Original subtitles

[theme song playing]

♪ It's not easy being me ♪

♪ "Wash your face And brush your hair" ♪

♪ Nag, nag, nag It's just not fair ♪

♪ I'm Horrid Henry ♪

♪ So down with school I'm gonna rule ♪

♪ And when I'm king I'll do my thing ♪

♪ And then my life Would be so sweet ♪

♪ I'm Horrid Henry ♪

♪ Nah, nah, nah Nah, nah, ney ♪

♪ The Purple Hand Gang Rules, okay ♪

♪ It's so easy being me ♪

♪ I'm Horrid Henry ♪

[groans]

I need breakfast.

You need lunch, Henry. It's gone 10 o'clock.

But it's Saturday. I always lie in on Saturdays.

♪ Buttercups and daisies are flowers I love ♪

[groans]

Reckon we're gonna need this. It's a beautiful day today.

[groaning]

What are you doing to me?

Today is Family Fresh Air Day.

-No. -Which means...

No!

we'll be spending all day...

No, no, no!

outside, in the fresh air.

[inhales deeply]

[screaming] No!

-I'm not coming. -You are coming, Henry.

Now, who's gonna help me make the picnic?

Ooh, me, please.

I'll help you, Dad. Please, can I help?

Pleasity, please.

It's all right, worm. There's no competition.

You go right ahead, toady toad.

Don't be horrid, Henry.

Ooh, look. Lettuce and cucumber.

Ooh, and tomatoes.

Right. We need the picnic blanket.

Ooh, I'll get it for you, Dad.

And I'll pack the picnic.

[laughs mischievously]

Now, that's what I call a picnic.

Right, picnic blanket.

Check.

-Picnic bag. -Got it, Dad.

You're supposed to say "check".

"Check," worm.

Sun umbrella? Ah. I left that in the kitchen.

I'll get it, Dad.

Dad says, "Do you two want to take the Tiddlywinks in case we get bored later?"

I'm bored already. And no, I do not want to take the Tiddlywinks.

Ooh, is that a tomato?

What? Uh, oh, that.

Hmm, ooh, delicious.

[exclaims]

Go on, chew.

I am chewing, worm.

[Dad] Hurry up, boys.

Coming, Dad.

[exclaims in disgust]

What a wormy worm.

[Dad] Henry!

Coming, Dad.

Here, Henry, let me take something.

Wait, smelly nappy baby. You can carry something, too.

I am carrying something. I've got the Tiddlywinks.

[snorts] Tiddlywinks. Tiddly stinks, more like.

Don't be horrid, Henry.

What do you mean, "We're not going in the car"?

I didn't say that, Henry.

Well, then, are we going in the car?

-No. -[grunts]

Told you so.

It's Family Fresh Air Day today, Henry. Remember?

[sighs] How could I forget?

[sighs] At last we're here.

Yes. A perfect spot.

[sniffs] Hmm. Smell that fresh air.

[sniffs]

Uh, it's a bit smelly here, Dad.

[sniffing] Hmm, you're right, Peter. It is a bit smelly.

There's another perfect spot over there.

Hey, isn't anyone gonna help me with this lot?

Oh.

[sighs] I guess not.

You'd help me if you could, wouldn't you?

What do you mean, "No"? [snorts] Thanks a lot.

Dad says, "Hurry up, Henry. We found another perfect spot."

[sighs] This stuff's heavy, you know.

Who are you talking to, Henry?

No one you need to know about, smelly nappy baby, duke of poop.

Dad!

You don't have to tell on me, you know.

Yes, I do.

Dad!

-Dad... -What is it, Henry?

We're still looking for the perfect spot to sit.

Yeah, I know that. But...

[Peter] Over here, Dad.

[Dad] Over here, Henry.

[Peter] Here.

No. Over here.

[Dad] Over here.

No, here.

Don't be horrid, Henry.

-[roars] -[screams]

[crunching]

Hmm?

Hey, what do you think you're doing?

-He's nibbling. -Yeah, I can see that.

He's a nasty nibbler.

[Henry] Yeah, I can see that, too.

Get lost, nasty nibbler.

He won't go away till he's nibbled all your food.

Hmm, great.

[farts]

[sniffing] Yuck. You just farted.

There's a perfect spot over here, Dad.

[farts]

[groans] Someone's made a nasty smell.

Was it you, Henry?

No, it was her.

Oh, hello, I'm Peter.

Oh, here we go.

-And you are? -Finola.

[snorts] Farty Finola, more like.

Henry, you are so not a gentleman.

You're right, Peter. I am so not a gentleman.

So why don't you take Farty Finola

and the Nasty Nibbler away from here?

Far, far away.

Would you like a pretzel, Finola?

Ooh, wait there. Don't go anywhere, fair lady.

[both laugh]

Oh, please. What is this?

Love me, love my farty pretzel?

[burps]

[panting]

He wants you to tickle his tummy.

No way. He ate all our food.

That's because he's a nibbler.

Yeah, you already told me. A real nasty nibbler.

[barking]

[Peter chuckling] Good boy.

Would you like to play Tiddlywinks?

[sighs] Such fun.

Ah, here you all are.

Where did you get that?

Oh, they were giving away free ice creams on the other side of the park.

-Did you say, "were"? -Oh, yes.

Ha. I got the last one, lucky, eh?

Yeah, really lucky. For you.

[slurps] Oh, uh, sorry, Henry. Do you want a bit?

No, thanks.

-[slurps] -Dad?

Yes, Henry.

Dad! Come and meet my new friends.

Back in a minute, Henry.

Hang on a minute.

Excuse me.

What is it, Henry? Can't you see I'm busy?

-Where's Mum? -Mum?

Oh, she's at the hairdresser's.

The hairdresser's?

So, a haircut was more important

than enjoying Family Fresh Air Day with us?

Well, yes.

You see, here's my theory.

If Mum had been there when I got up this morning,

I wouldn't have had to go without my breakfast.

And if Mum had come to the park with us,

I wouldn't have had to carry everything.

Hmm. Time to go home now, I reckon.

-Hi, Mum, nice hair. -Oh, thank you.

Did you enjoy Family Fresh Air Day, Henry?

Sort of, but next time, can you come, too?

It's just not the same without you.

You know, sometimes, just sometimes,

that boy says the nicest things.

[sighs] Good bye.

[indistinct chatter]

[wailing]

Excuse me, girls coming through.

Yeah, coming through.

Hey, you're queue barging.

No, we're not.

Yes, you are.

-I'm not. -[blowing raspberry] Are so.

[grunts] Am not, am not, am not.

-Hey, wasn't even a word. -Yes, it is!

-Isn't. -Is, is, is!

Oh, what? Can't you see I'm busy?

Well, yes, and I hate to interrupt you, Henry, but...

some of us are hungry and we want our lunch.

Yeah, want our lunch.

Well, thanks for your support, Susan.

Yeah, thanks. You are?

So, where were we?

-Isn't, isn't, isn't! -Is, Henry!

"Is" is a word. Anyway, you don't even know anything...

[both yelling]

...I can't stand you, Margaret.

[both screaming] No!

Hey, where's my lunch?

[muffled] What? That's it. I'm telling my Dad,

and he'll make sure, you're out of that kitchen

quicker than a kitten on a hot tin roof!

What did you just say, Margaret?

-I said, uh... -[cat meows]

[swallows]

Oh. Miss Oddbod. I didn't see you there.

I was just saying that my Dad...

No, not that bit. The bit about the kitten.

-Oh. The bit about the kitten... -[meows]

on a hot tin roof, you mean, Miss Oddbod?

Yes, Margaret. The bit about a kitten on a hot tin roof.

[meows]

-Erm, ah... -Exactly, Margaret.

"Erm, ah..." just about sums it up.

[whispering] Sorry, Miss Oddbod.

I can't hear you, Margaret.

[softly] Sorry, Miss Oddbod

I still can't hear you.

Sorry, Miss Oddbod.

That's better.

You, young people, "sorry" seems to be the hardest word.

-Erm, Miss Oddbod? -What is it, Margaret?

Can I go now, Miss Oddbod?

-Go where, Margaret? -Erm, to play?

No, Margaret. That is not the right answer.

-Is it, little tiddly widdly? -[meows]

-Detention? -Is the right answer, Margaret,

and do not pass go.

No, Miss Oddbod.

I mean, yes, Miss Oddbod. I mean...

[Miss Oddbod] Oh, just go, Margaret.

Phew. Lucky escape.

Nothing lucky about it, beetle brain.

Just be thankful I didn't turn you in.

It was all your fault in the first place.

Get lost, bogey bones.

Later, loser.

What is she getting so beetle bounty about?

Well, she's got detention from Miss Oddbod,

and she says, it's all my fault.

-Well, was it? -Of course not.

She was being rude about kittens and hot tin roofs.

I didn't really understand that bit.

Hmm, me neither.

If you want some real rudeness, then I'm your man.

Yeah, you're the man.

Let me tell you just how rude I am.

Woo hey!

Yo, what's up? Your old mate Ralph here.

They call me Rude Ralph, because I was born to be rude!

[blows raspberry]

-♪ Rude Ralph ♪ -[buzzing]

♪ Ruder than a bee That's buzzing ♪

♪ Rude Ralph ♪

♪ Ruder than your Auntie's cousin ♪

♪ Rude Ralph ♪

♪ Ruder than a mountain goat ♪

♪ Rude Ralph ♪

♪ Ruder than a Henry Thank you note ♪

♪ So I'm walking Down the street ♪

♪ No guesses who I meet ♪

♪My old mate, Henry ♪

♪ He's with his mum and dad ♪

♪So I do no more I start to snore ♪

♪'Cause that's how I am I'm rude ♪

-♪ He's rude ♪ -♪ I am rude ♪

♪ He's really really rude ♪

♪ Rude Ralph ♪

♪ Ruder than a bee That's buzzing ♪

♪ Rude Ralph ♪

♪ Ruder than your Auntie's cousin ♪

♪ Rude Ralph ♪

♪ Ruder than a mountain goat ♪

♪ Rude Ralph ♪

♪ Ruder than a Henry Thank you note ♪

[blowing raspberry]

♪ So I'm sitting at my desk Spying on the rest ♪

♪ When suddenly I look up and... ♪

Oh, sorry, Miss Battle-Axe I didn't see you there.

[all grunting]

Ralph, you know you're not allowed

to sing and dance in the corridor.

Yes, Miss Battle-Axe.

So, it's detention for all of you.

Follow me, now.

This is all your fault, Henry.

[girls giggling]

What? My fault? No way.

I mean, is it my fault when everyone's yelling at me?

-Stop that, Henry! -Don't be horrid, Henry!

You're the worst parents in the world!

[Henry] I'm the creature from the Black Lagoon,

[bubbling]

seething and writhing in my swampy underwater lair,

just waiting for a victim to pass by,

and that victim's going to be you, smelly nappy baby.

[screams]

[Henry roars]

[Dad] Leave your brother alone, Henry.

[Margaret] So you see, so then I said to her and she said to me,

we both said to each other, "If you really really want to come to my house,

you gotta have to do something about that dog of yours,

because she's really stinky, and I can't stand her,

and actually I don't like you very much either." So...

[Henry] And as for Moody Margaret, who I see as a girl,

enough said really...

[Margaret speaking on phone]

If she doesn't let me play with her Crimson Cutlass,

then I'll make her walk the plank.

And what makes you think, I'll let you play with my Crimson Cutlass, Henry?

[Henry] Because I am a giant octopus,

lurking just below the surface of the water,

waiting for exactly the right time

for someone to fall off the plank.

And that someone's gonna be you, Moody Margaret.

Ha. Like I care.

[screams]

[thunder claps]

[Henry] And when you fall into my clutches,

I'll wrap my tentacles around you

and squeeze and squeeze and squeeze.

[roars]

[screams]

Help!

[screaming]

[Margaret] I'll get you, Henry!

So I get a little angry sometimes.

And is it my fault when no one knows the answer to anything?

[music playing]

♪ What's one plus one Times two plus two ♪

♪ Where do spacemen Go to the loo ♪

-♪ Why's the sea blue? ♪ -♪ Where's my other shoe? ♪

♪ Where do All the bubbles go to? ♪

♪ Hmm ♪

♪ Do anteaters Really only eat ants? ♪

♪ Why does Superman Show off his pants? ♪

-♪ Can animals dance? ♪ -♪ What's the capital of France? ♪

♪ Bert, is this yours by any chance? ♪

-[all giggling] -Uh, I don't know.

[all] ♪ Oh, we don't know We just don't know ♪

♪ Ask us a question We just don't know ♪

♪ We don't know We just don't know ♪

♪ Whatever we know We just don't know ♪

[school bell ringing]

Well, you get the general idea.

How is that my fault?

-How did that happen? -I don't know.

Not my fault.

[children clamoring]

Not my fault.

Oops. But not really my fault.

[panting]

[continues panting]

-[child laughs maliciously] -No, Vicky.

[grunts]

[laughs maliciously]

Definitely not my fault.

Hey, where is everyone?

[chuckles] Oh, yeah, everyone's in detention.

[panting]

Well, nearly everyone.

[grunts]

Henry, what do you have to say for yourself?

It was all my fault, Miss.

[sighs] Not again, Henry. Detention, now.

Yes! [laughs mischievously]

[theme music playing]