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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,630 --> 00:00:06,840 Still no Connor, huh? 2 00:00:07,007 --> 00:00:09,467 He hasn't been out of his room all day. 3 00:00:10,135 --> 00:00:12,679 -Oh, poor guy. -He'll be down when he's ready. 4 00:00:13,430 --> 00:00:16,683 Well, you sure he's still up there? My sister runs away all the time. 5 00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:19,728 Yeah, I don't think he can run away from home at twenty-seven. 6 00:00:20,395 --> 00:00:22,939 I wouldn't know, all of my children are still here. 7 00:00:24,065 --> 00:00:26,276 He didn't run away. I heard him moving around. 8 00:00:26,443 --> 00:00:27,819 You were listening at his door? 9 00:00:27,986 --> 00:00:31,322 {\an8}It's called parenting and I'm good at it! 10 00:00:31,489 --> 00:00:34,451 -I'll check on him after dinner. -Oh, thank you. That's so sweet. 11 00:00:34,617 --> 00:00:36,036 Hold on. What are you gonna say? 12 00:00:36,202 --> 00:00:39,289 {\an8}Don't know. I don't usually think about stuff before I say it. 13 00:00:40,749 --> 00:00:42,584 We're working on that. 14 00:00:42,751 --> 00:00:46,296 {\an8}-Remember, he's in a vulnerable place. -I know. 15 00:00:46,421 --> 00:00:49,340 And don't bad-mouth Chloe because if they get back together you look like a jerk. 16 00:00:49,507 --> 00:00:51,009 Like this one did with Georgie. 17 00:00:51,676 --> 00:00:55,263 That was different. I also said those things to his face. 18 00:00:56,890 --> 00:00:58,933 We're working on that. 19 00:00:59,100 --> 00:01:01,019 And don't say nice things about Chloe either. 20 00:01:01,186 --> 00:01:02,937 We don't want him trying to get her back. 21 00:01:03,104 --> 00:01:05,899 Y'all, I've been dumped before, I know how bad it feels. 22 00:01:06,066 --> 00:01:09,152 Oh, my God, I married you and gave you a baby. Move on. 23 00:01:42,310 --> 00:01:45,772 -Yes? -It's Georgie. I brought you some food. 24 00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:47,524 No, thanks. 25 00:01:47,690 --> 00:01:50,235 Are you sure? It's meatloaf. 26 00:01:50,401 --> 00:01:53,613 -The end piece? -All burnt and chewy. 27 00:01:55,365 --> 00:01:57,242 -Thanks. -Hold on. 28 00:01:57,408 --> 00:01:58,368 What? 29 00:01:58,535 --> 00:02:00,245 I was thinking we could hang out and talk a bit. 30 00:02:00,870 --> 00:02:02,413 -I'd rather not. -Wasn't really asking. 31 00:02:05,834 --> 00:02:08,419 I just want you to know I get what you're going through. 32 00:02:08,586 --> 00:02:09,879 You do? 33 00:02:10,046 --> 00:02:12,590 When your sister broke up with me, it hurt like hell. 34 00:02:12,757 --> 00:02:14,592 I couldn't eat. Couldn't sleep. 35 00:02:14,759 --> 00:02:17,011 I couldn't even turn on Baywatch. 36 00:02:17,762 --> 00:02:19,931 And they just added Yasmine Bleeth. 37 00:02:21,224 --> 00:02:24,102 Well, I feel like... 38 00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:27,730 Hold on. 39 00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:32,694 Hi. I was just... 40 00:02:42,370 --> 00:02:44,330 Okay, talk to me. 41 00:02:44,497 --> 00:02:48,501 Everything was good, but when she thought she was pregnant, it all changed. 42 00:02:48,668 --> 00:02:49,752 Been there. 43 00:02:49,919 --> 00:02:52,505 She didn't see me as a struggling musician anymore. 44 00:02:52,672 --> 00:02:55,091 Suddenly, I was a guy without a job 45 00:02:55,258 --> 00:02:58,344 who lives with his parents and can barely take care of himself. 46 00:02:59,220 --> 00:03:02,849 -You don't know that. -She said those actual words. 47 00:03:03,683 --> 00:03:08,062 {\an8}Yeah. And it's not like she has her life together. Her music's not going anywhere. 48 00:03:08,229 --> 00:03:09,772 Her family doesn't talk to her. 49 00:03:09,939 --> 00:03:11,482 You've got every right to be upset. 50 00:03:11,649 --> 00:03:13,526 I'm gonna call her and tell her how I feel. 51 00:03:13,693 --> 00:03:15,778 Oh, no, no, no. You don't wanna do that. 52 00:03:15,945 --> 00:03:18,781 {\an8}Why not? I'm hurting, why shouldn't she? 53 00:03:18,948 --> 00:03:22,660 {\an8}Trust me, there's no version of you making her feel guilty that goes your way. 54 00:03:22,827 --> 00:03:25,496 But it'll feel so good. 55 00:03:26,122 --> 00:03:28,666 Bro, I'm tellin' you, you've got to ride this one out. 56 00:03:29,250 --> 00:03:30,543 I don't know if I can. 57 00:03:32,378 --> 00:03:34,005 {\an8}Whatever you wanna say to her, say to me. 58 00:03:34,589 --> 00:03:37,508 {\an8}-That's silly. -Try it, it might make you feel better. 59 00:03:38,968 --> 00:03:39,928 Fine. 60 00:03:42,180 --> 00:03:45,099 {\an8}How could you do this? You said you loved me. 61 00:03:45,892 --> 00:03:46,851 Keep goin'. 62 00:03:47,018 --> 00:03:50,730 I trusted you, and you turn around and break my heart. 63 00:03:50,897 --> 00:03:51,856 Let it out. 64 00:03:52,023 --> 00:03:54,692 {\an8}We wrote songs together. I introduced you to my family. 65 00:03:54,859 --> 00:03:58,655 We had mind-blowing monkey sex every day for a month. 66 00:03:59,989 --> 00:04:01,491 And it's out. 67 00:04:04,953 --> 00:04:07,038 I hate to see him like this. 68 00:04:07,205 --> 00:04:08,706 Heartbreak's just a part of growing up. 69 00:04:09,624 --> 00:04:12,418 {\an8}You know, there was a time we didn't know if he'd even have friends, 70 00:04:12,585 --> 00:04:13,836 let alone a girlfriend. 71 00:04:14,003 --> 00:04:16,422 And look at what she did to him. 72 00:04:16,589 --> 00:04:18,007 He saw a naked woman, take the win. 73 00:04:20,218 --> 00:04:22,470 How can you put a positive spin on this? 74 00:04:23,346 --> 00:04:28,434 {\an8}Well, you know, we thought he might be alone forever. Instead there was a girl. 75 00:04:28,601 --> 00:04:31,229 He had a pregnancy scare. 76 00:04:31,896 --> 00:04:35,900 Or... He had a pregnancy scare! 77 00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:38,319 Not funny. 78 00:04:39,445 --> 00:04:41,739 {\an8}This is a good thing, Audrey. 79 00:04:41,906 --> 00:04:45,868 {\an8}You know, it's-it's kinda like Pinocchio. He's becoming a real boy. 80 00:04:46,911 --> 00:04:48,204 So what was he before? 81 00:04:49,872 --> 00:04:51,207 This is a good thing, Audrey. 82 00:04:59,882 --> 00:05:02,302 -Hey. -What? What the hell? 83 00:05:04,012 --> 00:05:06,055 What if I call her? But I promise to stay calm. 84 00:05:06,222 --> 00:05:09,225 Dude, we've been over this. You've got to be strong. 85 00:05:10,018 --> 00:05:13,313 -I feel like I'm going crazy. -I'm so sorry. 86 00:05:13,479 --> 00:05:15,356 -Thank you. -Now get out. 87 00:05:16,024 --> 00:05:19,068 -But I'm hurting. -I know. Get out. 88 00:05:20,486 --> 00:05:23,865 Why don't we let her sleep and you and me watch a movie? Get your mind off things. 89 00:05:24,574 --> 00:05:27,410 -What're you thinking? -It's hard to be sad watching Jim Carrey. 90 00:05:27,577 --> 00:05:29,620 I don't know if I'm in the mood for a comedy. 91 00:05:29,787 --> 00:05:32,457 Stephen King? Cujo, Shining, Pet Sematary? 92 00:05:32,623 --> 00:05:34,417 You know, I heard Shawshank Redemption is Stephen King. 93 00:05:34,584 --> 00:05:36,836 -You don't say. -Oh, my God, get out! 94 00:05:43,092 --> 00:05:46,763 Are you sure I shouldn't see Rocky One, Two, and Three first? 95 00:05:47,597 --> 00:05:51,059 Nah. Four's really when the series finds itself. 96 00:05:55,104 --> 00:05:57,440 Fine! I don't wanna talk to you anymore either! 97 00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:00,777 You were right. I shouldn't have called her. 98 00:06:01,944 --> 00:06:02,945 You called? 99 00:06:03,112 --> 00:06:07,325 Adrian flew to Russia to support Rocky, and I believed in love again. 100 00:06:07,992 --> 00:06:10,953 -I told you it would make things worse. -I couldn't help it. 101 00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:13,956 -Where's your backbone, man? -I'm doing my best. 102 00:06:14,123 --> 00:06:16,250 If you're not gonna listen to me, leave me out of it. 103 00:06:16,417 --> 00:06:19,045 -What is going on out here? -He called her. 104 00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:21,798 -You called her? -I called her. 105 00:06:21,964 --> 00:06:24,926 -Why would you do that? -I told him not to. 106 00:06:25,093 --> 00:06:26,886 How many times am I gonna get woken up over this? 107 00:06:27,053 --> 00:06:29,180 -He called her. -Why would you do that? 108 00:06:29,347 --> 00:06:31,182 Don't be mean to him. 109 00:06:34,602 --> 00:06:37,647 Okay, CeeCee, it's time to play "put the toys away." 110 00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:39,857 Can you help Mommy? 111 00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:43,277 Sorry, you're busy. Why don't you get back to me? 112 00:06:45,655 --> 00:06:47,156 -Hello. -What's up? 113 00:06:47,323 --> 00:06:49,909 -Can you help me make a resume? -Why? 114 00:06:50,576 --> 00:06:52,662 I need to get my life together. 115 00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:55,540 Okay. Pick up all this crap and I'll go get the laptop. 116 00:06:55,706 --> 00:06:59,293 Sure. Come on, CeeCee, help Uncle Connor. 117 00:07:05,675 --> 00:07:09,303 -Have you ever made a resume before? -I've never seen a resume before. 118 00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:12,932 Okay. Well, here's mine. We can use it as a template. 119 00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:18,688 -You type seventy-five words a minute? -Do you want my help or not? 120 00:07:20,231 --> 00:07:22,817 You have so much experience. I have none. 121 00:07:22,984 --> 00:07:25,111 That's okay. Let's just start with education. 122 00:07:27,947 --> 00:07:30,283 -You graduated high school. -Barely. 123 00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:33,077 -You went to college. -I crashed and burned in six weeks. 124 00:07:33,244 --> 00:07:35,663 Well, that's way more than Georgie and he runs a business. 125 00:07:35,830 --> 00:07:38,040 Are you trying to make me feel worse? 126 00:07:38,958 --> 00:07:40,418 Okay. What about skills? 127 00:07:43,838 --> 00:07:46,966 -You play like every instrument. -And look how far it's gotten me. 128 00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:51,554 I even suck at girls. And that's the one thing musicians are good at. 129 00:07:52,263 --> 00:07:53,681 Okay, let's at least put down your phone number. 130 00:07:53,848 --> 00:07:56,767 What? So my mommy can answer when they call? 131 00:07:57,810 --> 00:08:00,188 All right, new plan. Day drinking. 132 00:08:02,231 --> 00:08:04,567 That is the time-honored refuge of the downtrodden. 133 00:08:04,734 --> 00:08:07,612 Yep, and another thing musicians are really good at. 134 00:08:14,911 --> 00:08:17,330 I remember when me and my first boyfriend broke up. 135 00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:19,957 -Was that Dan? -You remember him? 136 00:08:20,124 --> 00:08:22,919 He used to call me Con-nerd. 137 00:08:24,295 --> 00:08:26,130 Yeah, he was great. 138 00:08:27,173 --> 00:08:30,051 -What's going on here? -I'm drinking my problems away. 139 00:08:31,135 --> 00:08:32,178 Isn't it a little early? 140 00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:34,096 What's in your hand? 141 00:08:36,015 --> 00:08:37,517 Cheers. 142 00:08:37,683 --> 00:08:39,560 Have you ever dealt with anything like this? 143 00:08:40,269 --> 00:08:41,812 A breakup? Sure. 144 00:08:41,979 --> 00:08:43,064 Really? You and Mom broke up? 145 00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:47,068 I wasn't only with your mother. I had a life. I sowed my oats. 146 00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:51,113 Hey, it wasn't for my oats you wouldn't be here. 147 00:08:54,408 --> 00:08:55,368 So who was she? 148 00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:59,163 It was Pamela Jenkowski. 149 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:03,793 She was two years older than me in all the right places. 150 00:09:06,295 --> 00:09:08,589 Used to walk her home from school. 151 00:09:08,756 --> 00:09:11,592 Carried her books and gave her my class ring to wear. 152 00:09:12,635 --> 00:09:14,554 Then her dad got transferred and they moved away. 153 00:09:16,264 --> 00:09:18,891 Yeah, well, you know, we promised we'd write, 154 00:09:20,184 --> 00:09:22,603 but one letter a week turned into one letter a month, 155 00:09:23,354 --> 00:09:27,692 and finally I got a box in the mail with my ring in it 156 00:09:29,026 --> 00:09:33,573 and a note that said she'd 157 00:09:35,741 --> 00:09:36,867 met someone else. 158 00:09:42,039 --> 00:09:43,708 But I'm over it. 159 00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:49,880 And here's your keys. 160 00:09:50,047 --> 00:09:52,216 -Thanks. -Oh, you like Pearl Jam? 161 00:09:53,009 --> 00:09:54,510 -Yeah. -Cool. 162 00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:56,596 I don't mean to be rude, but do you have a boyfriend? 163 00:09:57,597 --> 00:10:00,474 -You're asking me out? -No, no. I'm married. 164 00:10:00,641 --> 00:10:03,394 But my brother-in-law is single, and he loves music. 165 00:10:03,561 --> 00:10:05,313 I saw Pearl Jam a couple years ago. 166 00:10:05,479 --> 00:10:06,689 -In Denton? -Yeah. 167 00:10:06,856 --> 00:10:08,941 -I was at that show. -So good. 168 00:10:10,318 --> 00:10:12,486 -What are you doing? -It's called customer service. 169 00:10:13,654 --> 00:10:15,323 -You're hitting on her. -You're hitting on her. 170 00:10:15,489 --> 00:10:18,242 For Connor. Great guy. More hair than this one. 171 00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,245 I'm gonna go now. 172 00:10:22,246 --> 00:10:23,205 Can I at least get your number? 173 00:10:23,372 --> 00:10:24,540 Or can I? 174 00:10:26,584 --> 00:10:28,127 Congratulations. You scared her off. 175 00:10:28,961 --> 00:10:30,671 -She'll be back. -How do you know? 176 00:10:30,838 --> 00:10:35,051 She got a Subaru with a hundred-and- eighty-thousand miles on it. She needs me. 177 00:10:42,391 --> 00:10:44,644 Yeah! Drink, sucka. 178 00:10:46,145 --> 00:10:47,313 Why are you so good at this? 179 00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:50,024 Six years of college, sucka. 180 00:10:52,818 --> 00:10:54,945 What is going on? 181 00:10:55,780 --> 00:10:57,490 Mandy's showing us what she learned in college. 182 00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:00,910 That Dad paid for, 'cause he's a what? 183 00:11:01,786 --> 00:11:03,245 Sucka. 184 00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:06,874 So, this is your plan? Get him drunk? 185 00:11:07,541 --> 00:11:09,960 Dad was actually telling me about the first time he got dumped. 186 00:11:11,170 --> 00:11:13,047 Pamela Jenkowski. 187 00:11:13,714 --> 00:11:15,925 You're just jealous 'cause she took my flower. 188 00:11:18,427 --> 00:11:22,431 How much have you had to drink? And who's watching CeeCee? 189 00:11:22,598 --> 00:11:27,353 Oh, relax, Captain Buzzkill. I dropped her off at Mary's on the beer run. 190 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:30,731 -I'm not Captain Buzzkill. -Great. Here you go. 191 00:11:32,733 --> 00:11:35,903 -There's a ping-pong ball in this. -Oops, sorry. 192 00:11:38,531 --> 00:11:43,077 -So did anyone ever break your heart? -Actually, I've never been dumped. 193 00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:45,204 -Lame! -Boring! 194 00:11:45,371 --> 00:11:49,667 Hey! Just because I did the breaking up doesn't mean it was easy. 195 00:11:49,834 --> 00:11:51,919 It's hard to be that person too. 196 00:11:52,086 --> 00:11:53,671 -Lame! -Boring! 197 00:12:01,137 --> 00:12:02,638 Drink, drink, drink, drink. 198 00:12:02,805 --> 00:12:06,267 -What's going on? -Beer pong. You're on my team. 199 00:12:07,935 --> 00:12:11,772 -Who's watching the baby? -She's at your mother's, Captain Buzzkill. 200 00:12:14,316 --> 00:12:15,359 Here you go. 201 00:12:15,526 --> 00:12:18,028 -Ooh, you know what we should do? -Order pizza? 202 00:12:18,195 --> 00:12:20,823 No. Well, yes. 203 00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:28,038 But also box up everything that Chloe left in your room 204 00:12:28,706 --> 00:12:30,207 and set it on fire. 205 00:12:30,374 --> 00:12:32,877 Yeah. Screw that bitch. 206 00:12:33,919 --> 00:12:37,798 Hold on. Let's all take a little break. Nobody's setting anything on fire. 207 00:12:38,466 --> 00:12:41,886 It's official. You married a dork. 208 00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:52,146 This is so nice, getting drunk as a family. 209 00:12:54,231 --> 00:12:59,195 -Thank you for today. -Don't thank me. Thank Lone Star. 210 00:13:01,030 --> 00:13:04,366 -I know what I need to do now. -You try and call her, I will kill you. 211 00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:08,496 No, I'm gonna buckle down and focus on my music. 212 00:13:09,038 --> 00:13:11,040 -Good for you. -Oh, are you gonna start a band? 213 00:13:11,207 --> 00:13:13,626 -Or teach? -Better. 214 00:13:14,293 --> 00:13:17,755 I'm gonna write some songs and send them to Doctor Demento. 215 00:13:17,922 --> 00:13:21,425 And he is... a psychiatrist? 216 00:13:22,843 --> 00:13:27,556 He's a DJ. He plays all kinds of cool underground stuff on his show. 217 00:13:27,723 --> 00:13:29,517 I'm sorry. 218 00:13:29,683 --> 00:13:33,729 The plan to turn your life around is sending a tape to someone named Demento? 219 00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:35,439 Doctor Demento. 220 00:13:35,606 --> 00:13:38,692 Didn't mean to diminish his medical degree. 221 00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:42,279 I need to get to work. 222 00:13:46,450 --> 00:13:48,369 He's gonna live here forever. 223 00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:53,457 Or... He's gonna live here forever! 224 00:14:22,027 --> 00:14:23,070 Is that the song? 225 00:14:23,988 --> 00:14:25,197 Sounding good, Bubba. 226 00:14:25,364 --> 00:14:27,616 No, this is just a little pump-up music I wrote 227 00:14:27,783 --> 00:14:30,286 to get myself psyched to write the song. 228 00:14:31,078 --> 00:14:33,831 -Oh, like Rocky's training music. -Exactly. 229 00:14:37,626 --> 00:14:41,839 -I finished my song. -Play it, play it. 230 00:14:42,548 --> 00:14:44,300 It's called "Do the Axolotl." 231 00:14:45,301 --> 00:14:47,511 I'm already confused. 232 00:14:47,678 --> 00:14:49,263 An axle what? 233 00:14:49,930 --> 00:14:52,433 An Axolotl. It's a Mexican salamander. 234 00:14:53,809 --> 00:14:56,020 Do the Axolotl 235 00:15:01,108 --> 00:15:03,527 Coughing up blood on the side of the road 236 00:15:05,821 --> 00:15:08,532 I've been run over by a heavy load 237 00:15:11,327 --> 00:15:12,828 But life's no issue 238 00:15:12,995 --> 00:15:15,372 When I regenerate my tissue 239 00:15:15,539 --> 00:15:17,583 Do the axolotl 240 00:15:19,585 --> 00:15:21,462 More confused. 241 00:15:22,379 --> 00:15:23,297 It's about the breakup. 242 00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:27,468 H-How is this about the breakup? 243 00:15:27,635 --> 00:15:30,220 I-I did some research, and it turns out 244 00:15:30,387 --> 00:15:35,351 an axolotl is one of the few creatures on Earth that can regenerate its own heart. 245 00:15:35,517 --> 00:15:37,144 That's what I'm hoping to do. 246 00:15:38,479 --> 00:15:42,066 -W-Why didn't you say that in the song? -I did. Were you even listening? 247 00:15:44,318 --> 00:15:47,446 Come on, do it Do the Axolotl 248 00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:48,948 It's so good, sweetie. 249 00:15:49,114 --> 00:15:50,282 So you get it? 250 00:15:50,449 --> 00:15:51,533 Come on dance your pants off 251 00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:53,953 It's so good, sweetie. 252 00:16:35,285 --> 00:16:37,162 "Do the Axolotl." 253 00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:43,544 Do the Axolotl 254 00:16:48,799 --> 00:16:51,260 Coughing up blood on the side of the road 255 00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:56,056 I've been run over by a heavy load 256 00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:58,642 Catchy! 257 00:16:58,809 --> 00:17:03,063 But life's no issue When I regenerate my tissue 258 00:17:03,230 --> 00:17:05,607 Do the Axolotl 259 00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:07,609 I like it. 20446

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