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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,788 --> 00:00:07,833 Thanks again, Calvin, for helping with this. 2 00:00:07,877 --> 00:00:09,748 I have no idea what's stuck in there. 3 00:00:09,792 --> 00:00:11,924 No problem. You know, normally I would say 4 00:00:11,968 --> 00:00:13,361 this is a job for your husband, 5 00:00:13,404 --> 00:00:16,712 but then I remembered you're married to Dave. 6 00:00:17,669 --> 00:00:19,410 Where is he anyway? 7 00:00:19,454 --> 00:00:20,933 Band practice. 8 00:00:20,977 --> 00:00:22,674 He started one with some of the other dads at the school. 9 00:00:22,718 --> 00:00:24,154 Oh.What's it called-- 10 00:00:24,198 --> 00:00:25,808 "Earth, Wind & No Fire"? 11 00:00:26,678 --> 00:00:29,464 Uh, oh, they bring the fire. 12 00:00:29,507 --> 00:00:31,248 Dave looks so hot up on stage. 13 00:00:31,292 --> 00:00:34,295 If I wasn't the principal, I'd totally take my bra off 14 00:00:34,338 --> 00:00:36,471 and throw it at him. 15 00:00:36,514 --> 00:00:38,734 I feel that way whenever Calvin fixes something. 16 00:00:38,777 --> 00:00:41,824 I wear the one with tassels whenever it's a big job. 17 00:00:43,782 --> 00:00:46,002 [metallic clinking]Okay, all right, I think I got it. 18 00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:49,179 Ah. It's just a spoon. 19 00:00:49,223 --> 00:00:52,052 Well, I can't leave these girls hanging for that one, 20 00:00:52,095 --> 00:00:53,749 but good job, baby. 21 00:00:53,792 --> 00:00:55,055 [laughs] 22 00:00:56,012 --> 00:00:57,622 Hey, sweetie. How was band practice? 23 00:00:57,666 --> 00:00:59,798 Ah, terrible. You're never gonna believe what happened. 24 00:00:59,842 --> 00:01:02,932 Let me guess. You realized you formed a dad band? 25 00:01:04,107 --> 00:01:06,936 No. We were in the middle of practice 26 00:01:06,979 --> 00:01:10,070 when our lead singer Neil blew out his vocal cords. 27 00:01:10,113 --> 00:01:12,420 Oh, no. Was he going for the high note? 28 00:01:12,463 --> 00:01:15,684 No, a spider landed on the microphone and he screamed. 29 00:01:16,815 --> 00:01:18,513 But you guys were supposed 30 00:01:18,556 --> 00:01:20,732 to play the school fundraiser next week. 31 00:01:20,776 --> 00:01:22,212 You've got to find another singer. 32 00:01:22,256 --> 00:01:23,735 Are you kidding? 33 00:01:23,779 --> 00:01:25,998 Gemma, you can't just replace someone like Neil. 34 00:01:26,042 --> 00:01:29,089 I mean, Neil has stage presence, he has flair. 35 00:01:29,132 --> 00:01:30,873 Plus, he's the only dad at the school 36 00:01:30,916 --> 00:01:33,310 that actually makes a ponytail look cool. 37 00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:36,618 Well, if it'd help you out, 38 00:01:36,661 --> 00:01:38,707 I'd be happy to be your lead singer. 39 00:01:38,750 --> 00:01:40,361 [gasps]You-you would? 40 00:01:40,404 --> 00:01:42,102 Oh, my God, that's a great idea! 41 00:01:42,145 --> 00:01:45,714 Tina, you're like a professional-level singer. 42 00:01:45,757 --> 00:01:47,542 You don't want to embarrass yourself 43 00:01:47,585 --> 00:01:50,588 playing with a bunch of no-talent hacks. 44 00:01:50,632 --> 00:01:52,112 No offense. 45 00:01:54,418 --> 00:01:55,985 I think it'd be fun. 46 00:01:56,028 --> 00:01:58,335 So, what do you say, Dave? 47 00:01:58,379 --> 00:02:00,163 I say congratulations.Ah! 48 00:02:00,207 --> 00:02:02,687 You are officially the new lead singer 49 00:02:02,731 --> 00:02:04,820 of The Dadditudes.Yeah! 50 00:02:06,430 --> 00:02:08,693 [quietly]: Dadditudes? 51 00:02:08,737 --> 00:02:10,217 Here you go, babe. 52 00:02:10,260 --> 00:02:12,480 You can use this spoon to gag yourself. 53 00:02:13,611 --> 00:02:16,005 ♪ Welcome to the block, welcome to the neighborhood ♪ 54 00:02:16,048 --> 00:02:17,398 ♪ Welcome to the hood. 55 00:02:22,925 --> 00:02:25,145 [playing warm-up music] 56 00:02:26,798 --> 00:02:28,713 See the cute guitarist? 57 00:02:28,757 --> 00:02:30,802 He's my boyfriend. 58 00:02:30,846 --> 00:02:33,414 Look, I'm glad that you and Dad love each other, 59 00:02:33,457 --> 00:02:36,243 but do me a favor and keep it to yourself. 60 00:02:36,286 --> 00:02:38,027 [scoffs] 61 00:02:38,070 --> 00:02:41,683 Hey, everyone.Sorry I'm late. 62 00:02:41,726 --> 00:02:43,075 It's not her fault. 63 00:02:43,119 --> 00:02:45,252 I was working on the furnace at home. 64 00:02:45,295 --> 00:02:48,516 And what can I say? Things got hot. 65 00:02:49,517 --> 00:02:50,735 Oh, seriously, 66 00:02:50,779 --> 00:02:53,564 what is it with you married people? 67 00:02:55,305 --> 00:02:56,698 Come on, Calvin. 68 00:02:56,741 --> 00:02:58,787 The groupie section'sover here. 69 00:02:58,830 --> 00:03:00,136 Well, I'm a man, Gemma. 70 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:02,138 I can't be called a groupie. 71 00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:05,533 I prefer the term "bodyguard with benefits." 72 00:03:05,576 --> 00:03:07,274 Ooh. 73 00:03:08,100 --> 00:03:09,624 Hey, so, guys, let me introduce you 74 00:03:09,667 --> 00:03:11,321 to Tina.Tina, this is the guys. 75 00:03:11,365 --> 00:03:13,018 Brett, Phil.Hey.TINA: Hey. 76 00:03:13,062 --> 00:03:15,064 Hey, so did you get a chanceto check out the set list? 77 00:03:15,107 --> 00:03:18,110 Oh, yeah. I love the Pat Benatar song we're doing. 78 00:03:18,154 --> 00:03:21,679 ♪ You're a heartbreaker 79 00:03:21,723 --> 00:03:26,902 ♪ Dream maker, love taker,don't you mess around with me. ♪ 80 00:03:29,687 --> 00:03:32,124 Oh, my God, she's amazing. 81 00:03:32,168 --> 00:03:33,865 I know. If I had that bra with the tassels 82 00:03:33,909 --> 00:03:37,478 she left by the furnace, I woulddefinitely throw it at her. 83 00:03:37,521 --> 00:03:39,088 [laughs] 84 00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:46,530 Hey, hey, little bro. Hey. 85 00:03:46,574 --> 00:03:49,838 I hope you have not eaten,because dinner is on me. 86 00:03:49,881 --> 00:03:51,883 [chuckles]Oh, no. 87 00:03:51,927 --> 00:03:53,407 You're being nice. 88 00:03:53,450 --> 00:03:55,496 What did you do to me that I don't know about yet? 89 00:03:55,539 --> 00:03:57,062 Will you relax? 90 00:03:57,106 --> 00:03:58,673 We are celebrating because I got a raise today. 91 00:03:58,716 --> 00:04:01,023 But since I'min a good mood, 92 00:04:01,066 --> 00:04:03,286 don't use your shampoo. 93 00:04:04,679 --> 00:04:06,028 Wait. JPL gave you a raise 94 00:04:06,071 --> 00:04:08,030 after only being there for a year? 95 00:04:08,073 --> 00:04:09,423 Yeah. So? 96 00:04:09,466 --> 00:04:10,859 So, I've been there three years, 97 00:04:10,902 --> 00:04:12,121 and I haven't gotten a raise. 98 00:04:12,164 --> 00:04:14,297 Well, why haven't you askedfor one? 99 00:04:14,341 --> 00:04:17,605 Because, man, my boss is this weird, needy dude 100 00:04:17,648 --> 00:04:19,563 who's always trying to make everyone his best friend. 101 00:04:19,607 --> 00:04:22,087 I'm telling you, talking to that guy is not a good idea. 102 00:04:22,131 --> 00:04:23,785 Oh, come on, man.Just go in there 103 00:04:23,828 --> 00:04:25,743 and tell himyou deserve a raise. 104 00:04:25,787 --> 00:04:27,354 The worst thinghe can say is "no." 105 00:04:27,397 --> 00:04:29,051 Okay, but what am I supposed to do when he's acting 106 00:04:29,094 --> 00:04:31,314 like we're "best buds" and starts going on 107 00:04:31,358 --> 00:04:34,230 and on and on about some problem from his life 108 00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:35,710 that I could care less about? 109 00:04:35,753 --> 00:04:38,669 You can try what I dowhenever I'm in that situation. 110 00:04:38,713 --> 00:04:40,410 Oh. What?This. 111 00:04:46,329 --> 00:04:48,331 [band playing inside] 112 00:04:48,375 --> 00:04:53,597 ♪ Oh, yeah, heartbreaker 113 00:04:53,641 --> 00:04:55,338 ♪ Yeah! 114 00:04:55,382 --> 00:04:58,602 Oh, man, that was incredible. 115 00:04:58,646 --> 00:05:00,343 I'm gonna have Gemma check the sprinkler system, 116 00:05:00,387 --> 00:05:03,259 because we are gonna set that gymnasium on fire! 117 00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:04,913 Forget the fundraiser. 118 00:05:04,956 --> 00:05:06,131 If we keep playing this good, 119 00:05:06,175 --> 00:05:08,220 we could crack the bar mitzvah circuit. 120 00:05:08,264 --> 00:05:10,440 I got to say, this... this has really come together. 121 00:05:10,484 --> 00:05:12,921 I don't think we can sound much better than that. 122 00:05:12,964 --> 00:05:14,270 What do you think, Tina? 123 00:05:14,314 --> 00:05:16,446 Yeah, it was good. 124 00:05:17,969 --> 00:05:19,014 Whew. 125 00:05:19,057 --> 00:05:20,624 You only thought it was good? 126 00:05:20,668 --> 00:05:23,235 Yeah, it was definitely better than when we started. 127 00:05:23,279 --> 00:05:25,803 But you know what? There's always room for improvement. 128 00:05:25,847 --> 00:05:27,501 Right? 129 00:05:27,544 --> 00:05:29,677 Well, yeah, absolutely. What were you thinking? 130 00:05:29,720 --> 00:05:32,854 Or as Pat Benatar would say, "Hit us with your best shot." 131 00:05:34,290 --> 00:05:35,944 Okay, well, for starters, 132 00:05:35,987 --> 00:05:38,555 the drums were a little too loud on the intro, 133 00:05:38,599 --> 00:05:40,209 which at least covered the fact that Phil was late 134 00:05:40,252 --> 00:05:41,428 for every downbeat. 135 00:05:42,690 --> 00:05:45,693 And, Dave, you know, your chord changes were all over the place. 136 00:05:45,736 --> 00:05:47,390 You know, by the time we got to the bridge, 137 00:05:47,434 --> 00:05:49,131 I wanted to jump off one. 138 00:05:50,741 --> 00:05:54,005 I didn't know your best shot was gonna be such a nut shot. 139 00:05:54,049 --> 00:05:59,184 Look, we can go out there and sound like a bunch of bums, 140 00:05:59,228 --> 00:06:02,100 or we can blow the roof off this joint. 141 00:06:02,144 --> 00:06:04,364 Which do you want to do? 142 00:06:04,407 --> 00:06:05,756 Actually, what I want to do is 143 00:06:05,800 --> 00:06:08,368 go pick up my daughter from soccer practice. 144 00:06:08,411 --> 00:06:11,501 Nice try, Phil. If you can be late for my downbeats, 145 00:06:11,545 --> 00:06:14,156 you can be late for soccer. 146 00:06:17,202 --> 00:06:18,595 Hey, Jerry, you got a sec? 147 00:06:18,639 --> 00:06:23,861 There he is! Party Marty, my bro from another mo. 148 00:06:23,905 --> 00:06:25,907 [laughs] You know it... 149 00:06:25,950 --> 00:06:28,518 'cause you always say it. 150 00:06:28,562 --> 00:06:30,477 Come on in, have a seat. 151 00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:32,087 Actually, I want to keep this kind of quick... 152 00:06:32,130 --> 00:06:33,697 Hey, can I ask you a question? 153 00:06:33,741 --> 00:06:36,396 You're an expert when it comes to the ladies, right? 154 00:06:36,439 --> 00:06:37,745 Me? 155 00:06:39,050 --> 00:06:41,879 Of course you. With that supermodel girlfriend 156 00:06:41,923 --> 00:06:44,752 you're always telling everyone about who lives in Canada. 157 00:06:44,795 --> 00:06:46,884 What? Oh. Right. 158 00:06:46,928 --> 00:06:49,321 Katarina. [laughs] 159 00:06:49,365 --> 00:06:51,541 Yeah, you know, I-I haven't seen her in so long, 160 00:06:51,585 --> 00:06:53,935 it almost doesn't feel real. 161 00:06:53,978 --> 00:06:57,199 Well, me and my old lady got into a huge fight last night. 162 00:06:57,242 --> 00:06:59,114 Wow, Jerry. I didn't know you had a girlfriend. 163 00:06:59,157 --> 00:07:01,377 Oh, no, I don't. I meant my mom. 164 00:07:03,727 --> 00:07:06,382 She's been riding me like crazy lately. 165 00:07:06,426 --> 00:07:08,645 "Make your bed, pick up your clothes. 166 00:07:08,689 --> 00:07:11,692 When you go to the bathroom, shut the door." 167 00:07:11,735 --> 00:07:13,868 [chuckles] 168 00:07:13,911 --> 00:07:16,740 Women, right? [laughs] 169 00:07:16,784 --> 00:07:18,263 So, as I was saying... 170 00:07:18,307 --> 00:07:20,614 Tell me something. Do you and Katarina fight a lot? 171 00:07:20,657 --> 00:07:23,355 No, but that's probably because we live so far apart 172 00:07:23,399 --> 00:07:26,489 and you know, we don't have the same DNA. 173 00:07:27,534 --> 00:07:29,623 I wonder if that's the problem. 174 00:07:29,666 --> 00:07:31,973 My mom and I are around each other all the time. 175 00:07:32,016 --> 00:07:34,236 Well, in that case, maybe you should give her some space. 176 00:07:34,279 --> 00:07:37,108 You know, that's not a bad idea. 177 00:07:37,152 --> 00:07:38,806 Hey.Maybe I should ask a friend 178 00:07:38,849 --> 00:07:41,112 if I can crash on their couch for a couple of nights. 179 00:07:41,156 --> 00:07:42,853 There you go.Great! Marty, 180 00:07:42,897 --> 00:07:45,334 can I crash on your couch for a couple of nights? 181 00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:47,945 Oh. Well, I... 182 00:07:47,989 --> 00:07:50,992 [stammering]Hey, thanks, man. 183 00:07:51,035 --> 00:07:52,776 You're a real friend. 184 00:07:52,820 --> 00:07:54,561 Ha-ha! I know it, 185 00:07:54,604 --> 00:07:57,694 because, again, you always say it. 186 00:08:00,262 --> 00:08:02,482 Hey, hey.Oh, hey, Calvin. 187 00:08:02,525 --> 00:08:04,527 Uh, we need to talk. 188 00:08:04,571 --> 00:08:06,747 Look, Dave, that's what women say 189 00:08:06,790 --> 00:08:08,923 when they want to break up with you. 190 00:08:08,966 --> 00:08:11,926 If that's what this is, I support your decision. 191 00:08:11,969 --> 00:08:15,495 Nice try, Calvin, but you and I are going the distance. 192 00:08:17,192 --> 00:08:19,629 This is actually about Tina. 193 00:08:19,673 --> 00:08:21,109 What about her? 194 00:08:21,152 --> 00:08:23,198 Well, you know how much I love her. 195 00:08:23,241 --> 00:08:25,983 And she has the voice of an angel, 196 00:08:26,027 --> 00:08:29,683 which, last night, she used to make our drummer cry. 197 00:08:30,945 --> 00:08:33,077 Aah. Oh, man. 198 00:08:33,121 --> 00:08:35,471 It's the church choir all over again. 199 00:08:36,428 --> 00:08:38,822 Well, what happened with the church choir? 200 00:08:38,866 --> 00:08:43,523 Well, first, she was so hard on the choir director that he quit. 201 00:08:43,566 --> 00:08:46,134 So then, she became the choir director. 202 00:08:46,177 --> 00:08:48,005 After a week, the choir quit. 203 00:08:48,049 --> 00:08:52,488 And for the next three years, the church just played CDs. 204 00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:55,273 Man, I just had... I had no idea 205 00:08:55,317 --> 00:08:57,145 she was gonna be this hard on us. 206 00:08:57,188 --> 00:08:59,626 Look, Dave, you got to understand. 207 00:08:59,669 --> 00:09:01,845 Tina takes singing seriously. 208 00:09:01,889 --> 00:09:03,151 Music is her passion. 209 00:09:03,194 --> 00:09:06,241 It's like me with cars, or you with... 210 00:09:06,284 --> 00:09:08,243 well, me. 211 00:09:10,462 --> 00:09:12,029 What am I supposed to do? 212 00:09:12,073 --> 00:09:14,075 I can't kick her out of the band. She's my friend. 213 00:09:14,118 --> 00:09:18,688 Exactly. That's why you got to make her quit on her own. 214 00:09:18,732 --> 00:09:20,168 How am I supposed to do that? 215 00:09:20,211 --> 00:09:25,129 It's easy. You got to get Tina to think it's her idea. 216 00:09:25,173 --> 00:09:28,611 All right? Convince her that you guys are holding her back. 217 00:09:28,655 --> 00:09:32,354 I'm telling you, Dave, you don't fire Beyoncé. 218 00:09:32,397 --> 00:09:34,617 You make her want to go solo. 219 00:09:36,663 --> 00:09:40,144 Okay. All right, I'll... I'll give it a try. 220 00:09:40,188 --> 00:09:41,885 But, you know, for the record, 221 00:09:41,929 --> 00:09:43,365 I have to say, I think the way 222 00:09:43,408 --> 00:09:45,454 that she left Destiny's Child was really messed up. 223 00:09:45,497 --> 00:09:47,891 Whoa. Whoa, Dave. Dave, this... 224 00:09:47,935 --> 00:09:50,198 This is a Black neighborhood. 225 00:09:50,241 --> 00:09:52,722 You can't be talking about Queen B like that. 226 00:10:00,948 --> 00:10:02,558 [gasps] Oh, hey, Dave. 227 00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:05,430 I was just getting ready to come over for rehearsal. 228 00:10:05,474 --> 00:10:09,173 Well, actually, that's what I wanted to talk to you about. 229 00:10:09,217 --> 00:10:10,914 I canceled rehearsal. 230 00:10:10,958 --> 00:10:12,524 Hey, look, 231 00:10:12,568 --> 00:10:15,092 if this is about me breaking Brett's drumsticks, 232 00:10:15,136 --> 00:10:17,094 I said I was sorry. 233 00:10:17,138 --> 00:10:18,966 I didn't mean it, but I said it. 234 00:10:20,489 --> 00:10:24,711 No, Tina, we're the ones who should be apologizing to you. 235 00:10:24,754 --> 00:10:27,931 I mean, Brett, Phil and me-- 236 00:10:27,975 --> 00:10:30,325 we're just a bunch of amateurs making you look bad. 237 00:10:30,368 --> 00:10:33,676 I mean, the truth is, you're like Beyoncé, 238 00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:36,331 and we're just Dadditudes' Child. 239 00:10:37,680 --> 00:10:39,073 Aw, come on, Dave. 240 00:10:39,116 --> 00:10:40,770 You're being too hard on yourselves. 241 00:10:40,814 --> 00:10:42,598 We just need to keep practicing. 242 00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:43,991 Why, Tina? What's the point? 243 00:10:44,034 --> 00:10:46,080 Your voice is on another level. 244 00:10:46,123 --> 00:10:48,691 Both when you sing and when you scream at us, 245 00:10:48,735 --> 00:10:52,782 which we deserve, because we're straight trash. 246 00:10:55,089 --> 00:10:58,832 Okay, well, I will admit it has been a little frustrating. 247 00:10:58,875 --> 00:11:01,095 Ah, see? I knew it. 248 00:11:01,138 --> 00:11:02,923 Gosh, you know, 249 00:11:02,966 --> 00:11:05,403 it sounds to me like there's only one thing left to do. 250 00:11:05,447 --> 00:11:07,579 You know what, Dave? I'm afraid you're right. 251 00:11:07,623 --> 00:11:08,842 I'm so glad you feel... 252 00:11:08,885 --> 00:11:10,844 We got to fire Brett and Phil. 253 00:11:12,149 --> 00:11:13,716 Uh, wait. What? 254 00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:15,849 You said it yourself. They're amateurs. 255 00:11:15,892 --> 00:11:17,764 Getting rid of them is the only way 256 00:11:17,807 --> 00:11:20,070 that we're gonna get better. 257 00:11:21,463 --> 00:11:23,204 Oh, uh, Tina, that's crazy. 258 00:11:23,247 --> 00:11:25,946 I'm not gonna fire Brett and Phil. 259 00:11:25,989 --> 00:11:27,687 Oh, Dave, I get it. They're your friends, 260 00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:29,471 and you don't want to hurt their feelings. 261 00:11:29,514 --> 00:11:31,125 So I'll do it. 262 00:11:32,213 --> 00:11:34,476 I'm already used to making Phil cry.Okay. 263 00:11:34,519 --> 00:11:36,304 No one is firing them. 264 00:11:36,347 --> 00:11:39,002 They're not the ones who are ruining the band. You are. 265 00:11:39,046 --> 00:11:41,135 What? Are you serious? 266 00:11:41,178 --> 00:11:43,833 So you think I'm the problem with the band? 267 00:11:44,660 --> 00:11:46,618 Well, not anymore, 268 00:11:46,662 --> 00:11:48,751 because I'm kicking you out. 269 00:11:51,841 --> 00:11:54,104 You kicking me out? 270 00:11:54,888 --> 00:11:57,151 This is unbelievable. 271 00:11:57,194 --> 00:11:59,806 This is like the church choir all over again! 272 00:11:59,849 --> 00:12:02,678 Well, I don't know what to tell you, Tina. 273 00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:03,984 You brought this on your... 274 00:12:04,027 --> 00:12:05,942 You brought this on yourself. 275 00:12:06,769 --> 00:12:07,988 Oh, yeah? Well, I'll tell you 276 00:12:08,031 --> 00:12:10,077 the same thing I told Pastor Jenkins! 277 00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:12,993 You can go to hell, Dave! 278 00:12:14,603 --> 00:12:16,257 [shouts] 279 00:12:17,954 --> 00:12:19,695 Hey, Jerry, you haven't see my slippers 280 00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:21,001 lying around, have you? 281 00:12:21,044 --> 00:12:22,698 You mean the fuzzy blue ones? 282 00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:23,786 Yeah. 283 00:12:23,830 --> 00:12:25,092 Sure have. 284 00:12:25,135 --> 00:12:27,442 And boy, are they cozy. 285 00:12:29,052 --> 00:12:31,185 Seriously? You're wearing my slippers? 286 00:12:31,228 --> 00:12:33,448 Oh, you don't mind, do you? 287 00:12:33,491 --> 00:12:35,450 Mom and I share slippers all the time. 288 00:12:35,493 --> 00:12:39,889 Great. So it's kind of like her feet have been in them, too. 289 00:12:42,413 --> 00:12:44,807 Oh, good. 290 00:12:44,851 --> 00:12:46,853 Jerry is still here. 291 00:12:46,896 --> 00:12:48,115 And look at that. 292 00:12:48,158 --> 00:12:49,943 He is wearing my robe. 293 00:12:49,986 --> 00:12:52,423 I hope that's okay. 294 00:12:52,467 --> 00:12:53,860 Mine's in your washing machine. 295 00:12:53,903 --> 00:12:56,819 By the way, I might have broken your washing machine. 296 00:12:56,863 --> 00:12:59,213 Okay, that's it. It's been three days. You got to take your... 297 00:12:59,256 --> 00:13:03,652 You got to take another one of those nice long baths you love. 298 00:13:03,695 --> 00:13:06,437 After all, you've only had two today. 299 00:13:06,481 --> 00:13:08,222 Eh, don't mind if I do. 300 00:13:08,265 --> 00:13:10,790 I'm supposed to soak my foot fungus anyway. 301 00:13:14,532 --> 00:13:16,883 So, how was your day? 302 00:13:16,926 --> 00:13:19,233 Marty, I can't take this anymore. 303 00:13:19,276 --> 00:13:20,887 You need to kick this guy out by tomorrow. 304 00:13:20,930 --> 00:13:22,497 But if I kick him out, there's no way 305 00:13:22,540 --> 00:13:23,846 he's gonna give me a raise. 306 00:13:23,890 --> 00:13:25,500 JERRY: Hey, guys, a little help? 307 00:13:25,543 --> 00:13:27,807 I'm out of toilet paper in here. 308 00:13:28,677 --> 00:13:30,331 You know, his mom is right. 309 00:13:30,374 --> 00:13:32,420 He really needs to learn to close that door. 310 00:13:35,379 --> 00:13:37,381 Oh. Hey, Dave. Hey, Gemma. 311 00:13:37,425 --> 00:13:39,775 Hi, guys. Hi, Gemma. 312 00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:42,865 Hi, you off-key backstabbing guitar zero. 313 00:13:42,909 --> 00:13:45,302 Oh, well, hello to you, too, diva. 314 00:13:45,346 --> 00:13:47,565 [clears throat] I mean, Tina. 315 00:13:47,609 --> 00:13:49,785 Oh, come on! 316 00:13:49,829 --> 00:13:51,221 This is ridiculous. 317 00:13:51,265 --> 00:13:53,876 It's been two days. You guys have got to make up. 318 00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:56,400 I know, and I usually like a good fight, 319 00:13:56,444 --> 00:13:59,969 but not between people I care about and... Dave. 320 00:14:02,319 --> 00:14:05,279 Well, good luck performing at your little fundraiser. 321 00:14:05,322 --> 00:14:07,455 You're gonna need it with Brett as your singer. 322 00:14:07,498 --> 00:14:10,110 Actually, we're not playing the fundraiser. 323 00:14:10,153 --> 00:14:12,503 Someone crushed Brett's confidence so badly 324 00:14:12,547 --> 00:14:15,724 that he ran over his snare drum with his minivan. 325 00:14:15,767 --> 00:14:19,075 Well, that probably sounded better than when he played it. 326 00:14:20,250 --> 00:14:21,904 Good one. You should tell that 327 00:14:21,948 --> 00:14:24,298 to the next church choir you get kicked out of. 328 00:14:25,473 --> 00:14:27,083 Oh-ho-ho! 329 00:14:27,127 --> 00:14:29,912 You know, I don't have to stand here and listen to this! 330 00:14:29,956 --> 00:14:32,784 Neither do I! And you know what? 331 00:14:32,828 --> 00:14:34,264 You're just as mean as Beyoncé! 332 00:14:34,308 --> 00:14:37,311 [gasps]And I don't care who hears me say it! 333 00:14:40,967 --> 00:14:43,230 Okay, this is getting out of control. 334 00:14:43,273 --> 00:14:45,928 Dave has been awful to be around. 335 00:14:45,972 --> 00:14:48,278 So has Tina. She's been cranky as hell, 336 00:14:48,322 --> 00:14:51,586 stomping around, complaining about everything. 337 00:14:51,629 --> 00:14:53,370 It's like I'm married to me. 338 00:14:54,981 --> 00:14:57,244 It's so stupid. Music is supposed 339 00:14:57,287 --> 00:15:00,203 to bring people together, not tear them apart. 340 00:15:00,247 --> 00:15:02,075 Well, we better do something soon, 341 00:15:02,118 --> 00:15:03,424 because this could easily 342 00:15:03,467 --> 00:15:06,122 turn into another Ike and Tina situation. 343 00:15:06,166 --> 00:15:09,212 And that Tina will beat the hell out of Dave. 344 00:15:13,086 --> 00:15:15,131 Hey, Marty, good news. 345 00:15:15,175 --> 00:15:18,091 My mom just changed her Facebook relationship status 346 00:15:18,134 --> 00:15:19,657 to "It's Complicated." 347 00:15:19,701 --> 00:15:22,573 Check and mate. 348 00:15:24,619 --> 00:15:26,708 Sorry, Jerry. 349 00:15:26,751 --> 00:15:28,492 I can't talk right now. 350 00:15:28,536 --> 00:15:30,059 I'm too upset. 351 00:15:30,103 --> 00:15:33,584 Boy, does this sleeping bag smell like your foot cream. 352 00:15:34,411 --> 00:15:36,326 Oh. What's the matter, buddy? 353 00:15:36,370 --> 00:15:38,154 Hey, if this is about the toothbrush, 354 00:15:38,198 --> 00:15:40,678 I rinsed it off as soon as I realized it was yours. 355 00:15:42,028 --> 00:15:45,074 No. I just got a call from Katarina. 356 00:15:45,118 --> 00:15:47,424 She broke up with me, man. 357 00:15:47,468 --> 00:15:49,470 [sobbing] 358 00:15:49,513 --> 00:15:53,039 What? You're kidding.No! 359 00:15:53,082 --> 00:15:54,518 She said going so long 360 00:15:54,562 --> 00:15:57,957 without seeing each other made us drift apart. 361 00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:59,306 [sobbing] 362 00:15:59,349 --> 00:16:00,655 I never should've left her out of my sight 363 00:16:00,698 --> 00:16:04,528 for more than three, maybe four nights, tops. 364 00:16:06,139 --> 00:16:07,836 I can't believe it. 365 00:16:07,879 --> 00:16:09,446 [sobbing]: Oh, Jerry, 366 00:16:09,490 --> 00:16:11,492 you got to learn from my mistake. 367 00:16:11,535 --> 00:16:14,147 You need to go home to your mom right now, 368 00:16:14,190 --> 00:16:16,671 or you two may never share slippers again. 369 00:16:18,325 --> 00:16:21,154 Are you crazy? I can't abandon you now. 370 00:16:21,197 --> 00:16:23,547 That's not true. You absolutely can. 371 00:16:25,114 --> 00:16:27,247 No way, buddy. I'm not going anywhere. 372 00:16:27,290 --> 00:16:29,858 After all, you know what they say-- 373 00:16:29,901 --> 00:16:32,078 bros before mos. 374 00:16:32,121 --> 00:16:34,123 Okay, that's it, I give up. 375 00:16:34,167 --> 00:16:35,777 You got to go.What? 376 00:16:35,820 --> 00:16:38,606 You heard me, man. You're sloppy, you're inconsiderate, 377 00:16:38,649 --> 00:16:40,782 and you use other people's toothbrushes! 378 00:16:40,825 --> 00:16:43,872 I didn't even let Katarina do that and she ain't even real! 379 00:16:44,786 --> 00:16:47,919 Wow. I had no idea I was bothering you so much. 380 00:16:47,963 --> 00:16:49,269 Why didn't you say something? 381 00:16:49,312 --> 00:16:51,445 Because, man, I wanted a raise, 382 00:16:51,488 --> 00:16:52,576 and if I didn't let you stay here, 383 00:16:52,620 --> 00:16:54,056 I didn't think you'd give it to me. 384 00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:55,579 Well, that's ridiculous. 385 00:16:55,623 --> 00:16:57,407 You're one of the best engineers on our team. 386 00:16:57,451 --> 00:16:59,061 All you have to do is ask. 387 00:16:59,105 --> 00:17:01,629 Really? Well, in that case, can I have a raise? 388 00:17:01,672 --> 00:17:05,067 Oh, I didn't mean ask me. I have no say in that. 389 00:17:05,111 --> 00:17:08,157 What? Well, then who do I ask? 390 00:17:08,201 --> 00:17:09,941 No clue, but if you figure it out, 391 00:17:09,985 --> 00:17:11,117 would you let me know? 392 00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:12,466 I haven't had a raise in over five years. 393 00:17:12,509 --> 00:17:14,946 Why the hell do you think I live with my mom? 394 00:17:18,820 --> 00:17:21,040 [loud electric guitar feedback] 395 00:17:27,481 --> 00:17:30,701 [operatically]: ♪ Your love is like a tidal wave ♪ 396 00:17:30,745 --> 00:17:33,095 ♪ Spinning over my head 397 00:17:33,139 --> 00:17:35,880 ♪ Drowning me in your promises 398 00:17:35,924 --> 00:17:39,928 ♪ Better left unsaid... 399 00:17:39,971 --> 00:17:42,539 What are you guys doing? Knock it off! 400 00:17:42,583 --> 00:17:44,889 Yeah, you're gonna piss off the whole neighborhood! 401 00:17:44,933 --> 00:17:46,935 Exactly. And we're gonna keep doing it 402 00:17:46,978 --> 00:17:49,416 until you guys get over yourselves and make up. 403 00:17:49,459 --> 00:17:51,070 Yeah, and you better do it quick, Dave, 404 00:17:51,113 --> 00:17:52,375 'cause everybody's been talking about 405 00:17:52,419 --> 00:17:54,203 how you dissed Beyoncé.Mm-hmm. 406 00:17:56,162 --> 00:17:57,511 Well, you can play all night, 407 00:17:57,554 --> 00:17:59,600 because I've got nothing to say to him! 408 00:17:59,643 --> 00:18:01,515 Yeah, and even if she did, 409 00:18:01,558 --> 00:18:04,344 it wouldn't matter because I'm not listening to her. 410 00:18:04,387 --> 00:18:05,997 Okay, all right. 411 00:18:06,041 --> 00:18:08,304 If you two aren't gonna listen to each other, 412 00:18:08,348 --> 00:18:10,872 then I guess you're gonna have to listen to this. 413 00:18:10,915 --> 00:18:13,788 [guitar feedback]♪ Your love is like a tidal wave ♪ 414 00:18:13,831 --> 00:18:17,574 ♪ Spinning over my head... 415 00:18:17,618 --> 00:18:19,924 MAN: Shut that noise up! 416 00:18:19,968 --> 00:18:23,102 WOMAN:Yeah! Don't make me sic my dog on you! 417 00:18:23,145 --> 00:18:25,016 Okay, okay, guys, 418 00:18:25,060 --> 00:18:26,714 guys, just... just stop. 419 00:18:26,757 --> 00:18:29,543 Okay, so what's up? Are y'all gonna make up or what? 420 00:18:29,586 --> 00:18:31,153 Uh, 'cause Gemma and I-- 421 00:18:31,197 --> 00:18:33,460 we can ruin R&B, too.Oh, yeah. 422 00:18:34,896 --> 00:18:36,724 I don't know why you're mad at me. 423 00:18:36,767 --> 00:18:38,726 You're the one who kicked me out of the band. 424 00:18:38,769 --> 00:18:40,902 I didn't want to kick you out of the band, 425 00:18:40,945 --> 00:18:43,774 but with the way that you were acting, you gave me no choice. 426 00:18:43,818 --> 00:18:47,213 Don't you see, Dave? I was only trying to make us better. 427 00:18:47,256 --> 00:18:49,171 Tina, I get it, but... 428 00:18:49,215 --> 00:18:51,217 look, we're not professionals 429 00:18:51,260 --> 00:18:52,566 like you. 430 00:18:52,609 --> 00:18:54,220 We're just a bunch of dads getting together 431 00:18:54,263 --> 00:18:55,917 to make music and have fun. 432 00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:58,572 I thought we were having fun, which is... 433 00:18:58,615 --> 00:19:01,879 why it really hurt my feelings when you kicked me out. 434 00:19:03,011 --> 00:19:07,842 But I guess maybe I hurt some people's feelings, too. 435 00:19:08,930 --> 00:19:10,453 I'm sorry. 436 00:19:10,497 --> 00:19:12,238 Yeah, look, I'm sorry, too. 437 00:19:12,281 --> 00:19:13,761 I never should have tried to trick you 438 00:19:13,804 --> 00:19:15,545 into quitting on your own. 439 00:19:15,589 --> 00:19:16,894 Wait. You did what? 440 00:19:16,938 --> 00:19:19,506 I tried to tell him, but he wouldn't listen. 441 00:19:21,290 --> 00:19:24,163 So, what do you guys say? Are we done with this? 442 00:19:25,207 --> 00:19:26,382 Yeah, of course. 443 00:19:26,426 --> 00:19:27,818 Of course.CALVIN: Yeah. 444 00:19:27,862 --> 00:19:29,603 [laughing]CALVIN: That's right. 445 00:19:29,646 --> 00:19:32,214 All right! 446 00:19:32,258 --> 00:19:34,042 That's what I'm talking about. 447 00:19:34,085 --> 00:19:38,568 You two making beautiful music together, a lot like this. 448 00:19:38,612 --> 00:19:40,396 [loud guitar feedback] 449 00:19:40,440 --> 00:19:43,269 WOMAN: That's it! Go get 'em, Fluffy! 450 00:19:43,312 --> 00:19:46,707 Fluffy? Ain't nobody scared of no dog named Fluffy. 451 00:19:46,750 --> 00:19:48,143 [dog barking] 452 00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:49,449 Oh, damn. 453 00:19:49,492 --> 00:19:52,408 It's an ironic name.Run! Run! Run! [shrieks] 454 00:19:58,588 --> 00:20:00,199 Only two days till the fundraiser, 455 00:20:00,242 --> 00:20:02,113 and we're going on after the ventriloquist, 456 00:20:02,157 --> 00:20:04,855 so you know that house is gonna be rocking. 457 00:20:04,899 --> 00:20:08,076 Okay, well, let's hit it. 458 00:20:08,119 --> 00:20:10,339 And this time-- I can't believe 459 00:20:10,383 --> 00:20:14,430 I'm saying this-- with Dadditude! 460 00:20:14,474 --> 00:20:15,257 BRETT: One, two, 461 00:20:15,301 --> 00:20:16,476 three, four! 462 00:20:16,519 --> 00:20:19,653 [playing intro to "Heartbreaker"] 463 00:20:19,696 --> 00:20:22,264 ♪ Your love is like a tidal wave ♪ 464 00:20:22,308 --> 00:20:25,615 ♪ Spinning over my head 465 00:20:25,659 --> 00:20:28,357 ♪ Drowning me in your promises 466 00:20:28,401 --> 00:20:31,795 ♪ Better left unsaid... 467 00:20:31,839 --> 00:20:35,234 Okay, I take it back. Dad does look kind of cool. 468 00:20:35,277 --> 00:20:38,149 I know. It's pretty awesome being married 469 00:20:38,193 --> 00:20:40,151 to such talented badasses. 470 00:20:40,195 --> 00:20:41,718 You ain't lying. 471 00:20:41,762 --> 00:20:43,590 Tina's a lucky woman. 472 00:20:44,895 --> 00:20:48,551 ♪ You're a heartbreaker, dream maker ♪ 473 00:20:48,595 --> 00:20:51,511 ♪ Love taker, don't you mess around with me ♪ 474 00:20:51,554 --> 00:20:54,514 ♪ Heartbreaker, dream maker 475 00:20:54,557 --> 00:20:57,691 ♪ Love taker, don't you mess around, no, no, no! ♪ 33527

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