Original subtitles

The Amazing Catfish

I know you've been giving interviews non-stop since 9 AM...

And we're truly grateful of the time you're sharing with us...

about this new album. So, how are you? Tell me...

Please, tell me about the most exciting thing

about your new album and your new single.

Well, you know, the truth is...

it has been 3 years since my last record, 3 years without working in a studio...

With 200,000 Watts of power...

XHMS, directly to your heart! Broadcasting emotions 24 hours a day...

Are you allergic to any medication?

No.

When did you have your last period?

I don't remember.

When was the last time you had sexual relations?

What contraception method do you use?

What does that have to do with it?

We'll have to run some blood tests...

to see if you're not pregnant.

I can't be pregnant, I have food poisoning...

Let's see the tests.

Ale,

have you noticed that the nurse over there walks like you?

Yes! She does!

With her foot to the side, Mom, have you seen her?

Ale, can you hand me the bedpan?

Mom, you can go to the toilet.

I'll leave your stuff here, Mom.

What are you doing, baby?

Wendy, let me do it.

Smiley faces.

Get off!

It's OK or you want it higher'?

It's perfect.

She has to use the gloves, Mom.

I know. Hey, could you get me some green Ruffles?

Ask Wendy.

She kept your pension's money.

Ale, if you knew...

Why didn't you go to Infectology?

There weren't any beds.

Your relatives cannot stay here.

I have more patients.

I need you to leave.

Come on!

Yes, we're leaving.

So you've decided I'm staying?

Ale, sometimes my tolerance drops to zero with you.

With you, I'm always in zeros.

Let's go, Wendy.

Yes...

I have school tomorrow.

Armando, let's go.

I'm staying with Ale, I don't have school tomorrow.

And if you fall asleep?

You don't have diapers.

- Poor baby. - Shut up.

- Stop making fun of him. - He didn't bring diapers.

Stop making fun of him.

Shut up!

Shut up!

You'll need to leave.

Goodbye, mom.

Mariana.

Bye, mom.

Does it hurt when I let go?

It hurts...

Indeed, it is the appendix.

I'll let your family know so they can authorize the procedure.

The appendix is of no use.

Are you alone?

No.

Where is your family?

Outside.

Want some?

Sure?

Come on. Try one!

So what are they going to do to you?

Nothing really...

So what's your illness?

Hum... What's your name?

Claudia.

I'm Martha.

Are you afraid of being here?

Just a little... and you?

No.

Are you pregnant?

No, it's appendicitis.

Hide.

Claudia! Is someone going to pick you up?

No, I'm getting a cab.

No! You just had surgery. We'll give you a ride! Help her...

Don't worry, thank you.

Come on, it's OK!

Help her with her stuff, son.

Get in!

Seriously?

Yes, come on in!

Thanks.

Here... you forgot them.

Come eat with us.

And where are your parents?

They don't live here.

You know? My dad is dead.

She is Mariana, say hello to Claudia.

Hi.

And she is Wendy.

Don't you want to rest for a while, mom?

No, I'm OK. Let's cook!

Hello!

Do you need help with your things?

- Oh, thanks. - Yes?

What's with her?

Your mom... she's crazy.

I'm cool with that, tomorrow is fine.

OK.

Do you need help, mom?

No, I'm doing sausages.

Armando, get the laundry!

You'll all look like sausages after the meal.

And what's your name?

Claudia.

Move on!

Wendy, I was here first.

Your eyelashes are fake, right?

No, they're hers.

Sit down.

Are you OK?

I just had my appendix taken out.

Really?

I can't see a thing.

With aloe, the scar will vanish faster.

Dinner's ready, kids! Come on!

Mariana!

Stop watching TV, Mariana! Turn it off.

Come on Claudia, don't be shy, come to the table.

Where's Claudia going to sit, mom?

Oops... In the garden chair. Bring it inside, sweetie.

Come on.

It's an ugly chair. Sorry!

But it works.

Need help, mom?

No, baby. It's fine.

Dear Lord, please bless this food...

And bless the hands and the people that brought it to this table...

It used to be shorter, right?

I think she's showing off...

and for those who...

Enough, Wendy.

Give us a heart worthy of sharing. Amen.

Do you like chicken soup?

Yes.

It will do you well, you'll see.

Can I get the ketchup, Martha?

Martha? I'm your Mom!

Mom.

When were you born?

December 31st.

What an unlucky date. Are you Capricorn?

Yes, why?

Can you help me?

I can feel it.

Oh Wendy, shut up!

What?

What are Capricorns like?

Have some bread, honey.

Well...

Mariana, come on. Eat some bread!

They are complicated.

Complicated? How?

She's anorexic.

She's lying...

Of course not!

Well, it's very broad.

You prefer the hot-dog to the soup, don't you?

Give her another one, Armando.

- No, that's okay, one is enough, I'm sure. - Sure?

Yes, thank you!

One is enough for her, because she didn't even eat the first one.

Armando... Armando, leave her.

Are you vegetarian?

Oh, good! I always thought being vegetarian is healthier,

but I still can't do it.

I love meat, you know?

Wendy, take me to the bathroom.

Ah! Yes, mom.

Hello? Yes, I can speak now.

Well, the issue is that...

he seems to be upset about something. He ignored me at school...

Armando!

Come on! Ugh, my brother, the crazy one!

She's still asleep.

So, I'll be leaving.

Don't go. Pick a letter.

"A".

We have to say words that begin with A.

If you take too long or say a word that doesn't exist, I'll hit you.

It won't hurt if you don't move.

Ask.

Abandon.

Armando.

Oh, that's cheating.

Of course not. It's my name!

Okay, fine. Anxiolytic

That one doesn't exist.

Of course it does.

Lend me a dictionary.

OK, that's cool! I believe you.

Atlantic.

Apricot

Germany

A...

Come on!

Ale locked it. She was afraid you'd steal something

In that case, I would kidnap you, wouldn't I?

You wouldn't get any money, you'd even help us.

Where did they go?

Back to the hospital.

It's already untangled.

No, it needs more brushing.

Need help?

But do it hard, or it won't work.

Like this?

No, I give you an F. You are looking to the floor.

Hi!

Alejandra took the car. I don't have time to take you to school.

Wendy, I feel super ill, I don't think I'm going.

And you fell asleep over there?

Well, that's where she is!

I think Armando can take the bus alone.

I'm not going alone, Wendy.

If Mariana isn't going, I'm not either.

What's with you, Armando?

“What's with you, Armando?"

Hey, have you seen my cell phone?

It's on you.

No, I have no time...

What if she takes you?

No way, she's crippled. She had surgery, didn't she?

Here... Smile!

Are you staying for a while or are they coming to get you?

No... uh.

My parents are coming... to my house...

so I'm going.

Wait, I wanted to know. I didn't ask you to leave.

It seemed that way.

No, really.

I'll leave the door open, OK?

You guys sort it out, bye.

So...

Can you take us to school?

Do you have a boyfriend?

Yes...

sort of.

And your parents? Aren't they worried about your surgery?

Yes, of course, but we're not that apprehensive.

What's apprehensive?

Like “sensitive”.

We're here.

Need help?

No, I'm OK.

How come you didn't want to attend school?

There's a friend I don't want to see,

she spoke bad about me.

Besides, there's a party tonight,

and I wasn't invited.

Let us in.

It's late, I can't.

Please.

I can't, kid.

She had surgery yesterday and even had to get up to drop us off.

Well, I'm leaving. Bye!

Hey, wait...

So, are you coming or not?

What if we don't enter?

Mariana.

Mariana!

Look...

- Yummy. - Gross!

It looks like you.

Yeah, right.

Where were you?

At school.

How did you get there?

By bus.

What about Wendy?

She couldn't. So Claudia went with us.

I'm going to the clinic, so I can give you a ride.

- No, thanks. - Open the door, Ale!

Claudia, don't go. You're playing hard to get. Claudia!

We play classic Mexican rock.

I hate it that we can only hear AM.

And new music.

Want me to change the station?

Stop!

Do you live alone?

Yes, my parents live in Torreon.

They got me an apartment, so I came here to live.

How do you get along with your parents?

Fine...

Armando, that's awful! Nobody hears that!

I do.

If you don't decide, I'll turn it off.

Let Claudia decide what to hear.

Key to your future...

And now, we have Virgo.

If you don't have a partner yet,

it is very likely that you will find the love of your life.

What's that?

No, Armando.

On the family side, everything will go on unaltered,

something that you will appreciate,

since there will be a lot of changes with the earthquake of love that awaits you.

Hope so.

And speaking of love,

She's good.

We have some greetings...

I live here. Building C, second floor.

Why don't you join us?

Thanks!

Besides, what are you going to do now?

Aren't you going to say goodbye to my mom?

Armando, get in.

I'm telling you, get in Armando!

They all have HIV.

Are you afraid?

No.

It's not contagious.

I'm not eating that.

Mom, just a little more.

Mmm, yummy.

Where's Claudia?

Where Mariana left her.

Surely she freaked out.

Wendy, please stay today in the hospital.

I need to finish this for tomorrow.

I can't. My healing class is tomorrow.

Claudia! That's what I call real food.

Thanks!

Is your wound better?

It only hurts when I laugh.

But you don't even laugh.

Hey ma, by the way,

there's a party tomorrow, can I go?

Whatever Ale says.

Why do you come crying to mom? I've already said you're not going.

But I want to.

Wendy, mom can't be all alone.

Somebody has to stay with her.

I cannot do it.

This is important.

Please Mom, I want to go to the party.

Whatever Ale says.

Don't let her, she's just going to make out.

Shut up, Armando.

Pretty please, ma.

Stop Mariana.

Stop!

Wendy, I cannot stay tonight.

Alejandra, you need to start respecting other people commitments.

You don't even work.

So?

I'm getting paid for this.

You know? I got a life.

I can stay.

See? She can stay.

Seriously?

Yes.

Is there a problem, Mom?

No.

But who will take us to school?

Wendy.

Of course not. You're big enough to go alone.

They can't go alone.

Alejandra, at that age, we used to go to school by bus.

Of course not!

Sure we did.

No!

Don't you need to go home?

If you like, you can go to take a bath or something.

I can stay by myself for a while.

No.

Am I smelling bad already?

No.

I live alone and my parents know I'm here.

What are they like?

My mom...

she hates to spend money...

she steals napkins and sugar cubes from restaurants...

No way!

I'm serious.

When I lived with them, she always used to limit my usage of toilet paper...

only 4 pieces for peeing...

and 8 for everything else...

and my Dad...

I almost don't know him.

These are for Wendy, after... everything happens.

Can you?

It's going to be tough for her.

My husband was really into homeopathy...

I think that's why Wendy loves it.

Your husband... Wendy's dad?

No, no...

let me explain...

I met Alejandra's father at a party, we didn't got married...

I met him at a party...

it lasted what it had to last. And then he disappeared...

then, with Wendy's dad I got married...

but not by the Church...

Rodrigo was really crazy...

it lasted 4 years and I dumped him...

After 3 years...

I met Armando...

Mariana and Armando's dad...

So, when I say “husband", I'm always thinking of him.

He was the one who infected you?

Yes.

At the beginning, when he infected me, I didn't want him around... but...

but later I understood that nobody can turn back time...

and I decided to stay with him until he died.

So, these are for Wendy. You already have the ones for Alejandra, right?

What are you doing?

You look like a pole dancer!

Turn it off.

Mom!

Sweetie, you have to do the dishes.

I'm going.

I'm dying for some chocolates.

Can you swim?

How are you, Mom?

Are those my earrings?

They look good on you.

Thanks.

You got a date.

Don't you want to go to the bathroom, Mom?

No, don't change the subject.

And what did the doctor say?

Is he cute?

Hey, is that yours?

Yes.

Are you leaving?

What time is it?

Around 5.

I still have time to go home. And then work.

Hey, do you really live there?

Yes, why?

Just asking.

I'm taking it home

See you!

Bye.

And what's his name?

Mom, don't ask me in front of her.

Ale! What's his name?

Daniel.

I thought you didn't work here anymore.

Your sick leave wasn't for so many days.

I know, but my surgery had complications, my stitches became infected.

I want you here early tomorrow.

You're going to offer the hair removing wax the whole month.

OK.

And you're only getting paid for what you sell.

Thanks.

Is she OK?

She's asleep.

Did Alejandra ask you to stay?

I can stay if you like.

Why are you here, with us?

Does this make you happy?

The other day I drank it like that, and nothing happened.

I just slept for a whole day.

But nobody noticed me. Not even Ale.

They haven't noticed these yet.

But they will get better with aloe, right?

Yes...

Eat this.

No, not all together.

First all the whites and then we do another load with colors.

What a drag, just like that, all of it together.

No, your mom's robes are going to get stained.

Hey...

What? What's happening?

How can you describe kissing?

Why?

Just to know...

It depends. There are different types of kisses.

There's the “quico”

when it's just lips with lips.

Then, the "vacuum cleaner"

when you use the tongue and everyone's drooling and drooling...

it's really nasty.

Then...

Then, there's the sensitive one...

where...

you close your eyes...

you get closer... and closer...

and you... put your lips together...

and you kiss... till it lasts... and... that's it!

That's it!

That's it!

How many more?

Just two.

And what kind of an actress?

Excuse me?

A cinema actress, or from theatre or television?

I don't know. All of them.

But there are different techniques.

Different “schools”.

Techniques?

What's wrong with you, boy? This smells like pee.

Put it in the washer, come on!

Mom...

What kind of techniques?

Well, I don't know. I remember when I was studying that...

I even recall a book...

Mom!

The sun burned the spearmint!

You left it out in the sun, I told you not to

Armando!

Eu?

I have a surprise for you.

Diapers?

No.

A TV for our room?

No, even better.

Hey, could you help us this week with the electricity bill?

Yep.

Bye, Claudia.

Don't you want to have that amazing hair that the neighbor has?

We all want that: shinny, strong, beautiful hair.

Well, here's advice: to get your hair shinny and stronger,

you need to eat in a healthier way, and include food with Vitamin E...

This Vitamin can be...

What is it?

It's a new hair removing wax. For legs, eyebrows, even the mustache.

Want me to show you?

Well...

Come on... The mustache.

OK.

Oh, it's hot.

Is it painful?

Just a little bit.

It's because of the menopause...

Ouch, that was quick!

Look. And it's for sensitive skin.

It's a lot! What a shame!

Please, get rid of that!

Hey, you were in other place before, right?

Yes, usually at the sausages section.

Yes, you're right. But it's a nice work, right?

To be selling products here?

You meet different people.

Even though you cannot sit, at least you can talk with people and everything.

No, we can't.

No?

I'm sorry.

I'll buy one of this, so that nobody complains about you.

Thank you very much.

What's that?

Christmas time.

Ale, Claudia's here. Open the door.

You're closer, Armando.

Where's my surprise?

Thanks!

And Martha?

She's not here.

Is she OK?

She just went with the neighbor.

All by herself?

Are you OK, Wendy?

Yes, the healing class was amazing today.

Come on, Wendy. Move!

Did you reach your inner child?

Come on, Mariana.

And you left her alone?

Well, it seems that way.

Take that animal off the table.

Can I put it on the floor?

Yes.

Claudia.

Where did you get it?

Should we go for more?

So, they talk here about techniques and stuff, right?

Yep.

Come on, let's go.

Thank you.

There are several books, right?

Yes, there are around...

Thanks!

How long have you been alone?

Since I was two.

My mom died.

And your father?

I don't know.

So there never was this sugar-grabber, toilet-greedy lady?

Mom

What are you doing?

Just talking.

Would you sleep with me?

Yes.

And you can sleep in my bed.

And my papers?

Hold her, I'm going to get her papers.

Is she OK?

Yes, we have to get some tests done.

Can I go?

No, stay with Claudia until we come back.

Ale, do I have to go?

Help me make something up.

It'll be better if you don't go.

You may say you're sick.

Yes, that the wound got worse, or something...

Seriously?

It can happen, right?

“It can happen, right?”

Forget it, I'm going to work.

And you're going to leave us here?

I have to go for my cart. Wait for me. I'll be back soon.

Claudia...

If you like, I can trade you for the sausages.

She's really depressed.

Mariana, where's Armando?

Where can I find shoes here?

Mariana! Where's Armando?

I don't know.

And if he was kidnapped?

Huh, who's going to want him?

Armando! What did I tell you? “Wait for me”.

Blockhead!

Ma'am, do you want some?

No, thank you.

Please...

Do you need some sausages?

What's your name?

Mariana.

Jorge, let's go!

Do you like one? They are sodium free.

I at least have to get that eyeshadow kit, huh?

We'll see.

Keep them like this.

Aren't you staying for the Christmas party?

What party?

The employee's party.

I completely forgot to tell you, but you should stay, it's going to be fun.

I have to take them home.

No, we can stay a little while.

Please?

Ale is not going to like it.

She's with her boyfriend.

Besides, it's too early to go home.

Rum with your punch?

For her. For her.

Thanks.

What is it?

Another beverage.

It tastes like coffee.

This is Ale's money. It was for my shoes.

I really love you.

She is so drunk.

I really love you guys

and my mom too.

I don't want her to die.

Let's finish our traditional Christmas raffle with the 19" television.

The TV goes to...

Samuel Martinez.

Don Samuel, it's for you!

What?

You have just won the TV!

Really?

Yes, it's yours!

Thank you!

Congratulations Mr. Samuel.

Thank you!

Stand up straight. Grab her.

That's good... Wait for me here.

Sorry, Ale, we didn't notice the hour.

He told me he needed space.

That I'm too complicated.

If I could just...

change my character...

my ideas...

If I could... I would change...

my face...

my family...

I would change my whole life.

Here.

What's this?

It's yours.

Mariana...

Claudia.

Claudia.

Would you come with me to the hospital?

Yes.

I forgot her socks.

We can buy some around here.

Wendy can go.

Ale...

- Please wait outside. - What happened?

How are you?

Empty.

Claudia, if you like, I can give you the sausage stand.

No.

Sometimes, I'm so afraid of dying.

Ale!

You know? I've been thinking that we really need some vacations.

Mom, please.

We can go to the beach. It's just 3 hours away from here.

No, you can't.

For two days.

If we fill up the car's tank, we can arrive there and return.

What do you think, Claudia?

Careful! It's glass, honey.

I know, Mom!

Armando!

You were supposed to do laundry yesterday,

and this was supposed to be clean for today.

But it isn't.

Stop fighting!

Alejandra, look, Armando didn't do the laundry.

What do you want me to say?

Well, something. But okay, let's all be hippies!

Why are you taking the fishbowl for?

I'll know.

Hey!

Excuse me!

Need help?

Yep, thanks!

OK, let's go!

- Mom... - Armando...

- ...I made some sandwiches. - ...put this behind you.

Let's go.

Hand me the bag.

Yes, ma.

And now?

Be careful, sweetie.

Here I go.

OK, here I go!

Watch your foot.

Say... Whisky!

Wendy, delete that!

No.

- Come on! - No.

Ale, do they charge you if you take these?

Of course they don't.

No, no... You're going to kill it.

It's cold!

No it's ok!

Take those off, I'll hold you!

No, Mariana, I'll drown.

Don't lean on it so much, you'll throw my mom into the water.

Something bit me!

You have a jellyfish on you leg.

Let's get out, there's probably more around here.

Armando! You have to pee on her leg, that will take care of it.

"The Amazing Cat Fish".

They used to be like that.

- Is that so? - Yes!

Do you think you had as much as I do?

Where do you think you get them?

Wendy, stop touching yourself. People are watching.

What's wrong? Are you ashamed of your body, anorexic?

Hey!

What?

Claudia, can you hand me Timothy?

Hey, you left one bigger than the other!

Your belly button.

What?

- A bee! - What?

Don't run, Armando!

Did the bee sting him?

Mom, the sting!

Need water, mom?

Wait! Just a little bit

Drop the water.

Does it hurt?

Does it still hurt?

Poor baby!

Don't rock her so harsh.

Look, do it like this.

Mariana, hand me the mosquito repellent.

I'm not even near.

Who will be next?

You're the only one left Mariana, in this cursed trip.

- Come here, Ale. - Shut up.

- Let me see. - It was a piece of glass!

Let me see... Let me see...

Your face!

Stop!

Wendy!

What?

Stop! You know what? Let's return to the room!

Pick up your stuff.

Need help?

No, no.

Kids! Mariana! Please, pick up your things.

What did I tell you?

What?

You look like a panda bear.

What? No! Mom!

Mom! What's going on?

You made yourself an eye mask.

No!

Let me serve you.

We'd never had dinner like this before, have we?

We have, right, Wendy?

Yes, but I don't remember anymore.

Obviously.

At least we don't have to fight over the chairs at the hospital to sit for dinner.

Oops, this is cold.

Can you pass the spaghetti? Please?

Thanks.

What do you do for Christmas?

Nothing.

Nothing? Does your family not like you?

Wendy!

The reliable appropriate comment: Wendy

I've never really liked Christmas and even less because it's right before my birthday.

Oh yeah, you're “the new year”.

Yep.

No, no, Wendy.

But it's good!

Share with us, Mariana.

Anyone needs a fork?

Mariana, bring that little bag.

Let me help...

Mom, are you OK? Answer me.

Do you want dessert?

Do you want to return to the room?

Do you want me to stop asking?

No.

What's wrong?

Why is that when we're having a good time, this always happens?

I don't know.

What's wrong?

OK, let's eat one And let's see who eats it faster.

Say "Armando"...

"Armando"...

"Armando"...

"Armando"...

Mom, please!

I'm fine...

Mom, let's go.

I'm fine...

Mom, let's go.

Shh! I want to sleep.

Ale, the papers!

Ale!

“In eight years I've had more than enough time to figure out what to write,

but not enough to know how to act.

I don't want to be left at home, because it may become uncomfortable for you.

And the niches at Church are too expensive,

and you may forget me there.

Because of the movies I always thought I wanted

you to go to the ocean and scatter my ashes,

but after the experience we just had, forget it.

So, I want you to scatter me all over the city

so you remember me wherever you might go.

Ale,

remember to update the car's insurance.

Please, start working on tables, not with the laptop always on your legs...

Just like you, I ended up hating the white sheets.

I'm really sorry for letting you alone with all the burden,

I wish things had been different for you.

Wendy,

on the first drawer on the kitchen I left career information.

Choose a career and if you regret it, it's OK!

You're allowed to have bad decisions.

Please, use a bra, you cannot live without wearing one.

Sunday afternoons are nicer than you think.

And remember, you cannot hide from your troubles.

Mariana,

don't wait 'til the trash can is full in order to

take it out because the kitchen begins to stink...

Use socks at nights to avoid getting the flu.

Take off your makeup at night, your eyes need to be clean.

If you cannot sleep, take a bath with hot water and hug your pillow.

I love you, princess,

I really do.

Armando,

brush your teeth before going to sleep. You already had 3 cavities in a year.

When you feel your lips cracked, use balsam.

Remember your sisters to take you to the dentist,

I don't want to see you toothless by your 18th birthday.

Cut your nails, you always have dust in them

I'm so proud of having such an intelligent son, my beautiful boy.

Claudia,

sighs are a sign that you need a little more air to breathe.

I don't know when I had you, but I'm sure it was with a gorgeous man...

Don't ever leave this family.

And thank you for coming into our lives.