Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:04,213 --> 00:00:06,257
Hey, Rick.
2
00:00:06,340 --> 00:00:08,318
I have to make a project for
the science fair this weekend.
3
00:00:08,342 --> 00:00:09,927
You think you could help me out?
4
00:00:10,011 --> 00:00:11,731
- Whatever.
- Well, I mean, traditionally...
5
00:00:11,804 --> 00:00:14,182
Science fairs are
a father-son thing.
6
00:00:14,265 --> 00:00:17,059
Well, scientifically,
traditions are an idiot thing.
7
00:00:17,143 --> 00:00:18,644
Morty, I think it would
be fun for you
8
00:00:18,728 --> 00:00:21,480
to work on a science project
with your dad.
9
00:00:23,524 --> 00:00:25,443
Uh...
10
00:00:25,526 --> 00:00:28,196
Yeah, dad.
Why don't we do it together?
11
00:00:28,279 --> 00:00:31,073
Yes! You backed the right horse
on this one, son.
12
00:00:31,157 --> 00:00:33,284
We'll get out the crayons,
brew some coffee,
13
00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:35,703
and knock this thing out
in two or three days.
14
00:00:37,163 --> 00:00:38,623
What is my purpose?
15
00:00:38,706 --> 00:00:40,875
Pass the butter.
16
00:00:42,376 --> 00:00:43,961
Thank you.
17
00:00:44,045 --> 00:00:45,630
I popping I
18
00:00:46,881 --> 00:00:48,341
Dad, I need a ride to work.
19
00:00:48,424 --> 00:00:50,218
Maybe Rick can give you a ride.
20
00:00:50,301 --> 00:00:52,094
I'm helping morty with science.
21
00:00:52,178 --> 00:00:54,096
- I'm busy.
- Doing what?
22
00:00:54,180 --> 00:00:56,641
Uh, anything else.
23
00:00:56,724 --> 00:00:58,643
What is my purpose?
24
00:00:58,726 --> 00:01:00,770
You pass butter.
25
00:01:00,853 --> 00:01:02,480
Oh, my god.
26
00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:04,523
Yeah, welcome to the club, pal.
27
00:01:38,849 --> 00:01:40,393
Since when do you have a job?
28
00:01:40,476 --> 00:01:41,394
Since last week.
29
00:01:41,477 --> 00:01:43,288
It's part-time at this
little vintage thrift store.
30
00:01:43,312 --> 00:01:45,648
My boss is this really
smart, eccentric old man
31
00:01:45,731 --> 00:01:47,942
that treats me nice
and values me.
32
00:01:48,025 --> 00:01:49,819
Meow. Can't wait to meet...
33
00:01:49,902 --> 00:01:51,696
This fascinating character.
34
00:01:51,779 --> 00:01:54,323
Please don't.
35
00:01:54,407 --> 00:01:57,201
Oh. Well, when did this
stop being jamba juice?
36
00:01:57,285 --> 00:01:59,453
I've just recently opened
for business,
37
00:01:59,537 --> 00:02:01,622
mister, um, goldenfold.
38
00:02:01,706 --> 00:02:02,999
You know my name?
39
00:02:03,082 --> 00:02:04,792
That's disarming.
40
00:02:04,875 --> 00:02:07,628
I also know you long
for female company.
41
00:02:07,712 --> 00:02:10,756
You know, it has been
lonely since the divorce.
42
00:02:10,840 --> 00:02:13,676
Some voids can't be filled
with jamba juice.
43
00:02:13,759 --> 00:02:17,263
This aftershave makes a
man quite irresistible to women.
44
00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:18,723
Free of charge.
45
00:02:18,806 --> 00:02:21,434
One never pays here...
Not with money.
46
00:02:21,517 --> 00:02:23,436
Nothing to read into
there. Thanks!
47
00:02:23,519 --> 00:02:25,479
Sorry I'm late, Mr. Needful.
48
00:02:25,563 --> 00:02:28,733
This is my grandpa, Rick.
He was just leaving.
49
00:02:28,816 --> 00:02:29,859
Huh.
50
00:02:29,942 --> 00:02:31,736
Tell me, Rick,
what do youdesire?
51
00:02:31,819 --> 00:02:33,738
Eh, I make my own stuff.
52
00:02:33,821 --> 00:02:35,614
So, what are you...
Like, the devil?
53
00:02:35,698 --> 00:02:37,283
- What? Sorry?
- I don't know.
54
00:02:37,366 --> 00:02:40,494
Store comes out of nowhere,
all the shit's old and creepy.
55
00:02:40,578 --> 00:02:42,455
Are you the devil?
A demon? Leprechaun?
56
00:02:42,538 --> 00:02:44,332
- Grandpa Rick!
- Hey, I'm notjudging.
57
00:02:44,415 --> 00:02:46,334
Just like shoot straight.
I'm a man of science.
58
00:02:46,417 --> 00:02:49,170
Ah, then perhaps you could
make use of this.
59
00:02:49,253 --> 00:02:53,174
This microscope reveals things
beyond comprehension.
60
00:03:01,557 --> 00:03:03,476
Grandpa, go home and drink.
61
00:03:05,394 --> 00:03:07,313
Why don't we do a model
of the solar system?
62
00:03:07,396 --> 00:03:09,374
That's what my dad did with me
when I was your age.
63
00:03:09,398 --> 00:03:10,900
Oh, okay.
64
00:03:10,983 --> 00:03:13,569
You know, Rick's in his lab,
making cyborgs
65
00:03:13,652 --> 00:03:15,905
and wormholes
and all that weird stuff,
66
00:03:15,988 --> 00:03:17,740
but this is real science.
67
00:03:17,823 --> 00:03:19,909
A man and his boy,
making planets.
68
00:03:19,992 --> 00:03:22,495
Hey, how about we use
a ping-pong ball for pluto?
69
00:03:22,578 --> 00:03:23,954
And then Jupiter...
70
00:03:24,038 --> 00:03:26,540
Uh, actually, I don't
think pluto's a planet.
71
00:03:28,125 --> 00:03:29,919
Of course pluto's a planet, son.
72
00:03:30,002 --> 00:03:31,796
I learned that
in the third grade.
73
00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:33,547
Well, yeah, but you
know they changed it.
74
00:03:33,631 --> 00:03:35,508
Morty, nobody changed
the planets.
75
00:03:35,591 --> 00:03:37,927
I just googled it.
Pluto's not a planet.
76
00:03:38,010 --> 00:03:39,929
They changed it in 2006.
77
00:03:40,012 --> 00:03:42,640
Yeah, I heard about that, morty.
78
00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:45,518
- And I disagree.
- You disagree?
79
00:03:45,601 --> 00:03:48,020
That's right. It's possible
to disagree in science, morty.
80
00:03:48,104 --> 00:03:49,688
Pluto was a planet.
81
00:03:49,772 --> 00:03:51,412
Some committee of
fancy assholes disagree.
82
00:03:51,440 --> 00:03:53,359
I disagree back.
Give me a ping-pong ball.
83
00:03:53,442 --> 00:03:55,820
Um, okay. I-I just have to...
84
00:03:55,903 --> 00:03:57,663
Go find Rick and go
over my head about pluto?
85
00:03:57,738 --> 00:03:58,864
No. Geez!
86
00:03:58,948 --> 00:04:01,283
I just gotta go
to the bathroom. Damn.
87
00:04:01,367 --> 00:04:04,161
Oh. Okay, good.
88
00:04:04,245 --> 00:04:05,830
This is gonna be fun.
89
00:04:06,914 --> 00:04:08,714
Hey, morty, let me—- let me...
90
00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:10,584
Let me ask you a question
real quick.
91
00:04:10,668 --> 00:04:12,420
Does evil exist, andifso,
92
00:04:12,503 --> 00:04:14,171
can one detect and measure it?
93
00:04:14,255 --> 00:04:16,006
- Um...
- Rhetorical question, morty.
94
00:04:16,090 --> 00:04:18,384
The answer's "yes, you just
have to be a genius."
95
00:04:18,467 --> 00:04:20,302
Cute. Your sister's boss
gave me a microscope
96
00:04:20,386 --> 00:04:21,887
that would have
made me retarded.
97
00:04:21,971 --> 00:04:23,681
Ooh. Oh, boy, Rick.
98
00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:25,742
I'm don't think you're allowed
to say that word, you know?
99
00:04:25,766 --> 00:04:28,060
Morty, I'm not disparaging
the differently abled.
100
00:04:28,144 --> 00:04:30,479
I'm stating the fact that
if I had used this microscope,
101
00:04:30,563 --> 00:04:32,123
it would have made me
mentally retarded.
102
00:04:32,189 --> 00:04:34,567
Okay, yeah, but I don't think
it's about logic, Rick.
103
00:04:34,650 --> 00:04:36,545
I think the word has just
become a symbolic issue for
104
00:04:36,569 --> 00:04:38,988
powerful groups that are
doing the right thing.
105
00:04:39,071 --> 00:04:40,698
Well, that's retarded.
106
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:42,634
- What are you talking about?
- Apparently, nothing.
107
00:04:42,658 --> 00:04:44,618
You asked him if
pluto's a planet, didn't you?
108
00:04:44,702 --> 00:04:45,703
- No!
- It's not.
109
00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:47,204
- Shut up, Rick.
- Whoa.
110
00:04:47,288 --> 00:04:48,873
I don't care what anyone says.
111
00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:51,709
If it can be a planet,
it can be a planet again.
112
00:04:51,792 --> 00:04:54,628
Planet. Planet, planet, planet.
113
00:04:54,712 --> 00:04:57,131
Stay scientific, Jerry.
114
00:04:58,841 --> 00:05:00,759
This aftershave made women
want me,
115
00:05:00,843 --> 00:05:02,761
but it also made me impotent!
116
00:05:02,845 --> 00:05:05,473
A price for everything,
Mr. Goldenfold.
117
00:05:05,556 --> 00:05:07,808
A price for everything.
118
00:05:09,226 --> 00:05:11,520
[Gaspsi oh, my god!
119
00:05:11,604 --> 00:05:14,231
How could I not
see this coming?!
120
00:05:14,315 --> 00:05:17,985
My lust!
121
00:05:18,068 --> 00:05:20,196
My greed!
122
00:05:20,279 --> 00:05:22,781
I deserved this!
123
00:05:22,865 --> 00:05:25,784
This serum should
counteract the negative effects.
124
00:05:25,868 --> 00:05:28,496
Holy cats!
Ladies, let's get out of here.
125
00:05:28,579 --> 00:05:30,498
I haven't learned a thing!
126
00:05:30,581 --> 00:05:31,916
Here.
127
00:05:31,999 --> 00:05:33,667
You can have this back.
128
00:05:33,751 --> 00:05:34,919
You didn't use it?
129
00:05:35,002 --> 00:05:36,795
Sure I did... to develop this.
130
00:05:36,879 --> 00:05:38,881
It detects and catalogs
all your "twilight zone,"
131
00:05:38,964 --> 00:05:41,383
ray bradbury,
"Friday the 13th" the series
132
00:05:41,467 --> 00:05:43,052
voodoo crap magic.
133
00:05:43,135 --> 00:05:44,613
I thought you might
want it so you didn't
134
00:05:44,637 --> 00:05:47,056
accidentally
sell anybody, say...
135
00:05:47,139 --> 00:05:49,600
A typewriter that generates
best-selling murder mysteries
136
00:05:49,683 --> 00:05:52,520
and then makes the murders
happen in real life?
137
00:05:52,603 --> 00:05:53,479
- Ooh.
- Be quiet.
138
00:05:53,562 --> 00:05:54,897
Don't you want to make sure
139
00:05:54,980 --> 00:05:56,482
people know what they're
getting?
140
00:05:56,565 --> 00:05:58,609
You're not intentionally
selling...
141
00:05:58,692 --> 00:06:00,402
Beauty cream that makes
ugly ladies pretty
142
00:06:00,486 --> 00:06:02,655
but also makes them blind?
143
00:06:02,738 --> 00:06:04,657
I find this all quite
preposterous.
144
00:06:04,740 --> 00:06:06,659
Oh, I say, good sir.
Oh, harrumph.
145
00:06:06,742 --> 00:06:09,620
Oh, oh!
146
00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:11,121
That's beautiful.
147
00:06:11,205 --> 00:06:13,958
You know it's gonna be wearing
you in three hours?
148
00:06:14,041 --> 00:06:15,709
Do I need to call the police?
149
00:06:15,793 --> 00:06:17,127
Here, you can use my phone.
150
00:06:17,211 --> 00:06:18,671
Don't worry, it won't
make you deaf
151
00:06:18,754 --> 00:06:20,005
because I'm not a hack.
152
00:06:20,089 --> 00:06:21,423
Hey!
153
00:06:23,092 --> 00:06:24,468
You think you're fucking
so great!
154
00:06:24,552 --> 00:06:26,345
Stop it! No!
155
00:06:26,428 --> 00:06:28,222
Fuck yeah, man.
156
00:06:28,305 --> 00:06:29,974
Stop it right now!
157
00:06:30,057 --> 00:06:32,059
Grandpa Rick,
I like working here.
158
00:06:32,142 --> 00:06:34,228
- You work for the devil.
- So what?
159
00:06:34,311 --> 00:06:35,896
- Both: "So what?"
- Yes!
160
00:06:35,980 --> 00:06:37,565
So what if he's the devil, Rick?
161
00:06:37,648 --> 00:06:39,233
At least the devil has a job.
162
00:06:39,316 --> 00:06:40,985
At least he's active
in the community.
163
00:06:41,068 --> 00:06:42,653
What do you do?
164
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:44,738
You eat our food
and make gadgets.
165
00:06:44,822 --> 00:06:47,116
Buh—bye.
166
00:06:47,199 --> 00:06:48,617
Whoops.
167
00:06:48,701 --> 00:06:50,536
I giggles I
168
00:06:50,619 --> 00:06:52,705
I'm sorry, Mr. Needful.
I'll clean that up.
169
00:06:52,788 --> 00:06:54,558
I don't know what I can do
about the ghost lady
170
00:06:54,582 --> 00:06:56,222
- that came out of it, but...
- It's fine.
171
00:06:56,250 --> 00:06:58,127
Summer, you know,
your grandfather's right.
172
00:06:58,210 --> 00:07:00,921
This store curses people.
That's my business.
173
00:07:01,005 --> 00:07:03,340
Well, yeah.
Fast-food gives people diabetes,
174
00:07:03,424 --> 00:07:05,175
and clothing stores have
sweatshops.
175
00:07:05,259 --> 00:07:07,386
Is there a company hiring
teenagers that isn'z'evil?
176
00:07:07,469 --> 00:07:09,096
This is my firstjob.
177
00:07:09,179 --> 00:07:10,806
You've been nice to me,
Mr. Needful.
178
00:07:10,889 --> 00:07:12,600
You respect me.
179
00:07:12,683 --> 00:07:15,102
Please, call me "the devil."
180
00:07:15,185 --> 00:07:16,937
I'd rather not, actually.
181
00:07:17,021 --> 00:07:18,772
Yes, perhaps not during
business hours.
182
00:07:18,856 --> 00:07:20,774
I told you, I want to
file a declaration
183
00:07:20,858 --> 00:07:22,943
that pluto is a planet.
184
00:07:23,027 --> 00:07:25,279
Well, then my son's going to
fail his science class,
185
00:07:25,362 --> 00:07:27,489
and when that happens,
I'm suing you first.
186
00:07:28,699 --> 00:07:30,826
I think I know what the "a"
in NASA. Stands for.
187
00:07:30,909 --> 00:07:33,704
- Dad, what's your endgame?
- Ain't no game, sucka.
188
00:07:33,787 --> 00:07:35,515
Why don't we just make the solar
system with eight planets?
189
00:07:35,539 --> 00:07:36,749
It's even easier.
190
00:07:36,832 --> 00:07:39,918
Sure, sure, and why don't we
just burn Galileo at the stake
191
00:07:40,002 --> 00:07:41,920
for saying the sun is round?
192
00:07:42,004 --> 00:07:44,131
Science isn't always easy,
morty.
193
00:07:45,257 --> 00:07:47,343
Whoa! Whoa!
194
00:07:47,426 --> 00:07:48,969
What the hell?!
195
00:08:02,274 --> 00:08:04,401
I'm king flippy nips,
ruler of pluto.
196
00:08:04,485 --> 00:08:06,737
We discovered you quite
by accident
197
00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:09,406
during routine surveillance
of your world.
198
00:08:09,490 --> 00:08:12,451
You really gave it to those
guys at NASA.
199
00:08:12,534 --> 00:08:13,952
I was —- you know,
200
00:08:14,036 --> 00:08:16,288
sometimes science is
about conviction.
201
00:08:16,372 --> 00:08:18,791
It'd like to introduce you
to a few people
202
00:08:18,874 --> 00:08:20,793
that very much agree with you.
203
00:08:20,876 --> 00:08:22,628
Oh, I...
204
00:08:22,711 --> 00:08:24,922
Plutonians.
205
00:08:25,005 --> 00:08:26,965
Jerry Smith is a scientist
from earth,
206
00:08:27,049 --> 00:08:30,469
where he's creating a model
of our solar system.
207
00:08:30,552 --> 00:08:33,806
Jerry, tell pluto
about your decision.
208
00:08:35,474 --> 00:08:38,018
Um... pluto's a planet.
209
00:08:39,395 --> 00:08:42,272
Pluto's a fucking planet, bitch!
210
00:08:42,356 --> 00:08:45,818
Oh, man. This is definitely
gonna go to his head.
211
00:08:45,901 --> 00:08:48,954
If it's athletic prowess
you desire, principal vagina,
14504
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish (Latin American)
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof