All language subtitles for Spinal.Tap.II.The.End.Continues.1080p.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.x264-SyncUP.eng

Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!
Tap! Tap!

Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!

Man, I put them up there
with AC/DC, Motorheads.

Spinal Tap is, you know,
in the vortex.

I listen to Tap, like,
every night before I go to bed.

Really?
You think that's calming?

It's very calming.

Tap! Tap! Tap!

Tap! Tap! Tap!

Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!

Tap! Tap! Tap!

Tap! Tap! Tap!

This is where it all happened,

the site of Spinal Tap's
reunion concert.

Hi, I'm Marty DiBergi.

Forty years ago, I was honored
to direct a film called

This is Spinal Tap.

It chronicled what was to be
Tap's final tour.

But after the release
of the film,

Tap continued on
and played such storied venues

as Wembley Stadium.

♪ Where the demons dwell ♪

♪ Where the banshees live ♪

Glastonbury.

And the Royal Albert Hall.

♪ Tonight, I'm gonna rock you ♪

Then, 15 years ago,

lead guitarist Nigel Tufnel

and David St. Hubbins,

friends since childhood,

mysteriously stopped
talking to each other.

And to the heartbreak of their
loyal but shrinking fan base,

Tap stopped performing.

But I discovered
that Hope Faith,

the daughter of Tap's now
deceased manager, Ian Faith,

had inherited Tap's contract,

which called
for one more performance.

When he passed away,
were you surprised that he--

-Died?
-Yeah, were you surprised?

No. It's a miracle he lived
as long as he did, to be honest.

-Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-Yeah. He was an angry man.

In the topsy-turvy
world of heavy rock,

having a good solid
piece of wood in your hand
is quite often useful.

I mean, he didn't have much
to leave me

because when he died,
there wasn't much of anything.

But because I was next of kin,
I got the contract,

which I thought was
pretty worthless, to be honest,
no disrespect.

The band hadn't
played together for some time,

so I just thought
it was dead in the water.

And then after the Garth Brooks
song went viral...

♪ My baby fits me
Like a flesh tuxedo ♪

♪ He loves to sink me
With his pink torpedo ♪

♪ Big bottom, big bottom ♪

♪ Talking about bum cakes ♪

♪ Yeah, I got 'em ♪

So, I was like, "Oh, hang on,
this isn't maybe worthless."

Hope was no fool.

She knew a thing or two
about hot irons

and when to strike them.

But hey,
enough of my exposition.

It's time to make some noise.

♪ Well, I'm sittin' here
Besides the railroad track ♪

♪ And I'm waiting
For the train... ♪

The first order of business,

track down Nigel,
David, and Derek.

I found lead guitarist
Nigel Tufnel

living in the quaint village
of Berwick-Upon-Tweed.

He and his lady friend,
Moira Babbage,

were proprietors
of a cheese and guitar shop.

I'm just wondering why you chose
this after the band broke up.

Yeah, well, I thought,

how do you make your life

after rock and roll? Cheese.

That's odd because
you normally wouldn't think

the rock and roll, now cheese.

-Yeah.
-You wouldn't think those--

Maybe not, but for me, it was.

And I see over there
you have a number of guitars.

-And you sell both?
-Yes and no.

Sometimes people come in
with a guitar, you see?

And they trade for cheese.

-Really?
-Yeah.

-So, let's say--
-Sometimes it's the opposite.

Sometimes people come in
with cheese.

-Yeah.
-It goes both ways.

What I do is I go like this

because I trust my hands
more than a scale.

-I go like this.
-Yeah.

Then I go like this.
Let's say...

Yeah.

-Close. Very close.
-Yeah.

So, a half a wheel
of that cheese

-would buy you that bass.
-Trade it. Everyone's happy.

Do you miss playing music?

-I play music.
-Where?

At a pub.

Do you miss
playing with Spinal Tap?

I don't miss the friction.

You know,
we had, um... friction.

Yeah. Have you talked to David
in the last 15 years?

-I have not. No.
-No?

Or Derek. No, I haven't.

-Really?
-I haven't spoken
to them at all.

So, how do you feel
after 15 years?

I feel, um...

nervous.

Not about the playing bit.

About the people part of it.

-Yeah.
-So.

-Hello, love. Hello.
-Hello.

-And now, who's this?
-This is Moira.

-Oh, hi.
-Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you.

-And you work here with...
-I do.

You're standing where I was
when I met him.

Oh, you were a customer.

She walked in, I saw her,

and I thought, "Oh, my God."

He gave me a piece of Wigmore,
and it melted my heart.

Oh, wow.

It was so delicious.

And I just got that feeling,

you know, I want to...

I want to, like,

take off my clothes
and stay forever.

-Really?
-And she did.

So, that little
piece of cheese...

The Wigmore does it.

Lead guitarist
David St. Hubbins

was living in Morro Bay,
California,

and was still making music.

Would you like to see
where the magic happens?

Yeah.

-Wow. Wow.
-Yeah.

-Look at this.
-This is incredible.

This is where you do
all your recording?

-You do everything here?
-Actually, I do it all there.

-Oh, there.
-Yeah.

Everything in this studio

would fit in this one's
left hind leg.

This is something
I've been working on.

This is for a podcast.

It's one of those
murder podcasts.

-Oh, yeah. People love murder.
-Yeah. They do.

They call it murder porn.

It was a day like any other.

The sun was peeking
through the Aspens

in the quiet town
of Silverton, Colorado.

Joanne Miller was expected
at the Skyview Diner

to greet the breakfast crowd.

However, on this brisk
fall morning,

Joanne Miller
would never arrive

to serve her hungry guests.

But that's...

the trouble with murder.

So, you wrote the music...

-Yeah. Yeah.
-...for that podcast?

Yeah.

So, you've been spending
most of your time

writing these scores,
essentially, to the podcast?

I'm just working
on a score now for a film.

-Oh, really?
-Yeah.

It's a horror film
that takes place

in a retirement community.

It's called The Night of
the Assisted Living Dead.

-Yeah.
-Yeah.

I'll tell you
what my biggest hit was.

This is a little something.

You're going to recognize it
right away.

Your call is important to us,

so please stay on the line.

The first available operator

will be happy to assist you.

Your call is important to us,
so please stay on the line.

-That bit there.
-Yeah.

Favorite bit.

Oh, wow.

It won a Holdy.

-A Holdy? That's--
-Yeah.

That's an award
for hold on, you know...

-Music for putting you on hold.
-Putting you on hold music.

Wow, that's interesting.
You know, you haven't
played together in 15 years.

-Yeah.
-And how do you feel about that?

There was a stick in the spokes.
Let's put it that way.

There was a moment
that I couldn't get over.

And when Jeanine left, it all--

That all kind of came
into focus.

-Have you spoken to her since?
-No. No.

-Do you know where she is?
-No.

You know, I don't want
to speak out of school,

but I think you'd be surprised
to find what happened to her.

I'd just like to say that I hope
she's found the right man.

I didn't tell him about Jesus.

I mean, I didn't want him
to be jealous or anything.

- Yeah.
- Because he might be.

A lot has happened
since the last time I saw you.

Can you tell me anything?

What happened?

We broke up,

and I didn't know what to do.

I had a nice cup of tea.

-Right.
-And as I'm having a cup of tea,

I noticed this glow

comes into the room,

grows,

almost like it grows inside me.

And then... I hear this voice.

This voice says to me,

"Every breath you take,

every move you make,

I'll be watching you."

That sounds like a-a-a song.

Uh, The Police.

That's a song that, uh...

-Sting sings that in The Police.
-Oh.

Yeah.

Bass player Derek Smalls

was living in London
and became the curator

and sole owner
of a museum that featured glue

from virtually
every country in the world.

Have you been playing music
at all in the last--

Yes, I-I-I tried
to organize a tour,

and, uh, we had two
symphony orchestras.

♪ Hell toupee ♪

♪ Hell toupee ♪

♪ When it goes
Old Satan knows ♪

♪ There's hell toupee ♪

How long have you been
running this glue museum?

Glue had always been
something that fascinated me.

What keeps things together?

- Glue.
- -What keeps people together?

- Glue.
- -It's the adhesives of human behavior.

I'm in a band that constantly
is breaking apart

and coming back together.

-And you see yourself as...
-Glue.

-I want to show you something.
-Okay.

Come with me.

Glue's made
of all sorts of things.

-Yeah.
-Mainly animals

in the first thousands of years,
you know?

This is from a tortoise
in the Galapagos.

You cannot get glue
from a tortoise anymore.

Oh, what is it,
like outlawed or something?

I think it's a union thing.

This is the most valuable glue
on this continent.

Smell this.

-Can you smell that?
-Wow, that's very powerful.

Yeah, you cannot get this.
You cannot make this anymore.

Oh!

Is it...

Can you...? You can't get...
Can you try...?

You can't get that out?

-No.
-Uh-oh.

Vivian!

Can you bring
some solvent, please?

-Can we keep talking?
-Yeah, okay.

The band hasn't played together
in 15 years.

Do you have any idea
what caused the rift?

I was a representative
of a cryptocurrency.

Hi, Derek Smalls here.

Like everyone else in rock,

I know a little bit about money,

especially the newest
kind of money, crypto.

Everyone knows Peter Bruegel is
a painter of great masterpieces.

Now you can have
the artist at BruegelCoin

paint a masterpiece
for your portfolio.

I mean, I feel
a little guilty about this.

-I got David and Nigel
to invest in it.
-Oh.

And maybe there's some
bad feeling about that

because it went--
It's worth zero.

So, for the first time
in 15 years,

David, Nigel, and Derek
would meet again

in the home of jazz,
blues, and gumbo,

the Big Easy, New Orleans.

We're in the French Quarter now.

We could do the ghost tour.

The ghost tour.
That might be fun.

-But at night.
-No, you don't do it in the day.

-It'd scare me in the daytime.
-In the daytime,
ghosts are just rumors.

- Who's that?
- Who do you think it is?

- Oh.
- Have you seen him?

I got a postcard
from him one Christmas.

Really? It's more than I got.

Hello.

- Hello.
- All good?

Yeah. Long flight.

Yeah?

Shut the door.

There you are.

Yeah. We're here.

Hey, mate.

This is quite a thing, isn't it?

Excuse me.

Hello, love. How are you doing?

Hello. How are you?

Oh, it's weird.

-I'm off.
-Yeah.

I'll see you in a bit.

It's very strange being
without you and so far away.

You know, it's...

Have you met the others yet?

Um...

Just... Excuse me.

Yeah.
David's just coming through.

Don't know if this was
a good idea or not.

I just don't know.

Give it time.

Do we have any towels?

Do we have any towels?

You know, it's so strange.

I knew him
when I was five years old.

How was it last time you'd met?
Was it fine the last time?

No, it was--
It got a little tense, you know,

when we did the last few gigs.

I would say, "What's going on?"

And he'd say,
"As if you don't know," he said.

Mm-hmm.

Dora died, finally.

No.

So, we'll be selling
a lot less Stilton.

Oh, no.

For years, the band had...

Bobbi Flekman was their
publicist, their PR person.

-She was, yeah.
-And, uh, you know,

I'm just curious
why you didn't reach out to her.

I did reach out to her.

-Oh, yeah?
-A lot.

She's busy.

Listen to me. I still have PTSD

from that Smell the Glove tour.

-Oh.
-It was so painful for me.

-Right.
-I can't even tell--

I became Buddhist.

Hey, hey, hey. Here they are.

- Hello. How are you?
- Hello!

-Hi.
-Good to see you, sweetie.

I understand Hope hired you

to help promote the concert.

How is that going?

I would say I'm working

as smoothly with Hope as with
anyone I've ever worked with.

-Really?
-Yes.

She's sort of... She's...

Bless her, she's, you know,

tremendously out of her depth.

Um, and that's lovely,
because, you know,

it gives her the opportunity
to grow as a person,

and it gives me the opportunity
to take advantage.

Tomorrow,
we're auditioning drummers.

- Oh, yeah.
- -We've lined up some more auditions.

- That's a sore subject, innit?
- Yeah.

For obvious reasons,
there is some reluctance

amongst the drumming
community...

- We understand.
- ...to engage.

-Yes.
-We have actually started

to put out advertisements

that don't name the band at all

in the hope that, you know,

we can slowly walk people
towards the position of being--

It's like a sneak gig.
I like the way he thinks.

The other guy was Artie Fufkin,
who was their A&R guy.

I mean, he was the guy who
promoted their albums and all.

He was great. And, again,
he didn't want to know.

Yeah, well,
I was able to find him.

-No way.
-Yes.

I was able to track him down.

And he's gone in a completely
different direction.

The whole industry
had collapsed.

-Yeah. Yeah.
-You know, with the streaming

and the thing, and the whatever,
YouTube.

How did you wind up with this?

I woke up in the middle
of the night, and I said...

Two words were on my brain.

"Dancing inflatables."

If this is the final gig
that Spinal Tap do,

then what we need to do
is secure your legacy.

Now, the simplest,
most effective way

that we could do that
is that if during the gig,

at least one, but ideally
no more than two of you,

were to die.

Uh, that's what I call
the Elvis effect.

It really allows for a sort
of late flowering of...

Do you mean pretend die?

I think that would
complicate matters.

It's easier if you just...

- If we just expire?
- If the exertion-- Expire.

-Do you mean actually die?
-Yes.

-Yeah, but I don't want to.
-That's a bit hard to arrange.

No, no, no, I appreciate that,

but I think in terms
of your legacy going forward,

how you'll be remembered,
how you'll be talked about,

what effect that will have
on record sales.

I'm thinking documentaries,
a huge memorial concert.

You can do that without actually
killing one of us, though.

It's difficult to do a memorial
concert when the person's alive.

That's a sort of rule of thumb.

Would you settle for a coma?

- Oh, now that's interesting.
- You know...

Oh, now, David,
that's interesting.

That's a great bit
of thinking outside, well,

the literal box,
I suppose, actually.

So, we have
a few drummers lined up.

Some on Zoom, some in the room.

Before we shut down
your drummer,

what happened to him?

-Oh, Skippy. Sad.
-Skippy.

Yeah, really sad.
Yeah, Skippy Skuffleton.

He sneezed himself
into oblivion.

-What?
-He had a terrible
sneezing thing.

-And he couldn't stop sneezing.
-A sneezing fit.

-Yeah.
-Fit.

-And it wouldn't stop.
-No.

-And he died.
-Yeah.

Is that medically possible?

Well, we think that it was
because he was allergic

to the seeds inside the maracas.

-He'd never played maracas.
-Yeah.

We wanted him
to put maracas on a track.

-But no one really knows.
-Well, that's my theory anyway.

Because it's all of a sudden...

The important thing is
he's dead.

Here we are, yeah.

So, how'd you find this place?

Wow, look at that.

Well, there's only one
in New Orleans.

-Really? It's very homey.
-This is the best one.

If it's the only one,
it'd better be the best one.

- Of course.
Logically, it is.
- Very nice. Indeed.

-Here we go.
This is your new room.
-This is nice. Isn't this nice?

- This is all for us then?
- -All for you.

- This is great.
- Amazing. It's crazy.

- This is very homey. I like it.
- Yeah.

The acoustics seem all right.

- Good.
- We're in business.

I think we've got what we need,
it looks like.

- Hello, hello, hello!
- Sounds like a studio.

- Give me an A. A.
- Huh?

♪ A ♪

♪ When I first laid eyes
On County Dunne ♪

♪ I was green
As the hill so high ♪

♪ But in later years
The streets ran red ♪

♪ With blood
'Neath the violet sky ♪

♪ I loved me a lass
Whose hair was long ♪

♪ And brown
As the finest stew ♪

♪ And she swore by the stars
In the jet-black night ♪

♪ She'd be true ♪

♪ As the sky so blue ♪

Nice.

Yeah, okay.

You're not gonna do that
on stage, though.

Cards on the table,

the music industry
have always hated me.

They've always hated me,
and a lot of that is jealousy.

Um, but what they perceive
as my "weakness,"

you know, is my superpower

in that I don't give a shit
about music.

The reason for that is I suffer
from a medical condition,

um, called St. Cecilia's Curse,

which means
that I can't process music.

So, I can't hear it,
and I can't replicate it.

So, ask me to sing any song.
Name a song.

Uh, "Happy Birthday to You."

I can't sing it.
Name another one.

"The Best Things in Life
Are Free."

I can't sing it.
You see, it's a curse.

We're gonna
run the track by you.

Yeah, have fun.

We've stripped
the actual drummer out.

He's dead anyway.

So, just thought you might

- just give it a fly, you know.
- All right.

-Wow, um...
-Uh, that was...

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

I'm gonna try and sort
some cleaning stuff out.

- Is he coming this way?
- Yeah.

-We need someone who can--
-Hey, guys.

We have Questlove on the line
in the other room.

-This might solve our problems.
-Okay.

Oh, here they are.
Here they are.

This is Spinal Tap.

He's come back to us
about the audition.

Very nice. Yeah, very nice.

- Oh, yeah.
- Look who it is.
Look who you are.

-It's a pleasure to meet you.
-How are you, guys?

Good. Thank you for coming.
Thank you for considering us.

It's my pleasure.
You guys are legends.

Thank you.
Well, so are you as well.

So, you think
you might fill the bill?

You know, guys,

uh...

I have a colonoscopy to do,

- so I don't know if I can do it.
- -Ouch.

What if we got an extra
comfy stool for you?

Guys, look,
yes, you're legendary, but...

I-I don't wanna die.

-Not legendary enough.
-Okay. All right.

Okay, well,
we've got to respect that.

I-I would love to.

I'm still doing
the Chili Peppers.

Yes, you are. We know, yeah.

But it's a dangerous,
dangerous,

you know, gig for a drummer.

We've only lost 11 or 12...

-Eleven.
-Eleven drummers.

You know what?
I got the guy for you.

- Who's that?
- Lars.

Lars from Metallica.

-Lars Ulrich?
-Yes.

-He's good.
-He's a great drummer.

How are you, Lars?
Good to see you.

Hope Faith. Do you remember...
Do you remember Ian Faith,

our manager from years back?
That's his daughter.

- I'm Ian's daughter.
- That's right.

How's your dad holding up?

-My dad is dead.
-Yeah.

-He's not holding up at all.
-So, he's holding down.

Yeah, so anyway,
we've got this one gig.

We're still short a drummer
because things happen.

That's very kind of you,
though. Uh, this...

So, this Metallica thing...

We're a couple--
Four decades into it.

You don't need
to leave Metallica.

-You can stay in Metallica.
-It's just one gig, yeah.

If they can find
someone else for a night.

-It's just one night.
-It's one night.

I have, however, heard,

uh, that Chad Smith,
the Red Hot Chili Peppers,

I don't know
if you've heard of Chad.

I believe he may
be looking for a gig.

My question to you, really, is,
having seen everybody...

- Yeah.
- ...do you need a drummer?

It's a rock band. No rock
band doesn't have a drummer.

- Yeah.
- -I've put together 19 bands,

three of whom
have had number one hits.

Not one of those people
played an instrument.

Thank you so much for having me.

We got one more.
We got one more.

- Hi!
- Good to know. Hello.

-Hi, everyone.
-Hi. We spoke on the phone.

-Hi. Didi, yeah?
-How are you? Yeah, that's me.

-I'm Simon. Nice to meet you.
-Hi, Simon. Such a pleasure.

- What's your name?
- Didi.

-Didi. Hello.
-Hi, such a pleasure.

- Hello, Didi.
- And Derek.

Hi, Derek.
Wow, I can't believe...

-Nigel. Yeah.
-Hi.

We're gonna run a track down

-and see what you're like.
-Okay.

I think we're done after this,
don't you?

♪ Little girl
You're just four feet ♪

♪ And you still got
Your baby teeth ♪

♪ You're too young
And I'm too well-hung ♪

♪ But tonight
I'm gonna rock you ♪

♪ Tonight, I'm gonna rock you ♪

Oh!

Go! Oh, yes!

How does it feel to be

the latest drummer
for Spinal Tap?

There's been a string,
you know, of many drummers.

Some of them met with some,
you know, strange endings.

How do you feel
being the newest member?

I mean, rock and roll
is about living for today

and leaving dying
for another day.

Very good point.
I noticed they're setting up
your drum kit over there.

It's green.

You chose that color.
Is there any reason for that?

Yeah, Stumpy Pepys
is one of my personal heroes.

I decided to pay him a tribute
for how he passed away

in a bizarre gardening accident,

-so hence the green...
-Oh.

...and the pink underheads.

And we're setting up
some roses there.

-Ah, I see.
-And that's for my fallen hero.

Next in line is Stumpy Joe,

who unfortunately choked
on someone else's vomit.

Yes.

I have, uh, a kit that looks...

-Like vomit?
-Yeah.

What makes it look like vomit?
Are there little pieces of corn?

- Because I always notice
when people throw up,

there's always corn in there,
even if they didn't eat corn.

There is yellow
mixed up with green and red.

And I notice, this your snack?
You're eating very healthy.

I just have learned from
all the rock and roll tragedies.

-And so wanna try
and up my chances of...
-Right.

-...maybe dodging this "curse."
-I see what you're saying.

- I'm offering.
- All right.

-I'll take an almond.
-Cheers.

All right, yeah, cheers.

-Dink. Right.
-Dink.

♪ Lord, it's hard ♪

♪ When you break up ♪

♪ Lord, I'm crying ♪

I'm curious as to why
you chose New Orleans.

There was a cancelation,
a date opened up at the arena,

and that was really
why we came here.

Oh, really? There was, like,
all of a sudden...

-Who was supposed to be there?
-An evening with Stormy Daniels.

-That was canceled.
-Oh, canceled, so--

-And so, that made way for us.
-And you slid in.

-Slid right in. Yeah.
-Yeah.

Thank God we found someone.

-She's great.
-She's unbelievable.

- She's bloody great.
- She's great.

How do you suppose a girl
grows up becoming a drummer?

Because it's not natural.
It doesn't--

Eating, exercise, you know.

That's how one continues living.

These days, you know,
they can be anything.

- Oh, what's this?
- Move your plate.

- Where's that gonna go?
- Oh, wait a minute.

I have prepared
a traditional
Cajun dinner for three.

Take your forks, your knives,
and just go right at that.

-All right, we'll try it.
-Thank you so much.

-It looks lovely, yeah.
-You're welcome.

Okay, for me, and I'm not
trying to be unadventurous,

but I think the corn is...

-Probably your safest bet. Yeah.
-...the only thing I can eat.

- I might try the bangers.
- -Don't try to scare the ghost.

Don't try to talk to them
or yell "boo," don't do that.

And get those monitors up
really, really high, all right?

-Excuse me.
-Hello.

- Hello.
- Oh.

- We're having dinner.
- Oh, well,

this is Sinister Sighting.

It's a tour group,
haunted tours.

I bring them through every day.
So, don't mind us.

Hi. You guys go right ahead
and have your dinner.

Oh, now see, this is great.

- These your instruments?
- Yes.

Oh, well, you know, musically,
you know who lives here?

- No.
- Oh, my goodness.

Fats Domino, Louis Armstrong.

-They're dead.
-They don't live anywhere.

Well, their spirits
live here, yeah.

Put those up high now.

This was not mentioned.

Will this keep?

It was a one-nighter I was
supposed to play with them.

-Oh, really? Just one night?
-One-nighter.

-And that turned into 33 years.
-I didn't know what gig it was.

They gave me an address
in Beverly Hills,

and it was a bris.

♪ Listen to what
The flower people say ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah ♪

You care to join us?

- What's that?
- Care to join--

I think we all do the "ah's,"
or you do the "ah's,"

and I come in underneath.

-♪ Listen ♪
-♪ Shh ♪

♪ To what
The flower people say ♪

♪ Ah, la, la, la, la, la ♪

But were you doing "la, la's"
at the end instead of "ah's"?

♪ La, la, la ♪

Was I hearing "la, la's"?

♪ La, la, la ♪

- Do it again.
- -No, I don't want to hear it.

Here we go.

♪ Ah, la, la ♪

No, I don't want the "la's."

Where did the "la's" come from?

- They should be "ah's."
- It's "ah's."

Well, I've been doing "la's."

You've never done
that in your life.

I think I have.

Let's hear all about it
another time.

- Hello.
- Hi.

-Ah.
-Couldn't sleep.

Do you know what?
Jim died today.

Jim died?

Wha-- But he wasn't that old.

And do you know what?

My worst fear is that cheese

is upping
everyone's cholesterol.

No, it's-- I don't think, no.

People eat cheese
and don't die, don't they?

Got it. Got it.

"Don't go spending
all your money."

- Yeah. Okay. Yeah.
- "Save your pennies for--"

David, give me a sec.

-Oh, sorry.
-Just...

- Hello.
- Yeah.

-Are things better with David?
-No.

I don't understand
this coldness.

Even though I've known him
since we were children,

I just can't say,
"What is going on?"

I can say it to you.

Could you sing it out,
like in a song?

Like just sing it out?

Oh, yeah. I could do that.

I could write a song,

and that would be my way

of communicating with him.

♪ David ♪

♪ What's going on with you? ♪

♪ Are you feeling blue? ♪

♪ Is it me or you? ♪

See, it would be
something like that.

He might start
to harmonize like...

♪ Nothing much ♪

Yeah.

I wonder if I'd have
the publishing of that.

Do the F.

What, what, what, what, what?

No, just give it a chance.

-I know what you're gonna say.
-We're doing it.

And it's like a car
going into a wall.

There's a beautiful figure there
you're not hearing.

I hear it. You've changed
the time signature.

You can't hear it over the sound
of your mind slapping shut.

-Look.
-You've changed
this time signature just--

-It goes to six-eight
for two bars.
-Well, I know.

-This is not Stockhausen.
-But it just jumps at you,

-like a cat jumping.
-That's a good thing.

- Okay, go. Go.
- One, two, three, and...

Yeah!

You can keep that energy going

even if you don't care
for the chords.

F.

G.

And...

I don't know why this
is so hard for you to grasp.

-I'm grasping it.
That's the problem.
-It's really simple.

That is the problem.
I'm actually grasping it.

-Once you've grasped it--
-And my fingers
are saying, "Don't."

- Care to weigh in?
- -You're not saying a word.

I'm not saying a word.

No, I know. You don't
have to say you're not.

-He's about to say a word.
-Pointing out
I was not saying a word.

- Now I'm gonna say a word.
- Okay, what's the word?

Is it like this all the time?

Uh, sometimes.

F.

This B flat, which becomes
a B in the E chord

and brings us
right back to the top.

No, you can explain it
all you want.

Do you think they'd mind
if I interrupted?

Is that what's
happening in that bit?

No, what's happening is
that you're pushing back

against anything
you don't care for,

or anything you don't
understand, which is a lot.

Hey, guys.

-Can you hear me?
-Yeah.

Paul here.

Is that... Is that the Paul?

It's one of them.

It's the one, actually.

Well, I was listening,
and I got a suggestion for you.

- I don't wanna interrupt, but...
- Yeah.

Yeah, you can come in. Come in.

- Do we stand?
- Do we salute?

I think we should stand, yeah.

- Hello.
- How are you guys?

- Wow, that's amazing.
- I was just rehearsing

and I was passing,
so I thought I'd just drop in,

-say hello. Yeah.
-Hello.

I don't think of you
as a heavy metal guy.

-I thought these guys are great.
-Really?

And you know, the lyrics,
it's almost educational.

Yeah, anyone
who can write about...

-a flesh tuxedo...
-Yes.

...and a pink torpedo.

-That's literature, really.
-Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Listen, you have a note for us?

Yeah, you know, I was listening
to what you're doing,

and it's going along great.

-Yeah, it's a nice tempo, yeah.
-And then,

it seemed to fall apart.

- So, it's just E...
- Yeah.

♪ Ba-ba ♪

♪ G, C, A, F ♪

-Yeah.
-The G is good, right?

Then it goes to the six-eight,
major seven.

That's the bit.

It kind of went somewhere else.

It didn't seem
to fit with the...

...you know, this rocky feel.

There is a case to be made

for a kind of a standalone bit
of four bars.

Yeah, if it stands alone
in another room.

It sounds like we're playing,
then it's like,

"Let's go on holiday somewhere."

I think it works.
I think it bloody works, but...

Well, it's not for me
to say, but...

It sort of is, actually, yeah.

Well, just lose that bit
and go back to where you were.

We'll take it under advisement.

What does that mean?

He's gonna call his lawyer.

Listen, it's all creative.

Well, it is
until you get to that bit.

Yeah. Then it's not creative.
Then it's like a wrecking ball.

Why don't we do something else?

-"Cups and Cakes"?
-Oh, my God.

See, that's not got
a funny bit in the middle.

No, exactly. That makes sense.

- Unlike...
- Okay, yeah, yeah.

You don't have to belabor it.

Let's try it, yeah.

E.

A minor.

G.

♪ Cups and cakes
Cups and cakes ♪

♪ Oh, what good things
His mother makes ♪

♪ You've got to take tea
Won't you take it with me? ♪

♪ What a gay time it will be ♪

♪ Cups and cakes
Cups and cakes ♪

♪ Please make sure
That nothing breaks ♪

♪ The china's so dear
And the treacle so clear ♪

♪ And I'm glad
That you are here ♪

♪ Milk and sugar
Bread and jam ♪

♪ Yes, please, sir
And thank you, ma'am ♪

♪ Here I am ♪

B again.
♪ Ba, ba, ba ♪

-Instrumental.
-♪ Cups and cakes ♪

Yeah. Toy drummer, yeah.

♪ Oh, cups and cakes ♪

♪ Cups and cakes ♪

♪ I'm so full, my tummy aches ♪

♪ How sad it must end
But I'm glad I'd a friend ♪

♪ Sharing cups and cakes
With me ♪

-♪ Cups and cakes with me ♪
-♪ With me ♪

-A, B.
-♪ Cups and cakes ♪

-♪ Cups and cakes ♪
-♪ Ah ♪

Yeah! Huh? Yeah.

I have to know, how does it feel

to be playing
with Paul McCartney?

-I was a bit put off.
-Why?

Well, because, I mean,
you know, he came in,

he immediately started
throwing his weight around.

I would think that they
would respect your opinion.

I mean,
it's not like you don't have...

-Seemed like that.
-...experience doing that.

I'm not sure David respected me.

You know, he's got this
sort of, like, toxic personality

he spreads everywhere.

I'm not gonna let that worry me.

No, I think that's wise
on your part.

Yeah. It's all right.
He doesn't want it?

-Yeah.
-Screw him.

But as a kid growing
up in Squatney,

did you ever think
you'd be playing with a Beatle?

No. It was a thrill
that I wish I could enjoy more,

but it's only due
to the flaws in my character,

which I'm rather proud of.

Obviously, there'll be
the regular merch.

-Uh, T-shirts...
-T-shirts and stuff.

- And hats.
- And caps.

If you think about
the age of your audience,

we should actually be
trying to partner with, say,

companies that do stairlifts
and walk-in showers.

You know, those hammocks
that lower you into a bath.

That kind of thing
would sell with your demographic
tremendously well.

I don't know how you're gonna
sell that at a concert.

You brought Simon in.

So, you feel like it was
a smart move on your part.

I think it's about
knowing who you are

-and what your skill set is.
-Right.

And I just think
there are things

that I know that I can't do,

the skills that Simon has.

But I know that I've got, like,
soft skills, you know,

and I've got a connection
with the band,

and obviously, I know them
because of my dad and all that.

So, I bring that,
and then he brings

that kind of slightly cold...

Um, trying to find the right
word without seeming mean,

but just that sort of
shitty vibe.

If I said, "What are people
drinking a lot of,"
what would you say?

- Beer.
- -Well, yes, certainly beer.

- Tea.
- True, tea.

-Coffee.
-But what are people drinking

a lot of?

- Water.
- Yes.

And Hope
has had a rather brilliant idea.

- Look at that.
- Tap water.

Tap water.

-Look at that.
-Look at the shape.

It's almost too perfect.

But what's inside
is some kind of special water.

-No.
-It says "artisan" there.

It's just tap water.

It's tap water, yeah.

Now, the piece of resistance...

-Yes.
-...is...

- Here we go.
- Whatever it is.

I think it's great.
I think it's fantastic.

This isn't it.
It's got a sheet over it.

We can agree it was an outrage

that you were not inducted into

the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame,
that you were refused entry.

I think it was the letter
that upset me,

which just said, "Fuck off."

-Yes.
-You could say, "No, not yet."

It said,
"Fuck off. Sincerely yours."

Yeah, well, that's true.

- Brace yourself.
- We present...

the International House of Rock.

- I'll be.
- This is like

the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame?

Like the Rock & Roll Hall
of Fame, only better

- because it will have you in it.
- Yeah.

We're going to build precisely
this structure

and in it,
we're going to memorialize Tap.

Rock in general,
but Tap specifically.

- Can I ask a question?
- Yes.

There's only four people.

Yeah, but there'll be more.

These are just little models,
aren't they?

So, you're saying this is gonna
be big, like, a real...?

- Not just a toy?
- Oh, yeah, absolutely.

I don't know why
I keep wanting pancakes.

Why is that?

♪ You got problems ♪

♪ Baby, you whine and you beg ♪

♪ When I'm busy ♪

♪ Baby, you wanna dance
With my leg ♪

♪ I'm gonna chain you ♪

♪ I'll make you
Sleep out of doors ♪

♪ You're so fetching
When you're down on all fours ♪

♪ And when you hear
Your master ♪

♪ You will come
A little faster ♪

♪ Thanks to Bitch School ♪

♪ Bitch School ♪

♪ Bitch School ♪

♪ Gonna have to take you
Back to ♪

♪ Bitch School ♪

Attagirl. On the paper.

That's it.

Wow. Wow.

-Hi.
-Fucking brilliant.

Legend. Oh, my gosh.

-Yeah, that's wonderful.
-I love playing with you.

Oh, well, thank you.
I love playing with you.

So, listen,
since we're playing together,

why don't we, uh, play together?

Oh, my gosh, I am...

-I am beyond flattered.
-Well, you know.

I just, I can't believe...
Oh, my God.

Speaking of playing together,
this is my girlfriend.

- Hi!
- Hi, Annie.

-Hi, everyone.
-This is my girlfriend.

- Hi, I'm Annie.
- Annie.

-Great to meet you.
-This is Derek.

Nice to meet you.
Congratulations.

Thank you so much.
I'm the luckiest.

My grandpa took me to see y'all
when I was a little girl.

- Yeah.
- Oh, yeah, it was a good time.

I've been noticing this--
The pedalboard that you have.

- Do you use every single one?
- Every one of them.

This, of course,
you know what this is.

Yeah, that's the pedal.

-Well, no, it's a wah.
-Yeah.

♪ Wah, wah, wah, wah ♪

♪ Wah, wah, wah, wah ♪

♪ Wah, wah, wah, wah... ♪

Well, don't keep doing it.
You're doing it vocally.

-This is doing it for you.
-Oh. Oh, yeah.

-What's that look like to you?
-Like a wedge of cheese.

No, it's a pizza, but now...

It's like someone
singing through a duck.

-And you need that duck sound?
-No.

No, I don't need it,
but I love it.

But you can mix these all up,
that's the beauty of it.

If it weren't for this guitar,
which is amazing.

-It's got the Union Jack on it.
-Yes, that's obvious, isn't it?

But here's the great part.
Look at this.

Oh, look, the Spinal Tap logo.

But this board

can be used as a cutting board
for cheese.

Oh, there's a little piece
of cheese in there.

-There's cheese in here.
-Yeah.

And then, inside it
is the cheese grater.

So, let's say you were playing,
and you play a gig

or just at home, and you think,

"I'd like to have some cheese,

but I don't want to have
to go into the kitchen."

It's right here.
There's an issue, though.

You can't put my favorite cheese
in here.

Why not?

-Stinky?
-Yeah.

-Yeah.
-Smell like a little person

had died in that little hole.

-Right.
-Which would be sad and smelly.

If you're playing loud,

you wouldn't hear
a little person.

"I've got to get out of here."

-Right, right.
-"I've got to get out of here."

"I'm trapped in here,
and I can't get out of here."

But are there people this size?

It could happen, yeah.

Good morning, New Orleans.

This is Spinal Tap.

If you're looking
for a proper ass-kicking...

Come to the Lakefront
Arena Saturday night...

And let Tap tap into
your central nervous system.

Be there!

♪ Make it cash on delivery ♪

♪ If you wanna close
The deal with me ♪

-How's it going?
-Really good.

Are they going to be
sitting down the whole time?

What do you mean?

Are they going to be
sitting down the whole time?

-Because at this moment--
-You mean today?

I mean, in general,
because I'm thinking,

have these people got legs?

You know,
that is where I'm at the--

I just see them sitting down.
Where's the movement?

♪ I'd look somewhere else
If I were you ♪

♪ Cash on delivery ♪

Does Taylor Swift
stand still on stage?

They don't dance, do they?

-Okay.
-They don't dance.

-Has anyone ever seen--
-Oh, my God.

-Well, let's ask the question.
-Dance, dancing.

Is it loud enough?

Gents, it feels static.

- What's that?
- Static. A little--

-You're getting feedback
from that thing.
-No, no, no, no, no.

I mean, are you going to be
sitting down the whole time?

- Sitting down when?
- They're rehearsing.

Here's a lovely little idea.

How about rehearsing
facing the way you're going to?

Eventually, we turn around
the other way.

And when is "eventually"?
Do you have a sort of...

- You want an estimate? Later.
- Yes.

At some point, they're gonna
have to rehearse dances
or other moves--

We talked through the dancing.
You don't have to dance.

Oh, you thinking more
sort of like a Korean boy band?

Is that what you're imagining
in your head?

Well, I manage
a Korean boy band.

They're not Korean,
but they identify as Korean.

- Korean style?
- Yes.

-Yeah.
-They're Nicaraguan, I think.

But anyway, the point is
we are in a post-K-Pop world.

People are going
to expect movement.

Do you know what this sound is?

- What is that sound?
- That's time being wasted, okay?

I'm really sorry,
and he and I will talk.

You're antagonizing them.

-They're children.
-People can't make music...

People can't make music
if they feel like shit.

Well, that's frankly not true.

Secondly, they're children.

They're behaving like children.

You're making it so not fun,

and I really want it to be fun!

-It's not meant to be fun, Hope.
-Why?

Because it's the music business.

-He's shady, I think.
-Yeah. Yeah.

But that's a job
where that's a plus.

You need some shady.
But not all the time.

And we're not saying Slim Shady.
We're just saying shady.

- Just shady.
- Just shady, yeah.

-But he's a bit slim, yeah.
-Yeah, he's slim.

And he does something
I've noticed.

Doesn't button his shirt up.

He doesn't button his shirts, A.

And two, he winks.
You don't trust a winker.

-As opposed to a wanker.
-That's a different thing.

-He's a wanker as well.
-You can always trust a wanker.

That's right. You just,
you know, don't shake his hand.

I've never really done anything

with a band
like Spinal Tap before.

-So, it's a challenge.
-It's fascinating to watch them.

It takes quite a lot
of self-actualization,

uh, not to develop at all,

either musically or personally,
in an entire lifetime.

And I sort of want
to see that up close.

There's a sort of
anthropological interest.

Very good. Now, that's
the perfect pose right there.

You're like the most famous
rock and roll photographer
in the world.

Henry Diltz.
Everybody knows Henry Diltz.

I mean, this is an iconic photo.

Crosby Stills and Nash
sitting on that couch.

So, you don't feel like you're
stealing from yourself in a way?

No. No, just reliving.

Okay. Let's walk over here.

It feels like
you've brought us to a place

where the dead people are,
but we're not dead yet.

No, but we have to start
thinking about that
and get used to it.

We'll take a few.

Real good. Yeah.

That looks fabulous. Here we go.

Yeah, look at that.

And I started thinking about

what I would be like
after I died.

So, it's like
an afterlife thing or...?

Yes, and I'm going, "What now?"

That's what
the premise of this is.

- Lay it on us.
- Yeah.

That's the drum part.

Yeah. We can hear that, yeah.

♪ It's getting near
The final lane ♪

♪ Says a neighbor
Says a friend ♪

♪ But as I take
My final leave ♪

♪ Don't protest
Do not grieve ♪

I'm feeling...

♪ Here's my promise ♪

♪ After I burn ♪

♪ I'm gonna be rocking ♪

♪ In the urn ♪

-Wow.
-That's great.

That repeats,
and there's a bridge.

"One thing I know about
the great hereafter,

I'll still be blitzing eardrums
on the highest rafter.

You think I was hot
at our legendary bashes."

- I mean all of us.
- Yeah, yeah.

"Wait till you see me
when I'm all ashes."

-Oh, bashes, ashes. Good, good.
-Bashes, ashes.

"But a lifetime of loud
helped me learn

I'm gonna be rocking
and rolling and rocking."

♪ Gonna be rocking in the urn ♪

But you did it lower
when you sang it.

♪ I'm gonna be rocking
In the urn ♪

It's got great promise.

It's philosophical.

-It is deep, and it's profound.
-It is deep.

It's as deep as it goes, yeah,
if you think about it.

Check, check,
check, check, check.

This is an exercise regime
to get you on your feet,

up and about, jiggling around.

- Hey, and there they are.
- This is Bob.

Mr. Tufnel, how do you do?
It's a pleasure to meet you.

-Hey, Mr. St. Hubbins.
-St. Hubbins, correct.

-You must be Dr. Smalls.
-I must be Derek Smalls.

How do you do, Derek Smalls?
It's a pleasure to meet you.

My name's Bob Kitness,
Bob Kitness Fitness.

- We're rehearsing here today.
- What's going on?

Well, we're gonna do
a nice workout for you

so that you're ready
for your big presentation.

You look like you've done a bit
of conspicuous consumption.

God knows I have.

-When is this happening?
-The workout?

-Yeah.
-Right now.

Ready? And we're gonna do
a big breath in.

And a big breath out.

And a big breath in.

And a big breath out.

There you go.
Well done, everybody.

Before we get into
the actual workout,

I saw dates of birth
on you fellas,

and it sounds to me
like the candles

are starting to cost
a little bit more than the cake.

But I would like
to ask you a few questions.

These are standard
boilerplate-type questions.

Number one, does anyone
have any penis pain?

They're exercising?
They need to be rehearsing.

They need to be exercising.

Lifting our leg
and twisting around

keeps us nice and fit.

You're kidding.
They're really old, Simon.

Which is precisely why they need
exercising, understand?

♪ Da-da-da-da-da-da ♪

Yeah!

Boy, that's living!

♪ The bigger the cushion
The sweeter the pushin' ♪

♪ That's what I said ♪

♪ The looser the waistband
The deeper the quicksand ♪

♪ So I have read ♪

♪ My baby fits me
Like a flesh tuxedo ♪

♪ I like to sink 'em
With my pink torpedo ♪

♪ Big bottom
Big bottom ♪

♪ Talk about bum cakes
My girl's got 'em ♪

♪ Big bottom
Drive me out of my mind ♪

♪ How could I
Leave this behind? ♪

What the fuck?

What was that?

Was that my guitar doing that?

Well, I prerecorded that.

He farted earlier, recorded it.

That's not clever.

Farts are funny.

I can't argue with you
in-in-in principle,

but I don't think
it's appropriate. Look at this.

I think it could be more subtle.

Like a...

No, imagine
you're on public transport,

and there's an old lady
sitting next to you,

and she's got a little bag,
you know.

She's looking in her bag
for a mint or something.

And then you hear...

And you're trying to be polite.

You look over and try to pretend
that you didn't hear it,

but you can't not have heard it.

So we're on the same page,
you want me to go find

an old lady farting on a bus?

No, not literally.

This is a story.
It didn't actually happen.

You're starting
with "Hell Hole."

No, I was saying tentatively
start with "Majesty."

Oh, "Majesty." That's a good--

It's like an intro.
Come in with the robes.

So, we got kind of a mini set,

a mini inset
of "Clam Caravan" and...

-"Gimme." Yes. Okay.
-..."Gimme." Yes.

And then turn it up again
for "Cash on Delivery."

And then double the tempo
for "Diva Fever."

And then you're gonna
be good to come

after "Gimme Some Money."

♪ Gimme some money ♪

♪ Gimme some money ♪

♪ Gimme some money ♪

♪ Gimme some money ♪

♪ Gimme some money ♪

♪ Gimme some money ♪

♪ Gimme some money ♪

♪ Gimme some money ♪

♪ Gimme some money ♪

♪ Gimme some money ♪

♪ Gimme some money ♪

♪ Ay, ay, ay ♪

All right, wasn't bad.

Musically, you seem to be
grooving pretty good.

I mean, you seem to be gelling,
you know, in rehearsals.

Not to be profound
or anything...

And it would be
a first time for me.

...but I think the more
we retreat into the music,

the more we yield
to the cowardice we feel

about confronting
one another with things,

the nicer things become.

Be honest, how does it look?
No, don't pull too hard.

- Sorry.
- Looks like bug eyes.

Yes, that is the point,
because they are bugs.

I can't see, though.

How-- How would I find
the stage?

Derek, what about that?

- Now you're talking.
- I could see you in that.

-This is perfect. I love this.
-What we could do is...

- Oh, this is me. This is me.
- That looks fantastic.

Oh, this shirt is for my mother.
It's not for you.

She really loves this blouse,
you know.

I have another
really good thing.

- That is... Oh, yes.
- Yes.

-Would you like to put these on?
-I'll try.

The thing about
the glasses is

-they take away something from--
-Like this?

I think that looks
very futuristic.

So, it's all bugs,
is what you've done.

Let me tell you something.
Insect means pestilence.

And what is more rock and roll
than pestilence?

What's more rock and roll than
disease, is what you're saying?

Absolutely.

Derek, you're the glue.
You're the--

He's the elder statesman,
in a way.

And he doesn't want to be
the silly one running about,

because we can run around
and make faces and play.

Who amongst you
is the silly one?

I'd say it's got to be him.

-You're the silly one?
-Yeah.

Mm...

What are you
laughing at?

I've noticed you're happier
than you were.

-Really?
-You used to be gloomy.

I was more sullen?

Well, sullen

and questioning your own...

"Should I be doing this?" And--

Well, I know that, you know,
you weren't all that thrilled

the first time
when the film came out.

You maybe thought
I didn't do you justice.

Do you feel that still?
I mean...

We have taken you off the hook
for the first film.

- That makes me...
- You were there.

You witnessed some of the ups
and some of the downs.

You see, some people think,
"Oh, it was all down."

But you saw things
that were good.

Yes, I saw a lot of good things.

You saw us reach the stage...

-But people do say to us...
-...many the night.

Many times. Sometimes
you couldn't find the stage.

Most of the time we did.
- Other times...

-We did, mostly. Yeah.
-Yeah.

♪ Here she comes
That rainy day sun ♪

♪ Peeking in and out
The falling raindrops ♪

♪ Smiling down on everyone ♪

Gentlemen! Boys, boys, boys!

Oh!

-We have a visitor.
-Hey, everyone.

Oh, a special guest.

Welcome, welcome.

What an honor.
So good to see you.

How much were you aware

of Spinal Tap, you know,
in the early days?

Were you aware of the band?
Did you know about this band?

-Yeah, I knew about the band.
-Yeah?

Um, and, yeah,
I was a big fan, actually.

-Really? I'm surprised.
-They're underrated musicians.

These guys just aren't
a heavy rock and roll band.

-They're really good.
-Right.

For example,
in the bit in "Stonehenge"

where he plays the mandolin.
I love the mandolin.

That's-- Most heavy metal bands
couldn't do that.

Did you recognize that tune?
That was the flip side of--

That was "Rainy Day Sun." Yeah.

Flip side of "Flower People."

-Let's do "Flower People."
-Big fan.

- Would you like to?
- Let's do "Flower People."

Yeah, that would be great.
Yeah. Fantastic, yeah.

I'll just have to follow
you guys, okay?

Okay. We've followed you
many times.

♪ Listen to what
The flower people say ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah ♪

♪ Listen ♪

♪ It's getting louder
Every day ♪

-♪ Listen ♪
- ♪ Shh ♪

♪ It's like a bolt
Out of the blue ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah ♪

♪ Listen ♪

♪ It could be calling now
For you ♪

♪ Flower people, walk on by ♪

♪ Flower people
Don't you cry ♪

-♪ It's not too late ♪
-♪ No ♪

♪ Not too late ♪

♪ It's not too late ♪

♪ No ♪

When they called and asked you,

you said, "Okay, I'll do this"?

Oh, it was an honor. It was like
having your first hit record,

to be asked to do this.
It was like, wow.

Are you kidding me? I didn't
have to even think about it.

Had you ever met
any members of the band?

No, I've never met them.

It's funny that we all
travel around.

You don't meet people
on the road.

You're zigzagging around
and you miss people.

So I've never been
in the same town as them.

-But it's nice
to meet them now.
-Yeah.

I mean, it's, you know,
at this point in their life,

at this point in my life,
it's a great thing to...

Sometimes waiting for something
is even better

than meeting someone earlier on.

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Ah ♪

Okay.

- Wow.
- Oh, yeah.

- Well done.
- Thank you.

You've done this before?

No, but, uh...

It's one of my favorite songs
of yours, that's all.

I never thought I'd get to
actually sing it with you guys.

- Amazing.
- Thank you.

Throw it back at you, yeah.

I wonder if there's a bit
too much piano.

I'm enjoying the singing.
I'm just wondering
if there's too much piano.

-Simon!
-He doesn't understand music.

- I'm so sorry.
- Well, that's mad.

Sir Elton said
he'd like to play with us,

and he's singing and playing.

That's what he does.

You may not have heard
the last 50 years.

But you know what number
he might like to do?

It's called "Stonehenge."

- Okay.
- You aware of the tune?

- Of course.
- -We got the right size this time.

Yeah, it's more dynamic.
It's, you know, very visual.

-It's dramatic as well.
-Well, I can do that.

You want me to do that one?

♪ But late at night
When the boogie's through ♪

♪ I go to bed
Just the same as you ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

What's this?

What's this?

Why are people
falling down a hill?

What does that have
to do with us?

I would like to see
more of it, actually.

Yeah, we'll make you a copy.

Just show the band, all right?
Show the band.

You share such a history,
such a personal history.

Particularly Nigel and David
going back to childhood

and Derek coming in,
you know, in the last...

In our 20s.

- Over 40 years.
- Yeah.

Do you find
those dynamics changing?

Are those relationships
changing?

I think there are differences,
though.

Time goes by and things change
with relationships.

-And...
-Yeah.

But the thing you had as kids...

-Yes.
-...is that still there?

We were close
as small boys, and...

Then you grow away and back
and away and back again, and...

I don't know where it is now.
It's somewhere.

But do you feel
that thing that you had as kids

is still there somewhere or...?

Somewhere.

I'm so used to being, like,

intimate with these guys,
so close,

and obviously,
this is, like, a huge arena.

Is there any way we can push

-this whole rig forward?
-The whole rig?

Like downstage a little bit.

So, I'm noticing
that the pedalboard

-is quite a bit larger...
-It is, yeah.

...than what
you showed me earlier.

-This is the first section.
-Yeah.

-And then it was this one.
-Yeah.

This. They're all
linked together...

-Yeah.
-...by this bit.

Oh, that's
what you call the brain.

-It's the brain, yeah.
-Right.

What do these extra things do?

Well, you can read some of them.

-Yeah, this says--
-To yourself.

-Oh, I shouldn't...
-Yeah.

So, what's your favorite?
Give me a--

The new one
you added that you say,

"Boy, I'm so glad
they added this one."

Ah!

-Yeah, that's a bit annoying.
-Well, to you.

How's it going? Sounding good?

Oh, hello.

Hello, how's it going?

It's nice. It's loud.

- That's your reputation.
- That is. Yeah.

It's what the people want
and indeed need.

Just quickly to say good luck.
I hope it goes
tremendously well.

- Um...
- Yeah.

It should be marvelous.
Everything is set up.

You're in excellent hands
with Hope.

-I have to go.
-What?

I have to meet my birth mother.

- Your what?
- My birth mother.

You're leaving?
You're not gonna be here?

Some things...
I hate to break this to you.

Some things are more important
than rock and roll,
and one of them is family.

- Un-fucking-believable.
- You could wait a day.

You didn't give me
any indication.

- I didn't know.
- It's not good.

Let me ask you this. Is your
birth mother a shark as well?

Is she a shark? Oh, I see.

Uh, well, I know nothing
about her. That's the point.

I think that you've run out
of feeding ground here.

You're off to the next swindle.

-Fucking hell.
-The very best of luck

to all of you. It's been, uh...
It's been an experience,

and something
approaching a pleasure.

Wow.

Hey, "Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare."

We are living it.

One, two, three, four!

♪ I been a rocker
Since I don't know when ♪

♪ I been a roller
Since a way back then ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ But late at night
When the boogie's through ♪

♪ I go to bed
Just the same as you ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ And when the rock 'n' roll
Nightmare comes ♪

♪ The devil's gonna make me
Eat my drums ♪

What's that?

I'm sorry. What is that?
What is that?

Can you stop it?
Can you kill it?

Can you kill it?

-I don't even know
what you're playing.
-It's another voice.

It's a voice. You may not hear
this voice, but I hear it.

I'm lucky to hear my own voice
at this rate.

-I think it's a distraction.
-I think you're on edge.

You are on edge.

Why are you not?

Yeah, let's make use of that.

The Japanese woman being knifed.

She's from Vietnam,
first of all.

All right, fine.

Can we play again?
Can we just play the music?

Let's play the music.

You gotta stop playing
with your train set

and play the music.

You can't do it, can you?
You can't do it.

You can't just play the tune.

-I can.
-You can't.

-I can, and I did it.
-I know what else you did.

October 9th, 2009.

-What are you talking about?
-You know exactly
what I'm talking about.

You fucked my wife.

-I fucked your wife?
-That's what I'm hearing.

-You must be joking.
-That's what I'm saying.

-You must be fucking joking!
-Oh, no, no.

-You must be joking.
-Where's Nigel? Where's Jeanine?

Oh, here they are. They're
together. They're smiling.

I knew what happened.

You have gone mad.

Fucking good grief.

You're fucking mad,
is what you are.

-You're fucking mad.
-Go follow him. Follow him.

There's no fucking way
I would have done that.

Fuck you!

♪ Highway Two now, baby ♪

♪ Run right by my baby's door ♪

♪ Highway Two now, baby ♪

♪ Run right by my baby's door ♪

♪ Well, you know I can't
Get the one I'm loving ♪

♪ I ain't going down
Highway Two no more ♪

♪ Me and my baby
Can't get along ♪

♪ Always down there
By the liquor store... ♪

♪ Waiting for that train
To bring her back ♪

♪ If she's not on the 5:19 ♪

♪ Then I'm gonna know
What sorrow means ♪

♪ And I'm gonna cry, cry, cry
All the way home ♪

♪ All the way home ♪

♪ All the way... ♪

♪ I'm gonna cry, cry, cry
All the way home ♪

Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!

Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!

Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!

Tap! Tap! Tap!

Okay, gents and lady, showtime.

Time to rock and roll.
You ready?

Okay.

Tap! Tap! Tap!

Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!

Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!

-You okay?
-Yeah.

Whatever you did, I forgive you.

I didn't do anything.

Well, then I forgive you
for that.

Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!
Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!

Well, they're not
going anywhere.

What do we do about that?

-Do a show?
-Why not?

They're stuck with us.

Tap! Tap! Tap!

Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!

Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!

Yeah!

Direct from hell, Spinal Tap!

Good evening!

♪ The window's dirty
The mattress stinks ♪

♪ This ain't no place
To be a man ♪

♪ Ain't got no future ♪

♪ Ain't got no past ♪

♪ And I don't think
I ever can ♪

♪ The floor is filthy ♪

♪ The walls are thin ♪

♪ The wind is howling
In my face ♪

♪ The rats are peeling ♪

♪ I'm losing ground ♪

♪ Can't seem to join
The human race ♪

♪ Look out, tell me why then ♪

♪ Oh, I'm living
In a hell hole ♪

♪ Don't want to stay
In this hell hole ♪

Whoo!

♪ Don't want to die ♪

♪ In this hell hole ♪

♪ Girl, get me out
Of this hell hole ♪

♪ No light fantastic
Ever crosses my mind ♪

♪ That meditation stuff ♪

♪ Can make you go blind ♪

♪ Just crank that volume ♪

♪ To the point of pain ♪

♪ Why waste good music
On a brain? ♪

-♪ Heavy ♪
-♪ Heavy ♪

-♪ Duty ♪
-♪ Duty ♪

♪ Heavy-duty rock and roll ♪

-♪ Heavy ♪
-♪ Heavy ♪

-♪ Duty ♪
-♪ Duty ♪

♪ Brings out the duty ♪

♪ In my soul ♪

Yahoo!

♪ There's a pulse
In the newborn sun ♪

♪ A beat in the heat of noon ♪

♪ There's a song
As the day grows long ♪

♪ And a tempo
In the tides of the moon ♪

♪ It's all around us
And it's everywhere ♪

♪ And it's deeper
Than royal blue ♪

♪ Hey ♪

♪ And it feels so real ♪

♪ You can feel the feeling ♪

♪ And that's
The majesty of rock ♪

♪ The pageantry of roll ♪

♪ The ticking of the clock ♪

♪ The wailing of the soul ♪

♪ The prisoner in the dock ♪

♪ The digger in the hole ♪

♪ We're in this together
And ever ♪

In ancient times...

...hundreds of years
before the dawn of history...

Whoo!

...lived a strange
race of people.

The Druids.

No one knows who they were

or what they were doing.

Do "Stonehenge"!

But their legacy
remains hewn

into the living rock...

of Stonehenge.

♪ Stonehenge ♪

♪ Where the demons dwell ♪

♪ Where the banshees live ♪

♪ And they do live well ♪

♪ Stonehenge ♪

♪ Where a man's a man ♪

♪ And the children dance
To the pipes of Pan ♪

♪ Stonehenge ♪

♪ 'Tis a magical place ♪

♪ Where the moon doth rise ♪

♪ With a dragon's face ♪

♪ Stonehenge ♪

♪ Where the virgins lie ♪

♪ And the prayers of devils
Fill the midnight sky-y-y ♪

♪ And you, my love ♪

♪ Won't you take my hand ♪

♪ We'll go back in time ♪

♪ To that mystic land ♪

♪ Where the dewdrops cry ♪

♪ And the cats meow ♪

♪ I will take you there ♪

♪ I will show you how ♪

Oh!

And oh, how they danced,

the little children
of Stonehenge,

beneath the haunted moon,

for fear that daybreak

might come too soon.

Just move it over!

She made me
move the stage forward.

You can't blame her!

Ah! My legs!

Ah!

- David!
- I can't feel my teeth.

I'm stuck down here.

Erase my browsing history.

Get to pulling!

Fuck Spinal Tap!

Hi. David, I'm so sorry.

Where have you been?

I've been sorting out
a lot of the insurance stuff.

-Good.
-How are you doing,
Mr.-- Sir Elton?

I think I have no feeling
in my legs.

I've got plenty in mine.

A huge stone fell on my legs,

and they said I was concussed.

They also said
it really looked great.

I was hearing the buzz that
it really worked theatrically.

How are you doing over there?
You're good?

Oh, yeah. Never felt better.

- You look very well.
- Thank you.

I think, uh...

catastrophic accidents
agree with me.

Now, I can either
put this in the film

or keep it out of the film.

-It's up to you.
-Talk to my manager.

I haven't edited yet.

We-we-we have not signed
any release for this.

Because I can always
have it up to that point.

- Oh, fuck off.
- Okay.

It ended bad. It did end bad.

-Yes.
-I mean, it's press.

-Yeah.
-Like, as in it got
a lot of attention.

Yeah, it did,
and you're of the mind,

any press is good press?

Well, there is a bit of that.

You know, dropping Stonehenge
on a grand piano

and crushing Elton John's legs,
that stays with you, doesn't it?

We're healing up.

Let's say this.
We're healing up.

And do you feel like
you could perform again?

We keep bouncing back
in some form or another.

And this was a tough bounce.

There's no tougher bounce
than having a, you know,

thousand-pound Stonehenge thing
fall on top of you.

Yeah, well, there are
a few blows in life

that might beat that,
but not many.

Yeah. Yeah.

Waking up in a public library,

having passed out
and shat yourself.

That'd be another one.

Have you talked to him
since the hospital?

I have, yeah.

After being in hospital,

we said, you know,
"How are you feeling?"

He's still got this knee thing
where he can't--

Well, he can do this,
but that's all he can do.

Well, then he-- It's like almost
like a Jewish guy davening.

I mean, like at the Wailing Wall
in Israel,

and just go like that.

I guess the question is,
"Now what?"

Do you see a future
for the band?

I don't know. Cruises, maybe.

-Oh, you mean like a--
-Rock and roll cruise.

-On a cruise ship.
-Yeah.

With a lot of older people

who don't have full use
of their limbs.

I put together an a cappella
rap group called Mod Men.

Again, nobody had thought
of a cappella rap groups.

But the problem with
a cappella rap, as it turns out,

is there's a very thin line
between a cappella rap

and simply shouting threats
that rhyme.

I'm looking at Mick Jagger,
who still runs around the stage.

-You're still performing.
-Yeah.

These guys are in their 70s.
They're still performing.

-Yeah.
-I grew up in the '50s,

and Danny & the Juniors said

rock and roll was here to stay.

-Yeah.
-And clearly, he was right.

-They were right.
-Yeah.

What is it? You love to play?

Is that it, or...?

And drugs.

I have decided to write a memoir
of my early years,

the Squatney years, you know,

as a young,
wild teenager in Squatney.

- I was inspired by Bruce's book.
- Bruce Springsteen.

I Am Springsteen
Going on Spreventine.

And then you also like
to invent things.

-I do, yeah.
-I mean, you're an inventor.

I think...

what if you could go on a picnic

and have a folding wine glass?

It's acrylic sides,
four sides with hinges.

Pour the wine...

And that was successful?

-No.
-Yeah.

I'll tell you the truth.

Uh, I had sex with David's wife.

Really? Does David
know about this?

No.

You pretend that you came in.

Okay. Uh, sir, I--

But with a different accent.

Uh, sir?

No. Let's do it the other way.

-All right.
-Do you.

If I brought in a half a wheel

of the San Jorge "Qui-jo"...

What is it, "Que-jo"?

-What's that you're saying?
-It's the name of it.

-"Que-jo"? What's that?
-I don't know that last part.

-Queijo. Queijo.
-Queijo. Queijo.

"Qua--"
-Queijo.

Queijo.

-Queijo.
-We'll save that for another--

So, if I brought in
a half a wheel of the San--

Of which one?

-Queijo.
-Yes?

And you correct me if I'm wrong,

because I could be wrong
about this.

Should we wait until you finish?

Yeah. Finish the sentence,
I think.

Yeah. There's nothing
to correct at this point.

- Okay. Good point.
- I didn't say anything.

Once I say it...

-Then we can correct.
-...then you can correct.

Why? Is there something
I should be corrected on now?

-Not yet.
-No. Not yet.

-Let's wait.
-We'll wait. We'll wait.

I noticed--

Now would be a good time.

I mean, every drummer,
Spinal Tap drummer,

they always wind up
with an unfortunate ending.

And do you feel, like, lucky
that you're the one

that was able to--
To break that curse?

You're the one that survived.

I do. I'm racked
with survivor's guilt.

Yeah, I see you're still
eating healthy.

I'm still trying to ward off the
Grim Reaper as much as I can.

Maybe you have broken the curse
of all those drummers.

You might have been the one
that breaks that curse.

Yeah. Knock on wood.

What? What? What?

Oh. Oh, Jesus. Are you choking?

All right. All right.
Here. Come on. Heimlich.

Here we go. Here we go.

Okay. One more. Okay.