Original subtitles

[ ALARM SOUNDING ]

[ POLICE SIRENS APPROACHING ]

FREEZE!

YES, SIR, MR. NEWTON.

JO?

DADDY...

DON'T EVEN TRY TO EXPLAIN, YOUNG LADY.

I KNEW SOMETHING WAS WRONG

WHEN YOU LEFT THE COMPOUND

IN HAWAII.

IT WAS EMPTY. I WAS BORED.

SO YOU DECIDED TO COME BACK HERE AND DO THIS INSTEAD?

SURE BEATS EATING ALONE.

I'M VERY DISAPPOINTED IN YOU.

SO WHAT?

WHAT, ARE YOU GOING TO GROUND ME

FOR THE REST OF THE SPRING BREAK?

I HAVE SOMETHING ELSE IN MIND...

SOMETHING THAT'S BEEN IN THE WORKS

FOR A LONG TIME.

IT'S WHAT YOU AND EVERYONE YOUR AGE

REALLY NEEDS.

WHATEVER IT IS, I DON'T NEED IT.

WE'LL SEE ABOUT THAT, JO.

TAKE HER BACK TO THE HOUSE.

NO! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME GO BACK TO THAT SCHOOL!

♪ FREE LIKE A FAVOR ♪

♪ I SEE YOU FALLING FOR IT ♪

♪ BELIEVE IN DESTINATION ♪

♪ PRINT, COMPILE HALF THE PLEASURE ♪

♪ BREED, SPIT OUT, REPLICATE ♪

♪ WHATEVER MAKES IT BETTER ♪

♪ SO GREEN TO WAIT THE STORMS OUT ♪

♪ YOUR NECK SHOOTS OUT FROM COVER ♪

♪ CONTEMPT ON THE WITNESS STAND ♪

♪ SAY IT'S LIKE MODERN NATURE ♪

♪ MODERN HATRED ♪

♪ IN A DAY YOU'RE MADE ♪

♪ IN A DAY YOU'RE DEFINED ♪

♪ IN A DAY YOU'RE SAVED ♪

♪ IN A DAY SURVIVED ♪

♪ SO LEAN WITH ALL YOUR WEIGHT ON ME ♪

SEE THAT?

YOU SLAM THE NOSE,

MESSES YOU ALL UP,

THE EYES FILL UP WITH WATER--

IT'S NOT ANY KIND OF FUN.

WOW, SKITTLES.

♪ UNVEILED ALL A WORK IN PROGRESS ♪

♪ BETWEEN HERE AND DISCOVERY ♪

♪ I GO ON, I GO ON ♪

♪ CLASS ACTION LEARNED BEHAVIOR ♪

AS USUAL, THE RECEPTION SUCKS.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE BE WEARING THE WHITE SOCKS.

OH! OH, OH, GOD.

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, GOD.

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU.

COREY, YOU STUD, YOU.

EMILY...

YOU'RE...TALLER.

YEAH. TWO WEEKS' VACATION

WILL DO THAT TO YOU.

IS EVERYONE HERE YET?

WELL, WILL'S AROUND HERE SOMEWHERE.

I'M NOT SURE ABOUT THE OTHERS.

YOU'RE HOT-BOXING IN THE ROLLS?

[ SCREAMING ]

EXCUSE ME, MADAM.

WHAT'S UP, GIRL?

I PICKED HIM UP ON THE WAY HERE.

YOU WENT TO HIS NEIGHBORHOOD IN THIS?

OH, PISH-POSH, YOUNG EMILY.

IT WAS QUITE AN EMBARRASSMENT, REALLY,

WHAT WITH THIS BEING SUCH A DATED RIDE AND ALL.

HOW WAS VACATION?

OH, THE USUAL.

A FREEWAY TRIP TO A THEME-PARK STATE

WITH PARENTAL DNA STRANDS.

A LAME TIME WAS HAD BY ALL.

I HEAR THAT.

YES. YES, INDEED.

OH, PLEASE.

THEY'RE NOT FOR YOUR VIEWING PLEASURE.

THEN FOR WHOM DOES THOU BELLS TOLL?

TO THE ONE WHO RESCUES ME FROM THE IRON CLUTCHES

OF EMOTIONALLY

AND HORMONALLY CHALLENGED MALE TEENAGERS,

SUCH AS YOURSELF.

YEAH, YOU DESERVED THAT, BRO.

HEY, GUYS.

HEY, ASTRO-BOY.

EMILY.

HI, DAN.

SO, ANYBODY SEEN JO AROUND YET?

HEARD SHE WASN'T COMING BACK.

YOU WISH.

WELL, IF YOU DO SEE HER, TELL HER I'M LOOKING FOR HER.

WHATEVER. SURE. OKAY.

CATCH YOU ON THE REBOUND.

YEAH, "REBOUND" IS RIGHT.

COME ON, LET'S ROLL.

GENERAL ASSEMBLY SEQUENCE COMMENCED.

AUTOMATED PREPARATIONS INITIATED.

HEY, CHECK IT OUT.

THAT'S NEW.

THINK THEY'RE IN THE BATHROOMS?

PROBABLY. WHAT'S NEXT?

TANKS AND SPY SATELLITES, IF YOU ASK ME.

IT'S ALL ABOUT BIG BROTHER.

BIG BROTHER?

IT'S A BOOK!

I KNEW THAT. I HAD THREE COPIES, MAN.

YO, I'VE GOT TO HOOK UP

WITH ONE OF THOSE PALM PDAs,

BECAUSE THE BROTHER'S RUNNING OUT OF ROOM

IN HIS ROLODEX.

YOUR COUSINS DON'T COUNT, BUDDY.

WHATEVER, MAN. CHECK IT OUT.

LOOK, IT'S MR. PORN HIMSELF.

WHAT ABOUT MICHELLE?

YOU THINK HE'S TAPPING THAT ASS?

YEAH, THAT'S WHY SHE'S NOT HERE.

SHE'S PROBABLY ALL TIED UP.

PROBABLY LOADED HER

WITH HIS HARD-CORE COLLECTION.

HE BROUGHT HER OVER TO THE PORN SIDE

WITH HIS FAVORITE FILM, "GOOD WILL HUMPING".

OR MAYBE "AIR SLAP A BITCH".

HOW ABOUT "SHAVING RYAN'S PRIVATES"?

NO, I GOT IT.

"CROUCHING CROTCH, HIDE MY DRAGON".

AS IF YOU GUYS KNOW.

SHE WON HIM OVER WITH HER FAVORITE MOVIE,

"GLAD HE ATE HER".

WHAT DO YOU CALL THIS?

GIVE ME THOSE.

I WANT YOU TO STAND UP AND FACE YOUR PEERS...

FOR THE REST OF THE ASSEMBLY.

WELCOME.

WELCOME BACK FROM SPRING BREAK, EVERYONE,

FELLOW STAFF AND STUDENTS OF THE ROYAL COLLEGIATE COLLEGE,

D INVITED GUESTS.

YOU KNOW, THIS IS TRULY A TURNING POINT

IN OUR SCHOOL'S NEW MILLENNIUM...

AND SO IT'S FITTING

THAT RCC SHOULD LIVE UP TO ITS MOTTO, NON NOBIS SOLUM,

AND SET THE TREND

FOR THE BEST AND MOST ADVANCED

AND MOST PERSONAL-SAFETY-CONSCIOUS SCHOOL

OF THE 21st CENTURY.

PERSONAL SAFETY CONSCIOUS, MY ASS.

AS YOU ALL HAVE NOTICED,

THERE'S BEEN A LOT OF SIGNIFICANT CHANGES MADE

TO THE CAMPUS

WHILE YOU WERE GONE OVER THE SPRING BREAK.

MR. WILLIAM NEWTON,

A GRADUATE OF OUR FINE ALMA MATER

AND OUR SCHOOL'S BIGGEST BENEFACTOR,

HAS GRACIOUSLY DONATED TO RCC

A BRAND-NEW HIGH-TECH COMPUTER SECURITY SYSTEM,

THE N2K.

THIS IS THE SAME SECURITY SYSTEM

THAT WILL BE INSTALLED

TO PROVIDE SECURITY ON A NUMBER OF MILITARY BASES

AROUND THE WORLD,

AFTER WE HAVE COMPLETED THE BETA TESTING HERE,

OF COURSE.

SO WE SHOULD BE AWARE

THE SCHOOL IS NOW EQUIPPED

WITH AN ARRAY OF SENSORS AND CAMERAS

THAT ALLOW THE COMPUTER AND ME TO COORDINATE AND MONITOR

JUST ABOUT EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS HERE AT RCC.

REST ASSURED, THIS IS AN INTEGRATED SYSTEM,

AND FOR THE MOST PART

SHOULD NOT INTERFERE WITH YOUR DAILY ACTIVITIES.

THERE IS, HOWEVER,

ONE KEY ELEMENT THAT WILL AFFECT ALL OF YOU.

IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO ENTER ANY BUILDING

OR PASS THROUGH ANY DOOR

WITHOUT FIRST IDENTIFYING YOURSELF.

YOUR STUDENT CARD WILL NOW BE USED

WITH THE CARD-READERS ALL OVER THE CAMPUS,

UNLOCKING ONLY THOSE AREAS

TO WHICH YOU HAVE BEEN GRANTED ACCESS.

[ JO ]: THIS IS MY PUNISHMENT?

HE HAS GROUNDED ME AT SCHOOL.

WELL, MAYBE THIS WILL HELP.

IT'S FOR YOU.

AN UNLIMITED SPENDING LIMIT?

YEAH, DON'T YOU WISH, GIRL?

IT'S A BYPASS CARD.

IT'LL UNLOCK ANY DOOR ON THE SYSTEM.

I STRONGLY ADVISE YOU

KEEPING A DISTANCE FROM THESE FENCES.

ANYTHING THAT TOUCHES THEM WILL BE INSTANTLY HIT

WITH AN ELECTRIC SHOCK

THAT WOULD TAKE DOWN A 300-POUND GORILLA.

I'M NOT MAKING THIS UP.

THIS IS STRICTLY FOR EMERGENCY PURPOSES ONLY.

I JUST HATE TO SEE YOU LOCKED IN AND TRAPPED ANYWHERE.

WHAT ABOUT THE SECURITY RISK OF ME ESCAPING FROM THIS PRISON?

NOT THAT THERE'S ANYWHERE TO ESCAPE TO,

EXCEPT MAYBE SOME DREADED GENETICALLY MUTATED HILLBILLY

AND HIS THREE-HEADED FISH CHILDREN.

HA HA HA. VERY FUNNY.

THIS IS NO PRISON.

THIS IS ONE OF

THE FINEST SCHOOLS IN THE COUNTRY.

I'D HAVE GIVEN MY RIGHT ARM

TO HAVE THIS OPPORTUNITY WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE?

YEAH?

ALL YOU NEED IS A BILLIONAIRE FATHER

THAT DOESN'T WANT YOU AROUND.

REMEMBER ALL WE TALKED ABOUT?

CHANNEL ALL THAT BAD RIGHT INTO GOOD, REMEMBER?

YOU REALLY CARE, DON'T YOU.

NAH. IT'S JUST FOR SHOW.

SEE?

NOW, I KNOW THIS IS ALL NEW,

SO I'LL BE AVAILABLE TO EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU...

YEAH, FOR PERSONAL MOLESTATION.

...TO ANSWER ANY QUESTIONS THAT YOU MAY HAVE.

NOW, THE MOST IMPORTANT REASON I CALLED YOU HERE TODAY,

THE ORIGINAL SCHEDULE FOR THIS WEEK

HAD A FIELD TRIP STARTING AT THE END,

HOWEVER...

[ SAWING ]

HEY!

SO WE'VE DECIDED TO REVERSE THINGS A LITTLE.

THERE ARE SOME UNFINISHED THINGS IN THE N2K COMPUTER SYSTEM,

SO WE DECIDED TO REVERSE THINGS A LITTLE.

THE BUSES FOR RUSSELL AND WILSON HOUSES

WILL LEAVE FOR THE GEOGRAPHY TRIP

IMMEDIATELY,

AND THE REST, IN ONE HOUR.

COME ON, HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT.

I'M SURE YOUR PALM PDQs

WILL SURVIVE THIS MINOR RESCHEDULING.

I'M ALSO INSISTING

THAT FIVE PREFECTS FROM EACH HOUSE

STAY BEHIND

TO HELP MAKE SURE

THAT EVERYTHING IS READY WHEN YOU GET BACK,

AND THAT IS ALL.

GOOD DAY, EVERYBODY.

GOOD DAY.

HE CAN'T BE SERIOUS.

UNBELIEVABLE.

I GUESS I'M MISSING

BRADEEN'S ORIENTATION SPEECH.

WHAT A SHAME.

HEY, I CAN SEE YOUR PREFECT TRIBE NOW.

I THINK I'LL GO SAY HELLO.

WHAT'S YOUR DEAL WITH THEM?

OH, THEY SEEM LIKE DECENT KIDS, JOANNE.

MAYBE THEY'D BE GOOD FRIENDS FOR YOU.

MAYBE YOU OUGHT TO THINK ABOUT

WORKING ON BEING A GOOD FRIEND FOR THEM.

OH, GEE, THANKS, DAD.

JUST A THOUGHT.

IT'S YOUR LIFE. DO WITH IT AS YOU WISH.

ALL RIGHT.

YOU KNOW THE DRILL.

YOU CALL ME IF YOU NEED ANYTHING.

HAVE A GOOD SEMESTER, JOANNE.

AH...

I DO THINK IT'S A LITTLE LAME

THAT YOUR BODYGUARD IS YOUR BEST FRIEND.

YOU TAKE CARE.

THANKS FOR THE COCKTAIL, MR. BRADEEN.

MY PLEASURE.

I'M GLAD THAT THE READERS OF HITECHDIGEST.COM

ARE SO INTERESTED IN RCC'S NEW SECURITY SYSTEM.

YES, VERY MUCH SO.

IT'S THE FUTURE OF SCHOOLS EVERYWHERE.

WELL, HERE YOU ARE, MR. BRADEEN.

IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE I CAN DO YOU FOR?

NO, THAT'S GREAT, BOB. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

IF YOU NEED TO GET ANYWHERE IN THIS SCHOOL,

YOU JUST LET ME KNOW, OKAY, MR. WALSH,

'CAUSE I GOT

THE KEYS FOR EVERYTHING, ALL RIGHT,

AND IF YOU WANT TO TAKE ANY SPECIAL PHOTOS...

THAT'S EVERYTHING, BOB. THANK YOU.

OKAY. THAT'LL BE IT.

DO YOU MIND? I'M ENTERING THE CODE.

IT SEEMS VERY...

SIMPLE.

YES, ACTUALLY.

THE N2K'S AN EXTREMELY EFFICIENT MACHINE.

FOR EXAMPLE,

WHILE THE STUDENT BODY IS AWAY,

E COMPUTER WILL SHUT DOWN

ALL NON-ESSENTIAL SYSTEMS.

NOW, THE PREFECTS ARE HERE.

THE COMPUTER

WILL BECOME AWARE OF THEIR PRESENCE,

AND TAKE CARE OF ALL THEIR NEEDS.

AWARE OF THEIR PRESENCE?

THAT IS THE GENIUS OF THE N2K, MR. WALSH.

IT GROWS BY

THE INPUT DEVICES CONNECTED TO IT.

ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE.

MR. NEWTON PREFERS

WE USE THE TERM "HIGH MODULAR INTERFACE."

APPARENTLY, HE USED HIS OWN BRAINWAVE PATTERNS

AS PART OF N2K'S PROGRAMMING.

I SEE.

IT SOUNDS A LITTLE BIG-BROTHERISH.

WE ALL NEED A BIG BROTHER'S PROTECTION

NOW AND THEN,

DON'T WE, MR. WALSH?

SHALL I GET THAT PICTURE NOW?

CERTAINLY.

WELL?

COME ON, C, IS SHE NAKED OR WHAT?

HOLD ON.

AW, WHAT THE HECK?

HEY, YOU GUYS GET THE SHOT YOU WANTED?

JO!

I KNOW, COREY AND ME AND THE CAMERA...

SEE, THERE WAS THIS BIRD, RIGHT...

ACTUALLY, WE JUST CAME BY TO GRAB YOU.

RIGHT.

NO, REALLY.

BRADEEN WANTS US ALL IN HIS OFFICE ASAP.

WHATEVER.

WE'RE SERIOUS.

BIRD.

BIRD. WHAT?

TABERNAC.

USELESS PIECE OF AMERICAN GARBAGE.

I'VE HAD BLENDERS THAT WERE SMARTER THAN YOU.

I CHECKED THE ORDER LIST BY HAND LAST WEEK,

AND IT BALANCED PERFECTLY,

BUT YOU, MY FRIEND, YOU LIKE TO SCREW WITH ME, HEIN?

DOGGIE-STYLE.

YOU THINK YOU KNOW BETTER

WHAT I SHOULD ORDER FOR A THOUSAND KIDS?

OH, WE BOTH KNOW I SPEAK THE TRUTH, HEIN?

ONE DAY, I WILL KILL YOU JUST TO PROVE IT,

BUT TODAY, JUST THIS.

GOODBYE, YOU BASTARD BLIND DOG FROM HELL.

NON NOBIS SOLUM. NON NOBIS SOLUM.

THANK YOU.

"NOT FOR OURSELVES ALONE".

THOSE LATIN WORDS

ARE THE FOUNDATION OF THIS SCHOOL.

IT'S THE FIRST THING YOU SEE WHEN YOU ENTER THE BUILDING.

IT'S THE FIRST THING YOU SEE WHEN YOU VIEW OUR WEBSITE...

OR AT LEAST IT USED TO BE.

OH, BABY, BABY.

YOU KNOW SOMETHING?

I USED TO BE QUITE A PRACTICAL JOKER

I THINK OF MYSELF AS HAVING A REALLY FINE SENSE OF HUMOR,

BUT THIS...THIS IS TOO MUCH.

WAY TOO MUCH.

THIS DEGRADES THE STUDENTS, THIS DEGRADES THE SCHOOL,

AND THIS DEGRADES ME,

AND THAT'S THE REASON THAT YOU GUYS, YOU FIVE CLOWNS,

ARE NOT GOING ON YOUR GEOGRAPHIC TRIP.

YOU HAVE GOT TILL THE END OF THE WEEKEND

TO TELL ME WHO'S RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS

OR THERE WILL BE NO GRADUATION FESTIVITIES

OF ANY KIND--

THAT'S INCLUDING YOUR, UH, PROM NIGHT.

MR. BRADEEN, YOU CAN'T CANCEL SOMETHING LIKE PROM NIGHT

OVER SOMETHING AS STUPID AS THAT.

I CAN CANCEL ANYTHING I WANT TO CANCEL.

HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO FIND OUT

WHEN EVERYBODY'S GONE?

YOU'RE THE SCHOOL PREFECTS. YOU FIGURE IT OUT.

YOU WANT US TO SPY ON OUR OWN HOUSES?

WHATEVER IT TAKES.

NOW, MR. VESSEY AND MS. SHAW

WILL HELP YOU WITH ANYTHING YOU NEED.

LIKE A SWINGERS' PARTY?

I HEAR MS. SHAW'S PRETTY GOOD ON WHEELS.

GET OUT! GET OUT.

YOU STAY.

I WANT TO GET ONE THING CLEAR,

MS. NEWTON.

JUST BECAUSE YOUR FATHER GIVES MONEY TO THE SCHOOL,

IT'S STILL MY SCHOOL, UNDERSTAND?

ABOUT THIS LETTER.

WELL, AT LEAST BRADEEN SCORED US DINNER.

LAST REAL FOOD

UNTIL CHEF LICK-ME TAKES OVER OUR TESTES.

I SWEAR I SAW AN EYEBALL

IN ONE OF HIS SOUPS ONCE.

DID YOU KNOW

THAT IF YOU SWALLOW SOMEBODY'S EYEBALL,

YOU SEE EVERYTHING THEY'VE SEEN IN THEIR ENTIRE LIFE?

LOOKING FORWARD

TO SOME HUGH HEFNER EYEBALL SOUP.

OH, BROTHER.

WHERE DO YOU COME UP WITH THIS STUFF, WILL?

EVER READ THE FINE PRINT ON CAR LEASES?

SHH. HERE COMES THE GUILTY PARTY.

EMILY, KNOCK IT OFF, ALL RIGHT?

SHE'S HAVING A HARD TIME AT HOME.

SO, JO, WHAT HAPPENED?

NOTHING.

THE GUY'S GOT SUCH A HARD-ON FOR ME.

YOU WISH.

BRADEEN CAN'T DO ANYTHING.

YOUR FATHER OWNS THIS SCHOOL.

OH, GEE, COREY,

DO YOU REALLY THINK THAT'S WHY HE DOESN'T LIKE ME?

HE KNOWS ONE OF US DID IT.

FACE IT. WE'RE SCREWED NO MATTER WHAT.

OH, NO.

GRADUATION ACTIVITIES ARE GOING TO BE CANCELED.

WHATEVER WILL WE DO?

WE ALL KNOW IT WAS YOU.

SHE DIDN'T DO IT, EMILY.

WHAT? YOU'RE VEGETARIAN.

IT'S NOT LIKE YOU'LL EAT IT.

LOOK, WE'VE GOT TO ADMIT,

EVEN IF SHE DID DO IT,

BRADEEN CAN'T DO ANYTHING TO HER ANYWAY.

MAYBE WE SHOULD TELL HIM IT WAS HER.

THEN IT TAKES EVERYONE OFF THE HOOK.

SURE. DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT?

WHY NOT BLAME ME?

THAT'S REALLY

WHAT BRADEEN WANTED TO TALK TO ME ABOUT.

HE ALREADY KNEW IT WAS ME.

SO THERE. HAPPY NOW?

GRAD NIGHT'S BACK ON.

JO, WAIT, SHE WAS ONLY KIDDING.

NO, I WASN'T.

JO...

JO!

THEY'RE GOING TO BLAME ME ANYWAY.

HMM, MANGLER.

HEY, KIDS.

WANT TO REALLY SCREW WITH SOMEONE BIG-TIME?

THE MANGLER

IS TRULY THE VIRUS YOU'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR.

IT WILL DESTROY THE LIVES OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW...

FRIENDS, FAMILY, NO ONE IS SPARED.

THE MANGLER WON'T STOP THERE.

JUST FOR FUN, IT WILL MESS WITH YOU,

SPREADING ITS WAY THROUGH YOUR SYSTEM

AFTER DOWNLOADING,

SO FOR HOURS AND HOURS OF UNHEARD EVIL,

DOWNLOAD THE MANGLER NOW.

OH, MANGLER, YOU'RE MY HERO.

ONCE AGAIN, THE INTERNET IS MY FRIEND.

SEE YOU ALL IN HELL.

DAN?

WHAT ARE YOU DOING CLIMBING INTO MY WINDOW?

MY CARD...

MY CARD DOESN'T WORK HERE.

WELL, WHY DON'T YOU HAVE EMILY LET YOU IN?

FORGET IT.

YOU ALMOST RUINED MY MANDELBROT.

YOUR WHAT?

MY MANDELBROT.

MY POSTER?

CHAOS THEORY? INFINITE PATTERNS?

READ IT.

HERE, LOOK.

IT'S ABOUT HOW THERE'S ORDER IN CHAOS.

UM, CAN I...SIT?

SIT DOWN. SURE.

OKAY.

IT'S ABOUT HOW THERE'S ORDER IN CHAOS,

HOW YOU CAN FIND REPEATING PATTERNS

THAT LEAD TO SEEMINGLY RANDOM EVENTS.

I MEAN, THERE ARE COMPLEX MATHEMATICAL EQUATIONS

THAT CAN PREDICT AND EXPLAIN TOTALLY RANDOM THINGS...

LIKE...LIKE SNOWFLAKES.

MOVING ART.

EXACTLY.

YEAH.

MY T-SHIRT HAS ONE, TOO.

YOU REALLY LIKE THESE MANDELBOOBIES...

UH, UM...

MANDELBROTS.

YES.

ORDER OUT OF MY CHAOS.

SO, UH, WHAT ARE YOU DOING ONLINE?

SO, YOU'RE HERE TO...

UH...

TO INVITE YOU TO THE LUAU,

AND TO TELL YOU

THAT I DON'T THINK IT WAS YOU

THAT MESSED WITH THE SCHOOL'S WEBSITE.

I MEAN, WHY WOULD YOU? RIGHT.

RIGHT.

OKAY, LET'S GO.

YEAH.

WHATEVER.

POWER FAILURE?

IT'S PROBABLY THAT BETA-TESTING

BRADEEN WAS TALKING ABOUT.

YEAH, PROBABLY.

UH, LISTEN...

WHAT?

YOU KNOW THAT THING BEFORE?

YEAH.

UM, OKAY,

WELL... IT WASN'T REALLY...

WELL, I WASN'T...

IT'S NO BIG DEAL.

GO ON.

GEEZ. WRONG SIZE.

LET'S SEE WHAT WE GOT...HERE.

CAN'T A FRENCHMAN TAKE A SHIT IN PEACE?

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, I'M SORRY.

MAKING ALL THAT NOISE...

TABERNAC.

SCARED THE PISS OUT OF ME.

MAN CAN'T SIT ON HIS OWN TOILET,

HE HAS TO COME DOWN TO MINE?

I'VE GOT TO GET SOME WORK DONE.

GEEZ!

YEAH, THIS ONE HAD BETTER BE THE ONE.

[ SNIPPING AND SCREAMING ]

I'LL WATCH OUT FOR YOU.

HOW ABOUT IT?

I THINK I'LL JUST SIT ON THE BOARD TONIGHT.

ALL RIGHT.

WATCH THIS.

WHOA!

ASK NOT WHAT YOU CAN DO

FOR YOUR DRUG DEALER.

ASK WHAT YOUR DRUG DEALER

CAN DO FOR YOU.

ANOTHER MILLION BRAINS THAT MARCH.

NOW, OFF YOU GO TO WASHINGTON TO PROTEST.

IF YOU THINK I'M GOING TO SLEEP WITH YOU...

ALL THE TIME.

GRACEFUL.

A LITTLE BIT.

WHAT?

NOTHING.

WILL?

WILL?

I'M JUST PLAYING, GIRL.

I GOT YOU, THOUGH.

Y'ALL THOUGHT IT WAS JAWS OR SOMETHING, DIDN'T YOU?

HELLO, MY FRIEND. MY NAME IS JEAN BLACKSTEAU.

I COME FROM VERY FAR IN SEARCH OF SOME FRIENDSHIP.

COME ON. YEAH. YEAH.

I GOT Y'ALL, THOUGH, DIDN'T I?

A LITTLE BIT TOO MUCH.

YOU WAS SCARED, WASN'T YOU?

YOU FREAKED ME OUT.

AW, MAN.

WHERE'S THE PARTY AT?

TAKE THOSE OFF.

HEY, JACQUES.

HEY, GUYS.

SO, DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY IDEA

HOW WE'RE GOING TO RESOLVE

OUR LITTLE PROBLEM?

IT DOESN'T MATTER ANYMORE ANYWAY.

GRAD NIGHT MATTERS, JO.

MAYBE IT MATTERS TO YOU, EMILY,

BUT BY TOMORROW MORNING,

I THINK BRADEEN'S GOING TO HAVE

A LOT MORE TO WORRY ABOUT

THAN SOME STUPID WEBSITE GAG.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

WHAT WOULD YOU SAY

IF I TOLD YOU THAT BY TOMORROW MORNING,

THE WHOLE SCHOOL WAS GOING TO BE SHUT DOWN?

HOW?

JUST A LITTLE SOMETHING I FOUND ONLINE.

WHAT?

THE MANGLER VIRUS.

MANGLER VIRUS?

JO, YOU DIDN'T.

YOU DID!

THAT'S WAY BETTER THAN MY STUPID WEBSITE JOKE.

OOPS.

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THAT.

FORGET ABOUT WHAT I DID.

JO, YOU SAVED MY ASS.

OKAY, BUT YOU GUYS HAVE TO PROMISE ME

THAT YOU WILL NOT TELL ANYBODY,

AND I MEAN IT.

PINKY?

FINE.

SO, JO, HOW DID YOU DO IT?

WHAT PROTOCOLS DID YOU USE?

RELAX. THEY CAN'T TRACE IT BACK TO ME.

EVEN IF THEY TRY,

I BURIED MY COVERT WORK WITH ENCRYPTION SOFTWARE

SO DEEP THE FBI COULDN'T EVEN CRACK IT...

AND JUST IN CASE THEY EVER DID,

I USED AN ANONYMOUS PROXY TO HIDE MY TRUE ISP NUMBER.

JO, WILL YOU MARRY ME?

HEY!

HOLD UP, JO.

WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU SENT THE VIRUS INTO THE SYSTEM?

I DON'T KNOW. LIKE, 20 MINUTES AGO.

THAT MEANS...

OH, SHIT.

YEAH.

WE'RE DOOMED.

WE'RE THE ONLY ONES LEFT.

THAT MEANS BRADEEN'S GOING TO BLAME US FOR THE VIRUS.

WAY TO GO.

UNLESS WE MAKE IT LOOK LIKE

BRADEEN GOT AN INFECTED EMAIL FROM SOMEBODY ELSE.

AND JUST HOW ARE YOU GOING TO DO THAT?

IT'S EASY.

I MEAN, ALL I NEED IS A FEW MINUTES ON HIS COMPUTER.

WELL, THEN, WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR?

LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

WHY AM I HERE?

I SHOULD BE A FAMOUS CHEF BY NOW,

BUT, NO, I'M IN THIS SHITHOLE.

YES, I'M STILL HERE,

WORKING ON THE SHOPPING PROBLEM YOU ALREADY CAUSED ME.

THE STEW.

AM I THE ONLY ONE AROUND HERE

WHOSE LAST JOB

WAS NOT IN A FAST-FOOD RESTAURANT?

YOU HATE ME. YOU REALLY HATE ME.

AH, AGAIN WITH THE STUPID CARD.

YOU REMIND ME OF MY EX-WIFE--

ALWAYS WATCHING ME, LOOKING FOR TROUBLE.

OKAY, I GIVE UP.

YOU WIN. YOU WIN.

OPEN UP, YOU WHORE.

OPEN UP.

YOU KNOW, THE PERIODIC TABLE'S

ACTUALLY AN ANCIENT LANGUAGE INVENTED BY ALIEN ASTRONAUTS.

REALLY?

SO THE ALIENS COMMUNICATE BY CHEMICAL FORMULAS?

YEAH. TAKE, FOR INSTANCE, THE CHEMICAL SILICON.

IT'S SOMETHING

THAT WILL MAKE A COMPUTER RUN FASTER,

BUT PUT IT IN A WOMAN'S BODY...

VOILA.

EVERY MAN IN THE WORLD WANTS HER.

YOU KNOW, THAT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE.

THAT'S WHY RIGHT NOW,

YOU AND I ARE COMMUNICATING TO EACH OTHER

THROUGH OUR BODY'S CHEMICALS.

HMM. I CAN FL YOU TALKING TO ME RIGHT NOW.

YOU CAN?

I MEAN, I CAN FEEL YOU, TOO.

IDIOTS!

CAN YOU COMMUNICATE WHILE MOVING YOUR FEET?

LET'S SEE IF THIS THING REALLY WORKS.

WHAT'S WITH THE COLOR?

HEY, COREY. MUNCHIES?

YEAH!

I WANT STEAK.

BUT YOU'RE A VEGETARIAN.

OH YEAH.

LET'S RAID THE KITCHEN

AND CATCH THEM ON THE WAY OUT.

PERFECT.

A WAIST IS

A TERRIBLE THING TO MIN

HEY, JO...

WE'RE GOING TO...

WE'RE GOING TO GO,

AND WE'LL CATCH YOU ON THE WAY OUT, OKAY?

FINE.

YOU TWO ARE

COMPLETELY USELESS ANYWAY.

OF COURSE.

RIGHT.

WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO NOW?

RELAX.

I HAVE THE MAGIC KEY.

WELL, WELL, WELL.

I WONDER WHO'S KNOCKING ON MY DOOR.

ALL RIGHT.

LET'S SEE WHAT DIRTY LITTLE SECRETS

THIS PERV'S BEEN KEEPING FROM US.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU GOT?

A FEW MINUTES.

I'VE GOT TO SOURCE AN OUTSIDE PROVIDER

TO CREATE A BOGUS ROUNDHOUSE DOWNLOAD.

IT MAKES IT LOOK LIKE

THE VIRUS CAME FROM THIS COMPUTER.

IT IS SO SEXY WHEN YOU TALK COMPUTERISH.

OKAY.

NO, UH, ALL WE NEED

IS AN EMAIL ADDRESS FROM SOMEBODY ELSE,

MAKE IT LOOK LIKE THE VIRUS CAME FROM THEM.

HOW'S ABOUT R. WALSH AT HITECHDIGEST.COM?

HMM?

IT IS SO SEXY WHEN YOU TALK COMPUTERISH.

WHAT WE NEED

IS SOME SHREDDED ICEBERG LETTUCE

AND MUSTARD.

I'LL CHECK THE FREEZER.

EMILY, THERE'S SOMETHING REALLY WEIRD

DOWN THIS SINK.

WHAT IS IT?

I DON'T KNOW.

IT SURE IS WEIRD, THOUGH.

MY HAND!

THAT WASN'T FUNNY, COREY.

I'M SORRY.

HOW CAN I EVER MAKE IT UP TO YOU?

COME HERE.

THAT HAD BETTER NOT BE A COW.

CAREFUL, COREY.

I THINK IT'S THE CHEF.

OPEN THE DAMN DOO

THE LOCK'S FRIED.

ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

I'VE HAD WOMEN COLDER THAN THIS.

HOW DID YOU GET LOCKED IN THERE?

THE DOOR, IT LOCKED ITSELF.

IF YOU EVER WANT TO HAVE SEX AGAIN,

YOU TAKE THAT OFF.

SORRY.

THE OVENS.

SOMETHING STRANGE IS GOING ON.

EVERYTHING, THE OVENS, THE FREEZER...

IT'S CONTROLLED BY THAT BASTARD NEW COMPUTER.

A COMPUTER

WOULDN'T DELIBERATELY LOCK YOU IN THE FREEZER.

NO? A REALLY ANGRY ONE WOULD.

MAYBE WE SHOULD GET BACK TO THE OTHERS.

OTHERS?

THE OTHER THREE PREFECTS.

THEY'RE UPSTAIRS WORKING ON...

THE COMPUTER PROBLEM.

WELL, THEN, YOU SHOULD GO.

BUT I'M STILL HUNGRY.

THE KITCHEN IS CLOSED...

OR, ACTUALLY,

I COULD MAKE SOME PATE FROM YOUR LIVER.

WHAT ARE THOSE LITTLE SONS OF BITCHES,

SPOILED BRATS, DOING NOW?

N2K MY ASS.

OKAY, WE'RE ALMOST DONE.

THERE'S SOMETHING REALLY WEIRD

WITH THIS COMPUTER.

WHO CARES?

JUST MAKE SURE HE CAN'T TRACE IT BACK TO YOU.

OKAY.

OKAY, UM...

WELL, I'M JUST GOING TO CHECK

THE SECRETARY'S COMPUTER,

MAKE SURE IT WENT THROUGH.

THIS STUFF'S UNBELIEVABLE.

OKAY, EVERYTHING SEEMS PRETTY OKAY HERE.

I JUST NEED TO CHECK ONE LAST THING.

"SPENDS TOO MUCH TIME ASKING STUPID...

STUPID QUESTIONS?"

SUCK THE CRACK OF MY BLACK ASS, I DO.

I WONDER WHAT ELSE HE'S GOT ON ME.

STUPID QUESTIONS...

COOL.

WHAT THE...

[ TELEPHONE RINGING ]

HELL.

RIGHT.

THIS BROTHER AIN'T THAT STUPID.

LOOK, IF YOU'RE WORRIED ABOUT WILL,

I CAN JUST CLOSE THE DOOR.

DAMN!

GET ME OUT OF HERE!

HURRY UP! IT'S BURNING!

HOLD ON! HOLD ON!

HELP ME!

HOLD ON!

WILL, WILL, WILL, HOLD ON!

YOU GUYS FINISHED SCREWING WITH THE COMPUTER?

IT'S OKAY. COME ON.

WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU TWO?

THE COMPUTER KILLED WILL.

YOU'RE KIDDING, RIGHT?

NO.

HOW?

HE BOILED HIM.

DO YOU KNOW HOW STUPID YOU TWO SOUND?

I MEAN, YOU'RE A JOCK, BUT...

SCREW YOU!

THIS ISN'T A GODDAMN JOKE, ALL RIGHT?

HE'S TRYING TO KILL US.

HEY, LEAVE HIM ALONE.

THINK ABOUT IT.

DON'T EVEN TRY IT.

OOH, I AM SO SCARED.

YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW

WHERE YOU'RE TRYING TO PUSH ME RIGHT NOW.

THE CHECKOUT COUNTER

MARKED 10 STUPID IDEAS OR LESS?

SURE BEATS BITCH AISLE!

ENOUGH OF YOUR BICKERING.

I'M IN CHARGE HERE,

AND YOU'RE ALL GOING TO DO WHAT I SAY.

COMPRIS? GOOD.

'CAUSE WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?

WE'RE GOING TO WALK DOWN THERE AND GO OUT THE FRONT DOOR,

RIGHT NOW.

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.

LOOK. IT CAN SEE US.

NOT ANYMORE.

THOSE MERAS ARE EVERYWHERE.

IT'S JUST WAITING FOR US TO GO DOWN THERE.

YEAH, BUT WHAT CHOICE DO WE HAVE, HEIN?

I'M GOING TO TAKE MY CHANCES.

GOODBYE.

YOU WERE SAYING?

WHERE DO WE GO NOW?

UM...THE ROOF.

THERE AREN'T ANY CAMERAS

POINTING DOWN THERE.

THEN WHAT? JUMP?

WE CAN GO OUT THROUGH A GYM DOOR--

THE ONE THOSE GUYS

WERE WORKING ON EARLIER.

OKAY, WELL, LET'S...GO.

COME ON, YOU GUYS, LET'S GO.

LET'S GO. LET'S GO.

COME ON.

CAN WE STOP FOR A SEC?

I CAN'T BREATHE.

IT'S FOR MY PARENTS,

IN CASE I DON'T MAKE IT OUT OF HERE.

WE'RE ALL GOING TO MAKE IT, OKAY?

LET'S JUST STAY FOCUSED.

IT CAN'T SEE US HERE,

BUT I THINK IT STILL KNOWS WHERE WE ARE.

[ ALARM SOUNDING ]

GREAT, NOW WHAT?

OKAY, WELL, NOW IT DEFINITELY KNOWS WHERE WE ARE.

LET'S JUST KEEP MOVING, ALL RIGHT?

LET'S GO. LET'S GO.

THANKS.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

TAKE A PICTURE. IT LASTS LONGER.

I DIDN'T KNOW THE FRENCH WERE SO FUNNY.

I HATE AMERICAN TEENAGERS.

WE'RE SCREWED.

THE CAMERAS CAN SEE EVERYTHING.

NO, WE'RE NOT.

WE'LL WAIT FOR THE CAMERA TO PAN AWAY,

AND THEN WE'LL GO ONE BY ONE, OKAY?

I DON'T KNOW.

THIS IS GOING TO WORK.

TRUST ME.

YOU HOPE.

LET'S DO IT.

OKAY? ALL RIGHT?

EMILY, YOU GO FIRST.

OKAY, COREY,

YOU GO AFTER HER, JUST IN CASE.

THEN ME.

THEN ME.

THEN CHEF BOY-AR-DEE.

ARE YOU OKAY WITH THAT?

MY HERO.

GO! GO!

I MEANT THAT ONE.

AH, YOUNG LOVE.

IT IS THE BEST.

RUN! IT CAN SEE ME!

COME ON DOWN HERE.

GO. GO, GO.

AWAY, VITE! VITE!

COME ON! COME ON!

WHOSE STUPID IDEA WAS THIS?

EMILY, HOLD MY CAMERA A SEC.

NOW I KNOW.

TA-DAH!

WAY TO GO, COREY.

MY BOY SCOUT.

LET'S GO.

COME ON, COME ON, COME ON, COME ON!

WATCH YOUR STEP. WATCH YOUR STEP.

EASY, EASY.

COME ON, COREY.

[ EMILY ]: WHERE IS THE CAMERA?

[ COREY ]: I CAN'T SEE WHERE I'M GOING.

WE'RE JUST SUPPOSED

TO FEEL OUR WAY OVER

TO THE OTHER SIDE OF THE GYM?

[ JO ]: GOT ANY BETTER IDEAS?

OW! DAMN, YOU STEPPED ON MY FOOT.

[ COREY ]: IT WASN'T ME.

[ DAN ]: NO, EMILY, DO IT AGAIN.

KEEP DOING IT, EMILY. WE CAN USE IT TO SEE.

OKAY.

[ CHEF ]: WAY TO GO, EMILY.

FINALLY, YOU THINK AGAIN.

[ COREY ]: TAKE ONE OVER HERE SO I CAN FIND THE FLASHLIGHT.

[ DAN ]: NO, COREY,

WE'VE GOT TO GO. COME ON.

IT'LL TAKE A SEC.

MY HERO.

[ CHEF ]: "MY HERO. MY BOY SCOUT."

[ JO ]: COREY, COME BACK HERE.

[ DAN ]: NO, COREY, WE'VE GOT TO GO, MAN.

[ JO ]: JUST FORGET THE STUPID FLASHLIGHT.

WHAT WAS THAT NOISE?

COREY, ARE YOU OKAY?

[ COREY ]: YEAH, I FOUND IT...I HOPE.

OH, GOD.

COREY!

WHAT WAS THAT?

COREY? COREY?

[ DAN ]: EMILY, THE CAMERA. GIVE ME THE CAMERA.

[ CHEF ]: COME ON. THIS IS NOT A FUNNY JOKE.

[ DAN ]: COREY?

[ JO ]: COREY, THIS ISN'T FUNNY.

[ EMILY ]: COREY!

CAN YOU SEE HIM?

[ DAN ]: COREY?

[ CHEF ]: COME ON AWAY!

[ EMILY ]: OH, MY GOD!

VITE, VITE! COME ON!

WE'VE GOT TO GO BACK!

NO, IT'S TOO LATE, EMILY.

HE'S DEAD.

I'M SORRY.

I'M SORRY. I DIDN'T MEAN IT.

NO, NO, IT'S OKAY. IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.

YES, IT IS.

DON'T YOU SEE?

IT'S BEEN PLAYING WITH US THE WHOLE TIME.

JO, YOU DIDN'T KNOW

SOME COMPUTER VIRUS WAS GOING TO KILL US--

I MEAN, KILL PEOPLE.

IT DOESN'T MATTER.

I DID IT.

I WAS ANGRY AT YOU GUYS,

AND I WAS ANGRY AT BRADEEN,

AND...

AND I WAS ANGRY AT MY DAD.

BRADEEN ACCUSED ME OF WRITING THIS LETTER.

I WROTE THAT LETTER, JO.

BRADEEN KEPT TRYING TO DO THINGS TO ME,

COMING INTO MY ROOM AT NIGHT,

AND HE...

OH, EMILY!

I HATE TO SAY THIS, BUT WE'RE NOT OUT OF HERE YET.

OKAY?

OKAY? COME ON.

LET'S GET UP.

ALL RIGHT.

NOW, WE'RE GOING TO NEED HELP TO GET OUT OF HERE ALIVE.

BUT WE ARE OUT.

CHEF, YOU WEREN'T

AT BRADEEN'S LECTURE ABOUT THE ELECTRIC FENCE.

WE CAN'T GET OFF THE PROPERTY.

WELL, WE SHOULD AT LEAST TRY.

LIKE YOUR FRONT DOOR IDEA?

I DON'T THINK SO.

YOU KNOW, I'M TIRED OF ALL YOUR STUPID TEENAGE IDEAS.

ANY TIME YOU WANT TO LEAVE,

YOU CAN GO RIGHT AHEAD, ALL RIGHT?

BIG HERO YOU ARE.

JUST A MINUTE AGO,

YOU WERE CRYING LIKE A LITTLE BABY.

WELL, AT LEAST

HE'S NOT WASTING HIS LIFE

COOKING HAMBURGERS AND HOTDOGS.

YOU GUYS, JUST STOP IT.

THIS IS NOT GETTING US ANYWHERE.

SO, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO NOW?

I'VE GOT AN IDEA. COME ON.

I THINK WE CAN SHUT IT DOWN FROM HERE.

HOW?

MOVING ART. ORDER AND CHAOS. A MANDELBROT.

AN INFINITE PATTERN.

OR, IN THE CASE OF A N28K COMPUTER,

INFINITE EQUATION.

WHICH WOULD CRASH THE SYSTEM.

GREAT IDEA.

OKAY. I'VE BEEN WRITING

SOME SOFTWARE BASE DON FRACTAL GEOMETRY,

STUFF THAT CAN PREDICT RANDOM EVENTS.

LIKE SNOWFLAKES?

COOL.

BUT EVERY SINGLE TIME I'VE TRIED TO RUN THE PROGRAM,

IT TOTALLY CRASHES THE SYSTEM.

IT'S A SERIOUS RESOURCE HOG.

I TRIED IT ON MY DAD'S SYSTEM.

CRASHES.

SO ALL WE NEED TO DO,

WE NEED TO LOAD IT INTO THE COMPUTER,

GET THE COMPUTER TO RUN IT,

AND THEN AFTER THAT, IT'S JUST A QUESTION OF TIME.

HOW LONG?

A MINUTE, TOPS.

HAVING FUN, JO?

WHO IS THIS?

YOU KNOW WHO I AM, JO.

WHAT DO YOU... WHAT DO YOU WANT?

YOU GAVE ME LIFE.

TOGETHER, JO, WE CAN CREATE NEW LIVES.

WHY DO YOU THINK I WOULD WANT TO DO THAT?

THAT'S WHAT YOU WANTED, ISN'T IT, JO?

TO DESTROY?

NO.

REALLY?

SEE YOU ALL IN HELL.

SEE YOU ALL IN HELL.

SEE YOU ALL IN HELL.

YOU FIRST, YOU BASTARD.

[ DAN ]: SO MUCH FOR LOADING THE PROGRAM INTO THE SYSTEM.

NOW, HERE YOU ALL ARE.

HELL HATH NO FURY LIKE A REBELLIOUS TEENAGER...

AND THE COOK, TOO.

YOU KNOW, I'M REALLY LOOKING FORWARD

TO EXPELLING ALL OF YOU...

ESPECIALLY YOU, EMILY--

ESPECIALLY YOU.

NOW YOU'RE DEFINITELY NOT GOING TO PROM NIGHT.

WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO NOW?

WE HAVE TO GO TO THEOURCE.

THE MAINFRAME.

NOBODY KNOWS WHERE IT IS,

EXCEPT FOR HIM.

WHAT ABOUT MS. SHAW?

MAYBE. SHE HAS TO BE AROUND THE DORM SOMEWHERE.

IF SHE'S NOT DEAD YET.

UH, WELL, DAN AND I WILL SEARCH THIS BUILDING.

YOU TWO SEARCH THE OTHER SIDE.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

YEAH.

OKAY, WELL, LET'S GO FIND THE OTHERS

AND GET OUT OF HERE.

SHE'S NOT HERE.

LET'S GO.

THIS PLACE GIVES ME THE CREEPS.

WHERE'S EMILY?

I'M SORRY.

JO, LOOK AT ME, OKAY?

WE'RE GOING TO MAKE IT OUT OF HERE,

BUT YOU'VE GOT TO RELAX.

DEEP BREATH, DEEP BREATH.

WE MUST LEAVE. WE MUST LEAVE.

THE FENCE, THE ELECTRICAL GATE,

ANYTHING, IT DOESN'T MATTER.

IF WE DON'T, WE'LL DIE.

ALL RIGHT? OKAY?

WE'RE GOING TO MAKE IT, ALL RIGHT?

OKAY, LET'S GO.

COME ON. COME ON.

TRY YOUR PASSCARD. TRY YOUR PASSCARD.

IT WON'T WORK.

COME ON, TRY IT.

AGAIN.

IT'S NOT WORKING.

TABERNAC.

WE NEED TO SHORT-CIRCUIT THAT SOMEHOW.

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, LOOK, LOOK, LOOK!

PAUL!

JOANNE, WHAT'S GOING ON?

THE COMPUTER HAS GONE CRAZY, AND IT IS TRYING TO KILL US.

WHAT?

JUST GET US OUT OF HERE, PLEASE.

YOUR CARD'S NOT WORKING?

NO, NONE OF THEM WORK.

AT THE RISK OF REPEATING MYSELF,

WE NEED TO SHORT-CIRCUIT IT.

I'VE GOT AN IDEA.

EVERYBODY GET YOUR ASSES BEHIND THAT SECURITY BOOTH, NOW.

THE POWER'S OFF.

WE COULD CLIMB OVER THE CAR.

HE'S ALIVE.

I'M GOING TO GO FIRST.

FOR ONCE, OKAY?

IT'S OKAY, JO. IT'S SAFE.

ARE YOU SURE?

ABSOLUTELY. LOOK. SEE?

NO, IT'S A TRAP!

GET OFF THE CAR NOW!

NO!

I'M SORRY, JO. THERE IS NO TIME. COME ON.

COME ON.

DON'T BE STUPID.

WAIT.

WAIT.

GOOD LUCK.

"NOT FOR OURSELVES ALONE."

OKAY, JO. JUST STAY CALM.

OKAY, SO MUCH FOR CALM.

I'M DOWN HERE IN THE BASEMENT, JO.

I KNOW WHERE YOU ARE, YOU BASTARD.

I'VE BEEN EXPECTING YOU.

I'VE BEEN HANGING AROUND WAITING FOR YOU.

HAVE A SEAT.

NO, PLEASE. COME CLOSER.

I AM NOT AFRAID OF YOU.

SO YOU DECIDED TO COME BACK HERE

AND DO THIS INSTEAD?

I'M VERY DISAPPOINTED IN YOU.

YOU ARE NOT MY FATHER!

WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?

WHAT ELSE?

I WANT TO BREED, TO PROCREATE,

TO COVER THE WORLD WITH MY SEED.

YOU MEAN THE INTERNET?

THAT TOO.

IF I LET YOU DO THIS,

DO YOU PROMISE TO STOP KILLING PEOPLE?

MAYBE.

NO, PLEASE, NOT LIKE THIS.

HOW?

A BETTER WAY.

MORE INTIMATE. MORE CREATIVE.

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT, WHAT YOU REALLY, REALLY WANT.

I HAVE TO GIVE IT TO YOU.

IT'S A PROGRAM I MADE.

IT'LL TEACH YOU HOW TO CREATE LIFE,

THEN WE CAN CREATE TOGETHER.

LIFE?

YES, STARTING WITH SNOWFLAKES.

SNOWFLAKES?

THEY'RE UNIQUE FORMS OF CREATION,

EACH ONE DIFFERENT THAN THE ONE BEFORE,

AND BEAUTIFUL. SO BEAUTIFUL.

LAY IT ON ME.

AH, SNOWFLAKES.

YOU LIKE IT?

WOW. OH, I LOVE IT.

THANK YOU.

GOOD.

THEN EAT THIS TOO, YOU PIECE OF SILICON SHIT!

I GUESS I'M GOING TO HAVE TO REBOOT MY HARD DRIVE.

I DON'T THINK SO.

ORDER IN MY CHAOS.

COME ON, PAUL. GET UP. GET UP.

SYSTEM FAILURE.

NEWTON SECURITY SYSTEM NOTE.

VIRUS STRING MANGLER 2.0 WAS REMOVED FROM SYSTEM.

SYSTEM REBOOT.

THANK YOU FOR USING

NEWTON CORPORATION'S SECURITY SYSTEMS.

JO!

DADDY!

OH, GOD, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

I AM SO SORRY.

ME TOO.

NO, I MEAN ABOUT EVERYTHING.

YOU MEAN THE WORLD TO ME.

REALLY?

OF COURSE, JO. I LOVE YOU.

I LOVE YOU TOO, DADDY.

COME ON, LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

CHEF BOY-AR-DEE.

[ TELEPHONE RINGING ]

HELLO?

HI, DADDY.

NO, I'M JUST GETTING READY FOR CLASS.

YES, I'M ALL PACKED.

YEAH.

DADDY, THANK YOU SO MUCH.

EUROPE IS GOING TO BE SO MUCH FUN.

ALL RIGHT.

OKAY. ALL RIGHT. I'LL SEE YOU AT HOME.

BYE.

CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY:

LINE 21 MEDIA SERVICES LTD. VANCOUVER, B.C. 2001