Original subtitles

(OPENING THEME PLAYING)

(FLUTE PLAYING)

(GROWLING)

The dragon!

(ROARING)

What's the plan, bro?

There can only be one plan.

I wanna ride that dragon!

Oh, sick! Ride that dragon, yo!

Oh! I am riding this dragon!

I too wish to ride the dragon!

Then come ride the dragon, girl!

Now I am riding the dragon.

Now she's riding the dragon.

You two! Come up here and ride this dragon!

(SNAPS FINGERS)

♪ We're gonna ride that dragon that dragon

♪ We're gonna ride that dragon that dragon

♪ We're gonna ride that dragon that dragon ♪

Whoa, whoa, whoa! What is going on here?

We're playing this awesome game called Dragon's Fire.

It's really cool. We pretend to ride a dragon.

You should ride the dragon with us!

Oh, I'd love to.

Except you're playing it completely wrong!

This game has a strict set of rules that must be followed.

We don't care about rules, bro.

We just want to get lost in the magic of a fantasy world, yo.

But if you follow the rules, you'll experience a magical, fantastical adventure

that will leave you frothing with joy!

I wish to do the joy froth!

(GULPING)

Let's get magical, bro!

All right! The first step on your magical adventure

is to fill these out.

What is this, homework?

Homework? (BUZZER) Boring!

This is a worksheet to calculate your character's skills

using basic mathematics.

Man, come on, you know our brains can't do math magics.

(GROANS)

Then just draw a picture of your character and I'll do the rest.

That we can do.

BEAST BOY: Check it. I'm a hyena!

(LAUGHING)

RAVEN: I'm a horrible monster hiding under a cloak.

(ROARS)

STARFIRE: I am the warrior princess!

CYBORG: I'm a tinman, baby! Clankity clank!

And your character, Robin?

Oh, me? No big deal. Just a half elf battle mage called Nightslasher.

Savior of the nine kingdoms of men,

Nightslasher wields not only the magical staff of Gamesh,

but the secret flute of Katang.

You got a stick and a flute?

Nice.

Thank you. Now, I've crafted a magical adventure for us

that involves some pretty exciting stuff.

-Riding dragons? -No.

-Necromancers? -Nope.

The fairies?

Even better, we will embark upon a quest to retrieve

a key.

A magical key?

ROBIN: A regular key!

That opens a magic door?

A regular door!

That sounds boring.

I knew you'd be excited! Let's get started.

Our party travels upon the southern road towards Th'lach'mo'or

through the ancient forest of Threllegh'vehn!

-Thrella what? -Threllegh'vehn!

Trailing vahagaha?

The forest! Your party is in the forest.

Forest, huh? I wanna climb some trees!

Okay, roll the dice.

No, bro, I said I want to climb trees.

In this game, these dice determine your every action!

If you want to climb a tree, you have to roll the dice.

Ugh. Fine.

A one! Yeah! I'm number one! That's good, right?

Ooh. No. That is the worst number.

Hyena falls from the tree, hits his head on a branch and gets a concussion.

Oh, come on!

I wish to search for the fairies!

Ooh. The warrior princess attempts to search for fairies

but hits her head on a branch and gets a concussion.

Sadness.

-Yeah, this is boring. -It's magical!

Then why do you keep killing the magic with all this boring stuff?

I told you, the game has a strict set of rules!

-Forget that. -I'm gonna find a dragon.

-There he is! -(ROARING)

No! There is not! I told you to play by the rules!

You're ruining everything!

(WHIRRING)

-(ALL GASPING) -What is the happening?

(ALL SCREAMING)

-Whoa! -I look so cool!

Oh, my! We have the epicness!

Wow! We're super fresh!

Hmm. I'd imagined I'd be a little taller than this.

I think we're in that forest of Chillavagahanahaja.

Threllegh'vhehn.

Truluvuluhulahu.

(ANGRILY) Threllegh'vhehn!

-Threfelha. -Troopadoopadoo.

Just call it the forest!

And obviously, we're now stuck in here

because you didn't follow the rules of the game.

So, when you said the game was magical, you meant, like, for real?

Of course. It's all about wizards and dragons. What did you expect?

This is actually pretty cool. We could see a dragon for real.

STARFIRE: (GASPS) We could ride the dragon for the reals!

Absolutely not.

That's the kind of imaginative excitement that got us into this mess.

The only way out is to finish the original adventure and find the key.

We'll start where all great adventures start.

(THUNDER RUMBLING)

CYBORG: What kind of great adventure starts at a greasy motel?

ROBIN: It's a charming inn!

(DOOR CREAKING)

(THUNDER RUMBLING)

Good morrow, m'lords and gentlefolk.

(BURPS)

Oh, look. A grizzled old innkeeper like that

is sure to point us in the direction of adventure.

(SPITS)

Ew.

Hark, innkeep, have you any work for a band of brave adventurers?

I've got a problem.

(SPITS)

Vicious creatures in the basement.

Claws. Red eyes. Fangs like you've never seen.

Dragons?

Rats. (SPITS)

So? Call an exterminator.

Now, let us find the real adventure.

Hey! Remember, to get home we have to finish this adventure.

Fine. (GROANS)

But we want to see something magical, bro.

Oh, you'll see something magical all right.

(DOOR CREAKS)

(BLOWS)

Steady yourselves.

I've got this. Rats are my bros.

(HISSING)

Ahhh!

They're not bros!

I told you we'd see something magical.

Look at the size of those rats!

To arms, friends!

Prepare to taste the Tinman's warhammer. (ROARING)

(METAL CREAKING)

I can't attack 'em.

Of course you can't. You have to roll the dice to attack.

Really? (GROANS)

Another one? This dice is broken.

Now, the rats get to roll.

A 10. Not bad.

(CYBORG SCREAMING)

Give me that.

Nice. Azarath Metrion Zinthos!

Phew.

(SCREAMING)

Did Raven not cast her spell?

Yes. And it worked. Didn't you see how the rats were distracted for a moment?

I cast a distraction spell?

You're only level one. So, well, that's your best spell.

Now your rules are taking the magic out of magic!

(SCREAMING) Ow! Make them stop!

Give me that!

Azarath Metrion Zinthos!

(BLASTING)

(BONES CLANKING)

(GROANING) That was against the rules of the game!

And yet it worked.

I can't believe this. People making up rules, messing up everything.

Ooh! Look! There appears to be a secret passage from where the rats came.

Exciting! You guys feeling it? The adventure?

(THUNDER RUMBLING)

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

♪ A necromancer we're under his spell

♪ Crossing a bridge where the goblins dwell

♪ Skeleton dudes that will make you scream

♪ Nothing in here's quite what it seems

♪ Down in the dungeon

♪ Gotta find the key find the key

♪ Down in the dungeon

♪ Gotta find the key find the key ♪

Ready yourselves. (INHALES)

Who knows what awaits us beyond this door.

(GASPS) Perhaps it is the fairy party!

Oh, sick! All dancing with mermaids and jellyfish massages...

Stop imagining things! Mermaids and fairies are not going to help us find the key!

Now, stand ready.

ALL: A dragon!

(SHUSHING)

(WHISPERING) If this dragon wakes up, it will eat our heads.

Now, follow me. They key to getting us out of here is within our sight.

We're almost clear.

What are you doing?

We wanna ride the dragon!

Just for one tiny minute.

Absolutely not!

Bro, that is a straight-up dragon that we could be riding right now.

Yeah. You said this world was full of magic,

but we ain't done nothing but roll dices and fight rats!

That's the game! And we could be doing that from the comfort of our couch.

But no, you had to use your dumb imaginations and look where that got us!

(SLAMS)

Ooh.

You blame them for being trapped here?

Um, yes. They broke the rules.

(LAUGHING)

-Young elf, it was you who caused this. -What?

You were brought here for ruining this magical game.

(LAUGHING)

Oh, in the face.

Imagination is true magic.

It has no rules. It's so simple, I can't believe you didn't know that.

(LAUGHING)

I wanna ride that dragon!

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

Come ride the dragon with us, bro!

Yes, young elf, come and ride me!

Well, I guess I could give it a try.

I'm riding the dragon! And it's fun!

♪ We're gonna ride the dragon

♪ The dragon

♪ We're gonna ride the dragon

♪ The dragon

♪ We're gonna ride the dragon

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh

♪ The dragon we're gonna ride the dragon ♪

Delightful. Delightful. This is true magic and fantasy.

Congratulations. (LAUGHING)

And now, you fry.

ALL: What?

(FIRE ROARING)