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English (HI) Subtitles.
Workaholics S04E09 (720p) Best Buds - BrRip [KoTuWa]
1
00:00:01,240 --> 00:00:03,626
- Here, the cubs
from a local pride of lions...
2
00:00:03,712 --> 00:00:05,171
- Oh, my God!
- Dude, what?
3
00:00:05,297 --> 00:00:07,757
- I just realized
that tomorrow's Wednesday,
4
00:00:07,883 --> 00:00:09,801
and Karl's gonna
bring our brick o' bud.
5
00:00:09,927 --> 00:00:11,719
- Oh, and he's excited.
That's cute.
6
00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:13,471
- Oh, that's really cute, Adam.
- [laughs]
7
00:00:13,597 --> 00:00:14,847
- Hey, guess what, guys.
8
00:00:14,973 --> 00:00:17,517
My cuteness has nothing
to do with this.
9
00:00:17,643 --> 00:00:19,560
Thanks for thinking
I'm cute, though,
10
00:00:19,687 --> 00:00:21,604
but it has nothing to do with
this, 'cause what I'm saying is,
11
00:00:21,730 --> 00:00:23,898
we didn't even smoke
this week's weed!
12
00:00:24,024 --> 00:00:25,149
- Whoa.
13
00:00:25,275 --> 00:00:26,651
- I pride myself
on being a real pothead.
14
00:00:26,777 --> 00:00:28,361
We've never gone a week
without killing a brick,
15
00:00:28,487 --> 00:00:29,862
so let's smoke
all of it tonight!
16
00:00:29,988 --> 00:00:31,280
- You want to smoke
all that tonight?
17
00:00:31,407 --> 00:00:34,200
- Yeah, man.
- No, dude. He's right.
18
00:00:34,326 --> 00:00:37,578
We should smoke like
no pothead's ever smoked before.
19
00:00:37,705 --> 00:00:38,788
- How?
20
00:00:38,914 --> 00:00:40,623
- We should have...
21
00:00:40,749 --> 00:00:42,500
a bong fire.
22
00:00:42,626 --> 00:00:44,877
- Yeah!
- All right.
23
00:00:45,003 --> 00:00:46,504
- What does that mean exactly?
24
00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:48,297
We're gonna burn
all of our weed in a bonfire?
25
00:00:48,424 --> 00:00:50,341
'Cause I think
that might be wasteful.
26
00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:53,469
- Mm...
27
00:00:55,556 --> 00:00:56,556
- Oh, yeah.
- That's cool.
28
00:00:56,682 --> 00:00:57,974
- All right.
- All right.
29
00:00:58,100 --> 00:01:00,351
Release the carb!
[all grunt]
30
00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:07,900
- Oh-ho-ho!
- Whoo!
31
00:01:08,026 --> 00:01:10,445
all: Oh!
- [coughing]
32
00:01:18,245 --> 00:01:20,913
- Worth doing it.
33
00:01:21,039 --> 00:01:23,875
[beatboxing]
34
00:01:24,001 --> 00:01:25,001
♪ ♪
35
00:01:25,127 --> 00:01:27,587
- ♪ I'm fresh ♪
36
00:01:27,713 --> 00:01:29,756
- ♪ You gotta, you gotta,
you gotta, gotta ♪
37
00:01:29,882 --> 00:01:32,049
- ♪ Gotta be fresh ♪
38
00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:35,762
[doorbell rings]
39
00:01:37,765 --> 00:01:39,474
- Finally!
- Karl, where's the weed?
40
00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:43,227
- Bad news, guys...
She's dead.
41
00:01:43,353 --> 00:01:44,520
- What?
- She's dead.
42
00:01:44,646 --> 00:01:46,439
- Who?
- My life as a weed dealer.
43
00:01:46,565 --> 00:01:48,191
All these pharmacies
have been popping up,
44
00:01:48,317 --> 00:01:50,735
raping and murdering me
left and right.
45
00:01:50,861 --> 00:01:52,904
Freakin' Prop 8.
- Yeah. Where's the weed?
46
00:01:53,030 --> 00:01:54,697
- Yeah.
- The weed...
47
00:01:54,823 --> 00:01:56,866
is at my new weed pharmacy!
48
00:01:56,992 --> 00:01:58,075
- [laughs]
- What?
49
00:01:58,202 --> 00:01:59,535
- I'm off the streets,
50
00:01:59,661 --> 00:02:00,661
and I'm operating
out of a burrito stand.
51
00:02:00,788 --> 00:02:02,163
- Burritos and weed?
52
00:02:02,289 --> 00:02:04,081
That'd be, like,
the most amazing job ever.
53
00:02:04,208 --> 00:02:06,959
- And the human genius
is back in the building.
54
00:02:07,085 --> 00:02:08,336
- Wait a second.
And it's all legal?
55
00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:10,004
- Yeah, I mean,
as soon as I figure out
56
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:11,506
how to fill out
these eight forms.
57
00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:13,049
- Jeez, Louise.
58
00:02:13,175 --> 00:02:14,425
You know, I always wanted
to own my own business,
59
00:02:14,551 --> 00:02:16,219
just never had the nuts
to take the risk.
60
00:02:16,345 --> 00:02:18,221
- I also took the liberty of
having a doctor friend of mine
61
00:02:18,347 --> 00:02:20,264
write you guys
weed prescriptions,
62
00:02:20,390 --> 00:02:21,974
so now you're legal.
- Cool!
63
00:02:22,100 --> 00:02:24,894
- So, Blake, you've got
trouble sleeping, my man.
64
00:02:25,020 --> 00:02:26,229
- Uh...
- Wuh-oh.
65
00:02:26,355 --> 00:02:27,438
- That's not true.
- It is now.
66
00:02:27,564 --> 00:02:29,816
And, Ders,
you got migraines.
67
00:02:29,942 --> 00:02:31,067
- Hey, if you say so.
68
00:02:31,193 --> 00:02:32,735
- And, Adam, you've got AIDS.
69
00:02:32,861 --> 00:02:34,111
- I got AIDS!
[laughter]
70
00:02:34,238 --> 00:02:36,113
Deadliest one!
I'm giving you AIDS!
71
00:02:36,240 --> 00:02:37,532
AIDS tickles. AIDS tickles.
- Aah!
72
00:02:37,658 --> 00:02:38,908
Don't, you creep.
73
00:02:39,034 --> 00:02:40,743
- Oh, man. I don't have AIDS,
though, right?
74
00:02:40,869 --> 00:02:42,203
- No.
75
00:02:42,329 --> 00:02:44,163
- Legal weed's
gonna be pretty cool.
76
00:02:44,289 --> 00:02:45,373
- [laughs]
- [coughs]
77
00:02:45,499 --> 00:02:48,543
- Ho!
Ooh, mama.
78
00:02:48,669 --> 00:02:52,004
Legal weed is awesome.
Mm.
79
00:02:52,130 --> 00:02:55,800
- Have you three
lost your minds?
80
00:02:55,926 --> 00:02:58,261
- Buh-bam! [laughs]
- Whoa.
81
00:02:58,387 --> 00:03:00,221
- It's our legal right
to smoke weed on the job,
82
00:03:00,347 --> 00:03:02,306
'cause, uh, I get migraines.
83
00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:05,560
- I have... what do I...
I have trouble swee...
84
00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:07,103
I have trouble sweeping.
85
00:03:07,229 --> 00:03:09,564
- And I have AIDS.
Heard of it?
86
00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:12,149
- Okay, just because you have
a doctor's permission
87
00:03:12,276 --> 00:03:13,568
to smoke marijuana
88
00:03:13,694 --> 00:03:15,903
does not mean you can do it
on the job.
89
00:03:16,029 --> 00:03:17,446
Put those out now!
90
00:03:17,573 --> 00:03:19,240
- This job is dumb.
This is stupid.
91
00:03:19,366 --> 00:03:21,617
You can smoke at, like, a ton
of other jobs in California.
92
00:03:21,743 --> 00:03:23,536
- No, you can't.
- Yeah, you can.
93
00:03:23,662 --> 00:03:25,079
Our garbage man smokes weed.
94
00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:26,414
- Yep.
- That's true.
95
00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:28,165
- At Karl's job,
you can smoke weed.
96
00:03:28,292 --> 00:03:30,293
- We should just quit this dumb
job and work for Karl, man.
97
00:03:30,419 --> 00:03:32,044
- Yeah, that's, like,
a great idea.
98
00:03:32,170 --> 00:03:34,171
We could, like, eat burritos
all day, smoke weed all day.
99
00:03:34,298 --> 00:03:36,215
That's, like, my two favorite
things... that and masturbating.
100
00:03:36,341 --> 00:03:37,675
If I could do that at a job,
101
00:03:37,801 --> 00:03:39,218
we could also maybe get a job
at a sperm bank.
102
00:03:39,344 --> 00:03:41,762
- You do masturbate here.
I know.
103
00:03:41,889 --> 00:03:43,014
We both do.
104
00:03:43,140 --> 00:03:44,307
- I've never jacked off here.
105
00:03:44,433 --> 00:03:45,933
- Oh, my God,
what is happening?
106
00:03:46,059 --> 00:03:47,310
- Alice, baby,
here's the deal.
107
00:03:47,436 --> 00:03:49,020
I guess what we're saying is,
108
00:03:49,146 --> 00:03:52,148
you either let us smoke weed,
which it's our right to do...
109
00:03:52,274 --> 00:03:54,400
- Legally.
- Or it's bye-bye, TelAmeriCorp.
110
00:03:54,526 --> 00:03:55,526
We're out the door.
111
00:03:55,652 --> 00:03:58,195
- Good-bye. Bye-bye.
- Okay?
112
00:03:58,322 --> 00:04:00,781
- Work here or don't, 'cause
it's no sweat off my balls.
113
00:04:00,908 --> 00:04:02,450
- [laughs]
Okay. Okay.
114
00:04:02,576 --> 00:04:05,620
You don't think we'll quit?
115
00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:08,456
Say we won't.
- You won't.
116
00:04:12,461 --> 00:04:15,880
- [howls]
Air raid, bitches!
117
00:04:16,006 --> 00:04:17,715
We're about to drop
a bomb on you!
118
00:04:17,841 --> 00:04:20,134
- That's right, losers.
The day's finally come.
119
00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:21,719
We out this muh.
120
00:04:21,845 --> 00:04:26,349
- So if you want to have Alice
fry your brains
121
00:04:26,475 --> 00:04:29,477
into Velveeta cheese,
go ahead,
122
00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:32,605
but we've got dreams
of the American kind.
123
00:04:32,731 --> 00:04:35,608
- You guys stay here, you might
as well join the Taliban.
124
00:04:35,734 --> 00:04:38,986
- So see you around,
Taliban bitches!
125
00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:42,865
- [giggles]
- Peace.
126
00:04:42,991 --> 00:04:45,493
- If Alice tells you
that you can't smoke in here,
127
00:04:45,619 --> 00:04:47,828
she's lying.
128
00:04:47,955 --> 00:04:49,997
Know your rights.
129
00:04:51,959 --> 00:04:52,959
Homey.
130
00:04:53,085 --> 00:04:54,293
- Idiots.
131
00:04:54,419 --> 00:04:56,921
- Holy hell, man.
132
00:04:57,047 --> 00:04:58,297
- What'd you pay for this?
133
00:04:58,423 --> 00:04:59,924
- Oh, no, man,
squatters' rights...
134
00:05:00,050 --> 00:05:01,717
I've been living here
for three months,
135
00:05:01,843 --> 00:05:03,636
so it's legally mine.
- There's a lot of good traffic.
136
00:05:03,762 --> 00:05:06,472
People will see it.
And gnarly roadkill too.
137
00:05:06,598 --> 00:05:08,224
It's like a Cannibal Corpse
album cover.
138
00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:09,475
- Ew.
- Look at this.
139
00:05:09,601 --> 00:05:12,019
- All right, so, uh,
Adam, Blake,
140
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:13,562
will you please clean that up
141
00:05:13,689 --> 00:05:15,439
and then hit the kitchen,
start cooking?
142
00:05:15,565 --> 00:05:16,983
- [laughs]
- We're gonna clean it up?
143
00:05:17,109 --> 00:05:18,275
- Wait, hold... hold on.
Hold on a minute.
144
00:05:18,402 --> 00:05:19,902
You're not the boss here, bro.
145
00:05:20,028 --> 00:05:21,862
This place is mine.
- That's right.
146
00:05:21,989 --> 00:05:24,240
- Karl, I have
business expertise, okay?
147
00:05:24,366 --> 00:05:26,534
Those eight forms you got
hanging over your head...
148
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:28,202
As co-owner,
I'll fill 'em out.
149
00:05:28,328 --> 00:05:29,912
Hell, I'll fill out nine.
- Oh, sound good, man.
150
00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:31,163
- This is what I do.
- Perfect.
151
00:05:31,289 --> 00:05:32,540
Right on, dude.
- This is what I do.
152
00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:33,666
- Good deal.
All right, welcome aboard.
153
00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:34,875
- Wow.
- Nice.
154
00:05:35,002 --> 00:05:36,293
- Okay.
- Hey, uh, dudes,
155
00:05:36,420 --> 00:05:37,670
why don't you strap on
some hairnets,
156
00:05:37,796 --> 00:05:39,672
uh, hit the back,
grill some carne asada,
157
00:05:39,798 --> 00:05:40,840
smoke some weed?
158
00:05:40,966 --> 00:05:42,591
- Smoking weed...
now we're talking.
159
00:05:42,718 --> 00:05:44,385
- And then it's roadkill duty.
160
00:05:44,511 --> 00:05:45,886
- Hey, man,
that sounds freakin' cool
161
00:05:46,013 --> 00:05:48,055
because you said the weed stuff
and carne asada.
162
00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:49,181
I love those things.
163
00:05:49,307 --> 00:05:50,307
- Those are
two of my favorite things.
164
00:05:50,434 --> 00:05:51,434
- Since you guys are,
like, co-owners and stuff,
165
00:05:51,560 --> 00:05:53,310
I kind of wanted to run
something by you...
166
00:05:53,437 --> 00:05:54,895
- Okay.
- And let me know
167
00:05:55,022 --> 00:05:56,731
if I can be co-owner
with this idea.
168
00:05:56,857 --> 00:05:59,692
Weed and burritos... you put
the weed in the burritos.
169
00:05:59,818 --> 00:06:00,985
We call 'em "burweedos."
170
00:06:01,111 --> 00:06:02,236
what do you think?
- Burweedo!
171
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:03,946
I knew you had a name.
172
00:06:04,072 --> 00:06:06,240
- All right, all right.
- Not co-owner, but that's good.
173
00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:08,617
- All right. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. Let's do this.
174
00:06:08,744 --> 00:06:10,286
- Boom.
- Come on, buds.
175
00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:11,662
[laughter]
- Best buds!
176
00:06:11,788 --> 00:06:13,372
- Best buds!
- Come on!
177
00:06:13,498 --> 00:06:14,832
- Whoo!
- Whoo!
178
00:06:14,958 --> 00:06:16,792
- Ow, ow!
- Move your arm.
179
00:06:16,918 --> 00:06:18,294
[beatboxing]
180
00:06:18,420 --> 00:06:19,962
- ♪ You gotta ♪
- ♪ Gotta be fresh ♪
181
00:06:23,091 --> 00:06:24,759
- Whoo!
Number one customer!
182
00:06:24,885 --> 00:06:26,218
Right here, front and center.
183
00:06:26,344 --> 00:06:27,511
God, I wish we had,
like, a bell to ring.
184
00:06:27,637 --> 00:06:29,055
- Yeah.
- Ding-ding-ding-ding, you know?
185
00:06:29,181 --> 00:06:30,681
- Oh, dude.
- We're just excited about...
186
00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:32,808
Stop it, dude.
What are you doing?
187
00:06:32,934 --> 00:06:34,602
I said a bell.
- I-I'll get one.
188
00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:36,353
- What's up, man?
189
00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:38,606
- What's up is, I'd like
to have a large root beer,
190
00:06:38,732 --> 00:06:40,775
some chips and guac,
and, um...
191
00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:42,693
let me try
one of those burweedos,
192
00:06:42,819 --> 00:06:43,861
if you know what I mean.
193
00:06:43,987 --> 00:06:45,571
- Oh, I know what you mean.
194
00:06:45,697 --> 00:06:49,325
One chips and guac
and one burweedo!
195
00:06:49,451 --> 00:06:51,744
Hey, Karl, can we get my man
a root beer, please?
196
00:06:51,870 --> 00:06:53,704
- One root beer
coming right up, man.
197
00:06:53,830 --> 00:06:57,083
- I don't have change,
but I will, so just step aside.
198
00:06:57,209 --> 00:06:59,168
- Dude...
- Number two!
199
00:06:59,294 --> 00:07:00,878
What you want to do?
200
00:07:01,004 --> 00:07:03,464
- We need
six of those burweedos stat,
201
00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:05,549
and extra weedo,
if that's a thing.
202
00:07:05,675 --> 00:07:08,260
- Six burweedos
with extra weedo.
203
00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:10,805
Okay... oh, great. Actually,
you can just give that to him,
204
00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:12,431
and we're cool?
- Cool.
205
00:07:12,557 --> 00:07:15,351
- Here we go...
One root beer for you,
206
00:07:15,477 --> 00:07:17,478
and I'm gonna go ahead
and check on that order for you,
207
00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:19,730
make sure it's being made
with the best buds.
208
00:07:19,856 --> 00:07:22,483
- Come on, little chicken,
do the chicken dance.
209
00:07:22,609 --> 00:07:25,277
I'm a little chicken.
Do the chicken dance.
210
00:07:25,403 --> 00:07:26,570
- Check this out.
211
00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:28,697
Take me to your dealer.
212
00:07:28,824 --> 00:07:31,033
- Like, what does that mean?
- I saw it on a bumper sticker.
213
00:07:31,159 --> 00:07:33,536
- [laughs] Hey, dudes,
how we doing with the burr...
214
00:07:33,662 --> 00:07:35,162
- What bumper sticker am I?
215
00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:38,165
- I'm telling on you.
Hey, Ders?
216
00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:39,291
Ders.
- What are you doing, man?
217
00:07:39,417 --> 00:07:41,001
- You got to see this.
- Just a second.
218
00:07:41,128 --> 00:07:42,378
What? Heads up.
- Get in here!
219
00:07:42,504 --> 00:07:44,130
- Heads up.
- What a freakin' bitch.
220
00:07:44,256 --> 00:07:45,923
- Look at these slackers.
- Don't be a bitch, dude.
221
00:07:46,049 --> 00:07:47,967
- Karl, you want to handle this?
- I'd love to.
222
00:07:48,093 --> 00:07:50,719
Guys, we got paying customers
out there, okay?
223
00:07:50,846 --> 00:07:53,222
They can spend their
hard-earned cash on anything!
224
00:07:53,348 --> 00:07:55,266
They could buy candy.
They could buy cookies.
225
00:07:55,392 --> 00:07:56,642
They could buy Band-Aids.
226
00:07:56,768 --> 00:07:58,102
- Ice creams?
- Yeah.
227
00:07:58,228 --> 00:08:00,187
- Ring Pops?
- Yeah, Ring Pops, for sure.
228
00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:02,439
- Popcorns?
- Duster? Like a jacket?
229
00:08:02,566 --> 00:08:05,109
- They could go... they could buy
a duster jacket or the car.
230
00:08:05,235 --> 00:08:06,777
- Fun Dip candy?
- That's the point!
231
00:08:06,903 --> 00:08:08,154
They could buy anything,
232
00:08:08,280 --> 00:08:09,697
and what they want
to spend their money on
233
00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:11,323
is our burweedos!
234
00:08:11,449 --> 00:08:13,200
And you guys are back here
just chiefing the kind?
235
00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:15,202
- We blowing 'dro, bro.
- Okay.
236
00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:16,954
- That's not funny.
- Not no mo', nuh-uh.
237
00:08:17,080 --> 00:08:18,497
Hey, not anymore.
238
00:08:18,623 --> 00:08:19,748
Guess what.
- What are you doing, man?
239
00:08:19,875 --> 00:08:20,875
- Weed...
- What are you doing?
240
00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:22,626
- Is coming up front with us.
241
00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:23,752
- That's right.
- No! What are you doing?
242
00:08:23,879 --> 00:08:24,879
- Give me that joint.
You don't deserve it.
243
00:08:25,005 --> 00:08:26,005
- Hey!
- Excuse me.
244
00:08:26,131 --> 00:08:27,756
Excuse me!
- That is uncalled for.
245
00:08:27,883 --> 00:08:30,426
- We pay you to cook food, okay?
Not bake your brain.
246
00:08:30,552 --> 00:08:31,677
- We have a food critic
coming tomorrow.
247
00:08:31,803 --> 00:08:33,137
- Yes.
- Okay?
248
00:08:33,263 --> 00:08:34,305
And we need you guys
to be 'rito pros,
249
00:08:34,431 --> 00:08:36,682
so please get to the orders.
250
00:08:36,808 --> 00:08:37,933
Chop-chop!
- Chop-chop. [claps]
251
00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:39,476
- No one tells me
to chop-chop.
252
00:08:39,603 --> 00:08:41,103
- Thank you.
- You guys are great.
253
00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:42,730
You're good at your jobs.
254
00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:44,023
- Okay, that's it.
What do we have to make...
255
00:08:44,149 --> 00:08:46,108
Like, six burweedos
or something?
256
00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:47,610
- Something to that effect.
257
00:08:47,736 --> 00:08:49,361
- How do you even
make these things? Stupid.
258
00:08:49,487 --> 00:08:52,031
- Ders and Karl... they think they
just know everything, right?
259
00:08:52,157 --> 00:08:54,575
Well, they don't.
They don't know karate.
260
00:08:54,701 --> 00:08:55,784
That's one thing,
and that's just one thing
261
00:08:55,911 --> 00:08:56,911
off the top of my head.
- Yeah.
262
00:08:57,037 --> 00:08:58,746
- I'm a man of the people.
I know what people want.
263
00:08:58,872 --> 00:08:59,872
I know what chicks want...
264
00:08:59,998 --> 00:09:01,373
a tongue,
a lot of tongue action.
265
00:09:01,499 --> 00:09:03,626
[gasps]
Oh, my God.
266
00:09:03,752 --> 00:09:05,419
I know what people want.
267
00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:07,171
- How do you even
fold these things, man?
268
00:09:07,297 --> 00:09:09,215
- Blake, I have an idea.
- I swear to God, dude.
269
00:09:09,341 --> 00:09:11,425
Those chicks at Chipotle...
They're, like, warlocks
270
00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:12,593
walking amongst us.
271
00:09:12,719 --> 00:09:13,844
- Blake.
- Huh?
272
00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:15,721
- I have an idea.
- What?
273
00:09:15,847 --> 00:09:17,640
- Well, I forget now,
because you took too long
274
00:09:17,766 --> 00:09:19,475
to ask me what my idea was.
275
00:09:19,601 --> 00:09:20,601
- It's the weed, man.
- It was the weed.
276
00:09:20,727 --> 00:09:22,478
- They say it...
- It affected...
277
00:09:22,604 --> 00:09:24,772
[both laugh]
Cheese.
278
00:09:24,898 --> 00:09:25,898
- What?
- That was it.
279
00:09:26,024 --> 00:09:27,316
Get all the cheese.
280
00:09:27,442 --> 00:09:28,651
- Ooh, all the cheese?
- All the cheese.
281
00:09:28,777 --> 00:09:30,236
- Oh, I already like
this idea, dude.
282
00:09:30,362 --> 00:09:31,403
- Boop!
- Bap!
283
00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:32,738
- The number two's more...
284
00:09:32,864 --> 00:09:33,864
Well, number one comes
with one chip,
285
00:09:33,990 --> 00:09:35,366
so it is different, actually.
286
00:09:35,492 --> 00:09:37,034
- Yo, so I don't mean
to be a dick, bro,
287
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:39,203
but, dang, what's up
with that weedo, man?
288
00:09:39,329 --> 00:09:42,248
- Yes, sorry. Um, I'll be
right back with your food.
289
00:09:42,374 --> 00:09:44,375
Okay? Sorry.
- Yeah, we'll handle this.
290
00:09:44,501 --> 00:09:46,794
- Come on, boy, you got this!
Get 'em! Get 'em!
291
00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:47,920
- What the hell is this?
292
00:09:48,046 --> 00:09:52,549
- Oh, check it out, man.
293
00:09:52,676 --> 00:09:55,219
It's Shaquille Burrit-O'Neal!
294
00:09:55,345 --> 00:09:56,637
What do you think?
295
00:09:56,763 --> 00:09:58,472
- It's the world's
largest burrito.
296
00:09:58,598 --> 00:09:59,974
We were gonna save it
for the customer,
297
00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:01,767
but then we were like,
"That's crazy.
298
00:10:01,893 --> 00:10:02,893
Why don't we just..."
299
00:10:03,019 --> 00:10:04,603
- Set two world records.
- Yep.
300
00:10:04,729 --> 00:10:07,523
- Making and eating
the world's largest burweedo.
301
00:10:07,649 --> 00:10:10,276
The American dream just keeps
getting more, like, American-er!
302
00:10:10,402 --> 00:10:11,735
- Hey!
Shaquille Burrit-O'Neal
303
00:10:11,861 --> 00:10:14,405
sounds
really freakin' cool, okay?
304
00:10:14,531 --> 00:10:16,699
But we got ten hungry people
out there
305
00:10:16,825 --> 00:10:18,242
waiting for their burweedos,
306
00:10:18,368 --> 00:10:19,994
and that's really
not freakin' cool.
307
00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:22,121
- Mm, how about you chill
with the tone, Loc?
308
00:10:22,247 --> 00:10:23,497
- Okay, you guys
are off kitchen duty.
309
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:25,124
That's a fact.
310
00:10:25,250 --> 00:10:26,583
- You know what I got
for you, boys? Check it out.
311
00:10:26,710 --> 00:10:28,252
Found it in the Karl space
this morning.
312
00:10:28,378 --> 00:10:29,586
- Yeah. Yeah.
313
00:10:29,713 --> 00:10:31,338
- Street duty.
314
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:34,174
- Oh, you think I'm afraid
of a little mascot action?
315
00:10:34,301 --> 00:10:38,137
Been there, dumb that.
316
00:10:38,263 --> 00:10:40,139
- This is bullcrap, man.
- How old is he?
317
00:10:40,265 --> 00:10:42,099
- I don't know.
- Are you kidding me?
318
00:10:42,225 --> 00:10:43,267
We're not wearing
this thing, man.
319
00:10:43,393 --> 00:10:44,560
Are you frickin' crazy?
320
00:10:44,686 --> 00:10:46,520
It's, like, 100 degrees
out there.
321
00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:48,230
This thing's like a hot box.
322
00:10:48,356 --> 00:10:49,648
- Bees, please.
323
00:10:49,774 --> 00:10:50,816
Keep it 'drated.
324
00:10:50,942 --> 00:10:52,359
You'll be fine.
- Mm-hmm.
325
00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:54,028
- We're out of here, man.
Back to work!
326
00:10:54,154 --> 00:10:56,238
- You're welcome
for the waters.
327
00:10:56,364 --> 00:10:57,364
- There you go!
328
00:10:57,490 --> 00:10:58,741
- Come get a burrito!
- Yeah.
329
00:10:58,867 --> 00:11:00,409
Good.
Good mascot voice.
330
00:11:00,535 --> 00:11:02,703
- It's so frickin' hot
in here, dude.
331
00:11:02,829 --> 00:11:04,747
The walls... they're closing in
on me, man.
332
00:11:04,873 --> 00:11:06,332
- I'll get you.
Here, you gotta reach...
333
00:11:06,458 --> 00:11:08,876
- Get me out!
- I'm trying to... there we go.
334
00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:10,210
- [breathes heavily]
- There you go.
335
00:11:10,337 --> 00:11:13,172
[coughs]
- What the hell, DeMamp?
336
00:11:13,298 --> 00:11:15,632
Why'd you cave?
- Oh, I don't cave.
337
00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:17,384
I blaze.
338
00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:18,886
- What are you
talking about, man?
339
00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:20,095
- It's weed. It's blaze.
I blaze weed.
340
00:11:20,221 --> 00:11:21,472
- No, I know what it is,
man...
341
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:22,598
- There you go.
- But we can't smoke these.
342
00:11:22,724 --> 00:11:23,724
They'll see us.
343
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:25,059
- No, I got the idea
from you, dude.
344
00:11:25,185 --> 00:11:27,227
Earlier when you said
"hot box the suit,"
345
00:11:27,354 --> 00:11:29,521
I was like,
"Let's smoke weed in the suits!"
346
00:11:29,647 --> 00:11:30,856
- Oh.
- Right?
347
00:11:30,982 --> 00:11:33,525
If you smoke weed
in the burrito,
348
00:11:33,651 --> 00:11:36,320
they'll never know.
- [laughs]
349
00:11:36,446 --> 00:11:37,863
- Did I look cool
when I just said that?
350
00:11:37,989 --> 00:11:40,032
- No, man.
We look really stupid.
351
00:11:40,158 --> 00:11:46,205
[beatboxing]
352
00:11:46,331 --> 00:11:48,248
- ♪ We're like ♪
- ♪ Fresh, fresh, fresh ♪
353
00:11:48,375 --> 00:11:50,250
- Best Bud burweedo!
- [coughs]
354
00:11:50,377 --> 00:11:53,962
- Whoo!
- These meats are tasty treats.
355
00:11:54,089 --> 00:11:56,173
- Dude, this is rad!
[laughs]
356
00:11:56,299 --> 00:11:57,925
- [laughs]
Right?
357
00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,259
- Best job I've ever had, man.
358
00:11:59,386 --> 00:12:00,761
I don't even feel hot anymore.
359
00:12:00,887 --> 00:12:02,179
- Right?
It's like a sauna.
360
00:12:02,305 --> 00:12:03,680
Like, I feel like
I should be butt naked
361
00:12:03,807 --> 00:12:05,140
with a ton of my dude friends
362
00:12:05,266 --> 00:12:07,059
just relaxing and losing weight.
- [coughs]
363
00:12:07,185 --> 00:12:09,311
It is kind of hard
to see in here, though, huh?
364
00:12:09,437 --> 00:12:10,854
Oh, whoa.
Sorry, dude.
365
00:12:10,980 --> 00:12:12,314
Ah! Ah!
366
00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:14,483
I dropped the roach!
Ah! I'm on fire!
367
00:12:14,609 --> 00:12:15,943
- Hey, Blake!
You're going in the street!
368
00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:18,404
- [screams]
[horn honks]
369
00:12:18,530 --> 00:12:20,239
- Oh, God.
You almost died.
370
00:12:20,365 --> 00:12:21,949
- [screams]
- Blake!
371
00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:23,617
- Adam!
- Blake!
372
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:25,202
- I can't see anything, man!
373
00:12:25,328 --> 00:12:26,495
- Right here, right here.
374
00:12:26,621 --> 00:12:28,122
I got you! I got you!
- Oh, thank God.
375
00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:29,248
- It's just me. It's just me.
It's just me.
376
00:12:29,374 --> 00:12:31,917
Here, let's go this way.
[horn honks, both scream]
377
00:12:32,043 --> 00:12:33,460
Not that way.
The other way.
378
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:34,586
- Ah!
I'm trapped in here!
379
00:12:34,712 --> 00:12:36,463
- Oh, my God.
- I'm trapped in here!
380
00:12:36,589 --> 00:12:39,550
[both scream, tires screech]
381
00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:40,968
Oh, thank you, dude!
382
00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:43,220
I could have been
a corpse burrito, man!
383
00:12:43,346 --> 00:12:44,346
Oh...
- [screams]
384
00:12:44,472 --> 00:12:46,557
- Ow!
- Oh, are you all right?
385
00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:48,016
Let's get you
out of this thing.
386
00:12:48,143 --> 00:12:49,601
- [groans]
387
00:12:49,727 --> 00:12:52,146
Hello, there, miss thang.
Wow.
388
00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:53,522
- Oh, damn.
Are you all right, miss?
389
00:12:53,648 --> 00:12:56,066
- I don't think so.
My mouth!
390
00:12:56,192 --> 00:12:58,402
- Uh, yeah. What?
- It doesn't look that bad.
391
00:12:58,528 --> 00:13:00,320
- God. Hey.
392
00:13:00,447 --> 00:13:02,030
Are you all right?
- No!
393
00:13:02,157 --> 00:13:03,157
- Whoa, Jesus.
- Why does it smell like weed?
394
00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:04,533
- I think it's probably
the skunk.
395
00:13:04,659 --> 00:13:05,659
- Yeah, man,
there's a skunk right there.
396
00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:07,286
- I am so sorry
that this happened.
397
00:13:07,412 --> 00:13:09,163
- Stay the fuck away
from me!
398
00:13:09,289 --> 00:13:10,998
both: Ooh.
- You got a dirty mouth.
399
00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:12,249
- Wee-woo, wee-woo.
- I like that.
400
00:13:12,375 --> 00:13:13,459
- Language alarm.
401
00:13:13,585 --> 00:13:14,960
- I think we ought
to fire you guys
402
00:13:15,086 --> 00:13:16,503
is what needs to happen.
- Yeah.
403
00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:17,921
- Hey, you can't fire us, bud!
404
00:13:18,047 --> 00:13:19,840
We almost just died
in these death traps.
405
00:13:19,966 --> 00:13:21,091
- Hey, don't you sass him!
406
00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:24,261
- We'll sass who we want to sass
when we want to sass 'em.
407
00:13:24,387 --> 00:13:25,762
- Oh, sass
how it's gonna be, huh?
408
00:13:25,889 --> 00:13:27,848
- That's for you, baby!
- Like Will Sasso!
409
00:13:27,974 --> 00:13:29,183
- Let me show you
something, huh?
410
00:13:29,309 --> 00:13:30,642
- They don't respect
what we've built, Karl.
411
00:13:30,768 --> 00:13:32,644
- Maybe we should
stop selling weed.
412
00:13:32,770 --> 00:13:34,271
People like the burritos
just fine without it.
413
00:13:34,397 --> 00:13:35,647
- Stop selling weed?
414
00:13:35,773 --> 00:13:37,483
You make me want to barf
415
00:13:37,609 --> 00:13:40,402
and then scratch your eyes out
like a cat that's barfing!
416
00:13:40,528 --> 00:13:41,987
- We got a food critic
coming tomorrow!
417
00:13:42,113 --> 00:13:43,113
- I don't care about food!
418
00:13:43,239 --> 00:13:45,157
- Wait, wait, wait.
He's right. He's right.
419
00:13:45,283 --> 00:13:47,326
- Get up.
- [grunts]
420
00:13:47,452 --> 00:13:48,702
Stupid frickin'...
- No, no, no.
421
00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,329
Dude, dude, they're right.
422
00:13:50,455 --> 00:13:53,123
I know how important
the food critic is to our dream.
423
00:13:53,249 --> 00:13:54,500
- Cool.
424
00:13:54,626 --> 00:13:56,793
- You once was lost,
but now you found.
425
00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:57,920
- Yes, sir.
426
00:13:58,046 --> 00:13:59,713
- Now pick up the roadkill, like
we asked this morning, okay?
427
00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:01,673
- Oh, we're picking up
the roadkill. Trust me.
428
00:14:01,799 --> 00:14:04,343
- We're not telling you.
We're being cool. We're asking.
429
00:14:04,469 --> 00:14:05,469
- I know.
You're such cool bosses.
430
00:14:05,595 --> 00:14:07,262
This is such a better job
than telemarketing, guys.
431
00:14:07,388 --> 00:14:10,057
- Hey, what's up?
Were you fatalitied by Sub-Zero?
432
00:14:10,183 --> 00:14:11,725
'Cause now
you don't have a spine.
433
00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:14,269
- Oh, no, no, no, no.
Uh, get tha... get the skunk.
434
00:14:14,395 --> 00:14:17,773
- I see what you're saying.
- You do?
435
00:14:17,899 --> 00:14:19,233
Ew, no, no, no, no, don't
pick it up with your hands.
436
00:14:19,359 --> 00:14:21,235
- Oh, it's all "coagluglated."
- Ew.
437
00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:22,903
- It's "coagulegulated."
438
00:14:23,029 --> 00:14:27,324
- [spits]
439
00:14:27,450 --> 00:14:28,700
Morning.
440
00:14:28,826 --> 00:14:30,869
- Well, look who's up early.
- [laughs]
441
00:14:30,995 --> 00:14:31,995
Hey.
- All right.
442
00:14:32,121 --> 00:14:33,497
- [spits]
443
00:14:33,623 --> 00:14:35,040
- Spit-shining the window...
That's awesome.
444
00:14:35,166 --> 00:14:36,375
Soap next time maybe,
though, right?
445
00:14:36,501 --> 00:14:37,751
Yeah.
- Uh, sure.
446
00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:40,087
- Yeah, yeah.
- Outfit brother.
447
00:14:40,213 --> 00:14:43,715
- What? Oh!
What? Oh, my God!
448
00:14:43,841 --> 00:14:45,259
- Look at this!
- This is crazy.
449
00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:46,802
- It's like the same thing.
- Oh, lookit...
450
00:14:46,928 --> 00:14:48,011
- What are you saying?
I have tits?
451
00:14:48,137 --> 00:14:49,805
- No.
It's a good color.
452
00:14:49,931 --> 00:14:51,056
- Don't...
- That's tight.
453
00:14:51,182 --> 00:14:52,808
- Oh, my... dude,
fire, fire in here!
454
00:14:52,934 --> 00:14:54,601
- Ho! Ho!
455
00:14:54,727 --> 00:14:55,894
- Fire!
- What's burning?
456
00:14:56,020 --> 00:14:57,646
- Oh, good morning, guys.
457
00:14:57,772 --> 00:14:59,481
Figured we'd just
get here a little early.
458
00:14:59,607 --> 00:15:01,858
Marinate the meats
for the big-time food critic!
459
00:15:01,985 --> 00:15:04,194
- Yeah.
Uh, awesome.
460
00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:07,197
Thank you.
- No. Thank you, dudes.
461
00:15:07,323 --> 00:15:08,740
Getting up early
and working hard,
462
00:15:08,866 --> 00:15:10,659
that's The American Dream,
Dusty Rhodes.
463
00:15:10,785 --> 00:15:13,245
- Right on. Very well said.
- Good for you.
464
00:15:13,371 --> 00:15:14,913
- All right,
you keep that grill hot,
465
00:15:15,039 --> 00:15:16,665
and we'll let you know
when it's time to grind.
466
00:15:16,791 --> 00:15:18,458
- [laughs]
We... we will.
467
00:15:18,585 --> 00:15:19,835
- All right.
- Love you, bitch.
468
00:15:19,961 --> 00:15:21,295
- Yeah, peace out, gang.
- [laughs]
469
00:15:21,421 --> 00:15:22,963
- You're crossing
your fingers, right?
470
00:15:23,089 --> 00:15:24,339
Okay, good.
Thank God.
471
00:15:24,465 --> 00:15:25,632
- Testing, testing.
- [spits]
472
00:15:25,758 --> 00:15:26,925
- We on the mic...
473
00:15:27,051 --> 00:15:28,218
What are you doing?
474
00:15:28,344 --> 00:15:29,511
What did I tell you?
Karl, come on.
475
00:15:29,637 --> 00:15:31,013
- I'm cleaning.
- But...
476
00:15:31,139 --> 00:15:33,682
- Oh, right, I'm supposed
to use soup.
477
00:15:33,808 --> 00:15:35,058
- Soap.
- Soap.
478
00:15:35,184 --> 00:15:36,393
- Have you been using soup?
479
00:15:36,519 --> 00:15:37,769
- Hi,
I'm Drew Darnell,
480
00:15:37,895 --> 00:15:39,688
food critic
for the Rancho Review.
481
00:15:39,814 --> 00:15:41,231
- Welcome!
- I'm the reason
482
00:15:41,357 --> 00:15:44,067
the Togo's in Rancho
is never not packed.
483
00:15:44,193 --> 00:15:45,944
- No kidding.
Well, that sounds great.
484
00:15:46,070 --> 00:15:47,904
Why don't you take a seat,
Mr. Darnell?
485
00:15:48,031 --> 00:15:50,407
And, uh, Karl,
if you would just go...
486
00:15:50,533 --> 00:15:51,533
- Yep. Sure.
- I'll be right back
487
00:15:51,659 --> 00:15:52,659
with your meal, sir.
488
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:54,077
- Okay, Mr. Darnell.
489
00:15:54,203 --> 00:15:55,454
Let's have you take a sit.
490
00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:57,289
Would you like any water?
491
00:15:57,415 --> 00:16:00,083
Maybe a flat faucet
or perhaps some hose water?
492
00:16:00,209 --> 00:16:01,752
- I brought my own.
- He's here.
493
00:16:01,878 --> 00:16:05,255
So please give us
your best, buds.
494
00:16:05,381 --> 00:16:06,506
[laughter]
495
00:16:06,633 --> 00:16:07,633
- Best buds!
- Best buds.
496
00:16:07,759 --> 00:16:08,842
- Best buds!
- Okay, okay.
497
00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:11,386
- I get it.
That's funny.
498
00:16:11,512 --> 00:16:12,971
- Kick-ass.
499
00:16:13,097 --> 00:16:16,350
He's gonna love this.
Ugh!
500
00:16:16,476 --> 00:16:19,895
- A little cheese, lettuce,
and now for the main event.
501
00:16:20,021 --> 00:16:22,439
- Okay, and... is that his dick?
- What is that?
502
00:16:22,565 --> 00:16:23,815
- All right, let me
really get in here.
503
00:16:23,941 --> 00:16:25,233
- Yeah, there we go.
504
00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:26,610
Stab in there.
Get in there deep. Yep.
505
00:16:26,736 --> 00:16:28,153
- This is what they get
506
00:16:28,279 --> 00:16:29,571
for making us work
like dogs, man.
507
00:16:29,697 --> 00:16:32,240
Killing our dream...
burritos and weed.
508
00:16:32,367 --> 00:16:33,367
- I'll hold it.
- Okay, ready?
509
00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:34,493
- Stab it! Yeah.
- [grunts]
510
00:16:34,619 --> 00:16:35,827
- Oh.
Ew.
511
00:16:35,953 --> 00:16:37,579
- Oh, something...
Something popped.
512
00:16:40,583 --> 00:16:42,709
[beatboxing]
513
00:16:42,835 --> 00:16:45,087
- Ding, ding, ding, ding,
ding, ding, ding, ding!
514
00:16:45,213 --> 00:16:46,755
Ringing the dinner bell.
- Here we go.
515
00:16:46,881 --> 00:16:48,131
- Ringing the dinner bell.
516
00:16:48,257 --> 00:16:49,424
I'm just ringing
the dinner bell.
517
00:16:49,550 --> 00:16:50,842
- I was saying
we gotta get a bell.
518
00:16:50,968 --> 00:16:52,135
- Dinner is...
- Yeah. We got to get one.
519
00:16:52,261 --> 00:16:54,304
- Served.
- It is our pleasure
520
00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:55,847
to serve to you
what I would argue
521
00:16:55,973 --> 00:16:58,100
may be the finest burrito
522
00:16:58,226 --> 00:16:59,893
this little, plucky shop
has ever whipped up.
523
00:17:00,019 --> 00:17:02,270
- Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm.
Bon appe-teach.
524
00:17:02,397 --> 00:17:04,231
- Okay. Thanks, guys.
- Enjoy.
525
00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:06,233
- You got it.
- They're good boys.
526
00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:09,236
- So it's gonna be
about 1.2 pounds...
527
00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:10,987
- Mm-hmm.
- And seven chips.
528
00:17:11,114 --> 00:17:12,322
It's a classic combo.
529
00:17:12,448 --> 00:17:15,117
- That's a good weight.
530
00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:16,410
Uh, wait.
Hang on a second.
531
00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:19,037
Um, yeah.
This thing's cold.
532
00:17:19,163 --> 00:17:20,580
This thing's ice cold, guys.
533
00:17:20,707 --> 00:17:22,165
You're gonna want it
piping hot.
534
00:17:22,291 --> 00:17:23,291
They're really good
when they're hot...
535
00:17:23,418 --> 00:17:24,418
- Pfft.
I'll take it, man.
536
00:17:24,544 --> 00:17:25,544
- Wait. It's...
- I'll take it.
537
00:17:25,670 --> 00:17:26,670
- It's cold, though.
- What is this...
538
00:17:26,796 --> 00:17:27,963
Beef or asada?
- I don't know.
539
00:17:28,089 --> 00:17:30,173
- We just added beef
to our menu.
540
00:17:30,299 --> 00:17:33,468
Ah, I'll figure it out.
541
00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:36,930
Oh, that's beef.
- Oh, yeah?
542
00:17:37,056 --> 00:17:39,015
- That was beef.
Yeah. I love the beef one.
543
00:17:39,142 --> 00:17:40,308
Oh, excuse me.
[chuckles]
544
00:17:40,435 --> 00:17:41,560
- [laughs]
- Dripping a little bit.
545
00:17:41,686 --> 00:17:43,103
- Hey, guys,
if we could just get
546
00:17:43,229 --> 00:17:44,980
one more classic burrito
out here for Mr. Darnell,
547
00:17:45,106 --> 00:17:46,231
that'd be great.
548
00:17:46,357 --> 00:17:47,858
- Coming right up, boss!
549
00:17:47,984 --> 00:17:49,359
- Yeah, get... hold that up.
Hold that up.
550
00:17:49,485 --> 00:17:50,527
Scrape the maggots.
- Oh, yeah.
551
00:17:50,653 --> 00:17:52,696
- You're gonna dig...
this is solid stuff right here.
552
00:17:52,822 --> 00:17:54,322
- [spits]
- Here, let me get...
553
00:17:54,449 --> 00:17:55,824
Let me get some B-hole hairs.
554
00:17:55,950 --> 00:17:57,033
- [laughs]
Nice. Ooh, ooh.
555
00:17:57,160 --> 00:17:59,661
Good call.
- Ooh! Ooh! Oh!
556
00:17:59,787 --> 00:18:01,037
- Ooh.
- Oh, holy moly.
557
00:18:01,164 --> 00:18:02,289
- Ew.
- All right.
558
00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:03,498
- [laughs]
- Sprinkle, sprinkle.
559
00:18:03,624 --> 00:18:07,419
- What's the red sauce?
- Mmm.
560
00:18:07,545 --> 00:18:08,920
- I cannot wait
for you to try this.
561
00:18:09,046 --> 00:18:10,881
- And the juice is loose!
562
00:18:11,007 --> 00:18:13,967
One juicy 'rito.
- Very hot...
563
00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:15,677
Very piping hot.
You're gonna enjoy.
564
00:18:15,803 --> 00:18:17,971
- And it's classic?
- It's so classic, Anders.
565
00:18:18,097 --> 00:18:19,389
- Oh, yeah, I'd call it
566
00:18:19,515 --> 00:18:20,682
an instant classic, for sure.
- Mm-hmm.
567
00:18:20,808 --> 00:18:21,808
You're never gonna
forget this one.
568
00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:23,643
both: Mmm.
- Yum, yum, yum.
569
00:18:23,770 --> 00:18:25,896
[both purr]
Yum.
570
00:18:26,022 --> 00:18:27,022
- Oh!
- So classic.
571
00:18:27,148 --> 00:18:28,315
- Whoa, okay!
572
00:18:28,441 --> 00:18:30,567
Okay, I think
we all saw the steam
573
00:18:30,693 --> 00:18:32,194
shoot out of that one...
Too hot.
574
00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:33,904
- I really don't mind.
- No, let the man eat.
575
00:18:34,030 --> 00:18:35,155
- Let's just get him
another one.
576
00:18:35,281 --> 00:18:36,364
- Why aren't you eating it?
577
00:18:36,491 --> 00:18:37,824
Do you not like the food here?
578
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:39,868
- I love the food here.
It's really good.
579
00:18:39,994 --> 00:18:41,703
I just...
I don't need to eat it.
580
00:18:41,829 --> 00:18:43,455
Why don't you eat it?
- I don't like the food here.
581
00:18:43,581 --> 00:18:46,249
- He does not mean that.
- The food here is... it's good.
582
00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:47,667
It... it's good.
See?
583
00:18:47,794 --> 00:18:49,044
- Mm.
It's pink.
584
00:18:49,170 --> 00:18:50,378
I don't know what part
that was, but...
585
00:18:50,505 --> 00:18:51,505
- Ooh.
- Mmm.
586
00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:52,631
- That's not guacamole.
587
00:18:52,757 --> 00:18:53,757
both: Mmm.
- Mm-hmm.
588
00:18:53,883 --> 00:18:55,133
- [whispers]
Maggots, Anders.
589
00:18:55,259 --> 00:18:57,052
You're eating maggots.
590
00:18:57,178 --> 00:18:58,345
- This is so good.
591
00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:00,138
- Why don't we get
one more burrito
592
00:19:00,264 --> 00:19:04,518
for Drew Darnell, the man that
could put Best Buds on the map?
593
00:19:04,644 --> 00:19:05,852
- You're right.
594
00:19:05,978 --> 00:19:07,229
- That would be awesome,
595
00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:08,939
'cause this one
is freakin' bomb.
596
00:19:09,065 --> 00:19:11,525
- The thing about these burritos
that I love
597
00:19:11,651 --> 00:19:13,777
is that you need one bite,
and you're full.
598
00:19:13,903 --> 00:19:16,363
- Boom shakalaka!
- Mmm. Dig in.
599
00:19:16,489 --> 00:19:17,572
- Yeah, the whole table
600
00:19:17,698 --> 00:19:19,491
can enjoy that one.
- Mm-hmm.
601
00:19:19,617 --> 00:19:20,909
- So we're done here, right?
602
00:19:21,035 --> 00:19:22,536
- Yeah.
- Sure you don't want a bite?
603
00:19:22,662 --> 00:19:24,287
- Sure.
- Ah!
604
00:19:24,413 --> 00:19:26,540
What the hell?
- Wait a...
605
00:19:26,666 --> 00:19:28,792
Is there skunk in this burrito?
- Yes!
606
00:19:28,918 --> 00:19:30,210
- Is there skunk
in this burrito?
607
00:19:30,336 --> 00:19:32,587
- Yeah, Karl, there is skunk
in the burrito,
608
00:19:32,713 --> 00:19:36,174
because you two were acting
like assholes, all right?
609
00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:37,926
This was supposed
to be our dream, man.
610
00:19:38,052 --> 00:19:39,845
We quit our jobs for this.
Now look at it.
611
00:19:39,971 --> 00:19:41,638
This place sucks.
I hate working here.
612
00:19:41,764 --> 00:19:46,142
- Yeah. It was supposed to be
all about weed, burritos...
613
00:19:46,269 --> 00:19:47,435
That was it.
Just two dreams.
614
00:19:47,562 --> 00:19:49,479
- You know what?
You dudes are right.
615
00:19:49,605 --> 00:19:52,023
I was really acting
like this nut sack too much.
616
00:19:52,149 --> 00:19:53,733
- Thank God you realize that.
617
00:19:53,860 --> 00:19:55,068
- I'm gonna go back
to selling weed
618
00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:57,028
on the streets illegally,
all right?
619
00:19:57,154 --> 00:19:59,906
And I don't care if you're
12 years old or 13 years old.
620
00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:01,658
I'm selling weed to you.
- Okay.
621
00:20:01,784 --> 00:20:03,201
- Got the tween market on lock.
I like that.
622
00:20:03,327 --> 00:20:05,453
- Good, man, let's get back
to the basics.
623
00:20:05,580 --> 00:20:07,414
I mean, half the reason
I like doing drugs anyways
624
00:20:07,540 --> 00:20:08,540
is 'cause they're illegal.
625
00:20:08,666 --> 00:20:10,959
- [breathing heavily]
626
00:20:11,085 --> 00:20:14,045
- Okay, so we took
a risk, right?
627
00:20:14,171 --> 00:20:16,381
The least you could do
is commend our efforts
628
00:20:16,507 --> 00:20:18,008
and welcome us back
with open arms...
629
00:20:18,134 --> 00:20:20,969
Strong ones, I might add.
And I did, right then.
630
00:20:21,095 --> 00:20:22,721
- Alice, the thing
you need to think about is,
631
00:20:22,847 --> 00:20:25,015
what would happen
if you didn't hire us back?
632
00:20:25,141 --> 00:20:27,017
- Yeah, like, all hell
would just break loose.
633
00:20:27,143 --> 00:20:29,436
I mean, Waymond would go
fully postal service
634
00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:31,563
by, you know,
starting his own band.
635
00:20:31,689 --> 00:20:32,898
You'd probably
have to go to the gigs.
636
00:20:33,024 --> 00:20:34,274
- But look, here's the deal.
637
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:35,942
We don't just
want our jobs back.
638
00:20:36,068 --> 00:20:38,236
Mm-mm.
We want a raise...
639
00:20:38,362 --> 00:20:39,946
At least 50¢ an hour.
640
00:20:40,072 --> 00:20:41,573
- Okay, check this out.
641
00:20:41,699 --> 00:20:44,367
You're back to your starting pay
of $9.00 an hour.
642
00:20:44,493 --> 00:20:46,745
- $9.00 an hour?
643
00:20:46,871 --> 00:20:49,247
Are you kidding me?
That is fantastic.
644
00:20:49,373 --> 00:20:50,874
- Wow. Wow.
- What?
645
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:52,667
I'm like, what,
we make 9 bucks?
646
00:20:52,793 --> 00:20:54,127
I didn't know we made that much.
- That's kind of a lot.
647
00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:56,338
- Dudes, American dream.
- Thank you so much.
648
00:20:56,464 --> 00:20:57,797
- We're living it.
- This job rules.
649
00:20:57,924 --> 00:20:59,799
- Nice!
650
00:20:59,926 --> 00:21:01,885
[dog snorts]
[party horn blows]
651
00:21:04,972 --> 00:21:06,556
- Oh! Oh! Oh!
652
00:21:06,682 --> 00:21:07,682
- Shit, shit.
- Fuck!
653
00:21:07,808 --> 00:21:10,352
- Shit. Are you okay?
- Ow!
654
00:21:10,478 --> 00:21:13,063
- Oh! Give me the joint.
- Dick. Ow.
655
00:21:13,189 --> 00:21:14,606
- I'm really sorry about that.
656
00:21:14,732 --> 00:21:15,982
I didn't mean to.
I'm so... I'm sorry!
657
00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:17,484
- That's not the kind
of business we're running!
658
00:21:17,610 --> 00:21:18,693
- Asshole.
- I said I was sorry!
659
00:21:18,819 --> 00:21:19,945
Listen...
- Ow!
48491
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