Original subtitles

(BUBBLING)

-(SONG BEGINS) -One, two, three, four

Who's that knocking at my door?

Five, six, seven, eight

Hurry up and don't be late

Nine, ten, eleven, twelve

Got a secret I can't tell

Flap your fins, flip your tail

School's out, ring the bell

La, la, la, la

Ooh

La, la, la, la

Ooh

La, la, la, la

Ooh

La, la, la, la

Ooh

One, two, three, four

Who's that knocking at my door?

Five, six, seven, eight

Hurry up and don't be late

Nine, ten, eleven, twelve

Got a secret I can't tell

Flap your fins, flip your tail

School's out, ring the bell!

(SONG ENDS)

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

(KIDS CHEERING, CHATTING)

Let me off this thing!

Ow, oooh!

What? (YELPS)

(LAUGHING)

Oh, how I love chaperoning field trips.

Remember, class, only bother me if it's an emergency.

'Kay, girls!

So I figure we can start by doing a lap around the park looking cute,

and then ride a couple rides.

And then two more cute laps, and then we'll break for lunch.

I'm gonna get a burger, a big one.

Let's do this thing! (GROANS)

Oops. (GASPS)

(ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING)

-Steve Jackson. I'm sorry. -No sweat, Bea.

The important thing is no one was hurt.

Hey, I gotta go help some underprivileged children right now,

But maybe we can ride a ride together later.

-Rides are cool. -Did you hear that, girls?

He said he wants to ride a ride with me! Me!

Yay!

I am going to get that ride next to Steve Jackson.

-(ALL LAUGH) Steve Jackson. -Steve Jackson's out of my league.

I won't let you down, girls.

You can all live through me.

Hey, where'd he go?

Oh, oh, and then, Oscar, I'm gonna ride a roller coaster like this!

(SCREAMING)

And all the honeys will be like, "Grrrr, who's that macho guy?"

Ha! Your little baby stomach can't handle any of the rides here, Milo.

Only real macho guys like me can do that.

Nuh-uh, Randy!

I'm way more of a macho guy than you.

Yeah right.

I bet you'd go barfy on the first scary ride you were on.

No, I bet you'd do that!

Well, how about this?

I challenge you to a macho guy ride-off.

We ride the scariest rides in the park,

first guy who barfs loses!

Let's do this.

(SCREAMING)

JUMBO: Psst! Oscar.

We must show you something.

OSCAR: Oh, my golly!

You can win a Galactic Fish Battles limited edition fork saber here?

Yeah, and the best part is everyone keeps winning.

HUMBLE HARRY: That's right, kids.

Everyone wins at Humble Harry's cup game.

Because if I don't make others happy, then I don't feel happy.

-(LAUGHING) -(TEETH SNAP)

It's a serious medical condition. (CHUCKLES)

-(CREAKING) -(GROANS)

Oh my goodness, my back.

-(SIREN WAILS) -I did it!

Ohhh! (CHUCKLES)

Thank you, thank you.

-I won me a fork! -So what do you say, fellas?

-(HARRY LAUGHS) -All right!

Yes!

-Yay! (LAUGHS) -(GRUNTS)

-Uh... -(GRUNTS)

Oh, oh dear.

(GRUNTS)

-(SHRIEKS) It's coming back! -(WHIMPERING)

No one's leaving till you knock down the cups!

-(GIGGLING) -Hey, girls!

-Anything to report? -Uh, yes.

Steve Jackson was not at the fried ice cream stand.

-(FRUSTRATED GROAN) -Girl,

I know where I would be if I were Steve Jackson.

-Right in front of a mirror. -That's it, Shellsea!

The Pupu House of Mirrors.

-Just staring at a mirror. -Come on!

Just staring at it.

(SCREAMING)

There's no way I'm getting on that thing!

(SCREAMS) I don't wanna die!

Of embarrassment...

for riding such a pathetic baby ride.

What do you say we do something more manly?

(LAUGHING)

(SCREAMING)

(SCREAMING AND LAUGHING)

(MUSIC PLAYING)

You're starting to feel queasy.

Apples!

What the dickens?

You monster!

(LAUGHS) I'm Randy Pinch...

(GAGS, MOANS)

(CHEERING)

All right, Steve has got to be in here.

-Keep your eyes peeled, Shell. -Got it.

Hi there, Hottie.

Oh my gosh, Shellsea, he's here.

Oh, and there's a whole hunking lot of him.

SHELLSEA: Yum.

Well, I only need one of him to ride with me.

Hey, Steve.

Darn it!

Hi, Steve. (GIGGLES)

Darn it! This might be a lot darn harder than I thought it'd be.

Ooh, I know!

Maybe I can sing a song that touches Steve when he hears it

so he comes looking for me.

-Hey, girl, Steve just left. -Darn it!

(GRUNTING)

You hug your mama with those arms?

(LAUGHS, WHEEZES)

(GROANING)

(BOTH GRUNTING)

It's no use.

Your throws are too inaccurate, mine aren't strong enough

and Albert's having his own problems.

(GROANING) Somebody help me!

I guess we were never meant to own fork sabers.

Perhaps I could just give you boys the fork sabers?

A reward not earned is not a reward at all.

But you're so unhappy!

All right, so we need to think of another way to knock over those cups.

(GRUNTS) Guys!

Oscar's throws are weak, but very accurate.

So what if we got some assistance to help with his velocity?

-Like from a fast machine? -Yeah!

-Albert, you little ball-covered genius. -(GIGGLES)

(SCREAMING)

(CHILDREN GIGGLING)

Oh, those seashells are killer. (GROANS)

Yeah, tell me about it.

I almost lost my lunch a couple of...

Uh, I mean, pshh! Bring it on!

I'm not even close to barfing.

You are indeed a worthy foe, Milo.

But our little dance of doom needs to come to an end.

Pick another ride!

Hmm, hmm...

(CHUCKLES) Looks like we've ridden everything,

except...

Except what? Oh.

(LOUD FAIRGROUND MUSIC)

-You scared? -No.

Neither am I. 'Cause you know, if you were scared,

I'd say we can call it a draw.

-I'm getting in line. -Darn it!

ALBERT: Guys, if my calculations are correct...

They always are.

...Oscar should be able to knock over the cups

while throwing from the Pu-Panator.

Uh, yeah, great.

Say, the Pu-Panator is kinda fast, huh?

(SCREAMING)

Fear not, Oscar. You just have to use the force.

(LAUGHS) You know, the force of the coaster rolling down the tracks.

(TEARFUL) Well, the park's going to close soon.

I guess I'm not going to get that ride with him after all.

You know, maybe it's for the best.

I mean, once you get lost in his dreamy eyes,

it's so hard to get back out.

(SONG BEGINS)

(SINGING) You are the waves in my ocean

The current in my sea

Can't you see me, the real Bea?

-The treasure in my chest... -(SONG ENDS)

-Stop! Come back to us. -Huh? What?

Bea, listen to yourself.

You are being desperate.

That is never attractive, girl.

Stop being a princess in a tower with your long princess hair

and your princess face.

SHELLSEA: The day is not over yet.

Get out there and get what you want.

You're right! I am not giving up.

I'm going to find that man

and get the quality time with him that I deserve!

Go get 'em, girl.

And then bring him back here so he can sit on my lap.

Wow, wow...

(GROANS) I'm never gonna find him in this crowd.

Hmm?

(GASPS) There he is! In line.

Hey, Clamantha.

So I was just wondering

what I would have to offer in order for you to let me cut in line.

Yeah right, as if. Whatever.

Talk to the hand. My spot in line is not for sale.

-I'll get you a chunk of Oscar's hair. -Enjoy the ride.

Visualize.

-We're on the ride. -We're on the ride.

-We're at the apex. -We're at the apex.

-We're going over! -We're dropping, we're dropping.

I'm crying, I'm crying!

Hey, I'm just going to sneak in front of you boys

so I can ride with the hunk. Thanks.

-What? -(SCREAMING)

(GULPING)

-Hey, boys, can I cut in line? -Yes, yes, yes!

Thanks.

It's the right thing to do, you know. She's a lady.

-(NERVOUS GIGGLE) -Totally.

No pregnant seahorses.

Well, my day is just complete.

-Excuse me. -(CRASHES)

BEA: Oh hey, Steve.

I had no idea you were on this ride.

Hey, Bea. Yeah, rides are cool.

BEA: Oh my gosh,

I'm finally about to spend some time with Steve Jackson!

Yes, yes, yes!

Let's get this thing moving!

-(GIGGLING) -(OSCAR GROANS)

-You're gonna vomit. -No, you're gonna vomit!

No, you're gonna vomit!

JUMBO: Whoa!

(TEETH CHATTERING)

(CHUCKLING)

(GROANS)

So, Steve, what kind of movies do you like?

(SCREAMING)

(TEETH CHATTERING)

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)

(SCREAMING)

(SCREAMING)

(LAUGHING)

-Whoo! -(WHIMPERING)

Well, blue is my favorite color,

but I think they're all pretty great.

(SCREAMS)

-Oscar, now! -(GRUNTS)

Hey!

ALL: Yeah!

-(VOMITS) -Hurray!

This is the best day ever!

(CAMERA CLICKS)

(SCREAMS) I did it!

(SINGSONG) I got my ride with Steve!

I knew you could, girl.

Too bad about the hair.

Say it, Randy!

Say I'm the machoest of macho men!

(SHRIEKS)

I'm Randy Pincherson!

-(GIGGLING) -(FORK HUMS)

(SIGHS) I didn't even get to go on one lousy ride.

-One ride coming up. (LAUGHS) -(SCREAMS)

(LOUD FAIRGROUND MUSIC)

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

-(CAT YOWLS) -(SCREAMS)

(MILO BABBLING)

I'm a crazy guy.

Milo, why do you keep doing that?

You're weirding me out.

It's my impression of Mr. Mussels, dude.

Check it out! (BABBLING) Eh?

I don't get it.

-Hey guys! -Oh, Bea!

Check this out, check this out. (BABBLING)

O.M.G., rabies! I'm calling the nurse's office.

What? Why can't anyone get my awesome impressions?

Well, maybe if you didn't do them all with a Swedish accent.

Oh, Oscar, remember that time

you imitated the Queen of Fish England in history class?

(CHUCKLING) You? Not a chance!

Oh, go on, Oscar. Show him.

No, it's not really that good.

It is so good.

In fact, it's kinda cute.

(SNEEZES)

So like... Oh!

(SNAPPING)

Whoa, I don't believe it.

(BRITISH ACCENT) Well, you'd better believe it,

for I am the Queen of Fish England!

Whoo-hoo-hoo, it crisps me crumpets.

Oh my gosh, the Queen of Fish England.

Oh, I can't believe Oscar isn't here to see this!

Milo, that is Oscar!

I told you he did an awesome impression.

-Hi, Milo. -(SHRIEKS)

Teatime! Where are me crumpets?

Whoo-hoo-hoo, check me out, I'm the queen.

-(GRUNTS) -(GROWLS)

O.M.G., the Queen of Fish England is here at Freshwater High.

Oh, how I love the fancy British ladies.

It would be my honor to show you around town

in my limousine.

And we'll go too!

You know, to be fabulous in the limo.

(NORMAL VOICE) No, no, no, no, no, I can't!

I mean, uh...

(BRITISH ACCENT) Unfortunately the Queen must fly back to Fish England tonight.

Perfect! I'll drive.

(SCREAMING) No!

-("RULE BRITANNIA" PLAYING) -(TIRES SQUEALING)

(GLASS SHATTERS)

(OSCAR SCREAMING)

(GLASS SHATTERS)

-(OSCAR SCREAMING) -(TIRES SQUEALING)

(TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING)

Isn't this great?

Great? Are you out of your mind?

It's only a matter of time before Mr. Mussels figures out

I'm not really the queen.

Not a chance, bro.

Besides he'll be too busy driving us around town.

(SONG BEGINS)

(SINGING) O.M.G., it's paparazzi

Front row seats, what can I say?

Me and my friends having so much fun

Roller-coaster rides And then the wax museum

It's good to be the queen

It's good to be the queen

It's good to be the queen

It's good to be the queen...

(SONG ENDS)

-(MUSIC PLAYING) -(ROOSTER CROWS)

Dude, you have got to admit that was the best night ever!

(NORMAL VOICE) Okay, you were right. It was.

(BRITISH ACCENT) And I do fancy this giant foam finger I got.

And it's all because of you

-and your impression, Oscar. -Really?

BEA: I can't wait to do it all again tomorrow!

-Oh! -BOTH: Oscar?

Oh no, I'm done being the queen.

But I thought you said you had fun?

Don't you want to eat, dance, and party all over again?

No, I don't! I mean, sure, it was fun,

but I can't keep pretending I'm someone else.

Why not?

I mean, what could be more fun?

I don't know.

I was thinking maybe we could just, you know,

forget all this queen stuff and just go home?

Heat up some fish flake puffs and watch TV,

like we always do.

(BOTH SNORING)

Oh, real funny.

You know, I think you guys like me better when I'm the queen.

Well, I mean, there is a lot more free food when she's here.

See? You do like her better! Well, forget you guys then.

(BRITISH ACCENT) I'll just go home by meself!

-What? -What about us?

-Oscar, wait. -Oscar, come back!

-BOTH: Wait! -(CAR HONKING)

Hey, where's the queen?

I was supposed to pick her up here.

-(CUPS CLINKING) -(ALL SIPPING)

Uh, I think I'm in the wrong limo.

(LAUGHING)

Droll, delightfully droll, your majesty.

But where have you been? We've been looking for you for hours.

I only hope we're not too late.

Late? What are we late for?

(LAUGHING, LOUD SLURPING)

So where do you think Oscar went in such a hurry?

-The Queen! -Oh yeah, Queen Oscar.

There's the limo, parked in front of that building.

That's Fishminster Abbey.

But people only go there to get...

Married? I can't get married.

-(ALL LAUGHING) -Oh, your majesty,

I said the same thing before I married wrinkly old Count Ipswich.

It's just a case of cold fins.

You don't understand. I'm not really the queen.

-I'm just a kid. -WOMAN: Wise words indeed, Your Highness.

We are all just children at heart on our wedding day. (CHUCKLES)

(BELLS RINGING)

Oh my gosh, is that Oscar?

In a dress?

(ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING)

He's getting married? We've got to do something.

Yeah, tell me about it. He didn't even ask me to be his best man.

No, we've gotta...

I say, do any of you chaps know which way the blooming altar is?

I'm supposed to get married and all that rot, you know.

Um, excuse me, sir.

I think there's been a horrible mistake.

Mistake? I don't think so.

I'm definitely at the right wedding, eh?

So let's get started, shall we?

We are gathered here today

to join this here lady and this here bloke...

Hold the lorry. What's going on? Back up just a little moment.

Where's the duke? We can't have a wedding without a groom.

-Right? -Here, the duke's right here.

Just a case of cold fins. Carry on.

There you are, mate. All right then, here we go.

We are gathered here today to join this here lady...

Milo, what are you doing here?

Trying to say I'm sorry for getting you into this mess,

-and saving your tail fin. -OFFICIANT: Oi!

Are you two listening?

I'm just getting to the good part

where I say if there be any geezer amongst us

who thinks that this here bloke and this here royal bird

ought not to be married, let them speak now or...

-I have something to say! -(MURMURING)

I am afraid I cannot allow the queen to marry this fish!

Your Majesty, long have I dreamed of this day,

the day that I can finally ask for your hand in marriage.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, there. You can't marry the queen.

-She's betrothed to the duke. -Yeah!

If anyone's marrying my brother, it's gonna be me!

Although she could be yours if you're willing to fight for her.

I would be honored to meet the good duke on the field of battle

for the hand of this woman.

Righty-o then.

The two of you shall fight

in the oldest and most noble of Fish British traditions,

a slow jams rap battle.

(CHEERING)

How are you feeling out there, Fishminster Abbey?

Respect!

I would like to dedicate this jam

to a very special lady.

(SONG BEGINS)

(RAPPING) Crack open my shell, baby Serve me with fries

I'm a smooth rapping mussel Not like other guys

I know I'm not perfect I got barnacles too

But like the little bivalves I'm stuck on you

I don't mean to come off As selfish or rude

But you gotta give a chance To the shellfish dude

Don't need to buy you diamonds Nor cars, no way

'Cause I can't afford those On a teacher's pay

(CHORUS) Gonna treat you like the queen You were meant to be

Not the one of Fish England But the queen of me

(RAPPING) So come on, fishy lady Make it mussels and you

Meet me at the altar and say "I do"...

-(SONG ENDS) -(CHEERING)

Oh dear, that was dope.

Brilliant, Mr. Mussels, oh, brilliant.

But now it's time for your opponent's response.

Ladies and gents, I give to you the... duke.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

(BABBLING)

I'm a crazy guy!

-(BABBLES) -(CRICKETS CHIRPING)

The winner, Mr. Mussels!

-Oscar! -Milo!

I'm sorry, Oscar.

(SOBS) He dropped raps on me like bombs.

(SOBS) And now you gotta marry him.

He's a good man, Milo. I could do worse.

(BOTH SOBBING)

Your majesty, it is time.

-OSCAR: Oh... -Right then, where were we?

We are gathered here, blah, blah, blah, man,

blah, blah, blah, woman.

If anyone thinks these two ought not to get married...

-(DOOR OPENS) -QUEEN: Ahem!

(DRAMATIC MUSIC)

(GASPING)

-Oh! -Huh?

-Uh-oh. -QUEEN: You two,

outside now.

Who, me?

QUEEN: Yes, you.

-And that fake duke too. -I can explain!

QUEEN: Outside, now!

(WHIMPERING)

(DOORS SLAM)

-We're sorry, Your Majesty. -We were just having fun.

-I wasn't. (SOBS) -BEA: Chillax, you guys.

OSCAR: Bea, what are you doing with the queen?

Who, her? (YELLS)

(BOTH SCREAM)

Hey, look, it's just a wax sculpture I got from the museum.

-We knew that. -Did you also know

it's you we like hanging out with, not some royal fish?

Oh, I don't know, it was kinda fun hanging out with the queen.

-I feel like she and I are friends now. -Well, tell Her Majesty to butt out!

'Cause these three friends got a date in front of the TV.

Last one home heats up the fish flake puffs.

-You're on! -(LAUGHING)

There you are, darling. Where have you been?

Oh, Dukey,

That is the absolute last time

I spend the day imitating a sweaty high-school boy.

(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING)

-Hey, Snake. -Hey, Mouse.

Have you ever thought what would happen to us if we were sold separately?

Oh, nothing's going to separate us, Mouse.

Don't worry. I took care of everything.

"Insane mouse and snake has rabies.

"Do not buy. Snake sheds a lot.

"Mouse will steal your stuff also."

Wow, where did you learn how to write?

Same place you learned how to read.

(HORN HONKING)

MOUSE: Oh yeah. I was trying to block that out.