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1
00:00:00,723 --> 00:00:03,672
Buttons!
It's yummy yum, yum time.
2
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Buttons!
3
00:00:08,098 --> 00:00:10,200
Look what mumsie's made
4
00:00:10,231 --> 00:00:13,817
for her very special Buttons -
5
00:00:13,837 --> 00:00:16,473
fresh catfish supreme.
6
00:00:17,741 --> 00:00:20,377
Don't you like your dinny din dins?
7
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Buttons?
8
00:00:25,779 --> 00:00:31,013
Resync: Xenzai[NEF]
9
00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:36,228
Oh,
10
00:00:36,661 --> 00:00:38,230
oh Buttons!
11
00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:43,368
Oh Buttons,
12
00:00:43,568 --> 00:00:47,974
Buttons - is there something wrong
with my poor little pussy?
13
00:01:54,245 --> 00:01:56,347
Lexx 4.04
Stan Down
14
00:02:09,161 --> 00:02:11,598
Are you a man or a jellyfish?
15
00:02:12,799 --> 00:02:14,524
- What, sweetie?
- Are you a man,
16
00:02:14,559 --> 00:02:16,249
or a spineless gutless jellyfish
17
00:02:16,269 --> 00:02:18,438
with no backbone whatsoever?
18
00:02:20,707 --> 00:02:22,255
Er - I'm a man.
19
00:02:22,275 --> 00:02:25,246
You're a jellyfish. You take
orders from Prince,
20
00:02:25,679 --> 00:02:29,582
and why the head of the Bureau of
Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms
21
00:02:29,617 --> 00:02:32,887
should tell the President of the
United States what to do is beyond me.
22
00:02:32,922 --> 00:02:35,489
You're nothing but a snivelling
dog, Reggie.
23
00:02:35,524 --> 00:02:37,709
- Woof!
- You give the orders,
24
00:02:37,744 --> 00:02:39,860
not Isambard Prince - and he,
25
00:02:39,895 --> 00:02:42,130
and everyone else, has to follow them.
26
00:02:42,564 --> 00:02:44,566
You really think that's possible?
27
00:02:44,601 --> 00:02:46,568
Yes you moron, you're the President!
28
00:02:47,035 --> 00:02:48,504
That's right, I am.
29
00:02:48,539 --> 00:02:49,605
If you want,
30
00:02:49,705 --> 00:02:51,174
you can get rid of Prince -
31
00:02:52,008 --> 00:02:54,410
then you don't have to take
orders from him again.
32
00:02:55,445 --> 00:02:57,113
- You're right.
- Always.
33
00:02:58,014 --> 00:02:59,449
But how can I get rid of him?
34
00:02:59,715 --> 00:03:02,686
Anyway you want, Mr President.
35
00:03:13,298 --> 00:03:15,967
Your country has an important
mission for you
36
00:03:27,813 --> 00:03:30,950
- Are we there yet?
- Not yet, sweetie pie.
37
00:03:30,985 --> 00:03:32,583
When are we gonna get there?!
38
00:03:32,618 --> 00:03:35,020
We'll get there when we get
there, pumpkin.
39
00:03:35,055 --> 00:03:37,388
I wanna go to the alligator pit,
right now.
40
00:03:37,423 --> 00:03:39,826
Mommy and daddy have promised
that you can, sweetie.
41
00:03:39,861 --> 00:03:41,962
The alligator pit! The alligator pit!
42
00:03:41,997 --> 00:03:44,064
We have to get there first, sugar
43
00:03:44,264 --> 00:03:45,799
I'm hungry.
44
00:03:46,633 --> 00:03:47,666
I hate those.
45
00:03:47,701 --> 00:03:49,736
- Oh, you love them.
- I hate those!
46
00:03:50,938 --> 00:03:53,508
And I want to shoot something.
47
00:04:12,528 --> 00:04:14,530
Oh, oh! -
48
00:04:17,467 --> 00:04:20,170
oh, why can't this just be a dream?
49
00:04:20,737 --> 00:04:23,706
Why can't I just wake up in
my own bed on the Lexx?
50
00:04:23,741 --> 00:04:25,809
This definitely is not my bed.
51
00:04:28,112 --> 00:04:29,145
Mr President.
52
00:04:29,180 --> 00:04:31,013
I'd like to have a word with
prisoner Tweedle
53
00:04:31,048 --> 00:04:33,917
Sir, I don't know if you have the
proper clearance for that here.
54
00:04:33,952 --> 00:04:36,787
Look here, I'm the President, I can
do what I want, now leave me
55
00:04:36,822 --> 00:04:37,988
Yes sir
56
00:04:47,466 --> 00:04:48,867
Go, get out of here!
57
00:05:05,152 --> 00:05:06,987
Stanley Tweedle -
58
00:05:07,488 --> 00:05:09,923
we have something in common,
you and I.
59
00:05:09,958 --> 00:05:10,823
What?
60
00:05:10,858 --> 00:05:13,160
Our strong feelings about
Isambard Prince.
61
00:05:13,961 --> 00:05:16,463
Oh yeah, I got some strong
feelings about him.
62
00:05:16,764 --> 00:05:19,000
They're not the same ones you have!
63
00:05:19,035 --> 00:05:20,900
Perhaps they are.
64
00:05:20,935 --> 00:05:23,788
I feel strongly that this planet
would be a better
65
00:05:23,823 --> 00:05:26,641
place as far as both you and
I were concerned if
66
00:05:26,676 --> 00:05:30,144
Prince were, er - no longer here.
67
00:05:30,179 --> 00:05:33,249
- What?
- Let me ask you, Captain Tweedle -
68
00:05:33,883 --> 00:05:36,986
- you don't mind if I call you that?
- At, no, no.
69
00:05:37,052 --> 00:05:40,389
Captain Tweedle, could you
use the Lexx to,
70
00:05:40,689 --> 00:05:42,392
er - destroy Prince?
71
00:05:44,194 --> 00:05:45,729
Yeah, I think so.
72
00:05:46,296 --> 00:05:49,299
But if I do, what's in it for me?
73
00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:52,602
I'll make you a - a king.
74
00:05:52,836 --> 00:05:54,972
What, king of the whole planet?
75
00:05:55,007 --> 00:05:57,108
Oo, no, not the whole planet.
76
00:05:57,542 --> 00:06:00,178
But you could rule your
own country, mmm -
77
00:06:00,745 --> 00:06:01,778
that!
78
00:06:01,813 --> 00:06:04,148
That great big island.
79
00:06:04,515 --> 00:06:05,716
You can be king of
80
00:06:05,751 --> 00:06:07,419
Newfoundland.
81
00:06:07,454 --> 00:06:09,088
What's it like?
82
00:06:09,621 --> 00:06:12,189
It's paradise. A beautiful island
83
00:06:12,224 --> 00:06:15,094
paradise of wine, women and
constant song.
84
00:06:15,260 --> 00:06:17,362
Big sunny gardens, all year round.
85
00:06:17,429 --> 00:06:19,365
What are the women like?
86
00:06:20,300 --> 00:06:23,837
Not very picky if you know
what I mean.
87
00:06:26,573 --> 00:06:30,376
King of New - New - what?
88
00:06:30,477 --> 00:06:32,411
Newfoundland.
89
00:06:32,446 --> 00:06:35,716
King of Newfoundland, huh?
90
00:07:05,681 --> 00:07:07,016
So how do we find Stan?
91
00:07:07,917 --> 00:07:10,854
Excuse me. I am looking for
Stanley Tweedle.
92
00:07:10,889 --> 00:07:13,791
He is in this city. How would
I find him?
93
00:07:14,291 --> 00:07:15,859
Better get yourself a new hairdo,
94
00:07:15,993 --> 00:07:18,028
freako Hey, baby
95
00:07:18,362 --> 00:07:20,597
Outta my way, bunhead!
96
00:07:25,570 --> 00:07:27,539
Who is in charge of this city?
97
00:07:27,806 --> 00:07:29,874
The President. In the White House.
98
00:07:30,842 --> 00:07:32,110
Pennsylvania Avenue.
99
00:07:32,510 --> 00:07:33,611
Thank you.
100
00:07:34,547 --> 00:07:36,649
Nice work - bunhead.
101
00:07:39,418 --> 00:07:42,688
So, this makes me King of, er -
102
00:07:43,456 --> 00:07:45,823
Newfoundland, yes.
103
00:07:45,858 --> 00:07:48,995
By my supreme executive authority,
104
00:07:49,030 --> 00:07:50,897
I invest you as the king
105
00:07:51,198 --> 00:07:52,232
Excellent.
106
00:07:52,365 --> 00:07:54,067
I'll call you as soon as we get
back to the Lexx.
107
00:07:54,102 --> 00:07:55,734
- How?
- Oh, we're much
108
00:07:55,769 --> 00:07:57,938
more advanced than you are.
I can call
109
00:07:57,973 --> 00:07:59,774
- right to your desk.
- Good.
110
00:07:59,809 --> 00:08:01,541
And I'll find out where Prince is.
111
00:08:01,576 --> 00:08:05,246
- Find out exactly where.
- exactly, yes.
112
00:08:05,281 --> 00:08:07,448
Time to close the book on Prince.
113
00:08:34,077 --> 00:08:35,245
Look!
114
00:08:48,693 --> 00:08:49,961
Gimmee a ride?
115
00:08:50,529 --> 00:08:52,164
Hold on tight.
116
00:08:58,970 --> 00:09:01,040
You're sure it was the President?
117
00:09:01,340 --> 00:09:02,373
Yes sir.
118
00:09:02,408 --> 00:09:05,745
And what exactly were he and
Stanley Tweedle talking about?
119
00:09:06,679 --> 00:09:08,214
We don't know sir.
120
00:09:08,714 --> 00:09:09,747
Why not?
121
00:09:09,782 --> 00:09:11,717
He asked us to leave the chamber.
122
00:09:12,718 --> 00:09:14,019
Well why didn't you come up here?
123
00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:16,457
We - didn't know that was
allowed, sir.
124
00:09:16,557 --> 00:09:18,592
Well the next time that Stanley
Tweedle and the President
125
00:09:18,627 --> 00:09:20,292
have a little chit chat,
126
00:09:20,327 --> 00:09:22,429
you have my permission to come
into this office.
127
00:09:22,763 --> 00:09:24,531
You can hear them quite
well from here.
128
00:09:24,565 --> 00:09:26,801
- Yes sir.
- Thank you.
129
00:09:31,473 --> 00:09:33,341
This just in -
130
00:09:33,475 --> 00:09:35,442
the Sacred College of Cardinals
131
00:09:35,477 --> 00:09:38,914
of the Catholic Church have
finally chosen a new Pope.
132
00:09:39,515 --> 00:09:42,117
Although it's not a requirement
of canon law, the
133
00:09:42,152 --> 00:09:44,685
college normally elects one of
its own members
134
00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:47,757
as leader of the world's more
than one billion Catholics.
135
00:09:48,557 --> 00:09:51,394
But in a surprise break from
tradition,
136
00:09:51,628 --> 00:09:53,330
they've made a -
137
00:09:53,597 --> 00:09:56,366
real estate agent from Miami,
138
00:09:56,833 --> 00:09:58,767
Genevieve G Rota,
139
00:09:58,802 --> 00:10:02,372
the new Holy Father of the
Catholic Church.
140
00:10:02,407 --> 00:10:06,077
I'm His Holiness? I'm the
Holy Father?
141
00:10:06,978 --> 00:10:08,880
I'm the Pope! Oh my goodness!
142
00:10:09,013 --> 00:10:11,098
I'm the Pope, I can't believe it.
143
00:10:11,133 --> 00:10:13,184
I'm the Pope, it ain't no joke,
144
00:10:13,219 --> 00:10:15,285
everybody, I'm the Pope!
145
00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:18,157
I'm the Pope. I ain't no dope.
I offer hope -
146
00:10:18,192 --> 00:10:20,443
wine, wafers and water and wine.
147
00:10:20,478 --> 00:10:22,659
Kiss my ring and cross my heart!
148
00:10:22,694 --> 00:10:24,730
We were deadlocked for a week,
between the Cardinal
149
00:10:24,765 --> 00:10:26,663
of Valencia and the Cardinal
of Milan.
150
00:10:26,698 --> 00:10:29,635
It was getting so acrimonious,
we decided to pick
151
00:10:29,670 --> 00:10:32,572
a compromise candidate at random
from the newspaper.
152
00:10:33,239 --> 00:10:35,858
Once conclave begins, no
communication is allowed
153
00:10:35,893 --> 00:10:38,478
with the outside world, and the
only newspaper we had
154
00:10:38,513 --> 00:10:41,749
was the real estate section
of the Miami Herald.
155
00:10:41,784 --> 00:10:44,251
We chose Genevieve because
her name has
156
00:10:44,286 --> 00:10:46,253
a nice Catholic ring to it.
157
00:10:52,193 --> 00:10:54,463
Isambard Prince, for the President
158
00:10:55,030 --> 00:10:58,100
I'm sorry sir. The President's,
er - away
159
00:10:58,433 --> 00:11:00,218
Away, where?
160
00:11:00,253 --> 00:11:02,003
Just - away. sir
161
00:11:02,737 --> 00:11:05,641
The President didn't tell me
that he was going away
162
00:11:06,175 --> 00:11:08,177
Would you like to leave a message?
163
00:11:38,343 --> 00:11:41,713
"We're going to Orlando
this year, I promise".
164
00:11:42,681 --> 00:11:43,849
That's what you said.
165
00:11:44,183 --> 00:11:45,751
Your exact words.
166
00:11:45,985 --> 00:11:48,254
I assumed that meant that you
wanted to go.
167
00:11:49,054 --> 00:11:51,423
You said we were going to
go last year -
168
00:11:51,458 --> 00:11:53,793
of course, we didn't go
anywhere last year.
169
00:11:53,859 --> 00:11:55,462
You said we were gonna go
the year before -
170
00:11:55,796 --> 00:11:57,230
and the year before that.
171
00:11:57,464 --> 00:11:59,666
Each time you had a reason why
you couldn't.
172
00:12:00,267 --> 00:12:02,736
You always have a reason why
you can't do anything.
173
00:12:02,771 --> 00:12:04,838
The alligator pit!
The alligator pit!
174
00:12:04,873 --> 00:12:06,405
We're almost there, lambikins.
175
00:12:06,440 --> 00:12:08,241
The alligator pit!
The alligator pit!
176
00:12:08,276 --> 00:12:11,145
Look, we all want to get to
the alligator pit, sweetheart.
177
00:12:11,679 --> 00:12:13,431
That is, as long as your
father doesn't
178
00:12:13,466 --> 00:12:15,183
screw up this time, like
he always does.
179
00:12:26,028 --> 00:12:27,362
That's your plan?
180
00:12:28,464 --> 00:12:30,599
That's the dumbest thing
I've ever heard.
181
00:12:31,233 --> 00:12:33,619
No, sweetie - Captain Tweedle
says his
182
00:12:33,654 --> 00:12:35,747
spaceship can fire a tiny
little beam,
183
00:12:35,782 --> 00:12:37,841
- at precisely -
- And you believed him?
184
00:12:37,876 --> 00:12:39,040
Well, yes
185
00:12:39,075 --> 00:12:40,275
You know, I knew you were
dumb Reggie,
186
00:12:40,310 --> 00:12:42,979
but I had no idea you were
actually retarded.
187
00:12:43,213 --> 00:12:45,549
How are you going to
pinpoint Prince?
188
00:12:45,749 --> 00:12:48,119
Is he gonna go around telling
you precisely where he is?
189
00:12:52,022 --> 00:12:54,458
Yeah? It's Prince!
190
00:12:55,192 --> 00:12:58,446
Isambard - how are you?
And where are you?
191
00:12:58,481 --> 00:13:01,700
I just called to tell you
I'm in Miami,
192
00:13:01,735 --> 00:13:03,301
for a couple of days,
193
00:13:03,635 --> 00:13:06,269
to meet with some Cuban hit men.
194
00:13:06,304 --> 00:13:08,808
Er, good, good, fine, fine.
He's gone to Miami!
195
00:13:09,542 --> 00:13:12,376
So, where in Miami are you, exactly?
196
00:13:12,411 --> 00:13:14,847
My meeting's taking place
in a small yacht,
197
00:13:15,081 --> 00:13:17,850
about two miles off South Beach -
198
00:13:18,117 --> 00:13:20,586
- why?
- Er, Isambard, I've got to go.
199
00:13:20,686 --> 00:13:22,055
Call me back.
200
00:13:23,390 --> 00:13:25,526
- Find a map.
- This is crazy
201
00:13:25,561 --> 00:13:26,860
No it's not!
202
00:13:31,598 --> 00:13:33,033
It'll never work
203
00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:35,870
America, America - there.
204
00:13:37,272 --> 00:13:39,439
There it is. Miami.
205
00:13:39,474 --> 00:13:41,509
It's right there on that land that
sticks out.
206
00:13:41,976 --> 00:13:44,479
That land that sticks out is
called Florida.
207
00:13:45,513 --> 00:13:47,583
You don't know that, war hero?
208
00:13:48,484 --> 00:13:50,453
Oo - well,
209
00:13:51,921 --> 00:13:54,290
thirty years in the jungle
causes you to forget -
210
00:13:57,259 --> 00:13:58,462
things.
211
00:14:11,409 --> 00:14:14,312
- 790.
- Kai-o-licious!
212
00:14:17,515 --> 00:14:18,548
Lexx, what was that?
213
00:14:18,583 --> 00:14:21,486
A communication signal, Stanley.
214
00:14:21,521 --> 00:14:23,222
Well -
215
00:14:23,755 --> 00:14:25,522
connect us!
216
00:14:25,557 --> 00:14:27,960
As you command, Stan.
217
00:14:28,293 --> 00:14:30,762
Stanley? Captain Tweedle,
218
00:14:30,863 --> 00:14:32,965
- is that you?
- Yes, yeah, it's me.
219
00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:34,865
Prince is on a boat off Miami.
220
00:14:34,900 --> 00:14:36,469
He promised to call back soon
with his exact
221
00:14:36,504 --> 00:14:38,705
precise location, are you listening?
222
00:14:38,740 --> 00:14:40,907
- Yeah, yeah, I'm listening.
- OK.
223
00:14:46,746 --> 00:14:48,647
- Prince?
- Yes?
224
00:14:48,682 --> 00:14:51,685
Are you still there, where you are?
On a boat?
225
00:14:51,752 --> 00:14:53,419
Yes, I'm still here.
226
00:14:53,454 --> 00:14:55,890
Oh, sorry about that, I was
on the other line.
227
00:14:55,925 --> 00:14:57,858
I'm off the coast of Florida - that's
228
00:14:58,159 --> 00:15:00,929
the bit that sticks out at the bottom
right hand corner of the United States
229
00:15:01,096 --> 00:15:02,295
Off Miami, right?
230
00:15:02,330 --> 00:15:05,267
Yes, I'm in a small boat
off South Beach.
231
00:15:05,433 --> 00:15:07,634
Mmm. Could -
232
00:15:07,669 --> 00:15:10,038
could you say exactly how far off?
233
00:15:10,505 --> 00:15:11,538
Why?
234
00:15:11,573 --> 00:15:13,775
Well, er, I,
235
00:15:13,810 --> 00:15:16,729
I just like to know exactly
where my trusty old
236
00:15:16,764 --> 00:15:19,649
number two man - I mean,
number one man, is.
237
00:15:20,183 --> 00:15:21,350
I see.
238
00:15:21,617 --> 00:15:24,153
Well, just, just give me
a moment here please.
239
00:15:27,791 --> 00:15:31,195
My exact position is 25 degrees
45 minutes north,
240
00:15:31,328 --> 00:15:34,598
by 80 degrees 16 minutes west.
Did you get that?
241
00:15:34,898 --> 00:15:37,702
Oh, I am sorry -
242
00:15:38,636 --> 00:15:40,205
could you repeat that?
243
00:15:40,505 --> 00:15:43,575
25 degrees 45 minutes north,
244
00:15:43,708 --> 00:15:47,112
by 80 degrees 16 minutes west.
245
00:15:47,212 --> 00:15:50,349
- Thank you, Isambard.
- It's my pleasure.
246
00:15:50,850 --> 00:15:53,119
Now, what was it that you were
calling about?
247
00:15:53,352 --> 00:15:56,489
= Oh, it's the Cubans, sir.
- The Cubans, hmm, I see.
248
00:15:56,856 --> 00:15:58,622
Yes, the Miami Cubans.
249
00:15:58,657 --> 00:16:01,360
I'm arranging for them to take care
of a little problem for me.
250
00:16:02,461 --> 00:16:05,565
Mm, I see, good, good, fine, fine.
251
00:16:06,867 --> 00:16:09,603
It's the type of problem they're
quite experienced with,
252
00:16:09,638 --> 00:16:12,072
so I won't bore you with the
details just now.
253
00:16:12,105 --> 00:16:15,009
Yes, you handle it. You are my
number one.
254
00:16:15,044 --> 00:16:17,245
- Well, bye, bye Isambard.
- Bye, bye
255
00:16:17,845 --> 00:16:18,845
Did you get all that?
256
00:16:18,880 --> 00:16:21,115
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I got it.
257
00:16:23,618 --> 00:16:25,620
And what do you think?
258
00:16:25,987 --> 00:16:28,657
I think you should have rotted in
the jungles of Vietnam,
259
00:16:29,024 --> 00:16:31,660
and I should have married
Dr Schnapsklapper.
260
00:16:37,966 --> 00:16:40,537
OK Lexx - I want you to fire
261
00:16:41,171 --> 00:16:43,004
a tiny beam,
262
00:16:43,039 --> 00:16:47,075
at a teeny weeny tiny target.
263
00:16:47,110 --> 00:16:50,413
I will always do as you command,
captain.
264
00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:52,248
Good. OK Lexx -
265
00:16:52,283 --> 00:16:54,385
I want you to fire your weapon -
266
00:16:54,420 --> 00:16:56,554
Stan! What are you doing?
267
00:16:56,821 --> 00:16:58,821
Now Xev, look, I know
268
00:16:58,856 --> 00:17:01,709
that you think that sometimes
I make really stupid decisions,
269
00:17:01,744 --> 00:17:04,563
and I admit, once or twice in the
past, maybe I coulda done
270
00:17:04,598 --> 00:17:07,164
things a bit better, but trust me
on this one.
271
00:17:07,199 --> 00:17:10,335
What I am doing is for the greater
good of everybody.
272
00:17:10,370 --> 00:17:11,935
Do you mind if I ask how?
273
00:17:11,970 --> 00:17:14,339
And what exactly you have in
mind then?
274
00:17:14,374 --> 00:17:16,373
I'm gonna get the Lexx to fire
275
00:17:16,408 --> 00:17:20,880
a tiny thin beam at a precise
spot on that planet,
276
00:17:20,915 --> 00:17:24,050
and then no more Prince.
277
00:17:24,117 --> 00:17:25,451
Do you think the Lexx can do that?
278
00:17:25,651 --> 00:17:28,604
Xev, look, we did some target
practice a little while ago,
279
00:17:28,639 --> 00:17:31,558
and the Lexx fired a tiny beam
at a little object that was -
280
00:17:31,959 --> 00:17:34,795
really, really far away, so
this should be easy.
281
00:17:34,962 --> 00:17:39,066
- Right, Lexx?
- I will do as you command, Stan.
282
00:17:40,067 --> 00:17:41,467
I don't know, Stan.
283
00:17:41,502 --> 00:17:44,672
Oh, come on Xev! The Lexx and I
are really good together.
284
00:17:44,707 --> 00:17:46,873
Oh, sure you are! What if it
doesn't work?
285
00:17:46,908 --> 00:17:49,644
Then you'll end up killing thousands
and thousands of innocent people.
286
00:17:50,211 --> 00:17:52,113
Look Xev - the only chance
287
00:17:52,347 --> 00:17:55,050
that entire planet has is with
Prince out of the way,
288
00:17:55,085 --> 00:17:56,383
now you know that's true.
289
00:17:56,418 --> 00:18:00,289
Are you sure it is possible to kill
Prince in the conventional sense?
290
00:18:00,356 --> 00:18:01,288
You mean,
291
00:18:01,323 --> 00:18:04,360
after he's dead, he might be able
to come back, like he did on Fire?
292
00:18:05,294 --> 00:18:08,865
- Yes.
- Yeah, but we don't know for sure!
293
00:18:09,132 --> 00:18:10,934
We shouldn't miss this chance.
294
00:18:12,235 --> 00:18:14,204
Besides, I'm the captain
of this ship,
295
00:18:14,604 --> 00:18:16,907
and I hereby declare by my -
296
00:18:17,474 --> 00:18:19,610
supreme executive authority,
297
00:18:19,677 --> 00:18:22,647
that we are gonna blow up Prince,
the ultimate embodiment
298
00:18:22,682 --> 00:18:25,148
of evil, who we know - right now -
299
00:18:25,183 --> 00:18:27,685
is on a little boat off the
coast of Miami, Florida -
300
00:18:27,720 --> 00:18:29,921
therefore making this planet a
much better place
301
00:18:29,956 --> 00:18:32,624
for me, for you, for everybody!
302
00:18:32,758 --> 00:18:33,992
Now Lexx -
303
00:18:34,793 --> 00:18:37,396
you see that bit that
sticks out there?
304
00:18:37,863 --> 00:18:39,463
Yes, Stan.
305
00:18:39,498 --> 00:18:42,401
- Are you aimed at it?
- Yes, Stan.
306
00:18:42,436 --> 00:18:44,637
Good. OK Lexx -
307
00:18:44,771 --> 00:18:48,708
I want you to fire
a tiny thin beam,
308
00:18:49,409 --> 00:18:50,677
at -
309
00:18:51,177 --> 00:18:54,814
28 degrees by
310
00:18:55,415 --> 00:18:57,952
45 minutes north,
311
00:18:58,786 --> 00:19:02,156
by 81 degrees
312
00:19:03,290 --> 00:19:06,560
point 15 minutes west.
313
00:19:06,727 --> 00:19:09,064
As you command, Stan.
314
00:19:44,368 --> 00:19:45,736
Is that it?
315
00:19:46,571 --> 00:19:48,773
Oh, don't you just love it?!
316
00:19:49,140 --> 00:19:51,307
It's beautiful!
317
00:19:51,342 --> 00:19:53,211
Alligator pit! Alligator pit!
318
00:19:53,545 --> 00:19:55,747
You're no fun at all,
do you know that?
319
00:20:09,295 --> 00:20:10,864
Oh, man -
320
00:20:30,284 --> 00:20:31,953
Prince?
321
00:20:34,622 --> 00:20:37,426
We interrupt this programme for a
special news bulletin.
322
00:20:38,093 --> 00:20:40,394
Moments ago, a massive
explosion seems
323
00:20:40,429 --> 00:20:43,899
to have completely obliterated
the city of Orlando, Florida.
324
00:20:44,433 --> 00:20:47,302
Again, the city of Orlando, Florida
325
00:20:47,469 --> 00:20:49,839
has suffered a massive explosion.
326
00:20:50,707 --> 00:20:52,809
Orlando?
327
00:20:53,042 --> 00:20:54,077
Idiot.
328
00:20:56,913 --> 00:20:58,014
Good shot.
329
00:20:59,149 --> 00:21:03,554
Lexx, you hit the wrong place!
330
00:21:03,821 --> 00:21:07,124
I am sorry Stanley - I tried my best.
331
00:21:07,159 --> 00:21:09,460
How could you miss!
332
00:21:09,793 --> 00:21:11,996
I like to blow up whole planets.
333
00:21:12,031 --> 00:21:14,232
That is what I was designed for.
334
00:21:14,267 --> 00:21:16,399
I will try again if you like.
335
00:21:16,434 --> 00:21:19,504
- No!
- Congratulations, mass murderer.
336
00:21:19,738 --> 00:21:22,941
Oh, as if that matters to you!
That's it.
337
00:21:24,042 --> 00:21:25,711
I'm outta here.
338
00:21:26,212 --> 00:21:28,112
I've had it with this
whole stupid planet,
339
00:21:28,147 --> 00:21:30,383
I've had it with Prince, and I've
had it with everything.
340
00:21:30,418 --> 00:21:32,619
I say we just get outta
here right now,
341
00:21:32,654 --> 00:21:34,821
and take our chances someplace else.
342
00:21:34,856 --> 00:21:38,091
Lexx - get us outta here now!
343
00:21:38,292 --> 00:21:40,325
I am very weak Stanley.
344
00:21:40,360 --> 00:21:43,130
Unless I eat a lot more I will
not be able
345
00:21:43,165 --> 00:21:45,732
to go very far very quickly.
346
00:21:45,999 --> 00:21:49,403
Look Lexx, we'll find you something
else to eat along the way,
347
00:21:49,438 --> 00:21:53,608
OK? Let's just, just,
you know, just go!
348
00:21:53,643 --> 00:21:55,675
As you request, captain -
349
00:21:55,710 --> 00:21:59,881
but I will only be able to go
very, very slowly.
350
00:22:00,114 --> 00:22:01,883
Well, as long as you're moving.
351
00:22:08,390 --> 00:22:11,358
Stan - I don't wanna go just yet.
352
00:22:11,393 --> 00:22:14,163
Well Xev, if you don't
wanna go just yet,
353
00:22:14,530 --> 00:22:16,264
you get in a moth and you go down
to that planet,
354
00:22:16,299 --> 00:22:20,036
but don't expect me to wait for you,
because I'm leaving, right now!
355
00:22:20,071 --> 00:22:22,156
All because Prince is still
down there, right?
356
00:22:22,191 --> 00:22:24,241
That alone would be good
enough reason for me!
357
00:22:24,407 --> 00:22:26,343
I think you should both go down
there and stay.
358
00:22:26,378 --> 00:22:27,745
Oh, shut up, metal mouth!
359
00:22:27,945 --> 00:22:30,815
I'm sure the two of you would
be perfectly happy there.
360
00:22:31,149 --> 00:22:33,184
Stan, turn the Lexx around.
361
00:22:34,085 --> 00:22:35,553
I'm sorry Xev.
362
00:22:36,721 --> 00:22:39,758
We'll find you a nice
place later on, OK?
363
00:22:39,793 --> 00:22:41,994
With no Prince on it. I promise.
364
00:22:48,300 --> 00:22:50,469
You low-grade idiot!
365
00:22:50,736 --> 00:22:51,869
What?
366
00:22:51,904 --> 00:22:53,907
Prince is still alive!
367
00:22:54,474 --> 00:22:55,707
Not only that,
368
00:22:55,742 --> 00:22:58,243
you just blew up Orlando!
369
00:22:58,278 --> 00:23:03,049
- I tried my best, sweetie.
- Don't you call me sweetie,
370
00:23:03,084 --> 00:23:04,985
you little war hero!
371
00:23:06,921 --> 00:23:08,689
What are we gonna do, Reggie?
372
00:23:09,456 --> 00:23:10,756
I don't know.
373
00:23:10,791 --> 00:23:13,127
What are they gonna do to us
when they find out?
374
00:23:14,128 --> 00:23:17,899
They're gonna take all this
away - from me.
375
00:23:19,301 --> 00:23:22,971
You'll go to the electric chair, and
I won't be First Lady any more.
376
00:23:24,105 --> 00:23:26,942
And what'll Prince do to
us when he finds out?
377
00:23:27,609 --> 00:23:29,679
Finds out - what?
378
00:23:32,682 --> 00:23:36,552
- Prince!
- Finds out - what?
379
00:23:36,786 --> 00:23:40,289
Oo - nothing
380
00:23:40,823 --> 00:23:43,460
- We thought you were in Miami.
- Yes.
381
00:23:44,528 --> 00:23:46,029
Well I'm not
382
00:23:48,565 --> 00:23:50,032
Mr President -
383
00:23:50,067 --> 00:23:52,486
it appears that we've had
a spot of bother,
384
00:23:52,521 --> 00:23:54,906
- in Orlando.
- Yes, it's terrible, isn't it
385
00:23:54,941 --> 00:23:56,608
It's awful. All those
386
00:23:56,875 --> 00:23:58,977
cute little plastic animals melted
387
00:23:59,012 --> 00:24:01,079
and charred beyond recognition, well -
388
00:24:02,347 --> 00:24:04,249
Do we have any idea what happened yet?
389
00:24:05,783 --> 00:24:09,155
Oo, no. Maybe it just, um -
exploded by itself?
390
00:24:09,388 --> 00:24:12,491
You know, one minute it's there,
the next minute - pfft!
391
00:24:12,658 --> 00:24:15,394
Well that's an interesting theory,
Mr President,
392
00:24:15,427 --> 00:24:17,897
but I doubt that the people will
accept such an explanation.
393
00:24:18,364 --> 00:24:20,433
When something as terrible
as this happens,
394
00:24:20,468 --> 00:24:22,000
someone must be seen to pay for it,
395
00:24:22,035 --> 00:24:24,037
otherwise the public will
not be satisfied.
396
00:24:24,538 --> 00:24:25,705
And as you know -
397
00:24:25,939 --> 00:24:29,943
this is exactly the sort of incident
that gets a presidency into trouble.
398
00:24:36,250 --> 00:24:39,103
You're absolutely right, Isambard.
399
00:24:39,138 --> 00:24:41,956
Our very presidency is at stake -
400
00:24:42,790 --> 00:24:45,527
and it's far too big a matter
for our moronic
401
00:24:45,562 --> 00:24:47,496
president to take care of.
402
00:24:48,597 --> 00:24:49,898
I have a plan,
403
00:24:51,166 --> 00:24:53,268
to turn this thing around.
404
00:24:57,607 --> 00:25:00,109
Leaving this planet without any
idea where we are going
405
00:25:00,144 --> 00:25:02,744
is not a very bright decision.
406
00:25:02,779 --> 00:25:04,646
Too bad, I'm captain and you're not.
407
00:25:04,681 --> 00:25:06,916
You may not be able to reach
a life bearing planet
408
00:25:06,951 --> 00:25:09,185
unless the Lexx eats, Stanley.
409
00:25:09,220 --> 00:25:11,522
Well, what do you care, you're dead.
410
00:25:12,089 --> 00:25:14,825
You and Xev however are alive.
411
00:25:15,259 --> 00:25:17,193
It could take the Lexx many
thousands of years
412
00:25:17,228 --> 00:25:19,530
to reach a suitable planet in its
weakened condition.
413
00:25:19,930 --> 00:25:22,032
You will of course choose to
enter cryosleep,
414
00:25:22,067 --> 00:25:24,636
but the cryopods may not continue
to function properly
415
00:25:24,671 --> 00:25:25,969
for that length of time.
416
00:25:26,004 --> 00:25:29,241
OK then, I'll let the Lexx eat.
417
00:25:31,910 --> 00:25:33,143
Lexx -
418
00:25:33,178 --> 00:25:35,213
is there something down there,
419
00:25:35,248 --> 00:25:36,883
small enough you can eat
that's enough
420
00:25:36,918 --> 00:25:39,285
to keep you going at full speed?
421
00:25:39,320 --> 00:25:40,918
Yes, Stanley -
422
00:25:40,953 --> 00:25:43,154
I will be able to go full speed
423
00:25:43,189 --> 00:25:47,127
if I ate just that small little
part of the blue planet.
424
00:25:47,294 --> 00:25:51,165
It has lots of green goodness
and yummy protein,
425
00:25:51,200 --> 00:25:53,665
and not too many hard rocks.
426
00:25:53,700 --> 00:25:57,638
That land mass the Lexx is referring
to is a country called Holland.
427
00:25:58,105 --> 00:26:02,243
- Fine. Lexx - I order you to eat -
- Wait a second -
428
00:26:02,510 --> 00:26:05,046
if that's a country, then doesn't
it possibly have lots of people?
429
00:26:05,747 --> 00:26:07,914
Holland appears to be
densely populated -
430
00:26:07,949 --> 00:26:10,435
which means it would supply
Lexx with plenty of protein.
431
00:26:10,470 --> 00:26:12,922
Stan, you can't order the Lexx to
just eat a country -
432
00:26:12,957 --> 00:26:15,875
- that's mass murder.
- Well, that maybe
433
00:26:15,910 --> 00:26:18,794
technically speaking it's
mass murder,
434
00:26:18,828 --> 00:26:21,330
- but -
- It's wrong Stanley, and you know it.
435
00:26:21,365 --> 00:26:23,532
It's a Type 13 planet,
436
00:26:23,567 --> 00:26:25,936
Xev, it's doomed anyway! Lexx,
437
00:26:25,971 --> 00:26:28,305
I order you to eat Holland!
438
00:26:28,340 --> 00:26:30,238
As you request, Stan -
439
00:26:30,273 --> 00:26:33,977
and thank you. Holland looks
very, very tasty.
440
00:26:45,056 --> 00:26:46,057
Kai -
441
00:26:47,058 --> 00:26:49,761
if I asked you to, would you
kill Stanley?
442
00:26:49,796 --> 00:26:50,794
Hey!
443
00:26:50,829 --> 00:26:53,165
If you kill Stan, the key will
come back to me, right?
444
00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:55,334
- Hey, hey, hey, hey!
- Yes.
445
00:26:55,868 --> 00:26:57,920
If I kill Stan the key
will flow to you
446
00:26:57,955 --> 00:27:00,015
and you will become captain
of the Lexx.
447
00:27:00,050 --> 00:27:02,040
Oh come on, but you wouldn't
really do that
448
00:27:02,075 --> 00:27:04,844
would you, Kai old buddy old pal,
you wouldn't kill me,
449
00:27:04,879 --> 00:27:06,845
I mean, you're a former assassin,
450
00:27:06,880 --> 00:27:08,513
- right?
- Although I have no feeling
451
00:27:08,548 --> 00:27:11,182
for the people of Holland, I am
aware that morally speaking
452
00:27:11,217 --> 00:27:15,322
it is not right to sacrifice a whole
nation for one man's individual gain.
453
00:27:15,422 --> 00:27:16,856
Therefore,
454
00:27:16,891 --> 00:27:20,327
if Xev were to ask me to - I would.
455
00:27:20,661 --> 00:27:23,898
OK Kai, I order you - not to kill me.
456
00:27:24,732 --> 00:27:26,433
So if Xev asks you to kill me,
457
00:27:26,468 --> 00:27:28,570
the two orders cancel each
other out, right?
458
00:27:28,937 --> 00:27:29,971
Yes -
459
00:27:30,338 --> 00:27:33,308
but your choice to destroy Holland
tips the scales.
460
00:27:34,042 --> 00:27:37,312
So, if Xev asks me to -
461
00:27:38,247 --> 00:27:40,283
I will kill you, Stanley.
462
00:27:40,483 --> 00:27:42,285
Turn the Lexx around, Stan.
463
00:27:43,719 --> 00:27:45,186
- No.
- Yes.
464
00:27:45,221 --> 00:27:47,824
Kill them both Kai! That's my vote.
465
00:27:47,859 --> 00:27:48,856
Oh, shut up!
466
00:27:48,891 --> 00:27:51,261
Come on now guys, this
isn't funny anymore,
467
00:27:51,595 --> 00:27:54,381
OK? Look, we can't stay here,
and we can't go
468
00:27:54,416 --> 00:27:57,167
unless the Lexx eats. What choice
do we have?
469
00:27:57,768 --> 00:27:58,836
Xev?
470
00:28:00,003 --> 00:28:03,908
- Lexx - seal the bridge!
- As you command, Stan.
471
00:28:05,977 --> 00:28:07,846
I didn't know the Lexx could do that.
472
00:28:08,379 --> 00:28:10,915
Oh Lexx my friend,
473
00:28:11,049 --> 00:28:13,952
you are so full of surprises!
474
00:28:15,488 --> 00:28:16,722
OK guys -
475
00:28:17,656 --> 00:28:20,793
I'm not gonna let you out until you
promise not to kill me, OK?
476
00:28:21,260 --> 00:28:22,394
Guys?
477
00:28:23,295 --> 00:28:25,698
Look, I'm doing this for
your own good.
478
00:28:25,733 --> 00:28:27,868
Do you wish me to kill Stanley?
479
00:28:28,568 --> 00:28:29,634
What about this?
480
00:28:29,669 --> 00:28:33,039
Such barriers are not meaningful
to a Divine Assassin.
481
00:28:33,473 --> 00:28:36,076
OK guys - do I win, or what?
482
00:28:41,115 --> 00:28:44,218
Lexx - I command you not
to eat Holland!
483
00:28:44,385 --> 00:28:47,288
But I'm very hungry, Stan.
484
00:28:47,455 --> 00:28:48,821
Sorry Lexx -
485
00:28:48,856 --> 00:28:51,927
turn around and get out of this
solar system as fast as you can.
486
00:28:51,962 --> 00:28:55,497
Oh - all right.
487
00:29:12,015 --> 00:29:15,285
We invited you, our country's
senior journalists,
488
00:29:15,320 --> 00:29:17,186
to come to the Oval Office today
489
00:29:17,221 --> 00:29:20,891
so that the President could brief you
privately on the tragedy at Orlando.
490
00:29:21,659 --> 00:29:23,127
- Mr President -
- Yes.
491
00:29:25,196 --> 00:29:27,531
Thank you, Isambard.
Ladies and gentlemen -
492
00:29:28,199 --> 00:29:34,439
we have got a bad, bad, bad,
bad, bad, bad situation here, but
493
00:29:34,840 --> 00:29:39,411
we found a way to save the
presidency, yes - it's a good day.
494
00:29:39,578 --> 00:29:42,248
What the President is saying,
ladies and gentlemen,
495
00:29:42,949 --> 00:29:46,085
is that we have learned who
is responsible for Orlando.
496
00:29:46,152 --> 00:29:47,220
We have the proof.
497
00:29:48,221 --> 00:29:49,188
Right here.
498
00:29:49,589 --> 00:29:51,224
Why don't you play it for
them Reggie?
499
00:29:52,425 --> 00:29:53,259
Right.
500
00:29:55,028 --> 00:29:57,998
This tape was found by ATF agents
501
00:29:58,532 --> 00:30:01,101
in another political party's
head office,
502
00:30:01,401 --> 00:30:05,072
one hour before Orlando
was wiped out.
503
00:30:09,644 --> 00:30:11,012
This is
504
00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:13,713
General Juan Pinata -
505
00:30:13,748 --> 00:30:16,684
- That's - that's a Cuban general!
- It is the destiny of
506
00:30:16,719 --> 00:30:19,355
- It's outrageous.
- Cuba to read the world
507
00:30:19,455 --> 00:30:21,524
of the Yankee capitalistos,
508
00:30:22,091 --> 00:30:24,460
who always blame Cuba
for everything.
509
00:30:25,494 --> 00:30:28,864
And so, in one hour
510
00:30:29,598 --> 00:30:33,537
we will use one of our Russian
warheads from 1961
511
00:30:34,804 --> 00:30:37,340
to blow up the city of Orlando -
512
00:30:38,308 --> 00:30:40,510
Florida, America -
513
00:30:41,945 --> 00:30:43,748
in one hour.
514
00:30:44,482 --> 00:30:46,884
We may blow up other cities
after this one, we may not,
515
00:30:46,919 --> 00:30:47,885
you never know.
516
00:30:48,286 --> 00:30:50,555
Because you are all stupid
Yankee pig-dogs.
517
00:30:50,888 --> 00:30:51,923
I spit on you!
518
00:30:55,994 --> 00:30:57,429
Death to America!
519
00:30:58,263 --> 00:31:01,667
Death to stupid Yankee pig-dogs
in Orlando!
520
00:31:07,873 --> 00:31:09,576
It was Cuba after all.
521
00:31:11,311 --> 00:31:13,446
Wasn't that the Washington Monument
in the background?
522
00:31:13,646 --> 00:31:16,449
I think that was the Che Guevara
Monument in Havana.
523
00:31:16,484 --> 00:31:18,551
How will you respond to this,
Mr President?
524
00:31:21,222 --> 00:31:22,690
Just throw me the damn football.
525
00:31:28,796 --> 00:31:30,596
We'll show them who's boss.
526
00:31:30,631 --> 00:31:32,733
To authorise the launch codes,
simply place your hand
527
00:31:32,768 --> 00:31:33,969
here, Mr President.
528
00:31:34,636 --> 00:31:37,839
I hereby authorise launch codes
for Operation Cigarillo.
529
00:31:41,109 --> 00:31:42,744
Adios, Cuba
530
00:31:46,482 --> 00:31:48,751
America will respect you,
Mr President.
531
00:31:48,951 --> 00:31:50,284
You've done the right thing.
532
00:31:50,319 --> 00:31:52,688
No foreign greaseball's
gonna push us around.
533
00:31:53,055 --> 00:31:55,725
It's strong leadership at
the right time,
534
00:31:56,092 --> 00:31:58,095
from a real war hero.
535
00:32:01,832 --> 00:32:04,334
I swear that was the
Washington Monument.
536
00:32:04,601 --> 00:32:06,703
Have you seen my butterfly room?
537
00:32:09,273 --> 00:32:11,576
You'll love it. I'm very good -
538
00:32:12,110 --> 00:32:13,678
with butterflies.
539
00:32:25,658 --> 00:32:28,027
Here are some of the stories we're
following for tonight's
540
00:32:28,062 --> 00:32:29,760
edition of News Plus.
541
00:32:29,795 --> 00:32:32,698
The Dow Jones is up 456 points.
542
00:32:33,132 --> 00:32:35,201
Fire fighters have been
called in to retrieve
543
00:32:35,236 --> 00:32:38,138
a cat stuck in a power
line along I95.
544
00:32:38,538 --> 00:32:39,871
Film at 11-
545
00:32:39,906 --> 00:32:42,225
and Cuba was nuked off the
face of the Earth
546
00:32:42,260 --> 00:32:44,544
late this afternoon by
President Priest,
547
00:32:44,611 --> 00:32:47,782
in retaliation for yesterday's evil
attack on Orlando.
548
00:32:48,182 --> 00:32:50,484
There has been no reaction
so far from Havana.
549
00:32:50,785 --> 00:32:54,455
All this, and your late local
forecast, coming up on News Plus.
550
00:32:58,092 --> 00:32:58,958
Yes?
551
00:32:58,993 --> 00:33:02,030
Sir, this is NASA. We thought we
should inform you that our
552
00:33:02,065 --> 00:33:04,566
readings indicate that the
Lexx at this moment
553
00:33:04,601 --> 00:33:06,935
has started moving away
from the Earth.
554
00:33:26,056 --> 00:33:27,124
Prince!
555
00:33:27,458 --> 00:33:30,294
Hello, Stanley. It's
nice to see you.
556
00:33:30,861 --> 00:33:33,197
And Kai - and Xev,
557
00:33:33,731 --> 00:33:36,117
you as well of course. So,
558
00:33:36,152 --> 00:33:38,328
we're leaving Earth, are we?
559
00:33:38,363 --> 00:33:40,505
- We are.
- That's a shame.
560
00:33:40,540 --> 00:33:42,407
Well, yes and no.
561
00:33:42,741 --> 00:33:43,775
How so?
562
00:33:43,875 --> 00:33:47,445
All I can say is that I'm happy to
be flying away from you.
563
00:33:47,579 --> 00:33:50,483
Ah but Stanley, this planet
is just so much fun.
564
00:33:50,518 --> 00:33:53,553
Well, some of us don't find
it fun to be -
565
00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:56,187
pinned to a wall and almost killed!
566
00:33:56,222 --> 00:33:58,357
Well that was just a little
misunderstanding!
567
00:33:58,991 --> 00:34:01,594
Do you mind telling me exactly
where you're going?
568
00:34:01,629 --> 00:34:04,464
The plan is we're going to
drift in space,
569
00:34:04,499 --> 00:34:06,300
until we find a nice planet.
570
00:34:06,335 --> 00:34:07,933
That's a good plan.
571
00:34:07,968 --> 00:34:10,103
You must have worked on that
for a long time.
572
00:34:10,138 --> 00:34:12,239
Well, we wouldn't have to drift
if the Lexx
573
00:34:12,274 --> 00:34:14,876
came down there and
at Washington DC,
574
00:34:14,911 --> 00:34:17,478
- and you with it.
- Well why don't you?
575
00:34:17,513 --> 00:34:18,778
Well we just might.
576
00:34:18,813 --> 00:34:21,082
I think you should stay, Stanley.
577
00:34:21,716 --> 00:34:24,319
How would you like to be
Vice President?
578
00:34:24,354 --> 00:34:25,785
Yeah, right, what's that?
579
00:34:25,820 --> 00:34:28,524
A very important position, with
all the perks
580
00:34:28,559 --> 00:34:30,626
and privileges you could ever want.
581
00:34:30,661 --> 00:34:31,692
No deal.
582
00:34:31,727 --> 00:34:34,029
Xev - you could be Queen of England.
583
00:34:34,363 --> 00:34:36,530
She's not interested!
584
00:34:36,565 --> 00:34:39,436
The Queen of England owns her
own beautiful island
585
00:34:39,471 --> 00:34:41,589
full of gardens and antiques.
586
00:34:41,624 --> 00:34:43,672
The position is currently filled,
587
00:34:43,707 --> 00:34:46,676
but all it would take to free it up
would be a couple of phone calls.
588
00:34:46,711 --> 00:34:51,281
She is not interested in gardens
or antiques!
589
00:34:51,316 --> 00:34:53,084
Then what do you care about, Stanley?
590
00:34:53,119 --> 00:34:55,187
Why do you want us to stay, Prince?
591
00:34:55,222 --> 00:34:57,289
- Because I do.
- The fact is Prince,
592
00:34:57,324 --> 00:34:59,141
as long as you are on that planet,
593
00:34:59,176 --> 00:35:01,201
we don't want anything to do with it.
594
00:35:01,236 --> 00:35:03,227
- Oh, that stings.
- I have an idea -
595
00:35:03,794 --> 00:35:07,232
Kai, would you kill Prince if
we both asked you to?
596
00:35:08,834 --> 00:35:10,934
- Yes.
- Yeah Kai, you could go down to Earth
597
00:35:10,969 --> 00:35:14,740
and do your assassin thing on
somebody who really deserves it.
598
00:35:14,775 --> 00:35:18,011
Yes, Kai, go down to Earth
and kill Prince.
599
00:35:18,046 --> 00:35:20,411
Ah. There's one small
600
00:35:20,446 --> 00:35:22,882
tiny little flaw in your thinking.
601
00:35:22,917 --> 00:35:24,549
- Which is -?
- You forget,
602
00:35:24,584 --> 00:35:27,587
I'm the head of the most powerful
institution on this planet -
603
00:35:27,820 --> 00:35:30,291
The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco
and Firearms
604
00:35:30,326 --> 00:35:31,790
of the United States of America,
605
00:35:31,825 --> 00:35:34,828
and as such, I have an
immense capacity
606
00:35:34,863 --> 00:35:37,715
to protect myself. I can hide away
607
00:35:37,750 --> 00:35:40,568
so that you would never, ever find me.
608
00:35:40,734 --> 00:35:42,771
- Is that a problem?
- No.
609
00:35:43,972 --> 00:35:47,209
As a Divine Assassin I performed
many difficult assassinations.
610
00:35:47,244 --> 00:35:51,146
For instance, Ring Torbin, the
rebel leader on Phoebe 27.
611
00:35:51,413 --> 00:35:54,550
Ring Torbin buried himself deep inside
the molten core of the planet.
612
00:35:54,851 --> 00:35:56,551
He was protected by fifty thousand men
613
00:35:56,586 --> 00:35:59,222
- with robot controlled ion weapons.
- And -?
614
00:36:00,256 --> 00:36:03,893
I had to kill 2,807 of his men
before I killed him.
615
00:36:04,093 --> 00:36:06,528
- Ha, ha!
- I can eliminate Prince
616
00:36:06,563 --> 00:36:08,765
with complete certainty in
a short time.
617
00:36:08,932 --> 00:36:11,284
And if you kill me, what then?
618
00:36:11,319 --> 00:36:13,637
You know I can be reborn, whenever
619
00:36:13,672 --> 00:36:15,537
and however I want.
620
00:36:15,572 --> 00:36:17,708
That was true on the planet Fire -
621
00:36:17,975 --> 00:36:19,944
- but is it true on Earth?
- Yes.
622
00:36:21,312 --> 00:36:22,378
I think so.
623
00:36:22,413 --> 00:36:24,315
It can't be true on Earth.
624
00:36:25,316 --> 00:36:28,419
Look - he's scared!
625
00:36:29,087 --> 00:36:31,490
- You're scared, aren't you Prince?
- Year,
626
00:36:32,024 --> 00:36:34,592
- Xev is right.
- You know that when you destroyed
627
00:36:34,627 --> 00:36:37,696
the planet Fire all of its evil
including me came here,
628
00:36:37,731 --> 00:36:39,431
so it makes no difference.
629
00:36:39,765 --> 00:36:43,035
This planet will be just as bad
whether I live or die.
630
00:36:43,070 --> 00:36:45,772
I'm just a drop in an
ocean of badness -
631
00:36:45,807 --> 00:36:48,139
or, rather, more of a bucketful.
632
00:36:48,174 --> 00:36:49,941
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, you're wrong.
633
00:36:49,976 --> 00:36:52,611
You're just trying to talk us out
of killing you.
634
00:36:52,646 --> 00:36:56,217
- On the contrary, I'm right.
- Kai, do you think he's right?
635
00:36:57,885 --> 00:36:58,920
Yes.
636
00:37:01,722 --> 00:37:04,325
So - good luck on your journey.
637
00:37:04,825 --> 00:37:07,795
You'll need it. Cheerie bye.
638
00:37:08,095 --> 00:37:09,998
Bye, bye, little blue planet.
639
00:37:21,644 --> 00:37:23,980
- You don't look happy, my prince.
- I'm not.
640
00:37:24,647 --> 00:37:26,649
Why did you blow up Orlando?
641
00:37:27,083 --> 00:37:28,351
Er - what do you mean?
642
00:37:28,985 --> 00:37:32,522
I know that you got Stanley Tweedle
to blow up Orlando.
643
00:37:33,457 --> 00:37:37,328
My only question is, precisely why?
644
00:37:39,763 --> 00:37:42,900
Just to cause trouble, my prince,
you know, screw things up,
645
00:37:42,935 --> 00:37:45,069
create chaos, just like
you always want.
646
00:37:45,104 --> 00:37:46,137
Really?
647
00:37:47,672 --> 00:37:50,608
- Mm hmm.
- I think you wanted to get rid of me -
648
00:37:50,643 --> 00:37:53,545
- Oo no, no.
- and you thought I was in Miami,
649
00:37:53,678 --> 00:37:55,345
- didn't you?
- Well, yes, but -
650
00:37:55,380 --> 00:37:58,451
and you got Stanley Tweedle to fire
one of the Lexx's shots at me,
651
00:37:58,718 --> 00:38:01,387
only it missed and took out Orlando.
652
00:38:01,654 --> 00:38:03,389
Am I getting warm?
653
00:38:04,524 --> 00:38:05,825
I don't know what to say.
654
00:38:08,928 --> 00:38:11,698
You say "You're right, my prince".
655
00:38:11,932 --> 00:38:14,000
You're right, my prince - but,
656
00:38:14,035 --> 00:38:16,069
but it was the First Lady's idea!
657
00:38:16,103 --> 00:38:18,238
All hers.
658
00:38:18,273 --> 00:38:20,374
Only hers!
659
00:38:22,142 --> 00:38:23,710
Forgive me, my prince.
660
00:38:23,745 --> 00:38:26,147
I'm not very good at forgiveness.
661
00:38:27,048 --> 00:38:29,584
Especially as your little prank
has stranded me
662
00:38:29,619 --> 00:38:32,037
on this planet. Because of you,
663
00:38:32,072 --> 00:38:34,455
I'm stuck here, do you understand?
664
00:38:38,827 --> 00:38:40,494
You have to be punished.
665
00:38:40,529 --> 00:38:43,465
Yes of course my prince, I deserve it.
What is my punishment?
666
00:38:43,632 --> 00:38:46,135
Have you ever been to Dallas?
667
00:38:47,837 --> 00:38:48,905
What's Dallas?
668
00:38:50,373 --> 00:38:52,943
I'm aware that this is not the
usual protocol,
669
00:38:52,978 --> 00:38:55,210
but I am issuing a specific order
670
00:38:55,245 --> 00:38:58,315
for the Secret Service,
the CIA, the FBI
671
00:38:58,350 --> 00:39:01,385
and the Dallas police
to stand down.
672
00:39:01,886 --> 00:39:02,954
Thank you.
673
00:39:04,689 --> 00:39:06,824
So, Mr President -
674
00:39:06,991 --> 00:39:09,759
- welcome to Dallas.
- What a dump?
675
00:39:09,794 --> 00:39:13,332
True - but Dallas plays an
important part in American history.
676
00:39:13,367 --> 00:39:15,051
- Is that right?
- Hmm.
677
00:39:15,086 --> 00:39:16,735
Have you ever heard of JFK?
678
00:39:16,770 --> 00:39:18,402
No, er, maybe.
679
00:39:18,437 --> 00:39:20,539
22nd of November 1963?
680
00:39:20,772 --> 00:39:23,342
- Should I have?
- Well, once upon a time,
681
00:39:23,377 --> 00:39:26,112
there was this president
called JFK.
682
00:39:26,679 --> 00:39:28,648
And this president had a
very bad habit
683
00:39:28,683 --> 00:39:30,701
of not following orders - too.
684
00:39:30,736 --> 00:39:32,684
- Oo - that's not good?
- No.
685
00:39:32,719 --> 00:39:34,687
Consequently he had to
be punished -
686
00:39:35,054 --> 00:39:38,025
just about here, as a
matter of fact.
687
00:39:40,528 --> 00:39:41,529
Oh. Oh!
688
00:39:42,229 --> 00:39:43,230
What?
689
00:39:43,631 --> 00:39:45,332
- Oh no.
- What?
690
00:39:45,833 --> 00:39:48,234
Quick - change seats!
691
00:39:48,269 --> 00:39:51,139
- Why?
- Don't argue with me, just do it!
692
00:39:54,843 --> 00:39:56,309
And I've brought you here because
693
00:39:56,344 --> 00:39:59,180
I thought this would be a perfect
spot to ask a question.
694
00:39:59,381 --> 00:40:01,248
- What question?
- Do you think you
695
00:40:01,283 --> 00:40:04,020
- can follow orders?
- Yes, yes, of course my prince -
696
00:40:04,055 --> 00:40:05,705
I will do anything you say.
697
00:40:05,740 --> 00:40:07,321
I wish I could believe you.
698
00:40:07,356 --> 00:40:09,258
Look, Reggie just agreed with you,
what more do you want?
699
00:40:09,293 --> 00:40:11,394
- Now let's get going!
- I really want to trust
700
00:40:11,429 --> 00:40:12,994
you Mr President, I really do.
701
00:40:13,029 --> 00:40:15,098
You can trust him, you can trust him!
702
00:40:15,133 --> 00:40:17,301
I'm speaking to the President.
703
00:40:17,935 --> 00:40:20,536
The lesson to be learnt here
is that even kings
704
00:40:20,571 --> 00:40:23,941
can be killed. It's been that way
for thousands of years.
705
00:40:23,976 --> 00:40:26,543
Regicide happens all the time -
706
00:40:27,212 --> 00:40:29,814
especially to the stupid ones,
707
00:40:30,181 --> 00:40:33,051
who don't know how to follow orders.
708
00:40:56,142 --> 00:41:00,580
War hero, my ass.
709
00:41:01,882 --> 00:41:03,984
- I think she's dead.
- So sad.
710
00:41:04,019 --> 00:41:05,586
I'll get over it.
711
00:41:06,387 --> 00:41:08,656
A lesson well learned,
wouldn't you say?
712
00:41:10,024 --> 00:41:13,127
We'll have to get you a new
First Lady - time to trade up.
713
00:41:13,162 --> 00:41:15,329
Yes! Excellent idea, my prince.
714
00:41:15,596 --> 00:41:18,333
- I'll trade up.
- And you'll always remember
715
00:41:18,368 --> 00:41:20,335
- who's in charge?
- Yes.
716
00:41:21,970 --> 00:41:23,770
Yes of course, my prince.
717
00:41:23,805 --> 00:41:27,175
- You are my prince.
- Yes, yes, yes, thank you.
718
00:41:43,294 --> 00:41:44,662
Yes.
719
00:41:49,833 --> 00:41:51,101
Come in.
720
00:41:56,575 --> 00:42:00,078
There's something wrong with
my pussy, doctor.
721
00:42:01,313 --> 00:42:03,281
What seems to be the problem?
722
00:42:03,515 --> 00:42:05,284
Well, I don't know.
723
00:42:05,319 --> 00:42:07,287
He's gone off his food,
724
00:42:07,322 --> 00:42:09,255
he doesn't purr anymore -
725
00:42:09,689 --> 00:42:11,991
and he walks all stiffly.
726
00:42:12,692 --> 00:42:15,561
And sometimes he just flies
727
00:42:15,596 --> 00:42:18,431
round and round the room.
728
00:42:18,865 --> 00:42:21,718
- I beg your pardon?
- He's not my
729
00:42:21,753 --> 00:42:24,897
precious little pussy
Buttons anymore!
730
00:42:24,932 --> 00:42:28,041
Well, let's take a little
look, shall we?
731
00:42:37,318 --> 00:42:38,586
So -
732
00:42:39,921 --> 00:42:44,126
- how's Buttons today, huh?
- You gotta do something doctor.
733
00:42:44,526 --> 00:42:47,012
Oh yes, there seems
to be something
734
00:42:47,047 --> 00:42:49,498
- a little off here.
- What? What?
735
00:42:49,533 --> 00:42:51,665
There seems to be something
736
00:42:51,700 --> 00:42:55,437
- inside Buttons.
- Oh no! Oh Buttons!
737
00:42:56,239 --> 00:42:57,274
Oh!
738
00:42:57,974 --> 00:42:58,875
No!
739
00:43:00,443 --> 00:43:06,446
Resync: Xenzai[NEF]
740
00:43:07,443 --> 00:43:10,446
Mikl, Bars
54810
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