Original subtitles

♪ Magic is real here

♪ Far away from home

♪ Anything can happen

♪ When witches make the rules

♪ Monsters are cool

♪ The moon is our friend

♪ I wanna stay with you

♪ On Summer Camp Island

♪♪

Oscar: I want to pick up my parcel

before doing anything else today.

But where's the UMPS office?

It could be anywhere!

Look, there's Lem. She's got a parcel.

Hey, Lem, where's UMPS today?

It's in the monsters' backyard, under the Everqueen tree.

-Thanks, Lem. -Okay, bye.

I love getting UMPS!

I wonder why the UMPS office is always changing location.

I think it's because the monsters get bored easily.

They like a change of scenery.

Yeah, I guess I'm kind of like that, too.

Look! There's the Everqueen tree.

My liege.

And there's the UMPS office.

"United Monster Parcel Service"

Together: Morning, Ava.Hi, honeys.

I got this parcel-delivery card at my cabin.

Cool!

[ Munches, gulps ]

Oh! Oscar! I have a parcel for you.

It's from my parents.

I think it might be my old camcorder.

I wonder what they were thinking when they sent this parcel.

Ava, is the psychic mailbox here today?

Right behind you.[ Wheel creaks ]

Hi, Psychic Mailbox.

Let's see, you put the parcel in the box,

raise the little flag, and here we go!

[ Screen whirs ]

Ooh, there's New Jersey!

That's our neighborhood.

Those are the numbers in my street address.

I found the video camera Oscar was asking for.

He's gonna make a nice, magical movie

like those stories he's always making up about summer camp.

You know, the big monsters, the little witches,

and -- and what else?

Oh! The talking trees!

All our friends say their kids are growing up so fast,

but we don't have to worry about that with Oscar.

He's going to be our little baby forever.

Oh, shush!

Okay, I'll send it out first thing in the morning.

[ Sighs ] They think I'm making up stories like a little baby.

Well, you know what -- Oh.[ Wheel creaks ]

Thanks, Psychic Mailbox.

I'm gonna make a documentary

about the most magical stuff on the island.

Then my parents will know I'm not making it up.

Yeah, great idea!

I'll start with a shot of Ava in the UMPS office.

This looks pretty good!

Mm, that could just be a guy in a suit.

Mm.

Mm!

I don't know what I'm doing.

Here, I've seen loads of documentaries.

I know what to do.

We have to start really close up

on something really strange.

Oscar: This is the on-fire ant.

Whew!

They're extremely useful if one runs out of matches.

On-fire ants on a log, and it's campfire time.

The predator of the on-fire ant is the on-fire anteater.

But too many may give them heartburn.

[ Stomach gurgles ]Ay.

Pass the ant-acid, would ya?

[ Sniffs ]

Ooh! Ooh! Hedgehog!

Now, this is the cotton mouth snake.

They have cotton balls for teeth,

so when they bite you...

[ Laughs ] ...it tickles!

Oh, uh, you're blocking the light, Hedgehog.

It's not me.

Oh! Hi, Mortimer. Hi, Blanche.

What are you guys doing?

We're making a documentary

about all the magical stuff on the island.

Ooh, I like documentaries. That's very impressive.

Hedgehog's directing, writing, editing, producing,

and I'm the host.

Hey, you guys know the island better than anyone.

What's the most magical creature?

-Hmm. -Hmm.

-The alicroc. -The alicroc.

It's your basic winged, uni-horned creature.

There's only about five in the world.

Loves newspapers, very hard to spot.

Why are they so hard to spot?

They keep to themselves. They don't like attention.

-Help us find him! -Help us find him!

Get the camera ready, Hedgehog.

Don't wanna miss the alicroc.

Oh, we're not gonna see one around here.

[ Chuckles ] We have to go way deeper.

Very rare, very hard to spot.

Tell us more about the magical creatures on the island.

Hyup!

You know, the cotton mouth snake

you were filming back there

is actually indigenous to New Jersey.

They're probably all extinct there by now, though.

But what would a magical creature

be doing in New Jersey?

There used to be lots of magical creatures in New Jersey.

Monsters are from New Jersey?

Sure.

Wow, that's so funny. I wonder why they --

Shh!

[ Bush rustling ]

♪♪

[ All gasp ]

Oscar: Are you getting it?

Hedgehog: Yeah, I'm getting it.

Wait! Wait! Don't get excited.

It's a fake.

It's just Howard trying to fool us.

[ Band snaps ]

-Ow! -What?!

Why you trying to fool us, Howard?

I wasn't trying to fool you.

I -- I'm going to a costume party.

Okay, but why were you in the bushes?

[ Stammers ]

I was going to the bathroom, okay?!

Howard likes going to the bathroom in the bushes!

Are you happy?!

[ Muttering ] Monster just wants

to go to the bathroom in the bushes.

It's not that big a deal.

Ugh.

[ Owl hooting ]

Hey, Mortimer, can you tell us more about the alicroc?

Sure. Let's see...

The first time I ever saw an alicroc

was over 100 years ago.

Mortimer: I was a freshman at Harvard University.

I had never been out of New Jersey...[ Door opens ]

...let alone seen an alicroc, and wouldn't you know it,

on my first day in earth science,

one sat right next to me!

I tried not to stare, but I had never seen an alicroc.

Neither had most of the class.

Even the professor was surprised to see an alicroc.

Hello, class, my name is -- Aah!

Uh... [ Clears throat ]

Oh. Uh, heh, heh, hello.

Hello to, uh, all of you students.

[ Teeth chattering ]Heh, heh.

Uh, yeah.

And [sighs] yeah.

He could tell everyone was looking,

and he got self-conscious.

He never came back to class again.

I used to bring him his homework.

[ Knock on door ]He would ask me

to slide it under the door.

You slid his homework under the door?

Yeah. Like this.

Hyup.

-Yeah, Mortimer! -Whoo! Go, Mortimer!

Whoo-hoo! Hey, Blanche,

did any alicrocs go to Wellesley?

I didn't go to Wellesley. I went to Radcliffe.

Like this!

-Rad! -Cliff!

[ Laughter ]

Shh! I think I heard a newspaper.

[ Newspaper rustles ]

♪♪

[ Gasps ]

This is amazing.

Oscar: Whoa, what's this?

-It's Susie. -Shh.

How's my little shy guy?

Got you a copy of News Jersey,

fresh off the presses.

Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

You know the rules, shy guy.

Payments up front.

What is happening?

♪♪

[ Whispering ] This is so weird.

Okay.

Pleasure doing business with you.

♪♪

Aw, he looks so happy.

-Aah! -Aah!

What are you dumb babies doing?

Hi, Susie.

Dumb babies. Doing. What are you?

We're making a documentary

about all the magic on the island.

Yeah, so I can send it to my parents

and prove I'm not making this stuff up

like a little baby.

What? Uh...

Oh, what a great idea.

Hey, you two should be in the movie.

Here, give me the camera.

And let me get a shot of you two

with the alicroc in the background, yeah.

Yeah, that's it.

Little farther back.

Mm, that's nice.

Little farther.

Mm, farther.

Stop right there.

Later, bozos. -Aah!

Sorry, babies. This is mine now.

Can't risk this getting home to your parents.

Camp P.R.

Come on!

Send to his parents?

Susie! Come back!

[ Breathing heavily ][ Door opens ]

[ Door slams ]

[ Wand taps on camcorder ]

Open, film canister!

I command you to open!

I don't think she knows how to work a camcorder.

Good. That'll give us some time

to figure out how to get it back.

But not much time.

I mean, it does say "Eject" on the side.

I have an idea.

Do you remember the on-fire ants? Yes.

And do you remember the cotton mouth snake?

Hmm. Yes, I do.

Open! Open!

What does "FF" mean? Why "FF"?

And why does it say "Japan"? Makes no sense.

Why would anyone want to own one of these stupid things?

Open, stupid thing!

[ Fire crackles ]

I loathe technology.

[ Smoke alarm beeping ]Aah!

Am I in a nightmare?!

♪♪

[ Laughing ]

♪♪

[ Beeping continues ]

Sleep! I put a spell on you.

Sleep!

[ Beeping stops ]

I hate beepy things.

[ Alarm beeps ]

And you're not getting the last word.

Now, what was I doing before I --

[ Clatter ]Hmph!

[ Laughs awkwardly ]

Oscar, what are you doing?

Would you believe me if I said snake-er-cise?

Hedgehog, now! Aah!

Oof!

[ Grunts ] Did you get it?

Yeah. I can send it to my parents

before the UMPS office closes.

It's a good thing I saved the wrapping paper

and I usually carry a little pencil

in my back pocket.

Oscar!

Don't close the office, Ava.

I've got an outgoing parcel!

Well, we're still good...

[ Grunts ] ...for the night deposit.

Yes!

You dumb little babies!

You have no idea what you've done!

Ooh! Who's a dumb little baby?

Who, who, who! Poo, poo, poo!

[ Groans ]

Hi, Mom. How's it going?

Have you been looking at any magical creatures lately?

Yeah, I took a painting class and I'm painting a phoenix.

Didn't you get my movie?

-Oh, no, not yet. -That's funny.

It should have gotten there by now.

I wonder what...

[ Dramatic music plays ]

Hey, Mom, I'll call you back.

[ Receiver clicks ]

So, are you guys pals with Susie now?

Not exactly.

People can't know that we're here

or that there's magic on the island.

Why not?

There used to be magical creatures everywhere.

But people changed the way they felt about magic,

and they thought monsters should be put in captivity.

So we fled to this island because it was a safe place,

and now much of the magic that's left in the world

is on this little island.

If any adults find out we're here...

You'd be in danger?

Yeah. The whole island would be in danger.

Whoa. I had no idea.

Well, the most important thing is to keep you guys safe.

And if my parents keep calling me

a little baby forever,

I can live with that.

Ava: Do you pinky-toe swear you won't tell about us?

I don't know if that's necessary.

You have to pinky-toe swear. It's the rules.

Well, if you feel that strongly about it.

[ Laughs ] Hey, you're wiggling your toes!

Yeah, we always wiggle our toes...

When we pinky-toe swear.[ Laughter ]

No, stop. That's not fair.

-Oh, that feels good. -Oh, that feels so good.

There's too many toes.

Stop tickling me. [ Laughs ]

♪♪

♪♪

Mm, I don't know what I'm doing.