Original subtitles

- [Swanthula] Previously on "Dragula."

- No one's happy to see me? - No!

- None of these faces are gonna change,

unless actions are shown.

- I agree, let me get a chance to show it.

- Prepare your spells and answer the call to adventure

for this week's "Dungeons and Drag Queens Level Two:

The Underdark Challenge".

- There are moments where my perfectionism kicks in,

my inner saboteur.

- You've just gotta let go and let the scene flow.

- That is very easier said than done, girl.

- [Swanthula] Only one of you can win

our Dungeons and Drag Queens campaign,

and the adventurer

who landed the killing blow is.... Koco Caine.

(all cheering)

- Bitch! - Work, bitch!

- Victoria and Erika.

- [Swanthula] You are up for elimination.

- This experience has been amazing,

but I just spent so much time focusing

that I just wasn't being as present

as maybe I could've been.

- Erika, we've given your gnome

something to be happy about.

(horror music)

- You have been banished back to the Underworld.

(Boulet Brothers laugh) (intense music)

♪ ("Dragula Theme" Music) ♪

♪ Drag ♪

♪ Filth ♪

♪ Horror ♪

♪ Glamour ♪

♪ Dragula ♪

♪ She's a killer queen ♪

♪ Dragula ♪

♪ She'll make you scream ♪

♪ Drag, drag, drag, drag, Dragula ♪

- [Swanthula] The winner of

"The Boulet Brothers Dragula: Titans"

will headline the upcoming Dragula World Tour,

receive a $100,000 grand prize, courtesy of us,

and the title of Dragula,

the world's next drag supermonster.

(thunder booming)

♪ Drag, drag, drag, drag, Dragula ♪

(person screams)

(cheesy upbeat music)

- All right, another fucking day here.

What the shit is, wait, wait, whoa!

- Oh my god!

- There's balls on balls.

- What is this?

- I step into the boudoir,

and it's stars, stripes, and eagles,

and I'm like, what the fuck is going on?

- Are we doing a roller rink challenge?

(Abhora squeals)

- How are we all feeling, so far?

- You know, we're about at the midway point

of the competition,

so shit's about to start getting pretty intense and-

- Real, sweetie. - Yeah.

- First of all, gag.

Victoria was in the fucking bottom.

- Right. - Gaggery.

- I will say, as somebody who was in her group,

I thought she was working her ass off

and trying really, really hard

and I thought she did a great job, so-

- But wait, hold on.

Let me- - Yeah, go ahead.

- Going back to the group stuff,

don't you think that one of the reasons

why we're also in the bottom too

is because you kind of kept jumping on top of the director?

- No, not at all.

I don't think that's what happened.

I think what I was trying to do was clarify the situation.

That seems to be maybe a miscommunication.

It was a really hot, crazy, stressful day.

- I know peculiar characters and personalities like Astrud's

can be a tough pill to swallow,

but there's this thing called professionalism

and it seems like my team, and Melissa,

were the only ones that packed it for this show.

- I understand we were in a fucking hot ass fucking place,

but you guys are sitting there

fucking crying like a fucking bitch.

Evah was kind of complaining that it was fucking hot.

Trust me, I've done this before.

Season one, filming in a fucking trailer

that didn't have no fucking AC,

it was fucking ridiculous hot.

- Yes, I was dying.

But I still pushed through, and I kept-

- So did we! - My fucking head in the game.

- I just think that it's really interesting

that you're placing the blame on me

when it seems like it wasn't a situation

of us not working well together,

but of just the other team doing better than us.

- For it to have been a simple misunderstanding,

or whatever you said it was,

word did get around the site real fast

that y'all team were having issues.

From what I heard, it boiled down

to you and Vicky being problematic.

- I- - But what the judges-

- And on set, we heard it from everyone.

- And from what the judges did say,

they tell me is that if it wasn't for my group,

I would've been on the top.

- Melissa's just pissed

because she could've won the challenge,

and so she's gonna blame it on me,

because she can't take responsibility for it.

- I feel like I am being thrown

under the bus a little bit right now, and it kinda hurts.

Everyone was having a hard time,

and I tried to step up and say okay,

here's how we're feeling right now.

As the communicator and leader that I tend to be,

that I could possibly summarize-

- The leader, oh interesting.

- I tend to take a leader role.

- Oh, Astrud.

She's just a fucking brat.

100% a fucking brat.

Not once I saw you as a fucking leader in our group.

- We have a leader in our group?

- No, girl.

- That's not what I was trying to imply.

Sometimes, I like to be the one to step up

and try and help communicate the things

that a group is feeling.

And the fact that nobody had my back

in that moment is kinda sad.

Whoever comes back, I'd like to hear their perspective.

- Well, let's talk about whoever comes back.

I would like to talk about Erika for one quick second.

- Let's talk to Erika about it

when she walks through that door.

- Well, maybe.

Do you think she's coming back?

- Well- - Again?

- Honestly?

How gaggy would that be? - How gaggy would that be!

- It would be a gag.

- Even gaggier if she sent you home.

- I love Vicky, she's one of my friends in this competition,

obviously, but the competitor- - This is news to me.

- Would be like, yeah, it'd be cool if she went home, too.

- I think the only time that the Boulets

can get rid of Victoria was last week,

so it better be her.

- I'm just curious if we're having

a repeat of Erika's season where it's just "I wanna be here,

I wanna be here, I wanna be here",

same old song and dance.

- But she has really refined her vision.

The Erika that I see now-

- Yeah, but it's still in the bottom.

- Erika I saw on season two are two different Erikas.

- Still in the bottom.

I think Erika's time with us is up.

- And Koco, you won the fucking challenge

last week, by the way.

Congrats again, bitch. - Yay!

Congrats, bitch. - Yes, bitch.

- Thank you, thank you.

I may have started from the bottom,

but I'm working my way to the top.

I have to say, for a bitch that did

get sabotaged by somebody,

I did do pretty good for myself.

- What do you mean sabotaged?

- I think it's rather interesting

how my script got switched last minute.

- And you think that somebody in this room was to blame?

- It's another whodunit, y'all.

- I'm gonna look for clues.

- I can't possibly believe

that somebody would sabotage Koco.

It's Koco, come on.

- [Evah] Another note with Yovska's name on it.

- I also find it very interesting how last minute,

before the floorshow,

pieces of my armor went missing.

(Abhora gasps) - Oh my god.

I mean, as a drag artist, honey,

we all lose things.

The dressing room's always a wreck.

I mean, it could've been anything, girl.

Guess who slayed it regardless?

You did. - I know, bitch.

- Can't keep a bad bitch down.

(Victoria growls)

(all screaming)

- Miss Elizabeth Black! - Hi, diva!

- Oh my god, I feel so relieved to walk in this room again.

I was confident that I was coming back,

but you just never know when you're standing up there.

I am feeling invigorated.

I feel more of a fire under my ass now,

so you should be scared now.

- Ooh, ah!

- I was comfortable, and now I'm not.

- Now you're uncomfortable?

- Now I'm uncomfortable, as you should be.

- Oh, I'm fine.

I'm hanging out.

- Vicky, what was the tea

about what happened at the fair, girl?

- Maybe I was a problem in our group.

- Honestly, that wasn't my impression.

I really thought we worked really well together.

- I really walked away from that experience

feeling like we killed it.

- I thought so.

- I seriously think- - I know I had my downfalls

and I sometimes forgot my lines.

Line?

- It is just so weird to me

how the two people that this pertained to saw no problem.

- [Astrud] I was fine.

I was just trying to be a team player.

- It was literally the fact that-

- Girl, you were the one,

the first one who started to bitch about the damn-

- That's bullshit, that's bullshit.

- To be honest, I think Astrud

is playing the two-faced fucking card.

Her season, she fucking blew up

and now she's here, trying to play this victim card,

and it's not gonna fucking go.

I am not gonna feed into that shit, like not with me.

- I started to speak more for the group,

and I did feel a little bit abandoned

because you were really upset,

and when I started to speak for the group,

you didn't speak up.

- I wasn't trying to not take your side at all.

- This seems to be a running trend

in group challenges for me,

so from this point on,

I am just going to focus on me in this competition,

because I'm tired of getting thrown under the bus

for trying to be a helpful, good person.

(music booms) (monsters gasp)

- Oh, fuck. - Okay.

- It's time, let's get it.

- Let's go. - Attention, competitors.

Attention, competitors.

Please make your way to the main stage at this time.

(ominous music)

(tense music)

(thunder booms) (monsters cheer)

- Hello, uglies.

- Hello! - Hi!

- Congratulations on surviving

another week of the competition,

and welcome to Monster High.

(monsters cheering)

- Oh my god!

- This week, we're taking you all back to high school

just in time for graduation,

and a special two-part floorshow challenge.

(thunder booms)

- For part one of this week's challenge,

we want you to create a basic bitch high school prom look,

and model it on the main stage.

(monsters gasping)

While we know you're all good at looking horrible,

monstrous, and ugly,

(Swanthula laughs)

for this part of the challenge,

we want you to put those special effects makeup skills

to the test, and try and look

as beautiful and basic as possible.

The more normal you look by society's standards, the better.

We wanna see a full transformation here.

- After that, your basic bitch will be on their way to prom

where the school will be invaded

by a horde of hungry zombies.

Unfortunately, while your basic bitch

was under the bleachers giving Chad a handjob,

they were bitten by a zombie, killed, and transformed

into a rotten member of the walking dead.

(monsters cheering)

- That means for your second floorshow,

we wanna see your basic bitch look again,

but now we wanna see them transformed

into a full blown zombie.

You'll have to create a living dead version

of your basic bitch look, and slow dance your way

back into the gymnasium, and onto the main stage.

With all that out of the way,

it's time to move on to my favorite part of the evening.

Your Fright Feat.

(ominous music)

- We know you have two looks to create this week,

and all of that work is going to scare up quite an appetite.

To make sure you little flesh eaters are properly fed,

we've prepared a special meal

that will give you all the sustenance you need

to finish your work.

For this week's Fright Feat,

and in honor of our original zombie challenge,

all the way back on season one,

you will be presented with a plate of real pig brains.

Which you must eat and fully consume.

(monsters screaming)

- To remind you, everyone must participate and succeed

in the Fright Feat in order

to move on to the next challenge.

Should you fail in completing the challenge,

or refuse to participate,

you will be immediately removed from the competition

and the last monster to be exterminated before you

will return to take your place.

(horror music)

But, whoever eats their pig brains the fastest

will win the Fright Feat and gain immunity

from extermination in this week's challenge.

(monsters cheering)

- Okay, okay. - Girl, I'm gonna die.

- Good luck, darlings, and may the best monster win.

Many of you might be thirsty,

but I can promise you, after this,

none of you will go hungry.

At least... not tonight!

(ominous music)

(Swanthula laughs)

(eerie music)

(thunder booming)

(horror music)

(suspenseful music)

- Oh! - That's disgusting.

- Ew! - What the fuck is that?

- [Koco] So the Fright Feat this week is to eat brains.

- Prize this week is a spot of safety,

and I really need that.

- This is actually the first time

that the prize for the Fright Feat is straight up immunity,

so the stakes are pretty high.

(suspenseful music)

(bell rings)

(intense music) (brains squelching)

(monsters groaning)

(monsters coughing)

- That is nasty as shit.

(Melissa gagging)

Now I know why Loris didn't wanna eat the brains.

- By choice, I have not consumed animal products

for three years,

but goddamn it, I'm not going home tonight.

(brains squelching)

(Astrud gags) - Okay.

(monsters gagging) (brains squelching)

(Koco groans)

(Koco spits)

(dramatic music)

(Melissa retches)

(Melissa gags)

(monsters gagging)

(Melissa coughing)

- I'm done!

- Damn! (Victoria retches)

- [Astrud] Motherfucker.

- I thought I was gonna win,

but Evah literally devoured those brains.

- Vibe check. - Aww.

- Aww! (monsters clapping)

That's cute.

- Now where's the pig blood? - Safe queen, safe queen.

- I mean, with a mouth like this,

I'm not even surprised that I won.

Oh, thank you, thank you so much.

Oh my god, you guys, thank you so much.

Oh, I couldn't believe it.

Oh yeah, you all suck, okay.

- Have a great summer, bitch. - You suck, yeah.

(snake hissing) (eerie music)

(thunder booms)

(dramatic music)

- Oh lord.

(Astrud laughs)

- Very lovely.

- Having immunity this week feels so good.

I feel like I can actually have fun with this challenge

and not be sweating so much,

and I could actually even take the time

to help anyone who needs it.

- Zombie prom!

- I know!

What a fun challenge.

- You know, I've never actually been to prom.

- Me neither, me neither, girl.

- We don't have prom back home, no.

- So what did you end up doing, then?

- I just stayed home.

- You stayed home, okay.

- I mean, all I heard was that prom always sucked.

I've never heard good memories of prom.

- At least from gay people.

We don't have prom back home,

so I'm actually kind of excited

to live out my American teen high school fantasy.

- Let's have the prom we never had instead.

- Okay. - All right.

- Okay. - Yes, bitch.

Absolutely.

- HoSo?

Will you be my date to the prom?

(monsters laughing)

- Koco?

Would you be my prom date?

(Koco squeals)

- I'd be more than happy to.

- [Victoria] Oh my goodness.

- Wait, was that a yes or a no?

(Astrud laughs)

- Even though I was gonna ask Jason Fitzpatrick

to the dance, Melissa, will you please be my prom date?

- [Melissa] Me?

(Melissa laughs)

No, I mean yes!

- Yes! - I would love to!

- [HoSo] Okay, that's just cruel.

- [Victoria] Oh my god, look how sweet, you guys.

- What, do you?

Do you have plans for prom?

She doesn't say much,

but I can feel a really strong connection.

(monsters laughing)

- Shall we discuss our color schemes?

- Yeah.

- [HoSo] Wait, are we doing a team thing?

Well Abhora, you're not, okay,

we have to be together.

That wasn't fun.

Let's be on the same table.

- What?

No, go. - Yes!

No, no, no, no, no, that wasn't fun.

- No, I've got a bit.

- [Astrud] HoSo, I do wanna talk to you about something.

- Go, go, go, I'm okay.

- That was really cruel of you guys, I don't know.

That didn't feel great at all.

- It was a joke.

It was more of just a playful thing.

People just need to kind of just breathe.

You know what, let's go to the cauldron.

Yeah, yeah. - Let's go.

- Yeah, we need to- - Let's fucking go.

- [Evah] Let's go chat.

- Abhora has a tendency to deflect with comedy

when it comes to uncomfortable situations,

so even though she's laughing,

I know she is hurt in the moment.

- It's okay.

It's not serious.

Can I talk to you about something else?

- [HoSo] Yeah, sure.

- Here, come with me.

Abhora's having fun with this mannequin, we're all laughing,

it's obviously not a big deal.

You seem pretty like, out of it right now.

- Yeah.

- Are you still thinking about Abhora?

- [HoSo] Yeah, 'cause what just happened.

That wasn't funny.

She just got singled out.

(Astrud sighs)

- Look, she's fine.

You're doing great.

- I am calling campus security.

- Do you wanna talk to her?

Because I don't really want to talk about this.

HoSo's incredibly distracted by this.

I'm trying to talk to her,

and she won't even look me in the eye.

I'm gonna let HoSo fight this battle,

because I really can't get involved right now.

- Why, are you okay?

- [HoSo] This is not fun, no.

They shouldn't be doing this right now.

- [Abhora] I know.

- [HoSo] This is not fun.

- I'll be okay.

I get why HoSo's checking on me,

but I don't think she should make a big deal out of this.

I'm just trying to have fun.

- I don't know why HoSo ran over to Abhora

like this was some pity party.

This could be a reason why she feels led on half the time.

(Koco groans)

You okay, gal?

- [Koco] Yeah, I just gotta pee real quick.

- [Victoria] You gotta pee?

- I'm kinda over this,

so I'mma go check on my girls in the Cauldron.

- How do you feel about potentially us

being in the finale together?

- I would like to see you there with me.

- Yeah?

- Is she in my top three?

No, but how do you tell someone that

when they're sitting across the table from you?

Where is everyone else?

We're missing gals.

- Everyone's out having chats and shit.

- I took the chance to go ahead and talk to Evah one on one

'cause honestly, I don't know who else to talk to

about Abhora, HoSo, and Astrud.

We are watching these three bitches fucking fight and argue.

We couldn't even fucking concentrate

on the things that we're doing.

How are you feeling with this whole situation?

- The HoSo, Astrud, Abhora thing really wore me down

because I felt like I was in the middle,

and I'm like, who cares?

This is stuff that you can talk about another time.

Not to mention, Astrud has this certain

know-it-all type deal about her.

- It's very me, me, me, me, me, me.

- Surprise, motherfuckers. - Oh, hey.

- Oh, hi bitch.

- What's the tea?

- We were just catching up on Astrud's tea, honey,

because we are quite fed up with her bullshit.

- It seems as though Astrud's

just rubbing everyone the wrong way.

I really don't know what to do about it,

but she's not careful,

somebody's gonna figure out what to do about it.

- As soon as I heard that she was playing this diva on set,

that shit does not fly.

If that happened in our group,

and she pulled that shit,

I would've gone the fuck off.

- It was just a lot all at once, that's all.

- Stop focusing on what you don't have in that situation,

and work with what,

you are living fucking proof of that, bitch.

You said you got the wrong script,

you didn't have this and that,

some of your armor was missing,

and what the fuck did you do?

You made it work.

- I'm just not featuring her shit.

I'm gonna focus on me, and me only.

- I mean, that's already a great strategy

because you've been fucking killing it.

Being on the bottom first episode,

but then it's like a swift climb the fuck up, girl.

- Dare I say, this may just be the rise of Koco Caine, baby?

- Ooh, okay!

(Evah laughs)

- Well, let's get back to work, bitches.

- Yes, please, yeah. - All right, let's get back.

I gotta make sure I can still fit in this gown

after eating all them brains.

(tense music)

- All right, hotties.

Am I allowed to even like, talk to you guys together?

- No, but bitch, that's what we're trying to avoid

is having like-

- All right, motherfuckers.

- I'm trying to let Abhora know,

I still think that what just happened wasn't cool.

The whole bit was just really cruel.

- Hearing you guys over here talk about this affects me too,

and not in a good way.

- Girl, see what I mean?

They're still fucking going at it.

(Melissa sighs)

- I'm gone for five minutes,

and all hell breaks loose, again.

What the fuck is going on in here?

- It's annoying already at this point.

It's hard being in a competition and staying focused,

and now we have to deal

with this fucking bullshit ass drama.

- The energy is-

- Well, it's not our fault at all.

- What do you want me to do?

- I don't want you to,

I don't want you to necessarily do anything,

but when I pull you aside,

and when I wanna go talk to you in the corner

and then you won't even focus on me because-

- [HoSo] Well yeah, because I was startled.

- Yeah, I know.

- By the gross thing that had just happened.

- Also, Astrud, did that really affect you?

I'm sorry that I took her away from you-

- It wasn't, no, it wasn't that, dude.

You didn't take her away from me, whatever.

I can't, this is what I can't.

- I just, I don't know what to do.

I don't know how this all spun out of control.

I was just trying to have fun,

and now it's becoming a serious thing.

- I can't even like- - What's up, girl?

- It just gets accusational immediately.

Fuck off!

- It's her word. - Fuck off!

(Koco coughs)

- All right, motherfuckers!

Can y'all just shut the fuck up,

and let's get to work.

(eerie music)

We don't have the immunity, so.

- [Astrud] You know it's a performance competition.

- Performance competition. - So.

(eerie music)

- My inspiration for my prom zombie look,

it's my damn self honey,

'cause you know it's the glamour motherfucking challenge

and it's right up my alley.

I chose to go with a different color,

'cause I already know these bitches

were gonna go fucking pink.

This is my crown, 'cause no one's wearing a crown but me.

You can tell these bitches

are just the candidates, I'm the queen.

Period.

So, for the zombie portion,

I'm gonna be bald-headed.

I'm gonna have some webs in my hair,

just a few strands here and there,

and I've been working on this lovely little pieces of latex

that I'm gonna be sticking to my body

to make it look very gory.

We're gonna go ahead and lay the latex,

and you just grab the toilet paper,

and just give it texture.

And boom honey, you end up with some layers.

99 cents, and some balloon latex

will get you a long way, bitch.

(Melissa giggles)

- So for this week's challenge,

I'm inspired by "Dawn of the Dead" and "Daria."

I wanted to just kinda take a note

from the judges this week

and just not overthink it too much, and just have fun,

so I'm going to make this cute little cheerleader outfit

and it's gonna be just fun.

I started with just a simple spandex bodysuit,

and then I got in my bathtub

and coated it in latex Pros-Aide with water,

and a little bit of acrylic paint.

And now I'm going to apply these latex sheets

that I've laid out, let dry, powdered down,

and I think this one could use another coat of paint on top.

And if we draw back the veins a little bit,

it adds layers of dermis.

It'll be fun.

- So, my inspiration for zombie prom

is like classic kind of '80s prom,

as well as pageant queens.

I wanna do sort of a hybrid of both.

So to turn my basic bitch look into a zombie look,

I have sort of taken the same dress,

and then deconstructed it.

This is liquid latex and spiderwebs on top of dance tights

that drag queens use every day

to get into the beat and everything.

Drag queens like to call these titties chicken cutlets

because of the shape,

and I've sort of spray adhesived them on to a mesh shirt.

So once these are both put together,

it's gonna give the illusion

that I have a full, gory, zombie body.

And I've also got these little zombie lips with teeth

for my, you know, my special place.

(Astrud laughs)

(eerie music)

- All right, I don't know about y'all

but I have a dress fitting to get to,

so I'm getting out of here.

- [Evah] Let's go to prom.

(intense music)

(clock ticking)

(Swanthula laughing)

- Come on, baby.

This is the happiest night of our lives.

- Day, floorshow day!

We going to prom!

- Baby, it's prom night!

The dress is right, trying to get this body tight,

and we gonna turn the fuckin' party.

(tense music)

(Abhora sighs)

There's major fucking tension in this room right now,

and I'm not here for it.

- It's starting to make me feel

very uncomfortable with the tension.

It kinda sucks, 'cause we're about to do floorshow.

- [Koco] Yeah, what's the tea?

- I mean, are y'all doing okay?

- We're good.

- What was this whole thing going on

between Astrud going "oh, this is what I'm talking about",

What was going on with that shit?

- Well, I'm not entirely sure myself.

- Listen, I'm just gonna reiterate what I said yesterday.

I don't want these kinds of distractions

to keep me from doing the best that I know

that I possibly can with every single challenge.

I really wanna be here.

- I feel like there's still some sort of energy.

- It's obviously an issue!

- It's just irritating

because it doesn't feel like it's my problem,

and I feel like I keep getting roped into it.

- You're involved, so you can't really avoid it.

- This problem never included me.

This was an issue that is between HoSo and Abhora,

and they've gotta work that out on their own.

And unfortunately, they keep dragging me in.

- The only person I can blame is HoSo.

She is leading on both of 'em.

- HoSo was checking on me when I was last to be picked.

- [Koco] Girl, it really wasn't even that deep.

- [Victoria] Not even that deep, gal.

- No, but what that turned into?

- What y'all let it turn into?

'Cause it was supposed to be cute.

Do we not go to prom with dates?

- Supposed to be cute.

- It's just that- - Why did it get so personal?

It was simple.

- Okay. - Damn!

- Okay. - The fuck?

Snap out of it.

Get your head in the game.

- [Melissa] We should all be head in the game, honey.

- I'm surprised HoSo hasn't tried to intervene,

especially since she kind of caused this?

- So are you, wait, hold on a second.

So is that what all of that was this whole time?

Y'all over there kiki-ing and cuckoo-ing over that?

- We're not kiki-ing.

- That's what it seemed like earlier.

It seemed like a big ol' discussion,

and that was what it pertained to?

- It's exhausting because something so simple

turned into this big thing.

We were just talking about prom dates,

and then all of a sudden we're getting into deeper issues.

Someone needs a hug.

- HoSo was checking on me while I was-

- That resulted, that is the,

what I'm asking is is that what that resulted in?

- Yeah.

- I know you fuckin' lying, girl.

Continue, carry on.

I regret asking.

Proceed as you may.

Chile, that's a- - Mama.

- Wow, I'm gagged, honestly.

- I don't- - That turned into that.

That simple question turned into all of this?

- I don't know why this keeps getting brought up to me,

but I'm not trying to make this about me.

- We're all tired of hearing about this.

I just don't know what to do to fix it.

- I was trying to make sure

that Abhora was comfortable in the situation

that I could potentially see turning into something bad,

but maybe I just made it worse.

Regardless though, if Abhora caused a lot of it,

it was very obvious that Abhora

was gonna be left out by the end of it.

I know Abhora was trying to make light of the situation

by doing this whole bit,

and taking it to the extreme,

so I went to check on Abhora.

And then, well Astrud and Abhora's thing

is the entirely different thing.

- Mm, titty-fucking baby, boo the fuck hoo.

A titty baby is somebody who constantly

is just hanging off your nipple,

just attached at it, won't grow up,

will constantly need somebody to feed them,

and then keep them alive.

That's a titty fuckin' baby.

- Damn, y'all got real quiet.

(Melissa giggles)

(upbeat electronic music)

(horror music) - Oh, shit!

- Oh my darn.

- Attention, competitors. - Shit, shit, shit, shit.

(monsters shouting)

- [Announcer] The floorshow is about to begin.

- I didn't shave my coochie! - Makeup right now.

- [Swanthula] The floorshow is about to begin.

- My boyfriend's picking me up at nine!

- At least you have a boyfriend.

- [Swanthula] Please make your way to the main stage.

(bell tolls)

(intense music)

♪ "Boulet Brothers Entrance Theme" ♪

- Welcome to Headstone High,

where tonight we're featuring our graduating class of 1987

in a two-part flesh-eating floorshow extravaganza.

- For part one of this week's challenge,

we've asked our remaining drag artists

to conceptualize and create basic bitch prom looks

where the goal is to look

as mainstream and "normal" as inhumanly possible.

We want our usually hideous monsters

to show us their true special effects makeup skills

by taking pretty ugly, and making it just pretty.

- For the second part of the challenge,

we've asked our drag monsters to evolve their basic looks

into undead zombie versions of themselves.

They must take their newly created basic characters,

and fully transform them into ugly,

worm-filled, rotten versions of themselves,

and model their new looks on the main stage.

- Here to help us judge tonight's putrid pageant

is soap starlet turned horror icon,

the incomparable Barbara Crampton.

Barbara, from "Days of Our Lives" to "Chopping Mall,"

"Re-Animator," and "Puppet Master,"

no one is more qualified

to judge tonight's double feature beauty pageant than you,

and we are thrilled to have you here.

- I relate to being a basic bitch.

(Boulet Brothers laughing)

So, thank you for having me.

I'm honored.

- And our next judge knows everything there is

to know about horror.

She's an award-winning author, horror historian,

and two-time "Dragula" guest judge,

the divine Tananarive Due.

Tananarive, welcome back darling.

We hope you're ready to pin

some corsages on our competitors,

preferably... right through the brain.

- Yes I am, because my actual high school proms

were an absolute horror,

so this can only be an improvement.

(Boulet Brothers chuckle)

- Now, without further ado,

it's time to dim the lights.

- Start the music.

- And let the floorshow begin!

(dramatic music)

(upbeat music)

(wonky music)

- [Swanthula] It's prom time at our school of ghouls,

where zombies spiked the punch.

Rotting flesh, spilled and spewed,

so we all eat brains for lunch.

The girl next door is no more,

better aim for her head.

That basic bitch has been transformed...

The prom queen is undead.

(Swanthula laughs)

(wonky music)

(horror music)

(girls screaming)

(zombies snarling) (intense music)

(zombies snarling)

(zombie gurgling)

(upbeat music)

(tender music)

(eerie music) (wind whistling)

So Drac, how did you like this double dose

of the season one challenges?

Basic bitch and the zombie challenge?

- I loved it, 'cause I love the basic bitch

because it's easy, for people on our show,

to transform themselves into monsters every week,

but I always think it's fun to see them

have to transform themselves

into something really basic and easy.

- Yeah, it's definitely very difficult

for a lot of them to do pretty.

(Boulet Brothers laugh)

- What did you think about Astrud?

- When Astrud first came out, I was very excited

because Astrud looked pretty.

I wasn't looking at a lizard,

I wasn't looking at a cryptid,

I was looking at a pretty girl.

- Not a lizard.

(Boulet Brothers laugh)

- [Swanthula] There was some elegance to the movement

when Astrud was giving us her basic bitch,

and I was impressed by it.

The zombie, not so much.

I thought it was pretty middle of the road,

very par for the course.

- I feel like I need Astrud to surprise me.

I'm starting to see a sameness to her looks.

It's the bodysuit with the texture over it,

and then a couple of accoutrements.

I'm like, we did this already.

It's time to see something different.

- [Swanthula] Mm-hmm.

- Evah performed towards the front of the pack,

and at first I was really here for her characterization,

but when she transformed, I don't think it got big enough.

- Evah was giving us that shunned nerd,

very Josie Grossie at the prom,

but I don't think Evah's zombie was the strongest tonight.

- Well, she needed an inhaler, so probably not.

- Probably not.

- Let's talk about Melissa for a moment.

- Yes.

- Of course we know,

Melissa Befierce is the quintessential pageant queen,

and she's gonna nail this, and she did.

And then when she transformed, I was really shocked

because she went for it.

You don't see that from a glamour girl, usually.

- I agree.

You cannot deny that the energy

with which she attacks the challenge

is infectious, it's exciting, and it's electric.

- Their performance is killer.

- [Swanthula] I would've liked to see the prosthetics

a little more concealed.

- [Dracmorda] The prosthetics were a little sloppy.

- They were crunchy. - They were.

- Let's talk about HoSo for a minute.

- I might be seeing too much of HoSo

consistently in her drag looks.

- Mm, how do you mean?

- Well, I think it's important to be recognizable,

and to show your drag in everything,

but there's almost starting to be

a similarity to every look.

- [Swanthula] I agree, and I know HoSo can paint

very soft, and very femme.

I would've loved to see that fantasy.

- [Dracmorda] Yeah.

- [Swanthula] But there's something to be said

about still recognizing HoSo in this drag as well.

- Okay, Abhora surprised me.

When she first came out I was like, you're not in the theme.

You're a cheerleader.

But then, when you were like,

well maybe she was a sad cheerleader

that didn't make it to prom,

or she got expelled or something before prom,

then I was like okay, maybe.

And then when she transformed into a zombie,

it was a complete transformation.

- [Swanthula] It was brilliant!

It was so good, what a standout.

But Abhora is kind of her own worst enemy,

because she did not complete the assignment.

- What do you do with someone like that?

They're an incredible drag artist,

but they continuously keep missing the ball,

over, and over, and over.

I have a question for you.

How come Abhora wore stacked heels again,

and fell, and fell?

And I don't mean during the zombie part,

during the fucking prom part!

She was walking across the stage

in those big ass stacked heels and fell again!

That is every challenge.

- [Swanthula] She throws herself into her characters.

She throws herself across the stage.

- No, you're wrong. - It's what she does.

- It is not on purpose, it is not on purpose.

- Oh, I'm not saying it's on purpose.

- Cannot walk in her heels.

I personally think it's gonna be very hard to pick a winner,

and it's going to be double hard

to pick someone to fall through that trap door.

What do you think about maybe

letting someone else pick for us?

- Oh.

- I feel like it's time

for things to get a little more real.

There's $100,000 up for grabs, and a crown.

And I think we could influence them

to get a little more raw with each other.

- I think it's time we changed the rules

and throw them an unexpected curveball.

- I like the sound of that.

- Well on that note, I think it's time

we have our chaperones join us,

and make our way to the prom.

- You really said that like we were on stage right now.

I'm right here.

(Dracmorda laughs)

(ominous music)

- As always, I want to remind you

that we are not here to judge your drag.

Drag is art, and art is subjective.

What we are judging you on is your drag

as it relates to this competition,

and the challenges we put before you.

- We are now halfway through the competition,

so congratulations to you all for making it this far.

(monsters cheering)

This competition can be difficult to navigate at times,

so we would like to offer you all our critiques

on your floorshow performances,

and our best advice on surviving

the next half of the competition.

Let's start with Evah.

- Evah, your awkward girl actually reminds me

of how I looked at my high school prom,

so I could totally relate to you.

The glasses caught in the hair,

that was such a great, great-

- Oh, that's where they were.

- Touch.

But I could see your original character

trapped within the zombie character,

and that was just fantastic.

- Evah, I really appreciated your commitment to a character,

and I felt like you brought a really strong back story.

It was really glorious to watch.

- Thank you so much, I really appreciate that.

- I would say think about how you might be able

to bring a little more volume

to some of your looks going forward,

just because, again, looking down the line,

there's gonna be parade floats up here.

You gotta kinda think about how you can make sure

your looks pop out as much as your performance does.

- Noted, thank you.

- Let's move on to Melissa.

- You are disgusting, in all the best possible ways.

- Thank you.

- And I really loved the performance aspect.

Great screaming, I would've called 911 if I heard that.

I just loved it.

- Thank you so much.

- I think everyone was serving pink princesses,

and you showed up as the queen.

I think you bring character and story to everything,

and it's just a joy.

- Your makeup for the zombie was really good,

but I did feel like the seams between the zombie makeup

and your own flesh were not smooth enough,

so I saw the distinction between the two

a little bit too much.

- Melissa looked like a circumcision nightmare.

(Astrud laughs)

- I would say going forward,

be weary of competing with people

in things that they're the best at,

you understand what I'm saying?

- Yes.

- And remember your strengths,

and don't feel like you have to

outdo people at their strengths.

- Gotcha, thank you.

I went a different direction, and I guess it didn't work,

so I'm bummed out.

- [Swanthula] Moving on to Astrud.

- I think part of acting

is about being able to reveal yourself,

and being naked, and your zombie

peeled the layers of your clothes away,

and metaphorically, you were naked.

- I'm so thankful you picked up on that,

'cause that was actually pretty intentional.

- I mean, it's such a terrific look.

I mean, you've got teeth in your tender regions there,

and some of it looks a little bit more alien than ghoul,

and that's really my only nitpick.

- Not teeth in her tender regions.

(all laughing)

Astrud, I was gagged at how beautiful you looked.

(Astrud laughs)

As a criticism, I would say this.

Usually you think outside the box,

but tonight you were very much inside the box.

I mean, if we look down the line,

there's a lot of pink dresses,

so I would say keep pushing

that outside of the box perspective that you're known for.

- I can do that.

- What I would give you

is sort of more advice for the future.

- Yeah.

- We're seeing a lot of similar suits and textures,

and I'd just like to see you show us something different,

but you did great tonight.

- Thank you so much.

Zombies really are just not my thing.

I don't even know if I've seen a zombie movie.

The only zombie I've ever seen

is Victoria when she's trying to make a joke.

(eerie music)

- Let's talk about Koco.

- All the characters, Koco,

were in pain when they became a zombie,

and you were in pleasure!

And what a choice that was.

It was unique, and new, and fresh,

and it was really sexy.

- Honestly, zombie isn't just a category:

It's a way of life.

(Swanthula laughs)

- I think what I was most impressed with

is the horror makeup.

The bones coming through the legs,

the twists in the musculature.

I wasn't expecting that from you,

and I thought it was just an amazing surprise,

and a great performance.

- Thank you.

- Your prom look was so beautiful,

from head to toe I thought it was flawless.

If I had to give you any advice at all,

I would say think about how you can force yourself

outside of your comfort zone when you're performing.

You gotta not be afraid to look a little stupid

if you're gonna perform in drag.

- I do it all the time.

- I think you're growing rapidly,

and it is very exciting to see.

- Thank you.

- I love the big hair.

Is there a way you could have

more incorporated the hair into the zombie character?

It's disheveled, but is there a way

it could also have been better incorporated,

just because the competition is so tough.

- Tananarive Due came for my wig!

Gag!

She said, Tanana said that weave don't.

- Let's talk about Abhora.

- I love performers who are risk takers,

and you chose to be a cheerleader.

It didn't scare me, but I don't know if it was supposed to,

because you made a commitment,

I give you 100% on that.

- Thank you.

- I love the way you committed to your cheerleader.

That is a very unique look.

Your pom-poms were flying a bit wild there at the end,

so I don't (giggles).

I know you were trying to put your breast foot forward,

but maybe tonight wasn't the night.

- Chile, I don't understand how she died

and her titties came off like that?

Girl, I got questions.

- Abhora, you are brilliant. - Woo!

- But sometimes I think you're your own worst enemy,

because the assignment called for prom.

However, you went rogue,

which we are used to,

and I think you did it with flair, and style.

We were all laughing throughout your performance,

and I love it.

- Thank you.

- Maybe some of the craftsmanship of the pieces

could be improved.

Maybe that's something to pay a little more attention to,

but you're definitely making up for it

in your characterization.

- Abhora was wearing a cheerleader costume.

It was a very nice cheerleader costume,

but it was a cheerleader costume.

- And Victoria.

- Both your basic bitch,

and your zombie look, were incredible.

You took your hair, and turned it into intestines.

That was a hair-brained idea.

(all laughing)

And it really paid off. - Thank you.

- It was so elegant, and you loved it.

You were enjoying it the whole time.

I've never seen you in that light before,

and it was unbelievable.

(Victoria laughs)

- You really got into character this time.

You went from flawless pageant queen

to bloodthirsty, brain-eating zombie instantly.

The contrast there was extreme,

and that made you stand out, I think.

- Thank you so much.

- Victoria, you were definitely that bitch at prom

everybody would love to hate.

- Bitch, you bitch!

(all laughing)

Very Regina George, oh my god.

- During your transformation,

it's like I could just see you coming undone

from this perfection to this monstrosity,

but it's all kinda trapped within the bow.

From beginning to end,

just an absolutely fantastic performance.

- Thank you so much.

I'm so proud how this look came together,

whether it was my basic bitch, or my zombie,

I'm very happy.

- Moving on to HoSo.

- HoSo, I watched you in season four,

and I was a big admirer.

Your zombie was really unique, and different,

and I always feel like I see you thinking

about what can I do that's different?

And I appreciate that, as a performer.

- Thank you so, so much.

- Your take on the zombie was very unique.

I love the cavity just split open,

like something exploded from you.

I think you did something special

that I'd like to point out.

You reminded us that drag

can also be a way to share social messages,

and your performance tonight

told us about bullying, or slut-shaming,

and I thought it was very important.

- I love that your look was gore galore.

I would just say maybe there are some concepts

in your zombie that also feel a little alien.

And that's really about it.

I thought you were fantastic,

and just mesmerizing to look at.

- I love this approach to zombie,

'cause you went kind of Resident Evil,

like mutation beyond mutation, right?

I think you're doing fantastic in the competition

as far as going forward,

I would say, maybe think about how you can surprise us.

Give us something that we just

couldn't even recognize it was you.

You know, just to show that you can do other things,

'cause I know you can.

- Completely understood.

I know I could've pushed it further

when it comes to glamour,

but I thought I looked really fucking pretty.

- Now, it's time to announce the winner

of our basic bitch zombie prom challenge.

Due to their ability to be pretty ugly,

and bringing life to the undead,

(suspenseful music)

Victoria, you have secured the win tonight.

- Ah! (monsters applauding)

- Work, bitch. - Congratulations, my darling.

You are Dragula's first prom queen.

- Yay!

I can't believe I won the basic bitch challenge,

and I'm so happy to be your prom queen.

- Koco, you also performed extremely well tonight,

and should Victoria not be able

to fulfill her responsibilities as queen,

the crown would pass to you to fulfill her duties.

(all laughing)

- That being said, as they say,

heavy is the head that wears the crown.

(intense music)

And tonight, your head may be the heaviest.

- Oh god.

What?

- What is going on?

- As the winner of the challenge,

you will decide the two competitors

who you feel will be up for elimination tonight.

(intense music)

(Victoria sighs)

- They're ruining my prom!

- I'm not worried about Victoria putting me in the bottom

because she saw me in her top three,

so I don't really see this as a threat.

- This season is just full of surprises.

- I don't know who Victoria's gonna put in the bottom two,

but I do know that it's not me, because I'm safe.

- Wouldn't it be a gag if Victoria chose herself?

Girl, do me the favor.

- We're going to release you and your peers to the cauldron

to discuss these developments.

And we'll call you all back to the stage

once you've made your final decision.

- And please enjoy the punch bowl spiked with SERV vodka

that's waiting for you in the cauldron.

We have a feeling you're going to need it.

(Dracmorda laughs) - Wow.

(intense music)

(upbeat music)

(record scratches)

(somber music)

- So as prom queen, I have to choose who goes in the bottom

and this is a lot of responsibility.

I'm gonna try to play as fair as I can,

and just follow my gut.

I wanna hear why everyone wants to stay.

- I've been safe once, high every episode.

I have one win.

Yeah, I don't think it makes sense for me to go right now,

and that's all I have to say.

- HoSo put Miss Yovska in the bottom

without her being in the bottom.

- I don't know who I'm gonna put down.

Maybe I'll put HoSo's name down,

just like she did for Yovska the first week.

- Without track records, without even pleading,

I'd like to think it's very obvious why I wish to be here,

why I will continue to be here.

(tense music)

- Whoa, that was really cool.

- [Astrud] What's your thought process right now, Victoria?

- I am gonna think of how you did today,

and did things fall apart,

is there skin showing, or things like that?

- If she goes with technicality,

I'm definitely gonna be put in the fucking bottom

'cause I know that my application could've been better,

but we will see.

- It may suck who ends up there,

but that is not in my control.

That is what you did.

- I really have so much more to show,

and maybe I have been playing it a little bit safe,

but I just feel like I get so close,

every single time, you know?

- That's what happens when you play it safe.

- Victoria, honestly I hope that you do

take in consideration the work environment

when we get ready.

This whole relationship trio thing

is just frustrating at this point.

I want you to think about that, too.

- Totally. - That's all I can say,

and I need to be quite honest with you.

- I will think about how everyone acts professionally.

- Go ahead, huff and puff, girl.

- I'm not huffing and puffing,

I'm just kind of annoyed

because I feel like we have a good rapport,

and then out of nowhere, you kind of snap at me.

You know, you did it in the boudoir about our DnD thing,

and tried to put all that blame on me.

- [Melissa] Don't you think it was the reason

why we're in the bottom?

- I don't think that,

and I think Victoria came to my defense on that.

I feel like they're looking for something

to throw me under for,

maybe because they don't fucking like me.

Maybe because they see me as a threat, I don't know.

I really don't know.

- I will agree, but also agree with Melissa on this,

because you have been making it a lot about you

in moments when you are in distress,

and that's the moments I'm like ooh,

she's being a little bit of a diva.

I don't know how I feel about that.

- I think Abhora and Astrud should be in the bottom

because you, once again, have misunderstood the assignment.

I would be surprised

if you nailed a challenge subject on the head,

if you got the opportunity to stay.

I'mma need for Abhora to go home,

because she just can't seem to understand the assignment.

Girl, what's the point of issuing the challenge

if you gonna just show up as whatever you want?

- This is just to be messy.

I wanna see the lovebirds in the bottom.

Just for the fact that HoSo, you are heavy competition,

and I would like to see you sweat a little bit,

and you, I would also like to see you up there

just for the fact that maybe that would put

more of a fire under your ass,

and that's all I have to say on it.

Victoria gets really stressed out by constant drama.

- I'm fucking over it.

- She should look at the group going forward,

and who we wanna deal with.

- Victoria needs to break up the triangle.

She needs to put two of 'em up for elimination.

- I'm gonna say Melissa, and Abhora.

- And I would have to agree with HoSo's opinion.

I would also say Melissa and Abhora.

- Bitch, you wearing a whole fucking bodysuit of latex.

- Yeah, where's yours?

I can see your whole back.

- Who gives a fuck? - Show us your back.

- [Melissa] Who gives a fuck?

- Apparently you, because you just critiqued me for it.

- Okay, that's fine.

- Okay, it is fine. - Fuck it.

- The two people I think should be in the bottom

would have to be Melissa and Astrud,

just because I didn't really read a high school story

out of either of them.

- I wore a prom dress, at least.

- [Abhora] I mean, so did a lot of other people.

- [Astrud] Yeah, I know.

- I don't think that I should be picked out

just because I chose to go a different way.

- No, and I'm not gonna go by that.

Honestly, it's gonna be technical things.

A lot of thought has been put into this decision.

I think I've made up my mind,

and I think it's the right one.

I'm gonna keep it to myself.

I don't want anyone to feel-

- That's fair. - That's fair.

- [Evah] Totally fair.

- [Melissa] It's your decision, Victoria.

(tense music)

(ominous music)

(suspenseful music)

- Welcome back, Titans.

Victoria.

Please announce your decision.

(dramatic music)

- I didn't ask for all these responsibilities,

but a prom queen's gotta do what she's gotta do.

The two contestants that I believed

performed the weakest this week,

and two that I believe have been causing

the most drama and tension in the boudoir,

and hopefully this could fix that problem we are having.

The two I have chosen are

(suspenseful music)

Astrud,

and Abhora.

(dramatic music)

(Astrud chuckles)

- Okay.

I'm, yep, all right, cool.

So much for your fucking top three Victoria, god.

- I am so grateful.

I honestly thought I was gonna be up for elimination.

- I just know by the end of this,

someone's feelings are gonna get hurt.

- Astrud.

Abhora.

Please ascend the Staircase of Souls behind you

to the Ghostly Gallery,

where your final fate will be decided.

- I am a person with endless empathy, for better or worse,

but I am happy to be sending Abhora's ass home.

- As I get to the top of the Staircase of Souls,

I look to my friend, Astrud,

and all I can think is, I'm sorry.

This could be the last time I see any of these competitors,

but HoSo won't even look at me.

- I really went off of technicality,

but the drama in the boudoir is just a bonus.

(intense music)

- Abhora.

(horror music)

- [HoSo] Oh my god.

- You have been banished back to the Underworld.

(dramatic music)

(monsters crying)

- I'm in no way upset with Victoria.

I just wish I felt

more of a resolution before this happened.

- I don't think that it was necessarily her time,

but maybe for her own good right now,

with everything that's going on, I think it is.

- Astrud, you have been spared.

For you and the rest of your fellow competitors,

the battle of the Titans continues.

- Pleasant dreams, darlings.

(Boulet Brothers laugh)

(thunder booms)

(dramatic music)