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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,919 --> 00:00:03,089 (eerie music) 2 00:00:03,089 --> 00:00:09,101 ♪ 3 00:00:26,177 --> 00:00:27,556 ‐ Hey, guys. 4 00:00:27,556 --> 00:00:30,185 So I know my channel's been off the radar for a while, 5 00:00:30,185 --> 00:00:32,398 and no, I wasn't abducted by lizard people 6 00:00:32,398 --> 00:00:35,279 or sent to that top secret CIA prison island, 7 00:00:35,279 --> 00:00:38,493 which by the way totally exists. 8 00:00:38,493 --> 00:00:39,746 I've just had to lay low for a while 9 00:00:39,746 --> 00:00:43,211 'cause, well, I think the feds are watching me. 10 00:00:43,211 --> 00:00:44,338 And like, I mean, yeah, 11 00:00:44,338 --> 00:00:45,508 of course they're watching everybody, 12 00:00:45,508 --> 00:00:48,471 but I'm talking like special ops task force 13 00:00:48,471 --> 00:00:49,850 kind of watching. 14 00:00:49,850 --> 00:00:51,604 And normally, I'd just lay low 15 00:00:51,604 --> 00:00:55,987 till the heat's off, but...well, sometimes, 16 00:00:55,987 --> 00:00:58,659 the truth is more important than safety. 17 00:00:58,659 --> 00:01:00,663 So here goes. 18 00:01:00,663 --> 00:01:04,337 ♪ 19 00:01:04,337 --> 00:01:05,673 Okay. 20 00:01:05,673 --> 00:01:07,051 It all happened a year ago. 21 00:01:07,051 --> 00:01:08,804 St. Patrick's Day, actually. 22 00:01:08,804 --> 00:01:10,307 Coincidentally, the same day that 23 00:01:10,307 --> 00:01:13,731 a meteor crashed into our town back in the '70s. 24 00:01:13,731 --> 00:01:14,816 It was supposed to just be 25 00:01:14,816 --> 00:01:17,363 a night of college kids getting drunk, 26 00:01:17,363 --> 00:01:21,997 but a lot of people died, like, a lot of people. 27 00:01:21,997 --> 00:01:27,967 ♪ 28 00:01:37,194 --> 00:01:40,492 (thudding rock music) 29 00:01:40,492 --> 00:01:46,505 ♪ 30 00:01:58,863 --> 00:02:01,242 (drunken incoherent chatter) 31 00:02:01,242 --> 00:02:03,246 PARTIER: You little fucker, come on. 32 00:02:03,246 --> 00:02:06,127 (siren blares) 33 00:02:06,127 --> 00:02:11,429 ♪ 34 00:02:11,429 --> 00:02:13,559 SHAUNA: Welcome to Emerald Springs 35 00:02:13,559 --> 00:02:15,688 Did I mention we love St. Patrick's Day? 36 00:02:15,688 --> 00:02:17,734 Yeah, Chicago has the whole green river thing, 37 00:02:17,734 --> 00:02:20,363 but we do more of a green river of puke thing. 38 00:02:20,363 --> 00:02:22,744 What else would you expect from a town full of college kids? 39 00:02:22,744 --> 00:02:25,750 Or, as I call them, "customers"? 40 00:02:27,879 --> 00:02:30,091 SERGEANT: Officer Sullivan, what's your 10 20? 41 00:02:30,091 --> 00:02:31,469 DOMINIC: Yo, this is ridiculous. 42 00:02:31,469 --> 00:02:32,722 I could literally arrest every single person 43 00:02:32,722 --> 00:02:34,976 on this street right now. 44 00:02:34,976 --> 00:02:36,522 SERGEANT: Don't have enough cells to hold them all. 45 00:02:36,522 --> 00:02:38,734 Just let them celebrate. 46 00:02:38,734 --> 00:02:40,905 ‐ Fuck me. You call this celebrating? 47 00:02:40,905 --> 00:02:42,407 SERGEANT: I don't know what to tell you, rookie. 48 00:02:42,407 --> 00:02:43,911 You shoulda seen last year. 49 00:02:43,911 --> 00:02:47,042 A whole pledge class took green shits on the courthouse lawn. 50 00:02:47,042 --> 00:02:48,253 DOMINIC: You're fucking with me, right? 51 00:02:48,253 --> 00:02:50,215 SERGEANT: Luck of the Irish, man. 52 00:02:50,215 --> 00:02:52,386 (laughter, blaring music) 53 00:02:52,386 --> 00:02:53,973 ‐ Shamrock shithole. 54 00:02:53,973 --> 00:02:55,518 SERGEANT: Hey, Sullivan, just make it through tonight 55 00:02:55,518 --> 00:02:57,145 and beers are on me, all right? 56 00:02:57,145 --> 00:02:59,358 DOMINIC: Yeah, I don't think I'm gonna be drinking 57 00:02:59,358 --> 00:03:01,237 for a while. 58 00:03:01,237 --> 00:03:03,408 All right, I'm gonna head towards the college. 59 00:03:03,408 --> 00:03:04,786 SERGEANT: Okay, after that, why don't you catch up 60 00:03:04,786 --> 00:03:06,289 with the Massacre? 61 00:03:06,289 --> 00:03:10,798 Just play babysitter and make sure they don't all die. 62 00:03:10,798 --> 00:03:12,510 DOMINIC: Let's go, kids. 63 00:03:12,510 --> 00:03:14,556 (music blares, siren whoops) 64 00:03:14,556 --> 00:03:17,269 (eerie music) 65 00:03:17,269 --> 00:03:23,281 ♪ 66 00:03:30,128 --> 00:03:31,548 Evening, ladies. 67 00:03:31,548 --> 00:03:34,261 ♪ 68 00:03:34,261 --> 00:03:38,019 (laughter) 69 00:03:38,019 --> 00:03:39,814 Word. 70 00:03:39,814 --> 00:03:41,025 SHAUNA: Wow. 71 00:03:41,025 --> 00:03:43,321 Swing and a miss, Officer Fuckboy. 72 00:03:43,321 --> 00:03:49,333 ♪ 73 00:03:51,588 --> 00:03:53,341 (thud, slams on brakes) 74 00:03:53,341 --> 00:03:59,353 ♪ 75 00:04:09,456 --> 00:04:10,876 DOMINIC: Shit. 76 00:04:10,876 --> 00:04:13,924 ♪ 77 00:04:13,924 --> 00:04:16,220 Fuck. 78 00:04:16,220 --> 00:04:21,898 ♪ 79 00:04:21,898 --> 00:04:24,612 Better be drunk or high. 80 00:04:24,612 --> 00:04:26,032 Are you all right there? 81 00:04:26,032 --> 00:04:31,752 ♪ 82 00:04:31,752 --> 00:04:33,004 Are you okay there? 83 00:04:33,004 --> 00:04:38,056 ♪ 84 00:04:38,056 --> 00:04:39,684 The hell happened to your clothes, man? 85 00:04:39,684 --> 00:04:45,696 ♪ 86 00:04:50,205 --> 00:04:51,958 Okay. 87 00:04:51,958 --> 00:04:53,419 All right, hey. 88 00:04:53,419 --> 00:04:57,637 ‐ What happened? ‐ Oh‐‐hey‐‐take it easy, yeah? 89 00:04:57,637 --> 00:05:00,058 You take something, hm? 90 00:05:00,058 --> 00:05:01,895 Drugs? 91 00:05:01,895 --> 00:05:04,274 Hey, are you‐‐are you a student here? 92 00:05:04,274 --> 00:05:05,820 ♪ 93 00:05:05,820 --> 00:05:06,947 Say something, man. 94 00:05:06,947 --> 00:05:09,451 (chomp, roar) 95 00:05:09,451 --> 00:05:10,788 SHAUNA: Okay, I know what you're thinking. 96 00:05:10,788 --> 00:05:12,332 And no, it's not zombies. 97 00:05:12,332 --> 00:05:13,794 People always think it's zombies, 98 00:05:13,794 --> 00:05:15,338 but they have a totally different pathology. 99 00:05:15,338 --> 00:05:17,802 Just...you'll see. 100 00:05:17,802 --> 00:05:19,722 (yells, exclaims) 101 00:05:19,722 --> 00:05:25,734 ♪ 102 00:05:34,209 --> 00:05:35,086 ‐ What the fuck? 103 00:05:35,086 --> 00:05:36,297 SHAUNA: Like I said, 104 00:05:36,297 --> 00:05:39,094 it's gonna be a fucking crazy night. 105 00:05:39,094 --> 00:05:40,180 ‐ No fucking way! 106 00:05:40,180 --> 00:05:41,348 (Kim Petras, "There Will Be Blood") 107 00:05:41,348 --> 00:05:42,475 ♪ There will be blood ♪ 108 00:05:42,475 --> 00:05:44,479 ♪ Run for your life ♪ 109 00:05:44,479 --> 00:05:48,321 ♪ Go on and say, go on and say your last goodbye ♪ 110 00:05:48,321 --> 00:05:51,202 ♪ There will be blood ♪ 111 00:05:51,202 --> 00:05:53,247 ♪ You're gonna die ♪ 112 00:05:53,247 --> 00:05:57,339 ♪ You'll never make it, never make it through the night ♪ 113 00:05:57,339 --> 00:06:01,514 ♪ There will be blood ♪ 114 00:06:01,514 --> 00:06:06,023 ♪ There will be blood ♪ 115 00:06:06,023 --> 00:06:10,658 ♪ There will be blood ♪ 116 00:06:10,658 --> 00:06:15,375 ♪ There will be blood ♪ 117 00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:17,630 ♪ There will be ♪ 118 00:06:17,630 --> 00:06:19,759 ♪ Ain't no prayer that could save you now ♪ 119 00:06:19,759 --> 00:06:21,972 ♪ Ain't nobody can hear you shout ♪ 120 00:06:21,972 --> 00:06:24,268 ♪ When I'm pulling you underground ♪ 121 00:06:24,268 --> 00:06:26,606 ♪ There will be ♪ 122 00:06:26,606 --> 00:06:28,777 ♪ Take a sip from the devil's cup ♪ 123 00:06:28,777 --> 00:06:31,031 ♪ Just a taste, you won't get enough ♪ 124 00:06:31,031 --> 00:06:33,286 ♪ Seal your fate when you swallow up ♪ 125 00:06:33,286 --> 00:06:35,039 ♪ There will be ♪ 126 00:06:35,039 --> 00:06:39,549 ♪ Don't let me in, I'ma ruin your life ♪ 127 00:06:39,549 --> 00:06:42,387 ♪ I'm straight psychotic ♪ 128 00:06:42,387 --> 00:06:44,057 ♪ There will be ♪ 129 00:06:44,057 --> 00:06:48,567 ♪ This is gonna be a hell of a night ♪ 130 00:06:48,567 --> 00:06:51,196 ♪ I know you want it ♪ 131 00:06:51,196 --> 00:06:54,161 ♪ There will be blood ♪ 132 00:06:54,161 --> 00:06:56,290 ♪ Run for your life ♪ 133 00:06:56,290 --> 00:06:59,881 ♪ Go on and say, go on and say your last goodbye ♪ 134 00:06:59,881 --> 00:07:03,054 ♪ There will be blood ♪ 135 00:07:03,054 --> 00:07:04,932 ♪ You're gonna die ♪ 136 00:07:04,932 --> 00:07:09,066 ♪ You'll never make it, never make it through the night ♪ 137 00:07:09,066 --> 00:07:13,449 ♪ There will be blood ♪ 138 00:07:13,449 --> 00:07:18,084 ♪ There will be blood ♪ 139 00:07:18,084 --> 00:07:22,467 ♪ There will be blood ♪ 140 00:07:22,467 --> 00:07:26,976 ♪ There will be blood ♪ 141 00:07:26,976 --> 00:07:29,439 ♪ There will be ♪♪ 142 00:07:32,487 --> 00:07:36,245 (acoustic Irish music) 143 00:07:36,245 --> 00:07:38,249 SHAUNA: You ever heard of the porcupine's dilemma? 144 00:07:38,249 --> 00:07:39,669 It's the one about those little guys 145 00:07:39,669 --> 00:07:40,838 who wanna cuddle up for warmth 146 00:07:40,838 --> 00:07:42,800 but they just keep poking each other. 147 00:07:42,800 --> 00:07:44,679 It basically means getting close to people 148 00:07:44,679 --> 00:07:46,975 hurts like a bitch. 149 00:07:46,975 --> 00:07:48,310 This is Misty, 150 00:07:48,310 --> 00:07:49,856 and she's smack‐dab in the middle of 151 00:07:49,856 --> 00:07:51,985 her own prickly situation. 152 00:07:51,985 --> 00:07:54,949 ♪ 153 00:07:54,949 --> 00:07:56,243 Up until a few weeks ago, 154 00:07:56,243 --> 00:07:58,372 she and Chloe were besties. 155 00:07:58,372 --> 00:08:01,713 At least, that's what she thought. 156 00:08:01,713 --> 00:08:07,725 ♪ 157 00:08:11,774 --> 00:08:16,158 GROUP: Happy St. Paddy's Day! 158 00:08:16,158 --> 00:08:21,878 ♪ 159 00:08:21,878 --> 00:08:24,634 SHAUNA: This is why I don't bother with friends. 160 00:08:24,634 --> 00:08:27,388 Too much baggage and very little upside. 161 00:08:27,388 --> 00:08:28,975 If there's anything my mom taught me, 162 00:08:28,975 --> 00:08:31,230 it's family first, yourself second, 163 00:08:31,230 --> 00:08:34,486 and fuck everyone else. 164 00:08:34,486 --> 00:08:36,616 But Misty's one of those normal girls 165 00:08:36,616 --> 00:08:38,494 who likes having people around. 166 00:08:38,494 --> 00:08:40,456 She's hoping that they can patch things up 167 00:08:40,456 --> 00:08:42,878 the good old‐fashioned way: 168 00:08:42,878 --> 00:08:44,381 binge drinking. 169 00:08:44,381 --> 00:08:47,220 ♪ 170 00:08:47,220 --> 00:08:48,765 PARTIER: Hey, what's up, Misty? 171 00:08:48,765 --> 00:08:51,353 SHAUNA: And what better way than an all‐night pub crawl? 172 00:08:51,353 --> 00:08:52,856 They call this one the Massacre 173 00:08:52,856 --> 00:08:55,403 because nobody makes it out alive. 174 00:08:55,403 --> 00:08:57,533 Figuratively speaking, of course. 175 00:08:57,533 --> 00:08:59,870 CHLOE: You waitin' on this motherfuckin' bartender? 176 00:08:59,870 --> 00:09:01,164 Stank. 177 00:09:01,164 --> 00:09:03,419 I'm waiting like 30 minutes for a shot. 178 00:09:03,419 --> 00:09:04,630 You know what? 179 00:09:04,630 --> 00:09:07,343 Fuck this, motherfuckers, I'm the bartender now. 180 00:09:07,343 --> 00:09:09,014 Heads back, mouths open. 181 00:09:09,014 --> 00:09:12,103 One for you, two for you, cutie. 182 00:09:12,103 --> 00:09:14,274 Hey! And one for me. 183 00:09:14,274 --> 00:09:15,986 SHAUNA: And here's the self‐proclaimed 184 00:09:15,986 --> 00:09:17,906 master of ceremonies, Chloe. 185 00:09:17,906 --> 00:09:19,619 She loves to be the center of attention, 186 00:09:19,619 --> 00:09:20,996 and on a night like tonight, 187 00:09:20,996 --> 00:09:23,042 that's not necessarily a good thing. 188 00:09:23,042 --> 00:09:24,795 ♪ 189 00:09:24,795 --> 00:09:26,507 Misty and Chloe have been attached at the hip 190 00:09:26,507 --> 00:09:28,177 since freshman year. 191 00:09:28,177 --> 00:09:30,014 But some shit went down a few weeks ago, 192 00:09:30,014 --> 00:09:32,561 and when Misty really needed a friend, 193 00:09:32,561 --> 00:09:34,189 Chloe was nowhere to be found. 194 00:09:34,189 --> 00:09:35,692 I mean, I'd kick her to the curb, 195 00:09:35,692 --> 00:09:37,028 but Misty's loyal. 196 00:09:37,028 --> 00:09:40,786 Or, I dunno, maybe just pathetic. 197 00:09:40,786 --> 00:09:42,413 ‐ Sláinte! 198 00:09:42,413 --> 00:09:45,169 (cheering) 199 00:09:45,169 --> 00:09:47,048 Let's go! 200 00:09:47,048 --> 00:09:49,302 ‐ Hey, Chlo! 201 00:09:49,302 --> 00:09:50,889 (Chloe screams) 202 00:09:50,889 --> 00:09:52,266 ‐ Misty! 203 00:09:52,266 --> 00:09:54,563 You made it, girl! 204 00:09:54,563 --> 00:09:56,567 Oh, shit. 205 00:09:56,567 --> 00:09:58,195 That's amazing. 206 00:09:58,195 --> 00:09:59,699 That's fuckin' hilarious. 207 00:09:59,699 --> 00:10:01,577 ‐ Yeah, I think I'm finally ready to get 208 00:10:01,577 --> 00:10:02,830 out the house again. 209 00:10:02,830 --> 00:10:04,583 ‐ I'm glad. ‐ Guess who? 210 00:10:04,583 --> 00:10:06,838 CHLOE: Um, probably some thirsty‐ass nerd 211 00:10:06,838 --> 00:10:08,591 that won't stop following me around? 212 00:10:08,591 --> 00:10:10,679 ‐ More like the person who just saved your dumb ass 213 00:10:10,679 --> 00:10:12,473 from getting locked out later. 214 00:10:12,473 --> 00:10:13,977 You dropped these at the last bar. 215 00:10:13,977 --> 00:10:15,354 ‐ You're my hero. ‐ I know. 216 00:10:15,354 --> 00:10:17,108 ‐ I love you so much. 217 00:10:17,108 --> 00:10:18,360 Misty, do you know Yuejin? 218 00:10:18,360 --> 00:10:20,574 She just transferred here from New York City! 219 00:10:20,574 --> 00:10:22,118 She's fancy! 220 00:10:22,118 --> 00:10:25,207 ‐ No, I don't think‐‐ I don't think we've met. 221 00:10:25,207 --> 00:10:26,251 ‐ We have. 222 00:10:26,251 --> 00:10:27,921 I'm in three of your classes. 223 00:10:27,921 --> 00:10:29,717 SHAUNA: Meet Yuejin. 224 00:10:29,717 --> 00:10:31,303 She is kind of a bitch, 225 00:10:31,303 --> 00:10:33,182 always down for a good time, 226 00:10:33,182 --> 00:10:35,854 and has a closet full of clothes in Chloe's size. 227 00:10:35,854 --> 00:10:39,612 All the makings of a brand‐new sidekick. 228 00:10:39,612 --> 00:10:41,949 ‐ Weird. 229 00:10:41,949 --> 00:10:43,368 ‐ You're gonna love her. 230 00:10:43,368 --> 00:10:45,832 She's the third Musketeer. 231 00:10:45,832 --> 00:10:47,001 SHAUNA: Oh yeah. 232 00:10:47,001 --> 00:10:49,464 Misty's definitely being replaced. 233 00:10:49,464 --> 00:10:50,717 ‐ Great! 234 00:10:50,717 --> 00:10:52,345 Welcome to the group. 235 00:10:52,345 --> 00:10:54,265 ‐ Thanks. 236 00:10:54,265 --> 00:10:55,519 SHAUNA: By the way, 237 00:10:55,519 --> 00:10:56,771 I promise I'm in the story. 238 00:10:56,771 --> 00:10:58,273 Just wait. 239 00:10:58,273 --> 00:11:00,779 ‐ For the queen of the bar. 240 00:11:00,779 --> 00:11:02,156 Sorry, they told me to say that. 241 00:11:02,156 --> 00:11:04,035 ‐ Who did? 242 00:11:04,035 --> 00:11:08,418 ♪ 243 00:11:08,418 --> 00:11:09,880 ‐ Fucking gross. 244 00:11:09,880 --> 00:11:11,258 ‐ Who, Aaron? 245 00:11:11,258 --> 00:11:12,761 ‐ Wait, you know Aaron already? 246 00:11:12,761 --> 00:11:14,264 ‐ Yeah. I go here. 247 00:11:14,264 --> 00:11:16,769 ♪ 248 00:11:16,769 --> 00:11:18,397 SHAUNA: Aaron Hamilton. 249 00:11:18,397 --> 00:11:20,610 President of Beta Sigma Eta. 250 00:11:20,610 --> 00:11:22,488 He and the rest of these walking boners 251 00:11:22,488 --> 00:11:25,160 call themselves the Wolf Pack. 252 00:11:25,160 --> 00:11:26,288 Barf. 253 00:11:26,288 --> 00:11:28,166 Supposedly, they throw the best parties, 254 00:11:28,166 --> 00:11:30,296 but they've also got a reputation, 255 00:11:30,296 --> 00:11:31,799 the bad kind. 256 00:11:31,799 --> 00:11:36,308 ♪ 257 00:11:36,308 --> 00:11:37,936 ‐ Chloe. 258 00:11:37,936 --> 00:11:40,024 What are you doing? ‐ Huh? 259 00:11:40,024 --> 00:11:42,194 ‐ Chloe! ‐ What? 260 00:11:42,194 --> 00:11:45,785 No‐‐ugh, no, Misty, he's not like sexually harassing me 261 00:11:45,785 --> 00:11:47,204 or something. 262 00:11:47,204 --> 00:11:48,833 ‐ Aaron is a sex offender. 263 00:11:48,833 --> 00:11:51,004 Okay? And that pigfuck next to him, 264 00:11:51,004 --> 00:11:52,173 his name is Michael, 265 00:11:52,173 --> 00:11:53,801 and you guys don't‐‐ ‐ We're not gonna do this 266 00:11:53,801 --> 00:11:55,555 tonight, Misty, okay? 267 00:11:55,555 --> 00:11:57,016 I'm not gonna ruin our St. Patrick's Day 268 00:11:57,016 --> 00:12:01,441 by drinking a roofied green martini at 10:05 p. m. 269 00:12:01,441 --> 00:12:03,696 (drink trickling) 270 00:12:03,696 --> 00:12:04,573 Bye‐bye. 271 00:12:04,573 --> 00:12:06,201 [giggling] ‐ Chloe! 272 00:12:06,201 --> 00:12:08,957 Oh my God. 273 00:12:08,957 --> 00:12:10,459 CHLOE: But we do have to take a picture. 274 00:12:10,459 --> 00:12:11,921 ‐ Of what? ‐ Of us! 275 00:12:11,921 --> 00:12:13,423 While we're so cute, 276 00:12:13,423 --> 00:12:15,720 before we're tear‐streaked vomit goblins. 277 00:12:15,720 --> 00:12:17,098 ‐ Yeah! ‐ Okay. 278 00:12:17,098 --> 00:12:19,060 ‐ Yeah, we haven't taken one in a long time. 279 00:12:19,060 --> 00:12:20,354 Yeah. Will you take it, please? 280 00:12:20,354 --> 00:12:22,483 CHLOE: No, no, no, all of us. 281 00:12:22,483 --> 00:12:23,360 Yeah. 282 00:12:23,360 --> 00:12:24,445 And you have the longest arms, 283 00:12:24,445 --> 00:12:27,619 you should be the one to take it. 284 00:12:27,619 --> 00:12:29,247 ‐ Okay. 285 00:12:29,247 --> 00:12:31,502 PARTIER: Yeah, St. Paddy! 286 00:12:31,502 --> 00:12:33,715 YUEJIN: What? Who's "Drug Dealer"? 287 00:12:33,715 --> 00:12:34,925 ‐ Oh, I need this. 288 00:12:34,925 --> 00:12:36,052 SHAUNA: For real? 289 00:12:36,052 --> 00:12:38,558 I'm actually "Drug Dealer" in your phone? 290 00:12:38,558 --> 00:12:40,310 See? What'd I tell ya? 291 00:12:40,310 --> 00:12:41,731 Yours truly. 292 00:12:41,731 --> 00:12:45,362 ‐ Get in this pic! ‐ No, no, hard pass. 293 00:12:45,362 --> 00:12:46,489 The more selfies you take, 294 00:12:46,489 --> 00:12:47,743 the more data AI has to create deep fakes 295 00:12:47,743 --> 00:12:51,332 with your images. 296 00:12:51,332 --> 00:12:53,211 So. 297 00:12:53,211 --> 00:12:54,380 Anyway, uh... 298 00:12:54,380 --> 00:12:55,717 let's get this underway, yeah? 299 00:12:55,717 --> 00:12:57,512 CHLOE: Yeah, yeah. ‐ Cool. 300 00:12:57,512 --> 00:12:58,639 Uh, actually, maybe you wanna go somewhere 301 00:12:58,639 --> 00:13:00,142 less public? 302 00:13:00,142 --> 00:13:02,731 ‐ It's St. Patrick's Day, nobody gives a shit. 303 00:13:02,731 --> 00:13:05,737 (rock music plays in bar) 304 00:13:05,737 --> 00:13:08,492 SHAUNA: All right, here's a little pick‐me‐up... 305 00:13:08,492 --> 00:13:09,787 ‐ Okay. 306 00:13:09,787 --> 00:13:12,876 SHAUNA:...for the Queen of the Crawl. 307 00:13:12,876 --> 00:13:15,590 Thanks. ‐ Thanks! 308 00:13:15,590 --> 00:13:17,259 Who wants Adderall? 309 00:13:17,259 --> 00:13:19,097 Gonna be a long fuckin' night. 310 00:13:19,097 --> 00:13:20,642 MALE PATRON: Hey, over here! 311 00:13:20,642 --> 00:13:22,394 ♪ 312 00:13:22,394 --> 00:13:24,273 ‐ Hey. 313 00:13:24,273 --> 00:13:26,152 You ever open one of those things up? 314 00:13:26,152 --> 00:13:27,781 They got like tiny little microchips in there 315 00:13:27,781 --> 00:13:30,035 that track your location, habit of use, 316 00:13:30,035 --> 00:13:31,622 conversations, everything. 317 00:13:31,622 --> 00:13:34,127 ‐ Isn't your phone doing that anyway? 318 00:13:34,127 --> 00:13:36,297 ‐ No. 319 00:13:36,297 --> 00:13:37,634 ‐ Whoa. 320 00:13:37,634 --> 00:13:38,928 ‐ Who are you? 321 00:13:38,928 --> 00:13:40,264 ‐ I'm a local caregiver. 322 00:13:40,264 --> 00:13:41,642 It's my job to stay woke. 323 00:13:41,642 --> 00:13:44,188 Yeah, so I'm obviously not like these princesses. 324 00:13:44,188 --> 00:13:45,567 I actually grew up in this town, 325 00:13:45,567 --> 00:13:47,654 and some of us need to work for a living. 326 00:13:47,654 --> 00:13:49,073 Plus, your girl here's off the grid, 327 00:13:49,073 --> 00:13:52,831 so that sort of limits the professional options. 328 00:13:52,831 --> 00:13:56,129 But you can call me Shauna. 329 00:13:56,129 --> 00:13:57,799 ‐ It's a weird‐ass holiday. 330 00:13:57,799 --> 00:13:59,553 ‐ I know, as if white people didn't have 331 00:13:59,553 --> 00:14:02,433 enough days on the calendar to act like complete morons. 332 00:14:02,433 --> 00:14:04,312 SHAUNA: If you wanna have some real fun, 333 00:14:04,312 --> 00:14:06,441 I have this organic weed that's grown 334 00:14:06,441 --> 00:14:07,944 out by the clover fields, 335 00:14:07,944 --> 00:14:10,073 so it's laced with radiation from that meteor that landed 336 00:14:10,073 --> 00:14:11,660 there 40 years ago. 337 00:14:11,660 --> 00:14:13,413 That's a true story. Back in the '70s, 338 00:14:13,413 --> 00:14:15,668 this huge rock crashed on the edge of town 339 00:14:15,668 --> 00:14:17,589 and my mom swears it was actually carrying 340 00:14:17,589 --> 00:14:19,718 larval stage extraterrestrial metamorphs. 341 00:14:19,718 --> 00:14:21,471 The whole thing is a big government cover‐up, 342 00:14:21,471 --> 00:14:26,189 but...I'm getting ahead of myself. 343 00:14:26,189 --> 00:14:28,736 MALE PATRON: Oh, I got something Irish for you. 344 00:14:28,736 --> 00:14:30,740 ‐ Oh, you're serious. 345 00:14:30,740 --> 00:14:32,493 ‐ Yeah. 346 00:14:32,493 --> 00:14:36,251 ‐ Mm, I'm good, no thanks. 347 00:14:36,251 --> 00:14:37,336 ‐ Okay. 348 00:14:37,336 --> 00:14:40,217 Cool, uh...well, I'm gonna go, 349 00:14:40,217 --> 00:14:42,847 see if my sales pick up. 350 00:14:42,847 --> 00:14:44,308 Keep an eye out. 351 00:14:44,308 --> 00:14:45,979 ‐ For what? ‐ For what? 352 00:14:45,979 --> 00:14:48,108 [in suspenseful whisper] ‐ The end of the world! 353 00:14:48,108 --> 00:14:50,487 ♪ 354 00:14:50,487 --> 00:14:52,074 ‐ The end of the world! 355 00:14:52,074 --> 00:14:53,577 (laughter) 356 00:14:53,577 --> 00:14:56,332 ‐ Listen up, you drunk motherfuckers. 357 00:14:56,332 --> 00:14:59,255 It's time for the tournament to begin. 358 00:14:59,255 --> 00:15:01,844 (cheering) 359 00:15:01,844 --> 00:15:03,514 And we'll begin as we always do 360 00:15:03,514 --> 00:15:06,352 with a little game I like to call 361 00:15:06,352 --> 00:15:07,856 the Troubles. 362 00:15:07,856 --> 00:15:09,609 (cheering) 363 00:15:09,609 --> 00:15:15,245 ♪ 364 00:15:15,245 --> 00:15:16,874 ‐ What's the Troubles? 365 00:15:16,874 --> 00:15:18,627 ‐ You'll see. 366 00:15:18,627 --> 00:15:21,132 (rock music) 367 00:15:21,132 --> 00:15:23,512 ♪ 368 00:15:23,512 --> 00:15:26,602 CHLOE: Get in there, girl! 369 00:15:26,602 --> 00:15:28,773 Focus, focus... 370 00:15:28,773 --> 00:15:30,526 That's it! 371 00:15:30,526 --> 00:15:31,862 Yes, bitch, yes! 372 00:15:31,862 --> 00:15:33,490 You're getting it, you're getting it. 373 00:15:33,490 --> 00:15:37,164 ♪ 374 00:15:37,164 --> 00:15:39,920 Wait‐‐anarchy, anarchy! 375 00:15:39,920 --> 00:15:41,047 Switch sides, switch sides. 376 00:15:41,047 --> 00:15:42,550 You have to go to the other side. 377 00:15:42,550 --> 00:15:44,178 Bitch, go to the other side! 378 00:15:44,178 --> 00:15:45,556 ‐ Why? Where? 379 00:15:45,556 --> 00:15:47,936 ♪ 380 00:15:47,936 --> 00:15:50,440 Okay, go! 381 00:15:50,440 --> 00:15:52,654 CHLOE: That's it, that's it, that's it! 382 00:15:52,654 --> 00:15:53,948 (shouting, clamor) 383 00:15:53,948 --> 00:15:56,411 Get on your knees! You're a leprechaun! 384 00:15:56,411 --> 00:15:59,543 ♪ 385 00:15:59,543 --> 00:16:03,174 We got it! Pot of gold! Throw your cups! Pot of gold! 386 00:16:08,184 --> 00:16:10,898 She's cool, right? 387 00:16:10,898 --> 00:16:13,696 ‐ Yeah, she's okay. 388 00:16:13,696 --> 00:16:15,783 ‐ That's high praise coming from you. 389 00:16:15,783 --> 00:16:17,954 ♪ 390 00:16:17,954 --> 00:16:21,545 You should come to New York City with us. 391 00:16:21,545 --> 00:16:23,423 ‐ What? ‐ For spring break. 392 00:16:23,423 --> 00:16:25,928 Her dad has a penthouse or something in Central Park. 393 00:16:25,928 --> 00:16:28,099 It's gonna be fun. 394 00:16:28,099 --> 00:16:29,477 ‐ What happened to Cancun? 395 00:16:29,477 --> 00:16:32,107 ‐ I don't know, Cancun's kinda like played‐out, and 396 00:16:32,107 --> 00:16:33,485 I didn't know if that'd be your vibe 397 00:16:33,485 --> 00:16:35,322 'cause of your funk. 398 00:16:35,322 --> 00:16:38,119 ‐ My funk? CHLOE: Yeah. 399 00:16:38,119 --> 00:16:40,123 Thought you weren't in the mood to party. 400 00:16:40,123 --> 00:16:41,502 ‐ Chloe! 401 00:16:41,502 --> 00:16:42,879 Michael drugged me. 402 00:16:42,879 --> 00:16:44,966 I don't know what happened to me that night. 403 00:16:44,966 --> 00:16:47,179 But I know that there was something in my drink, 404 00:16:47,179 --> 00:16:48,557 I know that for a fact, 405 00:16:48,557 --> 00:16:51,354 and I know that Michael didn't just tuck me into bed 406 00:16:51,354 --> 00:16:53,233 and watch me sleep. 407 00:16:53,233 --> 00:16:56,990 Shit, I'm sorry if I've been in a funk. 408 00:16:56,990 --> 00:16:58,994 ‐ Yeah, well that's all I mean. 409 00:16:58,994 --> 00:17:03,127 (chanting, cheering) 410 00:17:03,127 --> 00:17:04,881 ‐ You don't believe that happened to me, do you? 411 00:17:04,881 --> 00:17:06,384 ‐ Of course I do. 412 00:17:06,384 --> 00:17:08,054 ‐ Yeah, I keep hearing you say that, 413 00:17:08,054 --> 00:17:09,306 but I don't see it. 414 00:17:09,306 --> 00:17:11,143 ‐ Well, I just don't know what to do about it. 415 00:17:11,143 --> 00:17:12,689 All I can think to do is be positive, 416 00:17:12,689 --> 00:17:15,443 which I'm doing, but it doesn't seem to be helping. 417 00:17:15,443 --> 00:17:18,074 Plus, the Beta guys aren't all bad. 418 00:17:18,074 --> 00:17:19,911 And I've been hanging out with Yuejin lately, 419 00:17:19,911 --> 00:17:22,332 which...I don't mean that in a weird way, 420 00:17:22,332 --> 00:17:24,044 like instead of you. 421 00:17:24,044 --> 00:17:25,548 ‐ No, that's great, I get it. 422 00:17:25,548 --> 00:17:27,426 Actually, keep doing that, yeah. 423 00:17:27,426 --> 00:17:29,305 You just keep hanging with your new best friend 424 00:17:29,305 --> 00:17:32,436 and staying positive, okay? 425 00:17:32,436 --> 00:17:34,315 ‐ Misty. 426 00:17:34,315 --> 00:17:36,319 Girl! 427 00:17:36,319 --> 00:17:39,074 (subdued music) 428 00:17:39,074 --> 00:17:41,913 (sighs) 429 00:17:41,913 --> 00:17:47,592 ♪ 430 00:17:47,592 --> 00:17:51,098 (thudding, groaning) 431 00:17:51,098 --> 00:17:53,102 (sharp thud) 432 00:17:53,102 --> 00:17:55,231 (groaning) 433 00:17:55,231 --> 00:17:57,486 ‐ Is everything okay in there? 434 00:17:57,486 --> 00:18:00,618 (clattering) 435 00:18:00,618 --> 00:18:03,498 ("The Rattlin' Bog" plays from bar) 436 00:18:03,498 --> 00:18:06,337 (eerie music) 437 00:18:06,337 --> 00:18:12,349 ♪ 438 00:18:16,858 --> 00:18:19,363 (water running) 439 00:18:19,363 --> 00:18:21,618 ♪ 440 00:18:21,618 --> 00:18:23,831 (thud) 441 00:18:23,831 --> 00:18:29,718 ♪ 442 00:18:29,718 --> 00:18:31,888 (sighs) 443 00:18:35,730 --> 00:18:37,525 (lively music in bar) 444 00:18:37,525 --> 00:18:39,153 ‐ Come on, St. Patrickses. 445 00:18:39,153 --> 00:18:41,407 Get those fucking snakes out of Ireland. 446 00:18:41,407 --> 00:18:44,914 Winner gets shots! 447 00:18:44,914 --> 00:18:46,292 SHAUNA: No, dude, look. 448 00:18:46,292 --> 00:18:48,630 Everybody knows that the first moon landing was faked. 449 00:18:48,630 --> 00:18:50,885 It's, like not even a conspiracy. 450 00:18:50,885 --> 00:18:52,972 It's just a cover‐up for the real shit. 451 00:18:52,972 --> 00:18:56,145 For example, did you know that Paul McCartney died 452 00:18:56,145 --> 00:18:57,774 in 1968 from a car wreck 453 00:18:57,774 --> 00:19:00,236 and they replaced him with a lookalike? 454 00:19:00,236 --> 00:19:01,782 Also, Avril Lavigne. 455 00:19:01,782 --> 00:19:05,371 Look it up. 456 00:19:05,371 --> 00:19:06,792 ‐ Can I have an Irish coffee, please? 457 00:19:06,792 --> 00:19:09,421 BARTENDER: Sure thing. 458 00:19:09,421 --> 00:19:10,800 MISTY: How's your night going? 459 00:19:10,800 --> 00:19:11,802 (blows raspberry) 460 00:19:11,802 --> 00:19:14,181 ‐ I'm not making any sales tonight. 461 00:19:14,181 --> 00:19:16,143 There's a weird spell over the town, 462 00:19:16,143 --> 00:19:17,437 it's very unusual. 463 00:19:17,437 --> 00:19:21,070 ‐ Mm. Illuminati? ‐ Or aliens. 464 00:19:21,070 --> 00:19:22,447 ‐ Ah. 465 00:19:22,447 --> 00:19:25,161 ‐ You know, some do say Saint Patrick was an alien. 466 00:19:25,161 --> 00:19:26,790 ‐ That doesn't make sense, though. 467 00:19:26,790 --> 00:19:29,169 ‐ Why? Do you not believe? 468 00:19:29,169 --> 00:19:31,298 ‐ Okay, the myth is Saint Patrick drove the snakes 469 00:19:31,298 --> 00:19:32,552 out of Ireland, right? 470 00:19:32,552 --> 00:19:35,306 But since there weren't actually any snakes in Ireland, 471 00:19:35,306 --> 00:19:38,145 shouldn't your little conspiracy theory be 472 00:19:38,145 --> 00:19:41,820 "Saint Patrick saved Ireland from aliens," 473 00:19:41,820 --> 00:19:44,199 not that he was an actual alien? 474 00:19:44,199 --> 00:19:46,203 ♪ 475 00:19:46,203 --> 00:19:48,165 SHAUNA: This is my impressed face. 476 00:19:48,165 --> 00:19:52,842 Drink it in, because you will not see it very often. 477 00:19:52,842 --> 00:19:54,971 Whatever, okay, I... I don't know. 478 00:19:54,971 --> 00:19:56,683 All I know is that there's something off 479 00:19:56,683 --> 00:19:57,977 with the group dynamics. 480 00:19:57,977 --> 00:19:59,479 When dealing with alien invasions, 481 00:19:59,479 --> 00:20:00,858 you always wanna pay attention 482 00:20:00,858 --> 00:20:02,193 to the subtle things. 483 00:20:02,193 --> 00:20:03,989 Sure, this looks like normal late stage 484 00:20:03,989 --> 00:20:05,366 adolescent fuckery, 485 00:20:05,366 --> 00:20:07,370 but something lurking just beneath the surface 486 00:20:07,370 --> 00:20:09,207 is askew. 487 00:20:09,207 --> 00:20:11,003 It's a drug dealer thing. 488 00:20:11,003 --> 00:20:12,297 I can feel it. 489 00:20:12,297 --> 00:20:16,347 I'm not in a group, so it's easy for me to see. 490 00:20:16,347 --> 00:20:19,687 ‐ Tell me about it. 491 00:20:19,687 --> 00:20:21,106 ‐ So you've noticed it too? 492 00:20:21,106 --> 00:20:22,568 ‐ Yeah. 493 00:20:22,568 --> 00:20:23,987 No‐‐I mean no. 494 00:20:23,987 --> 00:20:27,369 I don't know, maybe it's just the holiday, whatever. 495 00:20:29,999 --> 00:20:32,128 (tense music) 496 00:20:32,128 --> 00:20:36,011 ♪ 497 00:20:36,011 --> 00:20:38,015 Oh my God. 498 00:20:38,015 --> 00:20:39,727 Actually, you're right. 499 00:20:39,727 --> 00:20:41,898 Something is wrong. 500 00:20:41,898 --> 00:20:44,403 ‐ You know, my mom did see the meteor 501 00:20:44,403 --> 00:20:46,031 that landed here on St. Patrick's Day 502 00:20:46,031 --> 00:20:48,160 in 197‐‐okay. 503 00:20:48,160 --> 00:20:51,793 ♪ 504 00:20:51,793 --> 00:20:53,045 (gasps) 505 00:20:53,045 --> 00:20:54,381 ‐ Oh, sorry! 506 00:20:54,381 --> 00:20:55,216 ‐ Fuck! 507 00:20:55,216 --> 00:20:57,596 Yuejin? ‐ Yeah, it's me. 508 00:20:57,596 --> 00:20:58,724 They're making me wear this mask 509 00:20:58,724 --> 00:20:59,767 because I lost. 510 00:20:59,767 --> 00:21:01,145 I don't even know what game I was playing. 511 00:21:01,145 --> 00:21:02,732 ‐ All right, just one second, 512 00:21:02,732 --> 00:21:04,026 I just wanna talk to Chloe real quick. 513 00:21:04,026 --> 00:21:06,280 ‐ Yeah. Will you just tell her that I'm going to the next spot? 514 00:21:06,280 --> 00:21:07,365 I gotta get out of here, 515 00:21:07,365 --> 00:21:10,163 these fucking games are killing me. 516 00:21:10,163 --> 00:21:12,543 (he clears throat) 517 00:21:12,543 --> 00:21:14,296 ‐ Sorry, sorry. 518 00:21:14,296 --> 00:21:16,050 Hey. 519 00:21:16,050 --> 00:21:17,177 ‐ Oh, hi. 520 00:21:17,177 --> 00:21:18,805 ‐ Did you see Chloe over there a minute ago? 521 00:21:18,805 --> 00:21:21,686 ‐ Yeah, she just left with some dude. 522 00:21:21,686 --> 00:21:24,316 ‐ Aaron? ‐ I don't know his name. 523 00:21:24,316 --> 00:21:26,905 College guys only talk to me if they want to buy drugs. 524 00:21:26,905 --> 00:21:29,577 Guess he's a good boy. 525 00:21:29,577 --> 00:21:30,954 ‐ No, that's impossible. 526 00:21:30,954 --> 00:21:33,167 ‐ Well, I mean, unless he's buying from Whiskey Dave, 527 00:21:33,167 --> 00:21:35,379 but his shit's mostly baby laxative, 528 00:21:35,379 --> 00:21:37,383 so it's basically not doing drugs at all. 529 00:21:37,383 --> 00:21:38,762 ‐ No, no, no, I mean it's impossible that 530 00:21:38,762 --> 00:21:41,433 she would leave with that creep. 531 00:21:41,433 --> 00:21:42,812 ‐ I don't know what to tell you. 532 00:21:42,812 --> 00:21:44,816 Maybe you don't know your friend as well as you thought you did. 533 00:21:44,816 --> 00:21:46,694 (phone ringing) 534 00:21:46,694 --> 00:21:51,286 Oh, shit! Speak of the devil. 535 00:21:51,286 --> 00:21:54,084 Chloe Willis, hey girl. 536 00:21:54,084 --> 00:21:55,461 Your friend's looking for you. 537 00:21:55,461 --> 00:21:56,463 FEMALE: Now that I think about it, 538 00:21:56,463 --> 00:21:57,716 you are kinda cute. 539 00:21:57,716 --> 00:21:58,802 ‐ What is it? MALE: Oh yeah? 540 00:21:58,802 --> 00:22:00,471 FEMALE: A little bit. ‐ I don't know. 541 00:22:00,471 --> 00:22:03,687 Butt‐dial, maybe? 542 00:22:03,687 --> 00:22:05,106 ‐ Chlo? 543 00:22:05,106 --> 00:22:06,693 MALE: Well, maybe your friends just wanted me for themselves. 544 00:22:06,693 --> 00:22:08,487 FEMALE: I'm pretty sure‐‐ ‐ Chloe? 545 00:22:08,487 --> 00:22:11,744 MALE: Do you always‐‐ SHAUNA: Uh, hey! 546 00:22:11,744 --> 00:22:12,997 Hello? 547 00:22:12,997 --> 00:22:14,584 That's my phone! 548 00:22:14,584 --> 00:22:16,838 (muffled phone chatter continues) 549 00:22:16,838 --> 00:22:19,594 ‐ Chloe, where are you? 550 00:22:19,594 --> 00:22:21,598 Hey. Have you seen Chloe? 551 00:22:21,598 --> 00:22:24,311 FEMALE: Stop it! We are in... 552 00:22:24,311 --> 00:22:25,981 ‐ Chlo, where are you? 553 00:22:25,981 --> 00:22:27,358 ‐ Hey, what the hell? 554 00:22:27,358 --> 00:22:29,697 ‐ Come on, whoa! ‐ It's Misty! 555 00:22:29,697 --> 00:22:32,243 (dark music) 556 00:22:32,243 --> 00:22:33,120 Hey. 557 00:22:33,120 --> 00:22:34,874 Have you guys seen Chloe? 558 00:22:34,874 --> 00:22:36,001 ‐ No. 559 00:22:36,001 --> 00:22:37,713 ♪ 560 00:22:37,713 --> 00:22:39,382 ‐ Sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry. 561 00:22:39,382 --> 00:22:41,136 Chloe, fuck! Sorry. 562 00:22:41,136 --> 00:22:43,015 ♪ 563 00:22:43,015 --> 00:22:46,146 (muffled phone chatter continues) 564 00:22:46,146 --> 00:22:47,398 FEMALE: Quit fucking following me 565 00:22:47,398 --> 00:22:48,652 and let go of me. 566 00:22:48,652 --> 00:22:50,656 MALE: Let's go. FEMALE: Let go of me. 567 00:22:50,656 --> 00:22:51,866 I said let go of me. 568 00:22:51,866 --> 00:22:53,745 I'm not playing anymore, let go of me. 569 00:22:53,745 --> 00:22:55,164 ‐ Chloe, listen to my voice. 570 00:22:55,164 --> 00:22:56,626 I'm right here and I'm not leaving, okay? 571 00:22:56,626 --> 00:22:58,170 Just tell me where you are! 572 00:22:58,170 --> 00:22:59,715 FEMALE: Get off of me! MALE: Stop fighting. 573 00:22:59,715 --> 00:23:01,260 FEMALE: Stop and let go of me! 574 00:23:01,260 --> 00:23:03,515 Help! Let go of me! 575 00:23:03,515 --> 00:23:05,519 Let go of me! Help! 576 00:23:05,519 --> 00:23:06,604 Help! 577 00:23:06,604 --> 00:23:09,860 ♪ 578 00:23:09,860 --> 00:23:10,988 (call disconnects) 579 00:23:10,988 --> 00:23:13,785 ♪ 580 00:23:13,785 --> 00:23:15,998 (distant ringtone) 581 00:23:15,998 --> 00:23:17,417 ‐ Chloe! 582 00:23:17,417 --> 00:23:23,429 ♪ 583 00:23:28,063 --> 00:23:29,274 SHAUNA: Hey! What the fuck? 584 00:23:29,274 --> 00:23:30,569 Gimme back my phone. 585 00:23:30,569 --> 00:23:32,531 ‐ Fuck. Fuck, she's gone. 586 00:23:32,531 --> 00:23:35,579 That fuckhead took her, fuck! ‐ Okay, okay, slow down. 587 00:23:35,579 --> 00:23:37,206 ‐ Fuck, that fuckhead! 588 00:23:37,206 --> 00:23:38,793 Fuck! She was flirting with him in the bar, 589 00:23:38,793 --> 00:23:40,797 and then‐‐and look. 590 00:23:40,797 --> 00:23:42,760 ‐ What, she's a Gemini? ‐ She doesn't just 591 00:23:42,760 --> 00:23:44,304 drop her phone! Fuck! 592 00:23:44,304 --> 00:23:46,684 ‐ Okay, calm down. 593 00:23:46,684 --> 00:23:48,062 Can I please just have my phone back? 594 00:23:48,062 --> 00:23:49,940 ‐ Fuck your phone, are you kidding? 595 00:23:49,940 --> 00:23:52,195 SHAUNA: Okay, uh, do you wanna call the cops? 596 00:23:52,195 --> 00:23:53,948 Because if you do, I can't really be here, 597 00:23:53,948 --> 00:23:56,078 due to all the, you know, drug dealing. 598 00:23:56,078 --> 00:23:58,457 ‐ Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. SHAUNA: Look. 599 00:23:58,457 --> 00:24:00,712 I don't have Prozac because it's not really 600 00:24:00,712 --> 00:24:03,342 the business model, but here, take this. 601 00:24:03,342 --> 00:24:04,427 ‐ What? No! 602 00:24:04,427 --> 00:24:07,433 ‐ It's Xanax, you need to calm down. 603 00:24:07,433 --> 00:24:08,227 ‐ Oh man. SHAUNA: All right, look, look, 604 00:24:08,227 --> 00:24:09,479 listen‐‐hey, listen, 605 00:24:09,479 --> 00:24:11,108 I know what a panic attack looks like, all right? 606 00:24:11,108 --> 00:24:13,613 Just trust me. Take this. 607 00:24:13,613 --> 00:24:15,491 (Misty pants) 608 00:24:15,491 --> 00:24:19,750 ♪ 609 00:24:19,750 --> 00:24:21,671 MISTY: I'd call the cops but I can't. 610 00:24:21,671 --> 00:24:22,965 ‐ Why not? 611 00:24:22,965 --> 00:24:24,092 MISTY: I take it you've never dealt with the cops 612 00:24:24,092 --> 00:24:26,597 in a situation like this before. 613 00:24:26,597 --> 00:24:28,475 ‐ I try not to, but yes, 614 00:24:28,475 --> 00:24:30,689 I have dealt with the cops a time or two. 615 00:24:30,689 --> 00:24:32,108 ‐ That's not what I mean! 616 00:24:32,108 --> 00:24:33,736 Fuck! If I call 9‐1‐1 and tell them I saw 617 00:24:33,736 --> 00:24:36,116 a drunk frat guy flirting with my drunk friend at a bar, 618 00:24:36,116 --> 00:24:38,245 they're gonna tell me that's what college kids do. 619 00:24:38,245 --> 00:24:40,332 If I tell them I actually didn't see anything 620 00:24:40,332 --> 00:24:41,878 and I have no idea where they went, 621 00:24:41,878 --> 00:24:43,506 they're gonna start calling me "young lady" 622 00:24:43,506 --> 00:24:45,134 and asking if I've been drinking too 623 00:24:45,134 --> 00:24:47,764 or taking some of the drugs you just gave me, for example. 624 00:24:47,764 --> 00:24:49,017 SHAUNA: True. 625 00:24:49,017 --> 00:24:51,981 It is hard to get people to believe what they don't see, 626 00:24:51,981 --> 00:24:56,364 and by the time they do, it's usually too late. 627 00:24:56,364 --> 00:24:57,534 ‐ Oh shit. 628 00:24:57,534 --> 00:24:58,870 Oh my God, no! 629 00:24:58,870 --> 00:25:00,247 He probably took her back to that ratfuck cesspool 630 00:25:00,247 --> 00:25:02,043 ‐ of a frat house. ‐ Okay. 631 00:25:02,043 --> 00:25:06,134 So do you wanna go and check if she's there? 632 00:25:06,134 --> 00:25:07,261 ‐ Shit. 633 00:25:07,261 --> 00:25:09,767 No, I would, but... 634 00:25:09,767 --> 00:25:11,269 no, no, I can't. 635 00:25:11,269 --> 00:25:14,025 If I... 636 00:25:14,025 --> 00:25:16,029 Fuck. I'm sorry. 637 00:25:16,029 --> 00:25:19,410 ‐ It's fine. 638 00:25:19,410 --> 00:25:22,918 I'm guessing you've been there before? 639 00:25:22,918 --> 00:25:27,886 ♪ 640 00:25:29,305 --> 00:25:31,309 So this is when I should have just said, 641 00:25:31,309 --> 00:25:32,436 "Have a great night! 642 00:25:32,436 --> 00:25:33,815 Good luck finding your horrible friend," 643 00:25:33,815 --> 00:25:35,192 and gone back to my normal life 644 00:25:35,192 --> 00:25:37,071 of not dealing with other people's shit. 645 00:25:37,071 --> 00:25:39,450 But, fuck! Look at this crying mess. 646 00:25:39,450 --> 00:25:41,288 I mean, I'm tough, but I'm not made of stone. 647 00:25:41,288 --> 00:25:42,708 Plus, business was slow 648 00:25:42,708 --> 00:25:44,670 and the Beta boys are always willing to pay double, 649 00:25:44,670 --> 00:25:47,801 so what the hell. 650 00:25:47,801 --> 00:25:50,557 Um, mm‐kay, fine. 651 00:25:50,557 --> 00:25:52,686 I'm coming with you. 652 00:25:52,686 --> 00:25:54,022 I'm coming with you. Let's go. 653 00:25:54,022 --> 00:25:56,569 ♪ 654 00:25:56,569 --> 00:25:57,904 ‐ Wait. 655 00:25:57,904 --> 00:26:02,664 ♪ 656 00:26:02,664 --> 00:26:05,210 SHAUNA: Oh, good. The Beta boys are still getting smashed 657 00:26:05,210 --> 00:26:06,589 on the pub crawl. 658 00:26:06,589 --> 00:26:10,471 ♪ 659 00:26:10,471 --> 00:26:11,473 You coming? 660 00:26:11,473 --> 00:26:14,354 ♪ 661 00:26:14,354 --> 00:26:19,113 Hey, what happened here? 662 00:26:19,113 --> 00:26:21,994 ‐ I don't remember. 663 00:26:21,994 --> 00:26:23,455 It's kinda part of the problem? 664 00:26:23,455 --> 00:26:24,833 You know, you can't file a police report 665 00:26:24,833 --> 00:26:27,964 if you don't know what you're filing it about. 666 00:26:27,964 --> 00:26:31,096 I just‐‐I woke up here once, and... 667 00:26:31,096 --> 00:26:35,437 ♪ 668 00:26:35,437 --> 00:26:39,863 ...all I know is nothing good happens in that house, so. 669 00:26:39,863 --> 00:26:43,120 SHAUNA: Yeah. I've heard the stories. 670 00:26:43,120 --> 00:26:45,709 MISTY: No one listened. ‐ Okay. 671 00:26:45,709 --> 00:26:50,217 Well...I believe you. 672 00:26:50,217 --> 00:26:55,854 And I'm not scared of shit in this world, so... 673 00:26:55,854 --> 00:26:57,398 Come on. 674 00:26:57,398 --> 00:26:59,235 Let's go get your friend. 675 00:26:59,235 --> 00:27:02,617 ♪ 676 00:27:02,617 --> 00:27:05,665 Uh, yeah, hi. Believe women, it's 2020. 677 00:27:05,665 --> 00:27:07,627 And besides, no one ever listens to me 678 00:27:07,627 --> 00:27:08,880 when I say shit, 679 00:27:08,880 --> 00:27:11,134 so I know how fucking infuriating it is. 680 00:27:11,134 --> 00:27:17,146 ♪ 681 00:27:26,414 --> 00:27:27,793 Okay, where are the bedrooms? 682 00:27:27,793 --> 00:27:30,047 MISTY: Through there. 683 00:27:30,047 --> 00:27:33,888 (muted rap music playing) 684 00:27:33,888 --> 00:27:35,683 SHAUNA: What is that? 685 00:27:35,683 --> 00:27:38,396 (tense music) 686 00:27:38,396 --> 00:27:39,566 ‐ Shauna. 687 00:27:39,566 --> 00:27:42,531 ♪ 688 00:27:42,531 --> 00:27:44,158 Shauna! 689 00:27:44,158 --> 00:27:50,170 ♪ 690 00:27:54,303 --> 00:27:56,642 (Shauna exhales with relief) 691 00:27:56,642 --> 00:27:59,063 (muted rap music plays) 692 00:27:59,063 --> 00:28:00,315 (dramatic tone) 693 00:28:00,315 --> 00:28:03,446 ‐ Can I help you girls? 694 00:28:03,446 --> 00:28:04,658 SHAUNA: Michael. 695 00:28:04,658 --> 00:28:06,452 The biggest asshole of them all. 696 00:28:06,452 --> 00:28:08,708 Apparently, his dad's some bigshot lawyer 697 00:28:08,708 --> 00:28:11,087 so he thinks he can get away with anything. 698 00:28:11,087 --> 00:28:14,720 Can you believe he specifically asked for roofies once? 699 00:28:14,720 --> 00:28:16,180 Fucking moron. 700 00:28:16,180 --> 00:28:17,474 I sold him a bottle of Tic Tacs 701 00:28:17,474 --> 00:28:20,355 and I said they were horse tranquilizers. 702 00:28:20,355 --> 00:28:22,484 ‐ Well, well, well. 703 00:28:22,484 --> 00:28:24,447 Misty Carpenter. 704 00:28:24,447 --> 00:28:26,117 It's great to see you again. 705 00:28:26,117 --> 00:28:27,621 I been meaning to have a civilized conversation 706 00:28:27,621 --> 00:28:30,083 with you about some of the things that you said about me. 707 00:28:30,083 --> 00:28:32,004 SHAUNA: No, dude, we're looking for Aaron. 708 00:28:32,004 --> 00:28:33,674 Very important matters. 709 00:28:33,674 --> 00:28:34,968 ‐ Well, he's busy. 710 00:28:34,968 --> 00:28:36,220 ‐ Where is he? 711 00:28:36,220 --> 00:28:37,849 ‐ He's upstairs. 712 00:28:37,849 --> 00:28:39,477 Uh, afraid I can't let you do that. 713 00:28:39,477 --> 00:28:41,105 ‐ Why not? 714 00:28:41,105 --> 00:28:45,615 ‐ Like I said, he's busy. SHAUNA: All right, dude, look. 715 00:28:45,615 --> 00:28:47,117 You like Molly? 716 00:28:47,117 --> 00:28:49,623 Here you go. 717 00:28:49,623 --> 00:28:50,833 ‐ You're good. ‐ Great. 718 00:28:50,833 --> 00:28:53,129 MICHAEL: Not her. 719 00:28:53,129 --> 00:28:57,514 I need to clear up a few things before we welcome you back here. 720 00:28:57,514 --> 00:29:03,108 ♪ 721 00:29:03,108 --> 00:29:04,485 (rattling pill bottle) 722 00:29:04,485 --> 00:29:06,030 ‐ How about now? 723 00:29:06,030 --> 00:29:11,040 ♪ 724 00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:12,251 ‐ Fine. 725 00:29:12,251 --> 00:29:15,717 ♪ 726 00:29:15,717 --> 00:29:16,969 Misty! 727 00:29:16,969 --> 00:29:19,725 ♪ 728 00:29:19,725 --> 00:29:22,731 You ever wanna grab a coffee and chat, 729 00:29:22,731 --> 00:29:24,358 just let me know. 730 00:29:24,358 --> 00:29:30,370 ♪ 731 00:29:35,047 --> 00:29:38,428 (muted rap music plays) 732 00:29:38,428 --> 00:29:41,560 ♪ 733 00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:42,937 ‐ God, we should burn this place 734 00:29:42,937 --> 00:29:45,693 to the fucking ground. 735 00:29:45,693 --> 00:29:47,822 (knocking) 736 00:29:47,822 --> 00:29:49,576 ‐ Aaron, open the door. 737 00:29:49,576 --> 00:29:53,918 (muffled screaming) 738 00:29:53,918 --> 00:29:56,548 SHAUNA: What is it, what do you hear? 739 00:29:56,548 --> 00:29:59,178 ‐ We need to open this door. 740 00:29:59,178 --> 00:30:03,061 SHAUNA: Wait‐‐move, move, move. 741 00:30:03,061 --> 00:30:05,440 Fuck. 742 00:30:05,440 --> 00:30:07,779 MISTY: You just carry that with you? 743 00:30:07,779 --> 00:30:09,073 SHAUNA: Mama taught me a thing or two 744 00:30:09,073 --> 00:30:10,325 over the years. 745 00:30:10,325 --> 00:30:12,079 And one of them was that Boy Scouts 746 00:30:12,079 --> 00:30:16,462 aren't the only ones who should always be prepared. 747 00:30:16,462 --> 00:30:18,843 This isn't the first lock I've had to pick. 748 00:30:18,843 --> 00:30:22,600 ♪ 749 00:30:22,600 --> 00:30:24,980 (muffled screams) 750 00:30:24,980 --> 00:30:27,610 (tense music) 751 00:30:27,610 --> 00:30:33,622 ♪ 752 00:30:35,125 --> 00:30:37,589 ‐ Jesus Fuck, you gotta untie me. 753 00:30:37,589 --> 00:30:40,177 (Aaron pants) 754 00:30:40,177 --> 00:30:41,220 ‐ Where's Chloe? 755 00:30:41,220 --> 00:30:42,724 ‐ We need to get out of here right now, okay? 756 00:30:42,724 --> 00:30:44,603 MISTY: Not until you tell me what you did with her. 757 00:30:44,603 --> 00:30:46,690 AARON: Did with‐‐what the fuck are you talking about? 758 00:30:46,690 --> 00:30:48,109 ‐ Aaron, I saw you with her. 759 00:30:48,109 --> 00:30:49,613 ‐ Who? ‐ Chloe! 760 00:30:49,613 --> 00:30:50,823 ‐ Idiot. 761 00:30:50,823 --> 00:30:52,367 ‐ I don't know where Chloe is! 762 00:30:52,367 --> 00:30:53,621 You guys saw us leave the pub 763 00:30:53,621 --> 00:30:55,248 after she poured her fucking drink on the ground. 764 00:30:55,248 --> 00:30:57,252 MISTY: Right, and then you came ba‐‐ 765 00:30:57,252 --> 00:30:59,006 I saw you talking to her! 766 00:30:59,006 --> 00:31:01,385 ‐ I have no idea what you're talking about. 767 00:31:01,385 --> 00:31:03,389 I've been tied to this bed for the past couple hours. 768 00:31:03,389 --> 00:31:04,350 Look at my leg. 769 00:31:04,350 --> 00:31:05,393 Look at my leg! 770 00:31:05,393 --> 00:31:07,231 I'm lucky to be alive. 771 00:31:07,231 --> 00:31:08,651 Fucking get me out! 772 00:31:08,651 --> 00:31:10,863 MISTY: All right, I am sick of this shit, okay? 773 00:31:10,863 --> 00:31:12,115 I saw what I saw. 774 00:31:12,115 --> 00:31:13,911 I know the cops probably won't believe me 775 00:31:13,911 --> 00:31:16,541 but I don't know what else to do. 776 00:31:16,541 --> 00:31:18,545 ‐ Oh no‐‐wait, wait‐‐hey, wait. 777 00:31:18,545 --> 00:31:19,881 Wait! Wait! 778 00:31:19,881 --> 00:31:21,133 Hey, you, you! 779 00:31:21,133 --> 00:31:23,471 Okay, hi. We left, all right? 780 00:31:23,471 --> 00:31:24,766 You saw us leave the pub. 781 00:31:24,766 --> 00:31:25,851 Okay, you can ask anyone downstairs. 782 00:31:25,851 --> 00:31:26,520 We came back here right after. 783 00:31:26,520 --> 00:31:28,899 I wasn't with Chloe. 784 00:31:28,899 --> 00:31:32,740 SHAUNA: It is strange how you got here so quickly. 785 00:31:32,740 --> 00:31:34,285 ‐ Yes, yes! MISTY: Hi. 786 00:31:34,285 --> 00:31:36,372 I need to report a kidnapping. 787 00:31:36,372 --> 00:31:37,875 ‐ Fuck! MISTY: Yeah. 788 00:31:37,875 --> 00:31:39,671 At the Beta Sigma Eta house on campus. 789 00:31:39,671 --> 00:31:41,508 AARON: When's the last time that you saw me? 790 00:31:41,508 --> 00:31:43,679 ‐ I don't know, like, what, 15 minutes ago? 791 00:31:43,679 --> 00:31:44,931 AARON: And in that time, 792 00:31:44,931 --> 00:31:46,392 I got back here, I tied myself to this bed and 793 00:31:46,392 --> 00:31:47,394 bit out a chunk of my own leg? 794 00:31:47,394 --> 00:31:49,023 ‐ They're on their way. AARON: Great. 795 00:31:49,023 --> 00:31:50,400 I need to report that I was attacked 796 00:31:50,400 --> 00:31:51,570 by some crazy fucking bitch! 797 00:31:51,570 --> 00:31:52,572 SHAUNA: You know what? 798 00:31:52,572 --> 00:31:54,408 Just start from the beginning, okay? 799 00:31:54,408 --> 00:31:55,578 How did this happen? 800 00:31:55,578 --> 00:31:57,205 (he exhales deeply) 801 00:31:57,205 --> 00:31:58,416 ‐ Wait. 802 00:31:58,416 --> 00:31:59,711 You said that you saw somebody at the pub 803 00:31:59,711 --> 00:32:01,255 15 minutes ago that looked like me? 804 00:32:01,255 --> 00:32:03,176 ‐ Not someone who looked like you, asshole, 805 00:32:03,176 --> 00:32:05,639 it was you. 806 00:32:05,639 --> 00:32:07,184 ‐ Okay. 807 00:32:07,184 --> 00:32:10,065 Okay, this is gonna sound crazy. 808 00:32:10,065 --> 00:32:11,902 I brought a girl home from the pub‐‐ 809 00:32:11,902 --> 00:32:14,323 not fucking Chloe‐‐ 810 00:32:14,323 --> 00:32:17,204 and she was apparently 811 00:32:17,204 --> 00:32:21,588 into some really kinky shit. 812 00:32:21,588 --> 00:32:23,675 Things got really rough. 813 00:32:23,675 --> 00:32:25,220 You know? 814 00:32:25,220 --> 00:32:27,850 Little playful nibble here and there, 815 00:32:27,850 --> 00:32:29,979 and then she just bit into my leg. 816 00:32:29,979 --> 00:32:31,440 (flesh tearing) 817 00:32:31,440 --> 00:32:34,446 I looked down and there's a fucking chunk of my leg gone. 818 00:32:34,446 --> 00:32:35,991 (slurping gulp) 819 00:32:35,991 --> 00:32:38,204 ♪ 820 00:32:38,204 --> 00:32:41,628 And there was something weird in her eyes. 821 00:32:41,628 --> 00:32:44,216 ‐ What do you mean? 822 00:32:44,216 --> 00:32:47,682 ‐ It was like a‐‐ it was like a green cloud. 823 00:32:47,682 --> 00:32:50,604 (grunt) 824 00:32:50,604 --> 00:32:53,443 And it freaked me out, so I kicked her off me. 825 00:32:53,443 --> 00:32:55,238 (sharp thud, grunt) 826 00:32:55,238 --> 00:32:56,616 MISTY: Right. 827 00:32:56,616 --> 00:32:59,455 So where is she now? 828 00:32:59,455 --> 00:33:01,125 ‐ Well, this is the crazy part. 829 00:33:01,125 --> 00:33:03,337 ♪ 830 00:33:03,337 --> 00:33:08,473 She was on the ground and made this insane fucking sound. 831 00:33:08,473 --> 00:33:11,771 Like bones breaking. 832 00:33:11,771 --> 00:33:15,779 And then she got up, and I swear to God, 833 00:33:15,779 --> 00:33:17,783 she suddenly looked like... 834 00:33:17,783 --> 00:33:19,662 (screams) 835 00:33:19,662 --> 00:33:21,165 ‐ You? 836 00:33:21,165 --> 00:33:23,127 ‐ Yeah. Like me. 837 00:33:23,127 --> 00:33:24,881 (Misty scoffs) 838 00:33:24,881 --> 00:33:27,093 ‐ I fucking knew it, I fucking‐‐I told you, 839 00:33:27,093 --> 00:33:28,972 I told you there was something in the air tonight. 840 00:33:28,972 --> 00:33:30,099 ‐ Are you serious right now? 841 00:33:30,099 --> 00:33:31,770 You don't actually be‐ ‐ Okay. 842 00:33:31,770 --> 00:33:33,982 This...thing, where did it go? 843 00:33:33,982 --> 00:33:35,986 ‐ My boys had started knocking on the door, 844 00:33:35,986 --> 00:33:38,032 probably from all the commotion. 845 00:33:38,032 --> 00:33:41,163 It got scared and it went out the window. 846 00:33:41,163 --> 00:33:44,169 SHAUNA: This is when shit gets real. 847 00:33:44,169 --> 00:33:47,175 ♪ 848 00:33:47,175 --> 00:33:49,931 (siren wailing) 849 00:33:49,931 --> 00:33:55,943 ♪ 850 00:34:10,013 --> 00:34:11,850 What did I tell you? 851 00:34:11,850 --> 00:34:14,021 What did I tell you! 852 00:34:14,021 --> 00:34:17,903 Not zombies, no‐‐ fucking aliens. 853 00:34:17,903 --> 00:34:21,160 Right? I mean, we've been saying this the whole time. 854 00:34:21,160 --> 00:34:22,412 And it wasn't really the right time 855 00:34:22,412 --> 00:34:23,540 to revel in it, you know, 856 00:34:23,540 --> 00:34:26,546 but man, did it feel good to be right. 857 00:34:26,546 --> 00:34:28,382 And I know Misty was still all concerned 858 00:34:28,382 --> 00:34:31,890 about finding Chloe, but alien invasion happening, 859 00:34:31,890 --> 00:34:35,814 and we were right in the middle of it! 860 00:34:35,814 --> 00:34:37,693 And that's when I realized, 861 00:34:37,693 --> 00:34:41,701 oh fuck, we were right in the middle of it. 862 00:34:41,701 --> 00:34:43,705 Tonight just took a hard freakin' turn 863 00:34:43,705 --> 00:34:46,460 from rescue mission to fight for survival. 864 00:34:46,460 --> 00:34:48,674 Now, trust, I've been training for survival 865 00:34:48,674 --> 00:34:50,051 my whole life. 866 00:34:50,051 --> 00:34:52,180 But even if I could save myself, 867 00:34:52,180 --> 00:34:54,017 could I save two princesses, 868 00:34:54,017 --> 00:34:55,186 a frat guy, 869 00:34:55,186 --> 00:34:57,692 and a still missing, possibly dead party girl? 870 00:34:57,692 --> 00:35:02,033 Well, that was a different fucking story altogether. 871 00:35:02,033 --> 00:35:05,039 (mellow hip‐hop music) 872 00:35:05,039 --> 00:35:09,464 ‐ Because Jessica, she's got the bottom but not the top, 873 00:35:09,464 --> 00:35:11,427 you know? 874 00:35:11,427 --> 00:35:16,730 Little bit of this, little bit of that. 875 00:35:16,730 --> 00:35:18,984 Oh shit. DOMINIC: Yeah. 876 00:35:18,984 --> 00:35:22,115 It's okay, fellas, relax. 877 00:35:22,115 --> 00:35:25,455 St. Patrick's Day, I'm not here to ruin the party. 878 00:35:25,455 --> 00:35:27,250 ‐ Is there something we can help you with, Officer? 879 00:35:27,250 --> 00:35:29,379 ‐ Why are you guys still hanging around here? 880 00:35:29,379 --> 00:35:31,341 You guys should be out partying! 881 00:35:31,341 --> 00:35:32,970 Don't you like to party? 882 00:35:32,970 --> 00:35:35,308 ♪ 883 00:35:35,308 --> 00:35:37,938 ‐ We like to party. DOMINIC: That's good. 884 00:35:37,938 --> 00:35:39,357 Gotta follow tradition. 885 00:35:39,357 --> 00:35:40,986 Get wasted. 886 00:35:40,986 --> 00:35:42,573 Trash the town! 887 00:35:42,573 --> 00:35:43,992 MICHAEL: Yeah, we're just... 888 00:35:43,992 --> 00:35:47,123 we're just waiting for Aaron. 889 00:35:47,123 --> 00:35:49,127 ‐ You guys should head out now. 890 00:35:49,127 --> 00:35:51,508 He'll catch up with you. 891 00:35:51,508 --> 00:35:52,843 ‐ It's cool. 892 00:35:52,843 --> 00:35:55,766 We'll just wait for Aaron. ‐ No, you should go now. 893 00:35:55,766 --> 00:35:58,020 (eerie music) 894 00:35:58,020 --> 00:36:03,239 ♪ 895 00:36:03,239 --> 00:36:05,409 Come on. ‐ Yeah. 896 00:36:05,409 --> 00:36:06,996 Yeah, all right. 897 00:36:06,996 --> 00:36:09,000 We will, uh...we'll go now. 898 00:36:09,000 --> 00:36:10,504 ‐ There we go. 899 00:36:10,504 --> 00:36:11,506 St. Patrick's Day. 900 00:36:11,506 --> 00:36:13,635 I'm your cool aunt tonight, let's go. 901 00:36:13,635 --> 00:36:15,137 You left your drugs. 902 00:36:15,137 --> 00:36:17,726 Just‐‐don't look. 903 00:36:17,726 --> 00:36:20,022 All right. 904 00:36:20,022 --> 00:36:25,868 ♪ 905 00:36:25,868 --> 00:36:27,245 ‐ Please just untie me. 906 00:36:27,245 --> 00:36:29,876 I'm kinda bleeding out here and I really need to pee. 907 00:36:29,876 --> 00:36:31,295 Yes, finally. 908 00:36:31,295 --> 00:36:32,798 MISTY: Hi, hey. 909 00:36:32,798 --> 00:36:34,927 ‐ Anyone care to explain to me what's going on here? 910 00:36:34,927 --> 00:36:36,514 ‐ He kidnapped our friend. 911 00:36:36,514 --> 00:36:38,434 ‐ Kinda looks like the other way around. 912 00:36:38,434 --> 00:36:39,937 ‐ No‐‐ ‐ Who's your friend? 913 00:36:39,937 --> 00:36:40,814 MISTY: Chloe Willis. 914 00:36:40,814 --> 00:36:42,025 ‐ And where is she? 915 00:36:42,025 --> 00:36:43,319 ‐ Ask him! ‐ I'm the one that got 916 00:36:43,319 --> 00:36:44,697 attacked, sir. 917 00:36:44,697 --> 00:36:46,576 Look at me. 918 00:36:46,576 --> 00:36:48,203 ‐ Who did that? ‐ He claims that he did. 919 00:36:48,203 --> 00:36:50,959 AARON: That's not what I said. ‐ Okay, um, officer? 920 00:36:50,959 --> 00:36:52,546 ♪ 921 00:36:52,546 --> 00:36:53,673 I believe that we are in the midst 922 00:36:53,673 --> 00:36:55,426 of an alien invasion in which imposters are 923 00:36:55,426 --> 00:36:57,932 rapidly replacing the citizens of this town. 924 00:36:57,932 --> 00:37:01,940 ♪ 925 00:37:01,940 --> 00:37:04,194 DOMINIC: That's interesting. 926 00:37:04,194 --> 00:37:06,699 It sounds a little far‐fetched. 927 00:37:06,699 --> 00:37:07,952 Sure you guys aren't just drunk 928 00:37:07,952 --> 00:37:09,454 like everyone else in this town? 929 00:37:09,454 --> 00:37:13,672 SHAUNA: Something lurking just beneath the surface. 930 00:37:13,672 --> 00:37:15,049 Fucking askew. 931 00:37:15,049 --> 00:37:17,178 MISTY: No. No, no, no, no! AARON: Okay. Can you please just 932 00:37:17,178 --> 00:37:18,848 untie me, sir? 933 00:37:18,848 --> 00:37:19,976 MISTY: No! 934 00:37:19,976 --> 00:37:21,938 Um, excuse me, sorry, what are you doing? 935 00:37:21,938 --> 00:37:23,440 ‐ I'm gonna untie him. ‐ Thank you. 936 00:37:23,440 --> 00:37:25,486 MISTY: Aren't you gonna like investigate 937 00:37:25,486 --> 00:37:27,115 or something? 938 00:37:27,115 --> 00:37:29,244 DOMINIC: I'm taking him to the station. 939 00:37:29,244 --> 00:37:30,329 ‐ What? 940 00:37:30,329 --> 00:37:31,749 Why am I being arrested, for what? 941 00:37:31,749 --> 00:37:32,876 ‐ Just standard procedure. 942 00:37:32,876 --> 00:37:33,753 ‐ How is it standard procedure? 943 00:37:33,753 --> 00:37:35,089 I didn't do anything. 944 00:37:35,089 --> 00:37:36,341 ‐ Excuse me, officer, sir. 945 00:37:36,341 --> 00:37:38,680 Um, Aaron actually isn't our main concern. 946 00:37:38,680 --> 00:37:41,435 We just wanna find my friend Chloe Willis. 947 00:37:41,435 --> 00:37:42,855 ‐ We'll be on the lookout for her. 948 00:37:42,855 --> 00:37:44,817 It's a small town, I'm sure she'll turn up. 949 00:37:44,817 --> 00:37:45,736 MISTY: No, no, no, you don't understand. 950 00:37:45,736 --> 00:37:47,238 Chloe‐‐Chloe literally doesn't‐‐ 951 00:37:47,238 --> 00:37:48,867 SHAUNA: Hey, hey, hey. 952 00:37:48,867 --> 00:37:53,960 ♪ 953 00:37:53,960 --> 00:37:55,254 (Aaron exclaims) 954 00:37:55,254 --> 00:37:58,260 ‐ Dude, can you at least let me put my clothes on? 955 00:37:58,260 --> 00:38:00,974 SHAUNA: Okay, look, so what I was trying to tell you earlier 956 00:38:00,974 --> 00:38:03,395 about the meteor that landed here in 1978? 957 00:38:03,395 --> 00:38:05,525 It was on St. Patrick's Day. MISTY: Shut up! 958 00:38:05,525 --> 00:38:07,403 I don't wanna hear about some fucking conspiracy theory 959 00:38:07,403 --> 00:38:08,907 right now, I'm talking about Chloe! 960 00:38:08,907 --> 00:38:09,992 ‐ I know that! 961 00:38:09,992 --> 00:38:11,369 I am too. 962 00:38:11,369 --> 00:38:15,377 I'm talking about her and Aaron and this entire town. 963 00:38:15,377 --> 00:38:17,256 ‐ Aren't you supposed to do the whole Miranda thing? 964 00:38:17,256 --> 00:38:19,010 Am I under arrest? 965 00:38:19,010 --> 00:38:20,262 Hey. 966 00:38:20,262 --> 00:38:23,268 (thud, groan) 967 00:38:23,268 --> 00:38:24,647 Can you please just give me a first aid kit 968 00:38:24,647 --> 00:38:26,526 for my wound? ‐ Get in. 969 00:38:26,526 --> 00:38:30,407 ♪ 970 00:38:30,407 --> 00:38:31,911 ‐ Fuck! 971 00:38:31,911 --> 00:38:33,372 (thud) 972 00:38:33,372 --> 00:38:36,921 ♪ 973 00:38:36,921 --> 00:38:38,048 (Aaron yells) 974 00:38:38,048 --> 00:38:40,136 (thud) 975 00:38:40,136 --> 00:38:42,641 (sounds of struggle) 976 00:38:42,641 --> 00:38:48,653 ♪ 977 00:38:51,701 --> 00:38:53,705 (ringtone) 978 00:38:53,705 --> 00:38:55,166 ‐ Is that... 979 00:38:55,166 --> 00:38:59,508 ♪ 980 00:38:59,508 --> 00:39:00,886 YUEJIN: Chloe, are you okay? 981 00:39:00,886 --> 00:39:01,888 ‐ Yuejin, it's Misty. 982 00:39:01,888 --> 00:39:03,558 YUEJIN: Where's Chloe? 983 00:39:03,558 --> 00:39:04,935 ‐ We're trying to figure that out right now, 984 00:39:04,935 --> 00:39:06,188 I was hoping you knew. 985 00:39:06,188 --> 00:39:07,440 YUEJIN: People are losing their minds. 986 00:39:07,440 --> 00:39:09,194 I think I've seen like 12 fights break out 987 00:39:09,194 --> 00:39:10,446 in the last hour. 988 00:39:10,446 --> 00:39:11,949 I just saw someone biting a person like 989 00:39:11,949 --> 00:39:13,285 a fucking zombie movie. 990 00:39:13,285 --> 00:39:17,335 SHAUNA: No, not zombies; they're alien imposters. 991 00:39:17,335 --> 00:39:18,295 YUEJIN: What? 992 00:39:18,295 --> 00:39:20,090 Who is that? 993 00:39:20,090 --> 00:39:21,677 ‐ It's Shauna from the pub. 994 00:39:21,677 --> 00:39:22,846 ‐ Where are you right now? 995 00:39:22,846 --> 00:39:24,224 YUEJIN: I'm leaving the pub crawl. 996 00:39:24,224 --> 00:39:26,812 Seriously, it's like everyone is tripping balls 997 00:39:26,812 --> 00:39:28,190 on bath salts. 998 00:39:28,190 --> 00:39:29,568 ‐ Okay. We're at the Beta house. 999 00:39:29,568 --> 00:39:30,820 Just come meet us here. 1000 00:39:30,820 --> 00:39:32,991 YUEJIN: Okay. 1001 00:39:32,991 --> 00:39:34,578 ‐ Fuck. 1002 00:39:34,578 --> 00:39:36,248 (groans) 1003 00:39:36,248 --> 00:39:38,586 (tense music) 1004 00:39:38,586 --> 00:39:43,846 ♪ 1005 00:39:43,846 --> 00:39:45,850 ‐ Oh, fuck no. 1006 00:39:45,850 --> 00:39:47,436 (thud, grunt) 1007 00:39:47,436 --> 00:39:49,692 ♪ 1008 00:39:49,692 --> 00:39:52,488 (faint yelling) 1009 00:39:52,488 --> 00:39:54,367 ‐ Wait! 1010 00:39:54,367 --> 00:39:56,956 (thudding, squelching kicks) 1011 00:40:02,509 --> 00:40:05,515 Told you he's a psycho! 1012 00:40:05,515 --> 00:40:07,894 ‐ He's one of them, he attacked me. 1013 00:40:07,894 --> 00:40:10,650 Look‐‐come look. 1014 00:40:10,650 --> 00:40:12,361 (Aaron sighs) 1015 00:40:13,363 --> 00:40:16,912 SHAUNA: Holy shit. 1016 00:40:16,912 --> 00:40:18,248 Fuck me. 1017 00:40:18,248 --> 00:40:19,626 (Aaron sighs) 1018 00:40:19,626 --> 00:40:21,129 ♪ 1019 00:40:21,129 --> 00:40:23,342 ‐ Yup, as I suspected. 1020 00:40:23,342 --> 00:40:25,012 Imposters don't bleed red. 1021 00:40:25,012 --> 00:40:27,391 Most people would be grossed out by alien blood, 1022 00:40:27,391 --> 00:40:31,232 but this is what I call bona fide proof, y'all! 1023 00:40:31,232 --> 00:40:33,403 ‐ Can somebody please just uncuff me? 1024 00:40:33,403 --> 00:40:35,617 SHAUNA: Yeah, sorry. 1025 00:40:35,617 --> 00:40:37,036 (Misty gasps) 1026 00:40:37,036 --> 00:40:39,123 (handcuffs unlocking) 1027 00:40:39,123 --> 00:40:41,754 ♪ 1028 00:40:41,754 --> 00:40:43,423 SHAUNA: Oh, fuck. 1029 00:40:43,423 --> 00:40:46,137 ‐ All right, I don't know what the fuck is going on tonight, 1030 00:40:46,137 --> 00:40:48,183 but that's the second one that tried to attack me. 1031 00:40:48,183 --> 00:40:50,814 SHAUNA: Yup, you are lucky to be alive. 1032 00:40:50,814 --> 00:40:53,528 This alien imposter was out to kill you. 1033 00:40:53,528 --> 00:40:55,782 I'm thinking it's because the one who attacked you earlier 1034 00:40:55,782 --> 00:40:57,076 got your DNA and became you. 1035 00:40:57,076 --> 00:40:58,663 You know, that's how they operate. 1036 00:40:58,663 --> 00:41:00,416 ‐ That's impossible. 1037 00:41:00,416 --> 00:41:02,461 ‐ Not for aliens. 1038 00:41:02,461 --> 00:41:04,675 ‐ So that's who was at the pub with Chloe, my imposter. 1039 00:41:04,675 --> 00:41:06,428 ‐ That means they got Chloe. 1040 00:41:06,428 --> 00:41:08,516 ‐ Not necessarily. 1041 00:41:08,516 --> 00:41:10,269 I mean, you know, he escaped, 1042 00:41:10,269 --> 00:41:12,440 so it's possible she did too. 1043 00:41:12,440 --> 00:41:14,695 YUEJIN: Hey, Misty! ‐ Yuejin! Over here! 1044 00:41:14,695 --> 00:41:17,450 YUEJIN: What's happening, why are the cops‐‐ 1045 00:41:17,450 --> 00:41:20,790 Oh, what the fuck? 1046 00:41:20,790 --> 00:41:22,544 AARON: Yup. YUEJIN: What is that? 1047 00:41:22,544 --> 00:41:25,925 And why is he covered in green goo? 1048 00:41:25,925 --> 00:41:27,344 Hello, what the hell's going on? 1049 00:41:27,344 --> 00:41:28,806 SHAUNA: What does it look like? 1050 00:41:28,806 --> 00:41:30,727 Alien invasion, Yuejin. 1051 00:41:30,727 --> 00:41:32,606 They're finally coming out from hiding. 1052 00:41:32,606 --> 00:41:34,860 ‐ Is she still for real with this? 1053 00:41:34,860 --> 00:41:36,237 ♪ 1054 00:41:36,237 --> 00:41:37,699 ‐ Hey, wait, where are you going? 1055 00:41:37,699 --> 00:41:39,953 AARON: I need a fucking Band‐Aid. 1056 00:41:39,953 --> 00:41:45,840 ♪ 1057 00:41:45,840 --> 00:41:48,554 (Aaron groaning in pain) 1058 00:41:48,554 --> 00:41:54,482 ♪ 1059 00:41:54,482 --> 00:41:56,820 Okay, easy, easy. 1060 00:41:56,820 --> 00:41:58,616 ♪ 1061 00:41:58,616 --> 00:42:00,828 What do you think they want? 1062 00:42:00,828 --> 00:42:02,248 SHAUNA: Great question, but... 1063 00:42:02,248 --> 00:42:04,628 I'm not really concerned about that right now. 1064 00:42:04,628 --> 00:42:07,132 It's happening whether we want it to or not. 1065 00:42:07,132 --> 00:42:08,636 [sneering] ‐ Okay. 1066 00:42:08,636 --> 00:42:10,222 ♪ 1067 00:42:10,222 --> 00:42:12,017 Sorry, I just... 1068 00:42:12,017 --> 00:42:14,731 This is all completely crazy. 1069 00:42:14,731 --> 00:42:17,278 Like, I feel like I'm in someone else's acid trip. 1070 00:42:17,278 --> 00:42:18,363 Your acid trip. 1071 00:42:18,363 --> 00:42:19,658 SHAUNA: Hey, don't kill the messenger. 1072 00:42:19,658 --> 00:42:22,121 YUEJIN: No, it's gotta be something else. 1073 00:42:22,121 --> 00:42:24,166 Aliens is just absurd. 1074 00:42:24,166 --> 00:42:26,004 SHAUNA: Okay, well, you can go take a look 1075 00:42:26,004 --> 00:42:28,759 at the alien cop outside if you want more proof. 1076 00:42:28,759 --> 00:42:30,012 AARON: Oh, fuck. 1077 00:42:30,012 --> 00:42:31,347 We left him outside. 1078 00:42:31,347 --> 00:42:32,517 Somebody's gonna notice that. 1079 00:42:32,517 --> 00:42:34,730 SHAUNA: I think I know where we need to go. 1080 00:42:34,730 --> 00:42:36,859 I think we may be able to get some answers. 1081 00:42:36,859 --> 00:42:37,902 YUEJIN: To what? 1082 00:42:37,902 --> 00:42:39,865 An alien invasion? 1083 00:42:39,865 --> 00:42:41,869 ‐ And weapons. 1084 00:42:41,869 --> 00:42:42,912 ‐ Weapons? 1085 00:42:42,912 --> 00:42:44,666 SHAUNA: You can never be too prepared. 1086 00:42:44,666 --> 00:42:46,879 YUEJIN: Okay... (Aaron groans) 1087 00:42:46,879 --> 00:42:48,256 (Aaron exhales) 1088 00:42:48,256 --> 00:42:49,635 SHAUNA: Hey. 1089 00:42:49,635 --> 00:42:51,429 What do you think, Misty? 1090 00:42:51,429 --> 00:42:55,020 (Misty breathes deeply) 1091 00:42:55,020 --> 00:42:57,191 MISTY: I just...I told her 1092 00:42:57,191 --> 00:43:00,155 to stay away from them, and I... 1093 00:43:00,155 --> 00:43:02,827 I just don't get why she didn't believe me. 1094 00:43:02,827 --> 00:43:04,665 ‐ Stay away from who, the imposters? 1095 00:43:04,665 --> 00:43:06,710 ‐ No. 1096 00:43:06,710 --> 00:43:08,088 Aaron. 1097 00:43:08,088 --> 00:43:10,258 All the guys at the pub. 1098 00:43:10,258 --> 00:43:12,304 ‐ You told her to stay away from me? 1099 00:43:12,304 --> 00:43:13,390 ‐ Yeah. 1100 00:43:13,390 --> 00:43:17,691 You, Michael, all of you guys. 1101 00:43:17,691 --> 00:43:18,943 ‐ Wow. 1102 00:43:18,943 --> 00:43:22,074 So you're just... lumping us all together? 1103 00:43:22,074 --> 00:43:26,082 ‐ Well, you're, like, a frickin' pervert mafia. 1104 00:43:26,082 --> 00:43:27,459 AARON: Hey. 1105 00:43:27,459 --> 00:43:29,213 I'm not Michael. 1106 00:43:29,213 --> 00:43:30,800 ♪ 1107 00:43:30,800 --> 00:43:33,931 ‐ So then why didn't you do anything about it? 1108 00:43:33,931 --> 00:43:36,185 ♪ 1109 00:43:36,185 --> 00:43:37,229 Right. 1110 00:43:37,229 --> 00:43:38,733 AARON: Wait, Misty. 1111 00:43:38,733 --> 00:43:42,615 ♪ 1112 00:43:42,615 --> 00:43:44,995 (Misty exhales) 1113 00:43:44,995 --> 00:43:47,751 ♪ 1114 00:43:47,751 --> 00:43:49,880 (Misty sighs) 1115 00:43:49,880 --> 00:43:53,344 ♪ 1116 00:43:53,344 --> 00:43:55,808 (eerie music) 1117 00:43:55,808 --> 00:43:57,854 ♪ 1118 00:43:57,854 --> 00:44:00,108 ‐ Chloe? 1119 00:44:00,108 --> 00:44:02,488 SHAUNA: Misty, you ready to go? 1120 00:44:02,488 --> 00:44:05,578 ♪ 1121 00:44:05,578 --> 00:44:07,122 ‐ Chloe? 1122 00:44:07,122 --> 00:44:13,134 ♪ 1123 00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:23,404 (music intensifying) 1124 00:44:23,404 --> 00:44:26,035 (music softens) 1125 00:44:26,035 --> 00:44:27,539 (sighs) 1126 00:44:27,539 --> 00:44:31,295 ♪ 1127 00:44:31,295 --> 00:44:32,715 (growling) 1128 00:44:32,715 --> 00:44:33,759 Shit! 1129 00:44:33,759 --> 00:44:34,970 (intense music) 1130 00:44:34,970 --> 00:44:36,138 They're here! 1131 00:44:36,138 --> 00:44:37,474 ♪ 1132 00:44:37,474 --> 00:44:38,894 ‐ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait! 1133 00:44:38,894 --> 00:44:39,896 (growling) 1134 00:44:39,896 --> 00:44:42,276 ♪ 1135 00:44:42,276 --> 00:44:43,236 (car beeps) 1136 00:44:43,236 --> 00:44:44,531 SHAUNA: Hey, wait, wait! 1137 00:44:44,531 --> 00:44:45,908 Where's Aaron? 1138 00:44:45,908 --> 00:44:47,787 AARON [muffled]: Help! Help! 1139 00:44:47,787 --> 00:44:49,749 Somebody fucking help me! 1140 00:44:49,749 --> 00:44:51,502 Help! Help! 1141 00:44:51,502 --> 00:44:53,298 ♪ 1142 00:44:53,298 --> 00:44:54,801 (gunshot) 1143 00:44:58,684 --> 00:45:01,940 SHAUNA: Like I said, always be prepared. 1144 00:45:01,940 --> 00:45:04,028 (soft music) 1145 00:45:04,028 --> 00:45:05,948 ‐ I think I love you. 1146 00:45:05,948 --> 00:45:07,451 SHAUNA: Gross. 1147 00:45:07,451 --> 00:45:09,706 ‐ You just have a gun on you? 1148 00:45:09,706 --> 00:45:12,085 SHAUNA: Got it off the dead alien. 1149 00:45:12,085 --> 00:45:13,338 I'm driving. 1150 00:45:13,338 --> 00:45:15,509 (tense music) 1151 00:45:15,509 --> 00:45:21,521 ♪ 1152 00:45:24,819 --> 00:45:26,949 Oh, shit, get down. Get down. 1153 00:45:26,949 --> 00:45:29,078 ♪ 1154 00:45:29,078 --> 00:45:31,207 (panting) 1155 00:45:31,207 --> 00:45:36,718 ♪ 1156 00:45:36,718 --> 00:45:38,429 ‐ Should we just go? 1157 00:45:38,429 --> 00:45:41,812 ♪ 1158 00:45:41,812 --> 00:45:44,609 SHAUNA [whispering]: No, no, just stay low. 1159 00:45:44,609 --> 00:45:47,740 ♪ 1160 00:45:47,740 --> 00:45:49,368 They don't know we're here. 1161 00:45:49,368 --> 00:45:50,621 ♪ 1162 00:45:50,621 --> 00:45:53,251 ‐ So is everybody just an alien now? 1163 00:45:53,251 --> 00:45:54,587 SHAUNA: I mean, I don't know, 1164 00:45:54,587 --> 00:45:57,342 but these guys are definitely not normal humans. 1165 00:45:57,342 --> 00:45:59,848 AARON: How do you know that? 1166 00:45:59,848 --> 00:46:01,685 (thud) 1167 00:46:01,685 --> 00:46:03,564 ‐ They're loading the officer's body 1168 00:46:03,564 --> 00:46:04,858 into the truck. 1169 00:46:04,858 --> 00:46:07,487 ♪ 1170 00:46:07,487 --> 00:46:10,452 YUEJIN: How'd they know the body was here? 1171 00:46:10,452 --> 00:46:12,623 They are a hive mind. 1172 00:46:12,623 --> 00:46:13,625 ♪ 1173 00:46:13,625 --> 00:46:15,755 SHAUNA: Okay. 1174 00:46:15,755 --> 00:46:17,257 I think we're good. 1175 00:46:17,257 --> 00:46:18,761 ♪ 1176 00:46:18,761 --> 00:46:20,263 (engine starting) 1177 00:46:20,263 --> 00:46:22,100 (tires screeching) 1178 00:46:22,100 --> 00:46:28,112 ♪ 1179 00:46:44,979 --> 00:46:48,779 ‐ God, we really are in the middle of nowhere, aren't we? 1180 00:46:48,779 --> 00:46:51,910 Can't believe people actually live out here. 1181 00:46:51,910 --> 00:46:55,416 It's a real shithole. 1182 00:46:55,416 --> 00:46:57,003 SHAUNA: Yup. 1183 00:46:57,003 --> 00:47:03,015 ♪ 1184 00:47:05,646 --> 00:47:06,940 ‐ Hey. 1185 00:47:06,940 --> 00:47:10,698 Can I ask you a personal question? 1186 00:47:10,698 --> 00:47:11,950 ‐ Okay. 1187 00:47:11,950 --> 00:47:13,954 ‐ Are you really Irish? 1188 00:47:15,583 --> 00:47:17,043 ‐ What? 1189 00:47:17,043 --> 00:47:18,337 ‐ Your shirt, it says, 1190 00:47:18,337 --> 00:47:21,051 "Kiss me, I'm Irish." 1191 00:47:21,051 --> 00:47:22,429 ‐ Oh my God. 1192 00:47:23,891 --> 00:47:25,185 (Misty sighs) 1193 00:47:26,813 --> 00:47:29,151 (Aaron clears his throat) 1194 00:47:29,151 --> 00:47:30,403 ‐ Hey. 1195 00:47:30,403 --> 00:47:32,157 ‐ Dear God, what? ‐ Do you still think 1196 00:47:32,157 --> 00:47:34,286 I'm the kind of guy who would've kidnapped your friend? 1197 00:47:34,286 --> 00:47:37,793 ‐ One hundred percent. 1198 00:47:37,793 --> 00:47:41,342 AARON: I'm not like the rest of the guys in my house. 1199 00:47:42,678 --> 00:47:44,974 ‐ Aren't you, like, a registered sex offender? 1200 00:47:44,974 --> 00:47:46,227 ‐ No. 1201 00:47:46,227 --> 00:47:47,688 No, no, that's a‐‐ 1202 00:47:47,688 --> 00:47:50,443 that's a stupid rumor that started 1203 00:47:50,443 --> 00:47:53,366 after I was arrested for peeing in public. 1204 00:47:53,366 --> 00:47:56,205 ‐ What? ‐ Yeah. 1205 00:47:56,205 --> 00:47:58,376 Indecent exposure 1206 00:47:58,376 --> 00:47:59,712 is what they call it. 1207 00:47:59,712 --> 00:48:00,756 After everything with Michael, 1208 00:48:00,756 --> 00:48:03,427 I guess it was just an easy rumor to start. 1209 00:48:03,427 --> 00:48:05,599 ♪ 1210 00:48:05,599 --> 00:48:06,726 ‐ Cool. 1211 00:48:06,726 --> 00:48:09,231 I guess congratulations for not being a rapist. 1212 00:48:09,231 --> 00:48:12,195 ‐ It was actually a really good learning experience. 1213 00:48:12,195 --> 00:48:13,740 I did community service, 1214 00:48:13,740 --> 00:48:16,245 I started coaching and volunteering, 1215 00:48:16,245 --> 00:48:18,959 and I even changed my major from marketing to education. 1216 00:48:18,959 --> 00:48:20,504 ‐ What is happening right now? 1217 00:48:20,504 --> 00:48:21,965 What is this, some kind of 1218 00:48:21,965 --> 00:48:24,261 12‐Step‐for‐Misogynists thing? 1219 00:48:24,261 --> 00:48:25,639 You get a chip for each woman 1220 00:48:25,639 --> 00:48:27,727 you manage to convince you're not a monster? 1221 00:48:27,727 --> 00:48:29,731 AARON: Misty, I'm not a bad guy. 1222 00:48:29,731 --> 00:48:31,776 [sarcastically] ‐ No, of course not. 1223 00:48:31,776 --> 00:48:33,905 You just hang out with bad guys 1224 00:48:33,905 --> 00:48:36,410 and party with bad guys 1225 00:48:36,410 --> 00:48:38,414 and live with bad guys, 1226 00:48:38,414 --> 00:48:42,297 but, no, I'm sure you're not a bad guy. 1227 00:48:42,297 --> 00:48:47,390 ♪ 1228 00:48:47,390 --> 00:48:50,021 ‐ You know what, you're right. 1229 00:48:50,021 --> 00:48:51,775 I fucked up, okay? 1230 00:48:51,775 --> 00:48:56,158 I should've done something, and I didn't. 1231 00:48:56,158 --> 00:48:58,412 I need to learn from my mistakes, 1232 00:48:58,412 --> 00:49:00,416 and I need to be better. 1233 00:49:00,416 --> 00:49:02,630 So I hope you can forgive me. 1234 00:49:02,630 --> 00:49:08,432 ♪ 1235 00:49:12,566 --> 00:49:14,654 ‐ Thank you for saying that. 1236 00:49:14,654 --> 00:49:16,950 ♪ 1237 00:49:16,950 --> 00:49:19,664 And I know that you're not Michael. 1238 00:49:19,664 --> 00:49:24,172 ♪ 1239 00:49:24,172 --> 00:49:26,051 ‐ We're gonna find her. 1240 00:49:26,051 --> 00:49:28,055 ♪ 1241 00:49:28,055 --> 00:49:29,684 ‐ Okay. 1242 00:49:29,684 --> 00:49:31,813 ♪ 1243 00:49:31,813 --> 00:49:33,567 (sighs) 1244 00:49:33,567 --> 00:49:39,579 ♪ 1245 00:49:50,349 --> 00:49:52,353 SHAUNA: We needed a safe spot to lay low, 1246 00:49:52,353 --> 00:49:53,815 regroup, and strategize, 1247 00:49:53,815 --> 00:49:56,320 and even though it may not look like it, 1248 00:49:56,320 --> 00:50:00,495 trust me, this is the safest place in town right now. 1249 00:50:00,495 --> 00:50:03,501 ♪ 1250 00:50:03,501 --> 00:50:05,129 (keys jingling) 1251 00:50:05,129 --> 00:50:06,966 (door unlocking) 1252 00:50:06,966 --> 00:50:12,978 ♪ 1253 00:50:16,986 --> 00:50:17,988 (gun cocking) 1254 00:50:17,988 --> 00:50:19,617 (gasping) 1255 00:50:19,617 --> 00:50:20,827 Mom. 1256 00:50:20,827 --> 00:50:23,833 Could you get the gun out of our faces please? 1257 00:50:23,833 --> 00:50:25,086 Meet my mom. 1258 00:50:25,086 --> 00:50:26,506 She never taught me how to cross‐stitch, 1259 00:50:26,506 --> 00:50:29,512 but I can assemble a Beretta M9 in 10 seconds, 1260 00:50:29,512 --> 00:50:31,014 blindfolded. 1261 00:50:31,014 --> 00:50:34,145 AARON: Holy shit, that's your mom? 1262 00:50:34,145 --> 00:50:36,776 ‐ What did you bring into my house? 1263 00:50:36,776 --> 00:50:38,655 ♪ 1264 00:50:38,655 --> 00:50:40,909 ‐ They're, um, 1265 00:50:40,909 --> 00:50:43,623 friends of mine, I guess. 1266 00:50:43,623 --> 00:50:45,167 You can trust them. 1267 00:50:45,167 --> 00:50:47,548 We came here because... 1268 00:50:47,548 --> 00:50:49,467 we need your help. 1269 00:50:49,467 --> 00:50:51,723 You were right, Mama. 1270 00:50:51,723 --> 00:50:54,477 About all of it. 1271 00:50:54,477 --> 00:50:56,273 They're here. 1272 00:50:56,273 --> 00:51:02,285 ♪ 1273 00:51:04,540 --> 00:51:06,753 ‐ Well... 1274 00:51:06,753 --> 00:51:08,422 we're all fucked. 1275 00:51:08,422 --> 00:51:11,136 I mean, the fact that you even got this picture 1276 00:51:11,136 --> 00:51:12,388 means it's too late. 1277 00:51:12,388 --> 00:51:14,309 I've been calling this for years. 1278 00:51:14,309 --> 00:51:16,814 I told everyone about them, 1279 00:51:16,814 --> 00:51:18,818 little organisms on that meteor, 1280 00:51:18,818 --> 00:51:21,658 back on March 17th, 1978, 1281 00:51:21,658 --> 00:51:24,037 but they‐‐they all thought I was crazy. 1282 00:51:24,037 --> 00:51:25,206 ‐ We believe you. 1283 00:51:25,206 --> 00:51:27,920 That's why we're here, asking for your help. 1284 00:51:27,920 --> 00:51:29,924 MS. SHORE: You don't believe me! 1285 00:51:29,924 --> 00:51:31,385 You're just all in trouble. 1286 00:51:31,385 --> 00:51:32,763 You know, that's the problem. 1287 00:51:32,763 --> 00:51:35,184 Folks need everything to make sense 1288 00:51:35,184 --> 00:51:37,063 before they believe what's happening 1289 00:51:37,063 --> 00:51:38,190 right in front of them, 1290 00:51:38,190 --> 00:51:40,696 and by then, it's too late. 1291 00:51:40,696 --> 00:51:41,823 YUEJIN: Wow. 1292 00:51:41,823 --> 00:51:43,576 That is totally depressing 1293 00:51:43,576 --> 00:51:45,664 and unhelpful. 1294 00:51:45,664 --> 00:51:46,916 I'm ready to go. 1295 00:51:46,916 --> 00:51:48,085 ‐ Where are you off to? 1296 00:51:48,085 --> 00:51:51,091 ‐ I don't know, back to New York. 1297 00:51:51,091 --> 00:51:53,722 MISTY: Stop it, we need to try. 1298 00:51:53,722 --> 00:51:55,307 ♪ 1299 00:51:55,307 --> 00:51:57,604 Please, Ms. Shore, please. 1300 00:51:57,604 --> 00:52:00,317 Just‐‐God, just tell us what to do, okay? 1301 00:52:00,317 --> 00:52:02,363 My best friend is still out there. 1302 00:52:02,363 --> 00:52:03,742 (laughing) 1303 00:52:03,742 --> 00:52:05,119 Please. 1304 00:52:05,119 --> 00:52:11,131 ♪ 1305 00:52:12,216 --> 00:52:13,970 ‐ They were as small as bugs 1306 00:52:13,970 --> 00:52:16,099 when I first observed them, 1307 00:52:16,099 --> 00:52:18,187 and it appears that, well, 1308 00:52:18,187 --> 00:52:22,320 they're finally evolving into human size. 1309 00:52:22,320 --> 00:52:25,242 You know, them‐‐them shape‐shifting imposters, 1310 00:52:25,242 --> 00:52:27,623 they're just taking orders from the nest. 1311 00:52:27,623 --> 00:52:30,127 ‐ The nest? MS. SHORE: They're like ants. 1312 00:52:30,127 --> 00:52:33,258 Super alien ants. 1313 00:52:33,258 --> 00:52:36,014 Once you destroy the nest, 1314 00:52:36,014 --> 00:52:37,266 they'll all come down. 1315 00:52:37,266 --> 00:52:38,393 SHAUNA: Right. 1316 00:52:38,393 --> 00:52:40,397 They're just gonna keep taking over human beings 1317 00:52:40,397 --> 00:52:42,528 with their kind, so they multiply. 1318 00:52:42,528 --> 00:52:44,782 YUEJIN: You expect us to believe that? 1319 00:52:44,782 --> 00:52:46,661 That's insane. 1320 00:52:46,661 --> 00:52:48,665 The most logical explanation 1321 00:52:48,665 --> 00:52:52,756 is that this town is infected with something. 1322 00:52:52,756 --> 00:52:53,842 Not aliens. 1323 00:52:53,842 --> 00:52:55,720 MS. SHORE: I don't expect anything 1324 00:52:55,720 --> 00:52:57,265 from you, young lady. 1325 00:52:57,265 --> 00:53:00,271 And you seem the type that's too smart for her own good. 1326 00:53:00,271 --> 00:53:02,024 MISTY: Okay, look, let's just say 1327 00:53:02,024 --> 00:53:05,030 that there's a nest somewhere. 1328 00:53:05,030 --> 00:53:06,659 How do we destroy it? 1329 00:53:06,659 --> 00:53:09,163 (dubstep music) 1330 00:53:09,163 --> 00:53:15,175 ♪ 1331 00:53:18,390 --> 00:53:20,144 (lights powering on) 1332 00:53:23,066 --> 00:53:25,195 (soft electronic music) 1333 00:53:25,195 --> 00:53:27,408 ♪ 1334 00:53:27,408 --> 00:53:28,703 (whistling) 1335 00:53:28,703 --> 00:53:29,955 MS. STONE: There's some C4 1336 00:53:29,955 --> 00:53:31,834 in that backpack on the third shelf. 1337 00:53:31,834 --> 00:53:33,838 YUEJIN: C4? MS. SHORE: What? 1338 00:53:33,838 --> 00:53:35,800 How else are you gonna blow up the nest? 1339 00:53:35,800 --> 00:53:38,932 AARON: I don't think we know where the nest is. 1340 00:53:38,932 --> 00:53:40,184 Do we? 1341 00:53:40,184 --> 00:53:41,311 Oh! ‐ Sorry. 1342 00:53:41,311 --> 00:53:42,689 No, we haven't seen it yet. 1343 00:53:42,689 --> 00:53:45,027 ‐ Okay, well, when the meteor first hit, 1344 00:53:45,027 --> 00:53:46,196 it was in some field 1345 00:53:46,196 --> 00:53:48,075 next to that old, abandoned Miller warehouse. 1346 00:53:48,075 --> 00:53:49,327 AARON: The Miller warehouse? 1347 00:53:49,327 --> 00:53:51,331 That's the last stop for the pub crawl tonight. 1348 00:53:51,331 --> 00:53:52,793 They're probably already there. 1349 00:53:52,793 --> 00:53:54,212 ‐ That's why this is happening. 1350 00:53:54,212 --> 00:53:55,840 The aliens are defending themselves 1351 00:53:55,840 --> 00:53:57,343 against a bunch of drunk assholes 1352 00:53:57,343 --> 00:53:58,554 showing up at the nest, 1353 00:53:58,554 --> 00:54:00,558 and the nest must be inside that warehouse. 1354 00:54:00,558 --> 00:54:01,727 (Yuejin laughing) 1355 00:54:01,727 --> 00:54:04,065 MS. SHORE: Is something funny? 1356 00:54:04,065 --> 00:54:05,192 YUEJIN: Yeah! 1357 00:54:05,192 --> 00:54:07,071 This whole thing. 1358 00:54:07,071 --> 00:54:08,490 Everything we've seen tonight, 1359 00:54:08,490 --> 00:54:10,870 all these nonsense theories you guys are coming up with. 1360 00:54:10,870 --> 00:54:13,458 ‐ I know what I know, and I saw what I saw. 1361 00:54:13,458 --> 00:54:15,964 So if you're not interested in what I have to say, 1362 00:54:15,964 --> 00:54:17,718 then you can kindly fuck off 1363 00:54:17,718 --> 00:54:19,303 out of my house, young lady. 1364 00:54:19,303 --> 00:54:21,851 ‐ You know what, it's not a bad idea. 1365 00:54:21,851 --> 00:54:23,855 I should go. ‐ Where? 1366 00:54:23,855 --> 00:54:26,736 YUEJIN: Anywhere not here. 1367 00:54:26,736 --> 00:54:28,614 I don't know what's going on, 1368 00:54:28,614 --> 00:54:30,367 but we're just asking for trouble 1369 00:54:30,367 --> 00:54:31,620 if we go to that warehouse 1370 00:54:31,620 --> 00:54:32,956 and join back up with the pub crawl. 1371 00:54:32,956 --> 00:54:35,085 MISTY: Yuejin, we have to find Chloe, 1372 00:54:35,085 --> 00:54:37,131 and we need all the help that we can get, 1373 00:54:37,131 --> 00:54:39,970 so cut this shit out. 1374 00:54:39,970 --> 00:54:42,601 YUEJIN: You really don't get it, Misty. 1375 00:54:42,601 --> 00:54:44,395 Yeah, I'm not gonna stick around 1376 00:54:44,395 --> 00:54:46,901 for this hillbilly, E. T. bullshit. 1377 00:54:46,901 --> 00:54:49,907 Good luck with the nest. MISTY: Yuejin! 1378 00:54:49,907 --> 00:54:51,493 Yuejin! 1379 00:54:51,493 --> 00:54:53,790 (footsteps departing) 1380 00:54:53,790 --> 00:54:55,417 ♪ 1381 00:54:55,417 --> 00:54:57,923 ‐ All right, let's gear up. 1382 00:54:57,923 --> 00:54:59,843 ♪ 1383 00:54:59,843 --> 00:55:01,597 AARON: Hey. 1384 00:55:01,597 --> 00:55:03,768 You sure you're ready for this? 1385 00:55:03,768 --> 00:55:05,980 MISTY: I don't think we have a choice. 1386 00:55:05,980 --> 00:55:11,867 ♪ 1387 00:55:11,867 --> 00:55:14,790 YUEJIN: Fucking Podunk town. 1388 00:55:18,255 --> 00:55:20,927 (eerie music) 1389 00:55:20,927 --> 00:55:26,939 ♪ 1390 00:55:41,552 --> 00:55:42,929 Oh, shit. 1391 00:55:42,929 --> 00:55:44,265 ♪ 1392 00:55:44,265 --> 00:55:46,645 MS. SHORE: Where'd you get that? 1393 00:55:46,645 --> 00:55:48,148 SHAUNA: Dead alien. 1394 00:55:48,148 --> 00:55:49,818 (gun cocks) 1395 00:55:49,818 --> 00:55:51,404 AARON: Yuejin, what the fuck? 1396 00:55:51,404 --> 00:55:52,448 What happened? 1397 00:55:52,448 --> 00:55:53,951 YUEJIN: Hey, wait! 1398 00:55:53,951 --> 00:55:55,663 I changed my mind. 1399 00:55:55,663 --> 00:55:57,458 I'm coming with you guys. 1400 00:55:57,458 --> 00:55:58,460 ‐ What happened? 1401 00:55:58,460 --> 00:56:00,088 ‐ One of them chased me. 1402 00:56:00,088 --> 00:56:03,846 I got away, but, fuck, that was stupid. 1403 00:56:03,846 --> 00:56:05,349 You were right. 1404 00:56:05,349 --> 00:56:07,102 We should stick together. 1405 00:56:07,102 --> 00:56:08,564 ♪ 1406 00:56:08,564 --> 00:56:10,359 ‐ Welcome back. 1407 00:56:10,359 --> 00:56:11,862 All right. 1408 00:56:11,862 --> 00:56:14,492 You guys ready to party? 1409 00:56:14,492 --> 00:56:17,206 ‐ You don't have to tell me twice. 1410 00:56:17,206 --> 00:56:18,876 ‐ Let's do this. 1411 00:56:18,876 --> 00:56:22,466 ♪ 1412 00:56:22,466 --> 00:56:23,928 ‐ I'll be back, you know. 1413 00:56:23,928 --> 00:56:25,974 ‐ I know you will. 1414 00:56:25,974 --> 00:56:27,727 ‐ You gonna be okay here? 1415 00:56:27,727 --> 00:56:33,739 ♪ 1416 00:56:42,256 --> 00:56:43,634 ‐ What the... 1417 00:56:43,634 --> 00:56:49,646 ♪ 1418 00:56:51,775 --> 00:56:55,533 ‐ What'd you say happen to that guy who chased you again? 1419 00:56:55,533 --> 00:56:57,620 ‐ I guess he just took off. 1420 00:56:57,620 --> 00:57:01,377 ♪ 1421 00:57:01,377 --> 00:57:03,173 What? 1422 00:57:03,173 --> 00:57:04,509 ‐ We clear? AARON: Yeah. 1423 00:57:04,509 --> 00:57:06,638 SHAUNA: Then fuck it. Let's just go. 1424 00:57:06,638 --> 00:57:12,650 ♪ 1425 00:57:13,652 --> 00:57:14,905 (doors closing) 1426 00:57:14,905 --> 00:57:16,617 (engine starting) 1427 00:57:16,617 --> 00:57:19,163 Okay, so we find the nest, 1428 00:57:19,163 --> 00:57:21,292 blow it up, save Chloe... 1429 00:57:21,292 --> 00:57:23,672 and the world? 1430 00:57:23,672 --> 00:57:25,133 No big deal. 1431 00:57:29,183 --> 00:57:30,770 Okay, so at this point, 1432 00:57:30,770 --> 00:57:32,565 we are armed, slightly buzzed, 1433 00:57:32,565 --> 00:57:34,945 and ready to kick some alien ass. 1434 00:57:34,945 --> 00:57:36,573 Oh, in case you're wondering, 1435 00:57:36,573 --> 00:57:38,536 the nest is the physical nexus 1436 00:57:38,536 --> 00:57:40,540 of the metamorph psionic neural net. 1437 00:57:40,540 --> 00:57:43,587 Like, uh, alien Wi‐Fi. 1438 00:57:43,587 --> 00:57:45,800 The shared brain that controls them all. 1439 00:57:45,800 --> 00:57:47,554 At least that was the theory. 1440 00:57:47,554 --> 00:57:48,931 Nobody had ever seen it before, 1441 00:57:48,931 --> 00:57:50,267 but if it existed, 1442 00:57:50,267 --> 00:57:52,772 which we were, like, 98% sure that it did, 1443 00:57:52,772 --> 00:57:54,776 aliens would totally keep it hidden because it's, 1444 00:57:54,776 --> 00:57:57,574 like, a kill switch for their entire army. 1445 00:57:57,574 --> 00:57:58,659 Luckily, though, 1446 00:57:58,659 --> 00:58:00,036 neural energy has a limited range, 1447 00:58:00,036 --> 00:58:01,665 so we knew that it couldn't be far. 1448 00:58:01,665 --> 00:58:04,295 But, uh, as we were driving around town, 1449 00:58:04,295 --> 00:58:07,552 we started to realize that we might be running out of time. 1450 00:58:07,552 --> 00:58:09,973 Normally there'd be kids all over the place, 1451 00:58:09,973 --> 00:58:12,729 running around, drinking, making out, 1452 00:58:12,729 --> 00:58:15,233 puking, making out again with puke breath, 1453 00:58:15,233 --> 00:58:18,824 but it was just...empty. 1454 00:58:18,824 --> 00:58:20,828 Like a ghost town. 1455 00:58:20,828 --> 00:58:22,080 Best I figured, 1456 00:58:22,080 --> 00:58:24,628 most of them had already been replaced. 1457 00:58:24,628 --> 00:58:27,466 Ipso facto, dead. 1458 00:58:28,594 --> 00:58:34,606 ♪ 1459 00:58:59,488 --> 00:59:01,535 AARON: Shauna? 1460 00:59:01,535 --> 00:59:03,789 You okay? 1461 00:59:03,789 --> 00:59:05,668 SHAUNA: Yeah. 1462 00:59:05,668 --> 00:59:07,254 ‐ Are you sure? 1463 00:59:07,254 --> 00:59:10,135 ♪ 1464 00:59:10,135 --> 00:59:11,095 ‐ I don't know. 1465 00:59:11,095 --> 00:59:12,389 Part of me should be happy 1466 00:59:12,389 --> 00:59:14,393 because me and my mom were fucking right 1467 00:59:14,393 --> 00:59:15,646 the entire time, 1468 00:59:15,646 --> 00:59:17,525 but I'm also kind of freaking out 1469 00:59:17,525 --> 00:59:20,531 because us being right means that people are dying 1470 00:59:20,531 --> 00:59:22,910 and the world might end. 1471 00:59:23,787 --> 00:59:25,666 ‐ That's pretty dark. 1472 00:59:25,666 --> 00:59:26,918 SHAUNA: Yeah. 1473 00:59:30,425 --> 00:59:32,262 (Yuejin laughs) 1474 00:59:34,809 --> 00:59:36,187 ‐ What? 1475 00:59:36,187 --> 00:59:38,567 ‐ You really care about her, don't you? 1476 00:59:38,567 --> 00:59:41,072 ‐ Chloe? 1477 00:59:41,072 --> 00:59:42,575 She's my best friend. 1478 00:59:42,575 --> 00:59:44,411 YUEJIN: Best friend? 1479 00:59:44,411 --> 00:59:48,712 Hmm, so then what happened these last few weeks? 1480 00:59:48,712 --> 00:59:49,798 (sighs) 1481 00:59:49,798 --> 00:59:50,925 ‐ It was just... 1482 00:59:50,925 --> 00:59:54,557 the whole thing with me and Michael. 1483 00:59:54,557 --> 00:59:58,147 ♪ 1484 00:59:58,147 --> 01:00:00,193 I just remember telling Chloe about it 1485 01:00:00,193 --> 01:00:04,034 the next morning and... 1486 01:00:04,034 --> 01:00:07,040 and I couldn't tell if she believed me or not. 1487 01:00:07,040 --> 01:00:10,088 ♪ 1488 01:00:10,088 --> 01:00:11,842 But that's just Chloe. 1489 01:00:11,842 --> 01:00:13,094 ♪ 1490 01:00:13,094 --> 01:00:15,599 She never really takes anything seriously, 1491 01:00:15,599 --> 01:00:20,609 and life is just fun and carefree. 1492 01:00:20,609 --> 01:00:22,237 ♪ 1493 01:00:22,237 --> 01:00:23,741 ‐ Hmm. 1494 01:00:23,741 --> 01:00:26,078 Sounds like... 1495 01:00:26,078 --> 01:00:29,251 Chloe made the right choice. 1496 01:00:29,251 --> 01:00:31,757 MISTY: Excuse me? ‐ Well, I can't blame her. 1497 01:00:31,757 --> 01:00:32,967 You're a glutton for punishment 1498 01:00:32,967 --> 01:00:35,096 who surrounds herself with drama and psychosis, 1499 01:00:35,096 --> 01:00:37,977 like a conspiracy theorist and her mom, for example. 1500 01:00:37,977 --> 01:00:39,731 AARON: Yuejin, chill! SHAUNA: Hey, fuck you! 1501 01:00:39,731 --> 01:00:41,943 MISTY: You don't know anything about me and Chloe. 1502 01:00:41,943 --> 01:00:45,116 ‐ In fact, I don't know how Chloe ever put up 1503 01:00:45,116 --> 01:00:46,494 with your bullshit. 1504 01:00:46,494 --> 01:00:47,955 ‐ Stop the car. 1505 01:00:47,955 --> 01:00:49,124 ‐ What? 1506 01:00:49,124 --> 01:00:50,376 ♪ 1507 01:00:50,376 --> 01:00:51,963 ‐ Stop the car! 1508 01:00:51,963 --> 01:00:53,466 ♪ 1509 01:00:53,466 --> 01:00:55,136 (tires screeching) 1510 01:00:55,136 --> 01:00:59,646 ♪ 1511 01:00:59,646 --> 01:01:01,398 YUEJIN: What the fuck, Misty? MISTY: Get out! 1512 01:01:01,398 --> 01:01:02,777 AARON: Hey, what's going on? 1513 01:01:02,777 --> 01:01:05,114 ‐ This bitch is an alien. ‐ What are you talking about? 1514 01:01:05,114 --> 01:01:06,283 MISTY: She sees an alien, 1515 01:01:06,283 --> 01:01:07,537 lives to tell about it, 1516 01:01:07,537 --> 01:01:08,914 and then there's‐‐ there's no evidence 1517 01:01:08,914 --> 01:01:10,668 of this so‐called alien when we get outside 1518 01:01:10,668 --> 01:01:11,670 because she's one of them! 1519 01:01:11,670 --> 01:01:13,047 YUEJIN: She's just pissed off 1520 01:01:13,047 --> 01:01:15,343 because Chloe's replacing her with me as her number one. 1521 01:01:15,343 --> 01:01:16,387 ‐ Oh, fuck off! 1522 01:01:16,387 --> 01:01:17,974 AARON: Okay, this is crazy, you guys. 1523 01:01:17,974 --> 01:01:19,142 SHAUNA: Is it though? 1524 01:01:19,142 --> 01:01:20,478 She did disappear for a while 1525 01:01:20,478 --> 01:01:22,274 and came back with this brand new attitude, 1526 01:01:22,274 --> 01:01:23,861 and we've seen weirder shit tonight. 1527 01:01:23,861 --> 01:01:25,154 ‐ It's because I was trying to avoid 1528 01:01:25,154 --> 01:01:26,490 going on a suicide mission. 1529 01:01:26,490 --> 01:01:28,160 ‐ Oh, so then what happened? Why are you here now? 1530 01:01:28,160 --> 01:01:30,164 YUEJIN: And how do we know that you're not an alien? 1531 01:01:30,164 --> 01:01:31,292 You and your mom? 1532 01:01:31,292 --> 01:01:32,795 How do we know that you guys didn't just roofie 1533 01:01:32,795 --> 01:01:34,924 this whole town with your radiated weed? 1534 01:01:34,924 --> 01:01:37,012 ‐ What the fuck did you just say about me and my family? 1535 01:01:37,012 --> 01:01:38,389 AARON: All right, come on. MISTY: Guys. 1536 01:01:38,389 --> 01:01:40,184 There's an easy way to settle this. 1537 01:01:40,184 --> 01:01:41,521 (knife clicks) 1538 01:01:41,521 --> 01:01:43,399 ♪ 1539 01:01:43,399 --> 01:01:45,278 We're all gonna prick our fingers, 1540 01:01:45,278 --> 01:01:47,825 and everyone who bleeds red is human. 1541 01:01:47,825 --> 01:01:50,539 ♪ 1542 01:01:50,539 --> 01:01:52,083 ‐ I'll do it. 1543 01:01:52,083 --> 01:01:55,465 ♪ 1544 01:01:55,465 --> 01:01:57,052 (pricks) 1545 01:01:57,052 --> 01:01:58,179 MISTY: All right. 1546 01:01:58,179 --> 01:01:59,431 I appreciate the support, Aaron, 1547 01:01:59,431 --> 01:02:00,684 but we all know that you're human 1548 01:02:00,684 --> 01:02:03,064 because of the gaping flesh wound on your leg. 1549 01:02:03,064 --> 01:02:05,401 AARON: Oh, yeah, right, right, okay. 1550 01:02:05,401 --> 01:02:07,823 MISTY: So, who's next? 1551 01:02:07,823 --> 01:02:09,409 ‐ Since you're the one accusing people, 1552 01:02:09,409 --> 01:02:11,581 why don't you go? MISTY: Fine by me. 1553 01:02:11,581 --> 01:02:14,837 ♪ 1554 01:02:14,837 --> 01:02:16,298 (groans) 1555 01:02:16,298 --> 01:02:22,310 ♪ 1556 01:02:23,814 --> 01:02:24,983 YUEJIN: See, she took us 1557 01:02:24,983 --> 01:02:26,820 to that creepy old hoarder's house, 1558 01:02:26,820 --> 01:02:29,241 a woman who, by the way, conveniently told us 1559 01:02:29,241 --> 01:02:31,120 to blow up a warehouse party 1560 01:02:31,120 --> 01:02:33,082 based on some bullshit story 1561 01:02:33,082 --> 01:02:34,376 about the nest or whatever? 1562 01:02:34,376 --> 01:02:36,005 ‐ Well, maybe you don't want us going to the nest 1563 01:02:36,005 --> 01:02:37,591 because you're a shit‐sucking alien fuck! 1564 01:02:37,591 --> 01:02:38,927 YUEJIN: And maybe you're as crazy 1565 01:02:38,927 --> 01:02:40,597 as your fucking mama is. SHAUNA: Fuck you! 1566 01:02:40,597 --> 01:02:42,058 MISTY: Okay, Shauna, just show her 1567 01:02:42,058 --> 01:02:43,227 that you have human blood. 1568 01:02:43,227 --> 01:02:44,689 ‐ Give me the fucking knife. 1569 01:02:44,689 --> 01:02:50,617 ♪ 1570 01:02:50,617 --> 01:02:53,497 I'll show you the truth. 1571 01:02:53,497 --> 01:02:55,627 AARON: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey, hey! 1572 01:02:55,627 --> 01:02:58,842 MISTY: Oh my God! SHAUNA: Fuck! 1573 01:02:58,842 --> 01:03:00,512 ‐ Oh, look at that. 1574 01:03:00,512 --> 01:03:02,223 Not an alien. 1575 01:03:02,223 --> 01:03:03,894 ♪ 1576 01:03:03,894 --> 01:03:05,396 (knife clanks) 1577 01:03:05,396 --> 01:03:07,358 SHAUNA: Don't let her get the bag! 1578 01:03:07,358 --> 01:03:11,408 ♪ 1579 01:03:11,408 --> 01:03:12,912 (groaning) 1580 01:03:12,912 --> 01:03:14,498 (stabs) 1581 01:03:14,498 --> 01:03:16,920 ♪ 1582 01:03:16,920 --> 01:03:19,174 (dripping) 1583 01:03:19,174 --> 01:03:24,852 ♪ 1584 01:03:24,852 --> 01:03:27,232 MISTY: Oh, man. 1585 01:03:27,232 --> 01:03:28,234 Fuck. 1586 01:03:28,234 --> 01:03:30,906 Fuck, let's go, let's go. 1587 01:03:30,906 --> 01:03:32,743 Come on. 1588 01:03:32,743 --> 01:03:34,412 SHAUNA: Okay. 1589 01:03:34,412 --> 01:03:40,424 ♪ 1590 01:03:47,313 --> 01:03:49,694 AARON: And then there were three. 1591 01:03:49,694 --> 01:03:55,706 ♪ 1592 01:03:58,335 --> 01:04:00,423 (dance music playing) 1593 01:04:00,423 --> 01:04:06,393 ♪ 1594 01:04:07,938 --> 01:04:09,817 MISTY: This is the place? 1595 01:04:09,817 --> 01:04:13,032 SHAUNA: Yup, this is where it all started. 1596 01:04:13,032 --> 01:04:14,911 AARON: Do you think we're too late? 1597 01:04:14,911 --> 01:04:16,956 MISTY: Only one way to find out. 1598 01:04:16,956 --> 01:04:18,334 (slams) 1599 01:04:18,334 --> 01:04:19,461 Oh my God. 1600 01:04:19,461 --> 01:04:20,714 (laughter) 1601 01:04:20,714 --> 01:04:21,966 Shit. 1602 01:04:21,966 --> 01:04:23,219 (laughter) 1603 01:04:23,219 --> 01:04:24,471 What do you think, aliens? 1604 01:04:24,471 --> 01:04:25,724 ‐ I think they're just drunk. 1605 01:04:25,724 --> 01:04:27,101 MISTY: Well, should we warn them? 1606 01:04:27,101 --> 01:04:28,980 AARON: Yeah. 1607 01:04:28,980 --> 01:04:31,819 Hey! Don't go in there! 1608 01:04:31,819 --> 01:04:33,364 GROUP: Fuck you! 1609 01:04:33,364 --> 01:04:35,243 AARON: Well, they're dead. 1610 01:04:35,243 --> 01:04:37,455 ♪ 1611 01:04:37,455 --> 01:04:39,376 (doors opening) 1612 01:04:39,376 --> 01:04:45,346 ♪ 1613 01:04:47,225 --> 01:04:48,853 (sighing) 1614 01:04:48,853 --> 01:04:50,732 ♪ 1615 01:04:50,732 --> 01:04:52,987 So, do we think Chloe's here? 1616 01:04:52,987 --> 01:04:54,949 SHAUNA: It's the end of the crawl. 1617 01:04:54,949 --> 01:04:56,577 She has to be. 1618 01:04:56,577 --> 01:05:02,589 ♪ 1619 01:05:06,388 --> 01:05:07,891 All right, once we find the nest, 1620 01:05:07,891 --> 01:05:09,520 I'll plant the charges and set the timer 1621 01:05:09,520 --> 01:05:10,522 for five minutes. 1622 01:05:10,522 --> 01:05:12,108 Aaron, you pull the fire alarm. 1623 01:05:12,108 --> 01:05:13,360 Everybody will evacuate, 1624 01:05:13,360 --> 01:05:15,406 and we'll bounce before we're blown to bits. 1625 01:05:15,406 --> 01:05:17,368 AARON: So, what are the rules of engagement 1626 01:05:17,368 --> 01:05:19,247 for humans and/or aliens? 1627 01:05:19,247 --> 01:05:21,669 ‐ Rules of engagement? ‐ Chill out, Ramboner. 1628 01:05:21,669 --> 01:05:24,299 Just assume everyone's an alien, all right? 1629 01:05:24,299 --> 01:05:25,510 Punch or stun them with weapons 1630 01:05:25,510 --> 01:05:27,263 if they get too close or aggressive. 1631 01:05:27,263 --> 01:05:29,769 ‐ What if it's Chloe? 1632 01:05:29,769 --> 01:05:31,355 ‐ No exceptions. 1633 01:05:31,355 --> 01:05:35,530 ♪ 1634 01:05:35,530 --> 01:05:36,741 All right, y'all. 1635 01:05:36,741 --> 01:05:38,620 Last chance to pull the ripcord and bail. 1636 01:05:38,620 --> 01:05:39,914 ‐ No way, José. 1637 01:05:39,914 --> 01:05:42,043 We're in this together now. 1638 01:05:42,043 --> 01:05:43,755 (sighs) 1639 01:05:43,755 --> 01:05:44,924 ♪ 1640 01:05:44,924 --> 01:05:46,928 ‐ Yeah, let's do this. 1641 01:05:46,928 --> 01:05:49,182 ♪ 1642 01:05:49,182 --> 01:05:50,936 (door opening) 1643 01:05:50,936 --> 01:05:56,948 ♪ 1644 01:06:00,705 --> 01:06:03,335 AARON: Um, where is everyone? 1645 01:06:03,335 --> 01:06:05,423 MISTY: Did they just go home? 1646 01:06:05,423 --> 01:06:06,466 SHAUNA: Fuck. 1647 01:06:06,466 --> 01:06:08,262 Maybe everyone's already an alien, 1648 01:06:08,262 --> 01:06:09,765 and these people are too wasted 1649 01:06:09,765 --> 01:06:11,059 to realize that they're next. 1650 01:06:11,059 --> 01:06:14,441 AARON: This is the lamest pub crawl ever. 1651 01:06:14,441 --> 01:06:16,779 MISTY: Do you guys see Chloe? 1652 01:06:16,779 --> 01:06:18,323 SHAUNA: Hey, hey, where are you going? 1653 01:06:18,323 --> 01:06:19,660 MISTY: I'm just looking, I just wanna‐‐ 1654 01:06:19,660 --> 01:06:21,079 ‐ No, come on, we gotta stay focused 1655 01:06:21,079 --> 01:06:22,290 and stay together. 1656 01:06:22,290 --> 01:06:23,960 Let's keep going. 1657 01:06:23,960 --> 01:06:27,968 ♪ 1658 01:06:27,968 --> 01:06:29,805 MICHAEL: What's up, bro? 1659 01:06:29,805 --> 01:06:32,603 AARON: What the fuck, Michael? 1660 01:06:32,603 --> 01:06:34,230 ‐ What the fuck is this? 1661 01:06:34,230 --> 01:06:36,109 (grunting, punching) 1662 01:06:36,109 --> 01:06:38,113 (breathing heavily) 1663 01:06:38,113 --> 01:06:39,700 ♪ 1664 01:06:39,700 --> 01:06:41,077 MISTY: What? 1665 01:06:41,077 --> 01:06:43,499 I thought you said no exceptions. 1666 01:06:43,499 --> 01:06:49,469 ♪ 1667 01:06:52,851 --> 01:06:54,103 ‐ It's red. 1668 01:06:54,103 --> 01:06:55,356 He's not an alien. 1669 01:06:55,356 --> 01:06:56,734 ‐ Either way... 1670 01:06:56,734 --> 01:06:58,487 Come on. 1671 01:06:58,487 --> 01:06:59,949 (sighs) 1672 01:06:59,949 --> 01:07:05,334 ♪ 1673 01:07:05,334 --> 01:07:07,255 SHAUNA: Okay, well, 1674 01:07:07,255 --> 01:07:09,510 I mean, it wouldn't just be out here in the open 1675 01:07:09,510 --> 01:07:12,098 for everyone to see it, so... 1676 01:07:12,098 --> 01:07:18,026 ♪ 1677 01:07:18,026 --> 01:07:20,532 (dripping) 1678 01:07:20,532 --> 01:07:22,285 Weird alien goo dripping 1679 01:07:22,285 --> 01:07:25,291 from an unknown source above us. 1680 01:07:25,291 --> 01:07:27,503 ‐ It's probably up there. 1681 01:07:27,503 --> 01:07:29,382 ♪ 1682 01:07:29,382 --> 01:07:30,844 ‐ All right. 1683 01:07:30,844 --> 01:07:32,764 Let's check it out. 1684 01:07:32,764 --> 01:07:38,776 ♪ 1685 01:07:53,640 --> 01:07:55,518 (chain rattling) 1686 01:07:55,518 --> 01:08:00,319 ♪ 1687 01:08:00,319 --> 01:08:02,073 Jesus Christ. 1688 01:08:02,073 --> 01:08:03,910 ‐ Oh my God. ‐ Wow. 1689 01:08:03,910 --> 01:08:09,922 ♪ 1690 01:08:11,592 --> 01:08:14,890 ‐ How did your mom predict all this? 1691 01:08:14,890 --> 01:08:17,646 ‐ She first discovered them when the meteor hit, 1692 01:08:17,646 --> 01:08:20,819 and then she spent her entire life researching. 1693 01:08:20,819 --> 01:08:22,864 Nobody believed her. 1694 01:08:22,864 --> 01:08:25,244 Everybody just thought she was, like, wasted 1695 01:08:25,244 --> 01:08:27,331 'cause it happened on St. Patrick's Day. 1696 01:08:27,331 --> 01:08:28,584 AARON: Once we destroy this thing, 1697 01:08:28,584 --> 01:08:30,337 all the aliens will die, right? 1698 01:08:30,337 --> 01:08:33,009 SHAUNA: Well, that's the theory. 1699 01:08:33,009 --> 01:08:34,470 ♪ 1700 01:08:34,470 --> 01:08:36,141 ‐ Well, let's blow this shit up 1701 01:08:36,141 --> 01:08:37,894 and get the hell outta here. 1702 01:08:37,894 --> 01:08:40,525 ♪ 1703 01:08:40,525 --> 01:08:43,113 Whoa. You sure you know what you're doing? 1704 01:08:43,113 --> 01:08:45,409 ‐ Yeah, yeah. Me and Mom used to blow up cars 1705 01:08:45,409 --> 01:08:46,912 at the junkyard all the time. 1706 01:08:46,912 --> 01:08:48,415 I was like six, 1707 01:08:48,415 --> 01:08:50,127 but I still remember the process. 1708 01:08:50,127 --> 01:08:51,881 AARON: That's really reassuring. 1709 01:08:51,881 --> 01:08:55,137 ♪ 1710 01:08:55,137 --> 01:08:56,473 (gasps) 1711 01:08:56,473 --> 01:08:58,351 ♪ 1712 01:08:58,351 --> 01:09:00,899 ‐ She's here! AARON: Who? 1713 01:09:00,899 --> 01:09:02,401 ‐ Chloe, Chloe, she's down below. 1714 01:09:02,401 --> 01:09:04,740 ‐ No, no, no, no, no, do not go down there, 1715 01:09:04,740 --> 01:09:06,619 no exceptions! 1716 01:09:06,619 --> 01:09:08,288 ‐ Chloe, Chloe! 1717 01:09:08,288 --> 01:09:11,419 ♪ 1718 01:09:11,419 --> 01:09:14,760 Chloe? CHLOE: Misty! 1719 01:09:14,760 --> 01:09:15,929 Dude! 1720 01:09:15,929 --> 01:09:17,139 (squealing) 1721 01:09:17,139 --> 01:09:19,060 Holy shit! 1722 01:09:19,060 --> 01:09:22,024 MISTY: Chloe, I'm sorry for walking away from you 1723 01:09:22,024 --> 01:09:23,820 at the pub and leaving you alone... 1724 01:09:23,820 --> 01:09:25,907 ‐ You won't believe the shit that's happened to me tonight. 1725 01:09:25,907 --> 01:09:28,078 First of all, Aaron attacked me. 1726 01:09:28,078 --> 01:09:29,665 Did you‐‐did you not hear me? 1727 01:09:29,665 --> 01:09:31,836 Aaron attacked me, he's a psycho. 1728 01:09:31,836 --> 01:09:33,673 ‐ Girl, it is a long story, 1729 01:09:33,673 --> 01:09:36,637 but just believe me, that was not Aaron. 1730 01:09:36,637 --> 01:09:38,306 ♪ 1731 01:09:38,306 --> 01:09:39,810 (beeping) 1732 01:09:39,810 --> 01:09:43,943 AARON: Ugh, you are nasty. 1733 01:09:43,943 --> 01:09:46,322 What are you made out of? 1734 01:09:46,322 --> 01:09:48,034 SHAUNA: All right, timer's set. 1735 01:09:48,034 --> 01:09:49,705 We have five minutes to get back to the car. 1736 01:09:49,705 --> 01:09:51,165 Whoa, whoa, wait, what are you doing? 1737 01:09:51,165 --> 01:09:52,209 Don't fucking touch it! 1738 01:09:52,209 --> 01:09:54,297 You just tripped some alien alarm. 1739 01:09:54,297 --> 01:09:56,050 (timer beeping) 1740 01:09:56,050 --> 01:09:57,344 Oh my God. 1741 01:09:57,344 --> 01:09:58,598 Fuck, you are such an idiot. 1742 01:09:58,598 --> 01:10:00,602 We really have to go now, come on. 1743 01:10:00,602 --> 01:10:02,438 (timer beeping) 1744 01:10:02,438 --> 01:10:05,612 ♪ 1745 01:10:05,612 --> 01:10:07,489 ‐ No, no, no, it was for sure Aaron, 1746 01:10:07,489 --> 01:10:09,493 and he for sure attacked me. 1747 01:10:09,493 --> 01:10:11,205 ♪ 1748 01:10:11,205 --> 01:10:12,333 ‐ What was that? 1749 01:10:12,333 --> 01:10:15,213 CHLOE: What the fuck kind of noise? 1750 01:10:15,213 --> 01:10:17,176 (growling) 1751 01:10:17,176 --> 01:10:19,472 What is happening‐‐ ‐ Hey, hey, hey. 1752 01:10:19,472 --> 01:10:21,727 Hi, uh, timer's set, we gotta go right now. 1753 01:10:21,727 --> 01:10:23,104 CHLOE: Oh, no, no, no, no! 1754 01:10:23,104 --> 01:10:24,858 AARON: Hey, you found Chloe. 1755 01:10:24,858 --> 01:10:26,695 CHLOE: Get the fuck away from me. 1756 01:10:26,695 --> 01:10:27,739 MISTY: Chloe... AARON: What? 1757 01:10:27,739 --> 01:10:28,741 ‐ Okay, Chloe, 1758 01:10:28,741 --> 01:10:31,245 Aaron didn't attack you. ‐ What? 1759 01:10:31,245 --> 01:10:32,832 Misty, I know what happened. 1760 01:10:32,832 --> 01:10:34,210 This is not your made‐up bullshit. 1761 01:10:34,210 --> 01:10:36,381 AARON: Wait, wait, how do you know she's not an alien? 1762 01:10:36,381 --> 01:10:37,383 ‐ I'm sorry, what? 1763 01:10:37,383 --> 01:10:38,594 AARON: Here, here, check her blood. 1764 01:10:38,594 --> 01:10:40,097 CHLOE: What did he say? 1765 01:10:40,097 --> 01:10:41,391 (Chloe whimpering) 1766 01:10:41,391 --> 01:10:43,144 MISTY: It's okay, it's me, it's me, okay? 1767 01:10:43,144 --> 01:10:45,023 I know this doesn't make sense at all right now, 1768 01:10:45,023 --> 01:10:46,652 but this is something that we have to do 1769 01:10:46,652 --> 01:10:48,531 to make sure, just trust me. 1770 01:10:48,531 --> 01:10:50,492 ‐ I'm not gonna let you cut me! 1771 01:10:50,492 --> 01:10:51,912 You're fucking crazy! 1772 01:10:51,912 --> 01:10:53,289 I knew you were fucking mental! 1773 01:10:53,289 --> 01:10:54,876 SHAUNA: Hey, hey, hey, last chance. 1774 01:10:54,876 --> 01:10:56,505 If I get to the car and you guys aren't there, 1775 01:10:56,505 --> 01:10:57,924 I swear to fuck I am taking off. 1776 01:10:57,924 --> 01:10:59,385 The bomb's gonna go off any minute now. 1777 01:10:59,385 --> 01:11:01,389 ‐ Now there's a bomb? SHAUNA: Yes, a bomb! 1778 01:11:01,389 --> 01:11:03,476 And Aaron just let every alien in town 1779 01:11:03,476 --> 01:11:04,521 know that we're here. 1780 01:11:04,521 --> 01:11:06,107 We gotta go now. Get to the fire alarm. 1781 01:11:06,107 --> 01:11:07,902 We need to get everyone out of here. 1782 01:11:07,902 --> 01:11:09,656 ‐ Chloe, are you kidding? 1783 01:11:09,656 --> 01:11:12,036 CHLOE: Get away from me, psycho! 1784 01:11:12,036 --> 01:11:13,246 (knife clanks) 1785 01:11:13,246 --> 01:11:15,752 (growling) 1786 01:11:15,752 --> 01:11:17,672 ‐ Oh, shit! 1787 01:11:17,672 --> 01:11:20,553 (screaming) 1788 01:11:20,553 --> 01:11:22,932 (shouting) 1789 01:11:22,932 --> 01:11:25,062 (intense music) 1790 01:11:25,062 --> 01:11:26,690 ♪ 1791 01:11:26,690 --> 01:11:27,942 (screaming) 1792 01:11:27,942 --> 01:11:30,072 (growling) 1793 01:11:30,072 --> 01:11:31,449 ♪ 1794 01:11:31,449 --> 01:11:33,328 (screaming) 1795 01:11:33,328 --> 01:11:35,958 (fire alarm ringing) 1796 01:11:35,958 --> 01:11:38,088 (screaming) 1797 01:11:38,088 --> 01:11:39,966 ♪ 1798 01:11:39,966 --> 01:11:42,262 (shouts for help) 1799 01:11:42,262 --> 01:11:44,433 (screaming) 1800 01:11:44,433 --> 01:11:45,937 (panting) 1801 01:11:45,937 --> 01:11:48,066 (shouting) 1802 01:11:48,066 --> 01:11:50,070 AARON: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! 1803 01:11:50,070 --> 01:11:52,449 ‐ Fuck, Aaron! What are you doing? 1804 01:11:52,449 --> 01:11:54,036 ‐ Um, I'm saving you. 1805 01:11:54,036 --> 01:11:55,790 ‐ Which way is the exit? 1806 01:11:55,790 --> 01:11:57,669 ‐ It's that way, come on. 1807 01:11:57,669 --> 01:11:59,798 ♪ 1808 01:11:59,798 --> 01:12:01,300 (beeping) 1809 01:12:01,300 --> 01:12:03,346 (fire alarm ringing) 1810 01:12:03,346 --> 01:12:05,810 ♪ 1811 01:12:05,810 --> 01:12:07,730 (groaning, growling) 1812 01:12:07,730 --> 01:12:09,316 ‐ Chloe! 1813 01:12:09,316 --> 01:12:14,118 ♪ 1814 01:12:14,118 --> 01:12:16,455 Let her go. 1815 01:12:16,455 --> 01:12:18,501 CHLOE: Get the fuck off me. 1816 01:12:18,501 --> 01:12:21,215 (alien sounds) 1817 01:12:21,215 --> 01:12:24,096 ‐ Oh, I'm gonna kill the fuck outta you. 1818 01:12:24,096 --> 01:12:25,223 ♪ 1819 01:12:25,223 --> 01:12:27,729 CHLOE: Fuck, Michael, get off of me! 1820 01:12:27,729 --> 01:12:30,735 Let me go, you psycho fucker! 1821 01:12:30,735 --> 01:12:32,112 (door closes) 1822 01:12:32,112 --> 01:12:34,074 ♪ 1823 01:12:34,074 --> 01:12:36,495 [muffled] Get the fuck off me! 1824 01:12:36,495 --> 01:12:37,456 (screams) 1825 01:12:37,456 --> 01:12:39,460 Fuck, did you just bite me? 1826 01:12:39,460 --> 01:12:41,339 ♪ 1827 01:12:41,339 --> 01:12:42,884 Fucking psycho. 1828 01:12:42,884 --> 01:12:45,472 ♪ 1829 01:12:45,472 --> 01:12:47,644 (shivering) 1830 01:12:47,644 --> 01:12:49,021 ‐ Misty? 1831 01:12:49,021 --> 01:12:50,775 ‐ Holy fuck! 1832 01:12:50,775 --> 01:12:52,528 ‐ Oh, fuck. 1833 01:12:54,281 --> 01:12:55,408 ‐ Shoot that thing! 1834 01:12:55,408 --> 01:12:56,870 Shoot it, it bit me, it bit me! 1835 01:12:56,870 --> 01:12:58,999 ‐ I don't even know what the fuck is happening, 1836 01:12:58,999 --> 01:13:00,377 and no, I did not! 1837 01:13:00,377 --> 01:13:02,799 SHAUNA: Don't move, I will kill you both if I have to. 1838 01:13:02,799 --> 01:13:05,011 AARON: Um, guys, the clock is kinda ticking here. 1839 01:13:05,011 --> 01:13:06,515 SHAUNA: Well, dude, you better hurry up. 1840 01:13:06,515 --> 01:13:08,142 Which one is it? 1841 01:13:08,142 --> 01:13:10,606 CHLOE A: Misty, it's me. ‐ Misty... 1842 01:13:10,606 --> 01:13:12,527 CHLOE A: You gotta believe me. 1843 01:13:12,527 --> 01:13:15,156 ‐ Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! 1844 01:13:15,156 --> 01:13:16,367 Fuck. 1845 01:13:16,367 --> 01:13:18,371 (panting) 1846 01:13:18,371 --> 01:13:20,292 ♪ 1847 01:13:20,292 --> 01:13:23,674 (Chloe sobbing) 1848 01:13:23,674 --> 01:13:25,678 ‐ Hey, Chloe? 1849 01:13:25,678 --> 01:13:26,930 (whimpering) 1850 01:13:26,930 --> 01:13:28,684 Do you trust me? 1851 01:13:28,684 --> 01:13:29,936 ‐ What? 1852 01:13:29,936 --> 01:13:32,692 ‐ To do this, to choose the right one. 1853 01:13:32,692 --> 01:13:34,696 Do you trust me? 1854 01:13:34,696 --> 01:13:36,324 ‐ Of course I trust you. 1855 01:13:36,324 --> 01:13:38,077 You're my best friend. 1856 01:13:38,077 --> 01:13:40,833 ♪ 1857 01:13:40,833 --> 01:13:42,837 MISTY: And what about you? 1858 01:13:42,837 --> 01:13:44,716 ♪ 1859 01:13:44,716 --> 01:13:47,054 Am I your best friend? 1860 01:13:47,054 --> 01:13:48,181 ‐ I don't fucking know! 1861 01:13:48,181 --> 01:13:49,308 I just don't want to die. 1862 01:13:49,308 --> 01:13:50,393 Please don't kill me. 1863 01:13:50,393 --> 01:13:52,022 Please don't kill me! 1864 01:13:52,022 --> 01:13:53,399 (grunts) 1865 01:13:53,399 --> 01:13:54,694 (growling) 1866 01:13:54,694 --> 01:13:56,072 (thud) 1867 01:13:56,072 --> 01:13:59,078 (panting) 1868 01:13:59,078 --> 01:14:03,044 (Chloe gasping) 1869 01:14:03,044 --> 01:14:04,672 ‐ Let's go. 1870 01:14:06,551 --> 01:14:07,845 ‐ Okay. 1871 01:14:07,845 --> 01:14:09,473 (footsteps running) 1872 01:14:09,473 --> 01:14:11,477 (electronic music) 1873 01:14:11,477 --> 01:14:17,489 ♪ 1874 01:14:20,370 --> 01:14:22,959 (engine starting) 1875 01:14:22,959 --> 01:14:24,253 ♪ 1876 01:14:24,253 --> 01:14:26,006 (tires screeching) 1877 01:14:26,006 --> 01:14:27,008 ♪ 1878 01:14:27,008 --> 01:14:28,929 (Misty exhales) 1879 01:14:28,929 --> 01:14:30,599 (beeping) 1880 01:14:30,599 --> 01:14:34,189 CHLOE: Misty, how did you know it was me? 1881 01:14:34,189 --> 01:14:35,442 ♪ 1882 01:14:35,442 --> 01:14:36,862 (beeping) 1883 01:14:36,862 --> 01:14:39,366 ‐ I knew my Chloe wouldn't lie to me. 1884 01:14:39,366 --> 01:14:42,122 You only care about yourself, so... 1885 01:14:42,122 --> 01:14:45,754 I knew that you wouldn't just... 1886 01:14:45,754 --> 01:14:47,967 tell me what I wanted to hear. 1887 01:14:47,967 --> 01:14:50,263 ♪ 1888 01:14:50,263 --> 01:14:51,516 (explosion) 1889 01:14:51,516 --> 01:14:53,144 SHAUNA: Oh, shit! 1890 01:14:53,144 --> 01:14:55,148 (cheering) 1891 01:14:55,148 --> 01:14:56,651 Goodbye, aliens! 1892 01:14:56,651 --> 01:14:58,029 Peace out, bitches! 1893 01:14:58,029 --> 01:14:59,281 ‐ Woo! ‐ Woo! 1894 01:14:59,281 --> 01:15:00,743 (Shauna and Aaron laughing) 1895 01:15:00,743 --> 01:15:01,995 (explosions) 1896 01:15:01,995 --> 01:15:02,997 AARON: Yes! 1897 01:15:02,997 --> 01:15:04,542 (laughing) 1898 01:15:04,542 --> 01:15:06,420 ‐ So they're all dead now, right? 1899 01:15:06,420 --> 01:15:07,548 ‐ Yup. ‐ Okay. 1900 01:15:07,548 --> 01:15:09,051 Can I at least take you to dinner? 1901 01:15:09,051 --> 01:15:10,011 SHAUNA: Nope. 1902 01:15:10,011 --> 01:15:11,765 AARON: Okay, how about coffee? 1903 01:15:11,765 --> 01:15:13,267 SHAUNA: Maybe. 1904 01:15:13,267 --> 01:15:14,729 (upbeat music) 1905 01:15:14,729 --> 01:15:16,900 So, as you can probably guess, 1906 01:15:16,900 --> 01:15:18,361 Misty unfollowed Chloe 1907 01:15:18,361 --> 01:15:20,281 and hasn't looked back. 1908 01:15:20,281 --> 01:15:22,620 And as hard as it is to believe, 1909 01:15:22,620 --> 01:15:25,250 her and I have actually gotten kinda close. 1910 01:15:25,250 --> 01:15:28,005 I mean, she's still a princess, but... 1911 01:15:28,005 --> 01:15:29,926 she's actually kinda cool. 1912 01:15:29,926 --> 01:15:32,180 And Aaron? 1913 01:15:32,180 --> 01:15:35,061 Well, he's still a doofus, 1914 01:15:35,061 --> 01:15:38,317 but we've been kind of hanging out a lot lately, 1915 01:15:38,317 --> 01:15:40,321 and...I don't know. 1916 01:15:40,321 --> 01:15:43,662 Definitely not putting labels on it or anything. 1917 01:15:43,662 --> 01:15:46,083 So, anyways, 1918 01:15:46,083 --> 01:15:48,337 that is the story of how me and my friends 1919 01:15:48,337 --> 01:15:51,218 managed to stop an alien invasion. 1920 01:15:51,218 --> 01:15:52,513 Wild, right? 1921 01:15:52,513 --> 01:15:55,435 I mean, me, friends. 1922 01:15:55,435 --> 01:15:57,565 Of course, the feds showed up after 1923 01:15:57,565 --> 01:15:59,318 with, like, tons of questions 1924 01:15:59,318 --> 01:16:00,946 and not so subtly implied 1925 01:16:00,946 --> 01:16:02,825 that this was all highly top secret, 1926 01:16:02,825 --> 01:16:07,083 and "snitches get stitches" and all that, but... 1927 01:16:07,083 --> 01:16:09,421 well, fuck it. 1928 01:16:09,421 --> 01:16:10,841 There might be more nests out there, 1929 01:16:10,841 --> 01:16:12,678 and it's not like those G‐men did much 1930 01:16:12,678 --> 01:16:14,097 to stop the last one. 1931 01:16:14,097 --> 01:16:15,559 Alan Moore once said that, 1932 01:16:15,559 --> 01:16:18,314 "The truth of the world is that it's chaotic. 1933 01:16:18,314 --> 01:16:22,865 The truth is not some finely tuned conspiracy theory. 1934 01:16:22,865 --> 01:16:26,581 The truth is something far more frightening. 1935 01:16:26,581 --> 01:16:28,250 Nobody is in control. 1936 01:16:28,250 --> 01:16:31,006 The world is rudderless." 1937 01:16:31,006 --> 01:16:32,968 Well, bitches, 1938 01:16:32,968 --> 01:16:36,350 these broadcasts are your instructions. 1939 01:16:36,350 --> 01:16:38,479 Seek and destroy. 1940 01:16:38,479 --> 01:16:40,233 Consider me your rudder. 1941 01:16:40,233 --> 01:16:42,487 (rumbling) 1942 01:16:42,487 --> 01:16:46,120 (tense music) 1943 01:16:46,120 --> 01:16:48,709 Well, shit. 1944 01:16:48,709 --> 01:16:50,754 Mom, they're back! 1945 01:16:50,754 --> 01:16:52,508 Get your shotgun! 1946 01:16:52,508 --> 01:16:57,601 ♪ 1947 01:16:57,601 --> 01:16:59,647 INDIANA: ♪ Bad luck ♪ 1948 01:16:59,647 --> 01:17:02,277 ("Bad Luck" by Indiana plays) 1949 01:17:02,277 --> 01:17:04,489 ♪ Bad luck ♪ 1950 01:17:04,489 --> 01:17:07,747 ♪ 1951 01:17:07,747 --> 01:17:09,291 ♪ I'll be bad luck for ya ♪ 1952 01:17:09,291 --> 01:17:10,878 ‐ You just have to believe me, 1953 01:17:10,878 --> 01:17:13,800 that was not Aaron. 1954 01:17:13,800 --> 01:17:15,136 DIRECTOR: Cut. 1955 01:17:15,136 --> 01:17:17,098 CHLOE: Pretty sure it was Aaron. 1956 01:17:17,098 --> 01:17:19,645 ‐ Maybe it was. CHLOE: It looked like Aaron. 1957 01:17:19,645 --> 01:17:21,900 INDIANA: ♪ I'll be bad luck ♪ 1958 01:17:21,900 --> 01:17:24,906 ♪ I'm not superstitious but ♪ 1959 01:17:24,906 --> 01:17:26,785 SHAUNA: You guys ready to party? 1960 01:17:26,785 --> 01:17:28,287 ‐ You don't have to tell me twi‐‐ 1961 01:17:28,287 --> 01:17:29,498 Let me take that again. 1962 01:17:29,498 --> 01:17:30,542 (laughter) 1963 01:17:30,542 --> 01:17:33,130 Sorry. 1964 01:17:33,130 --> 01:17:36,053 Guys, you can't laugh for every one. 1965 01:17:36,053 --> 01:17:39,392 You don't have to tell me twice. 1966 01:17:39,392 --> 01:17:41,438 (laughing) 1967 01:17:41,438 --> 01:17:46,448 ♪ 1968 01:17:46,448 --> 01:17:48,829 INDIANA: ♪ I'd tread ever so carefully ♪ 1969 01:17:48,829 --> 01:17:50,958 ♪ 'Cause my bad luck is your destiny ♪ 1970 01:17:50,958 --> 01:17:54,214 ♪ You keep suckin' it up, suckin' it up, suck it ♪ 1971 01:17:54,214 --> 01:17:57,178 (sobbing) 1972 01:17:57,178 --> 01:17:59,182 DIRECTOR: Cut. Nailed it! 1973 01:17:59,182 --> 01:18:01,395 (laughing) 1974 01:18:01,395 --> 01:18:04,067 ‐ Wow, you're just lumping us all‐‐ 1975 01:18:04,067 --> 01:18:05,444 (blows raspberry) 1976 01:18:05,444 --> 01:18:07,658 INDIANA: ♪ You don't even need to touch ♪ 1977 01:18:07,658 --> 01:18:10,162 ♪ Just one look and I got you hooked ♪ 1978 01:18:10,162 --> 01:18:12,333 ♪ I'll be bad luck for ya ♪ 1979 01:18:12,333 --> 01:18:13,837 ‐ Chloe! 1980 01:18:13,837 --> 01:18:14,964 Sorry. 1981 01:18:14,964 --> 01:18:17,093 I don't know what that was. 1982 01:18:17,093 --> 01:18:19,347 INDIANA: ♪ Baby, if you decide to push ♪ 1983 01:18:19,347 --> 01:18:22,605 ♪ I'll be giving you the bad luck, bad luck ♪ 1984 01:18:22,605 --> 01:18:24,609 ‐ How do we know that you guys didn't just roofie 1985 01:18:24,609 --> 01:18:27,488 this town with your radiated m‐‐ 1986 01:18:27,488 --> 01:18:29,367 Fucking fuck my life. 1987 01:18:29,367 --> 01:18:30,829 SHAUNA: That's okay, it's okay. 1988 01:18:30,829 --> 01:18:32,248 ‐ I'm so sorry, guys. 1989 01:18:32,248 --> 01:18:33,500 (groans) 1990 01:18:33,500 --> 01:18:34,837 INDIANA: ♪ Suckin' it up, suck it ♪ 1991 01:18:34,837 --> 01:18:39,220 ♪ Supernatural state of mind ♪ 1992 01:18:39,220 --> 01:18:43,187 ♪ You keep suckin' it up, suckin' it up, suck it ♪♪ 1993 01:18:43,187 --> 01:18:44,230 DIRECTOR: Cut. 1994 01:18:44,230 --> 01:18:45,483 ‐ I don't know what just happened. 1995 01:18:45,483 --> 01:18:46,861 AARON: I don't know what just happened. 1996 01:18:46,861 --> 01:18:50,242 (punk rock version of "The Wild Rover" plays) 1997 01:18:50,242 --> 01:18:56,129 ♪ 1998 01:18:56,129 --> 01:18:57,508 ‐ What? ‐ You should come 1999 01:18:57,508 --> 01:19:00,471 to New York with us for spring break. 2000 01:19:00,471 --> 01:19:03,394 (speaking over each other) 2001 01:19:03,394 --> 01:19:04,522 MISTY: What? 2002 01:19:04,522 --> 01:19:05,857 (laughing) 2003 01:19:05,857 --> 01:19:07,528 ♪ 2004 01:19:07,528 --> 01:19:09,406 YUEJIN: Seatbelts, everybody! 2005 01:19:09,406 --> 01:19:12,161 (seatbelt getting stuck) 2006 01:19:12,161 --> 01:19:14,249 ♪ 2007 01:19:14,249 --> 01:19:16,546 SINGER: ♪ And I never will play 2008 01:19:16,546 --> 01:19:19,175 the wild rover no more ♪ 2009 01:19:19,175 --> 01:19:21,848 ♪ It's no, nay, never ♪ 2010 01:19:21,848 --> 01:19:24,019 ♪ No, nay, never, no more ♪ 2011 01:19:24,019 --> 01:19:25,897 ‐ Wow, I think I love you. 2012 01:19:25,897 --> 01:19:27,901 I love you! 2013 01:19:27,901 --> 01:19:29,112 Holy shit! 2014 01:19:29,112 --> 01:19:30,657 You're my dream woman. 2015 01:19:30,657 --> 01:19:32,035 Fuck, you almost shot me, 2016 01:19:32,035 --> 01:19:33,538 but I'm really turned on right now 2017 01:19:33,538 --> 01:19:36,126 and I'm probably bleeding out and that's probably why, but... 2018 01:19:36,126 --> 01:19:40,802 SINGER: ♪ No, never, no more ♪ 2019 01:19:40,802 --> 01:19:43,140 ♪ No more ♪ 2020 01:19:43,140 --> 01:19:45,061 ♪ I went to an alehouse... ♪ 2021 01:19:45,061 --> 01:19:47,440 ‐ What? ‐ So sorry, can we‐‐ 2022 01:19:47,440 --> 01:19:49,277 Sorry, can we start over? 2023 01:19:49,277 --> 01:19:50,947 Oh my God, what the fuck? 2024 01:19:50,947 --> 01:19:52,075 (laughter) 2025 01:19:52,075 --> 01:19:54,705 ‐ She laughs every time I look at her. 2026 01:19:54,705 --> 01:19:55,957 YUEJIN: Okay. 2027 01:19:55,957 --> 01:19:57,795 SINGER: ♪ I asked her for credit ♪ 2028 01:19:57,795 --> 01:20:01,093 ♪ She answered me, "Nay" ♪ 2029 01:20:01,093 --> 01:20:04,307 ♪ "Such custom as yours, I can have any day" ♪ 2030 01:20:04,307 --> 01:20:05,644 ‐ The fuck? 2031 01:20:05,644 --> 01:20:07,564 DIRECTOR: Cut. 2032 01:20:07,564 --> 01:20:09,025 (laughing) 2033 01:20:09,025 --> 01:20:12,073 (cheering, applause) 2034 01:20:12,073 --> 01:20:13,827 ‐ Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. 2035 01:20:13,827 --> 01:20:15,580 SINGER: ♪ Never, no more ♪ 2036 01:20:15,580 --> 01:20:18,293 ♪ And it's no, nay, never ♪ 2037 01:20:18,293 --> 01:20:20,297 ♪ No, nay, never, no more ♪ 2038 01:20:20,297 --> 01:20:22,803 ♪ Will I play the wild rover ♪ 2039 01:20:22,803 --> 01:20:23,805 ♪ No, never ♪ 2040 01:20:23,805 --> 01:20:25,725 CHLOE: Pot of gold, throw your cup! 2041 01:20:25,725 --> 01:20:27,563 ‐ What? ‐ What? 2042 01:20:27,563 --> 01:20:30,442 (all shouting) 2043 01:20:30,442 --> 01:20:35,745 ♪ 2044 01:20:35,745 --> 01:20:38,000 SINGER: ♪ I never will play 2045 01:20:38,000 --> 01:20:40,504 the wild rover no more ♪ 2046 01:20:40,504 --> 01:20:43,468 ♪ And it's no, nay, never ♪ 2047 01:20:43,468 --> 01:20:45,599 ♪ No, nay, never, no more ♪ 2048 01:20:45,599 --> 01:20:48,980 ♪ No, never, no more ♪ 2049 01:20:48,980 --> 01:20:50,817 ‐ Well... 2050 01:20:50,817 --> 01:20:52,613 We're all fu‐‐ 2051 01:20:52,613 --> 01:20:54,742 SINGER: ♪ No more ♪ 2052 01:20:54,742 --> 01:20:55,994 ‐ Falafel. 2053 01:20:55,994 --> 01:20:58,457 SINGER: ♪ No more, yay ♪♪ 2054 01:20:58,457 --> 01:21:02,716 ♪ 139377

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