Original subtitles

- Previously on "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills"...

Erika, Kyle needs some underwear.

- I don't have any. - Oh... oh!

- What am I supposed to say? "Close your legs, darling.

I don't like the view"? I didn't mind the view.

- You've got no undies on. You've got a short dress.

Cross your legs.

This is a cheeky little gift.

- Oh, these are beautiful. - Aren't they?

Since we've all seen your pretty little puss now.

- I'm gonna give you some really good piece of advice

in front of everyone:

the more you talk about sh...,

the worse it gets.

- I have not put alcohol in this smoothie,

but I have thrown a Xanax in.

- People were seeing Rinna's mad moments.

- Well, I was at Eden's house.

We had smoothies... Lisa Rinna, Eden, and I,

and we sort of bonded over Xanax and smoothies.

- There was a conversation at the table...

You were sitting across from me, and you were like,

"Well, she does have this bag of pills,

"and we were talking about Xanax smoothies,

and that that's probably why she reacts the way she does."

- You're saying she reacts that way because she was doing pills.

- Did I say that, Erika?

- I don't remember you saying that,

but you kind of alluded to that.

- But you can't put words in someone's mouth.

- No. I didn't put any words in anybody's mouth.

- Well, no. You did, actually.

[upbeat music]

- The crown is heavy, darlings,

so just leave it where it belongs.

♪ ♪

- I may be two people, but I'm not two-faced.

♪ ♪

- My advice to you: don't hustle the hustler.

♪ ♪

- I speak no evil, but I see and hear everything.

♪ ♪

- When you've traveled the world,

you can speak in any accent you want.

♪ ♪

- I'm an expert on luxury, and I can always spot a fake.

♪ ♪

- Dorit, if you didn't feel like the pills

or the Xanax smoothies was part of her behavior,

why would you bring it up to us at the table?

- I don't remember saying it like that.

- So you don't remember it either!

- No, no, no. I didn't remember saying it like that.

- Listen to my question. - Yeah, go on, Erika.

- If you didn't think that it was part of the behavior,

why bring it up?

- You're sure that that's the conversation...

- No, no, no. Let me finish. Let me finish, Dorit.

You talk a lot. - You don't talk enough.

- I say important sh...

You say too much boring sh...

- You're the only one in this group

that I haven't managed to somehow connect with.

- Because I don't like bullsh..., Dorit,

and that's what I think you are.

- Oh... then why don't you just f... ing say it?

- I just did. - Halle-f... ing-lujah.

Finally, at least we've got a starting point.

- Keep going, Dorit. - Because I don't need

to continue to make an effort.

- Oh, my God.

- I was really nice to you.

- You've never been really nice to me, ever.

- What do you want me to do, Dorit? What do you need?

Like, confirmation all the time?

- I don't need confirmation at all.

- But that's what you're always asking for.

"Oh, you didn't say hello to me."

"Oh, look at you. You gave me a compliment."

That's right, I did.

I love your hair.

- Thank you. - Very fresh.

- That's the first compliment I've ever gotten from you, ever.

- That's not true.

Sometimes, you know, you just got to let people know

just how full of sh... They really are.

I guess now's the right time.

Do you know what? You pick and you pick and you pick,

and you're dying for my attention,

and now you have it.

- Honey...

- Is that not enough for you?

- Honey, don't f... ing flatter yourself.

I'm not dying for your f... ing attention.

- You are dying for my attention.

That's all you've done the whole time.

- [in nasal voice] "You're desperate for my friendship.

You're desperate for my relationship."

Is that what you really think? - No. It's what I know.

- Is that what you f... ing... Where are you?

In which cloud are you living?

- I'm on reality. Where are you?

- You are certainly not in reality.

What on Earth would I need from you, Erika?

You're not that interesting.

You're not f... ing fun.

You're not f... ing nice at all.

You're cold as f... ing ice and stoic.

Why the hell would I be vying for your attention?

- I must have touched a nerve. You're obviously loud.

- I'm not like you, Erika.

- But how do you know Erika? You don't really know Erika.

- I don't know her at all. - You don't know me,

so you're hurling out a lot of judgments.

- I'm giving you my opinion of my...

- But, Dorit, you could not be further away.

- But she always felt that you were saying something...

- But that's not true. - But that's how she felt.

- Let me ask you this: do you think I'm really gonna like you

after everything that happened with the underwear?

- It's a bit of a shock that Erika is raising this now

when it was always that we're perfectly fine,

and she's over it, and it was behind us.

- Is this the end of it?

[together] For me, it is.

- Ah, jinx!

- Okay, that was good. - Okay, good.

- That should tell you something.

- So then say it for crying out loud.

Don't pretend that you're over it.

- I'm not pretending. - You're harboring

this resentment.

- But, Dorit, I'm gonna keep a safe distance from you.

- Well, I think that's what she feels.

- Because you took something that was innocent on my behalf

and you turned it into this whole,

"Oh, she's doing it on purpose,"

"Oh, she's doing it for my husband's attention."

- Erika, let me just say... - You took that

and you ran with that, so congratulations to you.

Does it feel good to tell Dorit, "Go f... yourself"?

Yeah, it does.

- Erika. - Don't do that.

I've done nothing to this woman,

and all she can do is talk about Erika.

- To me, a woman that comes with a short dress

and doesn't cross her legs...

- Are you trying to say that I did that on purpose?

- No one has ever said that! - You know what?

I think you have said that. - Erika!

- And you questioned whether she did it on purpose or not.

- Are you kidding me?

It's one thing if you're, like, with a group of girls,

but when you're actually sitting across from someone's husband...

- Right. - How can you expect someone...

- Not to be looking. - Not to look?

- Yes, you f... ing did.

- When I gave you the underwear, Erika,

it was for a laugh,

and you laughed and you high-fived me.

- Being embarrassed like that is not fun, Dorit.

And being talked about like that is not fun.

- Honey, I did not... - That is not nice

amongst a group of women.

- I know that Dorit thought what she was doing was

actually bringing levity to the situation,

and she thought that Erika would take it in good humor.

I mean, for God's sake, this is a girl

that wears "..." around her neck.

- Had you mentioned it to me, believe me,

I would've absolutely made up for it

and told you I'm so sorry.

- Are you saying that to me now?

- Well, Erika, if you ever tell me,

or anyone here, for that matter,

that I've done something to hurt them,

of course I'm gonna be sorry.

- Well, Dorit, that hurt my feelings.

- Whatever this whole thing about Erika being cold is,

I don't buy it.

There's a person there

who's got a lot of strong feelings.

And yeah, it's a little like, "Wow, here they are,"

but I'm not surprised.

- Believe me, Dorit, I have them.

I know you don't think I do, but I do.

- I question whether you have feelings.

- Well, you know what, then? - Oh, Dorit, come on.

- Come on, Dorit, that's mean. - Everybody has feelings.

- That was a f... ing joke, Rinna.

- No, that wasn't a joke, Dorit.

- Dorit, there's truth in all kidding.

You really think that I'm heartless and cold,

don't you?

- I do think that you're very cold.

- There we go. - I do.

- You have no idea what cold is. None.

- I don't really surround myself with cold people.

- Dorit, forget it. - I just don't.

- Okay, great. - And I certainly don't

vie for their attention or their friendship.

- Then stop talking to me.

Then stop talking to me.

- Honey, that is the easiest thing in the world for me to do.

- You guys, what is really going on here?

What is really... What is it, really?

Why are you so defensive? Why can't you be like,

"I f... ed up. I'm so sorry...'

- Lisa, this is the first time... - "That my husband

"was glaring at your f... ing vagina.

I'm sorry."

- I'm sorry that my husband was glaring at your vagina?

- Well, whatever. - Are you f... ing kidding me?

- I'm not f... ing kidding you.

- What on Earth do you expect a man with a beating heart

to be doing when a girl's vajay-jay's in front of them?

- Oh, my God.

I would never expect Vincent, in a million years,

to sit there and stare up some girl's skirt

who's not wearing underwear.

[dramatic music]

Uh, ew! No!

- And I'm very sorry that these girls made it

very, very big in your head.

- Oh! [laughing] - We did not make it very big,

my friend... you made it very big. - That's not nice, Dorit.

- And I didn't even f... ing know you.

- Lisa. Don't ever get in my face, Lisa.

- I'll get in your face as much as I want.

- I don't... no, no, no, no, no. - Yes, I will.

- I don't think you understand... - Don't f... ing threaten me.

- Don't you ever get in my face, Lisa.

- Dorit, f... off. F... off.

Sorry. You made it big.

- You're so classy. Ask me again my opinion of you.

- Whoa. - Please.

- What's your opinion of me? - What's your opinion of Lisa?

- You got class. - Yeah. You, too, Dorit.

I'm low class? Really?

Oh, from the woman who comes from Connecticut

and uses a fake British/ Australian/South African/

whatever accent.

Come on. Bring it on. More.

- You know what, Dorit? I got to tell you:

I was, like, listening to you...

I'm, like, hearing what you're saying

until you said we made a big deal out of it,

because we did not. - Eileen.

- You lost me there, girlfriend. You lost me there.

- Dorit, all you need to do is take responsibility

for what you do, and you're gonna be fine.

- If I had known that she was upset, I would have.

- But we told you.

- Excuse me. You telling me and her not... do you think that...

- You're so defensive.

- So, shall I apologize to you, then?

- I'm not asking for that. - No!

- That's what I'm saying. You're telling me...

- But you're acting like you had no idea

her feelings were hurt, Dorit,

and I said, "You know what?

I think her feelings were hurt."

- That's not fair.

She meant it like a joke.

- But you don't need to talk for her, Lisa.

You don't need to talk for her. Let her talk.

- Okay, she's my friend. - I know.

- But you're, like, backing her up, and I'm going with her.

- It's okay. It's okay.

- I feel like this is just a bit of a pile-on now.

If they all felt that Dorit's intentions were mean-spirited,

why didn't they say something?

- Kyle told you the same thing. She said she felt blindsided.

- Eileen, but she's telling me something different.

What is the matter with you?

- They basically all thought it was a great idea.

And then suddenly when Erika didn't take it as such a joke,

they all backed off.

That's not fair.

- Erika, I was not looking at all,

nor would I ever, to defame your character

or to make you look bad or to hurt your feelings.

- Well, you did all three, but thanks.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- Coming up...

- Are you okay? - Yes. I'm fine.

- You don't have to be fine, you know, all the time.

[dramatic music]

- Erika, I was not looking at all,

nor would I ever, to defame your character

or to make you look bad or to hurt your feelings.

- Well, you did all three, but thanks.

♪ ♪

Anyone who knows me knows I'm not icy,

but what I don't like is bullsh...,

and that's what this is.

This is total f... ing bullsh...

She's out to humiliate me. Hooray.

You did it.

- Erika, don't go.

Don't go.

Are you okay? - Yes. I'm fine.

- You don't have to be fine, you know, all the time.

I don't like to see anybody cry or anybody hurting.

But she kind of lets you in sometimes

and then pushes you away.

- I don't want to have this conversation.

- But maybe it's all just a mask.

I don't quite understand it.

But clearly the Ice Queen is kind of melting.

♪ ♪

- Tap away.

- Oh, boy. - Aww.

- Ha-ha! You're so sweet. I'm fine.

- Use the inside. - It's okay.

Don't worry about it. I got... it's fine.

Don't worry about it. It's fine.

Don't hug me.

- I have to touch you just for a second.

- I'm more than fine. - I know you're fine.

You're always fine.

- It makes me feel bad to see Erika cry,

because I know that's not something she takes lightly

and does often,

so for Erika to shed a tear,

I know there's a lot going on.

- Great. Let's go. You guys, where are we going now?

- I'm gonna go get it all together.

- Do you want to come... - No.

- Go eat something with us? - I'm just gonna go chill out.

- Go chill, and... - Want to go chill out?

- I'll come with you. - Thank you.

- Very precarious! - Thank you.

- Oh, my God!

- I need to get off this f... ing boat, and I need to go home.

What the f... was that?

- Thank you. Bye-bye. - That felt like...

- Let's go. - A missile attack.

- Thank you. - I mean, a direct, full-on

missile attack.

- Listen. I don't want to end up yelling at anybody.

That's not who I am, but you know,

it's just... it's hard to be, you know,

portrayed as something that you really aren't.

- Well, that's what's not okay.

- You know, it's just not fair. - That's not fair.

- And that's the level of my tears.

It's just, like, f... ing frustrating.

- Mm-hmm. Yeah.

- But you were crying and you look so pretty.

- Thank you so much. - I know. If I cried that pretty

I'd be really happy. - I know... right?

- The thing is... The sad thing is,

I think all of the people that Erika pays

to tell her how fabulous she is

has literally has gotten to her head.

Erika has her glam squad that are with her every day

who she pays to make her look fabulous.

And they tell her, "You're fantastic. You're beautiful.

You're amazing."

I mean, after a while,

how can that not get to somebody's head?

- I think it's just a shame that right at the beginning

she didn't actually just say, "Okay, I can't let this go,"

you know, and really been honest about it.

- Right. - Because when I went out

to see her, she was really crying,

and I haven't seen that kind of vulnerability...

- See, that's the thing. She has such a wall up as it is.

- What's the wall for? I mean...

- Well, people are raised, you know...

How you grow up can affect that, and you know...

- Yeah, but Kyle, I've given so many opportunities,

which she's translated...

- No. I'm saying that's why she didn't tell you.

'Cause she already has a wall up,

so then when that happened, she kind of just shut down.

- What I thought would've happened is

what I think normal people do is go, "Oh, wow. Okay."

- "I'm sorry." - "Maybe I did,

"and maybe I'll give her a call and just say,

'Did I hurt your feelings?'"

- "Gosh, I'm sorry if I did that."

- And that would've changed this entire thing.

- Yeah, but you have to mean that.

- I just don't understand Rinna jumping up like that too

and saying, "F... off."

- I just got in her face when I flipped her off.

[laughter]

- Do you know if PK knows that she stood up

and put her finger in my face... you have no idea.

That would drive him insane. Insane.

- Oh. - I can feel it

calling our name, Lisa.

[heavenly music]

Chanel. - Should we go in?

- I don't like to see anyone upset.

- You're going home. Come on. You're going home.

[all laugh]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Take your wig off. Take it off.

- Oh. Do it. Keep doing it.

- Take it off. - It's kind of hot. [laughs]

- There we go. Okay.

- Well, I'm sorry I got... ugh. I apologize for yelling.

- No, no, no, no, no. - No apologies.

- We're proud of you. - Scooting over to you.

Look at your body language.

- I'm cold, baby. I'm not cut off. I'm just cold.

- [laughs] - I'm not being...

I'm just cold, Eileen.

Thank you. - Aww.

- Thank you, Eileen. - I love you.

- I love you, too. - I really do.

- Thanks. - I see Erika's vulnerability,

and I think I always have.

You're such a good person.

- Thank you. Thank you, babe.

- And having that big explosion in front of everybody is

probably more embarrassing than anything for her.

- Thank you for supporting me.

- Always.

- Erika, it's so nice to get to see you.

- [indistinct], Erika. - Thank you.

- Great woman. - Thanks for the tears,

you bitch. [laughing] - Whatever.

- I'm not doing... Do we get to cry

on the set at the soap?

- It could happen. - Yes. They love it when you cry

on the soap... are you kidding?

- I got to go to bed. You're exhausting.

Most exhausting people I've ever known.

- You guys are killing me. - I thought we were on vacation.

- [laughs] - I've cried more

than I have all year, and I hate you all.

Good night. - [laughs]

♪ ♪

[line trills] - Hi, baby.

- Hi, my love. - How are you doing?

- Ugh. I'm okay.

How are you? How are my babies?

- I'm missing you. The babies are great.

Jagger's having his dinner. - [sighs]

- He asks after you a lot, babe.

- I'm dying... dying being away from the kids.

It's equally as difficult to be away from PK

as it is to be away from my kids.

I have that same dependence on that love.

It's tough. It is tough.

Hong Kong is proving to be more of a confessional than anything.

Um, last night we all went on a boat,

and Erika said, "Oh, you're desperate for my attention.

You're desperate for my friendship."

[both laughing]

- Yeah, you pray for it every day, honey.

- I don't actually believe she could be this deluded.

- Honey, she has a lot of people around her

that give her that attention.

Therefore, she assumes that everybody wants

to be her friend.

It's delusional on a significant scale.

- No. I know. She has been holding this resentment

from Pantygate.

I said, "My God, Erika. It was not intentional to hurt you."

- You're not a nasty person.

You made a joke, and it was based on something she did.

You know, you're there to support Lisa.

Don't let them behave in a certain way to you.

- Please. I birthed both of our children.

There's nothing I can't handle in these parts.

[laughing]

- Coming up...

[all scream] - Shut up!

- That is so mean!

- We're locked in a box, Lisa. - Ah!

- I don't want to do this!

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- But you have to walk so far down.

- I should've texted you and got it for you.

I was actually thinking... - Yeah, but I was busy.

- Good morning. - Hello.

- Hi, ladies. - Hello.

- Tea and coffee. - Oh, hello.

- Do you mind that I'm leaning against your chair?

- You can do whatever you want. You can sit on my lap

if you want. - Thank you. Hi, Dorit.

- Hello, Eden.

- Okay, so, we're going to Buddha.

- Yes.

- I think that's really exciting.

- I've actually been there.

- Hi, you guys.

- Hi, guys. - Hello.

- Hi, ladies. - Good morning.

- How are you doing? - Everyone ready for the Buddha?

- Hello. We are ready. - Buddha, Buddha, Buddha.

- Buddha. - We have a cheer.

- I was told that there are ox there.

Like, sacred oxen that are there that walk around.

- And that we have to walk up a ton of steps to get there.

Is that what's happening? - Yeah. Like 245 steps.

- What? - You'll get your cardio in

today. - Absolutely.

- Oh, my God. 245 steps?

Let's go.

- Dorit is being a downer.

Like this one.

- Okay, well, let's do it. We've got two cars.

- All right. We'll all go. You guys go. Let's go.

♪ ♪

- Go, lady. - Where are we?

- ♪ Let's go to the Buddha ♪

- Do we go up?

- After last night, I'm thinking

that maybe a trip to the Buddha will be a calming,

spiritual experience...

One that we all most definitely need.

- Oh, my God. This is so freaky. Aah!

- Oh, come on. You go snow skiing.

- Oh, my goodness. - What the hell?

Why is the bottom like that?

- Oh, it's glass-bottomed!

- Whoa. That's a little bit freaky.

- I already woke up with anxiety.

Now I'm gonna be flying in the air

looking through the glass bottom.

- You've been snow skiing. It's like this.

- I don't look out a glass bottom.

[Lisa screams] [both scream]

- Shut up! - That is so mean!

- Whoo! Let's take a picture. - This is really cool.

- Oh, my God. - This is really dope.

- Oh, my God. - Whoo!

- Oh, my God. - I'm really freaking...

I don't like this.

[all screaming]

- You guys, you're stressing me out.

- Lisa, please. - Aah!

I mean, there's something about me...

Maybe it's the sadistic part of me...

That makes me want to jump up and down

and rock this carriage

and get them squealing like little piglets.

[all scream]

- This is definitely a little bit of torture.

- You know who's freaking out right now?

I'm telling you Eileen is freaking out right now.

- Really?

[calm music]

- This is so... - This is so cool.

- This is really... This is really cool.

- I'm gonna go see Buddha. - Peaceful up here, actually.

It's very peaceful.

- Oh, my God! - Oh, my God.

- I don't want to do this.

I'm thinking, you know, the gondola's gonna break.

Of course. You always think the gondola's gonna break.

We're locked in a box, Lisa.

The glass bottom's gonna come out.

I'm gonna slip through.

- Aah! - How long is this ride?

I'm going through all these thoughts in my head,

and it's not fun.

My legs are numb and tingling all the way up to my tweeter.

[all laugh]

- Did you just call your vajay-jay your tweeter?

- Yes.

- I'm about to fall asleep.

- You should not be feeling like this going to a Buddha.

- This is bitchin'. - Way bitchin'.

- This thing goes up backwards and forwards all day every day.

I mean, it's way more dangerous having dinner with Lisa Rinna.

- [laughs]

- Oh, here it is! Look! - There he is. He's massive.

- Oh, wow. - Oh, my God.

- Wow. - Yeah. It's impressive.

- Oh, my God. - When are we... can we get out?

- You look like pussies. Really.

That's exactly what you are.

- This is one of those things that you're like, "I did it.

It's done. It's never happening again."

- Were you scared? [together] No!

- Were you? - I'm not even taking

the gondola down if I don't have to.

Do I have to?

[thunder rumbling]

[Asian-inspired music]

♪ ♪

- Where are we going? - Damn it.

- Whoa! Aah! - Oh, my God.

- It's getting worse. - Oh, my God.

- They did say it was gonna rain.

- You said 30% chance, and I thought that meant drizzle.

- Why do we have sunglasses on?

- 'Cause we're from Beverly Hills.

- Clearly, this is Buddha's revenge

on a bunch of angry, stupid chicks invading Hong Kong.

And I am dressed completely inappropriately

in sandals and a summer dress.

Gosh, I feel pretty.

Thank you, Buddha.

- My poor shoes! - Oh, God.

- We look so dumb.

My white pants and my Miu Miu shoes are flooded.

That's what's really, like, the most depressing.

My whole look is ruined.

They're never gonna be the same.

[all screaming]

- Where's everybody else going?

- I don't understand - They're inside

like smart people.

- Aah! - There's a cow.

- Where's a cow? - Yeah, it's a local celebrity.

- Oh, let's go and see him.

He's a beautiful boy.

This boy is very attractive,

and just because I have eight dogs and eight swans

and seven turtles and two little ponies,

it doesn't mean that there's not room for this little guy.

One, two, three. Go smile everybody.

Get in the picture.

- Hey, listen, you've got to tag him.

Ask him if he has an Instagram.

[all laughing]

- This isn't a little animal. This is, like, an ox.

You're not gonna make him do anything he doesn't want to do.

- Shall I straddle him?

- He could knock you the f... out. I wouldn't do that.

- Coming up...

- I feel like there's an elephant at the table.

- Well, did you apologize to Erika?

- Are f... ing kidding me? Really?

- No, she hasn't apologized.

[rain pattering]

- Wow. This is so cool, though.

- It is so cool.

- What's this up here?

- Oh, we got to say a prayer up here, I think,

with the incense.

- You betcha. - I wanted a big one.

I need a big blessing.

- I have definitely burned a lot of incense in my life.

I'm from Southern California, people.

- Ask for a big blessing. - Where's the marshmallows?

I'm praying... I've gone down a few rungs.

You know, you start with world peace.

Now I'm just kind of, like, praying for Hong Kong peace...

amongst the chicks.

Did we do something wrong?

- I'm making a blessing for you,

and for me, and for everyone here.

- I think it's a little cheeky

that you decided to take six blessings

when you were supposed to have one.

- We came to see the largest Buddha in the world.

What is she doing? Brushing your eyebrows?

- Yep. - Portia, good job.

- What is he doing? Shaving his face?

- No. Portia's brushing his eyebrows.

- Are you guys having fun?

- We are. Buddha is amazing. We're about to walk up

to see it right now.

I love you. Good night. Mwah.

- Good night.

[calm music]

♪ ♪

- Gorgeous. Stunning. Awe-inspiring.

- So, we've come this far. I think we should

kind of follow through, don't you?

- Let's go. - Also, some people need

to touch this Buddha

to bring some serenity into the group.

Come on, then. - Onward!

- And she does it in heels. - Oh, my God. I am so soaked.

- It's not freezing. It's just wet.

- A little chilly. A little bit chilly.

- And I'm soaked. - But beautiful.

- My poor shoes!

- Between the rain and the fog and the mist and the Buddha,

it has to have some impact on these women.

It has to.

- Really cool, right? - Right?

- I know. Very cool. - Wow.

- Unbelievable.

- It's breathtaking.

- I mean, look at that. - Incredible.

- He's amazing.

- Let's go eat. Let's go get out of the rain.

- Come on. - Let's go get some souvenirs.

♪ ♪

- I'm really tired, Car.

- Just take a little power nap while I do your lip.

- I can't. I got to go to this dinner.

- You got this.

- Carlene's with me.

She's my glam squad for the trip.

And I don't know what I would do without her.

I just feel like I'm around a few loonies.

And, funny enough, Erika has her glam squad,

and at this moment,

it's just about the only thing we have in common.

It's not easy. Like, even today when we were at the Buddha,

Erika and Lisa Rinna... Not a single word.

No engaging. I mean, I literally felt like, "Oh, my God.

I'm with the Mean Girls."

[upbeat music]

- Erika. - I know, honey.

- Let's go. What are we doing tonight?

Are we serving her her jewel tones moments?

- Yeah. I think we're gonna go jewel tones, berry lip.

- I cannot pull the looks off without the glam squad,

because Erika will be in ponytail,

jeans, and a T-shirt, and no makeup,

'cause that's who I am at my core.

I should take this to dinner and just be like...

[all laughing]

"What was that you were saying? I cannot hear you."

- Just block it. - Just be like, curse words.

- It's a shade blocker. - [laughs]

♪ ♪

- Stupid... what, this sleeve...

- What if I just fell? - No!

- Just, like, all of a sudden did somersaults.

- Have you gone shopping? You need to get your Chanel bag.

- You know, I know. I know. - We can do that tomorrow.

- Tomorrow I guess we're gonna have some time.

- Tonight I'm channeling Samurai Barbie:

Kenzo dress, topknot, braids.

I mean, it's Hong Kong at night. Got to give 'em some sass.

- Where are all the girls? - Hello!

- Hello. - Hello.

- Hey, gorgeous. - Hi, girls.

- Kyle's here! - Let's go!

♪ ♪

- Wow. Gorgeous. - Oh, my God.

- Oh, I love this backdrop.

- Oh, this is beautiful.

- Come on. - It is.

- Oh, no, no, no, no. This is...

- Here, I'm gonna get this building behind you.

- This is really impressive.

- Well, anyway, cheers. Water cheers, girls.

- No. - That's bad luck.

- Bad luck.

- [laughs] - We got to wait.

Toasting with water is bad luck. Hello!

Not yet. Choo!

It's downhill from here.

I mean, we are f... ed.

- Are they just bringing us stuff? This is exciting.

- This one is a green asparagus with white sesame.

We have a little spicy.

This is a crystal [indistinct] with scallion and garlic sauce.

- Thank you. - I'm chowing down, folks.

Here I come. - What is this?

- Pomelo... this is like Chinese grapefruit.

This is vegetarian roe.

- Vegetarian. - Oh, vegetarian.

- Okay, let's try this.

- I feel like there's an elephant at the table.

- Well, did you apologize to Erika about what happened

with the whole thing that went down in the beginning?

- Are you f... ing kidding me? Really?

- Well, Lisa, that's between Dorit and Erika.

- No, she hasn't apologized. - Okay.

- So, what? You weren't wearing any underwear,

and somebody had a flash.

Who cares?

- Listen, I understand you're her friend,

and I hear you defending her...

- No, but I'm trying to minimize it to you and...

- No. You're trying to minimize my feelings.

- No, I'm not. It's no big deal.

I think Erika's making such a huge deal of it.

If she'd just let it go, laughed it off,

it would've passed by now.

- Don't minimize my feelings.

- I'm not minimizing your feelings. I'm trying

to minimize the importance of it to you.

She should've shaken this off...

like she did her knickers.

- By the way, I was trying to help you.

- But, Eileen, when I'm actually saying to her,

"Do you feel that way?"

and she's saying, "No, I'm okay,"

what am I supposed to do at that point?

- Shut your mouth. That's what you're supposed to do.

Drop it and not talk about it and not make it a big deal,

like I would've done for you.

Common f... ing courtesy.

I would've said, "You know what? Maybe I don't know,"

and I would've brought it to you privately,

but you chose to make it a big deal.

He chose to make it a big deal.

"Oh, Erika. Look at her. She puts herself out there.

She must really want to do it."

F... you. No way. That is not right.

- I definitely do not remember at all...

- No, no. You can't play the "don't remember."

- You can't. - You can't play

the "don't remember."

- I find it really hard to believe that Dorit

can't remember, because Dorit's talked to everybody

about the Pantygate.

When I couldn't remember,

I didn't go talk to anybody about it.

I just couldn't remember.

Let me ask you a question.

Do you trust your husband?

- Implicitly. - Okay.

Trust him that you just feel...

- Implicitly, Lisa. You don't have to ask me twice.

- Okay. - Why would you say that

after how upset you got with my sister at saying something...

Like, hey, that's a weird thing to say.

- No, no, no. It's not a weird thing to say,

because why would she be so threatened by Erika

if you really trusted your husband?

- Coming up...

- Don't ever talk about my kid again.

- She would never mean it like that.

- Shut the f... up.

[dramatic music]

- Do you trust your husband? - That's a weird thing to say.

- No, no, no. It's not a weird thing to say,

because why would she be so threatened by Erika

if you really trusted your husband?

Just being real.

- That has nothing to do... Rinna.

- Oh, come on. That's not fair.

- For you to say something like that

after you freaked out about my sister saying,

"Don't talk about my husband,"

- Did you just say, "Let's talk about the husband"?

- Let's not talk about what you don't want out.

Everybody you know...

- You never go near my husband!

- I'm saying to talk about someone's husband like that...

That's what I don't like.

- But wait. You shouldn't talk about someone's wife like that.

- No. Stop! - Wait a second. Wait, wait.

- You guys, shh. Quiet down. - You guys, listen.

I asked... I asked Dorit if she trusted her husband.

- Exactly. What's the intent behind that question?

- She's threatened by Erika flashing her husband.

- No, she's not threatened by her.

- Yes, she is. - No, she's not.

- It was a mistake. Don't bring up the husband.

Hello? You of all people shouldn't bring that up.

- Wait. Why are we giving all of this deference to PK

and none to me?

- I'm not saying that.

I'm saying don't mess with marriages.

Don't mess with marriages. - Don't mess with my marriage!

- I know. - F... that.

Don't mess with my marriage. - I get that.

- And that's exactly what you did.

Oh, look. I'm out there flashing everyone's f... ing husband.

- Bullsh... - No. Don't f... with my mar...

You're worried about her marriage?

F... that! Don't f... with my marriage!

- No. I don't like Rinna saying "You don't trust your husband."

- Exactly. Me too.

- Leave everyone's husbands out of it.

- You know what? It's deeper than this

is what I'm trying to say.

It's not just about Erika having on whatever or not.

What was really f... ing going on that night?

- Erika, you're the most out-there person I know.

- Yes, but it's a stage persona.

I'm a... I'm a real, like, introvert.

- What happened? - You know what was really

going on there? - Tell me. I want to know.

- You know what was really going on that night?

It was seizing upon a moment,

turning it, spinning it, and making me out to be

a f... ing slut... - Why?

- Or a whore... - Why?

- Or trying to seduce someone's husband.

You fill in whatever f... ing adjective you want.

- You guys tell me why. Why? - And you know what?

It's at my expense,

and I'm the one that has to live through that.

- No one was looking to make you out to be

all the things that you...

- But you did. But you did.

You did. - Who cares?

- The only thing I care about is the repercussions of it.

- But what are the repercussions?

- I have to explain a lot of sh...

That sucks.

I'm gonna have to explain this to Tom,

because it's gonna get around, and here's the issue with that:

something that was innocent was taken

and made into something that it's not.

And unfortunately, people don't want to listen to that.

This lives, and this grows.

They would rather listen to bullsh...

They would rather go with sensationalism.

They would rather say, "Yes, she did it on purpose"

instead of saying, "You know what?

She probably didn't, and I feel bad for her."

That's why it's ugly.

- He's gonna believe you. A thousand percent.

He not gonna question it.

- It's annoying to have to deal with that.

- I shouldn't have to do that.

- I can see where she would be concerned by that.

Mauricio would not like that, for sure.

- I told you I was the most sensitive.

- I'm right behind you. - It's funny in the moment

when it dies in the moment.

It's not funny when people's husbands become involved.

It's a bunch of bullsh...

- Erika, I need to say something to you,

because I didn't know all this,

and I feel very bad.

And particularly what you just said right now

about your husband, because that... I didn't...

- Oh, now you thought about it?

Then you know what you can do for me?

You can apologize to my husband.

You can apologize to my husband

for f... ing me through all this sh...

And then I'll be square with you.

You can apologize to him and say, "You know what, Tom?

I f... ed up."

- Okay.

- And then your husband can apologize to him, too.

[dramatic music]

- You can ask me to do whatever,

and if I want to do it, I'll do it.

- Yeah, but you know what? PK knows the truth.

- I don't run PK. I... if he wants to do that...

- You don't? You don't run PK?

- Erika. - You don't run PK?

- I'm certainly not gonna say, "PK, go call Erika's husband

to apologize." - I would do that to my husband.

- I would. I would call. - Listen.

If he chooses to do that...

- I'd be like, "Hey, I did somebody really wrong

and I need your help."

- Dorit, she's in pain. - Why have you not said

a single word to me? - Dorit. Dorit.

- Can you just let me have a conversation with her?

- Dorit, do you see that she's hurting?

- Lisa. - Why are you screaming my name?

- Dorit. - Just be quiet for one second.

- Dorit. - Oh, my God.

- Connect to her. - Can you let me

have a conversation?

- Try to f... ing listen, then. Listen.

- Okay, settle down. Settle down. Settle down.

- I mean, I genuinely think

that Lisa can't physically keep her big lips shut.

- Guys, no. Guys, listen.

- I mean, I don't know. When your lips are that big,

can they just not stop moving or something?

What is this?

- You guys, why don't you listen for a second? Guys.

- I'm talking to her. We're talking together.

- Listen with your heart. - Stop, Lisa.

- We are having a conversation. - Okay.

- Please.

- I don't have anything else to say.

I'm done.

- I don't believe it.

♪ ♪

- This sucks.

- Erika, I am extremely sorry if I hurt your feelings.

It was never intended to hurt your feelings.

I swear on my mother's life.

It's not really a big deal.

- No. You made it a big deal.

- No. - That's not fair.

- You made this a very big deal, Dorit.

- You're right, but you know what?

I really don't think she meant this in a malicious way.

And I don't think she really understood

what she was getting into.

- Eileen, I love you. - I don't think she's evil.

- Eileen, I love you. No one's ever called her evil.

- She's already saying sorry, so then what do you want then?

- No, I mean, it is what it is.

- So there's nothing she can say or do that would make it okay?

- Not really.

- But she didn't... She didn't kill your child,

and she didn't, like...

- Hey, Eileen?

Let's not do that.

- So you're not ready for that.

- I'm not doing sh... right now.

- Okay. - All right?

I don't have to forgive anyone. - You don't have to do anything.

- So let's not do that.

And don't ever bring up killing my child again,

because my child could get killed.

- Okay, I know. I didn't mean it that way.

- No. My child could get killed.

- You're right. I didn't mean it that way.

- What do you mean "killing my child"?

- 'Cause he's a police officer.

I'm saying she didn't commit, like,

some horrible, heinous crime.

- Right. - But also, at a certain point,

we're all human...

- Eileen, don't ever bring up my kid again.

- Okay. I didn't mean... - Don't ever do that.

- I didn't mean it that way.

Figure of speech.

- Eileen, your kid doesn't put on a uniform every night

and put his life out on the line for people he doesn't know.

- I didn't mean it that way.

- Don't ever talk about my kid again.

- But she didn't talk about your kid.

- I didn't talk about your kid.

- Shut the f... up.

- Don't ever talk about my kid again.

- But she didn't talk about your kid.

- Shut the f... up.

- It's okay. It's okay. - You don't know

what I deal with every night. - I don't. Actually I don't.

- That's really insensitive.

Your kid's not out there.

[dramatic music]

Don't you ever do that again. - I won't do it.

- Don't you ever talk about anyone

that puts on a uniform... - I won't.

- And defends or serves their public.

F... you for that.

- I'm sorry.

- [crying]

- I'm really taken aback by Erika's reaction.

- [crying] - Take a deep breath.

- It's like someone's taken over Erika's body.

- She loves you. She didn't mean it like that.

- She actually adores you. She would never mean it like that.

- And poor Eileen's sitting there like, "What have I done?"

- [hyperventilating]

Don't ever talk about my kid again.

- Okay. We're okay.

- My son is under fire every night.

- That's right. - Especially in this climate.

- You know what? - I'm not gonna tolerate

that sh... out of any of you.

- Nobody's doing anything to you, Erika.

- And I don't bring it up, because you know what?

He's an adult, and that's his choice.

[slams table] Don't ever f... ing criticize that.

- Okay, baby.

It's okay.

- [crying, breathing heavily]

- Do you want to walk away? - No. I'm fine.

- Okay. All right.

- You know what? I want to take a moment to honor her son.

- No. That's good. Please don't do that.

- Okay. - My family's not looking

for that.

My son isn't looking for that,

and I'm not looking for that,

which is why I don't talk about it.

Because, you know, I could. I could come and I could say,

"Oh, my God. I'm so scared," and "Oh, my God. I'm so this."

But you know what? I don't.

I think every mother that sends their loved one off to work

knows that harm can come to them.

You know, people lose their lives.

I don't want to talk about it.

You know, it struck a nerve.

That's the one thing you can't say to me.

Don't talk about killing my kid.

Can't take that.

- She adores you. She didn't mean it like that.

- She wasn't saying that. - She did not mean that.

- Really? "It's not like she killed your kid."

My kid could very easily be killed,

and that is the truth that none of you face here.

- I've never meant anything about your son.

You know I have the utmost respect for him.

- Mm-hmm. Sure.

Cool.

- Wow.

- I have to change the subject for a minute.

- Oh, no. [laughs]

- I'm gonna just move it away for a second.

- Just, please, I'm begging you.

- I just have to ask you a question.

I'm just... - One more question, here we go.

- Yeah, I'm gonna. I'm gonna just say it.

I'm leaving, so.

This is my last night in Hong Kong.

I have a QVC date, and so this is my last chance

to really... get everything out.

What I want to know is, when I was at your dinner,

you all got up and left.

Everyone said, "Dorit, you need to get touched up,"

and you all left at the table. Why?

Do you know why?

- After dinner? - Yeah.

- We do that after we're done with dinner.

- But, I mean... but I... I was there sitting by myself.

- I'm going to ask PK why this became such an issue.

- I don't know... What does that mean?

- I don't even know. - I don't know.

Have you ever been at a dinner party

where you're sitting there and the entire table gets up?

- Maybe they hated you. - [laughs]

- I'm just wondering.

- What are you insinuating, is the better question?

- Were people doing coke in your bathroom?

- Oh, come on.

- Are you suggesting that I got up from the dinner table...

- No, no. - And went to do drugs?

- All you have to say is "no."

- No.

- If someone said that to me,

that is a horrible accusation.

- I would be jumping across the table.

- For Lisa Rinna to sink this low

is so offensive it's disgusting.

Come on! - I'm sorry!

I have to be honest about it.

- Lisa!

- Next time on

"The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills"...

- My house is a coke den!

I've got two little babies, but they live in a coke den.

- Low blow, Rinna.

- I don't care... you know low blow better than anybody, hon.

- You really do.

- I think with regards to Rinna,

she's, like, one person one day

and another person in another moment.

You don't really know who you're gonna get.

- There's a term for that.

It's called "schizophrenic."

- [gasps] - Oh!

Both: Bitch. - Oh, my God!

It looks perfect. - What do you think tonight?

You're going to have a great time?

- Well, I hope so.

You seem very melancholy tonight.

- There's very clear tension. - Oh, wow.

Absolutely gorgeous.

- To learn more about the Housewives,

go to bravotv.com.