All language subtitles for Deuce.Bigalow.Male.Gigolo.1999.1080p.WEBRip.x265-RARBG-English

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified) Download
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional) Download
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch Download
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek Download
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean Download
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay Download
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese Download
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:14,730 --> 00:00:18,705 * OF ALL THE WONDERFUL THINGS IN LIFE YOU CAN FIND * 2 00:00:18,738 --> 00:00:21,811 * THEY ALL CAN BE YOURS WITH THE RIGHT FRAME OF MIND * 3 00:00:21,844 --> 00:00:25,252 * JUST LOOK, AND YOU'LL FIND 4 00:00:25,285 --> 00:00:28,691 * THERE ARE NO SECRETS TO HIDE 5 00:00:28,725 --> 00:00:32,266 * LEAVE YOUR PROBLEMS BEHIND LEAVE YOUR PROBLEMS BEHIND * 6 00:00:32,299 --> 00:00:35,305 * NO WORRY, FRIENDS NO WORRY ** 7 00:00:45,225 --> 00:00:48,531 [ People Murmuring ] [ Man ] YUCK ! 8 00:00:48,565 --> 00:00:50,602 EWW ! 9 00:00:50,635 --> 00:00:51,103 SWIM TRUNKS ARE LOADED WITH DETERGENTS AND OTHER HAZARDOUS CHEMICALS HARMFUL TO FISH. 10 00:00:54,510 --> 00:00:56,347 OW ! AAH ! 11 00:01:19,927 --> 00:01:21,664 OH ! 12 00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:41,504 HI, ALLISON. 13 00:01:46,614 --> 00:01:50,255 SCRUBBED MY JOB AT THE AQUARIUM. HEARD YOU GOT FIRED. 14 00:01:50,289 --> 00:01:54,597 YEAH. THE AQUARIUM'S TOTALLY CHANGED. DON'T WORRY ABOUT ME. I'LL BE FINE. 15 00:01:54,630 --> 00:01:57,034 I GOT A LOT OF GREAT OFFERS. 16 00:01:57,067 --> 00:01:58,871 THINGS ARE REALLY STARTING TO HAPPEN FOR ME. 17 00:01:58,905 --> 00:02:01,911 I WAS THINKING MAYBE LATER IF YOU WEREN'T DOING ANY-- NO. 18 00:02:01,944 --> 00:02:05,985 - I MEAN IF-- UH, WHEN YOU'RE NOT WORKING. - I DON'T THINK SO. 19 00:02:07,456 --> 00:02:10,261 OKAY, I GUESS I'LL JUST TAKE SOME SEA SNAILS AND BE ON MY WAY. 20 00:02:18,109 --> 00:02:20,782 NO, NO, A LITTLE LOWER. THE ONES ON THE BOTTOM. 21 00:02:39,853 --> 00:02:42,124 UH, 22 00:02:42,157 --> 00:02:44,530 HAVE A GOOD NIPPLE. 23 00:02:59,058 --> 00:03:01,029 [ Tires Screeching ] 24 00:03:02,933 --> 00:03:06,105 [ Laughing ] 25 00:03:09,913 --> 00:03:13,855 * COLOR ME YOUR COLOR, BABY * 26 00:03:13,888 --> 00:03:17,496 * COLOR ME YOUR CAR 27 00:03:17,529 --> 00:03:20,033 * COLOR ME YOUR COLOR, DARLING * 28 00:03:20,067 --> 00:03:23,741 * I KNOW WHO YOU ARE [ Both Laughing ] 29 00:03:23,775 --> 00:03:26,145 ** [ Continues, Indistinct ] 30 00:03:26,179 --> 00:03:29,185 AH, YOU HAVE BEAUTIFUL SKIN, BABY, HUH ? [ Laughing ] 31 00:03:29,219 --> 00:03:32,526 GET SOME OLIVE OIL, RUB IT ALL OVER YOU. 32 00:03:32,559 --> 00:03:34,763 WE'LL HAVE A GOOD TIME, HUH ? 33 00:03:34,797 --> 00:03:37,803 [ Woman ] OH, YEAH. 34 00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:42,144 [ Door Slams ] [ Man ] LET'S GET HIM OUT OF THERE. 35 00:03:49,860 --> 00:03:53,701 [ Man, Woman Moaning Passionately, Faint ] 36 00:03:55,003 --> 00:03:58,209 [ Woman ] OHH ! OH, ANTOINE ! 37 00:03:58,244 --> 00:04:01,215 YEAH ! [ Continues Moaning ] 38 00:04:06,627 --> 00:04:10,000 [ Moaning Pace Quickens ] 39 00:04:10,033 --> 00:04:13,274 [ Antoine ] OH ! OH ! OH ! OH ! OH ! OH ! [ Woman Shrieking ] 40 00:04:13,307 --> 00:04:16,245 [ Moaning Ceases ] 41 00:04:18,049 --> 00:04:21,255 TRY TO KEEP YOUR GOLDFISH IN THIS BOWL. 42 00:04:23,761 --> 00:04:26,165 IF YOU LIKE, I COULD STICK AROUND FOR AWHILE. 43 00:04:27,869 --> 00:04:30,742 EVERY KID NEEDS A FATHER. 44 00:04:42,097 --> 00:04:44,637 WHAT THE HELL ? 45 00:04:56,393 --> 00:04:58,229 - [ Roars ] - [ Gasps ] 46 00:05:04,910 --> 00:05:07,114 WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING ? 47 00:05:07,147 --> 00:05:11,657 THERE'S A MONGREL KOI IN THERE. IT'S THE MOST DANGEROUS OF ALL GOLDFISH. 48 00:05:13,026 --> 00:05:16,132 - DO YOU HAVE ANY ICE ? - HEY. 49 00:05:16,165 --> 00:05:18,136 SHOES OFF, HUH ? 50 00:05:18,169 --> 00:05:21,042 RESPECT THE 18th CENTURY PERSIAN CARPET. 51 00:05:25,017 --> 00:05:28,390 WHOA ! WHAT ARE THOSE ? 52 00:05:28,424 --> 00:05:32,297 MEDIEVAL WEAPONS. I'M A COLLECTOR. 53 00:05:32,331 --> 00:05:35,404 THEY'RE WORTH TWICE AS MUCH IF THEY'VE KILLED SOMEBODY. 54 00:05:39,045 --> 00:05:41,315 I COLLECT CANADIAN QUARTERS. 55 00:05:41,350 --> 00:05:43,921 I GOT ABOUT SIX OF 'EM. 56 00:05:48,931 --> 00:05:51,370 WOULD YOU LIKE ANYTHING TO DRINK ? 57 00:05:51,403 --> 00:05:53,741 I WOULDN'T MIND A GLASS OF-- 58 00:05:53,775 --> 00:05:56,380 WHOA. WHAT IS THAT ? 59 00:05:56,413 --> 00:06:00,488 IS THAT A CUSTOM LIVING COLOR ANTI-GLARE, RETRACTABLE-TOP TANK ? 60 00:06:00,521 --> 00:06:03,259 I'M NOT SURE. IT IS ! 61 00:06:03,293 --> 00:06:05,932 THEY ASSEMBLE EACH ONE OF THESE BY HAND. 62 00:06:05,965 --> 00:06:09,907 WHOA ! CHINESE TAILBAR LIONFISH. HE'S A BEAUT ! 63 00:06:09,940 --> 00:06:12,044 THAT'S AN $800 FISH ! 64 00:06:13,146 --> 00:06:15,919 - TRY A GRAND. - THEN YOU OVERPAID. 65 00:06:20,093 --> 00:06:22,264 HEY, FISHY, FISHY, FISHY, FISHY. 66 00:06:22,297 --> 00:06:25,137 HEY, FISHY, FISHY, FISHY. 67 00:06:25,170 --> 00:06:28,043 HEY. AN AUSTRALIAN RAINBOW FISH. 68 00:06:28,076 --> 00:06:31,082 YOU'RE NOT GONNA WANT TO PUT HIM IN THERE-- 69 00:06:31,115 --> 00:06:35,090 - OH, GOD ! - WOMEN LOVE IT. 70 00:06:35,123 --> 00:06:37,929 THEY FIND IT EROTIC WHEN THEY EAT EACH OTHER. 71 00:06:39,098 --> 00:06:41,837 EXCUSE ME FOR A SECOND, HUH ? 72 00:06:41,871 --> 00:06:43,875 MUST MAKE PEE-PEE. 73 00:06:47,648 --> 00:06:50,220 [ Urinating ] 74 00:06:56,500 --> 00:06:58,470 [ Phone Rings ] 75 00:06:58,504 --> 00:07:01,009 [ Answering Machine Beeps ] [ Woman ] ANTOINE, HI. IT'S REGINA. 76 00:07:01,042 --> 00:07:04,616 I'M FLYING IN FROM LUXEMBOURG TOMORROW. I WANT YOU TO BE MY DRIVER. 77 00:07:04,649 --> 00:07:07,956 SWISS AIR, FLIGHT 12. IS IT STILL 3,500 ? 78 00:07:07,989 --> 00:07:11,897 SEE YOU. CIAO. [ Answering Machine Beeps ] 79 00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:15,003 I FINALLY FIGURED OUT HOW YOU PICK UP ALL THESE GORGEOUS WOMEN. 80 00:07:15,037 --> 00:07:18,076 HOW'S THAT ? YOU'RE A LIMO DRIVER. 81 00:07:19,411 --> 00:07:22,017 SOMETIMES I AM. 82 00:07:22,051 --> 00:07:26,259 SO YOU JUST DRIVE THEM BACK HERE AND HAVE SEX WITH THEM ? IF THEY PAY ME ENOUGH, YES. 83 00:07:26,292 --> 00:07:28,998 WHAT KIND OF LIMO SERVICE IS THAT ? 84 00:07:29,031 --> 00:07:32,638 SHOULDN'T YOU BE TAKING THEM TO FANCY RESTAURANTS OR THE THEATER ? 85 00:07:34,075 --> 00:07:37,414 - I'M A GIGOLO. - A GIGO-WHO ? 86 00:07:38,584 --> 00:07:42,157 WOMEN PAY ME TO GIVE THEM PLEASURE. 87 00:07:46,733 --> 00:07:50,941 - HOW DID YOU GET THAT JOB ? - I JUST KIND OF FELL INTO IT. 88 00:07:52,111 --> 00:07:54,415 I'M GONNA KILL MY GUIDANCE COUNSELOR. 89 00:07:56,285 --> 00:07:58,957 ** [ Latin Dance ] 90 00:08:02,264 --> 00:08:06,205 HEY ! HEY ! HEY ! [ Chattering ] [ Dog Barking ] 91 00:08:16,159 --> 00:08:18,329 DOWN ! BAD DOG ! 92 00:08:27,347 --> 00:08:30,153 HEY, GUYS. DID YOU MISS ME ? 93 00:08:36,265 --> 00:08:40,541 WELL, THERE'S BEEN A SLIGHT DELAY IN OUR MOVE-TO-THE-BEACH PLAN. 94 00:08:42,845 --> 00:08:45,117 BUT DON'T WORRY. 95 00:08:49,425 --> 00:08:51,462 ITS'S GONNA HAPPEN. 96 00:08:56,305 --> 00:08:58,309 [ Antoine ] HEY, FISH GUY ! 97 00:09:01,583 --> 00:09:05,223 I THINK THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH MY, UH, UH, BIG FISH. 98 00:09:14,508 --> 00:09:17,247 pH IS OFF. THE NITRATES ARE AT A DANGEROUS LEVEL. 99 00:09:17,281 --> 00:09:21,890 - I CAN NEUTRALIZE IT. - OH, FISHY, FISHY, FISHY. 100 00:09:21,923 --> 00:09:25,163 THEY DON'T LIKE THAT. 101 00:09:27,467 --> 00:09:30,473 - I THINK OUR LITTLE FRIEND HAS MALAWI BLOAT. - WHAT THE HELL IS THAT ? 102 00:09:30,507 --> 00:09:33,546 - IT'S A GILL DISORDER. - IS IT BAD ? 103 00:09:35,483 --> 00:09:37,955 - COULD BE FATAL. - BUT IS HE GONNA MAKE IT ? 104 00:09:37,988 --> 00:09:42,364 HE'S IN SHOCK. I GAVE HIM SOME FREEZE-DRIED WATER FLEAS, BUT HE'S GOTTA WANT TO LIVE. 105 00:09:42,397 --> 00:09:45,203 THE NEXT FORTY-EIGHT HOURS ARE CRITICAL. FORTY-EIGHT HOURS ? 106 00:09:45,237 --> 00:09:48,977 BUT I GOT TO GO TO SWITZERLAND FOR BUSINESS. I'LL BE GONE FOR THREE WEEKS. 107 00:09:49,010 --> 00:09:51,816 WELL, CANCEL IT. YOU GOT A SICK FISH HERE, PAL. 108 00:09:51,850 --> 00:09:53,854 HEY, HEY, WHAT ABOUT YOU, HUH ? 109 00:09:53,887 --> 00:09:56,559 SOUNDS GOOD, BUT I CAN'T AFFORD TO GO TO EUROPE RIGHT NOW. 110 00:09:56,592 --> 00:10:00,734 MY PASSPORT EXPIRED-- NO, NO, I MEAN YOU CAN STAY HERE AND LOOK AFTER MY FISH. 111 00:10:00,768 --> 00:10:02,872 I'VE GOT A FULL BAR, HUH ? 112 00:10:02,905 --> 00:10:05,009 DIGITAL TELEVISION. 113 00:10:05,042 --> 00:10:07,682 YOU'RE ON THE BEACH. 114 00:10:07,715 --> 00:10:09,919 I DON'T KNOW. I-- 115 00:10:15,898 --> 00:10:19,237 I WOULD BE HONORED TO CARE FOR YOUR FISH. 116 00:10:33,333 --> 00:10:38,042 JUST REMEMBER, DON'T USE MY CAR AND DON'T ANSWER MY PHONE. 117 00:10:38,075 --> 00:10:41,549 NO CAR, NO PHONE. 118 00:10:41,582 --> 00:10:43,687 SO I GUESS THROWING A BIG BEACH PARTY'S OUT OF THE QUESTION. 119 00:10:47,962 --> 00:10:50,801 THIS IS A 14th CENTURY HUNGARIAN CROSSBOW. 120 00:10:50,834 --> 00:10:53,674 IT HAS KILLED A KING... 121 00:10:53,707 --> 00:10:53,940 AND CHANGED THE HISTORY OF EUROPE. 122 00:10:56,011 --> 00:11:00,553 YOU MESS UP ANYTHING IN MY APARTMENT, I'LL SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS. 123 00:11:02,725 --> 00:11:04,729 HAVE A GOOD TRIP. 124 00:11:12,745 --> 00:11:15,016 * COME ON, COME ON 125 00:11:18,690 --> 00:11:21,730 WOMEN PAY ME TO GIVE THEM PLEASURE. 126 00:11:26,840 --> 00:11:28,877 [ Screams ] 127 00:11:28,910 --> 00:11:31,682 * COME ON, COME ON 128 00:11:31,716 --> 00:11:34,187 * AND TELL ME WHAT YOU'RE SAYIN' * 129 00:11:34,220 --> 00:11:36,191 * COME ON, COME ON 130 00:11:36,224 --> 00:11:38,730 * GET A WHIFF OF WHAT I'M WEARING * 131 00:11:38,764 --> 00:11:40,768 * COME ON, COME ON 132 00:11:43,639 --> 00:11:45,778 * COME ON, COME ON 133 00:11:45,811 --> 00:11:47,782 * AND STOP * 134 00:11:47,815 --> 00:11:49,886 [ Man ] I'M ON THE BEACH. 135 00:11:49,919 --> 00:11:52,925 I MEAN, I OPEN UP MY WINDOW, I GOT SAND BLOWIN' IN MY FACE. 136 00:11:52,958 --> 00:11:56,198 IT'S THAT CRAZY. I'D LOVE TO SHOW IT TO YOU SOMETIME. NO. 137 00:11:56,231 --> 00:11:58,168 YOU REALLY OWE IT TO YOURSELF TO SEE-- NO. 138 00:11:58,202 --> 00:12:01,609 HEY ! TRY TO GET LAID ON YOUR OWN TIME, PAL. 139 00:12:01,642 --> 00:12:04,481 [ Customers Complaining ] 140 00:12:04,515 --> 00:12:06,685 I GUESS I'LL JUST TAKE SOME SEA SNAILS. 141 00:12:09,257 --> 00:12:11,796 YOU BETTER GET ME SOME FROM THE COLDER TANK. 142 00:12:27,962 --> 00:12:29,932 [ Clicks, Whirrs ] 143 00:12:29,966 --> 00:12:32,805 [ Man Calling Race ] 144 00:12:35,911 --> 00:12:38,315 [ Clicks, Whirrs ] 145 00:12:38,348 --> 00:12:41,121 ** [ "Strangers In The Night" ] 146 00:12:57,220 --> 00:13:00,059 [ Moaning, Sighing ] 147 00:13:00,092 --> 00:13:04,200 - [ Woman ] OH, YES ! OH ! - [ Doorbell Rings ] 148 00:13:04,234 --> 00:13:08,208 [ Man On TV ] I'VE BEEN BAD. I'VE BEEN REALLY BAD. 149 00:13:08,242 --> 00:13:10,212 [ Hand Swatting ] [ Moaning Continues ] 150 00:13:10,246 --> 00:13:13,352 - [ Clicking Frantically ] - [ Man ] BUT IT WAS WORTH IT. 151 00:13:15,723 --> 00:13:18,262 HI. WOULD YOU LIKE TO BUY SOME GIRLS OF AMERICA COOKIES ? 152 00:13:18,295 --> 00:13:21,970 [ Man On TV ] DON'T HIT ME WITH THAT. COULD YOU COME BACK LATER ? 153 00:13:22,003 --> 00:13:25,710 [ Swat ] EEW. WHAT ARE [ Man ] YOU WATCHING ? OHH ! 154 00:13:25,743 --> 00:13:27,982 - [ Moaning ] - YOU'RE GROSS ! 155 00:13:28,015 --> 00:13:31,121 YOU'RE A SICK MAN, AND I'M GONNA TELL ! 156 00:13:31,154 --> 00:13:33,625 [ Man On TV ] HIT ME WITH IT AGAIN. HOW MUCH ? 157 00:13:59,177 --> 00:14:01,381 [ Groaning ] 158 00:14:07,995 --> 00:14:09,999 GREAT. 159 00:14:10,032 --> 00:14:12,203 [ Electricity Crackling ] 160 00:14:12,236 --> 00:14:15,743 [ Gasping ] 161 00:14:17,113 --> 00:14:19,117 [ Grunting ] 162 00:14:42,563 --> 00:14:45,102 [ Grunting, Panting ] 163 00:14:45,136 --> 00:14:47,540 [ Phone Ringing ] 164 00:14:47,573 --> 00:14:49,946 [ On Answering Machine ] HEY, DEUCE, IT'S ANTOINE. 165 00:14:49,979 --> 00:14:53,052 I JUST REALIZED I DON'T KNOW YOU THAT WELL. 166 00:14:53,085 --> 00:14:55,089 TO BE HONEST, IT'S FREAKING ME OUT A LITTLE. 167 00:14:55,122 --> 00:14:57,928 YOU JUST MAKE SURE YOU KEEP MY APARTMENT CLEAN OR YOU WILL DIE. 168 00:14:57,962 --> 00:14:59,932 BYE-BYE. [ Answering Machine Beeps ] 169 00:15:05,944 --> 00:15:08,482 OH ! OH ! 170 00:15:32,663 --> 00:15:34,600 AAH ! 171 00:15:57,313 --> 00:16:01,588 SIX THOUSAND DOLLARS ? I KNOW. IT SUCKS. 172 00:16:01,621 --> 00:16:05,296 NEIL, WHERE AM I GOING TO GET $6,000 IN THREE WEEKS ? 173 00:16:05,329 --> 00:16:09,070 I DON'T KNOW YOUR BUDGET. YOU MAY NOT WANT TO... 174 00:16:09,104 --> 00:16:11,941 BLOW YOUR WHOLE WAD ON THIS TANK. 175 00:16:13,278 --> 00:16:15,482 I WOULD. 176 00:16:15,516 --> 00:16:18,388 CAN I PAY IN INSTALLMENTS ? NO. 177 00:16:18,422 --> 00:16:22,163 I'M UP TO MY BICEP IN IT, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. 178 00:16:22,196 --> 00:16:26,238 I'M NOT TRYING TO FLIP YOU OVER AND DO YOU DRY HERE. 179 00:16:26,271 --> 00:16:29,144 LOOK, SQUAT ON IT FOR A NIGHT... 180 00:16:29,177 --> 00:16:31,114 AND LET ME KNOW. 181 00:16:53,258 --> 00:16:55,329 [ Ringing ] 182 00:16:57,800 --> 00:17:00,506 WHAT ? HELLO ? [ Woman ] HI. 183 00:17:00,539 --> 00:17:03,145 I'VE BEEN STARING AT YOUR NUMBER FOR HOURS. 184 00:17:03,178 --> 00:17:05,382 I GOT IT FROM A FRIEND. 185 00:17:05,416 --> 00:17:08,822 UM, I'M NOT REALLY SUPPOSED TO USE THIS PHONE. 186 00:17:08,855 --> 00:17:10,826 WHY DON'T YOU COME OVER ? 187 00:17:10,859 --> 00:17:13,832 MY ADDRESS IS 1235 RADFORD WAY. 188 00:17:13,865 --> 00:17:16,571 ACTUALLY, I'VE-I'VE GOT A LOT OF WORK... 189 00:17:16,604 --> 00:17:19,544 TO DO HERE... STILL. 190 00:17:19,577 --> 00:17:21,581 I'M NAKED. 191 00:17:22,616 --> 00:17:25,289 * CALL ME ON THE LINE * 192 00:17:25,322 --> 00:17:29,397 * CALL ME, CALL ME ANY, ANYTIME * 193 00:17:29,430 --> 00:17:31,868 * CALL ME * 194 00:17:31,901 --> 00:17:34,507 ** [ Romantic ] 195 00:17:37,513 --> 00:17:42,356 NOW, THERE'S MY LITTLE GERMAN TOURIST. 196 00:17:43,525 --> 00:17:46,331 IS THIS IT ? IS THIS THE WHOLE OUTFIT ? 197 00:17:46,364 --> 00:17:48,502 IT'S PERFECT. 198 00:17:57,986 --> 00:17:59,890 "GUTEN ABEND, HERR FRAULEIN. 199 00:17:59,924 --> 00:18:04,200 YES. USE THE MAP. USE THE MAP. 200 00:18:10,579 --> 00:18:14,620 "VOHR EST DER STATUE OF LIBERTY ?" 201 00:18:14,654 --> 00:18:18,228 YOU SHOULD'VE STUCK WITH THE TOUR, HEINZ. 202 00:18:18,262 --> 00:18:20,599 NOW YOU'LL HAVE TO PAY THE PENALTY. 203 00:18:21,868 --> 00:18:25,709 IT'S-IT'S N-NO PROBLEM. I'LL JUST, UM-- 204 00:18:25,742 --> 00:18:28,882 LET ME SLIP ON A FEW OF THESE BABIES. 205 00:18:33,023 --> 00:18:35,429 [ Loud Roar ] 206 00:18:35,462 --> 00:18:39,002 - WHAT WAS THAT ? - I DIDN'T HEAR ANYTHING. 207 00:18:39,035 --> 00:18:41,274 NOW COME HERE, 208 00:18:41,308 --> 00:18:44,280 YOU NAUGHTY LITTLE SIGHTSEER. 209 00:18:44,314 --> 00:18:46,351 [ Groans ] 210 00:18:46,384 --> 00:18:48,888 - [ Roaring ] - [ Thud ] 211 00:18:48,922 --> 00:18:51,628 WAIT A SECOND. I DEFINITELY HEARD SOMETHING. 212 00:18:51,661 --> 00:18:54,567 OH, THAT'S JUST WOLFY. HE'S BEEN IN THERE A WHILE. 213 00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:57,373 NOW YOU CONCENTRATE AND STAY IN CHARACTER. 214 00:18:57,406 --> 00:19:01,012 - [ Roaring ] - WOLFY, SETTLE DOWN ! 215 00:19:01,046 --> 00:19:04,654 NOW YOU JUST FOCUS ON YOUR LITTLE WIENER SCHNITZEL. 216 00:19:06,424 --> 00:19:08,962 [ Snarling ] I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE. 217 00:19:08,995 --> 00:19:11,300 DON'T WORRY. HE NEVER GETS ALL THE WAY THROUGH. 218 00:19:12,436 --> 00:19:14,674 MAYBE YOU BETTER GO. [ Barking ] 219 00:19:17,713 --> 00:19:20,419 WOLFY, YOU'VE GOTTA STOP DOING THIS TO MOMMY'S FRIENDS. 220 00:19:20,452 --> 00:19:22,990 YES, HE DOES. YES, HE DOES. 221 00:19:23,023 --> 00:19:25,629 HE'LL BE ALL RIGHT FOR A WHILE. HERE, THIS IS FOR YOU. 222 00:19:25,662 --> 00:19:28,066 IT'S ALL I COULD GRAB. 223 00:19:28,100 --> 00:19:30,706 DID I BRING YOU PLEASURE ? NOT REALLY. 224 00:19:30,739 --> 00:19:34,112 YOU BETTER HAUL ASS. [ Wolfy Crashes Against Door, Whines ] 225 00:19:34,145 --> 00:19:36,718 [ Barking Continues ] 226 00:19:48,675 --> 00:19:50,612 TEN DOLLARS ? 227 00:19:52,916 --> 00:19:54,920 YEAH ! 228 00:19:58,795 --> 00:20:01,132 ** [ Night Fever ] 229 00:20:03,705 --> 00:20:07,546 ** [ Man Rapping Over Lyrics, Indistinct ] 230 00:20:17,500 --> 00:20:19,135 [ Man ] A MARTINI AND TWO OLIVES. 231 00:20:20,506 --> 00:20:22,476 MARTINI. TWO OLIVES. 232 00:20:22,510 --> 00:20:26,182 ANY LADIES NEED SOME ENTERTAINMENT TONIGHT ? 233 00:20:36,036 --> 00:20:38,040 EIGHT-FIFTY. 234 00:20:41,881 --> 00:20:44,887 - EIGHT DOLLARS ? - AND FIFTY CENTS. 235 00:20:46,724 --> 00:20:49,263 WELL, HOW MUCH JUST FOR A PLAIN CRANBERRY JUICE ? 236 00:20:49,296 --> 00:20:52,168 - UH, THREE DOLLARS. - I'LL GO FOR THAT. 237 00:20:57,646 --> 00:21:00,752 THERE YOU GO. THAT'S ELEVEN-FIFTY. 238 00:21:01,921 --> 00:21:04,192 UH, NO, NO. PERHAPS YOU MISUNDERSTOOD ME. 239 00:21:04,225 --> 00:21:07,666 I WISH TO CANCEL MY ORIGINAL ORDER OF THE MARTINI AND TWO OLIVES... 240 00:21:07,700 --> 00:21:11,674 AND GO FOR JUST THE PLAIN CRANBERRY JUICE BY ITSELF FOR THE THREE DOLLARS. 241 00:21:11,708 --> 00:21:14,680 AND I APOLOGIZE FOR ANY INCONVENIENCE THIS MAY HAVE CAUSED YOU. 242 00:21:14,714 --> 00:21:16,851 UH, PERHAPS YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. 243 00:21:16,884 --> 00:21:21,192 IF YOU DON'T PAY ME NOW, I'M GONNA TAKE THIS SWIZZLE STICK... 244 00:21:21,226 --> 00:21:24,299 AND, UH, I'LL BE SHOVIN' THAT RIGHT UP YOUR PEE HOLE. 245 00:21:26,403 --> 00:21:29,242 SO THAT WAS ELEVEN-FIFTY, RIGHT ? RIGHT. 246 00:21:29,275 --> 00:21:31,948 OKAY, THERE'S TEN... 247 00:21:31,981 --> 00:21:34,887 AND SIX QUARTERS, AND-- 248 00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:37,826 TELL YOU WHAT. I'LL GO WORK ON YOUR TIP. 249 00:21:39,262 --> 00:21:42,268 [ Speaking French ] 250 00:21:45,408 --> 00:21:48,381 I COULDN'T HELP OVERHEARING YOUR SPANISH. 251 00:21:48,414 --> 00:21:52,088 - IT'S FRENCH. - AH. OUI. 252 00:21:52,121 --> 00:21:55,294 FRENCH. NICE PEOPLE. MAY I ? 253 00:21:55,328 --> 00:21:57,966 - NO-- - [ Flatulent Sound ] 254 00:21:59,336 --> 00:22:03,076 OOH. [ Chuckles ] EXCUZES-MOI. THESE LEATHER SEATS. 255 00:22:03,110 --> 00:22:06,684 WOULD YOU LIKE A MARTINI OR CRANBERRY JUICE ? 256 00:22:06,718 --> 00:22:09,990 - NO. - KIND OF CELEBRATING TONIGHT. 257 00:22:12,863 --> 00:22:14,834 POSSIBLE CAREER CHANGE. 258 00:22:14,867 --> 00:22:17,472 MMM. 259 00:22:17,505 --> 00:22:20,010 I'M PRETTY EXCITED ABOUT IT. 260 00:22:20,044 --> 00:22:22,415 YOU WANNA GET OUT OF HERE ? 261 00:22:26,156 --> 00:22:28,962 OKAY. I'M SORRY. 262 00:22:28,995 --> 00:22:32,034 I MEAN, TOGETHER. 263 00:22:34,774 --> 00:22:36,911 [ Gulps ] 264 00:22:42,522 --> 00:22:44,526 WHAT HAPPENED TO THE CARPET ? 265 00:22:44,559 --> 00:22:48,868 OH, IT'S ONE OF THOSE 18th CENTURY WET RUGS. 266 00:22:57,284 --> 00:23:00,491 WELL, THAT'S CERTAINLY APPRECIATED. 267 00:23:01,928 --> 00:23:04,098 HEY, WHOA. 268 00:23:04,132 --> 00:23:06,537 MAYBE WE SHOULD TAKE CARE OF A LITTLE BUSINESS FIRST. 269 00:23:06,570 --> 00:23:09,543 IF YOU PREFER. 270 00:23:09,576 --> 00:23:13,283 I DON'T HAVE A SET PRICE OR ANYTHING, BUT I HAVE BEEN GETTING TEN DOLLARS. 271 00:23:14,854 --> 00:23:17,559 I'M SORRY ? WELL, THAT'S MY GOING RATE. 272 00:23:17,592 --> 00:23:20,465 BUT I'M WILLING TO NEGOTIATE. 273 00:23:20,498 --> 00:23:25,340 [ Chuckles ] THAT'S FUNNY. BUT THE PRICE IS 500. 274 00:23:25,374 --> 00:23:28,614 YOU'RE GONNA PAY ME $500 ? 275 00:23:28,647 --> 00:23:33,190 NO, HONEY. YOU PAY ME. 276 00:23:33,223 --> 00:23:37,198 OH, I GET IT. THIS IS SOME KIND OF ROLE REVERSAL. 277 00:23:37,231 --> 00:23:39,202 I'LL PLAY ALONG WITH THIS. 278 00:23:39,235 --> 00:23:42,341 OKAY, 300, 400, 500. YOU'RE MY HOOKER. 279 00:23:42,374 --> 00:23:45,147 NO, SERIOUSLY, WHERE'S MY TEN DOLLARS ? 280 00:23:45,180 --> 00:23:48,621 LOOK, ASSHOLE. I DIDN'T COME ALL THE WAY DOWN HERE FOR NOTHING. 281 00:23:48,654 --> 00:23:52,228 NOW GIVE ME MY $500 ! 282 00:23:52,261 --> 00:23:55,134 YOU GIVE ME TEN DOLLARS ! 283 00:23:55,167 --> 00:23:58,006 FIVE HUNDRED, NOW ! 284 00:23:58,040 --> 00:24:00,010 [ Groaning ] 285 00:24:00,044 --> 00:24:03,350 YOU PAY ME TEN DOLLARS. 286 00:24:04,285 --> 00:24:07,124 NICE. OOH ! 287 00:24:17,980 --> 00:24:19,984 IS THAT ALL YOU GOT ? 288 00:24:34,178 --> 00:24:36,683 TEN DOLLARS. 289 00:24:50,811 --> 00:24:52,649 NO ! PLEASE DON'T ! 290 00:24:52,682 --> 00:24:55,655 FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS... OR THE FISH GETS IT. 291 00:24:55,688 --> 00:24:58,226 LET'S TALK ABOUT THIS. 292 00:25:06,242 --> 00:25:09,215 - WHY DO YOU HAVE A PICTURE OF ANTOINE ? - WELL, THIS IS HIS PLACE. 293 00:25:09,248 --> 00:25:12,020 I'M WATCHING HIS FISH FOR HIM. 294 00:25:16,229 --> 00:25:19,368 PLEASE, DON'T TELL HIM ABOUT THE SHOES, HUH ? 295 00:25:22,341 --> 00:25:25,380 [ Door Shuts ] [ Sighs ] 296 00:25:35,300 --> 00:25:38,306 [ Door Slams ] 297 00:25:40,210 --> 00:25:43,316 CAN I HELP YOU ? OH, MY GOD. 298 00:25:44,318 --> 00:25:46,890 I'M LOOKIN' AT A DEAD MAN. 299 00:25:46,923 --> 00:25:50,464 YOU KNOW, CLAIRE TOLD ME THAT ANTOINE'S PLACE WAS MESSED UP, 300 00:25:50,497 --> 00:25:53,303 BUT I HAD NO IDEA. 301 00:25:53,336 --> 00:25:56,376 - CLAIRE ? - THE HOOKER YOU ASS-PUNCHED. 302 00:25:56,409 --> 00:25:58,747 THAT WAS A MISUNDERSTANDING. 303 00:25:58,781 --> 00:26:03,490 AND I INTEND TO HAVE EVERYTHING FIXED BY THE TIME ANTOINE GETS BACK. 304 00:26:03,523 --> 00:26:06,930 I'M JUST-- I'M JUST A LITTLE STRAPPED FOR CASH RIGHT NOW. 305 00:26:06,963 --> 00:26:09,903 MAYBE THERE'S SOMETHIN' WE COULD WORK OUT. 306 00:26:09,936 --> 00:26:12,642 CLAIRE MENTIONED THAT YOU DABBLE IN HARLOTRY. 307 00:26:12,675 --> 00:26:14,913 - I'M SORRY ? - YOU A MAN-WHORE. 308 00:26:14,946 --> 00:26:17,652 WELL, I TRIED THAT FOR A COUPLE HOURS-- SEE THIS RING? 309 00:26:17,685 --> 00:26:19,656 TOPAZ. THAT'S MY MOTHER'S BIRTHSTONE. 310 00:26:19,689 --> 00:26:21,660 GOT THAT FROM MAN-WHORIN'. 311 00:26:21,693 --> 00:26:24,365 SEE THIS KEY CHAIN ? THAT'S RIGHT. 312 00:26:24,398 --> 00:26:27,371 MINI YO-YO. KNOW WHERE I GOT THE MONEY FOR THAT ? 313 00:26:27,404 --> 00:26:29,275 - MAN-WHORING ? - STOCK MARKET. 314 00:26:29,308 --> 00:26:32,281 BUT I GOT THE MONEY FOR THE STOCK MARKET FROM MAN-WHORIN'... 315 00:26:32,314 --> 00:26:35,655 AND REPRESENTIN' MAN-WHORES LIKE YOURSELF. 316 00:26:35,688 --> 00:26:37,959 SO... YOU'RE A PIMP ? 317 00:26:37,992 --> 00:26:40,998 T.J. DON'T CONSIDER HIMSELF NO PIMP. 318 00:26:41,031 --> 00:26:43,570 MORE OF A MALE MADAM. 319 00:26:45,274 --> 00:26:47,578 THAT WASN'T TOO WELL THOUGHT OUT. 320 00:26:47,612 --> 00:26:49,883 [ T.J. ] LOOK AT THIS PROUD FISH. 321 00:26:49,916 --> 00:26:52,421 IT'S LIKE A COYOTE-- KING OF THE JUNGLE. 322 00:26:52,454 --> 00:26:56,529 IT'S LIKE ANTOINE. HE DON'T NEED NO PIMP. 323 00:26:56,562 --> 00:26:59,535 THEN LOOK AT THIS MID-LEVEL FISH HERE. 324 00:26:59,568 --> 00:27:02,574 WORKS HOTELS, CONVENTIONS, SENIOR CENTERS. 325 00:27:02,608 --> 00:27:07,017 I REPRESENT SEVERAL MAN-WHORES AT THIS LEVEL OF THE GAME. 326 00:27:07,050 --> 00:27:08,921 NOW LOOK AT THIS LITTLE FELLA, 327 00:27:08,954 --> 00:27:12,895 AT THE BOTTOM, TRYIN' TO GET BUSY WITH THE SCUBA MAN. 328 00:27:12,929 --> 00:27:17,037 YOU KNOW, IF YOU WORK HARD AND LISTEN TO ME, 329 00:27:17,070 --> 00:27:19,074 THIS COULD BE YOU. 330 00:27:19,107 --> 00:27:21,045 WELL, THANKS, 331 00:27:21,078 --> 00:27:24,385 BUT I ALREADY HAVE A JOB. 332 00:27:24,418 --> 00:27:26,389 I CLEAN FISH TANKS. 333 00:27:26,422 --> 00:27:29,963 YOU GON' MAKE $150 CLEANIN' FISH TANKS ? $150 ? 334 00:27:29,996 --> 00:27:32,534 YEAH. FISH AIN'T GON' PAY FOR ALL THIS. 335 00:27:35,440 --> 00:27:37,812 I DON'T KNOW. 336 00:27:37,845 --> 00:27:40,484 YOU KNOW, ANTOINE'S GOT A BAD TEMPER. 337 00:27:40,517 --> 00:27:41,552 I REMEMBER ONCE I DROPPED A CIGAR ASH ON HIS RUG. 338 00:27:43,891 --> 00:27:47,464 HE MADE ME PICK IT UP WITH MY ANUS. 339 00:27:49,134 --> 00:27:52,541 WELL, MAYBE I COULD DO A COUPLE JOBS, 340 00:27:52,574 --> 00:27:55,514 JUST TO GET THIS PLACE FIXED UP. 341 00:28:07,772 --> 00:28:10,143 WE GOT A LOT OF WORK TO DO. 342 00:28:10,176 --> 00:28:19,061 ** 343 00:28:19,094 --> 00:28:21,767 * I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES 344 00:28:23,235 --> 00:28:25,073 * WHERE YOU FROM 345 00:28:25,106 --> 00:28:27,611 * YOU SEXY THING * SEXY THING, YOU 346 00:28:27,644 --> 00:28:29,615 * I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES 347 00:28:29,648 --> 00:28:31,853 AAAAAH ! 348 00:28:31,887 --> 00:28:34,057 * SINCE YOU CAME ALONG 349 00:28:34,091 --> 00:28:35,627 * YOU SEXY THING * 350 00:28:35,660 --> 00:28:38,901 ** 351 00:28:38,934 --> 00:28:42,207 ** AAAAAAH ! [ Groans ] 352 00:28:42,240 --> 00:28:55,233 ** 353 00:28:55,266 --> 00:28:58,673 ** 354 00:28:58,706 --> 00:29:00,677 ** [ Tape Rips ] YEEEEE-AAAAAH ! 355 00:29:00,710 --> 00:29:04,518 [ Scream Continues, Reverberates ] 356 00:29:04,552 --> 00:29:07,123 YOU A MAN-WHORE NOW. 357 00:29:07,157 --> 00:29:09,294 I'M SO PROUD. 358 00:29:09,327 --> 00:29:11,131 THANKS, T.J. 359 00:29:11,165 --> 00:29:14,137 NOW REMEMBER, IT'S A BUSINESS. 360 00:29:14,171 --> 00:29:17,177 NEVER, EVER FALL IN LOVE. 361 00:29:24,658 --> 00:29:27,631 [ Car Starts, Races Away ] 362 00:29:27,664 --> 00:29:30,269 [ Buzzer Lock Sounds ] 363 00:29:40,089 --> 00:29:42,694 [ Low, Masculine Voice ] I'M UPSTAIRS ! 364 00:30:00,129 --> 00:30:02,634 OKAY, DEUCE, 365 00:30:02,668 --> 00:30:04,672 DON'T FALL IN LOVE. 366 00:30:16,428 --> 00:30:18,032 I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKIN'. 367 00:30:19,869 --> 00:30:24,144 YOU'RE THINKIN' THOSE ARE THE BIGGEST BOOBIES YOU'VE EVER SEEN. 368 00:30:24,177 --> 00:30:26,148 CAN I PLEASE USE YOUR PHONE ? 369 00:30:26,181 --> 00:30:28,152 I'M NOT YOUR AVERAGE WOMAN. 370 00:30:28,185 --> 00:30:30,156 I LIKE SEX, 371 00:30:30,189 --> 00:30:33,395 AND I'M NOT AFRAID TO ADM-- [ Wet Coughing ] 372 00:30:36,068 --> 00:30:38,339 EXCUSE ME. I JUST HAD PUDDING AN HOUR AGO. 373 00:30:38,372 --> 00:30:43,049 - DEAR GOD. - YOU EVER PARKED YOUR BICYCLE IN AN AIRPLANE HANGAR ? 374 00:30:43,082 --> 00:30:48,459 - I'M SORRY ? - YOU EVER THROWN A TOOTHPICK INTO A VOLCANO ? 375 00:30:48,492 --> 00:30:51,365 - WHAT ? - OH, NOTHING. 376 00:30:51,398 --> 00:30:54,171 JUST MAKING IDLE CHITCHAT. 377 00:30:54,204 --> 00:30:57,443 - ARE YOU COMFORTABLE ? - ACTUALLY, NO. 378 00:30:57,477 --> 00:31:00,750 OOH, I'M SWEATIN'. 379 00:31:00,784 --> 00:31:02,788 YOU'RE GETTIN' ME ALL HOT. 380 00:31:03,924 --> 00:31:05,526 YOU DON'T LIKE MY HAIR, DO YOU ? 381 00:31:05,559 --> 00:31:08,499 - I THINK THERE'S BEEN A MISTAKE. - DID YOU SAY STEAK ? 382 00:31:08,532 --> 00:31:11,405 - NO, MISTAKE. - OH, SEE, NOW YOU GOT ME ALL EXCITED. 383 00:31:11,438 --> 00:31:13,409 LOOK, I'M GAY. 384 00:31:13,442 --> 00:31:15,847 WELL, HOW GAY ARE YOU ? 385 00:31:15,881 --> 00:31:19,121 VERY, VERY GAY. YOU MUST HAVE DIALED THE VERY GAY ESCORT SERVICE. 386 00:31:19,154 --> 00:31:21,125 OH, SHIT. 387 00:31:21,158 --> 00:31:25,399 SEE, SOMETIMES MY FINGERS SWELL UP AND I CAN'T CLEANLY HIT THE NUMBERS. 388 00:31:25,433 --> 00:31:29,274 - THEY SHOULD MAKE A PHONE FOR FULL-FIGURED GIRLS. - THEY SHOULD. 389 00:31:29,307 --> 00:31:32,982 SO, WHAT DO WE DO ? 390 00:31:36,455 --> 00:31:40,563 [ Woman ] OH, YEAH. OH, YEAH ! 391 00:31:40,596 --> 00:31:44,004 CAKES AND PIES. CAKES AND PIES. [ Giggling ] 392 00:31:44,037 --> 00:31:47,010 OKAY, WHICH PIE HAS THE MOST SUGAR ? 393 00:31:47,043 --> 00:31:49,447 PEACH COBBLER. [ Sighs ] YOU WIN AGAIN. 394 00:31:49,481 --> 00:31:51,618 THAT'S FOUR GAMES TO ONE. 395 00:31:51,651 --> 00:31:54,491 WELL, FAST FOOD TRIVIA IS MY GAME, HONEY. 396 00:31:57,230 --> 00:32:01,171 I MUST TELL YOU, NOBODY HAS EVER PLEASURED JABBA THE SLUT. 397 00:32:01,205 --> 00:32:05,579 DEUCEY, YOU HAVE A WAY OF SATISFYING A WOMAN THAT WOULD SICKEN A NORMAL MAN. 398 00:32:05,613 --> 00:32:07,650 I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE. 399 00:32:07,683 --> 00:32:10,223 YOU MUST HAVE A MAGICAL "MAN-GINA." 400 00:32:10,256 --> 00:32:12,327 HUH ? "MAN-GINA." 401 00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:17,403 IT'S A PROFESSIONAL TERM WE MAN-WHORES USE TO DESCRIBE OUR... HE-PUSSY. 402 00:32:17,437 --> 00:32:19,607 I'M NOT ONE OF YOUR MAN-WHORES. 403 00:32:19,641 --> 00:32:21,211 OKAY ? I QUIT. 404 00:32:21,245 --> 00:32:23,649 YOU UNGRATEFUL HE-BITCH. 405 00:32:23,682 --> 00:32:27,090 HOW 'BOUT I GET ANTOINE ON THE PHONE IN SWITZERLAND AND TELL HIM... 406 00:32:27,123 --> 00:32:29,094 HOW YOU REDECORATED HIS POON PALACE. 407 00:32:29,127 --> 00:32:32,700 I'M NOT AN UNGRATEFUL HE-BITCH. 408 00:32:32,733 --> 00:32:35,039 JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE TO THINK HERE. 409 00:32:48,332 --> 00:32:50,336 [ Urinal Flushes ] 410 00:33:00,623 --> 00:33:02,760 THANKS. 411 00:33:02,793 --> 00:33:05,599 HOW'S IT GOING ? PRETTY GOOD. 412 00:33:05,633 --> 00:33:08,739 HEY, DAD, LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION. AND WHAT'S THAT, SON ? 413 00:33:08,772 --> 00:33:12,313 DO YOU THINK IT'S WRONG FOR A MAN TO ACCEPT MONEY FROM A WOMAN... 414 00:33:12,347 --> 00:33:14,751 TO, YOU KNOW, SHOW HER A GOOD TIME ? 415 00:33:14,784 --> 00:33:17,123 I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT THAT THIS MORNING. 416 00:33:17,157 --> 00:33:21,131 THE IDEA OF A MAN-WHORE IS A RELATIVELY NEW IDEA. 417 00:33:23,535 --> 00:33:25,639 COLOGNE ? NO, THANKS. 418 00:33:25,673 --> 00:33:28,112 [ Loud Fart ] 419 00:33:28,145 --> 00:33:31,485 THESE WOMEN ARE LOOKING FOR SOMETHING MORE THAN JUST SEX. THEY WANT ROMANCE. 420 00:33:31,518 --> 00:33:33,689 WHAT DO YOU MEAN ? [ Loud Fart ] 421 00:33:33,722 --> 00:33:38,065 WELL, IT WAS LIKE WHEN I MET YOUR MOM, GOD REST HER SOUL. 422 00:33:38,099 --> 00:33:41,138 I DIDN'T HAVE SO MUCH AS A TOILET TO CLEAN. 423 00:33:41,171 --> 00:33:45,146 STILL, I WASN'T GOING TO PAY HER A DIME FOR SEX, NO MATTER WHAT SHE WAS CHARGING. 424 00:33:45,179 --> 00:33:46,815 WHAT ? [ Loud Fart ] 425 00:33:46,848 --> 00:33:50,256 YOUR MOM COULD'VE HAD ANY MAN SHE WANTED IN THAT STRIP CLUB, 426 00:33:50,289 --> 00:33:54,697 AND THIS BEING MY FIRST TIME IN BANGKOK, I WAS LOOKING FOR A GOOD TIME MYSELF. 427 00:33:54,731 --> 00:33:57,170 YOU MET MOM WHERE ? IT'S NOT IMPORTANT. [ Loud Fart ] 428 00:33:57,203 --> 00:33:59,707 THE THING IS, SHE SAW SOMETHING IN ME... 429 00:33:59,741 --> 00:34:02,380 BEYOND THE 200 BAHT-- 430 00:34:02,413 --> 00:34:04,351 A MAN WITH AN EYE FOR ADVENTURE... 431 00:34:04,384 --> 00:34:06,521 WHO WASN'T AFRAID TO RISK IT ALL. 432 00:34:06,555 --> 00:34:08,559 DAD, ARE YOU SAYING THAT-- 433 00:34:08,592 --> 00:34:12,533 [ Grunting, Shit Splattering Into Toilet ] 434 00:34:12,567 --> 00:34:15,873 SO WE TOOK ALL HER ONE-DOLLAR BILLS OFF THE STAGE, 435 00:34:15,906 --> 00:34:17,877 SAID GOOD-BYE TO THAT DONKEY... 436 00:34:17,910 --> 00:34:21,885 AND TWO DAYS LATER WE WERE MAN AND WIFE. 437 00:34:21,918 --> 00:34:24,491 AND WE WERE HAPPILY MARRIED A LONG TIME. 438 00:34:24,524 --> 00:34:28,765 SO, DO YOU THINK I SHOULD BE MORE OF A RISK-TAKER ? 439 00:34:28,799 --> 00:34:30,803 [ Toilet Flushing ] WORKED FOR ME. 440 00:34:30,836 --> 00:34:32,807 THANKS, POPS. 441 00:34:32,840 --> 00:34:34,844 [ Toilet Continues Flushing ] 442 00:34:36,915 --> 00:34:39,521 WELL, SON, 443 00:34:39,554 --> 00:34:42,527 LOOKS LIKE I'VE GOT SOME WORK TO DO. 444 00:34:47,001 --> 00:34:49,207 YOU GOT YOURSELF A MAN-WHORE. 445 00:34:49,241 --> 00:34:50,976 HAH ! [ Chuckling ] 446 00:34:51,009 --> 00:34:52,847 MY MAN ! 447 00:35:05,406 --> 00:35:08,245 IS-- IS TINA HERE ? YES. 448 00:35:08,279 --> 00:35:10,849 I'M DEUCE BIGALOW, YOUR DATE. 449 00:35:10,883 --> 00:35:12,987 I'LL GET MY THINGS. 450 00:35:18,532 --> 00:35:21,036 I LOVE THIS PLACE. 451 00:35:21,069 --> 00:35:23,275 WHERE YOU FROM AGAIN ? NORWAY. 452 00:35:23,309 --> 00:35:26,281 [ Man #1 ] FREAK ! I HEAR GREAT THINGS ABOUT IT. 453 00:35:26,315 --> 00:35:29,621 [ Man #2 ] HOLY SHIT, IT'S BIGFOOT ! SO, HOW'D YOU END UP HERE ? 454 00:35:29,654 --> 00:35:32,627 I HAD A PITUITARY GLAND PROCEDURE AT U.C.L.A. MEDICAL CENTER... 455 00:35:32,660 --> 00:35:35,599 AND FELL IN LOVE WITH THE PEOPLE HERE. 456 00:35:35,633 --> 00:35:37,637 [ Man #3 ] HEY, KEEP IT IN THE CIRCUS ! 457 00:35:37,670 --> 00:35:41,611 THIS PLACE HAS GONE WAY DOWNHILL. WHAT DO YOU SAY WE GO SOMEWHERE ELSE ? 458 00:35:41,645 --> 00:35:43,615 [ Man #4 ] THAT'S A HUGE BITCH ! 459 00:35:44,951 --> 00:35:47,790 I'M SORRY ABOUT WHAT THOSE PEOPLE SAID. 460 00:35:47,823 --> 00:35:50,396 YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO GO ON AL THE RIDES. 461 00:35:50,429 --> 00:35:52,667 [ Cup Slams On Table ] 462 00:35:52,700 --> 00:35:55,071 I HAD A REALLY GREAT TIME, 463 00:35:55,104 --> 00:35:56,941 BUT I SHOULD GO-- [ Groans ] 464 00:35:56,975 --> 00:35:59,079 EASY. EASY ! 465 00:35:59,112 --> 00:36:00,683 HEY, EASY ! 466 00:36:00,716 --> 00:36:02,953 [ Grunts ] WAIT ! WAIT ! 467 00:36:02,987 --> 00:36:04,991 AAH ! WAIT, WAIT ! 468 00:36:05,024 --> 00:36:08,599 I KNOW WHAT WE COULD DO ! I GOT IT ! 469 00:36:08,632 --> 00:36:12,840 GIVE ME A SECOND TO THINK HERE ! WAIT ! WHOA ! 470 00:36:12,873 --> 00:36:17,550 [ Tina Moaning ] OH, YES. OHH ! 471 00:36:17,583 --> 00:36:20,021 MMMM. OHH. 472 00:36:20,054 --> 00:36:23,495 [ Moaning Continues ] 473 00:36:26,601 --> 00:36:28,572 OH, GOD ! 474 00:36:28,605 --> 00:36:32,580 OH, NO ONE HAS EVER TOUCHED MY FEET BEFORE. 475 00:36:32,613 --> 00:36:35,017 WOW ! OOOH ! 476 00:36:35,051 --> 00:36:37,088 [ Moaning Continues ] 477 00:36:46,608 --> 00:36:48,545 DEUCE BIGALOW ? 478 00:36:48,579 --> 00:36:50,516 DETECTIVE FOWLER, L.A.P.D. 479 00:36:50,549 --> 00:36:54,457 I WANT TO ASK YOU A FEW QUESTIONS ABOUT ANTOINE LACONTE, 480 00:36:54,491 --> 00:36:58,197 KNOWN GIGOLO, MALE PROSTITUTE. 481 00:36:58,231 --> 00:37:01,237 I'M JUST TAKING CARE OF HIS FISH. 482 00:37:01,270 --> 00:37:02,940 I'LL BET YOU ARE. 483 00:37:02,973 --> 00:37:04,544 YOU MAKE ME SICK. 484 00:37:04,577 --> 00:37:09,921 YOU'RE GONNA TELL ME THAT GIGANTIC WOMAN DIDN'T JUST PAY YOU TO HAVE SEX WITH HER ? 485 00:37:09,954 --> 00:37:12,660 NO ! LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, MISTER. 486 00:37:12,693 --> 00:37:16,968 I CAN SLEEP AT NIGHT BECAUSE I MAKE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING, HONEST LIVING. 487 00:37:17,001 --> 00:37:19,941 I'M SURE YOU DO, BUT THERE'S NOTHING I CAN TELL YOU. 488 00:37:19,974 --> 00:37:21,845 OH, I THINK THERE IS. 489 00:37:21,878 --> 00:37:23,815 WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS ? 490 00:37:23,849 --> 00:37:26,855 YOU THINK I CAN GET ANYTHING FOR IT ? YOU KNOW, MONEY ? I DON'T KNOW ! 491 00:37:26,888 --> 00:37:30,696 YEAH, YOU THINK I'M A LOSER, DON'T YOU ? NO, I DON'T. 492 00:37:30,729 --> 00:37:35,137 WELL, MAYBE I AM A LOSER, BUT I'M A LOSER WHO CAN BUST YOUR ASS. 493 00:37:35,171 --> 00:37:38,845 YOU TELL ANTOINE I'M GONNA NAIL HIM. 494 00:37:42,653 --> 00:37:44,189 [ Zipper Zips ] 495 00:37:55,779 --> 00:37:57,750 [ Rings ] [ Woman ] HELLO. 496 00:37:57,783 --> 00:38:00,355 IS THIS RUTH ? YEAH. I'LL BE RIGHT DOWN-- 497 00:38:00,388 --> 00:38:02,927 GODDAMN IT ! 498 00:38:02,960 --> 00:38:04,997 NICE DAY, HUH ? YEAH. 499 00:38:05,031 --> 00:38:07,068 SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS ! 500 00:38:07,101 --> 00:38:09,239 [ Tires Screeching ] [ Horn Honking ] 501 00:38:11,945 --> 00:38:14,350 GEEZ, YOU OKAY ? 502 00:38:14,383 --> 00:38:17,221 I'M SORRY. I HAVE TOURETTE'S SYNDROME. 503 00:38:17,255 --> 00:38:20,896 IT CAUSES ME TO HAVE THESE UNCONTROLLABLE OUTBURSTS. 504 00:38:20,929 --> 00:38:23,401 IT'S NOT SO BAD. YEAH, IT'S OKAY. 505 00:38:23,434 --> 00:38:25,372 I MEAN, YOU GET USED TO IT. 506 00:38:25,405 --> 00:38:27,943 BALL SWEAT ! ANUS ! 507 00:38:27,977 --> 00:38:29,947 ANUS LICKER ! [ Gagging Noise ] 508 00:38:31,016 --> 00:38:33,120 YOU KNOW, THERE ARE SOME PLACES... 509 00:38:33,153 --> 00:38:35,124 I CAN'T G-G-GO-- 510 00:38:35,157 --> 00:38:37,295 NIPPLE BITER ! NAAH-NAAH-NAAH-NAAH-NYIII ! 511 00:38:38,832 --> 00:38:41,805 WHAT ARE YOU TALKIN' ABOUT ? I BARELY NOTICE IT. 512 00:38:41,838 --> 00:38:43,975 [ Giggles ] SCROTUM ! 513 00:38:44,009 --> 00:38:46,313 SPERM ! SPERM FACE ! 514 00:38:47,717 --> 00:38:50,154 I JUST CAN'T GO NEAR PLACES LIKE CHURCHES-- 515 00:38:50,187 --> 00:38:51,858 HA HA ! VULVA ! 516 00:38:51,891 --> 00:38:55,432 ELEMENTARY SCHOOLS-- JIZZ ! JIZZ TRAP ! 517 00:38:55,465 --> 00:38:57,436 PRETTY MUCH ANYWHERE. 518 00:38:57,469 --> 00:39:00,041 EHH-- FART ! DILDO ! 519 00:39:00,074 --> 00:39:01,276 BIG-- BIG, BIG TITTIES ! 520 00:39:02,512 --> 00:39:05,719 SHIT ! SHIT WHORE ! 521 00:39:05,753 --> 00:39:10,027 LET'S PUT THE TOP UP. I'LL PUT ON THE AIR CONDITIONING. 522 00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:15,472 YOU PROBABLY WANT TO TAKE ME HOME, DON'T YOU ? 523 00:39:15,505 --> 00:39:17,341 NO. 524 00:39:19,112 --> 00:39:21,083 HEY, I GOT AN IDEA. 525 00:39:22,386 --> 00:39:25,759 ** [ Organ: Charge ] 526 00:39:25,793 --> 00:39:28,531 I'M NERVOUS. THERE'S A LOT OF PEOPLE HERE. 527 00:39:28,564 --> 00:39:30,535 DON'T WORRY-- CRAP MUNCHER ! 528 00:39:30,568 --> 00:39:32,506 [ Man Mutters ] "CRAP MUNCHER" ? 529 00:39:32,539 --> 00:39:35,077 I KNOW ! HE WAS DEFINITELY SAFE ! 530 00:39:35,111 --> 00:39:38,484 WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THE OTHER TEAM ? ASSHOLES ! 531 00:39:38,518 --> 00:39:41,089 RIGHT. AND THEIR PITCHER-- 532 00:39:41,123 --> 00:39:44,062 I MEAN, STOP STALLING AND THROW IT ALREADY. 533 00:39:44,095 --> 00:39:46,534 BALL HAIR ! BALL HAIR ! 534 00:39:46,567 --> 00:39:48,805 YEAH, BALL HAIR ! 535 00:39:48,839 --> 00:39:51,945 WHAT WE NEED IS A STRIKE HAIR. 536 00:39:51,978 --> 00:39:54,817 THAT OTHER TEAM IS A BUNCH OF HIGH-PRICED BABIES ! 537 00:39:54,851 --> 00:39:56,821 - WHORES ! - YEAH ! YOU TELL 'EM, BABY ! 538 00:39:56,855 --> 00:40:01,998 [ Crowd Cheering ] 539 00:40:02,031 --> 00:40:04,135 [ Crowd Booing ] THEY CALLED HIM OUT ? 540 00:40:04,169 --> 00:40:06,941 - SCROTUM LICKER ! - YEAH ! 541 00:40:06,975 --> 00:40:09,245 PISS FACE ! PISS FACE ! PISS FACE ! 542 00:40:09,279 --> 00:40:14,255 [ All Chanting ] PISS FACE ! PISS FACE ! PISS FACE ! PISS FACE ! 543 00:40:14,289 --> 00:40:17,128 PISS FACE ! PISS FACE ! PISS FACE ! 544 00:40:19,232 --> 00:40:23,040 DEUCEY, YOU THE BEST HE-BITCH IN MY MAN-STABLE. 545 00:40:23,073 --> 00:40:26,480 IF I HAD TWO MORE MAN-GINAS LIKE YOU, I'D BE A MILLIONAIRE. 546 00:40:26,514 --> 00:40:29,052 T.J., I THINK I'M GONNA GET OUT. 547 00:40:29,085 --> 00:40:30,655 SIT DOWN. 548 00:40:30,688 --> 00:40:35,665 - THIS NEXT DATE IS WHAT WE MAN-PIMPS CALL A DOOZY. - WHAT'S WRONG WITH THIS ONE ? 549 00:40:35,698 --> 00:40:37,536 NOTHIN'. HAVE YOU SEEN HER ? 550 00:40:37,569 --> 00:40:40,141 WHAT IS SHE, 80 ? A HUNCHBACK ? 551 00:40:40,174 --> 00:40:45,151 SHE JUST GOT OUT OF COLLEGE. HER GIRLFRIENDS PITCHED IN TO GET HER A LITTLE BEEFCAKE. 552 00:40:45,184 --> 00:40:48,624 SHE THINKS IT'S A BLIND DATE. IT'S A GUY, ISN'T IT ? 553 00:40:50,027 --> 00:40:53,568 I DON'T THINK SO, BUT I HAVE BEEN FOOLED BEFORE. 554 00:41:16,346 --> 00:41:18,317 YOU MUST BE KATE. 555 00:41:18,350 --> 00:41:20,321 EXCUSE ME. WAITER. 556 00:41:20,354 --> 00:41:24,195 UH, YEAH, SORRY. WE'RE BUSY TONIGHT. 557 00:41:26,299 --> 00:41:28,203 ALL RIGHT, NUMBER FOUR ? YES, THANK YOU. 558 00:41:32,178 --> 00:41:34,650 - I'M KATE. - ARE YOU SURE ? 559 00:41:34,683 --> 00:41:36,754 I THINK SO. 560 00:41:36,787 --> 00:41:39,359 I'M SORRY. YOU'RE JUST NOT WHAT I EXPECTED. 561 00:41:40,394 --> 00:41:43,167 - REALLY. - NO, NO. 562 00:41:43,200 --> 00:41:46,373 I-I MEAN, IN A GOOD WAY. 563 00:41:46,406 --> 00:41:50,314 THEY DIDN'T SAY YOU WERE SO... PERFECT. 564 00:41:50,347 --> 00:41:52,418 [ Laughs ] "PERFECT." 565 00:41:53,688 --> 00:41:56,794 SALLY AND MEGAN DIDN'T TELL ME A LOT ABOUT YOU. 566 00:41:56,827 --> 00:41:56,860 WHO ? 567 00:41:59,866 --> 00:42:01,837 OH, RIGHT, UH-- 568 00:42:01,870 --> 00:42:05,444 WELL, I CLEAN TANKS... ERS. TANKERS. 569 00:42:06,714 --> 00:42:09,252 I'M SORRY. I'M STILL KINDA SHOCKED. 570 00:42:09,285 --> 00:42:12,191 I MEAN, YOU'RE-- YOU'RE REALLY NORMAL. 571 00:42:13,227 --> 00:42:15,231 THANK YOU. 572 00:42:15,264 --> 00:42:17,836 MY LAST COUPLE OF DATES HAVE BEEN HORRIBLE. 573 00:42:17,869 --> 00:42:22,211 - YOU GET FIXED UP ON A LOT OF BLIND DATES ? - ONLY RECENTLY. 574 00:42:23,280 --> 00:42:26,820 - HOW ABOUT YOU ? - THIS IS MY FIRST. 575 00:42:26,854 --> 00:42:30,394 - I HOPE THIS PLACE IS OKAY. - ARE YOU KIDDING ? IT'S TERRIFIC. 576 00:42:32,766 --> 00:42:34,636 [ Gasps ] OH, GOD. 577 00:42:34,670 --> 00:42:37,776 - ARE YOU OKAY ? - IS THIS ONE OF THOSE-- 578 00:42:37,809 --> 00:42:40,147 IT'S A SUSHI BAR. 579 00:42:40,181 --> 00:42:42,318 ARE YOU ALLERGIC ? YOU COULD SAY THAT. 580 00:42:42,351 --> 00:42:45,391 [ Exhales ] THAT'S A DOG-FACED PUFFER FISH OVER THERE. 581 00:42:45,424 --> 00:42:49,332 HE'S NOT EVEN FULLY MATURED YET. HE'S A TEENAGER, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD ! 582 00:42:49,365 --> 00:42:52,171 [ Speaking Japanese ] 583 00:42:52,205 --> 00:42:54,643 CAN I ASK YOU TO STOP THAT, PLEASE ? 584 00:42:54,676 --> 00:42:56,213 HAI. 585 00:42:59,219 --> 00:43:03,360 I DON'T SEE HOW IT COULD POSSIBLY BE PLEASURABLE FOR A WOMAN. 586 00:43:03,393 --> 00:43:06,299 I JUST DON'T THINK IT'S NATURAL. 587 00:43:06,333 --> 00:43:08,671 YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO GO UP THERE. 588 00:43:08,704 --> 00:43:11,677 TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH, I DON'T KNOW HOW MEN DO IT EITHER. 589 00:43:11,710 --> 00:43:14,950 YOU'RE NOT CURIOUS JUST TO TRY SOMETHING NEW ? 590 00:43:14,983 --> 00:43:17,956 I'M JUST NOT INTO IT. 591 00:43:17,989 --> 00:43:21,563 SO SPACE EXPLORATION IS DEFINITELY OUT FOR YOU. DEFINITELY. 592 00:43:21,596 --> 00:43:24,569 I MEAN, MORE POWER TO ANY WOMAN WHO WANTS TO BE AN ASTRONAUT. 593 00:43:24,602 --> 00:43:26,573 I JUST WOULDN'T DO IT. 594 00:43:26,607 --> 00:43:29,579 FRANKLY, I'D RATHER TAKE IT UP THE BUTT. 595 00:43:33,287 --> 00:43:36,293 SO YOU THINK THIS IS A GOOD SPOT ? 596 00:43:37,395 --> 00:43:39,399 PERFECT. 597 00:43:41,770 --> 00:43:43,708 LIFE'S FUNNY, HUH ? MMM. 598 00:43:43,741 --> 00:43:45,645 SOME PRETTY CLOSE CALLS. 599 00:43:47,047 --> 00:43:49,920 WONDER IF HE KNEW HOW CLOSE HE CAME TO THE END. 600 00:43:49,953 --> 00:43:52,625 OH, HE KNEW. 601 00:43:52,659 --> 00:43:56,299 I BET HE NEVER THOUGHT HE'D BE HELD BY SUCH A LOVELY WOMAN. 602 00:43:56,333 --> 00:43:58,370 DEUCE. 603 00:43:58,403 --> 00:44:02,478 YOU'RE EMBARRASSING ME IN FRONT OF OUR NEW FRIEND. 604 00:44:02,511 --> 00:44:12,631 ** 605 00:44:12,666 --> 00:44:15,504 ** THAT WAS A REALLY NICE THING YOU DID TONIGHT. 606 00:44:15,537 --> 00:44:16,940 ** 607 00:44:16,974 --> 00:44:20,113 ** TOO BAD IT'S A FRESHWATER FISH. 608 00:44:20,146 --> 00:44:22,686 ** [ Laughs ] I-I'M KIDDING. 609 00:44:22,719 --> 00:44:24,690 ** I'M JUST JOKING. 610 00:44:24,723 --> 00:44:26,526 ** 611 00:44:26,559 --> 00:44:28,497 * TAKES SOME TIME [ Door Unlocks ] 612 00:44:28,530 --> 00:44:31,436 * FOR OUR FEELINGS TO GROW 613 00:44:31,469 --> 00:44:35,143 * OOOH-OOH-OOH-OOH GOOD NIGHT. 614 00:44:35,176 --> 00:44:37,014 * YOU'RE SO CLOSE NOW GOOD NIGHT. 615 00:44:37,047 --> 00:44:40,722 * I CAN'T LET YOU GO 616 00:44:40,755 --> 00:44:43,393 * OOOH-OOH-OOH-OOH 617 00:44:43,427 --> 00:44:47,736 * AND I CAN'T LET GO 618 00:44:47,769 --> 00:44:51,810 * WITH YOU I'M NOT SHY 619 00:44:51,844 --> 00:44:54,114 * TO SHOW THE WAY I FEEL 620 00:44:54,148 --> 00:44:56,686 * WITH YOU I MIGHT TRY * 621 00:44:58,222 --> 00:45:00,527 YOU'VE HAD YOURSELF AN INTERESTING LITTLE EVENING. 622 00:45:00,561 --> 00:45:04,168 JUST TAKING CARE OF HIS FISH, HUH ? SHE LOOKS LIKE A NICE CATCH. 623 00:45:04,201 --> 00:45:07,776 IT WAS A FIRST DATE. LISTEN UP, MAN-WHORE. 624 00:45:07,809 --> 00:45:09,746 I OUGHTA BUST YOU RIGHT NOW. 625 00:45:09,780 --> 00:45:13,152 WE JUST HAD SUSHI. "SUSHI" ? IS THAT WHAT THEY CALL IT NOWADAYS ? 626 00:45:13,186 --> 00:45:15,925 I'M HIP TO YOUR MAN-WHORE SLANG. 627 00:45:15,958 --> 00:45:21,235 ALL RIGHT, FINE, WHY DON'T I JUST GO HAVE A CHAT WITH YOUR SPICY TUNA ROLL. 628 00:45:21,268 --> 00:45:22,671 NO, DON'T ! 629 00:45:23,974 --> 00:45:26,880 ALL RIGHT. OKAY, DEUCE. 630 00:45:26,914 --> 00:45:28,918 NO PROBLEM, BABY. RELAX. 631 00:45:28,951 --> 00:45:32,257 MAYBE I'LL EVEN LET THIS ONE SLIDE FOR SOME INFORMATION. 632 00:45:32,290 --> 00:45:34,830 LIKE ANTOINE'S BLACK BOOK. 633 00:45:34,863 --> 00:45:37,969 YOU KNOW, THE ONE WITH HIS LIST OF CLIENTS. I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT IT. 634 00:45:38,002 --> 00:45:40,473 OH, YEAH ? YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THIS ? 635 00:45:41,275 --> 00:45:43,680 LOOK. SEE THAT RED SPOT ? 636 00:45:43,713 --> 00:45:47,020 THAT WASN'T THERE THIS MORNING. YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS ? 637 00:45:47,054 --> 00:45:50,527 MAYBE IT'S A RASH, SOMETHING YOU GOT FROM JOGGING. HOW THE HELL DO I KNOW ? 638 00:45:50,561 --> 00:45:53,600 GET IT AWAY FROM ME. 639 00:45:53,633 --> 00:45:55,604 MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT. 640 00:45:55,637 --> 00:45:57,876 YOU GOT THREE DAYS, BIGALOW. 641 00:45:57,909 --> 00:45:59,745 [ Zipper Zips ] 642 00:46:05,858 --> 00:46:09,164 T.J., I REALLY LIKE THIS GIRL. 643 00:46:09,198 --> 00:46:13,740 DEUCEY, DON'T BE FALLING IN LOVE WITH NO SHE-JOHN. YOU'RE IN IT FOR THE MONEY. 644 00:46:13,774 --> 00:46:17,047 ANTOINE'LL BE BACK SOON. APARTMENT AIN'T GONNA PAY TO FIX ITSELF. 645 00:46:17,080 --> 00:46:19,051 I KNOW. 646 00:46:19,084 --> 00:46:22,992 - HEY, THERE'S BEEN THIS DETECTIVE FOLLOWING ME. - GODDAMN IT, WHITE BOY ! 647 00:46:23,026 --> 00:46:26,232 - YOU DIDN'T TELL HIM NOTHIN' ABOUT ME, DID YA ? - NO, BUT WHAT SHOULD I DO ? 648 00:46:27,902 --> 00:46:30,908 - ABOUT WHAT ? - ABOUT THE COP. 649 00:46:30,942 --> 00:46:33,246 WOULD YOU STOP MENTIONING THE DAMN COPS ! 650 00:46:33,279 --> 00:46:36,285 DON'T MAKE ME HE-BITCH MAN-SLAP YOU. 651 00:46:42,731 --> 00:46:45,070 [ Doorbell Rings ] 652 00:46:47,140 --> 00:46:50,714 HI, I'M DEUCE BIGALOW, YOUR MAN-WHORE FOR THIS EVENING. 653 00:46:50,747 --> 00:46:52,886 HI, I'M CAROL-- 654 00:46:52,919 --> 00:46:55,892 [ Thud ] [ Snoring ] 655 00:46:55,925 --> 00:46:58,429 I HAVE NARCOLEPSY. IT'S A SLEEPING DISORDER. 656 00:46:58,462 --> 00:47:00,300 IT ISN'T THE WORST THING. 657 00:47:00,333 --> 00:47:03,974 I'M JUST NOT ALLOWED TO FLY IN A PLANE OR DRIVE A CAR... 658 00:47:04,008 --> 00:47:05,978 OR WORK IN A GUN RANGE. 659 00:47:06,012 --> 00:47:08,783 - [ Chuckles ] YEAH. - [ Giggles ] 660 00:47:15,898 --> 00:47:17,801 [ Snoring ] 661 00:47:26,485 --> 00:47:28,456 THIS IS SUCH A TREAT. 662 00:47:28,489 --> 00:47:32,464 I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO TRY SOUP, BUT THERE'S THE FEAR OF DROWNING. 663 00:47:32,497 --> 00:47:34,701 [ Snoring ] 664 00:47:42,184 --> 00:47:44,154 I REALLY HAD FUN. 665 00:47:44,188 --> 00:47:47,527 - ARE YOU GONNA BE OKAY ? - I'LL BE FINE. 666 00:47:47,560 --> 00:47:49,531 YOU SURE ? YEAH. 667 00:47:49,564 --> 00:47:51,803 GOOD NIGHT. 668 00:47:53,139 --> 00:47:56,145 [ Thudding Down Stairs ] 669 00:48:05,096 --> 00:48:14,882 ** 670 00:48:14,916 --> 00:48:19,158 * I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF YOU, BABY * 671 00:48:19,191 --> 00:48:21,829 * I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF YOU, BABY * 672 00:48:21,863 --> 00:48:24,301 * YES, IT'S TRUE 673 00:48:25,603 --> 00:48:28,542 * YES, IT'S TRUE 674 00:48:30,613 --> 00:48:34,121 * WHENEVER WE KISS I GET TO FEELIN' LIKE THIS * 675 00:48:34,154 --> 00:48:38,129 * I GET TO WISHIN' THAT THERE WERE TWO OF YOU * 676 00:48:38,162 --> 00:48:40,266 ** [ Continues ] COME ON. YOU CAN DANCE. 677 00:48:40,300 --> 00:48:44,943 * COME ON, BABY IT FEELS SO NICE * 678 00:48:44,976 --> 00:48:47,047 * I WANT YOUR ARMS TO 679 00:48:47,080 --> 00:48:51,022 * WRAP AROUND ME TWICE 680 00:48:53,994 --> 00:48:58,069 * I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF YOU, BABY * 681 00:48:58,102 --> 00:49:01,075 * I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF YOU, BABY * 682 00:49:01,108 --> 00:49:02,610 * RIGHT OR WRONG 683 00:49:04,681 --> 00:49:06,652 * HEY, RIGHT OR WRONG 684 00:49:14,134 --> 00:49:17,674 * I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF YOU, BABY ** OH, DEUCE. 685 00:49:17,707 --> 00:49:20,580 YOU LOOK GREAT. THANKS. 686 00:49:20,613 --> 00:49:22,417 I WANT YOU TO MEET MY ROOMMATE. 687 00:49:22,450 --> 00:49:24,288 WHO'S THERE ? KATE ? 688 00:49:24,321 --> 00:49:27,694 - I HEAR SOMEONE. - IT'S JUST ME AND MY FRIEND. 689 00:49:27,727 --> 00:49:30,700 ARE YOU SURE ? I HEAR THREE PEOPLE. 690 00:49:30,733 --> 00:49:32,570 YOU'RE THE THIRD PERSON. 691 00:49:32,604 --> 00:49:34,608 OH. OH, OKAY. 692 00:49:34,641 --> 00:49:38,149 [ Whispering ] SHE'S NEWLY BLIND. SHE'S STILL GETTING ADJUSTED. 693 00:49:38,182 --> 00:49:41,588 BERGITA, THIS IS DEUCE. 694 00:49:41,622 --> 00:49:43,994 I THINK THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH CASSIE. 695 00:49:44,028 --> 00:49:46,465 OH, HONEY. 696 00:49:46,498 --> 00:49:48,336 THIS ISN'T CASSIE. 697 00:49:48,369 --> 00:49:50,340 HERE SHE IS. 698 00:49:50,373 --> 00:49:52,344 [ Meow ] 699 00:49:52,377 --> 00:49:54,614 OH, THERE YOU ARE. 700 00:49:54,648 --> 00:49:57,320 - IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU. - HI. 701 00:49:59,224 --> 00:50:03,732 ONCE YOU TRY IT FOR THE FIRST TIME, YOU'RE PRETTY HAPPY WITH THE RESULTS. 702 00:50:03,766 --> 00:50:06,705 I'VE NEVER MET A HAIR TRANSPLANT TECHNICIAN BEFORE. 703 00:50:13,719 --> 00:50:18,129 OH, MAN, I FORGOT. IT'S MY DAD'S BIRTHDAY. 704 00:50:18,162 --> 00:50:20,500 LET'S GO SEE HIM. HE'S WORKING. 705 00:50:20,533 --> 00:50:22,504 SO ? WHAT DOES HE DO ? 706 00:50:23,872 --> 00:50:27,680 HE'S IN THE RESTAURANT INDUSTRY. 707 00:50:29,851 --> 00:50:33,426 KATE, I'D LIKE YOU TO MEET MY DAD, BOB BIGALOW. 708 00:50:33,459 --> 00:50:35,830 BOB, KATE. 709 00:50:35,863 --> 00:50:37,800 HI. 710 00:50:37,834 --> 00:50:39,804 SON, I'M VERY PROUD OF YOU. 711 00:50:39,838 --> 00:50:42,810 SHE IS A LOVELY YOUNG LADY. 712 00:50:42,844 --> 00:50:45,416 [ Chuckles ] THANK YOU. 713 00:50:45,450 --> 00:50:48,422 IT'S SO NICE TO MEET YOU. HAPPY BIRTHDAY. 714 00:50:48,456 --> 00:50:51,128 THANK YOU. WELL, WE SHOULD PROBABLY BE GOING. 715 00:50:51,162 --> 00:50:53,466 DEUCE. 716 00:50:53,499 --> 00:50:56,438 DAD PROBABLY HAS A LOT OF PAPERWORK TO DO, AND-- 717 00:50:56,472 --> 00:50:59,211 NO, THE PAPER'S COMPLETELY STOCKED. 718 00:50:59,244 --> 00:51:03,786 I'VE GOT PLENTY OF TIME TO GET ACQUAINTED WITH THE WOMAN WHO'S MADE MY BOY SO HAPPY. 719 00:51:03,819 --> 00:51:06,492 WE GOT YOU A CAKE. 720 00:51:06,525 --> 00:51:08,562 DEUCE SAID IT'S YOUR FAVORITE. 721 00:51:08,596 --> 00:51:12,537 WE HAD TO GO TO A FILIPINO BAKERY TO GET IT. YOU DIDN'T. 722 00:51:13,539 --> 00:51:15,510 YOU DID ! 723 00:51:15,543 --> 00:51:17,947 RASPBERRY BIBINGKA. 724 00:51:17,980 --> 00:51:19,684 AH, YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE. 725 00:51:19,718 --> 00:51:22,457 MY WIFE, GOD REST HER SOUL, 726 00:51:22,490 --> 00:51:24,661 USE TO MAKE THIS ALL THE TIME. 727 00:51:24,694 --> 00:51:26,632 YOU WOULD'VE LIKED HER. 728 00:51:26,665 --> 00:51:28,669 BANGKOK BETTY. 729 00:51:30,240 --> 00:51:34,214 SHE HAD THE MOST AMAZING MOUTH. IT PAID FOR OUR HONEYMOON. 730 00:51:35,650 --> 00:51:37,320 WE SHOULD PROBABLY BE GOING. 731 00:51:37,354 --> 00:51:40,226 DEUCE, IT'S YOUR DAD'S BIRTHDAY. 732 00:51:42,897 --> 00:51:47,240 HI. BOB, WE HAVE AN OVERFLOWING TOILET IN THE LADIES' BATHROOM. 733 00:51:47,274 --> 00:51:50,246 THERE IS SHIT EVERYWHERE. IT'S A REAL MESS. 734 00:51:50,280 --> 00:51:54,254 - YOU THINK YOU COULD TAKE CARE OF THAT FOR ME ? - NO WORRIES, VIC. RIGHT ON IT. 735 00:51:54,288 --> 00:51:57,260 I'D LIKE YOU TO MEET MY SON'S GIRLFRIEND KATE. KATE, NICE TO MEET YOU. 736 00:51:57,294 --> 00:51:58,996 YOU, TOO. HI, DEUCE. 737 00:51:59,029 --> 00:52:01,335 SO COULD YOU GET IN THERE, BOB ? 738 00:52:01,368 --> 00:52:05,576 I GOT A PARTY OF TEN COMING IN, AND I AM UP TO MY ANKLES IN HUMAN CRAP. 739 00:52:05,610 --> 00:52:07,880 IT'S A REAL STINKFEST BACK THERE. 740 00:52:07,914 --> 00:52:09,884 SURE. 741 00:52:09,918 --> 00:52:12,624 LOOKS LIKE I'D BETTER GET BACK TO WORK. 742 00:52:12,657 --> 00:52:15,296 IT'S A PLEASURE MEETING YOU, DEAR. 743 00:52:15,330 --> 00:52:18,302 WARMS MY HEART JUST BEING IN YOUR PRESENCE. 744 00:52:18,336 --> 00:52:21,040 THANK YOU. 745 00:52:21,073 --> 00:52:23,010 SEE YOU, SON. 746 00:52:26,685 --> 00:52:30,660 SEE, MY DAD'S ONE OF THOSE GUYS, HE LIKES TO BE INVOLVED IN EVERY FACET OF THE BUSINESS. 747 00:52:30,693 --> 00:52:34,668 IT'S OKAY. NO PROBLEM TO SMALL OR BIG. THEY COME TO HIM FOR EVERYTHING. 748 00:52:34,701 --> 00:52:37,674 DEUCE, IT'S ALL RIGHT. 749 00:52:39,109 --> 00:52:42,584 IT'S NOT HIS RESTAURANT. 750 00:52:42,617 --> 00:52:45,656 MY DAD'S NOT EVEN A WAITER. 751 00:52:45,690 --> 00:52:49,062 HE'S THE MEN'S ROOM ATTENDANT. I'M SORRY. 752 00:52:49,096 --> 00:52:51,668 DON'T BE SILLY. 753 00:52:52,837 --> 00:52:55,141 YOU KNOW WHAT MY DAD DOES ? 754 00:52:55,175 --> 00:52:57,680 HE'S AN AERONAUTICAL ENGINEER. 755 00:53:03,526 --> 00:53:06,030 [ Water Sloshing ] 756 00:53:08,869 --> 00:53:10,840 BOB ? 757 00:53:14,448 --> 00:53:16,418 [ Chuckles ] 758 00:53:16,452 --> 00:53:19,156 WANNA BLOW OUT YOUR CANDLE ? 759 00:53:21,060 --> 00:53:23,632 [ Chuckles ] 760 00:53:29,544 --> 00:53:31,815 MMM, NOW THAT'S GOOD BIBINGKA. 761 00:53:40,131 --> 00:53:43,104 I HAD A REALLY NICE TIME TONIGHT. 762 00:53:43,137 --> 00:53:45,843 I FIND THAT HARD TO BELIEVE. 763 00:53:48,949 --> 00:53:51,822 I'VE NEVER MET ANYONE LIKE YOU. 764 00:53:51,855 --> 00:53:54,594 GOOD. 765 00:53:55,696 --> 00:53:57,700 I HAVE TO SEE YOU AGAIN. 766 00:54:00,004 --> 00:54:03,546 WHEN WE GO INSIDE, TRY TO BE QUIET SO WE DON'T WAKE UP BRIGITA. 767 00:54:06,317 --> 00:54:09,991 * WITH YOU I'M NOT SHY 768 00:54:10,024 --> 00:54:13,298 * TO SHOW THE WAY I FEEL 769 00:54:13,331 --> 00:54:16,271 * WITH YOU I MIGHT TRY 770 00:54:16,304 --> 00:54:19,678 * MY SECRETS TO REVEAL 771 00:54:19,711 --> 00:54:22,884 * FOR YOU ARE A MAGNET 772 00:54:22,917 --> 00:54:26,992 * AND I AM STEEL 773 00:54:27,025 --> 00:54:28,996 WHY DON'T I GET THE LIGHT ? 774 00:54:31,000 --> 00:54:33,606 HANG ON. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. BE RIGHT BACK. 775 00:54:36,878 --> 00:54:39,049 [ Meows ] 776 00:54:39,082 --> 00:54:41,287 * OOH, OOH, OOH, OOH 777 00:54:43,726 --> 00:54:45,228 YOU ARE GOOD. 778 00:54:55,816 --> 00:54:58,321 HI. HI. 779 00:55:00,926 --> 00:55:02,864 ARE YOU ALL RIGHT ? 780 00:55:02,897 --> 00:55:05,970 I NEED YOU TO BE OKAY WITH SOMETHING. 781 00:55:06,003 --> 00:55:08,642 WHAT ? I'M OKAY WITH EVERYTHING. 782 00:55:08,676 --> 00:55:10,813 DEUCE. 783 00:55:10,846 --> 00:55:13,652 THERE MAY BE THINGS ABOUT ME THAT YOU DON'T LIKE. 784 00:55:13,686 --> 00:55:16,424 I LIKE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU. 785 00:55:16,457 --> 00:55:20,733 I MEAN, PHYSICALLY. 786 00:55:20,766 --> 00:55:24,139 SO YOU'RE TALLER THAN ME. BIG DEAL. I'LL GET OVER IT. 787 00:55:24,172 --> 00:55:26,845 IT'S NOT THAT. 788 00:55:26,878 --> 00:55:28,849 WHAT ? 789 00:55:28,882 --> 00:55:32,690 IF YOU WERE TO FIND OUT SOMETHING ABOUT ME... 790 00:55:32,724 --> 00:55:35,830 AND MY BODY THAT WAS MAYBE A LITTLE DIFFERENT... 791 00:55:35,863 --> 00:55:38,300 THAN WHAT YOU WERE USED TO, WOULD THAT BE OKAY ? 792 00:55:38,334 --> 00:55:42,443 THERE COULD BE NOTHING ON YOUR BODY THAT I WOULDN'T LIKE. 793 00:55:42,476 --> 00:55:44,748 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ? 794 00:55:46,250 --> 00:55:50,459 WHAT DO YOU GOT, LIKE, SIX TOES OR SOMETHING ? I CAN LIVE WITH THAT. 795 00:55:50,492 --> 00:55:52,897 DEUCE, I HAVE TO TELL YOU, 796 00:55:52,930 --> 00:55:55,435 I HAVE A-- SHH. 797 00:56:19,818 --> 00:56:21,822 [ Giggles ] 798 00:56:27,466 --> 00:56:30,439 [ Gasps ] OH, MY GOD. I'M SORRY ! 799 00:56:30,472 --> 00:56:34,146 I TRIED TO TELL YOU. NO, IT'S MY FAULT. 800 00:56:34,179 --> 00:56:37,085 I SHOULDN'T HAVE PULLED IT SO HARD. 801 00:56:37,118 --> 00:56:39,156 IF YOU WANT TO LEAVE, I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND. 802 00:56:39,189 --> 00:56:42,062 I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE. I'M SORRY I HAD THAT REACTION. 803 00:56:42,095 --> 00:56:44,567 I JUST-- I GOT A LOT OF THINGS GOING ON IN MY LIFE RECENTLY, 804 00:56:44,600 --> 00:56:46,838 AND THEY ALL SORT OF CULMINATED WHEN YOUR LEG FELL OFF-- 805 00:56:46,872 --> 00:56:48,942 CAME OFF-- DISCONNECTED-- 806 00:56:48,976 --> 00:56:51,581 - JUST GET OUT ! - OH, MY GOD ! 807 00:56:51,614 --> 00:56:53,418 PLEASE LEAVE. 808 00:56:56,056 --> 00:56:59,563 KATE ! I'M SORRY ! 809 00:56:59,597 --> 00:57:02,035 [ Sobbing ] JUST GO HOME. 810 00:57:02,068 --> 00:57:04,339 DON'T I HAVE A SAY IN THIS ? 811 00:57:04,372 --> 00:57:06,343 HAND ME MY LEG. 812 00:57:06,376 --> 00:57:09,583 THEN WILL YOU COME OUT AND TALK ? I DON'T KNOW. 813 00:57:14,259 --> 00:57:16,263 [ Click ] 814 00:57:17,699 --> 00:57:19,637 ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO STAY ? 815 00:57:19,670 --> 00:57:23,611 YES, BUT ONLY IF YOU COME OUT OF THERE. 816 00:57:24,948 --> 00:57:28,922 I NEED TO KNOW HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT ALL THIS. 817 00:57:28,956 --> 00:57:32,062 THE SAME AS I DID AN HOUR AGO, 818 00:57:32,095 --> 00:57:35,334 WHEN I THOUGHT TO MYSELF, "I'M THE LUCKIEST GUY IN THE WORLD... 819 00:57:35,368 --> 00:57:38,040 TO BE WITH HER LEG-- WITH YOU." 820 00:57:44,452 --> 00:57:46,657 [ Squeaking ] 821 00:58:05,529 --> 00:58:08,434 OW-W-W ! 822 00:58:09,803 --> 00:58:12,408 IS THIS NORMAL ? MY FACE IS NUMB. 823 00:58:12,442 --> 00:58:15,481 IT'S PERFECTLY NORMAL IN HAIR REPLACEMENT SURGERY. 824 00:58:15,515 --> 00:58:18,655 THE LOCAL ANESTHETIC HAS NUMBED THE MAJOR NERVES IN YOUR FACE, 825 00:58:18,688 --> 00:58:20,725 JUST LIKE AT THE DENTIST. 826 00:58:20,759 --> 00:58:24,366 [ Pounding ] OW-W-W-W ! 827 00:58:24,399 --> 00:58:29,042 YOU'RE KATE'S BEST FRIENDS, AND I KNOW YOUR OPINIONS MEAN A LOT TO HER. 828 00:58:29,076 --> 00:58:32,783 AND... I'D LIKE TO GET REALLY SERIOUS WITH HER. 829 00:58:32,816 --> 00:58:35,755 - YOU'RE A PROSTITUTE ! - NOT ANYMORE. 830 00:58:35,789 --> 00:58:37,759 AND IT'S "MAN-WHORE." 831 00:58:37,793 --> 00:58:41,701 ANYWAY, I JUST QUIT. I MEAN, KATE'S THE ONE FOR ME. 832 00:58:41,734 --> 00:58:44,072 LISTEN, YOU WERE ONLY SUPPOSED TO GO OUT WITH HER ONE NIGHT, 833 00:58:44,106 --> 00:58:46,310 SHOW HER A GOOD TIME, AND THEN GET THE HELL OUT OF HER LIFE. 834 00:58:46,343 --> 00:58:49,349 - YOU KNOW SHE'S NOT NORMAL. - SHE'S NOT LIKE OTHER GIRLS. 835 00:58:49,382 --> 00:58:52,422 YOU KNOW WHAT HER PROBLEM IS ? FRIENDS LIKE YOU. 836 00:58:52,455 --> 00:58:54,827 SHE'S PERFECT. SHE'S KIND, 837 00:58:54,860 --> 00:58:58,434 SHE'S SWEET, SHE'S FUNNY, AND SHE LIKES ME. 838 00:58:58,467 --> 00:59:00,572 NOW I CAME HERE TO GIVE YOU YOUR MONEY BACK-- 839 00:59:00,605 --> 00:59:04,479 THE MONEY YOU PAID A STRANGER TO HAVE SEX WITH YOUR FRIEND. 840 00:59:06,483 --> 00:59:10,191 HEY ! YOU STAY AWAY FROM HER, MAN-WHORE ! 841 00:59:10,224 --> 00:59:13,731 HIYA, DEUCE. YOUR THREE DAYS ARE UP, LOVER BOY. 842 00:59:13,765 --> 00:59:17,305 SO WHERE'S ANTOINE'S BLACK BOOK ? I'VE LOOKED EVERYWHERE. 843 00:59:17,338 --> 00:59:20,478 LISTEN, PUNK, YOU ARE AIDING AND ABETTING A KNOWN CRIMINAL. 844 00:59:20,511 --> 00:59:22,849 DO THE INITIALS T AND J MEAN ANYTHING TO YOU ? 845 00:59:22,883 --> 00:59:25,454 UH, TURKEY JIZZ ? I DON'T-- 846 00:59:25,488 --> 00:59:30,264 YOU BETTER SHOW SOME RESPECT, OR I'M GONNA RIP THAT PLEASURE- GIVING TONGUE OUT OF YOUR HEAD ! 847 00:59:30,298 --> 00:59:32,302 [ Zipper Unzips ] ONE MORE THING. 848 00:59:32,335 --> 00:59:35,241 I WAS AT THE PRECINCT, AND I REALLY HAD TO USE THE JOHN, 849 00:59:35,274 --> 00:59:37,412 AND IT'S PRETTY FILTHY IN THERE AND I WAS IN KIND OF A HURRY... 850 00:59:37,445 --> 00:59:40,451 AND I DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO USE ONE OF THOSE, YOU KNOW, PAPER ASS GASKETS. 851 00:59:40,484 --> 00:59:44,359 I WAS DOIN' MY BUSINESS, AND SOMETHING SORT OF SPLASHED UP ON ME, ALL OVER. 852 00:59:44,392 --> 00:59:48,200 WHAT DO YOU DO IN SITUATIONS LIKE THAT. YOU THINK I'LL BE ALL RIGHT ? 853 00:59:48,234 --> 00:59:51,573 I THINK YOU'RE PRETTY SAFE. I BETTER BE ! 854 00:59:56,884 --> 00:59:59,990 ** [ Funk ] [ T.J. ] UGLY IS NOT A PROBLEM FOR THIS GUY. 855 01:00:00,023 --> 01:00:02,395 MY MAN WOULD STICK HIS DICK IN A HE-MONKEY. 856 01:00:02,428 --> 01:00:04,432 ALL RIGHT. I'LL CATCH YOU LATER. 857 01:00:06,270 --> 01:00:08,741 WHAT UP, DEUCEY ? 858 01:00:08,775 --> 01:00:11,413 [ Sighs ] YOU SHOULD KNOW, THAT COP WON'T LEAVE ME ALONE. 859 01:00:11,446 --> 01:00:14,419 ** [ Off ] WHAT ABOUT THE COP ? 860 01:00:14,452 --> 01:00:17,592 HE'S BEEN ASKING QUESTIONS. GODDAMN WHITE BOY. 861 01:00:17,626 --> 01:00:20,331 ANYWAY, IT DOESN'T MATTER TO ME ANYMORE. I'M QUITTING. 862 01:00:20,364 --> 01:00:22,435 WHAT ABOUT ANTOINE'S APARTMENT ? 863 01:00:22,468 --> 01:00:25,441 I'M GONNA GET THE REST OF THE MONEY THE OLD-FASHIONED WAY. 864 01:00:25,474 --> 01:00:27,478 YOU GONNA STEAL IT ? 865 01:00:29,482 --> 01:00:31,486 SEE YA, T.J. 866 01:00:39,068 --> 01:00:41,941 I JUST QUIT ! I'M NEVER DOING IT AGAIN ! 867 01:00:41,974 --> 01:00:46,383 YOU LIED TO ME ! LISTEN, PLEASE. IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK. 868 01:00:46,416 --> 01:00:48,988 YOU WERE PAID TO GO OUT WITH ME ! 869 01:00:52,094 --> 01:00:55,067 [ Sobbing ] 870 01:00:55,100 --> 01:00:57,405 - YOU WANT BREAKFAST ? - KATE ! 871 01:00:57,438 --> 01:01:02,081 PLEASE GO AWAY ! I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN ! 872 01:01:02,114 --> 01:01:05,621 ME NEITHER. 873 01:01:05,654 --> 01:01:07,658 I'M SORRY. 874 01:01:13,570 --> 01:01:15,574 [ Snarls ] 875 01:01:17,578 --> 01:01:20,985 * I FEEL SAD WHEN YOU'RE SAD * 876 01:01:21,019 --> 01:01:24,125 * I FEEL GLAD WHEN YOU'RE GLAD * 877 01:01:24,158 --> 01:01:28,667 * AND IF YOU ONLY KNEW WHAT I'M GOIN' THROUGH * 878 01:01:28,701 --> 01:01:31,139 * I JUST CAN'T SMILE 879 01:01:31,172 --> 01:01:33,677 * WITHOUT YOU 880 01:01:36,516 --> 01:01:38,721 [ Shattering ] 881 01:01:38,755 --> 01:01:42,495 * YOU CAME ALONG JUST LIKE A SONG * 882 01:01:42,528 --> 01:01:44,900 * AND BRIGHTENED MY DAY 883 01:01:44,933 --> 01:01:47,939 * WHO'D HAVE BELIEVED YOU WERE PART OF A DREAM * 884 01:01:47,973 --> 01:01:52,682 * AND NOW IT ALL SEEMS A LIGHT YEAR AWAY * 885 01:01:52,716 --> 01:01:58,159 * AND YOU KNOW I CAN'T SMILE WITHOUT YOU * 886 01:01:58,193 --> 01:02:01,533 * I CAN'T SMILE WITHOUT YOU * 887 01:02:01,566 --> 01:02:05,107 * I CAN'T LAUGH I CAN'T SING * 888 01:02:05,140 --> 01:02:08,680 * I'M FINDIN' IT HARD TO DO ANYTHING ** 889 01:02:10,785 --> 01:02:13,991 I'M 1,500 SHORT. ISN'T THERE ANYTHING ELSE YOU CAN DO ? 890 01:02:14,025 --> 01:02:17,732 LISTEN, I CAME ALL OVER THE PLACE-- DOWN FROM SIX GRAND. 891 01:02:17,766 --> 01:02:20,237 THIS IS A CUSTOM HAND JOB. 892 01:02:20,270 --> 01:02:23,243 - LET ME PAY YOU MONTHLY. - THE LAST TIME I DIDN'T GET THE MONEY UP FRONT, 893 01:02:23,276 --> 01:02:25,815 I GOT THE BIG STIFFIE. [ Rings ] 894 01:02:28,286 --> 01:02:31,159 HELLO ? [ Antoine ] WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING PICKING UP MY PHONE ? 895 01:02:31,192 --> 01:02:35,869 I FOUND THE CORAL YOU WANTED. IF YOU ARE DOING ANYTHING I DISAPPROVE OF, I WILL KILL YOU ! 896 01:02:35,902 --> 01:02:39,877 HOLA, SENOR. NO Y TENGO. NO HABLA ENGLAIS. [ Antoine Chattering ] 897 01:02:39,910 --> 01:02:42,181 MURDER ! I WILL KILL YOU ! HASTA LUEGO. 898 01:02:43,750 --> 01:02:47,157 [ Rings, Beeps ] 899 01:02:47,191 --> 01:02:49,830 [ On Answering Machine ] HEY, ANTOINE. IT'S ELAINE. 900 01:02:49,863 --> 01:02:51,801 I REALLY NEED TO SEE YOU AGAIN. 901 01:02:51,834 --> 01:02:54,205 SAME PRICE, SAME PLACE ? 902 01:02:55,775 --> 01:02:58,647 I'LL HAVE THE MONEY. 903 01:02:58,680 --> 01:03:02,054 HI. UM, THIS ISN'T ANTOINE, 904 01:03:02,087 --> 01:03:04,291 BUT, UH, MAYBE WE CAN WORK SOMETHING OUT. 905 01:03:09,368 --> 01:03:11,807 HI. 906 01:03:25,969 --> 01:03:27,839 I'M DEUCE. 907 01:03:45,774 --> 01:03:48,313 STOP. WHY ? 908 01:03:48,346 --> 01:03:51,854 YOU DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX. YES, I DO. 909 01:03:51,887 --> 01:03:54,058 I THINK WE BOTH DO. 910 01:03:57,364 --> 01:03:59,970 DON'T YOU FIND ME ATTRACTIVE ? 911 01:04:00,003 --> 01:04:04,045 ARE YOU KIDDING ? YOU'RE ONE OF THE HOTTEST WOMEN I'VE EVER SEEN. 912 01:04:04,078 --> 01:04:06,851 EASY, EASY. 913 01:04:06,884 --> 01:04:09,722 I JUST CAN'T DO THIS. 914 01:04:09,756 --> 01:04:11,894 I'M HEAD OVER HEELS FOR A GIRL, 915 01:04:11,927 --> 01:04:15,000 AND WE'RE GOING THROUGH A ROUGH TIME, ME BEING A MAN-WHORE AND ALL. 916 01:04:15,033 --> 01:04:17,939 BUT I KNOW IT'S GONNA WORK OUT, BECAUSE I LOVE HER. 917 01:04:19,842 --> 01:04:22,181 WELL, SHE'S A LUCKY GIRL. 918 01:04:23,249 --> 01:04:25,487 AT LEAST EMOTIONALLY. 919 01:04:25,520 --> 01:04:28,493 MY GUY USED TO BE LIKE THAT. 920 01:04:28,526 --> 01:04:32,903 HEY. HANG IN THERE. 921 01:04:35,107 --> 01:04:37,979 THINGS HAVE A WAY OF WORKING OUT. 922 01:04:42,889 --> 01:04:45,760 HEY. WHERE YOU GOIN' ? 923 01:04:47,564 --> 01:04:50,503 WELL, I THOUGHT WE TALKED AND YOU UNDERSTOOD. 924 01:04:50,537 --> 01:04:54,511 I UNDERSTAND. BUT THE FACT IS, I STILL PAID FOR YOUR SERVICES. 925 01:04:54,545 --> 01:04:57,451 WHAT DID YOU HAVE IN MIND ? 926 01:04:59,255 --> 01:05:01,459 ** [ "Get Down Tonight" ] 927 01:05:07,637 --> 01:05:11,445 * BABY, LET'S GET TOGETHER 928 01:05:11,479 --> 01:05:14,518 * HONEY, HON ME AND YOU * 929 01:05:15,520 --> 01:05:17,926 * AND DO THE THINGS AH * 930 01:05:17,959 --> 01:05:20,330 * DO THE THINGS 931 01:05:20,363 --> 01:05:23,870 * THAT WE LIKE TO DO 932 01:05:23,904 --> 01:05:27,044 * OH, DO A LITTLE DANCE 933 01:05:27,077 --> 01:05:30,650 * MAKE A LITTLE LOVE GET DOWN TONIGHT * 934 01:05:30,683 --> 01:05:33,056 * GET DOWN TONIGHT 935 01:05:33,089 --> 01:05:35,627 * DO A LITTLE DANCE 936 01:05:35,660 --> 01:05:39,902 * MAKE A LITTLE LOVE GET DOWN TONIGHT * 937 01:05:39,936 --> 01:05:42,976 * GET DOWN TONIGHT, BABY GET DOWN, GET DOWN * 938 01:05:43,009 --> 01:05:45,180 * GET DOWN, GET DOWN 939 01:05:45,213 --> 01:05:47,251 * GET DOWN TONIGHT, BABY AAH ! 940 01:05:47,284 --> 01:05:50,257 * WOO, WOO, WOO, WOO WOO, WOO, WOO, WOO, WOO * 941 01:05:50,290 --> 01:05:53,429 * GET DOWN, GET DOWN GET DOWN, GET DOWN * 942 01:05:53,463 --> 01:05:55,600 * GET DOWN TONIGHT, BABY * 943 01:06:13,069 --> 01:06:17,011 I'M JUST EXHAUSTED. OH, GOD, YOU WERE AMAZING. ARE YOU KIDDING ? 944 01:06:18,646 --> 01:06:21,219 [ Elevator Doors Shut ] 945 01:06:21,252 --> 01:06:24,091 I JUST HAD TO SEE FOR MYSELF. 946 01:06:28,499 --> 01:06:30,703 OOF ! OH ! 947 01:06:30,737 --> 01:06:34,478 [ Groaning ] KATE ! 948 01:06:34,511 --> 01:06:38,186 * I'M NOT IN LOVE 949 01:06:38,219 --> 01:06:40,723 * I'M NOT IN LOVE 950 01:06:52,147 --> 01:06:53,783 OHH ! 951 01:06:53,816 --> 01:06:56,689 WHAT ? HOW'S ELAINE ? 952 01:06:56,722 --> 01:06:59,428 YOU KNOW, YOUR WIFE. 953 01:07:01,099 --> 01:07:02,801 BASTARD ! 954 01:07:02,834 --> 01:07:04,771 THIS WASN'T ABOUT SOME BLACK BOOK. 955 01:07:04,805 --> 01:07:07,144 YOUR WIFE WAS A CUSTOMER OF ANTOINE'S, WASN'T SHE ? 956 01:07:07,177 --> 01:07:10,417 THAT SON OF A BITCH IS GOIN' DOWN. AND YOU'RE GONNA JOIN HIM ! 957 01:07:12,754 --> 01:07:15,127 HOW'S THAT GONNA FIX YOUR MARRIAGE ? 958 01:07:18,766 --> 01:07:21,739 LOOK, I LOST SOMEONE THAT I LOVE TOO. 959 01:07:24,311 --> 01:07:26,715 YOU KNOW WHY SHE DID THIS ? 960 01:07:26,749 --> 01:07:30,190 YOU WANNA KNOW WHY SHE WENT OUTSIDE OUR MARRIAGE ? 961 01:07:30,223 --> 01:07:32,294 IT'S BECAUSE OF MY DICK, MAN. 962 01:07:32,327 --> 01:07:35,400 I MEAN, THAT'S THE REASON. IT'S MY DICK. 963 01:07:35,433 --> 01:07:37,871 TAKE IT EASY. 964 01:07:37,904 --> 01:07:41,445 YOU'RE SAYING YOUR WIFE CHEATED ON YOU BECAUSE YOUR PENIS IS TOO SMALL ? 965 01:07:41,479 --> 01:07:46,322 IT'S NOT TOO SMALL. IT'S TOO THIN, OKAY ? MY DICK IS TOO THIN. 966 01:07:46,355 --> 01:07:50,397 I'VE GOT A THIN DICK ! CAN YOU KEEP IT DOWN ? 967 01:07:50,430 --> 01:07:53,169 I'D LIKE TO COME BACK HERE SOMEDAY. EVERYBODY KNOWS... 968 01:07:53,203 --> 01:07:55,773 THAT IT'S WIDTH, WIDTH THAT GIVES SEXUAL GRATIFICATION. 969 01:07:55,807 --> 01:07:58,913 I'VE READ IT. COSMO, REDBOOK, YOU NAME IT. 970 01:07:58,946 --> 01:08:03,456 WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO ? I'VE GOT THE THINNEST PENIS IN THE WORLD ! HERE. 971 01:08:03,489 --> 01:08:06,629 IT'S LIKE A TWIZZLER. LOOK ! NO, NO, STOP THAT. 972 01:08:06,662 --> 01:08:10,303 SIT DOWN ! SIT ! 973 01:08:10,337 --> 01:08:13,676 IT'S NOT YOUR DICK. IT'S YOU. 974 01:08:13,709 --> 01:08:15,813 I'M TELLING YOU NOW, IF YOU PAINTED IT SILVER... 975 01:08:15,847 --> 01:08:18,519 AND TWISTED IT ON THE END, IT'D LOOK LIKE A KICKSTAND. 976 01:08:19,688 --> 01:08:21,825 IF MAN-WHORING HAS TAUGHT ME ANYTHING, 977 01:08:21,859 --> 01:08:24,965 IT'S THAT MOST WOMEN ARE AS UNHAPPY WITH THEIR ENTIRE BODY... 978 01:08:24,998 --> 01:08:26,869 AS YOU ARE WITH YOUR SMALL PENIS. 979 01:08:26,902 --> 01:08:29,241 THIN PENIS. WHATEVER. 980 01:08:30,610 --> 01:08:33,249 WHILE YOU'RE WORRIED ABOUT YOUR PENIS, THIN PENIS. 981 01:08:33,283 --> 01:08:35,987 WOMEN ARE WORRIED ABOUT THEIR HEIGHT, 982 01:08:36,020 --> 01:08:39,026 THEIR WEIGHT, THEIR GIANT FEET, 983 01:08:39,059 --> 01:08:41,732 THE STREAM OF OBSCENITIES THAT COULD BURST THROUGH THEIR MOUTH AT ANY SECOND. 984 01:08:41,765 --> 01:08:45,038 IF YOU MAKE A WOMAN FEEL GOOD ABOUT HERSELF, 985 01:08:45,071 --> 01:08:47,711 IT REALLY DOESN'T MATTER WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU. 986 01:08:50,015 --> 01:08:52,521 EVEN IF IT'S REALLY, REALLY THIN ? 987 01:08:52,554 --> 01:08:54,758 WE'RE TALKIN' SPAGHETTI STICK. 988 01:08:57,062 --> 01:08:59,033 TELL YOU WHAT. 989 01:08:59,066 --> 01:09:03,376 EVERY TIME YOU'RE FEELING SELF-CONSCIOUS ABOUT YOUR THIN DICK, 990 01:09:03,409 --> 01:09:06,749 SAY SOMETHING NICE TO MAKE YOUR WOMAN FEEL SEXY. 991 01:09:08,051 --> 01:09:12,025 I MEAN, IS THAT IT ? I MEAN, IS THAT ALL THERE IS ? 992 01:09:13,696 --> 01:09:16,335 THERE IS ONE OTHER THING. 993 01:09:16,369 --> 01:09:20,643 * DO A LITTLE DANCE MAKE A LITTLE LOVE * 994 01:09:20,677 --> 01:09:22,781 * GET DOWN TONIGHT 995 01:09:22,814 --> 01:09:25,118 * GET DOWN TONIGHT 996 01:09:25,151 --> 01:09:29,361 * DO A LITTLE DANCE MAKE A LITTLE LOVE * 997 01:09:29,395 --> 01:09:32,834 * GET DOWN TONIGHT GET DOWN TONIGHT ** 998 01:09:32,867 --> 01:09:35,373 UH, YES, SIR. 999 01:09:35,407 --> 01:09:39,347 UM, YOU'RE SURE THERE ISN'T ANYTHING YOU CAN DO ? 1000 01:09:41,552 --> 01:09:43,523 YES, SIR. I UNDERSTAND. 1001 01:09:50,903 --> 01:09:55,178 LISTEN. I REALLY APPRECIATE YOU HELPING ME. 1002 01:09:55,212 --> 01:09:57,617 I GUESS I MISJUDGED YOU. 1003 01:09:58,753 --> 01:10:00,757 ANYWAY, I GOT YOU OFF THE HOOK. 1004 01:10:00,790 --> 01:10:03,161 WHY AM I STILL WORRIED ? 1005 01:10:03,194 --> 01:10:05,600 YOU GOT TO GIVE THEM T.J. 1006 01:10:05,633 --> 01:10:08,606 I CAN'T DO THAT ! YOU GOT NO CHOICE. 1007 01:10:08,639 --> 01:10:10,610 I'VE BEEN WORKIN' ON THIS CASE FOR THREE MONTHS. 1008 01:10:10,643 --> 01:10:14,217 BOSS SAYS SOMEBODY'S GOT TO BE ARRESTED. BUT T.J.'S MY FRIEND. 1009 01:10:14,250 --> 01:10:17,457 THEY'RE SERIOUS, DEUCE. 1010 01:10:17,491 --> 01:10:20,663 LOOK, I DON'T LIKE IT, BUT IT'S EITHER YOU OR HIM. 1011 01:10:24,103 --> 01:10:29,648 YOUR HONOR, SEX FOR MONEY IS MORALLY REPREHENSIBLE. 1012 01:10:29,681 --> 01:10:34,725 MR. BIGALOW HAS COMPOUNDED THIS CRIME BY REFUSING TO NAME HIS HE-PIMP. 1013 01:10:34,758 --> 01:10:38,097 THEREFORE, WE ASK FOR THE MAXIMUM TERM... 1014 01:10:38,131 --> 01:10:41,203 FOR EACH OF THE FIVE COUNTS OF PROSTITUTION. 1015 01:10:44,277 --> 01:10:49,186 [ Loud Thudding, Rumbling ] 1016 01:10:58,906 --> 01:11:02,581 [ Burps, Sighs ] 1017 01:11:03,583 --> 01:11:05,587 EXCUSE ME. 1018 01:11:19,615 --> 01:11:22,854 WE NEVER HAD SEX. 1019 01:11:22,887 --> 01:11:25,025 WE TALKED ABOUT IT. 1020 01:11:25,058 --> 01:11:27,330 WELL, I TALKED ABOUT IT. 1021 01:11:27,363 --> 01:11:32,072 BUT DEUCE NEVER TOOK ADVANTAGE OF ME. HE SHOULD HAVE. 1022 01:11:32,105 --> 01:11:34,109 BUT HE'S MY FRIEND. 1023 01:11:34,143 --> 01:11:39,888 HE MADE ME REALIZE THAT I WASN'T JUST SOME HOT BABE WITH HUGE TITS. 1024 01:11:39,921 --> 01:11:42,894 EVEN THOUGH I AM. 1025 01:11:42,927 --> 01:11:46,000 OH, AND HE ALSO GOT ME WALKIN' AGAIN. 1026 01:11:52,446 --> 01:11:55,118 DEUCE AND I NEVER HAD SEX. 1027 01:11:55,151 --> 01:11:57,924 IT WAS PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE. [ Man #1 ] FREAK ! 1028 01:11:59,159 --> 01:12:01,431 IT'S TRUE I PAID HIM MONEY TO BE WITH HIM, 1029 01:12:01,464 --> 01:12:06,140 AND I'D DO IT AGAIN BECAUSE HE MADE ME FEEL GOOD ABOUT MYSELF. 1030 01:12:06,173 --> 01:12:08,779 BEHEMOTH. [ Coughs ] 1031 01:12:10,015 --> 01:12:13,321 AND NO ONE EVER TOUCHED MY FEET BEFORE. 1032 01:12:13,355 --> 01:12:16,293 [ Man #2 ] THAT'S A HUGE BITCH ! 1033 01:12:16,327 --> 01:12:20,436 DEUCE TAUGHT ME TO BE COMFORTABLE WITH WHO I AM. 1034 01:12:20,469 --> 01:12:22,406 THANK YOU, DEUCE. 1035 01:12:22,440 --> 01:12:24,878 Y-- ASSHOLE ! 1036 01:12:27,082 --> 01:12:30,188 THESE ARE VERY SERIOUS CHARGES, MR. BIGALOW. 1037 01:12:30,221 --> 01:12:32,493 I JUST HAVE ONE QUESTION TO ASK YOU. 1038 01:12:32,526 --> 01:12:36,434 DURING YOUR ENTIRE STINT AS A HE-WHORE, DID YOU HAVE SEX WITH ANYONE ? 1039 01:12:38,906 --> 01:12:41,343 - YES, YOUR HONOR. - [ Spectators Gasp ] 1040 01:12:42,513 --> 01:12:45,753 JUST ONE WOMAN. 1041 01:12:45,787 --> 01:12:48,492 - AND I'M IN LOVE WITH HER. - [ All Gasping ] 1042 01:12:48,525 --> 01:12:50,361 ORDER ! [ Banging Gavel ] 1043 01:12:50,396 --> 01:12:52,400 ORDER, PLEASE. 1044 01:12:52,433 --> 01:12:52,901 THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT, MR. BIGALOW. 1045 01:12:55,439 --> 01:12:58,044 DID SHE PAY YOU FOR SEX ? 1046 01:13:00,883 --> 01:13:03,422 NO. 1047 01:13:03,455 --> 01:13:05,258 CASE DISMISSED. 1048 01:13:05,291 --> 01:13:07,262 [ All Cheering ] 1049 01:13:07,295 --> 01:13:09,099 YES ! 1050 01:13:21,491 --> 01:13:24,464 THESE SHOTS WILL DEADEN THE NERVE AREA... 1051 01:13:24,497 --> 01:13:27,837 WHERE YOUR HAIR TRANSPLANTS WILL BE. 1052 01:13:29,373 --> 01:13:31,845 THERE. THAT SHOULD DO IT. 1053 01:13:31,879 --> 01:13:35,185 NURSE, WOULD YOU PLEASE REMOVE OUR DONOR HAIR. 1054 01:13:35,218 --> 01:13:37,222 I'LL BE BACK IN A MINUTE. 1055 01:13:49,079 --> 01:13:52,486 MR. JOHNSON, PLEASE JUST LIE BACK DOWN NOW. 1056 01:13:52,520 --> 01:13:55,158 OH, MY GOD. DEUCE ! 1057 01:13:55,191 --> 01:13:57,195 KATE, LISTEN TO ME. 1058 01:13:57,229 --> 01:13:59,233 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ? 1059 01:13:59,266 --> 01:14:02,239 IT'S THE ONLY WAY I COULD GET YOU TO SEE ME. 1060 01:14:02,272 --> 01:14:05,378 DEUCE, IT'S OVER BETWEEN US. 1061 01:14:05,411 --> 01:14:08,184 [ Grunting ] 1062 01:14:08,217 --> 01:14:09,988 LISTEN, 1063 01:14:10,021 --> 01:14:12,259 THOSE SHOTS HURT LIKE HELL. 1064 01:14:12,292 --> 01:14:14,263 COULD YOU AT LEAST HEAR ME OUT ? 1065 01:14:14,296 --> 01:14:18,204 WELL, I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH YOU CHARGE BY THE HOUR, BUT YOU HAVE ONE MINUTE. 1066 01:14:18,237 --> 01:14:21,210 OKAY. I DESERVED THAT. 1067 01:14:23,615 --> 01:14:26,588 I SHOULD'VE TOLD YOU RIGHT FROM THE START, 1068 01:14:26,621 --> 01:14:28,658 BUT I WAS AFRAID. 1069 01:14:29,627 --> 01:14:31,297 AFRAID OF WHAT ? 1070 01:14:31,330 --> 01:14:34,604 AFRAID THAT A GIRL AS WONDERFUL AS YOU... 1071 01:14:34,637 --> 01:14:39,313 COULD NEVER FALL FOR A GUY WHO CLEANS FISH TANKS. 1072 01:14:39,346 --> 01:14:41,718 'CAUSE THAT'S WHO I REALLY AM. 1073 01:14:41,751 --> 01:14:45,158 THIS WHOLE GIGOLO THING WAS JUST A MISTAKE. 1074 01:14:45,191 --> 01:14:48,231 BUT I'M GLAD IT HAPPENED... 1075 01:14:48,264 --> 01:14:52,072 'CAUSE I NEVER WOULD HAVE MET YOU. 1076 01:14:52,105 --> 01:14:55,111 I NEVER WOULD HAVE KNOWN WHAT LOVE WAS. 1077 01:14:56,113 --> 01:14:59,754 I'M SORRY. I'M NOT PERFECT. 1078 01:15:02,492 --> 01:15:06,067 [ Sighs ] I'M NOT PERFECT EITHER. 1079 01:15:07,402 --> 01:15:09,807 YES, YOU ARE. 1080 01:15:09,840 --> 01:15:12,813 YOU'RE PERFECT IN EVERY WAY. 1081 01:15:12,846 --> 01:15:15,752 I KNEW IT THE MOMENT I MET YOU. 1082 01:15:21,430 --> 01:15:24,369 KATE. 1083 01:15:24,403 --> 01:15:28,077 "YOU HAVE A SMILE THAT COULD MELT AN ICEBERG. 1084 01:15:28,111 --> 01:15:33,187 "YOUR LIPS ARE AS SWEET AS HONEY. 1085 01:15:33,221 --> 01:15:36,193 "YOU MAY ONLY HAVE ONE LEG, 1086 01:15:36,227 --> 01:15:41,137 BUT IT'S THE MOST BEAUTIFUL LEG IN THE WORLD." 1087 01:15:46,147 --> 01:15:49,554 ARE YOU KISSING ME ? 'CAUSE I CAN'T FEEL A THING. 1088 01:15:49,587 --> 01:15:51,624 [ Laughing ] 1089 01:15:51,658 --> 01:15:54,229 [ Woman On P.A. ] NOW BOARDING AT GATE 53. 1090 01:15:54,263 --> 01:15:57,235 FLIGHT 14 TO SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA IS NOW BOARDING-- 1091 01:15:57,269 --> 01:15:59,640 I'VE NEVER DONE THIS IN 12 HOURS BEFORE. 1092 01:15:59,674 --> 01:16:02,245 I'M NOT RESPONSIBLE IF THE SEALS LEAK. 1093 01:16:03,782 --> 01:16:07,322 SHIT ! S-SHIT CABINET ! 1094 01:16:07,355 --> 01:16:09,293 [ Snoring ] 1095 01:16:15,806 --> 01:16:18,778 COME ON, PUT THE FISH IN THE TANK ALREADY. 1096 01:16:18,812 --> 01:16:21,784 ANTOINE'S PLANE LANDED 20 MINUTES AGO. 1097 01:16:21,818 --> 01:16:24,824 I THINK WE'RE GONNA BE OKAY. 1098 01:16:25,992 --> 01:16:28,564 COULD YOU STEP THIS WAY, PLEASE ? 1099 01:16:30,969 --> 01:16:34,376 IS IT TIME TO PUT THE BIG GUY IN YET ? 1100 01:16:34,409 --> 01:16:37,382 [ Sighs ] GIVE HIM ANOTHER MINUTE. TEMPERATURE'S NOT RIGHT. 1101 01:16:46,267 --> 01:16:49,239 SPREAD THEM AGAIN, PLEASE. 1102 01:16:52,011 --> 01:16:54,650 [ Deuce ] OKAY, WE CAN PUT THE LAST FISH IN. 1103 01:16:54,684 --> 01:16:56,688 LOOKS LIKE YOU PULLED IT OFF, KID. 1104 01:16:56,721 --> 01:16:58,591 [ Bergita ] TIME FOR SOME TEQUILA ! 1105 01:16:58,625 --> 01:17:01,597 [ Blender Whirring ] 1106 01:17:01,631 --> 01:17:04,002 [ Whirring Stops ] 1107 01:17:04,035 --> 01:17:06,908 MARGARITAS, ANYBODY ? 1108 01:17:27,349 --> 01:17:32,359 [ Panting ] I NEED... CHINESE... TAILBAR... LIONFISH. 1109 01:17:34,596 --> 01:17:36,801 700, 800. WHERE'D YOU GET ALL THAT MONEY ? 1110 01:17:36,834 --> 01:17:39,840 - FRIENDS. - YEAH, RIGHT. 1111 01:17:39,874 --> 01:17:42,579 ANYTHING ELSE ? 1112 01:17:42,612 --> 01:17:46,721 ON SECOND THOUGHT, YOU'D BETTER GIVE ME SOME OF THOSE SEA SNAILS. 1113 01:18:15,445 --> 01:18:17,449 SO, UH, HOW WAS YOUR TRIP ? 1114 01:18:18,551 --> 01:18:20,588 VERY GOOD... 1115 01:18:20,621 --> 01:18:22,659 TILL ABOUT THREE HOURS AGO. 1116 01:18:22,692 --> 01:18:25,030 YEAH ? WHAT HAPPENED ? 1117 01:18:25,064 --> 01:18:27,401 I DON'T WANNA TALK ABOUT IT. 1118 01:18:30,641 --> 01:18:32,645 THE PLACE LOOKS GOOD. 1119 01:18:33,647 --> 01:18:35,618 GOOD TO BE HOME. 1120 01:18:35,651 --> 01:18:38,758 I SHOULD TAKE OFF SO YOU CAN RELAX. 1121 01:18:38,792 --> 01:18:41,129 IS THERE SOMETHING YOU'RE NOT TELLING ME ? 1122 01:18:42,599 --> 01:18:44,469 YEAH. 1123 01:18:44,503 --> 01:18:48,577 I PUT YOUR MAIL ON THE NIGHTSTAND. [ Clears Throat ] 1124 01:18:51,617 --> 01:18:53,621 RIGHT. 1125 01:18:57,629 --> 01:18:59,599 WHAT THE HELL IS THIS ? 1126 01:18:59,633 --> 01:19:02,004 A CHOCOLATE MARGARITA. 1127 01:19:02,038 --> 01:19:03,775 YOU'VE BEEN HAVING A PARTY ? 1128 01:19:03,808 --> 01:19:07,615 IT WAS, UH, MORE LIKE, UH, A WELCOME-HOME THING, REALLY. 1129 01:19:09,854 --> 01:19:12,491 I COULD REALLY USE ONE RIGHT NOW. 1130 01:19:16,032 --> 01:19:17,803 [ Slurping ] 1131 01:19:22,311 --> 01:19:24,583 SPICY. 1132 01:19:26,720 --> 01:19:29,125 I SHOULD PROBABLY GO. MY FISH. 1133 01:19:31,196 --> 01:19:33,033 THEY LOOK SMALLER. 1134 01:19:35,771 --> 01:19:39,646 SOMETIMES WHEN THEY'RE, UH, SICK, 1135 01:19:39,679 --> 01:19:41,784 THEY'LL SHRINK. 1136 01:19:43,386 --> 01:19:45,357 HEY, FISHY, FISHY, FISHY, FISHY. 1137 01:19:45,390 --> 01:19:48,832 HEY, FISHY, FISHY, FISHY, FISHY, FISHY, FISHY. 1138 01:19:48,865 --> 01:19:51,169 [ Tapping On Glass ] HEY, FISHY, FISHY, FISHY, FISHY. 1139 01:19:54,375 --> 01:19:56,814 [ Glass Cracking ] 1140 01:20:11,844 --> 01:20:15,819 I DID MAN-WHORE FOR A LITTLE BIT, BUT NONE OF YOUR CLIENTS. 1141 01:20:15,852 --> 01:20:17,789 NONE OF THEM. 1142 01:20:17,823 --> 01:20:20,829 I KNOW AN AQUARIUM GUY WHO CAN FIX ALL OF THIS. 1143 01:20:20,862 --> 01:20:23,166 - HE'S A LITTLE EXPENSIVE-- - HAH ! 1144 01:20:23,200 --> 01:20:25,270 DEUCE ! 1145 01:20:27,174 --> 01:20:29,378 [ Yelling, Grunting ] 1146 01:20:30,815 --> 01:20:32,886 NO ! 1147 01:20:37,061 --> 01:20:38,898 [ Grunts ] 1148 01:20:56,833 --> 01:20:59,338 - DEUCE ! - NO ! 1149 01:21:00,942 --> 01:21:02,711 [ Gasps ] 1150 01:21:06,486 --> 01:21:08,356 [ Gasping ] 1151 01:21:08,390 --> 01:21:10,394 [ Extracts Arrow ] [ Groans ] 1152 01:21:11,396 --> 01:21:13,767 OHH. 1153 01:21:13,801 --> 01:21:15,805 [ Sighs ] 1154 01:21:22,953 --> 01:21:24,789 HEY ! TOUGH GUY. 1155 01:21:24,823 --> 01:21:27,561 WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS ? 1156 01:21:27,594 --> 01:21:29,934 YOU'RE BUSTED. 1157 01:21:31,002 --> 01:21:32,973 WHAT'S GOIN' ON OUT HERE ? 1158 01:21:34,075 --> 01:21:36,446 I CAN SEE ! 1159 01:21:38,952 --> 01:21:40,554 YOU'RE BLACK. 1160 01:21:40,587 --> 01:21:42,424 I KNEW IT. [ Giggles ] 1161 01:21:44,162 --> 01:21:53,580 ** 1162 01:21:53,613 --> 01:21:56,954 * LOVE 1163 01:21:56,988 --> 01:22:00,327 * IS WHAT I WANT 1164 01:22:00,360 --> 01:22:02,598 * WHOA, YEAH 1165 01:22:04,535 --> 01:22:09,145 * AND ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS BRING IT TO ME, BABY * 1166 01:22:13,186 --> 01:22:16,526 * TALK 1167 01:22:16,559 --> 01:22:18,897 * IS WHAT I WANT 1168 01:22:18,931 --> 01:22:21,402 * WHAT I WANT * WHOA, YEAH 1169 01:22:21,436 --> 01:22:24,008 * WHAT I WANT 1170 01:22:24,042 --> 01:22:28,583 * AND ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS BRING IT TO ME, BABY * 1171 01:22:32,591 --> 01:22:35,264 * TALK * COME ON LET'S TALK ABOUT IT * 1172 01:22:35,297 --> 01:22:37,668 * TALK * CAN'T SEEM TO DO WITHOUT IT * 1173 01:22:37,701 --> 01:22:39,238 * TALK * DON'T WANNA BE 1174 01:22:39,272 --> 01:22:45,017 * ONE OF THE BROKENHEARTED 1175 01:22:45,050 --> 01:22:49,959 * SO LIFT ME UP FINISH WHAT YOU STARTED * 1176 01:22:49,994 --> 01:22:54,969 * TAKE ME OFF FOR A RIDE 1177 01:22:55,004 --> 01:22:59,612 * LIFT ME UP FROM THE BROKENHEARTED * 1178 01:22:59,645 --> 01:23:04,722 * RIVERS DEEP AND WIDE 1179 01:23:04,755 --> 01:23:07,028 * LIFT ME UP 1180 01:23:09,365 --> 01:23:14,275 * TAKE ME OFF FOR A RIDE 1181 01:23:14,308 --> 01:23:19,118 * LIFT ME UP FROM THE BROKENHEARTED * 1182 01:23:19,152 --> 01:23:25,197 * RIVERS DEEP AND WIDE * 1183 01:23:25,230 --> 01:23:28,203 * COLOR ME YOUR COLOR, BABY * 1184 01:23:28,236 --> 01:23:31,809 * COLOR ME YOUR CAR 1185 01:23:31,842 --> 01:23:35,050 * COLOR ME YOUR COLOR, DARLING * 1186 01:23:35,084 --> 01:23:38,390 * I KNOW WHO YOU ARE 1187 01:23:38,423 --> 01:23:41,696 * COME UP OFF YOUR COLOR CHART * 1188 01:23:41,729 --> 01:23:44,568 * I KNOW WHERE YOU'RE COMING FROM * 1189 01:23:44,602 --> 01:23:47,541 * CALL ME FOR A RIDE 1190 01:23:47,574 --> 01:23:51,416 * CALL ME, CALL ME ANY, ANY TIME * 1191 01:23:51,449 --> 01:23:54,422 * CALL ME, MY LOVE 1192 01:23:54,455 --> 01:23:58,263 * YOU CAN CALL ME ANY DAY OR NIGHT * 1193 01:23:58,296 --> 01:24:00,300 * CALL ME 1194 01:24:05,310 --> 01:24:08,583 * COVER ME WITH KISSES BABY * 1195 01:24:08,616 --> 01:24:12,191 * COVER ME WITH LOVE 1196 01:24:12,224 --> 01:24:14,862 * ROLL ME IN DESIGNER SHEETS * 1197 01:24:14,895 --> 01:24:18,736 * I'LL NEVER GET ENOUGH 1198 01:24:18,770 --> 01:24:22,278 * EMOTIONS COME I DON'T KNOW WHY * 1199 01:24:22,311 --> 01:24:26,619 * COVER UP LOVE'S ALIBI 1200 01:24:26,652 --> 01:24:29,758 * CALL ME FOR A RIDE 1201 01:24:29,792 --> 01:24:33,566 * CALL ME, CALL ME ANY, ANY TIME * 1202 01:24:33,600 --> 01:24:36,472 * CALL ME, MY LOVE 1203 01:24:36,506 --> 01:24:40,347 * WHEN YOU'RE READY WE CAN SHARE THE WINE * 1204 01:24:40,380 --> 01:24:42,218 * CALL ME 1205 01:24:47,394 --> 01:24:49,365 * OOH-OOH-OOH, OOH-OOH 1206 01:24:49,398 --> 01:24:54,275 * HE SPEAKS THE LANGUAGES OF LOVE * 1207 01:24:54,308 --> 01:24:59,218 * OOH-OOH-OOH, OOH-OOH AMORE, CHIAMAMI * 1208 01:24:59,252 --> 01:25:00,820 * CHIAMAMI 1209 01:25:00,854 --> 01:25:02,958 * OOH-OOH-OOH, OOH-OOH 1210 01:25:02,991 --> 01:25:06,966 * APPELLE-MOI, MON CHERIE APPELLE-MOI * 1211 01:25:06,999 --> 01:25:08,970 * ANYTIME, ANYPLACE 1212 01:25:09,003 --> 01:25:12,978 * ANYWHERE, ANYWAY 1213 01:25:13,011 --> 01:25:16,486 * ANYTIME, ANYPLACE ANYWHERE, ANY DAY * 1214 01:25:16,519 --> 01:25:20,427 * ANY WAY 1215 01:25:20,460 --> 01:25:34,455 ** 1216 01:25:34,488 --> 01:25:44,542 ** 1217 01:25:44,575 --> 01:25:49,485 ** 1218 01:25:49,518 --> 01:25:52,491 ** 1219 01:25:52,524 --> 01:25:55,664 * CALL ME, MY LOVE 1220 01:25:55,697 --> 01:25:59,505 * CALL ME, CALL ME ANY, ANY TIME * 1221 01:25:59,538 --> 01:26:02,511 * CALL ME FOR A RIDE 1222 01:26:02,544 --> 01:26:06,084 * CALL ME, CALL ME FOR SOME OVERTIME * 1223 01:26:06,117 --> 01:26:09,056 * CALL ME, MY LOVE 1224 01:26:09,090 --> 01:26:12,964 * CALL ME, CALL ME IN A SWEET DESIGN * 1225 01:26:12,998 --> 01:26:15,970 * CALL ME, OHHH-OHH 1226 01:26:16,004 --> 01:26:19,778 * CALL ME, CALL ME CALL ME ANYTIME * 1227 01:26:19,812 --> 01:26:22,718 * CALL ME, CALL ME 1228 01:26:22,751 --> 01:26:26,559 * FOR YOUR LOVER'S LOVER'S ALIBI * 1229 01:26:26,592 --> 01:26:29,465 * CALL ME ON THE LINE 1230 01:26:29,498 --> 01:26:33,138 * CALL ME, CALL ME ANY, ANY TIME * 1231 01:26:33,171 --> 01:26:36,579 * CALL ME, CALL ME 1232 01:26:36,612 --> 01:26:40,487 * JUST CALL ME, CALL ME CALL ME, CALL ME, CALL ME * 1233 01:26:40,520 --> 01:26:43,760 * CALL ME, CALL ME CALL ME, CALL ME, CALL ME * 1234 01:26:43,793 --> 01:26:47,166 * CALL ME, CALL ME CALL ME, CALL ME, CALL ME ** 86681

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.