All language subtitles for young-adult-yify-english

I'm just...
I don't feel pretty right now.

Having my friends here is great,
but it's like,

making my self-esteem
go down really bad.

And they look so good,
and they're just like,

like the hottest girls in the world,
and here I am just like...

...and you're...
- Babe.

I got to get ready.
- No, you don't. Come here.

That's just it.
- What?

Kendra, you are
the most beautiful woman.

And don't let anybody
coming around...

...after you just had a baby,
make you not feel that way, babe.

You want that?

All right, come on. Follow me.

Kendal Strickland wasn't just
the prettiest girl at Waverley Prep,

she was a legend.

As a junior, the student council voted
to dedicate the yearbook to her,

even though another
student had recently died.

Hey, Mavis, it's Jim again.
Just callin' to bug you.

We need that draft of Waverley 178.

We can work with something rough.
Last one, sweetheart.

I know you can do it.
Hopefully by Friday?

When you send something that soon,
it's for the inner circle.

It's not for the ex-girlfriend of the
father who doesn't talk to him anymore.

Frankly,
that's a slap in the face. Right?

You seem a little overly
worked up about this.

I am not worked up in the slightest.

I was just trying to tell you
about something that happened. God!

Well, good for them, right?

Buddy seems like he'd be
a decent parent.

Can you imagine
still living in Mercury?

Trapped with a wife and a kid,
and some crappy job?

It's like...

It's like he's a hostage.

Yup. We're lucky we got out.

Yes.
- We have lives.

Let me let you borrow an outfit
'cause that dress is hideous, honey.

I'm excited that Kourtney is gonna come
with me now to the TV Guide party

because who wants to go
to a party by themselves?

It's to die for.
- That is fab.

I just think
that Tyler and I are like soul twins.

You know? Right before he texts me,

it's like I can...
- Sense it?

Yes! Like psychically.

It's like we have chemistry,
even over our phones.

Like text chemistry.

Exactly.

Just as Kendal hit "send," a message
from Ryan popped up like magic.

It couldn't be denied.

They had "textual chemistry."

So, all told, I spent a year
in Southeast Asia.

Why?

Long story short, I ended up
a volunteer teacher in Phnom Penh.

Oh, my God. Yikes.

Yeah, it was probably one of the most
rewarding things I've ever done.

Of course.

Sure, totally.

I didn't want to hurt you

Oh, yeah

Dolce, take a pee.

Dolce, pee.

She wears denim wherever she goes

Says she's gonna get some records
by the Status Quo

Oh, yeah

I didn't want to hurt you

Oh, yeah

Welcome to Hampton Inn.
Do you have a reservation?

No.

Mavis...

...Gary.

Is that a dog in your bag?
- Nope.

We actually allow small pets
with a cleaning deposit.

Good, because I have a small dog,

in my vehicle.

I'll put that you have a dog.

How many keys do you need?

Two, please.

Expecting company?

Hi. You.

Personal.

Mercury, Minnesota.

Slade.

I can't.
There's nothing I can do for you.

I love Mason more than I love you.

Hey, Buddy, this is Mavis.

Remember? Mavis Gary?

I'm in town for this
little real estate thing,

and I... I don't know,
I just thought if you have time,

and you wanna grab a drink, catch up?

Something like that.

All right, well, listen,
call me and... and let me know.

All right, bye.

Fuck.

Hey, Buddy.
- Mavis Gary.

It's been... how long?
- I'm not sure.

Gosh. Wow.

So you're actually back in town, huh?

Yeah, well, I'm just passing through.

I am insanely busy as always.

Well, I don't know
how long you're around

with your real estate thing,
but I'd love to grab a drink.

OK.

Well, if you're feeling spontaneous,

I could meet you at Woody's in...

...I don't know, 15 minutes?

Spontaneous really isn't
a thing these days.

I don't know if you heard,
but I am a new dad.

Everyone knows. Yeah, the whole gang.

I got that announcement.

Thanks for that, by the way.
- You're welcome, you're welcome.

How about we meet tomorrow

at this place called
Champion O'Malley's?

It's kind of fun.
- Of course, yes. Yeah.

How does 8:00, 8:30 sound?

6:00 would be better.
- 6:00 is perfect.

Great, I'll see you at 6:00.

Maker's Mark.

What?

I'm sorry, but I think
we went to high school together.

At the same time?
- Yeah.

You're Mavis Gary?

Mavis Gary-Crane now.

I'm Matt Freehauf.

My locker was actually next to yours,

all through high school.

Matt... Freehauf.

Yeah.

Yeah, your locker was right there.

Right next to mine.

We didn't run in the same circles.

You were pretty popular,
if I remember correctly.

You won "Best Hair."

Did I?
What did you win?

I didn't.

They usually give out,
like, 15 of those,

and only to the same five people.

Yeah, well, listen, Matt,
it was really nice seeing you...

What are you doing back
in Mercury? You move back?

Of course not. Gross.

No, I live in Minneapolis.

I'm just here taking care
of a little real estate thing.

I own some property...
- I read in the Sun you're a writer.

Yes, I am an author.

Children's books.

Y.A. That's industry speak
for "Young Adult."

It's a very popular teen series.

It's everywhere. It's huge.

You've probably seen it.
- Vampires?

Hey, take that, liver.

Weren't you that hate crime guy?

Excuse me?

You totally were.

You're the hate crime guy.

Oh, my God.
Why didn't you just say that?

Now I know who you are.

Matt, the hate crime guy.

Yes, Mavis. When I was a...

When we were seniors,

a bunch of jocks who thought
I was gay jumped me in the woods...

That's right.

...and hit me on the legs
and dick with a crowbar.

With a crowbar. I totally remember that.

It was national news.

I mean, until people found out
that I wasn't really gay.

Then it wasn't a hate crime anymore.

It was a fat guy getting his ass beat.

Didn't you get to miss
a bunch of school?

Yes, I got to miss about six months.
It was awesome.

Fuck. How's your dick?

Not good. Not good.

Does it work?
- Yeah, it works.

You know, it's just kind of does a...

Hard Jacks.

Do you know who drinks these?

I don't.

Buddy Slade.

That's an interesting fact.

Come here.

Do you wanna know
why I'm really in town?

Yes.

I can't tell you in here.

OK, you got me out here.

All right.

Here's the deal.

Buddy Slade and I are
meant to be together.

And I'm here to get him back.
- Buddy Slade. All right.

I'm pretty sure he's married
with a kid on the way.

No, kid's here. She already had it.

I'm cool with it.
I mean, I've got baggage too.

So wait, are you not joking?

Oh, God, Matt, I get it.
People won't understand.

But you know, these things happen.
In real life, they actually happen.

They just tend to happen in slow motion.

They get divorced, they reconfigure,
and society is, like, fine with that...

...if you take your time,
like an emotional glacier. I'm 37...

Mavis, I would keep
all of this to yourself.

I would find a therapist.
Talk to a professional.

Matt.
- Oh, boy.

Don't you get it?

Love conquers all.

Have you not seen The Graduate?

Or, like, I don't know, anything?

Oh, a taxi.

Yes, we called it.

Mavis, hey!

Buddy Slade has a life.

Buddy Slade has a life. No, he has
a baby, and babies are boring!

Having spent the summer
outside Waverley Prep,

Kendal looked around
at her fellow students, thinking,

"Did I really get that much better,
or did everyone simply get worse?

Why was Ryan spending so much time
with this dumpy new girl?"

Mavis, this is Jim.
Do you even have any pages?

I'm trying to help you,
but I can't if you...

Says she likes my hair
'cause it's down my back

Says she likes the group
'cause we pull in the slack

Oh, yeah

Oh, no, not gonna need those.

You're gonna wanna
try the popcorn shrimp.

No, I'm not.
A couple of Hard Jacks, please.

OK.

Hey.

Hey, you.

Wow.
- Great to see you.

So...

This is quite the mid-week surprise.

Hey, I ordered us
a couple of Hard Jacks.

I haven't had one of those
since college.

I know, me neither.

But I thought, just for old times' sake.

Actually, I haven't
been drinking recently.

Because during Beth's pregnancy,
and now that she's nursing our girl,

I thought I'd show some solidarity.

Right.

So...

You still at General Mills?
- Yeah.

Ad sales now.

My dad's still there,
so we have lunch together most days.

Yeah. Pizza or sub sandwiches.

Awesome.

I've just been working
my little butt off in the city.

You know, doing my thing.

Down there in the old Mini Apple?

God, Buddy. Nobody calls it
the Mini Apple anymore.

I didn't know.

I'll go grab those Hard Jacks.

Give our waitress a break.

So chivalrous.

Mavis.

What are you doing here?

I work here.

You know, bookkeeping,
dealing with vendors.

Here's the better question.
What are you doing here?

Just catching up with a friend.

Oh, catching up with a friend.

There's Buddy Slade,

acquiring a couple
of mind-erasers at the bar.

You're not wasting any time, are you?

Look, it was really great hanging out
with you last night.

It was great.
- OK.

Yep.
- Hey, Freehauf.

What's up, man?
- Hey, hey.

Congrats on the little one.
- Oh, thanks.

What a wonderful,
permanent commitment to make.

Yeah.
- Yeah.

A ton of work though.
Almost no sleep, right?

Sometimes I feel like a zombie.

But hey, it's so rewarding, right?

Yeah.

It's so nice running into him.

Thanks for stopping by, Matt.

Yeah, you're welcome, yeah.

You wanna join us for a round?

I would love to. I would.

Sadly, I have work to do,
and it takes me twice as long

as an able-bodied person to complete
even the simplest task.

So...
- Bummer.

I don't wanna step on
your Mercury High reunion. So...

Go, go, Injuns.

Actually, they changed the name
to "Indians" back in '99, remember?

The local Fond du Lac tribe...

did a whole thing with...

It sucks, what happened to Matt.

That poor guy suffered so much
just for being gay.

He's not actually gay.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure he is.
- No.

Didn't you call him a theater fag
all the time in high school?

"Theater fag" is an expression, Buddy.

Well, whatever.

Mercury's changed a lot
since then, though.

We're way less of a hick town.

Really?

Yeah, we've got this place.
It beats Woody's, right?

And we're getting
a new Chipotle at the mall.

And I noticed you got a KenTacoHut.

You know, one of those Kentucky
Fried Chicken, Taco Bell...

Pizza Hut.
- Yeah.

That's genius. KenTacoHut.

You sound like one
of your crazy characters.

Hey, so how's Allen?

Allen is great. Yeah.

Yeah, he's good.

We're not married anymore, but...

Oh, sorry. I didn't...

No, don't be sorry.
It's good. It's fine.

Well, that's Allen's loss.

It sucks to be Allen.

Sorry I can't stay any longer.
I gotta go relieve Beth.

She's got band practice tonight.

Beth's in a band?
- Yeah.

Just something she does
with the other moms.

Wow, cool.

Yeah, Beth's the drummer.

Oh, my God. Embarrassing.

Actually, her band's
playing here tomorrow night.

Hey, why don't you come over tomorrow
night to our house for a hang?

We can have dinner, and then
come here and see Beth's show.

I would love that.
- Yeah.

Oh, this is kind of silly,

but would you mind signing one
of those Waverley Place books for me?

Sure.

I mean, it's not for me, obviously.

It's for my niece, Kendra.

She wants to be a writer someday.

Right, of course.

But you know, my name isn't
actually on the books.

I mean, it's on the title page
if you check inside.

But I'm basically a ghostwriter.

It's still a pretty big deal,
compared to the rest of us.

It was so great seeing you.

I always feel like we can
pick up right where we left off.

Exactly.

You know what? You look the same.

I do?

Yeah, it's like the rest of us changed,
you just got lucky.

I'll see you tomorrow.
- Yeah, great.

OK.
- Good night.

Hello?

Look, I just want you to know

that what you think you saw tonight
is not what it was, OK?

Oh, so you're not trying
to destroy Buddy Slade's marriage.

It is way more complicated than you
can possibly ever understand, OK?

Buddy Slade and I have
years and years of history,

and it is very rich, and very complex.

Wow, yeah, that sounds
way beyond my comprehension.

Don't open a new ranch
till the old one's done.

What?
- That's my sister. Forget it.

Just so you know.
- I got it. Thank you.

Do you want to get loaded, or something?

I'm Mavis.

I know. From high school.

Right.

I made you those Rice Krispies squares
that one time for your birthday.

I got your locker combination
from the vice principal.

I put them in your locker?

Thank you.

So where's Matt?
- In his cave.

Welcome to the distillery.

Are you making moonshine?

Screw you, hillbilly.
This is aged bourbon.

You know what? Hang on.

All right. Check this out.

This is an eight-year, all right?
Now take a sniff.

Not too deep, though.
It's got a really strong...

That's a limited... There's not a lot.

"Mos Easily Special Reserve."
- Eisley.

Mos Eisley... Star Wars thing.

You know, the Cantina?
You know, let's...

Let's let that age a little longer.

And I got another in here.

OK.

Now, see if you can detect...

...some of the new oak.

Oh, come on.
- OK.

They're kind of hidden in there.

So when you sip...

I was supposed to sip it?
- Yeah.

Let's do a little...

There you go.

Woody.

Oak.

So how'd the rest
of your little date go?

Good. It was eye-opening.
- Yeah?

I mean, Buddy's clearly not happy.

OK, he actually said that?

He implied it.

You can tell, he's totally suffering.

He looks completely exhausted.

You know he told me
he feels like a zombie.

I was there, all right?
I suspect he was being flip.

That's a pretty strong
statement to make.

I mean, a zombie is
a dead person, not...

Mavis, I'm a fat geek, all right?
I know what a zombie is.

I think Buddy and I are
having very similar feelings.

The question is,
who's gonna make the first move?

I'm thinking... it will be you.

Aren't you a little old for G. I. Joes?
- That one's still wet.

No, it's fine. Jesus.

You make these?
- I combine them, mix and match.

That one... I took Copperhead's face,
and I put it on Mongul's body,

so it's like a beefed-up Copperhead,

and then I added Doctor Mid-Nite's owl.

I was tired and drunk.

You ever make, like, girl dolls?

I'm not a weirdo.

I have to go check on something.

Oh, OK.

No, no, no. You need to come with me.

I think this is it.

You think, or you know?

This is definitely it.
He drives a Jeep Liberty.

That's ironic...
because he has no liberty.

You're fuckin' mentally ill.

You see that window up there?
- Yep.

I bet Buddy is awake...

...jerking off or something.

Or perhaps he's caring
for his infant daughter.

The baby, the baby.

The problem that has no name.

Can I help you find something?

Sure, I'm not having
a ton of luck here.

Is this something for work?
- No, it's a special occasion.

It's not a formal occasion.

I'm looking for something chic, clean,
but also a bit edgy.

OK. We have some adorable
new dresses that just came in.

Yeah, do you have Marc Jacobs?
- No, I don't think we have that one.

I'm going to a rock concert
with an old flame,

and I think there is a chance
we may reconnect.

Let's show him what he's been missing.

No, he's seen me recently. He knows.

But his wife hasn't
seen me in a while, so...

Well, it's the end of my shift,

and my son has to be
picked up from school.

So I'm just gonna send over
another associate.

She's up on all the trends.

Shawna!

Where are the Waverley Prep books?

They got their own
display table right there.

Wow.

They must be really popular.

Actually, we just got a lot of surplus
stock we're trying to clear out.

They were big a couple years ago,

but the computer says,
"Do not shelve," so...

Hey, are you writing in there?

I'm the author.
I'm just signing it.

You're Jane MacMurray?

No. Jane MacMurray just created
the series. I wrote the book.

Mavis Gary-Crane. See?

Do you know Jane MacMurray?

Yes, I know her really well.

I wrote the book.
- OK.

Do you want a signed copy
for your store?

No, that's fine.

I can sign as many as you want.
It adds value to your stock.

Yeah, but once merchandise is signed,
we can't send it back to the publisher.

Why would you be sending it
back to the publisher?

We're probably not gonna sell them.

The series is done.

Come on, I told you
you can't write in the...

Whatever, book man.

Kendal Strickland never
felt threatened.

If anything, she felt a deep sense
of pity for this rebound girl.

Not in a competitive way.
She wasn't the type to show off.

That said, she couldn't help
her own popularity.

It wasn't her fault that one year
she was nominated homecoming queen...

...of a neighboring high school.

Yes, Kendal Strickland was attractive.
That was obvious.

Other girls were so insecure,

stressing about their faces
and their figures, not Kendal.

Hers was a gracious, effortless
beauty that glowed from within.

However, being that beautiful
could also be intimidating.

Some guys went for girls
who were more ordinary.

How could Kendal make sure her own
perfection wouldn't scare away Ryan...

...the love of her life?

What up?
- Hey.

How are you?

How are you?
- Good, good.

Here's that book for your niece.

Oh, yeah. Thanks for remembering.
I'll send it to her.

There is a character
in that one that's based on you.

What?
- In the book.

I mean, I named him Ashby,
but it's so blatantly you.

When you read it, it'll be obvious.
- Hope he's cool.

We're not even supposed to do that.

We're supposed to stick
to this character bible...

Hey.

Nice to see you again.
- Hey, babe.

You, too.

There it is.

Adorable.

Thank you.

You love it. You love it.

I'm gonna grab a beer.
You want a drink?

Oh, just a water.

Can you get me another summer ale?
- Sure.

It's fine. I'll just pump
and dump after the show.

Don't worry. I'm not trying
to get my kid hammered.

Wow, look at that.

Ah, yes.
The Funquarium. Always chills her out.

Yeah, yeah.

Yes, yes it does.

Oh, starting to get smiles.

Cute.

She's, like, Buddy's clone.

No. I see you in there.

Really?
- A lot of you, in fact.

Thanks.
- Here you go, ladies.

Thank you.
- Here you go.

So how's it going?
I know you're a writer.

I saw a nice article
about you in the Sun.

Yes, I'm an author
of a young adult series.

It's disturbingly popular.

I like your decor.

Is it shabby chic?

Pier One?

A little bit Goodwill.

Buddy and I used to go thrifting
all the time.

Remember that? The '90s?

Oh, my God, Beth. We had this huge
silly T-shirt collection.

It was just, like,
the dumbest thing ever.

The '90s were awesome.
- Yeah.

I used to sleep in his T-shirts
and boxers.

I think I still have a few.

Hey. I still have one of
my ex-boyfriend's T-shirts.

I can't bring myself to get rid of it.
- What?

Which one?
- Like I'd tell you.

What's the chart?

Beth teaches special needs kids.

A lot of my kids
learn emotions cognitively.

It doesn't come naturally to them
the way it does for you and me.

So we need to show them
"this is what happy looks like,"

"this is what anxious looks like,"
and so on.

What about neutral?

I mean, like,
what if you don't feel anything?

That's kind of how they are
a lot of the time.

So, yeah, don't need to teach it.

Oh, my God.

Is that Mavis Gary?
- Yeah.

Can you believe it?
She came here with Beth and Buddy.

Shots.

Psychotic prom queen bitch.

Really?

Come on, tequila time.

Salt.

So... are they any good?

Yeah, they're all right.

I knew it.
They're horrible. I knew it.

Well, they have a lot of fun.

Hey, look. Freehauf's over there.

He's just always lurking, isn't he?
So creepy. Look at his face.

He's so doughy.
He's like a murderer.

Think he owns any clown suits?

Oh, my God. You're terrible.
- Come on.

Dark.
- No.

Hello, Mercury!

I'm Mary Ellen Trantowski.

We are Nipple Confusion.

Yeah.

Please be kind,
as this is only our second show.

And we all have small children at home.

Our first song is a cover.

This one goes out
from our drummer, Beth,

to her sweetheart, Buddy.

She wears denim wherever she goes

Says she's gonna get some records
by the Status Quo

Oh, yeah

Still she won't be forced
against her will

Says she don't do drugs,
but she does the pill

Oh, yeah

I didn't want to hurt you

Oh, yeah

I didn't want to hurt you

Oh, yeah

Says she likes my hair
'cause it's down my back

Says she likes the group
'cause we pull in the slack

Oh, yeah

When she's at the gig
she takes her car...

Remember when we used
to make out to this song?

Yeah.

Yeah, I think this song was playing
the first time I went down on you.

The first time I went...

I screwed up the fill so bad.

Oh, my God.
- I'm sorry, guys.

You did suck a little bit.
- Which one?

That's OK, we still love you.
- Guess.

You guys were namazing.
- Wait. Did you just say "namazing"?

I think someone's had a few too many.
- That's not fair.

Hardly.

It's so interesting to see you
hanging around again, Mavis.

Mary Ellen, you were great tonight.

It's so inspiring to see a single mother
with so much confidence on stage.

Really.

Beth, we gotta get home.

We gotta relieve the babysitter.
- No.

I wanna stay out
just a little while longer.

Yeah, Buddy,
you can't have her back tonight.

Sorry.
- I'll drive him home.

Really?

Buddy, let Mavis drive you home, OK?
I'm gonna stay out and celebrate.

You sure?

Have fun.

Thanks, Mavis.

Easy.

Tolerance has gone down
since you knew me.

What do you mean, since I knew you?

I still know you. Come here.
- Yeah.

Wait.
- What?

Don't you have that babysitter
till 11:00?

Yeah, but we can't go anywhere.

I know, we can't, but...

...time is just so precious.

For real.

It goes so fast.
- I know.

Man, I really love my daughter,
you know?

I know, I know.

I can tell you're a great father.

You're already going above and beyond
in so many ways.

You stepped up to the plate, Buddy.

You do too much, even.

You think so?

Yes.

You're a good, good man, Buddy.

Don't ever shortchange yourself.

I thought I saw lights.

Hi, Daniel. Yep, I'm home.

Where's Beth?

She wanted to stay out
and party all night.

Well, we're all out of breast milk,
and she doesn't want her "nuk" anymore.

I got it.

Good night, Buddy.

Good night.

Thank you. Yeah.

Wow.

Take it easy there, killer.
- I have depression.

OK, well, then, get some exercise.
Take that poor dog of yours on a walk.

Why don't you walk, fat ass?

There's some low-hanging fruit.

You are low-hanging fruit.

Oh, no. No.
- What?

I hate this guy over here.

That's my cousin, Mike.

Mike Moran is your cousin?

Unfortunately.

Oh, here comes the happiest cripple
in Minnesota.

Mavis?
- Mike.

What is up, girly-friend?

Holy shit, coz,
this is such a rad surprise.

Yeah, I'm in town
just for a little real estate thing.

How are you? Yeah.
- I'm great.

Kim and I just had
our six-year anniversary.

Whoa, six years.
What is that, wood? Porcelain?

Strychnine?
- Anyway, the kids are great.

Work is a trip, but I play hard too.

I've been doing a lot of rock climbing.

You mean rock crawling, right?

No, I'm vertical, bro,
believe it or not.

We can do anything a normal can do.

Probably more, because we've had
to reboot for extra positivity.

You know what I'm saying?
You should try it, Matt.

You should try it, Matt.
- No.

I love the way this guy talks.
He's like, "No."

I'm so glad you guys are buds.
I can totally see it.

It's like Will & Grace.

It is.
- No, it isn't.

Look, I'm gonna roll back to my boys,
but we should chat later.

I'll buy you a scotch
or whatever you got there.

Love this place.
Total time capsule, right?

When did he get that chair?
Sophomore year?

Junior. Car wreck.

God, he got so much attention.

Yeah, he was the popular cripple.
Practically ruined high school for me.

Please. That dick ruined my sweet 16,
same weekend.

God, you are a piece of work.

You're a piece of shit.

You know there's stuff all over
the Internet about how you're a cougar.

How I'm a cougar?
I'm not even 30 years old.

You're a cougar.

I am turning 30 this year
and I am freaked out.

It's pretty old.

Kim Kardashian channels
her own inner cougar.

Fuck.

The kiss was electric,
transformative, spiritual, enchanted.

It was like their first kiss
all over again,

except now they knew exactly
what they were doing.

I said, "Listen, Kyle,
you're everything to me.

You're my sun, my moon, my galaxy.
When are you going to get this?"

And he's just not getting it, right?
- Right.

I'm gonna have a...

Hey, you.

Hey, how are you?
- I'm great.

Last night was amazing.

How much longer
are you gonna be in town?

I'm here for you.
How long do you need?

I was just wondering if you're still
in town this weekend,

if you wanna come to the baby's
naming ceremony.

It's this little hippy thing
we're doing out in the yard.

It's not religious or anything...

I would love to come.
- Cool, all right.

Saturday at the house, around 1:00.

Great, I can't wait to see you.
- Great.

Hey, Mom.

Were you even gonna say hello?

It's been so long,
I almost forgot what you look like.

I wasn't avoiding you, Mom. OK?
I was planning on calling.

Why didn't you just come
and stay with us?

Because I needed a quiet place to write.

You have no idea. I have tons
and tons of work to catch up on.

Books still selling well?

It's like I can hardly keep up.

Is that the money you used
to invest in local real estate?

I heard you were here to work on some
kind of real estate transaction.

I was just surprised you didn't
use Aunt Lena as your broker.

She's a little hurt.

Honey?

Look what I found.
- What?

Welcome home.
- Thanks.

Our little real estate tycoon, huh?

Oh, I don't know about that.

Who's this?

This is Dolchie.
- Oh, OK.

Dolce.
- Hello.

I hope you're eating
enough in the city.

You gotta start taking care
of yourself, sweetie.

You know, a Lean Cuisine
is not a meal.

Yeah, I think I might
be an alcoholic.

Very funny.

You're not still pulling it, are you?
- Stop, Dad.

It's just that
your hair is so beautiful.

You know what, Mom? Can you please
take down that photo of me and Allen?

Which picture, sweetie?

The wedding photo. We are divorced.

We just thought it was a nice memory.

Of my failed marriage?

Well, the wedding wasn't a failure.

Remember the tiramisu?
- I liked that Allen.

Dad, he's my ex-husband.
You're supposed to be on my team.

He's a nice guy, that's all.
I didn't know there were teams.

Have you seen any old friends
on this visit?

Actually...

...I've been seeing
quite a bit of Buddy.

Oh, the old beau, huh?

I remember you kids
were so cute in high school.

It's funny how those initial instincts
can be so right, you know?

I mean, you make all these mistakes
along the way,

but the world will make sure you end up
with the person you're meant to be with.

It's good to keep
those people in your life.

The people who really know you best.

And that new baby
of his is just darling.

Have you seen it? Up close?

I suppose.

Is everything OK?

I'm sure it will be fine.
It's probably too soon to tell.

It's just that Buddy used to say that...

...we would make
the cutest little babies, ever.

Hey, did you guys
ever sell my Cabriolet?

Yeah! Sweet ride.

What is that, a drop-top?

I just saw my mother and father.

Oh, heavy. How are they?

Horrible. God, I've been through a lot.

Wanna get hammered?
- Why do you think I'm here?

Come on. Let's hit the woods
in the back of the school.

And grab some of that Star Wars juice.
- That's a limited...

Come on!
- Fine.

Could you walk any slower?

Our school is so ugly.

It looks like a factory.

It actually used to be a rubber
fabrication plant back in the '20s.

You know everything.

These woods were like Hump City
back in the day.

I remember being back here
with a few different guys.

I never knew you were such a slut.

I was normal.

So how are things with old Buddy, huh?

How's the master plan unfolding?

Well, actually, he called me today

and asked me if I wanted to participate
in his baby's naming ceremony.

I don't know.

There's still so much
that's unspoken, but...

...he's involving me
in his child's life.

Buddy is a married man.

By all accounts, happily.

Yeah, happily married men
go to bars alone

with their ex-girlfriends
all the time.

They call them privately, and they
make out with them on porches.

He did not make out with you.
- You weren't there.

We made out.
It was intense and passionate.

He gave me his sweatshirt.

Yes, I noticed.
They probably noticed in space.

And FYI, you look completely
insane wearing it.

Look, I don't know
what Buddy's doing with you,

or what you think he's doing with you,
but you need to move on.

You're one to talk.

All you care about is some scuffle
that happened 20 years ago.

You lean on that crutch,
and you lean on excuses,

and you and I both know
you use this whole thing

as an excuse to do absolutely
nothing with your life.

"Scuffle."

You don't know shit
about what happened to me.

OK? Those jocks you used
to blow during lunch...

...they shattered my legs,

bashed in my brains,

mangled my cock,

so that I have to piss and cum sideways
for the rest of my life.

Then they left me for dead.

You know, things aren't
too great down south.

I can barely get off by myself,
let alone with another person.

You know, what's done is done.

You can't keep dwelling
on the past, Matt.

Are you fucking kidding?

Talk about dwelling in the past.

Here you are back in Mercury,
like a loser,

trying to score
with a happily married man.

Buddy's not happy, OK?
So just stop saying that.

You're hardly the authority
on happiness, Sylvia.

You know what, Matt?

It really is a shame
that you're like this,

because if you had
a good personality,

none of this other stuff
would bother people.

Why don't you use my crutch
again as a metaphor?

That was brilliant. That was masterful.

Or no, save it for your
little teenage stories,

because God knows you don't
know shit about being an adult!

It wasn't the first time
Kendal Strickland was let down.

For all the good they did, beauty and
popularity didn't inspire much loyalty.

Would it be nice to have peers?
Friends she could respect?

Sure, but Kendal knew the lone march
of being special a little too well.

She was used to blazing her own trail.

It was obvious that Ryan
still loved her, crystal clear.

And perhaps that was unfair
to his new girlfriend,

but Kendal Strickland was going
to think about herself for a change.

Who was taking care of Kendal?

And on the subject of fair...

Was it fair that people misjudged
Kendal's intelligence

just because she was so beautiful?

Was it fair everyone thought her life
was so easy, when it was anything but?

No. Life wasn't fair,

and it was up to Kendal to step in
and make things right.

Sometimes in order to heal,
a few people have to get hurt.

Hi, Jan.

Oh, hi.

Wow, really been a long time.

I know. I've been a really busy girl.

Yeah, I've heard that.

Buddy's been very busy, and Bethie.

Finally a grandmother.
- Oh, speak of the devil.

Hi!
- Hey, how are you?

Wow. How are you doing?

I'm good.

Good.
- I brought presents.

Oh, thank you.

Burp cloths.
- Can't have enough pukers.

Oh, hey, Mom?
- Yes?

Can you help Beth
with that endive thing?

Yeah, Grandma to the rescue.
- Can we talk?

Yeah.

Are you having fun? Are you having fun?
Get out of here, Carter-bug.

I think we should talk privately.

Sure, yeah.

Here, follow me.

OK.

OK, so what's going on?

There are so many things
I know we both wanna say.

OK, well, we don't
have to say them all now.

I gotta get Beth's gift ready.
I got her a drum set.

You're so thoughtful,
even during all this.

Well, hey, she pushed it out.

I just want you to know that I'm feeling
everything that you're feeling.

Buddy, these last few days have been
some of the best in my life.

They have?

You don't have to pretend.

I know what's in here...

...and I know what's in here.

Buddy... you're my moon, my stars.

You're my whole galaxy.

Mavis!
What are you doing?

OK.

You don't have to be afraid. It's OK.

You can come to the city with me,
like we always planned.

What the hell are you talking about?

We can work this out. You know we can.
We can handle this like adults.

Mavis, I'm a married man.
- I know. We can beat this together.

You're better than this.

I have to go.

I think you should leave.

Hey, look who's up.

Hey, let me take her.

Let me... Come here.

There you are.

Can you do me a favor?

We need everybody outside.

I wanna get Beth's gift ready.
- Yeah.

Those are delicious.

Hey, listen up, everyone!

I think Buddy has
a little surprise for Beth,

so if you could all just come outside
and gather around the garage.

Come on, let's go.

Mavis?

What?
- Are you OK?

I'll be fine if I can
get a real drink around here.

There's some right here.
Thanks, Uncle Bob.

You know what?

Oh, my God.

I'll get some...
- Fuck you.

Fuck you!

You fucking bitch.

Oh, my God.

You should see your face.

It's a joke.

Are you just gonna stand there
like a big lump?

I love your sweater.

I'll get you a rag.

Go get me a rag, 'cause you got
so many of those lying around here.

Fuckin' burp cloths, whatever.

You know, the funny thing is,

I could have had this party
a long time ago.

This exact same party. Yeah.

Buddy and I were
together for four years,

and we were inseparable. Jan knows.

Right, Jan? Tell them!

You want to clean up?
- No, don't bother.

It is silk. It's fucked.

Mavis, sweetheart.

Mother, I'm trying to tell a story here.

Yeah, Buddy got me pregnant at 20.

And we were gonna keep it!

We were gonna have a little baby,

and a little naming party,

and a Funquarium, and all of that.

And then 12 weeks into it...

Well, I had Buddy's miscarriage.

Which I wouldn't wish for anyone.

Maybe if things were just
a little bit more hospitable

down south in my broken body,

Buddy and I would be here
right now with a teenager,

and probably even more kids,

because we always
found each other. Always!

Right, Jan? Tell them!

What the fuck?

It's a new drum set for Beth.

What's wrong?

Nothing.
- What do you mean, nothing?

My God! What is wrong with you?

Are you like one of those little kids

who need a fucking chart
to learn feelings?

Stand up for yourself!
Why are you covering for me?

That's enough, Mavis. You're drunk.

Oh, I've been drunk
since I've been back, Mom,

and nobody gave two shits until
this one got all bent out of shape.

Mavis, what the hell is going on?
- Why did you invite me?

I didn't invite you.
My wife did.

Beth practically forced me to call you.
She feels sorry for you.

We all do, Mavis.

It's obvious you're having
some mental sickness,

some depression.

You're very lonely and confused.

So Beth made me invite you here,
even though I knew it was a mistake.

I knew it.

You're lying.

He's not.

Well. What about now?

You hate me now?

'Cause it should be easy,
'cause I fucking hate you.

Look at you.
What is wrong with you people?

Mavis, honey.

You know, I came back for you.
For you!

And I hate this town!

It's a hick, lake town
that smells of fish shit!

But I came back.

I just wanted you to know that.

I screwed up.

I screwed up so bad.
- Where have you been?

You're scaring me.

I'm crazy.

And no one loves me.

You don't love me.

Guys like me...

...are born loving women like you.

I went to Buddy's house.

What happened?

I ruined my dress.

I'll get you...

I'll get you a shirt.

No, I want yours.

You want the shirt I'm wearing?

Hide me.

It's OK.

Why Buddy?

He's a good man. He's kind.

Are other men unkind?

He knew me when I was at my best.

You weren't at your best then, Mavis.

Not then.

You know, I saw you every day.

You had this little mirror
in your locker,

shaped like a heart...

...and you looked in that mirror
more than you ever looked at me,

and I was at my best.

Good morning.

Hi.

Coffee?

Sure.

Do you still write those books?

No.

The series is over. It got cancelled.

I'm actually writing
the last one right now.

What happens?

I don't know.

Hey, do you know this girl named Beth?

She married Buddy Slade from school.

Yeah. I know that Beth.

What do you think of her?

I... I...

I don't really like her.

I mean, I think that
you're way prettier than she is.

What happened to your dress?

I'm sorry. Did I say something wrong?

Shit.

What's wrong? What did I say?

I have a lot of problems.

Can't you get a new dress?

It's really difficult
for me to be happy...

...and then for other people,

it just seems so simple.

I know.

They just grow up,
and they're so... fulfilled.

I don't feel fulfilled.

Well...
- And frankly,

if you don't feel fulfilled
with all the stuff that you have...

I need to change, Sandra.

No, you don't.
- What?

You're the only person
in Mercury who could write a book,

or wear a dress like that.

I'm sure there's plenty
of other people who could...

Everyone here is fat and dumb.

Don't say that.

I mean, you think so?

Everyone wishes that
they could be like you.

You know, living in the big city,

all famous and beautiful
and all that.

I'm not really famous.

Well, you know, special or whatever.

I mean, some days, when I have
a slow shift at work,

I'll sit and think about you,

living in your cool apartment,
going out and stuff.

It seems really nice.

Yeah. But...

Most people here seem
so happy with so little.

It's like they don't even seem to care
what happens to them.

That's because it doesn't
matter what happens to them.

They're nothing.

Might as well die.

Fuck Mercury.

Thank you.

I needed that.

You're right.

This place blows.

I need to get back to Minneapolis.

Take me with you.

Excuse me?

Take me with you.

You know, to the Mini Apple.

You're good here, Sandra.

Oh.

Dolce.

I'm so sorry.

My baby. Come here.

Graduation turned out to be
a bittersweet ceremony for Kendal.

While honored to be
the valedictorian of her class,

there was an unmistakable
air of sadness

over the sudden death of Ryan Ashby.

Who could have imagined when Ryan
and his girlfriend set sail that day,

it would be the last time
anyone ever saw them?

Good boy.

Poor Ryan...

Lost at sea.

They don't need those back.

You can put them in a scrapbook,
or whatever.

Just so you know, those doughnuts
are for Honors Members only.

Kendal felt the weight of her high
school years lifting off of her

as she emptied out her locker.

Sure, she'd think about Waverley
from time to time.

Cheer squad, the debate team,

sneaking into the woods
for a drink after class.

But her best years
were still ahead of her.

Kendal Strickland was
ready for the world.

It was time to look to the future.

A new chapter.

As she boarded the train for Cambridge,

she took one last look
at her small town and blew it a kiss...

...thinking, "Life, here I come."