All language subtitles for gumball01.14

[ Upbeat music plays ]

>> Dad: And that's why you
should never mix pop rocks and
soda.

>> Mom: Okay...
Anyone else have a riveting
tale?

>> Dad: I do!
>> Mom: Oh, Richard, let's hear
from the children.

>> Gumball: Well, penny asked me
out on a date.
No biggie.

>> Mom: She did?!
That's great news!
What did she say?

>> Gumball: Well...
Excuse me -- what?!
>> Do you want to come 'round my

house this Saturday?
>> Gumball: Me? With you?
At your place?

>> You see, it's Mr. cuddles'...
[ Dreamlike music plays ]
>> Gumball: [ Sighs ]

Yeah, that's about it.
>> Mom: Oh, my little boy is
becoming a man.

[ Both grunting ]
>> Gumball: Mom!
>> Darwin: Man, you're my hero.

You're going on this big date,
and you're not even nervous!
I'd be freaking out!

I mean, think about it -- if you
blow it, she'll never speak to
you again, and you'll be left

alone for the rest of your life
and never find happiness!
>> Mom: don't worry, sweetie.

Just be yourself.
That's all a girl wants.
>> Gumball: [ Sighs ]

Thanks, mom.
>> Mom: See you after work.
>> All: Bye!

>> Dad: [ Laughs ]
[ Door opens, closes ]
Ah.

>> Gumball: What?
>> Dad: Listen, son, ignore
everything your mother just

said.
>> Gumball: Why?
>> Dad: Look, women only think

they want us to be ourselves
because they don't know how
wretched we actually are.

What you have to do is think of
someone really cool and
attractive and be them.

>> Gumball: R-really?
But -- but, anais, is this true?
>> Anais: I'm gonna have to go

with dad on this one.
You're kind of a loser, gumball.
>> Dad: Exactly.

>> Anais: Sorry.
>> Gumball: What am i gonna do?
I really like penny.

I want her to like me, too.
>> Darwin: You could start by
being romantic, dress up a

little, buy her some presents.
>> Gumball: Well, i can't do any
of those things.

I don't have any money.
>> Dad: Listen, son, you don't
need money to show a girl a good

time.
You think i have money?
>> Gumball: Uh...No?

>> Dad: Do you see mom leaving
me?
>> Gumball: Yeah, every day to

go to work and earn money.
>> Dad: [ Laughs ]
There's other ways to get stuff

without spending money.
Do you want to hear the secrets
kept for centuries by watterson

men?
>> Gumball: I...Don't have any
choice, do i?

>> Dad: No!
Come with me.
First things first -- we need to

get you some nice clothes.
>> Gumball: Yeah, penny loves
fashion!

That's a great idea!
>> Dad: Here we are -- the
greatest department store in the

world, where everything is free!
[ Flies buzzing ]
So, anything new?

Whoo! That's nice.
>> Gumball: What?
You're going to get my date

clothes out of a dump?
Oh, man, that's gross.
>> Dad: I didn't hear you

complaining when i gave you that
sweater.
>> Gumball: What?!

My favorite sweater came out of
the dump?!
>> Dad: [ Chuckling ] No.

don't be silly.
I found it in a sewage outlet.
>> Gumball: Oh, man.

I wear this all the time.
>> Dad: You are gonna look
smashing.

>> Gumball: You think so?
>> Dad: Right.
You've got the look, but you're

going to need a bit of money in
your pocket so you can treat her
on the date, and I'm going to

show you a great way of getting
money for free.

Behold -- the credit card!
I simply take this magic card,

insert it like so, type in the
secret magic number that mom

told me, and money comes out of
the little mouth!
It works every ti--

ah, ah, ah-choo!
[ Blows nose ]
[ Beeping ]

You see?
Here you go, son.
>> Gumball: Awesome!

Hey, hey, beautiful.
Oh, hey, penny.
I didn't see you there.

Yeah, i was just passing by --
you know, chillin' with my new
hat.

Ha ha.
I think I'm ready for my date.
>> Anais: Are you?

Have you even considered how
you're gonna behave on this
date?

>> Gumball: Yeah, I'm probably
gonna be well-behaved.
>> Anais: I mean, like, manners

and etiquette.
>> Gumball: U-uh...
Aah!

>> Anais: Start by pouring
Mrs. pumpernickel a cup of tea.
>> Gumball: I don't wanna.

>> Anais: Why?
>> Gumball: 'Cause she's looking
at me funny.

See?
>> Anais: Gumball, she's a doll.
Why don't you try having a

civilized conversation with her?
>> Gumball: All right.
So, how was your day,

Mrs. pumpernickel?
Oh. I see.
Too good to talk to me, huh?

[ Voice breaking ] You think
you're better than me with your
fancy, little cups and

"la-de-da" friends?
Well, you know nothing about
life, Mrs. pumpernickel!

And this is what i do to your
fancy China!
[ Sobbing ]

>> Anais: Gumball, just get out
of my room.
>> Gumball: Okay, so, I'm set.

Got my look, i know where I'm
taking her.
I'm ready to go.

>> Darwin: There's one thing
you're not ready for.
>> Gumball: What's that?

>> Darwin: This!
>> Gumball: Ow!
What was that?

>> Darwin: The unexpected, and
you weren't prepared for it.
>> Gumball: Oh.

Uh, i-i see what you mean.
>> Darwin: Follow me to the
training camp.

>> Gumball: Where?
>> Darwin: Just come to the
backyard.

You've got to be prepared for
anything on this date, because
anything could happen.

>> Gumball: Like what?
>> Darwin: What if someone tries
to mug you?!

>> Gumball: I don't know.
Call the police?
>> Darwin: [ Imitates buzzer ]

Wrong.
Knock his block off!
>> Gumball: Enh.

Like that?
>> Darwin: Uh, that was good.
But it's better to finish with a

wisecrack.
Women love that.
>> Gumball: Like what?

>> Darwin: Like "welcome to
punch town -- population, you."
>> Gumball: Are you sure this is

gonna help me with my date?
>> Darwin: Totally.
>> Gumball: Okay.

>> Darwin: [ Deep voice ] Hi.
I'm penny's father, and i don't
approve of you because you don't

have any prospects.
>> Gumball: Hah!
I'm sorry, daddy, but you're

grounded.
>> Darwin: [ Snootily ] Oh,
hello.

I'm Sebastian lonkwin,
penny's successful ex-boyfriend.
>> Gumball: Hah!

Looks like this "ex" is catching
some z's.
>> Darwin: [ Normal voice ] Is

that all you got?!
What do you say to someone who
doesn't believe in love?

>> Gumball: Hah!
You don't need that heart.
>> Darwin: Actually, that was a

little too extreme, but I'll
give you an 8 out of 10.
Good job, soldier.

[ Sighs ]
The hardest part of my job is
watching them leave.

>> Gumball: So?
>> Dad: Oh, son!
You look like a million bucks!

>> Darwin: I'm proud of you,
buddy.
Did you remember to -- hah!

Very good, because i thought
you were gonna be surprised!
Okay.

But will you be prepared for --
third surprise?!
>> Gumball: That one was pretty

obvious, dude.
>> Darwin: Oh.
>> Gumball: This is gonna be the

greatest date ever!
[ Doorbell rings ]
>> Gumball: Hey.

>> Oh, thanks for coming,
gumball.
You look...Uh...Dressed.

I guess you should come in.
>> Gumball: Oh, well, that's one
way to get in the house.

[ Laughs ]
>> Right.
>> Gumball: So, what do you want

to do today?
>> Today is the funeral.
>> Gumball: Oh.

>> For Mr. cuddles, my pet.
>> Gumball: Oh, thank goodness.
I thought it might be a real

funeral.
[ Laughs ]
I...Mean, pets -- pets are

great, like part of the family.
So, what happened to him?
>> My dad flushed him down the

toilet by mistake.
>> Gumball: [ Stifled laugh ]
That's terrible.

Did he go 'round and 'round or
straight down?
>> Straight down.

I'm penny's father.
>> Gumball: Wah-hah!
Blocked.

>> Right.
Come to the backyard.
The service is about to start.

>> Gumball: [ Sighs ]
Penny, I'm sorry.
I thought this was a date.

Why didn't you tell me it was a
funeral?
>> I did, in the corridor at

school.
Do you want to come to my house?
It's Mr. cuddles' funeral.

I could use some support from a
friend.
Gumball, are you even listening?

>> Gumball: This Saturday,
4:00 P.M.
it's -- it's a date.

[ Giggling ]
Oh, oh. Oh, yeah.

don't worry.
I'm still here for you, penny.

>> Thanks, gumball.
>> Gumball: Awesome!

...day for remembering those who
have left us.
Shall we go?

[ "Amazing grace" plays on
bagpipes ]

[ Thunder crashes ]
>> Gumball, perhaps you'd like
to say a few words about

Mr. cuddles.
>> Gumball: Uh, o-of course.
Well, Mr. cuddles was penny's

pet.
Even though i never met him,
penny's pretty hot, so I'm sure

he was pretty hot, too.
[ Thunder crashes ]
>> Thank you, gumball.

That was really special.
>> My picture!
>> Gumball: Huh?

>> My sister made a photo
tribute so we can all remember
Mr. cuddles.

>> Gumball: Aw, how thoughtful.
>> Want to see?
>> Gumball: Aaaaaaaaaaah!

A spider! Knock his block off!
That's awful! I hate spiders!
Who would want something that

creepy in their house?
Ew, ew, ew!
>> [ Crying ]

>> Listen, son, i think it's
best you leave.
>> Gumball: I'll, uh, let myself

out.
>> Play on, dear.
¶ oh, Danny boy ¶

¶ the pipes, the pipes -- ¶
>> gumball: Uh, sorry.
It's me again.

Can i use your bathroom, 'cause
it's kind of a long --
>> it's the second on the left

upstairs.
>> Gumball: Thanks.
[ Rapid footsteps ]

>> ¶ From Glen to Glen ¶
>> gumball: Have a nice funeral!
>> Just get out of here!

>> Gumball: Aw, man, what is
wrong with me?
She's never gonna forgive me

for that.
I'll spend the rest of my life
alone and never find happiness.

>> [ Hisses ]
>> Gumball: Aaaaaaaaah!
A spider! Knock his block off!

No, wait.
>> ¶ but come ye back -- ¶
>> gumball: Hey!

I found Mr. cuddles!
He's on the toilet!
>> Is he trying to say

something?
>> Gumball: He's on the toilet!
Look! The toilet!

>> Just ignore him.
¶ and white with snow ¶
>> gumball: [ Sighs ]

I guess I'll have to show them.
Come here, little fella.
Who's a good spider?

Who's a lovely, good spider?
Oh, good boy, mister --
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Get off, get off, get off,
get off, get off!
Aaah! Aaah!

Aaaaaaah!
Aah! Aaaaah!
Ow! Ow! Ow!

>> [ Gasps ]
>> don't look.
You'll just encourage him.

>> Gumball: Ow!

[ Groans ]
Ha ha!
>> [ Chomps ]

>> Gumball: Ow!
>> Aah!
Mr. cuddles?

You're back!
I thought you were gone forever!
>> Where did you find him?

>> Gumball: In the toilet
somewhere.
>> Gumball, this is amazing.

>> Gumball: Oh, yeah, yeah, it's
great.
>> Son, i stand corrected.

I thought you were a
good-for-nothing, young
troublemaker, but no, you're --

>> gumball: Yeah, whatever.
One question -- is that spider
poisonous?

'Cause it just bit me.
>> Yeah, but it's like a
bee sting.

You'd have to be bitten, like,
150 times for it to be
dangerous.

>> Gumball: Okay, thanks.
If you'll excuse me, I'll go
now.

Bye.

>> Anais: Ugh.
He looks real bad.
>> Darwin: Disgusting.

>> Mom: He looks awful.
>> Dad: He'll never play the
clarinet again.

>> Gumball: [ Groaning ]
>> Mom: Shh, shh, shh.
He's waking up.

>> Dad: [ Laughs ]
Looking good, champ.
>> Mom: Someone's here to see

you, honey.
>> Hi, gumball.
>> Gumball: [ Muffled ] Uh, hey,

penny.
>> I brought someone along who
wants to say "sorry."

Right, Mr. cuddles?
>> [ Hisses ]

>> Dad: [ Panting ]
Come on, you guys!
We're gonna be late!

>> Gumball: Remind me again
exactly why we're at school on a
Saturday.

[ Screech! ]
>> Dad: Are you kidding me?
It's club day.

It's the only day of the week
when i get to hang out with
people i really like.

>> All: What?!
>> Dad: Uh, uh...
Got to go!

>> Mom: Okay...
See you all back here at 5:00.
>> Gumball: But wait!

I don't have a club to go to!
Well, mom, looks like it's your
lucky day.

I'm coming with you to your
anger-management club.
>> Mom: Oh, that's sweet,

gumball, but behind this door,
I'm a very different person.
Trust me, you don't want to see

this.
>> Hello, Nicole. Welcome to --
aaach!

Uuuuuh.
>> Anais: Could you guys keep it
down a little?

>> Mom: You keep it down!!
>> Gumball: Hey, anais.
[ Whoosh! ]

What club are you in?
>> Anais: Physics club.
>> Gumball: Well, today's your

lucky day, because i --
>> anais: Let me stop you right
there.

You know there are different
types of intelligence?
>> Gumball: Yeah.

>> Anais: I don't think you have
any of them.
>> Gumball: I don't get it.

>> Anais: Exactly.
>> Gumball: Oh, come on!
Oh, let me in!

[ Grunts ]
don't be a club hog!
[ Scoffs ]

Fine.
Dad, can i join your fantasy
club?

>> Dad: [ With brogue ] Who be
therrre?
>> Gumball: It's me -- gumball.

>> Darwin: Be you orc?
>> Gumball: No.
>> Dad: Be you dwarf?

>> Gumball: No, I'm your son.
>> Dad: Be you bearer of savory
snacks for the elders?

>> Gumball: What?
No.
>> Dad: Then begone!

>> Gumball: [ Sighs ]
>> Darwin: What's up?
>> Gumball: Man, there's got to

be a club for me somewhere.
>> Darwin: You could always join
my club.

>> Gumball: What is it?
>> Darwin: Synchronized
swimming!

[ Classical music plays ]

>> Gumball: Hmmm.
You're good, but i can do
better.

Here comes the swan dive of
eternal beauty!
[ Swan calling ]

[ Bubble! Bubble! Bubble! ]
[ Pip! ]
[ Coughing ]

So, how graceful was that?
>> Darwin: Dude, you can't swim.
>> Gumball: [ Coughs ]

Fair point.
Uh...Has anyone seen my trunks?
>> Yeaaah!

Touchdown!
>> All right!
>> Slam-dunk!

>> Both: Yeeaaaahh!
>> Gumball: Uh, hey, guys.
Is this the football club?

>> Both: Yeeaaahh!
>> Gumball: Well, uh, did i miss
the game?

>> No, it's going on right out
there.
>> Gumball: Why aren't you

playing?
>> Both: 'Cause we're the
reserve team!

>> Gumball: Cool.
So, can i join?
>> I don't know.

Are you man enough?
>> Gumball: [ Scoffs ]
Me?

I'm at least 50% man.
>> Well, in that case, here's
your towel.

>> Gumball: Thanks.
So...Do you guys ever get to
play?

>> Nah, we just hang out here
and act kinda sporty.
>> Gumball: You guys just take

showers, hang around in towels,
and high-five each other?
>> Heh!

There's a little bit more to it
than that.
[ Whirl! Crack! ]

>> Gumball: Aah!
[ Whirl! Crack! ]
Ow! Okay!

[ Crack! ]
Ow!
Okay, okay!

[ Whirl! Whirl! Whirl! ]
[ Crack! Crack! Crack! Crack! ]
[ Crack! Crack! ]

[ Rumble! ]
>> Hey, Hector, is the game
over?

>> Yeah.
We lost.
>> Oh.

>> Gumball: What?
[ Whirl! Whirl! ]
[ Crack!! ]

>> All: Aaaahhh!
>> Gumball: Aah.
Aah.

Ohh.
Heh.
[ Door locks ]

Oh, why doesn't anyone want me
in their club?
It can't have anything to do

with me -- my talent, my
intelligence, or my general
awesomeness.

You know what?
Too bad for you jealous people,
'cause I'm starting my own club,

and you are not invited!
Okay, I'd like to welcome
everyone to "gumball's club of

gumball."
First order of business --
attendance.

Hmm.
Pretty good.
Now, it seems like recently

we've been let down by
certain...Family members.
So i propose a little exercise

in trust.
Okay, don't worry, gumball.
Just close your eyes, let

yourself fall back, and someone
will catch you.
Well, I'm a bit scared, gumball.

Well, that's why it's called a
trust exercise.
Come on, dude.

Mm...
Okay.
[ Inhales deeply ]

[ Thud! ]
[ Grunts ]
[ Sighs ]

All in favor of disbanding the
club, say "aye."
Aye.

Motion carried.
Aw, man.
I'm such a reject.

I wish there was a club for
people like me that no one
liked.

I'd join that club in a second.
I wouldn't even care what it was
about.

[ Eerie whispering ]
Huh?
Uh...What's going on?

>> Look no further, fellow
loser.
>> Gumball: What the...?

>> We are the unloved, the
weird.
>> Gumball: [ Gasps ]

>> Let me introduce you to...
>> Gumball: [ Whimpers ]
>> ...The reject club!

Always accepting new members.
>> Gumball: [ Snickers ]
Thanks.

I'm desperate, but not that
desperate.
>> No, wait!

We really need new members.
We're so bored of talking to
each other, we've been phoning

up the speaking clock for
conversation.
If you want, you could be our

president or something.
Or -- or -- or even better, our
king!

Picture this --
gumball watterson, king of the
rejects!

>> All: Eh?
>> Gumball: What?
King of the rejects?

Seriously?
[ Laughs ]
Thanks for the offer, guys, but

it's a "no."
[ Chuckling ] King of the
rejects.

>> He rejected us.
>> And laughed at our
loneliness.

>> Well, we'll see if he's still
too good for us when we've
finished with him.

To the nerd-mobile!
>> All: ¶ nuhn, nuhn, nuhn,
nuhn, nuhn, nuhn, nuhn, nuhn,

nuhn, nuhn, nuhn, nuhn, nuhn,
nuhn, nuhn, nuhn, nuhn, nuhn,
nuhn, nuhn, nuhn, nuhn ¶

>> gumball: Rejected, even by my
own family!
>> Mom: Look, honey, you're not

a baby anymore.
You need to be able to do things
on your own.

>> Dad: Oh, there must have been
one club that wanted you.
>> Darwin: Yeah -- the rejects

club.
>> Gumball: But i politely
declined.

>> Dad: Aaaaah!
Oh, it's okay.
It landed in the vegetables.

Aaaah! The cake!
>> Gumball: Look -- there's a
DVD tied to it.

[ Beep ]
>> Greetings, gumball watterson,
from our secret lair.

>> Anais: Isn't that just the
library?
>> Dad: Shh! There's more!

>> So, you think you're too good
for us, eh?
Well, you'll soon change your

mind when we upload your
embarrassing school record in a
web video hosted by none other

than you.
My name is gumball watterson,
and my i.Q. Is smaller than my

shoe size.
I wore diapers up till the age
of 11, and i once got detention

for calling miss simian "mum."
>> Dad: Aah!
He looks just like you!

>> Our revenge plan is almost
complete.
>> Uploading.

10 minutes till completion.
>> Mwa-ha-ha-ha!
And...Cut.

How was i? Evil enough?
>> Gumball: Oh, great.
Now the nerds are bullying me.

I guess you want me to deal with
this on my own.
>> Mom: No.

When someone picks a fight with
one of us, they pick a fight
with all of us.

Everybody, get in the car.
We've still got time to stop
them.

>> Dad: But where is their
secret hideout?
>> Anais: It's in the library!

[ Tires screech ]
>> Gumball: Noooo!
It's locked!

My reputation is ruined!
>> Mom: No, not yet.
Quick -- someone make me angry.

>> Dad: Uhhh...I taped a
wrestling match over our wedding
video.

>> Mom: Rrrrrrrrrgggghhhh!
Go on without me!
Unh!

I'm out of contro-o-o-o-l!

[ Screech! ]
>> Thou shalt not pass!
>> Dad: You've crossed the wrong

wizard, young man!
I am level 40!
Let the battle commence!

>> Hurrah! I get the first shot.
Meteor sword!
>> Dad: Eugh! Ah! Ooh! Eh!

He's good, but i can't afford to
lose.
Magic iron!

>> Doinggg!
Deflected by the shield of
rampor!

[ Both gasp ]
>> Both: Free spell!
>> Uh!

>> Dad: You'll have to go
without me.
I'm stuck for the next two

turns.
>> Gumball: Come on!
The computer's just up ahead!

[ Screech! ]
>> Darwin: [ Gasps ]
Watch out!

[ All gasp ]
>> Gumball: [ Sighs ]
Relax.

It's only bobert.
I can take him.
>> Initiating combat mode.

[ Beeping ]

[ Growls ]
>> All: Aaaaaahhh!

>> Anais: don't worry, guys.
I got this.

Ehhhhhhhhhhh...
>> Gumball: What are you doing?

>> Anais: Leave it to me.
Just go around him.

>> Gumball: Are you sure you're
gonna be okay?

>> Anais: don't worry.
The power of physics has never

failed me yet!
[ Guns cock ]

[ Crackle! ]
[ Crash! ]

[ Whir! Whir! Whir! Whir! ]
>> [ Powering down ]
>> Gumball: The computer!

This is our chance to stop the
upload.
>> 30 seconds to completion.

>> Darwin: [ Gasps ]
There's a guard!
>> Wsshhh! Wsh! Wsh! Wsh!

Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh.
Eh-eh-eh!
>> Darwin: That guy looks pretty

dangerous.
>> Gumball: What are we gonna
do?

>> Darwin: Leave it to me.
>> Wsh! Wsh!
>> Darwin: Come on, punk.

>> Hmm?
>> Darwin: Let's dance.
[ Classical music plays ]

>> [ Gasps ]
Such grace!
The rhythm...

Must...Synchronize!
>> Gumball: Thanks, buddy.
>> 5 seconds to completion.

>> Gumball: Yes!
My reputation is safe.
>> 4 seconds till completion.

[ Video-game noises ]
>> Gumball: Aaaah!
>> 3 seconds.

>> Gumball: Eh! Eh!
>> 2 seconds.
1 second till completion.

>> Gumball: [ Grunting ]
>> Upload complete.
>> Gumball: Nooooooooooo!

>> Sending to all school
contacts.
>> My name is

gumball Trisha watterson.
That's right -- Trisha is my
middle name, and i was born

without eyebrows and need to
draw them on every day.
On hot days, i smell like pâté,

and teachers are advised not to
mention it.
Also, i have a glandular

problem that causes --
>> gumball: Okay!
Okay.

You win.
I'll join your club.
>> Are you kidding?

Have you seen your school
record?
We're desperate, but we're not

that desperate.
[ Laughter ]
>> Gumball: [ Sighs ] Great.

Rejected by the reject club.
Well, that's my reputation
ruined until college.

>> Anais: No, it isn't.
I counter-hacked the main school
server and rerouted the e-mail

before it got to anyone.
>> Gumball: [ Sighs ]
Oh, thank you, sis.

>> Darwin: don't worry.
We'll always be there for you.
>> Anais: You're part of the

watterson club...Trisha.
>> Gumball: Yeah, and whose
great idea was that?

>> Dad: What's wrong with it?
It's short for "tristopher."
>> Mom: Richard, i thought we

agreed on "Christopher."
>> Dad: Christopher,
tristopher -- same thing, right?

>> Darwin: So, what shall we do
with these guys?
>> Mom: Well, i think the

responsible thing to do would be
to drive them home and tell
their parents what they've done.

[ Muffled grunting ]
>> Darwin: No?
Then how about we spray you in

honey and drop you off in the
bear cage at the zoo?
[ Muffled grunting ]

>> Gumball: Okay, maybe you'd
prefer to be dropped off naked
at the mall?

[ Muffled grunting ]
All those in favor, say "aye."
>> All: Aye!

>> Gumball: Motion carried.