Original subtitles

f Yippee yi-o ki-a f

~ Galloping all the way f

JS Here comes Quick Draw McGraw Sf

[announcer] Kellogg's! The best to you each morning!

From Kellogg's!

f Yippee yi-o ki-a f

~ Galloping all the way f

~ Great big star on his chest f

£ Outdraws all of the rest f

~ Fastest gun in the west f

f Yippee yi-o ki-a f

£ Riding around your way f

JS Here comes Quick Draw McGraw Sf

f The high-falutin'est f

S Fastest shootin'est

~ Cowboy you ever saw f

J That's Quick Draw McGraw Sf

[announcer] Brought to you by...

[upbeat music]

[feel-good music]

There's nothin’ like a picnic

to make for warmer relations between a boy and his dad.

Right, Augie?

[chomping]

[gulps] Yes, Dad.

More dads should try picnic father and son togetherness.

[high-pitched blabbering]

Augie!

[Augie blabbers]

Augie, what's the matter?

Did you eat too much?

No, father of mine.

I'm talking to this ant.

[both chatter indistinctly]

[laughs] I don't know where kids pick up this stuff nowadays.

Hey, what goes on here?

A piece of cake headin’ for the hills.

I'll take that and you can have this.

[bang]

If there's anything l can't stand,

it's a dishonest ant.

Stop, dear father of mine,

my little friend is innocent.

1 gave him the cake.

Will you stop this ant business, Augie,

and step aside while I clobber him again?

No, dear Dad,

he wants to say something.

-[toing] -[ant squealing]

[both chatter indistinctly]

Dad, uh, I think we better pack up and go home.

But why, son?

It ain't rainin’.

[Augie] Rainin’ rain it ain't,

but rainin’ ants it's gonna be, dad of mine.

What kind of double talk is that, my son, my son?

The ants just declared war on you, Daddy.

[laughs] What an imagination that boy has.

Oh please, heed my warning, Father dear,

and listen.

I'm listenin’, favorite son of mine.

I'm listenin’.

[snores]

[chattering]

Charge!

[marching music]

What's that racket, apple of my eye, son of mine?

It's the war, one father in a million,

just like 1 warned you.

For your sake, Father dear, let's go home.

For the last time, I refuse.

! ain't budgin' for no ants.

Hey, what goes on?

How's about that?

They're ant-agonizing me.

Shall we go home now, dear old Dad?

No sir, no sir, Augie,

and I re-reiterate, no.

[marching music]

Hi, fellas.

There goes our picnic, Dad.

Oh no, it don't, son.

Come back here with our picnic.

I'm warnin' you, ants!

Don't ant-agonize me!

[toing]

1 gotcha!

This is ridiculous.

One dog hangin’ onto a string of dogs.

There goes dear old dad, off to the wars.

Why don't you let go, Dad?

Never, Augie boy.

It's the princ-inciple of the thing.

It's my picnic lunch.

And if it's the last thing I do,

I'm gonna get it.

[thud]

Hi, fellas.

[crash]

Hi, dear old Dad.

As one dog to another, halt.

One thing for sure, my dear dad's not a quitter.

[chattering]

Tripped me, huh?

[laughs mockingly]

If there's one thing l can't stand,

it's a laughin’ ant.

-[marching music] -Now what?

Big Daddy... [chomps] why don't you surrender?

Offspring of mine,

your daddy has just begun to fight.

Halt! Return that watermelon, you insects!

[screeching]

If l wasn't so mad,

! could almost admire them little ants,

climbin' a tree with a big watermelon.

Oh, here comes an apple-eatin' ant.

Like they say, "an apple a day keeps the ants away."

That's one down and only a million to go.

Oh, oh, oh, I forgot about the watermelon!

[thud]

Dad, don't you think--

Yes, son, yeah, 1 surrender.

Tell them ants to call off the war.

Okay, dear Dad, who knows when he's beat.

[both chattering]

What's he sayin’ there, Augie?

He says he accepts your apology.

Just don't let it happen again.

Now how do you like that?

Oh well, after all, how many daddies can say,

"That's my boy who talks to ants"?

[upbeat music]

[narrator] /n the wild and woolly West of old,

new towns sprang up overnight.

And, as in most Western towns,

the biggest challenge of all was,

who's the fastest gun alive?

I'm the fastest gun alive!

You're not, I am!

Nuh-uh, ! am!

-l am! -l am!

! am!

[gunshot]

Looks like a tie.

[narrator] Cash rewards attracted

quick-triggered bounty hunters,

such as Quick Draw McGraw, the real fastest gun alive.

Uh, Mr. Quick Draw?

Yup. It's not much of a line,

but, heh, it's the way l read it.

Would you show us your famous quick draw, Quick Draw?

Yep, there's nothing to it.

just toss this tin can up in the air,

whip out the six-gun, and...

-Oh! -[gunshot]

Shucks. ! had the bullet in backwards.

-Huh! -[toing]

[narrator] Side by side with Quick Draw McGraw

was his faithful friend and admirer, Baba Looey.

l think maybe we go back to herding sheep.

Don’ you thin' so, Queeks Draw?

No, ! don't thin’ so, Queeks Draw.

I'ma gonna clean up this one-horse town.

Let me see here.

This is a easy one, Senor Queeks Draw.

"Reward. Fancy-Foot Finnegan

wanted for square dancing in a round house."

Hold on, Baba Looey. We hit the jackpot.

"Five thousand dollars reward for the capture

“of the well-known pole cat, Grumble-weed.

P.S. We give green stamps."

Are you loco? Senor Grumble will kill you to pieces.

Then I'll throw the pieces to the coyotes, tenderfoot.

Whom's a tenderfoot?

-You are. -[gunshots]

Ooh! Ouch! Ow! Ooh! Ow! Ow!

What'd you say, Queeks Draw?

1 said, "Ooh! Ouch! Ow! Ooh! Ow! Ow! Gosh! Ow! Ow!"

[gunshots]

Help! Grumble-weed's done robbed the bank!

-Ain't that against the law? -Right.

Any objections, horseface?

Can't think of none offhand.

Well, while you're thinking,

1 dare you to step over this line.

Okay.

-Now, step over this one. -Okay.

-Now, this one. -Okay.

-And this one. -Uh-oh.

[thud]

Ta-ta, tenderfoot. Har, har, har.

Yoo-hoo, Queeks Draw,

don't you thin' we better give up the whole thin'?

Nope. I'm still gonna clean up this one-horse town.

Leave us face it.

I'm a western delinquent.

You gonna surprise Senor Grumbles-weed?

Yep. This'll rock old Grumbles to sleep.

Uh-oh. Whoa, horsey!

Wait here, my pinto pal.

[thud]

-[bang] -[toing]

Pardon my glove.

[thud]

What happened, Queeks Draw?

How do ! know? just got here.

[snoring]

Old Grumble-weed's sound asleep.

Now's my chance.

I'ma gonna pin him to that tree

with my William Tell do-it-yourself kit.

-With a bows and arrows? -Yep.

Here, Baba Looey, put this apple on his noggin.

-ls this okay? -Yep.

I'm a terrible shot.

If l aim at the apple, I'm bound to hit old Grumble-weed.

[Baba Looey] Queeks Draw, you didn't let go!

It's old horseface again.

There goes Grumbles-weed.

Har, har, and double har.

Do you thin’ this trick will work, Queeks Draw?

How can! miss with four guns?

It ain't easy, amigo.

Take cover, Baba Looey. Here comes old Grumbles-weed.

-Hold thar, horsey! -[screeching]

Looks like a Quick Draw McGraw type booby trap up ahead.

[chuckles] This will flip old Quick Draw.

-Ready. Aim. -Fire!

[gunshot]

Grumble-weed, I've had enough of your treacherous tricks.

You and me are gonna have a showdown at sundown.

And do-o-on't you forget it!

We'll take ten steps, turn, and fire.

l seen 'em do this in a western movie once.

The hero always wins.

Ready... one... two... three...

four... five... SIX...

seven... eight... nine... ten!

Turn and fire!

-Like this? -[gunshot]

I'm giving you one more chance, Grumble-weed!

Now play it fair and square.

Okay, let me do the counting this time.

I've seen that same movie. Ready?

One, two, four,

six, eight, ten, ten.

Turn and fire!

[explosion]

[Grumble-weed shouts indistinctly]

[Baba Looey] You gotta admit one thing.

Queeks Draw is a man of his word.

Meet Queeks Draw McGraw,

the fastest broom alive!

1 said ! was gonna clean up this one-horse town,

and I'ma gonna.

[happy music]

[narrator] This is a true case.

Only the characters are ridiculous.

It began the night Super Snooper,

and Blabber Mouse,

the world's greatest detectives,

were hired to guard

the world's largest diamond,

the King Size.

Now hear this, Blabber Mouse,

whilst we guard this priceless chunk of ice,

either neither of us eats or sleeps.

Do you hear this?

! hear you, oh, world's greatest detective,

with whom I am so proud to be associated whom with,

and hope some day to be even half as good a snooper as...

We must face it, this kid will go far.

[narrator] Although Snooper and his faithful assistant,

Blabber Mouse, were determined to guard

this fabulous King Size diamond,

as equally determined to steal it

was the notorious international diamond thief,

listed in police files as Light Fingers Francois.

In person.

Ah, this will be my greatest caper to date.

Observe, s'il vous plait.

Every one knows a doggie is man's best friend, n'est pas?

And who would know that this innocent looking bone

is a perfect hideout for the King Size diamond.

I'll soften those private eyes with my soulful eyes routine,

and I'm in, voila! Watch.

Bow wow! Bow wow! Wow wow wow!

Hey, Snoop! Look, it's a dog!

-[whimpers] -Here, boy!

[whistles]

He likes me, Snoop!

Can I keep him, Snoop, huh, can 1?

He can help us guard the diamond! Huh, huh, please?

Hmm, maybe havin’ a private eye dog assistant

ain't a bad idea at that, Blab!

Bow wow!

Hey, look at that, Snoop!

He's a genuine watch dog!

[Snooper] Yeah, he's a real facsimile of one.

Okay, pooch, take over whilst my partner and I

partake of a snack-type lunch!

Bow wow!

We'll be back after our snack, Jackson.

This is So easy, it is sickening!

Dum-dum-de-dum-dum. [chuckles]

Light Fingers strikes again!

Maybe the pooch would like a snack, too.

Huh? Hey, Snoop! Look!

The dog has got the diamond, and it's putting it in the bone!

Dummy private eye doubts the vera-ci-city

of what it sees. You're right, Blab!

Hey, you pilfering pooch, unhand over that bone!

Uh-oh! The jig is up!

Follow that dog!

Here, pooch! Here, pooch!

Here is mud in your private eye!

Au revoir! Ha-ha-ha-ha!

Hey! That dog is Light Fingers Francois!

Yeah, Blab, there's skulldoggery afoot.

Come back here, you crooked thieving dogsclaw you!

Finders keepers, losers weepers!

-Cry your eyes out. -[bang]

[bang]

Sorry, mon ami, but that is mine!

-Nice doggie, nice doggie! -[growls]

Here comes the diamond, Blab!

1 got it, Blab!

-[dog growls] -Yikes!

Nice doggie, nice doggie, ni--

Like I have said, that is my bone!

-Merci! -[growls]

Stop, in the name of the Ajax Private Eye School!

Nice doggie, nice doggie...

Hold it!

Fetch the stick!

[barks]

Hand over the diamond, Light Fingers,

or you'll fetch a mouth full of knuckles!

Fetch the stick!

[Snooper grunts]

Leave us to admit it, bow wow, we goofed.

Au revoir, goofers!

Maybe I'll get my badge for this.

Hand it over, Light Fingers!

Hey! Give me back my bone, you crooks!

[Blabber] Phooey to you, eh, Louie!

Try and get it!

All right, you have asked for it!

[bang]

What is the matter, detective?

You all shook up? Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Merci beaucoup!

Hey, what's this?

Just call me Shaky.

Snakey is better, you jewel thief!

Stop in the name of

the International Jewel Thief Association!

Uh-oh!

-[growls] -Uh, fetch a stick?

You fetch it!

! will fetch the bone!

Huh?

[growls]

Francois, you have done it again!

Gotcha, mutt!

The real dog's got the bone, Snoop!

Like I said, Blab, follow the real dog!

How do you like that, no dog license, no nothing!

I'm taking you in, mutt!

[in French accent] My dear old mama always Say,

"Francois, Someday you will go to the dogs!"

For the last time, bowser,

please, please tell us where you buried the bone,

there's diamond in it!

Please tell us!

Mm-mm-mm-mm!

-Hey, Blab! -Yeah, Snoop?

He won't talk!

Keep digging, I'll Keep grilling him!

Please, will you tell us where you buried it, huh?

Pretty please with sugar on it,

strawberries in season?

Will you please tell us where you buried it?

Please!

f Yippee yi-o ki-a f

~ Galloping all the way f

~ There goes Quick Draw McGraw f

[howls]

[announcer] Kellogg's! Your best choice in cereals!

...has brought you...

f Yippee yi-o ki-a f

~ Galloping all the way f

~ Great big star on his chest f

£ Outdraws all of the rest f

~ Fastest gun in the west f

f Yippee yi-o ki-a f

~ Galloping all the way f

~ There goes Quick Draw McGraw f

f The high-falutin'est f

S Fastest shootin'est

~ Cowboy you ever saw f

[Quick Draw McGraw] Hey, Baba Looey, are you alright?

S'awright!