All language subtitles for Diary.of.a.Wimpy.Kid.Dog.Days.2012.720p.BluRay.x264.anoXmous_eng
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0
00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:11,500
{\move(10,10,190,230,100,400)\fad(0,1000)\fscx25\fscy25\t(0,6000,\fscx125\fscy125)\c&H000000&\3c&H00FFFF&}anoXmous
1
00:00:12,501 --> 00:00:29,202
{\move(400,10,190,270,100,400)\fad(0,1000)\fscx25\fscy25\t(0,6000,\fscx125\fscy125)\c&H000000f&\3c&0000a6&}https://thepiratebay.se/user/anoXmous
1
00:00:39,123 --> 00:00:40,456
Want to grab that?
2
00:00:41,291 --> 00:00:45,128
I can't believe it's so crowded.
School isn't even out yet.
3
00:00:45,254 --> 00:00:46,546
Maybe we should come back.
4
00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:48,631
How about never?
That sound good?
5
00:00:48,924 --> 00:00:52,468
A family swim
is a great way to kick off the summer.
6
00:00:52,803 --> 00:00:55,638
Let's not forget, opening day is free!
7
00:01:02,604 --> 00:01:03,938
I hate going in there.
8
00:01:04,148 --> 00:01:06,774
Remember,
move fast and keep your eyes down.
9
00:01:10,654 --> 00:01:12,989
Sorry. Excuse me.
10
00:01:31,508 --> 00:01:32,675
Greg!
11
00:01:33,844 --> 00:01:37,638
I'm going to see if I can get a good spot.
Watch Manny.
12
00:01:38,140 --> 00:01:39,182
What? But...
13
00:01:41,018 --> 00:01:44,520
Manny?
14
00:02:08,921 --> 00:02:10,254
Manny, no!
15
00:02:10,589 --> 00:02:12,757
Washing my hands.
16
00:02:42,287 --> 00:02:43,454
No, no, no.
17
00:02:44,122 --> 00:02:46,457
But I'm so close to getting...
18
00:02:46,708 --> 00:02:50,878
Summertime is for real games,
not video games. Healthy stuff.
19
00:02:51,129 --> 00:02:53,965
Like, let's see...
20
00:02:55,217 --> 00:02:56,551
Swimming?
21
00:03:24,580 --> 00:03:26,998
Time to sell some C.D.'s.
22
00:03:31,753 --> 00:03:33,087
Are you kidding?
23
00:03:34,590 --> 00:03:37,258
Rodrick,
you can't play your music that loud.
24
00:03:37,509 --> 00:03:38,676
Lenwood?
25
00:03:39,261 --> 00:03:40,344
Is that Lenwood Heath?
26
00:03:40,596 --> 00:03:42,597
Mr. Heffley, it's good to see you.
27
00:03:44,600 --> 00:03:45,600
Mrs. Heffley.
28
00:03:46,351 --> 00:03:47,351
Hi.
29
00:03:47,936 --> 00:03:49,770
So... you've changed.
30
00:03:50,022 --> 00:03:52,690
I've been going to Spag Union Prep School.
31
00:03:52,725 --> 00:03:54,066
They really turned me around.
32
00:03:54,151 --> 00:03:56,944
You may remember
I was a bit of a troublemaker.
33
00:03:57,529 --> 00:03:58,696
Nah.
34
00:04:06,622 --> 00:04:09,206
You're cleaning all this up!
You hear me?
35
00:04:15,547 --> 00:04:18,382
So, Spag Union,
what grade does that start?
36
00:04:18,717 --> 00:04:19,800
Eighth grade, sir.
37
00:04:22,721 --> 00:04:24,472
You're going into the eighth grade.
38
00:04:26,391 --> 00:04:27,892
Cannonball!
39
00:04:28,226 --> 00:04:30,728
It's good to see you, sir. Ma'am.
40
00:04:32,064 --> 00:04:33,564
He called me "sir".
41
00:04:34,399 --> 00:04:37,735
He used to be so cool. Like me.
42
00:04:42,407 --> 00:04:43,741
Löded Diper.
43
00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:45,493
Bubby, over here!
44
00:04:45,744 --> 00:04:47,745
Greg, honey, go help your brother.
45
00:04:58,090 --> 00:04:59,173
What's so funny?
46
00:04:59,508 --> 00:05:01,008
I'm peeing!
47
00:05:50,225 --> 00:05:52,893
I have one more week of school,
then it's summer vacation.
48
00:05:53,103 --> 00:05:55,354
Which sounds great, but for me,
49
00:05:55,439 --> 00:05:58,065
summer vacation is basically
a three-month guilt trip.
50
00:05:58,075 --> 00:05:59,525
Just because the weather's nice,
51
00:05:59,609 --> 00:06:02,611
everyone expects you
to be out all day frolicking.
52
00:06:04,740 --> 00:06:08,075
But the truth is, I've always been
more of an indoor person.
53
00:06:08,285 --> 00:06:11,203
To me, the perfect way to spend
summer vacation
54
00:06:11,288 --> 00:06:13,289
is in front of the TV playing video games.
55
00:06:13,915 --> 00:06:18,419
Unfortunately, my dad's idea of a perfect
summer is the opposite of mine.
56
00:06:18,628 --> 00:06:22,465
The real problem is, me and my dad
have nothing in common.
57
00:06:22,758 --> 00:06:25,634
But as long as I stay
one step ahead of him...
58
00:06:27,596 --> 00:06:29,764
I think I have a shot at a fun summer.
59
00:06:36,646 --> 00:06:38,105
Last day of school!
60
00:06:38,315 --> 00:06:40,483
I know. It's kind of sad.
61
00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:42,985
Sad? Are you crazy?
62
00:06:43,111 --> 00:06:45,821
I'm going to play video games all summer.
It's going to be awesome.
63
00:06:46,656 --> 00:06:48,157
There's one person I will miss.
64
00:06:48,950 --> 00:06:49,992
Hey, guys!
65
00:06:50,160 --> 00:06:51,452
Hi, Holly!
66
00:06:52,329 --> 00:06:54,163
You'll see her when school starts again.
67
00:06:54,456 --> 00:06:57,833
In three months?
A lot can happen in three months.
68
00:06:58,502 --> 00:07:00,294
Hey, Holly. How was your summer?
69
00:07:00,504 --> 00:07:02,129
Great! I got married.
70
00:07:03,465 --> 00:07:05,800
You know my husband... Chirag.
71
00:07:06,009 --> 00:07:07,134
Hello, Gregory.
72
00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:10,679
Last period of the school year!
73
00:07:12,682 --> 00:07:15,476
But it is still a school day, so...
74
00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:17,978
open Discovering History to chapter 7.
75
00:07:18,355 --> 00:07:21,857
It's the last day of school.
Like anyone brought their books.
76
00:07:24,486 --> 00:07:26,028
Classic Greg Heffley.
77
00:07:26,196 --> 00:07:27,238
I pity him.
78
00:07:27,531 --> 00:07:29,490
Of course you're not prepared.
79
00:07:29,699 --> 00:07:34,537
Mr. Draybick, I'd be honored
to share my book with Greg Heffley.
80
00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:45,297
Fregley claims to wear a special cologne,
but everyone knows he just never washes.
81
00:07:48,885 --> 00:07:50,469
That's great!
82
00:08:09,739 --> 00:08:10,906
Rowley.
83
00:08:11,908 --> 00:08:14,577
I need to make a connection
with Holly this summer.
84
00:08:14,911 --> 00:08:16,579
I'm tired of being...
85
00:08:17,372 --> 00:08:18,372
"friends".
86
00:08:19,082 --> 00:08:22,418
What's wrong with being "friends"?
We're friends.
87
00:08:23,712 --> 00:08:25,546
I'll get her to sign my yearbook.
88
00:08:26,047 --> 00:08:27,715
She signs lots of yearbooks.
89
00:08:27,924 --> 00:08:31,427
But when she signs mine, I'll ask her
to write her phone number, too.
90
00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:32,761
Okay!
91
00:08:33,388 --> 00:08:35,055
The rest of the class is free time.
92
00:08:35,265 --> 00:08:36,599
Enjoy.
93
00:08:44,441 --> 00:08:47,776
Hey, Holly.
What are you doing this summer?
94
00:08:48,069 --> 00:08:49,737
Just regular summer stuff.
95
00:08:49,946 --> 00:08:53,574
Volunteering at the shelter,
building with Habitat for Humanity...
96
00:08:53,783 --> 00:08:56,285
and giving tennis
lessons to little kids.
97
00:08:56,786 --> 00:08:57,786
What about you?
98
00:08:58,246 --> 00:09:01,081
He's going to get to the end
of Twisted Wizard 2 this summer!
99
00:09:03,585 --> 00:09:07,087
If I have time
because of all the other stuff I'm doing.
100
00:09:07,964 --> 00:09:10,466
Hey, can I sign your yearbook?
101
00:09:11,593 --> 00:09:14,170
Yeah, sure.
You're only in seventh grade once.
102
00:09:14,304 --> 00:09:15,988
That's not always true, by the way.
103
00:09:16,072 --> 00:09:19,808
I think Andy Spitz
has been in seventh grade for four years.
104
00:09:21,811 --> 00:09:26,148
And... why don't you write down
your phone number, too?
105
00:09:26,441 --> 00:09:27,441
Okay.
106
00:09:28,276 --> 00:09:29,610
Let's go!
107
00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:31,654
Bye!
108
00:09:40,497 --> 00:09:41,830
No!
109
00:10:03,019 --> 00:10:04,144
Gregory!
110
00:10:04,688 --> 00:10:07,189
Help me! Help me!
111
00:10:23,665 --> 00:10:25,207
Would you sign my yearbook?
112
00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:26,667
Of course!
113
00:10:31,715 --> 00:10:33,716
Holly, you didn't finish writing...
114
00:10:34,009 --> 00:10:35,843
Isn't that your brother?
115
00:10:36,052 --> 00:10:39,555
Löded Diper's coming to rock
a town near you!
116
00:10:40,724 --> 00:10:44,727
You're getting your yearbooks signed?
That is so cute.
117
00:10:51,693 --> 00:10:52,693
What the heck?
118
00:10:54,738 --> 00:10:56,655
Honey, Greg was sick on picture day.
119
00:10:56,740 --> 00:10:58,907
Did you send in a photo of him
for the yearbook?
120
00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:01,368
Yeah! I remembered!
121
00:11:09,252 --> 00:11:10,753
That's Heather Hills.
122
00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:12,204
Get in.
123
00:11:12,289 --> 00:11:14,256
But I need to finish
signing Greg's yearbook.
124
00:11:14,758 --> 00:11:16,216
News flash. I don't care.
125
00:11:17,427 --> 00:11:18,761
Sorry.
126
00:11:19,220 --> 00:11:20,387
But you didn't...
127
00:11:20,764 --> 00:11:22,431
So... Heather.
128
00:11:23,058 --> 00:11:25,559
I'm going on a world tour with my band.
129
00:11:25,935 --> 00:11:29,104
If you're around,
I could comp you chicks some tickets.
130
00:11:29,397 --> 00:11:31,565
- Let's go.
- Wait! Holly!
131
00:11:36,738 --> 00:11:40,240
She was trying to act cool,
but I know she was into me.
132
00:11:40,784 --> 00:11:44,286
"Rowley, you are so cute."
Cute's underlined three times!
133
00:11:44,579 --> 00:11:49,249
"Stay cool. XOXO, Holly."
What did she write in yours?
134
00:11:51,461 --> 00:11:55,297
"Have a great summer.
You're such a good... friend."
135
00:11:57,300 --> 00:11:58,425
"Friend"?
136
00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:01,136
Oh, man!
137
00:12:01,971 --> 00:12:05,099
That's the kiss of death. "Friend".
That sucks!
138
00:12:05,767 --> 00:12:09,812
Despite Rodrick's negative attitude,
I have very clear goals for the summer.
139
00:12:10,146 --> 00:12:13,315
One, play video games.
Two, get together with Holly.
140
00:12:13,650 --> 00:12:15,651
Or three, both at the same time.
141
00:12:15,944 --> 00:12:17,778
Greg, you're an amazing gamer.
142
00:12:17,987 --> 00:12:19,446
I know.
143
00:12:19,781 --> 00:12:23,617
Our neighbors, the Warrens, have kids
that are the outdoorsy type.
144
00:12:23,827 --> 00:12:25,160
That's okay, but...
145
00:12:25,453 --> 00:12:28,831
my dad has this crazy idea
that physical exercise is normal.
146
00:12:29,124 --> 00:12:31,667
Those guys are setting a bad example.
147
00:12:33,128 --> 00:12:36,672
My dad has his eye on me,
so the key to a successful summer...
148
00:12:36,965 --> 00:12:39,133
will be to stay one move ahead.
149
00:12:40,802 --> 00:12:43,846
Those Warren boys
are already up, raring to go.
150
00:12:44,180 --> 00:12:47,182
Our boys probably
won't even get up till noon.
151
00:12:47,809 --> 00:12:50,477
I'm sorry. Did you say something?
152
00:12:51,813 --> 00:12:52,980
What are you doing up?
153
00:12:53,523 --> 00:12:57,526
It's the first day of vacation.
Did you think I'd just lie around all day?
154
00:12:57,861 --> 00:13:01,196
Actually, that's exactly what I thought.
155
00:13:01,489 --> 00:13:02,823
I can't find Manny's Tingy.
156
00:13:04,367 --> 00:13:06,869
You know, it's probably time...
157
00:13:07,162 --> 00:13:10,497
for him to move on
from that ratty old blanket anyway.
158
00:13:10,707 --> 00:13:12,916
Manny was given Tingy
right after he was born.
159
00:13:13,042 --> 00:13:15,377
Back then, Tingy was a fluffy blue blanket.
160
00:13:15,712 --> 00:13:20,048
But now, it's a couple of pieces of yarn
held together with raisins and boogers.
161
00:13:20,341 --> 00:13:22,176
You don't think he cares anymore?
162
00:13:23,386 --> 00:13:25,721
I'm sure it'll turn up.
163
00:13:27,849 --> 00:13:28,849
What?
164
00:13:29,225 --> 00:13:30,893
Look at this garbage.
165
00:13:31,186 --> 00:13:33,854
My dad and I don't agree on anything,
except for...
166
00:13:34,063 --> 00:13:38,066
the comic Li'l Cutie. We both hate it.
But we can't stop reading it!
167
00:13:38,401 --> 00:13:42,404
You're my BFF... Best Father Forever!
168
00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:44,406
- It's not even a joke!
- I know.
169
00:13:44,699 --> 00:13:48,410
Can we please focus?
We need to find Manny's Tingy.
170
00:13:49,579 --> 00:13:51,413
I'm going to be late for work.
171
00:13:52,415 --> 00:13:53,749
See you!
172
00:14:05,762 --> 00:14:07,429
Vacation is on!
173
00:14:31,454 --> 00:14:31,954
Greg.
174
00:14:38,253 --> 00:14:41,755
Are you really going to sit inside
all day and play video games?
175
00:15:36,352 --> 00:15:37,352
Hey, Dad.
176
00:15:37,604 --> 00:15:39,271
Are you... sweating?
177
00:15:39,689 --> 00:15:43,692
Yeah, I just finished up
some sports... playing.
178
00:15:45,695 --> 00:15:47,029
How was your day?
179
00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:50,449
Horrible! Manny still hasn't recovered
from losing Tingy.
180
00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:55,287
Well, maybe it's for the best.
I think he should really move on.
181
00:15:55,872 --> 00:15:57,205
Tingy!
182
00:15:58,207 --> 00:16:01,376
Tingy! Oh, my gosh, honey,
you found your blanket!
183
00:16:01,711 --> 00:16:04,212
This is great, but how
did it end up in the...
184
00:16:04,547 --> 00:16:06,548
- Garbage?
- Frank?
185
00:16:07,216 --> 00:16:08,216
Yeah?
186
00:16:08,426 --> 00:16:09,426
You didn't.
187
00:16:09,802 --> 00:16:10,969
I didn't...
188
00:16:11,554 --> 00:16:12,721
know...
189
00:16:13,389 --> 00:16:17,225
that it meant that much to him anymore.
190
00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:19,561
How could you?
191
00:16:25,318 --> 00:16:26,985
- Good morning.
- Morning!
192
00:16:30,698 --> 00:16:33,950
Congratulations, player,
all your hard work has paid off.
193
00:16:34,285 --> 00:16:37,120
You're now a Level Nine Necromancer!
194
00:16:38,623 --> 00:16:40,707
You played video games all day.
195
00:16:40,958 --> 00:16:42,125
Me?
196
00:16:43,127 --> 00:16:46,129
No. I've been playing sports.
197
00:16:46,798 --> 00:16:50,634
That's it! No more video games
for the rest of the summer!
198
00:16:51,135 --> 00:16:52,219
You can't do that!
199
00:16:52,387 --> 00:16:55,055
Oh, yeah, I can! I will! I am!
200
00:16:55,306 --> 00:16:57,474
I'm unplugging it!
201
00:16:57,725 --> 00:17:00,310
Does the DVD or the cable box go into...
202
00:17:00,561 --> 00:17:02,979
Does the DVD player go into the cable...
203
00:17:03,231 --> 00:17:04,981
You think this is funny?
204
00:17:05,233 --> 00:17:06,733
It's amusing.
205
00:17:07,985 --> 00:17:10,821
Well, then how about no video games and...
206
00:17:11,072 --> 00:17:14,908
no television for the rest of the
summer? Does that make you laugh?
207
00:17:14,992 --> 00:17:16,118
Dad, no!
208
00:17:16,244 --> 00:17:17,911
I stopped laughing!
209
00:17:22,667 --> 00:17:26,336
Guess who's the laugher now?
Me! I'm the laugher!
210
00:17:26,587 --> 00:17:29,923
I'm the laughingest laugher
that ever laughed!
211
00:17:34,011 --> 00:17:35,345
Funny stuff!
212
00:17:37,348 --> 00:17:39,683
I'm going to work on my battle diorama.
213
00:17:39,934 --> 00:17:40,934
Frank!
214
00:17:41,853 --> 00:17:45,272
What are you doing? First Tingy,
and now Greg's video games?
215
00:17:45,523 --> 00:17:47,441
General Lee isn't going to paint himself.
216
00:17:48,860 --> 00:17:50,110
This is important.
217
00:17:50,194 --> 00:17:53,864
You can't take away everything
they love and disappear downstairs.
218
00:17:54,198 --> 00:17:57,117
You need to get to Greg's level
and really engage with him.
219
00:17:57,952 --> 00:18:00,287
Find an activity you both enjoy.
220
00:18:01,539 --> 00:18:05,125
What are we going to do,
play Twisted Warlock all day?
221
00:18:05,376 --> 00:18:08,712
I hate to say it, but we have absolutely
nothing in common.
222
00:18:09,046 --> 00:18:11,131
What Greg needs is a role model.
223
00:18:11,382 --> 00:18:14,885
Someone he can look up to.
Sit down and talk with him.
224
00:18:15,136 --> 00:18:17,387
I do, but he doesn't listen to me.
225
00:18:17,638 --> 00:18:20,974
Trust me, hanging out together
is no fun for either of us.
226
00:18:23,060 --> 00:18:25,937
You always complain that your father
never spent enough time with you
227
00:18:26,022 --> 00:18:27,314
when you were young.
228
00:18:29,066 --> 00:18:31,234
Now you're doing the same thing.
229
00:18:33,571 --> 00:18:36,239
Be the father you wish
your father had been.
230
00:18:40,828 --> 00:18:42,162
You're right.
231
00:18:45,583 --> 00:18:47,584
I should put in more time.
232
00:18:48,920 --> 00:18:50,921
That didn't sound good.
233
00:18:52,757 --> 00:18:55,258
Rise and shine!
234
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:57,427
It's Saturday!
235
00:18:57,929 --> 00:19:00,096
We get to spend the whole day together!
236
00:19:07,021 --> 00:19:08,355
You know...
237
00:19:09,273 --> 00:19:12,275
it takes a while to get here
and it's an effort to get the boat out...
238
00:19:13,110 --> 00:19:14,611
but this is what it's all about.
239
00:19:14,862 --> 00:19:17,364
You and me,
spending quality time together.
240
00:19:19,283 --> 00:19:21,368
Okay, buddy, hand me some bait.
241
00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:36,967
Well...
242
00:19:38,219 --> 00:19:40,220
we should think about getting back.
243
00:19:45,142 --> 00:19:46,810
As bad as this was...
244
00:19:47,061 --> 00:19:50,730
Mom's idea of a good summer activity
was even worse.
245
00:19:50,982 --> 00:19:52,482
I'm so glad...
246
00:19:52,733 --> 00:19:57,153
you all decided to become founding
members of the Reading Is Fun Club!
247
00:19:57,655 --> 00:19:58,655
So...
248
00:19:58,990 --> 00:20:00,740
let's share the books you brought.
249
00:20:06,622 --> 00:20:09,124
I'm not so sure these
qualify as literature.
250
00:20:09,333 --> 00:20:12,335
How about I get some real books?
Classics.
251
00:20:13,004 --> 00:20:14,671
Something to stimulate your minds.
252
00:20:16,090 --> 00:20:17,674
I'll be right back!
253
00:20:19,176 --> 00:20:23,138
Thank you so much, Gregory,
for making the summer a time...
254
00:20:23,306 --> 00:20:24,973
to study and write book reports.
255
00:20:25,308 --> 00:20:28,543
You think I want to do this?
My summer's turned into a nightmare.
256
00:20:28,611 --> 00:20:30,478
You should come with me
to the country club!
257
00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:33,815
It's really fun
and you get to be outside all day.
258
00:20:36,027 --> 00:20:37,694
Ta-da!
259
00:20:39,697 --> 00:20:41,781
Let's get this party started!
260
00:20:44,785 --> 00:20:48,371
What do I do? I want to call Holly,
but the number's no good.
261
00:20:48,623 --> 00:20:50,457
Only the last two numbers are missing.
262
00:20:50,708 --> 00:20:54,210
That means there's only
100 different numbers it could be.
263
00:20:54,378 --> 00:20:55,712
I've got it!
264
00:20:56,130 --> 00:20:59,716
I'll call every number
it could be until I get the right one.
265
00:21:05,556 --> 00:21:07,724
Hello? Freggers speaking.
266
00:21:12,813 --> 00:21:14,314
Hello? Pickup or delivery?
267
00:21:14,815 --> 00:21:15,815
This is Brad.
268
00:21:25,326 --> 00:21:26,660
This is the coach.
269
00:21:26,911 --> 00:21:28,578
Coach Malone?
270
00:21:28,829 --> 00:21:29,829
Who is this?
271
00:21:30,081 --> 00:21:31,665
Don't tell him, Greg.
272
00:21:31,916 --> 00:21:33,583
Greg? Greg who?
273
00:21:34,001 --> 00:21:36,836
Okay, listen up, "Greg".
I don't know who you are...
274
00:21:37,088 --> 00:21:39,339
but if you call again,
I'll reach through the phone...
275
00:21:40,424 --> 00:21:44,010
So far, this is shaping up
to be the worst summer ever.
276
00:21:50,851 --> 00:21:53,853
Come on!
We'll be late for the Battle of Phillipi!
277
00:21:58,609 --> 00:22:01,528
Dad's really into Civil War reenactments,
which are basically...
278
00:22:01,779 --> 00:22:06,282
a bunch of grown men dressed
as soldiers running around in muddy fields.
279
00:22:06,534 --> 00:22:10,203
I didn't get to carry a gun.
I had the honor of being bugle boy.
280
00:22:10,454 --> 00:22:15,125
We re-enactors pride ourselves
on being completely authentic.
281
00:22:15,543 --> 00:22:16,710
Ronnie...
282
00:22:17,294 --> 00:22:19,629
carved his own buttons
out of black rubber.
283
00:22:20,464 --> 00:22:25,301
And Artie... his underwear,
made out of horsehair.
284
00:22:28,472 --> 00:22:29,973
What are you doing?
285
00:22:30,641 --> 00:22:32,642
It's spring, 1861!
286
00:22:32,977 --> 00:22:37,981
We're trying to outflank Porterfield's
armies! There's no video games! Come on!
287
00:22:39,150 --> 00:22:40,150
Okay, okay.
288
00:22:40,401 --> 00:22:43,153
All right. Now, the deciding factor...
289
00:22:43,487 --> 00:22:48,491
the reason we win this battle...
is we hold the element of surprise.
290
00:22:53,330 --> 00:22:55,999
No, we need the element of surprise!
291
00:22:56,333 --> 00:22:59,002
- That kid ruined everything!
- Let's get him!
292
00:23:01,756 --> 00:23:03,423
Where are you going?
293
00:23:03,841 --> 00:23:05,759
It's a reenactment! We won!
294
00:23:31,452 --> 00:23:33,953
Hey, Greg.
I can't make it to the book club.
295
00:23:34,205 --> 00:23:37,040
My mom's taking me to the country club.
She said I could invite you.
296
00:23:37,291 --> 00:23:38,625
No, thanks.
297
00:23:38,876 --> 00:23:42,212
Let's crack open Little Women
and see what's up with the girls.
298
00:23:44,548 --> 00:23:46,049
I'll be right over!
299
00:23:50,304 --> 00:23:51,971
We're going to have so much fun!
300
00:23:52,223 --> 00:23:53,556
If you say so.
301
00:23:55,351 --> 00:23:56,392
Up!
302
00:23:56,727 --> 00:23:58,645
Up! Up!
303
00:24:03,234 --> 00:24:05,235
Up! Come on!
304
00:24:05,736 --> 00:24:07,737
Davey, you call that a push-up?
305
00:24:21,919 --> 00:24:24,254
- Hello, Mrs. Jefferson.
- Hi, Amy.
306
00:24:24,755 --> 00:24:25,839
Crowded today?
307
00:24:26,090 --> 00:24:28,174
The nice weather really brought people out.
308
00:24:31,095 --> 00:24:33,930
Wow! Amy wasn't kidding!
309
00:24:34,265 --> 00:24:36,266
It is crowded today.
310
00:24:39,937 --> 00:24:41,771
This is crowded?
311
00:24:46,944 --> 00:24:48,778
Care for a smoothie?
312
00:24:49,113 --> 00:24:51,948
- They bring stuff to you?
- Yes, they do.
313
00:25:01,709 --> 00:25:03,042
Sorry!
314
00:25:03,294 --> 00:25:05,628
I guess I do like being outside...
315
00:25:06,130 --> 00:25:08,131
when I'm outside at a country club.
316
00:25:10,050 --> 00:25:12,218
- It's Holly Hills!
- She's always here.
317
00:25:12,469 --> 00:25:13,803
She's a member.
318
00:25:15,055 --> 00:25:17,807
And you didn't think maybe
you should tell me that?
319
00:25:18,726 --> 00:25:21,811
Now it's step... swing... catch it up high.
320
00:25:24,815 --> 00:25:27,817
Bye! And remember,
work on your forehand.
321
00:25:29,820 --> 00:25:31,988
- Hey, Holly.
- Hey, guys!
322
00:25:32,323 --> 00:25:34,616
I thought you were going to call me.
323
00:25:34,825 --> 00:25:38,161
I was going to,
but... then I realized I'd see you here.
324
00:25:38,454 --> 00:25:40,121
So, what are you up to?
325
00:25:40,331 --> 00:25:44,000
I'm helping the tennis coach.
I give lessons to little kids.
326
00:25:44,835 --> 00:25:47,128
That's so weird. We're all about tennis!
327
00:25:47,796 --> 00:25:49,839
Cool! We should play sometime.
328
00:25:50,132 --> 00:25:52,133
Actually, I've never played...
329
00:25:52,343 --> 00:25:53,843
We'd love to play!
330
00:25:54,511 --> 00:25:56,137
What about tomorrow at eleven?
331
00:25:56,347 --> 00:25:58,014
Eleven's perfect.
332
00:25:58,349 --> 00:26:01,017
- See you tomorrow!
- Tomorrow it is!
333
00:26:02,686 --> 00:26:05,146
And that's how you improve your summer.
334
00:26:10,194 --> 00:26:11,361
No, no.
335
00:26:11,695 --> 00:26:14,864
More. More. Oh, come on, Manny!
336
00:26:15,157 --> 00:26:16,282
Hi, Mom.
337
00:26:16,367 --> 00:26:19,202
Wow.
Somebody looks like they actually had fun.
338
00:26:19,328 --> 00:26:20,328
Hello!
339
00:26:20,663 --> 00:26:21,663
Hello.
340
00:26:22,206 --> 00:26:24,207
- Just the guy I'm looking for.
- Me?
341
00:26:24,500 --> 00:26:27,835
My office is offering a summer internship.
342
00:26:28,045 --> 00:26:29,712
And I signed you up for it!
343
00:26:30,047 --> 00:26:32,715
- What's an internship?
- Well...
344
00:26:33,008 --> 00:26:35,843
You'll come to my office every day...
345
00:26:36,053 --> 00:26:39,389
but you'll have your own
responsibilities. It's like a job.
346
00:26:39,682 --> 00:26:41,349
- Do I get paid?
- No.
347
00:26:41,558 --> 00:26:43,393
You got me a non-paying job?
348
00:26:43,727 --> 00:26:45,728
You can be work buddies!
349
00:26:51,193 --> 00:26:52,360
How long till we go home?
350
00:26:53,070 --> 00:26:55,196
We got here eight minutes ago!
351
00:27:00,077 --> 00:27:02,245
It sounds really great, but...
352
00:27:03,580 --> 00:27:05,581
This is awkward.
353
00:27:05,874 --> 00:27:08,209
It's just that... I already got a job.
354
00:27:08,419 --> 00:27:10,086
What? You got a job?
355
00:27:10,379 --> 00:27:12,880
Yeah!
Rowley invited me to the country club...
356
00:27:13,090 --> 00:27:15,591
and I saw a "Help Wanted" sign.
357
00:27:15,884 --> 00:27:18,386
I went to the manager and he hired me.
358
00:27:19,096 --> 00:27:21,264
He said he liked my pluck.
359
00:27:22,099 --> 00:27:23,266
Wait.
360
00:27:23,600 --> 00:27:25,435
You actually got a job?
361
00:27:25,769 --> 00:27:29,439
Yeah. But I can call and tell him
I can't if you want me...
362
00:27:29,732 --> 00:27:33,276
No, no! That's fantastic!
Can you believe it, Susan?
363
00:27:33,944 --> 00:27:36,779
- Our son got himself a job!
- I know.
364
00:27:40,409 --> 00:27:43,578
Somebody around here
actually did something.
365
00:27:46,623 --> 00:27:48,124
It's great!
366
00:28:15,319 --> 00:28:18,654
I think we should tell her
we've never played tennis.
367
00:28:18,989 --> 00:28:21,949
We played Ultimate Tennis
on the Wii, it's the same thing.
368
00:28:22,951 --> 00:28:23,951
Hi, guys.
369
00:28:24,161 --> 00:28:25,286
Hi, Holly!
370
00:28:25,496 --> 00:28:26,662
Jinx!
371
00:28:32,795 --> 00:28:35,296
Oh, no. What is she doing here?
372
00:28:35,964 --> 00:28:38,591
- Should we start with a rally?
- What's that?
373
00:28:38,926 --> 00:28:41,677
Oh, Rowley. Can you ever be serious?
374
00:28:42,054 --> 00:28:43,471
They'll let anyone in this place.
375
00:28:43,889 --> 00:28:45,223
That must be why you're here.
376
00:28:46,683 --> 00:28:49,852
Let's play doubles.
Patty and me versus you two.
377
00:28:50,104 --> 00:28:51,187
Okay.
378
00:28:53,190 --> 00:28:54,190
I'm gonna kill you!
379
00:29:06,370 --> 00:29:07,703
Sorry.
380
00:29:08,372 --> 00:29:10,039
Fifteen, love.
381
00:29:12,292 --> 00:29:13,292
What'd she call me?
382
00:29:15,879 --> 00:29:16,879
Yes!
383
00:29:17,548 --> 00:29:18,965
I mean, oops.
384
00:29:19,716 --> 00:29:21,384
Thirty, love.
385
00:29:21,718 --> 00:29:24,053
Whatever you say... love!
386
00:29:24,888 --> 00:29:26,055
What?
387
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:28,224
He's a weirdo.
388
00:30:02,759 --> 00:30:04,760
I got it! I got it!
389
00:30:13,270 --> 00:30:16,772
Have either of you
actually played tennis before?
390
00:30:17,107 --> 00:30:19,525
Yeah... Ultimate Tennis on the Wii.
391
00:30:21,111 --> 00:30:22,945
It's not exactly the same thing.
392
00:30:23,947 --> 00:30:25,698
I could give you a few pointers.
393
00:30:31,288 --> 00:30:34,123
You have to follow through. Like this.
394
00:30:40,547 --> 00:30:43,049
- We have to go. It's an emergency.
- A mega-emergency.
395
00:30:43,300 --> 00:30:46,469
The printer messed up the invitations
for my Sweet Sixteen.
396
00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:48,721
What does that have to do with me?
397
00:30:49,723 --> 00:30:53,392
People have expectations.
Everything has to be perfect!
398
00:30:54,228 --> 00:30:56,979
You'll never understand
what it's like to be pretty.
399
00:30:58,315 --> 00:30:59,982
Can you drive me home later?
400
00:31:00,234 --> 00:31:02,693
Come back for you? No.
It's like ten minutes away!
401
00:31:02,778 --> 00:31:04,529
Now move it or lose it.
402
00:31:07,491 --> 00:31:08,658
Wow!
403
00:31:08,992 --> 00:31:10,326
I know, right?
404
00:31:11,161 --> 00:31:12,828
I'll see you guys later!
405
00:31:14,873 --> 00:31:15,873
Bye!
406
00:31:16,583 --> 00:31:19,085
Not bad for the first day of my fake job.
407
00:31:19,336 --> 00:31:22,004
Plus, now Dad and I
are both "working men"...
408
00:31:22,589 --> 00:31:23,923
we get along great.
409
00:31:24,091 --> 00:31:25,841
Happy Fourth of July!
410
00:31:28,428 --> 00:31:32,098
"Li'l Cutie cartoonist
to retire in three months"!
411
00:31:32,432 --> 00:31:34,267
We won't have to read
that garbage anymore!
412
00:31:34,351 --> 00:31:36,352
Good riddance!
413
00:31:36,687 --> 00:31:37,853
Every Fourth of July,
414
00:31:37,938 --> 00:31:41,357
our neighbors, the Warrens,
throw a big party for the whole block.
415
00:31:41,692 --> 00:31:44,694
Mom and Dad make us all go.
Which is bad...
416
00:31:45,028 --> 00:31:48,197
because I've been avoiding
Rodrick's built-in lie detector.
417
00:31:48,448 --> 00:31:49,448
Hey, worker bee.
418
00:31:49,700 --> 00:31:53,202
You know, you having a job
doesn't pass the smell test.
419
00:31:53,537 --> 00:31:55,288
Yes, it does. It totally does!
420
00:31:59,710 --> 00:32:01,877
- Here, sweetie.
- Thanks.
421
00:32:06,049 --> 00:32:11,053
With my boys, it's go, go, go!
I have to wrestle them in every night.
422
00:32:11,555 --> 00:32:13,222
Same with my boys.
423
00:32:13,515 --> 00:32:16,851
They're in my Wilderness Explorers
troop now. They love it!
424
00:32:17,060 --> 00:32:19,895
I loved being in the Wilderness Explorers.
425
00:32:20,522 --> 00:32:22,231
- You did?
- Yeah. Loved it.
426
00:32:22,524 --> 00:32:26,235
That one camping trip we took as kids,
you cried the whole time.
427
00:32:27,070 --> 00:32:30,072
Well, I broke my arm in two places.
428
00:32:31,199 --> 00:32:32,241
Cried the whole time.
429
00:32:32,534 --> 00:32:33,534
Yeah, I...
430
00:32:34,244 --> 00:32:35,411
It hurt.
431
00:32:35,746 --> 00:32:39,248
You know what?
You should join the Wilderness Explorers.
432
00:32:39,875 --> 00:32:41,584
I'm more of an indoor person.
433
00:32:41,877 --> 00:32:43,210
Exactly. When's the next meeting?
434
00:32:43,420 --> 00:32:45,463
The waiting list for our troop
is a mile long.
435
00:32:45,547 --> 00:32:47,757
Everybody wants to join
the best of the best.
436
00:32:49,259 --> 00:32:51,927
Is that your dog? We grew up with a dog.
437
00:32:52,262 --> 00:32:54,263
Nutty. Frank named him.
438
00:32:54,556 --> 00:32:56,849
You can never be too young
to learn responsibility.
439
00:32:56,933 --> 00:32:58,601
You should get your boys a dog.
440
00:32:59,603 --> 00:33:01,604
Yeah. That's a great idea.
441
00:33:06,234 --> 00:33:09,111
I think I'll speak to Dad
about my suspicions.
442
00:33:09,780 --> 00:33:11,238
Do whatever you want.
443
00:33:12,949 --> 00:33:14,283
I will.
444
00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:18,454
Okay! Okay!
445
00:33:20,582 --> 00:33:22,416
I don't really have a job.
446
00:33:22,751 --> 00:33:23,834
Holly Hills is a member,
447
00:33:23,919 --> 00:33:26,087
if I'm at the country club,
I can hang out with her.
448
00:33:26,254 --> 00:33:27,588
I knew it.
449
00:33:29,966 --> 00:33:31,425
So is Heather Hills there, too?
450
00:33:32,469 --> 00:33:34,136
- Heather who?
- I want in.
451
00:33:34,971 --> 00:33:37,431
I can't get you in there.
I go as Rowley's guest.
452
00:33:37,641 --> 00:33:39,266
I'll go as your guest.
453
00:33:39,476 --> 00:33:42,937
I can't bring the guest. I am the guest.
There's no guest for the guest.
454
00:33:45,607 --> 00:33:47,375
Things are getting complicated.
455
00:33:47,459 --> 00:33:49,819
But at least something good
came out of the barbecue.
456
00:33:50,112 --> 00:33:51,112
Introducing...
457
00:33:51,822 --> 00:33:54,490
the new member of the Heffley family!
458
00:33:57,327 --> 00:33:58,994
Oh, Frank.
459
00:33:59,287 --> 00:34:01,122
I wish you'd checked with me first.
460
00:34:01,665 --> 00:34:04,291
I think this is more of a family decision.
461
00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:07,294
- Who's a good puppy?
- We can call him Shredder!
462
00:34:07,504 --> 00:34:09,672
- No.
- Ripjaw?
463
00:34:10,006 --> 00:34:12,007
We can call him Sweetie.
464
00:34:12,509 --> 00:34:13,509
Sweetie!
465
00:34:13,969 --> 00:34:15,636
Sweetie, that's a great name!
466
00:34:15,846 --> 00:34:17,179
Yeah. Yeah.
467
00:34:17,848 --> 00:34:20,099
Dad was willing to go
with any name Mom wanted
468
00:34:20,183 --> 00:34:22,476
if it meant
he didn't have to take the dog back.
469
00:34:26,857 --> 00:34:28,190
Sweetie!
470
00:34:28,984 --> 00:34:30,025
Sweetie.
471
00:34:39,369 --> 00:34:41,036
Sweetie! Sweetie!
472
00:34:52,674 --> 00:34:55,009
I always thought I wanted a dog, but...
473
00:34:55,218 --> 00:34:57,219
I'm having second thoughts.
474
00:34:58,054 --> 00:35:00,389
All right, ready? Sit. Sit!
475
00:35:00,724 --> 00:35:03,017
Good! Hey, did you see that?
476
00:35:03,226 --> 00:35:04,560
Okay, now shake.
477
00:35:06,062 --> 00:35:08,230
Shake. Shake.
478
00:35:08,565 --> 00:35:09,857
Here you go.
479
00:35:12,068 --> 00:35:13,569
"Sweaty"?
480
00:35:15,030 --> 00:35:17,406
I'm pretty sure it spells Sweetie, Dad.
481
00:35:21,077 --> 00:35:22,411
Wow.
482
00:35:26,917 --> 00:35:29,919
I love you.
483
00:35:37,636 --> 00:35:39,553
With Sweetie around, I'd hoped.
484
00:35:39,638 --> 00:35:42,473
Dad would forget about
joining the Wilderness Explorers.
485
00:35:42,849 --> 00:35:45,684
But Dad connected
with his old troop master.
486
00:35:47,020 --> 00:35:49,021
As your father knows...
487
00:35:49,272 --> 00:35:52,858
we take our scouting
very seriously in Troop 133.
488
00:35:53,109 --> 00:35:54,151
It's true.
489
00:35:54,319 --> 00:35:57,321
Only the very best
get to be part of this troop.
490
00:35:57,531 --> 00:36:00,032
It's so great to be back here,
Troop Master Barrett!
491
00:36:00,283 --> 00:36:04,703
Now, you boys get yourselves a uniform,
and the first thing you'll do...
492
00:36:05,205 --> 00:36:09,041
is clean out
that musty old storage locker.
493
00:36:11,378 --> 00:36:13,212
Oh, really? Okay.
494
00:36:14,548 --> 00:36:16,632
Dad got more than he bargained for.
495
00:36:16,883 --> 00:36:20,219
But he couldn't wiggle out of it,
that would set a bad example.
496
00:36:20,470 --> 00:36:23,305
Whittling is the kind of skill
you'll need...
497
00:36:23,557 --> 00:36:26,642
for our upcoming wilderness weekend.
498
00:36:30,397 --> 00:36:31,981
I'm getting splinters.
499
00:36:32,232 --> 00:36:33,566
This is impossible.
500
00:36:35,986 --> 00:36:38,487
I have finished, Troop Master Barrett!
501
00:36:40,907 --> 00:36:43,909
It seems the only break I'll get this
summer is at the country club.
502
00:36:44,494 --> 00:36:47,413
That is, as long as Rodrick
doesn't ruin things.
503
00:36:51,167 --> 00:36:53,168
Don't forget about me.
504
00:36:54,087 --> 00:36:55,921
Go around the back!
505
00:37:01,928 --> 00:37:03,262
Marco!
506
00:37:04,097 --> 00:37:05,264
Polo!
507
00:37:06,433 --> 00:37:07,766
Marco!
508
00:37:08,435 --> 00:37:09,685
Polo!
509
00:37:28,955 --> 00:37:30,289
Rodrick?
510
00:37:30,957 --> 00:37:32,124
Rodrick!
511
00:37:32,375 --> 00:37:35,127
Hello, guvnor!
Top of the crumpet to you!
512
00:37:35,879 --> 00:37:40,049
Where's the nearest loo, mate?
Mustered up a wee little tinkle!
513
00:37:40,300 --> 00:37:41,800
I don't want to sound like a snob,
514
00:37:41,885 --> 00:37:44,637
but I'm not sure Rodrick
is country club material.
515
00:37:44,971 --> 00:37:46,305
Marco!
516
00:37:46,556 --> 00:37:47,723
Polo!
517
00:37:47,974 --> 00:37:50,726
Wow! You can hold your breath
a really long time!
518
00:37:50,977 --> 00:37:52,645
Would you like another smoothie?
519
00:37:52,896 --> 00:37:53,896
No, thanks. Polo!
520
00:37:54,147 --> 00:37:55,648
I'd like to order a few things.
521
00:37:55,982 --> 00:37:57,149
He's not serious.
522
00:37:57,400 --> 00:38:01,236
I'm very serious. Two orders of fries,
vanilla shake extra thick...
523
00:38:01,488 --> 00:38:02,905
and anything with bacon on it.
524
00:38:03,823 --> 00:38:05,324
Fish out of water!
525
00:38:05,659 --> 00:38:08,994
Finally! I thought I'd never find you!
526
00:38:09,663 --> 00:38:10,996
What's Rodrick doing here?
527
00:38:11,498 --> 00:38:14,166
I got invited! You got a problem?
528
00:38:14,501 --> 00:38:16,251
No! No problem!
529
00:38:18,171 --> 00:38:21,340
Mom is going to kill you!
When did you get a tattoo?
530
00:38:21,591 --> 00:38:23,926
There's a lot you don't know about me,
Greggy.
531
00:38:24,678 --> 00:38:27,763
Having Rodrick at the country club
really made me nervous.
532
00:38:29,015 --> 00:38:34,019
I told him to keep a low profile. I didn't
want to get fired from my fake job.
533
00:38:34,354 --> 00:38:37,189
But, of course, he didn't listen.
534
00:38:43,863 --> 00:38:45,531
It's Heather Hills time.
535
00:38:46,116 --> 00:38:47,533
Don't go over there.
536
00:38:47,867 --> 00:38:50,536
I'm not. She's coming to me.
537
00:38:52,038 --> 00:38:53,789
Rodrick did have a plan.
538
00:38:54,207 --> 00:38:57,209
Unfortunately, he came up with it himself.
539
00:38:57,711 --> 00:39:01,213
I guess he saw Heather's lifeguard outfit
and figured she'd be into...
540
00:39:01,464 --> 00:39:03,215
saving people and stuff.
541
00:39:08,221 --> 00:39:09,221
Cramp!
542
00:39:09,389 --> 00:39:12,725
Excuse me.
What time does the snack bar close?
543
00:39:13,059 --> 00:39:16,228
What am I, a guidebook?
Come back when you're drowning.
544
00:39:16,479 --> 00:39:17,479
Cramp!
545
00:39:18,982 --> 00:39:20,482
There's no need to be mean.
546
00:39:20,734 --> 00:39:23,235
Help! Hey, look, I'm drowning! Hey!
547
00:39:24,237 --> 00:39:27,014
Listen, shrimp, the reason I'm here
in this ridiculous outfit
548
00:39:27,098 --> 00:39:29,024
is to get credit for my
college application.
549
00:39:30,076 --> 00:39:31,577
Oh! I can't...
550
00:39:32,412 --> 00:39:33,579
I'm drowning!
551
00:39:35,248 --> 00:39:36,915
So bounce.
552
00:39:38,084 --> 00:39:40,419
Cramp! Help! Help!
553
00:39:41,588 --> 00:39:43,589
- What the...
- I got you!
554
00:39:43,840 --> 00:39:44,923
Who are you?
555
00:39:44,975 --> 00:39:46,775
- I don't even know you!
- You're okay.
556
00:39:46,926 --> 00:39:48,761
What is happening?
557
00:40:13,620 --> 00:40:15,070
Guess what?
558
00:40:15,155 --> 00:40:18,190
We're going to the shore this weekend
and my mom said I could invite you!
559
00:40:18,541 --> 00:40:20,501
The boardwalk's awesome.
560
00:40:20,585 --> 00:40:23,212
Go on the Cranium Shaker.
You haven't lived till you've done that.
561
00:40:23,463 --> 00:40:24,797
You should come!
562
00:40:25,048 --> 00:40:28,383
I think most people would agree
I'm a pretty likeable kid...
563
00:40:28,635 --> 00:40:32,137
but for some reason, I've never clicked
with Mr. Jefferson.
564
00:40:36,810 --> 00:40:38,477
Greg. Honey.
565
00:40:40,480 --> 00:40:42,981
Your father and I
have something to give you.
566
00:40:43,233 --> 00:40:47,236
You've showed us you're
responsible enough to have one.
567
00:40:47,737 --> 00:40:49,071
Your own cell phone.
568
00:40:49,322 --> 00:40:51,448
Are you serious? My own cell phone?
569
00:40:57,247 --> 00:40:58,914
It doesn't have a keypad.
570
00:40:59,249 --> 00:41:02,251
It's a starter phone.
You can call home or 911.
571
00:41:02,502 --> 00:41:04,169
We didn't want to overwhelm you.
572
00:41:05,839 --> 00:41:07,172
Thanks.
573
00:41:10,593 --> 00:41:12,010
Have a good time!
574
00:41:14,514 --> 00:41:15,681
See you.
575
00:41:21,938 --> 00:41:25,440
- We're going to the boardwalk!
- I can't wait to ride the Cranium Shaker!
576
00:41:25,692 --> 00:41:28,026
The Cranium Shaker?
577
00:41:28,862 --> 00:41:30,279
You're too funny, Greg.
578
00:41:32,949 --> 00:41:34,324
Who wants to sing?
579
00:41:34,701 --> 00:41:35,742
Me!
580
00:41:36,369 --> 00:41:40,706
Five thousand bottles of milk on the wall
Five thousand bottles of milk.
581
00:41:41,040 --> 00:41:43,208
Take one down, pass it around.
582
00:41:43,459 --> 00:41:46,628
Four thousand nine hundred ninety-nine
Bottles of milk on the wall.
583
00:41:53,970 --> 00:41:57,306
Sixteen bottles of milk on the wall
Sixteen bottles of milk.
584
00:41:57,557 --> 00:42:01,894
Take one down, pass it around
Fifteen bottles of milk on the wall.
585
00:42:12,322 --> 00:42:14,156
We're so far from the boardwalk.
586
00:42:14,949 --> 00:42:18,285
Oh, yeah! It's much quieter up here!
587
00:42:21,122 --> 00:42:24,958
Why don't we play "I love you because"?
588
00:42:26,169 --> 00:42:27,502
I'll start.
589
00:42:32,675 --> 00:42:34,009
I love you because...
590
00:42:34,636 --> 00:42:37,179
you're silly and you make me laugh.
591
00:42:39,349 --> 00:42:40,641
My turn.
592
00:42:46,814 --> 00:42:48,482
I love you because...
593
00:42:49,817 --> 00:42:52,027
you help me keep my body clean!
594
00:42:54,489 --> 00:42:55,822
Your turn, Greg.
595
00:43:01,371 --> 00:43:03,372
Land on me, land on me!
596
00:43:13,341 --> 00:43:15,342
I love you because...
597
00:43:17,178 --> 00:43:20,013
your mustache is... really...
598
00:43:24,352 --> 00:43:26,352
because...
599
00:43:37,573 --> 00:43:39,741
How do you even win this game?
600
00:43:54,424 --> 00:43:56,049
It's awfully crowded here.
601
00:43:56,259 --> 00:43:58,385
It's quieter at the amusement park.
602
00:43:58,594 --> 00:44:00,262
Who wants ice cream?
603
00:44:00,555 --> 00:44:02,222
- Strawberry!
- Vanilla for me.
604
00:44:02,432 --> 00:44:04,725
Rocky Road! Thanks.
605
00:44:20,950 --> 00:44:23,410
We like to share, it's more fun that way.
606
00:44:25,621 --> 00:44:26,621
Would you like some?
607
00:44:27,457 --> 00:44:28,790
Oh, no, thanks.
608
00:44:29,250 --> 00:44:32,085
I just remembered I'm lactose intolerant.
609
00:44:33,755 --> 00:44:36,757
Meet us back here in exactly one hour.
610
00:44:37,091 --> 00:44:39,259
And no scary rides for you boys.
611
00:44:39,469 --> 00:44:40,594
Got it.
612
00:44:44,766 --> 00:44:46,767
Cranium Shaker, here we come.
613
00:44:47,101 --> 00:44:48,935
But my mom said...
614
00:44:58,946 --> 00:45:00,781
We'll come back later
when the line goes down.
615
00:45:49,831 --> 00:45:51,373
There's no line!
616
00:45:55,711 --> 00:45:59,047
I did promise my mom
we wouldn't go on any scary rides.
617
00:45:59,340 --> 00:46:03,176
But Rodrick says you haven't lived till
you've been on the Cranium Shaker.
618
00:46:03,511 --> 00:46:05,512
- Have you been on this ride?
- It's way scary.
619
00:46:05,721 --> 00:46:07,389
Did you hear what happened last summer?
620
00:46:08,015 --> 00:46:09,349
My brother knows a guy
621
00:46:09,475 --> 00:46:12,686
whose second cousin's half-brother
went on this ride and got decapitated.
622
00:46:12,895 --> 00:46:13,937
- No way!
- Way.
623
00:46:14,063 --> 00:46:16,731
It's true. I was working the ride that day.
624
00:46:18,192 --> 00:46:22,529
The car came down
and his head... wasn't in it.
625
00:46:27,702 --> 00:46:30,537
When you guys get to the top...
626
00:46:31,038 --> 00:46:34,040
be sure not to rock the car
back and forth.
627
00:46:34,375 --> 00:46:35,709
That's how...
628
00:47:05,948 --> 00:47:07,949
He said not to rock the car!
629
00:47:08,242 --> 00:47:10,076
Or our heads will be torn off!
630
00:47:12,246 --> 00:47:16,750
Greg, in case we don't make it,
there's something I have to tell you.
631
00:47:17,418 --> 00:47:21,087
One time, I went to the bathroom
and I didn't wash my hands.
632
00:47:22,089 --> 00:47:25,592
One time, I used your toothbrush
to get dog poop off my shoe.
633
00:47:26,469 --> 00:47:27,636
Wait. What?
634
00:47:38,981 --> 00:47:41,149
Slow it down, slow it down, slow it down!
635
00:47:42,610 --> 00:47:43,610
Greg!
636
00:47:43,694 --> 00:47:44,778
Rowley!
637
00:47:45,488 --> 00:47:46,488
Greg, Greg!
638
00:47:50,284 --> 00:47:51,451
Please!
639
00:47:56,290 --> 00:47:57,958
Greg! Greg!
640
00:48:10,263 --> 00:48:12,847
You were supposed to meet us
an hour ago.
641
00:48:12,932 --> 00:48:14,266
We were searching everywhere.
642
00:48:14,517 --> 00:48:16,017
We were about to call the police.
643
00:48:16,936 --> 00:48:21,022
We're very disappointed in you, Rowley.
Very disappointed.
644
00:48:27,280 --> 00:48:29,114
They let us off easy!
645
00:48:30,533 --> 00:48:33,868
Why are you upset?
They didn't even yell at us.
646
00:48:34,120 --> 00:48:35,954
They almost yelled.
647
00:48:36,289 --> 00:48:39,457
That was nothing. My parents would
have screamed their heads off.
648
00:48:39,709 --> 00:48:41,209
They're disappointed in me.
649
00:48:41,460 --> 00:48:43,628
Big deal. Better than getting punished.
650
00:48:43,963 --> 00:48:47,299
Maybe for you. You're used to it.
651
00:49:00,229 --> 00:49:02,063
I can't wait to hit the hay.
652
00:49:02,315 --> 00:49:04,983
Hey, where are you going to sleep?
653
00:49:05,651 --> 00:49:09,154
I guess we're bunkmates!
Hope you don't snore.
654
00:49:40,895 --> 00:49:42,896
I can't take this anymore.
655
00:50:21,435 --> 00:50:24,771
"Help. Get me out of here."
656
00:50:25,106 --> 00:50:27,774
"These people are driving me crazy."
657
00:50:34,949 --> 00:50:35,949
Send, send, send!
658
00:50:46,460 --> 00:50:48,461
Good morning, sleepyheads!
659
00:50:50,464 --> 00:50:53,967
I have nine hundred and forty-nine e-mails?
660
00:50:56,470 --> 00:50:58,805
I need to go to the bathroom.
661
00:50:59,807 --> 00:51:01,808
I have to get out of here!
662
00:51:08,023 --> 00:51:10,692
Your call cannot be completed as dialed.
663
00:51:10,985 --> 00:51:13,820
Please check the number and dial again.
664
00:51:15,156 --> 00:51:16,531
What a piece of junk!
665
00:51:16,824 --> 00:51:19,993
911 .
What is the nature of your emergency?
666
00:51:23,330 --> 00:51:25,331
Hello? Are you hurt?
667
00:51:33,674 --> 00:51:35,717
Do you have anything to tell us, Greg?
668
00:51:36,343 --> 00:51:38,011
I don't think so.
669
00:51:38,220 --> 00:51:41,181
Anything about,
"These people are driving me crazy"?
670
00:51:48,022 --> 00:51:50,023
- Yes, Officers?
- He has a knife!
671
00:51:52,735 --> 00:51:54,068
Do not resist!
672
00:51:54,361 --> 00:51:55,403
Give me your hand!
673
00:51:55,863 --> 00:51:59,532
I tried to explain to Rowley's dad
that I didn't mean to call 911...
674
00:51:59,742 --> 00:52:02,911
but he really wasn't interested
in what I had to say.
675
00:52:03,204 --> 00:52:06,206
You're always getting into trouble
with that Rowley kid.
676
00:52:06,874 --> 00:52:09,375
I'm starting to think he's a bad influence.
677
00:52:16,091 --> 00:52:17,717
Hey, Rowley. How's it going?
678
00:52:18,219 --> 00:52:19,886
Okay, I guess.
679
00:52:20,387 --> 00:52:22,597
So, are we still on for the country club?
680
00:52:22,890 --> 00:52:25,725
Actually... I'm not going
to the country club today.
681
00:52:26,393 --> 00:52:27,560
Why not?
682
00:52:27,728 --> 00:52:30,897
What? Coming, Mom! Got to go!
683
00:52:34,902 --> 00:52:37,403
Ready to get my country club on!
684
00:52:39,114 --> 00:52:42,575
Rowley isn't going
and I can't get in without him.
685
00:52:42,910 --> 00:52:46,412
Okay. Well, you snuck me in.
686
00:52:46,747 --> 00:52:51,084
So instead,
sneak yourself in and then sneak me in.
687
00:52:51,293 --> 00:52:54,629
How? I need Rowley
to get me past the front desk.
688
00:52:54,922 --> 00:52:57,257
Greg! If you don't go to "work"...
689
00:52:57,591 --> 00:53:00,093
"Dad" will know you don't have a job.
690
00:53:07,268 --> 00:53:09,978
No problem, right?
Remember, you're a Jefferson.
691
00:53:10,271 --> 00:53:13,273
And don't forget to take out the trash.
692
00:53:15,109 --> 00:53:16,150
Hey.
693
00:53:18,445 --> 00:53:20,154
Aren't you going to say hello?
694
00:53:22,616 --> 00:53:23,783
Yes.
695
00:53:24,118 --> 00:53:26,619
How rude of me. Hello.
696
00:53:37,631 --> 00:53:38,798
Hey, Rowley!
697
00:53:40,050 --> 00:53:41,217
- Hey, Greg.
- Cool.
698
00:53:41,468 --> 00:53:43,052
I didn't expect to see you here.
699
00:53:43,304 --> 00:53:47,640
Yeah! Well, my plans changed.
700
00:53:48,309 --> 00:53:51,477
I changed my... change. I mean...
701
00:53:51,812 --> 00:53:53,897
Maybe I'll catch up with you later?
702
00:53:57,902 --> 00:53:59,235
I don't believe it!
703
00:53:59,987 --> 00:54:03,156
You lied. You never lie!
704
00:54:03,991 --> 00:54:06,993
My parents don't want me
to invite you anymore.
705
00:54:07,328 --> 00:54:10,246
I thought if I lied,
I wouldn't hurt your feelings.
706
00:54:37,232 --> 00:54:39,025
That was impressive.
707
00:55:08,806 --> 00:55:10,473
That's pretty high.
708
00:55:10,724 --> 00:55:12,558
Are you talking to yourself?
709
00:55:15,646 --> 00:55:17,230
No. Of course not!
710
00:55:17,481 --> 00:55:20,316
You were. You're talking to yourself
because you're scared.
711
00:55:22,486 --> 00:55:24,821
I'm not scared. That's crazy!
712
00:55:25,656 --> 00:55:28,908
You don't understand
because you're just a little kid.
713
00:55:30,995 --> 00:55:32,328
Then go.
714
00:56:06,697 --> 00:56:08,448
Holly! Where's your sunblock?
715
00:56:40,564 --> 00:56:43,066
I'm sorry. I don't understand.
716
00:56:43,400 --> 00:56:45,818
You see, I'm just a little kid.
717
00:56:50,407 --> 00:56:51,574
Hi, Greg!
718
00:56:53,911 --> 00:56:54,911
Hey, Holly!
719
00:56:55,162 --> 00:56:58,498
Oh, my gosh, it is so hot out.
It's nice to cool off in here.
720
00:56:58,749 --> 00:57:00,249
Yeah, great.
721
00:57:00,584 --> 00:57:03,169
I was going to get ice cream.
Want to join me?
722
00:57:03,670 --> 00:57:05,088
That'd be awesome!
723
00:57:06,090 --> 00:57:08,091
I mean, no.
724
00:57:08,509 --> 00:57:09,759
Another time, maybe.
725
00:57:10,010 --> 00:57:11,844
You sure? It's really good here.
726
00:57:13,263 --> 00:57:17,433
Yeah. I'm trying to lose a couple pounds.
Thanks anyways.
727
00:57:18,602 --> 00:57:19,852
Okay.
728
00:57:35,536 --> 00:57:38,538
I am not the kind of person
who likes skinny dipping...
729
00:57:38,789 --> 00:57:42,792
but I had no choice but to splash around
all day, avoiding people.
730
00:57:43,043 --> 00:57:45,628
Attention, everybody, the club will be
closing in 10 minutes,
731
00:57:45,712 --> 00:57:47,755
so everyone out of the pool.
732
00:57:52,302 --> 00:57:53,469
Rowley!
733
00:57:54,805 --> 00:57:56,973
Wait! I need help!
734
00:57:57,558 --> 00:57:59,142
How can I help you, sir?
735
00:58:03,814 --> 00:58:05,231
Could you pass me those?
736
00:58:06,316 --> 00:58:07,358
These?
737
00:58:29,173 --> 00:58:30,673
Oh, my gosh!
738
00:58:31,008 --> 00:58:32,675
You loser!
739
00:58:42,686 --> 00:58:47,190
I'm pretty sure that was the first and
last time I'll ever go on the high dive.
740
00:58:48,358 --> 00:58:52,612
Unfortunately, with all the excitement,
I forgot about Rodrick.
741
00:58:57,868 --> 00:58:59,035
Rodrick?
742
00:59:00,954 --> 00:59:01,498
Rodrick!
743
00:59:08,462 --> 00:59:12,131
Why are you hugging me when Mom
isn't here to see it? Get off me!
744
00:59:13,133 --> 00:59:14,133
Where have you been?
745
00:59:14,218 --> 00:59:16,510
Things might be getting harder
at the country club,
746
00:59:16,520 --> 00:59:19,004
but my fake job
made things much easier with Dad.
747
00:59:19,056 --> 00:59:20,389
Oh, brother.
748
00:59:22,142 --> 00:59:25,895
Daddy, can you make
my hiccups hic down?
749
00:59:26,146 --> 00:59:30,983
I have to pick up Manny from his play date.
We'll have dinner when I get back.
750
00:59:37,574 --> 00:59:38,741
Dad?
751
00:59:41,078 --> 00:59:42,161
Oh, no.
752
00:59:43,664 --> 00:59:45,748
I'm already in enough trouble.
753
00:59:46,750 --> 00:59:49,001
If that dog does anything to Tingy...
754
00:59:49,253 --> 00:59:50,586
Slow.
755
00:59:51,922 --> 00:59:53,089
Go.
756
01:00:02,933 --> 01:00:05,351
Good Sweetie.
757
01:00:06,103 --> 01:00:08,604
Who's a good boy?
758
01:00:09,940 --> 01:00:12,942
Who's going to give Tingy to Daddy?
759
01:00:13,443 --> 01:00:15,111
You are.
760
01:00:16,363 --> 01:00:17,697
You are!
761
01:00:18,782 --> 01:00:20,616
Come on, come on!
762
01:00:21,034 --> 01:00:22,868
Go that way, go that way!
763
01:00:41,555 --> 01:00:42,972
I have an idea.
764
01:00:47,644 --> 01:00:48,686
Here, Sweetie.
765
01:00:48,979 --> 01:00:51,314
Good idea. Good thinking!
766
01:00:54,735 --> 01:00:56,902
- Oh, good.
- Come on, Sweetie.
767
01:00:57,154 --> 01:00:59,322
Good, good, good, good.
768
01:01:02,326 --> 01:01:03,659
I got it!
769
01:01:03,994 --> 01:01:05,328
Don't let him have that.
770
01:01:06,413 --> 01:01:07,413
Sweetie!
771
01:01:07,664 --> 01:01:09,915
Don't let him have that! Don't eat that!
772
01:01:29,519 --> 01:01:32,021
Is that... dog spit?
773
01:01:32,439 --> 01:01:35,274
How could there be so much?
774
01:01:37,110 --> 01:01:38,194
- Susan!
- Mom!
775
01:01:38,362 --> 01:01:41,781
You go clean the house.
I'll clean the roast! Go!
776
01:01:49,539 --> 01:01:51,791
You boys barely touched your pot roast.
777
01:01:52,542 --> 01:01:55,211
Are you kidding? I'm stuffed.
778
01:01:55,462 --> 01:01:57,463
I filled up on vegetables.
779
01:01:57,714 --> 01:01:59,382
More for us, then.
780
01:02:02,719 --> 01:02:05,638
I don't know what you did different...
781
01:02:05,889 --> 01:02:09,725
but this pot roast is unbelievable.
782
01:02:12,062 --> 01:02:13,396
Chef's secret.
783
01:02:15,899 --> 01:02:17,066
Great.
784
01:02:17,317 --> 01:02:18,651
And juicier!
785
01:02:32,082 --> 01:02:33,416
And you are?
786
01:02:38,588 --> 01:02:40,256
I'm Roland Gropper.
787
01:02:40,590 --> 01:02:42,007
Have a nice day, Roland.
788
01:02:44,678 --> 01:02:46,345
Okay, you told one lie.
789
01:02:46,930 --> 01:02:49,924
I can accept that.
But this is getting out of control.
790
01:02:50,008 --> 01:02:51,800
I think you have a lying problem.
791
01:02:51,852 --> 01:02:56,188
I didn't lie about coming to the club
today! We didn't even talk today.
792
01:02:56,773 --> 01:03:00,276
And how do you keep getting in here
without me?
793
01:03:00,610 --> 01:03:02,445
Wait. You're not a member?
794
01:03:02,696 --> 01:03:04,780
Anyone want a smoothie?
795
01:03:05,198 --> 01:03:08,534
I don't care whether you're a member...
but why sneak in?
796
01:03:11,037 --> 01:03:13,122
I wanted to hang out with you.
797
01:03:13,373 --> 01:03:16,125
I gave you my phone number.
Why not just call me?
798
01:03:16,376 --> 01:03:19,044
I tried, but I only had half the number,
and...
799
01:03:19,296 --> 01:03:21,964
I'm freaking out!
The D.J. for my Sweet Sixteen canceled...
800
01:03:22,215 --> 01:03:25,718
so he can fly to Africa
to help build a hospital. What a jerk!
801
01:03:25,969 --> 01:03:28,387
Now what do I do for music? Whistle?
802
01:03:29,055 --> 01:03:30,139
What about live music?
803
01:03:31,558 --> 01:03:33,058
Do you know the band Löded Diper?
804
01:03:33,810 --> 01:03:35,144
That's a gross name.
805
01:03:35,395 --> 01:03:37,271
Live music would be really cool!
806
01:03:37,355 --> 01:03:40,232
You'd be the first at our school
to have a real band.
807
01:03:41,234 --> 01:03:42,401
That's true.
808
01:03:42,652 --> 01:03:45,738
They're just coming off a world tour
and are in town.
809
01:03:45,989 --> 01:03:48,407
I could get them to come as a favor for me.
810
01:03:48,658 --> 01:03:49,992
What kind of music do they play?
811
01:03:50,243 --> 01:03:52,661
Anything! They can play anything.
812
01:04:05,175 --> 01:04:06,175
Where were you?
813
01:04:06,426 --> 01:04:09,261
Rodrick, you are going to owe me
the rest of your life.
814
01:04:10,013 --> 01:04:12,848
I got Löded Diper a gig...
815
01:04:13,183 --> 01:04:15,935
playing at Heather Hills' Sweet Sixteen.
816
01:04:17,187 --> 01:04:18,354
Really?
817
01:04:35,705 --> 01:04:37,706
Löded Diper activate.
818
01:04:39,576 --> 01:04:41,460
- You have her favorite song.
- Song, check.
819
01:04:41,611 --> 01:04:43,279
- She wants you in tuxes.
- Tuxes, check.
820
01:04:43,330 --> 01:04:45,389
You're ignoring
everything I'm saying, aren't you?
821
01:04:45,473 --> 01:04:46,540
Ignoring you, check.
822
01:04:46,550 --> 01:04:50,469
Don't worry, little bro. It's going to be
a good show. The best.
823
01:04:55,642 --> 01:04:59,645
Rowley! What are you doing next week?
Löded Diper needs roadies!
824
01:04:59,896 --> 01:05:02,064
How can you stand to be near me
when I lied?
825
01:05:02,649 --> 01:05:03,983
- What?
- I'm a liar.
826
01:05:04,234 --> 01:05:06,569
You can never trust me again.
827
01:05:06,653 --> 01:05:08,654
The sacred bond of our friendship
is broken.
828
01:05:08,905 --> 01:05:12,658
Rowley, I get it.
You didn't want to hurt my feelings.
829
01:05:13,910 --> 01:05:17,162
And I didn't mean to get you
in trouble with the Cranium Shaker.
830
01:05:17,581 --> 01:05:19,081
That's all right.
831
01:05:19,416 --> 01:05:23,586
It was actually pretty fun.
Now we can say we've really lived.
832
01:05:23,837 --> 01:05:26,338
So what about the gig?
833
01:05:26,590 --> 01:05:28,090
I've always wanted to be a roadie!
834
01:05:36,266 --> 01:05:38,100
Rise and shine, buddy!
835
01:05:38,768 --> 01:05:40,603
Don't want to be late for work.
836
01:05:40,854 --> 01:05:44,273
I'll drop you off at the way to the office,
okay?
837
01:05:45,025 --> 01:05:47,151
Now Holly knows I'm not a member,
838
01:05:47,235 --> 01:05:49,361
there's no reason
to sneak into the country club.
839
01:05:49,613 --> 01:05:53,949
But if my dad finds out I don't really have
a job, my life won't be worth living.
840
01:05:54,284 --> 01:05:55,451
Thanks, Dad.
841
01:05:59,289 --> 01:06:02,791
I'm even considering telling him
I got downsized.
842
01:06:06,463 --> 01:06:08,297
But I don't think he'll like it.
843
01:06:08,965 --> 01:06:10,799
The thing is, I'm using...
844
01:06:11,051 --> 01:06:14,386
so many identities,
I'm having trouble keeping track of them.
845
01:06:14,638 --> 01:06:16,639
This bill is five times the normal amount.
846
01:06:16,973 --> 01:06:18,349
I'm sorry, Mr. Jefferson,
847
01:06:18,433 --> 01:06:21,977
but your son has been ordering
a lot of smoothies this month.
848
01:06:22,312 --> 01:06:24,146
There he is now.
849
01:06:24,731 --> 01:06:26,065
That is not my son.
850
01:06:26,316 --> 01:06:27,983
Of course. That's Roland Gropper.
851
01:06:28,234 --> 01:06:29,568
Good morning, Arthur!
852
01:06:29,819 --> 01:06:31,153
Hey, Rowley!
853
01:06:31,488 --> 01:06:34,323
Rowley! My man! What's up?
854
01:06:36,660 --> 01:06:38,994
Hey! You forgot your sunblock.
855
01:06:40,497 --> 01:06:41,497
Frank Heffley.
856
01:06:42,832 --> 01:06:45,501
Your son racked up a lot of charges
on my account.
857
01:06:45,752 --> 01:06:48,087
What? He works here. Tell him.
858
01:06:48,338 --> 01:06:51,924
There must be some mistake.
We don't employ minors.
859
01:07:02,769 --> 01:07:04,186
Do you not work here?
860
01:07:07,190 --> 01:07:08,691
Maybe not.
861
01:07:30,380 --> 01:07:33,882
$260 worth of smoothies?
What were you thinking?
862
01:07:35,051 --> 01:07:37,720
I didn't know you get charged
for what you order.
863
01:07:42,559 --> 01:07:43,642
I'll pay.
864
01:07:43,893 --> 01:07:44,893
Very good, sir.
865
01:08:04,664 --> 01:08:08,584
Aren't you going to yell at me?
Aren't you mad?
866
01:08:11,087 --> 01:08:12,254
No.
867
01:08:14,257 --> 01:08:16,592
I'm just disappointed.
868
01:08:24,100 --> 01:08:25,434
We've got some serious trouble.
869
01:08:25,685 --> 01:08:27,686
Not you. Me.
870
01:08:27,937 --> 01:08:29,271
Yeah, mostly you.
871
01:08:29,606 --> 01:08:31,607
Look what I found in the mail.
872
01:08:39,115 --> 01:08:43,368
Welcome, prospective parents,
to Spag Union Preparatory School.
873
01:08:43,703 --> 01:08:47,539
Through these gates is a world in which
your boy will learn to thrive.
874
01:08:47,791 --> 01:08:51,710
Here we will impress upon him
our three cornerstones to success:
875
01:08:51,961 --> 01:08:56,465
Intensive study, physical exercise,
and, of course, discipline.
876
01:08:57,133 --> 01:08:58,467
I used to play video games.
877
01:08:59,302 --> 01:09:02,888
I was playing all the time...
sometimes two hours a day.
878
01:09:03,139 --> 01:09:06,475
I'd lie to my parents
and tell them I was studying when...
879
01:09:06,810 --> 01:09:10,229
really, I'd sneak to the mall
to hang out with my friends.
880
01:09:10,480 --> 01:09:15,567
My parents sent me to Spag Union.
881
01:09:15,902 --> 01:09:18,403
I don't waste my time
with video games anymore.
882
01:09:18,655 --> 01:09:22,658
Spag Union taught me there's more
adventure to be found in a good book.
883
01:09:25,328 --> 01:09:26,995
I don't lie about where I am anymore.
884
01:09:28,248 --> 01:09:29,957
Thanks to Spag Union
885
01:09:30,041 --> 01:09:33,252
and the tracking device around my ankle,
my parents know...
886
01:09:33,503 --> 01:09:35,170
where I am 24/7.
887
01:09:35,421 --> 01:09:40,425
Spag Union, turning irresponsible
Iittle boys into men since 1925.
888
01:09:40,677 --> 01:09:42,344
Spag Union!
889
01:09:42,929 --> 01:09:44,513
They're going to send you there.
890
01:09:45,098 --> 01:09:46,765
I really messed up.
891
01:09:47,600 --> 01:09:48,684
What do I do?
892
01:09:49,602 --> 01:09:50,727
Wilderness weekend!
893
01:09:50,812 --> 01:09:54,189
You have 48 hours to prove to Dad
you don't need Spag Union.
894
01:09:54,774 --> 01:09:55,858
How?
895
01:09:56,693 --> 01:10:00,863
By being the all-time best
Wilderness Explorer there ever was.
896
01:10:04,200 --> 01:10:07,870
You can't go to Spag Union!
I don't want to go to school without you!
897
01:10:08,872 --> 01:10:10,873
It's not really my choice.
898
01:10:55,919 --> 01:10:58,587
You got it? Is it solid?
899
01:10:59,172 --> 01:11:00,172
Yes, sir!
900
01:11:02,175 --> 01:11:03,216
"Sir"?
901
01:11:12,101 --> 01:11:13,685
What are you doing?
902
01:11:14,437 --> 01:11:16,271
This is where my troops set up!
903
01:11:16,522 --> 01:11:19,191
Come on, Stan.
There's plenty of good sites.
904
01:11:19,442 --> 01:11:22,277
Give me a break. You don't know
the first thing about camping.
905
01:11:22,612 --> 01:11:27,282
You know the rules, Stan. Whoever gets
here first gets the pick of the campsites.
906
01:11:27,533 --> 01:11:31,036
The best way to lay claim to a camp
is to put tents on it.
907
01:11:33,289 --> 01:11:35,624
Explorers! Install camp!
908
01:11:36,125 --> 01:11:37,793
Hey, wait. Wait!
909
01:11:38,544 --> 01:11:41,213
Here, come on, come on, come on!
910
01:11:41,631 --> 01:11:42,798
Hold it up!
911
01:11:43,049 --> 01:11:44,049
- Put it on!
- I'm trying!
912
01:11:44,300 --> 01:11:45,801
Not here, over there!
913
01:11:51,474 --> 01:11:53,475
Move! Get the front!
914
01:12:13,496 --> 01:12:16,915
Sorry, Frank.
Doesn't look like there's any room...
915
01:12:17,166 --> 01:12:21,253
for troops here,
but there's still plenty of good sites.
916
01:12:24,173 --> 01:12:29,011
Yeah, it's mighty convenient
being so close to the bathrooms.
917
01:12:39,272 --> 01:12:42,024
You all know the story
of the muddy hand, don't you?
918
01:12:43,359 --> 01:12:46,194
It was a dark and stormy night,
like this one.
919
01:12:46,529 --> 01:12:47,863
It is not stormy.
920
01:12:48,114 --> 01:12:51,867
In these very woods,
an old woodsman, a kindly soul...
921
01:12:52,118 --> 01:12:55,954
was chopping wood in the rain for
a group of Wilderness Explorers.
922
01:12:56,456 --> 01:12:58,457
- So what happened?
- Nothing.
923
01:12:58,708 --> 01:13:02,878
If you consider the old woodsman
chopping off his own hand was nothing!
924
01:13:03,296 --> 01:13:05,797
- Didn't the Wilderness Explorers help him?
- No.
925
01:13:06,049 --> 01:13:08,050
They got scared and ran away.
926
01:13:08,301 --> 01:13:09,384
Why would they do that?
927
01:13:09,635 --> 01:13:11,970
Back at camp, the boys got to talking.
928
01:13:12,555 --> 01:13:15,515
They decided that they should have
helped the old woodsman
929
01:13:15,600 --> 01:13:17,225
because he was helping them.
930
01:13:17,560 --> 01:13:21,480
But when they got back to his cottage,
his body was gone!
931
01:13:21,814 --> 01:13:22,814
Gone?
932
01:13:22,982 --> 01:13:24,649
All that was left...
933
01:13:24,901 --> 01:13:26,568
was his hand!
934
01:13:26,819 --> 01:13:28,570
I don't like this story.
935
01:13:28,905 --> 01:13:32,741
Not one of those boys was ever seen again.
936
01:13:33,076 --> 01:13:37,746
The only clue to what happened was
a muddy handprint on the side of the tent.
937
01:13:38,581 --> 01:13:40,499
They say the muddy hand
is still out there...
938
01:13:41,417 --> 01:13:44,169
looking for more Wilderness Explorers...
939
01:13:45,088 --> 01:13:46,088
and...
940
01:13:46,547 --> 01:13:47,964
revenge!
941
01:13:49,926 --> 01:13:51,259
I don't buy it.
942
01:13:51,761 --> 01:13:53,762
How can a hand move by itself?
943
01:13:58,851 --> 01:14:02,187
I remember "The Muddy Hand"
from when I was a boy.
944
01:14:02,438 --> 01:14:05,107
You can't beat the classics.
945
01:14:05,441 --> 01:14:08,443
Okay! Bedtime, everyone.
946
01:14:17,578 --> 01:14:18,912
Muddy hand!
947
01:14:20,748 --> 01:14:22,082
Why'd you do that?
948
01:14:22,375 --> 01:14:24,793
- Do what?
- Hit me in the hand with a mallet!
949
01:14:25,086 --> 01:14:28,255
- Me?
- Yeah, you, with the mallet in your hand!
950
01:14:30,091 --> 01:14:32,342
I can't stop making you mad at me.
951
01:14:32,927 --> 01:14:34,261
If you...
952
01:14:38,266 --> 01:14:39,766
Why am I mad?
953
01:14:41,018 --> 01:14:42,769
Because I keep messing up.
954
01:14:44,105 --> 01:14:47,941
Look, everybody messes up. Even me.
955
01:14:50,111 --> 01:14:52,779
But I'm not afraid to admit it when I do.
956
01:14:56,951 --> 01:14:58,952
Just go to sleep.
957
01:15:25,646 --> 01:15:30,650
I hear at Spag Union, you have to call the
teachers "sir", even the ladies!
958
01:15:35,239 --> 01:15:36,907
Did you see their tents?
959
01:15:37,116 --> 01:15:41,119
They weren't even arranged in formation!
What a bunch of losers.
960
01:15:41,495 --> 01:15:45,332
Come on, son.
A troop is only as good as its leader.
961
01:15:45,666 --> 01:15:49,211
Any troop that would let Frank Heffley
be Assistant Troop Master
962
01:15:49,295 --> 01:15:50,337
is bound to be weak.
963
01:15:51,122 --> 01:15:53,189
There are two types of people in the world.
964
01:15:53,674 --> 01:15:54,674
Predators...
965
01:15:55,009 --> 01:15:56,343
and prey.
966
01:15:56,844 --> 01:15:59,846
Frank Heffley is a wounded gazelle.
967
01:16:03,351 --> 01:16:05,685
I'll show them what Heffleys can do.
968
01:16:05,937 --> 01:16:09,522
Don't make things worse.
You'll end up at Spag Union for sure.
969
01:16:09,774 --> 01:16:13,443
Only if we get caught. And I have a plan.
970
01:16:17,531 --> 01:16:19,532
This is campsite 42.
971
01:16:19,867 --> 01:16:21,534
This "X" is Stan Warren's tent.
972
01:16:21,869 --> 01:16:25,622
We wait till they're not looking and
weave a web between these trees.
973
01:16:25,873 --> 01:16:27,874
Then we make the web super-sticky.
974
01:16:28,209 --> 01:16:32,212
Then we get some ants and put them
in their sleeping bags.
975
01:16:32,546 --> 01:16:36,132
When they get into their bunks,
the ants will drive them crazy!
976
01:16:36,184 --> 01:16:38,761
They'II come running
out and get stuck in
977
01:16:38,762 --> 01:16:41,337
the web like flies.
Revenge will be ours.
978
01:16:47,144 --> 01:16:48,311
What are you doing?
979
01:16:48,562 --> 01:16:51,564
I've been ensnared by my own handiwork.
980
01:16:57,989 --> 01:16:58,989
Here are the ants.
981
01:16:59,240 --> 01:17:01,157
I'll signal you if anything happens.
982
01:17:01,575 --> 01:17:03,243
Hoot-hoot! Hoot-hoot!
983
01:17:03,577 --> 01:17:04,911
Come on.
984
01:17:26,767 --> 01:17:29,394
A refrigerator? Ready-made meals?
985
01:17:30,104 --> 01:17:31,104
A TV?
986
01:17:32,273 --> 01:17:33,940
This isn't camping!
987
01:17:34,275 --> 01:17:36,609
Hoot-hoot! Hoot-hoot!
988
01:17:45,077 --> 01:17:49,247
Good-bye, Gregory. You will always
be remembered for your bravery.
989
01:17:55,463 --> 01:17:57,130
Raccoons.
990
01:17:59,467 --> 01:18:00,800
Okay.
991
01:18:01,302 --> 01:18:03,136
Where are you?
992
01:18:04,305 --> 01:18:05,805
Hey, little guy!
993
01:18:06,098 --> 01:18:08,808
Daddy needs a new fur hat!
994
01:18:08,976 --> 01:18:11,811
Come out, come out, wherever you are!
995
01:18:15,775 --> 01:18:17,317
Who's there? Show yourself!
996
01:18:30,956 --> 01:18:33,625
Someone from your troop
violated our campsite.
997
01:18:33,834 --> 01:18:36,002
That was a thousand dollar tent!
998
01:18:38,672 --> 01:18:40,840
Okay, what happened?
999
01:18:48,849 --> 01:18:49,849
I did it.
1000
01:18:50,059 --> 01:18:51,393
Greg, no!
1001
01:18:52,353 --> 01:18:53,520
Dad.
1002
01:18:54,188 --> 01:18:55,855
It was my idea.
1003
01:18:56,649 --> 01:18:59,317
I can't let them take the fall for me.
1004
01:19:00,653 --> 01:19:02,654
We didn't mean to burn up the tent.
1005
01:19:03,197 --> 01:19:04,531
No, but...
1006
01:19:04,824 --> 01:19:06,157
we did.
1007
01:19:09,870 --> 01:19:12,163
Greg was only defending your honor!
1008
01:19:12,373 --> 01:19:14,207
Mr. Warren disrespected you.
1009
01:19:14,500 --> 01:19:16,668
He called you a wounded gazelle.
1010
01:19:16,877 --> 01:19:18,336
Your boy should be expelled.
1011
01:19:18,421 --> 01:19:21,047
He's a disgrace
to every Wilderness Explorer...
1012
01:19:21,382 --> 01:19:24,217
Shut up, Stan! Just shut up!
1013
01:19:25,886 --> 01:19:27,554
Hey, what is that?
1014
01:19:29,723 --> 01:19:32,183
A store-bought s'mores maker?
1015
01:19:32,393 --> 01:19:33,685
A TV?
1016
01:19:33,894 --> 01:19:35,562
Pre-tied knots?
1017
01:19:36,230 --> 01:19:37,897
Stan, you're a phony!
1018
01:19:38,190 --> 01:19:39,899
So much for the big camper.
1019
01:19:40,192 --> 01:19:43,528
I'm going to report this
to the Wilderness Committee.
1020
01:19:43,737 --> 01:19:46,739
We'll see who looks ridiculous then, huh?
1021
01:19:49,076 --> 01:19:50,326
From what I hear,
1022
01:19:50,411 --> 01:19:54,080
Mr. Warren was completely abandoned
by his Wilderness Explorer troop.
1023
01:19:55,416 --> 01:19:59,252
These days, he runs a badminton league
for kindergarteners.
1024
01:20:02,756 --> 01:20:04,424
Let's get out of here.
1025
01:20:07,595 --> 01:20:09,596
I have a confession to make.
1026
01:20:09,930 --> 01:20:11,598
I hate camping.
1027
01:20:13,100 --> 01:20:16,936
I don't understand what's so great
about sleeping in a bag.
1028
01:20:17,188 --> 01:20:20,857
Like being in a bag isn't bad enough,
you have to lie in the dirt, too!
1029
01:20:21,108 --> 01:20:22,775
I know. It's crazy!
1030
01:20:23,027 --> 01:20:24,360
Beds were invented for a reason.
1031
01:20:24,612 --> 01:20:28,615
Yeah. And roofs. And walls.
And bathrooms.
1032
01:20:29,283 --> 01:20:31,451
Pizza delivery places.
1033
01:20:37,958 --> 01:20:39,292
Hey, look at me.
1034
01:20:42,880 --> 01:20:44,964
I'm not sending you to Spag Union.
1035
01:20:47,801 --> 01:20:50,303
You know what my grandpa used to say?
1036
01:20:54,558 --> 01:20:57,227
"A man who never made a mistake..."
1037
01:20:57,811 --> 01:20:59,646
"...never made anything."
1038
01:21:01,649 --> 01:21:03,149
The trick is...
1039
01:21:03,400 --> 01:21:05,985
to be responsible and learn
from your mistakes.
1040
01:21:07,488 --> 01:21:09,489
And you can do that.
1041
01:21:10,491 --> 01:21:12,909
You're a really great kid, Greg.
1042
01:21:14,662 --> 01:21:18,831
And I'm not just saying that because
we're a lot alike.
1043
01:21:23,704 --> 01:21:26,081
Comic strip fans all
over the country are
1044
01:21:26,082 --> 01:21:28,458
rejoicing at the news
that the beloved...
1045
01:21:28,509 --> 01:21:30,343
Li'l Cutie will continue.
1046
01:21:30,594 --> 01:21:34,013
The son of cartoonist Bob Post
is taking over for his father...
1047
01:21:34,348 --> 01:21:37,392
and says he is looking forward to
continuing Li'l Cutie's adventures
1048
01:21:37,476 --> 01:21:39,310
for generations to come.
1049
01:21:39,603 --> 01:21:43,189
- It can't be happening!
- We'll never get rid of that garbage!
1050
01:21:43,857 --> 01:21:46,192
Oh, golly.
1051
01:21:46,527 --> 01:21:50,297
I have to say, I didn't expect the
Wilderness weekend to work out so well.
1052
01:21:50,331 --> 01:21:53,533
Now all I have to worry about is getting
through Löded Diper's gig
1053
01:21:53,617 --> 01:21:56,035
without looking like an idiot.
1054
01:22:03,794 --> 01:22:05,128
You're on in 30 minutes.
1055
01:22:05,379 --> 01:22:09,882
Relax! My brother was working on the
pyrotechnics all day, it's gonna kick butt.
1056
01:22:10,134 --> 01:22:12,552
Wait. What does your brother do?
1057
01:22:12,803 --> 01:22:14,137
He's a demolition expert.
1058
01:22:14,388 --> 01:22:19,058
Leave the rocking to us, okay?
It's what we do.
1059
01:22:19,310 --> 01:22:20,643
Now get to work, roadies.
1060
01:22:25,899 --> 01:22:28,484
Wow. Is that supposed to be Heather?
1061
01:22:29,945 --> 01:22:30,945
Weird.
1062
01:22:31,405 --> 01:22:33,072
This is amazing!
1063
01:22:34,074 --> 01:22:36,242
There's even a chocolate fountain!
1064
01:22:40,331 --> 01:22:42,999
What are you doing?
You two are roadies.
1065
01:22:43,500 --> 01:22:47,503
Which means you're employees.
No chocolate fountain for employees.
1066
01:22:48,088 --> 01:22:49,505
These guys are my friends.
1067
01:22:49,757 --> 01:22:51,090
Wow, Holly.
1068
01:22:51,592 --> 01:22:54,927
Wow. You've managed to take
my Sweet Sixteen...
1069
01:22:55,262 --> 01:22:56,929
and make it all about you.
1070
01:22:57,431 --> 01:22:59,432
- So selfish!
- So selfish!
1071
01:23:00,768 --> 01:23:05,104
Listen, midgets, the only reason you're
here is 'cause I was forced to invite you.
1072
01:23:05,439 --> 01:23:08,107
So stay out of my eye-line! ¿ Comprende?
1073
01:23:12,363 --> 01:23:13,529
She's into drama.
1074
01:23:13,781 --> 01:23:15,531
She's like Rodrick in a dress!
1075
01:23:17,284 --> 01:23:19,285
Is your brother's band all set up?
1076
01:23:19,953 --> 01:23:22,288
I'm really looking forward
to their performance.
1077
01:23:31,215 --> 01:23:32,799
It was your grandmother's.
1078
01:23:33,050 --> 01:23:35,051
So it's, like, used?
1079
01:23:38,639 --> 01:23:39,722
Ben!
1080
01:23:39,973 --> 01:23:44,727
I need to make a love connection with
Heather. I want to sing lead vocals.
1081
01:23:45,062 --> 01:23:47,313
But I don't know how to play drums.
1082
01:23:47,564 --> 01:23:50,900
Dude, two words, fast and loud.
1083
01:23:51,151 --> 01:23:52,985
Especially loud.
1084
01:23:55,322 --> 01:23:58,991
Oh my signal, press that red button, okay?
1085
01:24:00,494 --> 01:24:02,328
Shoo! Move, move!
1086
01:24:04,498 --> 01:24:08,167
This song goes out
to a very special little lady.
1087
01:24:08,669 --> 01:24:10,336
Heather Hills...
1088
01:24:10,754 --> 01:24:12,088
this one's for you.
1089
01:24:14,925 --> 01:24:18,010
Why aren't they in tuxes?
They were supposed to wear tuxes!
1090
01:24:25,352 --> 01:24:27,186
It's her favorite song.
1091
01:25:03,891 --> 01:25:07,059
I need to dazzle her.
Crank it up Full Diper!
1092
01:25:07,394 --> 01:25:08,394
Hit that button!
1093
01:26:00,781 --> 01:26:02,114
No. No!
1094
01:26:03,951 --> 01:26:05,618
I'm going to kill you!
1095
01:26:28,141 --> 01:26:30,643
So, Heather... you're a pretty cool chick.
1096
01:26:31,270 --> 01:26:34,480
Maybe I could call you next week
and we could hang?
1097
01:26:46,493 --> 01:26:47,994
Go for it.
1098
01:26:54,668 --> 01:26:56,002
I'm really sorry.
1099
01:26:56,962 --> 01:26:59,338
Don't be. This is awesome!
1100
01:27:00,340 --> 01:27:02,842
She wanted people to remember
her Sweet Sixteen.
1101
01:27:04,845 --> 01:27:07,305
People will definitely remember this.
1102
01:27:20,152 --> 01:27:21,235
Okay, so...
1103
01:27:21,695 --> 01:27:24,316
the summer didn't
go exactly as planned,
1104
01:27:24,317 --> 01:27:26,699
but in the end, it
all worked out okay.
1105
01:27:26,992 --> 01:27:30,494
Rowley and Holly came to the municipal
pool as my guests.
1106
01:27:34,541 --> 01:27:36,000
Hey! Who's hungry?
1107
01:27:44,676 --> 01:27:49,055
All in all, this might go down
as the best summer ever.
1108
01:27:53,226 --> 01:27:56,228
As for my dad, we may not see eye to eye
on everything...
1109
01:27:56,521 --> 01:27:57,855
but we work as a team.
1110
01:27:58,065 --> 01:27:59,857
Sweetie, not the roast again!
1111
01:28:00,067 --> 01:28:01,400
- Drop it!
- Bad dog!
1112
01:28:01,735 --> 01:28:03,235
- Good dog!
- Good Sweetie!
1113
01:28:03,260 --> 01:28:18,260
© anoXmous
@ https://thepiratebay.se/user/anoXmous
83016
