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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,177 --> 00:00:10,844 To whomever it may concern, 2 00:00:10,878 --> 00:00:13,747 if you're seeing this video, I am most likely dead. 3 00:00:17,551 --> 00:00:21,522 You've heard about the gruesome, tragic events that befell the Milton-Fletcher wedding. 4 00:00:21,555 --> 00:00:23,257 It's been all over the news. 5 00:00:23,291 --> 00:00:26,927 But what you don't know is the truth-- 6 00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:30,198 the real story, the story that my cameras captured. 7 00:00:31,732 --> 00:00:33,401 There are dangerous people out there... 8 00:00:33,434 --> 00:00:37,271 who are willing to do whatever it takes to suppress the truth. 9 00:00:37,305 --> 00:00:41,442 But my art will not be suppressed. 10 00:00:41,475 --> 00:00:45,679 Whoever you are, if this file finds its way into your possession, 11 00:00:45,713 --> 00:00:50,050 please mail a copy of it to the F.B.I. 12 00:00:50,084 --> 00:00:54,021 Mail a duplicate copy to the Sundance Film Festival. 13 00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:56,957 Okay? Make sure you attach a note. Tell 'em it's a rough cut. 14 00:00:56,990 --> 00:00:58,792 You know, still working on some things. But mostly it's all there. 15 00:00:58,826 --> 00:01:00,394 Just gotta put the title sequence in, it'll be all set. 16 00:01:02,963 --> 00:01:04,698 I've stayed too long. 17 00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:08,302 Farewell. 18 00:01:08,336 --> 00:01:10,304 I call my film Shotgun Wedding. 19 00:01:15,843 --> 00:01:17,811 Robert. Hey, buddy. 20 00:01:17,845 --> 00:01:19,780 How about a few words for the camera from the groom? 21 00:01:19,813 --> 00:01:21,249 Oh. The video. 22 00:01:21,282 --> 00:01:23,451 Right. The wedding video. We-- 23 00:01:23,484 --> 00:01:25,453 We wanted to record everything. 24 00:01:25,486 --> 00:01:28,756 We could go back and relive this special moment. 25 00:01:30,924 --> 00:01:32,926 I could never forget today. 26 00:01:36,130 --> 00:01:37,665 No matter how hard I tried. 27 00:01:39,633 --> 00:01:42,470 You-You must have something to say about your wedding. 28 00:01:42,503 --> 00:01:46,006 Robert, you okay? Robert. 29 00:01:48,776 --> 00:01:50,811 You got it? We're rolling? I got you. 30 00:01:50,844 --> 00:01:52,380 Check, check, one, two. One, two, check. Got that? 31 00:01:53,781 --> 00:01:55,149 Slated. 32 00:01:56,884 --> 00:02:00,288 So, um, what exactly are we focusing on? 33 00:02:00,321 --> 00:02:04,124 I don't-- Everything, man. Uh-- 34 00:02:04,158 --> 00:02:06,960 Family moments, problems, funny shit. 35 00:02:06,994 --> 00:02:10,030 Nip slips. Just let it run. You know what I mean? 36 00:02:10,063 --> 00:02:12,500 Just don't stop running the camera. That's all, basically. Get everything. Blaze? 37 00:02:12,533 --> 00:02:14,001 You got it. Get it all. 38 00:02:16,570 --> 00:02:18,839 * You * 39 00:02:29,850 --> 00:02:32,085 Who are you? - I had one of those going on. 40 00:02:33,821 --> 00:02:38,492 Just wanted to thank you all for being here on-- with us. 41 00:02:38,526 --> 00:02:41,862 We know that you all had to take time out of your busy, busy lives, 42 00:02:41,895 --> 00:02:46,234 and some of you had to fly across an ocean, and it really means a lot to me. 43 00:02:46,267 --> 00:02:48,336 And to me. Well, to us. 44 00:02:49,603 --> 00:02:52,573 I, uh-- Wow, man. 45 00:02:52,606 --> 00:02:54,875 The Miltons, I just-- 46 00:02:54,908 --> 00:02:57,878 A family anyone would kill to be a part of. 47 00:02:57,911 --> 00:03:01,482 I just feel so lucky to feel so outclassed. 48 00:03:01,515 --> 00:03:03,851 No. No! Oh, now. 49 00:03:03,884 --> 00:03:08,021 To those of you who witnessed my embarrassing display of skeet shooting this morning, 50 00:03:08,055 --> 00:03:09,457 I'm a much better shot than that. 51 00:03:10,891 --> 00:03:13,026 I know my dad was probably sitting there going, 52 00:03:13,060 --> 00:03:15,729 "What? Did he not learn anything in all those duck hunting trips?" 53 00:03:15,763 --> 00:03:18,566 Uh-- I blame the wedding jitters. 54 00:03:18,599 --> 00:03:21,201 - Oh. - Not that I have the wedding jitters! 55 00:03:23,271 --> 00:03:28,442 Everyone, the Honorable Judge Philip "Flip" Milton. 56 00:03:28,476 --> 00:03:31,745 Just so everyone knows, he likes to be referred to as "sir," so-- 57 00:03:31,779 --> 00:03:33,847 No, no. That's not true. 58 00:03:33,881 --> 00:03:35,749 I prefer "Your Honor." 59 00:03:38,118 --> 00:03:41,021 Okay. Well. Here's to Rosemary and Robert, huh? 60 00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:42,956 Yay. Thank you. Thank you. 61 00:03:42,990 --> 00:03:45,293 I'm Ted. I'm the best man, and-- 62 00:03:45,326 --> 00:03:46,727 Best man. Hear, hear. 63 00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:49,363 Guilty. Guilty. Guilty as charged. 64 00:03:49,397 --> 00:03:53,767 I have been best friends with Robert since high school. 65 00:03:53,801 --> 00:03:59,907 And who would have thought both of us would end up marrying such classy dames? 66 00:03:59,940 --> 00:04:02,543 Um-- Actually, my wonderful wife, Elizabeth, 67 00:04:02,576 --> 00:04:04,144 is to blame for this whole thing, 68 00:04:04,177 --> 00:04:06,246 'cause four years ago, she said to me, 69 00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:11,719 "You know, my friend Rosemary is smart and beautiful and rich. 70 00:04:11,752 --> 00:04:14,588 But she's got terrible taste in men." 71 00:04:14,622 --> 00:04:19,226 She said, "Why don't we introduce her to your friend Robert?" 72 00:04:21,629 --> 00:04:22,996 You were great, Ted. 73 00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:30,037 I was Rosemary's first... 74 00:04:32,039 --> 00:04:34,241 boyfriend. 75 00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:37,177 I don't think my poor mother has ever quite forgiven me for letting her get away. 76 00:04:37,210 --> 00:04:38,746 Ha, ha. 77 00:04:38,779 --> 00:04:40,914 So, Robert-- 78 00:04:40,948 --> 00:04:44,318 do not let her out of your sight, mate. 79 00:04:44,352 --> 00:04:48,456 I still have almost 24 hours in which to win her back. 80 00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:53,694 But seriously. 81 00:04:53,727 --> 00:04:57,331 To Rosemary... and Robert. 82 00:04:57,365 --> 00:04:59,967 Cheers! - That guy's hilarious. 83 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:01,835 I'm in the middle of my speech at the rehearsal dinner. 84 00:05:01,869 --> 00:05:04,338 Yeah! Um-- 85 00:05:04,372 --> 00:05:07,975 Robert and Rosemary, you are the perfect couple. 86 00:05:08,008 --> 00:05:11,812 And even though I haven't known either one of you that long, really, 87 00:05:11,845 --> 00:05:14,281 I just want you to know that... 88 00:05:14,314 --> 00:05:17,451 I'm so honored that you chose me to be your maid of honor. 89 00:05:18,986 --> 00:05:20,788 Hug time. Yay. 90 00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:23,123 Big hug here. Yay. 91 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:25,393 I'm so happy you're here. 92 00:05:25,426 --> 00:05:28,328 She only has 200 views. That's sad. Maybe I should subscribe to her channel. 93 00:05:28,362 --> 00:05:29,797 We love you. I love you. 94 00:05:29,830 --> 00:05:32,700 Rosemary! Ahh! 95 00:05:32,733 --> 00:05:34,868 Right? 96 00:05:36,704 --> 00:05:41,909 - My favorite cousin. - Oh. It's true. 97 00:05:41,942 --> 00:05:46,246 I am super honored you guys all believe in me enough to deejay the reception. 98 00:05:46,279 --> 00:05:48,215 He's deejaying? 99 00:05:48,248 --> 00:05:53,487 There was a time back in Afghanistan-- Oorah! 100 00:05:53,521 --> 00:05:55,989 That I thought that I would never find something... 101 00:05:56,023 --> 00:05:58,191 in the civilized world to connect to. 102 00:05:58,225 --> 00:05:59,827 Yeah, after being in the shit. 103 00:05:59,860 --> 00:06:02,029 Until I found my true calling... 104 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:06,033 as DJ Awesome-sauce, 105 00:06:06,066 --> 00:06:11,104 crankin' out dope jams for good Americans-- Oorah! 106 00:06:11,138 --> 00:06:13,173 I, uh-- 107 00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:15,743 I wondered if my only talent was killing people. 108 00:06:15,776 --> 00:06:18,278 You know? 109 00:06:18,311 --> 00:06:22,182 Every time I close my eyes, I can still smell the blood. 110 00:06:22,215 --> 00:06:23,884 I was starting to worry... 111 00:06:23,917 --> 00:06:29,056 that he was waiting too long to get married. 112 00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:31,925 Possibly because of how things went... 113 00:06:31,959 --> 00:06:35,395 with his father and me, you know. 114 00:06:35,429 --> 00:06:37,465 We're divorced. 115 00:06:37,498 --> 00:06:40,067 Messy! Messy. 116 00:06:40,100 --> 00:06:47,140 Rosemary was so beautiful and smart. 117 00:06:47,174 --> 00:06:52,212 There was no way he could fall any more in love with her... 118 00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:55,215 than I already have. 119 00:06:57,417 --> 00:07:02,222 Robbie, after you brought her home that first time, 120 00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:05,926 four years ago, 121 00:07:05,959 --> 00:07:09,897 the very next day, I baked a wedding cake. 122 00:07:09,930 --> 00:07:11,565 Yes! 123 00:07:11,599 --> 00:07:13,501 From scratch. 124 00:07:15,335 --> 00:07:18,672 And I have it here right now. 125 00:07:18,706 --> 00:07:21,208 Here we go. 126 00:07:23,477 --> 00:07:26,614 Uh, no. 127 00:07:26,647 --> 00:07:28,982 Ay, yi, yi, yi, yi. 128 00:07:29,016 --> 00:07:31,752 Nice. 129 00:07:31,785 --> 00:07:35,122 Ooh, a vet. I don't know how you keep your figure so slim. 130 00:07:35,155 --> 00:07:36,924 StairMaster. Old school. 131 00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:38,859 Anyway. You having a good time? 132 00:07:38,892 --> 00:07:40,494 Oh, man. Thank you so much. It's-- 133 00:07:40,528 --> 00:07:42,195 Of course. Of course. Look at this. 134 00:07:42,229 --> 00:07:45,298 Hey, listen. Why don't you kids go out, have a good time. Okay. 135 00:07:45,332 --> 00:07:47,768 Gonna stay here and clean up. All right. 136 00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:51,872 The first round will be on the father of the groom, Hank Fletcher. 137 00:07:51,905 --> 00:07:53,874 Oh! 138 00:07:53,907 --> 00:07:56,977 No, no. I'm just messing with you, Hank. 139 00:07:57,010 --> 00:07:58,679 No, no, no. Hank? 140 00:07:58,712 --> 00:08:01,281 First round is on me. Are you sure? 141 00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:04,685 And then you freeloaders are on your own, okay? 142 00:08:04,718 --> 00:08:07,320 Now just, uh, don't get in trouble, okay? Of course. 143 00:08:07,354 --> 00:08:09,122 We want to stay out of the papers, don't we, honey? 144 00:08:12,092 --> 00:08:14,061 Last cameraman standing. 145 00:08:14,094 --> 00:08:17,130 - What, are you going home? - All right, ladies. Here we go. 146 00:08:17,164 --> 00:08:19,232 Leave these boys to their revelry. 147 00:08:19,266 --> 00:08:21,802 I want to stay and revel too. 148 00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:24,071 Ooh! Can we do shots? 149 00:08:24,104 --> 00:08:25,839 Keep an eye on these guys for me, okay? 150 00:08:28,408 --> 00:08:30,210 To this guy. To him! 151 00:08:30,243 --> 00:08:35,515 * Raise it up, raise it up, raise it up * 152 00:08:35,549 --> 00:08:37,350 He's not that good. 153 00:08:37,384 --> 00:08:40,053 Yay! 154 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:43,356 We made it. Last stop. 155 00:08:43,390 --> 00:08:46,393 What is the damage, my friend? Sixty-five. 156 00:08:46,426 --> 00:08:49,730 Sixty-five. - Could the judge live any farther from civilization? 157 00:08:49,763 --> 00:08:51,599 Hey, guys! Hey, hey! 158 00:08:51,632 --> 00:08:54,167 Wait for me! We're down to Pensee. 159 00:08:56,604 --> 00:08:59,740 Hey, did everybody see my pearl necklace? My daddy bought it for me. 160 00:09:03,944 --> 00:09:05,412 Where are we going? 161 00:09:05,445 --> 00:09:06,880 I love you. 162 00:09:06,914 --> 00:09:08,348 They love each other. 163 00:09:09,983 --> 00:09:11,451 Stop it! 164 00:09:11,484 --> 00:09:12,552 Camera guy! 165 00:09:12,586 --> 00:09:15,022 Listen! Listen! This is where we live. 166 00:09:15,055 --> 00:09:16,456 You'll see Mika with our camera. 167 00:09:16,489 --> 00:09:18,391 She can see us. Look at this. Hello! 168 00:09:18,425 --> 00:09:20,794 Oh! Aim for the rim. Aim for the rim. 169 00:09:22,963 --> 00:09:25,432 Pretty hungry-- Hey! 170 00:09:25,465 --> 00:09:28,869 You guys ever feel like every day is, like-- 171 00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:31,371 Like every day is like trying to get... 172 00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:34,107 a fuckin' cashew in the hat. 173 00:09:36,109 --> 00:09:39,112 Vows! Vows! Vows! Vows! Vows! 174 00:09:39,146 --> 00:09:42,215 "I, Robert, take you, Rosemary, 175 00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:45,719 to be my lawfully wedded wife, 176 00:09:45,753 --> 00:09:49,589 in sickness and in health, in richness and in poorness-- 177 00:09:49,623 --> 00:09:51,992 hopefully more richness than poorness"-- 178 00:09:52,025 --> 00:09:54,261 Hey-oh! 179 00:09:54,294 --> 00:09:57,064 "Good hair days and bad hair days, 180 00:09:57,097 --> 00:09:59,099 when you're looking smoking hot... 181 00:09:59,132 --> 00:10:01,434 and on those occasions when maybe you're feeling a little bloated"-- 182 00:10:01,468 --> 00:10:04,404 Whoa! Oh, hell, no! 183 00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:06,807 I don't think you should put jokes in your vows, man. 184 00:10:06,840 --> 00:10:09,342 No, guys. Rosemary thinks I'm funny. 185 00:10:09,376 --> 00:10:11,278 She likes it when I'm funny. 186 00:10:11,311 --> 00:10:14,281 But not when you're supposed to be pledging your undying love and fidelity. 187 00:10:14,314 --> 00:10:16,449 Yeah, man. They're really terrible. 188 00:10:16,483 --> 00:10:18,318 She'll hate it, and then she'll hate you. 189 00:10:18,351 --> 00:10:20,420 You should take another pass on 'em, seriously. 190 00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:22,622 They're really immature. All right. Tomorrow. 191 00:10:22,656 --> 00:10:25,859 Tomorrow I'll fix 'em. You're already-- 192 00:10:25,893 --> 00:10:28,595 Hey, listen. You been here all night, man. You can go home if you want. 193 00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:30,197 I can go? Yeah, yeah, yeah. 194 00:10:30,230 --> 00:10:32,365 Three-way! 195 00:10:34,501 --> 00:10:35,703 Yay! 196 00:10:41,174 --> 00:10:44,244 It's okay. It's okay. 197 00:10:45,378 --> 00:10:48,949 Everything's gonna be just-- 198 00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:51,218 * Dong-dong, dong-dong, dong-dong, dong-dong * 199 00:10:51,251 --> 00:10:52,652 We're standing in puke. 200 00:10:52,686 --> 00:10:56,223 I wrote "dong" on his face. 201 00:10:56,256 --> 00:10:58,625 Room for one more! 202 00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:02,863 I'm coming. I've never felt so alive. 203 00:11:02,896 --> 00:11:06,533 Here. Two guys. Good old time. And the groomsman. 204 00:11:06,566 --> 00:11:10,003 Rosemary is so cool and hot. 205 00:11:10,037 --> 00:11:11,805 Oh, man, thanks. And rich. 206 00:11:11,839 --> 00:11:14,141 Thanks, man. Rich in tits! 207 00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:15,709 Yeah. 208 00:11:15,743 --> 00:11:18,979 Protect the home base. This is our land! 209 00:11:21,348 --> 00:11:24,217 I was on fire today. Never even shot a gun before. 210 00:11:24,251 --> 00:11:26,186 That's beginner's luck. 211 00:11:26,219 --> 00:11:29,422 Your best score tied my worst score. What? 212 00:11:29,456 --> 00:11:32,592 Oh, yeah? Pull. 213 00:11:32,625 --> 00:11:34,227 Nailed it again. 214 00:11:34,261 --> 00:11:35,896 Can't miss. 215 00:11:35,929 --> 00:11:38,031 Wait. What are you guys talking about? Skeet shooting. 216 00:11:38,065 --> 00:11:42,069 What? Let's shoot skeet now. 217 00:11:42,102 --> 00:11:44,204 Pensee, it's the middle of the night. We can't-- I'm the groom. 218 00:11:44,237 --> 00:11:46,706 We can do what we want. 219 00:11:46,740 --> 00:11:49,109 Whoa! 220 00:11:49,142 --> 00:11:50,510 Come on! 221 00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:52,712 It's time to go and shoot something. 222 00:11:52,746 --> 00:11:54,181 I don't know what it is. 223 00:11:54,214 --> 00:11:55,348 Love murder! 224 00:11:55,382 --> 00:11:58,085 Okay. Yeah. 225 00:11:58,118 --> 00:11:59,787 Shh, shh, shh. Shh! 226 00:11:59,820 --> 00:12:01,521 It's like a-- Pensee, quiet. 227 00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:04,124 I didn't say anything! Pensee, quiet. 228 00:12:04,157 --> 00:12:07,194 You be quiet! You're talking. 229 00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:10,197 I wasn't. Okay. No more talking. 230 00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:11,932 You wanna hold it? 231 00:12:11,965 --> 00:12:13,400 Yeah, I do. Touch it. 232 00:12:13,433 --> 00:12:16,269 What was that? You want me to shoot you? 233 00:12:16,303 --> 00:12:18,806 Follow me. 234 00:12:18,839 --> 00:12:21,741 All right. You ready? Yeah, I'm ready. 235 00:12:21,775 --> 00:12:23,210 Are you ready-ready? I'm ready. 236 00:12:23,243 --> 00:12:24,711 You ready-ready-ready? Are you ready? 237 00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:26,780 I'm ready. Okay. 238 00:12:26,814 --> 00:12:28,782 Okay. Pull! 239 00:12:30,117 --> 00:12:31,985 Oh! Slam! 240 00:12:33,821 --> 00:12:37,057 They didn't invite me to this? Fuckin' assholes, man. 241 00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:38,758 You did. I did. 242 00:12:38,792 --> 00:12:40,727 Well, that's why I think it's too easy. 243 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:42,429 I need something harder. 244 00:12:42,462 --> 00:12:44,764 Take three paces, turn around and then try to shoot it. 245 00:12:44,798 --> 00:12:46,499 Three paces, turn around-- Turn around. 246 00:12:46,533 --> 00:12:48,235 Fire. No looking. No look-sees. 247 00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:51,905 Hello, lovelies. You are about to see me shoot a gun. 248 00:12:51,939 --> 00:12:54,174 For the very first time. Ever. Okay. Pull it. 249 00:12:54,207 --> 00:12:55,475 Ever! Robert, no! 250 00:12:56,810 --> 00:12:59,179 Oh, shit! Oh, no! Fuck! 251 00:12:59,212 --> 00:13:01,614 Pensee? Pensee? Fuck! 252 00:13:01,648 --> 00:13:04,617 Are you okay? I think something hit me in the face. 253 00:13:04,651 --> 00:13:07,154 What do we do? Do we move her? Call someone? Call the police? 254 00:13:07,187 --> 00:13:09,356 Oh, my God. Who do you call when you shoot someone in the face? 255 00:13:09,389 --> 00:13:11,091 Someone's been shot. Oh. 256 00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:12,860 We need to call a paramedic, right? Don't touch your face. 257 00:13:12,893 --> 00:13:14,427 Yes, I'll do it. 258 00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:17,464 Oh, boy. We need help. 911. 259 00:13:17,497 --> 00:13:20,667 We need help. Someone's been shot. 260 00:13:20,700 --> 00:13:24,337 It's gonna take too long. Listen. My mom-- Side room right over there, okay? 261 00:13:24,371 --> 00:13:26,106 She's a nurse. She's a school nurse, dude! 262 00:13:26,139 --> 00:13:28,876 She's still a nurse, Ted! I'm so sleepy. 263 00:13:28,909 --> 00:13:30,510 Pensee! Get up! 264 00:13:30,543 --> 00:13:33,146 Look at this weirdy. Look at this weirdo. Do not fall asleep. 265 00:13:33,180 --> 00:13:35,615 There she is. 266 00:13:37,851 --> 00:13:41,989 I did it. Guys, where am I? 267 00:13:44,524 --> 00:13:48,862 What kind of ding-a-lings shoot guns in the middle of the night? You're getting married tomorrow. 268 00:13:48,896 --> 00:13:51,131 Mom, she just got shot in the face. You can yell at me later. 269 00:13:51,164 --> 00:13:53,400 What do you think, Mom? We should call 911. Right, Mom? 270 00:13:53,433 --> 00:13:55,835 Uh-- No, no, no. 271 00:13:55,869 --> 00:14:00,040 Now hold on. I think she's probably okay. Yeah? 272 00:14:00,073 --> 00:14:02,976 This is mostly swelling. Oh. 273 00:14:03,010 --> 00:14:06,246 Yeah. We just need to clean her up and she'll be right as rain. 274 00:14:06,279 --> 00:14:08,348 I still get to be maid of honor, right? 275 00:14:08,381 --> 00:14:11,818 I was totally looking forward to it, and Rosemary chose me. Oh. Oh-- 276 00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:13,153 Let's take her to the emergency room. 277 00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:14,888 Come on. Let's go to the emergency room. 278 00:14:14,922 --> 00:14:17,590 You listen to me, Robert Allen Fletcher. 279 00:14:18,959 --> 00:14:22,762 I-- I do understand what is happening here. 280 00:14:22,795 --> 00:14:26,533 I will not allow my baby's wedding to get derailed... 281 00:14:26,566 --> 00:14:30,003 by a-- by a... simple accident. 282 00:14:30,037 --> 00:14:33,106 Do you think that Judge Milton will want to pay for a second wedding... 283 00:14:33,140 --> 00:14:39,079 because you shot his daughter's adorable maid of honor in the face? 284 00:14:39,112 --> 00:14:40,713 This is not important, is it? 285 00:14:40,747 --> 00:14:43,050 I mean, this is just some big fancy wedding. 286 00:14:43,083 --> 00:14:45,385 This is Pensee's life. We can-- 287 00:14:45,418 --> 00:14:46,853 Rosemary and I, we can go to Vegas. 288 00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:48,788 We can marry in Vegas. It doesn't matter. 289 00:14:48,821 --> 00:14:53,426 I was in labor for 32 hours with you. 290 00:14:53,460 --> 00:14:55,428 Thirty-two hours. 291 00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:58,298 With no drugs. 292 00:14:58,331 --> 00:15:00,533 And I wanted the drugs! 293 00:15:00,567 --> 00:15:02,970 But I said no, for you. 294 00:15:03,003 --> 00:15:05,638 I did not go through that so you could have a wedding... 295 00:15:06,940 --> 00:15:11,911 performed by some Elvis or some ordained drag queen. 296 00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:15,482 What if Rosemary isn't okay with that? 297 00:15:15,515 --> 00:15:17,450 What if she changes her mind? 298 00:15:17,484 --> 00:15:19,219 Yvette's right. Yvette's right. 299 00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:23,156 This is more important. This is the turning point of your entire life. 300 00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:32,599 What the fuck is wrong with you two? 301 00:15:32,632 --> 00:15:36,436 Pensee, dear. You understand, right? 302 00:15:36,469 --> 00:15:42,109 You don't want to be the reason that the whole wedding gets called off. 303 00:15:42,142 --> 00:15:43,276 Oh, my gosh. Do you? 304 00:15:43,310 --> 00:15:46,013 No! No! I really don't. 305 00:15:46,046 --> 00:15:50,417 I'm so sorry my face got in front of your bullets, Robert. 306 00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:52,185 Those guns don't shoot bullets. It's a bird shot. 307 00:15:52,219 --> 00:15:54,421 ...stupid! This is not your fault. You are not stupid. 308 00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:56,756 Shut up, Robert. 309 00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:58,958 This is Pensee's decision, not yours. 310 00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:01,594 And she's on my side. 311 00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:03,363 Ted, get him out of here. 312 00:16:03,396 --> 00:16:05,265 Brother. Bye. 313 00:16:05,298 --> 00:16:09,202 I gotta clean her up and I gotta get her back to her room. 314 00:16:09,236 --> 00:16:10,937 Okay. 315 00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,972 We're gonna be brave. 316 00:16:13,006 --> 00:16:14,641 Pensee, have you been filming this? 317 00:16:19,679 --> 00:16:22,082 What in the hell is this? 318 00:16:29,089 --> 00:16:32,992 Anyone single, in my opinion, is a slut. 319 00:16:33,026 --> 00:16:35,062 I want you to look into this. Ready? 320 00:16:35,095 --> 00:16:38,698 A dick on your face. He doesn't even-- 321 00:16:40,533 --> 00:16:43,203 Excuse me. Yes? 322 00:16:43,236 --> 00:16:45,905 I hate this continental breakfast junk. 323 00:16:45,938 --> 00:16:49,042 Do you think you could get me a couple fried eggs, a little ham steak? 324 00:16:49,076 --> 00:16:51,744 Hey, man. Ted, right? Yeah. 325 00:16:51,778 --> 00:16:54,681 Yeah. Uh, I saw everything last night. Oh. 326 00:16:54,714 --> 00:16:59,852 Yeah. And by "saw everything," I mean I got it all on tape. 327 00:16:59,886 --> 00:17:03,190 And if I'm not being too presumptuous, Flip, Barbara, 328 00:17:03,223 --> 00:17:05,892 I still consider you both to be family. 329 00:17:05,925 --> 00:17:08,328 Oh. 330 00:17:08,361 --> 00:17:11,364 You know, the groom's target mishap. 331 00:17:11,398 --> 00:17:14,867 Yeah. The chat with his mom. All on tape. 332 00:17:14,901 --> 00:17:16,903 Pensee? She's either drunk or hungover. 333 00:17:16,936 --> 00:17:18,538 Even Ted didn't come home till dawn. 334 00:17:18,571 --> 00:17:20,073 Whoa. Ooh! 335 00:17:20,107 --> 00:17:22,909 Yeah. And I was just about to upload it to YouTube. 336 00:17:22,942 --> 00:17:25,378 The only man who could stop me is old Benjamin Franklin. 337 00:17:25,412 --> 00:17:27,280 Okay, okay. 338 00:17:27,314 --> 00:17:29,949 But you can't say anything till after the wedding, okay? 339 00:17:29,982 --> 00:17:32,919 If I give you money, that's like a legal contract. 340 00:17:32,952 --> 00:17:34,887 ...for longer than this guy. She's a slut. 341 00:17:34,921 --> 00:17:38,057 Yay! 342 00:17:38,091 --> 00:17:40,627 Much appreciated. You took it. It's legal. 343 00:17:43,296 --> 00:17:45,298 - Robert. Robert! - Look who's finally decided to join us. 344 00:17:45,332 --> 00:17:47,700 Thank you. Hey. 345 00:17:47,734 --> 00:17:50,237 Happy couple alert. Love it! 346 00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:51,971 Can I get you some breakfast? 347 00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:56,209 No, no. I'm... full. I'm not hungry. 348 00:17:56,243 --> 00:17:57,977 Couldn't eat today, to be honest. 349 00:17:58,010 --> 00:18:00,913 Too nervous? 350 00:18:00,947 --> 00:18:03,316 Hey, Robert, do you mind if I get you hooked up with a microphone? 351 00:18:03,350 --> 00:18:05,385 Oh. It's Steve, right? Yeah, Steve. 352 00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:07,086 Yeah, sure. I-- 353 00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:08,988 You know, microphone-- Do I really-- 354 00:18:09,021 --> 00:18:10,457 Who wants to hear me today, you know? 355 00:18:12,192 --> 00:18:13,926 The battery should last all day, all right? 356 00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:15,995 So just forget you're even wearing it, man. 357 00:18:16,028 --> 00:18:18,465 Have fun out there. Just leave all the shooting to us. 358 00:18:18,498 --> 00:18:21,401 All right. Got all my principals miked. 359 00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:24,070 My boys Blaze and Sully and I will be shooting all day, 360 00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:28,608 and in two months, you will have a feature film of your magical day. 361 00:18:28,641 --> 00:18:30,243 Two months? 362 00:18:30,277 --> 00:18:33,780 Incidentally, I am an award-winning documentarian. 363 00:18:33,813 --> 00:18:37,484 Took home the jury prize at the Bakersfield International Student Film Festival. 364 00:18:37,517 --> 00:18:38,951 No big whoop. 365 00:18:38,985 --> 00:18:41,621 Big whoop! So-- It's gonna be great. 366 00:18:43,690 --> 00:18:46,426 Robert, honey. Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom. 367 00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:47,827 Okay. So Pensee is-- Hey. Okay. 368 00:18:47,860 --> 00:18:51,464 No, no. Listen. We are miked right now. 369 00:18:51,498 --> 00:18:55,335 I'm wearing a microphone, and these cameras are shooting us, 370 00:18:55,368 --> 00:18:58,471 so they will hear everything you will say. 371 00:18:58,505 --> 00:19:00,707 So, what, uh-- 372 00:19:00,740 --> 00:19:03,210 What was going on with Pensee? 373 00:19:03,243 --> 00:19:05,945 How's-- How's the damage to her car? 374 00:19:05,978 --> 00:19:08,114 Car? Mm-hmm. 375 00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:12,652 Well, um-- It's a little... dinged? Uh-huh? 376 00:19:12,685 --> 00:19:18,157 But I-I got it's, um, face bandaged-- 377 00:19:18,191 --> 00:19:21,461 Yeah? As long as sh-- it doesn't pick at it, 378 00:19:21,494 --> 00:19:22,895 it should be fine. 379 00:19:22,929 --> 00:19:27,099 Maybe we should take her car to the shop. 380 00:19:28,401 --> 00:19:31,070 Now? Yes. 381 00:19:31,103 --> 00:19:33,740 We've got wedding photos coming up. Really? 382 00:19:33,773 --> 00:19:37,009 Rosemary! 383 00:19:37,043 --> 00:19:40,146 My goodness, I am so excited! Oh, good. 384 00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:44,551 You look so perfect, like a little Hummel figurine. 385 00:19:44,584 --> 00:19:46,853 I just want to steal my fiancé for a moment, if that's okay. 386 00:19:46,886 --> 00:19:50,189 - Yeah. - Ma'am, may I hook thee up with a microphone? 387 00:19:50,223 --> 00:19:51,924 You know what? She doesn't need to be miked. Yes. 388 00:19:51,958 --> 00:19:53,893 Of course. No, no, no, no, no. 389 00:19:53,926 --> 00:19:56,496 Of course you get to be miked. Everyone gets to be in the movie. 390 00:19:56,529 --> 00:20:00,066 - You just want all the attention on yourself. - You know me. 391 00:20:00,099 --> 00:20:02,201 I'm gonna go mike your mom up, dude. 392 00:20:02,235 --> 00:20:04,504 Hey. I wanna talk to you for a second. Hey. 393 00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:07,840 Okay. I know what you did last night. 394 00:20:07,874 --> 00:20:10,410 Staying up all night the night before the wedding? 395 00:20:10,443 --> 00:20:12,579 Oh, boy, you know. 396 00:20:12,612 --> 00:20:14,347 That's such a terrible idea. I really shouldn't. 397 00:20:14,381 --> 00:20:17,083 Come on. I'm just kidding, babe. Okay. 398 00:20:17,116 --> 00:20:19,185 I'm glad you had fun with your friends. Yeah. 399 00:20:19,218 --> 00:20:23,690 I do want to know, however, where is my maid of honor? 400 00:20:23,723 --> 00:20:25,558 Pensee? Pensee. 401 00:20:25,592 --> 00:20:27,627 The maid of honor really should be here at this special brunch. 402 00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:29,429 Yeah. Where-- 403 00:20:29,462 --> 00:20:32,231 She just-- She just had a little bit too much to drink. 404 00:20:32,265 --> 00:20:34,267 Uh-huh. She's still in her room. 405 00:20:34,301 --> 00:20:36,436 She's hungover. 406 00:20:36,469 --> 00:20:41,541 How irresponsible is that? Hmm? You guys are really lucky that I'm here to cover for her. 407 00:20:41,574 --> 00:20:43,610 Yeah. I'm gonna go check on her. 408 00:20:43,643 --> 00:20:44,777 Yeah? Yeah. 409 00:20:44,811 --> 00:20:46,546 Wait, wait, wait. W-W-W-Wait. 410 00:20:46,579 --> 00:20:48,147 I will come with you. Yeah. 411 00:20:48,180 --> 00:20:50,450 Oh. Are you-- Okay. Yeah. 412 00:20:50,483 --> 00:20:51,418 Yeah? Oh, yeah. 413 00:20:51,451 --> 00:20:52,719 Yeah? Yeah! 414 00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:53,953 Okay. 415 00:20:54,854 --> 00:20:55,922 Okay. 416 00:20:55,955 --> 00:20:58,858 Hey. So, uh, did you take care of it? 417 00:20:59,459 --> 00:21:02,261 What? The-- 418 00:21:02,295 --> 00:21:05,898 - Your vows. - Oh, shit. Shit. I gotta-- 419 00:21:05,932 --> 00:21:07,467 Okay. Okay. 420 00:21:07,500 --> 00:21:09,469 I gotta get on that. 421 00:21:09,502 --> 00:21:11,338 Gone again? 422 00:21:11,371 --> 00:21:12,939 Man stuff. 423 00:21:12,972 --> 00:21:14,907 Oh, wait. You know, uh-- 424 00:21:14,941 --> 00:21:18,778 ...is sick. It was coming out both ends. 425 00:21:18,811 --> 00:21:23,583 And her Aunt Flo is in town, so-- all three ends. 426 00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:26,453 Pen-- Pensee. It's Rosemary. 427 00:21:26,486 --> 00:21:28,521 Are you sick, babe? 428 00:21:28,555 --> 00:21:32,258 Oh, Rosemary. Oh, my God. I think that maybe I-- 429 00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:34,026 Yvette. I'm out here too. 430 00:21:34,060 --> 00:21:36,863 Hi, Yvette. Hi. 431 00:21:36,896 --> 00:21:38,931 Let me come in-- No, no, no, no, no. 432 00:21:38,965 --> 00:21:41,501 You don't need anything, do you? 433 00:21:41,534 --> 00:21:44,871 - You'll be better in time for the photos, right? - Uh-- 434 00:21:44,904 --> 00:21:48,174 Pensee? You just stay in there like a good girl. 435 00:21:48,207 --> 00:21:51,778 You drink lots of water. You do not let anyone in the room. 436 00:21:51,811 --> 00:21:54,847 You don't want anyone to see the way your-- 437 00:21:56,015 --> 00:21:58,117 uh, your condition is looking. 438 00:21:58,150 --> 00:21:59,686 Okay? 439 00:22:00,653 --> 00:22:01,888 Okay. 440 00:22:01,921 --> 00:22:04,991 Love you, dear. Okay. 441 00:22:05,024 --> 00:22:07,293 Okay. Yeah. You're fine. 442 00:22:07,326 --> 00:22:08,661 Don't worry about her. She is going to be fine. 443 00:22:10,062 --> 00:22:13,232 Hey, everyone out there in Pensee land. 444 00:22:13,265 --> 00:22:16,369 Like a goof, I got hurt at the wedding weekend. 445 00:22:16,403 --> 00:22:19,639 I don't want to make a scene or do anything stupid, so, 446 00:22:19,672 --> 00:22:22,875 I'm gonna sneak out the window and run through the woods to the highway... 447 00:22:22,909 --> 00:22:24,977 and then take a taxi to the hospital. 448 00:22:25,011 --> 00:22:27,580 And I'm bringing you all along with me, guys. 449 00:22:27,614 --> 00:22:29,315 Wish me luck! 450 00:22:31,250 --> 00:22:34,353 You know. It's, uh-- 451 00:22:34,387 --> 00:22:37,924 Everything happens for a reason, even accidents. 452 00:22:37,957 --> 00:22:40,493 There's a thing called happy accidents, you know? 453 00:22:40,527 --> 00:22:44,864 It's possible all life on Earth began by accident. 454 00:23:01,981 --> 00:23:03,115 Pensee? 455 00:23:04,417 --> 00:23:05,151 Pensee? 456 00:23:07,319 --> 00:23:09,121 This is harder than I expected. 457 00:23:10,389 --> 00:23:12,358 Oh. Uh-- 458 00:23:12,391 --> 00:23:14,326 Ow. 459 00:23:16,162 --> 00:23:17,396 Oh, God. 460 00:23:20,767 --> 00:23:21,968 Okay. 461 00:23:22,001 --> 00:23:24,070 But I'm sticking to it, guys. 462 00:23:24,103 --> 00:23:27,574 You gotta believe in yourself and find your greatness, right? 463 00:23:27,607 --> 00:23:30,577 Pensee? Pensee! 464 00:23:30,610 --> 00:23:32,211 What on earth are you doing? 465 00:23:32,244 --> 00:23:34,146 Don't worry. No one will see. 466 00:23:34,180 --> 00:23:36,082 It's broad daylight! 467 00:23:36,115 --> 00:23:39,619 You come back in here right now, young lady. You will ruin everything! 468 00:23:39,652 --> 00:23:41,087 Come in. No, no. 469 00:23:41,120 --> 00:23:43,322 You come in right now. Don't pull on it. Don't you dare. 470 00:23:43,355 --> 00:23:45,424 Come in! You're the devil and you know it! 471 00:23:45,458 --> 00:23:47,426 It's my wedding, and you won't ruin it! 472 00:23:47,460 --> 00:23:49,829 It's not your wedding. It's Robert and Rosemary's wedding. 473 00:23:49,862 --> 00:23:51,898 Fine! But you're ruining it! 474 00:23:51,931 --> 00:23:54,100 Stop! You're gonna make me fall! 475 00:23:58,471 --> 00:23:59,839 Pensee? 476 00:23:59,872 --> 00:24:01,974 Oh. You don't want to go in there. 477 00:24:02,008 --> 00:24:03,142 I have to get some Pepto. 478 00:24:14,654 --> 00:24:16,723 Ted! Ted! 479 00:24:19,325 --> 00:24:20,760 Could you come with me for a moment, please? 480 00:24:20,793 --> 00:24:22,629 Can you just let me eat this Danish, please? 481 00:24:24,463 --> 00:24:26,933 This is an emergency. Mm-hmm. 482 00:24:26,966 --> 00:24:30,136 It's about Pensee's, uh-- 483 00:24:30,169 --> 00:24:31,270 diarrhea. Oh. 484 00:24:31,303 --> 00:24:33,640 It's gotten very messy. Okay, okay, okay. 485 00:24:33,673 --> 00:24:35,575 Okay, okay. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. 486 00:24:40,312 --> 00:24:42,181 Hurry up. 487 00:24:42,214 --> 00:24:43,816 Oh, my God! 488 00:24:43,850 --> 00:24:45,484 Oh, man up, Ted! 489 00:24:50,389 --> 00:24:52,458 Oh. Mmm. Breathe in, breathe out. 490 00:24:52,491 --> 00:24:54,160 I'll get you a paper bag in a second. 491 00:24:54,193 --> 00:24:55,895 The one thing I didn't understand... 492 00:24:55,928 --> 00:24:59,165 is that you're at a wedding this weekend-- Babe. Babe. Stop talking. 493 00:24:59,198 --> 00:25:02,068 Stop. Listen to what I am saying, okay? 494 00:25:02,101 --> 00:25:04,336 I got this fuckin' thing on my lip. 495 00:25:04,370 --> 00:25:06,238 I don't know what it is. 496 00:25:06,272 --> 00:25:09,175 Go to the computer, fire up WebMed. 497 00:25:09,208 --> 00:25:12,311 Just-- I'm gonna shoot the thing on my lip... 498 00:25:12,344 --> 00:25:14,581 and I'm gonna play it back so I can describe it to you. 499 00:25:14,614 --> 00:25:17,516 I don't know what it is, and that affects both of us. 500 00:25:17,550 --> 00:25:20,587 Yeah. Yeah. That's the point, retard. Thank you. 501 00:25:20,620 --> 00:25:22,488 I don't care about this thing on your lip. I'm trying-- 502 00:25:22,521 --> 00:25:24,657 Fucking ridiculous. 503 00:25:24,691 --> 00:25:26,358 Should we call a doctor? 504 00:25:26,392 --> 00:25:27,827 She's dead. She can't get any deader. 505 00:25:27,860 --> 00:25:29,528 Should we bury her? 506 00:25:29,562 --> 00:25:31,698 There's no time for that, Ted. 507 00:25:31,731 --> 00:25:35,101 Besides, Pensee would have wanted us to just hide her corpse. 508 00:25:35,134 --> 00:25:37,937 What about that? Ooh, that's good thinking. 509 00:25:47,113 --> 00:25:49,081 Okay. Okay. 510 00:25:49,115 --> 00:25:51,017 Oh, my God. That is fucked up. 511 00:25:55,054 --> 00:25:58,557 Get her arm-- Hold on. 512 00:25:58,591 --> 00:26:00,359 Here. Hold on. Do you have any lotion? 513 00:26:00,392 --> 00:26:02,061 Maybe we could, like, grease her up. 514 00:26:02,094 --> 00:26:04,563 We'll just cram it down with the lid. Just cram the lid down. 515 00:26:04,597 --> 00:26:06,032 I don't-- Oh. 516 00:26:06,065 --> 00:26:08,300 Are they-- Oh, sh-- Is that the cameraman? 517 00:26:08,334 --> 00:26:11,103 Um, excuse me. 518 00:26:11,137 --> 00:26:15,541 Mr. Cameraman? This isn't what-- 519 00:26:15,574 --> 00:26:17,409 Could we talk to you for a second? 520 00:26:17,443 --> 00:26:19,445 - Grab that rock! - This rock right here? 521 00:26:19,478 --> 00:26:21,213 What the fuck are you doing? No, that rock! 522 00:26:21,247 --> 00:26:22,649 Dude, I'm just high. I just imagined-- 523 00:26:22,682 --> 00:26:24,550 What-- What are you doing? You fucking-- 524 00:26:24,583 --> 00:26:25,985 Don't run from me. Stop it! 525 00:26:26,018 --> 00:26:27,654 Come on, man! I'll give you back the money, dude! 526 00:26:27,687 --> 00:26:30,790 Get his head. 527 00:26:30,823 --> 00:26:31,991 No. Oh, shit! 528 00:26:34,526 --> 00:26:36,462 I think I killed him. I had to, right? 529 00:26:36,495 --> 00:26:38,965 He could have had a gun. You think he may have a gun, right? 530 00:26:38,998 --> 00:26:43,435 He could have had a-- Right? Y-Yes. Well, always best to play it safe. 531 00:26:43,469 --> 00:26:46,472 How am I gonna tell my wife she married someone... 532 00:26:46,505 --> 00:26:49,175 who hit someone in the head with a rock and then he died? Ted. 533 00:26:49,208 --> 00:26:51,510 What? You're not going to tell your wife. 534 00:26:51,543 --> 00:26:53,980 I tell her everything. She knows everything. It's why she doesn't like me. 535 00:26:55,882 --> 00:27:00,086 Here you are. I was starting to think you were ignoring me. 536 00:27:00,119 --> 00:27:02,254 What? No, honey. 537 00:27:02,288 --> 00:27:04,490 I'm just-- I was distracted. 538 00:27:04,523 --> 00:27:07,459 My dad's been looking for you. He said you guys were supposed to have a man-to-man talk. 539 00:27:07,493 --> 00:27:09,128 Yeah. Yeah. You said you were into it. 540 00:27:09,161 --> 00:27:10,697 Yeah, I gotta go see him. 541 00:27:11,964 --> 00:27:13,365 You all right, baby? Yeah. Excuse me. 542 00:27:13,399 --> 00:27:15,702 I gotta talk to my mom real fast. 543 00:27:15,735 --> 00:27:17,136 See you at the wedding photos! 544 00:27:19,338 --> 00:27:21,540 Mom? Mom. Mom, Mom, Mom. 545 00:27:21,573 --> 00:27:23,710 I'm in the middle of something. I can see that, Mom. 546 00:27:23,743 --> 00:27:26,378 Why do you have an ax? 547 00:27:26,412 --> 00:27:28,280 I got it off one of the gardeners. 548 00:27:28,314 --> 00:27:30,649 Rodrigo has everything. Oh, yeah? 549 00:27:30,683 --> 00:27:32,885 That doesn't really answer my question, Mom. 550 00:27:32,919 --> 00:27:38,024 This doesn't have anything to do with Pensee's, uh, car trouble? 551 00:27:38,057 --> 00:27:39,491 Um, y-- 552 00:27:39,525 --> 00:27:40,893 It died. 553 00:27:43,730 --> 00:27:47,499 Huh? She-- Pensee's car died. 554 00:27:47,533 --> 00:27:52,038 You said-- You said she was-- it was fine, Mom. 555 00:27:52,071 --> 00:27:54,573 Uh, it was. 556 00:27:54,606 --> 00:27:58,310 Then it fell out a window and died. 557 00:27:58,344 --> 00:28:03,015 Then one of the cameramen-- Mm-hmm? 558 00:28:03,049 --> 00:28:05,017 His car died too. 559 00:28:05,051 --> 00:28:06,685 What are you talking about, Mom? 560 00:28:06,719 --> 00:28:09,088 His car-- Yeah? 561 00:28:09,121 --> 00:28:11,690 Saw Pensee's car-- Uh-huh. 562 00:28:11,724 --> 00:28:16,328 Then wanted to ruin the wedding, so Ted... 563 00:28:16,362 --> 00:28:18,731 hit it with a rock. 564 00:28:18,765 --> 00:28:22,034 Oh, Robert. There you are, my boy. Oh, hey! 565 00:28:22,068 --> 00:28:25,704 Uh-- Don't worry. Your mother is looking out for you. 566 00:28:25,738 --> 00:28:28,107 You just keep enjoying yourself. Okay. 567 00:28:28,140 --> 00:28:31,043 Where are the cars now, Ma? 568 00:28:31,077 --> 00:28:32,678 Everything okay? Yeah. 569 00:28:32,711 --> 00:28:35,714 No, Judge-- Your Honor. Sir. Everything's great. 570 00:28:35,748 --> 00:28:40,052 I think it's high time that you learned to call me Flip. 571 00:28:40,086 --> 00:28:42,554 - Ah. Yes, sir, Flip. - Whoa. 572 00:28:42,588 --> 00:28:46,759 We are pleased as punch to welcome you into the Milton family. 573 00:28:46,793 --> 00:28:50,396 Well, I am honored to be a part of your family, sir. 574 00:28:50,429 --> 00:28:53,732 You know what? Can I just talk to my dad for one minute, while we're here? 575 00:28:53,766 --> 00:28:55,567 Excuse me real quick. Hey, Dad? 576 00:28:55,601 --> 00:28:57,804 Mom's, uh-- I need you to watch out for her, okay? 577 00:28:57,837 --> 00:28:59,471 'Cause she's getting a little crazy with her wedding planning. 578 00:28:59,505 --> 00:29:03,375 Robbie. She's always been crazy. 579 00:29:03,409 --> 00:29:05,477 I know that you guys aren't on good terms right now, okay? 580 00:29:05,511 --> 00:29:07,279 But I really need you right now. 581 00:29:07,313 --> 00:29:09,548 Make sure she doesn't do anything out of the ordinary, okay? 582 00:29:09,581 --> 00:29:12,418 Yeah. If that's what you need me to do. Okay. That's what I need. 583 00:29:12,451 --> 00:29:15,087 Uh, Robert? Come on in. Yeah. Here I come! 584 00:29:15,121 --> 00:29:18,057 - Here I come, Pop! - Do you know what they're having for dinner? 585 00:29:18,090 --> 00:29:20,960 It's kind of weird, isn't it, having all these cameras around here? 586 00:29:20,993 --> 00:29:23,229 I have an election coming up in November, Robert. 587 00:29:23,262 --> 00:29:26,398 Charles Beaumont is really gunning for my seat, 588 00:29:26,432 --> 00:29:27,533 just waiting for me to slip up. 589 00:29:39,378 --> 00:29:42,414 Okeydokey. Uh, excuse me. 590 00:29:42,448 --> 00:29:44,783 Ted? 591 00:29:44,817 --> 00:29:47,419 I got an ax. No! I don't want to cut him up! 592 00:29:47,453 --> 00:29:49,755 The key, I find, 593 00:29:49,788 --> 00:29:52,191 is one must live one's life in private... 594 00:29:52,224 --> 00:29:57,029 just as honorably and forthrightly as one does in public. 595 00:29:57,063 --> 00:29:58,497 That makes sense. 596 00:29:58,530 --> 00:30:01,467 Since I do have an election coming up-- 597 00:30:01,500 --> 00:30:02,634 Anything you need to tell me, Robert? 598 00:30:04,036 --> 00:30:06,005 Any skeletons in the closet? 599 00:30:07,673 --> 00:30:08,640 Your closet? 600 00:30:10,877 --> 00:30:15,281 No. This is man's work, and this body's too big to carry around. 601 00:30:15,314 --> 00:30:18,517 Look, we have to make it look like a Mexican drug cartel did it. 602 00:30:18,550 --> 00:30:20,019 Isn't that smart? Come on. 603 00:30:20,052 --> 00:30:22,354 What was that? Do you hear something? 604 00:30:22,388 --> 00:30:25,892 No. You're just being paranoid. Come on. Take the ax. No. Shh. 605 00:30:28,827 --> 00:30:30,529 Oh. Uh-- 606 00:30:31,363 --> 00:30:33,065 See-See who it is. 607 00:30:33,099 --> 00:30:35,534 No! I know what that means. 608 00:30:35,567 --> 00:30:38,504 God. I have to do everything around here. 609 00:30:40,506 --> 00:30:42,641 Shh. 610 00:30:42,674 --> 00:30:45,344 - Oh! - So this is your room, huh? 611 00:30:45,377 --> 00:30:48,447 Not a good time, Hank. 612 00:30:51,783 --> 00:30:53,419 What the hell happened to him? 613 00:30:54,253 --> 00:30:56,688 Mmm-- Uh-- 614 00:30:56,722 --> 00:30:59,858 Why don't you just come clean, huh? 615 00:30:59,892 --> 00:31:02,294 I'm gonna find out the whole truth about it anyway. 616 00:31:03,930 --> 00:31:06,065 Hank? Yeah? 617 00:31:06,098 --> 00:31:11,037 You want-- You want your son to get married, right? 618 00:31:11,070 --> 00:31:12,104 Of course. Yeah. 619 00:31:12,138 --> 00:31:13,605 Is this guy dead? 620 00:31:15,874 --> 00:31:19,278 And you trust me, right? 621 00:31:19,311 --> 00:31:20,980 Not particularly. 622 00:31:22,414 --> 00:31:25,617 I had a D.U.I. when I was 23. Huge mistake. 623 00:31:25,651 --> 00:31:28,220 Deeply regret it, man. 624 00:31:32,992 --> 00:31:35,928 Good. 625 00:31:35,962 --> 00:31:38,797 - I knew all about that. - Hey! 626 00:31:38,830 --> 00:31:41,133 I was just giving you a test. All right! 627 00:31:42,668 --> 00:31:45,204 Now, honey, chop up this body. 628 00:31:45,237 --> 00:31:47,773 This creepo here, he was-- 629 00:31:47,806 --> 00:31:50,876 He was trying to take this special day... 630 00:31:50,909 --> 00:31:54,580 away from Robbie, you know-- 631 00:31:54,613 --> 00:31:55,982 Away from us. 632 00:31:57,683 --> 00:32:00,919 You may be many not-so-great things, 633 00:32:01,954 --> 00:32:04,323 Hank Fletcher, 634 00:32:04,356 --> 00:32:08,660 but you-- you have always been a good father. 635 00:32:10,196 --> 00:32:12,464 Robbie-- 636 00:32:12,498 --> 00:32:14,633 Robbie needs his daddy right now. 637 00:32:17,669 --> 00:32:19,171 How small you want the pieces? 638 00:32:19,205 --> 00:32:23,109 Oh, probably like 10 total. 639 00:32:23,142 --> 00:32:25,811 I've never done this before. 640 00:32:25,844 --> 00:32:27,813 I'll start with the legs and work my way up. 641 00:32:27,846 --> 00:32:30,149 - We shouldn't be doing this. - Oh, hush, Ted. 642 00:32:31,117 --> 00:32:33,285 Okay. You, uh-- 643 00:32:33,319 --> 00:32:35,021 You-- You do it-- 644 00:32:35,054 --> 00:32:36,955 Oh, God. Hank. 645 00:32:37,990 --> 00:32:40,192 You know, for-- for Robbie. 646 00:32:44,063 --> 00:32:45,464 Let me just... 647 00:32:46,865 --> 00:32:48,534 get him ready here. 648 00:32:48,567 --> 00:32:50,469 Okay. 649 00:32:52,904 --> 00:32:54,140 Ooh. 650 00:32:55,141 --> 00:32:56,175 Oh, God. 651 00:32:56,208 --> 00:32:57,476 Okay. 652 00:32:58,877 --> 00:33:00,846 This brings back memories of the farm. 653 00:33:00,879 --> 00:33:03,515 Cutting a cord of wood for Dad. 654 00:33:03,549 --> 00:33:06,985 Ooh. Okay. Here goes nothing. 655 00:33:14,360 --> 00:33:18,664 What the hell? 656 00:33:20,032 --> 00:33:22,000 My God! 657 00:33:22,034 --> 00:33:23,469 You said he was dead! 658 00:33:23,502 --> 00:33:26,172 I'm sorry, buddy. It's okay. 659 00:33:28,107 --> 00:33:32,244 You just cut my fucking foot off, you human piece of shit! 660 00:33:32,278 --> 00:33:34,513 Make him be quiet! 661 00:33:34,546 --> 00:33:35,981 I'm trying to reason with him. 662 00:33:36,014 --> 00:33:37,816 You just chopped off his foot. 663 00:33:37,849 --> 00:33:40,752 Why would he reason with you? Do something! 664 00:33:40,786 --> 00:33:42,388 Fuckin' piece of-- 665 00:33:46,525 --> 00:33:47,893 Oh, my God! 666 00:33:47,926 --> 00:33:49,161 Oh, fuck! 667 00:33:50,429 --> 00:33:53,332 Oh, my God! 668 00:33:53,365 --> 00:33:55,934 Fuck you people! 669 00:33:58,036 --> 00:34:01,207 Fucking bitch! 670 00:34:01,240 --> 00:34:03,309 I'll never-- You're going down! 671 00:34:07,746 --> 00:34:10,582 Hey, bitch! Fuck you! 672 00:34:21,093 --> 00:34:23,529 What the fuck did I ever do to you people? 673 00:34:23,562 --> 00:34:26,465 You're trying to stand in the way of my son's happiness. 674 00:34:26,498 --> 00:34:28,867 I'm not trying to do that. I don't even know you. 675 00:34:28,900 --> 00:34:31,303 No, no. No, dude! Dude! We can hang out. I'm totally cool-- 676 00:34:32,471 --> 00:34:34,373 I did it again! - Oh, fuck! 677 00:34:34,406 --> 00:34:37,743 Oh, fuck! Just witnessed a murder! 678 00:34:37,776 --> 00:34:40,646 I just filmed a fucking murder! 679 00:34:40,679 --> 00:34:44,483 Blaze! It's not a huge loss, but it's a human life. 680 00:34:47,486 --> 00:34:50,756 The life of an award-winning documentarian is a dangerous one, 681 00:34:50,789 --> 00:34:54,193 but it is the path I have chosen. 682 00:34:55,127 --> 00:34:56,595 For Blaze. 683 00:34:58,797 --> 00:35:00,266 You okay, Yvette? 684 00:35:01,099 --> 00:35:02,268 Oh. 685 00:35:02,301 --> 00:35:03,669 I'm fine. 686 00:35:05,304 --> 00:35:08,374 Hank. You tried to protect me. 687 00:35:10,476 --> 00:35:13,979 Well... sure, I-- You're a lady. 688 00:35:14,012 --> 00:35:16,815 Ted, you look like you could use some rest. 689 00:35:16,848 --> 00:35:19,485 Why don't you go clean up? Hank and I can take care of this. 690 00:35:19,518 --> 00:35:21,487 Yeah, yeah. I'm gonna-- 691 00:35:22,388 --> 00:35:24,490 Oh. 692 00:35:24,523 --> 00:35:26,292 Oh, my goodness. 693 00:35:26,325 --> 00:35:28,827 You're hurt. Oh. 694 00:35:28,860 --> 00:35:33,232 Let me patch you up. Just let me find something. 695 00:35:35,834 --> 00:35:37,135 Oh, Hank. 696 00:35:41,840 --> 00:35:44,310 Maybe we should finish cutting him into pieces so-- 697 00:35:45,511 --> 00:35:47,579 You are such a boy. 698 00:35:48,480 --> 00:35:50,649 Take your shirt off. 699 00:35:51,583 --> 00:35:52,984 Leave your top off. 700 00:35:56,054 --> 00:35:57,789 Whoa! Oh! 701 00:36:22,281 --> 00:36:24,916 It's-- It's really not necessary, Marvin. 702 00:36:24,950 --> 00:36:27,052 We could just put on the radio. 703 00:36:27,085 --> 00:36:30,422 Listen, when you hire DJ Awesome-sauce, 704 00:36:30,456 --> 00:36:32,258 you get the full package. 705 00:36:32,291 --> 00:36:36,194 I know how to set the mood for some lady pamperin'! 706 00:36:37,729 --> 00:36:40,399 He's been through a lot in the war. 707 00:36:40,432 --> 00:36:43,602 He was such a sweet little boy. 708 00:36:45,637 --> 00:36:49,140 You're doing a wonderful job, Marvin. 709 00:36:50,442 --> 00:36:52,778 Aunt Barbara! 710 00:36:56,648 --> 00:36:59,050 Oh, my gosh. 711 00:36:59,084 --> 00:37:01,387 I hate to bring this up, but at some point... 712 00:37:01,420 --> 00:37:05,123 you're gonna have to consider just replacing Pensee. 713 00:37:05,156 --> 00:37:08,894 You need a fully functioning maid of honor to do important tasks like... 714 00:37:08,927 --> 00:37:11,229 bouquet management and train wrangling. 715 00:37:11,263 --> 00:37:15,467 Oh, hey. Where have you been? Are you okay? 716 00:37:15,501 --> 00:37:20,105 - Oh. I am great. - Oh. 717 00:37:20,138 --> 00:37:23,775 What's not to love on a... perfect day like this? 718 00:37:25,277 --> 00:37:28,780 Knock, knock, knock. Is everybody decent? 719 00:37:28,814 --> 00:37:32,551 Oh. Ladies. Hi. 720 00:37:32,584 --> 00:37:34,620 I know it's bad luck for the groom to see the bride, 721 00:37:34,653 --> 00:37:38,457 but it's just my bad luck that I am not the groom. 722 00:37:40,826 --> 00:37:43,562 Seriously, I came to deliver this. 723 00:37:43,595 --> 00:37:46,665 Oh. Well, thank you. 724 00:37:46,698 --> 00:37:49,735 What a lovely package. 725 00:37:49,768 --> 00:37:52,838 You didn't have to do that. Thank you. 726 00:37:52,871 --> 00:37:54,806 Oh! Yes. 727 00:37:54,840 --> 00:37:56,808 Yeah, I know it's your favorite. 728 00:37:56,842 --> 00:37:59,745 In fact, the funny thing is, whenever I smell it, 729 00:37:59,778 --> 00:38:01,913 I still-- 730 00:38:01,947 --> 00:38:03,649 think of you. 731 00:38:05,150 --> 00:38:07,152 I was thinking you could wear it for the ceremony. 732 00:38:07,185 --> 00:38:08,854 Oh. 733 00:38:10,722 --> 00:38:14,092 - Y-Y-Yeah. - Mm-hmm. 734 00:38:14,125 --> 00:38:15,627 Thank you. My pleasure. Absolute pleasure. 735 00:38:17,663 --> 00:38:19,698 Is that chardonnay? Please. 736 00:38:21,132 --> 00:38:23,001 - Mother. - Yo. Sully. 737 00:38:26,472 --> 00:38:28,774 Hey, Steve. I'm getting some pretty good stuff, man. 738 00:38:28,807 --> 00:38:31,510 Okay. Good, good. Great. Great. 739 00:38:31,543 --> 00:38:35,481 Uh, listen. You... seen Blaze around? 740 00:38:35,514 --> 00:38:38,016 He's probably around here somewhere getting high. 741 00:38:38,049 --> 00:38:39,985 - You know how he does it. - Yeah. 742 00:38:40,018 --> 00:38:42,654 But his phone's going to voice mail. 743 00:38:42,688 --> 00:38:46,458 - Fuckin' Blaze. Always been a little unreliable, right? - Yeah. 744 00:38:46,492 --> 00:38:48,259 Trust me, bro. Never gonna hire that bitch again. 745 00:38:51,563 --> 00:38:56,368 Is it just me, or is something really weird going on here today? 746 00:38:56,402 --> 00:38:59,137 I mean, people are actually starting to avoid the cameras. 747 00:38:59,170 --> 00:39:00,806 Hey. Look. Just-- Just-- 748 00:39:00,839 --> 00:39:03,375 Just stay on task, okay, Sully? 749 00:39:03,409 --> 00:39:05,411 It's just you and me now, man. 750 00:39:05,444 --> 00:39:06,878 Forever. 751 00:39:08,580 --> 00:39:10,816 Hey. Proud of you. 752 00:39:10,849 --> 00:39:12,651 Thank you. 753 00:39:12,684 --> 00:39:14,586 - You're welcome. And I mean that. - Thank you. 754 00:39:14,620 --> 00:39:17,355 - Proud. - I feel it. 755 00:39:17,389 --> 00:39:19,057 Okay. All right. 756 00:39:19,090 --> 00:39:22,360 - Hey, and whatever you do, just don't stop filming. - Okay. 757 00:39:22,394 --> 00:39:24,896 Okay? Keep that shit rolling. I will. 758 00:39:24,930 --> 00:39:26,798 At all times. 759 00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:31,236 Okay. Okay. 760 00:39:31,269 --> 00:39:33,439 Mika, look how pretty Mommy looks, hmm? 761 00:39:33,472 --> 00:39:35,541 How are you, Mika? 762 00:39:35,574 --> 00:39:38,744 Huh? 763 00:39:41,146 --> 00:39:43,615 Ted. You scared the shit out of me. 764 00:39:43,649 --> 00:39:45,116 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 765 00:39:45,150 --> 00:39:47,185 Are you drunk? 766 00:39:47,218 --> 00:39:48,787 No! No. No. 767 00:39:48,820 --> 00:39:50,689 What have you been doing? 768 00:39:50,722 --> 00:39:52,323 I can't tell you. It's a secret. 769 00:39:54,125 --> 00:39:56,194 We don't keep secrets. 770 00:39:56,227 --> 00:39:57,963 - Hi, Mika. 771 00:39:57,996 --> 00:40:01,633 I can't tell anyone. I promised. It'll ruin the entire wedding. 772 00:40:01,667 --> 00:40:06,037 Fine. You and Robert are up to some lamebrained scheme then? 773 00:40:06,071 --> 00:40:07,473 You don't have to tell me. 774 00:40:12,077 --> 00:40:15,080 Robert shot Pensee, and she fell out of a window and she died. 775 00:40:15,113 --> 00:40:17,749 The cameraman saw it and I had to hit him in the head with a rock, 776 00:40:17,783 --> 00:40:20,452 but then he didn't die, so I chopped him in the head with an ax! 777 00:40:20,486 --> 00:40:23,054 And Yvette made me promise not to say anything until the wedding was over, 778 00:40:23,088 --> 00:40:25,757 since Pensee would have wanted it that way, for Rosemary to have a perfect day. 779 00:40:25,791 --> 00:40:28,026 And if you divorce me, I won't fight you. You can have everything. I'm sorry. 780 00:40:30,261 --> 00:40:31,997 Pensee's dead? Super dead. 781 00:40:36,468 --> 00:40:39,805 That means Rosemary's going to need a new maid of honor. Sure. 782 00:40:39,838 --> 00:40:43,842 You need to get cleaned up and into your suit. The pictures are about to happen. 783 00:40:43,875 --> 00:40:44,943 And, Ted? What? 784 00:40:44,976 --> 00:40:46,077 Fix your hair. 785 00:40:46,111 --> 00:40:48,614 I'll put water on it. Mika? 786 00:40:48,647 --> 00:40:51,917 Mommy has to go! She's about to be promoted to maid of honor! 787 00:40:54,352 --> 00:40:56,688 Robert, Rosemary, 788 00:40:56,722 --> 00:41:00,759 you're gonna be the most beautiful couple ever in history. 789 00:41:00,792 --> 00:41:03,795 And I love you very, very much. 790 00:41:03,829 --> 00:41:07,032 Rosemary, listen to this. This is gold, okay? 791 00:41:07,065 --> 00:41:08,667 We went to an obedience class with our dog, 792 00:41:08,700 --> 00:41:10,669 but secretly, I was listening to the trainer... 793 00:41:10,702 --> 00:41:13,672 because I thought, "I might be able to use these skills in real life." 794 00:41:13,705 --> 00:41:15,974 And it worked. 795 00:41:16,007 --> 00:41:19,044 We-- We love you. Say something else. 796 00:41:19,077 --> 00:41:20,546 Does this remind you of something? 797 00:41:24,716 --> 00:41:28,053 - You know-- - I mean, food incentive is everything to a man. 798 00:41:28,086 --> 00:41:31,790 Robert. Robert. 799 00:41:31,823 --> 00:41:36,628 Robert and Rosemary, I think the foundation of a good marriage... 800 00:41:36,662 --> 00:41:38,329 is sex. 801 00:41:42,000 --> 00:41:43,902 Love, love. 802 00:41:43,935 --> 00:41:45,904 Just stop it. Okay. 803 00:41:45,937 --> 00:41:48,640 She knows. I told her everything. I'm sorry. 804 00:41:48,674 --> 00:41:50,876 What is wrong with you? 805 00:41:50,909 --> 00:41:52,978 She seems cool with it though. 806 00:41:53,011 --> 00:41:54,846 She does? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 807 00:41:54,880 --> 00:41:58,850 Okay, people. I charge by the second, okay, so all eyes on me. 808 00:41:58,884 --> 00:42:02,220 Um, we are missing somebody. Somebody in white? 809 00:42:06,057 --> 00:42:07,425 Hi. 810 00:42:07,458 --> 00:42:09,360 Oh, wait. Where is-- Where's Pensee? 811 00:42:09,394 --> 00:42:11,563 She's seriously still not down yet? 812 00:42:11,597 --> 00:42:14,900 Oh, uh-- She must still be feeling sick. 813 00:42:14,933 --> 00:42:17,936 Actually-- Oh, I hate telling you this, 814 00:42:17,969 --> 00:42:20,371 but she left. 815 00:42:20,405 --> 00:42:22,674 She told me that this place was total lamesville... 816 00:42:22,708 --> 00:42:24,676 and that she had to go find a place... 817 00:42:24,710 --> 00:42:28,113 to get drunk and find a guy and have casual sex with him. 818 00:42:28,146 --> 00:42:30,115 Uh, that doesn't sound like Pensee. 819 00:42:30,148 --> 00:42:32,283 Actually, she said the same thing to me, 820 00:42:32,317 --> 00:42:35,053 and she wasn't wearing any panties, so-- 821 00:42:35,086 --> 00:42:38,957 It might be time for you to choose a new maid of honor. 822 00:42:38,990 --> 00:42:41,893 It's just-- You know, I don't think she's coming back. 823 00:42:41,927 --> 00:42:44,262 Violet, will you step in for Pensee while I figure all this out? 824 00:42:44,295 --> 00:42:46,097 - Of course. - Thank you. 825 00:42:46,131 --> 00:42:51,102 Okay, yay. Crisis averted. Okay, picture time, okay? Um-- 826 00:42:51,136 --> 00:42:53,104 If we could clear a path here... 827 00:42:53,138 --> 00:42:55,473 and everyone gather around the trunk. 828 00:42:55,506 --> 00:42:58,476 This will be a beautiful shot of you guys. 829 00:42:58,509 --> 00:43:03,148 Are we-- You know, are we sure that we want to take the pictures here? 830 00:43:03,181 --> 00:43:05,784 Isn't it a little-- I don't know-- tacky? 831 00:43:05,817 --> 00:43:08,219 - Tacky, right? - What's tacky about it? 832 00:43:08,253 --> 00:43:12,457 You know, I-- I think that it's this trunk, actually. 833 00:43:12,490 --> 00:43:14,993 What if we took the pictures over there? Look over there. 834 00:43:15,026 --> 00:43:17,829 Wouldn't it be beautiful if we took the pictures over by those trees? 835 00:43:17,863 --> 00:43:21,066 If you feel that strongly about it, why don't we just move the trunk? 836 00:43:21,099 --> 00:43:24,035 Yes. Move the trunk. 837 00:43:25,704 --> 00:43:27,939 Pay no attention to me. Women, right? 838 00:43:27,973 --> 00:43:29,908 Let's just take the pictures. 839 00:43:29,941 --> 00:43:31,743 Yeah, let's take the pictures. I love that idea. 840 00:43:33,879 --> 00:43:37,415 Love it. Everyone, here, here. Intense, intense. 841 00:43:37,448 --> 00:43:40,585 Yes. Hide that secret. Keep that secret. I love it. 842 00:43:40,618 --> 00:43:43,789 Yes, yes. I just did something really bad and nobody knows. 843 00:43:43,822 --> 00:43:46,491 Okay, now I need the groomsmen, all you boys. 844 00:43:46,524 --> 00:43:49,494 Okay, hold on. Okay, we're losing light. 845 00:43:49,527 --> 00:43:51,697 So can you guys move the bench a few feet to the left? 846 00:43:51,730 --> 00:43:53,431 - Oh, yeah. I got it. - No, no, no. 847 00:43:53,464 --> 00:43:54,866 I got it. Let me do it. 848 00:43:54,900 --> 00:43:56,334 I don't care who does it. 849 00:43:56,367 --> 00:43:58,670 Why is this so heavy? Well, uh-- 850 00:43:58,704 --> 00:44:00,505 ...heavy in here. 851 00:44:05,176 --> 00:44:08,346 Say, Hank-- Can I call you Hank? 852 00:44:08,379 --> 00:44:11,616 May I just say, Hank, uh-- 853 00:44:15,420 --> 00:44:17,488 You know what? You know what? This is what we're gonna do. 854 00:44:17,522 --> 00:44:20,225 I'm just gonna sit here for all these, okay? Just like this. 855 00:44:20,258 --> 00:44:23,494 You know what? Ted's gonna sit here too. Just the two of us on the b-- 856 00:44:23,528 --> 00:44:26,297 Hey, come on. Come on. Everybody on top. 857 00:44:26,331 --> 00:44:29,134 Just like this for the rest of the photos. They're all gonna look like this, okay? 858 00:44:33,538 --> 00:44:36,674 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. 859 00:44:36,708 --> 00:44:39,210 Okay. Let's stand up. - No, no. I like this look. 860 00:44:40,078 --> 00:44:41,747 That's my big thing. 861 00:44:41,780 --> 00:44:43,548 How about we stand up, Robert? 862 00:44:43,581 --> 00:44:45,851 Hey, red! Hey, red! 863 00:44:45,884 --> 00:44:48,653 Take the shot, red! Clickity-click. Clickity-click it. 864 00:44:48,686 --> 00:44:50,688 There has been a lot of sitting. 865 00:44:50,722 --> 00:44:53,158 Happy. Yay! We're getting married. It's not a funeral. 866 00:44:53,191 --> 00:44:54,860 Robert. Robert. Robert. Mm-hmm? 867 00:44:54,893 --> 00:44:56,161 Hey. Hey. 868 00:44:56,194 --> 00:44:58,997 Today's our wedding day. I know. 869 00:44:59,030 --> 00:45:01,232 I want you to be here. I'm here. 870 00:45:01,266 --> 00:45:03,234 With me. Okay? Did something happen last night? 871 00:45:03,268 --> 00:45:04,569 No. What's going on? 872 00:45:04,602 --> 00:45:06,905 Okay. Maybe after we're done here, 873 00:45:06,938 --> 00:45:09,007 we can just have a moment, just the two of us? Yeah. 874 00:45:09,040 --> 00:45:11,242 Just like you and I, away from everybody else? 875 00:45:11,276 --> 00:45:14,212 I would love that. I would love that. Just you and me. 876 00:45:14,245 --> 00:45:15,747 You mean that? Yeah. Of course. 877 00:45:15,781 --> 00:45:17,015 I'd like that. Okay? 878 00:45:25,456 --> 00:45:28,559 Yes. I don't think she knew him that well. 879 00:45:28,593 --> 00:45:30,561 Tons of phrases. "Shut your yap." 880 00:45:30,595 --> 00:45:32,697 Oh. Hey. We're so glad to have you here. 881 00:45:32,730 --> 00:45:35,233 Part of my-- 882 00:45:35,266 --> 00:45:36,968 And-- 883 00:45:42,273 --> 00:45:44,609 Psst. Robert. 884 00:45:44,642 --> 00:45:47,378 We gotta talk. 885 00:45:49,014 --> 00:45:50,982 I hate to be the bearer of bad news, 886 00:45:51,016 --> 00:45:53,751 but there are some shady operations going on around here. 887 00:45:53,785 --> 00:45:56,121 Like what? 888 00:45:56,154 --> 00:45:59,925 This morning, when I went to be with the guns, like any other morning, 889 00:45:59,958 --> 00:46:02,760 it looked as if the lock had been forced. 890 00:46:02,794 --> 00:46:06,064 And a shotgun had been fired. That's probably just some kids. 891 00:46:06,097 --> 00:46:09,334 Then, after that, there's been disappearances. 892 00:46:09,367 --> 00:46:10,668 Pensee. 893 00:46:12,103 --> 00:46:13,604 I went by her room, 894 00:46:13,638 --> 00:46:16,341 where she's supposedly crippled with the runs. 895 00:46:16,374 --> 00:46:19,878 But when I broke in, she wasn't there. 896 00:46:20,645 --> 00:46:23,648 And her toilet... 897 00:46:23,681 --> 00:46:25,216 was clean. 898 00:46:28,219 --> 00:46:30,555 And one of the cameramen is missing too. 899 00:46:32,390 --> 00:46:33,992 I've been gathering evidence, 900 00:46:35,393 --> 00:46:38,329 recording everything with my spy cam. 901 00:46:38,363 --> 00:46:40,131 Oh, sh-- 902 00:46:45,303 --> 00:46:49,540 And I think I've pretty much figured out who's responsible. 903 00:46:50,641 --> 00:46:53,011 Fuck me. Who? 904 00:46:54,145 --> 00:46:56,848 Ted? 905 00:46:58,249 --> 00:47:02,620 Look in his eyes. I've seen that before. 906 00:47:02,653 --> 00:47:05,523 That's a man who's just been in the shit for the first time. 907 00:47:07,425 --> 00:47:10,061 I'll shadow him. No, no, no, no. 908 00:47:10,095 --> 00:47:11,963 No, no. No, don't follow him. 909 00:47:11,997 --> 00:47:15,901 No, no, it can't be Ted because Ted's been with me all day. 910 00:47:15,934 --> 00:47:19,237 So-- You know who it could be? 911 00:47:20,371 --> 00:47:22,373 You know who it could be? 912 00:47:22,840 --> 00:47:25,376 Declan! 913 00:47:25,410 --> 00:47:27,045 Rosemary's handsome English ex? 914 00:47:27,078 --> 00:47:29,214 He's not that handsome. He's cute. 915 00:47:29,247 --> 00:47:34,819 But-- No! Pensee and the cameraman and Declan together. 916 00:47:34,852 --> 00:47:37,688 A nefarious scheme to ruin the wedding. 917 00:47:37,722 --> 00:47:40,358 Yeah. He said some suspicious stuff earlier. 918 00:47:40,391 --> 00:47:44,195 And then he laughed like-- 919 00:47:44,229 --> 00:47:46,431 Okay, that's suspicious. Yeah. 920 00:47:46,464 --> 00:47:48,199 I'm on the case. Go get 'em. Yeah. 921 00:47:48,233 --> 00:47:51,903 Make love to the camera. Or me. Love it. 922 00:47:51,937 --> 00:47:55,740 We can chop her up later. That'll make it really look like a Mexican drug cartel. 923 00:47:55,773 --> 00:47:59,377 - We can mix and match. - Mom. Mom. Dad. Mom. 924 00:47:59,410 --> 00:48:04,082 Why is Pensee's car in the "you know"? 925 00:48:04,882 --> 00:48:06,918 Oh. 926 00:48:06,952 --> 00:48:10,855 Honey, I didn't know they were gonna use the "you know" in the pictures. 927 00:48:10,888 --> 00:48:14,459 But don't worry about it. Your father and I will dispose of it. 928 00:48:14,492 --> 00:48:17,495 I asked you to keep an eye on her, Dad, not to help her. 929 00:48:19,130 --> 00:48:22,233 I haven't taken my eyes off her once. 930 00:48:22,267 --> 00:48:25,570 You're so sweet. Thanks. 931 00:48:25,603 --> 00:48:27,805 What-- What-- 932 00:48:27,838 --> 00:48:30,775 What's going on, guys? You guys hate each other. 933 00:48:30,808 --> 00:48:33,711 We can't rekindle our old flame? 934 00:48:33,744 --> 00:48:36,147 - Mmm! - Mm-mmm-mmm! 935 00:48:36,181 --> 00:48:38,083 Ew! 936 00:48:38,116 --> 00:48:40,085 Where was this attitude when I was 12? 937 00:48:40,118 --> 00:48:42,420 Would've saved me a lot of trips to the school counselor. 938 00:48:42,453 --> 00:48:47,158 Oh, honey, don't you see that everything-- everything happens for a reason. 939 00:48:47,192 --> 00:48:49,627 There's magic in the air. Magic. 940 00:48:49,660 --> 00:48:52,097 Magic. Magic. We're all going to jail! 941 00:48:52,130 --> 00:48:54,332 Hey! 942 00:48:54,365 --> 00:48:57,235 And Marvin-- Marvin knows too, by the way. 943 00:48:57,268 --> 00:48:58,903 He knows something's going on. 944 00:48:58,936 --> 00:49:01,906 Maybe I should have your father, um, 945 00:49:01,939 --> 00:49:03,674 talk to him. 946 00:49:03,708 --> 00:49:05,776 No. No! 947 00:49:07,045 --> 00:49:09,280 Marvin is harmless. Okay? 948 00:49:09,314 --> 00:49:12,583 I sent him on a wild-goose chase. All right? 949 00:49:12,617 --> 00:49:16,454 Hey, you guys, no more doing anything. No more helping. 950 00:49:16,487 --> 00:49:19,457 You think of doing something, you do the different. Okay? 951 00:49:19,490 --> 00:49:21,592 This is my wedding, my rules. Promise me! 952 00:49:21,626 --> 00:49:23,728 Promise me! Don't do anything! Promise! 953 00:49:26,031 --> 00:49:27,432 Okay. Okay. 954 00:49:27,465 --> 00:49:29,767 - Okay? - All right. 955 00:49:29,800 --> 00:49:32,103 Okay. 956 00:49:32,137 --> 00:49:33,804 Calm down. He's so excitable. 957 00:49:33,838 --> 00:49:36,374 I know. I don't know where he-- 958 00:49:36,407 --> 00:49:39,144 Where did you learn to dance like this? 959 00:49:44,215 --> 00:49:46,684 Swift, silent and deadly. 960 00:49:48,986 --> 00:49:50,721 Hey! Hey. 961 00:49:54,159 --> 00:49:57,328 Has my future husband made a little time for me? All the time in the world. 962 00:49:57,362 --> 00:49:59,364 Yeah, right. 963 00:49:59,397 --> 00:50:01,632 Ho-ho! Whoa! Robert. 964 00:50:01,666 --> 00:50:05,370 Just wanted to let you know-- I have taken care of it. 965 00:50:05,403 --> 00:50:07,372 You can rest easy. 966 00:50:07,405 --> 00:50:10,341 Good. Great. Thanks. 967 00:50:10,375 --> 00:50:12,243 Wait. What? Take care of what? 968 00:50:12,277 --> 00:50:14,645 El problemo... 969 00:50:14,679 --> 00:50:16,247 with "Eclan"... 970 00:50:17,115 --> 00:50:19,850 acting "espicious." 971 00:50:19,884 --> 00:50:22,220 - Es no problemo. - I know what that means. 972 00:50:23,888 --> 00:50:26,857 Why don't you take a look at that picture of... 973 00:50:26,891 --> 00:50:30,928 that guy... I was telling you about, doing that funny thing. 974 00:50:30,961 --> 00:50:32,697 Don't look, Rosemary. What's wrong? 975 00:50:32,730 --> 00:50:35,333 Oh, that's the cutest little kitten I've ever seen. 976 00:50:35,366 --> 00:50:36,934 Do you remember that kitten? 977 00:50:36,967 --> 00:50:41,005 Baby. Baby, I'm so sorry. I'm gonna be right back. No. No. No. 978 00:50:41,038 --> 00:50:43,574 I gotta go look at some pictures of the kittens. There's so many kittens! 979 00:50:43,608 --> 00:50:45,843 Robert! Oh, look at the pictures of the kittens! 980 00:50:48,379 --> 00:50:49,814 Unbelievable. 981 00:50:51,782 --> 00:50:54,519 Ohh. 982 00:50:54,552 --> 00:50:56,721 I didn't ask you... 983 00:50:56,754 --> 00:50:58,389 to kidnap him. 984 00:50:58,423 --> 00:51:00,858 Just doing my duty. 985 00:51:00,891 --> 00:51:03,594 He's been keeping quiet about his plans... 986 00:51:03,628 --> 00:51:06,131 and where his coconspirators are hiding. Oh, my-- 987 00:51:06,164 --> 00:51:09,234 But I will get it out of him. 988 00:51:13,804 --> 00:51:16,741 I have been waiting to do this to an enemy combatant... 989 00:51:16,774 --> 00:51:18,443 for a while. 990 00:51:18,476 --> 00:51:22,980 No, you can't torture him! Okay? I was speculating earlier! 991 00:51:23,013 --> 00:51:26,751 Robert, I-- I swear I'm not here to ruin the wedding. 992 00:51:26,784 --> 00:51:29,053 Declan-- Robert, I swear on my life. 993 00:51:29,086 --> 00:51:30,755 I'm so sorry. I'm a friend. 994 00:51:30,788 --> 00:51:32,423 This guy's-- 995 00:51:32,457 --> 00:51:34,091 Some friend! 996 00:51:34,125 --> 00:51:36,761 I'm sorry. Robert. 997 00:51:36,794 --> 00:51:39,063 Jesus-- Oh, God! 998 00:51:39,096 --> 00:51:41,766 What are you planning? 999 00:51:42,933 --> 00:51:45,436 Why do you hate American freedoms? 1000 00:51:45,470 --> 00:51:48,072 I don't. I'm from England. 1001 00:51:48,105 --> 00:51:49,840 We're allies. 1002 00:51:49,874 --> 00:51:52,777 These colors don't run, terrorist. 1003 00:51:52,810 --> 00:51:54,579 What? 1004 00:51:54,612 --> 00:51:58,516 Oh, good Lord. You do know our flags are the same colors. 1005 00:51:58,549 --> 00:52:01,919 You fuckin'... motherfucker! 1006 00:52:01,952 --> 00:52:04,755 No! No! No! 1007 00:52:16,834 --> 00:52:20,205 Whoo-hoo-hoo! 1008 00:52:20,238 --> 00:52:22,106 Stop! Stop it! 1009 00:52:22,139 --> 00:52:23,841 All right! I admit it! 1010 00:52:23,874 --> 00:52:26,511 I-- I'm here to steal Rosemary back. 1011 00:52:26,544 --> 00:52:29,046 - What? - Oh, yeah. 1012 00:52:29,079 --> 00:52:31,816 I was on my way to convince her to run away with me, 1013 00:52:31,849 --> 00:52:35,320 you boring sot! 1014 00:52:35,353 --> 00:52:37,021 You were always so nice to me. 1015 00:52:37,054 --> 00:52:40,391 Well, I was playing you for a fool, 1016 00:52:40,425 --> 00:52:42,927 you twat! 1017 00:52:45,563 --> 00:52:47,698 Soldier. Huh? 1018 00:52:47,732 --> 00:52:51,068 Detain this man till after the ceremony. 1019 00:52:51,101 --> 00:52:53,871 It would be my pleasure. R-Robert, no. Help. 1020 00:52:53,904 --> 00:52:55,640 You have to help me. 1021 00:52:55,673 --> 00:52:57,342 Are you fucking kidding me? 1022 00:52:57,375 --> 00:53:00,578 Rodrigo is the best. 1023 00:53:00,611 --> 00:53:02,380 So how many stiffs you got, woman? 1024 00:53:02,413 --> 00:53:04,014 Sully! 1025 00:53:04,048 --> 00:53:05,916 Just the two. Get the fuck over here. 1026 00:53:05,950 --> 00:53:09,387 We had to fold her in and kind of pushed her down. 1027 00:53:09,420 --> 00:53:11,889 You want to pick her up by the torso. Come on. What's going on? 1028 00:53:11,922 --> 00:53:15,192 Okay, don't-- don't react. 1029 00:53:15,226 --> 00:53:18,996 Just... look at this. 1030 00:53:19,029 --> 00:53:21,699 You got her? 1031 00:53:24,034 --> 00:53:26,237 Grab-- Oh! 1032 00:53:26,271 --> 00:53:28,339 Here, I got her leg. I got her leg. 1033 00:53:28,373 --> 00:53:31,075 Is that chick fuckin' dead? Shh! Don't-- 1034 00:53:31,108 --> 00:53:33,077 Just you and me, Harry Potter. 1035 00:53:35,112 --> 00:53:37,348 Just me and you, boy. 1036 00:53:40,251 --> 00:53:41,519 Don't. Don't! 1037 00:53:46,657 --> 00:53:49,394 Okay, now help me-- We gotta call the cops. 1038 00:53:49,427 --> 00:53:51,729 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 1039 00:53:53,130 --> 00:53:54,899 Or... 1040 00:53:54,932 --> 00:53:56,534 we could keep shooting. 1041 00:53:59,270 --> 00:54:03,641 Oh, you limeys are such pussies. 1042 00:54:03,674 --> 00:54:07,312 Back in the corps, we used to shock ourselves for fun! 1043 00:54:15,920 --> 00:54:19,824 We got a serious murder story happening here at the Milton's family wedding. 1044 00:54:19,857 --> 00:54:22,226 We're getting it on H.D., man! 1045 00:54:22,259 --> 00:54:25,229 Do you have any idea how much we could sell this doc for? 1046 00:54:25,262 --> 00:54:30,134 I'm kinda thinking that this could be Oscar nomination material, man. 1047 00:54:30,167 --> 00:54:33,971 You're naughty! Here I come! Oh, no, no! Uh-oh! 1048 00:54:34,004 --> 00:54:36,741 We could kinda become like those journalists who gained the trust... 1049 00:54:36,774 --> 00:54:39,577 of criminals or-- or warlords. 1050 00:54:45,883 --> 00:54:47,885 Hello? 1051 00:54:50,120 --> 00:54:51,989 Hello! 1052 00:54:52,022 --> 00:54:53,791 You think we're in danger? Definitely. 1053 00:54:55,793 --> 00:54:57,428 I mean, where's Blaze? 1054 00:54:57,462 --> 00:54:59,464 Oh, Blaze is-- 1055 00:55:00,665 --> 00:55:02,867 halfway home. 1056 00:55:02,900 --> 00:55:07,304 Sent him early with some incriminating footage to, you know, ensure our safety. 1057 00:55:08,539 --> 00:55:10,508 Oh, you're a genius, Steve. 1058 00:55:10,541 --> 00:55:12,510 A genius. Yeah, I know. 1059 00:55:12,543 --> 00:55:13,978 Tell me about it, bro. 1060 00:55:14,011 --> 00:55:16,647 One, two, three-- 1061 00:55:16,681 --> 00:55:18,683 Oh! There you are! 1062 00:55:19,850 --> 00:55:22,319 What in holy hog's hell... 1063 00:55:22,353 --> 00:55:24,021 am I paying you clowns for? 1064 00:55:24,054 --> 00:55:26,023 I mean, here you are, diddling around. 1065 00:55:26,056 --> 00:55:28,292 My daughter, the bride-- 1066 00:55:28,325 --> 00:55:30,294 You remember meeting her? 1067 00:55:30,327 --> 00:55:32,897 There's not a single camera on her. 1068 00:55:32,930 --> 00:55:34,665 Extremely sorry, Judge Milton. 1069 00:55:34,699 --> 00:55:38,836 Sully, why don't you hop up and go grab some Rosemary footage? Okay? 1070 00:55:38,869 --> 00:55:40,838 What I am paying you two goons, 1071 00:55:40,871 --> 00:55:42,840 this better be the best damn wedding video ever. 1072 00:55:42,873 --> 00:55:44,842 It's gonna be killer. 1073 00:55:44,875 --> 00:55:47,044 Steve thinks we'll get an Oscar nomination for it. 1074 00:55:47,077 --> 00:55:49,380 What the hell are you talking about? 1075 00:55:49,414 --> 00:55:51,849 Nothin'. 1076 00:55:51,882 --> 00:55:54,251 Hair of the dog, buddy. Yeah. Come on. Let me hear. 1077 00:55:54,284 --> 00:55:56,687 You ready to ush the shit out of this wedding, buddy? 1078 00:55:56,721 --> 00:55:59,657 Hell, yeah, I am. I was born to ush shit. Hell, yeah! Come on! 1079 00:55:59,690 --> 00:56:02,159 Ush! Ush! Ush! U-- 1080 00:56:02,192 --> 00:56:04,328 You guys part of the wedding? Yeah. We're ushers. 1081 00:56:04,361 --> 00:56:07,164 - Hey, you're the priest! - I'm a pastor. 1082 00:56:07,197 --> 00:56:09,900 Sorry. Okay, you guys, uh-- 1083 00:56:09,934 --> 00:56:13,103 Point me in the direction of the bride and groom. My Jag, it's been acting up. 1084 00:56:13,137 --> 00:56:16,707 Oh, yeah, about that-- the groom's missing. 1085 00:56:16,741 --> 00:56:19,544 We're keeping that on the D.L., though, so, you know... be cool? 1086 00:56:19,577 --> 00:56:22,847 Yeah, I'm cool. I get paid by the hour. Right. See-- Hey! 1087 00:56:22,880 --> 00:56:26,451 F.Y.I., the guests are starting to seat themselves. 1088 00:56:26,484 --> 00:56:28,686 I'll be in the bar. 1089 00:56:28,719 --> 00:56:30,555 Priest just took my beer. 1090 00:56:30,588 --> 00:56:33,090 Rosemary? Rosemary. 1091 00:56:33,123 --> 00:56:35,893 My future honey, um, is-- 1092 00:56:35,926 --> 00:56:38,896 I hope that I can find you so that we can actually get married. 1093 00:56:38,929 --> 00:56:43,768 And then all will be well and... we'll be in love, and hopefully, uh-- 1094 00:56:43,801 --> 00:56:46,804 Have you guys seen him, or-- Not happening? 1095 00:56:46,837 --> 00:56:49,440 Uh, no. I don't know. I mean, what do you guys want? 1096 00:56:49,474 --> 00:56:51,576 Love you, bunny. 1097 00:56:51,609 --> 00:56:53,110 * It's a long way home 1098 00:56:53,143 --> 00:56:56,581 * But, ah, we can make it 1099 00:56:56,614 --> 00:56:59,316 I'm not sure if it's going. 1100 00:56:59,349 --> 00:57:02,419 Is the red light on? Uh, I don't know. 1101 00:57:02,453 --> 00:57:05,122 Where's the red light supposed to be? Hold on. 1102 00:57:05,155 --> 00:57:09,960 I-- Is it on? The l-- There's a red spot on the lens. 1103 00:57:09,994 --> 00:57:13,297 It's a red light. Okay, hold on. Red light, red light, red light. 1104 00:57:13,330 --> 00:57:16,133 They got so many buttons on these things these days. 1105 00:57:16,166 --> 00:57:17,802 I'm gonna try this. 1106 00:57:17,835 --> 00:57:22,807 Uh, yeah, I think that's it. I think I got it. I think it's going. 1107 00:57:22,840 --> 00:57:25,576 Oh. Hey. That doesn't look too bad, does it? 1108 00:57:25,610 --> 00:57:27,177 That looks great. 1109 00:57:28,479 --> 00:57:30,447 You look pretty good too. 1110 00:57:30,481 --> 00:57:32,817 Hi. Hi! 1111 00:57:35,119 --> 00:57:38,823 Okay, we got 10 minutes. We gotta go quick. We gotta make this quick. 1112 00:57:38,856 --> 00:57:41,859 You know how to-- That was great. 1113 00:57:41,892 --> 00:57:44,094 Game face, bitch. 1114 00:57:44,128 --> 00:57:48,032 We got, like, three choices for dinner tonight. Yeah. 1115 00:57:48,065 --> 00:57:51,669 The beef-- Yeah, that's good. That's good. 1116 00:57:51,702 --> 00:57:55,139 The beef is good. Real good beef! 1117 00:57:55,172 --> 00:57:56,974 Mm-hmm! That's good beef. 1118 00:58:00,477 --> 00:58:02,146 Uh-- 1119 00:58:02,179 --> 00:58:03,848 Yes? 1120 00:58:03,881 --> 00:58:05,883 Uh, who is it? It's Steve. 1121 00:58:05,916 --> 00:58:08,519 - Could I come in for a minute? - Oh, uh, no. 1122 00:58:08,553 --> 00:58:11,355 Um, I-I can't come to the door right now. 1123 00:58:11,388 --> 00:58:13,558 I'm, um-- I'm-- Having sex, for Pete's sake! 1124 00:58:13,591 --> 00:58:14,959 Hank! 1125 00:58:14,992 --> 00:58:17,494 Yeah, okay. Well-- 1126 00:58:17,528 --> 00:58:20,330 I kinda feel like it's important that I speak to you. 1127 00:58:20,364 --> 00:58:24,201 Oh, for God's sake-- About the dead bodies in your room? 1128 00:58:24,234 --> 00:58:27,638 Now, I know that you killed the maid of honor and my cameraman. 1129 00:58:27,672 --> 00:58:30,007 I've got the footage. 1130 00:58:30,040 --> 00:58:34,011 But-But I'm not here to get you guys in trouble. Okay? 1131 00:58:34,044 --> 00:58:36,180 I just-- I want to talk to you. 1132 00:58:37,848 --> 00:58:39,249 Hey. Come on in. 1133 00:58:39,283 --> 00:58:41,051 Okay-- No! Jesus. 1134 00:58:42,019 --> 00:58:44,321 Okay, wait, wait, wait. 1135 00:58:44,354 --> 00:58:45,923 Just-- Just wait. All right? 1136 00:58:45,956 --> 00:58:48,726 You've got the wrong idea. Okay? I'm not-- 1137 00:58:48,759 --> 00:58:50,160 I'm not gonna tell anyone. 1138 00:58:50,194 --> 00:58:52,529 I'm here under official capacity. 1139 00:58:52,563 --> 00:58:55,666 You know, videographer-client privilege. 1140 00:58:55,700 --> 00:59:00,037 Plus, I've not gotten any footage of you, Yvette, in that dress. 1141 00:59:00,070 --> 00:59:03,373 So back then we lived in a house with Robert and four other guys. 1142 00:59:03,407 --> 00:59:06,076 Three bedrooms. This tiny house. 1143 00:59:06,110 --> 00:59:07,712 And-- Oh. Hey, Rosemary. 1144 00:59:07,745 --> 00:59:09,714 Sorry. Have you guys seen Robert? 1145 00:59:09,747 --> 00:59:11,381 No-- I'm sorry. 1146 00:59:11,415 --> 00:59:14,118 Did you check his room? Yes. I'm going insane! 1147 00:59:15,252 --> 00:59:17,054 Dude, can you not film me right now? 1148 00:59:18,989 --> 00:59:20,457 I mean it! 1149 00:59:24,962 --> 00:59:27,331 Fuck, she's fast. 1150 00:59:28,966 --> 00:59:31,068 "Everybody makes mistakes. 1151 00:59:31,101 --> 00:59:34,404 We need to forgive and forget. 1152 00:59:35,673 --> 00:59:36,974 And forgive. 1153 00:59:37,007 --> 00:59:38,809 And forget. 1154 00:59:38,843 --> 00:59:42,412 And forgive and forget." 1155 00:59:42,446 --> 00:59:44,548 Rosemary. 1156 00:59:44,581 --> 00:59:46,951 Oh, Robert. Quick. Come with me. Where are we going? 1157 00:59:46,984 --> 00:59:49,553 Just keep up. What's wrong? Are they coming? 1158 00:59:49,586 --> 00:59:51,989 I'm not taking anyone's side. 1159 00:59:52,022 --> 00:59:54,458 I'm just saying it doesn't seem that important who Rosemary chooses as her maid of honor, 1160 00:59:54,491 --> 00:59:56,727 'cause I'm gonna spend the rest of my life in prison. 1161 00:59:56,761 --> 00:59:58,462 Don't be so dramatic! 1162 00:59:58,495 --> 01:00:01,465 And shut the door. It reeks of puke in here! 1163 01:00:05,770 --> 01:00:08,973 A bride is supposed to be stress-free on her wedding day. 1164 01:00:09,006 --> 01:00:11,742 That's why it's so very, very important to choose the right maid of honor. 1165 01:00:11,776 --> 01:00:13,177 Right, Mika? 1166 01:00:13,210 --> 01:00:16,046 Elizabeth? It's Violet. 1167 01:00:18,849 --> 01:00:20,785 Oh! Cute dog. 1168 01:00:20,818 --> 01:00:22,787 Um, have you seen Rosemary? 1169 01:00:22,820 --> 01:00:25,790 She's running around everywhere, and she's gonna get her dress all dirty. 1170 01:00:25,823 --> 01:00:27,658 Just trying to find her. 1171 01:00:27,692 --> 01:00:30,360 Shouldn't a maid of honor keep more careful track of her bride? 1172 01:00:30,394 --> 01:00:32,262 Wow. 1173 01:00:32,296 --> 01:00:35,265 So, you were a bitch to Pensee all weekend, 1174 01:00:35,299 --> 01:00:38,035 and now you're gonna be a bitch to me? 1175 01:00:38,068 --> 01:00:42,306 I'm sorry that you and Rosemary aren't best friends anymore. 1176 01:00:42,339 --> 01:00:44,174 Get over yourself. 1177 01:00:46,343 --> 01:00:48,545 You know what? 1178 01:00:48,578 --> 01:00:50,014 You're right. 1179 01:00:51,148 --> 01:00:53,350 Rosemary's in Yvette's room. 1180 01:00:53,383 --> 01:00:56,120 She told me to tell you not even to knock. 1181 01:00:56,153 --> 01:00:59,156 Just head right in. Thank you. 1182 01:00:59,189 --> 01:01:01,726 Your room smells like vomit, by the way. Ugh. 1183 01:01:16,941 --> 01:01:19,844 You did something. What did you do? 1184 01:01:25,916 --> 01:01:28,552 Just maybe toss the bangs a little bit in front. 1185 01:01:28,585 --> 01:01:30,654 Oh. Just give 'em a quick toss. Perfect. 1186 01:01:30,687 --> 01:01:32,890 Perfect! And this is all good? 1187 01:01:32,923 --> 01:01:35,092 She looks good. Yeah. First question. 1188 01:01:35,125 --> 01:01:38,095 Well, I'm not really sure that I understand the logic... 1189 01:01:38,128 --> 01:01:40,497 behind chopping the bodies up. 1190 01:01:40,530 --> 01:01:43,868 I don't really think I get what that accomplishes. 1191 01:01:45,770 --> 01:01:49,506 Yvette says the cops'll think the Mexican cartel did it. 1192 01:01:49,539 --> 01:01:52,109 Well, yeah, that's what they-- 1193 01:01:52,142 --> 01:01:55,880 That's what they do to their victims, you know, to send a message. Right? 1194 01:01:55,913 --> 01:01:58,215 Oh, right. Chop, chop, chop. 1195 01:01:58,248 --> 01:02:02,286 But you guys have never thought about burning the bodies, you know? 1196 01:02:02,319 --> 01:02:04,021 Destroy the evidence? 1197 01:02:04,054 --> 01:02:05,255 Oh. Rosemary! 1198 01:02:05,289 --> 01:02:07,892 Your maid of honor coming through! 1199 01:02:07,925 --> 01:02:09,760 Shh-shh-shh. 1200 01:02:09,794 --> 01:02:12,529 I'm not trying to have the perfect wedding. 1201 01:02:12,562 --> 01:02:14,531 It's just-- Look, I don't-- 1202 01:02:14,564 --> 01:02:17,267 It's like you've been a zombie all day. 1203 01:02:17,301 --> 01:02:19,870 I don't get it. Is this a hangover? 1204 01:02:19,904 --> 01:02:22,973 Did something happen last night? Did you get a hooker? 1205 01:02:23,007 --> 01:02:24,408 No. That was a joke. 1206 01:02:25,742 --> 01:02:29,947 There... is a very simple explanation... 1207 01:02:29,980 --> 01:02:31,448 for all of this. 1208 01:02:33,283 --> 01:02:35,953 I'll get the ax. 1209 01:02:35,986 --> 01:02:40,024 Oh, Hank, wait. We-- We made a promise to Robbie. Remember? 1210 01:02:41,591 --> 01:02:43,928 Oh-- You okay? Okay. 1211 01:02:43,961 --> 01:02:46,563 I don't even know where you would get a hooker out here. 1212 01:02:46,596 --> 01:02:48,933 No, it's nothing like that. Then what is it? 1213 01:02:48,966 --> 01:02:51,768 Baby, you're freaking me out. Just talk to me. 1214 01:02:51,802 --> 01:02:53,670 Okay. 1215 01:02:53,703 --> 01:02:55,572 Okay. 1216 01:02:55,605 --> 01:02:56,974 Oh, God. 1217 01:02:59,977 --> 01:03:01,645 It's the wedding. 1218 01:03:03,180 --> 01:03:06,150 I'm just worried it's not gonna be perfect... 1219 01:03:06,183 --> 01:03:07,918 and something's gonna go wrong. 1220 01:03:07,952 --> 01:03:10,921 That's it? Yeah. 1221 01:03:10,955 --> 01:03:14,458 Baby, that's not your job. That's not your job to worry about those things. 1222 01:03:14,491 --> 01:03:16,693 That's why we have our families here. 1223 01:03:19,163 --> 01:03:22,366 Violet, honey, you-- you want Robert and Rosemary... 1224 01:03:22,399 --> 01:03:24,835 to be happy, don't you? 1225 01:03:24,869 --> 01:03:26,670 Yes. Okay. 1226 01:03:26,703 --> 01:03:29,539 Well, we've had... 1227 01:03:29,573 --> 01:03:31,808 some accidents, um-- 1228 01:03:31,842 --> 01:03:35,880 And we'll tell everyone all about it, but later. 1229 01:03:35,913 --> 01:03:38,048 Even if the wedding sucks, 1230 01:03:38,082 --> 01:03:41,385 or-- or Marvin interrupts us with dubstep... 1231 01:03:41,418 --> 01:03:44,788 or your mother causes an inevitable scene-- 1232 01:03:44,821 --> 01:03:47,024 Everything we're doing... 1233 01:03:47,057 --> 01:03:49,226 is out of love. 1234 01:03:49,259 --> 01:03:52,096 It'll still be a success if, at the end of the day, we end up married. 1235 01:03:59,603 --> 01:04:03,173 You wouldn't want to spoil everything for her. 1236 01:04:03,207 --> 01:04:04,808 Would you? 1237 01:04:04,841 --> 01:04:07,044 So I think... 1238 01:04:07,077 --> 01:04:10,314 we can count on you keeping a secret. 1239 01:04:10,347 --> 01:04:12,983 Right? 1240 01:04:13,017 --> 01:04:15,252 What have you been doing, specifically? 1241 01:04:18,055 --> 01:04:19,990 I-- 1242 01:04:20,024 --> 01:04:21,291 I was, uh-- 1243 01:04:25,762 --> 01:04:27,231 Hello? 1244 01:04:27,264 --> 01:04:30,300 I've been working on my vows. 1245 01:04:31,101 --> 01:04:33,570 You what? Yeah. 1246 01:04:33,603 --> 01:04:36,240 You told me you finished those weeks ago. 1247 01:04:36,273 --> 01:04:38,275 Seriously. 1248 01:04:38,308 --> 01:04:40,277 I'm rewriting them. Goddamn it, Robert. 1249 01:04:40,310 --> 01:04:43,180 I'm adding to them. I'm embellishing. Yeah, right. 1250 01:04:48,552 --> 01:04:50,387 Jailbreak! 1251 01:04:50,420 --> 01:04:52,256 We got a runner! 1252 01:04:52,289 --> 01:04:54,624 Oh-- 1253 01:04:56,060 --> 01:04:58,395 Oh! 1254 01:05:15,012 --> 01:05:16,981 Here we are. 1255 01:05:17,014 --> 01:05:20,250 Here we are. 1256 01:05:20,284 --> 01:05:21,785 Violet. 1257 01:05:21,818 --> 01:05:24,921 See anything interesting lately or anything? 1258 01:05:24,955 --> 01:05:27,057 You can't even write your vows. 1259 01:05:27,091 --> 01:05:29,960 How hard is it gonna be to just say that you wanna be with me, Robert? 1260 01:05:29,994 --> 01:05:32,462 I do! Are you kidding? You're not ready to get married. I knew it. 1261 01:05:32,496 --> 01:05:34,264 No! That's all I want. 1262 01:05:34,298 --> 01:05:36,500 So-- 1263 01:05:36,533 --> 01:05:39,103 Why is everyone being so mysterious? 1264 01:05:39,136 --> 01:05:41,238 It's a surprise! 1265 01:05:41,271 --> 01:05:44,474 You little limey! 1266 01:05:44,508 --> 01:05:47,777 If it was up to me, you and I would run off right now. Okay? 1267 01:05:47,811 --> 01:05:52,149 We'd get the hell out of here, leave our families behind and elope in Vegas or something. 1268 01:05:52,182 --> 01:05:54,351 Let's do that. Come on! 1269 01:05:54,384 --> 01:05:56,453 The reception! The reception. 1270 01:05:57,221 --> 01:05:59,456 I love surprises. 1271 01:05:59,489 --> 01:06:02,126 Everybody wins. She knows too. 1272 01:06:02,159 --> 01:06:03,760 Are you sure she can be trusted? 1273 01:06:03,793 --> 01:06:05,829 Not in the slightest. Don't let her out of your sight. 1274 01:06:13,303 --> 01:06:15,872 What? Come on. Let's run away. You and me, right now! 1275 01:06:15,905 --> 01:06:18,775 No, no, no! Come on! What about our families? 1276 01:06:18,808 --> 01:06:20,877 Who cares about them? They're gonna be fine-- 1277 01:06:20,910 --> 01:06:22,779 Oh, my God! What? 1278 01:06:22,812 --> 01:06:25,049 What? Mmm. 1279 01:06:29,753 --> 01:06:32,689 Oh, God. Whoa! Yeah. 1280 01:06:32,722 --> 01:06:35,359 Let's do it. Let's fucking elope. 1281 01:06:35,392 --> 01:06:37,894 Robert. Robert, I just said let's elope! 1282 01:06:37,927 --> 01:06:39,796 At the ceremony! I'll be there! 1283 01:06:39,829 --> 01:06:43,233 What the fuck is going on around here today? 1284 01:06:45,502 --> 01:06:47,537 Oww! Oww. 1285 01:06:53,043 --> 01:06:54,878 Marvin! Marvin, wait up! 1286 01:06:54,911 --> 01:06:57,147 Wait up. You let him go? 1287 01:06:57,181 --> 01:06:58,715 Uh, he outwitted me. 1288 01:07:00,384 --> 01:07:05,555 But don't worry. I injected a tracking device into his buttocks. 1289 01:07:21,405 --> 01:07:23,640 Where in the hell is that boy? 1290 01:07:27,644 --> 01:07:30,080 Everyone, just calm down. 1291 01:07:30,114 --> 01:07:33,950 I'll go and, you know, poke around for him. 1292 01:07:33,983 --> 01:07:35,619 Please. 1293 01:07:35,652 --> 01:07:39,289 You can't be marrying somebody like that. They're just beneath us. 1294 01:07:41,725 --> 01:07:44,861 - Okay, we're all standing under the same sun, so-- - Yeah, yeah. Moving on. 1295 01:07:44,894 --> 01:07:46,096 We're hot too. Let me know. 1296 01:07:46,130 --> 01:07:47,231 We'll keep you posted. 1297 01:07:47,264 --> 01:07:49,933 Jesus. The natives are getting restless, man. 1298 01:07:49,966 --> 01:07:53,470 What is going on in there? Everybody's acting really weird. 1299 01:07:53,503 --> 01:07:55,639 Ted! Get your head in the game. 1300 01:08:21,198 --> 01:08:23,967 He's coming back this way! 1301 01:08:24,000 --> 01:08:26,503 Ooh! Ooh! Flank him! Flank him! 1302 01:08:26,536 --> 01:08:29,439 Oh! Oh! Oh! Hang on! 1303 01:08:29,473 --> 01:08:31,475 Fine! 1304 01:08:31,508 --> 01:08:35,312 - Ohh! - No! Fine! I yield! 1305 01:08:35,345 --> 01:08:37,247 - Ah! - I said I yield! 1306 01:08:37,281 --> 01:08:40,116 Okay, okay. Cheap shot. Cheap shot. 1307 01:08:40,150 --> 01:08:42,085 You people are insane! 1308 01:08:42,118 --> 01:08:44,421 I'm not the one trying to steal another man's wife! 1309 01:08:44,454 --> 01:08:47,157 She's not even your wife yet! 1310 01:08:47,191 --> 01:08:50,660 I should have married her when I had the chance. 1311 01:08:50,694 --> 01:08:53,963 If you liked it, you should've put a ring on it! 1312 01:08:56,300 --> 01:08:59,369 You-- You can't keep me prisoner forever. 1313 01:08:59,403 --> 01:09:01,705 Yeah, we can. 1314 01:09:01,738 --> 01:09:06,543 What do you think Rosemary's gonna say when she finds out that you abducted me... 1315 01:09:06,576 --> 01:09:09,279 and subjected me to torture? 1316 01:09:10,914 --> 01:09:13,650 All right, here's what we're gonna do. 1317 01:09:13,683 --> 01:09:15,652 Marvin, here's what we're gonna do. 1318 01:09:15,685 --> 01:09:18,788 You're going to take him to the house. Okay? 1319 01:09:18,822 --> 01:09:21,691 And then you get all your shit, all right? 1320 01:09:21,725 --> 01:09:25,862 And then you leave, right now, and you never contact Rosemary ever again. 1321 01:09:25,895 --> 01:09:28,865 Oh, well, let me think about that for a second. 1322 01:09:28,898 --> 01:09:31,167 Uh, no. I'm sorry. Not gonna do that. 1323 01:09:31,201 --> 01:09:33,403 - Okay. - I'll never let her go! 1324 01:09:33,437 --> 01:09:35,305 Oh, really? Yes! Never, never! 1325 01:09:35,339 --> 01:09:36,706 Marvin? 1326 01:09:50,587 --> 01:09:52,956 What-- You got a little blood. 1327 01:09:54,958 --> 01:09:57,193 You might wanna soak that. 1328 01:09:59,929 --> 01:10:02,766 What-- I'll take care of the body. 1329 01:10:02,799 --> 01:10:05,068 Just worry about getting cleaned up and... 1330 01:10:05,101 --> 01:10:07,271 not being late for your own wedding. 1331 01:10:08,272 --> 01:10:10,073 Why'd you-- 1332 01:10:10,106 --> 01:10:11,608 Why? 1333 01:10:11,641 --> 01:10:14,411 Why did y-- Why'd you do that? 1334 01:10:15,645 --> 01:10:18,181 You asked me to. 1335 01:10:18,214 --> 01:10:22,252 No, I thought you'd intimidate-- 1336 01:10:22,286 --> 01:10:24,454 Thought you'd just intimidate him. 1337 01:10:24,488 --> 01:10:26,590 He was a loose end. 1338 01:10:26,623 --> 01:10:30,360 You don't want this douche bird-doggin' you the rest of your life. Come on! 1339 01:10:30,394 --> 01:10:32,762 It's time for you to go get married. 1340 01:10:34,063 --> 01:10:37,934 Go forward without fear, 1341 01:10:37,967 --> 01:10:39,469 brave soldier. 1342 01:10:42,639 --> 01:10:44,541 Go on. 1343 01:10:52,349 --> 01:10:55,652 How do you feel about losing her to another man? 1344 01:10:55,685 --> 01:10:59,456 Well, uh, I certainly wasn't going to lose her to another woman. 1345 01:10:59,489 --> 01:11:02,892 I mean, all you can do is take these things with grace. 1346 01:11:02,926 --> 01:11:05,562 You're so graceful. 1347 01:11:05,595 --> 01:11:08,932 I just love when family is around. 1348 01:11:10,033 --> 01:11:12,135 It just think that it's-- 1349 01:11:12,168 --> 01:11:14,571 It's okay. That's-- 1350 01:11:14,604 --> 01:11:17,974 It's so cool to be around people that are real... 1351 01:11:18,007 --> 01:11:21,277 and that are not trying to shoot you. 1352 01:11:26,883 --> 01:11:28,985 I do hope Robert's not bothering too much-- 1353 01:11:29,018 --> 01:11:31,120 the unfortunate events that happened. 1354 01:11:31,154 --> 01:11:33,256 Robert. Oh, there he is. 1355 01:11:33,289 --> 01:11:35,625 Robert! What happened? 1356 01:11:35,659 --> 01:11:38,628 Honey, are you-- are you okay? 1357 01:11:38,662 --> 01:11:40,464 Mommy's got everything covered. 1358 01:11:40,497 --> 01:11:43,266 The wedding is about to start. 1359 01:11:43,299 --> 01:11:47,504 Excuse me! E-Excuse me. Can I have your attention? Hello? 1360 01:11:47,537 --> 01:11:52,809 Hi. Uh, listen, uh, we're running a little late, um-- 1361 01:11:52,842 --> 01:11:55,044 You always loved getting dirty. 1362 01:11:55,078 --> 01:11:58,247 But you clean up so nice. 1363 01:11:59,649 --> 01:12:01,818 I-I'm a terrible person, Mom. 1364 01:12:01,851 --> 01:12:03,553 What? 1365 01:12:03,587 --> 01:12:06,456 Robbie, no. Why would you even say that? 1366 01:12:06,490 --> 01:12:08,358 'Cause Pensee's dead. 1367 01:12:08,392 --> 01:12:10,460 Look at her. 1368 01:12:10,494 --> 01:12:14,030 Robert, you had nothing to do with that. I shot her in the face. 1369 01:12:14,063 --> 01:12:16,666 And this guy, I don't even know-- 1370 01:12:16,700 --> 01:12:20,404 Look, Robert, honey-- What happened to this guy? 1371 01:12:20,437 --> 01:12:23,507 I will take all the responsibility. 1372 01:12:23,540 --> 01:12:27,877 There's no point ruining your life because of your father and me. 1373 01:12:27,911 --> 01:12:30,914 Do you remember the story of the Giving Tree? 1374 01:12:30,947 --> 01:12:32,482 The kids' book? 1375 01:12:32,516 --> 01:12:35,018 It was about a little boy... 1376 01:12:35,051 --> 01:12:36,586 and his tree. 1377 01:12:36,620 --> 01:12:38,154 Then one day... 1378 01:12:38,187 --> 01:12:39,756 the boy grows up... 1379 01:12:39,789 --> 01:12:42,058 and he falls in love with a girl, 1380 01:12:42,091 --> 01:12:44,227 and he wants a house. 1381 01:12:44,260 --> 01:12:48,197 So the tree tells him to cut her down... 1382 01:12:48,231 --> 01:12:50,400 so that he can build the house. 1383 01:12:51,468 --> 01:12:55,104 Did the tree kill people, Mom? 1384 01:12:55,138 --> 01:12:58,174 That's a different story, Son. 1385 01:12:58,207 --> 01:13:00,109 Honey, do you love Rosemary? 1386 01:13:00,143 --> 01:13:03,046 Yes. What-- Of course I do. It's-- 1387 01:13:03,079 --> 01:13:06,015 Do you want to break her heart? No, Ma! 1388 01:13:06,049 --> 01:13:10,186 Well, you're going to break her heart if you don't go out there and marry her. 1389 01:13:10,219 --> 01:13:13,222 That, Robbie-- That is your future. 1390 01:13:13,256 --> 01:13:16,392 I just don't get it. 1391 01:13:16,426 --> 01:13:19,162 I don't get it. It's like he's acting crazy. 1392 01:13:20,797 --> 01:13:23,032 Sometimes men... 1393 01:13:23,066 --> 01:13:26,102 just need to work things out on their own. 1394 01:13:27,504 --> 01:13:30,474 Maybe he went looking for Pensee. 1395 01:13:30,507 --> 01:13:32,275 What? 1396 01:13:35,111 --> 01:13:37,481 I am going to wring his little neck. 1397 01:13:37,514 --> 01:13:39,749 No one makes a fool out of Flip Milton. No one. 1398 01:13:44,754 --> 01:13:47,123 Yeah, okay. Perfect. 1399 01:13:54,998 --> 01:13:56,966 I'll fucking break his neck! 1400 01:13:57,000 --> 01:13:59,135 Control yourself, Philip. 1401 01:13:59,168 --> 01:14:01,671 Did you find Robert? 1402 01:14:01,705 --> 01:14:05,975 Uh, y-yes. He spilled, like, a cocktail sauce all over the front of his shirt. 1403 01:14:06,009 --> 01:14:09,012 He had to go change, but he's gonna be right down. Oh! 1404 01:14:09,045 --> 01:14:10,647 Nobody worry. 1405 01:14:10,680 --> 01:14:12,582 Uh-huh. Yeah. 1406 01:14:12,616 --> 01:14:15,785 - You get some good stuff? - Golden stuff. 1407 01:14:15,819 --> 01:14:18,622 Golden nuggets of good stuff. 1408 01:14:18,655 --> 01:14:21,357 - White people are crazy. - Fuck, yes. 1409 01:14:21,390 --> 01:14:23,760 - They are fucking retarded. - Really, man. 1410 01:14:23,793 --> 01:14:25,294 - I'm scared. - No, I know. 1411 01:14:25,328 --> 01:14:27,864 - I'm scared. - I'm scared, and I'm the whitest guy here. 1412 01:14:27,897 --> 01:14:31,034 - I'm scared, and I'm the blackest guy here. - You are, seriously, 1413 01:14:31,067 --> 01:14:33,036 the blackest g-- You're the only black guy here. 1414 01:14:33,069 --> 01:14:35,605 - I know. - You've noticed. Cool. 1415 01:14:35,639 --> 01:14:37,774 Nothing we can't fix. 1416 01:14:37,807 --> 01:14:39,876 Violet, can I speak with you for a minute? 1417 01:14:39,909 --> 01:14:42,579 I have a question for the maid of honor. That's your area, right? 1418 01:14:48,852 --> 01:14:51,921 - What do you want? - Is there something you want to tell people? 1419 01:14:53,690 --> 01:14:55,725 Tell people? 1420 01:14:55,759 --> 01:14:58,294 No. 1421 01:14:58,327 --> 01:15:00,496 No. 1422 01:15:00,530 --> 01:15:02,699 She has been my best friend... 1423 01:15:02,732 --> 01:15:05,034 since second grade. 1424 01:15:06,235 --> 01:15:09,472 I was there for her for freshman 15. 1425 01:15:09,505 --> 01:15:11,074 Okay? 1426 01:15:11,107 --> 01:15:14,578 I was there for her first period. 1427 01:15:14,611 --> 01:15:17,480 She was my best friend! 1428 01:15:17,513 --> 01:15:20,249 Don't you understand that? 1429 01:15:20,283 --> 01:15:24,020 She's my best friend! I'm supposed to be the maid of honor! 1430 01:15:24,053 --> 01:15:27,390 You pig! 1431 01:15:27,423 --> 01:15:31,127 Die! 1432 01:15:40,269 --> 01:15:42,505 Have you seen my wife? 1433 01:15:42,538 --> 01:15:44,507 Elizabeth? 1434 01:15:44,540 --> 01:15:46,442 I'll be right there! 1435 01:15:46,475 --> 01:15:48,111 Oh, shit. 1436 01:15:48,144 --> 01:15:50,346 Just pretend I'm not here. 1437 01:15:50,379 --> 01:15:53,116 Ted, quick! Kill him! 1438 01:15:53,149 --> 01:15:55,551 What? Why? Why are we killing him? 1439 01:15:55,585 --> 01:15:57,787 No, now, wait a second. I mean-- 1440 01:15:57,821 --> 01:16:01,390 Don't. Ted. You're a good man. Listen to your heart. Don't fight me. 1441 01:16:01,424 --> 01:16:04,794 Get those idiots Neil and Cooper to get the audience started to seat. 1442 01:16:06,596 --> 01:16:09,065 What the hell is going on? 1443 01:16:09,098 --> 01:16:12,468 Uh-- Nothing. Just-- Just, uh, 1444 01:16:12,501 --> 01:16:15,772 gettin' some sweet B-roll footage, that's all. 1445 01:16:15,805 --> 01:16:17,140 Everything's cool, right? 1446 01:16:17,173 --> 01:16:18,407 Yeah. Right. Everything's cool. 1447 01:16:18,441 --> 01:16:20,644 Judge. 1448 01:16:20,677 --> 01:16:23,479 I'm afraid I have some really bad news. 1449 01:16:23,512 --> 01:16:25,381 Violet left. 1450 01:16:25,414 --> 01:16:27,917 I think she got a call from Pensee, 1451 01:16:27,951 --> 01:16:29,485 and now they're partying together. 1452 01:16:29,518 --> 01:16:32,455 She was swearing a lot when she left. - Oh, Jesus. 1453 01:16:32,488 --> 01:16:34,958 Elizabeth, the judge is going to bring everyone in the bridal party... 1454 01:16:34,991 --> 01:16:36,492 back to that room. 1455 01:16:36,525 --> 01:16:39,295 I don't know what the hell is going on around here. 1456 01:16:39,328 --> 01:16:40,964 Is there anyone else who wants to leave? 1457 01:16:40,997 --> 01:16:43,767 Because I sure as hell do. 1458 01:16:45,334 --> 01:16:47,904 You did it just to be maid of honor? 1459 01:16:47,937 --> 01:16:51,007 Well, she just could not be trusted. 1460 01:16:51,040 --> 01:16:53,109 What has happened to you? 1461 01:16:53,142 --> 01:16:55,645 Oh, just shut up and help me. 1462 01:16:57,513 --> 01:16:59,683 I know. It's okay. 1463 01:16:59,716 --> 01:17:01,617 Loving it? Yep. 1464 01:17:01,651 --> 01:17:03,619 It's not my actual-- 1465 01:17:03,653 --> 01:17:05,488 This is so exciting! 1466 01:17:05,521 --> 01:17:08,992 I just hope that Robert's actually coming this time. 1467 01:17:09,025 --> 01:17:10,326 This way. 1468 01:17:12,228 --> 01:17:13,797 Ohh! 1469 01:17:15,198 --> 01:17:18,501 Oh, what a beautiful spread! 1470 01:17:20,236 --> 01:17:21,604 The pink is cute. 1471 01:17:21,637 --> 01:17:23,740 Mmm! 1472 01:17:39,555 --> 01:17:41,390 There you are. Come on. Let's get you to your place. 1473 01:17:41,424 --> 01:17:43,392 Where's Rosemary? I need to talk to her. 1474 01:17:43,426 --> 01:17:45,829 You'd better not be breaking her heart. I gotta talk to her! 1475 01:17:45,862 --> 01:17:48,698 Oh, fuck. I wish we would start this wedding. She's in here. 1476 01:17:48,732 --> 01:17:50,399 Potty mouth! 1477 01:17:50,433 --> 01:17:53,169 - Here he is, everyone! - Honey. Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. 1478 01:17:53,202 --> 01:17:55,404 I'm so sorry. Where have you been? 1479 01:17:55,438 --> 01:17:59,342 Look, I've been around. I've been here. I'm so sorry. I need you to know I screwed up. 1480 01:17:59,375 --> 01:18:01,544 What did you do? It doesn't matter. 1481 01:18:01,577 --> 01:18:05,214 What's important is that I love you and I want to marry you right now. Come on! Let's go! 1482 01:18:06,249 --> 01:18:08,985 Oh, my God! 1483 01:18:11,054 --> 01:18:13,723 - Oh, my God. - Oh, my God! 1484 01:18:13,757 --> 01:18:16,525 - Oh, my God! It's Violet! - Are you fucking kidding me? 1485 01:18:16,559 --> 01:18:18,694 Why is her face like that? 1486 01:18:18,728 --> 01:18:20,529 All over the floor! 1487 01:18:20,563 --> 01:18:22,398 We can get the floors done, honey. 1488 01:18:24,367 --> 01:18:26,002 Did that sound like screams? 1489 01:18:26,035 --> 01:18:28,437 It's probably fine. 1490 01:18:28,471 --> 01:18:29,939 Oh. 1491 01:18:32,141 --> 01:18:34,277 This is good. Mmm. 1492 01:18:35,544 --> 01:18:37,080 Oh, shit. My tux. 1493 01:18:37,113 --> 01:18:38,948 * You'll never be alone 1494 01:18:38,982 --> 01:18:42,085 * You'll never be alone tonight * 1495 01:18:42,118 --> 01:18:44,788 Oh, my God! Violet's dead! 1496 01:18:44,821 --> 01:18:47,123 It must have been an accident. Or a suicide. 1497 01:18:47,156 --> 01:18:49,258 Clearly she was murdered. 1498 01:18:49,292 --> 01:18:51,527 Christ. Honey, give me my phone. 1499 01:18:51,560 --> 01:18:54,798 No, no, no. You don't need to call the police. I did it. 1500 01:18:54,831 --> 01:18:57,633 - I killed her. - Mom, no, no. 1501 01:18:57,666 --> 01:19:02,138 I-I did it to keep the wedding perfect for my little boy and for you, Rosemary. 1502 01:19:02,171 --> 01:19:06,109 I committed all of the murders. I'm the Giving Tree. 1503 01:19:06,142 --> 01:19:07,710 All of what murders? 1504 01:19:07,743 --> 01:19:10,613 No, no, Judge, that's not true. I killed Blaze. 1505 01:19:10,646 --> 01:19:12,748 Who? Don't listen to him! 1506 01:19:12,782 --> 01:19:16,052 I can't let you take the blame. I killed Blaze. Twice. 1507 01:19:16,085 --> 01:19:18,387 You told me you sent Blaze home. 1508 01:19:18,421 --> 01:19:22,058 Would someone please tell me what the fuck everyone is talking about? 1509 01:19:22,091 --> 01:19:24,727 And Mom didn't kill Pensee. I shot her in the face. 1510 01:19:24,760 --> 01:19:27,831 - You killed my best friend? - I'm your best friend. 1511 01:19:27,864 --> 01:19:30,299 He did not kill Pensee. I did. 1512 01:19:30,333 --> 01:19:33,469 - He's just covering for me. - Uh-- 1513 01:19:33,502 --> 01:19:36,940 Call the police. Let's just send everyone home! 1514 01:19:36,973 --> 01:19:40,109 No! They can arrest me! Then we can all have a perfect wedding. 1515 01:19:40,143 --> 01:19:41,845 Everyone just-- 1516 01:19:41,878 --> 01:19:44,113 stay calm for just a moment. 1517 01:19:44,147 --> 01:19:47,116 Now, we are not calling the police. 1518 01:19:47,150 --> 01:19:49,919 Do you have any idea how much this wedding cost? 1519 01:19:49,953 --> 01:19:52,088 - Flip-- - I am up for reelection... 1520 01:19:52,121 --> 01:19:53,789 in November, for God's sake. 1521 01:19:53,823 --> 01:19:55,859 What do you think it will look like... 1522 01:19:55,892 --> 01:19:57,593 if they discover a mass murder under my nose? 1523 01:19:57,626 --> 01:19:59,795 That prick Beaumont will bury me in scandal. 1524 01:19:59,829 --> 01:20:04,133 Don't any of you people ever think about anyone other than yourself? 1525 01:20:04,167 --> 01:20:07,370 - Daddy! - I am going to call the sheriff on his private line. 1526 01:20:07,403 --> 01:20:09,839 He owes me a favor-- a big one. 1527 01:20:09,873 --> 01:20:12,808 What are you going to do? I'm going to make this problem go away. 1528 01:20:12,842 --> 01:20:16,379 We are all gonna go out there and have a beautiful wedding. 1529 01:20:16,412 --> 01:20:21,217 Now, my boys will collect the bodies... 1530 01:20:21,250 --> 01:20:23,519 and make it look like it was a... 1531 01:20:23,552 --> 01:20:25,388 gas explosion or something. 1532 01:20:25,421 --> 01:20:28,992 You are a judge. You can't just cover up a crime. 1533 01:20:29,025 --> 01:20:30,626 Of course I can, honey. 1534 01:20:30,659 --> 01:20:33,629 It's like the time your Uncle Frank killed that prostitute. 1535 01:20:33,662 --> 01:20:36,132 Uncle Frank never killed a... prostitute. 1536 01:20:36,165 --> 01:20:38,134 Oh, my God. 1537 01:20:38,167 --> 01:20:41,537 That's right. It was that retarded gentleman that we executed for it. 1538 01:20:41,570 --> 01:20:43,372 Nice fella. Um, all right. 1539 01:20:43,406 --> 01:20:46,209 - Oh, my God. - All right, now look. 1540 01:20:46,242 --> 01:20:49,078 - The only way this is gonna work-- - You okay? 1541 01:20:49,112 --> 01:20:54,050 Is if all of us never talk about anything that happened this weekend ever again. 1542 01:20:54,083 --> 01:20:57,086 This has to go to your graves, or I'll put you there myself. 1543 01:20:57,120 --> 01:20:59,188 No, no, no. All right. 1544 01:20:59,222 --> 01:21:01,824 Now, 1545 01:21:01,857 --> 01:21:04,994 is everyone ready to take a vow of silence? 1546 01:21:05,028 --> 01:21:07,396 I am! Absolutely! 1547 01:21:07,430 --> 01:21:08,998 I am! You betcha. Yep. Yep. 1548 01:21:09,032 --> 01:21:11,734 - Yeah. - Always. 1549 01:21:11,767 --> 01:21:13,402 I love you, honey. 1550 01:21:13,436 --> 01:21:16,005 All right, knock 'em dead. 1551 01:21:16,039 --> 01:21:18,274 I'm gonna throw up on my dress. 1552 01:21:18,307 --> 01:21:20,409 That's okay. That's appropriate. 1553 01:21:20,443 --> 01:21:22,778 Wait a minute. These goddamn cameras getting all of this? 1554 01:21:22,811 --> 01:21:25,781 Pretend we're not here! 1555 01:21:25,814 --> 01:21:29,052 - Give me those tapes. - Well, we record onto hard drives. 1556 01:21:29,085 --> 01:21:32,621 - And we're gonna edit all this shit out anyway. - Bullshit. 1557 01:21:32,655 --> 01:21:35,591 - Why are the cameras still rolling then, huh? - Well, the-- 1558 01:21:35,624 --> 01:21:39,795 Grab him, Ted! Go on! Come on. Hurt him. 1559 01:21:39,828 --> 01:21:41,530 Get him! I'm trying. 1560 01:21:41,564 --> 01:21:43,599 Robert, grow a dick, will ya? Help out. 1561 01:21:43,632 --> 01:21:45,734 - Go get him. - Come on! Get him! 1562 01:21:45,768 --> 01:21:48,037 - No, no, no, no! - Get him! Get him! 1563 01:21:48,071 --> 01:21:51,274 Excuse me, sir. 1564 01:21:56,445 --> 01:21:58,481 There's not gonna be any wedding! 1565 01:22:03,152 --> 01:22:06,255 I came back to run some mash-up ideas by you, Rosemary. 1566 01:22:07,090 --> 01:22:08,591 I heard everything. 1567 01:22:08,624 --> 01:22:11,094 I heard everything! 1568 01:22:11,127 --> 01:22:16,065 We are calling the cops like men of honor! 1569 01:22:16,099 --> 01:22:17,733 I'm shocked at you, Uncle Flip. 1570 01:22:17,766 --> 01:22:19,902 Marvin, you know better than any of us... 1571 01:22:19,935 --> 01:22:21,804 sometimes killing is necessary. 1572 01:22:21,837 --> 01:22:24,773 In war! 1573 01:22:24,807 --> 01:22:29,778 Or, like, if an English dude is here to break up a wedding. But covering up mass murder? 1574 01:22:29,812 --> 01:22:32,515 You killed Declan. Don't you want to cover this up too? 1575 01:22:32,548 --> 01:22:34,517 Declan's dead? Yeah. Sorry. 1576 01:22:34,550 --> 01:22:36,152 No! 1577 01:22:36,185 --> 01:22:38,354 - I was following orders! - I-- 1578 01:22:38,387 --> 01:22:42,525 That's not a legal defense! And I never said you should shoot him. 1579 01:22:43,659 --> 01:22:45,028 You nodded. 1580 01:22:45,828 --> 01:22:48,031 Don't deny it. 1581 01:22:48,064 --> 01:22:51,300 I can't believe you lied to me. I thought you were my captain. 1582 01:22:51,334 --> 01:22:55,004 Marvin, now, trust your Uncle Flip. Give me that phone. 1583 01:22:56,505 --> 01:22:58,507 - Come on! Come on, now! Come on! - No! 1584 01:22:58,541 --> 01:23:01,944 I won't do it! 1585 01:23:01,977 --> 01:23:04,213 I am placing you all under a citizen's arrest... 1586 01:23:04,247 --> 01:23:07,216 by power of the United States Marine Corps! 1587 01:23:10,186 --> 01:23:12,155 You know what the worst part about this is? 1588 01:23:12,188 --> 01:23:16,992 Now no one is gonna get to hear my Awesome-sauce deejay set. 1589 01:23:17,026 --> 01:23:19,362 The beats were so crunchy! 1590 01:23:19,395 --> 01:23:21,130 So crunchy! 1591 01:23:21,164 --> 01:23:24,500 Stop crying! The beats were gonna be so crunchy! 1592 01:23:26,235 --> 01:23:28,571 Marvin, I was at your baptism, for God's sake. 1593 01:23:28,604 --> 01:23:30,206 Come on now. 1594 01:23:33,376 --> 01:23:36,212 - He's a big one! - Pull! 1595 01:23:36,245 --> 01:23:38,181 Pull! 1596 01:23:41,184 --> 01:23:44,153 Down, everybody! Oh, my God! 1597 01:23:44,187 --> 01:23:46,755 - Oh, my God. - Go on! Get out! 1598 01:23:46,789 --> 01:23:49,158 Get out! Reload! Reload! 1599 01:23:49,192 --> 01:23:51,827 He's out of bullets! Just keep hanging on! 1600 01:23:51,860 --> 01:23:54,730 No, he's got more bullets. Oh, no! No! No reloading! 1601 01:23:56,199 --> 01:23:57,500 No! Marvin, stop! 1602 01:24:15,718 --> 01:24:18,921 Awesome-sauce. 1603 01:24:36,805 --> 01:24:40,709 Hey, is everything okay in there? 1604 01:24:40,743 --> 01:24:42,911 We're fine. Fine. 1605 01:24:42,945 --> 01:24:46,215 I-I can't see. All of us. Aren't we? 1606 01:24:46,249 --> 01:24:49,285 Okay, everybody. We're putting on a big show here. Okay? 1607 01:24:49,318 --> 01:24:50,986 Game face. 1608 01:24:51,019 --> 01:24:52,488 Remember your vows. 1609 01:24:52,521 --> 01:24:54,290 Honey, get started. 1610 01:24:54,323 --> 01:24:56,659 Cameraman, you gonna film this? 1611 01:24:56,692 --> 01:24:58,927 That's what I'm here to do. Good. 1612 01:24:58,961 --> 01:25:02,131 Well, we'll talk later about all that other stuff. 1613 01:25:02,165 --> 01:25:04,133 I suppose you're gonna want a bonus. 1614 01:25:04,167 --> 01:25:07,136 Sit with me out there. Oh, of course, sweetie. 1615 01:25:07,170 --> 01:25:09,138 I am the maid of honor! 1616 01:25:09,172 --> 01:25:11,240 I'm so happy right now. 1617 01:25:11,274 --> 01:25:14,443 Rosemary and I together, we're like a fairy tale. 1618 01:25:14,477 --> 01:25:16,078 Thank you. 1619 01:25:16,111 --> 01:25:17,746 Let's do this. 1620 01:25:17,780 --> 01:25:19,648 Are you ready? Yeah. 1621 01:25:19,682 --> 01:25:22,418 You still have a little cocktail sauce on your shirt. No, don't. That's blood. 1622 01:25:22,451 --> 01:25:23,986 Gross. Oh. 1623 01:25:24,019 --> 01:25:27,490 Hey, I think I thought of the perfect vow. 1624 01:25:27,523 --> 01:25:30,859 As long as we live, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, 1625 01:25:30,893 --> 01:25:34,163 I will never let anything like this happen ever again. 1626 01:25:34,197 --> 01:25:36,432 You do? I do. 1627 01:25:36,465 --> 01:25:38,667 I do too. 1628 01:25:38,701 --> 01:25:41,003 Okay? See you out there. Mm-hmm. 1629 01:25:42,471 --> 01:25:44,173 Sweetheart? 1630 01:25:46,074 --> 01:25:48,277 Things got a little messy, huh? 1631 01:25:48,311 --> 01:25:51,046 Sometimes to have a good life, 1632 01:25:51,079 --> 01:25:53,816 you have to do bad things. 1633 01:25:53,849 --> 01:25:55,484 Do you understand? 1634 01:25:57,353 --> 01:25:58,721 Smart girl. 1635 01:26:00,223 --> 01:26:02,225 I'm proud of you. 1636 01:26:05,060 --> 01:26:08,764 You ready for the biggest adventure of your life? 1637 01:26:10,766 --> 01:26:12,167 Okay. 1638 01:26:13,035 --> 01:26:14,503 * Come with me 1639 01:26:14,537 --> 01:26:19,242 * And you'll see where you belong * 1640 01:26:21,377 --> 01:26:25,548 You must have something to say about your wedding. 1641 01:26:25,581 --> 01:26:27,616 Robert, are you okay? Robert. 1642 01:26:29,184 --> 01:26:30,653 Robert. Robert! 1643 01:26:30,686 --> 01:26:32,421 Hey! What are you doing, husband? 1644 01:26:32,455 --> 01:26:36,592 I-- I-- I just wanted to say a little something for the video. 1645 01:26:36,625 --> 01:26:39,061 Uh, really? 1646 01:26:39,094 --> 01:26:42,231 We are all very excited... 1647 01:26:42,265 --> 01:26:46,769 to have finally tied the knot with Robert's family. 1648 01:26:46,802 --> 01:26:48,571 We are one family now. 1649 01:26:48,604 --> 01:26:51,774 We know how to get things done. 1650 01:26:52,608 --> 01:26:54,243 Today's adventure... 1651 01:26:54,277 --> 01:26:57,212 creates a bond not only between Rosemary and Robert, 1652 01:26:57,246 --> 01:27:01,517 but... between all of us here today. 1653 01:27:01,550 --> 01:27:03,886 Good sex, bad sex. 1654 01:27:03,919 --> 01:27:06,121 Any marriage will have both of them. 1655 01:27:06,154 --> 01:27:08,891 The key to a good marriage is trust. 1656 01:27:10,993 --> 01:27:15,130 The real key... is love for your children. 1657 01:27:15,163 --> 01:27:18,066 Any thoughts for the future? 1658 01:27:19,668 --> 01:27:22,237 And when Robert and Rosemary, 1659 01:27:22,271 --> 01:27:24,239 God willing, 1660 01:27:24,273 --> 01:27:26,609 give us some grandchildren-- 1661 01:27:28,744 --> 01:27:31,146 What did she say? 1662 01:27:31,179 --> 01:27:33,181 We're done with cameras for now. 1663 01:27:34,817 --> 01:27:37,653 I know for a fact... 1664 01:27:37,686 --> 01:27:42,024 they will do whatever they need to do to give them a good life. 1665 01:29:26,729 --> 01:29:29,698 Unpleasant news today from Pleasant Valley. 1666 01:29:29,732 --> 01:29:32,935 Six bodies were found mutilated and burned. 1667 01:29:32,968 --> 01:29:35,938 They were discovered near where the victims had been abducted... 1668 01:29:35,971 --> 01:29:39,508 from a wedding taking place at a well-known family's vacation home. 1669 01:29:39,542 --> 01:29:44,246 Four-term state judge Philip "Flip" Milton, 1670 01:29:44,279 --> 01:29:45,881 who escaped unharmed. 1671 01:29:45,914 --> 01:29:47,850 Here's what he had to say. 1672 01:29:47,883 --> 01:29:52,054 - Judge! Judge! - My family and I are deeply, deeply saddened... 1673 01:29:52,087 --> 01:29:54,557 by the death of our dear friends. 1674 01:29:54,590 --> 01:29:59,094 I am suspending all political campaign activity effective immediately, 1675 01:29:59,127 --> 01:30:01,630 although I remain in the race. 1676 01:30:01,664 --> 01:30:06,234 But now is not the time for politics. That's all for now. 1677 01:30:06,268 --> 01:30:08,103 Reporter Pamela White... 1678 01:30:08,136 --> 01:30:12,407 is live from the Pleasant Valley Sheriff's Department with updates. 1679 01:30:12,441 --> 01:30:14,610 Pamela. 1680 01:30:14,643 --> 01:30:16,278 Early reports indicate... 1681 01:30:16,311 --> 01:30:18,280 that these seemingly senseless murders... 1682 01:30:18,313 --> 01:30:20,282 have been committed by a satanic cult... 1683 01:30:20,315 --> 01:30:24,419 which has been operating in this county in secret for some time. 1684 01:30:24,453 --> 01:30:27,490 And the police's primary suspect for the cult's ringleader? 1685 01:30:27,523 --> 01:30:29,424 Wait till you hear this. 1686 01:30:29,458 --> 01:30:31,393 Charles Beaumont, 1687 01:30:31,426 --> 01:30:35,297 who, interestingly, is Judge Flip Milton's highest-polling challenger... 1688 01:30:35,330 --> 01:30:36,999 in November's election. 1689 01:30:37,032 --> 01:30:39,902 What should have been an unforgettable day in one girl's life-- 1690 01:30:39,935 --> 01:30:42,170 her wedding day-- 1691 01:30:42,204 --> 01:30:46,809 will now be remembered as one of the most tragic events in Pleasant Valley history. 1692 01:30:46,842 --> 01:30:48,777 Back to you, Wood. 1693 01:30:48,811 --> 01:30:52,347 A shocking and sad picture coming out of Pleasant Valley. 1694 01:30:52,380 --> 01:30:56,351 We'll have more on that story as it develops. 1695 01:30:56,384 --> 01:30:59,354 Shifting gears-- Planning a wedding in this day and age... 1696 01:30:59,387 --> 01:31:02,024 can be perilous and fraught with disaster. 1697 01:31:02,057 --> 01:31:04,259 After the break, we'll be back with tips on avoiding... 1698 01:31:04,292 --> 01:31:06,294 the 10 biggest in-- Ah, fuck me. 120263

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