]

Come on.

Kick, if we don’t get that dog back soon,

you’ll be grounded for life.

Just keep your eyes open.

Look.

Typical Oskar--

leaving a trail of destruction everywhere he goes.

Wow, we really are alike.

Dog. Dog. [whimpering] Horrible.

[people yelling]

Bingo.

Why even bother? Oskar will probably run home at some point.

Because, Gunther, I promised to watch him.

Oskar’s my responsibility, and I take my responsibilities seriously.

[people gasping]

[horn honks]

[honks]

[Gunther] "Mellowbrook Pound."

The big house, clink, the pokey, the gray-bar hotel--

Gunther, I get it.

So what’s the plan, you go in there and sign Oskar out?

That means paperwork, red tape.

I don’t have that kind of time. You mean--

I’m going in. Kick, no, it’s too dangerous.

I have no choice, Gunther.

[sighs] Then you’re going to need this.

Why do you have the complete schematic

of the Mellowbrook Dog Pound drawn on your back?

There’s some things even friends don’t share.

Hm, if this map is correct,

then there’s a rooftop service grate

between my shoulder blades.

Here? Up. Now to the left.

A little more. Little more. And--

Oh-- Oh, yeah. That’s the spot.

[delirious] The service grate. Ah.

I don’t get it, Kick. Why do you want to save this mutt?

All he’s ever done is brought you grief.

I didn’t get it myself, Gunther,

but I looked into that puppy’s eyes,

and I saw his soul.

We’re the same, me and him,

two sides of one coin,

brothers from a different mother.

You’re right, Kick. Go get him.

Gunther? Just trying to help.

[barking]

Oskar.

Oskar, come on. We’re going home.

[grunting]

Oh, biscuits.

[grunts]

Come on. What are you waiting for?

You want out of there, you got to help me.

Where’s the Oskar I know and hate?

The Oskar who leaves a trail of terror

everywhere he goes?

The Oskar who lives to

bite my Buttowski?

Here, doggie, doggie, doggie, doggie.

Come and get it.

[chomps]

Well played, my friend.

Now, let’s get you home.

All right, Kick,

I knew you could do it.

You broke him out of the slammer,

the joint, the hoosegow,

the cement condo--

Gunther. Sorry.

Well, it’s getting late.

You ready to go, Oskar?

Biscuits.

Oskar, come back here. Come back.

[brakes squeak]

Aha!

I knew Kick would mess this up.

Oh, I’m sure they’re around.

[panting]

Miss Chicarelli,

I’ve got to tell you something.

Oskar is--

he’s-- well--

Yes, what is it?

He, uh-- [Oskar yelps]

He’s right here.

Thanks, Oskar.

[barks]

Oh, Oskar, my little baby.

I don’t believe it. You didn’t mess it up.

Now, what was it you wanted to tell me?

Just that everything’s cool between Oskar and me.

We have an understanding, don’t we?

[chomps]

Oh, biscuits.

[machine whirring]

[sighs] I guess it’s a good thing I’m the sidekick.

Closed-Captioned By J.R. Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA