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1
00:01:20,361 --> 00:01:22,780
- They're for you.
- What am I gonna do with 'em?
2
00:01:22,822 --> 00:01:25,407
We thought you'd like to wear one today.
3
00:01:30,705 --> 00:01:32,039
Shit!
4
00:01:50,725 --> 00:01:54,478
Ok, here comes your night to remember!
5
00:02:03,029 --> 00:02:05,239
Here she comes.
6
00:02:06,449 --> 00:02:09,910
She's almost got it. She's almost got it!
7
00:02:10,745 --> 00:02:11,912
She's got it!
8
00:02:13,456 --> 00:02:16,083
Come on, shit for brains!
9
00:03:12,682 --> 00:03:15,141
What do you mean,
break pee wee's cherry?
10
00:03:15,142 --> 00:03:17,894
If you're not cherry,
you don't get Wendy.
11
00:03:17,937 --> 00:03:22,437
I'm cherry. You could put me on
top of a banana split, I'm so cherry.
12
00:03:50,636 --> 00:03:54,806
Make it mine. Make it mine.
13
00:03:54,807 --> 00:03:56,892
Please make it mine.
14
00:04:11,490 --> 00:04:13,700
I got laid!
15
00:04:15,953 --> 00:04:18,580
I got laid. I tore her up.
16
00:04:21,208 --> 00:04:23,418
She's ruined.
17
00:04:24,545 --> 00:04:25,546
She's ruined.
18
00:04:41,937 --> 00:04:44,147
Where's stiffy? Stiffy!
19
00:04:47,651 --> 00:04:51,613
Maybe it doesn't work
for a couple of days after you get laid.
20
00:04:52,364 --> 00:04:54,783
Up, you big husky! Up!
21
00:04:57,036 --> 00:04:59,121
Shit.
22
00:05:00,206 --> 00:05:03,667
Marilyn Monroe.
23
00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:09,381
Jayne Mansfield.
24
00:05:11,550 --> 00:05:13,760
Shit!
25
00:05:51,173 --> 00:05:53,466
Got a bad rash, mom.
26
00:05:53,467 --> 00:05:56,094
Hurts like heck.
27
00:05:57,304 --> 00:05:59,556
I don't think I'll ask.
28
00:06:30,087 --> 00:06:32,797
- Hey, Casanova!
- Hey, stud, how does it feel?
29
00:06:32,798 --> 00:06:35,300
Listen, about this Shakespeare crap.
30
00:06:35,301 --> 00:06:37,511
- Shakespeare crap?
- Stop!
31
00:06:38,429 --> 00:06:40,597
You're getting me in
trouble with mother.
32
00:06:40,598 --> 00:06:43,182
It's not my fault your
mom's a drama teacher.
33
00:06:43,183 --> 00:06:45,518
Look. Just because you don't
mind running around looking
34
00:06:45,561 --> 00:06:47,729
like a jerk, my mother thinks
i shouldn't mind either.
35
00:06:47,730 --> 00:06:49,815
Shakespeare's good for you.
It'll broaden your mind.
36
00:06:49,857 --> 00:06:51,482
Shakespeare's ass
sucks canal water.
37
00:06:51,483 --> 00:06:54,235
Oh his ass sucks canal water.
That's very profound.
38
00:06:54,236 --> 00:06:57,155
- He has a keen analytical mind.
- And a way with words.
39
00:06:57,156 --> 00:07:01,034
Hey, pee wee. How's what feel?
Getting laid.
40
00:07:01,035 --> 00:07:04,787
- Same as it always feels.
- Oh, I don't believe it. Never again.
41
00:07:04,788 --> 00:07:08,041
What are you guys talking about?
I got bodies laid all over south Florida.
42
00:07:08,042 --> 00:07:11,169
Morris, the last time you got any action
was with your fist. You know, Rosie palm.
43
00:07:11,170 --> 00:07:14,714
You guys are jealous because
i ruined Wendy for everybody else.
44
00:07:14,715 --> 00:07:18,134
- Oh, no!
- Now that she's had me, what's left?
45
00:07:18,135 --> 00:07:20,762
Yeah, well, that's not what she told me.
46
00:07:21,472 --> 00:07:25,142
- What did she tell you?
- Ask her, pee wee. Here she comes.
47
00:07:26,310 --> 00:07:28,603
Yeah, I can hear her pantin' from here.
48
00:07:28,646 --> 00:07:30,939
Look man. When they've been
had by pee wee Morris,
49
00:07:30,981 --> 00:07:33,274
they stay had. I mean they can't
keep their hands off me.
50
00:07:33,317 --> 00:07:35,319
You guys better watch
out, cause when she sees
51
00:07:35,361 --> 00:07:37,236
me your libel to get
caught in the stampede.
52
00:07:37,237 --> 00:07:38,238
Watch this.
53
00:07:38,364 --> 00:07:40,574
Hi, boys.
54
00:07:41,909 --> 00:07:44,202
- She's in a frenzy.
- She's rabid.
55
00:07:44,203 --> 00:07:46,038
She didn't see me, she
didn't know I was here.
56
00:07:46,080 --> 00:07:47,872
That's what she said
about you last night.
57
00:07:47,873 --> 00:07:49,832
Oh, man. The girl's my slave.
58
00:07:49,833 --> 00:07:51,918
Wendy!
59
00:07:52,544 --> 00:07:54,629
Hey, Wendy!
60
00:07:54,630 --> 00:07:58,716
- Hey, baby. How's tricks?
- You talkin' to me?
61
00:07:58,717 --> 00:08:01,552
Well, yeah. I'm talkin' to you.
How you feelin'?
62
00:08:01,553 --> 00:08:05,807
To tell you the truth, I'm a little horny.
I haven't had too much action lately.
63
00:08:05,808 --> 00:08:07,351
Is that so?
64
00:08:07,434 --> 00:08:11,934
In fact, if I don't get next to a man soon,
I'm gonna be in real trouble.
65
00:08:12,856 --> 00:08:15,358
You guys are as funny as a rubber crutch.
66
00:08:15,693 --> 00:08:16,652
Thanks a lot, kid.
67
00:08:16,694 --> 00:08:19,446
Oh, pee wee, come on.
It's just a little joke.
68
00:08:19,530 --> 00:08:22,865
They made me do it. They said
they'd never let me see you again.
69
00:08:22,866 --> 00:08:26,244
If that happened,
I'd just have to go into a convent.
70
00:08:26,286 --> 00:08:30,786
I mean, after you, where's a girl to go?
It's all downhill from here.
71
00:08:30,958 --> 00:08:34,962
- That's what I was tryin' to tell 'em.
- Well, you were right.
72
00:08:35,504 --> 00:08:38,965
- When?
- How about lunchtime?
73
00:08:38,966 --> 00:08:41,175
- Ok.
- Gotta go. See you later.
74
00:08:41,176 --> 00:08:43,344
Bye.
75
00:08:46,890 --> 00:08:50,268
Look closer. That is the world's
record shit-eatin' grin.
76
00:08:50,269 --> 00:08:53,188
- I don't know how you do it, pee wee.
- I'm an artist.
77
00:08:53,230 --> 00:08:57,730
Michelangelo worked in stone.
Van gogh worked in oil. I work in pussy.
78
00:08:59,695 --> 00:09:02,947
- He works in pussy.
- At least he's consistent.
79
00:09:02,948 --> 00:09:05,825
- Let's get him.
- I think he needs some more.
80
00:09:06,452 --> 00:09:08,662
I think he does.
81
00:09:08,787 --> 00:09:10,997
Hey, pee wee!
82
00:09:11,707 --> 00:09:13,625
Look seriously, lf you
got all this pussy lyin'
83
00:09:13,667 --> 00:09:15,710
around, I think you should
share with your buddies.
84
00:09:15,711 --> 00:09:18,880
- I mean we share with you.
- Oh, yeah. Like cherry forever.
85
00:09:18,881 --> 00:09:21,842
A mere dalliance, my boy.
Affectionately done life experience.
86
00:09:21,884 --> 00:09:24,511
Everybody oughta learn to run from
big colored guys with machetes.
87
00:09:24,553 --> 00:09:26,471
Yeah, and as early in life as possible.
88
00:09:26,513 --> 00:09:29,766
Anyway, I think it's pretty awful if you
don't fix us up with some of your stuff.
89
00:09:29,767 --> 00:09:32,977
- Sure, I'll fix you up.
- Yeah? When?
90
00:09:32,978 --> 00:09:35,646
- Well, hell, any time.
- How about tomorrow night?
91
00:09:35,647 --> 00:09:38,399
Tomorrow night? Well now wait a
minute, it might take me
92
00:09:38,400 --> 00:09:41,027
a couple of days to line
up some first-class stuff.
93
00:09:41,028 --> 00:09:44,489
I gotta talk 'em into goin' for some other
guys. I mean, you know they're pretty loyal.
94
00:09:44,490 --> 00:09:47,034
- Oh, yeah. I can imagine.
- Of course they would be.
95
00:09:47,159 --> 00:09:48,368
Makes sense to me.
96
00:09:50,370 --> 00:09:52,455
Shit.
97
00:10:01,006 --> 00:10:03,216
Hi.
98
00:10:03,634 --> 00:10:06,052
- You still suspended?
- Three more days.
99
00:10:06,053 --> 00:10:07,888
Shit.
100
00:10:15,938 --> 00:10:17,980
You're right. 5:10 on the nose.
101
00:10:17,981 --> 00:10:21,317
I told you.
She goes to the bathroom 5:10 every day.
102
00:10:21,318 --> 00:10:25,071
- Every day?
- Every day. 5:10 every day.
103
00:10:25,072 --> 00:10:27,365
You can set your watch by it.
104
00:10:27,491 --> 00:10:30,701
- She's German, you know.
- Very interesting.
105
00:10:30,702 --> 00:10:35,202
Yeah? What's so interesting about when
miss balbricker goes to the bathroom?
106
00:10:35,457 --> 00:10:38,543
A little experiment i
got for zoology class.
107
00:10:38,544 --> 00:10:40,754
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
108
00:10:49,930 --> 00:10:53,141
- Hey, stemrick!
- What do you want, pee wee?
109
00:10:53,183 --> 00:10:55,184
Listen, you get a lot
of action, just like me.
110
00:10:55,185 --> 00:10:56,144
Yeah, I get my share sure.
111
00:10:56,186 --> 00:10:58,665
Listen, I promised to set Turner and some
of the guys up with some pussy ya know?
112
00:10:58,689 --> 00:11:00,732
They haven't been getting much lately.
113
00:11:01,024 --> 00:11:03,151
Except I don't wanna give
'em my choice stuff.
114
00:11:03,152 --> 00:11:05,112
I mean these guys are
pretty inexperienced.
115
00:11:05,154 --> 00:11:06,613
Yeah, you don't wanna do that.
116
00:11:06,655 --> 00:11:09,615
Right, so anyway I was wondering if you
knew a broad that's a real pushover.
117
00:11:09,616 --> 00:11:12,326
Somebody a real idiot could score with.
118
00:11:12,327 --> 00:11:15,163
Hell, man. That's easy. Wendy Williams.
119
00:11:18,375 --> 00:11:21,002
- Hey, stemrick.
- Yeah?
120
00:11:21,003 --> 00:11:23,714
Your sister sucks rhinoceros dicks.
121
00:11:27,050 --> 00:11:29,260
I wonder what he meant by that?
122
00:11:31,096 --> 00:11:34,640
Hold your splits, girls. Hold your splits.
123
00:11:34,641 --> 00:11:37,769
All right, let's get ready
for the tongue exercise. Ready?
124
00:11:37,811 --> 00:11:41,439
All right. Up! Out! Right! Left! Down!
125
00:11:41,648 --> 00:11:43,483
Up! Out! Right! Left!
126
00:11:43,692 --> 00:11:46,402
Hey, you guys what the hell
did pee wee do to stemrick?
127
00:11:46,403 --> 00:11:49,113
He's pissed as shit and lookin'
for pee wee everywhere.
128
00:11:49,114 --> 00:11:53,614
I think he asked big John if he could
fix us up with his sister for a gang bang.
129
00:11:53,785 --> 00:11:58,285
Could be. He's desperate enough. Boys, i
think we got his ass in a sling this time.
130
00:11:58,707 --> 00:12:00,667
Yeah, well. Serves him right.
131
00:12:03,629 --> 00:12:05,296
Hey, Billy?
132
00:12:05,297 --> 00:12:09,675
- What kinda role you playin'?
- I'm playin' a couple of roles, actually.
133
00:12:09,676 --> 00:12:12,803
I'm doin' different scenes
from different plays.
134
00:12:12,804 --> 00:12:15,848
- What roles?
- MacBeth.
135
00:12:15,933 --> 00:12:18,560
- I heard of that.
- Yeah.
136
00:12:20,229 --> 00:12:22,397
What's the other role?
137
00:12:23,732 --> 00:12:27,902
- Oberon.
- Oberon? Who's he?
138
00:12:29,571 --> 00:12:32,407
He's sort of like a... forest ranger.
139
00:12:33,533 --> 00:12:36,244
A forest ranger? In Shakespeare?
140
00:12:36,245 --> 00:12:40,539
Yeah. He looks after the woods. You know.
141
00:12:40,540 --> 00:12:41,707
Looks after the woods?
142
00:12:41,708 --> 00:12:44,460
Yes. He sorta runs
around in the woods a lot.
143
00:12:45,545 --> 00:12:49,006
- He sounds like a fairy to me.
- He's not just a fairy.
144
00:12:50,259 --> 00:12:52,886
He's the king of the fairies.
145
00:12:52,970 --> 00:12:56,515
Oh, you mean like a really big fairy.
146
00:12:57,349 --> 00:13:00,059
You guys are really funny.
147
00:13:00,060 --> 00:13:01,811
Hysterical.
148
00:13:01,853 --> 00:13:05,273
Come on, guys. Let's get serious.
This is art here.
149
00:13:05,274 --> 00:13:08,777
- I think it's really admirable, Billy.
- I bet you do.
150
00:13:11,071 --> 00:13:13,698
So.
151
00:13:13,699 --> 00:13:16,284
So you're playin' a big fairy?
152
00:13:16,285 --> 00:13:18,494
Yeah.
153
00:13:18,495 --> 00:13:20,580
Well, that's good casting.
154
00:13:22,541 --> 00:13:24,751
Hey, Turner, suck my wand!
155
00:13:34,136 --> 00:13:37,264
- Frank.
- What's up, pee wee?
156
00:13:40,851 --> 00:13:43,830
Listen, how would you like to get back
at Turner for that cherry forever gag?
157
00:13:43,854 --> 00:13:45,707
Oh boy, you know I would.
Why, whatcha got in mind?
158
00:13:45,731 --> 00:13:46,523
I'll tell ya later.
159
00:13:46,524 --> 00:13:48,835
First we gotta find a broad who
they'll believe is ready for a gang bang.
160
00:13:48,859 --> 00:13:50,443
You know, a real push over.
161
00:13:50,444 --> 00:13:53,696
You mean someone who's like a door knob?
Everybody takes a turn?
162
00:13:53,697 --> 00:13:57,074
- It's easy. Wendy Williams.
- Never mind Wendy Williams. Somebody else.
163
00:13:57,075 --> 00:14:01,575
- Somebody that they don't know.
- All right. Let me see.
164
00:14:01,997 --> 00:14:04,457
There's this girl in the
band, big edna, is supposed
165
00:14:04,499 --> 00:14:06,625
to be hot. I heard, mind you.
I wasn't there.
166
00:14:06,626 --> 00:14:10,588
I heard she was about to take on 20 guys
on the way back home from the Daytona trip.
167
00:14:10,589 --> 00:14:13,758
Some of the fruitcakes in the band
didn't know what to do.
168
00:14:13,967 --> 00:14:17,428
- It figures. Big edna.
- I mean big. Six foot.
169
00:14:17,429 --> 00:14:20,681
Listen, pee wee.
Take this over to that lab monitor for me.
170
00:14:20,682 --> 00:14:22,892
- Oh, yeah. Sure.
- Thanks.
171
00:14:44,331 --> 00:14:46,541
Gee, that's very funny, Morris.
172
00:15:24,246 --> 00:15:26,456
Pee wee.
173
00:15:35,632 --> 00:15:37,800
Pee wee, it's not that bad.
174
00:15:37,801 --> 00:15:40,220
Just tell those guys you
polled all the members of your
175
00:15:40,262 --> 00:15:42,763
harem and they don't want to
make it with a bunch of jerks.
176
00:15:42,764 --> 00:15:45,892
- That's what you'd do, huh?
- I don't have a harem.
177
00:15:45,976 --> 00:15:48,061
Oh, that's not what I hear.
178
00:15:50,814 --> 00:15:53,524
What'd you hear?
179
00:15:53,525 --> 00:15:57,903
I was asking who's the biggest pushover
in school. You know what everybody said?
180
00:15:57,904 --> 00:15:59,989
- Wendy Williams?
- Right.
181
00:16:00,949 --> 00:16:03,993
Geez pee wee, it can't be the first time
you've heard that stuff.
182
00:16:03,994 --> 00:16:06,454
- Well that's different.
- Why?
183
00:16:06,496 --> 00:16:08,581
Well before, I wanted it to be true.
184
00:16:10,542 --> 00:16:12,627
And I guess now I don't.
185
00:16:14,921 --> 00:16:17,924
Well, that's good. Because it's not true.
186
00:16:19,301 --> 00:16:21,511
- It isn't?
- No.
187
00:16:23,180 --> 00:16:24,264
You don't believe me?
188
00:16:24,306 --> 00:16:27,516
You went on the bus with me, just
like that. No questions asked.
189
00:16:27,517 --> 00:16:30,436
That's like the old
joke "i wouldn't belong"
190
00:16:30,437 --> 00:16:33,398
to any club that would
have me as a member."
191
00:16:34,107 --> 00:16:36,400
Pee wee, don't you know why I did that?
192
00:16:36,401 --> 00:16:38,611
Yeah. The bet with Tommy.
193
00:16:40,030 --> 00:16:42,240
I did it because I liked you
194
00:16:42,949 --> 00:16:46,076
and because I wanted to.
195
00:16:46,077 --> 00:16:47,661
You did?
196
00:16:47,829 --> 00:16:48,830
Uh huh.
197
00:16:49,873 --> 00:16:53,835
- You do it every time you want to?
- Yup. Every time I want to.
198
00:16:56,213 --> 00:16:59,341
It's just that I've only
wanted to three times.
199
00:17:00,800 --> 00:17:02,968
Really?
200
00:17:04,971 --> 00:17:07,056
Tommy - you knew that.
201
00:17:07,098 --> 00:17:09,683
Some guy you don't know at summer camp.
202
00:17:09,684 --> 00:17:11,894
And you.
203
00:17:14,147 --> 00:17:17,816
Well, why are all these assholes
talking about you like that?
204
00:17:17,817 --> 00:17:20,277
Because most guys are so
desperate, they'll lie
205
00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:22,905
about anybody to make
themselves look like studs.
206
00:17:22,906 --> 00:17:27,285
Didn't you ever brag about some girl
you never really made it with?
207
00:17:27,786 --> 00:17:30,829
Well, I can't believe
they'd make all that up.
208
00:17:30,830 --> 00:17:33,040
You know how I got my reputation?
209
00:17:33,750 --> 00:17:36,001
In the eighth grade.
210
00:17:36,002 --> 00:17:38,254
I didn't know anything. I mean...
211
00:17:40,549 --> 00:17:43,802
These guys tried to get me
to go skinny-dipping.
212
00:17:44,302 --> 00:17:48,264
I didn't want to, but I didn't care
if they did so I watched.
213
00:17:49,224 --> 00:17:51,433
I thought it was funny, you know.
214
00:17:51,434 --> 00:17:53,602
Flopping around.
215
00:17:54,396 --> 00:17:56,564
Oh, god.
216
00:17:56,565 --> 00:17:59,818
The next day in school, I was a slut.
217
00:18:00,235 --> 00:18:02,737
I mean, the original mattress-back.
218
00:18:06,783 --> 00:18:08,993
I got used to it.
219
00:18:10,036 --> 00:18:12,246
What do they know about me?
220
00:18:13,081 --> 00:18:16,000
I do what I want.
I don't care what anybody thinks.
221
00:18:17,544 --> 00:18:20,380
Well... I mean, don't
you care what I think?
222
00:18:22,048 --> 00:18:23,049
Uh huh.
223
00:18:24,759 --> 00:18:26,969
I care.
224
00:18:28,597 --> 00:18:30,890
But I can't tell you what to think.
225
00:18:33,059 --> 00:18:35,311
I can only tell you the truth.
226
00:18:40,358 --> 00:18:42,860
Oh, boy.
227
00:18:42,861 --> 00:18:45,697
Well? We gonna be buddies?
228
00:18:46,406 --> 00:18:48,616
Well first, I'm gonna
have to get into shape.
229
00:18:48,617 --> 00:18:51,077
Yeah, why?
230
00:18:51,119 --> 00:18:54,163
Why? Cos I'm gonna kick the
shit out of these guys!
231
00:18:54,205 --> 00:18:57,124
I don't want 'em talkin'
about my girl like that.
232
00:19:03,632 --> 00:19:06,092
Come on, kids! Let's go.
233
00:19:06,760 --> 00:19:09,679
- Shit.
- That's your cue.
234
00:19:10,639 --> 00:19:14,308
By the way, we got somethin' cookin'
for your cherry forever revenge.
235
00:19:14,309 --> 00:19:16,810
Who's "we" and how
did you know about that?
236
00:19:16,811 --> 00:19:19,229
"We" is Brian and me. And
what do you mean, how
237
00:19:19,230 --> 00:19:21,607
do I know? You don't think
i look after my guy.
238
00:19:21,608 --> 00:19:24,902
- We even know where to get the girl.
- Don't worry. I got a lead.
239
00:19:24,903 --> 00:19:25,862
Now what's the plan?
240
00:19:25,904 --> 00:19:28,823
We're still workin' on it.
I'll tell you everything tonight.
241
00:19:47,217 --> 00:19:49,427
Big edna?
242
00:19:56,518 --> 00:19:59,187
- Hi. I'm pee wee Morris.
- I know.
243
00:19:59,229 --> 00:20:01,605
You do? Ah, well, that figures.
244
00:20:01,606 --> 00:20:03,774
Listen edna, I heard you
had a little problem
245
00:20:03,817 --> 00:20:05,819
with the boys in the
band the other night.
246
00:20:05,944 --> 00:20:06,944
Huh?
247
00:20:06,945 --> 00:20:11,323
Edna, I have some guys that won't
let you down. You know what I mean?
248
00:20:11,324 --> 00:20:12,324
No.
249
00:20:12,325 --> 00:20:16,537
Come on, edna. A big girl like you takes
a lot of men to keep you satisfied, right?
250
00:20:16,579 --> 00:20:21,079
- What are you talking about?
- Come on, you know what I'm talkin' about!
251
00:20:21,418 --> 00:20:24,337
- I don't.
- Edna, come here.
252
00:20:24,963 --> 00:20:27,465
- I wonder what he's up to.
- Who knows.
253
00:20:30,301 --> 00:20:33,095
- What do you think?
- No way.
254
00:20:33,096 --> 00:20:35,598
Gang bang?
255
00:20:42,355 --> 00:20:44,982
Dirty, rotten, filthy little creep!
256
00:20:46,526 --> 00:20:50,279
- Are you ok?
- I take it that was a no.
257
00:20:50,280 --> 00:20:52,740
- She's thinking it over.
- You're funny.
258
00:20:52,741 --> 00:20:56,285
Look, don't worry about it.
We'll switch to plan b.
259
00:20:56,286 --> 00:20:58,454
Plan b? I don't even
know what plan a was.
260
00:20:58,496 --> 00:20:59,830
Here's what we'll do.
261
00:21:00,206 --> 00:21:02,416
Yet I will try the last.
262
00:21:03,251 --> 00:21:04,919
Lay on, macduff,
263
00:21:05,003 --> 00:21:09,503
and damn'd be he
that first cries "hold, enough!"
264
00:21:10,550 --> 00:21:12,635
No, not you.
265
00:21:13,136 --> 00:21:16,681
Shakespeare. The... play.
266
00:21:22,604 --> 00:21:25,939
- God I'm glad I don't have to eat these.
- Hey ah Wendy, you seen Billy around?
267
00:21:25,940 --> 00:21:28,484
Don't bug him you guys,
he's studying his role.
268
00:21:28,485 --> 00:21:30,486
Yeah he's studying his role,
you ignorant oafs.
269
00:21:30,487 --> 00:21:32,237
Right, I got a
role he can study.
270
00:21:32,238 --> 00:21:34,865
He's not ready for a
role that big, yet meat.
271
00:21:35,867 --> 00:21:37,534
Hey. Mickey!
272
00:21:37,535 --> 00:21:39,203
Suckers.
273
00:21:39,329 --> 00:21:41,539
Hey, mccarty.
274
00:21:42,123 --> 00:21:44,208
Can we have your autograph?
275
00:21:44,209 --> 00:21:48,709
Look, you guys, when I become a big star
and I'm rubbing elbows with Ava gardner,
276
00:21:48,922 --> 00:21:51,673
you're the first people
i intend to forget.
277
00:21:51,674 --> 00:21:53,050
That's Hollywood.
278
00:21:53,051 --> 00:21:56,512
"Gentle puck, come hither."
What the fuck's a puck?
279
00:21:56,513 --> 00:22:01,013
It's a character. It's a friend of oberon's.
He's like a... a little forest ranger.
280
00:22:02,685 --> 00:22:05,562
- Puck? A little forest ranger?
- Yes.
281
00:22:05,563 --> 00:22:08,065
- Well, who plays that part?
- Pee wee.
282
00:22:08,066 --> 00:22:11,027
Oh. So pee wee plays the
little fairy and you
283
00:22:11,069 --> 00:22:13,821
play a big fairy. That's
a lot of fairies.
284
00:22:13,822 --> 00:22:16,824
You guys get to run around
the woods together?
285
00:22:16,825 --> 00:22:21,325
You guys must be really proud of your
ignorance cos you show it off so much.
286
00:22:31,965 --> 00:22:34,384
- John Henry.
- Yes, I know.
287
00:22:35,635 --> 00:22:38,554
Tell Mrs. Morris I'll take the part.
288
00:22:38,555 --> 00:22:41,474
I will. I'm glad.
289
00:22:46,563 --> 00:22:50,190
- Is he in the show?
- Well, he is now.
290
00:22:50,191 --> 00:22:54,152
- He's a seminole.
- Observant, Tim. Real observant.
291
00:22:54,153 --> 00:22:58,653
No, no, no. I just meant that...
Some people might not care for that.
292
00:22:59,701 --> 00:23:02,328
- Well, it's all right with me.
- Me too.
293
00:23:04,205 --> 00:23:06,623
- So we're gonna see the broad tonight?
- Tonight, right.
294
00:23:06,624 --> 00:23:08,459
Do you really think
they're gonna go for it?
295
00:23:08,501 --> 00:23:09,751
Long as you keep your cool.
296
00:23:09,752 --> 00:23:12,171
Look just think of it
as an acting lesson.
297
00:23:12,213 --> 00:23:13,214
Cool. Right.
298
00:23:16,217 --> 00:23:17,218
Hey, the door.
Right.
299
00:23:17,760 --> 00:23:19,470
Don't forget tomorrow
night at 11 o'clock.
300
00:23:19,512 --> 00:23:20,054
Right.
301
00:23:20,138 --> 00:23:22,431
It's gonna work, right?
Graveyard Gloria, right?
302
00:23:22,432 --> 00:23:23,182
Right.
303
00:23:23,183 --> 00:23:25,267
- Cool, right?
- Right.
304
00:23:28,271 --> 00:23:30,523
You could be the biggest
fairy of 'em all.
305
00:23:30,565 --> 00:23:31,524
Eat my shorts.
306
00:23:31,525 --> 00:23:34,526
(He)'. You guys, how they hangin'?
307
00:23:34,527 --> 00:23:37,195
Oh will you cut it out, for Christ's sake!
I come here with an offer
308
00:23:37,196 --> 00:23:39,907
of a lifetime and you act like children.
It's embarrassing.
309
00:23:39,908 --> 00:23:44,161
- We're sorry pee wee. What's your offer?
- Forget it. Billy, let's go.
310
00:23:44,162 --> 00:23:47,141
You wanna sample the greatest ass in five
counties? Just nod if you're speechless.
311
00:23:47,165 --> 00:23:48,499
What piece of ass is this?
312
00:23:48,541 --> 00:23:51,168
Get this. By day, a
mild-mannered librarian.
313
00:23:51,210 --> 00:23:53,629
She talks in a whisper. Looks
like a buttoned-up icebox.
314
00:23:53,630 --> 00:23:56,089
But you get her within breathing
distance of a cemetery and you better
315
00:23:56,090 --> 00:23:58,258
hold on to your dicks, because
she'll ride you into the ground!
316
00:23:58,259 --> 00:24:01,929
I'm not kiddin'. They call her
"graveyard Gloria, the fuck of death."
317
00:24:01,930 --> 00:24:06,099
I got it all lined up! You wanna act like
men for a change and take a shot at this?
318
00:24:06,100 --> 00:24:08,329
I don't know. What do you say?
Do you wanna give her a shot?
319
00:24:08,353 --> 00:24:10,812
I'd give her a shot, but it might
spoil it for the rest of you.
320
00:24:10,813 --> 00:24:13,565
Well hell why not? I mean if pee wee found
her she's gotta have some curiosity value.
321
00:24:13,566 --> 00:24:15,692
I got it all worked out for you all right.
322
00:24:15,693 --> 00:24:19,363
- How about you, mccarty?
- Oh, I just love graveyards.
323
00:24:19,364 --> 00:24:21,991
- But can't we rehearse first?
- Sure, Billy.
324
00:24:23,326 --> 00:24:25,410
See you, rock.
325
00:24:25,411 --> 00:24:28,664
- Graveyard Gloria, my ass.
- I wonder where he dug her up?
326
00:24:28,665 --> 00:24:31,416
Hey that's funny. I mean it's not as funny
as your face, but it's funny.
327
00:24:31,417 --> 00:24:33,961
The little booger's up
to something sure as shit.
328
00:24:34,003 --> 00:24:36,421
Yeah we're gonna have
to keep start keeping an eye on him.
329
00:24:36,422 --> 00:24:39,591
How we gonna do that?
He's in rehearsal all day.
330
00:24:40,843 --> 00:24:43,887
Well, Anthony, you always
wanted to be an actor.
331
00:24:43,888 --> 00:24:46,306
Me, an actor? No fuckin' way.
332
00:24:46,307 --> 00:24:50,185
You gotta be kiddin'. It'll never happen.
Count on it.
333
00:25:04,283 --> 00:25:06,576
Thanks for coming by, Anthony.
334
00:25:06,619 --> 00:25:10,080
You know I just figured I'd... kinda like,
ask you a question.
335
00:25:10,081 --> 00:25:13,084
I mean, is this guy, like... ls he, like...
336
00:25:17,672 --> 00:25:19,340
No.
337
00:25:19,424 --> 00:25:22,468
Well how come he has to wear,
you know, clothes like this?
338
00:25:22,969 --> 00:25:25,179
Well, he's pretending to be a girl.
339
00:25:26,431 --> 00:25:29,684
Just pretending? Ok.
340
00:25:30,518 --> 00:25:33,353
Will you read thisbe's speech on page 120?
341
00:25:33,354 --> 00:25:35,064
Yeah.
342
00:25:35,481 --> 00:25:39,981
"O wall, full often
hast thou heard my moans."
343
00:25:41,946 --> 00:25:44,448
That's pretty good, huh?
344
00:25:44,449 --> 00:25:47,702
Anthony, can you get
your voice a little higher?
345
00:25:47,827 --> 00:25:48,827
Huh?
346
00:25:48,828 --> 00:25:51,038
Well, he's pretending to be a girl.
347
00:25:55,209 --> 00:25:58,045
Fimy cherry ups-nu
348
00:25:59,881 --> 00:26:03,217
a little higher, Anthony. Come on.
349
00:26:04,677 --> 00:26:08,138
"And I like Helen, till the fates me..."
350
00:26:08,473 --> 00:26:10,640
This isn't gonna work.
351
00:26:10,641 --> 00:26:13,727
I just got a naturally deep voice.
You know.
352
00:26:13,770 --> 00:26:17,273
I just naturally got a man's voice.
353
00:26:54,435 --> 00:26:56,562
Really neat disguise.
354
00:26:56,604 --> 00:26:58,689
Yeah!
355
00:27:00,149 --> 00:27:02,776
I think I'm going to regret this.
356
00:27:48,614 --> 00:27:50,699
Shit.
357
00:27:52,285 --> 00:27:55,328
Graveyard Gloria huh?
Why not? Sounds like fun.
358
00:27:55,329 --> 00:27:57,622
- You got a deal.
- Gee that's great.
359
00:27:57,915 --> 00:27:59,875
Rex, shut up!
360
00:27:59,917 --> 00:28:02,127
Gosh, he's so possessive.
361
00:28:02,837 --> 00:28:06,798
- Ok, Friday night. Good night Gloria.
- See you later, boys.
362
00:28:06,799 --> 00:28:10,010
- They're gonna shit. Definitely.
- Definitely.
363
00:28:10,011 --> 00:28:12,221
Oh, definitely.
364
00:28:26,068 --> 00:28:28,487
- What do you want?
- Ls Gloria in?
365
00:28:29,405 --> 00:28:31,948
- Who wants her?
- We wanna talk some business.
366
00:28:31,949 --> 00:28:36,286
- She ain't interested.
- We brought along a few friends of ours.
367
00:28:37,121 --> 00:28:39,331
Oh, well...
368
00:28:39,832 --> 00:28:42,543
Any friend of yours is a friend of ours.
369
00:28:46,839 --> 00:28:50,884
That is great. Great. Nice, nice.
370
00:28:50,885 --> 00:28:53,095
Very good. Next!
371
00:29:00,937 --> 00:29:04,857
Lovely! Oh, just wonderful.
372
00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:08,610
Next!
373
00:29:09,320 --> 00:29:12,656
All right, who's supposed to be next?
Let's move it.
374
00:29:14,325 --> 00:29:17,995
Come on, folks. Let's get with it, please.
375
00:29:20,915 --> 00:29:23,208
All right, who's supposed to be next?
376
00:29:23,626 --> 00:29:27,796
- It's pee wee.
- Oh. I see.
377
00:29:27,797 --> 00:29:28,839
Pee wee!
378
00:29:30,299 --> 00:29:34,799
- I'm not comin' out.
- Pee wee, get out here right now.
379
00:29:35,221 --> 00:29:38,348
All we need is a brief look at the costume.
380
00:29:38,349 --> 00:29:40,142
No way.
381
00:29:40,226 --> 00:29:42,937
Pee wee, you get out
here right now or you're
382
00:29:42,979 --> 00:29:45,605
sitting out the rest of
the baseball season.
383
00:29:45,606 --> 00:29:48,650
- Aww mom, I can't. Everybody'll laugh.
- Nobody will laugh.
384
00:29:48,651 --> 00:29:51,361
- Yes, they will.
- No, they won't.
385
00:29:51,362 --> 00:29:55,324
- Will anybody laugh?
- No.
386
00:30:01,080 --> 00:30:03,499
Get the curtain.
387
00:30:11,382 --> 00:30:13,884
It looks great, pee wee.
388
00:30:14,510 --> 00:30:17,429
- Nice horn, buddy.
- Love your dress, meat.
389
00:30:18,764 --> 00:30:20,056
Nice tail.
390
00:30:20,391 --> 00:30:24,853
Excellent, costumers.
Very good. Very creative.
391
00:30:25,354 --> 00:30:29,524
- All right, let's get on with it.
- You're not gettin' on with anything.
392
00:30:29,525 --> 00:30:34,025
- I beg your pardon?
- Rise, flock, and follow.
393
00:30:34,113 --> 00:30:37,866
Excuse me. This is a closed rehearsal.
We don't open for...
394
00:30:37,867 --> 00:30:40,994
This show is never gonna open.
395
00:30:40,995 --> 00:30:43,705
Miss balbricker.
To what do I owe this pleasure?
396
00:30:43,706 --> 00:30:46,375
Oh, it's no pleasure,
i assure you, Morris.
397
00:30:46,417 --> 00:30:49,127
I'm here to lend support
to reverend flavel.
398
00:30:49,128 --> 00:30:53,628
And I'm the spiritual leader of the
righteous flock, reverend bubba flavel.
399
00:30:54,467 --> 00:30:57,385
Bubble flavour?
400
00:30:57,386 --> 00:31:01,556
Bubba flavel, Mrs. Morris.
Reverend bubba flavel.
401
00:31:02,600 --> 00:31:06,644
- It is Mrs. Morris, is it not?
- The last time I looked.
402
00:31:06,645 --> 00:31:11,145
Would you put cow puckeys in
these children's mouths, Mrs. Morris?
403
00:31:12,151 --> 00:31:14,361
What?
404
00:31:14,445 --> 00:31:17,281
Or dog oogies?
405
00:31:18,949 --> 00:31:21,660
Or pelican snot?
406
00:31:22,286 --> 00:31:25,414
Excuse me, I am going to be ill.
407
00:31:25,623 --> 00:31:28,667
This is Shakespeare. It is not filth.
408
00:31:28,751 --> 00:31:33,251
Oh, yes. I know, that's the official position
of the academic community. However...
409
00:31:35,424 --> 00:31:38,677
Exactly what are you trying
to tell us, reverend flavel?
410
00:31:38,761 --> 00:31:43,261
We're closing you down, Morris.
Closing you down.
411
00:31:44,433 --> 00:31:47,102
- On whose authority?
- God's.
412
00:31:47,103 --> 00:31:50,855
- The righteous flock's.
- So sayeth the Shepherd.
413
00:31:50,856 --> 00:31:53,066
So sayeth the flock.
414
00:31:53,776 --> 00:31:57,028
If that's not good enough, we'll take
it to the the principal's office.
415
00:31:57,029 --> 00:31:59,489
Then let's do that, miss balbricker.
416
00:32:00,032 --> 00:32:03,368
Let's just do that. Right now.
417
00:32:07,331 --> 00:32:09,749
Mr. Carter, there's a mob here to see you.
418
00:32:09,750 --> 00:32:14,250
- Do they have an appointment, Betty?
- God always has an appointment!
419
00:32:25,516 --> 00:32:27,726
Come on, Mr. Carter.
420
00:32:32,231 --> 00:32:35,483
Well, reverend. What is the problem now?
421
00:32:35,484 --> 00:32:38,611
What is the problem?
422
00:32:38,612 --> 00:32:41,197
The problem is fornication.
423
00:32:41,198 --> 00:32:44,159
- So sayeth the Shepherd.
- So sayeth the flock.
424
00:32:44,201 --> 00:32:48,413
Sister balbricker. Open your book.
You play the woman's part.
425
00:32:49,582 --> 00:32:53,543
Shakespeare is trash!
I'll give proof. Listen to this!
426
00:32:53,544 --> 00:32:57,088
"If I be waspish, best beware of my sting!"
427
00:32:57,089 --> 00:33:00,842
"Who knows not
where a wasp does wear his sting?"
428
00:33:00,843 --> 00:33:03,761
Get this: "Ln his tail."
429
00:33:03,762 --> 00:33:07,223
- "Ln his tongue."
- "Whose tongue?"
430
00:33:07,224 --> 00:33:11,686
"Yours, if you talk of
tails: And so, farewell."
431
00:33:11,854 --> 00:33:15,732
"What? With my tongue in your tail?"
432
00:33:15,733 --> 00:33:18,651
Now, there's no mistaking
his intention. No, sir.
433
00:33:18,652 --> 00:33:22,906
He intends to put his tongue
in a woman's tail.
434
00:33:22,907 --> 00:33:26,035
What kind of man would
do a thing like that?
435
00:33:27,953 --> 00:33:31,289
Reverend, here is the Bible.
Now... now, listen.
436
00:33:31,373 --> 00:33:33,583
Just a moment. Listen.
437
00:33:33,667 --> 00:33:38,167
"And my beloved put in his hand
by the hole of the door
438
00:33:38,672 --> 00:33:41,591
and my bowels were moved for him."
439
00:33:41,592 --> 00:33:43,552
Song of Solomon. Chapter 5.
440
00:33:43,594 --> 00:33:45,971
The devil can cite
scripture for his purpose.
441
00:33:46,013 --> 00:33:48,598
He can cite Shakespeare
too, reverend flavel.
442
00:33:48,599 --> 00:33:52,727
I have read Solomon and job and Isaiah
443
00:33:52,728 --> 00:33:57,228
and Jeremiah and Malachi
and Matthew and mark and Luke and John.
444
00:33:57,441 --> 00:34:00,360
- And nowhere...
- He forgot sneezy and doc.
445
00:34:00,361 --> 00:34:02,946
Nowhere do I find the likes of this.
446
00:34:03,572 --> 00:34:07,117
Midsummer night's dream. Act v. Scene I.
447
00:34:07,159 --> 00:34:11,246
"The iron tongue of midnight
hath told twelve;
448
00:34:11,330 --> 00:34:15,830
lovers, to bed; 'Tis almost fairy time."
449
00:34:18,087 --> 00:34:21,214
Good god! It's enough
to make a real man sick.
450
00:34:21,215 --> 00:34:23,716
- So sayeth the Shepherd.
- So sayeth the flock.
451
00:34:23,717 --> 00:34:26,636
"And Abraham was 9o years old and nine
452
00:34:26,637 --> 00:34:31,137
"when he was circumcised in the flesh
of his foreskin." Genesis 17.
453
00:34:37,064 --> 00:34:40,025
A midsummer night's dream. Act iv, scene I.
454
00:34:40,067 --> 00:34:42,527
"L could munch your good dry oats."
455
00:34:42,528 --> 00:34:45,905
- So sayeth the Shepherd.
- So sayeth the flock.
456
00:34:45,906 --> 00:34:50,406
"And thy navel is like a rounded
goblet which wanteth not liquor."
457
00:34:50,619 --> 00:34:52,704
Solomon 7, verse 2.
458
00:34:54,707 --> 00:34:57,834
And king lear. Act iv. Scene vi.
459
00:34:57,835 --> 00:35:00,462
"Let copulation thrive!"
460
00:35:00,629 --> 00:35:04,716
- So sayeth the Shepherd.
- So sayeth the flock.
461
00:35:04,717 --> 00:35:07,635
"And when the lord saw Leah was hated,
462
00:35:07,636 --> 00:35:09,804
he opened up her womb."
463
00:35:09,805 --> 00:35:12,057
Genesis 24:31.
464
00:35:16,061 --> 00:35:19,272
Vile! Blasphemous!
465
00:35:19,273 --> 00:35:23,234
Intolerable! Shakespeare must go!
466
00:35:23,235 --> 00:35:27,735
- So sayeth the Shepherd.
- So sayeth the flock.
467
00:35:28,782 --> 00:35:30,992
God damn you, you...
468
00:35:34,830 --> 00:35:37,123
What sayeth you, Mr. Carter?
469
00:35:39,627 --> 00:35:42,254
Get the flock outta here!
470
00:35:51,722 --> 00:35:54,099
All right, Mr.. Carter!
471
00:36:02,232 --> 00:36:04,442
This means war.
472
00:36:04,443 --> 00:36:06,445
Holy war!
473
00:36:07,571 --> 00:36:09,864
Flock, follow!
474
00:36:16,955 --> 00:36:18,122
Thank you.
475
00:36:24,797 --> 00:36:27,382
- Will you hurry up?
- Brian, who do I look like?
476
00:36:27,383 --> 00:36:30,093
One last time: Boris karloff as the mummy.
477
00:36:30,094 --> 00:36:34,473
- Dead right. Dead ringer, huh?
- One more dead joke, you're dead.
478
00:36:35,849 --> 00:36:38,893
Excuse me, girls.
Y'all know a good dermatologist?
479
00:36:41,563 --> 00:36:43,356
All right let's go
over it one more time.
480
00:36:43,357 --> 00:36:45,692
We pick 'em up. You introduce me.
Blah, blah, blah.
481
00:36:45,693 --> 00:36:48,986
"Miss Gloria tight ass,
little miss prim and proper."
482
00:36:48,987 --> 00:36:51,155
"Good evening, boys.
It's swell to meet you."
483
00:36:51,198 --> 00:36:53,908
I figure she whispers a lot,
being from a library and all.
484
00:36:53,909 --> 00:36:57,495
Right. Good, but talk about books or
something. You know, keep 'em off guard.
485
00:36:57,621 --> 00:36:59,497
Oh, yeah. Books.
486
00:36:59,498 --> 00:37:01,833
All right then we take the detour.
You ask me why.
487
00:37:01,834 --> 00:37:03,877
The minute you hear
the word "graveyard"...
488
00:37:03,919 --> 00:37:04,586
I get hot.
489
00:37:04,628 --> 00:37:08,506
But I mean really hot. Be convincing, because
these guy's will be lookin' for a trap.
490
00:37:08,507 --> 00:37:11,426
I mean you even gotta convince me.
And I've been around.
491
00:37:11,468 --> 00:37:13,177
Lover, I will be convincing.
492
00:37:13,178 --> 00:37:17,678
Oh, I want these guys so horny,
they'll do anything for it. Anything.
493
00:37:34,116 --> 00:37:36,952
I don't believe you, what
is the matter with you?
494
00:37:36,994 --> 00:37:39,162
It's the booze, man.
It's deadly.
495
00:37:41,623 --> 00:37:44,542
Wait a minute. I almost forgot my bottle.
496
00:37:44,543 --> 00:37:46,753
That would be a grave error.
497
00:37:49,131 --> 00:37:52,592
So, Gloria,
have you read any good books lately?
498
00:37:52,593 --> 00:37:54,927
I read my gun is quick.
Do you know that one?
499
00:37:54,928 --> 00:37:56,220
Know it? He lives it.
500
00:37:56,221 --> 00:37:59,807
- Really? Are you a private eye?
- No, he's a private dick.
501
00:37:59,850 --> 00:38:03,144
- But not by choice.
- Turner, how about gobblin' my joint?
502
00:38:03,145 --> 00:38:04,646
No, I never read that one, meat.
503
00:38:04,688 --> 00:38:07,523
Me neither. I don't think we
have it in the library yet.
504
00:38:07,524 --> 00:38:09,984
So Gloria, how come we've never
seen you at the library?
505
00:38:09,985 --> 00:38:13,321
- She works odd hours.
- Midnight till three.
506
00:38:13,322 --> 00:38:15,657
Ooh that reminds me. I
promised mother I'd stop by
507
00:38:15,699 --> 00:38:17,909
the cemetery to put flowers
on granddad's grave.
508
00:38:17,910 --> 00:38:19,661
The graveyard?
509
00:38:19,703 --> 00:38:21,913
Ooh, pee wee!
510
00:38:22,831 --> 00:38:23,915
Oh pee wee! Oh!
511
00:38:25,751 --> 00:38:27,335
The worms crawl in.
512
00:38:27,419 --> 00:38:29,170
The worms crawl out.
513
00:38:29,171 --> 00:38:33,671
The worms play pinochle on your snout.
514
00:38:41,266 --> 00:38:44,185
Hey, don't forget your flowers.
515
00:38:44,228 --> 00:38:46,479
- Ok, where are the rednecks?
- Those boys are over there.
516
00:38:46,480 --> 00:38:48,231
Where's Steve?
517
00:38:48,232 --> 00:38:52,193
I think we oughta nail him
in his coffin and leave him overnight.
518
00:38:52,194 --> 00:38:55,488
Hey, listen. Listen to me.
I'm gonna go back to her and...
519
00:38:55,489 --> 00:38:58,366
- She's hot, man. She is really hot.
- That's what you said, pee wee.
520
00:38:58,367 --> 00:39:01,410
- Yeah but she's really hot Timmy!
- Pee wee, I'm getting hot.
521
00:39:01,411 --> 00:39:05,289
I want all you guys - but especially you.
522
00:39:06,208 --> 00:39:08,418
Go get her, pee wee.
523
00:39:10,045 --> 00:39:12,672
I'm getting hot and I really mean it.
524
00:39:12,673 --> 00:39:16,134
Let's you and I go do it
before the others get there huh?
525
00:39:17,970 --> 00:39:20,180
Oh, shit!
526
00:39:20,681 --> 00:39:24,309
- Bye, pee wee.
- Like shootin' fish in a barrel.
527
00:39:24,351 --> 00:39:26,936
Don't die till he gets
all his clothes off.
528
00:39:26,937 --> 00:39:27,938
Right.
529
00:39:29,940 --> 00:39:32,651
- He's going to shit.
- So am I.
530
00:39:33,068 --> 00:39:34,736
Steve!
531
00:39:36,113 --> 00:39:37,655
Shut up, man.
532
00:39:37,656 --> 00:39:42,156
Listen, come on! The signal's been delayed.
Somethin' important came up.
533
00:39:42,786 --> 00:39:45,913
- Be realistic when you die.
- Don't worry, sugar.
534
00:39:45,914 --> 00:39:47,582
- Go easy, bill.
- Right.
535
00:39:49,334 --> 00:39:51,336
Ok. I'm ready.
536
00:39:52,921 --> 00:39:54,797
Well...
537
00:39:54,798 --> 00:39:58,634
I'm dying for it. But wait.
538
00:39:58,635 --> 00:40:02,096
I want you to come... slowly.
539
00:40:04,725 --> 00:40:09,061
Step by step... by step.
540
00:40:09,062 --> 00:40:11,564
I wanna feel your arms around me.
541
00:40:13,942 --> 00:40:18,442
Your lips on mine. Your hands on my body.
542
00:40:20,115 --> 00:40:21,574
Oh, yes.
543
00:40:22,075 --> 00:40:24,994
Touching, searching, feeling.
544
00:40:25,120 --> 00:40:27,330
Oh, pee wee!
545
00:40:30,876 --> 00:40:33,169
My god.
546
00:40:34,087 --> 00:40:36,589
What's the matter? Don't you like me?
547
00:40:43,388 --> 00:40:45,348
What?
548
00:40:47,142 --> 00:40:48,143
What?
549
00:40:50,687 --> 00:40:51,688
What?
550
00:40:55,233 --> 00:40:58,903
I thought she was supposed
to be doing this realistic.
551
00:41:03,784 --> 00:41:06,286
Holy shit!
552
00:41:08,205 --> 00:41:10,207
Help, Tommy!
553
00:41:10,290 --> 00:41:12,416
Help, Tommy, come here! Hurry!
554
00:41:12,417 --> 00:41:14,877
We've got to act serious.
555
00:41:16,004 --> 00:41:17,046
Tommy!
556
00:41:17,422 --> 00:41:19,757
- What happened?
- I don't know.
557
00:41:19,758 --> 00:41:22,259
- Check her pulse.
- What pulse?
558
00:41:22,260 --> 00:41:25,596
- What do you mean, what pulse?
- Ls there a heartbeat?
559
00:41:25,639 --> 00:41:26,556
I don't think so.
560
00:41:26,598 --> 00:41:29,392
Of course there is a heartbeat!
Otherwise she'd be...
561
00:41:29,393 --> 00:41:31,144
Dead.
562
00:41:31,353 --> 00:41:32,354
Ha! Pee wee.
563
00:41:33,105 --> 00:41:36,566
Don't look, pee wee. Just don't look!
564
00:41:37,567 --> 00:41:39,860
She can't be dead. Let me look.
565
00:41:46,994 --> 00:41:50,330
- Dead as a fuckin' doornail.
- Oh, shit!
566
00:41:50,414 --> 00:41:52,624
You got her too excited, pee wee.
567
00:41:52,708 --> 00:41:56,795
- I think we should call the police.
- Police?! My mom's gonna kill me.
568
00:41:58,130 --> 00:42:00,006
- Oh we can't do that.
- Why not?
569
00:42:00,007 --> 00:42:02,300
- Pee we'll go to jail.
- Jail?
570
00:42:03,260 --> 00:42:04,552
What do you mean?
571
00:42:04,553 --> 00:42:08,348
Look man, this is coitus interruptus.
In extremis.
572
00:42:08,390 --> 00:42:11,809
- Yeah, that's a good point.
- But I didn't do anything, Tommy!
573
00:42:11,810 --> 00:42:13,728
The law doesn't look at
it that way pee wee.
574
00:42:13,770 --> 00:42:18,270
If a woman dies while you're boffing her,
you're considered an accomplice.
575
00:42:18,358 --> 00:42:21,277
- Oh, shit, pee wee.
- Oh, my god.
576
00:42:21,278 --> 00:42:24,197
Look, pee wee. It really wasn't your fault.
577
00:42:24,698 --> 00:42:26,658
She probably had a bad heart.
578
00:42:26,700 --> 00:42:29,202
Yeah, it could have
happened to any of us.
579
00:42:29,244 --> 00:42:31,120
Yeah, especially you, meat.
580
00:42:32,664 --> 00:42:37,164
- So. What are we gonna do?
- William, there's only one thing to do.
581
00:42:37,669 --> 00:42:39,879
What's that, Thomas?
582
00:42:42,340 --> 00:42:44,508
Bury her.
583
00:42:44,760 --> 00:42:47,344
Yeah. We've gotta protect pee wee.
584
00:42:47,345 --> 00:42:49,847
Hold up, they might miss
her down at the library.
585
00:42:52,476 --> 00:42:55,728
Well I just suppose that's a chance
we're gonna have to take.
586
00:42:55,729 --> 00:42:59,023
- Absolutely right.
- Meat, you wanna grab that body?
587
00:43:02,027 --> 00:43:04,946
- Watch your hands buster.
- What do you care? You're dead.
588
00:43:05,906 --> 00:43:09,576
- She's gettin' stiff already.
- So are you, meat.
589
00:43:36,436 --> 00:43:38,729
- What is this?
- Nothin'.
590
00:43:39,689 --> 00:43:42,108
- What do you mean "nothin" '?
- Who's in there? Where? There!
591
00:43:42,109 --> 00:43:44,069
- Nobody.
- "Nobody"?
592
00:43:50,826 --> 00:43:52,494
It's Steve.
Steve?
593
00:43:52,619 --> 00:43:55,121
- It was a joke. It was just a joke.
- A joke?
594
00:43:55,122 --> 00:43:57,791
Good god, pee wee, there's
a woman lying dead
595
00:43:57,833 --> 00:44:00,668
over there. And you're
telling us it was a joke?
596
00:44:00,669 --> 00:44:02,003
I didn't know!
597
00:44:02,129 --> 00:44:05,673
We've put up with your pranks
for many years now.
598
00:44:05,674 --> 00:44:09,760
But we never dreamed that you'd
have such little regard for human life.
599
00:44:09,761 --> 00:44:12,597
We're disappointed.
Bitterly disappointed.
600
00:44:12,639 --> 00:44:14,849
Well, god help you, pee wee.
601
00:44:16,101 --> 00:44:18,978
- You're gonna have to live with this!
- Yeah. Amen.
602
00:44:20,438 --> 00:44:22,648
But...
603
00:44:25,902 --> 00:44:27,862
Oh, shit, Steve.
604
00:44:28,905 --> 00:44:29,906
Hey!
605
00:44:30,157 --> 00:44:32,868
Goddammit, I'm talkin' to you!
606
00:44:34,119 --> 00:44:36,954
What the fuck do you think you're doin'?
607
00:44:36,955 --> 00:44:41,455
- It's the goddamn grave robbers again.
- I'm gonna blow their fuckin' heads off.
608
00:44:44,129 --> 00:44:46,548
Come on, you guys. What's goin' on?
609
00:44:46,840 --> 00:44:49,258
Holy shit!
610
00:44:49,259 --> 00:44:52,053
Bye-bye, pee wee. See you later!
611
00:44:52,596 --> 00:44:54,763
What are you guys doin'?
612
00:44:54,764 --> 00:44:56,640
Shit!
613
00:44:58,310 --> 00:45:01,771
- Bye, pee wee!
- See you around!
614
00:45:09,070 --> 00:45:12,823
- Crazy little fuckers.
- Well, it's an easy ten bucks.
615
00:45:12,824 --> 00:45:14,992
That's right. Hand it over.
616
00:45:21,666 --> 00:45:23,876
- Just kids.
- Yeah.
617
00:45:25,629 --> 00:45:28,339
Remember the last time
we were on this road?
618
00:45:28,340 --> 00:45:30,425
Yeah. Couldn't forget that.
619
00:45:46,691 --> 00:45:48,901
I really wanna hear this story.
620
00:45:51,613 --> 00:45:53,281
Look out!
621
00:45:58,870 --> 00:46:00,413
Boogie, boogie, boogie!
622
00:46:02,499 --> 00:46:04,042
Boogie, boogie. Boogie!
623
00:46:04,709 --> 00:46:06,252
Boogie, boogie, boogie!
624
00:46:08,713 --> 00:46:09,714
Boogie, boogie!
625
00:46:10,090 --> 00:46:11,633
Boogie, boogie, boogie!
626
00:46:13,176 --> 00:46:14,718
Boogie, boogie, boogie!
627
00:46:14,719 --> 00:46:15,720
Boogie!
628
00:46:35,782 --> 00:46:37,992
All right. That's it.
629
00:46:51,464 --> 00:46:53,466
Ok, ok. All right.
630
00:46:53,550 --> 00:46:55,760
All right, take it up.
631
00:46:58,763 --> 00:47:01,265
This is gonna scare the shit out of 'em.
632
00:47:07,689 --> 00:47:09,774
They gonna mess their trousers!
633
00:47:12,193 --> 00:47:15,404
- Why are we doin' this for?
- I don't know, Billy.
634
00:47:15,405 --> 00:47:18,240
- Brian, get the house lights, please.
- Sure.
635
00:47:18,241 --> 00:47:22,453
Just pretend reverend flavel and
the county commissioners aren't out there.
636
00:47:22,454 --> 00:47:25,331
We'll do the scenes as
we've rehearsed them.
637
00:47:25,332 --> 00:47:28,251
Now, don't worry about it. It's going to...
638
00:47:40,388 --> 00:47:43,724
- What is it?
- These clowns.
639
00:47:44,351 --> 00:47:47,227
What's this supposed to mean?
640
00:47:47,228 --> 00:47:48,479
Well...
641
00:47:48,480 --> 00:47:52,442
They don't like John Henry
playing Romeo to Wendy's Juliet.
642
00:47:54,110 --> 00:47:56,112
I'll withdraw if
you think it's best.
643
00:47:56,154 --> 00:47:58,614
Oh, no. We're not
givin' in to this stuff.
644
00:47:58,615 --> 00:48:00,575
Now hold on a second.
645
00:48:00,784 --> 00:48:05,284
John Henry, certainly we're not going
to be intimidated by this stupidity.
646
00:48:06,122 --> 00:48:09,667
But, ultimately, the decision
isn't ours. It's yours.
647
00:48:21,763 --> 00:48:23,973
Mrs. Morris!
648
00:48:25,725 --> 00:48:30,062
Oh, Mrs. Morris. I'd like you to meet
his honor mayor John g. Abernathy.
649
00:48:30,063 --> 00:48:33,441
- How do you do?
- How are you? Great school. Great.
650
00:48:33,483 --> 00:48:36,610
- Great school. My mother was a teacher.
- Really?
651
00:48:36,611 --> 00:48:41,111
Have you met the other commissioners?
Commissioner couch. Commissioner Hurley.
652
00:48:41,366 --> 00:48:43,284
- Bob gebhardt.
- Pleased to meet you.
653
00:48:43,326 --> 00:48:46,995
- Well, gentlemen, I hope you enjoy it.
- Not likely.
654
00:48:46,996 --> 00:48:49,206
I always admired the bard myself.
655
00:48:49,207 --> 00:48:53,628
I know several thousand voters
who don't share your view, commissioner.
656
00:48:53,670 --> 00:48:56,297
That sounds like a
threat, reverend flavel.
657
00:48:56,339 --> 00:48:59,383
The lord doesn't have
to threaten Mr. flavel.
658
00:48:59,384 --> 00:49:01,468
You remember that, reverend commissioner.
659
00:49:01,469 --> 00:49:05,347
- Well, shall we start?
- Of course, sir.
660
00:49:07,559 --> 00:49:11,187
Call me but love, and I'll be new baptized;
661
00:49:11,479 --> 00:49:14,273
henceforth I never will be Romeo.
662
00:49:14,274 --> 00:49:16,275
What man art thou, that,
thus be screened in night,
663
00:49:16,276 --> 00:49:19,195
so stumblest on my counsel?
664
00:49:19,612 --> 00:49:23,699
By a name I know not
how to tell thee who I am:
665
00:49:24,075 --> 00:49:28,575
My name, dear Saint, is hateful to myself,
because it is an enemy to thee.
666
00:49:30,373 --> 00:49:32,666
My ears have not yet drunk...
667
00:49:32,667 --> 00:49:36,086
- That kid's a seminole.
- Yeah, probably.
668
00:49:36,087 --> 00:49:39,423
Are thou not Romeo, and a montague?
669
00:49:39,424 --> 00:49:42,885
Gentle Romeo, if thou dost
love, pronounce it faithfully.
670
00:49:42,886 --> 00:49:47,386
Or if thou think'st I be too quickly won,
I'll frown and be perverse and say thee nay.
671
00:49:47,932 --> 00:49:51,727
- Lady, by yonder blessed moon...
- O swear not by the moon...
672
00:49:53,688 --> 00:49:57,191
That young man is not
of the American persuasion.
673
00:49:57,192 --> 00:49:59,526
My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
674
00:49:59,527 --> 00:50:02,237
my love as deep; The more I give to thee,
675
00:50:02,238 --> 00:50:05,073
the more I have...
676
00:50:05,074 --> 00:50:07,785
Yet I should kill thee
with much cherishing.
677
00:50:08,119 --> 00:50:10,621
Good night, good night!
Parting is such sweet sorrow.
678
00:50:10,622 --> 00:50:13,458
That I shall say good
night till it be morrow.
679
00:50:25,929 --> 00:50:28,514
- Well?
- Didn't we tell you?
680
00:50:28,556 --> 00:50:33,056
I want the school board to cut off funds
for this extravaganza immediately.
681
00:50:34,562 --> 00:50:37,189
Well reverend, we're not
the school board. The
682
00:50:37,232 --> 00:50:39,817
school board is an
independently elected body.
683
00:50:39,859 --> 00:50:42,319
We'll discuss it however.
I'll get back to you.
684
00:50:42,362 --> 00:50:43,570
This is ridiculous!
685
00:50:43,571 --> 00:50:48,071
Hell's a lot hotter than angel beach,
Mr. Carter. You'll get quite a tan.
686
00:50:50,328 --> 00:50:52,621
I wouldn't worry too much about it.
687
00:50:57,961 --> 00:50:58,836
Who's that guy?
688
00:50:58,878 --> 00:51:01,463
It's commissioner gebhardt.
He's a friend of dad's.
689
00:51:01,464 --> 00:51:02,298
So what do you think?
690
00:51:02,340 --> 00:51:04,383
He's great guy. We got
nothin' to worry about.
691
00:51:04,592 --> 00:51:05,593
Let's hope so.
692
00:51:05,635 --> 00:51:08,387
- You know who's behind this don't you?
- Yeah. Balbricker.
693
00:51:08,388 --> 00:51:10,765
Right. Now she gets hers.
694
00:51:12,350 --> 00:51:15,353
Thomas! Hold it, Thomas!
695
00:51:23,987 --> 00:51:25,738
- Billy.
- What's this?
696
00:51:25,780 --> 00:51:26,530
Blueprints.
697
00:51:26,573 --> 00:51:28,866
I know they're blueprints.
What are they of?
698
00:51:29,826 --> 00:51:32,662
- Take a look.
- Ok. There's the school.
699
00:51:33,621 --> 00:51:37,249
Ok. So this is the gym. So what?
700
00:51:37,250 --> 00:51:40,044
- So we take this snake...
- Jesus Christ! What the hell you doin'?!
701
00:51:40,169 --> 00:51:41,336
Get it outta my face!
702
00:51:41,337 --> 00:51:42,421
You don't like snakes?
703
00:51:42,422 --> 00:51:44,965
I hate snakes! You know
i hate snakes. Jesus!
704
00:51:44,966 --> 00:51:46,676
What are you gonna do?
Kill her?
705
00:51:46,718 --> 00:51:49,137
It's just a rat snake.
It's not poisonous.
706
00:52:45,109 --> 00:52:49,609
That old black magic has me in its spell.
707
00:52:51,699 --> 00:52:56,199
That old black magic
that you weave so well.
708
00:52:57,747 --> 00:53:02,042
- Are you sure this is the one, Billy?
- It's that one right there.
709
00:53:03,920 --> 00:53:06,130
- You're sure?
- Yeah.
710
00:53:07,340 --> 00:53:09,133
Here we go.
711
00:53:09,342 --> 00:53:11,761
A flame.
712
00:53:11,844 --> 00:53:14,971
With such a burning desire.
713
00:53:14,972 --> 00:53:18,266
That only your kiss, kiss, kiss.
714
00:53:18,309 --> 00:53:20,978
Can put out the fire.
715
00:53:21,187 --> 00:53:25,687
- Ok, Billy, gimme the snake.
- Give you the snake?
716
00:53:25,983 --> 00:53:28,902
Get your own fuckin' snake.
717
00:53:28,903 --> 00:53:31,613
- I've got your snake right here.
- Here.
718
00:53:31,614 --> 00:53:36,114
Oh, you're the lover I have waited for.
719
00:53:36,327 --> 00:53:40,827
The mate that fate had me created for.
720
00:53:42,709 --> 00:53:47,209
And every time your lips meet mine.
721
00:53:50,299 --> 00:53:52,509
Get it outta here!
722
00:53:52,510 --> 00:53:57,010
- Put him in the goddamn hole!
- I want you to meet a friend of mine.
723
00:54:00,143 --> 00:54:02,186
Ok, come on.
724
00:54:03,020 --> 00:54:05,313
In a spin.
725
00:54:05,314 --> 00:54:08,150
Lovin' that spin I'm in.
726
00:54:08,443 --> 00:54:12,943
Under that old black magic called...
727
00:54:14,157 --> 00:54:18,202
Love.
728
00:54:18,244 --> 00:54:20,120
One more turn and we'll go.
729
00:54:47,023 --> 00:54:49,108
What in the world...?
730
00:55:02,789 --> 00:55:05,249
No, it can't be. I fired them.
731
00:55:23,768 --> 00:55:25,352
Excuse me.
732
00:55:29,982 --> 00:55:32,192
It's ok. Nothing to worry about.
733
00:55:33,528 --> 00:55:35,738
Just a little rat snake.
734
00:55:37,073 --> 00:55:38,657
No danger.
735
00:55:38,825 --> 00:55:41,160
No problem, coach. I'll let him go outside.
736
00:55:41,202 --> 00:55:43,871
Quick thinking, Turner. Good job, son.
737
00:55:45,331 --> 00:55:47,291
Turner!
738
00:55:48,000 --> 00:55:50,043
Turner!
739
00:55:50,294 --> 00:55:52,129
Beautiful.
740
00:55:52,213 --> 00:55:54,423
- Hang on to that.
- Jesus!
741
00:55:55,007 --> 00:55:56,967
Goddammit!
742
00:55:57,009 --> 00:55:59,803
Turner, I'm gonna kill you! Goddammit.
743
00:56:00,763 --> 00:56:04,057
Turner!!
744
00:56:04,433 --> 00:56:07,727
That's it. You're not
gonna surrender to him.
745
00:56:07,728 --> 00:56:10,313
No seminole ever surrendered!
746
00:56:10,314 --> 00:56:12,399
Go on! That's it!
747
00:56:12,525 --> 00:56:13,859
Go. Go!
748
00:56:13,860 --> 00:56:15,945
Oh, wait a minute. Wait!
749
00:56:16,070 --> 00:56:20,448
That's good acting when you wanna
kill each other, but don't, huh?
750
00:56:20,449 --> 00:56:22,951
I think Hamlet's supposed to win this one.
751
00:56:22,952 --> 00:56:25,329
- Sorry, I just got carried away.
- That's ok.
752
00:56:25,371 --> 00:56:27,331
Oh, Mrs. Morris.
753
00:56:27,665 --> 00:56:28,666
Oh Mrs. Morris.
754
00:56:29,542 --> 00:56:32,168
I must have a couple of words
with the students please.
755
00:56:32,169 --> 00:56:34,523
- We're in the middle of a rehearsal.
- It's very important.
756
00:56:34,547 --> 00:56:35,965
All right Mr. Carter.
757
00:56:36,048 --> 00:56:39,217
All right, folks.
Let's get up here, please. Quickly.
758
00:56:39,218 --> 00:56:42,763
Let's move it.
Folks, may we have your attention please.
759
00:56:42,805 --> 00:56:46,558
Mr. Carter has a few words. Come on, now.
760
00:56:46,976 --> 00:56:51,476
Thank you. I don't like to have to say this,
but I don't want you to be too distressed
761
00:56:51,898 --> 00:56:56,360
because I'm quite sure
it can be resolved perfectly justly.
762
00:56:56,402 --> 00:57:00,155
As you know, certain uninformed
factions have attempted
763
00:57:00,156 --> 00:57:03,826
to halt our production
of the scenes from Shakespeare.
764
00:57:03,951 --> 00:57:08,246
They influenced the county commission
to address the school board,
765
00:57:08,247 --> 00:57:10,707
and indeed they have
been granted a hearing.
766
00:57:10,708 --> 00:57:13,585
Therefore the superintendent of schools
has ordered me
767
00:57:13,586 --> 00:57:17,506
to temporarily suspend
this production, pending that hearing.
768
00:57:18,341 --> 00:57:21,259
I understand how you feel.
Now, please listen.
769
00:57:21,260 --> 00:57:23,679
That is what I am doing officially.
770
00:57:24,180 --> 00:57:28,680
However, there's absolutely nothing
to prevent you on your own
771
00:57:28,893 --> 00:57:32,395
continuing to practice as a class project.
772
00:57:32,396 --> 00:57:36,399
Of course I assure you, we're going
to everything we possibly can
773
00:57:36,400 --> 00:57:39,903
to put this "evening with
Shakespeare" on the stage.
774
00:57:39,987 --> 00:57:42,489
Thank you, and what's the phrase?
775
00:57:42,490 --> 00:57:44,450
Break a leg!
776
00:57:44,492 --> 00:57:47,327
- What a mess.
- Those bastards.
777
00:57:47,328 --> 00:57:48,495
Man, this is ridiculous.
778
00:57:48,579 --> 00:57:52,666
The county commissioners are gonna shutdown
Shakespeare because they think it's dirty?
779
00:57:52,667 --> 00:57:56,212
Those creeps watch skin flicks every
Saturday in the basement of the courthouse.
780
00:57:56,253 --> 00:57:57,003
You're kidding!
781
00:57:57,046 --> 00:57:59,297
No I'm not kidding.
Commissioner Mason was caught
782
00:57:59,298 --> 00:58:03,798
exposing himself two years ago to his
Bible school class and they hushed it up.
783
00:58:03,844 --> 00:58:06,930
- Oh, god. How did you know that?
- Everybody knows that. That's right.
784
00:58:06,931 --> 00:58:09,641
- Well, don't worry about it.
- What do you mean?
785
00:58:09,642 --> 00:58:11,894
We got a friend in court, remember?
786
00:58:12,228 --> 00:58:15,272
- Yeah, commissioner...
- Geb-fart.
787
00:58:15,439 --> 00:58:18,692
God, I love this. I just love it.
788
00:58:20,444 --> 00:58:24,739
I can't tell you how great it makes me feel
to see you great American kids
789
00:58:24,740 --> 00:58:26,658
standing up and fighting for
what you think is right.
790
00:58:26,659 --> 00:58:30,787
And believe me there's no question about
what's right here. I think this is ridiculous.
791
00:58:30,788 --> 00:58:34,874
- But how can he do this?
- Well, he hasn't done anything yet.
792
00:58:34,875 --> 00:58:38,461
All he's done is petitioned
the school board for a hearing.
793
00:58:38,462 --> 00:58:39,671
But they stopped the play.
794
00:58:39,714 --> 00:58:42,173
Well now son they haven't
stopped anything yet have they?
795
00:58:42,174 --> 00:58:44,551
- You're still rehearsing.
- Yeah...
796
00:58:44,552 --> 00:58:45,593
Right.
797
00:58:45,594 --> 00:58:48,096
See you don't understand
the politics behind this.
798
00:58:48,139 --> 00:58:51,142
This is the way it's gonna work.
I've got it all mapped out.
799
00:58:51,183 --> 00:58:54,644
As you know, we've got an election
coming up in a couple of weeks.
800
00:58:54,645 --> 00:58:57,022
Flavel's got a few votes under his thumb,
801
00:58:57,064 --> 00:59:00,191
it's not many, but it's enough to scare
a couple of my fellow commissioners.
802
00:59:00,192 --> 00:59:02,569
So, what's the easy thing to do?
803
00:59:02,570 --> 00:59:05,405
We make flavel happy. So...
804
00:59:05,406 --> 00:59:09,325
So the commission makes flavel happy
by taking the issue to the school board.
805
00:59:09,326 --> 00:59:12,829
Right. Now the school board's
not up for reelection,
806
00:59:12,830 --> 00:59:15,957
so they turn the petition
down and you'll be happy.
807
00:59:15,958 --> 00:59:20,253
And the commission is
off the hook because... we tried.
808
00:59:22,923 --> 00:59:25,425
So how'd you get
the commissioners to go along?
809
00:59:25,426 --> 00:59:27,511
Old-fashioned horse trading.
810
00:59:27,636 --> 00:59:30,638
Couple of my fellow
commissioners have a rezoning
811
00:59:30,639 --> 00:59:33,308
project on the line, and
I'm the swing vote.
812
00:59:33,309 --> 00:59:37,809
I really don't give a damn if they get their
rezoning - but I can't let them know that.
813
00:59:38,064 --> 00:59:40,524
So I play hardball.
814
00:59:40,941 --> 00:59:43,735
Now if they want my swing vote,
they have to help me with your problem.
815
00:59:43,736 --> 00:59:45,946
It's like the hip bone
connected to the thigh
816
00:59:45,988 --> 00:59:48,281
bone, thigh bone to the
ankle bone and so on...
817
00:59:48,282 --> 00:59:52,782
- It sounds like dirty pool to me.
- Well...
818
00:59:53,704 --> 00:59:58,204
Well, now, little fella. Our great
American system is built on compromise.
819
00:59:58,209 --> 01:00:02,630
Everybody wants something. The trick is
to see that everybody gets a little piece.
820
01:00:02,755 --> 01:00:05,257
- You know what I mean?
- You bet he does.
821
01:00:07,259 --> 01:00:09,344
Now, you've got my word on this.
822
01:00:10,096 --> 01:00:14,140
I'm not gonna let a pack of self-righteous
bullies deprive you of your play.
823
01:00:14,141 --> 01:00:17,143
Matter of fact, if I'm not mistaken your
principal is being notified right now
824
01:00:17,144 --> 01:00:21,644
that the school board has okayed
the evening of Shakespeare.
825
01:00:22,441 --> 01:00:25,485
That's wonderful. Thank you very much.
826
01:00:25,903 --> 01:00:28,738
Well, you can't do somethin' for the
little guy, you don't belong in office.
827
01:00:28,739 --> 01:00:33,239
Oh, commissioner.
Your meeting in five minutes.
828
01:00:34,370 --> 01:00:38,040
Now you kids go put on a hell of a play.
829
01:00:38,541 --> 01:00:41,252
- Thanks.
- Thank you.
830
01:00:41,544 --> 01:00:44,296
Maybe I'll get invited
to the opening night?
831
01:00:44,338 --> 01:00:45,714
Front row, center.
832
01:00:51,971 --> 01:00:54,056
- Great guy.
- Yeah, he's swell!
833
01:01:00,729 --> 01:01:02,605
What's that?
834
01:01:02,606 --> 01:01:06,526
Reverend flavel's petition
to stop the Shakespeare festival.
835
01:01:06,527 --> 01:01:09,071
- Five thousand signatures.
- Five thousand?
836
01:01:09,155 --> 01:01:12,282
Yeah, five thousand and
every one of them prepared
837
01:01:12,283 --> 01:01:15,327
to vote against you if
things don't go their way.
838
01:01:18,455 --> 01:01:20,665
Set up a meeting with flavel.
839
01:01:21,500 --> 01:01:23,293
Right.
840
01:01:23,377 --> 01:01:25,587
I thought so.
841
01:01:32,845 --> 01:01:35,055
The klan!
842
01:01:42,438 --> 01:01:46,357
- Guys, what's goin' on? What happened?
- There's no need for you now.
843
01:01:46,358 --> 01:01:49,194
- Wait a minute. We're his friends.
- I'm his brother.
844
01:01:49,195 --> 01:01:51,946
If you'd been have been here on
time this wouldn't have happened.
845
01:01:51,947 --> 01:01:53,239
Look we couldn't help it.
My truck wouldn't start.
846
01:01:53,240 --> 01:01:57,660
John's always waited for us to get here before
he came out to the road. We didn't know.
847
01:01:57,661 --> 01:02:01,623
Leave him alone. It was John's mistake.
848
01:02:05,085 --> 01:02:08,004
- How badly is he hurt?
- Just his pride.
849
01:02:08,631 --> 01:02:10,798
They tried to shave his head.
850
01:02:10,799 --> 01:02:14,761
A white man's little joke.
But their day is coming.
851
01:02:17,306 --> 01:02:18,974
Whoa, buddy.
852
01:02:19,058 --> 01:02:21,643
Are you all right? You're sure, John?
853
01:02:23,812 --> 01:02:26,940
- I wanna go.
- Let him go.
854
01:02:27,900 --> 01:02:29,693
All right, go.
855
01:02:30,069 --> 01:02:34,031
- That oughta stir 'em up.
- Yeah, they oughta turn tail now.
856
01:02:36,533 --> 01:02:41,033
Look at them dirty redskins
attacking that poor, defenseless cross.
857
01:02:48,045 --> 01:02:49,295
I will not yield,
858
01:02:49,296 --> 01:02:52,924
to kiss the ground
beneath young Malcolm's feet.
859
01:02:52,925 --> 01:02:55,969
Though birnam wood
be come to dunsinane,
860
01:02:55,970 --> 01:02:58,888
and thou opposed,
being of no woman born,
861
01:02:58,889 --> 01:03:00,974
yet I will try the last.
862
01:03:01,392 --> 01:03:03,602
Lay on, macduff.
863
01:03:07,815 --> 01:03:11,985
And damned be he
that first cries "hold, enough!"
864
01:03:47,980 --> 01:03:50,399
- My sword broke.
- His sword broke!
865
01:03:50,482 --> 01:03:53,276
- A sword!
- A sword!
866
01:03:53,277 --> 01:03:56,112
His kingdom for a sword!
867
01:03:56,113 --> 01:03:59,032
Get him a sword!
868
01:03:59,033 --> 01:04:01,035
A sword!
869
01:04:01,744 --> 01:04:02,870
A sword! A sword!
870
01:04:02,995 --> 01:04:06,122
- I don't have a sword.
- What do you mean you don't have a sword?
871
01:04:06,123 --> 01:04:10,085
- Just kill him.
- With what?
872
01:04:12,713 --> 01:04:13,714
A sword!
873
01:04:14,381 --> 01:04:15,382
A sword!
874
01:04:15,883 --> 01:04:16,884
A sword!
875
01:04:17,801 --> 01:04:18,802
A sword!
876
01:04:20,262 --> 01:04:21,263
A sword!
877
01:04:22,014 --> 01:04:24,808
Billy, I got a sword.
878
01:05:01,178 --> 01:05:03,388
Stab him.
879
01:05:09,186 --> 01:05:11,271
Just kill me, John.
880
01:05:12,856 --> 01:05:14,941
Aw, shit!
881
01:05:17,945 --> 01:05:19,071
Stab!
882
01:05:19,113 --> 01:05:22,032
Will you stab me? Just stick it in, John!
883
01:06:02,281 --> 01:06:06,781
Now the hungry lion roars,
and the wolf behowls the moon;
884
01:06:07,077 --> 01:06:11,577
as this heavy ploughman snores,
all the weary task for done.
885
01:06:13,750 --> 01:06:17,420
Now the wasted brands do glow,
886
01:06:17,421 --> 01:06:20,548
whilst the screech owl, screeching loud,
887
01:06:20,549 --> 01:06:24,094
does put the wretch that lies in woe
to the remembrance of a shroud.
888
01:06:32,311 --> 01:06:34,521
Flock! Follow.
889
01:06:37,816 --> 01:06:41,152
Not a mouse
shall disturb this hallowed house:
890
01:06:41,153 --> 01:06:45,653
For I am sent with broom before,
to sweep the dust behind the door.
891
01:06:59,421 --> 01:07:02,882
If we have unearned luck
so to 'scape the serpent's tongue,
892
01:07:03,091 --> 01:07:07,178
we will make amends ere long;
Or else puck...
893
01:07:17,147 --> 01:07:21,526
- It's the cops!
- Whoa, what's this? What's goin' on here?
894
01:07:24,238 --> 01:07:26,739
I am the principal and i
will take care of this.
895
01:07:26,740 --> 01:07:29,450
Ladies and gentlemen, one moment, please.
896
01:07:29,451 --> 01:07:33,538
These learned people, the righteous flock,
in their infinite wisdom,
897
01:07:33,539 --> 01:07:38,039
have decreed that the works of William
Shakespeare, the Pearl of English literature,
898
01:07:39,795 --> 01:07:44,295
are unfit to be performed by our students
and too indecent to be viewed by you.
899
01:07:46,969 --> 01:07:51,139
However, my good friends, I assure you:
900
01:07:51,181 --> 01:07:53,474
We have not yet begun to fight.
901
01:07:55,394 --> 01:07:57,479
Thank you.
902
01:08:00,732 --> 01:08:02,900
Good night,
903
01:08:02,901 --> 01:08:06,362
and we'll see you all again... very soon.
904
01:08:12,619 --> 01:08:16,039
- Who do you think you're talkin' to?
- A hypocrite.
905
01:08:16,081 --> 01:08:18,583
You care nothing about
matters of the spirit.
906
01:08:18,584 --> 01:08:21,794
You just wanna control
other people's lives, you fascist!
907
01:08:21,795 --> 01:08:24,422
We have dealt with the filth.
I can see we will
908
01:08:24,423 --> 01:08:26,924
now have to deal with
the purveyors of filth.
909
01:08:26,925 --> 01:08:30,678
- Hey, deal with this.
- You whelp of Satan!
910
01:08:30,679 --> 01:08:34,849
No one speaks to me that way.
You better get a grip on yourself, boy.
911
01:08:42,941 --> 01:08:45,234
Bye, reverend.
912
01:08:45,235 --> 01:08:48,488
Anthony, that wasn't entirely helpful.
913
01:08:51,533 --> 01:08:54,327
Now, as I say, we have a warrant here
914
01:08:54,328 --> 01:08:57,371
charging the angel beach high drama club
915
01:08:57,372 --> 01:09:01,542
with public presentation
of obscene material.
916
01:09:02,044 --> 01:09:06,544
Of course, we have no need to press
this warrant. That was never our intent.
917
01:09:07,007 --> 01:09:09,675
These innocent children aren't to blame.
918
01:09:09,676 --> 01:09:13,095
- Do you believe this guy?
- He's a deeply religious man!
919
01:09:13,096 --> 01:09:15,348
Yeah, and rich.
920
01:09:15,432 --> 01:09:19,226
We were the voice cryin' in the wilderness.
921
01:09:19,227 --> 01:09:22,355
And we were heard by the mayor
922
01:09:22,356 --> 01:09:26,856
and the god-fearin' members of the county
commission, who voted unanimously
923
01:09:27,569 --> 01:09:30,154
to bring this corruption to a halt.
924
01:09:30,197 --> 01:09:33,741
Does your warrant
apply to all plays by the drama club?
925
01:09:33,742 --> 01:09:37,286
My warrant applies
to all plays by any drama club...
926
01:09:37,287 --> 01:09:39,247
That lousy son of a bitch.
927
01:09:39,373 --> 01:09:42,667
Gebhardt's leg bone got connected
to flavel's foot bone.
928
01:09:42,668 --> 01:09:45,961
And they both got shoved up our asses.
I knew it.
929
01:09:45,962 --> 01:09:48,547
Fellow Americans! Fellow Americans...
930
01:09:48,548 --> 01:09:51,926
The righteous flock denounces you.
You have no part in this.
931
01:09:51,968 --> 01:09:55,680
The god-fearin' members
of the klan support this action.
932
01:09:56,807 --> 01:10:00,434
The mixin' of nigger
and lnjun blood must stop.
933
01:10:00,435 --> 01:10:03,271
- God, I think I'm gonna puke.
- Me too.
934
01:10:03,772 --> 01:10:05,940
Go on, get out of here!
935
01:10:05,941 --> 01:10:10,441
- The righteous flock denounces this...
- Sister, please!
936
01:10:11,071 --> 01:10:14,240
Friends, I'd like to tell
you that tomorrow night
937
01:10:14,241 --> 01:10:17,243
there will be a giant
rally right here at angel beach
938
01:10:17,244 --> 01:10:21,744
to announce future steps
we will take to preserve moral decency.
939
01:10:22,958 --> 01:10:25,668
Amen! Amen, brother!
940
01:10:25,669 --> 01:10:28,588
The loyal order of the klan will be there!
941
01:10:29,339 --> 01:10:30,798
Here comes the son of a bitch.
942
01:10:30,841 --> 01:10:33,759
Be nice to him. Pretend you
understand why he did it.
943
01:10:33,760 --> 01:10:37,054
- What are you talkin' about?
- Just do it! I'll explain later.
944
01:10:37,055 --> 01:10:38,139
This is exhausting!
945
01:10:38,181 --> 01:10:41,475
All tuckered out from
playin' hardball commissioner?
946
01:10:43,270 --> 01:10:45,355
I was afraid you were
gonna misunderstand.
947
01:10:45,397 --> 01:10:47,565
Look, look, I had to
make a tactical retreat.
948
01:10:47,566 --> 01:10:50,610
If I'd hung in there, gotten steamrollered.
You'd have no friend in court.
949
01:10:50,902 --> 01:10:53,946
Friend in court? Gee,
that has a familiar ring.
950
01:10:54,114 --> 01:10:56,323
I said "retreat," not "surrender."
951
01:10:56,324 --> 01:10:59,785
You heard this guy. He's a fanatic. Give
him two weeks, he's gonna bury himself.
952
01:10:59,786 --> 01:11:02,371
- Right after the election, hm?
- Yeah.
953
01:11:02,414 --> 01:11:06,376
Apparently you're not prepared to believe me,
but I was working in your best interests.
954
01:11:06,418 --> 01:11:10,796
Look, votes don't mean a thing to me
if I can't maintain my own integrity.
955
01:11:10,797 --> 01:11:13,632
Look, commissioner we understand.
It's not the end of the world.
956
01:11:13,633 --> 01:11:16,343
Everybody's just a little
disappointed, right?
957
01:11:16,344 --> 01:11:18,554
I know. I understand.
958
01:11:18,555 --> 01:11:23,055
Wendy, let me talk to you. I want to explain
what it is I'm trying to accomplish,
959
01:11:23,059 --> 01:11:26,687
- then you can relay it to the fellas. Ok?
- Ok.
960
01:11:27,898 --> 01:11:30,191
I know what he's trying to accomplish.
961
01:11:30,192 --> 01:11:34,069
Mrs. balbricker, be silent!
I have spoken on this matter.
962
01:11:34,070 --> 01:11:36,989
What is at stake justifies
anything we have to do.
963
01:11:36,990 --> 01:11:41,077
Well, then, I won't be there.
It's indecent.
964
01:11:41,578 --> 01:11:45,247
Remember, he who is not
with me is against me.
965
01:11:45,248 --> 01:11:47,458
Bubba!
966
01:11:49,211 --> 01:11:51,421
Tell us, reverend.
967
01:11:52,130 --> 01:11:56,259
Friends, it's ok. It's all right.
Don't forget tomorrow night.
968
01:12:02,891 --> 01:12:06,352
- This is more fun than puttin' on a play.
- Bite your tongue.
969
01:12:06,353 --> 01:12:09,105
Ok, guys. What are we gonna do?
970
01:12:10,440 --> 01:12:14,402
Well, I think for once we should
be thoughtful, mature and adult.
971
01:12:15,445 --> 01:12:17,113
No, no. Tommy's right.
972
01:12:17,531 --> 01:12:21,867
We got a problem. It's time we grew up
and we solved it in an adult manner.
973
01:12:21,868 --> 01:12:23,911
Right. Let's go right to the top.
974
01:12:23,912 --> 01:12:26,581
What would eisenhower do
if the Russians did to the
975
01:12:26,623 --> 01:12:29,124
country what the righteous
flock has done to us?
976
01:12:29,125 --> 01:12:32,878
- Cut the fuckers' nuts off.
- Right.
977
01:12:32,879 --> 01:12:36,132
- Any more questions?
- Not a one.
978
01:12:36,758 --> 01:12:40,011
- Let's get backstage for battle plans.
- Yeah.
979
01:12:43,640 --> 01:12:46,100
- And him too!
- I don't like him.
980
01:12:46,101 --> 01:12:49,228
- What did he have to say?
- Nothing much.
981
01:12:49,229 --> 01:12:52,357
- He's takin' me to dinner.
- Dinner?
982
01:12:52,482 --> 01:12:56,235
He's takin' me to a nice,
discreet restaurant down in Miami.
983
01:12:56,236 --> 01:12:59,989
- What are you up to?
- Revenge. What are you up to?
984
01:12:59,990 --> 01:13:03,784
- Sounds good to me.
- Yeah, but this time no explosives.
985
01:13:03,785 --> 01:13:06,245
- Wait I don't get it.
- Nobody tells me nothin'.
986
01:13:06,371 --> 01:13:10,499
Commissioner. Commissioner,
you're takin' that kid to dinner?
987
01:13:10,500 --> 01:13:13,127
Just gonna put another notch
in my six-shooter.
988
01:13:13,128 --> 01:13:16,171
For god's sake, we have
an election in just over a week.
989
01:13:16,172 --> 01:13:19,216
Don't worry about it.
I'm takin' her all the way to Miami.
990
01:13:19,217 --> 01:13:22,177
But, commissioner, she
is only 17 years old.
991
01:13:22,178 --> 01:13:25,347
Oh, yeah? Then I'll only put
half a notch in my gun.
992
01:13:56,504 --> 01:13:58,255
I hope this is better
than the last one.
993
01:13:58,298 --> 01:14:01,091
At least we can see this one.
We couldn't see the other one.
994
01:14:01,092 --> 01:14:03,385
Wow! Look at that fancy costume!
995
01:14:03,386 --> 01:14:07,473
That guy's wearing argyle socks.
Must be a high-budget job.
996
01:14:07,474 --> 01:14:11,227
This director must be
the Cecil b de Mille of pussy film.
997
01:14:12,020 --> 01:14:14,229
Man, that woman is ugly.
998
01:14:14,230 --> 01:14:16,523
Hose her down, boy! Hose her down.
999
01:14:18,401 --> 01:14:20,194
Look at them tits.
1000
01:14:20,987 --> 01:14:24,532
Holy shit!
Look at the dick on that son of a bitch!
1001
01:14:26,242 --> 01:14:29,286
Mayor, that guy's dork
is bigger than yours.
1002
01:14:30,288 --> 01:14:34,788
Hey, mayor! If you had a cape like that, you
could give your secretary a flyin' fuck.
1003
01:14:36,252 --> 01:14:39,254
Look at that snatch!
1004
01:14:39,255 --> 01:14:42,383
Did reverend flavel approve of this one?
1005
01:14:42,384 --> 01:14:46,054
Approve of it?
Are you shittin' me? He gave me this one!
1006
01:14:49,516 --> 01:14:51,767
That stuff looks like diarrhea.
1007
01:14:51,768 --> 01:14:53,978
Only worse.
1008
01:14:56,231 --> 01:14:59,566
And now for the grand experiment.
1009
01:14:59,567 --> 01:15:01,777
Oh, no.
1010
01:15:02,612 --> 01:15:06,365
Wait a minute.
As you know, I am the barf inspector.
1011
01:15:06,366 --> 01:15:08,993
I gotta make sure
it has exactly the right plop.
1012
01:15:08,994 --> 01:15:12,079
Barf inspector comin' through!
Excuse me. Careful.
1013
01:15:12,080 --> 01:15:16,042
- This couldn't happen to a nicer guy.
- X marks the spot. Let her rip!
1014
01:15:20,255 --> 01:15:24,550
- Right in the eye. Ok, more corn.
- Corn. Corn.
1015
01:15:39,315 --> 01:15:43,485
Please, madame.
At la Fontana di voglio, everyone waits.
1016
01:15:43,486 --> 01:15:47,364
Please, to the back of the line.
Merci, thank you very much.
1017
01:15:47,365 --> 01:15:49,617
- Ah, monsieur gebhardt.
- Alex.
1018
01:15:49,659 --> 01:15:51,869
How good to see you, monsieur.
1019
01:15:52,454 --> 01:15:55,706
We are expecting a guest
this evening, I presume?
1020
01:15:55,707 --> 01:15:57,791
You presume correctly.
1021
01:15:57,792 --> 01:16:02,171
And at what time is your sister arriving?
Or is it your cousin this time?
1022
01:16:02,172 --> 01:16:06,672
- Actually, this one's more like my niece.
- But of course, monsieur. Of course.
1023
01:16:35,747 --> 01:16:38,332
- Is everything all set?
- All set.
1024
01:16:38,333 --> 01:16:40,751
- This is gonna be good.
- Go get 'em, Billy.
1025
01:16:40,752 --> 01:16:43,170
- Is my hood on straight?
- Can you see?
1026
01:16:43,171 --> 01:16:46,799
- Yeah.
- Then your hood's on straight, stupid!
1027
01:16:46,800 --> 01:16:49,093
Everybody's a fuckin' comedian.
1028
01:16:49,094 --> 01:16:52,346
- They oughta be here soon.
- I'm goin' down the road.
1029
01:16:52,347 --> 01:16:54,432
You be careful!
1030
01:17:11,366 --> 01:17:15,119
Where the hell are they? They sh...
1031
01:17:15,787 --> 01:17:18,080
Ok, guys, be careful.
1032
01:17:20,792 --> 01:17:22,794
Where's Mickey?
1033
01:17:26,589 --> 01:17:29,049
Where the hell is he?
1034
01:17:30,677 --> 01:17:34,013
- Hey, you klan pricks!
- Ok, guys. Let's go.
1035
01:17:34,055 --> 01:17:38,555
Yeah, you boy. Why don't you boys go on home
and choke your chicken and beat your kids?
1036
01:17:39,185 --> 01:17:41,603
That's your speed.
1037
01:17:41,604 --> 01:17:44,523
Excuse me. Have you met my friend meat?
1038
01:17:44,524 --> 01:17:49,024
Go screw your wives! You'll have to wake 'em
up and tell 'em what you're doin', though.
1039
01:17:50,155 --> 01:17:54,242
Forget him. Let's get to the meetin'.
1040
01:18:06,880 --> 01:18:09,799
Hey, where you goin'? The rally's this way.
1041
01:18:12,302 --> 01:18:14,387
Shortcut.
1042
01:18:27,400 --> 01:18:30,236
What the hell is goin' on here?
1043
01:18:36,784 --> 01:18:39,077
Evenin', boys.
1044
01:18:39,078 --> 01:18:41,288
- Howdy.
- Welcome, fellas.
1045
01:18:41,915 --> 01:18:44,416
We thought you might like
to meet a friend of ours.
1046
01:18:44,417 --> 01:18:46,919
Say what?
1047
01:18:49,631 --> 01:18:52,633
Yeah, I remember him.
1048
01:18:52,634 --> 01:18:56,387
You did a mighty fine job on him, eustace!
1049
01:18:57,138 --> 01:19:00,391
The stingy little fucker
wouldn't leave no tip.
1050
01:19:01,893 --> 01:19:05,438
Well, now, in lieu of a tip,
why don't we just return the favor?
1051
01:19:05,772 --> 01:19:08,690
Louisville tit? What did he say?
1052
01:19:08,691 --> 01:19:12,152
- What did you say, boy?
- Why don't we give you a trim?
1053
01:19:12,153 --> 01:19:15,656
Oh, you snot noses are
gonna give us a trim?
1054
01:19:19,535 --> 01:19:23,080
- Us and a few of our friends.
- A few of these friends here.
1055
01:19:28,211 --> 01:19:32,711
Well, you better bring the army, boy.
Bring the whole fuckin' us cavalry.
1056
01:19:33,091 --> 01:19:36,427
Actually, we had something
slightly different in mind.
1057
01:19:36,469 --> 01:19:38,554
- Oh, yeah?
- Oh, yeah.
1058
01:19:43,726 --> 01:19:47,688
Aw, shit! They're all fuckin' Indians.
1059
01:19:50,692 --> 01:19:54,237
Aw, shit. Oh, that's a lot of lnjuns.
1060
01:19:57,699 --> 01:20:00,743
They ain't happy. These lnjuns ain't happy.
1061
01:20:01,452 --> 01:20:04,163
Well, now. Don't be shy.
1062
01:20:04,706 --> 01:20:06,749
Excuse me.
1063
01:20:07,500 --> 01:20:09,376
Hi.
1064
01:20:09,502 --> 01:20:11,837
Now in consideration of your
status in the community,
1065
01:20:11,838 --> 01:20:15,173
we've imported a very special
gentleman to give you your clip.
1066
01:20:15,174 --> 01:20:17,718
- Allow me.
- I'd like you to meet Brian Schwartz.
1067
01:20:17,719 --> 01:20:19,928
He's Jewish. He's our mohel for the day.
1068
01:20:19,929 --> 01:20:24,429
What, you may ask, is a mohel?
Good question. A mohel is a Jewish barber.
1069
01:20:24,892 --> 01:20:27,936
- But not exactly.
- Ask him what a mohel is exactly.
1070
01:20:27,937 --> 01:20:31,273
- Come on!
- Go on, ask him.
1071
01:20:31,274 --> 01:20:34,526
- What in hell's a mohel?
- I thought you would never ask.
1072
01:20:34,527 --> 01:20:37,279
Do you remember when you had your bris?
1073
01:20:37,322 --> 01:20:40,366
Probably a barbecue and
a bris in your case.
1074
01:20:40,450 --> 01:20:43,368
- Go on, ask him what a bris is.
- What in the fuck is a bris?
1075
01:20:43,369 --> 01:20:46,413
Good question.
Well, a bris is a circumcision,
1076
01:20:46,414 --> 01:20:49,875
and a mohel is a man
who performs a bris or circumcision.
1077
01:20:49,876 --> 01:20:53,379
And this instrument is a zemel.
1078
01:20:53,713 --> 01:20:58,092
And a zemel is used
by a mohel to perform the bris.
1079
01:21:00,178 --> 01:21:02,138
- Would you hold that?
- Absolutely.
1080
01:21:02,180 --> 01:21:06,680
Now, this zemel has been used to chop
off literally hundreds of foreskins.
1081
01:21:07,185 --> 01:21:08,894
- Hundreds.
- Amen.
1082
01:21:08,895 --> 01:21:12,565
What better to shave the heads
of a bunch of pricks like you?
1083
01:21:13,399 --> 01:21:17,069
- The fuck you will!
- That's it.
1084
01:21:25,495 --> 01:21:28,414
Sit down, ansell. Sit down.
1085
01:21:31,667 --> 01:21:33,960
Line up, boys.
1086
01:21:33,961 --> 01:21:37,005
Say, now. This is gettin'
out of hand here, boys.
1087
01:21:37,006 --> 01:21:40,426
Let's talk this over, ok?
I tell you what we're gonna do.
1088
01:21:41,260 --> 01:21:43,762
We're gonna let you off this time, ok?
1089
01:21:43,763 --> 01:21:48,263
You're gonna get out of here and we don't
wanna see you around here no more.
1090
01:21:48,309 --> 01:21:50,936
- That a deal?
- Yeah, now that's fair, ain't it?
1091
01:21:51,020 --> 01:21:53,105
You gotta admit, that is fair.
1092
01:21:53,856 --> 01:21:55,941
Nah.
1093
01:21:55,942 --> 01:21:57,401
Line up, boys.
1094
01:21:57,402 --> 01:22:01,902
We'll most certainly have
to retire this zemel after this job.
1095
01:22:36,274 --> 01:22:39,318
- Madame, we'll wait.
- That will be grand.
1096
01:22:54,459 --> 01:22:57,587
You sly devil. I just can't stand it.
1097
01:22:57,879 --> 01:23:01,214
Look Jack, I'll have you know
I'm the guest of big Bobby gebhardt.
1098
01:23:01,215 --> 01:23:04,009
County commissioner of seward
county and a very big deal.
1099
01:23:04,051 --> 01:23:05,802
- You better take me
to his table pronto.
1100
01:23:05,803 --> 01:23:07,721
- Please madame, please.
What is the problem
1101
01:23:08,014 --> 01:23:11,516
I happen to be the guest
of big Bob gebhardt,
1102
01:23:11,517 --> 01:23:15,479
county commissioner
of seward county, and a very big deal.
1103
01:23:15,480 --> 01:23:18,191
You better take me to his table pronto.
1104
01:23:18,524 --> 01:23:22,903
- Are you sure it's commissioner gebhardt?
- Move it, dildo breath!
1105
01:23:24,238 --> 01:23:27,783
Giddyup! Whoa, what an ass!
1106
01:23:30,620 --> 01:23:34,581
Bobby! Oh, Bobby!
1107
01:23:34,582 --> 01:23:38,669
Little Bobby gebhardt, where are you?
1108
01:23:38,961 --> 01:23:43,340
It's your little snatchy-poo!
1109
01:23:43,758 --> 01:23:48,258
What are you waitin' around for?
Roll 'em out! Git along, little doggies.
1110
01:23:49,847 --> 01:23:52,057
We're here, jackass!
1111
01:23:54,477 --> 01:23:57,521
Bobby. Baby.
1112
01:24:00,650 --> 01:24:02,109
Oh, my god.
1113
01:24:08,074 --> 01:24:11,118
What are you doin'? Are you crazy?
1114
01:24:11,202 --> 01:24:13,495
I'm crazy for you, you big horse.
1115
01:24:13,538 --> 01:24:15,623
I want a drink. Gar-con!
1116
01:24:16,582 --> 01:24:19,626
Gar-con! What's the matter stupid?
Don't you speak French?
1117
01:24:19,669 --> 01:24:21,045
Yeah. Oui, oui.
1118
01:24:21,087 --> 01:24:25,587
Well, get me a drink.
It's my birthday today.
1119
01:24:26,092 --> 01:24:28,177
I'm 17 today.
1120
01:24:28,928 --> 01:24:31,639
Golly. 17!
1121
01:24:31,722 --> 01:24:33,515
Don't say 17.
1122
01:24:33,641 --> 01:24:36,644
Sweet 17 and never been kissed.
1123
01:24:38,187 --> 01:24:40,689
That kid is 23. 20.
1124
01:24:41,065 --> 01:24:43,567
Where does the time go?
1125
01:24:43,651 --> 01:24:48,151
Why, do you realize
i was only 14 when we first met?
1126
01:24:48,864 --> 01:24:52,117
I don't know her. Isn't this crazy?
1127
01:24:52,159 --> 01:24:56,659
It was so romantic. I was a brownie
in his wife's girl scout troop.
1128
01:24:58,291 --> 01:25:02,044
- You swine!
- Gimme a Shirley temple.
1129
01:25:07,675 --> 01:25:09,635
It's my niece. She does it all the time.
1130
01:25:09,677 --> 01:25:13,138
You should have seen her
last year at the elks club.
1131
01:25:13,764 --> 01:25:18,264
Hey, what are you doin' with my boa?
Are you some kind of sickie? Pervert!
1132
01:25:21,230 --> 01:25:23,440
Very cute. Well, I'm leaving.
1133
01:25:23,441 --> 01:25:25,860
Get out of that chair and I'll yell "rape."
1134
01:25:25,901 --> 01:25:28,194
- You'll what?
- I'll yell "rape."
1135
01:25:29,322 --> 01:25:31,532
You're bluffing.
1136
01:25:34,869 --> 01:25:35,870
Rape!
1137
01:25:36,370 --> 01:25:37,371
Rape!
1138
01:25:38,039 --> 01:25:42,418
Oh, Bobby, don't leave me.
I can't have our baby alone.
1139
01:25:46,464 --> 01:25:50,009
My daughter's so funny. She's just wild.
1140
01:25:50,426 --> 01:25:54,513
How's that grab you?
Now sit there and take your medicine.
1141
01:25:56,724 --> 01:25:58,767
She never stops. She's so quick.
1142
01:26:01,354 --> 01:26:04,065
Yes, yes, that's it. That's right, brother.
1143
01:26:04,190 --> 01:26:07,526
Let's all stand up for Jesus.
1144
01:26:07,777 --> 01:26:11,739
Till every foe is vanquished.
1145
01:26:11,781 --> 01:26:15,743
And Christ is lord indeed.
1146
01:26:15,868 --> 01:26:20,368
Stand up, stand up for Jesus.
1147
01:26:20,539 --> 01:26:24,626
Ye soldiers of the cross.
1148
01:26:24,669 --> 01:26:29,048
Lift high his royal banner.
1149
01:26:29,173 --> 01:26:33,673
It must not suffer loss.
1150
01:26:33,803 --> 01:26:38,303
From victory unto victory.
1151
01:26:38,391 --> 01:26:42,728
His army shall he lead.
1152
01:26:42,812 --> 01:26:47,312
Till every foe is vanquished.
1153
01:26:47,566 --> 01:26:52,066
And Christ is lord indeed.
1154
01:26:52,321 --> 01:26:56,616
Thank you, brothers,
for that inspirational hymn about Jesus.
1155
01:26:57,243 --> 01:26:59,745
And now, friends, as I was say...
1156
01:27:07,837 --> 01:27:10,339
As I was sayin'...
1157
01:27:21,892 --> 01:27:23,894
Good lord.
1158
01:27:28,858 --> 01:27:31,277
- Is this part of the show?
- I don't know.
1159
01:27:37,491 --> 01:27:39,868
What a bunch of assholes.
Yeah, I'll say so.
1160
01:27:39,910 --> 01:27:41,703
Do you recognize any of them?
1161
01:27:41,829 --> 01:27:44,957
Hold it! Hold, I say.
1162
01:27:45,082 --> 01:27:47,375
Stand, I say.
1163
01:27:48,043 --> 01:27:52,543
Behold, the spawn of Satan.
1164
01:27:53,215 --> 01:27:56,384
The bowels of perdition.
1165
01:27:57,052 --> 01:28:01,552
- Hear my words. I speak salvation.
- Right, get ready.
1166
01:28:02,516 --> 01:28:05,435
- I speak redemption.
- Now!
1167
01:28:06,479 --> 01:28:09,398
Verily I say this to thee.
1168
01:28:09,648 --> 01:28:14,148
Holy shit!
Look at the dick on that son of a bitch.
1169
01:28:18,407 --> 01:28:21,868
Mayor, that guy's dork
is bigger than yours.
1170
01:28:24,121 --> 01:28:27,457
Hey, mayor! If you get
yourself one of those capes
1171
01:28:27,500 --> 01:28:30,419
you could give your
secretary a flyin' fuck.
1172
01:28:30,753 --> 01:28:34,923
- Look at the size of that snatch!
- Oh, mother.
1173
01:28:37,760 --> 01:28:42,260
- Did reverend flavel approve of this one?
- You scum!
1174
01:28:42,973 --> 01:28:46,518
Approve?
Hell, reverend flavel gave me this one.
1175
01:28:47,228 --> 01:28:49,939
I can explain it to you. Let me tell you.
1176
01:28:55,402 --> 01:28:58,947
It's all right. I swear it's gonna be ok.
1177
01:28:59,198 --> 01:29:02,659
It's the goddamn communist...
1178
01:29:02,868 --> 01:29:06,955
Those sons of bitches...
You son of a bitch! You get out of here.
1179
01:29:09,917 --> 01:29:14,417
I told you to get out!
I tell ya, it's gonna be ok.
1180
01:29:15,005 --> 01:29:17,924
Aw, shit!
1181
01:29:44,076 --> 01:29:46,286
God, I needed that.
1182
01:29:47,997 --> 01:29:52,376
Oh, don't worry.
Commissioner gebhardt'll pay for it.
1183
01:29:52,501 --> 01:29:55,962
He's county commissioner
of seward county, for piss sakes.
1184
01:29:57,214 --> 01:30:01,714
You don't think he's gonna stick ya
for a 50-cent drink, for piss sakes?
1185
01:30:02,845 --> 01:30:05,138
Hey, waiter!
1186
01:30:05,973 --> 01:30:06,974
Hey waiter!
1187
01:30:09,101 --> 01:30:10,102
Hey waiter!
1188
01:30:11,228 --> 01:30:15,190
Put shitface's drink here
on commissioner gebhardt's bill.
1189
01:30:15,900 --> 01:30:19,153
For piss sakes, he's up
for reelection in two weeks.
1190
01:30:19,320 --> 01:30:21,739
Do you think he needs this shit?
1191
01:30:23,240 --> 01:30:27,740
- She's crazy.
- Your ass sucks canal water, buddy.
1192
01:30:30,122 --> 01:30:34,084
Oh, there's my Shirley temple.
1193
01:30:34,251 --> 01:30:37,087
Hey, where's my cherry?
1194
01:30:37,630 --> 01:30:39,840
Who got my cherry?
1195
01:30:40,174 --> 01:30:42,259
Bobby.
1196
01:30:46,972 --> 01:30:49,891
Bobby, I lost my cherry.
1197
01:30:51,310 --> 01:30:53,395
Bobby.
1198
01:30:53,479 --> 01:30:57,149
Did you get my cherry again?
1199
01:30:57,232 --> 01:30:59,943
You saucy little devil.
1200
01:31:00,069 --> 01:31:03,530
You can't get a girl's cherry twice.
1201
01:31:03,572 --> 01:31:06,199
You sly goose.
1202
01:31:21,840 --> 01:31:24,425
Oh, my god.
1203
01:31:32,142 --> 01:31:34,769
On, Bobby.
1204
01:31:35,771 --> 01:31:39,733
Bobby, I think I'm gonna be... sick.
1205
01:31:40,484 --> 01:31:42,694
Don't be sick.
1206
01:31:43,529 --> 01:31:45,948
Bobby, I am. I'm gonna be...
1207
01:31:49,368 --> 01:31:52,621
Not the pool. No, not the pool.
1208
01:32:06,301 --> 01:32:09,137
Back to Howard Johnson's.
1209
01:32:46,216 --> 01:32:49,135
Boy, it sure tastes better goin' down.
1210
01:32:50,971 --> 01:32:53,598
Well, I feel better now.
1211
01:32:54,683 --> 01:32:56,768
Bye.
1212
01:32:57,186 --> 01:32:59,396
Oh, my bag. Don't wanna forget my bag.
1213
01:33:02,816 --> 01:33:05,318
Well, farewell!
1214
01:33:07,780 --> 01:33:09,990
Ben, what's goin' on?
1215
01:33:13,327 --> 01:33:16,788
I will sue you!
You will not have a pot to piss in!
1216
01:33:16,955 --> 01:33:19,165
Look!
1217
01:33:26,965 --> 01:33:31,135
My tit! You broke my tit!
1218
01:33:31,178 --> 01:33:34,848
I'm gonna sue you! Where are my lawyers?
1219
01:33:35,557 --> 01:33:40,057
- Come on, boys. Pictures! I want pictures!
- Say "I'm ruined."
1220
01:33:40,729 --> 01:33:45,024
- Oh, shit.
- Another one. More pictures. This is nice.
1221
01:33:50,864 --> 01:33:53,783
Good luck in the election.
I'll see you at the polls.
1222
01:33:53,826 --> 01:33:57,287
This is the most disgusting display
i have ever seen.
1223
01:33:57,371 --> 01:33:59,998
What a dump! We're leaving.
1224
01:34:02,501 --> 01:34:05,128
We're off to see the wizard.
1225
01:34:05,129 --> 01:34:06,797
The wonderful wizard of oz.
1226
01:34:06,880 --> 01:34:08,590
Because, because, because.
1227
01:34:08,715 --> 01:34:10,675
Because of the wonderful things he does.
1228
01:34:10,717 --> 01:34:11,968
We're off to see the wizard...
1229
01:35:32,424 --> 01:35:36,924
- Good luck in the election, commissioner.
- Let me discuss the issues with you.
1230
01:35:37,304 --> 01:35:40,181
- Commissioner couch. Republican.
- Yeah.
1231
01:35:40,390 --> 01:35:42,183
Good luck in the elections.
1232
01:35:43,894 --> 01:35:47,147
Wait! Wait, don't go. Stop!
1233
01:35:48,982 --> 01:35:51,401
Don't go. Wait!
1234
01:35:51,485 --> 01:35:53,695
Stop!
1235
01:35:55,656 --> 01:35:57,866
April fool!
1236
01:36:19,304 --> 01:36:23,804
What the hell are you hittin' me for? Lady,
I'm warnin' you. Don't hit me no more...
1237
01:36:27,187 --> 01:36:29,397
Well, I warned you.
1238
01:36:29,940 --> 01:36:34,440
Don't just lie there all spread-eagled
like that. It looks obscene.
1239
01:37:07,060 --> 01:37:10,813
You are a disgrace to the profession.
1240
01:37:10,981 --> 01:37:13,566
You are... je ne sais quoi...
1241
01:37:13,775 --> 01:37:15,651
Relieved of duty.
1242
01:37:15,777 --> 01:37:20,277
I am the new Matt re de
la Fontana di voglio.99266
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