Original subtitles

(singing)

(gargles)

(song)

(trolley)

(singing)

I am coming!

I am coming!

(train whistles)

(applause)

- It's great to stand on a stage. - It's amazing.

- But it's not like the old days. - How was it back then?

You had to fight a lot more. You had to rely on yourself.

Were there no soufflés? Hey.

Do you think, Alstrp, Dagmar Hansen and the others -

- had amplifiers and microphones?

When they spoke and sang, them up on the gallery...

... couldn't hear a damn.

- Everything has changed so much. - Yes.

Development has gone in the wrong direction.

Actors are no longer so evil to each other as they used to be.

When you were a comedian, I was about to laugh at you.

Was it around your 25th anniversary?

I heard the report on my crystal device.

That is lovely hair you have. Too bad it sits between all the others.

Is that your nose or do you just eat bananas?

The theater is a wonderful thing!

Can you imagine hearing the atmosphere -

- in the Athlete Park's international match between Denmark and Sweden?

- Yes, I would like that well. - Do you have a box of matches?

Yes, purely by accident.

Pick up a match.

We iron them.

- What should I do with it? - Turn it on.

Turn it off. Down in the box. Up to the ear.

- Can you hear anything? - No.

Then it's halftime.

a rose sprang out and a starling trilled

while the sun rose and my mother gave birth to me

I smiled imploringly because my mouth was so small

it was first when I looked at the calendar I screamed

I got so mad when I saw I was born on a Sunday

I hate that day, it's quiet and long

a sunday child is so sweet and so innocent and easy

that it may never suit my tempeament

I love to sit in front of my TV

Am I allowed to disturb?

After all, I can't allow myself to disturb, because who am I?

But when I'm here...

Can you imagine experiencing the atmosphere, -

- the set, from an international match between Denmark and Sweden?

- Yes, I would like that well. - Do you have a box of matches?

Take a match, light it, blow it, and put it in the box.

- Can you hear anything? - Yes.

- Try yourself. Can you hear anything? - No.

Then it's halftime.

I love to sit in front of my TV

with a small cerut and a giant drink

I made it a point to only look at the screen

when they air a very good program

so I let them sit with their eyes closed for five years

because I take the chance but it is too soft

I hope they soon make the crap in colours

then one have an excuse to see red

I love my country, I like to live here

because I think it's clean and nice and beautiful

I care about the mermaid and the beer and the lunch

and the king and Vigeslev Road viaduct

but why the hell increases the tax a ten per second

and why the hell is there VAT on a sausage with bread

and why the hell can you buy a house other places

for what you have to give for half a liter of sweet

why the hell is stamps and telephone raising in price

when never the real number came

why the hell the state railway tariffs raise all the way

so it almost cost more to Bagsvaed than Rome

why the hell does a farmer must make several millions

when he take a thousand for a small piece of pork

when shrimp in Tivoli cost a ploughman

what does it help if you become a millionaire

Thank you, folks.

I would like to tell you an Authentic story.

Jens Otto, Haekkerup and Grunbaum were up and flying.

Over East Germany, Jens Otto says: "We throw a 1000-mark note out, -

- then we can please one down there."

Then Haekkerup said: "Split it in two, then we can please two down there."

Grunbaum said: "Split it into ten, then we can please ten down there."

Then the pilot turned and said: Better idea;

"If we throw the three gentlemen away, you could please four and a half million."

(applause)

Well, but otherwise the country lies...

Go over and take care of your dumpling lamp-huggery.

Can't you just give me two minutes with my fans?

I just have to ask you something.

- Come. - What's the matter?

Can you imagine experiencing the atmosphere, the rush and the breeze -

- during a football match between Denmark and Sweden?

Yes, I would like that well.

- Do you have any matches? - Yes.

- Then take a match out. - What should I do with it?

Light it, and blow it out again, and then down in the box.

So should it go in the box again? Well, well, well?

- So what? - Take it to your ear and listen.

- Can you hear anything? - Yes. Can you?

Yes.

Here is the story of a king in a country.

King Freddy.

And his children, who were princesses.

You automatically became that when you were born back then.

In those circles.

Yes, these were distinguished circles.

(sound effects)

But it is expensive to stay in.

What does it help that you like music...

... when the girls are so expensive to have going?

But he was an optimist right to the end.

they wanted an idyllic in the very fine, beautiful castle

the guard armed up and the sweet little princesses beckoned

while King Feddy played a song on the piano

it said swallowedibabediab

and then Mommy came in, "we have to think a little about the future

since it's a bit difficult with the sons, let's start

we have to find three men to our girls."

Feddy talked about putting an ad in

but maybe it will be enough with a rumour

that with the rumour worked well, all princes that were available

got 'watch and hear' sent up to their castle

the three small girls was astounded to see the princes

and it also rumoured to a single king

he had a mom whom kept him on a leash

so it fell to the youngest of the youths

so the youngest daughter got up quite cheaply

then there were the older ones left

King Feddy said, "Go out and bake a cake."

and then the eldest daughter came to littlemom and daddy

just as coincidentally with a thing that were French

she said "look at him, I see it's a namnam

he promised to do everything in Danish"

"okay" said the king and went away into the salon

He's not exactly five out of fancy state

well but bad with his rank but what about his bank?

I'm afraid it's going to be hell of a lot expensive

then they set to work on the very fine, beautiful castle

five with the cash box down and look at the bottom

I wonder if they were enough for rice pudding, that was just enough, but then they came

Yes, you guessed right, the third girl

with a man from the third kingdom, uha

a new shock for the poor daddy

but then his last daughter said

"mine pays for himself."

Goodbye, girls! Goodbye!

Now we pass the Three Crowns.

Three crowns? Then we'd better take a look at the bill.

- We pay separately. - Yes, we just have to take a look at it.

- Let's split it into two parts. - No, I've only had a schnapps.

- But you got two with the smoked eel. - Because your husband can't eat up.

So, so, girls. Father is ready with the typewriter.

Now we just have to put it all together and calculate it.

- Then we have to get tickets. - And chocolate and licorice candy.

- We paid for the licorice candy. - Hold on. Andersen fixes it.

I divide us into different categories and call us A, B, C and D.

Then I will be D.

No make a scene, Hekla.

First there are the tickets. It is 64 crowns.

It must be divided by four. That's 16 for each.

Expensive, just because Gustav wanted to get over the chlorophyll boat.

It must be a savings tree.

If it has to be like that, I will pay the difference.

I also think it was funny to try the hypochondriac boat.

It's more fun if Gustav pays the difference.

He never said that, just said it was fun to try it.

Yes, but he also said he would pay the difference.

DKK 16 each. And shut up with that homophile boat.

12 pieces of bread-snacks.

Yes, that's three for each. 42.60 must be shared.

Andersen, you have eaten my smoked eel.

Only because you couldn't eat it yourself.

It has nothing to do with it. You have received four pieces.

Yeah, yeah, so be it. That's 3.65 each.

An egg dish cannot cost the same as a piece of salmon.

Emma, you didn't get any egg food.

I just said there must be a difference.

Did you get mushrooms on the liver paste? I only got sour.

It must save the smoked eel.

Take the map. Then it's easier.

What did you get, Gustav?

One piece with salmon and one with roast pork.

And one with herring.

- The salmon is 7.50. - I absolutely will not give that!

- I don't want to either. - Did you get salmon?

No, no, no.

Yes.

We let the salmon rest.

Roast beef: 2.85.

They can't sell that for that money.

It's right here on the note, bitch.

- I had roast pork. - You chooses the cheap.

But remember the eel.

- We let the fish rest. - It rests!

- Who got schnapps? - Who got schnapps, Andersen?

I did that.

You also got schnapps, Gustav. And you, Hekla.

Eight large. There are three for me, three for Gustav and two for Hekla.

No, no, no!

I only had one snaps.

- Then you must have got four. - I haven't got any.

Four? Do you think I drink? You are the one who got four.

- Then we let the schnapps rest. - It rests.

- Who got cognac? - Zero cognac. I got Underberg.

Do you expect the two of us to pay the whole thing?

I just try to make it as justified as possible.

You got liquoir, Hekla.

Yes, but everyone liked it because I thought it was bad.

- Nah, Hekla. I didn't taste it. - No, but you smelled it.

- We let the liqueur rest. - It rests.

We divide it evenly by three. That's 1.15 each.

How can it be 1.15 each when it costs three crowns?

Because I've added up.

15 percent? Have you also done it on all the other ones?

You block us.

- Does Frederik have to pay the whole thing? - No, because he never forgets that.

- How much is the bill? - About 163.

162.85 with the tickets.

(talking to each other)

- You can get 60 from me. - That's something- The Swedish crown is mine.

No, it's not. Gustav stands there.

Look, Andersen. There is Gustav.

It's not that Gustav, then.

That is the Finnish king. I know him.

Then he can pay the bill.

Doesn't he play amazing?

That sound, that volume. That fingering.

Gosh!

He plays with a double tone rest that bridge of pedal.

I just think you should know.

That is my son. Can't you see we look alike?

som, then they went 25 years before you had long curly hair

velvet shoe with a chubby little belly

son, I remember everything as if it's yesterday

you were sitting on your knees under the apple tree

you were a real Sonny boy

the tones sounded 'when you happily crawled'

full of music Sonny-boy

I was proud, son, you were so beautiful

and now you held, son, your little violin

against the chin

Your head looked like a punctured note

right on a spot Sonny-boy

then you came to school, you kid, but your head had a defect

only music in the light bulb letter home you brought from the teacher

that you sat and played naughty

it gave me a crack, I wonder if it was then cured, kid

when you became big, Sonny-boy

in the lessons you lazied, on the school wall you wrote

real x-rated words, Sonny-boy

you cheated on the exam and stole a trumphet

you beat up the lady you casually saw

you stole it

you drank my beers, beat people down with clubs

how naughty you were, Sonny-boy

time went on Sonny-boy

mostly at restaurant, Sonny-boy

where were you the night you turned eighteen

on the big can, Sonny-boy

lazying it about without owning a cent

did you buy a wagon, Sonny-boy

then out to drive and seduce

the girls in the forest, Sonny-boy

I know it well, and you smoked the cigar

You looked beautiful, so beautiful that you made a child

in my patent leather shoes as you had stolen

because your own was not good enough

you're a clown, Sonny-boy

you stupid pig, Sonny-boy

think you're mine, Sonny-boy

bad promille, bad you play

but not at a gallop, Sonny-boy

the piano and the lamp they went on the stomp

thank you, Sonny-boy

yesterday the bailiff collected the clatoll and the drawers

what will be the next, Sonny-boy

I'll tell you that, he'll get your dad

it's the last your poor mom has

but anyway

cheers and good luck

blow me a bit

thanks, Sonny-boy

That VAT is driving me crazy.

You become so shrillly insane. Good day.

Miss. Jensen.

Now we have got a new calendar. Monday, Tuesday, VAT day...

Wake up at night. On with the VAT. What should it be?

A bottle of ketchup, three boxes of matches and a piece of smoked cheese.

The one with the filter.

The others will hold the lid this summer to calculate new prices, -

- but the two of us can easily manage that.

Ketchp is 4.50 plus ten percent VAT. That's 4.95.

Matches are 45 cents. Ten percent of that is 4.5 cents.

4.5 cents? One goes crazy.

Come here, Miss. Jensen.

What do we do now?

- With the half cent. - How should I know that?

- Straight or not straight? - I just need matches.

Not today. Equal or not equal?

- Equal. - Good, then it will be four cents.

- There what? - Must be added.

After all, VAT is just oms with an "m" in front, which means "more."

I don't want any more.

They get three boxes of 15 cents. A VAT of 12.5 percent has been added to them, -

- before I add my profit of three cents. Three from 15 is 12.

12.5 percent of 12 is... It drives you crazy.

- I just have to... - You just have to, and you just have to.

We have forgotten the discount of three cents.

Ten percent of three cents is three tenths of a cent.

That's a big minus for me on top of the minus of a half percent.

Didn't we learn in school that two minusses makes plus?

Yes. Then two plusses must also give minus.

It will be at least half a percent, at least three-tenths cents and at least cheese.

That makes 9.99 plus VAT plus my profit and your loss.

That is a total of DKK 11.01 multiplied by 12.5 percent in turnover.

The whole thing will be 136 crowns and 54 cents.

Like that, Ms. Jensen.

Are you sure you also want the cheese?

- These are some expensive matches. - That is the purpose of VAT.

Two cartons of paper napkins and 60 rolls of the coloured.

- They sign off right here. - Should I sign off again?

Good day.

What is this?

You have taxed it well.

- I don't know anything about that. - Well, you don't?

Am I to be cheated of 12.5 percent because Ms Jensen buys 60 rolls?

I can't use 60 rolls at all.

Don't be sad. It's a tax scam. I can deduct what you pay too much.

Then you get social compensation for the paper at the other end.

- Receipt or money. - Don't you get, it's Ms Jensen who has bought them.

You must pay her compensation for the VAT you took too much.

If you can't figure it out yourself, you have to go to the Twelve-and-a-half-ministry.

There are computers for that sort of thing.

On the second day, the IRS searched for full ladies, half ladies and hole ladies.

There is also VAT on striptease.

It must be difficult to find the wholesale section there.

If I were a striptease, I would take my good clothes and go.

It didn't work at all. If I were you, I would wear -

- and buy a cheese with holes. The holes are also subject to VAT.

I wanted to say to the director of the Twelve and a Half Ministry.

"They are a cheese. They can VAT the holes themselves."

- Do you know what you get from the VAT? - Crazy.

There is only a short time until the train leaves. There are 25 minutes left.

I want to go home to Thyregod. Do I make it? There are 24 minutes left.

It probably won't be today or tomorrow. There are 23 minutes left.

It's awful, I can't find the main station. There are 22 minutes left.

I only stroll at the railroad, ouch how it looked

it really could use an endless round of soapy water

and there were queues here and queues there

queues by the cigarettes and queues by the tickets

queues by the newspapers and queues where you pee

but how mad they looked, there's 21 minutes again

I blow on dirt and tax, yes, yes, yes

and oms and VAT on this and that, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes

I thought you had fun day and night

so I looked really silly, there's 19 minutes again

but instead I stood in the middle of Town Square

right in the rush hour like this at five o'clock

I almost suffocated from the smoke and the gas

just by the rush cars, ouch, it was bad

the smell of spring can make me so weak

but this scent of I do not know it is strong

the air that I can't take, I'm going to be weak, I'm going to be weak

so rather the scent I brought from home, rap, rap

it doesn't smell of smoke, but of moss, they are 17 minutes again

wht the hell such a chase, is it like that everyday?

why don't take it a bit slowly?

you saved from a noise and tension and the end and hello

but then they brought an officer and I said "excuse me."

"can you tell me where Stroeget is?"

He glared stupidly and nodded dumbly and said "stroeget is there"

"Is that stroeget I was delighted to see?"

"it might as well be called candy avenue"

the girls wade in flat shoes

while they let themselves be ogled

they walked and wiggled their popo

in short dresses

it's a night with hat and ribbon and vail and dress

decent in length

it is now requires that one blend in like that in the crowd

there is 12 minutes again then mommy here went through New-Harbour

I met Kaj

He gave beer and schnapps in Shanghai

and he said he was smithened with me

So those were the ones I got a little goosebumps on

everything was foggy everywhere

we made it something so fun, we made it

ten minutes to go

then I went with Kaj in a small car from Shanghai

on a small dirt road he rubbed me

how could you dare it, Kaj?

but then I found a little treasure with page hair

and he took me with to his house

Oh, you merciful!

it's seven minutes to go

and it was not to be seen whether they went up or down

Was it boys or girls or what?

with their long, disheveled hair, they looked like ordinary people

as one forgot to cut such a few years

and they were one especially who could fit at my place

like a scarecrow in my backyard, it's six minutes away

I was at the Round Tower, you mild sky

it was so high, so high, that I got dizzy

I dizzied around, around, around...

I collapsed on Merchant Street like a bundle of rags

out on the tile lay Petine

the rods in the weighted, hat is a little crooked

people could stand and laugh

of one who looked like she had a big trip

in five minutes still, I went to Tivoli

they become so happy and so lively

but suddenly I was standing at the edge of the Tivoli lake

and felt a little sad

of longing a rear ran, I couldn't let go at all

it was just as if I was at Tyregod's street corner

If only one were there, two minutes away

Oh, Marinus I want to go home to you. Oh, Marinus I want to go home

there comes a Tuborg wagon with horses

they're a minute away, let's go, man

borrow me a horse, man

a horse that I can ride

for now I will go home to Kirsten and Kresten and the servant and the priest

and the bag and threw Nikolai

and all the others are waiting for me

No!

Statistic says for every 1,000 people, that is, the number that may be in here, -

- there are three murderers, 90 house beaters with some who's with their secretary, -

- 300 tax arrears and 800 parking offenders.

That's one heck of a collection to perform for.

The other day I got to make a diaper in a cart that was parked next to mine.

There were witnesses, so I put a note in the windshield wiper of the other car.

It read: "The people think I write my name and address, -

- but I simply express my deepest regret."

Where is Joergen Graengaard?

Yes, he has a weed-break.

But he's a nice guy.

He is a family man and diligent.

Cheers, Joergen.

Always busy with something. Always in operation.

"The New Theory Book?" He must be up for the driving test.

"He raised the whip to strike.

It squealed down her almost naked body.

Her strawberry-topped breasts..."

But he's a nice guy.

Nice guy and a very nice arranger.

He must arrange a forest tree for the staff. We're looking forward.

Back to traffic. The other day I stood at the tank in Nyrops Street.

Getting it filled... not like that. Suddenly a pedestrian comes in like this.

Push! Push! "Here you go," he said and left.

- "What happened?" I said. - "He has lost his driver's license."

"Why don't you say he has no carriage?"

"Because we get ten crowns every other day to wash it," he said.

When an officer has to note down a female traffic offender, -

- that says: "My name is Antoinette Schafolitsky.

Oehlenschlaegersgade 10, the mezzanine."

Then you can imagine him letting her go.

The other day, together, smart little blonde in a sports car.

Police station 11, room 26.

For some reason I can't find that police station.

Eventually I came to a sign that said "Police Clinic," or something like that.

- The waiting time is terrible. - You get used to that.

So it's not the first time you have to be father... father?

I'm not going to be a grandfather. This is the third time.

Room 19.

Has something happened?

Congratulations. A lovely boy. Eight pound.

Have I got a son? I'm proud as a pope.

I don't think the Pope would be.

Isn't it soon my turn? I came first.

This is a maternity clinic. We have no delivery deadlines.

- When do I have to hold him? - He needs to be shaved first.

It must be here. An officer and a gentleman in stripes are sitting there.

It's probably a horse thief he caught on the straw square.

- Good day. - It's just the private bank.

My name is Juhl. I am looking for room 26.

- They are indeed in good time. - It is then a bit in 11 .

Nah.

We are not that precise here. It won't be until the evening.

I'm busy. I travel in chocolate.

I'm a frogman.

You don't understand one bit of that.

- Can't you put push in it? - Come here and sit down.

They dance beautifully.

It's hard to sit still.

I don't even know if anything will happen.

(talking to each other)

Now it can be enough!

- Good day. - The verdict has been passed.

- How cheap did you get off? - Eight pound.

What? Perhaps the offense was committed in England?

My little luck happened on the Roundpart.

Which part?

Otherwise, I am always overly cautious.

I am happy with the consequences.

And in uniform. Is this the first time you have been in the hole?

It is the third.

It was hell. A habitual criminal in uniform.

Gentlemen. What a noise. Put you in your place.

- How can I help? - Room 26.

A gentleman has already come to that room.

The handsome gentleman in the middle.

Sexual offender.

Are you also waiting for room 26?

Sorry, I'm not quite there.

- What relationship do you have with that lady? - They were themselves about it.

As you ride, so you lie.

They are not that little nasty!

A slight touch and immediately a diaper in the bodywork.

It happens every day.

Such a pig.

What do you imagine?

I'm right there at the crossroads...

The smart little one is almost touching my cooler figure.

By the way, I have never could offord it.

- What does it matter to you if they cost? - I do praise your...

Tell me, do you ever clean the crankcase?

And what about the rubber guns?

Otherwise, you cannot maneuver safely.

- They have a dirty mindset. - He is a specialist.

I am an old mechanic.

If he hadn't fiddled with the spiral leaking from the damper, -

- then it would never have come.

One more word and you will not survive.

Then came the 26th. Congratulations, Juhl.

Lucky wheel? Number 26 has arrived on...

Shouldn't I get a Moroccan cup?

I had a dream, a fantastic dream

easily unimaginable one can now see a night vision

It can be so easy that it won't go away

I went numb in my knees and like cotton wool in my mouth

of the silly nonsense but the heck

when you dream that all that on TV means good viewing

what I saw on the screen it was good

yes, I said good

the pictures and what they said the plot and them they said that

good, everything

such a thing to dream in the box

think everything will be fine, even Flemming Madsen

should one be insane? Is that a bang in my skull?

because even the test picture was good

it therefore began the sentence in a very strange way

they were all gathered except the emperor, he had left

not because he was offended, no it was only beginners luck

he just said "I'm bad" and then he left by himself

but the other Tie, Danstup

Liebekind and all those

Gunna Nu and Miss Lis, all of televeisions Savour's Army

they remained standing on the spot they had been

and then they all sang including those from the redio Council too

now everyone has to have fun, have fun, have fun, everyone enjoy

now everyone must pretend that it was a dream

Hanne Summer took off the artificial hair off

and yelled "now we begin over"

with Adam and Eve in Paradise

it is something for the many, so SilverHigh can play snake

we can easily get apples for reduced price

if we give them the acclaim we gave Simon Spies

Adam and Eve, what an idea

all departments went wild Adam and Eve

now you have to see what you can get out of it

Good day, girls and boys. I heard about Karis and Baktus.

Today I have to hear about the pussy and calories.

Adam and Eve walked in the Garden of Eden

then it was him who had a stomach

but when I bit the apple, he suddenly felt the rush

and then it was Eva they got in the bad house

but you know very well that Adam could never have been a father

if Eva had remembered to not...

Send the solution labeled "bs," Islands Brygge.

- The winner will then be sent a... - Try to guess.

what a dream you could almost be two

to such a dream they are nobody they want two

that one easily dream alone as a bent nail

uh, and such a dream

The sport broadcasts from the Paradise's Garden, where we have to watch the action -

- between Adam 31 and Eva 2216-Vega.

The whistle sounds and the apple is given up. Eve has it, and to Adam throws it.

Eva takes it down with her chest far down and returns

Adam has the apple, still Adam has the apple.

It goes for throw-in. Eva throws. Eva with the parrot.

The whistle sounds. What's the fuss about?

They are both challenged for eating the ball.

what a dream you could almost see two

to such a dream they are nobody that would believe

that one easily dream alone as a bent nail

uha, and such a dream

Good day, Ms. Larsen. It's "The Phone Is Ringing."

Good day, Mr. Leisner.

Can you see me? I can't see you because I don't have far... vision.

First question: Who were the first people on Earth?

- Gorm the old. - There were two, Ms Larsen.

- Fy and Bee. - Ms, it was a gentleman and a lady.

Nina and Frederik, my husband says that.

It was Adam and E...

- What? - Right answer, Ms Larsen.

Second question: Why were they thrown out of the Garden of Paradise?

- I have never been. - Not you. Adam and Eve.

- Don't know. They probably couldn't pay the bill. - Right. You can say that.

- What is the last question? - Third question.

Rightæy answered, Ms Larsen. We will send you a transistor.

TV, television, what I saw on the screen

everything was fine

If it comes out, I'll be admitted for sure

you didn't allow that kind of lies and backbiting to be dreamed

(horn)

(trolley)

(sound effects)

(nonsense language)

(horn)

(horn)

(trolley)

(nonsense language)

everything today is automated and matised

everything will be calculated electronically

peculiarity that makes the brain ache gets solves

that machine in a thousandth of a second

it comes quite automatically by itself

it can quadrat logaitme and tablet

the divide and multiply and

If you want to play a melody, pop in some sheet music

then you get the ouvetuen to Willem Tell

it comes quite automatically by itself

it is very easy to use without legal advice

but my pivate head pain is not worn by a machine

you get married and you get children and you get debt

it comes quite automatically by itself

people they suddenly lost their jobs

they always get the deficit stopped

but one is Per Haekkeup and the job is taken

then it's something else to get a lot of legs

they come quite automatically by themselves

for Danmark's Lucky Per, it's probably a joke

the easy positions give easy money

Perhaps a prime minister's post could give me a bit of daily sustenance

the chair is not a castle in the air

it comes quite automatically by itself

experts think it will happen that Kragh becomes Black Per.

Per cycle bravely towards the final as he tramps the pedal

will he reach it with a broken axel.

it comes quite automatically by itself

everyone says that you have to tell, tell, tell

the children about all things sexual, sexual

What should I say though? what a lecture it will be

we have several young people, a couple of boys and girls

they came quite automatically by themselves

I'm not really overly sexual

but a little good-naturedly also gives lushness

but it will be a long time before I teach my children

it comes quite automatically by itself

as true as men's pants still left a gap

a certain causion can have its place

but they can talk and talk about spirals and birth control

the girl will be pregnant all the same

it comes quite automatically by itself

how sweet it is how adorable it is

I am proud of my husband

It's great that you got it yourself

it's incredible you can

I definitely think of all men

it's only you that are capable of it

smart man, daddy

you must be a bad one

Well...

(spinning)

pick it up now, it's good now

You're not shy, are you?

do you think I? you can't think so

I'll just do it wrongly

it's yours, maybe is a bit mine

I was there the day we got the idea

shall I take you?

you must be a bad one

there you are

you little guy

can you say good day so nicely?

aw, how big you are, come to mommy

hey, what's that?

well it's good, now you're cute

you always reminded me of your father

kiss Me

oops

you must be a bad one

(humming)

that sounds good, keep it up

then it may be that we can afford one day

to a real one

small living, bad one

I have never been so nervous as before this dinner.

Why do you also read the horoscopes?

You're nervous yourself.

It's the first time we've had the boss over for dinner.

What do you think he says to the cold table?

We also get a little warm then. Fish fillet, sirloin steak and sprats.

Daisy, You have covered for four, but we can only have three.

It was the gentleman who asked me.

No, not you.

Mr. Julle called.

- Your brother. - It never works.

Daisy, put on a nicer dress. It is an important dinner.

That's why you have to wear a nicer dress.

(the hum)

It's not the boss, he doesn't sing like that.

Good morning in the living room. Ready for a joke and a joke?

Good day, Lotte. You put on weight, but doesn't suit you.

- I just lost 750 grams. - You can also lose too much weight.

Director Koester arrives and he gets bitter very easily.

- Well, does he do it? - No stories below the waist.

So can I share it with Babs and Nutte?

We hope the director will promote Ludvig to manager.

It will fix it, man. You're in charge before the coffee and cognac.

Good day. Shouldn't we take the cloth off?

What does the lady think of me in black?

Great, Daisy.

Great, Daisy.

Where did you find her? I didn't see her before.

Where has she stripped? Can't I get another trip?

It may well be that she doesn't have that much up here, -

- but what a rise.

- Julle, only one schnapps. - I promise.

There is the director.

- Ms Oestergaard. - Vester.

Welcome.

- May I present accountant Deerspring. - Director Koester.

Lovely house.

Yes, but too small for a bar. That's why we skip the cocktail.

But it is difficult to find an apartment.

I saw in Extra Gazette that you have several properties.

Thank you.

Sorry. I didn't know they were numbered.

Are the sprinklers burnt on? Then serve them as Delfol.

- Lovely table. - Yes. A little, but good.

- You haven't eaten at the office, have you? - No, but I have got a new secretary.

Good idea with a new. You have to change lipstick once in a while.

Will you give the director the salmon?

Well, maybe you're not a big fish eater?

Shall we put the morgue blanket back on?

How about a small sardine?

Perhaps it is the last oil in it?

After all, there are some who have hoarded brandy wine for VAT reasons.

- You have forgotten beer and brandy. - I have that too.

You has never been to the wet goods. Do you remember when you got wet pants?

There was room for a few liters in those baskets.

There you were in short skirts.

I saw an operetta the other day, in which the prima donna was in a dress code.

I didn't hear a word of what she was singing.

It must have been the pelvic area.

Shall we greet director Koester?

I promised only one snaps.

Dear Mr. Director...

Hold on, Ludvig. Now we have to have a good time.

Get some bigger beer glasses.

But it will surely become something when Ludvig has become available...

Predisposed to it.

- How about a small piece of cheese? - A genuine Port Salt from from the store?

(whistles)

(humming)

It's my cheese bell.

I have an acquaintance in the cheese business. Do you know his name?

His name is Cheesefeld.

I have an acquaintance who works at Carlsberg. Do you know his name?

His name is Beer.

It's glorious. It's glorious.

Where do you get it from?

I know a man at Benzon and Fick.

Do you know his name?

And his name is Hansen.

How you are funny.

Fast forward.

This Cheesefeld is a hell of a fellow just like Ludvig.

And then he is full of stories. Now you must hear the funniest.

- The director probably won't hear that. - Yes, damn it.

I'll probably stop talking about it with him, -

- who dropped his hormone pills into Longbridge's machinery, -

- so it couldn't go down.

Julle. Where do you get such stories from?

From you up in Kakado.

- And to Cheesefelds the last. - Don't be an idiot.

Idiots beat Sofia Loren's bra and use it as an ear warmer.

The story takes place on Lolland with the manager family Mortensen.

Miss. Mortensen goes to the doctor because she cannot sleep at night.

"Try lying on your left side," said the doctor. "Then my heart hurts so much."

"Have you tried lying on your stomach?" "Then you don't know Mortensen."

I know one about a bankruptcy.

The robber stands with his gun raised when the bank manager enters.

He shouts: "Fast down on the stomach!"

Then I can't remember anymore.

I can remember it.

The only one who disobeyed was the cashier. She lay down on his back.

Her colleague whispers: "It's a bankruptcy, not a company party."

Anyone want to smoke before we move on to the almond cake?

I think the almonds are a little swollen.

Cheers, Mr. Director.

Surely there is cognac for the coffee?

It was really fun meeting you, Julle.

It was also fun meeting you, Thomas.

I am missing a new manager in the company by the way.

Someone with geist. It must be something for you, Julle.

I can start tomorrow.

Congratulations, Ludvig.

(humming)

So stop with that mosying and that dancing.

Stop it!

I dance and dance as I see fit.

dance is my life

You only know how to read a newspaper.

I'm expanding my horizons. What have you done?

He should know that I am seven years behind with the ironing equipment.

Here is a man who has bought 1,500 kilos of steel.

He wants to knit a public carriage for his wife.

It is fantastic.

And what do you give your wife?

Do you remember when we danced in the palm garden? It was romance.

Yes, many children have been lost in the water since then.

music, music, music

(music from the gramophone)

Such a romantic crap tube.

Get yourself a correspondence course.

The only steps you can take are fool steps.

You old two-timer.

Now you must get panel... cinnamon.

(music)

- One, two, three, four. - Five, six, seven, eight.

I am 17 years old and confirmed, all of Pustevig knows that

then her rumour were crushed Saturday evening at ten o'clock

all my little friends ask today with red cheeks

Who did you kiss in your street door, little Anne Mari?

all the virtuous maidens are strained by jealousy

and they glared at her street door, like a cow at a barn

even they are some flat cows that no man can like

full of slander and trouble ask all of Pustevig

Who did you kiss in your street door, little Anne Mari?

Me.

at home there were lightning, the girl's old got a pop

all the windows of the flat were unfortunately open

then through several streets it was heard faintly

Who did you kiss in your street door, little Anne Mari?

Did you lose something you had before? answer, your hummingbird

where do you want to go in that ballad outfit with feathers and trouble vails?

maybe you are in the embassy's claws, oh shame, oh ugh, oh yuck

You probably have to face Some smacks before the conversation is over

Who did you kiss in your street door, little Anne Mari?

Me.

there whole street hear the smacks and afterwards dad disappeared

- down with peace and the smear jaw - who have you kissed...

but on the third floor at home, mom's gentle voice sounded

Who did you kiss in your street door, little Anne Mari?

Him, the long orange pipe, I don't like

After all, she herself once got hurt one evening in a street brawl

and then she could walk on her flat feet home from spring gone

so now I get coffee with chocolate frogs if I just want to say

Who did you kiss in your street door, little Anne Mari?

Me.

little Anne Mari practiced keeping her mouth shut

but it's probably quite an experience to walk through Pustevig

when she comes, the boys yell very loud and penetrating

Who did you kiss in your street door, little Anne Mari?

before she only bit chocolate frogs, that time is over

Him, the long orange pipe I so tenderly was with before

has a girlfriend in each door in all of Pustevig

even though she was a reffined before, I am going to propose

who should I kiss in your street door, little Anne Mari?

Me.

(squeal)

--- Subtitles by Essery. ---