All language subtitles for Bring.The.Funny.S01E02_English

[dramatic music]

� This is "Bring the Funny."

We are back
like we left something.

� Tell. Us. Some. Jokes.

both: [chanting]
Jokes, jokes, jokes.

[pop music]

[all cheering]

both: ♪ We're gonna be
the end of the world ♪

� Oh, oh!

� "This is ridiculous!"

[laughter]

� That's the right answer.
[all hollering]

� Somebody gotta die.
� Somebody.

� Somebody's gonna die.

� I'm aiming between your eyes.

Keep still, Jeff.
� Oh, snap.

[sinister music]

� [screaming]

� Yes, there you go!

� I haven't been touched
like that in a long, long time.

[both laughing]

� Please welcome your emcee,

Amanda Seales!

[cheers and applause]

� Welcome to
"Bring the Funny"!

[cheers and applause]

Tonight,
we're bringing you comics

from all over the globe
and all over the comedy map.

I'm talking sketch,
stand�up, variety.

You name it, we've got it.

At the end of the show,

our judges will choose six��
only six��

to move on
to the Comedy Clash round.

So, let's say hello
to the three people

who bring the funny 24/7.

First up, he's a hugely
successful stand�up,

actor, TV personality, author.

Give it up
for Mr. Jeff Foxworthy!

[cheers and applause]

Next, she's the queen
of the Tweets,

the grande dame
of the 'Gram,

and a straight�up
viral vigilante,

everyone please say hello
to miss Chrissy Teigen!

� Whoo!

� And finally,
he puts the "fun" in funny,

the "me" in comedy,
and the "ha" in Steve Harvey,

it's Kenan Thompson!

� Oh, I think I'm looking
forward to some good jokes.

I can't even get through it!

I'm looking for the funny.

� Give it up
for Kenan Thompson!

[cheers and applause]

� [laughing]

� So, are y'all ready
to meet your first act?

� Yes, please.

� Well, this act is cut
from the same cloth

as some of the greats
and will leave you in stitches.

Here's Randy Feltface.

� [British accent]
Anyone in there?

Can I get large fries?

Maybe a��a soda?

Anyone?

Anyone in there?
Woooo!

Hello, my name is Randy.

I'm a comedian from Australia.

Just a tiny little
country town

in the middle of nowhere.

Morning, Gary!

As soon as comedy became
an obsession for me, uh,

I started performing
as often as possible.

Any family gathering,

I would be
doing comedy routines.

And they loved it!

Particularly Mum.

She's a huge inspiration
for me, my mother.

She would always say to me,

"Randy, you can
achieve anything.

Anything is possible."

� The best advice
I ever gave my child

was to get a real job.

� And here I am.

I'm very, very, very lucky
to be here.

To be honest, I just want
to make my mum proud.

� He's not gonna win.
[grunts]

[laughter]

� Oh, yes.
[laughing]

� Wow!

"Bring the Funny"!

� [laughing]
� Yes!

Look at you beautiful people!

Am I looking at you?
My eyeballs aren't real.

I have no idea
what's happening.

Uh, I'm from Australia,
and in case you're wondering,

yes, we all look like this.

But I'm so excited
to be here in America!

I love it here!
You guys are awesome!

I love my sports.

You guys love your sports.

You know my favorite
spectator sport?

Line rage.

You know how,
in the supermarket,

you can boop your own stuff?

Yeah?

That's line rage in action
right there.

Yeah.

I just love watching
impatient people

standing in line
losing their minds!

[laughter]

'Cause we got so sick
of watching other people

slowly scanning our goods,
we're like, "Give me that!

Let me do it!"
[beeping]

That's how you do it.
[rapid beeping]

Not getting old here!
Check this out.

[beeping]

Wait.
[beeping]

Right, so I'm standing here,
right?

I'm in the line.

There's a man standing
in front of me

with impatient veins of fury
popping out of his neck.

Just...
[growls]

There's��there's like six
self�checkout machines.

Two of them are broken,

because two of them are
always broken for some reason.

The four people

using the remaining
self�checkout machines

had never done it before.

How does that even happen?

We've had them for years!

I was giggling like an idiot.

The guy in front of me
was having a stroke

while, simultaneously,

four people all just
stood there going...

[laughter]

[beeps]
Ooh!

[beeps]
[goofy exclamation]

And the guy in front of me
just lost it.

He was like, "Oh, come on!

This is ridiculous!"

Turning around to me
to try to absorb me

into his bubble of hatred.

"Can you believe this?"

Like it's
the greatest injustice

he'd ever encountered.

It's a supermarket queue,
buddy.

Relax.

You guys have been great!
Thank you very much!

Good night, thank you!

[cheers and applause]

[snazzy pop music]

♪ ♪

Hello!

� Can I have a��
� Yes, of course.

Slip me some felt.
� [laughs]

This is a first experience.

I've never chatted
with a puppet before,

so pardon if I'm seeming
a little awkward.

� Is he wearing pants?
I gotta know.

� Absolutely not.
[laughter]

You gotta feel loose
when you're on stage, Jeff!

You gotta feel free
and breezy, my friend!

� [laughing]

� I love puppets.

I was thoroughly excited to see
a puppet come out just now

and, like, I couldn't have
enjoyed it more.

I wish my kids were sitting
right here next to me

so we could all be
like little kids watching.

I thought your material
was brilliant.

Yeah, you're��you're
a master puppeteer, so��

� Thank you so much, man.

� It looked like I was watching
a human being.

� That means a lot!
Thank you!

� Yeah.
� Did you hear that?

My God, that was so nice.

� Oh, my God,
I love it so much.

[laughter]

� Hi, Chrissy!
� Hi.

� How are you?

� I come from a different
place, a little bit.

I came into this show
and they were like,

"What kind of stuff
do you not like?"

And I was always like,

"I don't really like
puppet stuff."

[audience boos]
I don't, um��sorry, sorry.

But, I don't know.

I honestly got lost
in your puppet world.

[cheers and applause]

I think you're really good
at your hand movements,

and you get lost a little bit.

Um, upon seeing you, you forget
that you are a puppet,

like, uh, in a weird way.

Clearly you are, uh,
very much a puppet.

� Uh�huh.
� [laughs]

[laughter]

� We're over��
we're over here.

� You look very real.
� We're over here.

� Are you��you gotta say
left or right.

� We're to the right.

To the right a little bit.
� We're here.

� To the right, to the right...
� A little more.

Yeah, there we go!
� Yeah, there we go!

[laughter]

� So this is the thing for me:
I like being surprised.

I remember Chrissy saying,

"Yeah, I don't really
like puppets."

And as you're up there,

she starts this little
giggle thing she does.

Yeah, there it is.
There it is, right there.

And I'm like, "Holy cow."
So you love to be surprised.

And not��every form of comedy's
not for every person,

but, like you...

� You love it.
� You were losing it.

You love that.

I love your physicality.

I��I'm sitting there
watching you going,

"You should give a shop class
to stand�up comedians

on how to use your physicality
to enhance your jokes."

Great job, terrific.
� Wow, thank you so much.

Appreciate that.
Thank you.

� That a boy, Feltface.

� Bye, Randy!

He's really cute.

� If I could just get
a dry martini,

uh, dirty as you can make it,
that would be fantastic.

� I wanna see the real Randy.

� His puppeteering skills
are amazing.

� I also don't know
if I want to.

Love the fantasy so much,

I don't wanna, like,
see Greg laying down there

all tired and, like, mid�30s
trying to figure his life out.

� Do you think
he is Australian?

� [laughing]

� Ooh, magic, magic!

� Whoo!

� ♪ Does your wife look
the same as when you met her? ♪

� Better.
� ♪ That's the right answer ♪

� Nice!
� My grandmother had 21 kids.

They didn't have Netflix
back then.

It was all chill.

� My first memory
is showering with my father,

and that's all fine
until one week you're too old

and you turn to the right...

� Uno, dos, tres, plato.

� Do you know who Pitbull is?

� Stand up!
Perfect head, perfect body,

perfect mustache��
Perfect.

Don't let that mustache
do all that work.

Take a seat now!

.

[peppy pop music]

� Are you kidding me?

� Oh, my God.
� Oh, my gosh!

� We don't have them, sir.
� How are you?

Jay friggin' Leno is here.

� This is my comedy hero,
right here.

� Yes!

� Yeah, right.

� See you later.
� Take care, man.

� No big deal.

Just��you're all in
the presence of greatness.

� [sharp exhale]

You got this.
Business as "yooj."

Business as "yooj."

� This next performer
has a mom, a dad

and just the right amount

of childhood trauma
to be funny.

This is Michael Longfellow.

♪ ♪

� Hello, class.

Today, we're studying
the anatomy of a comedian.

This specimen
is Michael Longfellow.

Let's start up top.
Cranium.

The shape of it indicates

a fair amount
of brain activity.

And maybe he wore hats a little
too tight in middle school.

Records do show he went
to Arizona State University

and got an English degree.

Boy, I bet that's really busted
down the doors, huh, Mike?

Do the banks have a vault
big enough, Mike?

Like many people
except for my uncle,

he has two hands.

His hands are calloused
from holding a microphone

two to three times a night
for the past six years.

Can you imagine?

It's my opinion
that Michael is indeed ready

to bring the funny.

Don't mess this up for us.

� Give it up
for Michael Longfellow.

[cheers and applause]

� Michael Longfellow!

He is a long fellow!

� He is a long fellow.

� Hey, how's it going?

How's everybody doing?
� Good!

� I grew up
with divorced parents.

Any divorced people here?
Broken homes?

Broken home nation,
where we at?

� [whistling]

� My parents got divorced
when I was like a baby�baby.

I was, like, months old.

I don't remember
them being together ever.

The idea sickens me.

[laughter]

It's gross.

I didn't even know
if they really knew each other

until I was older.

It was just like,
"That's my mom adult,

"that's my dad adult.

"Sometimes they wave,
but I wave at the mailman.

I don't know that guy."
[laughter]

My first memory
is showering with my father.

[audience laughs, groans]

One shower too many, you know?

[laughter]

Just one week too old.

This brain switch flipped.

I should have told him, "Oh,
I think I remember things now."

[laughter]

I don't think there's no one

behind these eyes anymore,
Papa.

� [laughing]

� 'Cause he was like
a single dad,

so you can't��
you couldn't leave me.

I was a baby.
You can't leave me.

So he was just like,
"Uh, yeah get in."

Scrub�a�dub
for a little while.

And that's all fine
until one week you're too old

and you turn to the right
and you never forget.

You're just...

Just��it was huge, dude.

I remember it being huge,
you know?

But I was tiny.

I was tiny, so who knows?

We don't know.

[laughter]

I'd love to get another look,

but how do you bring that up,
you know?

But I wanna see for the scale.

I wanna know for the scale.

� [laughing]

� I bet it's like
when you drive by

your old elementary school
and you're like,

"What, it's only that big?
That's crazy."

[laughter]

Hey, that's it for me.
Thank you guys.

You guys were great.

Thank you.

Thank you.
� Good job.

[cheers and applause]

� Thanks.

[cheers and applause]

� All right, Longfellow.
� Hey.

� Chrissy.
� Yes?

� Your thoughts?

� I��I mean, you��
the second you walked out,

you had this very natural
ability with comedy.

Um, I��I love the way
you told your jokes, I love...

� Thank you.

� I love that you look
so joyful

and your entrance is so joyful,

but I also love that there was,
like, a darker topic with it.

� [laughs]

� I like that juxtaposition.
� But can I say this?

It��because I always��

people always labeled me
as a clean comedian,

and I sometimes resent that
because I thought

"clean" implies "not as funny."

And��and I would always say,
"No, that is not the case."

You can talk about
any subject��

like taking a shower
with your dad��

you just have to find a way
to say it without saying it,

and you did that.

You are a terrific��
I would pay money

to go see you perform.

� Oh, wow!

Thank you!

� From the moment you came out,

it looked like
it didn't matter what happened.

You were just gonna have
a good time for you,

and��and I think that's
what makes a great stand�up.

You're having a good time
and that's infectious,

so great job, man.

� Thank you, Kenan.
Thank you guys.

Thank you, all three of you.

� All right, give it up
for Michael Longfellow.

� Thanks.
� Thank you.

♪ ♪

� Might be my favorite stand�up
I've seen today.

� Solid.

� The pace��
� Foxworthy approved.

If any other comedians
or aspiring comedians see him,

they're like,
"Oh, this is easy.

I can do this."

'Cause he makes it
look effortless.

� Yep, and it's so not.

♪ ♪

.

[funky pop music]

� ♪ "All That" ♪

� "All That."

I told you I had that song
stuck in my head yesterday.

� 25 years.

� Thank God they remember
some of it, right?

� Kenan, remember our days
on Nickelodeon?

� Yep.

� Way back in the day,
he was on...

♪ "All That" ♪
� Yeah.

� I used to shoot
"My Brother and Me"

across the hall
in another studio.

� Crazy.

� We were young, we were fresh.
So innocent.

� Babies.
Little babies.

� And look at us now.

Old.

� [laughs]

� Our next act is one big,
happy comedy family,

proving that in comedy,
there's room for everyone.

This is Room 28.

� We're...
all: Room 28.

� A sketch group from...
all: New York City.

� And we like to finish
each other's...

all: Sentences!
� Stop doing this.

� Yeah, that was really hard.

� And we are here to...
all: Bring the funny!

� Party!

� "The party"?
What are you talking about?

� I mean, you know,
they'll get it.

� No, no.
� The Funny!

[laughter and applause]

� [sighs]

� Thanks for inviting me over,
Theresa.

� I am so glad
that you're here, Stephen.

My house guest, Pitbull,

has been driving me crazy
this weekend.

� "Pitbull"?
I didn't know you had a dog.

� No, international rap star
Pitbull.

� Okay, there's no way
that Pitbull��

� [hollering]
Yeah, yeah!

[laughter]

♪ Just took a nap, nap,
and it felt good, good ♪

♪ But now I'm so hungry ♪

♪ I need some food, food ♪

Dial it, Mr. 305.
What's up, baby?

[laughs]
� Yeah, okay, Pit.

Um, this is my friend, Stephen.

� One, two, three, fork.

Uno, dos, tres, plato.

[laughs]

� Yo! Yo!

Yo, how are you not excited
about this?

� I've known him
since high school.

I mean, don't get me wrong,
he's a great guy.

It's just, he turns
everything he says

into an annoyingly catchy song.

� What do you mean?
� One, two, three, package.

♪ I got a package ♪
� ♪ Package ♪

� ♪ See what's inside ♪
� ♪ Side ♪

� ♪ A brand�new soul patch
for Mr. Worldwide, wide, wide ♪

[laughs]
Got it, baby.

� Yeah, maybe he should
sleep somewhere else.

� Well, I can't just kick my
Grammy�award�winning friend out

on the street.

Besides, I think
he really likes it here.

� ♪ I said, it's game night,
game night ♪

♪ 'Bout to bring you down ♪

♪ So get your game right,
game right ♪

♪ I got Ne�Yo in the house ♪

� ♪ Tonight ♪
� [gasps]

� ♪ Gonna play
some board games tonight ♪

� Oh, my God, it's
international R&B superstar

and "World of Dance" judge,
Ne�Yo!

� Yeah.

Yeah, they hang out a lot.

Look, Armando, enough with
the random musical outbursts!

I mean, for once,
can you just talk to me

like a regular person
and not a walking playlist?

[laughter]

Sorry, but it's just like...

� I know you're angry.
� Yeah.

� ♪ You know, I'm sorry ♪
� This is not another song!

� Okay, look, look, look,
I just always thought

you liked my singing
and my backup dancer and Ne�Yo.

� ♪ Tonight�� ♪
� That's enough, Ne�Yo.

[laughter]

Adios, Theresa.

I can't believe my friend
from high school

is kicking me out on my...

all: Culo!

[doorbell rings]

� Are you expecting
somebody else?

� Oh, right.
I think that might be��

� Ow!

� [laughs]
� Yo!

� It's your girl, Cardi!

And let me tell you
something,

that flight was not
"ok�rrr."

[all cheering]

� Pit, you know I like
my personal space.

You know I like it.

Can you please keep it down?

Because I have neighbors.

Please.

[cheers and applause]

♪ ♪

� Oh, my God,
it's Jeff Foxworthy!

[all cheering]

� [laughing]
I looked at Jeff��I was like,

"Do you know who Pitbull is?"

� So, all great comedy,

doesn't matter
if it's stand�up or sketch,

it begins with a great
premise.

This is a great premise,
that somebody has Pitbull

from high school
staying at their house.

� It's like my house.

� This is all I could think:
when I was hosting

"Are You Smarter
than a 5th Grader?"��

one night I'm doing
"The Tonight Show"

with Jimmy Fallon, and the
other guest was Pitbull.

And��and I kept thinking,

"Well, Pitbull will just be
like a regular guy."

No, he was that
the entire time!

And��and so I'm like,
"Oh, my God,

this is right on
the money there."

Great job, guys.

� I thought it was great,
you know.

It was, uh��
it's tough doing sketch.

You have to, like,
win us over,

and sometimes it takes a while
to do that.

But by the time Cardi came in,
I was already, like,

sold on the whole thing.

If I were to say
one thing about it,

I think hearing��
being able to hear

everybody's impressions
is vital.

So, Pitbull, sometimes it was
a little hard to understand

what you were saying, you know?

� Okay.

� I mean, I thought
that was really great.

I��I was surprised
at every moment,

and I just never knew
who was gonna come out next.

� That's right.
� It was really good.

[cheers and applause]

� Give it up for Mister��

I was about to say,
"Give it up for Mr. Worldwide."

[laughter]

Give it up for Room 28, y'all!

[cheers and applause]

♪ ♪

� I hear he's one of the nicest
people on the planet.

� Oh, he was nice
as he could be,

but the whole time
he's still Pitbull.

� [as Pitbull]
Mr. 305.

You know what I mean?

Can't believe
[murmurs].

� [laughing]

.

� Welcome back
to "Bring the Funny."

� Oh, yeah!
� Yes!

� We're halfway through
tonight's comedy lineup,

and here's what I've learned.

The funny is officially
being brought, y'all.

� That's right.
� Yes, yes, yes!

� Tell. Us. Some. Jokes.

both: Jokes, jokes, jokes.
� Be funny.

both: Be funny.
� Be better, better.

Work better.
� ♪ Do something crazy ♪

� The only obstacles
that are gonna stop you

are the obstacles you put
in front of yourself, okay?

Now, wipe them away
and dance them off.

� Willy Appelman!

� Whoo!

Yes, yes, yes!
� [laughing]

� [laughing]
[squeals]

Oh!
[hollers]

Yeah, oh!

Yes!
� [laughing]

� Now, I hope you guys
didn't come here

to learn how to dance,
'cause I don't teach dance.

No, no, no, no.
I teach life through dance.

� I kind of like this already.

� "But, Danny,
I don't want to change.

I like who I am."
Leave.

� [laughs]
� Jeff, stand up!

[cheers and applause]

Perfect head, perfect body,
perfect.

But don't let that mustache
do all that work.

Take a seat!
Yes!

Chrissy, stand up!
� Me?

� You guys feel that energy?
You've got a flame.

Let it out.
Burn down the forest.

That's literally what I did.
I burnt down the forest.

Take a seat!

Kenan, are you
a principal dancer

for the New York City Ballet?

Could be.
� Oh.

� Take a seat.

� [laughs]

� [laughs]
� Great character work.

I thought it was awesome.
Super bold choice.

Super bold outfit choice.

It takes so much courage
to come out and just do that.

� I'm super funny, um...

� ♪ Do something crazy ♪

� It's so hard to come up
with something like stand�up

that's your own,
that's clever, funny.

You know what I mean?
� Absolutely.

� Give it up
for Daphnique Springs.

� I have OCD,
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

I was dating this guy.

He was handsome, honest,
and successful,

but he kept leaving time
on the microwave.

� [laughs]

� I was like, "Yo, I would
rather you cheat on me

than leave time
on the microwave."

� Are you really OCD?
� Oh, it's crazy.

This morning,
somebody closed my car door

with their fingerprints
on the glass.

� [laughs]
� [growls]

� Somebody gotta die.
� Somebody.

� Somebody's gonna die.
� ♪ We just wanna have fun ♪

♪ Hey ♪
� You've gotta deliver.

You know, we live in a market

where there's a million things
on the shelf.

You've gotta stand out.
� Yeah.

� Show me that.
� Show it to him.

� Please welcome ISMO.

� Like, English is full of
letters that are��are silent.

You know, like letters that��
that you write down

but never say.

Like, I don't want to say
the silent letters are dumb

because I might
accidentally say

that they are "dum�b."

� [laughs]

� Why not also then
have silent numbers?

I think those would be
far more useful.

Like, "I owe you $75.

Ah, but the 7 is silent."

[laughter]
Thank you.

� I wanna be able to say, like,

"Well, this could have
been fixed,"

or "you should have been
this way, this way, this way."

But I really loved that.
� Thank you.

� Cherish this moment.

It's not gonna happen
very often in your life

when a beautiful woman
looks at you and says,

"I wanna tell you
something to fix,

but I can't think of anything."

� ♪ Do something crazy ♪

� Give it up for ISMO, y'all.

� It's all subjective.

It's so funny
how subjective everything is.

� It's just an interesting
experience, honestly.

� It's kind of cray.

� Oh, this is getting
tougher and tougher.

� [British accent]
Oh, that's a shock.

God, look at me.

Right, here we go.

� Our next act is like
the Mary Poppins of comedy,

and she's hoping
to pull a few tricks

from her bag
of comedy treats tonight.

� Right, here we go.

I'm ready.

� This is Mandy Muden.

� Yeah!

[cheers and applause]

Hello, Mandy.
� Hi, go ahead.

[cheers and applause]

[upbeat pop music]

� Hello.
� [British accent] Hello.

� I'm Mandy.
I do tricks.

[saucy music]

� [laughs]
� Whoo!

Magic, magic.

� What?
� Oh!

� Still single.

[laughter]

Actually, I'm single
by choice.

� Whoo!
� Mens' choice.

[laughter]

Little bit
of holiday reading.

[laughter]

� What?

� I got that from the Ikea
suppository range.

You put it up yourself.

Jeff, would you join me
onstage?

� Oh!
� Yeah, get up there, Jeff.

[cheers and applause]

� Have you done magic before,
Jeff?

� I have not.
� No?

Jeff, now touch any card
you like.

Take it out.
Look at it.

Now, if I was to tell you
the name of that card,

would you be impressed?

� Yes.

� That one is actually
the Nine of Clubs, everybody.

[laughter and applause]

Go ahead
and take another one, Jeff.

Take it out and look at it.

Just sign your name across
the front of there, Jeff.

And, um, just write
your credit card number on.

That's it, lovely.

� I'm not writing
my credit card number.

� All right, have you done it?
� Okay.

� Everybody roughly see that
all right?

Everybody got that?
� Yes, ma'am.

� Okay, lovely.
I'm gonna take that.

I'm gonna bury that
into the middle of the pack.

It's gone.
It's lost forever.

Do you wanna shuffle those?

I'm sure you do.
� [laughs]

� Now, to make sure

we can't get
to little Jeff's card,

I'm gonna wrap the cards up,
Jeff, like a little packet.

Do you like danger, Jeff?
� Yes.

� I thought you might,
you little rascal.

Now, take that.

Hold that in front
of your face.

Take a step back.
Just over to the side, dear.

And we're gonna
find Jeff's card

in a very special way.

Knife throwing.
� Oh, snap.

[applause]

� Here we go, Jeff.

I'm aiming
between your eyes, darling.

That's it.

Just hold it up
between your eyes.

That's it.

Keep still, Jeff,

'cause it's quite hard
to hit a moving target.

Go on, Jeff.
You're all right, love.

Chrissy, can you throw that
at Jeff?

� No!

� It'll kill you,
but it's a lovely trick.

� No, I love him.

� Should we let
little Jeff off?

Jeff, I'm just gonna
take the knife, darling,

and I'm just going
to, uh, bury it

into the middle
of the pack, 'kay?

Now, for the first time, Jeff,

what was the name of your card?

� Two of Hearts.

� Oh!

� Was it that
Two of Hearts, Jeff?

� Oh, wow!

� What?
� That's magic!

That's magic, baby!

� Jeff, thank you so much!

Jeff, thank you.

� That was very great.
[laughter]

[cheers and applause]

♪ ♪

[laughter]

[cheers and applause]

� You're safe now.
[laughter]

[cheers and applause]

� Hi!
� Hi, Mandy.

� Hi, Amanda.

� I haven't been touched
like that in a long, long time.

Uh...
[stammers, laughs]

Great job.

I mean, it's��this is
what comedy in magic is.

And I'm this far away from you,

and I don't how you did that
with the card.

Terrific job.
Thank you.

[cheers and applause]

� I love magic.

I am��I am terrible
at doing magic,

but I always buy, like,

the little trick kits
and everything.

But I'm really terrible at it,

so I really appreciate people
that are very good at it.

You're obviously
very, very good at it.

I love the character
that you played.

It's, like, very posh
and proper but slightly horny.

I��I'm very into it.

� I love magic as well,
and you were super�duper funny

and everything in between.

I don't have any criticism

other than, like,
tighten it up, basically.

You know what I mean?

It could all have gone faster,
because it was a while

until we got to the actual
sword�in�the�card trick.

� Or maybe one more trick
in there.

� Yeah, something like that.
both: Yeah.

� But that's��
you were awesome.

You were wonderful.
� Thank you.

� Absolutely.

� One more time
for Mandy Muden!

� Way to go, Mandy.
Thank you.

Thank you.

� When she had that knife,
I'm thinking to myself,

"Okay, I'm trusting
that she's a pro."

� [sighs]
Well, I'm glad that's over.

But anyway, it's there.

I'm over.
[sighs]

Huge glass of wine now.

� I mean, it was really good,
but is it enough?

Like, we have
so many comics left.

We have so many more acts left.

Is it going to be enough?

� I guess we'll see.

.

� Welcome back
to "Bring the Funny."

� Whoo!

� You pumped?
� Dude, I feel ready.

I got your back, dude.
� I got your back.

� I love you, dude.
� I love you, dude.

� Dude, let's go
crush it, dude.

� Our next act is
the Captain & Tennille

of the digital age.

Give it up
for Regan & Watkins.

[cheers and applause]

� All right, Regan & Watkins.

Come on with it.

� [playing mellow tune]

� Man, I miss love songs, Pat.
� Tell me about it.

� That got me thinking.

What would a love song

about the 21st century girl
even sound like?

♪ ♪

both: ♪ She's got duck lips ♪

♪ Cell phones for hands ♪

♪ She's a 21st century girl
and I'm her man ♪

[laughter]

� What about 21st
century guys?

both:
♪ He can't change a tire ♪

♪ He Googled it ♪

♪ His greatest fear
in a relationship ♪

♪ Is to commit ♪

� ♪ Uh, hit it
with some sax now ♪

♪ ♪

both: ♪ I hit 'em
with the chorus ♪

♪ 21st century boys and girls ♪

♪ 21st century ♪

� ♪ We're gonna be
the end of the world ♪

� ♪ Girls and boys
and boys and girls ♪

� ♪ We're gonna be the end,
gonna, gonna be the end ♪

♪ Gonna, gonna be the end ♪

♪ Gonna, gonna be the end,
gonna, gonna be the end ♪

both: ♪ We're gonna be
the end of the world ♪

[cheers and applause]

[upbeat pop music]

♪ ♪

� All right, Kenan.

� Overall, I thought
it was great.

But my only negative,
I would say,

is that it's hard
to make everything clear

when you have music
as a distraction.

Sometimes the guitars, pianos,

they seem like crutches.

� I'm with Keenan.

When I saw you come out with
a guitar and a saxophone,

I can't say that I felt a
tingling in my nether regions.

Uh, but when you sing,

you have to be extra careful
sometimes to enunciate.

� Yeah.

� You have to understand
the words in order to laugh.

'Cause there were a couple
of times I lost the words,

and when I lose the words,
I lose the joke.

� Right.

� That being said, you guys
executed that very well.

Very good job.
� Thank you.

� I think you guys have
really good chemistry together.

I loved all the jokes.

Very relatable,
'cause that's me, literally.

I'm made of��
my hands are cell phones.

But, yeah, I don't know.

Music comedy
is so tough for me, um,

and not in the same way
that it's tough for you guys.

It's just not my style,
necessarily.

But you had
the entire audience clapping,

and I think they loved it,
so good job.

� One more
for Regan & Watkins, y'all.

� Good job,
Regan & Watkins.

[cheers and applause]

♪ ♪

Anybody that comes out of there
with an instrument,

I'm starting
to check�out immediately.

Like, "O�okay."

� But that's not fair
to them, though.

� It's not fair because this is
an overall comedy genre thing,

so it's like
I have to get past that,

but it's really hard.

� Okay.
♪ Yo, me and my girl ♪

♪ We getting ready ♪

Sorry, I'm just, like,
in my head because I'm worried

I'm not gonna breathe up there,
you know?

I'm so nervous.

� Y'all ready
for some more funny?

I said, "Are y'all ready
for some more funny?"

� Oh, yeah!

� This is Morgan Jay!

[cheers and applause]

♪ ♪

� 'Sup.

� And you know I hate
crutches.

� I know you do.

� Oh, guys.
What's going on?

My name is Morgan Jay.

I do music comedy,
which a lot of people know

is the most respected
of the comedy art forms.

[laughter]

And I'm gonna sing you guys
one song tonight.

This song is dedicated

to anybody
in a long�term relationship.

This is called "It's a Trap."

[laughter]

[playing mellow music]

Okay, yo.

♪ Me and my girl,
we getting ready ♪

♪ To go out to a dinner party ♪

♪ But now, I'm thinking maybe
we got time ♪

♪ To get a little naughty ♪

♪ So I gently put my hands
all up on her body ♪

♪ And she's like ♪

♪ Stop that, not right now ♪

Some of you already know
what it's about.

Okay.
♪ Can I ask you a question? ♪

♪ Yes, you can ♪

♪ Do you think
that I've put on some weight? ♪

♪ Oh, snap, what do I do? ♪

♪ What do I say? ♪

♪ If I'm wrong tonight
I'm gonna have to masturbate ♪

[laughter]

♪ But I'm ready ♪

♪ Now, Kenan ♪

♪ Can I ask you
a trap question, Kenan? ♪

♪ Kenan, how many people ♪

♪ Have you hooked up with
in your life? ♪

♪ You know what?
Don't answer that ♪

♪ But enjoy the conversation
with your boo�boo ♪

♪ After the show ♪

♪ 'Cause you already know
what's gonna happen ♪

♪ You're gonna be
with your girl ♪

♪ And she's gonna be like ♪
Oh, my God.

That guitar guy,
that was fun, wasn't it?

Oh, my God.

But, like, how many people?
Tell me, tell me.

No, no, I'm not gonna get mad.

Tell me.
Seriously, tell me.

Oh, my God.

♪ Now, Jeff ♪
� No.

♪ I'm not gonna let you
off the hook Jeff ♪

� [chuckles]

� ♪ You're married,
Jeff, right? ♪

� 33 years.
� ♪ 33? ♪

♪ Give it up for Jeff,
33 years ♪

[cheers and applause]

♪ Now, Jeff ♪

♪ I feel like
you got this answer ♪

♪ Does your wife look the same
as when you met her? ♪

� [laughs]

� Better.
� ♪ That's the right answer ♪

� Yes!
There you go! Yes!

� That's right.

♪ And if she asks you,
do I look fat? ♪

♪ Don't even answer that,
'cause it's a trap ♪

Thank you guys.

[cheers and applause]

[upbeat music]

� I thought that was great.
� Yeah.

� ♪ Maybe that's why
I'm still single ♪

[laughter]

♪ Kenan ♪
� ♪ Kenan ♪

� Hey, you know
what I'm saying?

It's music time.

Um, you're��
you're an amazing musician,

and you're also
very funny in between,

and that's exactly
what we're looking for

in this competition.

Because if you're gonna
step out

of just the stand�up,
you know, genre

and do something different,

then we want it
to still encompass funny.

Like, that's
the main goal here,

and the fact that you picked
a riff as opposed to a song

that you had
to stay dedicated to in time

so you could be reactive,

it goes to show you that you're
an amazing stand�up as well.

So those two worlds
collided brilliantly for me.

Great job.
� Thank you.

[cheers and applause]

� Okay, so first, Morgan,
I love the self�deprecating

when you say
that guitar comedians

are the most respected
of all the comedians.

[stammering]

[cheers and applause]

Comedians, we're a little bit
snobs about stuff,

and maybe
guitar�playing comedians

are not our favorite.

That being said, you, like,
have this little riff

like it's a real radio song.

And you're doing funny stuff

and you're having to react

because you don't know what
our answers are gonna be.

So...
� I did not know.

� I am telling you,
I loved you.

I thought you were fantastic.

Great job.

� Very good stuff.

� ♪ Oh, my God, thank you ♪

� I think it's way cooler

to make someone love
what you're doing

when they're not that into it
to begin with.

And you not knowing
their answers

and still being funny,
that's talent.

That's��that was really great.

� You keep bringing this
week after week,

you're gonna be around
this thing a long time.

� Thanks.

� ♪ Give it up
for Morgan Jay ♪

♪ Give it up for Morgan Jay ♪

� Good job, Morgan.

Yeah.

� Give it up!

� I really liked that guy.
� It was really good.

♪ ♪

� Well, I think
it went pretty well.

I think it went pretty well.

Luckily, Jeff got
the right answer.

� I wanna see
what else he's got.

� Thousand percent.

� But it's gonna be weird
when you put that up

against another music act.

� Oh, I can't wait
to put them up head to head.

� I know, I really��
� I can't��couldn't wait.

♪ ♪

.

[cheers and applause]

[upbeat pop music]

� Welcome back
to "Bring the Funny."

[cheers and applause]

Remember, only six acts
from tonight's lineup

can make it through
to the next round.

It's times like this
when I'm happy to be the host

so I can
do all this talking but...

[laughs] I ain't gotta do
what you gotta do.

� Yeah, right?

But I like having
the interaction with you

because you're a comic too.
Do you know what I mean?

� Jeff wanna do an interaction
with��with Amanda.

So, what's gonna happen...
[laughs]

Sorry, I just went
into a blind musician.

We're gonna do a nice pick�up.

This is gonna be great.
[laughs]

Pick it up from��pick it up
from the beginning

and then we'll do it
all together.

All of us together.

[cheers and applause]

� All right, let's say hello
to our final act.

♪ ♪

� Don't mess this up.

All right, here we go.

All right, this is for you,
Mom and Dad.

Let's do it.

� This next comedian
is a big family man

and a very funny individual.

Putting the "hey"
in "Jesus,"

it's Jesus Trejo!

� Jesus!

♪ ♪

Please be related
to Danny Trejo.

[cheers and applause]

� What's up, everybody?
How we doing?

� Good!

� Oh, it's good to be here.

Uh, I'm a only child.

If you ever wondered
what it's like

to be a only child
and have fun,

go to any bar,
look at that one drunk guy

sitting there by himself
looking down.

Every two minutes
you just hear him go...

[laughs]
"That's funny."

[laughter]

I wish I had more siblings,
you know?

It's like��like, my mom comes
from a big family.

My grandmother had 21 kids.

Wow, yeah.
By the same dad.

Double wow, you know?

They didn't have Netflix
back then.

It was all chill, you know?

Like, I just imagine
my grandmother

popping kids out like
tennis balls out the machine.

Just...
[imitating balls firing]

[laughter]

My grandpa was there
to catch them all.

Just, "I got one.
Go play."

[laughter]

How do you come up
with 21 names?

Think about that.

That's like coming up
with one email address

no one's taken yet.

It's like,
"What do you call this one?"

"I'm gonna call this one Jose."

"That one's taken."
"Okay."

[laughs]

"Okay, what about
Jose�smiley face�81?"

[laughter]

If you're gonna have
that many kids,

you gotta use it
to your advantage.

I know I would.

I'd have chores
around the house ready to go.

You're popping them out.
[imitates popping]

Here, do the dishes.

One more?
Help your brother over there.

Help your brother.

Need somebody
to turn off the TV.

[imitates pop]
Go, come on.

What's wrong, you can't reach?
Hold on, hold on.

[imitates pop]
Get on top, get on top.

[laughter and applause]

I asked my grandma, I said,
"What made you stop at 21?

"You could have kept going.

25, 30, who knows?"

She's like,
"Mijo, nobody hits on 21.

That's blackjack."

My name's Jesus Trejo.
Thank you guys.

[cheers and applause]

♪ ♪

� Congrats to all
of our audience members

who caught a baby.

[laughter]

Chrissy, did you catch one?
� I did.

Kaboom.
� There it is.

� I thought, um,
your sound effects��

you're amazing at that.

I always love that when it's
incorporated into a show.

It's great to always talk
about your family

and reference your family

because that's going to be
something personal to you,

and I wanna see more of that.

� Uh, yeah, I mean, I concur.

I thought you did a great job.

You're obviously a very
seasoned, awesome stand�up.

I feel like it was a lot

of the same sound effect
at times.

Keep that in mind.

Like, don't stay on one thing
that's working too long

because people can, you know,

get in front of it
a little bit.

It starts
to become predictable.

So let it be a hard hit
a couple times

and then get up off of it

and let us celebrate
something else of you.

� Appreciate it.
Thank you.

� Somebody told me one time,

if you think you're going
too slow, slow down.

Because if makes you confident,
you know what I'm saying?

It makes you in control.

You had so many good jokes,
and you just, you know��

you're popping on
to the next one.

So��but fabulous job.

Very, very funny.

� Y'all give it up
for Jesus Trejo.

[cheers and applause]

� Trejo!

♪ ♪

� Judges...

we have seen
all of tonight's acts,

but now it's time for you guys

to determine
which of these acts

are gonna go on
to the next round.

� We have to actually make
some difficult decisions.

� What do you
like better, folks?

[Meghan Trainor's
"Just Got Paid"]

� ♪ Don't know
where we're going ♪

♪ We go in when we go out ♪

� All right, the judges
have made their decisions.

� Whoo!
� Let's run them down.

Judges!

� Going on to the next round,
Morgan Jay.

[cheers and applause]

♪ ♪

� Michael Longfellow.

� ♪ I just got paid ♪

[cheers and applause]

� Willy Appelman.

� Yeah, Willy!

� ♪ I just got paid ♪

[no audible dialogue]

♪ Gimme that,
gimme that, gimme that ♪

� Jesus Trejo!

� ♪ I just got paid ♪

� ISMO, get out here!

� ♪ Gimme that,
gimme that, gimme that ♪

♪ I just got paid ♪

� Kenan, bring us home.

Who's the final act moving on
to the Comedy Clash?

� Randy Feltface.

♪ ♪

� [screams]

� [screams]
� He's right here!

� [Bleep].

� Give it up
for the six acts moving on

to the Comedy Clash!

[cheers and applause]

� Everybody loved this one.

Aww, yay!

� A big thank you
to our judges,

and give yourselves
a big round of applause.

You've been the best crowd
we've ever had.

I've been Amanda Seales.

Goodnight!
� Whoo!

� ♪ Gimme that,
gimme that, gimme that ♪

� Good job!
� ♪ I just got paid ♪

[cheers and applause]