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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:00,000 Edited at https://subtitletools.com 2 00:00:01,168 --> 00:00:03,580 And now a fireside chat 3 00:00:03,712 --> 00:00:05,452 with the creators of Comedy Central's "South Park, " 4 00:00:05,589 --> 00:00:07,875 Matt Stone and Trey Parker. 5 00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:10,841 [gentle music] 6 00:00:13,347 --> 00:00:15,713 Hi, I'm Trey Parker. -And I'm Matt Stone. 7 00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:18,010 And this here's ole Scratch. Say hi, ole fellow. 8 00:00:18,143 --> 00:00:19,633 We do a show called "South Park." 9 00:00:19,770 --> 00:00:21,635 [both laugh softly] 10 00:00:21,772 --> 00:00:23,933 [male voice] Matt and Trey, tell us a little bit about yourselves. 11 00:00:24,066 --> 00:00:26,853 Well, l-l met Matthew at the University of Colorado 12 00:00:26,985 --> 00:00:28,646 where l was going to film school. 13 00:00:28,779 --> 00:00:31,612 I actually met him in Beginning Filmmaking class. 14 00:00:31,740 --> 00:00:34,231 I met him and found someone who could make me laugh, 15 00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:36,108 even when I felt like crying. 16 00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:40,825 [male voice] Guys, who would you say are your role models? 17 00:00:40,958 --> 00:00:43,324 Well, I'd have to say my biggest role model 18 00:00:43,460 --> 00:00:44,620 is Matt. 19 00:00:44,753 --> 00:00:46,118 I guess I'd have to say mine 20 00:00:46,255 --> 00:00:48,371 is Theodore Roosevelt, for his work 21 00:00:48,507 --> 00:00:50,623 with the Rough Riders in the Spanish American War. 22 00:00:50,759 --> 00:00:52,920 [male voice] Matt and Trey, tell us about this episode. 23 00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:55,089 This episode is called "Cartman Gets an Anal Probe," 24 00:00:55,222 --> 00:00:57,087 and it's our favorite episode. 25 00:00:57,224 --> 00:01:00,011 In it, Kyle's baby brother Ike gets abducted by aliens, 26 00:01:00,143 --> 00:01:03,055 and Cartman has strange things implanted in his ass. 27 00:01:03,188 --> 00:01:04,894 I think that the reason this episode is-- 28 00:01:05,023 --> 00:01:06,854 well, ole Scratch's favorite, anyway, 29 00:01:06,984 --> 00:01:08,474 is because it's the only episode that 30 00:01:08,610 --> 00:01:11,272 Matt and | animated completely by ourselves. 31 00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:13,521 You see, this was the pilot episode, 32 00:01:13,657 --> 00:01:15,443 done before we had a series. 33 00:01:15,576 --> 00:01:17,783 So Matt and I had to do the whole thing by ourselves. 34 00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:19,776 For several months, we were locked into 35 00:01:19,913 --> 00:01:22,529 a cold, dark, little room 36 00:01:22,666 --> 00:01:25,032 for long periods of time. 37 00:01:25,168 --> 00:01:28,126 [male voice] You know, that "Kick the Baby" game looks like fun. 38 00:01:28,255 --> 00:01:29,791 Have you guys ever played it personally? 39 00:01:29,923 --> 00:01:32,209 Well, neither Trey or l have children. 40 00:01:32,342 --> 00:01:33,878 That's right, the only family we have 41 00:01:34,011 --> 00:01:36,218 is each other and ole Scratch here. 42 00:01:36,346 --> 00:01:39,884 We're not married yet. - We can't even get dates. 43 00:01:40,017 --> 00:01:42,099 But the truth is, until we have children, 44 00:01:42,227 --> 00:01:44,468 we're not gonna know whether or not we're gonna kick them. 45 00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:47,645 [male voice] You guys seem to write alien encounter material 46 00:01:47,774 --> 00:01:50,015 with a certain, uh, knowledge. 47 00:01:50,152 --> 00:01:53,770 Have either of you actually ever been abducted? 48 00:01:55,365 --> 00:01:57,651 Trey, it's okay. 49 00:01:57,784 --> 00:01:59,991 Go ahead and tell. 50 00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:01,906 I grew up very near to South Park, 51 00:02:02,039 --> 00:02:04,530 and so I was abducted when l was a small child. 52 00:02:04,666 --> 00:02:06,156 I remember the experience. 53 00:02:06,293 --> 00:02:08,375 I remember how horrible it was. 54 00:02:08,503 --> 00:02:10,664 I remember too much. 55 00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:14,798 So sit back, relax, and enjoy 56 00:02:14,926 --> 00:02:16,541 "Cartman Gets an Anal Probe." 57 00:02:16,678 --> 00:02:18,214 [gentle music] 58 00:02:25,354 --> 00:02:28,687 [twangy music] 59 00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:30,180 J‘ I'm going down to South Park J‘ 60 00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:32,182 J‘ Gonna have myself a time J‘ 61 00:02:32,319 --> 00:02:33,900 all: J‘ Friendly faces everywhere J‘ 62 00:02:34,029 --> 00:02:35,439 J‘ Humble folks without temptation J‘ 63 00:02:35,572 --> 00:02:36,903 - J‘ Going down to South Park J‘ 64 00:02:37,032 --> 00:02:38,738 J‘ Gonna leave my woes behind I 65 00:02:38,867 --> 00:02:40,448 - J‘Ample parking day or night J‘ 66 00:02:40,577 --> 00:02:41,942 J‘ People spouting: "Howdy neighbor!" J‘ 67 00:02:42,079 --> 00:02:43,444 - J‘ Headed on up to South Park J‘ 68 00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:45,195 J‘ Gonna see if I can't unwind J‘ 69 00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:48,369 - [singing indistinctly] 70 00:02:48,502 --> 00:02:49,867 - J‘ So come on down to South Park J‘ 71 00:02:50,003 --> 00:02:51,664 J‘ And meet some friends of mine J‘ 72 00:02:52,798 --> 00:02:55,210 all: J‘ School days school days teachers... J‘ 73 00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:57,173 Ah, damn it, my little brother's trying to follow me 74 00:02:57,302 --> 00:02:59,588 to school again. - [babbling] 75 00:02:59,721 --> 00:03:01,928 Ike, you can't come to school with me. 76 00:03:02,057 --> 00:03:04,013 [babbling] - Yeah, go home, 77 00:03:04,142 --> 00:03:05,598 you little dildo. 78 00:03:05,727 --> 00:03:07,092 Dude, don't call my brother a dildo. 79 00:03:07,229 --> 00:03:09,311 What's a dildo? - I don't know. 80 00:03:09,439 --> 00:03:10,929 And I'll bet Cartman doesn't know either. 81 00:03:11,066 --> 00:03:12,351 I know what it means. 82 00:03:12,484 --> 00:03:13,974 Well, what? 83 00:03:14,111 --> 00:03:15,817 I'm not telling you. 84 00:03:15,946 --> 00:03:16,981 - What's a dildo, Kenny? 85 00:03:17,114 --> 00:03:19,321 - [mumbling] 86 00:03:19,449 --> 00:03:21,280 [laughter] 87 00:03:21,410 --> 00:03:23,901 Yeah, that's what Kyle's little brother is, all right. 88 00:03:24,037 --> 00:03:25,402 [cries] - Ow. 89 00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:27,404 [laughs] - Dude, that kicks ass. 90 00:03:27,541 --> 00:03:28,826 Yeah, check this one out. 91 00:03:28,959 --> 00:03:30,540 Ready, Ike? Kick the baby. 92 00:03:30,669 --> 00:03:31,954 Don't kick the baby. 93 00:03:32,087 --> 00:03:33,167 Kick the baby. 94 00:03:33,296 --> 00:03:34,285 Aah! 95 00:03:35,424 --> 00:03:36,584 [yawns] 96 00:03:36,717 --> 00:03:38,378 Whoa, Cartman, 97 00:03:38,510 --> 00:03:40,296 looks like you didn't get much sleep last night. 98 00:03:40,429 --> 00:03:42,340 That's because I was having these bogus nightmares. 99 00:03:42,472 --> 00:03:44,053 Really? What about? 100 00:03:44,182 --> 00:03:46,093 Well, I dreamt that I was lying in my bed, 101 00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:47,466 in the dark. 102 00:03:47,602 --> 00:03:49,217 When all of a sudden 103 00:03:49,354 --> 00:03:51,140 this bright blue light filled the room. 104 00:03:51,273 --> 00:03:52,979 [ship whirring] 105 00:03:53,108 --> 00:03:55,099 And slowly my bedroom door began to open. 106 00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:56,850 And then the next thing I remember, 107 00:03:56,987 --> 00:03:58,477 I was being drug through a hallway. 108 00:03:58,613 --> 00:03:59,944 [whines] 109 00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:01,779 Then I was lying on a table, 110 00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:04,399 and these scary aliens wanted to operate on me. 111 00:04:04,536 --> 00:04:06,948 And they had big heads and big black eyes. 112 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:08,866 Dude, visitors. - Totally. 113 00:04:08,999 --> 00:04:10,910 What? - That wasn't a dream, Cartman. 114 00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:12,578 Those were visitors. 115 00:04:12,711 --> 00:04:13,996 No, it wasjust a dream. My mom said so. 116 00:04:14,129 --> 00:04:15,665 Visitors are real. - Yeah. 117 00:04:15,797 --> 00:04:17,253 They abduct people and they mutilate cows. 118 00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:18,792 Oh, shut up, you guys, 119 00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:19,880 you're just trying to make me scared. 120 00:04:20,010 --> 00:04:22,422 And it's not working. 121 00:04:22,554 --> 00:04:23,919 Hello there, children. 122 00:04:24,055 --> 00:04:25,465 all: Hey, Chef. 123 00:04:25,599 --> 00:04:26,964 What's gonna be for lunch today, Chef? 124 00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:28,510 Well, today it's Salisbury steak 125 00:04:28,643 --> 00:04:30,224 with buttered noodles and a choice 126 00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:32,218 of green bean casserole or vegetable medley. 127 00:04:32,355 --> 00:04:33,640 Kick ass. 128 00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:35,184 Say, did any of you children 129 00:04:35,317 --> 00:04:36,602 see the alien spaceship last night? 130 00:04:36,735 --> 00:04:38,145 Huh? - Yeah, fat boy saw it. 131 00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:40,735 No, that-- that was just a dream. 132 00:04:40,864 --> 00:04:42,729 And I'm not fat. I'm big boned. 133 00:04:42,866 --> 00:04:44,731 Oh, was it the ones with the big long heads 134 00:04:44,868 --> 00:04:46,278 and the black eyes? 135 00:04:46,411 --> 00:04:47,867 Oh! - They took him on their ship. 136 00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:50,362 Oh, did they give you an anal probe? 137 00:04:50,499 --> 00:04:52,239 Oh! - What's an anal probe? 138 00:04:52,375 --> 00:04:53,990 That's when they put this big metal hoop-a-joop 139 00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:55,742 up your butt. 140 00:04:55,879 --> 00:04:57,494 Whoa, they gave you an anal probe, Cartman? 141 00:04:57,631 --> 00:05:00,589 No, I mean... why would they do that? 142 00:05:00,717 --> 00:05:02,048 Dude, they did, huh? 143 00:05:02,177 --> 00:05:03,337 Aliens stuck stuff up your ass. 144 00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:05,210 No. - An probe. 145 00:05:05,347 --> 00:05:06,712 Shut up, dildo. 146 00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:08,258 Well, I got to get to the cafeteria. 147 00:05:08,391 --> 00:05:09,847 You children watch that fat boy, now. 148 00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:11,841 He could be under alien control. 149 00:05:11,978 --> 00:05:14,219 [eerie music] 150 00:05:14,356 --> 00:05:15,971 [hip-hop playing] 151 00:05:16,107 --> 00:05:17,438 We told you they were real, Cartman. 152 00:05:17,567 --> 00:05:19,228 Sorry to hear about your ass. 153 00:05:19,361 --> 00:05:21,272 God damn it, they didn't do anything to my ass. 154 00:05:21,404 --> 00:05:23,144 It was just a dream. 155 00:05:26,117 --> 00:05:27,527 Why you walking so funny, Cartman? 156 00:05:27,661 --> 00:05:29,026 Shut up. - [babbles] 157 00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:30,527 No, Ike, go home. - [squeals] 158 00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:32,871 This is it, this one's for the game. 159 00:05:32,999 --> 00:05:34,864 [babbles] - Kick the baby. 160 00:05:35,001 --> 00:05:38,368 Uaughs] 161 00:05:38,505 --> 00:05:39,915 Good morning, Miss Crabtree. 162 00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:42,164 Sit down, we're running late! 163 00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:47,677 Damn it, he's still there. 164 00:05:47,806 --> 00:05:49,296 Oh, don't worry about him. 165 00:05:49,432 --> 00:05:50,922 No, dude, if something happens to him, 166 00:05:51,059 --> 00:05:52,390 my parents are gonna blame me. 167 00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:54,680 Sit down back there! Aah! 168 00:05:54,813 --> 00:05:56,804 Yeah, whatever, you fat bitch. 169 00:05:56,940 --> 00:05:58,100 What did you say? 170 00:05:58,233 --> 00:05:59,643 I said I have a bad itch. 171 00:05:59,776 --> 00:06:00,811 Oh. 172 00:06:00,944 --> 00:06:03,731 gasps} Oh, my God! 173 00:06:03,864 --> 00:06:04,728 Visitors. 174 00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:06,196 [mumbling] 175 00:06:06,324 --> 00:06:09,441 Ike! Stop the bus! 176 00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:11,819 Miss Crabtree, you have to stop this bus. 177 00:06:11,955 --> 00:06:14,287 Do you want an office referral? 178 00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:15,952 No. - Then sit down! 179 00:06:16,084 --> 00:06:16,948 But I... 180 00:06:17,085 --> 00:06:20,168 [both screaming] 181 00:06:20,297 --> 00:06:22,458 Aah! 182 00:06:24,259 --> 00:06:26,625 Cartman, are those the same visitors you saw? 183 00:06:26,761 --> 00:06:28,501 Shut up, you guys, it's not working. 184 00:06:28,638 --> 00:06:29,969 We have to do something. 185 00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:31,258 Well, we can't do anything for now. 186 00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,597 That fat bitch won't let us. 187 00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,432 What did you say? 188 00:06:34,561 --> 00:06:36,552 I said that rabbits eat lettuce. 189 00:06:36,688 --> 00:06:39,646 Oh. Well, yes, they certainly do. 190 00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:41,389 [children groan] 191 00:06:41,526 --> 00:06:43,016 What am I gonna do? 192 00:06:43,153 --> 00:06:44,939 My little brother's been abducted by aliens. 193 00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:46,356 [farts] You farted. 194 00:06:46,489 --> 00:06:48,070 [laughter] 195 00:06:48,199 --> 00:06:50,315 Somebody's baking brownies. 196 00:06:50,452 --> 00:06:53,319 [twangy music] 197 00:06:53,455 --> 00:06:55,070 J‘J‘ 198 00:06:56,583 --> 00:06:58,164 That's the third cow this month. 199 00:06:58,293 --> 00:07:00,705 At this rate, all my cattle are gonna die 200 00:07:00,837 --> 00:07:02,247 before the winter's through. 201 00:07:02,380 --> 00:07:03,745 [cows moo curiously] 202 00:07:03,882 --> 00:07:05,372 This is nothing out of the unusual. 203 00:07:05,508 --> 00:07:09,092 Cows turn themselves inside out all the time. 204 00:07:09,220 --> 00:07:12,462 People been saying they've been seeing UFOs around. 205 00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:14,305 UFOs? Uaughs] 206 00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:17,676 Yeah, and black army CIA helicopters and trucks. 207 00:07:17,812 --> 00:07:21,020 That's the silliest thing I've ever heard. 208 00:07:23,401 --> 00:07:24,686 What was that? 209 00:07:24,819 --> 00:07:26,559 That--that was a pigeon. 210 00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:28,561 What am I supposed to do, Barbrady? 211 00:07:28,698 --> 00:07:31,030 Just stand here and watch my cattle 212 00:07:31,159 --> 00:07:32,865 get mutilated one by one? 213 00:07:32,994 --> 00:07:36,111 [whistling] 214 00:07:36,247 --> 00:07:37,282 [cows mooing excitedly] 215 00:07:37,415 --> 00:07:39,451 Hey, my cattle! 216 00:07:39,584 --> 00:07:42,872 [mooing continues] 217 00:07:43,004 --> 00:07:44,369 You see? 218 00:07:44,506 --> 00:07:46,121 There is something funny going on. 219 00:07:46,257 --> 00:07:47,963 There's nothing funny going on. 220 00:07:48,093 --> 00:07:50,004 I'll get those cows back. 221 00:07:52,472 --> 00:07:53,962 And now, children, 222 00:07:54,099 --> 00:07:56,010 our friend Mr. Hat is going to tell us 223 00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,803 about Christopher Columbus. 224 00:07:57,936 --> 00:07:59,722 That's right, Mr. Garrison, 225 00:07:59,854 --> 00:08:02,596 Christopher Columbus discovered America, 226 00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:04,939 and was the Indians' best friend. 227 00:08:05,068 --> 00:08:07,434 He helped the Indians win their war against 228 00:08:07,570 --> 00:08:08,980 Frederick Douglas, 229 00:08:09,114 --> 00:08:11,856 and freed the Hebrews from Napoleon. 230 00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:13,323 And discovered France. 231 00:08:13,451 --> 00:08:14,987 Oh, man. I can't just sit here. 232 00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:16,530 I have to help my stupid brother. 233 00:08:16,663 --> 00:08:17,948 I'll come home without him 234 00:08:18,081 --> 00:08:19,321 and my dad will start yelling, 235 00:08:19,457 --> 00:08:21,288 "Where's your brother, Kyle? 236 00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:23,124 You weren't looking out for your little brother, Kyle." 237 00:08:23,253 --> 00:08:24,834 Okay, okay, let's ditch school and go find him. 238 00:08:24,963 --> 00:08:25,998 "You know he can't think on his own, Kyle. 239 00:08:26,131 --> 00:08:27,496 "Brush and floss, Kyle. 240 00:08:27,632 --> 00:08:28,917 Where has that finger been, Kyle?" 241 00:08:29,050 --> 00:08:30,130 Dude. 242 00:08:30,260 --> 00:08:31,625 Is there a problem, boys? 243 00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:33,126 Yes, Mr. Garrison, I have to go now. 244 00:08:33,263 --> 00:08:34,878 Oh really, Kyle? 245 00:08:35,015 --> 00:08:36,551 What is it this time, another prostate tumor? 246 00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:38,765 No, my little brother's been abducted by aliens. 247 00:08:40,186 --> 00:08:41,801 It's true. Ask Cartman. 248 00:08:41,938 --> 00:08:43,724 They gave him an anal probe. 249 00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:46,098 [laughs sheepishly, stammers] That's a little joke. 250 00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:48,691 Mr. Garrison, seriously, I have to go. 251 00:08:48,820 --> 00:08:50,685 Can I please be excused from class? 252 00:08:50,822 --> 00:08:52,437 I don't know, Kyle. Did you ask Mr. Hat? 253 00:08:52,574 --> 00:08:55,065 I don't want to ask Mr. Hat! 254 00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:56,657 I'm asking you! 255 00:08:56,786 --> 00:08:58,401 Oh, I think you should ask Mr. Hat. 256 00:08:58,538 --> 00:09:01,154 Mr. Hat, may I please be excused from class? 257 00:09:01,291 --> 00:09:03,122 Well, Kyle, no. 258 00:09:03,251 --> 00:09:05,162 You hear me? You go to hell. 259 00:09:05,295 --> 00:09:06,956 You go to hell and you die. 260 00:09:07,088 --> 00:09:09,124 Hm, I guess you'll have to take your seat, Kyle. 261 00:09:09,257 --> 00:09:10,463 Damn it. 262 00:09:10,592 --> 00:09:12,253 Ha-ha, Mr. Hat yelled at you. 263 00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:14,592 [farts violently] Ow, my ass! 264 00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:15,927 Damn, Cartman. 265 00:09:16,056 --> 00:09:17,216 [farting violently] 266 00:09:17,348 --> 00:09:19,054 Ow, my ass! 267 00:09:19,184 --> 00:09:20,720 Dude, he's farting fire. 268 00:09:20,852 --> 00:09:22,342 It's the alien anal probe. 269 00:09:22,479 --> 00:09:24,344 It's shooting fire from Cartman's rectum. 270 00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:26,346 No, that was just a dream. 271 00:09:26,483 --> 00:09:27,939 Eric, do you need to sit in the corner 272 00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:29,979 until your flaming gas is under control? 273 00:09:30,111 --> 00:09:32,648 No, Mr. Garrison, I'm fine. 274 00:09:32,781 --> 00:09:34,191 [farts violently] 275 00:09:34,324 --> 00:09:35,734 [screaming] 276 00:09:39,537 --> 00:09:42,404 [twangy music] 277 00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:45,953 J‘J‘ 278 00:09:46,086 --> 00:09:48,372 Hey, you cows can't get on this train. 279 00:09:48,505 --> 00:09:50,245 This is a people train. 280 00:09:50,381 --> 00:09:52,497 You cows have no business on a people train, all right? 281 00:09:52,634 --> 00:09:54,545 'cause you're cows. 282 00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:56,338 No, no, no. 283 00:09:56,471 --> 00:09:59,588 Don't try any of that cow hypnosis on me, all right? 284 00:09:59,724 --> 00:10:01,214 'Cause it's not gonna work. 285 00:10:01,351 --> 00:10:03,057 Hold it right there, cows. 286 00:10:03,186 --> 00:10:04,392 [cows mooing] 287 00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:06,386 Come back here. [exclaims] 288 00:10:07,899 --> 00:10:11,483 [indistinct chatter] 289 00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:13,818 [farts violently] Aah! 290 00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,903 Ooh. I sure am hungry. 291 00:10:16,032 --> 00:10:17,897 How can you eat when you're farting fire? 292 00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:20,616 Shut up, dude, you're being totally immature. 293 00:10:20,745 --> 00:10:22,451 Hey, look, there's Wendy Testaburger. 294 00:10:22,580 --> 00:10:24,536 [gasps] Where? 295 00:10:24,666 --> 00:10:27,533 [romantic music] 296 00:10:27,669 --> 00:10:34,541 J‘J‘ 297 00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:44,550 J‘ Stan wants to kiss Wendy Testaburger J‘ 298 00:10:44,686 --> 00:10:46,551 Shut up, fat ass. I don't even like her. 299 00:10:46,688 --> 00:10:49,100 I'm not fat and you obviously like her 300 00:10:49,232 --> 00:10:51,063 because you throw up every time she talks to you. 301 00:10:51,192 --> 00:10:52,432 I do not. 302 00:10:52,569 --> 00:10:54,480 Hi, guys. all: Hi, Wendy. 303 00:10:54,612 --> 00:10:56,523 Here, Stan, this is for you. 304 00:10:56,656 --> 00:10:57,896 [vomits] - Eww. 305 00:10:58,032 --> 00:10:59,363 all: Bye, Wendy. 306 00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:01,778 Dude, what does the note say? 307 00:11:01,911 --> 00:11:03,492 Holy crap, 308 00:11:03,621 --> 00:11:05,452 it says she wants to meet me at Stark's Pond 309 00:11:05,582 --> 00:11:06,913 afierschooL 310 00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:08,156 Whoa, maybe you can kiss her. 311 00:11:08,293 --> 00:11:09,408 Or slip her the tongue. 312 00:11:09,544 --> 00:11:11,455 [mumbling] 313 00:11:11,588 --> 00:11:14,421 What, how do you know she has a cat? 314 00:11:15,466 --> 00:11:18,583 [laughter] 315 00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:20,256 Come on, you guys, 316 00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:21,844 we need to figure out how to get out of school 317 00:11:21,973 --> 00:11:23,338 so we can get my little brother back. 318 00:11:23,474 --> 00:11:24,964 Hello there, children. all: Hey Chef. 319 00:11:25,101 --> 00:11:26,341 How are you doing? - Bad. 320 00:11:26,477 --> 00:11:27,933 Why bad? - Chef, 321 00:11:28,062 --> 00:11:29,177 have you ever had something happen to you 322 00:11:29,314 --> 00:11:30,554 but nobody believed you? 323 00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:32,681 Oh, children, children. 324 00:11:32,817 --> 00:11:34,728 That's a problem we've all had to face 325 00:11:34,861 --> 00:11:36,271 at some time or another. 326 00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:38,611 Here, let me sing you a little song. 327 00:11:38,740 --> 00:11:40,571 It might clear things up. 328 00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:44,409 J‘ I'm gonna make love to you woman J‘ 329 00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:47,950 J‘ Gonna lay you down by the fire J‘ 330 00:11:48,082 --> 00:11:50,869 J‘ And caress your womanly body J‘ 331 00:11:51,002 --> 00:11:54,335 J‘ Make you moan and perspire J‘ 332 00:11:54,464 --> 00:11:55,954 J‘ Gonna get J‘ - Uh, Chef? 333 00:11:56,090 --> 00:11:57,626 J‘ Those juices flowing J‘ - Chef. 334 00:11:57,759 --> 00:11:59,545 J‘ We're making love baby J‘ - Chef! 335 00:11:59,677 --> 00:12:01,793 J‘ Love baby love love love love baby J‘ 336 00:12:01,930 --> 00:12:02,794 Chef! 337 00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:05,593 Huh? 338 00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:07,761 Do you feel better? - No. 339 00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:09,930 Oh, come on, children, what can be so bad? 340 00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:12,975 It's Salisbury steak day. 341 00:12:13,107 --> 00:12:14,597 Visitors took Kyle's baby brother. 342 00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:16,190 What? [items clattering] 343 00:12:16,319 --> 00:12:18,025 What the hell do you think you're doing 344 00:12:18,154 --> 00:12:19,564 in school eating Salisbury steak? 345 00:12:19,697 --> 00:12:21,233 Go find him, damn it. 346 00:12:21,366 --> 00:12:22,606 Mr. Garrison won't let us out of school. 347 00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:23,731 He thinks we're making it up. 348 00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:25,153 You are making it up. 349 00:12:25,286 --> 00:12:26,241 [farts violently] 350 00:12:26,371 --> 00:12:30,114 [mechanical whirring] 351 00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:31,535 Whoa. 352 00:12:33,127 --> 00:12:34,867 What? - That was cool. 353 00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:38,041 It's some kind of symbionic metamorphosis device. 354 00:12:38,174 --> 00:12:40,711 This can mean the visitors want to communicate with us. 355 00:12:40,843 --> 00:12:42,458 Oh, I see. 356 00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:44,711 Now you're gonna join in on the little joke, huh? 357 00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:47,714 It's no joke, children. This is big. 358 00:12:47,850 --> 00:12:49,590 Please, Chef, if I don't get out of school 359 00:12:49,727 --> 00:12:51,183 and get my brother back from the aliens, 360 00:12:51,312 --> 00:12:52,768 my parents are gonna disown me. 361 00:12:52,897 --> 00:12:54,762 Uh, hold on, now. Hold on, now. 362 00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:56,639 You got to help the children. 363 00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:58,983 Hey, you guys sure are going a long way 364 00:12:59,112 --> 00:13:00,773 to try and scare me. 365 00:13:00,905 --> 00:13:02,361 I want my Salisbury steak! 366 00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:04,446 Fire drill, fire drill. 367 00:13:04,575 --> 00:13:05,985 Everybody out. 368 00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:07,859 Okay, children, this is your chance. 369 00:13:07,996 --> 00:13:09,702 Killer. Thanks, Chef. 370 00:13:09,831 --> 00:13:10,911 [alarm blaring] 371 00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:12,576 Man, oh, man. 372 00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:14,870 First contact with the alien visitors. 373 00:13:15,003 --> 00:13:16,493 I've got to get myself ready. 374 00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:18,335 all: J‘ We got out ofschooli 375 00:13:18,464 --> 00:13:20,125 J‘ No more school today J‘ 376 00:13:20,258 --> 00:13:21,623 J‘ We got out of school J‘ 377 00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:23,124 [farts violently] Oh, you guys! 378 00:13:23,261 --> 00:13:24,842 My ass, seriously! 379 00:13:24,971 --> 00:13:26,836 Okay, Cartman, you can stop farting fire now. 380 00:13:26,973 --> 00:13:29,134 I would if! could, you son of a bitch. 381 00:13:29,267 --> 00:13:31,303 Okay, so how do we get my little brother back? 382 00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:34,303 Hey, would you stop going on about your little brother? 383 00:13:34,439 --> 00:13:36,054 I know it was just a dream. 384 00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:37,771 I know I didn't have an anal probe. 385 00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:40,312 And I know that I'm not under alien control. 386 00:13:40,445 --> 00:13:41,480 [radio static] 387 00:13:41,612 --> 00:13:43,318 J‘ I love to singa J‘ 388 00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:44,733 J‘About the moona and the juna and the springa J‘ 389 00:13:44,866 --> 00:13:46,356 J‘ I love to singa J‘ 390 00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:49,199 I About a sky of blue or tea for two J‘ 391 00:13:49,329 --> 00:13:50,318 [radio static] 392 00:13:52,373 --> 00:13:53,704 What the hell was that? 393 00:13:53,833 --> 00:13:54,948 He is under alien control. 394 00:13:55,084 --> 00:13:56,244 That thing in his butt 395 00:13:56,377 --> 00:13:57,457 is linked up to the visitors. 396 00:13:57,587 --> 00:13:58,997 Oh, son of a bitch. 397 00:14:03,968 --> 00:14:05,208 You guys shut up. 398 00:14:05,345 --> 00:14:07,176 I'm not under alien control. 399 00:14:07,305 --> 00:14:09,091 Hey, if you visitors can hear me... 400 00:14:09,223 --> 00:14:10,508 Hey. - Bring me back 401 00:14:10,641 --> 00:14:11,881 my little brother, God damn it! 402 00:14:12,018 --> 00:14:14,509 Ow, that hurts, you butt Iicker! 403 00:14:14,645 --> 00:14:15,885 Kyle, look, it's them. 404 00:14:16,022 --> 00:14:18,229 Give me back my brother! 405 00:14:18,358 --> 00:14:20,269 [dramatic music] 406 00:14:20,401 --> 00:14:22,483 [muffled groan] 407 00:14:22,612 --> 00:14:25,069 Oh, my God, they killed Kenny! 408 00:14:25,198 --> 00:14:26,529 You bastards! 409 00:14:26,657 --> 00:14:28,113 Come back here! 410 00:14:28,242 --> 00:14:29,698 Come back! 411 00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:31,943 Damn it! We were so close. 412 00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:34,071 Hey, look, I think Kenny's okay. 413 00:14:34,207 --> 00:14:35,367 [mumbling] 414 00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:36,455 [cows mooing] 415 00:14:36,584 --> 00:14:37,869 Oh. 416 00:14:39,629 --> 00:14:40,789 [mumbling] 417 00:14:40,922 --> 00:14:42,162 [siren wailing] 418 00:14:42,298 --> 00:14:45,506 [solemn music] 419 00:14:45,635 --> 00:14:47,250 Wow, poor Kenny. 420 00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:48,297 Now do you believe us, Cartman? 421 00:14:48,429 --> 00:14:49,669 No. 422 00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:50,795 Cartman, they killed Kenny. 423 00:14:50,932 --> 00:14:52,092 He's not dead. 424 00:14:52,225 --> 00:14:54,181 Dude, Kenny is dead. 425 00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:55,800 See? 426 00:14:55,937 --> 00:14:57,017 Shut up, you guys. 427 00:14:57,146 --> 00:14:58,852 He's dead, Cartman. 428 00:14:58,981 --> 00:15:01,814 God damn it, I didn't have an anal probe! 429 00:15:01,943 --> 00:15:03,808 Screw you guys. I'm going home. 430 00:15:03,945 --> 00:15:06,106 Go on and go home, you fat chicken. 431 00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:07,228 Dildo! 432 00:15:08,491 --> 00:15:10,152 You're all I have left, Stan. 433 00:15:10,284 --> 00:15:11,865 Sorry, dude, I gotta go meet Wendy Testaburger. 434 00:15:11,994 --> 00:15:14,360 You can't. Poor Ike must be so scared. 435 00:15:14,497 --> 00:15:15,577 Up there all alone. 436 00:15:15,706 --> 00:15:16,786 You gotta help me dude. 437 00:15:16,916 --> 00:15:18,201 Dude, like Chef says, 438 00:15:18,334 --> 00:15:19,323 I gotta get a piece of loving 439 00:15:19,460 --> 00:15:20,950 while the getting's hot. 440 00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:22,793 Rats. 441 00:15:22,922 --> 00:15:24,662 [bright music] 442 00:15:24,799 --> 00:15:25,959 Hello, Eric. 443 00:15:26,092 --> 00:15:27,172 Hi, Morn. 444 00:15:27,301 --> 00:15:28,416 How are you doing? 445 00:15:28,553 --> 00:15:30,384 Well, I'm pissed off. 446 00:15:30,513 --> 00:15:34,256 Here, I made you powdered donut pancake surprise. 447 00:15:34,392 --> 00:15:36,053 I don't want powdered donut pancake surprise. 448 00:15:36,185 --> 00:15:37,925 All the kids in school call me fat. 449 00:15:38,062 --> 00:15:40,144 You're not fat, you're big boned. 450 00:15:40,273 --> 00:15:41,809 That's what I said. 451 00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:44,102 You can have an eensy-weensy bit, can't you? 452 00:15:44,235 --> 00:15:45,441 No. 453 00:15:45,570 --> 00:15:47,185 Just a weensy-eensy woo-woo? 454 00:15:47,321 --> 00:15:49,061 No, leave me alone, Mom. 455 00:15:49,198 --> 00:15:51,689 How about a nice chocolate chicken pot pie then? 456 00:15:51,826 --> 00:15:54,989 But...wel|, that sounds pretty good. 457 00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:56,361 Uh, Mom? 458 00:15:56,497 --> 00:15:57,828 Yes, hon? 459 00:15:57,957 --> 00:15:59,322 If anybody calls or comes over, 460 00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:01,245 I'm not here, okay? 461 00:16:01,377 --> 00:16:02,662 Sure, hon. 462 00:16:02,795 --> 00:16:04,410 You want some Cheesy Poofs too? 463 00:16:04,547 --> 00:16:06,003 Yeah, I want Cheesy Poofs. 464 00:16:09,177 --> 00:16:11,133 Well, looks like she's not gonna show up, Stan. 465 00:16:11,262 --> 00:16:12,627 Let's go look for the visitors now. 466 00:16:12,763 --> 00:16:13,969 But her note said she'd be here. 467 00:16:14,098 --> 00:16:15,588 Hi, Stan. 468 00:16:15,725 --> 00:16:17,010 [vomits] - Ew. 469 00:16:17,143 --> 00:16:18,098 You can't talk to Stan, Wendy. 470 00:16:18,227 --> 00:16:19,091 He throws up when you do. 471 00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:20,593 But why, Stan? 472 00:16:20,730 --> 00:16:22,391 [vomits] - Ew. 473 00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:23,888 Look, could you guys just get down to business 474 00:16:24,025 --> 00:16:24,889 so we can find my little brother? 475 00:16:25,026 --> 00:16:26,436 Huh? 476 00:16:26,569 --> 00:16:28,025 Just make sweet love down by the fire. 477 00:16:28,154 --> 00:16:29,815 What happened to your little brother? 478 00:16:29,947 --> 00:16:31,812 As the reports of UFO sightings increase, 479 00:16:31,949 --> 00:16:34,065 more mysterious crop circle patterns are appearing 480 00:16:34,202 --> 00:16:36,033 in fields all around South Park. 481 00:16:36,162 --> 00:16:38,027 These crop circles, when viewed from above, 482 00:16:38,164 --> 00:16:40,576 form strange patterns. 483 00:16:40,708 --> 00:16:43,950 Hey, that kind of looks Iike...Tom Selleck. 484 00:16:44,086 --> 00:16:45,667 Could it be that aliens are trying to 485 00:16:45,796 --> 00:16:47,787 make contact with us, here on Earth? 486 00:16:49,258 --> 00:16:50,714 [meows] 487 00:16:52,094 --> 00:16:54,460 No, kitty, this is my pot pie. 488 00:16:54,597 --> 00:16:56,713 [meows] No, kitty, that's a bad kitty! 489 00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:59,215 [meows] No, kitty, this is my pot pie! 490 00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:02,890 [hisses] Mom, kitty's being a dildo. 491 00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:05,980 Well, then I know a certain kitty kitty 492 00:17:06,108 --> 00:17:08,565 who's sleeping with Mommy tonight. 493 00:17:08,694 --> 00:17:10,776 What? 494 00:17:10,905 --> 00:17:12,395 And now I have to go home without him, 495 00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:14,363 and my parents are gonna have me killed. 496 00:17:14,492 --> 00:17:16,483 Well, why didn't you go get the fat kid? 497 00:17:16,619 --> 00:17:18,530 Why? - Well... 498 00:17:18,663 --> 00:17:21,450 if the fat kid has something implanted in his ass, 499 00:17:21,582 --> 00:17:22,947 maybe the visitors are using him 500 00:17:23,084 --> 00:17:24,449 as part of their plan. 501 00:17:24,585 --> 00:17:26,291 You should use the fat kid as bait 502 00:17:26,420 --> 00:17:27,626 to bring them back. 503 00:17:27,755 --> 00:17:29,291 Hey, you're right, Wendy. 504 00:17:29,423 --> 00:17:31,709 Come on, Stan, we have to go get Cartman. 505 00:17:31,842 --> 00:17:32,706 Come on, Stan. - [vomits] 506 00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:34,299 Ew. 507 00:17:34,428 --> 00:17:35,588 Hey, wait. 508 00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:37,712 When do I get to make sweet love? 509 00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:42,391 [meows] 510 00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:44,977 No, kitty, you can't have any. 511 00:17:45,106 --> 00:17:46,391 [meows] 512 00:17:46,524 --> 00:17:48,355 No, kitty, this is my pot pie! 513 00:17:48,484 --> 00:17:49,815 [farts violently] Bad kitty! 514 00:17:49,944 --> 00:17:51,434 Oh. Excuse me, kitty. 515 00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:53,186 [glass shatters] 516 00:17:53,322 --> 00:17:54,778 Eric, look who's here. 517 00:17:54,907 --> 00:17:56,568 Dude, weak, Mom. 518 00:17:56,701 --> 00:17:57,907 Come on, Eric, we're gonna go play at the bus stop. 519 00:17:58,035 --> 00:17:59,491 I can't. My mom says-- 520 00:17:59,620 --> 00:18:00,905 That's okay, Eric. 521 00:18:01,038 --> 00:18:02,278 I think you need to spend time 522 00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:03,996 with your little friends. 523 00:18:04,125 --> 00:18:05,615 But Mom, I don't want to spend time with my... 524 00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:07,287 Don't be difficult, Eric. 525 00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:10,207 Now, you go out and play in the fun snow. 526 00:18:10,339 --> 00:18:11,419 God damn it. 527 00:18:11,549 --> 00:18:12,538 [meows] 528 00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:16,129 You guys, I have to get home. 529 00:18:16,262 --> 00:18:17,843 Don't be such a fraidy cat, Cartman. 530 00:18:17,972 --> 00:18:19,382 This rope will make sure 531 00:18:19,515 --> 00:18:21,801 they can't take you on board again. 532 00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:23,549 Oh, man, this sucks. 533 00:18:23,686 --> 00:18:25,222 How come the visitors aren't coming for him? 534 00:18:25,354 --> 00:18:26,639 I think we have to signal them somehow. 535 00:18:26,772 --> 00:18:28,763 [farts violently] Ow! 536 00:18:28,899 --> 00:18:31,060 Hey, he's like Rudolph. 537 00:18:31,193 --> 00:18:33,400 Yeah, all you have to do is fart some more, Cartman, 538 00:18:33,529 --> 00:18:35,360 and the visitors are sure to come. 539 00:18:35,489 --> 00:18:37,025 Really? 540 00:18:37,158 --> 00:18:39,524 Uh, I don't think I have to fart anymore tonight. 541 00:18:39,660 --> 00:18:40,695 Sure you do. 542 00:18:40,828 --> 00:18:41,908 Come on, Cartman, fart. 543 00:18:42,038 --> 00:18:43,448 I don't wanna. 544 00:18:43,581 --> 00:18:44,866 He can't hold it in forever. 545 00:18:44,999 --> 00:18:46,330 Fart, damn you! 546 00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:48,290 Okay, that does it. 547 00:18:48,419 --> 00:18:49,625 Now, listen, 548 00:18:49,754 --> 00:18:51,210 why is it that everything today 549 00:18:51,339 --> 00:18:53,045 has involved things either going in 550 00:18:53,174 --> 00:18:55,506 or coming out of my ass? 551 00:18:55,635 --> 00:18:56,841 [farts violently] I'm sick of it. 552 00:18:56,969 --> 00:18:58,425 It's completely immature. 553 00:18:58,554 --> 00:19:00,465 Hey, it's happening again. 554 00:19:00,598 --> 00:19:02,805 [mechanical whirring] 555 00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:04,764 Whoa, look at that. 556 00:19:04,894 --> 00:19:06,100 Now do you believe us, Cartman? 557 00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:07,764 You guys can't scare me. 558 00:19:07,897 --> 00:19:09,433 I know you're making it all up. 559 00:19:09,565 --> 00:19:11,977 Cartman, there's an 80-foot satellite dish 560 00:19:12,109 --> 00:19:13,724 sticking out of your ass. 561 00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:16,102 Sure, you guys. Whatever. 562 00:19:16,238 --> 00:19:17,819 [satellite pinging] 563 00:19:17,948 --> 00:19:19,484 Oh, boy, 564 00:19:19,617 --> 00:19:21,858 the aliens are going to make first contact. 565 00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:23,985 Hey, down here! 566 00:19:24,121 --> 00:19:27,158 We are ready for your wisdom! 567 00:19:27,291 --> 00:19:29,122 And you only got 20 minutes 568 00:19:29,251 --> 00:19:31,913 before "Sanford and Son" is on. 569 00:19:32,046 --> 00:19:34,412 You guys, I am seriously 570 00:19:34,548 --> 00:19:36,664 getting pissed off right now! 571 00:19:36,801 --> 00:19:39,668 I know there's no such thing as aliens! 572 00:19:41,722 --> 00:19:44,134 Oh, God damn it! 573 00:19:44,266 --> 00:19:46,052 What the--? 574 00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:49,052 I tell you, there's crazy stuff going on in this town. 575 00:19:49,188 --> 00:19:52,100 You can say that again, Mr. Garrison. 576 00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:54,940 Come down here, you stinking aliens. 577 00:19:55,069 --> 00:19:56,559 [eerie music] 578 00:19:56,696 --> 00:19:57,560 Uh, uh... 579 00:19:57,697 --> 00:19:59,062 Go on, Kyle, 580 00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:00,278 ask them for your little brother back. 581 00:20:00,408 --> 00:20:01,818 V-visitors, 582 00:20:01,951 --> 00:20:03,487 this morning you took my brother, Ike. 583 00:20:03,619 --> 00:20:04,984 He's the little freckled kid 584 00:20:05,121 --> 00:20:06,577 that looks like a football. 585 00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:08,367 At first I was happy you took him away. 586 00:20:08,499 --> 00:20:09,784 But I've learned something today. 587 00:20:09,917 --> 00:20:11,327 That having a little brother 588 00:20:11,460 --> 00:20:12,916 is a pretty special thing. 589 00:20:13,045 --> 00:20:14,706 Yeah. - Aw, heck, Mr. Visitors, 590 00:20:14,839 --> 00:20:16,670 I'm just a kid all alone in this crazy world. 591 00:20:16,799 --> 00:20:18,130 But if you can find it in your hearts 592 00:20:18,259 --> 00:20:19,544 or whatever you have 593 00:20:19,677 --> 00:20:21,213 to give my brother back to me, 594 00:20:21,345 --> 00:20:23,381 it sure would make my life brighter again. 595 00:20:23,514 --> 00:20:25,095 That was beautiful, dude. 596 00:20:25,224 --> 00:20:26,134 Did it work? 597 00:20:26,267 --> 00:20:27,598 Nope, they're leaving. 598 00:20:27,727 --> 00:20:29,513 Hey, you scrawny assed [bleep]! 599 00:20:29,645 --> 00:20:31,351 What the [bleep] is wrong with you? 600 00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:32,936 You must be some kind of [bleep] 601 00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:34,646 to be able to ignore a crying child! 602 00:20:34,775 --> 00:20:36,060 Whoa, dude. 603 00:20:36,193 --> 00:20:37,148 You know what you [bleep] like? 604 00:20:37,278 --> 00:20:39,394 You like to [bleep]... 605 00:20:39,530 --> 00:20:41,987 [bleeps continue] 606 00:20:42,116 --> 00:20:44,653 Hey, Wendy, what's a [bleep]? 607 00:20:46,120 --> 00:20:47,576 [babbles] 608 00:20:47,705 --> 00:20:49,912 Ike, jump down, now! 609 00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,907 For the love of God, Ike, jump! 610 00:20:53,043 --> 00:20:54,499 Don't hurt me. 611 00:20:54,628 --> 00:20:57,620 [cows mooing] 612 00:21:02,303 --> 00:21:03,509 Moo. 613 00:21:10,853 --> 00:21:12,389 Come on, Ike. 614 00:21:12,521 --> 00:21:14,512 I promise I'll be nice to you from now on. 615 00:21:14,648 --> 00:21:15,933 Don't kick the baby. 616 00:21:22,031 --> 00:21:23,737 What the hell are they talking about? 617 00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:33,280 Ike! 618 00:21:38,839 --> 00:21:42,627 Ike, do your impersonation of David Caruso's career! 619 00:21:42,760 --> 00:21:44,125 It's my turn. 620 00:21:56,649 --> 00:21:59,140 You guys, get me down from here! 621 00:21:59,276 --> 00:22:01,733 [farts violently] Help! 622 00:22:01,862 --> 00:22:02,977 Help! 623 00:22:03,113 --> 00:22:04,978 Sons a bitches! 624 00:22:05,115 --> 00:22:07,697 Dildo! 625 00:22:07,827 --> 00:22:10,034 Phew, I'm sure glad that's over with. 626 00:22:10,162 --> 00:22:12,198 Yeah, boy, am I glad to see you, Ike. 627 00:22:12,331 --> 00:22:14,538 [babbles] Fly in the sky. 628 00:22:14,667 --> 00:22:16,077 Wait. 629 00:22:16,210 --> 00:22:17,950 Where are you going, alien visitors? 630 00:22:18,087 --> 00:22:19,577 Come back. 631 00:22:19,713 --> 00:22:21,123 Well, Chef, where's this amazing thing 632 00:22:21,257 --> 00:22:22,667 you were gonna show us? 633 00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:24,290 Well, it's in the bedroom, ladies. 634 00:22:24,426 --> 00:22:25,290 Come on in. 635 00:22:25,427 --> 00:22:26,792 Come on, Ike, 636 00:22:26,929 --> 00:22:28,214 we can make it just in time for dinner. 637 00:22:28,347 --> 00:22:29,211 Thanks for your help, Wendy. 638 00:22:29,348 --> 00:22:30,428 Whatever, dude. 639 00:22:30,558 --> 00:22:31,923 Hey, I didn't throw up. 640 00:22:32,059 --> 00:22:32,923 Cool. 641 00:22:33,060 --> 00:22:36,097 [romantic music] 642 00:22:36,230 --> 00:22:40,018 J‘J‘ 643 00:22:40,150 --> 00:22:42,015 [vomits] - Ew. 644 00:22:42,152 --> 00:22:44,359 Sorry. - Hey, look, a French fry. 645 00:22:44,488 --> 00:22:46,444 Cool. - And what is that? 646 00:22:46,574 --> 00:22:47,689 I think it's part of a Cheesy Poof. 647 00:22:47,825 --> 00:22:49,531 Hey, what's that? 648 00:22:49,660 --> 00:22:51,571 J‘ I'm gonna make love J‘ - That's a hamburger. 649 00:22:51,704 --> 00:22:52,819 That's from like two days ago. - J‘ To you woman J‘ 650 00:22:52,955 --> 00:22:54,320 Well, hey, what about that? 651 00:22:54,456 --> 00:22:55,445 I don't know what the hell that is. 652 00:22:59,587 --> 00:23:01,077 Gee, the bus will be here any minute. 653 00:23:01,213 --> 00:23:02,669 And Cartman still isn't around. 654 00:23:02,798 --> 00:23:04,504 Yeah, we're running out of friends. 655 00:23:04,633 --> 00:23:05,873 I wonder what that thing was 656 00:23:06,010 --> 00:23:07,375 that the visitors gave the cows? 657 00:23:07,511 --> 00:23:10,503 [mooing] 658 00:23:10,639 --> 00:23:13,096 Ha-ha, cows, I got you cornered. 659 00:23:13,225 --> 00:23:15,466 Let's see you get away now. 660 00:23:15,603 --> 00:23:16,888 [radio static] 661 00:23:17,021 --> 00:23:18,727 J‘ I love to singa J‘ 662 00:23:18,856 --> 00:23:20,642 J‘About the moona and the juna and the springa J‘ 663 00:23:20,774 --> 00:23:22,389 J‘ I love to singa J‘ 664 00:23:22,526 --> 00:23:24,767 I About a sky of blue or tea for two J‘ 665 00:23:24,904 --> 00:23:26,019 [spits] 666 00:23:26,155 --> 00:23:27,235 Oh, hey, Cartman. 667 00:23:27,364 --> 00:23:28,604 Wow, Cartman. 668 00:23:28,741 --> 00:23:29,901 The visitors dropped you off 669 00:23:30,034 --> 00:23:30,898 just in time to go to school. 670 00:23:31,035 --> 00:23:32,400 Oh, man, 671 00:23:32,536 --> 00:23:33,992 I had this crazy nightmare last night. 672 00:23:34,121 --> 00:23:35,531 Really? What about? 673 00:23:35,664 --> 00:23:37,905 Well, I was standing out in a field 674 00:23:38,042 --> 00:23:40,374 and I had this huge satellite dish 675 00:23:40,502 --> 00:23:42,117 sticking out of my butt. 676 00:23:42,254 --> 00:23:44,461 And then there was hundreds of cows and aliens 677 00:23:44,590 --> 00:23:46,455 and then I went up on the ship 678 00:23:46,592 --> 00:23:48,378 and Scott Baio gave me pink eye. 679 00:23:48,510 --> 00:23:49,465 That wasn't a dream, Cartman. 680 00:23:49,595 --> 00:23:50,584 That really happened. 681 00:23:50,721 --> 00:23:51,927 Oh, right. 682 00:23:52,056 --> 00:23:53,421 Why don't I have pink eye then? 683 00:23:53,557 --> 00:23:55,263 Cartman, you do have pink eye. 684 00:23:55,392 --> 00:23:57,633 Oh, son of a bitch. 46871

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