Original subtitles

f Yippee yi-o ki-a f

~ Galloping all the way f

JS Here comes Quick Draw McGraw Sf

[announcer] Kellogg's! The best to you each morning!

From Kellogg's!

f Yippee yi-o ki-a f

~ Galloping all the way f

~ Great big star on his chest f

£ Outdraws all of the rest f

~ Fastest gun in the west f

f Yippee yi-o ki-a f

£ Riding around your way f

JS Here comes Quick Draw McGraw Sf

f The high-falutin'est f

S Fastest shootin'est

~ Cowboy you ever saw f

J That's Quick Draw McGraw Sf

[announcer] Brought to you by...

[upbeat music]

[narrator] Even as the avenging eagle

must return to his nest for rest

so, too, must the lawman, at times, relax his vigil.

Here on his ranch, we find Quick Draw McGraw

the scourge of the outlaw taking time out

from his arduous tasks.

[humming]

-Oh, uh, Mr. Quick Draw? -Yup.

Uh, could you tell us what you're doing?

Practicing my quick draw.

That's where he got his name, Queeks Draw.

Hey, you know somethin’, Baba Looey,

! never thunk about that.

-Uh, Mr. Quick Draw? -Yup.

Uh, are you as quick on the draw as they say?

The best in the West and don't you forget it.

Watch me blast them cans.

[gunshot]

[gunshot]

[gunshot]

Uh, ! zigged when I should have zagged.

Yes, I-/ see.

-Oh, uh, Baba Looey? -Si.

As Quick Draw's partner, uh, could you tell us

which Western bad man gave him the most trouble?

That's easy. Horsesface Harry.

Tell him what a hero l was, Baba Boy.

I'm too modest.

1 don't think you are.

Anyway, one day they send Queeks Draw

to catch Horsesface Harry.

But we don't know what he looks like.

Look yonder, Baba Boy.

What is it, Queeks Draw?

It's a picture of Horseface Harry.

[Baba Looey] Good, now we know what he looks like.

[Quick Draw] Look at that crin-i-mal face!

That low brow!

Those shifty eyes!

That weak chin!

l thin' he looks like you, Queeks Draw.

[Quick Draw] Look at that kind face.

That noble brow!

That strong chin.

Hold on there, strangers. I'm the sheriff.

And I always check upon strangers, strangers.

Especially strange-lookin' strangers.

Everybody knows who I am, sheriff!

It's Horseface Harry!

Horseface Harry? Where's the varmint?

I'm a looking for him.

-[gunfire] -Watch it!

[firing continues]

Crazy mixed-up sheriff.

[Baba Looey] Then Queeks Draw and I high-tailin' out of town

and hided out in this little cabin.

What we didn't know

was that this was Horsesface Harry's hideout.

Wonder how come that sheriff was pot-shoting us?

Maybe he thin’ you look like Horseface, I thin’.

I'll do the thin'in' around here

and don't you forget it.

[horse galloping]

What's that racket?

-[galloping] -Yikes!

[mumbling in Spanish]

It's Horsesface Harry!

Sounds like you said...

[mumbling]

... It's Horsesface Harry!

That's what he said, partner.

Well, I'm arresting you, Horseface.

What do you say to that?

And I'm-a gonna shoot you full of holes.

What do you say to that?

Oh, I'll think of something. Don't rush me.

Queeks Draw does all the thin'in' around here.

[gunshots]

Let's go, Baba Boy!

What do you thin’ we do now, Queeks Draw?

l thin' we keep runnin’. That's what.

[screeching]

1 don't see that stupid Horseface no place.

[gunshot]

Oooh. That smarts.

And this will make you smarter.

[gunshots continue]

Hey, Queeks Draw, wait for me.

What do we do now, Queeks Draw?

! don't know, Baba.

I'll have to use my head and think of somethin’.

That's it, Queeks Draw, use your head.

-Huh? -Confuse him.

Make believe you are Horseface Harry

and make him thin' he is Queeks Draw McGraw.

Then when he turn you in,

we tell the sheriff who is for real.

Gosh! I'm glad ! thought of that.

There's Horseface now. Watch me confuse him.

1 wonder where that McGraw went!

Stick 'em up, McGraw!

Huh? My name is Horseface Harry.

O-o-h, no, it isn't. You are Quick Draw McGraw.

Oh, yes, it is. I'm Horseface Harry.

-Quick Draw McGraw. -I'm Horseface.

-Quick Draw! -Horseface!

-Quick Draw! -Horseface!

For the last time,

I'm Quick Draw McGraw

and do-o-on't you forget it!

Okay, prove it.

Here, put this can on your head.

-Are you ready? -Ready.

Okay. Now, watch this.

[gunshot]

[gunshot]

[gunshot]

1 gotta admit it. You're Quick Draw, alright.

[gun firing]

[screech]

[Quick Draw] Come on and fight like a man, you Horseface!

I'll surprise him with a rear attack.

[gunshot]

Yeow!

It's sneaky, but lots of fun.

[screech]

Gotcha, McGraw!

Huh?

Gotcha, you sickening Western good guy.

! got you, you sick, sick, sick Western bad guy.

And this is the story

of how Queeks Draw catch Horseface Harry.

[narrato] What do you suppose would happen

if Horseface ever broke out of jail?

I'll show you what would happen.

[gunshot]

Heh heh, you thought l was gonna do it again, eh?

No siree Bob.

‘Cause Quick Draw only goofs once.

[gunshot]

l like that Queeks Draw. He's crazy.

Don't you thin’ so?

[theme music]

[upbeat music]

Gosh, Snoop, what's the e-e-emergency?

Search me, Blab, but the man sounded real frantic

on the phone.

Here it is, Blab.

Mammoth Flea Circus.

We must enter.

That's him, alright.

Karl Von Scratchem Bach, Flea Circus producer.

I'm ruined, I'm ruined, I'm ruined! Come in!

I'm ruined, I'm ruined, I tell you, I'm ruined!

Try to decompose yourself, sir.

What happened?

[speaks indistinctly]

Uh, hold it, whilst l review the case.

Read it back, Blab.

I'm sorry, Snoop,

didn't get the vazoopen-snoopen!

Tell us in your own words what happened.

What happened?! Rudolf is geflewden the coopen!

! get it, your star attraction has scrammed.

Ja, little Rudolf has scrambled!

Und I pay five thousand dollars if you bring little Rudolf back!

For that kinda dough, we'll get him back if we have to shave

every dog in town.

Say, Snoop, where do we start looking for a lost flea?

The dog pound, where else?

And here it is!

Gosh, Snoop, there must be a million fleas in there!

-How do we find Rudolf? -Elementary, my dear Blab!

Keep you private eyeball peeled, whilst 1 use some strategy.

Introducing the one, the only,

the world's greatest wonder flea,

none other than Rudolf!

I knew it, Blab. Once a ham, always a ham!

After him, Blab!

Stop, in the name of

the Private Eye Birdwatchers Society!

Pardon me, officer, uh, did you perchance notice

a suspicious-looking flee, fleeing by?

A what? Doing what?

A flea! A-And he's worth five thousand dollars!

Are you guys supposed to be funny?

My dog has lots of fleas, and you can have ‘em all,

for nothin’!

It's him, it's Rudolf!

Listen, smart alecs, the name isn't Rudolf, and beat it,

before I run yous in.

-Let's grab him, Blab! -[officer] Hey!

Ow! What's going on? Stop it I tell you.

I'll have the law on yous!

[bang]

The flea must have fleed, Blab!

Rudolf ain't in his pockets either.

Help! Police!

Help, help!

There he goes, Blab! Keep your eye on him this time!

Tsk tsk tsk!

The people you meet in the park these days.

[toing]

He went that a way, Snoop!

That a way leads to the zoo!

He's going into the monkey cage, Snoop!

This is an emergency!

Hand me them clippers, Blab.

Right, chief!

! don't see him, Blab!

He flew the coop, Snoop!

-[toing] -Uh-oh!

He's heading for the lion's cage!

Folly that flea!

Take these clippers, and get that flea, that's an order!

Right, Chief Super Snooper!

Fantastical, he does anything say.

[lion roars]

[Snooper] I'm disappointed in you, Blab!

When are you gonna learn to folly orders?

-Honest, Snoop, I'm scared! -What's to be scared?

Here's the chance to earn your badge!

The lion's asleep, get in there,

and get Rudolf, the wonder flea!

[Blabber] How do we know Rudolf is still there, Snoop?

[Snooper] He's still there, alright.

Now take this pepper, shake it on the lion,

when Rudolf sneezes, grab him.

Gosh, Snoop! You're the smartest!

That's oblivious.

Go ahead, Blab, sprinkle the pepper.

-A-a-a-a-a! -Get ready to grab him, Blab!

A-A-Achoo!

Gesundheit!

[yawning]

Don't let him wake up, Blab. Sing him a lullaby.

~ Rock-a-bye baby on the tree tops f

Hey, Snoop, get me out of here.

Keep singing for the time being, Blab.

I'll think of something.

~ Rock-a-bye baby on the tree tops f

S When the wind blows f

Easy does it, reach me your hand and I'll have you out of there

in two shakes of a lion's tail.

My hand is safe, Snoop. How about the rest of me?

Hang on, Blabber.

[lion roars]

-Now what do we do, Snoop? -Sing, Blab, what else?

~ Rock-a-bye baby on the tree top f

S When the wind blows The cradle will rock f

~ When the bough breaks f

Gosh, I'm pooped, Snoop.

-l can't sing any more! -Huh, what?

[roars]

Odds Bodkins, Blab, keep singing, that's an order!

Yes, chief!

~ Rock-a-bye baby on the tree top f

S When the wind blows f

~ The cradle will rock f

< When the bough breaks The cradle will fall f

[distorted voice]

[upbeat music]

Oh, yeah? Well, my dear old dad's

as good as your dad any day.

Well, my dad is Rattle Tin Can, the famous TV star.

Is your dad on TV?

-Well, uh-- -ls he?

-Well, he-- -But is he?

-Well, he, uh-- -ls he a big TV star?

Sounds like Augie arguin' with that new neighbor's kid.

Well, go ahead and answer me, smarty pants.

Yeah, you can't

‘cause your dad isn't on TV,

so there.

He is so, and he's a big star, too.

Oh, yeah, well, prove it. When's he on TV?

[Augie] Tonight at 7 o'clock, that's when.

Come on over and see for yourself.

I'll be there. [evil chuckle]

Yeah? And bring your own popcorn, too.

[Doggie Daddy] Oh, Augie.

Yes, dear favorite dad?

Can I see you for a moment, son who's only the greatest.

Comin’, father dear.

Augie boy, I hear we got a big TV star for a neighbor.

Yes, dad, but that's nothing--

And ! also hear that he's got a big TV star

for a neighbor, too, namely me.

How'd you know, dear dad?

And what time, may I ask, do I go on, my son, my son?

Seven o'clock, father of mine.

bet I'll be almost as good as Rattle Tin Can

the big TV star.

-[chuckles] -Better, award-winning dad.

He's a washout compared to you.

Well, imaginative son of mine, take this soap,

and go wash your mouth out for tellin’ such fibs.

But, dad, I'm not fibbin’.

All 1 have to do is take movies of you

and take it to the TV station.

And that's how it easy it is for me to become a TV star?

You could become the idol of millions.

You know, the kid might just have something there,

yes, sir. [chuckles]

He just might have somethin’.

Now, uh, this here's a western, dad, and that dummy

is a bad guy, and he's tryin’ to get away,

and you jump on ‘em...

Pay attention, dad.

! am, director son of mine, am.

Okay, now, quiet.

Action, roll 'em.

Stop, you bad guy hombre.

Now jump on him from your horse, western style.

If you say so, son.

[thud]

Somethin’ is wrong here.

Mighty wrong.

A fire hydrant?

Augie, couldn't you pick a softer bad guy?

I guess you're not the western hero type, dear dad.

You can say that again, my son, my son.

So I'm the jungle hero. Now what, Augie boy?

Ah, this is gonna be easy, brave dad, real easy.

Now you just swing into that open cage over there.

But, Augie, there's a lion in it.

Oh, I didn't notice. Well, anyway, brave dad--

Augie, at this point I'm afraid your brave dad immediately

turns into the worst kind of chicken lizard coward.

But it's safe, chicken dad.

Look, no teeth.

[chuckles] Well, now that's a lion of a different color.

Ready, TV star dad?

Okay, ready, TV producer, director,

and writer son of mine.

Action, roll 'em.

[screams]

Say, that ain't bad.

1 gotta admire myself for that one. [chuckles]

[screams]

[chuckles]

[Doggie Daddy screams]

-[lion roars] -Help, let me out of here!

-Help, help! -[growling]

[bang]

It's amazing what they're doin’ with dentistry these days.

A jungle hero, you're not, no talent dad,

so, this time, you're a tough detective,

and you've got the crook trapped in his hideout.

Which is where, sonny son?

Over there. It's, uh,

just a prop front door, daddy dear.

[Doggie Daddy] Oh, now that looks easy.

And how do! get 'em out, son?

You just bash down the flimsy door, fearless father.

-You ready, poppa? -Ready, Augie boy.

Action, camera, roll 'em.

Alright, Rocky, I'm comin’ in,

you dirty rat.

l, uh, took the hinges off the door

to make it easier for my not-so-strong dad.

Alright, Rocky, I'm comin’ in.

Cut, cut, cut, dear old dad.

Alright, Rocky, you dirty rat,

I'm comin’ in.

[Augie] Cut, dad, cut!

[thud]

Dad, oh, dear dad.

I know, son.

Let's try somethin’ else.

[Augie] Well, we'll try it once more.

Now the whole army is depending on you

to wipe out the enemy with this hand grenade.

But, son of mine, you think it's safe

for a future big TV star to dally dilly with a hand grenade?

It's safe, dad. You pull the pin with your teeth,

and throw the hand grenade.

1 gotcha, son. You can roll 'em when ready.

Ready and rollin’.

Now, let's see, I hold the grenade with me teeth,

pull the pin, and throw it.

Or was it the other way around?

[explosion]

It's not your fault, dad.

Some kids have great TV stars for father,

and some ain't.

1 guess I'm just one of the ain't kids.

No, you're not, Augie, my son,

‘cause, like you promised, your dad will be on TV tonight.

[gunshots]

Gosh, your dad is a great TV star.

I told ya.

Alright, Rocky, I'm comin’ in for you.

[howling]

Gee, do you think your dad'll give me his autograph?

It would be a pleasure, son.

Oh, boy, thanks.

This here's Augie's dad signin’, son.

After all, how many kids can say

their dad's not only on TV, but also in TV.

[laughs]

f Yippee yi-o ki-a f

~ Galloping all the way f

~ There goes Quick Draw McGraw f

[howls]

[announcer] Kellogg's! Your best choice in cereals!

...has brought you...

f Yippee yi-o ki-a f

~ Galloping all the way f

~ Great big star on his chest f

£ Outdraws all of the rest f

~ Fastest gun in the west f

f Yippee yi-o ki-a f

~ Galloping all the way f

~ There goes Quick Draw McGraw f

f The high-falutin'est f

S Fastest shootin'est

~ Cowboy you ever saw f

[Quick Draw McGraw] Hey, Baba Looey, are you alright?

S'awright!