Original subtitles

Oh, my

God.

When I was a kid back in Minnesota, I had a Cub Scout den mother, a Mrs. Fry

Fogle. She taught us backwoods common sense.

Like, don't drop crumbs on the trail.

Because you never know what kind of critter might be right behind

you, picking up the pieces.

I'll never forget the motto she taught us.

Be prepared.

Now, it's been said that the best company you could have in a strange

place is a map.

This particular map documents the plans of some heavy-handed troublemakers.

Folks back home figure if I can get a hold of it, the trouble might stop.

Great thing about a map, it can get you in and out of places a lot of different

ways.

That is far enough.

The map.

I'd like to.

But, uh, I really need it myself.

You amuse me.

Sorry.

But I really do need it.

Oh my God.

It just goes to show you, a good map will always get you where you want to

go.

Well, the map got me home, but a newspaper publisher made sure I didn't

get to stay long.

Seems there's this problem in Central America.

One time, I was maybe seven or eight, my dad and I took a truckload of apples to

market in another town.

As soon as we got there, even as little as I was, I felt there was something

real wrong in that town.

When I asked my dad about it, he said they'd lynched an innocent man there.

I was a lot older before I understood exactly what that meant.

How you doing, guys? What's the haps here? Nice girl. Kind of reminds me of

my sister.

Oh, I'm sorry. Maybe you guys don't recognize me. The name's Jackson. Andrew

Jackson. You may have seen my picture on the front of the $20 bill. You know what

I'm talking about.

Yeah, I thought you'd understand.

Nice doing business with you guys.

Inks MacGyver.

I'm looking for a photographer by the name of Kate Connolly.

Her publisher said I might find her here.

Look, if I've come at an inconvenient time... Who is this publisher?

Arthur Prescott.

He hasn't heard from Miss Connolly in quite some time, and seeing how things

are around here, he got worried enough to... To send you down here?

I'm supposed to believe that?

Well, Diego, he's probably telling the truth.

I'm almost out of the soup.

Okay, you.

Come on in.

Senor, I am a terrible shot.

I might try to just wound you a little bit.

So, you be very careful.

I'm harmless.

Hi.

So, your name's MacGyver and you're harmless.

What do you want?

Well, actually, it's what your publisher wants.

He wants you back home, safe and sound.

So he sent you?

Well, none of his letters or phone calls worked.

You've got to admit, I'm a little bit in a telegram.

And that's Dave Ryerson.

He's not even supposed to be in this hemisphere unless he's in jail.

How do you know him?

Well, we met once before he was deported to the States.

Yeah?

No, Dave kind of blamed me for that.

You? May come in handy.

If you're a publisher, handy means getting you out of here.

Uh-uh.

I've got a big story cooking.

We've been digging for weeks, and I'm almost there.

Katie's story could also help us get rid of a piece of human garbage from our

government.

General Antonio Vasquez?

Oh, yeah, the army guy who runs the secret police.

I understand he has some big career moves in mind, too.

He's got the men. He just needs the arms.

And he's dealing for them.

Now? With Ryerson and the crime syndicate.

The deal's set for today, and if... when I get the pictures... Look,

I need the pictures.

So your job is to help me get into Ryerson's hacienda.

Oh, excuse me, ma'am, but my job is to get you out of the country.

MacGyver, you can do both.

We would be most grateful if you could help us.

Then we leave the country.

Senor?

You're going to need these.

Actually, I'd do much better without them. Thanks.

Mind if I borrow something from the camera bag?

It depends what.

Just that camera strap.

I need one with a plastic clip. That wire's got enough juice in it to

straighten your hair.

You'll be happy next time I lose my door key.

You know, this place is none too... This spot's just fine.

Not the safest.

Look, if you're nervous, why don't you wait on the other side of the wall while

I... Here's Ryerson.

Here comes Vasquez.

Deal's going down now.

I can't wait. I can't wait. I understand.

Excellent thing for me.

All right.

All right. Now, here we are.

I don't know where this came from.

Looks like an army surplus store in there.

Oh, perfect.

What do you think? Ryerson is showing the general his sample case.

I can assure you my organization can guarantee delivery of all the light

weapons in 30 days, General.

That's everything you needed, isn't it?

And the tank.

Three months.

We're ready to start unlimited shipments there.

Is it a deal?

A very complex deal.

Very risky for both our futures.

A lot of film.

Good. It's time to get out of here.

I need one more shot.

The handshake.

What?

Yes.

It is a deal.

I'm an accredited correspondent, and you have no right to do this.

I haven't had the pleasure of meeting the lady before, General.

But I'd like to introduce you to an old buddy of mine I've been hoping to run

across again.

Welcome to our country, MacGyver.

Look, I'm warning you, my newspaper knows where I am.

Yeah, so they'd hunt Mother MacGyver here to get you out.

That is why you're here, isn't it, MacGyver?

Well, now, Dave, it just might be that I'm working on getting you kicked out of

this country, too.

You know, I'm going to enjoy your funeral.

Down here, they make quite a fiesta of things like that.

Lots of tequila, some dancing girls.

You may even shed a tear or two.

You have both won an invitation.

Don't you realize the chance you'd take harming us?

My newspaper would... Write a touching obituary.

Now have the film be shot. No.

Let's not be dumb about this, what do you say?

Getting sensible, MacGyver?

Sure.

Here you go, Dave. I think it was that one. I can't.

You

know,

Ryerson, now that the evidence is gone,

There's probably no need to kill it.

There's no need at all, is there, General?

You probably wouldn't mind if we just kind of moseyed on it, huh?

I want my cameras back.

Just give me the rest of the film and your other camera, too.

Come on.

Yeah, I think a little cooperation would go a long ways in this situation, don't

you? Hey, what?

What is that stuff? A stick.

Silly putty with a bang.

Photograph they'll never be published Better not, my friend, or we're both

dead. The enemy's out there. But you have brought them to me.

All right, so it went haywire. I was afraid something would go wrong. It can

be fixed.

With a little help from your arm.

I can do the developing at the darkroom.

Huh?

He really meant, you know, being the right, the true.

It would be kind of mean that he... No.

It's because of the kind of man he was, Kate.

Get that film out.

I promise you.

MacGyver.

Every time something happens around here, they've locked the airport down.

Troops pour all over every friendly embassy.

Roads are blocked.

Just look.

This whole town's already under military guard.

Yep, that's right.

So we take film out ourselves.

Cross the border into Mexico.

That's more than 100 kilometers.

How are we even going to get out of here?

I've been thinking about that. You mind if I borrow something?

What? You don't need a bag for just one camera, do you?

I can put this draft to good use.

Bye.

Thank you.

You ready when I get back?

Ready for what?

Are you afraid we don't hear you?

Friend of yours.

Miss McGyver.

That was terrific.

We made it.

Yeah.

But the border's still 100 kilometers.

And I know Ryerson.

He won't give up even.

Hey MacGyver, level with me.

Are we gonna make it?

We made it this far, didn't we?

Somehow. I'm not reassured.

We'll stay on the main highway.

You work a search pattern heading north.

Check every road, every mule pattern.

When I woke up this morning, I had three very expensive cameras.

Well, at least you didn't wreck this one.

This is my lucky camera.

If anything happened to this baby, I'd die.

Or kill.

So where are you from, MacGyver?

I started out in Minnesota.

Since then.

Here, there, this place, that place.

Trouble with the law or itchy feet?

A little of that.

Mostly I wanted to see how the world works.

Meet people, learn how they're different, the same.

MacGyver, you are a romantic.

No, no.

Just a guy who... bought a blank race.

How things could be worse.

You're right. You convinced me.

We're in a lot of trouble.

So how far are we from the border?

Oh, about ten miles.

How are you going to start a fire?

Make lightning or rub two sticks together?

No. I thought I'd use a match.

Oh, shucks, MacGyver.

I was looking forward to seeing some more of your Boy Scout stuff.

What was that?

Sounds like supper to me.

Supper. MacGyver, you don't eat things like that. You call pest control.

Yeah, they taste an awful lot like chicken.

I don't care if they taste like beluga caviar. I am not eating lizard.

Mmm.

Mmm. Very next dinner party I give.

Rest of lizard on a MacGyver.

Delicious.

You're a very unexpected man, MacGyver.

You... keep me off balance.

Sorry?

No.

I think... I think I like it.

Want to share?

It's quite awful.

Is that a yes?

Or no?

They're not inside.

Then they're on foot.

Good.

Every time something else goes wrong, you say it is good.

Your soldiers have been on the ball back there at the plaza. You are talking to a

general.

I thought I was talking to my new partner.

But the border is less than ten miles to the north.

Look, General, why don't you try keeping half your troops back here, behind them,

pushing them forward so they can't double back?

There's only one road leading to the border, and we control it. So if they

want to cross the border, they have to come through here to us.

So it's just a matter of time.

That's what you told me 50 kilometers ago, Ryerson.

Well, if your plan fails and they get through, I will not deport you.

I will destroy you.

Even if it's my last act in us.

What do you see?

Two men with guns. What do you see?

Opportunity knocking.

You know, you could stand to lose a few pounds.

Rat.

Buenos dias, you guys.

Shake it.

Name's MacGyver.

We're the ones you're looking for.

And fellas, this here is your lucky day.

Because you get to turn us in.

Listen, would you mind holding her? She weighs a ton.

All

right,

Connelly. Yes, yes. Now you're getting the hang of things.

My lucky camera, it's wrecked.

Well, now, I'll bet you we can get it fixed about nine miles up that road.

I'm sorry.

Anytime, MacGyver.

Well, I like that kind of talk.

You're not more than an hour behind us.

We must be damn close to that border.

MacGyver, we are just about there.

We are there, Kate.

That's Mexico.

Right there.

On the other side of that river.

What do you think?

You know, I got to admit, these two boys know what they're doing.

They got every approach to the border locked up tight, and there's just no

going around them.

Well, I guess we're just going to have to go through them.

Attack.

With what?

That's a good question.

Yeah.

There's nothing you can do. Nothing.

Mexican border patrol.

You better watch.

Keep score.

It's not bad.

What are we going to do, MacGyver?

Start a war, I guess.

You make it sound so easy.

Just to keep me from thinking about how scared I am.

Keep searching.

You gotta be up there. You gotta be.

Airplane report, nothing.

It's the first time I ever deliberately tried overheating engine.

Okay, now have a lot of dirty oil.

What's that do for the war effort?

The military calls it chemical fog.

Civilians get more to the point.

It's air pollution.

What does the MacGyver-Connolly team call it?

Long shot.

Running low on fuel.

Returning to base. I don't care if you're low on fuel. Keep looking.

When this heats up, it ought to make some pretty good-looking smog.

Where are they?

Can't just disappear like shadows. Look, General, your troops are here and behind

them. Every exit's sealed off.

You've done a good job. No panic.

So you feel we have them?

Caught between us?

I know it.

Either they come out our way or they don't come out at all.

Smoke bombs, dink bombs, rolling bombs, juggernauts. I feel like Rosie the

Riveter in a jury-rigged bomb factory.

Quite an inventory.

I must be proud of them.

Hey, it has my approval.

How are we going to get this darn thing across the river?

Under their noses.

General,

we got him!

Bueno!

Great.

And smart.

Watch for them now.

Watch for them.

Shoot anything that moves.

Okay, you ready?

If things don't work out, I'm really glad I got to know you.

Me too.

Pull it!

You have anything to declare

No,

David

It's too late

I Always keep my promise

I thought your camera was broke.

I fixed it.

MacGyver style.