Original subtitles

Come on, give me a peach!

- Gimme one! - Here you are.

Step aside!

Here I come!

His Majesty is here.

- Your Majesty! - Your Majesty!

Keep practicing, my boys.

Give me my sword.

Ah! The sword is broken.

How am I supposed to teach you without a proper weapon?

How disappointing.

That's too bad!

You Majesty, it's not difficult for you to get a great weapon.

I just wonder if Your Majesty is able to travel under the sea.

Under the sea?

There's no place I can't go, be it heaven or sea.

Wonderful. Beneath the waterfall, there's a direct route to the Dragon Palace of the Eastern Sea.

If you're willing to go down there, I'm sure you can find a fine weapon.

Great! Then I shall not worry about it anymore.

Children, wait here. I'll be right back.

- Good bye, Your Majesty! - Please come back early, Your Majesty!

- Where on earth are you from? - What are you doing here?

Oh, it's General Shrimp and General Tortoise. I'm here to see the Dragon King. Please go tell him.

- Take me to him or I'll punch you. - I'll go.

Running!

Here we are. Here we are.

Your Majesty! A strange monkey is barging into the Palace.

Send him away!

Hey, my close neighbor.

What are you doing here?

I live in the Flower-Fruit Mountain.

I have not found myself a weapon. So I've come specially to beg one from you.

Oh, I see.

General Shrimp, go and fetch a spear.

Hey, it's no good.

Go get the 3600-pound sword.

Hey, it's too light for me.

Too light?

I have heavier ones, maybe too heavy.

Bring the 7200-pound halberd.

It's still too light for me. Do you have any heavier ones?

Sorry, Exalted Immortal, that halberd is the heaviest weapon I have in the palace.

Can't you find at least one good weapon in your vast Eastern Sea?

I do have something for you. Come with me.

- Look, Exalted Immortal. - What's this?

It has a long history.

It's the needle that Yu the Great used to fasten the depths of rivers and seas when he brought the waters under control.

Take it if it suits you.

A real treasure it is.

Wonderful. If it were just a little thinner, it would do.

Ah!

Thinner still.

As-You-Will Gold-Banded Cudgel, 36,000 pounds.

Smaller... Smaller... Smaller...

My good neighbor, thank you so much.

Wait! It's the most precious thing in my sea. You can't take it away.

"Take it if it suits you." Didn't you say that?

This is robbery. I'll sue you in the court of Jade Emperor!

Your Majesty,

Sun Wukong, the monkey goblin, has created chaos in the Dragon Palace.

He took away the magic sea-calming needle.

The monkey is very resourceful. If he's not removed, the Dragon Palace will never be at peace,

I humbly beg Your Majesty to bring this monkey fiend to justice.

Where's the monkey fiend from? How has he dared to be so wild?

He's a monkey spirit who attained enlightenment 500 years ago.

He's able to make dragons and tigers submit to him and subdue seas and mountains.

How could this be possible?

Which divine general shall be sent to capture the monkey fiend?

Your Majesty,

In my humble opinion, it would be better to call him to heaven with Your Majesty's decree.

Keep him under control.

If he doesn't behave, it's easier to arrest him that way.

Don't get in the way.

Change!

It's so much fun!

I'll go up there, too!

Ah! It's too hard!

Your Majesty, some old guy from heaven is here to see you.

- Send him in. - Yes, Your Majesty!

Hey!

Who are you? What are you doing here?

I'm from Heaven and I'm here to see your king.

Nobody moves without His Majesty's order.

His Majesty says bring him in.

His Majesty says bring him in.

Good.

I'm Great White Planet from the Celestial Palace.

The Jade Emperor sent me here to invite you to Heaven.

What does he want me to do there?

Take an official position there.

To be an official? I'm not interested.

Heaven is the place where gods and fairies live,

very different from this Flower-Fruit Mountain.

In Heaven, it is resplendent and magnificent; there are exotic flowers and plants everywhere.

There are Milky Way and rainbows.

It would be such a pity if you didn't at least visit the place.

Fine, I'll go with you.

- Your Majesty, we want to go too. - Your Majesty, can we go to heaven as well?

Why not? I'll go first.

You be good at home and practice martial arts. I'll take you there next time.

Be good at home and practice martial arts. We'll take you there next time.

Where is your king?

He has already been far far away. Don't you hurry.

Yes, just go!

Wait!

Where are you from?

Jade Emperor invited me. Get out of my way and let me in!

Do you have the imperial edict with you?

Jade Emperor invited me, why do you keep me out with spears and swords?

Get out of my way. You don't want to annoy me, otherwise...

Stop... Stop...

Are you playing with me? Why don't they let me in?

It's the first time you have come here. They don't know you.

Let him in. This is an immortal from the lower world. I have the imperial edict inviting him here.

Please!

Hey! Hey!

Oh, come on.

Wait a minute, please. I'll inform Jade Emperor of your arrival.

Your Majesty, Sun Wukong has arrived.

Bring him here.

Where is he?

- Here is the monkey. - Hah! So you're not a dummy?

Go and pay your respect to Jade Emperor. Go! Hurry!

Where is Jade Emperor?

There he is. Hurry now and pay your respects.

Get down on your knees.

Your Majesty,

Sun is an immortal from the lower world, he doesn't know the manners of Heaven. Please forgive him.

- Skip the court manners. Wenqu Star. - Yes, Your Majesty.

- Check whether there are any vacant positions. - Yes, Your Majesty.

Give him a minor position.

Your Majesty, a superintendent position is vacant in the Imperial Stables.

Then make him the Protector of Horses in charge of the Stables. You can go now.

Be sure to thank His Majesty for his great kindness.

What does the Protector of Horses do?

You'll be in charge of the Imperial Stables where there are thousands of fine horses.

You are the highest ranking official there. Now you really should thank His Majesty for his great kindness.

Congratulations.

Please, this is not for fun.

The Imperial Stables.

What are you doing? Get up!

Please check the heavenly horses, sir.

They are not taking care of the horses in the way they should?

- Heavenly Lord of Horses. - Yes, sir.

The Protector of Horses is your subordinate.

You should keep an eye on him and take him under your control.

Yes, sir.

All the heavenly horses have become sturdy and tame since you came.

You've done a great job.

The Heavenly Lord of Horses is here. The Protector of Horses, please go out to greet him.

I don't care if he's the Lord of Horses or the Lord of Cattle!

- Heavenly Lord of Horses. - Heavenly Lord of Horses.

Where is the new Protector of Horses?

- He's taming the horses. - Go.

For goodness' sake, who let the heavenly horses out?

Who are you to be so careless here?

You wild monkey! The Jade Emperor made you the Protector of Horses, but you let the horses out without permission!

If one horse gets lost, you'll be punished severely.

Who do you think you are to teach me?

I'm the commissioner sent by Jade Emperor.

I'm asked to take care of you. You'd better take my orders.

Shut up! That old chap invited me here and then assigned someone to oversee me?

How dare you speak of Jade Emperor like that?

- Tie him up! - Yes, sir.

Don't you dare!

Get lost!

Help! Help!

Go tell Jade Emperor,

I'll ask him to pay a price for despising me! I won't be easily bullied!

Your Majesty, something terrible just happened!

The Protector of Horses hit the Lord of Horses and destroyed the Imperial Stables. Now he's gone!

This demon monkey dared to be so rude as to offend the celestial authority?

We must arrest him and punish him.

It was the Lord of Horses' bad manners that ruined the plan.

- I'll have him change his mind and come back. - Wait.

Your Majesty,

this conciliation policy only harms your Imperial dignity.

We should not indulge the demon monkey so much. Please send me to capture him and bring him to justice.

Don't send the troops so easily. It only hurts the army and the soldiers.

Then should we wait till the monkey insults us all?

Then, what you are going to do with him?

He ran out of the Celestial Court without permission.

If this is not severely punished, others will follow him, then Heaven will be in chaos.

You are right. I'm convinced.

Your Majesty.

Your Majesty,

the Protector of Horses has put up a banner and called himself "Great Sage Equaling Heaven" in the Mountain.

How dare he!

Mighty Magic Spirit.

Yes, Your Majesty.

- You spearhead the attack. - Yes, Your Majesty.

Ah! LOOK!

Here comes a fat guy.

Hide!

Who are you?

You little monkey! You can never survive my hammer.

Can you stand up?

- Go! - Yes, Your Majesty.

Monkey fiend, here comes Prince Nezha.

You're still wet behind the ears. Don't talk so big. The Great Sage Equal of Heaven won't hit you.

How dare you to call yourself Great Sage Equal of Heaven? Here, take my spear!

Go and tell Jade Emperor to grant my title,

or I'll fight to his Throne Hall.

Don't laugh yet. I'll come back and flatten this mountain.

I'll be waiting for you.

Your Majesty,

That monkey fiend's magical powers were too far-reaching,

Nezha and Mighty Magic Spirit couldn't defeat him, I beg Your Majesty to send more troops.

So many soldiers couldn't defeat a monkey fiend?

Do you actually need more troops?

He's really too powerful to subdue.

I'd said he has seventy-two different forms and is indeed skilful.

Your Majesty, the monkey even called himself "Great Sage Equaling Heaven".

He said if this title is not granted, he'll fight to the Throne Hall.

What?

I beg Your Majesty to issue another edict and send more troops.

That monkey fiend is indeed powerful.

In my humble opinion, Your Majesty could give him the empty title...

...and then he can be kept in Heaven.

It's not a bad idea. But I'm afraid...

...he'll make trouble again if he stays in Heaven for long.

Your Majesty, there should be no more fights.

The game is not worth the candle.

It's more feasible to put him on house arrest in Heaven.

I think we should follow Great White Planet's advice.

Make him the Guardian of the Peach Orchard.

Try to tame him. Should he cause any more trouble, capture him immediately.

Your Majesty is indeed wise. I'll go and persuade him to Heaven again.

So much fruit here!

- Yummy! - Yummy!

Wait for me.

Your Majesty,

it's a narrow escape. Let's not do that again.

Ah! We've got the spy! We've got the spy!

- What's happening there? - Let's go and have a look.

We've captured a spy, Your Majesty.

Bring him here.

Go over there!

Great Sage,

Oh, it's you. What are you doing here again?

The Jade Emperor sent me. He invites you up to Heaven.

The Jade Emperor? I'm not interested any more.

It was the fault of the Heavenly Lord of Horses. The Jade Emperor has already punished him.

He should have done that a long time ago.

Jade Emperor has given you the title of "Great Sage Equaling Heaven". He invites you up to Heaven.

So the old Jade Emperor admitted defeat?

In the Flower-Fruit Mountain, I'm already the Great Sage Equaling Heaven. I don't need his grant.

I'm not going.

You can leave now. Go away!

This Mountain is abundant in flowers and fruits. And the landscape is great.

Of course.

But, it is nothing compared with...

...the Peach Orchard in Heaven.

What orchard could possibly be better than my Flower-Fruit Mountain?

The Queen Mother's Peach Orchard is the number one wonderland in Heaven.

Its beauty is unmatched!

The fruit here is nothing compared with the peaches there.

I'm not making it up.

The Jade Emperor would like you to be the Guardian of the Peach Orchard.

Such a wonderful place. Don't you want to go and take a look?

Wait a minute. Let me think.

Ok, I'll go with you and take a look.

Congratulations, Great Sage. This way, please.

Where is the Peach Orchard?

Look. The glow there.

- You can go there whenever you want to. - Ok. I'm going right now.

It's you, Great Sage.

I'm the land god of the Peach Orchard. How can I serve you?

- I want to take a look at the garden. - Let me show you the way, Great Sage.

It's a peach garden.

My Great Sage! My Great Sage!

My Great Sage!

My Great Sage!

Great Sage, the peach trees here ripen every 3000 years;

anyone who eats them becomes immortal.

- What? Eat a peach and you become immortal? - That's right.

It makes you immortal.

There are more trees ahead. This way, please.

Great sage,

the trees here ripen every 6000 years;

these peaches can turn ordinary people to celestial beings.

- Great! - Of course.

Ok!

Let me take a bite.

Great Sage, you mustn't.

Why?

You mustn't eat them.

These peaches are especially for the Peach Banquet held by Queen Mother. You cannot eat them now.

Then when can I eat them?

Peaches of nine thousands years...

...will be served during the Peach Banquet.

- You can have as many peaches as you want then. - Show me the 9000-year peaches.

Great Sage, here they are.

These peaches are incredible. It takes 9000 years to ripen.

I see. They blossom and bear fruit once every 9000 years.

Ok. I'll take a walk by myself. You can go and take a break now.

- But I'm supposed to be with you. - Forget it.

I can't wait till the Peach Banquet. I'll eat now.

Dear fairy maidens, forgive me for my late welcome.

Don't bother. Just take us to pick the peaches.

Fairies,

- things are different here. - What happened?

The Jade Emperor has appointed the Great Sage to administer the Orchard.

Please wait here. Let me go and report it first.

What Great Sage?

Whoever he is, he's in no place to mind our business.

Fairies!

Please don't...

All right. I'll report it when he comes back.

Why are there so few peaches this year?

- It seems they've been plucked. - Who dared? Did you do it?

You did it! You did it!

Come over here, sisters! There's a big peach here.

Where is it?

Who is it?

The Queen Mother sent us here to pick peaches. Who are you?

Oh, Queen Mother sent you.

I'm the Great Sage Equaling Heaven. What are you picking the peaches for?

To make preparations for the Peach Banquet.

Interesting, interesting.

Who will be invited to the Banquet?

Lord Lao Zi, Guanyin from the South Sea, the 500 Arhats,

Celestial beings from the upper eight caves, the middle eight caves and the lower eight caves.

Who else?

There are many more. All the celestial immortals are invited.

- Even the Dragon King of the Eastern Sea... - Enough! Will there be a seat for me, the Great Sage?

Great Sage Equaling Heaven? I've never heard of such a title.

An orchard keeper will never be invited to a Banquet in Jade Pool.

So, they tricked me again!

The Jade Emperor bullied me once again! I'll never forgive him!

Come on. Let's go.

Hurry!

Wait!

Freeze!

Jade Emperor, you despised me, but I can sit in a seat of honor as well.

Jade Emperor, fill my cup with wine.

Queen Mother, give me some peaches.

His Majesty made you "Great Sage Equaling Heaven".

Great Sage Equaling Heaven? I've never heard of it.

Jade Emperor, there's no seat for you around me.

Queen Mother, make your banquet jollier.

Bring me more wine.

Children, come, have a drink.

The stuff here is delicious.

I'll take them back and share with my children.

Hey, Jade Emperor. Nobody dares offend you.

But I'd like to change that.

I'll go back to the Flower-Fruit Mountain.

How did I get here, Lord Lao Zi's Residence?

It's tranquil here. I might as well go in and have some fun.

Old chap.

Old chap.

Where has he been?

Old chap.

The alchemy room?

I'd like to visit the place where Lao Zi makes his elixir.

Here're the Golden Elixir Pills made for Jade Emperor.

Jade Emperor, there're no Golden Elixir Pills left for you any more.

Now I'd better go back and have a party with my children.

His Majesty is back?

Come here!

Children, the drinks and dishes are gifts from Jade Emperor and Queen Mother.

Now help yourself.

Damn it!

Wow! So many peaches!

You are amazing, Your Majesty!

These are the peaches from Queen Mother. You will be forever young after you eat them.

This... this is terrible!

Queen Mother.

That monkey is a savage! He ate the immortal peaches.

When he knew he wasn't invited to the Banquet, he cursed Jade Emperor and Queen Mother.

How dare that monkey fiend!

This is a rebellion!

Your Majesty, we must punish the monkey severely.

Here comes Supreme Lord Lao Zi.

- Your Majesty. - Please do not stand on ceremony.

The monkey fiend ate up...

...all the Golden Elixir Pills I made for you.

He's now back in the Flower-Fruit Mountain.

Your Majesty, we must have the monkey captured and brought to justice.

I beg Your Majesty to dispatch the troops right now.

Take 100,000 heavenly soldiers and capture the wretch for punishment.

Yes, Your Majesty!

You bold monkey!

You dared to steal the peaches, the wine and Lord Lao Zi's Elixir Pills.

Yeah! I did it! So what?

You've committed horrible crimes. You'd better go admit your guilt and accept punishment.

You hairy little one, how dare you talk to me like that?

Come out!

- Ambush in front of the mountain. - Yes, Your Majesty!

- Ambush in the back of the mountain. - Yes, Your Majesty!

You must not let go of the monkey!

- Meishan Brothers, - Yes, Sir.

- Go ask Lord Erlang to help capture the monkey. - Yes, Your Majesty!

Charge!

Charge!

Watch this!

" Charge! " Charge!

I'll catch you!

His Majesty, allow me to give Erlang a hand.

Go.

A stealthy attack. Not a true hero's deed...

Monkey fiend, you reap what you sow.

This is the consequence of rebelling against me.

Jade Emperor, you were great.

You sent so many troops and only got me in a stealthy way.

I'll see what you're gonna do to me.

Stop it! You're a dead monkey now!

Execute him!

Shoot the arrows!

What shall we do?

Your Majesty, I'll get rid of him.

Hurry!

Go! Go!

Put the monkey into the furnace.

- Monkey, how do you like it in the furnace? - It's hot in here. Very hot!

It'll be even hotter.

- Blow the fire! - Yes, sir!

- Hey, how do you feel now? - It's much cooler. Comfy!

Alright. I'll keep you cool and comfortable.

Hurry!

Don't you dare underestimate me!

How do you feel now? Still comfortable?

The Monkey has been burnt to ash. Open the furnace now.

Yes, sir!

He's become two golden pills.

Great Sage! Great Sage!

"The Great Sage, Equal of Heaven"