Original subtitles

Ladies and gentlemen, we ask you to please

remain seated throughout the entire performance.

The use of recording devices and flash photography is strictly prohibited.

Please make a note of all emergency exits, and thank you for not smoking.

And now, introducing our host, Tina and Carol!

On your mark, get set, go!

What?

I said I closed early.

We're a hundred over capacity.

Get the hell back down there and open up.

There's a line around the block.

Fire Marshal doesn't give a shit about this place.

Okay, okay, don't lift your leg on me.

On the dance floor!

Gina.

You wanna shut that curtain over there?

That beat's killing me.

Five GHB, three special Ks, six hits of X...

and two eight balls.

You are cleared for takeoff.

Haven't I already done you?

Uh-huh, three times.

Johnny, I bet you're the most action this old girl's gonna get tonight.

Get out of here.

Oh, please, just risk me one more time.

I'm so close.

Next in line.

It's Miller time.

What the fuck?

Hello, gorgeous.

Just talk to her.

Shit.

Put your hands up, turn around, and place them above your head.

You should be fine.

Let's just give him a warning and cut him loose, okay?

You're kidding, right?

Give me your I.D.

Look, I know what we were doing is wrong.

I'm not that kind of person.

You disgust me, you know that?

Sir?

I said you disgust me.

Well, can't you hear me?

Well?

Well?

Please.

Okay.

Okay.

Mike, take it easy.

Let's just let him go, okay?

Maybe he likes a little pain, huh?

Look at that, see?

Leave him alone.

Johnny?

Do you two know each other?

Go.

Get the hell out of here, man.

Go.

That's

the guy I'm talking about.

I can't believe it.

We got a

problem here, John.

Nobody wants to be your partner, and I can't fire you for being...

how you are.

And I'd never even try, you know that.

Yes, sir.

Your private life is your own business, but this is a small, conservative town.

Why do you want to do police work here?

Because, um...

Because I grew up here.

Have you ever considered, uh...

relocating to an environment more compatible with your lifestyle?

Aren't you lonely, son?

What's going on?

Hey, John.

Oh, Jesus Christ, man.

Mike, this is bullshit.

I'm not gonna fight you tonight.

Okay,

you sure that when I get to L.A., I can stay with you guys for a while?

Okay, I mean, like Gil won't mind?

I'm your cousin, girl.

We sisters.

Ted, if you call me girl, so help me God, I am not coming.

Okay, okay, okay.

You don't belong in that world, John.

You can chill here.

Okay.

So, um...

Are you, uh... Are you sure you won't mind my bird friends?

Of course not.

Believe me, I've got friends who fly, too.

How are you?

Okay.

Um, so, some things have changed since last time we spoke.

Since Saturday?

Um... Gil and I are sort of over.

This is Julian.

He's my new boyfriend.

Hey.

Hey, man.

Welcome to L.A.

I really want to be your friend.

Okay.

Hey, John.

I can see by the look on your face Ted's filling you in.

I always thought you two were the perfect couple.

Well, I guess I'm hoping it's a phase Ted's going through.

Julian is a psycho guru DJ we met out dancing the other night.

Uh-huh.

He wanted to do a three-way.

And we were bored.

That's the last time I get high.

So they're both living in your house?

It's Ted's house, too.

For seven years.

I'm a wuss, huh?

Look, Gil, um...

If there's not enough room here, I can work something else out.

No, no, no, no.

I insist you stay here.

I've been looking forward to your company.

Thank you.

Hey, what's with the camera?

I'm doing a documentary.

You ever heard of circuit parties?

Yeah, I've heard of them.

Hey, are you a party boy now?

No.

And I never get involved with any of my subjects.

Is that why you're dating a DJ?

Eat me, baby.

So, John, tell us.

What are your expectations of L.A.?

What's the allure?

I don't know.

I just want to simplify my life.

Hey, we're invited to a party tonight.

What?

What party?

It's up in the hills.

I told some friends about you.

I should definitely change, then.

Okay, well, I got...

Is this okay?

It's cute.

Wow.

Whose house?

Some studio exec.

Most of the Hollywood game mafia is going to be here tonight.

Hey, John.

When was the last time you were at the aquarium?

I don't remember.

Why?

Welcome to the shark tank.

It's feeding time.

Hey, come on.

Get out of here.

Do I have spinach on my teeth?

Keep smiling.

And don't be seduced by any shiny objects like credit cards.

Okay?

Hey, Mark.

Good to see you.

This is my friend John I was telling you about.

Oh, are you really an ex-cop?

This stuff powers my aura, man.

I gotta keep my system clear to spin my tunes.

You know, I totally dig that about you.

You are so committed to your music, you know?

It's like me and films.

Oh, my God!

Man, I was just about to say the same thing.

Nice entrance.

You working?

Excuse me?

You're not hustling.

Look, if this is your territory, not to worry.

Even if you were working, I wouldn't worry.

I'm one type, you're another.

What type are you?

You'll never know.

Why are you sad?

I only have sex for money.

Did you ever have sex for money?

Hopefully I'm not that horrible.

You're hard up.

You think only hard up guys buy and sell sex?

Look around.

I bet sex was mostly men at this party.

I didn't get paid to stay here.

Well, I love this.

You look a little uncomfortable.

What's that?

It's GHB.

But it's a little dangerous.

You have to make sure that you take the right amount.

Why would I want to risk that?

Oh, it's worth the risk, baby.

It's the most incredible high you'll ever feel.

You'll turn your whole body into a raging hard-on.

Well, thanks, but I think I'll keep my hard-on where it is.

Okay.

Listen, this is my client.

Call me if you get bored.

I love beautiful friends.

I appreciate you guys helping me find this place.

I really do.

No problem, buddy.

Hey, here, I brought you a copy of our local Yellow Pages.

In case you get a little bored.

Yeah.

Welcome to a whole new chapter of your life.

Hey, don't look so worried.

We live just down the hill.

Hi, how you doing?

Hi.

There you go.

Shut up.

Go for it.

Here's some coffee.

Thank you.

Thanks.

What's going on?

What's eating you?

You know, I've been more than generous with you, Hector.

I mean, I never really planned on a regular monetary commitment here.

I mean, my lawyer says that I've opened myself up to all sorts of...

You've met someone.

My therapist says I need to find someone who likes me for me.

That I'm never going to find true intimacy until I try monogamy.

Baby, I agree to that.

You know, you're getting all this advice.

I mean, what do you think?

I think we care for each other a lot, but it's not going to work.

I mean, I'm a public figure.

This town, they won't let it, you know?

It's still a very homophobic town.

Yeah, yeah, you're right.

It is a very homophobic town.

So it's better you date someone that you can pass off as your son.

Is Dr. Montell in?

It's Hector.

Yeah, well, I need to see him.

It's horrible.

It's fucking horrible.

Hello?

So I finally figured out what type you are.

Hi, John.

What type's that?

Well, you're versatile.

Smooth.

Nine uncut.

No fats, no fems, no redheads.

He's cutting me off.

What am I going to do?

You know, I really liked Mark, too.

I don't know what it's like out there, John.

I'm not 18 anymore.

I'm not too worried about you.

You seem like the kind of guy that always lands on his feet.

I do okay.

You're lucky you found me.

I'm a great host.

What do you treats, baby?

No thanks, bro.

I don't need that shit to have a good time.

Hold that for me.

I'm sure it looks good on you.

Hey, guys.

End of the line, fellas.

Rick is in rehab.

Back of the line.

Don't you know who I am?

Darling, I don't even know who you think you are.

Back of the line.

Listen, I'm Hector.

That's who I am.

No, no, fuck that, man.

Come on.

Ah, shut up.

Listen, I'm not going to stand out here tweaking you, all right?

I can feel it.

I can feel it kicking.

I'm not going to fucking stand out here tweaking some waste of your drugs.

Take your shirt off.

Come on, I can see the DJ's assistant.

Take your shirt off.

Come on, I gotta get through.

Coming through.

Hello.

We like waiting, man.

Man, I could play your nipples like CD's.

Play, baby, play.

Come on, you need to get us in.

Follow me.

Come on, let's go.

Hey, come on.

Hey, see you boys inside.

See you.

Get inside.

Hey, Hector, what's up?

Hey, Hector, come on in.

This is my friend John here.

He's a virgin.

Welcome, John.

You boys have a good time.

What's up, Gina?

You let everybody in here for free?

Someone needs to lighten up.

What?

Someone needs to lighten up.

I guess I just feel out of place.

Did your boyfriend leave you alone tonight?

No, he's just a friend.

Let me introduce you to a good friend of mine.

What is it?

Trail mix.

No, thanks.

I don't need that to have a good time.

Let's see.

Not so fast.

Maybe I'll just try one hit.

How do you work it?

It hasn't kicked in yet.

Let me try another one.

Has it kicked in yet?

It hasn't kicked in yet.

That was, um.

..

Uh, wow.

Can I have your number?

Uh, I'm not ready to get serious, man.

A telephone number means serious?

In this town it does.

But you were great.

I'm too skinny for it, aren't I?

No.

Well...

Look, I'm not gonna give you the typical Ellie bullshit.

Be honest with you, as you date bigger guys.

Bodybuilders.

No offense, Jim.

It's John.

Oops.

What are we wasting our time for?

I hate theater.

I'm just doing a favor for my cousin, Tad.

He's filming a documentary.

The way Bobby treated you, I can't stand this guy.

He's so into himself.

He's been after my ass for years.

It's all showing he didn't get under my skin.

Come on.

Well, when I studied law, it was my job to remind people they were in trouble.

Now I, uh, help them forget.

Yeah, well, you said you were closeted for like ten years.

Why would you come out so radically?

Found out I was HIV positive and, um...

Thought I had a limited amount of time left.

Alright, no, I mean, I'll buy that, but, like, what...

Why would you go to the circuit?

It's a gay men's Super Bowl.

It's... it's tribal.

It's fraternal.

The circuit's been my family.

I'm proud to be a leader in the circuit community.

I've never felt so loved or so free.

Turn around if needles make you nervous.

Oh!

No fucking way!

Why do you do it?

I do it for my fans.

They expect a certain image of me.

They pay good money and I don't like to disappoint them.

It's faster than Viagra, believe me.

If I had a dollar for every blowjob I've given...

Well, actually, I do have a dollar for every blowjob I've given.

Are you filming the show?

Uh, just the main act.

I'm doing a documentary.

What is the main act?

I don't know.

I was just hired to do a little stand-up.

Stand-up?

In this club?

You don't know what kind of place this is, do you?

Hey, can I pan to you occasionally during his, uh, routine?

I'm gonna be filming backstage.

Sure.

I'd love it.

Cool.

Okay.

Thank you.

You've been a great audience.

Thank you for the trip.

I drove up here tonight in my new car.

It's incredible.

It's got its electronics up the gazaz.

Amazing.

I mean, it's got a radio.

You tell it what you want to hear and the station comes on.

I said country music and Garth Brooks came on.

I said Oldies and Smokey Robinson came on.

Then a woman cut me off.

I said, you fucking rude bitch!

And Dr. Laura came on.

Oh, I see we're in the right room.

Well, you're gonna love this next act.

Unbelievable guy.

Just amazing.

He's brought his two politically correct friends with

him to do a number that was cut from Annie Gets Your Gun.

But early we're gonna discover that you can get a man with a gun.

Here he is, Bobby Rocks!

Needle in somethin', needle in somethin', needle in somethin', needle in somethin',

needle in somethin' Hey, to everything I say And I promise you

You can make it all

Assume the position Assume the position

You say, you say, you say Needle in somethin', you say, you say You say,

you say, you say Needle in somethin', needle in

somethin', needle in somethin', needle in somethin' Oh,

it's amazing

The grocery store doesn't have a meat section that big.

Hi, I'm Nina.

I'm your stand-up comic for the evening.

Perhaps you saw my name on the poster, the one that read, Big Dick and then Nina.

I have to tell you, though, after seeing that thing, I feel a little hurt.

I feel kind of lied to.

Makes me want to go home and just slap my boyfriend, just smack him.

Motion of the ocean, my ass.

You know, I used to go out to the sky and he's like, yeah, baby, I got ten inches.

And he did.

In the drawer next to his bed.

Johnny?

Hey.

Johnny.

I know you.

Wow.

God, look at you.

Why, do I look different?

Changed a lot?

No, you look exactly the same as in college.

Except maybe a little better.

It's good to see you, too.

Come on, I'll walk you to your car.

No, I said that's fine.

I'm close, you don't have to.

I'm walking you.

Okay.

This is so wonderful.

You make me feel like home again.

You know, I wish we could have some coffee or something.

I got here with a friend, Hector.

A boyfriend, Johnny?

John, come on.

I'll be right there.

An impatient boyfriend?

No, he's just a friend.

Okay, well, thank you.

Okay.

I'm here.

And we'll see each other.

Wait a minute.

Do you need a place to stay?

What?

No.

Of course not.

Oh, the cat?

I have ridden the cat with me to all my shows.

She's a good look, John.

Then what about all the clothes?

Go into the dry cleaners?

You can stay with me as long as you want, okay?

What gave me away?

The cat?

No.

The litter box.

The cat will have to stay indoors.

I'll explain later.

Okay.

Thank you for helping, Hector.

It's really sweet of you.

This is the last one.

Listen, my pager just went off.

Can I use your phone?

Yeah, it's right there.

Who pages someone at 11.15 on a Sunday night?

What is he, a doctor?

No, he's a hustler.

That was my second guess.

The guy just stares right through me.

It makes me feel like Claude Raines.

He'll warm up.

Just be friendly to him.

I get it.

Hector's like tofu.

He just kind of adapts to whatever flavor is nearby.

Exactly.

Granted, you could serve a three-course sit-down meal on

his chest, but aside from that, what do you see in him?

Haven't you ever loved somebody that no one else could understand?

Yeah.

My mom.

You must be a comedian.

Your test results are in.

These new drugs are really promising.

The viral load is undetectable.

You could be around for a real long time, Bobby.

You can get this in Mexico.

You bake it at 375 for 20 minutes.

You see, I made peace with the prospect of dying.

I decided to fulfill every fantasy that I ever had.

Believe me, I have.

I decided to live for today.

The videos, the shows, the pictures.

That's why I started dancing.

You call what you do dancing?

Absolutely.

Dancing with everyone in the audience.

Making love to a hundred men at a time.

And for all the ones I miss, I have my own line

of greeting cards and refrigerator magnets.

Selling yourself to the media is an art form, really.

Now that's a perfect batch of Special K.

What are you going to do with that, Bobby?

I'm going to sell it, I'm going to store it, and we're going to party all night,

baby!

Let's rock and roll!

Pretty powerful, huh?

Why would he just walk out on me?

Maybe he doesn't like Special K.

That shit doesn't mix with alcohol.

Are you for real?

You left me for this guy?

Hey, you can't insult me with your negativity.

I don't give you the power.

Julie, you know him better than I do.

Can you at least talk to him?

I need, like, ten grand to finish.

Thanks.

That was the risk you took?

There were no guarantees.

Sit down.

Now,

no one's happier than I am that you've been given a second chance.

But I bought your life insurance policy because you said you were going to die.

I needed the money.

You needed the money?

I wanted a nice return on my investment.

I think under the circumstances you owe me a refund.

Refund?

I put up my own blood.

At great personal risk.

I paid all the premiums on life and on health.

You had insurance.

You had, um, cash.

You could do whatever the fuck you wanted.

Look, a deal's a deal.

I'm sorry you gambled and you lost, but...

I don't even have the money to give you if I wanted to.

I thought this wasn't your scene.

Well, maybe my scene is changing.

I mean, everybody seems so big in this town.

You think you're ready?

Let's go upstairs.

You know, I don't... You know what?

I don't know, Papi.

You're only young and beautiful once, baby.

Just a few golden years.

With a little more size, you were gonna be a star out there, John.

So... hot.

You know what that feels like?

Everyone wanting you?

Nobody will ever mess with you again, okay?

These are pharmaceutical.

They're very clean.

Black gold.

Lay down.

Okay, I'm gonna try one cycle only, just to put on a little size.

Yeah, right.

Don't be shy.

All right, I want you to breathe in.

You're gonna feel a tiny prick.

You know how we hate those, baby.

God, that hurts.

What's with the face?

See, my implants are moving.

I look like a Picasso.

You are gonna be so beautiful, John.

I may end up breaking my rule.

What rule is that?

Oh, baby.

We've gotta upgrade your image.

Come on, let me just get some pictures of you walking.

I don't wanna be interviewed, okay?

I just wanna shoot you walking.

I know.

Let me just ask you one personal question, I'll take it.

No.

All right, good.

You're pretty open about your career, right?

Do hustlers ever fall in love with their John?

Is that thing on?

Can a hustler really fall in love at all?

Are you desensitized?

Hey, you have a crush on John?

What the fuck?

What the fuck?

John was just this plain skinny guy, unassuming, who wanted to be a cop.

He was not just nice, he was kind.

He treasured me.

And it killed him to tell me that he was gay.

Cause he didn't wanna hurt me.

And I've not found that again with another man.

Oh, it's you.

Hey, Hector, you know what?

I'm Nina.

I'm the person standing right in front of you who's talking to you.

Cool, huh?

Is John here?

No.

But you can come in and wait if you like.

I'm cooking, you can have some.

Excuse me, Hector?

Why don't you come out here and keep me company?

Look, I don't care what you're doing.

I really don't.

Besides, Johnny tells me everything.

And I'm not one to judge.

What the hell are those?

Steroids.

Are those safe?

I mean, you always hear about how they're messing with your personality.

Well, I've been using them on and off for six years.

I'm no different.

Oh, so you've always been this funny.

Can I ask you something?

Are you jealous of me?

Because my relationship with John was over years ago.

Well, that and he's gay.

If John tells you anything, he probably told you that I don't like women.

Or ugly men.

It's nothing personal.

Hey, sweetie.

Hey, you look cute.

You know, hot date.

Has he been waiting long?

Oh, he's on pins and needles.

Needles, mostly.

Johnny, let me introduce you to Carol.

I'm a little hopped up.

That's the juice.

Here, take a Xanax.

We can coast until we get to the club.

Now what?

She won't come in.

Good.

Because nobody can know about this.

Wait, hey.

Shit.

Papi, I don't do heavy drugs.

Yeah, I really don't.

This is just too much, okay?

I'm an ex-cop, for Christ's sake.

Would you shut up?

It's not heroin.

Is it makeup?

No, no, no.

These are the best cosmetics money can buy.

I had a friend who worked for Cher.

Anyway, blah, blah, blah.

Enough about me.

How long have you been a lawyer, Andy?

Well, for three...

Guys, I would like for you to meet my date, Andy French.

Hi, nice to meet you.

Hello.

This is my roommate, John, and his friend.

Nice to meet you.

And they're on their way to the club for a mitzvah.

Actually, no.

They're going to be in the community production of Cats.

Actually, Andy French, we're going to the Probe.

Oh.

Nice to meet you, gentlemen.

Yes, nice to meet you too, Andy.

Hey, take good care of her, okay?

See you later, Nina.

What's, um, with the Probe?

Okay,

let's rock and roll.

Fuck.

A little hypocritical, don't you think?

What are you getting at, Louise?

You sell the drugs, which compromise judgment, which causes the unprotected

sex, and contributes to AIDS in these younger kids.

We give them the condoms, don't we?

They throw the condoms away, Gino.

How did you feel when you heard about the HIV, Bobby?

Like shit.

The year that followed, I maxed out my credit cards.

I started writing my own will.

I declared bankruptcy.

I started planning my own funeral.

But now I'm not going anywhere, so I want to start over again.

Get out of the sex scene.

Quit doing drugs.

Maybe even go back to school.

Oh, this is perfect.

This is perfect.

I don't know why this is a white party.

What do you think, Dan?

Huh?

This is perfect.

What a rich character.

I want to apologize for my behavior from before.

I've just been so damn frustrated by this horrible plague, you know?

Lost so many of my wonderful friends.

I'd be happy to advance you to five grand.

In fact, I want to see every piece of footage that you shoot from here on out.

This story is terribly compelling.

I have great news.

We have to talk.

Okay, okay, but let me go first.

That's what I want to tell you.

I want you to go.

What?

I want you guys to move.

I want my house back.

We can't afford to live like this on our own.

Tell that to Stevie Wonder.

Oh, can I at least finish my film?

Tad, you've been working on that documentary for two years.

I know, but now I almost have all the money I need to finish it.

Then I know you have first and last.

Can we at least wait until after the White Party?

He makes a fortune on that weekend.

Look, I'm not asking you as a friend, okay?

I'm asking you as an artist.

I've got to finish my project.

Yo, Gino.

I need to talk to you about a loan.

What the fuck am I, the Bank of West Hollywood?

Why are you limping?

Careful, please.

Gino, I... I need another operation.

What is it this time, a beetle implant?

We can't all be as naturally hung as Bobby.

How well do you know Bobby?

He's always been after my ass.

Even wants me to perform with him.

With or without an audience.

You ever have sex with him?

No.

I don't have sex for free.

I'll pay you to have sex with him.

What, do you want to watch?

I thought you were straight.

I'll fracture the money under one condition.

You have sex with him at the White Party.

Sometime over that weekend.

And you let me supply the treats.

You seem kind of... You seem kind of different than his other friends.

You've been friends with John for a long time, right?

Yeah.

Then I guess you know he's in trouble.

Yeah.

Never look better.

Or seem more unstable.

Three times, Johnny, but you're the most action this old girl's going to get tonight.

Get out of here.

I'm so close.

Next in line.

Wait, wait, wait.

Come here.

Excuse me.

You know we don't allow drugs here.

Oh, come on.

Give me a break.

You know what kind of party this is.

Very sexy, though.

Come on.

It's Miller time.

Caught ya.

Would you believe allergy medicine?

We've met before, you know.

You're Johnny Webster from Illinois.

You don't remember me, do you?

Remember?

You caught me with my pants down in an alley one night and... That wasn't me.

You let me off, but I never got the chance to thank you for that.

I'm telling you, it wasn't me, okay?

So...

Just get out of here, huh?

Yes, it was you.

Get the fuck out of here!

You didn't come home again last night.

Was it a party?

Hey, John.

Lately, it seems like you're always at a party.

Maybe you should take some down time.

Johnny boy.

How's it going?

Good, man.

And you?

A man.

Remember?

Remember.

We had a party last night.

You know, there's some really good movies out lately.

I was thinking that maybe we could go.

Hey, bud.

What did you know?

Not much, boss.

Okay, how do you know so many people?

They're circuit boys.

So what does that make you?

I guess one of them.

No, no.

You are so much more than a circus boy.

Circuit boy.

Whatever.

You graduated with honors.

You have skills that can save lives.

And thus far, have been one of the great loves of my life.

I can give that up.

I can support you.

Live in your life whatever way you want to live it, but not this.

Not the circus.

Circuit.

Circus.

I remember going to my very first circus party in Atlanta called Hotlanta.

And I remember being in the sea of gorgeous men.

And out of the corner of my eye, I spotted my shrink doing special K.

How do you go back to your shrink after you've seen him in a K-hole?

Okay.

Okay, so just act natural.

Okay.

Ask you questions about the circuit, okay?

Yeah.

Okay.

Okay.

Wait a minute.

Cool?

Okay.

So, John, what's the biggest difference between back home and L.A.?

Wow.

I mean, it's like, it's, it's, it's like, um...

It's like L.A.

It's like L.A.

It's the, it's like the guys.

And the music, you know.

The jams, you know.

What?

What?

What did you ask me?

John, it's one o'clock in the afternoon.

Are you high?

No!

Oh, well, yeah.

I had a little bump.

Strong K.

John, it's okay to party, man, but you've

got to learn to deal with it in small doses.

Hey, hey, I've worked my fucking ass off my whole life, okay?

This is my time.

This is my summer vacation.

I just want to have a little fun.

Is that so wrong?

No, but that shit is dangerous, okay?

Look, I at least know how to handle it.

Fuck you!

Yeah, you handled it real well.

Cost you a relationship with Gil.

I think John was clearly not ready, uh, for what he was gonna face in L.A.

And he came with a small t... This is fucking ridiculous.

Where are you going?

Green party.

Good night.

You're not driving, are you?

Sure.

Come in.

Do a rat's tail.

Hey.

Did you do these?

In another life.

These are beautiful.

Why'd you give it up?

Every client I had wanted to fuck me.

Now I still charge, but I save on film.

Come over here.

Let me introduce you to Tina.

Hey.

Nothing.

I'm still flying.

I'm not ready to go home yet.

How you doing?

God,

I feel so good right now.

Hey.

Oh, this is my favorite hotel.

My best customer's in town.

He likes to watch another couple.

You into it?

Uh, it's kind of late.

I'm pretty tired.

All right, I'll call someone else.

What's he look like?

You won't see him.

I've never even seen him.

But it's five hundred each.

He's a lookalike to me.

Listen, you don't mind if I go?

I'll only be like an hour.

Maybe you can pick me up later.

Let's go.

All right, it's a suite.

We're gonna go into the bedroom and take our clothes off.

He'll be in the bathroom.

Don't say anything and don't look at him.

He likes me to be on top.

Yeah, right.

Bastard.

What makes you think I can be a bottom?

Just a hunch.

Listen, let me leave.

When it's over, we'll get dressed, we'll get

our clothes on, we'll get the fuck out of here.

Listen, baby, don't worry.

I'll take care of you, all right?

It's okay, babe.

It's okay, John.

Just relax.

What's wrong?

Nothing.

Nothing?

This is... Thanks.

This is great.

Are you okay?

Yeah, of course.

I mean, it was fun.

It was a lot of fun, right?

Right.

I mean, we finally made it together, baby.

It was so hard, John.

You wanna go to an after-hours?

No, thanks, man.

I just got this splitting headache, so I think I'm just gonna head home.

You wanna come in?

You won't be able to sleep.

You actually like doing this, don't you?

Because this is, like, the only way you can get off.

Well, I don't do anything I don't wanna do.

I'm not ashamed of my life.

What are you doing in there?

Get the fuck out!

God damn it!

You son of a bitch!

Johnny?

God damn it!

What are you doing?

What are you...

What did you do?

God damn it!

Jesus fucking Christ!

John, stop it!

I can't fucking believe this shit!

Leave him alone!

God damn it!

He's so...

Fuck you!

Johnny, stop it!

You son of a bitch!

My dad told me to tell you!

You fucking...

Fuck!

You're such a fucking...

Give him a gun!

I had an abusive boyfriend.

And it was safer on the streets.

You know, that way he couldn't find me.

Do you think you could ever end up in a situation like that again?

Impossible.

Like I've got anywhere else to go.

Hello.

Hey.

It's John.

What's wrong with your voice?

I thought you might like to come over.

Well, I was about to go for a run.

You want to come with me?

Right over here.

That's for me.

What are you doing?

What do you think I'm doing?

I think you're hot.

You're tweaking.

Do you really think this is flattering?

What's the matter, baby?

Huh?

Are you playing hard to get?

Johnny, you are a terrific person.

And if you only knew how I dreamed about getting close to you.

So go ahead.

Get close to me.

Not like this.

We have to talk.

You guys have until the end of the month to find a new place.

You said we could wait until after the white party.

Well, I'm changing to the plaid party.

And that's next week.

Thank God I came to my senses.

There's no such thing as a plaid party.

Could you help me here?

Hey.

Nina, I said I was sorry, okay?

This hasn't been me lately.

So, um...

Just come on back inside.

Is this everything?

Yeah.

Why are you doing this?

I mean, I don't...

I don't want you to move out.

You don't have to move out.

Yes, I do.

You're getting worse.

And I'm not gonna hang around and watch.

Have a couple of bad days and all of a sudden you're bailing?

You are fucking fooling yourself.

You know that?

Your life is going to shit.

You're trashing your body.

You're out all night, every night.

And all you can think about is when the next party is.

You don't want my help?

Fine.

Don't take it.

You should only get it from somebody.

Because at the rate you're going, there's not gonna be very many parties left.

I can show you addicts in the circuit and addicts in the Catholic Church.

I get tired when people pinpoint drug addiction on the circuit parties.

I get pissed when the critics all blame everything on the sex and the drugs.

My lover and I are completely monogamous.

We don't even touch narcotics.

On a scale of one to ten?

A ten.

This is really good, Ted.

How much do you need to finish it?

Another five grand.

Ah, gee, Ted, I'm sorry.

I'm all tapped out.

But I would like to see some more footage of Bobby, though.

What?

Well, you're just gonna have to take care of Mommy until I get there.

Tomorrow.

In the afternoon.

Ask Mommy if you can come to the airport.

Okay.

Yes.

All right.

Look, when I get back tomorrow, we'll go to FAO Sports.

You can pick out anything you want.

Okay.

Within reason.

Uh, yeah, you can go on the website now.

Uh, list four.

I gotta go now.

Um...

No, just tell Mommy that I'll see her at the terminal tomorrow.

I love you, too.

Okay.

Bye.

Um...

This isn't gonna work.

You're way too old.

Well, fuck you, too.

You're a fucking hooker!

John, it's me.

Pick up.

John, pick up the fucking phone!

John, please, you gotta pick up.

I'm desperate here.

Look, I'm sorry I blew with you, John, but

you gotta understand, you've got everything.

You know, you're educated.

You're smart.

You have friends.

Now, I never had any of...

I don't feel anything.

I don't feel anything, John.

I don't feel anything.

I don't feel anything.

I came to apply for a job.

Gil, thanks for helping me, man.

I really needed the work.

You are welcome.

I needed you.

I mean, I needed the help.

So, how did you get through it?

Through what?

I don't know.

Being gay.

Having all this incredible freedom.

How come you didn't get caught up in the big, bad circuit?

I had my party days, believe me.

Remember disco?

Well, things were more covert back then.

You really felt like you were getting away with something.

Nowadays, you have to party harder, get higher just to capture the same feeling.

Did you ever want to relive those days?

It gets repetitive after a while.

And I wanted to focus on more long-term things.

That's when I started dating Tad.

Oh.

I'm a bottom.

Why is there such a stigma about being a bottom?

I think 90% of West Hollywood?

Bottoms.

What?

What's wrong?

I quit the Jews, so my body feels soft.

It doesn't feel soft to me.

I can't make love unless my body's perfect.

It's so fucked up.

We can just hold each other for now.

Okay?

Simple.

It's so good to have you back, baby.

You want to go out later?

No, thanks.

I can't.

I got plans with Gil.

I take it you're not digging ditches today?

No, I got my meeting with Gino.

The White Party's next week.

I told him I'd supervise security.

You work in another party?

Yeah.

I mean, I can make over two grand.

Jesus, John.

You won't survive the weekend.

You'll be right back where you started.

I don't get it.

I need to pay rent, Gil.

I'll loan you the money for rent.

It's old patterns, Marlene.

No matter how low I've sunk, I'm just not going to borrow money.

I'm a big boy.

Yeah, I've noticed that.

And I'm not looking for a daddy.

Screw you.

I am not that old.

I'm going to be okay, Gil.

And so are we.

You clearly know how to deal with this, do you?

With what?

With this.

With this crummy apartment.

With me.

With your whole fucking phony spiritual new age millennial bullshit.

You know you spin records for a bunch of drugged out circuit

queens who might as well be dancing to a train wreck.

You know what?

You're one of them.

But you're afraid to admit it.

No, I'm not.

I'm a filmmaker.

No, you're one of them.

You know what's sad?

Is you're getting old, Tad.

You hide behind your camera because you're afraid to face people.

Fuck you.

Why are you even making this movie?

I'm watching guys die out there.

We're killing ourselves.

That's why I'm doing it.

Come here.

Please.

Hi, honey.

Listen, I was out running some errands today and I wanted to give you this.

What is it?

Use it for your little documentary, okay?

I gotta go.

I got a lot more to do.

Okay.

Do me a favor.

Would you keep this between us?

Okay.

Car's picking you up in ten minutes.

You have a suite at the hotel.

The security's ours, but you have to be very, very discreet.

Always discreet, baby.

How about that other Matt and Bobby thing?

You take care of that?

Make your arrangements?

The arrangements are made.

Okay.

Now this.

You gotta be very, very careful with this.

This is for Bobby only.

This could kill somebody, right?

And what do you have for me?

A post-dated wire transfer order and an airline ticket.

Discretion is of the utmost importance.

Would you miss me if I left you?

Where do you think you're going?

Nowhere.

I was just wondering.

Did a lot of thinking about my life when we had our little problem.

We worked it out.

Yeah, we did.

I think this is my last circuit party.

Good.

You should concentrate on your photography, man.

You're very talented, Hector.

I really fucked things up between us, didn't I?

No.

Have you heard Manny's new track?

I love you, John.

Well, I'm a VR nurse and I deal with tragedy all day long.

So, I like to come here, kick back and relax.

You know, be in an environment where I'm not judged.

And, you know, the circuit works for me.

Well, the drugs, they make me feel horny, but they give me a lot of energy.

But frankly, they inhibit my sexual performance.

Well, thank God for the drugs.

I mean, drugs promote safe sex.

All right, sweet babies, who wants to place an order?

Hello?

What am I doing here?

What am I doing here?

You're making good sense.

It's mobbed here.

Anybody better looking than me?

Uh, pretty much everybody.

Oh, good.

Well, I know you can never make up your mind.

What would you say if I asked you to join me?

Well, having nothing to do with what I really want

to do, I think we should stick to the original plan.

Yeah, I guess you're right.

I'll be home if you want to talk.

I'll be in the bar with about 6,000 gorgeous horny men if you need to talk, okay?

Hello?

Is it hard yet?

So why don't you come over and warm me up before my show?

I'll come over afterwards to cool you down.

I'll have more time then.

Okay, my little prick tease.

I'll see you then.

Nice to see you too.

You have fun now.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Have a good time.

Folks, we've got two minutes for the show to start.

I'm not ready yet.

The show is starting in a minute and 30 seconds.

I'm going to have the DJ cue the music.

Yeah, can you hear me out there?

DJ, cue the song.

There we go.

Okay, just cue it now.

It'll be out in a minute.

Bobby, what's the matter, man?

Can you listen to me?

What the hell?

That's shit.

Are you ready back there in the bathroom?

I need more time.

Okay, thanks, Bobby.

We're going to go in one minute.

Everybody okay?

Everybody got what you need?

Everybody get their makeup on.

Okay, we're getting ready.

Okay, Bobby, how's it coming?

Are you ready to go?

Dancers?

No, no, put that down.

That does not go out on stage.

Hey, Chad.

I need your help.

Yeah.

Five, four, three... Let's rock and roll.

Everybody, let's go, let's go, let's go.

Come on, high energy.

Get it up, get it up, get it up.

Out, out, out, out, out, out, out, out, out.

Let's go, let's go, let's go tonight.

Let's go tonight, let's go.

Okay, here we go.

The white party proudly welcomes the king of the circuit in his final performance.

Bobby Rock.

We nearly sold out.

There's even more people than last year.

Jesus, you dumb fuck.

Come on, help me pick this up.

You pick it up.

And I know about Bobby, too.

What do you know about Bobby?

I know you bet on his life like a fast horse.

And you lost.

I helped Bobby out of a jam.

A hundred other insurance companies would have done the same thing.

It was lost.

And there were others, too.

You don't know shit about Bobby.

Oh, yes, I do.

He told me everything.

I'm leaving, Gino.

No, you're leaving me.

I'm leaving you.

If you touch me, I swear I'll kill you.

It's tribal.

It's fraternal.

It's like the gay men's Super Bowl.

They're like my family.

What a rush.

Alright.

So that's it for you, Bobby, man.

The rest happens in the editing room.

Well, all I've done is talk about myself.

I didn't ask anything about you.

What about you, Ted?

Are you a circuit boy, too?

No, I'm not.

I'm a filmmaker.

You know, I'm recording them.

I love it out there.

You know, you're out there with your friends.

And even the guys who aren't your friends are all of a sudden your friends.

It's like flying, you know.

Yeah.

So, yeah.

Yeah, I guess I'm a circuit boy.

You know what, man?

There's nothing wrong with that.

Damn right there's nothing wrong with that.

Fuck all those judgmental bastards, man.

Worth the wait?

You bet.

Come on in.

A few surprises.

You wanna party first?

Let's start with the K.

Hey,

have you seen Hector?

He okay?

Just saw him a minute ago out back by the pool.

He's fine.

Party without an OD.

Hello?

He's got a serious problem.

I want everybody out of this club right now.

Not if you are.

I'm talking to this mozo right here.

He's gonna shut us down.

I have a deal with the city.

You can't shut me down.

I want everybody and all your pretty boys out of here.

You can't shut me down, you motherfucker.

The party.

I feel the party.

It's people.

It's one for each of us, baby.

So do we celebrate it.

It's my birthday today.

Surprise.

Yeah?

How old?

I just turned 30.

You're so beautiful.

You saved my life tonight.

More than you'll ever know.

The party's over.

Wake up.

Hector, wake up.

Oh, fuck.

Hector, can you hear me?

Overdose.

I'm so sorry.

Bobby and I were such good friends.

I don't know what...

He was...

I

just assumed that...

What the hell?

What the hell?

This may be tough.

I love you.

Go ahead.

The circuit saved my life.

I mean, a regular person wouldn't understand that.

But the music and the people really keeps me going.

It's validating, it's sexy, it's hot.

Get anybody I want.

Well, I'm out of it now, but...

I really like the way it made me feel, you know?

It was...

It was very seductive.

You saw me standing alone in the dark Lost in the silence of my heart Crying for

angels, crying for light Crying for someone tonight

No time for wasting, no time for truth No time for innocent lies Touch me like he

rose straight from your eyes Sometimes I feel like...

I feel like there's nothing going on inside.

I hate that.

Haven't you ever loved someone that no one else could understand?

Secrets in the dark Love in the shadows Passion burning out from under my skin

Take me for a ride Until the night time's over Daylight steals the magic of the dark

I need secrets in the dark Love in the shadows

I may need Love

Another secret in my life Another day I have

to fight What should I ask myself this time?

Are you the one to break these chains?

Cause I don't ever wanna hurt again Give me the time to just believe How

many times before I win?

How many chances do I have to take?

Where could I turn from for me?

To break the spell, to make the change How many loves?

Seems like a lifetime passed me by And I don't need

another reason why Why should compromise myself?

So why don't you say there's no one else?

It's only truth that I will hear you tell Don't break my heart, don't make me leave

I have to take Where will I go to set me free?

How many loves are gonna

make the change?

How many loves are gonna take the pain?

How many loves?

To

make the change How many

times to just believe?

Oversee and fly

in places Footsteps slide down and down I go

and I open the hills Oh, won't you wait for me?

Oh, won't you wait, won't you wait?

Oh, won't you wait for me?

As

darkness falls I dance in shadow shapes And colors right on the wings Of time