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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 2 00:02:09,006 --> 00:02:10,507 Mind if I do a quick mop? 3 00:02:10,674 --> 00:02:12,009 You're shouting. 4 00:02:12,175 --> 00:02:13,176 What? 5 00:02:17,347 --> 00:02:19,182 - I can come back later. - No, it's fine. 6 00:02:20,017 --> 00:02:21,601 Just don't touch anything. 7 00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:25,397 "Just don't touch anything." 8 00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:26,523 Dickbreath. 9 00:02:28,692 --> 00:02:30,360 You want a Tic Tac? 10 00:02:32,446 --> 00:02:34,781 All right. I'll take that as a no. 11 00:02:50,547 --> 00:02:51,882 Oh. Come on. 12 00:03:18,283 --> 00:03:19,284 Oh... 13 00:03:20,827 --> 00:03:23,747 What the hell happened to you, dude? 14 00:03:32,255 --> 00:03:35,175 Dod? What the fuck kind of name is Dod? 15 00:03:36,051 --> 00:03:38,095 Oh! 16 00:03:43,183 --> 00:03:45,352 Go, go, go, go, go. 17 00:03:47,270 --> 00:03:48,522 Come on! 18 00:03:53,110 --> 00:03:55,529 No! Oh, no, no, no. Reset, reset. 19 00:03:56,113 --> 00:03:58,115 Oh, shit. Oh, shit. 20 00:03:58,448 --> 00:04:00,117 Dod! Come on! 21 00:04:01,451 --> 00:04:04,204 Clear! Accept! Accept the motherfucker! 22 00:04:04,788 --> 00:04:06,540 Shit. Okay. All right. 23 00:04:06,957 --> 00:04:07,958 Um... 24 00:04:08,959 --> 00:04:10,961 I'll do CPR. Yeah. 25 00:04:19,845 --> 00:04:23,181 All right! Some Takis Fuego. 26 00:04:27,185 --> 00:04:28,228 Come on! 27 00:04:30,313 --> 00:04:32,315 Come on, breathe, dude! 28 00:04:36,862 --> 00:04:39,197 Oh, shit! Oh, hell, no. 29 00:04:40,866 --> 00:04:42,909 Okay. All right. All right. Come on, Dod. 30 00:04:42,993 --> 00:04:44,286 Come on. We got this. 31 00:04:52,043 --> 00:04:53,837 Please, come on, Dod! 32 00:04:54,504 --> 00:04:55,505 One, one thousand! 33 00:04:55,839 --> 00:04:56,882 Two, one thousand! 34 00:04:57,966 --> 00:04:58,967 Ah! 35 00:05:20,197 --> 00:05:21,198 No, no, no! 36 00:05:22,407 --> 00:05:23,700 No, no, no! 37 00:05:26,870 --> 00:05:27,871 Come on. 38 00:05:31,082 --> 00:05:32,083 Ah! 39 00:05:51,561 --> 00:05:53,563 You are kidding me. 40 00:06:05,242 --> 00:06:06,743 Oh, crap. 41 00:06:22,592 --> 00:06:23,593 Why? 42 00:06:53,290 --> 00:06:54,890 You know what's cooler than cool? 43 00:06:55,125 --> 00:06:56,459 Scouting! 44 00:06:56,626 --> 00:06:57,627 Action! 45 00:06:57,794 --> 00:07:00,380 Hi, there, guys. My name is Scout Leader Rogers. 46 00:07:00,630 --> 00:07:04,551 And I'm here to show you what scouting is all about. Come... 47 00:07:04,801 --> 00:07:07,804 Being a Scout is about the bonds of friendship. 48 00:07:10,140 --> 00:07:11,140 Check it out! 49 00:07:11,182 --> 00:07:15,186 These Scouts are on their way to earning a Bow and Arrow Badge! 50 00:07:15,895 --> 00:07:19,649 Badges are the Scouts' highest symbol of achievement. 51 00:07:20,900 --> 00:07:23,486 Scouts can earn all sorts of badges. 52 00:07:25,322 --> 00:07:27,490 What's cooler than cool? 53 00:07:27,824 --> 00:07:29,492 Scouting! 54 00:07:31,995 --> 00:07:36,333 All right, are you in or are you in? 55 00:07:43,340 --> 00:07:45,180 Hey, listen, there's free cookies every Friday. 56 00:07:45,342 --> 00:07:47,844 We do sing-alongs on Saturdays. 57 00:07:48,178 --> 00:07:49,846 It looks great on a college application! 58 00:07:51,181 --> 00:07:53,433 I love this tragic ritual. 59 00:07:53,516 --> 00:07:55,769 Someone's gonna sign up, guys! 60 00:07:55,852 --> 00:07:57,020 We have to keep trying! 61 00:07:57,354 --> 00:07:59,648 Augie, a unicorn's gonna fly out of your ass 62 00:07:59,731 --> 00:08:01,024 before somebody joins. 63 00:08:01,107 --> 00:08:02,942 Carter! Language. 64 00:08:03,026 --> 00:08:04,402 Yeah, he's right. Nobody's ever gonna sign up. 65 00:08:04,486 --> 00:08:05,779 It's just a waste of time. 66 00:08:05,862 --> 00:08:08,406 Ye of little faith. Where's that Scout spirit? 67 00:08:08,865 --> 00:08:10,992 Look, guys, we're not gonna quit trying just because 68 00:08:11,076 --> 00:08:13,161 we lost a couple hours sitting around on our butts 69 00:08:13,244 --> 00:08:14,454 with nothing to show for it. 70 00:08:14,996 --> 00:08:17,082 I mean, some people spend their entire lives 71 00:08:17,165 --> 00:08:19,292 and have nothing to show for it. 72 00:08:22,087 --> 00:08:23,296 Well... 73 00:08:23,505 --> 00:08:25,924 I think we all know it's Augie's special night. 74 00:08:28,802 --> 00:08:31,346 After years of hard work and dedication, 75 00:08:31,429 --> 00:08:34,641 he will receive the highest honor of a Scout, 76 00:08:34,724 --> 00:08:36,059 the Condor Badge, 77 00:08:36,393 --> 00:08:38,395 in a ceremony at tonight's campout. 78 00:08:38,520 --> 00:08:40,563 Okay. Let's see. 79 00:08:40,647 --> 00:08:42,315 Latrine duty: Carter. 80 00:08:42,399 --> 00:08:44,192 No! No, no, no, no. I always dig the shitter. 81 00:08:44,275 --> 00:08:45,755 It's called a latrine, not a shitter. 82 00:08:46,444 --> 00:08:48,196 All right, Ben, you're on wiener duty. 83 00:08:48,405 --> 00:08:50,407 That's enough. 84 00:08:50,490 --> 00:08:53,326 Carter, nobody eats a hot dog like this. 85 00:08:55,245 --> 00:08:58,081 All right. Ben, why don't you lead us in the Scout Oath? 86 00:08:58,498 --> 00:09:00,041 - Come on. - All right. 87 00:09:02,585 --> 00:09:04,337 This do I swear: 88 00:09:04,754 --> 00:09:07,090 To live courageously, 89 00:09:07,173 --> 00:09:09,050 to help others when I can, 90 00:09:09,134 --> 00:09:12,846 defend what I must, so help me God. 91 00:09:12,929 --> 00:09:14,431 Scouts forever! 92 00:09:14,514 --> 00:09:15,849 Scouts forever! 93 00:09:16,099 --> 00:09:17,600 Scouts forever. 94 00:09:18,268 --> 00:09:19,686 Scouts forever. 95 00:09:19,853 --> 00:09:21,354 Forever! 96 00:09:25,942 --> 00:09:27,569 Ben, we have to tell Augie. 97 00:09:27,652 --> 00:09:29,028 - I know. I know. - We're ditching Scouts. 98 00:09:29,112 --> 00:09:30,155 Yeah, we'll tell him. 99 00:09:30,238 --> 00:09:31,364 We've been talking about it for over a year. 100 00:09:31,448 --> 00:09:33,199 I know. We just have to find the right time. 101 00:09:33,283 --> 00:09:34,784 Okay, we'll do it tonight, then. 102 00:09:34,868 --> 00:09:36,786 No, we can't tell him tonight. He's getting his Condor Badge. 103 00:09:37,036 --> 00:09:39,706 He's been working toward this ever since he joined Scouts. 104 00:09:39,873 --> 00:09:41,458 You know how much it means to him. 105 00:09:41,541 --> 00:09:44,377 Especially since his dad can't be there. 106 00:09:45,712 --> 00:09:47,255 It's been two years, Ben. 107 00:09:47,338 --> 00:09:50,800 We can't just stay in Scouts because we feel sorry for him. 108 00:09:50,884 --> 00:09:52,761 Come on, that's not the only reason we're staying in Scouts. 109 00:09:52,844 --> 00:09:53,887 Come on, you've had fun. 110 00:09:53,970 --> 00:09:56,765 Had fun, okay? Past tense. Had. 111 00:09:56,848 --> 00:09:59,642 And now I am ready to move on. I mean, you realize 112 00:09:59,726 --> 00:10:01,561 it's gonna be junior year next year. 113 00:10:01,644 --> 00:10:03,605 I mean, you know what that means, right? 114 00:10:03,688 --> 00:10:05,064 We start thinking about college. 115 00:10:05,148 --> 00:10:08,067 We start thinking about pussy, Ben! 116 00:10:08,151 --> 00:10:10,904 Come on. Junior year is when all the girls become sluts. 117 00:10:10,987 --> 00:10:11,988 - Oh, really? - Yes. 118 00:10:12,071 --> 00:10:14,991 And if we're sitting here in these Scout uniforms, 119 00:10:15,074 --> 00:10:17,327 it's gonna be the male version of a chastity belt, Ben. 120 00:10:22,916 --> 00:10:24,334 Oh, shit. Shit. 121 00:10:25,210 --> 00:10:26,711 What the fuck was that? 122 00:10:27,337 --> 00:10:29,422 Holy shit. Oh, my God. 123 00:10:34,761 --> 00:10:35,762 Oh, shit. 124 00:10:35,845 --> 00:10:37,806 Dude, that scared the shit out of me. 125 00:10:37,889 --> 00:10:39,432 Yeah, me, too. 126 00:10:39,516 --> 00:10:41,518 No, like, literally, a little shit came out. 127 00:10:41,601 --> 00:10:42,936 Dude, stop. 128 00:10:46,356 --> 00:10:48,358 Jesus Christ. You hood-fucked Bambi. 129 00:10:48,441 --> 00:10:50,276 I didn't mean to! It wasn't my fault, Carter! 130 00:10:50,360 --> 00:10:51,861 It was just standing there! 131 00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:05,542 Oh, shit. 132 00:11:05,708 --> 00:11:07,377 Oh. Damn it. 133 00:11:07,877 --> 00:11:10,129 Great. Just awesome. 134 00:11:11,381 --> 00:11:13,633 Is that a spare for your bike or the car? 135 00:11:13,716 --> 00:11:16,553 Shit. My dad's gonna be so pissed. 136 00:11:17,554 --> 00:11:18,888 Carter, where are the other lug nuts? 137 00:11:18,972 --> 00:11:20,807 How should I know? I've been sitting here doing nothing. 138 00:11:20,890 --> 00:11:22,225 Yeah. I noticed. 139 00:11:24,894 --> 00:11:26,646 Oh. Dude, that's my sister. 140 00:11:27,564 --> 00:11:29,148 Kendall! Kendall! 141 00:11:30,316 --> 00:11:31,484 Hey! 142 00:11:34,612 --> 00:11:35,613 Hey. 143 00:11:36,239 --> 00:11:38,157 Can you help us? 144 00:11:56,384 --> 00:11:57,385 - Catch! - Ow! 145 00:11:57,760 --> 00:11:58,845 - Jeff! - What? 146 00:11:58,928 --> 00:12:00,013 I said, "Catch." 147 00:12:00,096 --> 00:12:01,514 I thought he had it. 148 00:12:01,598 --> 00:12:03,850 - Sorry, bro. It's my bad. - Yeah. 149 00:12:03,933 --> 00:12:06,102 Are you guys okay? I mean, what happened? 150 00:12:06,185 --> 00:12:08,855 We hit a white-tailed deer. It was huge. 151 00:12:08,938 --> 00:12:10,773 Yeah. We were just driving, and then it was like, boom! 152 00:12:10,857 --> 00:12:13,192 You guys hit a deer? That's awesome. 153 00:12:13,276 --> 00:12:15,612 Nope, not awesome. Are you kidding? 154 00:12:15,695 --> 00:12:17,447 Nothing awesome about it. Look at my car. 155 00:12:20,783 --> 00:12:21,868 What's up, Chloe? 156 00:12:22,785 --> 00:12:24,370 - Hey... - Hey. 157 00:12:24,454 --> 00:12:26,039 - Carter. - Carter! 158 00:12:26,122 --> 00:12:28,708 Yeah. I sit behind you in Spanish class. 159 00:12:30,752 --> 00:12:31,753 Oh, gracias. 160 00:12:32,545 --> 00:12:34,464 So, I'm really down with this 161 00:12:34,589 --> 00:12:36,049 whole little Scout uniform you guys got going. 162 00:12:36,132 --> 00:12:37,342 All these little patches and stuff. 163 00:12:37,425 --> 00:12:40,094 Actually, Ben and Carter have been 164 00:12:40,178 --> 00:12:42,472 Scouts together since, what, you were like six, right? 165 00:12:42,555 --> 00:12:44,849 - Yeah, yeah. A long time. - That's awesome, man. 166 00:12:44,933 --> 00:12:46,559 Ben's like my little brother. 167 00:12:46,643 --> 00:12:48,478 Yep. That's me. Little brother Ben. 168 00:12:48,561 --> 00:12:49,896 Hey, Jeff! 169 00:12:50,813 --> 00:12:52,573 All right, well. Sorry about that face again. 170 00:12:54,984 --> 00:12:57,320 Hey, are you going to the party tonight? 171 00:12:57,403 --> 00:12:58,404 What's up? 172 00:12:58,488 --> 00:13:02,325 Yo! Aber-blow-me and Bitch, man. What's up? Hey. 173 00:13:02,408 --> 00:13:03,493 Always coming up with good ones. 174 00:13:03,576 --> 00:13:05,912 Listen, I was just talking to Carver here, and... 175 00:13:05,995 --> 00:13:07,080 Carter. 176 00:13:07,163 --> 00:13:09,290 - I came up with a great idea. - Really? 177 00:13:09,374 --> 00:13:10,583 Hit me. What do we have? 178 00:13:10,667 --> 00:13:12,335 How'd recruiting go? 179 00:13:12,418 --> 00:13:15,588 Oh, the usual. Yeah, no one joined. 180 00:13:15,672 --> 00:13:17,090 I think it's just a big joke at this point. 181 00:13:17,173 --> 00:13:18,257 It's not a joke. 182 00:13:18,341 --> 00:13:20,927 I think it's really cool you guys have stuck with Scouts. 183 00:13:21,010 --> 00:13:23,221 One day you're gonna look back on this 184 00:13:23,304 --> 00:13:25,181 and you're gonna be really happy you did it. 185 00:13:26,349 --> 00:13:28,017 Okay. Thanks. 186 00:13:32,355 --> 00:13:35,441 Looks like the deer made out better than your car. 187 00:13:35,525 --> 00:13:37,777 Yeah. Wait, what? What do you mean? 188 00:13:38,486 --> 00:13:39,988 Well, where is it? 189 00:13:40,071 --> 00:13:41,739 It's right over there. 190 00:14:09,559 --> 00:14:11,644 Holy shit! Holy shit, man! 191 00:14:11,728 --> 00:14:13,229 You dick. What's wrong with you? 192 00:14:13,312 --> 00:14:15,815 Dude. Dude, okay. You're never gonna believe what happened. 193 00:14:15,898 --> 00:14:17,498 Hey, you sure you guys don't need a ride? 194 00:14:18,276 --> 00:14:19,694 No, we're good. 195 00:14:19,777 --> 00:14:20,820 See you boys tonight. 196 00:14:20,903 --> 00:14:22,739 Hey! See you tonight, man! 197 00:14:22,822 --> 00:14:24,991 All right? All right? 198 00:14:26,743 --> 00:14:29,078 Bye, Chloe! Bye! 199 00:14:30,246 --> 00:14:31,686 What are you talking about, tonight? 200 00:14:31,748 --> 00:14:33,499 Dude, you are never going to guess what happened. 201 00:14:33,583 --> 00:14:36,627 We got invited to the secret senior party, man. Look. 202 00:14:37,170 --> 00:14:39,422 Who cares? Look, the deer is gone. What about the deer? 203 00:14:39,505 --> 00:14:40,757 Dude, fuck deers, man! 204 00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:44,177 We are going to the secret party, man! Come on! 205 00:14:44,260 --> 00:14:46,345 I'm gonna fuck Chloe. 206 00:14:46,429 --> 00:14:48,598 I'm gonna fuck Chloe. 207 00:14:53,770 --> 00:14:55,438 Ben, come on. This is the chance of a lifetime. 208 00:14:55,521 --> 00:14:57,315 Okay. I mean, quit acting like you don't want to go. 209 00:14:57,398 --> 00:14:58,858 Of course I want to go. I do. 210 00:14:58,941 --> 00:15:02,361 But it's Augie's big night. He's getting his Condor Badge. 211 00:15:02,445 --> 00:15:04,530 We can't miss the ceremony or he'd never forgive us. 212 00:15:04,614 --> 00:15:06,699 Okay, look, hear me out. 213 00:15:06,783 --> 00:15:08,409 We go to the campout, 214 00:15:08,493 --> 00:15:10,495 and when Augie and Rogers fall asleep, 215 00:15:10,578 --> 00:15:12,288 we will sneak out and go to the party. 216 00:15:12,371 --> 00:15:13,372 Carter... 217 00:15:13,456 --> 00:15:14,496 We'll be back before dawn, 218 00:15:14,540 --> 00:15:16,334 it'll be like we never even left. 219 00:15:17,043 --> 00:15:19,087 I don't know. It just sounds... 220 00:15:19,170 --> 00:15:20,171 Ben. 221 00:15:21,380 --> 00:15:23,800 This could be the night of our lives. 222 00:15:24,717 --> 00:15:26,052 Please. 223 00:15:28,137 --> 00:15:30,473 All right. I mean, I guess we could try. 224 00:15:32,475 --> 00:15:34,018 - Okay. - I love you. 225 00:15:34,102 --> 00:15:36,229 You're amazing. Thank you! 226 00:15:36,312 --> 00:15:37,647 Whoa! What the hell? 227 00:15:38,314 --> 00:15:39,816 Hi, Mrs. Fielder. Hi. 228 00:15:40,983 --> 00:15:44,904 Your garbage cans were blocking my driveway again. 229 00:15:45,404 --> 00:15:47,240 Had to move them myself, 230 00:15:47,323 --> 00:15:50,576 which is no easy task with a herniated disk. 231 00:15:50,660 --> 00:15:51,661 Okay, great. 232 00:15:51,744 --> 00:15:56,249 You tell your father to keep his trash on his side of the property. 233 00:15:56,833 --> 00:15:59,627 Okay, we'll do that, Mrs. Fielder. Thank you. 234 00:15:59,710 --> 00:16:03,589 All right, thanks. Yep. Can you just move right there? 235 00:16:03,673 --> 00:16:05,508 Thank you. Bye! 236 00:16:05,925 --> 00:16:07,343 Jesus Christ. 237 00:16:07,760 --> 00:16:09,679 You old hag! Okay. Thank you. 238 00:16:09,762 --> 00:16:11,097 She is so annoying. 239 00:16:11,514 --> 00:16:14,684 Oh, my God. Can you imagine living next to that? 240 00:16:14,767 --> 00:16:17,895 Oh, my God. Dude, how many cats does she have? 241 00:16:17,979 --> 00:16:20,481 Dude, who knows. She probably rubs Fancy Feast on her cooch 242 00:16:20,565 --> 00:16:21,941 and lets them all go to town. 243 00:16:22,024 --> 00:16:23,025 What? 244 00:16:23,109 --> 00:16:26,571 Meet me here at 5:30 and then we'll go to Camp Womp Womp. 245 00:16:26,654 --> 00:16:28,781 Then we'll go to the party. All right? 246 00:16:28,865 --> 00:16:30,449 - All right? All right. - All right. 247 00:16:30,533 --> 00:16:31,617 See you soon, man. 248 00:16:31,701 --> 00:16:32,702 All right. See ya. 249 00:16:42,628 --> 00:16:44,046 Oh, litterbugs. 250 00:16:44,338 --> 00:16:45,339 Come on. 251 00:16:49,135 --> 00:16:50,469 Biotine? 252 00:16:52,388 --> 00:16:54,223 How'd you get way out here? 253 00:16:55,057 --> 00:16:57,560 Well, Peter Morris, finders keepers. 254 00:17:03,482 --> 00:17:04,734 Hello? 255 00:17:10,406 --> 00:17:11,574 Hello? 256 00:17:36,015 --> 00:17:37,600 What's wrong with you? 257 00:17:38,226 --> 00:17:39,560 You A-wipe! 258 00:17:40,019 --> 00:17:42,355 C-word! All the other words! 259 00:17:43,773 --> 00:17:45,274 Oh, doodle! 260 00:17:45,566 --> 00:17:46,901 That's my lucky knife! 261 00:18:03,542 --> 00:18:06,379 Teach you to mess with Scout Leader Rogers! 262 00:18:20,726 --> 00:18:22,353 So we're just gonna walk in there like this. 263 00:18:22,436 --> 00:18:24,355 No I.D.'s, just buy some beer? 264 00:18:24,438 --> 00:18:25,940 Just give me the $20, fool. Come on. 265 00:18:26,565 --> 00:18:27,900 Cough it up. 266 00:18:28,609 --> 00:18:29,944 Any day now. Come on. 267 00:18:30,027 --> 00:18:31,779 Hang on. It's Velcro. It takes a second. 268 00:18:32,488 --> 00:18:33,906 Watch a pro. 269 00:18:38,077 --> 00:18:40,121 Hi, sir. How are you today? 270 00:18:40,204 --> 00:18:41,372 Hey, baby. 271 00:18:42,665 --> 00:18:44,333 Oh, nice. Great plan, Carter. 272 00:18:44,417 --> 00:18:47,253 Just give the money to a drunk bum. That'll work. 273 00:18:49,171 --> 00:18:50,172 Yeah! 274 00:18:50,256 --> 00:18:52,008 Just the cheap stuff. 275 00:18:59,348 --> 00:19:00,808 Did you see Officer Hottie? 276 00:19:00,891 --> 00:19:03,227 No. I was too busy watching you lose 20 bucks. 277 00:19:03,311 --> 00:19:04,854 Okay, I gave him very specific instructions. 278 00:19:04,937 --> 00:19:06,647 He's gonna buy us a couple of six packs, 279 00:19:06,731 --> 00:19:08,441 and he can keep the change. 280 00:19:08,941 --> 00:19:10,026 Jesus. 281 00:19:11,277 --> 00:19:12,278 Whoa. 282 00:19:13,863 --> 00:19:15,323 Holy shit, dude. That's her. 283 00:19:15,406 --> 00:19:17,033 What? Who? 284 00:19:17,116 --> 00:19:19,035 It's Denise What's-her-face. 285 00:19:19,118 --> 00:19:20,244 She went to our high school. 286 00:19:20,328 --> 00:19:21,728 She dropped out a couple years ago. 287 00:19:22,830 --> 00:19:24,081 Now she's a stripper. 288 00:19:24,165 --> 00:19:25,291 How do you even know that? 289 00:19:25,374 --> 00:19:26,709 She's a legend. 290 00:19:27,710 --> 00:19:31,047 What the fuck is he... Jesus Christ. 291 00:19:34,133 --> 00:19:35,384 Sir! 292 00:19:37,553 --> 00:19:39,889 I'm not paying for these items. 293 00:19:40,723 --> 00:19:41,891 Sir? 294 00:19:45,061 --> 00:19:46,395 - Shit! - Oh, uh... 295 00:19:47,563 --> 00:19:50,566 It's okay. I got it. Seriously, I got it. 296 00:19:53,402 --> 00:19:55,488 Fucking ghetto-ass bag. 297 00:19:55,571 --> 00:19:56,739 Here. 298 00:19:57,907 --> 00:19:59,909 What are you doing? 299 00:19:59,992 --> 00:20:02,620 It's a sheet bend knot. 300 00:20:02,703 --> 00:20:03,788 It's impossible to break. 301 00:20:03,871 --> 00:20:04,872 You're pretty handy. 302 00:20:05,581 --> 00:20:06,749 Thanks. 303 00:20:06,832 --> 00:20:07,833 Get out. 304 00:20:07,917 --> 00:20:09,251 - Nice legs. - Huh? 305 00:20:10,086 --> 00:20:11,837 Costume party? 306 00:20:11,921 --> 00:20:13,422 Oh, no, I'm... 307 00:20:13,839 --> 00:20:15,257 I'm a Scout. 308 00:20:15,341 --> 00:20:16,759 Like an actual Scout? 309 00:20:16,842 --> 00:20:18,322 Yeah, well. We got a campout tonight. 310 00:20:18,761 --> 00:20:21,597 So you work across the street? 311 00:20:21,680 --> 00:20:24,016 Yep. Glamorous, huh? 312 00:20:24,100 --> 00:20:26,435 Yeah. I mean, I've never been in, 313 00:20:26,519 --> 00:20:28,270 but I hear it's nice. 314 00:20:29,271 --> 00:20:30,439 It's got a good Yelp review. 315 00:20:31,774 --> 00:20:33,025 - What? - Nothing. 316 00:20:33,109 --> 00:20:34,469 You're just... You're really cute. 317 00:20:35,528 --> 00:20:36,612 Thanks. 318 00:20:37,613 --> 00:20:38,697 Come on, Carter. 319 00:20:38,781 --> 00:20:41,200 Please tell me you did not ask that guy to buy you beer. 320 00:20:41,283 --> 00:20:42,284 No, it was his idea. 321 00:20:42,368 --> 00:20:43,619 Rookies. 322 00:20:44,370 --> 00:20:45,371 Where are you... 323 00:20:45,454 --> 00:20:46,747 I need my $20 back. 324 00:20:46,831 --> 00:20:48,666 It's not all yours. 325 00:20:50,793 --> 00:20:52,128 You're dirty. Look how dirty... 326 00:20:57,633 --> 00:20:58,884 Here. 327 00:20:58,968 --> 00:21:00,344 Thank you. 328 00:21:04,390 --> 00:21:06,475 Thank you. Here. 329 00:21:06,976 --> 00:21:08,310 Oh, my God. Thank you. 330 00:21:08,394 --> 00:21:10,646 You're the most amazing person ever. Thank you. 331 00:21:10,729 --> 00:21:11,981 Yeah. Thanks. 332 00:21:12,064 --> 00:21:14,442 It's cool. And thanks for the help, Legs. 333 00:21:14,525 --> 00:21:15,526 Yeah. 334 00:21:16,485 --> 00:21:18,571 Dude, what the fuck was that? 335 00:21:18,654 --> 00:21:19,864 Oh, my God. 336 00:21:19,947 --> 00:21:22,825 I would tongue-pound her salty walrus any day of the week. 337 00:21:24,034 --> 00:21:25,077 Oh, shit. 338 00:21:25,161 --> 00:21:26,745 - He's staring at us. - Go. 339 00:21:30,833 --> 00:21:33,433 Dude, I thought you said that Kendall broke up with that Jeff guy. 340 00:21:33,586 --> 00:21:35,171 Dude, I thought so too. 341 00:21:35,254 --> 00:21:36,922 It's like, one moment, they're together 342 00:21:37,006 --> 00:21:39,425 and the next moment, they're broken up. 343 00:21:39,508 --> 00:21:40,843 So he's a dick. 344 00:21:46,849 --> 00:21:48,601 It's like no doubt... 345 00:21:48,684 --> 00:21:49,810 Hey, guys! 346 00:21:49,894 --> 00:21:50,936 Hey, what's up? 347 00:21:51,020 --> 00:21:53,355 All right. Campsite is halfway set up. 348 00:21:53,439 --> 00:21:54,440 - Nice. - Great. 349 00:21:54,523 --> 00:21:55,941 - What's up? - What's up? 350 00:21:56,025 --> 00:21:57,151 What's up? 351 00:21:57,234 --> 00:21:59,028 Oh! Too slow. Too slow, buddy. 352 00:21:59,111 --> 00:22:00,321 Where's Scout Leader Rogers? 353 00:22:00,404 --> 00:22:01,780 He was supposed to be here to help me set up, 354 00:22:01,864 --> 00:22:03,032 but so far he's a no-show. 355 00:22:04,033 --> 00:22:06,118 That's weird. He's never late. 356 00:22:06,202 --> 00:22:08,287 Yeah. Maybe he quit Scouts. 357 00:22:08,454 --> 00:22:11,790 Quit Scouts? Yeah, right. 358 00:22:11,874 --> 00:22:13,375 That's hysterical! 359 00:22:13,459 --> 00:22:15,461 Want to know what I think it is? I think it's a test. 360 00:22:15,544 --> 00:22:16,629 A test? 361 00:22:16,712 --> 00:22:18,672 Well, yeah. I'm getting my Condor Badge today. 362 00:22:18,756 --> 00:22:20,633 I have to prove that I'm ready. 363 00:22:21,050 --> 00:22:22,051 Yeah, and check this out. 364 00:22:22,134 --> 00:22:23,894 I'm charting diets for the Animal Study Badge 365 00:22:23,969 --> 00:22:25,221 and I walked right into that. 366 00:22:25,554 --> 00:22:27,139 - What is this? - It's deer scat. 367 00:22:28,557 --> 00:22:30,893 Oh, dude! What the fuck, man? 368 00:22:31,227 --> 00:22:32,645 Carter! I needed that! 369 00:22:32,728 --> 00:22:34,480 You needed that? It's shit, Augie! 370 00:22:34,563 --> 00:22:36,148 No one needs shit! 371 00:22:36,232 --> 00:22:37,900 I need it! I've been looking all week for it. 372 00:22:37,983 --> 00:22:39,944 Oh, God. It's gonna be a long night. 373 00:22:41,946 --> 00:22:43,739 Just feeding it through, in and out. 374 00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:45,241 Oh, yeah. 375 00:22:45,574 --> 00:22:47,076 There you go. 376 00:22:47,159 --> 00:22:49,328 - Good job, bud. - I did it! 377 00:23:26,782 --> 00:23:28,867 What the fuck, man? Was that your ass? 378 00:23:57,980 --> 00:24:00,357 Beans? Weenies? 379 00:24:00,441 --> 00:24:02,401 Why do we always have to eat welfare food? 380 00:24:02,484 --> 00:24:04,278 Because we're camping, Carter. What do you want? 381 00:24:04,361 --> 00:24:06,405 Something artisan. Something that doesn't make me 382 00:24:06,488 --> 00:24:08,073 fart every five seconds. 383 00:24:08,157 --> 00:24:09,491 Shut up. Quit being such a bitch. 384 00:24:11,160 --> 00:24:12,328 Augie? Augie? 385 00:24:12,661 --> 00:24:14,330 Hey, Augie! 386 00:24:14,413 --> 00:24:15,414 Use my lighter. 387 00:24:15,497 --> 00:24:18,042 I'm not gonna get my Fire Making Badge using a lighter, Carter. 388 00:24:18,125 --> 00:24:19,251 - Just use it. - No! 389 00:24:19,335 --> 00:24:20,919 - Why? - 'Cause! 390 00:24:21,003 --> 00:24:22,004 Augie. 391 00:24:23,339 --> 00:24:26,342 Augie, just use it. You can get it next time. 392 00:24:30,012 --> 00:24:33,098 What the fuck? Why the hell can't I get service? 393 00:24:33,182 --> 00:24:34,350 Carter, we're in the woods. 394 00:24:34,433 --> 00:24:35,976 I always get service up here. 395 00:24:36,060 --> 00:24:37,269 Maybe Mother Nature wants you 396 00:24:37,353 --> 00:24:39,772 to put the phone away, Carter, and be in the moment. 397 00:24:39,855 --> 00:24:42,441 Oh, is that what Mother Nature wants? 398 00:24:42,524 --> 00:24:44,193 Maybe Mother Nature wants this. 399 00:24:48,364 --> 00:24:50,115 Fucking bull's-eye, man! 400 00:24:50,199 --> 00:24:51,950 You're an asshead, Carter. 401 00:24:52,034 --> 00:24:54,328 Wait! No, no, no, no! Don't take it off. 402 00:24:54,411 --> 00:24:56,205 Here we go. Wait. Hold still. 403 00:24:56,288 --> 00:24:59,291 Hold still. Ready? Say, "marshmallow." 404 00:24:59,708 --> 00:25:01,710 Carter sucks donkey balls. 405 00:25:03,087 --> 00:25:04,129 Wow. 406 00:25:04,213 --> 00:25:05,964 That's a thing of beauty. 407 00:25:06,048 --> 00:25:07,633 You better not post that. 408 00:25:07,716 --> 00:25:09,636 I'm definitely posting that. It's my masterpiece. 409 00:25:10,302 --> 00:25:12,554 All right. BRB, guys. I got to pee. 410 00:25:17,393 --> 00:25:18,435 Barn owl? 411 00:25:19,228 --> 00:25:20,813 I think it's a spotted owl. 412 00:25:21,647 --> 00:25:23,232 Yeah, you're probably right. 413 00:25:23,857 --> 00:25:24,858 Hey. 414 00:25:24,942 --> 00:25:28,654 Guess what I found when I was hiking up here? 415 00:25:28,737 --> 00:25:30,614 I found the tree we carved our initials into. 416 00:25:30,698 --> 00:25:31,907 - No way! - Yeah. 417 00:25:31,990 --> 00:25:32,991 - Really? - Yeah. 418 00:25:33,075 --> 00:25:34,827 Wow. That was like seven years ago. 419 00:25:34,910 --> 00:25:37,162 I know. Crazy, right? 420 00:25:37,246 --> 00:25:39,039 Oh. That was the same day Carter sat on the cactus 421 00:25:39,123 --> 00:25:40,999 when he was taking a shit, right? 422 00:25:42,501 --> 00:25:44,541 And your dad had to pick out the needles. 423 00:25:46,088 --> 00:25:47,172 Yeah. 424 00:25:56,014 --> 00:25:58,267 Augie, I know we don't talk about your dad much, 425 00:25:59,935 --> 00:26:02,020 but it's okay if you want to. 426 00:26:04,022 --> 00:26:06,191 I just don't want to be a downer, you know. 427 00:26:06,275 --> 00:26:07,776 Come on, Augie, you're not being a downer. 428 00:26:07,860 --> 00:26:09,027 He was your dad. 429 00:26:09,445 --> 00:26:11,113 You can talk about him. 430 00:26:13,115 --> 00:26:14,116 Thanks, Ben. 431 00:26:14,616 --> 00:26:16,452 Yeah. Of course. 432 00:26:18,787 --> 00:26:19,788 Hey. 433 00:26:21,457 --> 00:26:22,499 Scouts forever? 434 00:26:24,126 --> 00:26:26,128 Yeah. Scouts forever. 435 00:26:40,976 --> 00:26:42,394 Ben. Hey. 436 00:26:42,686 --> 00:26:43,729 Come on, Ben. Let's go. 437 00:26:43,812 --> 00:26:45,230 Carter, I don't know about this. 438 00:26:45,314 --> 00:26:46,690 Will you stop crying about this? 439 00:26:46,774 --> 00:26:48,734 Let's go. Come on, we're doing this. 440 00:26:48,817 --> 00:26:51,069 Let's go. Come on. 441 00:26:51,153 --> 00:26:52,196 Come on. 442 00:27:41,036 --> 00:27:42,454 Are we interrupting? 443 00:27:45,874 --> 00:27:46,959 You look amazing. 444 00:27:47,042 --> 00:27:48,043 Thank you. 445 00:27:48,168 --> 00:27:49,378 Hey, have you guys seen my brother? 446 00:27:49,461 --> 00:27:50,963 He should have been here by now. 447 00:27:51,547 --> 00:27:53,799 No. I haven't seen him anywhere, no. 448 00:27:54,216 --> 00:27:56,176 But look, I'm sure he'll be here any second. Okay? 449 00:27:59,054 --> 00:28:01,557 Dude. What if Augie wakes up and we're not there? 450 00:28:01,640 --> 00:28:02,808 He's not gonna wake up. 451 00:28:02,891 --> 00:28:05,060 If Chewbacca was fucking Bigfoot in our campsite, 452 00:28:05,143 --> 00:28:06,895 he'd still be asleep. 453 00:28:07,104 --> 00:28:08,105 Whoa. 454 00:28:08,397 --> 00:28:10,232 - What is that? - What? 455 00:28:11,942 --> 00:28:13,735 Look. Look, he was here. 456 00:28:13,819 --> 00:28:16,029 Okay. So, he decided to go back home. 457 00:28:16,113 --> 00:28:17,114 He changed his mind. 458 00:28:17,197 --> 00:28:20,075 No, no, no. Scout Leader Rogers would never leave his lucky knife. 459 00:28:20,158 --> 00:28:21,410 I think something's wrong. 460 00:28:21,493 --> 00:28:24,121 Dude, what's wrong is us sitting here talking about this. 461 00:28:24,204 --> 00:28:25,455 Give me that. 462 00:28:26,164 --> 00:28:27,666 Dude, look. Look at his prints. 463 00:28:27,749 --> 00:28:30,085 His foot was dragging like he had a limp or something. 464 00:28:30,168 --> 00:28:32,754 Okay. Hurray for your mad tracking skills. 465 00:28:32,838 --> 00:28:35,007 Can we just... Can we go? Please? 466 00:28:43,807 --> 00:28:44,808 What? 467 00:28:44,892 --> 00:28:46,268 I just think something really bad happened to him. 468 00:28:46,351 --> 00:28:48,604 - Are we still talking about Rogers? - Yeah. 469 00:28:48,687 --> 00:28:50,939 Dude, he is sitting at home dressed up like Dolly Parton 470 00:28:51,023 --> 00:28:52,691 singing show tunes. Relax. 471 00:28:57,112 --> 00:28:58,447 Oh, shit. 472 00:29:00,616 --> 00:29:02,618 Augie, wait! Augie! 473 00:29:02,701 --> 00:29:03,869 Augie! 474 00:29:05,787 --> 00:29:07,027 I thought we were best friends. 475 00:29:07,080 --> 00:29:08,165 We are best friends. 476 00:29:08,248 --> 00:29:10,125 - We were coming back. - Really? 477 00:29:10,208 --> 00:29:11,668 After your party? 478 00:29:12,878 --> 00:29:14,379 You know about that? 479 00:29:14,463 --> 00:29:15,839 Everybody knows about the senior party, Carter. 480 00:29:15,923 --> 00:29:17,215 Even a loser like me. 481 00:29:17,299 --> 00:29:18,342 Augie, don't say that. 482 00:29:18,425 --> 00:29:19,718 Why not? It's what you guys think! 483 00:29:19,801 --> 00:29:21,386 We don't think you're a loser. 484 00:29:21,470 --> 00:29:23,221 Ben, just tell him. 485 00:29:23,305 --> 00:29:24,306 Carter, no. 486 00:29:24,389 --> 00:29:25,974 Yeah, tell me, Ben. 487 00:29:26,391 --> 00:29:28,226 Come on! Say it! 488 00:29:28,310 --> 00:29:29,790 We're quitting Scouts, Augie. 489 00:29:32,981 --> 00:29:35,525 Look, it was fun when we were kids. 490 00:29:37,319 --> 00:29:40,864 But we have to grow up, man. 491 00:29:42,157 --> 00:29:44,743 Augie. We're still gonna be best friends. 492 00:29:47,412 --> 00:29:48,830 Go to your party. 493 00:29:50,749 --> 00:29:52,000 Augie. 494 00:29:52,501 --> 00:29:53,627 Augie, wait! 495 00:29:54,503 --> 00:29:56,171 Augie, come on! 496 00:29:59,675 --> 00:30:01,343 Just leave him, Ben. 497 00:30:14,690 --> 00:30:17,275 What the fuck... What's wrong with the radio? 498 00:30:17,359 --> 00:30:18,610 Carter, are you seeing this? 499 00:30:18,694 --> 00:30:19,778 Seeing what? 500 00:30:19,861 --> 00:30:22,197 Look. The town's deserted. 501 00:30:23,865 --> 00:30:25,367 Everyone's probably asleep. 502 00:30:25,450 --> 00:30:26,868 On a Friday night? 503 00:30:27,786 --> 00:30:30,956 I don't know. Something just feels really weird. 504 00:30:31,039 --> 00:30:32,457 Oh, hey. Pull over right here. 505 00:30:37,546 --> 00:30:40,382 I can't wait to get out of these stupid uniforms. 506 00:30:40,966 --> 00:30:42,384 All right. Let's see here. 507 00:30:43,385 --> 00:30:45,971 We're just gonna change right here? 508 00:30:46,054 --> 00:30:47,389 Nobody's around. 509 00:30:48,223 --> 00:30:51,643 Let's see. Jeans. T-shirt. 510 00:30:51,727 --> 00:30:54,730 Condoms. Good to go. Uh... 511 00:30:55,397 --> 00:30:57,816 Forget socks? Yes, I did. 512 00:31:04,573 --> 00:31:06,324 - Holy shitballs! - What? 513 00:31:06,408 --> 00:31:07,576 Dude, look. 514 00:31:07,659 --> 00:31:08,744 What? 515 00:31:08,827 --> 00:31:10,203 The bouncer, he's gone! 516 00:31:10,912 --> 00:31:12,330 Carter, someone smashed the door. 517 00:31:12,414 --> 00:31:13,665 We should sneak in. 518 00:31:13,749 --> 00:31:15,584 - That's illegal. - Let's sneak in. Come on. Let's do it. 519 00:31:15,667 --> 00:31:16,827 Carter, we can't go in there! 520 00:31:16,877 --> 00:31:17,919 Come on! 521 00:31:18,003 --> 00:31:19,171 We can't go in there. We're minors. 522 00:31:19,254 --> 00:31:20,505 It's the chance of a lifetime. Who cares? 523 00:31:20,589 --> 00:31:21,631 What are you doing? 524 00:31:21,715 --> 00:31:23,175 It's gonna be awesome! 525 00:31:23,258 --> 00:31:25,427 Oh, my God. Wait, wait, wait. 526 00:31:26,845 --> 00:31:29,848 Okay, it's clear. Come on. Let's do it. 527 00:31:32,517 --> 00:31:34,436 Sweet Jesus. 528 00:31:35,103 --> 00:31:36,938 This is it, Ben. 529 00:31:37,022 --> 00:31:38,398 We've made it. 530 00:31:38,482 --> 00:31:40,358 We're at the epicenter of pussy. 531 00:31:41,610 --> 00:31:43,695 Oh, shit. I got to go to the ATM, get some cash. 532 00:31:43,779 --> 00:31:45,447 You find us a spot. 533 00:31:46,114 --> 00:31:49,701 Yeah. That shouldn't be too hard since there's, like, nobody here. 534 00:33:23,128 --> 00:33:24,754 Hey! 535 00:33:24,880 --> 00:33:27,883 My friend brought me here. He's getting money. 536 00:33:29,718 --> 00:33:32,304 I have a girlfriend, sort of. 537 00:33:33,555 --> 00:33:35,557 Don't worry, Mommy, Daddy's here! 538 00:33:37,475 --> 00:33:39,811 Dude, this is fucking awesome! 539 00:33:39,895 --> 00:33:41,146 Dude, something's wrong with her. 540 00:33:41,229 --> 00:33:43,690 Look at her chest. What's all over her? 541 00:33:43,773 --> 00:33:46,735 No, no. That's makeup, dummy. It's a jungle theme. 542 00:33:48,445 --> 00:33:49,446 Oh, wow. 543 00:33:49,571 --> 00:33:51,323 This is so hot. 544 00:33:53,241 --> 00:33:54,409 Oh, my God. 545 00:33:55,076 --> 00:33:56,161 Oh, my God. 546 00:33:58,914 --> 00:34:00,665 Oh, my God! 547 00:34:06,338 --> 00:34:07,839 Run! Quick, run! 548 00:34:09,174 --> 00:34:11,259 Door, door, door, door! 549 00:35:27,168 --> 00:35:28,169 Ugh! 550 00:35:52,444 --> 00:35:54,362 Get up! Get up! Get up! 551 00:35:58,533 --> 00:36:00,785 - Carter! - Ben? Ben. 552 00:36:02,120 --> 00:36:03,371 What the fuck is going on? 553 00:36:03,455 --> 00:36:04,622 I don't know! They're trying to kill us! 554 00:36:04,706 --> 00:36:06,875 - I just wanted to see some titties! - I know! 555 00:36:07,375 --> 00:36:09,294 Wait. You're the stripper. 556 00:36:10,253 --> 00:36:11,588 Cocktail waitress. 557 00:36:28,229 --> 00:36:30,065 Scout Leader Rogers? 558 00:36:37,072 --> 00:36:39,240 Scout Leader Rogers, are you home? 559 00:36:49,250 --> 00:36:50,835 Hello? 560 00:37:11,106 --> 00:37:12,857 Holy cow. 561 00:37:17,821 --> 00:37:19,280 Calm the fuck down! 562 00:37:19,364 --> 00:37:21,564 Calm down? Are you crazy? We almost got killed in there! 563 00:37:21,616 --> 00:37:22,867 - Is that your ride? - Can you please just tell us 564 00:37:22,951 --> 00:37:24,035 what the hell is going on? 565 00:37:24,119 --> 00:37:25,453 I really need to wash up my face right now! 566 00:37:25,537 --> 00:37:26,579 Keys, now! 567 00:37:26,663 --> 00:37:27,705 No! Not until you tell us what's happening. 568 00:37:27,789 --> 00:37:28,957 Anybody got a wet nap? 569 00:37:29,082 --> 00:37:30,208 What the fuck do you think is happening? 570 00:37:30,291 --> 00:37:31,376 Everyone's eating each other! 571 00:37:31,459 --> 00:37:33,253 - Wait, like a... - Yes, like that! 572 00:37:33,336 --> 00:37:34,337 That's not possible. 573 00:37:34,421 --> 00:37:35,422 I think it's possible, Ben. 574 00:37:35,505 --> 00:37:38,216 A dead stripper just tried to eat my face! 575 00:37:38,341 --> 00:37:39,509 Oh, shit! 576 00:37:40,051 --> 00:37:41,553 Oh, fuck. Oh, shit. 577 00:37:42,053 --> 00:37:43,388 Just shoot it! Shoot it! 578 00:37:51,396 --> 00:37:52,730 Yep. Zombie. 579 00:37:57,485 --> 00:37:59,154 Any more questions? 580 00:38:08,830 --> 00:38:10,498 Drive, dude, go! Come on! 581 00:38:13,418 --> 00:38:15,086 Where are you going? What the fuck? 582 00:38:21,843 --> 00:38:22,844 Oh, shit! 583 00:38:25,180 --> 00:38:27,015 Carter, get the tire! 584 00:38:32,228 --> 00:38:33,396 I got it. 585 00:38:33,480 --> 00:38:35,982 Guys, hurry up! They're getting pretty fucking close! 586 00:38:37,484 --> 00:38:39,652 - Come on! - I'm going as fast as I can. 587 00:38:39,736 --> 00:38:40,945 Find the fucking lug nuts. 588 00:38:43,531 --> 00:38:44,532 Fuck. 589 00:38:47,202 --> 00:38:48,953 Seriously, hurry the fuck up! 590 00:38:49,037 --> 00:38:50,705 I got them! Here. Here. 591 00:38:51,039 --> 00:38:52,540 Put it on! 592 00:38:52,874 --> 00:38:54,542 Okay. Good. Put it on! Put it on! 593 00:38:54,792 --> 00:38:55,793 Fuck! 594 00:39:02,050 --> 00:39:03,051 I got it! 595 00:39:07,222 --> 00:39:08,306 Oh, shit! 596 00:39:08,389 --> 00:39:10,391 You got to be fucking kidding me. 597 00:39:16,231 --> 00:39:17,357 Go! Go! Go! 598 00:40:53,244 --> 00:40:55,204 Scout Leader Rogers! What happened tonight? 599 00:40:55,288 --> 00:40:56,998 We were worried about you. 600 00:40:58,416 --> 00:41:02,420 I know. It's bad. I'm so sorry. I had to use your bathroom. 601 00:41:02,503 --> 00:41:04,088 I think it was the beans. 602 00:41:05,006 --> 00:41:06,841 And the marshmallows. 603 00:41:08,176 --> 00:41:11,012 I tried spraying. It just lingers. 604 00:41:20,772 --> 00:41:21,814 Your neck! 605 00:41:24,359 --> 00:41:26,027 Scout Leader Rogers! Please! 606 00:41:30,239 --> 00:41:32,559 I think you're having a bad allergic reaction to something! 607 00:41:32,617 --> 00:41:34,827 We need to get you to a doctor! 608 00:43:11,132 --> 00:43:13,176 "All evacuation buses have departed. 609 00:43:13,259 --> 00:43:14,594 "Proceed north on Route 1 610 00:43:14,677 --> 00:43:17,054 "to the security checkpoint at mile marker 17." 611 00:43:17,138 --> 00:43:19,474 Oh, shit. They evacuated the town. 612 00:43:19,557 --> 00:43:20,558 That's great. 613 00:43:20,641 --> 00:43:22,201 I missed the party, and I missed Chloe, 614 00:43:22,268 --> 00:43:24,395 - and now I'm gonna die. - Guys. 615 00:43:24,479 --> 00:43:25,563 Carter, calm down! We need to figure out 616 00:43:25,646 --> 00:43:27,190 - what we're gonna do. - Guys! 617 00:43:33,488 --> 00:43:34,572 Come on. 618 00:43:37,825 --> 00:43:39,327 Go, go, go! 619 00:43:39,410 --> 00:43:41,078 - Carter, lock it! - I'm trying to fuckin' lock it, man! 620 00:43:41,162 --> 00:43:42,163 It's not working. 621 00:43:44,999 --> 00:43:46,918 - Come on! - I'm trying! 622 00:43:47,001 --> 00:43:48,169 Move! 623 00:43:50,254 --> 00:43:51,255 Come on! 624 00:44:07,104 --> 00:44:08,606 Carter, get the ax! 625 00:44:27,124 --> 00:44:28,644 Go, go, go. 626 00:44:32,713 --> 00:44:34,382 They're coming! 627 00:44:49,897 --> 00:44:50,898 This way! 628 00:44:52,149 --> 00:44:53,317 Fuck! 629 00:45:06,747 --> 00:45:09,250 This is fucking awesome! Now what? 630 00:45:14,171 --> 00:45:17,508 I'm really sorry I set you on fire, Scout Leader Rogers. 631 00:45:17,592 --> 00:45:19,312 But hopefully, it's not as bad as it looks. 632 00:45:22,263 --> 00:45:23,931 I used a double overhand stopper knot. 633 00:45:25,141 --> 00:45:27,101 It's hard to get out of, right? 634 00:45:27,643 --> 00:45:28,644 Oh! 635 00:45:29,437 --> 00:45:31,188 Okay. All right. 636 00:45:35,443 --> 00:45:38,446 Okay, now. I'll be right back. 637 00:45:39,113 --> 00:45:40,531 Just stay there. 638 00:46:09,769 --> 00:46:11,228 Dude, what the fuck? 639 00:46:11,812 --> 00:46:13,564 Haven't you had enough to eat? Jesus. 640 00:46:14,607 --> 00:46:16,067 Carter, stop agitating them. 641 00:46:16,150 --> 00:46:17,610 What? I need a new profile pic. 642 00:46:21,447 --> 00:46:24,033 So, do you think they evacuated everyone at the party? 643 00:46:24,116 --> 00:46:25,534 Yeah, of course. They had to. 644 00:46:26,744 --> 00:46:28,621 At least we know our parents are okay. 645 00:46:28,704 --> 00:46:30,373 - Yeah. - Where are they? 646 00:46:30,456 --> 00:46:33,125 They went to some lame spiritual yoga retreat. 647 00:46:33,209 --> 00:46:35,044 Ugh. I think I'd rather be in here. 648 00:46:40,925 --> 00:46:42,468 I hope Augie's okay. 649 00:46:42,551 --> 00:46:44,804 - Who's Augie? - He's our best friend. 650 00:46:44,887 --> 00:46:46,555 Well, ex-best friend now. 651 00:46:46,973 --> 00:46:48,015 Why ex? 652 00:46:48,099 --> 00:46:49,725 Because we ditched him for a party. 653 00:46:49,809 --> 00:46:51,310 Ben, we were gonna go back. 654 00:46:51,394 --> 00:46:53,437 Whatever, Carter. We ditched him. We're bad friends. 655 00:46:53,521 --> 00:46:55,690 Why didn't you guys just take him with you? 656 00:46:57,483 --> 00:46:59,235 You don't know Augie. 657 00:46:59,318 --> 00:47:01,070 - What? - He's just different. 658 00:47:01,153 --> 00:47:02,238 Big geek? 659 00:47:02,321 --> 00:47:04,407 He collects deer shit and weaves baskets. 660 00:47:04,490 --> 00:47:05,783 Okay? You do the math. 661 00:47:06,659 --> 00:47:07,743 Okay. 662 00:47:07,827 --> 00:47:08,953 Word of advice, 663 00:47:09,036 --> 00:47:10,997 chasing parties and popularity in high school? 664 00:47:11,080 --> 00:47:12,289 It's a total dead end. 665 00:47:12,373 --> 00:47:13,833 None of that shit will matter later. 666 00:47:13,916 --> 00:47:15,584 Trust me. I know. 667 00:47:15,668 --> 00:47:17,753 You're right, but didn't you, like, drop out of high school? 668 00:47:17,878 --> 00:47:19,588 - No, I got my GED. - Why? 669 00:47:19,714 --> 00:47:21,924 'Cause not everybody has a lily-white life like you do. 670 00:47:22,008 --> 00:47:23,801 Okay. God, you're so hostile. 671 00:47:23,884 --> 00:47:26,512 No, hostile is three seconds from now when my foot's up your ass. 672 00:47:26,595 --> 00:47:28,014 Okay, yeah. Try all you want, 673 00:47:28,097 --> 00:47:29,390 but I happen to have a very tight asshole. 674 00:47:29,473 --> 00:47:31,033 I think I could stretch it out for you. 675 00:47:31,058 --> 00:47:32,518 Oh, well, then lube me up, baby. 676 00:47:32,601 --> 00:47:35,271 Carter! We're gonna play the quiet game now, okay? 677 00:47:36,564 --> 00:47:38,441 All right, you know what? Fine. 678 00:47:39,108 --> 00:47:40,776 I'm over both of you. 679 00:47:50,077 --> 00:47:51,912 You're pretty good at that. 680 00:47:51,996 --> 00:47:54,498 Yeah, I guess that Whittling Badge finally paid off. 681 00:47:58,627 --> 00:47:59,879 What about you? 682 00:47:59,962 --> 00:48:01,172 What about me? 683 00:48:01,255 --> 00:48:03,591 How'd you learn to use a shotgun like that? 684 00:48:04,759 --> 00:48:07,845 My ex-boyfriend was really into guns. 685 00:48:07,928 --> 00:48:10,765 He used to drag me to the firing range once a week. 686 00:48:10,848 --> 00:48:11,849 Oh. 687 00:48:12,266 --> 00:48:14,935 So, no boyfriend now? 688 00:48:15,019 --> 00:48:16,353 Not if I can help it. 689 00:48:17,313 --> 00:48:18,856 Well, why do you say that? 690 00:48:18,939 --> 00:48:20,483 I don't know. 691 00:48:20,816 --> 00:48:23,110 Let's just say, I have really shitty taste in guys. 692 00:48:23,444 --> 00:48:25,529 I'm better off alone. 693 00:48:25,613 --> 00:48:27,490 Nobody's better off alone. 694 00:48:27,573 --> 00:48:28,949 Yeah, well, I am. 695 00:48:30,659 --> 00:48:32,328 Aww, what a beautiful moment. 696 00:48:33,287 --> 00:48:34,914 Ow! Asshole, that hurt! 697 00:48:34,997 --> 00:48:36,874 - Yeah, that was the point! - Oh, was that the point? 698 00:48:36,957 --> 00:48:38,167 Guys! Shh! 699 00:48:38,542 --> 00:48:39,752 Do you hear that? 700 00:48:39,835 --> 00:48:41,045 Is that Crank That? 701 00:48:43,214 --> 00:48:44,548 They're leaving. 702 00:48:44,840 --> 00:48:45,883 I love this song! 703 00:48:45,966 --> 00:48:47,009 You would. 704 00:48:58,145 --> 00:48:59,355 Look! Right there. 705 00:48:59,480 --> 00:49:00,439 Fuck. But they're gonna come back. 706 00:49:00,523 --> 00:49:01,565 What are we gonna do? 707 00:49:01,649 --> 00:49:03,025 - Condoms! - What? 708 00:49:03,150 --> 00:49:05,694 Carter, give me your condoms! Hurry! 709 00:49:07,738 --> 00:49:09,824 Here. Take them and open them and tie them together. 710 00:49:09,907 --> 00:49:10,908 Why are we doing this? 711 00:49:10,991 --> 00:49:12,118 - Just do it! - Okay, okay. 712 00:49:12,201 --> 00:49:13,369 Here's one. 713 00:49:13,494 --> 00:49:14,829 Come on, hurry! 714 00:49:39,770 --> 00:49:42,022 Here we go. Fly fishing. It's genius. 715 00:49:43,190 --> 00:49:46,277 Go on, just a little bit. Get it right up there. 716 00:49:46,360 --> 00:49:48,362 There you go. Come on. 717 00:49:48,445 --> 00:49:49,488 It's right up there! 718 00:49:51,240 --> 00:49:53,075 You got it, come on. 719 00:49:55,369 --> 00:49:57,538 Good work. Yes! Yes! 720 00:49:58,414 --> 00:49:59,415 No, no, no! 721 00:50:01,375 --> 00:50:02,418 Jesus! 722 00:50:02,501 --> 00:50:03,501 You got arrested? 723 00:50:03,544 --> 00:50:04,670 No, we locked ourselves in. 724 00:50:04,753 --> 00:50:06,005 - How? - It was an accident! 725 00:50:06,088 --> 00:50:07,464 This has to be Augie. 726 00:50:07,548 --> 00:50:08,591 Augie, get the keys. 727 00:50:08,716 --> 00:50:10,516 You kicked them into the drainpipe over there. 728 00:50:11,719 --> 00:50:13,137 - I can't reach it! - Shit! 729 00:50:13,220 --> 00:50:14,346 Shit, they're coming back. 730 00:50:14,430 --> 00:50:15,556 Hold on. 731 00:50:16,682 --> 00:50:18,684 What, is there a Lockpicking Badge I'm unaware of? 732 00:50:19,393 --> 00:50:20,394 How'd you find us? 733 00:50:20,519 --> 00:50:21,799 Followed the stench of betrayal. 734 00:50:21,854 --> 00:50:22,855 Augie... 735 00:50:22,938 --> 00:50:25,191 I saw your car. I figured I'd help. 736 00:50:25,274 --> 00:50:26,942 - Augie, look, I'm really... - Got it! 737 00:50:35,618 --> 00:50:37,953 Go, go, go! 738 00:50:43,250 --> 00:50:44,418 Close the gate! 739 00:50:52,635 --> 00:50:54,303 Oh... 740 00:50:56,305 --> 00:50:57,973 ...my... 741 00:50:59,808 --> 00:51:02,478 ...God. 742 00:51:02,937 --> 00:51:03,938 Carter, let's go! 743 00:51:06,106 --> 00:51:07,942 - Come on! - Okay! 744 00:51:09,318 --> 00:51:11,737 Oh, God. I touched them! I touched them! 745 00:51:11,820 --> 00:51:13,322 I don't think they were real. 746 00:51:17,826 --> 00:51:20,079 Fuck, my feet are killing me. 747 00:51:20,162 --> 00:51:22,581 The security checkpoint's only a few miles away. 748 00:51:22,665 --> 00:51:25,209 Dude, I'm starving. 749 00:51:25,292 --> 00:51:28,879 How can you even think of food when people are being eaten alive? 750 00:51:28,963 --> 00:51:31,715 You know, they say that humans taste like pork. 751 00:51:31,799 --> 00:51:33,217 "They"? 752 00:51:33,300 --> 00:51:34,300 Cannibals, I guess. 753 00:51:34,343 --> 00:51:35,761 Dude, I love bacon. 754 00:51:35,844 --> 00:51:37,096 Hey, look. 755 00:51:37,179 --> 00:51:38,973 Maybe the keys are inside. 756 00:51:46,146 --> 00:51:47,314 Jesus! This guy again? 757 00:51:47,398 --> 00:51:48,941 Someone kill him! 758 00:51:49,024 --> 00:51:51,568 Carter, we can't just keep going around killing people. 759 00:51:51,652 --> 00:51:52,736 Why not? 760 00:51:52,820 --> 00:51:53,900 Because he's a human being! 761 00:51:53,946 --> 00:51:55,066 Okay. We'll see how you feel 762 00:51:55,155 --> 00:51:57,075 when he's eating your nutsack like a street taco. 763 00:51:58,450 --> 00:52:00,703 Um, guys, he's getting pretty close. 764 00:52:00,786 --> 00:52:02,246 Remember our Wilderness Safety Seminar? 765 00:52:02,329 --> 00:52:03,329 What? 766 00:52:03,372 --> 00:52:05,582 When encountering a hostile creature, be sure to assert yourself 767 00:52:05,666 --> 00:52:07,251 in order to keep the animal at bay. 768 00:52:07,334 --> 00:52:08,627 Well, I... 769 00:52:10,045 --> 00:52:12,381 That is a zombie, not a bear, dumbass. 770 00:52:26,353 --> 00:52:27,438 Guys, I think he's mimicking me. 771 00:52:27,521 --> 00:52:28,856 Augie, quit messing around. 772 00:52:33,902 --> 00:52:34,987 Augie. 773 00:52:48,542 --> 00:52:49,543 What? 774 00:52:52,129 --> 00:52:53,422 Augie, what are you doing? 775 00:53:05,351 --> 00:53:06,560 What are you doing? 776 00:53:21,533 --> 00:53:22,993 Okay. Did I just drop acid, 777 00:53:23,077 --> 00:53:25,579 or are they really singing Britney Spears with a zombie? 778 00:53:44,181 --> 00:53:45,432 Is that all of you? 779 00:53:45,516 --> 00:53:47,017 Yeah. What the hell's happening? 780 00:53:47,101 --> 00:53:49,520 Don't know yet. Some kind of viral outbreak. 781 00:53:49,603 --> 00:53:51,939 CDC ordered a military containment perimeter. 782 00:53:52,022 --> 00:53:53,148 Is most of the town evacuated? 783 00:53:53,232 --> 00:53:54,525 As many as we could. 784 00:53:54,608 --> 00:53:57,277 This thing hit so hard and fast, we're still trying to contain it. 785 00:53:57,403 --> 00:53:59,523 What about everyone at the party? Were they evacuated? 786 00:54:00,114 --> 00:54:01,281 What party? 787 00:54:43,323 --> 00:54:45,576 Well, where is everybody? 788 00:54:45,659 --> 00:54:48,328 Nobody's here. It must be a mistake. 789 00:54:49,163 --> 00:54:51,582 Yeah, 1146 Dunton Avenue. This is it. 790 00:54:51,665 --> 00:54:54,751 It's not a mistake, Carter. Jeff sent you a fake address. 791 00:54:54,835 --> 00:54:56,003 What? 792 00:54:56,086 --> 00:54:57,671 Carter, this is a waste plant. 793 00:54:57,754 --> 00:54:59,756 You get it? It's full of shit. 794 00:55:01,258 --> 00:55:03,469 Motherfucker! God damn it! 795 00:55:03,802 --> 00:55:06,221 I can't believe he sent us a fucking fake address! 796 00:55:06,305 --> 00:55:07,389 Why does it surprise you? 797 00:55:07,473 --> 00:55:10,234 I mean, did you actually think he was gonna invite us to a real party? 798 00:55:11,018 --> 00:55:12,186 Karma. 799 00:55:12,686 --> 00:55:13,770 What? 800 00:55:13,854 --> 00:55:15,522 - Nothing. - No, speak up. 801 00:55:15,647 --> 00:55:17,232 Well, I just think it's a little ironic 802 00:55:17,316 --> 00:55:20,194 that, you know, you're all upset now because you got ditched. 803 00:55:20,360 --> 00:55:22,946 Oh, okay. So you're saying that we deserve it. 804 00:55:23,030 --> 00:55:24,656 We went to your stupid campout, dude. 805 00:55:24,740 --> 00:55:26,283 You lied to me. 806 00:55:26,366 --> 00:55:28,286 We've been lying to you for the past three years! 807 00:55:28,327 --> 00:55:29,828 - Carter! - Going to every Scout meeting, 808 00:55:29,912 --> 00:55:31,121 every lame field trip. 809 00:55:31,205 --> 00:55:32,456 Wearing these stupid fucking clothes 810 00:55:32,539 --> 00:55:33,624 so everybody can make fun of us. 811 00:55:33,707 --> 00:55:34,708 Carter, that's enough! 812 00:55:34,833 --> 00:55:36,513 Ben, you're not hiding behind me this time. 813 00:55:36,585 --> 00:55:37,628 Tell him. 814 00:55:37,711 --> 00:55:38,837 Talk about how many times 815 00:55:38,921 --> 00:55:40,923 you said you hated Scouts, how sick of it you were. 816 00:55:41,006 --> 00:55:42,799 - I never said that. - Bullshit! 817 00:55:42,883 --> 00:55:43,967 No, no, no. It's fine. 818 00:55:44,051 --> 00:55:46,011 I guess it's time for it to all come out, right? 819 00:55:46,678 --> 00:55:48,889 He's had a crush on Kendall since sixth grade. 820 00:55:49,014 --> 00:55:50,390 - That is not true! - Yes, it is. 821 00:55:50,516 --> 00:55:52,559 - Kendall? As in my sister Kendall? - Mmm-hmm. 822 00:55:52,684 --> 00:55:54,102 - No. - Dude, that's like incest. 823 00:55:54,186 --> 00:55:55,354 No, it's not, I'm not even related to her. 824 00:55:55,437 --> 00:55:56,480 So you do like her, then. 825 00:55:56,563 --> 00:55:58,023 - No, I don't like her! - Told you. 826 00:55:58,106 --> 00:55:59,233 Shut up! 827 00:55:59,608 --> 00:56:00,609 Stop! 828 00:56:01,360 --> 00:56:03,820 Again with this shit? Jesus. 829 00:56:03,904 --> 00:56:05,405 Can't you just walkie someone? 830 00:56:07,199 --> 00:56:08,909 Hey, are you okay? 831 00:56:10,869 --> 00:56:12,621 Guys! 832 00:56:12,704 --> 00:56:14,414 Shit! 833 00:56:16,500 --> 00:56:17,668 Get him! 834 00:56:21,088 --> 00:56:25,592 I'm so fucking sick of zombies! 835 00:56:27,261 --> 00:56:28,345 Yikes. 836 00:56:28,428 --> 00:56:29,429 Wa-wa-wee-wa. 837 00:56:34,560 --> 00:56:35,644 Shit! 838 00:56:40,065 --> 00:56:41,483 Hello! Is anybody there? 839 00:56:41,567 --> 00:56:42,943 Evac complete. 840 00:56:43,277 --> 00:56:44,403 No, no, no, no. We're still here! 841 00:56:44,486 --> 00:56:45,779 We have Operation Clean Up. 842 00:56:46,446 --> 00:56:49,783 Commence aerial bombing of site at 0300. Repeat, 0300. Over. 843 00:56:49,866 --> 00:56:51,076 What? 844 00:56:51,159 --> 00:56:53,412 No, somebody help! Hello! Hello! 845 00:56:53,495 --> 00:56:55,706 Somebody help, please! Hello! 846 00:56:55,789 --> 00:56:56,873 Fuck! 847 00:56:56,957 --> 00:56:58,709 They're gonna bomb the town in two hours? 848 00:56:58,792 --> 00:56:59,835 What are we gonna do? 849 00:56:59,918 --> 00:57:01,044 We have to find Kendall and the others! 850 00:57:01,128 --> 00:57:02,671 It's a secret party. They could be anywhere. 851 00:57:02,838 --> 00:57:03,839 Shit. 852 00:57:04,590 --> 00:57:05,757 My sister's diary! 853 00:57:06,133 --> 00:57:08,885 She writes every last boring detail of her life in there. 854 00:57:08,969 --> 00:57:11,888 I guarantee she wrote down where the party is. 855 00:57:11,972 --> 00:57:13,473 We better get fucking going, then. 856 00:57:39,333 --> 00:57:40,334 Okay, now. 857 00:58:13,825 --> 00:58:15,202 All right, come on. 858 00:58:25,712 --> 00:58:28,298 Whew! It smells like Pixy Stix and hope in here. 859 00:58:28,548 --> 00:58:31,051 You've never been in a girl's room before, have you? 860 00:58:31,176 --> 00:58:33,261 - Yeah, I... - Mom doesn't count. 861 00:58:33,345 --> 00:58:34,638 - Well... - Any female relative doesn't count. 862 00:58:34,721 --> 00:58:37,182 Guys! Can we focus? Where's the diary? 863 00:58:37,641 --> 00:58:39,559 She changes the hiding place, like, every week, 864 00:58:39,685 --> 00:58:41,228 so just spread out and start looking. 865 00:58:58,829 --> 00:59:00,330 - Did you find it? - Nope. 866 00:59:00,872 --> 00:59:02,582 Nothing over here. 867 00:59:16,346 --> 00:59:17,347 Hey. 868 00:59:17,764 --> 00:59:18,849 Did you guys hear that? 869 00:59:18,932 --> 00:59:19,933 Hear what? 870 00:59:21,393 --> 00:59:23,395 I think I heard something downstairs. 871 00:59:24,438 --> 00:59:25,772 Augie, go check it out. 872 00:59:25,856 --> 00:59:27,357 I'm not going down there by myself. 873 00:59:27,441 --> 00:59:28,900 - Go with him. - Why me? 874 00:59:28,984 --> 00:59:30,902 Call me when your balls drop, dude. 875 00:59:36,908 --> 00:59:38,702 Shh! Don't walk so hard. 876 00:59:38,785 --> 00:59:40,954 You have squeaky floors. 877 00:59:43,039 --> 00:59:44,791 This is Carter's sister? 878 00:59:46,460 --> 00:59:47,794 Yeah. That's Kendall. 879 00:59:48,795 --> 00:59:50,797 Well, she clearly won the genetic lottery. 880 00:59:51,131 --> 00:59:53,842 Yeah. She's okay. I guess. 881 00:59:53,925 --> 00:59:55,218 Dude, she's more than okay. 882 00:59:55,302 --> 00:59:56,970 You don't have to be all cool about it. 883 00:59:58,597 --> 00:59:59,931 Shit. 884 01:00:01,975 --> 01:00:03,643 Fuck. Come on. 885 01:00:05,395 --> 01:00:07,397 So, how come you haven't told her you like her? 886 01:00:07,481 --> 01:00:08,815 What's the point? 887 01:00:08,899 --> 01:00:10,901 She's never gonna go for a guy like me. 888 01:00:10,984 --> 01:00:12,569 And she's got a boyfriend. 889 01:00:12,652 --> 01:00:15,405 And Carter would kill me if I touched his sister. 890 01:00:15,489 --> 01:00:17,699 Okay, look. Here's the deal. 891 01:00:17,783 --> 01:00:20,577 And don't take this the wrong way, 892 01:00:20,660 --> 01:00:22,871 but you have to man up. 893 01:00:22,954 --> 01:00:24,831 Yeah, but I suck at being that guy. 894 01:00:24,915 --> 01:00:26,541 I'm not assertive like that. 895 01:00:26,625 --> 01:00:27,626 Kiss me. 896 01:00:28,084 --> 01:00:29,085 What? 897 01:00:29,169 --> 01:00:30,649 Don't "what" me, just do it. Kiss me. 898 01:00:31,588 --> 01:00:32,672 Are you serious? 899 01:00:32,756 --> 01:00:34,341 Yeah, I'm serious. I saw you checking out my ass earlier. 900 01:00:34,466 --> 01:00:35,675 I know you want to do it. Just kiss me. 901 01:00:35,801 --> 01:00:36,843 - No, I wasn't. - Ben! 902 01:00:36,968 --> 01:00:38,762 - Okay, for a second I did. - Kiss me. 903 01:00:39,846 --> 01:00:40,931 Denise, I... 904 01:00:41,014 --> 01:00:42,516 You can do it. Just go for it. 905 01:00:45,352 --> 01:00:46,603 - I'm sorry! I'm sorry! - Oh, fuck! Fuck. 906 01:00:46,686 --> 01:00:48,286 - I'm so sorry. Are you okay? - I'm fine. 907 01:00:48,355 --> 01:00:49,356 See? I told you we shouldn't have done that. 908 01:00:49,439 --> 01:00:50,440 It was a bad idea. 909 01:00:50,524 --> 01:00:51,858 No, no, no. Let's just try it again. 910 01:00:51,942 --> 01:00:54,110 No, I feel stupid. We should look for the diary. 911 01:00:54,194 --> 01:00:55,362 Come here. 912 01:01:08,500 --> 01:01:09,501 Not bad. 913 01:01:10,293 --> 01:01:11,294 Really? 914 01:01:11,378 --> 01:01:13,797 It wasn't, like, top five or anything. Don't get excited. 915 01:01:13,880 --> 01:01:15,757 - But, yeah, it was okay. - Oh. 916 01:01:15,841 --> 01:01:18,552 When you see Kendall, just walk straight up to her, 917 01:01:18,635 --> 01:01:19,803 lay some of that shit on her, 918 01:01:19,886 --> 01:01:21,388 and you're golden. 919 01:01:22,180 --> 01:01:24,015 Okay. Thanks. 920 01:01:29,396 --> 01:01:30,981 Guess we left it open. 921 01:01:31,982 --> 01:01:32,983 Hey, Augie. 922 01:01:36,736 --> 01:01:38,572 Ben didn't want to leave you tonight. 923 01:01:40,782 --> 01:01:42,576 It was my idea. 924 01:01:43,577 --> 01:01:45,161 What difference does it make? 925 01:01:45,245 --> 01:01:46,580 It's done. 926 01:01:51,167 --> 01:01:52,335 Yeah. 927 01:02:00,510 --> 01:02:01,511 Oh, fuck! 928 01:02:13,023 --> 01:02:14,107 Come on. 929 01:02:14,190 --> 01:02:15,950 What the hell is going on down there? 930 01:02:16,026 --> 01:02:18,278 We're fine! Everything's under control! 931 01:02:41,384 --> 01:02:44,888 No! No, no, no, no. Fucking, no! Not my ass! 932 01:02:46,681 --> 01:02:48,058 Oh, no, no, no, no! 933 01:02:51,144 --> 01:02:53,480 My ass! My ass! 934 01:02:53,563 --> 01:02:55,815 She's gumming my ass! 935 01:02:55,899 --> 01:02:57,317 Oh, my God! 936 01:02:57,400 --> 01:02:58,401 Carter! 937 01:02:58,735 --> 01:03:01,404 Oh, God! Oh, it's disgusting! 938 01:03:07,577 --> 01:03:09,162 Carter! 939 01:03:11,289 --> 01:03:12,666 Peace out, bitch! 940 01:03:16,586 --> 01:03:18,171 What the hell happened? 941 01:03:19,839 --> 01:03:22,258 Shit. Back upstairs! Back upstairs! 942 01:03:29,808 --> 01:03:31,101 Come on, come on! 943 01:03:31,184 --> 01:03:32,769 Move it! 944 01:03:33,853 --> 01:03:35,230 That's not gonna hold them! 945 01:03:35,313 --> 01:03:37,065 - Did you find the journal? - No! We looked everywhere! 946 01:03:37,148 --> 01:03:38,525 Guys, we got to go! Come on! 947 01:03:53,707 --> 01:03:55,458 Oh, my God! They're coming! 948 01:03:57,210 --> 01:03:59,254 Guys, if we jump, we might be able to clear the fence! 949 01:03:59,337 --> 01:04:01,047 - What? - Fuck it, let's just jump! 950 01:04:01,131 --> 01:04:02,674 The fence is like 10 feet away! 951 01:04:03,174 --> 01:04:05,301 - I'll go first! - Go, go! 952 01:04:11,224 --> 01:04:12,350 Okay. Go, go, go! 953 01:04:19,315 --> 01:04:21,067 Augie, you got to go now! 954 01:04:22,360 --> 01:04:23,361 Hurry! 955 01:04:23,445 --> 01:04:24,487 I can't, I'm afraid of heights! 956 01:04:24,571 --> 01:04:26,156 Be more afraid of zombies! Go! 957 01:05:07,197 --> 01:05:08,948 Is that his wiener? 958 01:05:10,533 --> 01:05:11,576 We got to do something. 959 01:05:12,035 --> 01:05:13,870 Guys, help me! I'm falling! 960 01:05:13,953 --> 01:05:15,872 Hang on to that cock, Ben! 961 01:05:16,289 --> 01:05:18,208 Guys, hurry! Help me! 962 01:05:19,876 --> 01:05:21,711 What are you doing? 963 01:05:22,712 --> 01:05:25,048 Hey! Assholes! Come and get me. 964 01:05:29,552 --> 01:05:30,887 Hurry! 965 01:05:32,222 --> 01:05:33,223 It's ripping! 966 01:05:36,726 --> 01:05:38,895 His dick's ripping! 967 01:05:57,539 --> 01:05:58,748 - I got it! - Dude! 968 01:06:01,793 --> 01:06:03,044 - I got it. - Where was it? 969 01:06:03,128 --> 01:06:04,504 - Underwear drawer. - Classic. 970 01:06:05,547 --> 01:06:06,714 Run! 971 01:06:11,261 --> 01:06:12,595 Lock it. 972 01:06:12,929 --> 01:06:14,514 Augie, get the lights. 973 01:06:15,598 --> 01:06:17,100 The power's out. 974 01:06:17,684 --> 01:06:19,352 Where the hell are we? 975 01:06:20,770 --> 01:06:22,105 Mrs. Fielder's house. 976 01:06:22,355 --> 01:06:24,115 I can't believe we just chopped her head off. 977 01:06:24,149 --> 01:06:26,609 She tried to eat my ass, Augie. She deserved it. 978 01:06:26,693 --> 01:06:28,862 Guys, we got to keep moving. Come on. 979 01:06:43,459 --> 01:06:44,836 Carter, check the window. 980 01:06:48,882 --> 01:06:50,675 Shit, they're everywhere. 981 01:06:50,758 --> 01:06:52,260 Miss Fielder's car is in the garage. 982 01:06:52,343 --> 01:06:54,387 Maybe we can get out that way. This way. 983 01:07:09,986 --> 01:07:11,112 What was that? 984 01:07:11,196 --> 01:07:12,739 I think something's in here. 985 01:07:14,574 --> 01:07:15,575 Fuck, cat. 986 01:07:22,749 --> 01:07:23,750 Augie? 987 01:07:23,833 --> 01:07:25,126 Dude, dude. 988 01:07:25,210 --> 01:07:26,961 - Augie. - What? 989 01:07:27,045 --> 01:07:28,963 Don't move. 990 01:07:40,266 --> 01:07:42,685 - Did you get it? - I got it! I got it! 991 01:07:48,024 --> 01:07:49,400 Run! 992 01:07:55,448 --> 01:07:57,784 Come on, come on, come on! 993 01:07:58,534 --> 01:07:59,869 Open the garage door! 994 01:07:59,953 --> 01:08:01,204 It won't open! 995 01:08:01,537 --> 01:08:02,705 Go! Ben, go! 996 01:08:02,872 --> 01:08:03,998 Fuck it! 997 01:08:15,051 --> 01:08:16,891 Oh, my God. It's Scout Leader Rogers! 998 01:08:18,221 --> 01:08:19,430 He looks like shit! 999 01:08:19,514 --> 01:08:20,723 I set him on fire. 1000 01:08:21,099 --> 01:08:22,809 - What? - He tried to eat me! 1001 01:08:27,563 --> 01:08:29,482 - Wait, what are you doing? - No, don't... 1002 01:08:37,907 --> 01:08:39,325 Sorry, bro! 1003 01:08:56,801 --> 01:08:59,220 All right, the diary said they're at the old rec center on Dewer Street. 1004 01:08:59,304 --> 01:09:00,847 Hopefully, we're not too late. 1005 01:09:00,930 --> 01:09:02,850 All right, I'll try to get help as soon as I can. 1006 01:09:02,932 --> 01:09:04,517 Just be careful. 1007 01:09:12,442 --> 01:09:14,319 - Denise. - Yeah? 1008 01:09:15,194 --> 01:09:17,447 Look, I don't know what's gonna happen, 1009 01:09:18,448 --> 01:09:19,824 but I just wanted to let you know that 1010 01:09:19,907 --> 01:09:21,707 you're one of the coolest girls I've ever met. 1011 01:09:25,621 --> 01:09:27,874 And, uh, I hope you meet someone that deserves you. 1012 01:09:29,459 --> 01:09:30,460 Thanks. 1013 01:09:59,989 --> 01:10:01,908 Guys, let's go. We got to get to the party. 1014 01:10:01,991 --> 01:10:04,369 Ben, this is a suicide mission. 1015 01:10:04,452 --> 01:10:06,162 Guys, they're gonna bomb this whole town 1016 01:10:06,245 --> 01:10:07,330 in less than two hours. 1017 01:10:07,413 --> 01:10:09,332 What if Denise reaches the military in time? 1018 01:10:09,415 --> 01:10:11,209 And what if she doesn't, Carter? Then what? 1019 01:10:11,292 --> 01:10:13,753 Who's gonna save them? The police? They're gone. 1020 01:10:13,836 --> 01:10:16,839 The military? They're not coming, either. 1021 01:10:17,507 --> 01:10:19,842 Guys, we're the last line of defense. 1022 01:10:21,386 --> 01:10:23,846 And so what? Maybe we look like dorks in these uniforms. 1023 01:10:23,930 --> 01:10:26,891 And maybe we're a big joke to everyone at school. 1024 01:10:28,684 --> 01:10:30,686 But tonight, 1025 01:10:30,770 --> 01:10:33,051 we're gonna show them what being a real Scout's all about. 1026 01:10:33,940 --> 01:10:38,069 So, are we just gonna stand here with our thumbs up our asses? 1027 01:10:38,694 --> 01:10:41,280 Or are we gonna go out there and save the world? 1028 01:10:42,615 --> 01:10:43,866 Fuck, yeah, dude. 1029 01:10:45,201 --> 01:10:46,702 That was a really good speech, Ben. 1030 01:10:47,453 --> 01:10:48,538 Thanks, Augie. 1031 01:10:48,621 --> 01:10:49,956 Let's do it. 1032 01:10:52,959 --> 01:10:54,710 The rec center's that way. 1033 01:10:56,379 --> 01:10:58,381 We're making a pit stop first. 1034 01:12:10,620 --> 01:12:12,371 Are you serious? 1035 01:12:13,414 --> 01:12:16,709 None of my text messages are going through, Travis. 1036 01:12:16,792 --> 01:12:18,294 Don't worry about that, baby. 1037 01:12:18,377 --> 01:12:20,129 Where are you taking me? 1038 01:12:21,005 --> 01:12:22,882 Um, it's a surprise. 1039 01:12:22,965 --> 01:12:25,285 You need a little spanking, don't you? 1040 01:12:26,719 --> 01:12:27,720 Ew. 1041 01:12:28,137 --> 01:12:29,805 Travis, what the fuck? 1042 01:12:30,139 --> 01:12:31,140 Come on. 1043 01:12:31,557 --> 01:12:33,643 Okay, this place is disgusting. 1044 01:12:34,894 --> 01:12:36,479 I need to examine you. 1045 01:12:36,562 --> 01:12:38,064 - Get over here. - Oh, okay. 1046 01:12:40,983 --> 01:12:42,985 God, you're so sexy. 1047 01:12:43,319 --> 01:12:44,487 Thank you. 1048 01:12:46,322 --> 01:12:48,491 Okay, we're not about to fuck right now. 1049 01:12:48,574 --> 01:12:49,825 Why not? 1050 01:12:50,409 --> 01:12:52,912 Because we've only been dating for, like, two minutes. 1051 01:12:52,995 --> 01:12:53,996 What about a blow job? 1052 01:12:54,080 --> 01:12:56,666 Travis, I spent an hour trying to find this piece of gum. 1053 01:12:57,667 --> 01:12:59,001 Sucks. 1054 01:13:01,170 --> 01:13:03,589 Okay, fine. You can eat me out. 1055 01:13:03,673 --> 01:13:05,591 - Really? - Yes. You're welcome. 1056 01:13:14,267 --> 01:13:15,518 When I'm in jail 1057 01:13:15,601 --> 01:13:17,603 the first thing you do is talk to another chick. 1058 01:13:17,687 --> 01:13:19,021 What the fuck? 1059 01:13:22,858 --> 01:13:25,361 Hey, pervert, fuck off! 1060 01:13:29,198 --> 01:13:30,700 You serious, bro? 1061 01:13:37,164 --> 01:13:39,375 I was in jail! 1062 01:13:41,877 --> 01:13:44,130 Hello? Are you going to do it or what? 1063 01:13:57,768 --> 01:14:01,689 Ooh! Your mouth's kind of cold. 1064 01:14:12,074 --> 01:14:13,075 Stop. 1065 01:14:14,076 --> 01:14:16,245 - Stop! - Come on, babe. 1066 01:14:16,329 --> 01:14:18,247 - Stop it! - What the fuck's your problem? 1067 01:14:18,331 --> 01:14:19,498 I'm worried about my brother. 1068 01:14:19,582 --> 01:14:21,167 He should've been here hours ago. 1069 01:14:21,250 --> 01:14:22,376 He's not coming, babe. 1070 01:14:22,460 --> 01:14:23,753 How do you know? 1071 01:14:23,836 --> 01:14:26,172 Because I gave him the wrong address. 1072 01:14:26,255 --> 01:14:28,341 - What? - They're Scouts, Kendall! 1073 01:14:28,424 --> 01:14:30,926 Look, what'd you think, I was gonna invite them for real? 1074 01:14:31,010 --> 01:14:33,512 - Come here. - You are such a dick! 1075 01:14:33,596 --> 01:14:35,473 - What? You're not leaving. - Watch me! 1076 01:14:35,556 --> 01:14:36,891 You're not going! 1077 01:14:38,726 --> 01:14:40,353 Fine, go, bitch! 1078 01:14:43,189 --> 01:14:45,858 Oh, Jesus, girl. Get a fucking tampon, would you? 1079 01:14:56,619 --> 01:14:57,953 Someone help! 1080 01:14:59,664 --> 01:15:02,208 Help! Please, someone help! 1081 01:16:11,068 --> 01:16:13,779 All right, Scouts, let's kick some zombie ass. 1082 01:16:49,273 --> 01:16:50,441 Boom. 1083 01:17:06,999 --> 01:17:08,000 Chloe? 1084 01:17:08,167 --> 01:17:09,168 Oh, man. 1085 01:17:11,962 --> 01:17:12,963 Nailed it. 1086 01:17:35,986 --> 01:17:37,530 What a dick. 1087 01:17:41,659 --> 01:17:43,035 Ben, they're everywhere! 1088 01:17:43,327 --> 01:17:44,703 Circle up! 1089 01:17:50,292 --> 01:17:51,293 You want some of this? 1090 01:17:51,377 --> 01:17:54,004 You assholes! Die! 1091 01:17:54,338 --> 01:17:57,174 Come on! You want a piece of me? 1092 01:17:59,677 --> 01:18:01,637 Ben! Ben! 1093 01:18:01,720 --> 01:18:03,514 Help! 1094 01:18:08,602 --> 01:18:09,728 Ben! 1095 01:18:09,854 --> 01:18:11,230 Hang on, Kendall! I'm coming! 1096 01:18:13,524 --> 01:18:14,692 Oh, shit. 1097 01:18:15,025 --> 01:18:16,694 Oh, shit. Shit, start! Come on! 1098 01:18:17,027 --> 01:18:18,362 Ben, look out! 1099 01:18:18,529 --> 01:18:19,530 Shit. 1100 01:18:30,875 --> 01:18:32,543 Ben, duck! 1101 01:18:38,757 --> 01:18:39,758 Ben! 1102 01:18:40,718 --> 01:18:43,220 Kendall, come down! Climb down, hurry! 1103 01:18:46,098 --> 01:18:47,600 - Are you okay? - Yeah, I think so. 1104 01:18:47,725 --> 01:18:49,059 Guys, come on! 1105 01:18:49,143 --> 01:18:50,436 - Come on. - Come on! 1106 01:18:50,728 --> 01:18:53,439 We got to get everyone out of here! Let's go! 1107 01:18:53,898 --> 01:18:56,734 Everybody! Get to the stairs! Come on! 1108 01:19:03,574 --> 01:19:04,617 Let's go! 1109 01:19:04,742 --> 01:19:06,243 Come on, everybody, move! 1110 01:19:06,577 --> 01:19:10,247 Hurry up! Come on, come on! Let's go! 1111 01:19:10,456 --> 01:19:11,582 Let's go! 1112 01:19:11,916 --> 01:19:13,417 Let's go! Come on! 1113 01:19:13,584 --> 01:19:14,627 Oh, shit! 1114 01:19:19,590 --> 01:19:20,674 What are you doing? 1115 01:19:20,758 --> 01:19:22,509 They'll follow you if we don't lock the doors! You gotta go! 1116 01:19:22,593 --> 01:19:24,313 - What about you? - You got to go! Trust me! 1117 01:19:24,470 --> 01:19:25,804 I'm not leaving you! No! 1118 01:19:25,971 --> 01:19:27,765 Go! Go! Trust me! 1119 01:19:35,814 --> 01:19:37,149 - I'm out! - Oh, shit! 1120 01:19:37,316 --> 01:19:39,818 There's too many of them! Come on, let's go! Hurry! 1121 01:19:40,277 --> 01:19:41,320 Let's go! 1122 01:19:41,987 --> 01:19:42,988 Oh, fuck! 1123 01:19:43,989 --> 01:19:45,199 Let's go! 1124 01:19:45,282 --> 01:19:46,450 Come on! 1125 01:19:51,664 --> 01:19:53,457 Hurry, come on! 1126 01:19:53,958 --> 01:19:55,292 Go, Augie, go! 1127 01:19:56,293 --> 01:19:58,128 Run! Run! 1128 01:20:09,598 --> 01:20:11,350 Where's the door? 1129 01:20:11,433 --> 01:20:13,519 There's got to be another exit. 1130 01:20:13,602 --> 01:20:15,020 I don't see one! 1131 01:20:15,104 --> 01:20:16,772 - We're trapped. - Shit. 1132 01:20:17,106 --> 01:20:18,546 - There's no way out of here. - Fuck. 1133 01:20:20,776 --> 01:20:22,194 - What do we do? - Give me your backpack. 1134 01:20:22,361 --> 01:20:24,363 What? What are you doing? 1135 01:20:29,702 --> 01:20:31,370 - What is that? - It's a bomb. 1136 01:20:31,704 --> 01:20:32,746 You made a bomb? 1137 01:20:32,830 --> 01:20:34,039 What are you, the Taliban? 1138 01:20:34,164 --> 01:20:37,084 Either we die fast or we're eaten alive and turn into one of those things! 1139 01:20:38,210 --> 01:20:39,670 Your choice. 1140 01:20:42,297 --> 01:20:44,049 - Shit. - Carter, give me your lighter. 1141 01:20:45,300 --> 01:20:46,301 Here. 1142 01:20:50,723 --> 01:20:52,057 Are you guys ready? 1143 01:20:56,353 --> 01:20:58,022 - Wait! - What? 1144 01:20:58,564 --> 01:20:59,606 I need to say something. 1145 01:20:59,690 --> 01:21:00,983 Ben, it's fine. 1146 01:21:01,066 --> 01:21:02,826 - You don't have to do this. - No, I do. 1147 01:21:03,485 --> 01:21:05,365 We should have never ditched you tonight, Augie. 1148 01:21:05,821 --> 01:21:07,906 What we did was really messed up. 1149 01:21:07,990 --> 01:21:10,325 He's right. We've been complete D-bags. 1150 01:21:10,826 --> 01:21:12,619 It's my fault. I never should have made you guys think 1151 01:21:12,703 --> 01:21:14,246 you had to be in Scouts for just me. 1152 01:21:14,329 --> 01:21:15,914 No, that's just it! 1153 01:21:15,998 --> 01:21:18,292 I thought I wanted out, but I was just worried 1154 01:21:18,375 --> 01:21:21,253 what other people were gonna think. The truth is, 1155 01:21:22,671 --> 01:21:24,506 I love being a Scout. 1156 01:21:25,507 --> 01:21:28,510 And I love it because it's the reason I met you guys. 1157 01:21:31,597 --> 01:21:34,767 And I know tonight's been really crazy and fucked up, 1158 01:21:34,850 --> 01:21:36,268 but one good thing has happened. 1159 01:21:36,685 --> 01:21:38,395 And it's this, right now. 1160 01:21:39,646 --> 01:21:40,731 Us. 1161 01:21:40,898 --> 01:21:42,524 Being back together. 1162 01:21:45,194 --> 01:21:46,528 Scouts forever. 1163 01:21:49,448 --> 01:21:51,033 Scouts forever. 1164 01:21:53,202 --> 01:21:54,203 Scouts forever. 1165 01:22:00,793 --> 01:22:03,212 Ben? Is it really lame if I hold your hand right now? 1166 01:22:03,545 --> 01:22:04,546 No. 1167 01:22:07,800 --> 01:22:09,635 Oh, God damn it. This stupid thing! 1168 01:22:10,719 --> 01:22:12,387 - What are you doing? - It's out of fluid! 1169 01:22:12,471 --> 01:22:13,722 Here. Give me that. 1170 01:22:14,640 --> 01:22:16,100 Wait, do you have another lighter? 1171 01:22:19,895 --> 01:22:22,064 God damn it, Augie, we were supposed to die fast! 1172 01:22:24,566 --> 01:22:26,068 This is gonna hurt so bad. 1173 01:22:26,151 --> 01:22:27,653 Come on, Augie, you can do it! 1174 01:22:27,736 --> 01:22:29,988 Don't pressure me! I hate that! 1175 01:22:31,698 --> 01:22:34,118 Yo, dipshits! You just gonna sit there or what? 1176 01:22:35,494 --> 01:22:37,079 Where'd she come from? 1177 01:22:39,456 --> 01:22:40,916 Augie, leave it! 1178 01:22:48,382 --> 01:22:49,383 Augie, let's go! 1179 01:23:27,796 --> 01:23:29,214 Are you guys okay? 1180 01:23:29,298 --> 01:23:31,383 I'm alive. I'm alive! 1181 01:23:31,466 --> 01:23:33,218 Oh, my God! Augie! 1182 01:23:33,302 --> 01:23:35,304 - Dude! You're a genius! - It worked! 1183 01:23:35,387 --> 01:23:36,805 That was fucking awesome! 1184 01:23:36,889 --> 01:23:38,223 - Fuck, yeah, man! - It worked! 1185 01:23:40,309 --> 01:23:41,602 What the fuck? 1186 01:23:42,060 --> 01:23:43,812 Is that Scout Leader Rogers? 1187 01:23:46,315 --> 01:23:48,442 You got to hand it to him. The man is a fighter. 1188 01:23:49,735 --> 01:23:52,321 Oh, shit. Does anybody have a weapon? 1189 01:23:52,404 --> 01:23:54,907 There's got to be something around here. 1190 01:24:09,755 --> 01:24:10,756 Ah! 1191 01:24:12,674 --> 01:24:15,302 Every goddamn time! Ugh! 1192 01:24:26,688 --> 01:24:28,106 Now you decide to show up. 1193 01:24:49,461 --> 01:24:51,630 Evacuation fleet moving to secondary location. 1194 01:24:51,713 --> 01:24:53,131 Dude, you look like shit. 1195 01:24:53,215 --> 01:24:54,455 Yeah, well, what do you expect? 1196 01:24:54,508 --> 01:24:55,634 I've been killing zombies all night. 1197 01:24:55,717 --> 01:24:57,357 Yeah, you were kind of badass last night. 1198 01:24:58,887 --> 01:25:00,389 Well, thanks for coming back. 1199 01:25:00,472 --> 01:25:01,807 Somebody's got to keep saving your ass. 1200 01:25:01,890 --> 01:25:03,225 Yeah, I guess so. 1201 01:25:03,892 --> 01:25:07,229 So, um, are we gonna hang out after this, or... 1202 01:25:07,646 --> 01:25:09,731 Come on, I feel like the four of us are a team now. 1203 01:25:09,815 --> 01:25:10,857 Relax, dude. 1204 01:25:10,983 --> 01:25:13,485 You've got some business to take care of right now. 1205 01:25:17,781 --> 01:25:19,616 Go for it. You got this. 1206 01:25:20,450 --> 01:25:22,536 - All right. - Go. 1207 01:25:27,791 --> 01:25:30,127 I am so happy that you're okay. 1208 01:25:33,255 --> 01:25:37,050 Oh, that's so sweet. Up top! 1209 01:25:37,301 --> 01:25:38,885 Dude, I'm not high-fiving that. 1210 01:25:38,969 --> 01:25:40,053 Come on. 1211 01:25:40,137 --> 01:25:42,055 You think I'm high-fiving that? 1212 01:25:42,139 --> 01:25:43,724 Come on! 1213 01:25:44,141 --> 01:25:45,475 Aww, look at them! 1214 01:25:49,688 --> 01:25:51,023 Who are you? 1215 01:25:51,523 --> 01:25:52,858 I'm a Scout. 1216 01:25:57,487 --> 01:25:58,530 All right, well, this just means 1217 01:25:58,655 --> 01:25:59,895 - I'm gonna fuck his mom. - Hey! 1218 01:25:59,948 --> 01:26:01,116 What? 1219 01:28:26,344 --> 01:28:28,013 Come on. 1220 01:28:30,223 --> 01:28:31,516 The end. 1220 01:28:32,305 --> 01:28:38,753 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org82922

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