Original subtitles

[upbeat music]

[in French]

[exhales sharply]

[beeps]

[in English] Yeah?

Toto, I need a favor.

I can't do it, man.

I can't get in the building, I don't know why.

It's like my files have been erased during the night.

Jesus, man, it's...

It's unfortunate.

Wait.

You know about this?

What?

No.

Toto?

I know nothing! Ingeborg didn't tell me

anything about Michel firing you!

Why are you mentioning Ingeborg?

What?

I don't remember that.

Is she plotting something?

You got to let me in, okay?

[suspenseful music]

Okay, but it's not because I like you

that's because I feel terrible

about that fake tabling desk episode, okay?

The fake what?

-What? -The fake what?

Dude man...

The fake...?

I'm gonna be down in five.

Down in five.

[exhales sharply]

[gibbers]

[in French]

[in English] We did it, Ma'am.

Hi. I still need you to sign me off today.

Oh, yeah, of course, pet.

Just packing away a few things, you know.

I've always loved Strasbourg.

People talk about waste,

but there's a whole second Parliament

that nobody ever uses.

[giggles]

Is that a signed photo of the Queen?

Yeah. Not by her Maj. It's a gift from Nigel.

-Right. -Don't want any flags, do you?

-I seem to have plenty. -No.

I won't need them.

I thought about it, but there are so many there.

Yeah.

So, it's just this one little signature.

I know, what about

a farewell drink this afternoon? Like a cup of coffee?

To say goodbye would be nice, wouldn't it?

-I'll sign it then. -Okay.

Great. Lovely. A drink. Good, good.

-Rose? -Yes?

Weren't you wearing the same clothes yesterday?

No, I don't think so.

-You don't think so? -No, I don't. Bye.

I don't know, do I want them? No. Just chuck them...

Sorry, sorry, love.

[tense music]

Hey, thanks, man.

Really, thanks.

[chuckles]

I owe you.

Just buy me leather stuff. I like that.

[laughs]

World Wurst Festival!

How is this guy allowed and not me?

It's the World Wurst Festival.

The entire Parliament waits for it all year.

-What? I've never heard of it. -Yeah.

Maybe it's not the entire Parliament,

maybe it's mainly the Germans.

-It's actually just the Germans. -Michel?

[dramatic music]

-He's taking the piss. -Just go!

[panting]

[in French]

[sighs]

[clicks tongue]

[playful music]

[door opens and closes]

[in English] Is that working?

Can you hear me?

Do you want to jump over to Skype?

No, we don't use Skype. It's a competitor.

Yeah. No. It's good.

-Connection's great. -Just give me a second.

Sorry, I'm just downloading

a BitTorrent of sex-positive, female-directed pornography.

It was eating up my bandwidth. I just canceled that.

Good.

I can't tell if you're joking. [laughs]

Let's change the topic.

I'm really excited to get out there.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow, wow!

I mean, Rose,

we've been saying fuck, yeah about you coming

all freaking past week.

In celebration, we've been micro-dosing like crazy.

When I was with my masseuse last week,

I thought I didn't have your Insta.

Yeah.

I need that. You have that, right?

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Um...

I'll send you the details, soon.

The details?

Yeah, my log name.

I can't... I've lost you again.

Can you hear me?

-What were you saying? -Yes, so anyway,

After our little pow-wow over the bonfire last week...

-What does that mean? -..we discussed your salary,

We think it's a good offer.

So we can just send you the contract

and we're good-good-good to go.

Great. Perfect.

I guess I could just scroll down

to the bottom and click "Accept".

Rose...

-Yeah? -We don't joke about privacy

here at Facebook, so...

Yeah, of course.

Of course.

Okay. Bye.

Bye.

Wow. Just a joke.

[instrumental music]

[in French]

[suspenseful music]

[in English]

Don't bother this guy, he has a lot of troubles.

[in French]

[instrumental music]

[in English] One, two, three,

four, five, six, seven, eight,

nine, ten.

[exhales]

Lovely.

Where is it you're going again?

Something with Internet phones?

-Facebook. -Of course.

Will you thank them

from me for all they did for the Brexit campaign?

We couldn't have done it without them.

And what they did for Trump?

Terrific job!

Yeah, I'll pass it on.

I just want to say thank you again.

I appreciate you signing me off early.

It's the least I can do, isn't it?

I don't know what I would've done without you.

[laughs]

I can't believe it. We tore the place down!

-Didn't we, Rose? -Did we?

I think everybody did their bit.

You know, it's like

a little butterfly will flap his wings

here, in the Parliament,

and on the other side of the world,

hundreds and hundreds and hundreds die.

Right, but

History doesn't blame the butterfly for that.

The butterfly just does her job.

Yeah. It's funny, though.

You dedicate your whole life to something and...

[sighs]

The funny thing is, I suppose,

what's worse than not getting what you want?

Sometimes, it's getting what you want.

Yeah. So...

Well.

-I guess this is it. -Yes.

I'm gonna miss you, pet.

Oh!

I'm honestly surprised to say:

I'm gonna miss you too, Sharon.

I guess there's something I can do

here, in the Parliament.

I could always help somebody...

maybe keep the UK away?

Yeah.

I'm sure they'd like that.

There we go.

Thank you.

-It's great. -Just one thing.

Give your hand.

Love you!

-I do! -You're a good one.

[lively music]

[in French]

[in English] Hey, hi.

What are you doing here?

[in Spanish]

[in French]

[in English]

How's it going?

Not good. We don't have the majority.

I got to postpone the vote at 7:50 pm

cos the president won't stay after 8 pm,

but it won't be enough.

I'm sorry.

Weren't you wearing the same clothes yesterday?

[in French]

[in English] What are you doing?

Just a memory.

I really need to pad out my Instagram.

But I refuse to take pictures of food.

Nice.

[in French]

[in English] Hello, sir, the sharks.

-You're good. -Yeah? I don't know.

[clears throat]

-Friend request. Guess who? -Torsten?

Yeah.

It's the entire time we've known each other.

[chuckles]

[in French]

[in English] Have you done the shark thing

this whole time?

No, I've done a lot of other things.

Like what?

Like...

Try to make you like me.

-And I sort of managed. -Sort of.

Very almost.

[in French]

[in English] And now you're leaving.

And the amendment is as dead as the sharks I didn't save.

In fifteen minutes,

it will all be over.

Oh, it's the sausage fest.

Okay, you don't care.

No, Toto's just posted that.

Is that why the president wants to leave at eight?

He's German, no?

Yeah.

Did I say something very offensive?

Well, yes, but it's about the Germans, so it's okay.

[in French]

[in English] If the Germans

want to leave at eight,

that's when you want the vote to happen.

What?

How do you win a vote if you have the majority against you?

You get a large chunk of your opponents

to not vote.

-Okay. -Trump taught us that.

-Oh, right. Hello. -Hi. Sharks.

-Yes, right? -Yeah.

It's so great to have an evil friend.

Yeah!

[in French]

[in English] Save the sharks.

I love you.

-As a friend. -Yes.

I appreciate that. As a friend.

-Okay. -The sharks!

How will you fill those ten minutes?

[instrumental music]

[speaking in foreign language]

[in German]

[in English] Oh, shit, they're on time.

We're next on the agenda.

Ten minutes till the Germans leave. If they do.

-Yeah. But I have a plan.

[in German]

[in English] Is that your plan?

Have Cornelius make a point of order?

That's gonna buy a few minutes max.

-Will it? -If I could make a...

point of

order at this stage.

My God, you're going to hell, you know that?

You gotta do what you gotta do.

..of the rules of this...

Parliament.

I would like to come...

I would like to come...

We'll still need five more minutes.

Yeah, maybe

some will have a change of heart and vote differently.

I don't think that ever happens.

At least, you understand how Parliament works.

Yeah, right before I get fired.

Thank you for your

attention.

[in German]

[suspenseful music]

[speaking in German]

[in English] Here it goes!

[in German]

[in English] Excuse me.

[in German]

[in French]

[in German]

[in French]

[dramatic music]

[indistinct chatter]

[chuckles]

[in English] Hey.

Hey.

You think it's the time for this?

I don't think you can eat here.

This isn't for eating.

This is for luring.

Are you gonna stake the future of sharks on the stereotype

-that Germans love sausages? -Look!

[laughs]

He's leaving.

I didn't think that would work.

It's working.

Is it us?

[in French]

[indistinct chatter]

[in English]

Okay... How many do we need?

[in French]

[in English]

-Thank you. -No food is allowed in here.

-I know. -Come with me, please.

[giggles]

-Yeah, okay. Sure. -See you later.

-Please! -What?

I didn't...

I was the one with the sausages.

You have to go.

He's fine, I'll go.

[light music]

[in German]

[in French]

[cheering]

[in English]

-That's... Whoa! -Yes, sorry.

I'm gonna see the press conference.

Yes, go.

[exhales]

Eamon?

[in French]

[laughs]

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music continues]

[in English]

-You don't have any luggage? -Shut up!

[giggling]

-Alright. -Yeah.

Are we going to stay in touch?

Yeah, I mean if...

You've got Instagram? I'm kind of a big deal

-on Instagram now. -I've heard.

[car honks]

Yes.

Right.

Yeah.

Okay.

We'll stay in touch. Yeah.

And remember, before I go,

you're not an arsehole, Samy,

you're just trying so hard to be.

Is that from The Social Network?

Yes, I watched it.

I couldn't think of anything cool to say.

-Quite cool. -Yeah.

I think... so.

One last try?

Sure.

Okay.

[giggles]

I was just...

I was doing three.

Yeah.

It's actually two here.

I know. It's just...

I was doing a little

-one specifically for you. -Okay.

So...

-Okay! -Yeah.

Bye.

Bye.

[door closes]

You should run after her.

No, it's too humiliating.

I'm gonna text her that I love her

as soon as she's gonna be out of reach.

Okay.

Rose, Rose!

Don't go!

They're postponing Brexit.

Theresa May said it's not happening yet.

It's a scandal.

[laughs]

I'm so angry.

We're not taking back control yet.

[suspenseful music]

[suspenseful music continues]