Original subtitles

- φίλε - ευχαριστώ αγάπη μου.

γιατι είναι πολύ ιδιαίτερα,γεμισμένα με..

λαχανάκια βρυξελλών

έχουμε πάρει τα σανίδια και το χόρτο.εσείς πήρατεWe get the surf and turf. You guys get-

-θα πάρουμε ολόκληρο βλαστάρι στις βρυξέλλες... -ωραία.

τελεία

πάντα μπορώ..

βάλτο εκεί πίσω αν είναι λίγο

Όταν ο Κονραντ και εγώ πρωτοπαντρευτήκαμε ,έκανε ολες αυτές τις υποσχέσεις.

"δεν θα ξαναπάω ποτέ σε μεγάλα βουνά"

Ήξερα πως δεν θα σταματήσει ποτέ την αναρρίχηση..

αλλα δεν πέρασε πολύς καιρός που σκεφτόταν μια μεγάλη αποστολή.

και απλά έκανα νέυμα λέγοντας ,εντάξει...

η αναρρίχηση σε μεγάλο υψόμετρο στα Ιμαλαία είναι πολύ επικύνδινη.

είνια το πιο επικύνδυνο επαγγελματίκο σπόρ.

αλλα νομίζω για το Μερού ,το ρίσκο αξίζει τον κόπο.

Όντας αλπινιστής,το Μερού είναι το επιστεύγασμα όλων όσων έχω κάνει..

και πάντα ήθελα να κάνω αυτη την κορυφή.

Ηξερα πως θα συνέχιζε να σκαρφαλώνει για πάντα...

όμως ξέρεις, δεν ήμουν σίγουρη.

Ξέρω ότι μπορούν να συμβούν διάφορα

Ξέρεις και αυτό είναι που λέω πάντα.

ναι ,ναι

αλλα κάποια πράγματα μπορούν να συμβούν.

έχω πάθει ναυτία εδώ και καμία ώρα..

- τι κάνεις Τζίμη? -.....

στείλαμε κατι πράγματα στην κορυφή του φόρτηγού....

και τώρα μαζεύουμε τα κομμάτια ...

Το Μερού έχει φήμη ως αδύνατη ανάβαση.

Και επίσης ήξερα, ακριβώς με τον τρόπο που ο Κόνραντ ανέλαβε το ταξίδι ...

ήταν πολύ αδιάφορος και...

Νομίζω ότι οσο πιο ανέμελος είναι ο Κόνραντ, είναι ...

γιανα πρότείνει ένα ταξίδι ,και πιο πολύ ανύσηχος θα ειναι ...

ο,ναι.

έμεινα άφωνος οταν ο Τζίμη και ο Κονραντ μου έιπαν για το Μερού.

Δεν το είχαν οργανώσει πολύ καλά

Δεν είπαν,αυτό είναι το βουνό που όλοι προσπάθησαν και όλοι απέτυχαν

Στο μυαλό τους, μάλλον ημουν ωω,έχουμε έναν νέο, φρέσκο αίμα!!

θα είναι καλός στο..

να πάει καμια σχοινία μπροστά σε κάποιες σχοινίες...

-κοιτα την ανακάλυψη..Ναι.

ποιός

φίλε . το πτερύγιο του καρχαρία στο κεντρίκο Μερού.

η ανάβαση αυτή εχει της περισσοτερες αποτυχίες απο οποιαδήποτε διαδρομή στα Ιμαλάια

[Chuckles]

Είναι οι πηγές του ποταμού Γάγγη ...

ένα από τα πιο ιερά ποτάμια της Γης.

Το κέντρο του σύμπαντος. Είναι αυτός ο παράξενος δεσμός ...

αυτό το σημέιο όπου ο ουρανός, η Γη και η κόλαση όλα έρχονται μαζί.

Το πράγμα που της δίνει το όνομά του Το πτερύγιο του καρχαρία είναι αυτή η λεπίδα 1.500 πόδια ...

από αυτόν τον όμορφο,τον άψογο γρανίτη ...

για πάνω, ξέρεις, 20.000 πόδια.

Αυτό είναι το κριτήριο για τον καλύτερο αναρριχητή.

Ξέρεις,το έχουν προσπαθήσει πολύ ικανοί αναρριχητές, δεν ξερώ καμια εικοσαριά φορές.

Καποιοι απο τους καλύτερους αναρριχητες του κόσμου εχουν προσπαθήσει κ απέτυχαν σε αυτη την διαδρόμή.

το Μερού δεν είναι απλά δύσκολο.

Είναι δύσκολο με ενα πραγματικά πολύπλοκο τρόπο.

Δεν μπορείς να εισαι απλά καλος αναρριχητης πάγου.

Δεν μπορείς απλά να είσαι καλός στο υψόμετρο. Δεν μπορείς απλώς να είναι ένας καλός αναρριχητηςε βράχου.

Πρέπει να μπορείς να σκαρφαλώνεις πάγο και μεικτά.

θα πρέπει να μπορείς να σκαρφαώνεις μεγαλους τοίχους στα 20.000ποδια.

Είναι όλα αυτά τα πράγματα τυλιγμένα σε ένα πακέτο ...

για αυτό υποχώρησαν τοσο πολλοι και καλοί αναρριχητες...

και πιθανόν να νικήσει και εσας, ίσως θα νικάει όλους για πάντα.

Δηλαδή σε ενα ειδως νοοτροπίας...

είναι μια ακαταμάχητη έλξη.

οταν φτάσαμε εκεί και κοίταξα απάνω στο βουνό..

Δεν ήξερα ... οτι..

που πηγαίναμε να κάνουμε,γιατι δεν είχα δει κάτι τοσο σύνθετο

η αποιρία του Ριναν, δεν με σταμάτησαν ποτε.

Ήξερα ότι ήταν αρκετά δυνατός. Ήξερε τα συστήματα.

Και σαν ομάδα ,το σύνολο της εμπειριας μετράει.

εχω πάει με αρκετές αποστολές με τον Κονραντ.

Αλλά δεν είχα κάνει καμία σοβαρή ανάβαση μαζί του.

Και δεν είχα κάνει ποτέ ουτε μια ανάβαση με τον Τζίμη.

ειμαί τόσο ανένδοτος μονο όταν πρόκειτε για αποστολές

με τα άτομα που γνωρίζω και εμπιστέυομαι.

και υπάρχει μονο μια εξαίρεση σε αυτόν τον κανόνα..

αυτή ειναι μόνο αν πραγματικά εμπιστέυομαι και γνωρίζω κάποιον καλά,οπως τον Κονραντ...

"αξίζει να δένεσαι με αυτόν τον τύπο"

Είχα ακούσει για τον Ρενάν και τον ειχα δεί σε μια ταίνια αναρριχητηκή...

που ήταν..σκαρφάλωνε σόλο στα Νορθ Σιξ Σοουτερ(γιούτα).

και έτσι είπα " εντάξει πάμε να συνατήσουμε τον Ρενάν"

Είδα το φίλμ του Ρενάν να σκαρφαλώνει σόλο στα λιτνινγ μπολτ κρακς(γιούτα)

τον βλέπεις να κανει αυτά τα πράγματα και ειναι εκεί έξω..

μοιάζει με κάτι να εχεί πάρει φωτία .

έίχα ακούσει για αυτό το παιδί πως είναι ταλέντο

και πως ζούσε στην γύρα ..

οπως σχεδόν ολοι οι αναρριχητες...

ειδικά αυτοι που φτάνουν στο προσκύνιο.

το μόνο που δεν είχε αμάξι.

κυριολεκτικά ήταν σαν να έπεσε στην έρημο.

οταν πρωτογνώρισα τον Ρενάν , σχεδίαζε σκίτσα.

μικρού μεγέθους.

και μετά άρχισε να πέρνει μεγάλους καμβάδες στις αποστολές.

γιατί απο εδω και στο εξής θα πήγαινε σε περισσότερες αποστολές.

είχε εκτιμήσει την ευκαιρία και δεν σταματούσε με τίποτα.

5:30 το απόγευμα ,πρεπει να ξεκινήσουμε την διαδρομή

είναι εύθραυστος και κάνει κρύο

περιμένουμε τον ήλιο να φύγει

έτσι θα παγώσει.

αυτή είναι η καλήτερη στιγμή

αυτή ειναι η στιγμή που όλα πέφτουν και τοτε πραγματικά ξεκινάς.

φυσικά,είχα πεί όταν φεύγαμε απο το Γανγκότι και όταν φύγαμε απο το Μπόζεμαν.

ομώς τώρα θα κατασκηνώσουμε στο βουνό σήμερα

ο Κονραντ προσπάθησε το βουνό για πρώτη φορά το 2003...

και απέτυχε.

ήταν πολύ τεχνική αναρρίχηση.αυτό δεν είναι το Έβερεστ.

είναι ένα εντελός διαφορετικό στύλ αναρρίχησης.

γιατί στο Έβερεστ μπορείς να πάρεις Σέρπα και να σου κουβαλάνε όλα σου τα πράγματα,

να σου βάζουν σταθερά σχοινιά και να αναλαμβάνουν το μεγαλύτερο ρίσκο.

ο Τζίμι και ο Κονραντ έχουν κάνει το Έβερεστ τέσσερις ή πέντε φορές

ο Τζίμη εχει κατέβει και με σκί απο την κορυφή.

όμως το Μερού είναι το άντι-Εβερεστ

κανείς δεν θα μεταφέρει τα πράγματά σου

αν χρειαστείς κάτι θα πρέπει να το κουβαλάς στην πλάτη σου

και για το Μερού χρειάζεσε πολλά υλικά για την ανάβασηAnd for Meru, you need a lot of tools to do the job.

γιατί συμπεριλαμβάνει όλο το φάσμα της αναρρίχησης τα τελευταία 1500πόδια του Πτερύγιου του καρχαρία είναι λεία.

ειναι καθαρά , χωρίς χαρακτηριστικά κομμάτια.

όμως κάτω απο αυτό είναι 4000πόδια απο χαοτικό σκαρφάλωμα ,χιόνι σε λούκια

επικινδυνο και εκτεθείμενο

έτσι τα παιδία θα κάνουν αυτά τα 4000πόδια ελαφριά και γρήγορα..

σκεφτόμενοι πως είναι πραγματίκα ταχύτατοιthinkin' they're really studs.

και μετά φτάνουν στο πτερύγιο κ εκεί είναι μεγάλος τοίχος

και θα χρεισιμοποιήσουν τεχνικές μεγάλων τοίχων στο πάνω τμήμα του Μερού.

και θα πηγαίνουν αργά με αυτην την τεχνική της αναρρίχησης.

ίσως θα μπορέις να κάνεις μόνο 200 πόδια την μέρα.

ίσως πάρει έξι ή επτά μέρες για να σκαρφαλώσεις τα τελευταία 1500πόδια

και αν πάρει τόσο πολύ και αν πηγαίνεις αργά θα σου χρειαστεί και αίωρα θα χρειαστείς φαγητό , νερό και καύσιμα

ετσί απλά ,αυτο είναι 90κιλά

θα χρειαστείς υλικά για τεχνιτή αναρριχηση,23κιλά απο μέταλα.

έτσι θα κουβαλάς αυτά τα 100 κιλά άχρηστου βάρους για τα πρώτα 4000 πόδια

και κιανεις απο τους προηγούμενους αναρριχητές

και ο Κονραντ την πρώτη φόρα πίστευε κατι τέτοιο.

δεν θα μπορέσουν να σκαρφαλώσουν με αυτό τον τρόπο

πολύ βάρος.νιώσε το υψόμετρο λίγο

όμως ο Κονραντ μετά την πρώτη φόρα έιπε...[Krakauer] But Conrad after that first time said, "Huh."

έτσι θα γίνει ,το βλέπω ειναι ....θεικό

θα πρέπει να σκαρφαλώσεις με τεχνιτη αναρριχηση και να ανεβαζεις τα πράγματα σου

-Τζίμη , πως πάει?- [Jimmy] Man, how's it going? -πάει..

νύχτα, ουπς..αναρρίχηση. ευτυχως οι παγόβιδες ειναι κάλες

τωρά ,γιατι το κάνουμε αυτό?

η θέα , η θέα

νομίζω είναι 2 τα ξημερώματα.πήγαμε για διανυχτέρευση.

στον ώμο αντι να στήσουμε την αιώρα.

είνια πολυ πιο εύκολο .εχουμε καποιους κορεάτες..

πες μας γιατι? τον πραγματικό λογο γιατι δεν στήσαμε τίποτα

γιατι ίσως δουλέψαμε λιγότερο

μπορούσε να ήταν χειρότερα.ο ουρανός μπορούσε να κατεβάζει αυτή τη στιγμή.

κοίτα τι γίνετε εκέι πέρα.

εδώ είναι ο Κονραντ που ξαπλώνει στο χιόνι

και εδώ ειναι το απέσιο σήμειο διανυχτερευσεις μου

ξέρεις ειναι άσχημο οταν είσαι..

-όταν κοίμασε απευθίας στο χίονι -ναι..

και όταν χιονίζει έξω λίγο.

παέι μέχρι ....δύο...

σήμερα κάναμε μερικά λαθάκια

πηγαινέ με σχολείο...

πάλι

όμως κάναμε αρκετή πρόοδο...

τραβόντας 90κιλά φορτία.

πάνω σε 3000πόδια χιόνινο λούκι

σε υψόμετρο 16.000 ποδιών

κοίτα αυτο το σύστημα θα είναι εδώ πολύ σύντομα.

ο Κονραντ και εγώ έχουμε πάει κάποιες δύσκολες αποστολές παρέα...

σε όλο τον κόσμο.

είμασταν στο Κ7 σΤΟ Πακιστάν

κάναμε με σκι το Ντενάλι και έχουμε πάει κ στο Εβερεστ παρέα

η φήμη του Κονραντ μεταξύ των αναρριχητών είναί άψόγη

η είρωνία ειναι πως έγινε παγκοσμίος γνωστός οταν βρήκε το σώμα του Μάλορι..

σε μία ανάβασή του στο Εβερεστ...

περα απο τις πολύ δύσκολες πρώτες αναβάσεις σε όλο τον κόσμο.

οι περισσότεροι της γενίας μου μεγάλωσαν μελετόντας τις αποστολές του.

τοτε ποτε δεν θα φανταζόμουν πως θα σκαρφάλωνα μαζί του

έτσι ειναί δυσκολο να πιστέψεις πως είμαστε σχοινοσύντροφοι για επτά χρόνια.

-χιονίζει λίγο..

[Conrad] Ναί...

- όμως θα προσπαθήσουμε να ανέβουμε. - Ναί.

θα χιονίζει για λίγο και μετα θα είναι ωραία.

Σωστά?

εντομεταξύ κοιτάμε έξω ένα μπαλάκι πινκ πονκ

[Jimmy's Voice] η καταίγίδα ήρθε..

και παλέψαμε για να στήσουμε την εναέρια κατασκήνωσή μας.

οοο,καλή δουλειά

οπου είναι βασικά μια κούνιαι με μια τέντα γύρο του.

- θεέ μου - ολα καλά.

και μετά αρχίσαμε να ακούμε χιονοστοιβάδες απο την πλευρά μας...

να περνάνε δίπλα μας

[Jimmy] κοίτα χιονίζει έξω.

[Conrad] ζώντας σε μια αιώρα και χιονίζει..

-μοιάζει κάπως με χριστούγεννα.

αυτό δεν θέλαμε για Χριστουγεννα- χιονοθύελλα και....

-να καθόμαστε στο.. - πτερύγιο του καρχαρία?

- Ναί[Conrad] Yeah. - βρεγμλενοι ως το κόκαλο.Τέλεια.

και έτσι είμαστε εκεί για την μέρα..και μετα για δύο μέρες

και μετά για τρείς μέρες.

και βασίκα μείναμε κολλημένοι στην αιωρα για τέσσερις μέρες.

ήταν μια απο της μεγαλύτερεσ καταιγίδες που έχω δεί

ήτασν τέσσερις μέρες μεσα στη καταίγίδα...

και είχαμε φαγητό για μόνο επτά μέρες.

έτσι,καταλήξαμε , ξέρεις , So, we ended up, you know, να χαλάσουν πολλά τρόφιμα.

χάσαμε τα μίσα απο τα φαγητά μας.

και το 90% του βουνού ήταν απο πάνω μας

είναι το Σαμσαρα-η διανυχτέρευση της ταλαιπορίας

[Renan's Voice] σκέφτηκα"εντάξη ,τελειωσε"

είχαμε ένα καλό αγώνα εκει πάνω.

κρύο.που έιναι ο ήλιος που είχαμε τις προηγούμενες μέρες.

είμαστε εδώ πάνω και παγώνουμε.

αυτό είναι αρκετό για εμένα.

είμαι χαρούμενος που εζησα αυτή την εμπειρία..

αλλα πιο πολυ πολύ που αυριο κατεβαίνουμε.

η καταιγίδα ευτυχως τελείωσε..

και ξέρεις ,στο κεφάλι μου ,λέω ..."εντάξη..."

ήρθε η ώρα να ξεκινήσουμε.η καταιγίδα τελειώσε.

ετσί όταν ξεκινήσαμε να φορτωνόμαστε ύλικα εκεινη την μερα και έιμασταν έτοιμοι να σκαρφαλώσουμε..

ξερείς,υπήρξε μία παρεξήγηση.Νομίζω για τον Ρενάν,νόμιζε πως...

οο,ξέρεις,νόμιζε πως θα πάμε κάτω!

-εντάξει

απλά φορτώθηκαν με εξόπλισμο κ συνέχισαν να σκαρφαλώνουν προς τα απάνω.

δεν ήξερα γιατι ή πώς - τι σκεφτόντουσαν..

και είδικα ο ΚονραντAnd especially Conrad.

δεν τον είχα δεί ποτε τοσο...πορωμένο για μια διαδρομή.

η αναρριχηση ειναι πραγματικά επικύνδυνο σπόρ

και ένας καλός σχοινοσύντροφος θα σε βοηθήσει για την κορυφή..

και την ίδια στιγμή θα σε προστατεύσει απο τους κινδύνους που μπορείς να μπλέξεις.

[Renan] ασφαλίζοντας απο μία αιώρα...

πρέπει να εμπιστεύεσε τον σχοινοσύντροφό σου 100%

νομίζω πως ο Ρενάν έπαθε σόκ..

γαιτι δεν είχε δεί πραγματικά κατί τόσο μεγάλο.

και εγώ και ο Τζίμη είχαμε περάσει τέτοια.

το πιέζαμε και καταλαβαίναμε πως δεν ηταν κ τόσο άσχήμα

και εκει παίζει ρόλο ο μέντορας σου

η αναρριχηση ειναι περπιεργη τέχνη,περνάει απο γενία σε γενία.

ο τρόπος να το μαθαίνεις ειναι να έχεις ενα μέντορα.

ο Κονραντ το έμαθε με δάσκαλο τον Μαγκς Σταμπ.

ο Κονραντ ήταν φαινόμενο και ο Μαγκς ήταν ένας απο τους καλύτερους αναρριχητές του κόσμου.

Ο Μαγκς ήταν πολύ καλός.με πήρε υπο την προστασία του.

ήταν ο παλιός κ εγώ ο νέος.

με πίεσε.

πήρε κατί που δεν έιχε σχήμα και του έδωσε μόρφή.

ακόμα και σήμερα έιναι ένα πολυ σημαντικό κομμάτι της ζωής μου.

έτσι ο Κονραντ βρήκε τον τέλειο μέντορα.

και ο Μακγς τον πήρε στο βανάκι του και ύψωσε την σήμαία ..

και αυτό είναι ο στόχος του ,η κορυφή του Μερού.

και ο Κονραντ ήταν έκθαμβος..

και ο Μαγκς το προσπάθησε δύο φόρες.Νομίζω το ογδόντα έξι και το ογδόντα οκτώ.

υποχώρησε και τις δύο φορές για διάφορους λόγους.

ομως για τον Μαγκς αυτό δεν τον αποθάρρινε,ήταν ένας πολυ καλός αναρριχητής.

και αυτό ήταν ένα τμήμα ενός καλοσχεδιαμένου πλάνου και θα ξαναπήγαινε.

και είμαι σύγουρος πως του Κονραντ του έκανε πολύ μεγάλη εντύπωση.

και έτσι το 1992 δύο χρόνια μετα που γνώρισα τον Κονραντ

ο Μαγκς πέθανε στο Ντενάλι οδηγόντας έναν πελάτη

δούλευα στο Σαλτ λάκε και πήγαινα για σκαρφάλωμα.

και οχ,οδηγηήσαμε πίσω..

και ο φίλος μου Ντουγκ είπε ,"νόμίζουμε πως ο Μαγκς πέθανε"

θυμάμε ακριβώς το σημείο που ο Νταγκ μου το είπε.

είπα " οχι γαμώτο"

γιατί πιστευα πως τετοια πράγματα δεν γίνοντε.

και πως δεν θα γινόταν στο Μαγκς . Ηταν ο καλύτερος.

το να σκαρφαλώνεις με τον μέντορα σου ειναι πολλες φορές επικινδυνο.

γιατι τους εχεις εμπιστευτεί οσο τιποτα άλλο.

τους έδωσα τα πάντα και....

ηταν μια συνεχεις μάχη στο μυαλό μου κάθε μέρα.

πάγωνα,έιχα ανεξέλεγκτο ρίγος..

αλλά δεν ήθελα να είμαι το παιδί που θα πεί....

"οο.κρυώνω. θέλω να πάω κάτω"

[Renan] τα χανεις ε?

πρέπει να έιχε μειον είκοσι όταν ο ήλιος πήγε πισω απο την γωνία.

είναι εξουθενοτικο να σκαρφαλώνεις σε τετοιες θερμοκρασίες

όλα γινονται για το σκαρφάλωμα σε σχισμές.

και δεν βλέπω καμια εδώ

θα σκαρφαλώναμε αυτες τις εντελός τυφλές πλάκες .

και ήμουν συγουρος πως δεν υπήρχε αλλο μέρος για να πάς.

όμως μετα με τον Τζίμη ή τον Κονραντ θα πηγαίναμε στα όρια.

Ξερεις, αυτο ειναι απότομο,μοντέρνο Α4τεχνιτό.

χρησιμοποιει εργαλεία σαν τεχνίτης...

tapping and pounding and tweaking.

και ειναι σαν επιπλοποιος

σμίλεψη σε αυτό το μέρος σε ενα καρύδι ή κάτι

εκτος και αν χτυπισείς το πιολέ σου μια ακόμη φορά και θα γίνει επιπλοποιός

ίσως να το χωρίσει και να καταστραφή αυτό..maybe you split it and you ruin this cabinet- bummer.

αν σε μία Α4 σχοίνια,σπάσει ....,πεθαίνεις.If on an A4 pitch, you, like, split the cabinet, you die.

Ναι θα κατασκηνώσω εδώ.Yeah, I'll tent right there.

οο,θες να είσαι εδώ?που θές να είσαι?

δεν με νοίαζει.είμαι ακριβώς στην κόψη.θα κάτσω λίγο εδώ.

έχω κάποια ζεστά bevies.

είνια δύσκολο να εκτιμήσης σε τι κατάσταση βρισκόμαστε It's hard to overstate what kind of condition we were in.

μόλις.. [Sighs]

είμαστε κυριολεκτικά αναγκασμένοι να τρώμε λίγες κουταλίες απο γρανόλα κάθε πρώι...

και να μοιραζόμαστε λίγες φέτες απο σαλάμι κατα την διάρκει της ημέρας...

με λίγο τυρί.

θέλω να πώ,έχουμε σίγουρα πολύ περιορισμένες μερίδες σε αύτο το σημέιο.I mean, we're definitely on pretty limited rations at this point.

- ψημένο

για αναρριχητές ..πάνω απο ένα γκαζάκι μισοάδειο προπανίου...

there's nothing finer than roasting the rind.

It becomes quite tasty.

[Jimmy] 'Cause basically eating everything that you have left.

Super efficient.

Next week, we'll be eating our boots. [Chuckles]

[Metal Clinking]

[Krakauer] You know, Conrad talks a lot about how to keep the risk manageable.

Talks about there's acceptable risk and unacceptable risk.

But he always keeps it on the acceptable side by leaving this margin.

Om, shanti.

[Krakauer Continues] But... you know, he had tried this climb before...

failed, and even if he didn't admit it to himself...

to succeed, he was gonna have to throw that conservative stuff out the window...

and take mega-risk on this.

But, you know, if they want to stay alive...

they cannot fuck up at all.

And he talked about, "If I die, I've really let down my family.

I cannot make any mistakes."

That's not good to be thinkin' when you're that far out there.

He is thinkin', "Man, I cannot die now...

because then I've blown it for my wife and kids."

Jenni has no idea.

She has no fucking idea what he is really doin' out there.

[Sighs]

[Jimmy Sighs]

Fuck.

We're all just kind of frayed.

Sixteen days up here, just givin' it everything we have.

It's been really slow.

And, uh, we're running out of fuel actually.

Um, and food. And cigarettes and papers.

But tomorrow is kind of the decider.

If we, uh...

don't get up and around this big, steep headwall...

we're gonna have to pull the cord, but, uh...

we got one last push tomorrow.

Jimmy's strength is that he's very rational and accepting...

and real in what we can do.

When we first met, I realized right away...

there was a mentorship that was going to blossom.

I also immediately sensed that he was driven and determined.

- And I never really knew why. - [Shutter Clicking]

My parents called me Xiao-pang.

It means "Little Chub."

[Jimmy's Voice] My parents had to escape from China during the Communist Revolution.

They both went through a lot.

They came to the United States to make a new life.

And I think they had really high expectations for me.

My dad was a hard-ass.

In the wintertime, we would get cords of wood to heat the house.

And he'd put it in the back of this huge yard we had...

and make me drag it back on a sled in thigh-deep snow.

He was really about being tough.

Mountain climbing, it wasn't a career to them.

My mom used to call me all the time...

and lament about the fact her son was this homeless man...

who wandered around and camped and didn't have a home.

But when I went through a difficult divorce...

and called Jimmy, crying, upset...

his first words were, "Come stay with me."

So, we just moved into his bachelor pad.

Two kids, all their markers and Legos. [Chuckles]

Yeah.

And he just took us right in.

[Krakauer] You know, he's another one of these extremely accomplished climbers.

You don't appreciate how good a climber he is...

because you get distracted by the art...

which is probably the way he likes it.

And taking pictures makes the climbing Way harder.

He was filming this Everest expedition, and his morn got really sick.

And he found out about it and had to leave so he could see her before she died.

[Jimmy] My mom had made me promise fairly early on, she was like...

"If you're gonna make this your life, you need to promise me one thing.

You have to promise me that you will not die before me."

And when I was on climbs and on expeditions...

I would get to a certain point, and I would say, "Okay.

How close am I willing to go to potentially break that promise?"

So, after my mom died...

when the climbing started to get into that place...

I remember a moment being like, "Well, I can go for it right now."

[Equipment Jingling]

[Renan] Conrad's up there. Can't find good gear.

Our hands and feet are all frost-numb.

Nice, Rad.

Good move.

We're probably at about 20,500 feet.

Just short of the ridge.

It's fucking Arctic.

Today's our summit bid.

[Renan] Bring it in.

- [Conrad] Whoo! - [Renan] Yeah, Rad!

ωραία

[Krakauer] The game in climbing is cut that line as fine as you can.

But you don't want to take stupid risk.

If you die taking a stupid risk, not only are you dead...

but you've embarrassed yourself and you've disgraced yourself.

You're not supposed to take risk lightly.

You're supposed to show that you're so good and so controlled...

you can take it right to that line and go no further.

[Jimmy] It's been a super long morning. Started at 2:00.

Probably another 500 feet to the summit.

We're gunning for the summit ridgeline...

and Conrad's burrowing through this overhanging cornice.

Renan is in the line of fire.

Snow and ice falling 150 feet...

just slamming Renan.

[Renan] All the shrapnel and the ice that he was kicking down...

was going directly onto me-

like, constant deluge.

And I could really feel that I was losing my fingers and toes.

I started just screaming... and yelling and crying.

That was my absolute last breaking point.

I even said something when I got up there, like, "My feet aren't doing so well."

They didn't even acknowledge what I said.

They were talking about spending the night there.

[Jimmy] Conrad and I are having a conversation like...

"Is there a spot to bivy? Is there a spot for us to spend the night?"

Trying to sleep perched on this tiny little corner...

at 20,000 feet without sleeping bags...

and risk fingers and toes.

[Jimmy] What if we push on? Should we push on?

If you go for it and you spend the night out...

there's a probability that's higher than you want...

that you... aren't gonna come back.

Just shy of the summit.

It's 4:00, and we're at 17 days.

- We're fuckin' roasted. - Started out this morning at midnight.

If we go today and attempt to the summit, that means we're gonna be out tonight...

and an unplanned bivouac at 20,000 feet in really cold climate...

without proper protection and without sufficient food...

just doesn't make any sense.

[Renan] It's over.

A hundred meters short of the summit.

We just don't have the safety margin to make it.

It's not easy turning around. But-

Fuck, this thing was an ass-kicker.

Maybe it just wasn't meant to be climbed.

But I'm not coming back.

I mean, that's just so-

[Jimmy Fitting?]

- The center of the universe is- - Unattainable.

[Renan's Voice] When we finally made the decision to go down...

it was a relief.

Uh, it was also heartbreaking.

Our feet are... hammered and we're just emaciated.

[Renan] When we got down off the mountain...

our condition was this combination of frostbite and trench foot.

Trench foot is what you get...

when your feet and your hands are in this wet, damp condition...

for a long period of time, and they start to rot.

I came back in a wheelchair. I couldn't really walk for a few weeks.

All of us gave it our best. We pushed our limits.

Uh, there was something left undone.

But... I was possessed.

I wasn't even down, and I was like...

"Okay, do I come back in pre-monsoon, post-monsoon?

When are we gonna do it, and what do we gotta do better this time?"

[Jimmy] After 2008, Renan and I ended up on a bunch of different shoots together.

We went all over the world. We were in Chad, Africa.

We were in Borneo.

We worked on a ton of jobs together.

We knew that there were a number of teams who attempted the Shark's Fin after us.

And then this great Slovenian climber named Silvo Karo...

called Conrad to ask for beta- ask for information on the route.

And so we gave him our total support. We weren't being possessive of the climb.

We weren't- it wasn't- We don't own that mountain.

We were like, "Here it is. Here's what we learned."

And, "Finish the story of the Shark's Fin."

Because then we don't have to go back. It's done.

[Jimmy] And we kind of assumed Silvo would get it.

And then I got a call from Conrad, you know.

And all he said was, "He didn't get it."

At that point we're like, "Okay." Gears turning. "We're going back."

[Chuckles] They say the best Alpinists are the ones with the worst memory.

[Birds Tweeting]

[Jimmy] About six months before we were supposed to head to Meru...

on our second attempt...

Renan and I were out shooting a commercial project in Jackson Hole.

It's not too steep up here. The summit's probably right here.

[Jimmy's Voice] I had gotten a call from Jeremy Jones and Xavier de Le Rue...

two of the best big-mountain snowboarders in the world.

In here, is this the steepest part?

[Jimmy's Voice] It was a big job, and I asked Renan to film on it...

even though he wasn't a great skier.

This line, below this is, like, thousands of cliffs.

I'm stoked. Those are the first turns I've ever made with Jeremy and Xav.

- Bodes well.

That was awesome.

[Jimmy] We were headed down together when I saw Renan catch an edge.

And he spun out of control and disappeared over a cliff.

Oh. Oh!

I got down to him, and there was blood all around his head.

-... - [Man] I got it.

He'd smashed his skull, and you could see into his head.

I thought he was gonna die... in my arms.

- I felt responsible.

[Man] He has an open, depressed skull fracture with pneumocephali...

which is air inside the skull.

And... he has a C2 teardrop fracture and lateral mass fracture...

as well as a C6 spinous process fracture.

We came out, okay?

He's gonna be immobilized for a long time. They're gonna take him to surgery.

Any sort of, like, significant risks during the surgery?

Absolutely.

So they tell us we can see him and they roll him out, and he just looked-

I- I mean, I recognized him, but-

I mean, he looked so beat down.

So when I found you, you were... face down... in a pile.

You essentially had, like, a triangle about that big-

about that big where I could see your skull.

[Jimmy's Voice] Renan had landed on his head and severely fractured his skull.

He broke two vertebrae in his neck.

He severed one of his vertebral arteries.

And basically cut off half the blood flow to his brain.

I asked, I said, "Well, what are we talkin' about here?"

They were like, "90% of people with any one of these injuries will never walk again."

His head injury- They were saying, you know-

it was within a millimeter of him being a vegetable.

- Here we are- - [Conrad's Voice] I got a call from Jimmy.

He said, "There's been a really severe accident."

And I drove down right away.

We had this moment where it was...

"You're gonna be fine. Things are good."

And we got up and we got the walker...

and we walked from east to west on the linoleum floor.

[Chuckles]

- Recovery mode. - Yeah.

Let's go somewhere quick, so we can get our job done.

Yep.

- September. - Exactly.

[Conrad's Voice] At the time, he was like, "I want to go to Meru."

But I didn't want to be like, "Dude, you're hooped. I mean, come on."

You don't have the heart to tell someone something's impossible.

You're not gonna stuff 'em right at that moment and say...

"Dude, what are you talkin' about? You're never goin' back to Meru.

You're never goin' climbing." You just don't say those kind of things.

We'll see how it- see how it does at altitude at some point.

[Jimmy] Once I knew Renan was stable...

I headed back to Jackson to try and finish the job.

[Jeremy] As far as Jimmy coming back...

no one would have said anything if Jimmy said, "I'm not going to do it."

"Um, I'm done."

Those are real personal decisions.

It was kind of a, "All right, you have to get back on the horse" mentality.

Five, four, three, two, one.

- Xavier de Le Rue.

Dropping!

[Jeremy] The general mood was pretty light.

Our objective for the day had been reached. Good vibes.

Our conversation before dropping in was...

go one at a time, make sure everyone's in a safe spot.

Dropping!

[Jimmy] So, Jeremy made a couple turns.

Cut up on the side of this safe zone.

Called me in, and I make a turn right next to his turn.

And then- And then I feel it-

The whole slope shift.

[Rumbling]

[Jeremy] I yell, "Avalanche."

Just screaming, "Get out, get out, get out."

[Jimmy] For a moment, it looks like slow motion.

And the next moment, everything went to fast-forward.

And it just- I got swept.

I'm airborne.

Totally weightless.

And I lost sight of him. That was the last I saw of Jimmy.

And the slide just kept going and going and going and going.

[Rumbling]

[Jimmy] I just got crushed under an ocean of car-sized blocks.

Probably going 70, 80 miles an hour...

down 2,000 vertical feet.

And in my mind, I heard this voice...

having this conversation that was like...

"Wow, I- I always wondered how I was gonna die...

and now- now I know."

I was just expecting to get torn to pieces.

But after a while, it started to slow down.

And this weird undercurrent started pushing me up through the snow.

And at the last moment...

I popped out of the toe of this thing...

buried up to my chest.

I was in that moment being like, "Oh, my God. I'm in one piece."

Like, I coughed up this huge chunk of snow, and I took this huge breath...

and I was like-

And I looked at my arms, and I was like, I mean...

I couldn't even believe they were still connected to my body.

And then, um-

Yeah, it was a lot.

[Jeremy] It was really difficult to descend and felt like forever.

But I come around the corner...

and way out at the very bottom...

of the biggest debris fields I've ever seen...

is Jimmy sitting upright.

[Exhales Sharply]

[Jimmy] I haven't seen a fuckin' slide- [Chuckles]

[Jeremy's Voice] This avalanche has trumped all avalanches I've ever seen.

I couldn't help but think, "Jimmy's dead."

I just can't believe that he survived it.

Oh, boy!

- Whoo!

[Jeremy] We just saw a miracle.

[Xavier] Yeah, they saw a miracle.

Or I saw superhuman effort. I saw somethin'. I don't know.

[Jimmy] Most people don't survive those kinds of avalanches.

People die in a lot lesser avalanches.

So I got really lucky.

Took off for a while. I disappeared off the map...

and I needed some time to really contemplate.

[Grace] After Renan's near-death accident...

Jimmy was extremely shaken.

And then the avalanche four days later.

It really contributed to him reexamining his life.

He'd been given a second chance, and so what do you do with a second chance?

[Krakauer] So, Jimmy survived this thing that people don't survive...

and he was really messed up.

He was in a bad way psychologically.

And this makes you doubt your judgment about everything.

He bailed from various commitments.

He's not goin' anywhere. He's certainly not goin' to Meru.

Renan can't go to Meru. He's crippled, maybe for life. Seriously.

You know, no one knew if Renan was gonna come out of this.

[Conrad] Renan and I got together. He had his neck brace on...

and he was in his La-Z-Boy chair.

And he was kind of like this.

I'm offering encouragement. I'm like, "Yes, we can do this.

This is- This is good."

Yet, in the back of my mind, I knew that I might have to be-

it might be, "Renan, you're just physically are not prepared to go back to Meru."

[Jenni] I think Conrad was the driving force for the entire trip.

At first I didn't want him to go back, but it was just that loyalty to Mugs...

and wanting to fulfill that shared dream.

Having climbed mountains myself, I understood that.

Especially if it's a first ascent. No one's been there before you.

[Jimmy] After some time off and- and some serious contemplation...

the idea of not skiing and not climbing and not being in the mountains...

um, was- was too much to- to imagine.

I just wasn't ready to give it all up.

[Renan] There was only five months until we were supposed to leave for Meru.

It was a pretty serious point in time where...

I didn't care that I was injured.

I just cared that I wasn't going to be able to join the team again.

Can I have you bring your arms up like so?

[Renan Continuing] And I'm sure, to my friends and family, that was really hard...

because they just wanted to see me okay.

I just feel bad to put them through that.

[Doctor] One of the fractures is this thing back here...

which is so far displaced that that's not gonna really heal.

This is the second fracture.

[Renan] One of the biggest question marks was the vertebral artery.

I'd lost half the blood supply to my brain...

and climbing at altitude, there's a high risk of...

some sort of blood clot getting through that artery...

and giving me a stroke during the climb.

But for me, it was worth the risk.

It was something that I had to do.

It was worth possibly dying for.

I mean, in my mind, I thought it was-

I thought it was crazy that he wanted to go back.

But I realize that Meru for him was something to hold onto.

For him, it was like, "This is my dream."

To come back and climb Meru...

and prove to himself that he had the capacity to make a comeback.

And I- I understood it as well...

because, in a way, I needed the same thing, you know.

- The bike.

[Jimmy] Renan had put his heart and mind into recovering.

And the way that he had progressed was...

almost inhuman.

Conrad and I were gonna go back to Meru.

But we still had to make a decision about Renan.

And Renan was... pretty adamant about going.

It was this moment when the three of us got together...

and Jimmy made the case for Renan to come along.

[Jenni] I was against Renan going on the climb.

I just confronted Jimmy and I said, "You know...

I am not keen about this.

You know, you can't take Renan up there.

I mean, what if he dies?"

But I couldn't talk Jimmy into throwing Renan off the trip. [Laughs]

It's like he was totally dug in.

He just said, flat out, "If Renan feels he's ready, I trust Renan."

[Jenni] I was worried about Renan.

[Jenni Continuing] But I was also worried about the well-being of the entire team...

because... just to go up onto a face like that with a weak partner...

where, what if they got into another big, bad storm?

- [Jenni Continuing] Or what if one of 'em...

got wacked in the head with a rock...

and they had to get him down off, and they-

You need to have your partners be sound and strong.

You know, when our friends heard about it, they were like-

They thought we were completely out of our minds.

Whew. Dude, I don't know.

No! No! You know, that's not right.

This isn't like Conrad, or Jimmy.

You know, these guys, they don't fuck around, they don't do stupid stuff.

If they did, they'd be dead by now.

Two or three times, I had these deep anxiety attacks.

I mean, here it was, at 2:00 in the morning, and all of a sudden it was just like...

this wave of anxiety came over me, and I'm- I'm up there, like, going, "Shit."

I've got two kids sleeping upstairs. My wife's there.

Another boy's off at college. I'm responsible for them.

And I'm going, "You're going back?"

You know, the rewards of climbing are huge.

If you- if you survive it, if your family comes out of it okay...

if everyone comes out, then climbing- climbing is so worth it.

The problem is, as we know, you don't always come out of it okay.

People die. And then you can't justify it. That is the great dilemma.

Conrad knows this better than anyone.

Look at what happened to Mugs, and Conrad's next partner, Alex.

[Conrad] After the death of Mugs in '92...

Alex Lowe became my main climbing partner.

Alex was the premier climber at that time.

Conrad was Alex's favorite partner...

and best friend.

Conrad was just right for him...

because he could match Alex's pace.

And there wasn't too many people who could do that.

This is Nirvana, what this is.

So we're gonna hang out, just enjoy the mountains.

[Krakauer] You know, Mugs was the mentor...

but Alex was much more Conrad's equal.

These are, you know, two of the most brilliant climbers ever.

I mean, people were blown away by 'em.

And they fed off each other!

They were this perfect match, the perfect partnership.

I went to Antarctica with both Alex and Conrad in '97...

in one of the best trips I've ever done, and they were in rare form.

Just brilliant to behold.

So he had this new partner, and they were gonna tear up the world.

[Conrad] Alex did a remarkable job of balancing family.

We were all sort of vagabonds.

And here's Alex. He's, like, legit. He's married, and he's got kids.

I was married to Alex Lowe for 18 years.

And, um, in the autumn of 1999...

uh, he was on an expedition with Conrad.

It was to Shishapangma, in Tibet.

And, uh, they went up to take a look at the mountain.

[Conrad] It was supposed to be a rest day.

David Bridges, Alex and I went up, getting ready to do the climb...

and we got to this point- it was probably 7:30, 8:00 in the morning.

All of a sudden, there was, like, this crack, and we looked up and it was, "Oh, shit."

There was a- a release.

[Jenni] Before Alex left, I had this weird premonition.

I didn't want him to go on the climb.

I said, you know...

"I'm worried that you're gonna die in an avalanche."

And Alex said, "I always come home."

[Rumbling]

[Conrad] Alex and David ran straight downhill. I traversed at an angle.

I was like, "I'm gonna lay down before the avalanche hits."

And as I looked over, David and Alex were still upright, and they were still running.

I was picked up and thrown, battered, tumbled.

And just kind of half-buried.

And then... it was silent.

I remember standing up and walking around...

and going over to where I had seen them, and there was nothing there.

There was no ski stick or a glove sticking out of the snow or anything like that.

Our other teammates came up to help with the search...

and we searched there for the better part of the day.

I went back down to camp. I needed some medical attention.

[Jenni] I got the phone call. I thought it was Alex at first.

And Andrew's voice came on, and I instantly panicked.

Andrew's like, "Jenni, there's been an avalanche."

You know, and then my heart was racing.

Right away, I said, "Is Conrad there?"

Because, you know, I thought that...

somehow Conrad would've protected Alex.

You know, that it couldn't happen to him if Conrad was there with him.

I remember Jenni saying, "Is there anything else you can do?

Can you go back and look for him?" And we're like, "No. It's just- He's gone."

And it was- it was-

There was, um- There was just this finality of it.

[Krakauer] After Alex died, Conrad went through this transformation.

He was just- He looked gaunt.

He was- He had retreated somewhere deep inside and wasn't comin' out.

I worried he was over the edge and wasn't coming back.

[Conrad] It's just- I mean, the wheels were coming off.

And, um, I didn't know why I was so fucked up.

Gil Roberts, a friend of mine, who was in a very similar situation.

He was there when his climbing partner died.

And more than once, he picked up the phone, and he's like, "Hey, man.

I've gotta come talk to you. We've gotta get together."

And I didn't know why Gil wanted to get ahold of me.

And it was, like-

I remember his line. He's like, "Yep. Survivor's guilt is a bear."

And having to do that. And it was, like-

Because for me, it's, like, this heavy fucking thing...

that wouldn't leave me alone.

'Cause Alex had it going on.

Here he was, he was successful. He had three kids, a happy married life.

Everything was cool, and I lived in a van.

[Jenni] Conrad was filled with remorse over Alex's death...

and he came back from the expedition...

feeling like he was the one who should've died.

[Conrad] Trying to find balance and peace in that...

I just didn't know where to go.

But it always circled back to being with Jenni...

and the conversations that we had on the telephone...

and being together with each other.

[Jenni] I think he felt like...

to continue being a great friend, he needed to be there for us.

It was like a little connection to Alex that was still there for me.

And then, you know, before we- either of us knew what was happening...

we were kind of falling in love.

[Conrad] The duress of this tragedy- Jenni and I, we fell in love.

And then eventually we married, and I have adopted the boys.

[Typing]

[Jenni] I wasn't like I chose and said, "Okay.

I'm gonna fall in love with another climber." It just kind of happened.

I still think I might have been better off with a cowboy.

[Krakauer] Conrad has this side to him that realizes...

"I got some heavy responsibilities here."

it's the key to Conrad. There's this constant dialectic.

He needs the mountains to climb, but it's like, "Am I taking too many chances?

Can I control the risk?" Of course you can't control the risk.

"Well, why am I doing this? Because I have to do it or I go fucking crazy."

[Renan] In the end, Jimmy and Conrad left the decision up to me.

[Shutter Clicks]

Even though it'd only been five months since the accident...

I decided I wanted to give it a go.

[Conrad] We had become so close after the 2008 ordeal...

that to not give him the opportunity-

it wasn't celebrating the teamwork that we came into the climb with.

- That was the decision. - [Exhales]

[Amee] Well, I wasn't really given a choice... in the matter.

Renan actually decided to go to Meru...

and bought a plane ticket and didn't even tell me.

It was kind of a slap in the face, but...

the bigger concern was his safety.

[Jimmy] He knew the heat that we were taking...

and he knew that we had to trust him to let him go.

And that's what we did. We trusted him.

[Krakauer] Maybe that's way over the heads of most people...

that kind of risk and that kind of expression of trust.

But when Conrad was a young buck, and Mugs was teaching him...

they'd be at a really sketchy pitch- dangerous, you can't afford to fall.

Mugs would be like, "Okay, Conrad, we all know that I can lead this.

Now let's see if you can lead it. Are you ready?"

So many decades later, it was Conrad...

saying to Jimmy, Renan, "Okay, you guys had a rough spring.

But you can do this. I trust you, and we're gonna do this."

[Chattering]

[Chanting]

[Jimmy] The entire hike in was intense.

There's no doubt that I had a heavy heart going into it.

It felt just like so much...

pressure.

You know, it felt a little bit like we were heading to the gallows. You know?

[Renan] Fifteen feet, Conrad!

[Equipment Clinking]

[Shouting, indistinct]

[Conrad] The old geek ripped.

- Is that what sent ya? - Yeah.

I just heard the "ping" and then the fucking gear rattling.

Cha-ching, cha-ching.

Oh, it was a good- Of all the places to fall though-

Ah, it's dreamy.

[Jimmy] That was a good place to fall.

It must have been, like, five pounds on you, huh, Renan, like-

[Renan] Yeah. Well, I got lifted off the triangle ledge.

[Fabric Flapping]

[Wind Howling]

- [Rustling] - [Grunting]

Oh! Fuck!

[Jimmy] Oh, man.

[Renan] Survival mode.

It's broke.

We're Himalayan big-wall climbing, and we broke our portaledge.

- That's more straight. - Yeah.

- [Jimmy] Whew. - [Conrad] Athletic tape...

two eye screws, and- and we're back in business.

Whew.

[Man] ♪ One night of magic rush ♪

♪ The start a simple touch ♪

♪ One night to push and scream ♪

♪ And then relief ♪

♪ Ten days of perfect tunes ♪

♪ The colors red and blue ♪

♪ We had a promise made ♪

♪ We were in love ♪

♪ To call for hands of above ♪

[Jimmy] That there is called space hauling.

This route's pretty steep.

That's why all the shit's hanging off in space. [Chuckling]

[Muttering]

[Chuckles] I just had to film what we're eating right now.

Conrad wants us to eat yesterday's leftovers.

Oh, it looks great.

[Conrad] We have one choice on the menu, and it is couscous.

[Jimmy] Tomorrow, what are we having for dinner?

Couscous.

- [Jimmy, Laughing] And the next day? - Couscous.

[Jimmy] What did we have for dinner four days ago?

- Couscous. - [Jimmy] Sweet.

[Conrad] This looks really good, I think.

I'm sure that, uh Happy and Leroy, my two dogs, would just love this.

They'd be like, "Yeah!"

We're not his dogs.

Mmm.

Mmm, couscous.

[Yawns]

Whew.

[Jimmy] I was watching Renan, and he seemed confused and slow.

I thought it might have been the altitude.

I'm not sure what's going on.

[Metal Clinks]

[Renan's Voice] Something was really wrong.

I literally just turned my face away and cried.

[Jimmy] When we finally got the portaledge built and got inside...

that's when Renan really fell apart.

He just collapsed.

♪♪ [Man Vocalizing]

♪♪ [Vocalizing Continues]

[Jimmy] He tried to say something to me...

and it was just complete gibberish.

You know, you could see the alarm in his eyes that, like...

however hard he was trying to speak...

it wasn't happening.

♪♪ [Vocalizing Continues]

It'd been a year and a half earlier that, uh, my father had suffered a stroke...

and I'd seen what it does.

[Exhales Deeply]

You know, we're making calculations in our head, and we're like...

"Well, we can't go down right now.

We'll make a mistake. We're way too wasted."

[Conrad] it was a moment of, uh, anxiety. It was moment of unknown.

It was a moment of acceptance that we might not make it up the route.

Acceptance that- of Renan's health...

that where he was, there was nothing we could do about it.

[Wind Whistling]

[Fabric Flapping]

[Renan] The next morning, the sun was shining.

I felt a little bit better...

but I still couldn't really talk.

All that I could think about is, "I don't want to go down."

"If we go down, then I'll never forgive myself."

I still just felt strongly that I had to contribute to the team and not let us down.

It was my turn to lead.

Those guys didn't want me to go, but I looked up at Jimmy...

nodded, and it was understood that I was going for it.

They were monitoring me very closely.

[Equipment Clinking]

From somewhere, I started to feel this momentum...

and climbing started to feel good.

I couldn't believe I finished my leads.

It was this huge breakthrough for me.

Jimmy and Conrad were still really worried about me...

and they carried most of my weight.

Meru- it's relentless. Every time.

[Renan's Voice] We still don't know what happened that day.

We just smoked a cigarette together and talked about it...

and decided to keep going.

After seven days of climbing, we were just getting to the hard part.

The wall got super steep and overhanging.

[Conrad] This is pitch 20. Jimmy's getting after it.

It's the House of Cards, the start of the Indian Ocean Wall.

[Renan] I knew he was scared.

We all knew any mistake on this pitch could be catastrophic.

[Jimmy] Wow, that's- it looks longer...

than it did last night. [Laughing]

In the House of Cards pitch, they called it that because...

it's these immense blocks of granite.

If you pull one of 'em too hard, this whole thing's gonna come down...

like a house of cards, only each card weighs, you know, 10,000 pounds...

and those sharp edges is gonna just floss 'em all off the wall.

See these giant blocks?

They are moving under my weight.

[Hollow Knocking]

Those are the sounds you don't like to hear.

[Metal Clinking]

[Renan] It was really intense. He was up there for six hours...

and it was exhausting for all of us.

They're on a sloping hill, and when you hit 'em, you watch both of 'em going.

- Yeah, and everything here, I mean- - That would just chop everything.

And then we'd- we'd be fucked.

[Wind Whistling]

- [Fabric Flapping] - Well, it's our summit-bid evening.

And it's dumping.

[Sighs]

[Murmurs]

- [Conrad] More suffering. - [Jimmy] It's been dumping...

- for... - since 3:30.

Five, six hours now.

[Fabric Flapping]

[Jimmy] How's it lookin' out there, Renan?

Well, despite the, uh...

heavy winds and getting battered...

in the ledge for the last four hours...

there's stars...

so we're goin' for it.

[Equipment Jingling]

It's probably negative 20 out.

I can't feel my feet.

But at least it's windy.

[Exhales Sharply]

Just waitin' for the sun.

[Exhaling]

Oh, man, I can't fucking think straight.

[Renan] Good job, Conrad!

[Panting]

[Jimmy] On the summit push, I think all of us...

and probably Conrad the most, was dreading the upper pitches.

Because he knew he was the only one that could do 'em.

And it was a really hard and dangerous lead.

[Renan] Conrad carried a lot of pressure that day.

It's really hard to explain to anyone what he did up there.

[Jimmy] We finally get to the summit ridge, where we turned around in 2008.

And we hadn't really talked about who was gonna take the last lead.

And that was the final, unknown section.

Conrad looked at me, and he was like, "All right."

[Conrad] I was like, "Jimmy, this is your lead.

It's your turn to take the reigns."

[Groans]

[Panting]

[Conrad] Nice, Jimmy.

Whoo!

Whoo!

- Yeah, Renan. - Fuck, yeah.

[Laughing]

Yeah.

Yeah, Mugs!

Got it for ya!

[Panting]

[Breathing Raggedly]

[Exhales Sharply]

Ten years of climbing together.

[Renan] There was-

There was some points where I didn't think I was gonna make it.

And I know it stressed those guys out a lot, so-

Definitely happy to be up here...

and, uh, take part in Conrad's 20-year dream...

and 10 years of Jimmy and Conrad climbing together...

and... yeah, feel part of the team.

[Woman] ♪ When the cold bites your bones ♪

♪ And gets in your heart ♪

♪ It can make you feel hopeless ♪

♪ And fear will come to steal your sun and make it dark ♪

♪ But don't believe you're lonely ♪

♪ We've all had that moment when our shoulders sink ♪

♪ And we sit back and think ♪

♪ We could just run ♪

♪ But we're not born to chase the fading light ♪

♪ We're not born to fall and lose the fight ♪

♪ Never letting go Oh, no, oh ♪

♪ I'm askin' you to lift me, lift me higher than I ever been ♪

I Hold your breath and say you're gonna come with me ♪

♪ We were born to follow ♪

♪ The light that never fails ♪

♪♪ [Woman Vocalizing]

♪ You're scared to fight, you're scared to climb, afraid to die ♪

♪ But I can be your courage ♪

♪ And help you see you've already won this ♪

♪ We all have that moment when our head hangs low ♪

♪ We question if we should go ♪

♪ Or turn back and run ♪

♪ But we're not born to chase the fading light ♪

♪ We're not born to fall and lose the fight ♪

♪ Never letting go Oh, no, oh ♪

♪ I'm askin' you to lift me, lift me higher than I ever been ♪

I Hold your breath and say you're gonna come with me ♪

♪ We were born to follow ♪

♪ The light that never fails ♪

♪ Come along We're settin' sail ♪

♪ Never looking back again ♪

♪ We're not born to chase the fading light ♪

♪ We're not born to fall and lose the fight ♪

♪ Never letting go Oh, no, oh ♪

♪ I'm askin' you to lift me, lift me higher than I ever been ♪

♪ Hold your breath and say you're gonna come with me ♪

♪ We were born to follow ♪

♪ The light that never fails ♪

♪ The light that never fails ♪

♪ We were born to follow ♪

- ♪ The light that never ♪ - ♪♪ [Vocalizing]

- ♪ Light that never ♪ - ♪♪ [Vocalizing]

♪ The light that never fails ♪♪