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1
00:01:10,500 --> 00:01:12,100
Fuck,
fuck, fuck! So late!
2
00:01:13,300 --> 00:01:14,700
Mabel's put
a scarf on the cat.
3
00:01:14,700 --> 00:01:17,000
He's not a
cat. He's my husband.
4
00:01:17,100 --> 00:01:19,000
Where is he?
5
00:01:19,100 --> 00:01:22,000
- Will he bring the ladies with the big boobies?
- "Ladies"?
6
00:01:22,100 --> 00:01:24,200
Last time, he
brushed my hair with a fork.
7
00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:26,600
There were three ladies,
and they had an epic pillow fight.
8
00:01:26,600 --> 00:01:29,200
- The fork had maple syrup on it.
- Out of the way, darling.
9
00:01:29,300 --> 00:01:30,700
Well,
10
00:01:30,700 --> 00:01:33,400
it's obvious he's not coming,
so I'll just stay home.
11
00:01:33,400 --> 00:01:36,400
You said this was the one thing you
had to leave the house for this year.
12
00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:37,600
You're
right. I'm going.
13
00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:39,300
Move, please, Mabes.
14
00:01:41,500 --> 00:01:44,500
Fuck... caccia.
15
00:01:44,500 --> 00:01:46,200
Did we eat the focaccia?
16
00:01:47,700 --> 00:01:50,600
Well, we haven't
got any vegetables.
17
00:01:50,600 --> 00:01:55,200
But lucky you, you get
to have frozen peas. Mmm.
18
00:01:55,200 --> 00:01:57,500
All right. Come to the table.
19
00:01:57,500 --> 00:01:59,300
Come on.
20
00:01:59,300 --> 00:02:03,800
One, two...
21
00:02:03,800 --> 00:02:06,300
What am I going
to do when I get to three?
22
00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:09,400
Please
enter alarm code.
23
00:02:09,500 --> 00:02:11,200
Oh, fuck,
oh, fuck, oh, fuck!
24
00:02:11,300 --> 00:02:13,300
- Please enter alarm code.
- No! Don't put the flames out.
25
00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:15,400
- We can toast marshmallows.
- Please enter alarm code.
26
00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:17,200
Please...
27
00:02:23,700 --> 00:02:27,700
The tension of our bodies,
28
00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:31,100
the scars of...
29
00:02:31,100 --> 00:02:32,700
Hello, Moto.
30
00:02:36,700 --> 00:02:38,500
...in... in our longing.
31
00:02:38,500 --> 00:02:40,100
Bridget Jones, always exciting.
32
00:02:40,200 --> 00:02:42,700
- How's the skirt?
- Daniel, hi.
33
00:02:42,700 --> 00:02:45,200
Just checking you have indeed
forgotten about tonight.
34
00:02:45,200 --> 00:02:48,700
That is hurtful, Jones. I
have absolutely not forgotten.
35
00:02:48,700 --> 00:02:50,500
No.
36
00:02:50,500 --> 00:02:52,600
I'm so sorry. It's my mother.
37
00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:54,600
- She's in the hospital.
- Oh.
38
00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:56,800
- Primordial sweat.
- I will be there
39
00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:59,500
quicker than it took me to bring
you to earth-shattering orgasm,
40
00:02:59,500 --> 00:03:01,300
you filthy little harlot.
41
00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:07,700
Love you, Mummy.
42
00:03:09,300 --> 00:03:10,400
"Mummy"?
43
00:03:10,400 --> 00:03:11,800
Darling, clever Geminita.
44
00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:14,600
I'm gonna have to rush.
It's a family emergency.
45
00:03:14,600 --> 00:03:16,600
But I am loving this one.
46
00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:18,400
I think... I think we
all are, aren't we?
47
00:03:18,500 --> 00:03:20,200
Call me later, yeah?
48
00:03:21,600 --> 00:03:22,600
Oh, yeah.
49
00:03:22,700 --> 00:03:25,400
I am imminent, Jones. Imminent.
50
00:03:25,500 --> 00:03:27,100
Un-bunch those giant panties.
51
00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:38,600
Bloody zip
manufacturers should be
52
00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:40,700
cancelled for sociological bias.
53
00:03:40,700 --> 00:03:44,400
It is actually impossible
to do this on your own.
54
00:03:44,500 --> 00:03:47,300
Help.
55
00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:54,400
Ooh. Thank you, monkeys.
56
00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:55,800
Uncle Daniel!
57
00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:57,300
Miniature Darcy,
what's the news?
58
00:03:57,400 --> 00:03:58,900
Where are the
ladies with the big...
59
00:03:58,900 --> 00:04:00,800
Hair? They
couldn't make it, sadly.
60
00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:02,600
They're, um... They're
washing their hair.
61
00:04:02,600 --> 00:04:04,200
All three?
62
00:04:04,300 --> 00:04:05,800
Yeah, well, they wash
each other's, you see.
63
00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:08,500
I thought you said
no more models.
64
00:04:08,500 --> 00:04:10,300
Geminita is not a model, Jones.
65
00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:12,300
She is a poet and a healer,
66
00:04:12,300 --> 00:04:13,500
and a model.
67
00:04:13,500 --> 00:04:14,600
Come here.
68
00:04:16,400 --> 00:04:17,600
Hell of a night for you.
69
00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:20,600
Ugh, I can't go. The
children need me.
70
00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:22,000
Uncle Daniel!
71
00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:23,800
You. Right.
72
00:04:23,800 --> 00:04:26,300
Get a fork and some syrup.
I'm gonna style you.
73
00:04:26,300 --> 00:04:28,800
- I found the cards.
- Very good. Excellent.
74
00:04:28,900 --> 00:04:32,900
Now then, we need to work on
your bluffing and your cheating.
75
00:04:51,600 --> 00:04:54,300
Life has
its white notes...
76
00:04:57,600 --> 00:05:00,700
and life has its black notes.
77
00:05:03,900 --> 00:05:06,800
You look very beautiful
tonight, Mrs Darcy.
78
00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:10,200
Not looking so bad
yourself, Mr Darcy.
79
00:05:25,500 --> 00:05:26,900
Bridget.
80
00:05:26,900 --> 00:05:28,900
Very black notes.
81
00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:31,800
Jolly good. Come in. Weather's
been a bit shitty, hasn't it?
82
00:05:31,900 --> 00:05:33,400
- Though the cricket this year has been...
- Jeremy.
83
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:36,000
...absolutely phenomenal.
84
00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:39,800
This is what happened.
85
00:05:39,900 --> 00:05:42,500
Mark Darcy, my husband,
86
00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:44,700
father to Billy and Mabel,
87
00:05:44,700 --> 00:05:46,500
died.
88
00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:48,800
Or rather, was killed
89
00:05:48,900 --> 00:05:52,300
in the Sudan on a
humanitarian mission.
90
00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:56,500
- Everybody's just upstairs.
- Thanks.
91
00:05:56,500 --> 00:05:59,500
And that was four
years ago. Today, actually.
92
00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:03,900
Brace yourself. It's a
total fucking shit show.
93
00:06:03,900 --> 00:06:09,600
And even though there might
be 600,000 words in the human language,
94
00:06:09,600 --> 00:06:12,900
the world still struggles
to find the right ones
95
00:06:12,900 --> 00:06:15,800
when someone you love is gone.
96
00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:17,600
Bridget, how are the children?
97
00:06:17,600 --> 00:06:18,900
- Mmm.
- Are they...
98
00:06:18,900 --> 00:06:20,800
Are they all right
without you there?
99
00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:23,800
No. It's fine.
100
00:06:23,900 --> 00:06:26,900
Left them some crystal
meth in the kitchen.
101
00:06:28,900 --> 00:06:30,600
Maybe not.
102
00:06:30,600 --> 00:06:32,700
Well, we don't make
a thing about it.
103
00:06:32,700 --> 00:06:34,800
We celebrate Mark's
birthday instead.
104
00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:35,900
Oh.
105
00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:38,400
So, Bridget, still on your own?
106
00:06:38,400 --> 00:06:40,000
It's been four years now.
107
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:42,600
You're still in pretty
good nick. Why no chap?
108
00:06:42,600 --> 00:06:45,800
Now, now. It's not Bridget's fault.
Very hard, being a middle-aged woman
109
00:06:45,800 --> 00:06:47,400
- and finding yourself single.
- Mmm.
110
00:06:47,400 --> 00:06:50,800
Better if you're a bloke.
Look at Binko Carruthers.
111
00:06:50,800 --> 00:06:52,400
He's no oil painting,
112
00:06:52,400 --> 00:06:55,600
but the second Rosemary
died, he was inundated.
113
00:06:55,600 --> 00:06:59,400
Of course, they were all of a
certain age, though, weren't they?
114
00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:01,500
Sorry, do you realise
you said that out loud?
115
00:07:01,600 --> 00:07:03,900
Hmm?
116
00:07:03,900 --> 00:07:07,000
"A certain age"? What,
do you mean our age?
117
00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:09,100
- That is the most...
- Shazzer now hosts
118
00:07:09,100 --> 00:07:10,700
a podcast calledFed Up,
119
00:07:10,700 --> 00:07:12,500
in which she has dinner
with minor celebrities
120
00:07:12,500 --> 00:07:15,000
while basically getting
furious about everything.
121
00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:17,100
...sexist fucking
universe we, unbelievably,
122
00:07:17,100 --> 00:07:19,900
still continue to
fucking inhabit.
123
00:07:24,800 --> 00:07:26,500
I need to go to the toilet.
124
00:07:26,600 --> 00:07:28,000
Oh.
125
00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:30,000
Oh, dear.
126
00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:34,100
Yeah, Jude. Yeah,
I'm with her now.
127
00:07:34,100 --> 00:07:36,800
Well, Shaz, tell her
to come to The Golden Cock.
128
00:07:36,900 --> 00:07:40,200
No, no, no. The
party. It's for Mark.
129
00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:42,800
That's not a party.
That's a fucking bin fire.
130
00:07:42,900 --> 00:07:45,700
And you think that Mark would want
you to stay here and be insulted
131
00:07:45,700 --> 00:07:48,000
in the fucking sexism Olympics?
132
00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:49,900
To Mark.
133
00:07:49,900 --> 00:07:51,100
- And to Bridget...
- Aw.
134
00:07:51,100 --> 00:07:52,600
...and the rare
pleasure of seeing you
135
00:07:52,600 --> 00:07:54,100
in something not made
of terry towelling.
136
00:07:54,100 --> 00:07:56,100
Tom, still living
137
00:07:56,200 --> 00:07:58,800
handsomely off
his one hit single
138
00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:03,100
which had a comeback recently in a
30-second video of a dog doing maths.
139
00:08:03,200 --> 00:08:06,100
Now, of all things,
a life coach.
140
00:08:06,100 --> 00:08:08,800
Honestly, I'd say it was
a bit of a breakthrough,
141
00:08:08,900 --> 00:08:11,000
speaking as your psychologist.
142
00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:12,800
You're not
my psychologist.
143
00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:14,700
Well, I should be, yes.
144
00:08:14,700 --> 00:08:16,400
According to the classic model,
145
00:08:16,500 --> 00:08:18,600
you've actually made
it to the fourth stage
146
00:08:18,700 --> 00:08:22,500
- of the five stages of grief.
- Wait. Isn't it seven stages?
147
00:08:22,500 --> 00:08:25,000
What are you talking about, Jude?
No, it isn't. It's five stages.
148
00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:27,000
- Isn't it five?
- Well, I always thought it was four.
149
00:08:27,100 --> 00:08:28,700
It's definitely seven.
150
00:08:28,700 --> 00:08:31,000
Jude, now CEO or COO
151
00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:33,800
or CTO, definitely
a C-something-O,
152
00:08:33,900 --> 00:08:37,500
still regularly calling, in
tears, from executive bathroom.
153
00:08:37,500 --> 00:08:40,900
So, um, only one stage
to go now, Bridge.
154
00:08:40,900 --> 00:08:43,200
- Oh.
- Stage five.
155
00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:45,800
It's acceptance,
which basically means
156
00:08:45,800 --> 00:08:49,000
- you just have to get laid.
- Oh, my God. Shazzer's right.
157
00:08:49,100 --> 00:08:52,100
Yes. I mean, honestly,
darling, look at yourself.
158
00:08:52,100 --> 00:08:54,500
You've become a
born-again virgin.
159
00:08:54,500 --> 00:08:57,900
If you don't get laid soon, your
vagina will literally reseal itself.
160
00:08:57,900 --> 00:08:59,900
Yeah, and
that is a thing.
161
00:08:59,900 --> 00:09:03,200
It's called labial adhesion.
162
00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:04,800
Oh, my God!
163
00:09:04,900 --> 00:09:08,000
I knew leaving the
kitchen was a mistake.
164
00:09:08,100 --> 00:09:09,800
I don't want anyone else.
165
00:09:09,900 --> 00:09:11,600
And even if I did,
which I don't,
166
00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:14,800
I'm non-viable,
completely asexual,
167
00:09:14,800 --> 00:09:16,900
and nobody will
ever fancy me again.
168
00:09:16,900 --> 00:09:18,600
- Ever, ever, ever.
- No. No, no, no.
169
00:09:18,700 --> 00:09:20,600
And I'm going to the toilet.
170
00:09:22,100 --> 00:09:23,900
Crash and burn.
That was a disaster.
171
00:09:23,900 --> 00:09:25,100
Well, that was a
fucking disaster.
172
00:09:29,300 --> 00:09:31,600
Crikey. Have we been burgled?
173
00:09:31,700 --> 00:09:33,900
We have not
been burgled, Jones. No.
174
00:09:33,900 --> 00:09:36,100
We have been marvellous.
Now, tell me this.
175
00:09:36,200 --> 00:09:40,700
For Tonya, do we think a
kitten heel or a chunky wedge?
176
00:09:40,700 --> 00:09:41,700
She's going to Wimbledon.
177
00:09:41,700 --> 00:09:43,500
Wedge, obviously.
178
00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:45,200
You may be right.
179
00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:47,700
How was it? Any fun? Any tongue?
180
00:09:47,700 --> 00:09:51,800
Ugh. God. No tongue. I
have hung up my tongue.
181
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:53,600
How were they?
182
00:09:53,700 --> 00:09:55,200
Well, the girl is you.
183
00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:59,600
Lawless, romantic,
irresistibly drawn to me.
184
00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:01,600
Asked me if I was going
to be her new daddy.
185
00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:03,100
She does that.
186
00:10:03,100 --> 00:10:06,500
Yeah. Wouldn't go to bed
until I'd married her rabbit.
187
00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:08,900
- Hmm.
- Which I was very happy to do.
188
00:10:08,900 --> 00:10:10,800
That rabbit is not
at all unfanciable.
189
00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:12,200
Hmm. And Billy?
190
00:10:12,300 --> 00:10:14,800
Well, Billy is Darcy, isn't he?
191
00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:17,200
Still waters and all that.
192
00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:19,600
As it happens, Jones, your son
193
00:10:19,600 --> 00:10:21,900
and I have a number
of shared interests.
194
00:10:21,900 --> 00:10:24,200
Oh, God. Like what?
195
00:10:24,300 --> 00:10:25,600
Models.
196
00:10:25,600 --> 00:10:27,600
He showed me his,
I showed him mine.
197
00:10:27,700 --> 00:10:30,600
-Hmm.
-And then we... we talked about death.
198
00:10:30,600 --> 00:10:31,600
Did you?
199
00:10:31,600 --> 00:10:33,600
Yeah. I told
him being dead was shit.
200
00:10:33,700 --> 00:10:36,000
And that I should know
because I was for a bit.
201
00:10:36,100 --> 00:10:37,700
And then, uh...
202
00:10:37,700 --> 00:10:40,600
I gave him a hug 'cause
he seemed a bit sad.
203
00:10:40,700 --> 00:10:43,300
And then that made me
sad because...
204
00:10:43,300 --> 00:10:45,000
How is your boy?
205
00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:47,100
Enzo's, what? He's...
206
00:10:47,100 --> 00:10:49,200
Uh, fuck knows, Jones.
Fifteen, I think.
207
00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:54,100
Anyway, we then cheered ourselves up
by digging out the cocktail shaker,
208
00:10:54,200 --> 00:10:56,100
and I taught him how
to make a Dirty Bitch.
209
00:10:56,100 --> 00:10:57,700
Saved it for you.
It's in the fridge.
210
00:10:57,700 --> 00:11:00,100
Goody. Have it for breakfast.
211
00:11:00,100 --> 00:11:02,200
Yeah, hello, hello,
hello, hello.
212
00:11:02,200 --> 00:11:03,800
Geminita.
213
00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:06,100
Yeah, we're all done.
All done. I'm on my way.
214
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:09,100
Well, as quick as I can.
215
00:11:09,100 --> 00:11:12,900
Yes, like naughty old
moth to eager young flame.
216
00:11:12,900 --> 00:11:15,300
No, you hang up first.
217
00:11:16,300 --> 00:11:18,200
And... OK, kiss you back.
218
00:11:19,800 --> 00:11:22,000
Yeah, OK.
Louder. Yeah.
219
00:11:22,100 --> 00:11:23,900
Oh, my God.
220
00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:29,300
Fuck off, Jones.
OK, they're asleep.
221
00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:31,800
Um... ...it
did take a bit of time.
222
00:11:31,800 --> 00:11:33,900
But I... Actually I showed
them a video of Geminita
223
00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:36,800
reciting one of her prose poems
and they were out like a light.
224
00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:40,700
All right.
225
00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:45,100
What happens now?
226
00:11:45,100 --> 00:11:47,900
I'm trying to remember how it
worked with our babysitters.
227
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:51,800
I think you give me 20 quid
and try and shag me, don't you?
228
00:11:51,800 --> 00:11:55,100
Ah,
Daniel, dear Daniel.
229
00:11:55,100 --> 00:11:57,800
At least some
things never change.
230
00:11:57,900 --> 00:12:01,200
It makes me sad though,
Jones. You know...
231
00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:06,300
two children and you all
alone and effectively a nun.
232
00:12:06,300 --> 00:12:09,700
Albeit, of course, a
very, very naughty nun.
233
00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:16,100
Bye, Daniel.
234
00:12:16,100 --> 00:12:17,300
Yeah.
235
00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:19,800
Thanks for tonight.
236
00:12:19,800 --> 00:12:20,900
Yeah.
237
00:12:25,700 --> 00:12:28,400
Why are
these lights still on?
238
00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:30,700
I thought you two were asleep.
239
00:12:31,500 --> 00:12:34,100
Do you miss Dada sometimes?
240
00:12:34,100 --> 00:12:36,200
I miss him all of the times.
241
00:12:41,300 --> 00:12:44,100
There's my owl.
242
00:12:44,100 --> 00:12:46,000
Back to bed. Come on.
243
00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:48,300
- Story, Mama?
- Mm-hmm.
244
00:12:53,500 --> 00:12:59,400
For the baby princess is
as kind as she is fair.
245
00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:06,300
And the baby prince is as
gentle as he is handsome.
246
00:13:06,300 --> 00:13:10,400
And wherever they go
and whatever they do,
247
00:13:10,500 --> 00:13:14,200
Mummy and Daddy will
always love them.
248
00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:18,900
And Saliva.
249
00:13:18,900 --> 00:13:22,000
She stinks, Mabes.
250
00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:24,100
Oh!
251
00:13:30,900 --> 00:13:32,800
- Good night, darling.
- Good night, Mama.
252
00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:40,800
Good night.
253
00:13:43,100 --> 00:13:44,300
And all the thoughts...
254
00:13:47,800 --> 00:13:50,900
And all the thoughts
are going away.
255
00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:55,300
They don't need little
Billy and Mabel tonight.
256
00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:58,800
The world will
turn without them.
257
00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:01,900
The stars
will shine without them.
258
00:14:01,900 --> 00:14:08,300
And all little Billy and Mabel
need to do is rest and sleep.
259
00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,200
Good night.
260
00:14:12,100 --> 00:14:13,100
Night.
261
00:14:18,300 --> 00:14:19,800
Good night, Billy.
262
00:14:19,900 --> 00:14:22,500
- Do the song, Daddy. Please.
- OK.
263
00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:27,900
♪ I'll do anything
For you, dear ♪
264
00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:29,400
♪ Anything ♪
265
00:14:29,500 --> 00:14:34,400
♪ For you mean
everything To me ♪
266
00:14:39,300 --> 00:14:42,300
All by myself 47.
267
00:14:44,900 --> 00:14:45,900
Shitballs.
268
00:14:47,300 --> 00:14:51,900
No. Cock-bollocking
fuck-bubbles!
269
00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:58,000
Literally everyone
else in the whole country
270
00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:00,400
is laughing uproariously
with their partners
271
00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:03,300
while watching Netflix
and having sex.
272
00:15:03,300 --> 00:15:05,600
You don't want to
wallow in it, darling.
273
00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:08,100
And there
they are again.
274
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:11,200
All the voices, all the advice.
275
00:15:11,200 --> 00:15:13,200
You gotta wallow in
it, Bridge. Wallow.
276
00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:17,300
Grieve. G-R-E-I-V-E.
277
00:15:17,300 --> 00:15:20,600
It's
I-E. It's not E-I.
278
00:15:20,600 --> 00:15:24,300
No, it's, "I before
E except after C."
279
00:15:24,300 --> 00:15:25,900
Yes, exactly.
280
00:15:25,900 --> 00:15:29,200
God, you really
are such a T-W-T-A.
281
00:15:29,200 --> 00:15:30,600
A what?
282
00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:32,500
The thing
about advice is,
283
00:15:32,500 --> 00:15:36,400
no one tells you the
same thing twice.
284
00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:39,500
Bridget, you've got to
put the children first.
285
00:15:39,500 --> 00:15:43,200
Uh-huh.
Thank you, Magda. Yes.
286
00:15:43,300 --> 00:15:46,100
Put the children first.
287
00:15:46,100 --> 00:15:47,300
Sod the children.
288
00:15:47,300 --> 00:15:50,300
Put your own oxygen
mask on first.
289
00:15:50,300 --> 00:15:53,200
Right. Oxygen mask.
290
00:15:53,200 --> 00:15:54,400
Got it.
291
00:15:54,500 --> 00:15:56,400
One thing's for certain, Bridge.
292
00:15:56,400 --> 00:15:59,000
Forget about sex.
Oh.
293
00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:00,600
OK.
294
00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:02,500
No sex.
295
00:16:02,500 --> 00:16:04,500
You need to have a lot of sex.
296
00:16:04,500 --> 00:16:07,600
Yeah. Why don't you
come back to work?
297
00:16:07,700 --> 00:16:11,600
Thank you, Richard.
I'll bear that in mind.
298
00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:27,400
But as my dad said
just before he died,
299
00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:30,300
the big question is...
300
00:16:30,300 --> 00:16:32,400
Can you survive?
301
00:16:35,300 --> 00:16:36,400
I think so.
302
00:16:37,500 --> 00:16:38,700
I have to.
303
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:42,000
I'm trying.
304
00:16:45,200 --> 00:16:47,700
It's not enough to survive.
You've got to live.
305
00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:51,200
Is that the Dalai Lama?
306
00:16:52,500 --> 00:16:54,100
It's Harry Styles, I think.
307
00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:55,500
Colin.
308
00:16:55,600 --> 00:16:58,200
- Is that a sausage?
- What sausage?
309
00:16:58,300 --> 00:17:02,000
Bridget, you know what the
doctor said about saturated fats.
310
00:17:02,100 --> 00:17:06,100
Pam, could you take a photograph
of us? Me and Bridget.
311
00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:11,000
Um...
312
00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:15,600
Colin, try not to do
that with your chin.
313
00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:17,500
I'm not doing
anything with my chin.
314
00:17:22,300 --> 00:17:24,400
Promise me you'll live, Bridget.
315
00:17:26,300 --> 00:17:28,000
Smile!
316
00:18:28,600 --> 00:18:32,100
Bridget Jones,
it's time to live.
317
00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:36,500
♪ I know when to go out ♪
318
00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:39,100
♪ Know when to stay in ♪
319
00:18:40,300 --> 00:18:41,700
♪ Get things done ♪
320
00:18:45,500 --> 00:18:48,200
♪ I catch a paper boy ♪
321
00:18:48,300 --> 00:18:51,400
♪ But things Don't
really change ♪
322
00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:53,600
♪ I'm standing in the wind ♪
323
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:56,300
♪ But I never wave bye-bye ♪
324
00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:01,300
♪ But I try ♪
325
00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:04,100
♪ I try ♪
326
00:19:07,800 --> 00:19:08,700
♪ Never gonna fall for ♪
327
00:19:08,700 --> 00:19:09,800
♪ Modern love ♪
328
00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:11,500
♪ Walks beside me ♪
329
00:19:11,600 --> 00:19:12,600
♪ Modern love ♪
330
00:19:12,700 --> 00:19:14,200
♪ Walks on by ♪
331
00:19:14,300 --> 00:19:15,300
♪ Modern love ♪
332
00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:16,400
♪ Gets me to ♪
333
00:19:16,500 --> 00:19:19,400
♪ The church on time ♪
334
00:19:19,500 --> 00:19:20,700
♪ Church on time ♪
335
00:19:20,700 --> 00:19:22,400
♪ Terrifies me ♪
336
00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:23,400
♪ Church on time ♪
337
00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:24,600
♪ Makes me party ♪
338
00:19:24,600 --> 00:19:26,100
♪ Church on time ♪
339
00:19:26,200 --> 00:19:29,700
♪ Puts my trust in God and man ♪
340
00:19:29,800 --> 00:19:31,300
♪ God and man ♪
341
00:19:31,300 --> 00:19:32,500
♪ No confession ♪
342
00:19:32,500 --> 00:19:33,700
♪ God and man ♪
343
00:19:33,700 --> 00:19:35,300
♪ No religion ♪
344
00:19:35,300 --> 00:19:36,600
♪ God and man ♪
345
00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:40,300
♪ Don't believe in modern love ♪
346
00:20:15,700 --> 00:20:18,600
♪ It's not really work ♪
347
00:20:18,600 --> 00:20:20,700
♪ It's just the power to charm ♪
348
00:20:20,700 --> 00:20:23,500
♪ I'm still standing
in The wind ♪
349
00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:26,400
♪ But I never wave bye-bye ♪
350
00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:31,300
♪ But I try ♪
351
00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:33,900
♪ I try ♪
352
00:20:36,800 --> 00:20:37,800
♪ Never gonna fall for ♪
353
00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:39,500
♪ Modern love ♪
354
00:20:39,500 --> 00:20:40,700
♪ Walks beside me ♪
355
00:20:40,700 --> 00:20:42,200
♪ Modern love ♪
356
00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:43,300
♪ Walks on by ♪
357
00:20:43,400 --> 00:20:44,400
♪ Modern love ♪
358
00:20:44,500 --> 00:20:46,500
♪ Gets me to the church ♪
359
00:20:46,500 --> 00:20:48,300
♪ On time ♪
360
00:20:48,400 --> 00:20:49,700
♪ Modern love... ♪
361
00:20:49,700 --> 00:20:51,500
Right. You've
got your pencil case,
362
00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:53,400
your lunch, your homework?
363
00:20:53,400 --> 00:20:54,800
- Your keys?
- Ooh.
364
00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:56,900
Well,
365
00:20:56,900 --> 00:20:59,700
you've definitely got your
recorder so that's good.
366
00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:02,400
Your lovely picture
of a spaceship.
367
00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:04,300
It's a cat.
368
00:21:05,700 --> 00:21:07,400
Oh, yes. Of course
it is, darling.
369
00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:08,700
What paints did you use?
370
00:21:08,700 --> 00:21:11,600
I used the lipsticks
with the C's on them.
371
00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:13,300
- Oh. So creative.
- Handbag?
372
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:14,800
Oh, fuck a duck.
373
00:21:14,800 --> 00:21:16,400
Hello, Billy.
374
00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:17,500
Morning.
375
00:21:17,500 --> 00:21:19,300
Hello, Mabel.
376
00:21:19,300 --> 00:21:20,300
Morning, Bridget.
377
00:21:20,300 --> 00:21:21,400
Hi.
378
00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:22,800
Just the usual crap.
379
00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:25,500
Are you going to
be my new daddy?
380
00:21:27,300 --> 00:21:29,500
- No, Mum!
- No! Mum!
381
00:21:29,500 --> 00:21:30,700
When I signed up
for having children,
382
00:21:30,700 --> 00:21:32,400
I did not sign up to be ruled by
383
00:21:32,400 --> 00:21:34,300
a gaggle of computer crackheads.
384
00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:35,600
Well, guess what?
385
00:21:35,700 --> 00:21:37,800
I've had you, I've
brought you up,
386
00:21:37,800 --> 00:21:39,900
and I've changed my mind!
387
00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:43,700
No! No, no, no!
388
00:21:43,700 --> 00:21:46,700
Don't you touch those or I'll
fucking enter you in Squid Game.
389
00:21:46,700 --> 00:21:47,700
Here, darling.
390
00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:49,600
- Come, come.
- Mum!
391
00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:51,300
Why don't we ever say hello?
392
00:21:51,300 --> 00:21:53,900
Oh. Important
life lesson, darling.
393
00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:56,300
Never meet your heroes.
394
00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:03,800
Starting today,
will not set things on fire,
395
00:22:03,900 --> 00:22:08,000
will responsibly reset passwords
not to include the word "fuckwit,"
396
00:22:08,100 --> 00:22:11,700
and will not be frightened
of the school mums...
397
00:22:11,700 --> 00:22:13,300
Hi.
398
00:22:13,400 --> 00:22:16,800
...in particular,
Perfect Nicolette...
399
00:22:18,600 --> 00:22:20,700
...with her perfect twins.
400
00:22:22,700 --> 00:22:25,700
Move the car! There's no
parking in front of the school.
401
00:22:25,700 --> 00:22:27,500
- How are you?
- What?
402
00:22:27,500 --> 00:22:29,700
I-I thought you were in LA.
403
00:22:29,700 --> 00:22:32,800
- Right.
- Mr Walliker?
404
00:22:32,900 --> 00:22:35,900
Mr Walliker, Eros tells me he hasn't been
selected for the choir for some reason.
405
00:22:35,900 --> 00:22:37,900
- Correct.
- Well, how can that be?
406
00:22:37,900 --> 00:22:40,400
Because he can't sing. Anything
else, Mrs Soltani-Watkins?
407
00:22:40,500 --> 00:22:43,400
Mr Walliker, if you have failed to
recognise Eros's obvious talents,
408
00:22:43,500 --> 00:22:45,300
- that's hardly his fault.
- It's really quite simple.
409
00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:47,900
The choir, like everything else
in nature, is chosen on merit.
410
00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:50,300
Yeah, natural selection.
411
00:22:50,400 --> 00:22:52,700
If Eros wants to put in the work,
he's welcome to audition again.
412
00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:54,700
If you'll excuse me.
Bike!
413
00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:56,500
Bike! Not there. Not there.
414
00:22:56,600 --> 00:22:57,900
Who's that?
415
00:22:57,900 --> 00:23:00,000
Oh. New science
teacher. Mr Walliker.
416
00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:01,500
Instant hero.
417
00:23:01,600 --> 00:23:03,300
Unbelievably rude.
418
00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:04,600
He's awful.
419
00:23:04,600 --> 00:23:07,000
Move along, please. Right away!
420
00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:11,300
You two! This isn't a
stroll on the heath.
421
00:23:11,400 --> 00:23:15,000
You don't see me unfolding deck chairs
and unwrapping sandwiches, do you?
422
00:23:15,100 --> 00:23:17,900
Move it inside! It's
choir in eight minutes.
423
00:23:17,900 --> 00:23:20,600
Mr Walliker. Hello.
424
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:21,900
I don't believe we've met.
425
00:23:21,900 --> 00:23:23,500
I'm Billy Darcy's mum.
426
00:23:23,500 --> 00:23:26,000
The boy about to be
diagnosed with tinnitus.
427
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:28,500
The whistle is an
essential tool, Mrs Darcy.
428
00:23:28,500 --> 00:23:30,700
Mmm. An essential tool?
429
00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:33,100
What an apt
description.
430
00:23:34,900 --> 00:23:37,000
Eros! Atticus!
431
00:23:37,100 --> 00:23:39,900
If you're late, you will regret
it for the rest of your days.
432
00:23:39,900 --> 00:23:41,500
Sorry, sir!
433
00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:49,400
No!
434
00:23:50,100 --> 00:23:51,700
She'll be back later.
435
00:23:51,700 --> 00:23:52,900
We have a doctor's appointment.
436
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:54,600
I've got worms!
437
00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:58,000
Why is your granny
wearing pyjamas?
438
00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:01,600
That went well.
439
00:24:03,700 --> 00:24:06,400
"G-O-N-O"...
440
00:24:06,500 --> 00:24:08,100
That's
lovely, darling.
441
00:24:08,100 --> 00:24:09,900
- "R-H"...
- There you go.
442
00:24:09,900 --> 00:24:11,800
One tablet a day for
the entire family,
443
00:24:11,800 --> 00:24:15,000
and if her itching doesn't stop,
I suggest you get rid of that cat.
444
00:24:15,100 --> 00:24:17,400
Have
you got some help yet?
445
00:24:17,400 --> 00:24:19,400
I know it doesn't
look it, but really,
446
00:24:19,500 --> 00:24:21,900
- I've got it all in hand.
- No, it doesn't look it.
447
00:24:21,900 --> 00:24:25,100
Apart from anything else, I'm a
gynaecologist, not a paediatrician.
448
00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:28,800
And whilst I'm happy to step
in, you do take my point.
449
00:24:28,900 --> 00:24:32,600
If you say "oxygen mask" to me again,
I will hit you with this handbag.
450
00:24:32,600 --> 00:24:33,900
I am not afraid of handbags.
451
00:24:33,900 --> 00:24:36,000
You need something else to do.
452
00:24:36,100 --> 00:24:38,500
You need a reason to get
out of those pyjamas.
453
00:24:38,500 --> 00:24:40,600
Well, fashion's never
really been your thing.
454
00:24:40,600 --> 00:24:42,700
- Rude.
- Pyjamas are all the rage in Milan.
455
00:24:42,700 --> 00:24:46,000
Bridget, in spite of all objective
evidence to the contrary,
456
00:24:46,100 --> 00:24:48,000
you are a bright,
talented, brilliant woman.
457
00:24:48,100 --> 00:24:50,600
And my professional
advice to you is this.
458
00:24:50,600 --> 00:24:51,900
- You need...
- No. No, no, no.
459
00:24:51,900 --> 00:24:53,600
Please don't tell me
to go and have sex.
460
00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:54,800
Oh, good Lord, no.
461
00:24:54,800 --> 00:24:56,900
No.
462
00:24:57,000 --> 00:24:59,500
Read a book. Clean out
the kitchen drawers.
463
00:24:59,500 --> 00:25:01,700
Leave the pink bits
well enough alone.
464
00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:03,000
You'll be ready
when you're ready.
465
00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:05,800
No, my professional
advice to you is this:
466
00:25:05,800 --> 00:25:08,100
go back to work.
467
00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:09,900
And how's your love life?
468
00:25:10,700 --> 00:25:12,500
On fire.
469
00:25:12,500 --> 00:25:16,000
"Sy-P-Lis."
470
00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:22,500
- Mmm.
- Syphilis. Mabel, Syphilis.
471
00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:23,700
Syphilis.
472
00:25:23,700 --> 00:25:25,900
Mmm. Very good. Very good.
473
00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:29,000
And there's some delicious
vegetarian alternatives here too.
474
00:25:30,900 --> 00:25:33,700
Floods, fires and famine.
475
00:25:33,700 --> 00:25:36,700
As the world teeters on the
edge of climate catastrophe,
476
00:25:36,700 --> 00:25:39,500
sausages aren't the only
thing we are grilling today.
477
00:25:39,500 --> 00:25:43,200
Environment Secretary Sarah
Givens joins us after the break.
478
00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:48,700
Hi.
479
00:25:48,700 --> 00:25:49,800
Oh, thank God you picked up.
480
00:25:49,800 --> 00:25:51,800
What's the matter?
481
00:25:51,800 --> 00:25:54,400
They've got the bloody Environment
Secretary on in 45 seconds
482
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:57,100
and they've got me asking her
questions about bloody tea bags.
483
00:25:57,100 --> 00:25:59,400
"What's the best way
to recycle tea bags?"
484
00:25:59,500 --> 00:26:01,500
"Can you clean
surfaces with tea"...
485
00:26:01,500 --> 00:26:02,500
I need you, Bridget!
486
00:26:02,500 --> 00:26:04,400
OK. Uh...
487
00:26:04,500 --> 00:26:06,100
Ask her...
488
00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:08,500
Ask her why there were no tax
breaks for renewable energy
489
00:26:08,500 --> 00:26:10,400
- in last week's budget.
- Brilliant.
490
00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:12,900
She'll fob you off with some
crap about economic constraints
491
00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:17,000
and then you nail her on oil and gas
companies ring-fencing their profits.
492
00:26:17,100 --> 00:26:19,600
- Yes, I do.
- She'll flap!
493
00:26:19,700 --> 00:26:23,400
And then you nuke her arse on the
government's support for fracking.
494
00:26:23,500 --> 00:26:24,600
Ooh.
495
00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:26,500
I fracking love
you, Bridget Jones.
496
00:26:26,500 --> 00:26:28,100
- Hi, Bridge.
- Yes!
497
00:26:28,100 --> 00:26:31,900
Oh, oh, oh! Do try to find
out about the tea bags though.
498
00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:33,900
- Love you. Bye. Bye.
- Love you. Bye!
499
00:26:35,900 --> 00:26:37,500
Welcome back.
500
00:26:37,500 --> 00:26:38,900
Our next guest is
501
00:26:38,900 --> 00:26:41,000
Environment Secretary
Sarah Givens.
502
00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:45,800
Sarah, budget, tax
breaks, fracking.
503
00:26:45,800 --> 00:26:47,800
Justify.
504
00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:49,200
And no fob-off!
505
00:26:52,600 --> 00:26:55,800
Could you please put me through
to Richard Finch's office?
506
00:26:55,800 --> 00:26:57,900
My name's Bridget Jones.
507
00:26:58,800 --> 00:27:01,200
Yeah. I'll hold. Thanks.
508
00:27:17,200 --> 00:27:19,600
Billy, I want to
watch SpongeBob.
509
00:27:20,900 --> 00:27:22,200
Billy, come off that, please.
510
00:27:22,300 --> 00:27:23,900
You've had your screen time.
511
00:27:24,800 --> 00:27:26,700
One, two...
512
00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:28,200
But, Mummy, it's Sunday.
513
00:27:28,200 --> 00:27:29,100
No.
514
00:27:29,100 --> 00:27:30,200
Can I watch SpongeBob?
515
00:27:30,200 --> 00:27:32,900
May I watch SpongeBob.
516
00:27:32,900 --> 00:27:34,500
Yes?
517
00:27:34,500 --> 00:27:36,700
No, you've got to say,
"may I," not "can I."
518
00:27:36,800 --> 00:27:37,900
May I watch SpongeBob?
519
00:27:37,900 --> 00:27:40,500
- No.
- But, Mummy!
520
00:27:40,600 --> 00:27:42,100
No, no, no, no.
521
00:27:42,100 --> 00:27:44,800
No more screens, either of you.
522
00:27:44,800 --> 00:27:47,200
Screens have been proven to
shorten attention spans and...
523
00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:48,900
Ooh!
524
00:27:48,900 --> 00:27:50,700
No.
525
00:27:50,700 --> 00:27:52,900
Will you come and practise
cricket with me in the garden?
526
00:27:52,900 --> 00:27:55,500
Mummy really needs to work, darling.
Why don't you play with Mabel?
527
00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:58,500
She refuses to hit the ball. She
says she feels sorry for Ball-y.
528
00:27:58,500 --> 00:28:00,100
Ball-y.
529
00:28:00,100 --> 00:28:01,700
Darling, please go and
play cricket with Billy.
530
00:28:01,800 --> 00:28:03,700
I may not!
531
00:28:11,900 --> 00:28:15,800
Is it too much to ask to get some
bloody peace all by my bloody self
532
00:28:15,800 --> 00:28:17,700
for five bloody minutes?
533
00:28:17,800 --> 00:28:19,300
Internet's down!
534
00:28:19,300 --> 00:28:21,100
I want to
watch SpongeBob.
535
00:28:21,100 --> 00:28:23,200
Tell Billy it's my turn.
536
00:28:23,300 --> 00:28:27,000
- Mummy!
- I don't want to be a mummy right now.
537
00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:28,700
You had it for ages!
538
00:28:28,700 --> 00:28:31,200
I didn't even have
it today. It's my turn!
539
00:28:31,300 --> 00:28:32,800
Mummy!
540
00:28:32,900 --> 00:28:34,100
There's no Internet!
541
00:28:34,200 --> 00:28:37,000
I just want to sit down
542
00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:41,600
in echoing silence on
my own for one moment.
543
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:44,100
- Mummy! Mummy!
- Just shut up!
544
00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:56,000
Shark bait!
545
00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:57,200
Come and get it!
546
00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:00,600
Okay. You asked for it!
547
00:29:00,600 --> 00:29:01,800
Miranda?
548
00:29:01,900 --> 00:29:03,100
All right, Bridge?
549
00:29:03,200 --> 00:29:05,300
What're you doing here?
550
00:29:05,400 --> 00:29:08,600
So I was reading the
newspaper in Soho House
551
00:29:08,600 --> 00:29:12,900
and it was so, so
quiet, you know?
552
00:29:12,900 --> 00:29:15,300
I just miss all this.
553
00:29:15,300 --> 00:29:21,100
Off milk, stuff,
clutter, children, life.
554
00:29:21,100 --> 00:29:22,800
Plenty of that here.
555
00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:24,000
You don't have any champagne.
556
00:29:25,900 --> 00:29:29,100
always keep a cold
bottle of champagne
557
00:29:29,100 --> 00:29:31,100
in the fridge for emergencies.
558
00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:34,000
That's excellent advice.
559
00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:35,200
Cards on the table,
560
00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:38,700
I'm thinking of
unfreezing my eggs.
561
00:29:38,700 --> 00:29:41,800
Apparently, everyone
is going to Denmark
562
00:29:41,900 --> 00:29:43,000
to get sperm.
563
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:44,300
- Oh.
- Yeah.
564
00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:47,700
But I want what you
have. All of this.
565
00:29:47,800 --> 00:29:52,000
But Soho House and-and Sunday
papers and cold champagne...
566
00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:53,400
You're free, Bridge.
567
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:56,700
You're liberated from
the tyranny of this.
568
00:29:56,700 --> 00:29:59,900
Do you know how many
dating apps I use?
569
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:01,200
Could you look sexy?
570
00:30:01,200 --> 00:30:02,800
Well, I mean...
571
00:30:02,800 --> 00:30:06,200
I might still brush up
OK given enough time.
572
00:30:06,200 --> 00:30:07,700
No, I mean for this photo.
573
00:30:08,800 --> 00:30:10,000
I've set you up on Tinder.
574
00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:11,900
- What?
- You're welcome.
575
00:30:12,000 --> 00:30:14,200
- Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
- Well, I've popped you down as a widow.
576
00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:16,200
It's so much more
romantic and singular.
577
00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:19,100
We all agree it's what you need.
578
00:30:19,100 --> 00:30:21,700
What's Tinder?
579
00:30:21,700 --> 00:30:22,900
It's...
580
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:26,000
such a lovely day.
581
00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:29,700
Who wants to, um,
go to the heath?
582
00:30:29,700 --> 00:30:32,000
- No, I don't wanna go!
- No, SpongeBob!
583
00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:34,400
Oh, OK. That's no problem.
584
00:30:34,400 --> 00:30:35,900
Uh, sure.
585
00:30:35,900 --> 00:30:37,400
Um, you stay here,
586
00:30:37,500 --> 00:30:43,100
and I'll just, uh, take
these chocolate buttons. Ooh!
587
00:30:43,200 --> 00:30:46,400
- Let's go, nutters!
- Can't wait!
588
00:30:46,400 --> 00:30:48,800
Children and fresh air and
white chocolate buttons.
589
00:30:48,900 --> 00:30:51,300
I feel like Julie Andrews!
590
00:30:51,400 --> 00:30:53,200
Oh! I just got
matched with someone.
591
00:30:53,300 --> 00:30:55,000
Sorry, Mabel, could you
just get off, actually,
592
00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:56,300
'cause you're killing my back.
593
00:30:56,300 --> 00:31:00,200
Uh, he's on a street
corner... in a van.
594
00:31:02,500 --> 00:31:05,100
- He looks like Jason Statham...
- Mmm.
595
00:31:05,200 --> 00:31:06,900
...if you squint.
596
00:31:07,000 --> 00:31:08,300
In a bit, Bridge.
597
00:31:08,300 --> 00:31:09,900
Bye, kids. See you.
598
00:31:09,900 --> 00:31:11,400
- Bye!
- Bye.
599
00:31:17,100 --> 00:31:21,400
Oh, how everything calms
down once you're outside in blue skies
600
00:31:21,500 --> 00:31:25,100
turning the children
into biddable lemurs.
601
00:31:25,200 --> 00:31:29,200
Will obviously delete
Tinder immediately.
602
00:31:29,300 --> 00:31:31,400
But perhaps a very
quick look first.
603
00:31:37,500 --> 00:31:38,500
Keith?
604
00:31:39,300 --> 00:31:41,300
Who are you, Keith?
605
00:31:43,900 --> 00:31:48,200
Feel suddenly exposed to
whole new world hiding in plain sight
606
00:31:48,200 --> 00:31:50,100
like Narnia through
back of wardrobe,
607
00:31:50,100 --> 00:31:52,800
but with lion and
witch shagging.
608
00:31:52,900 --> 00:31:55,700
Mummy! Mabel's
stuck up the tree!
609
00:31:55,800 --> 00:31:57,900
- How'd she get up there?
- Mummy!
610
00:31:57,900 --> 00:31:58,900
Coming!
611
00:32:03,800 --> 00:32:04,400
Okay.
612
00:32:04,500 --> 00:32:06,900
No, it's... it's all right.
613
00:32:06,900 --> 00:32:09,900
- I can't get down either.
- It's all right. I'm here.
614
00:32:11,100 --> 00:32:12,200
Uh.
615
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:14,200
Billy. Is that you?
616
00:32:14,200 --> 00:32:16,300
Oh, no. It's Mr Walliker.
617
00:32:16,300 --> 00:32:18,200
Everything all right, Mrs Darcy?
618
00:32:18,300 --> 00:32:21,100
Yep. Super.
619
00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:22,800
Just climbing a tree.
620
00:32:22,800 --> 00:32:24,800
I can see that.
621
00:32:24,800 --> 00:32:25,500
Having fun?
622
00:32:25,500 --> 00:32:28,000
Yes. Yeah, this is really fun.
623
00:32:30,600 --> 00:32:32,900
- You sure you don't need a hand?
- No, no.
624
00:32:33,000 --> 00:32:34,500
As Einstein said,
625
00:32:34,500 --> 00:32:38,000
"What goes up must come down."
626
00:32:38,000 --> 00:32:39,800
- Newton.
- Yes.
627
00:32:39,900 --> 00:32:42,000
Newton.
628
00:32:42,000 --> 00:32:43,300
We're going to die!
629
00:32:43,400 --> 00:32:46,000
No, we're not going to
die. We're having fun.
630
00:32:46,000 --> 00:32:48,200
We are
definitely going to die.
631
00:32:48,300 --> 00:32:50,500
Clearly you've got
this nicely in hand.
632
00:32:51,500 --> 00:32:53,500
Look, there's a policeman.
633
00:32:57,100 --> 00:32:58,400
Oh, my God.
634
00:32:58,500 --> 00:33:00,800
I've climbed a magical man tree.
635
00:33:01,900 --> 00:33:03,000
- Are you stuck?
- Yes!
636
00:33:03,100 --> 00:33:04,800
No.
637
00:33:04,900 --> 00:33:07,300
- Do they need help?
- Apparently not.
638
00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:11,000
So, I'll... I'll be off then.
639
00:33:11,600 --> 00:33:12,800
Bye-bye.
640
00:33:16,100 --> 00:33:18,100
Okay. I'll be off too.
641
00:33:18,200 --> 00:33:20,300
Don't go away.
642
00:33:20,300 --> 00:33:22,400
No, seriously.
Don't go away.
643
00:33:22,400 --> 00:33:25,000
Hang on. I'm coming.
644
00:33:26,100 --> 00:33:27,200
Okay. Coming up.
645
00:33:30,000 --> 00:33:31,000
Uh...
646
00:33:31,100 --> 00:33:32,900
Hello.
647
00:33:32,900 --> 00:33:34,800
Okay,
just... Hang on.
648
00:33:40,000 --> 00:33:40,900
Hello.
649
00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:42,100
Hi, mate.
650
00:33:42,200 --> 00:33:43,400
- Hi, what's your name?
- Mabel.
651
00:33:43,500 --> 00:33:45,600
- Mabel.
- I can't jump down.
652
00:33:46,600 --> 00:33:49,100
Okay. Well, you sit down there.
653
00:33:49,100 --> 00:33:51,900
You get comfy, and I'm gonna go
down there and catch you, OK?
654
00:33:53,600 --> 00:33:55,200
- Okay, you ready?
- Yeah.
655
00:33:55,200 --> 00:33:57,100
Three, two, one, go!
656
00:33:57,100 --> 00:34:00,000
- I did it!
- I've got you. Well done.
657
00:34:00,100 --> 00:34:01,600
All right, big man. Your turn.
658
00:34:01,600 --> 00:34:04,500
Okay. You got this,
mate. There we go.
659
00:34:04,500 --> 00:34:05,900
- Next foot.
- That's it, darling.
660
00:34:05,900 --> 00:34:08,200
And
I've got you.
661
00:34:08,200 --> 00:34:10,000
Okay, Mum.
662
00:34:10,000 --> 00:34:11,300
Okay.
663
00:34:11,300 --> 00:34:12,400
There we go.
664
00:34:12,400 --> 00:34:14,000
- Okay.
- Okay.
665
00:34:16,300 --> 00:34:17,900
- You all right?
- Yes.
666
00:34:18,900 --> 00:34:20,400
Yes.
667
00:34:21,100 --> 00:34:22,400
Okay.
668
00:34:23,400 --> 00:34:24,400
Thank you.
669
00:34:26,300 --> 00:34:27,900
Thank you.
670
00:34:28,000 --> 00:34:29,000
It's all right.
671
00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:33,100
Uh, I'm Roxby. But you
can call me Roxster.
672
00:34:34,200 --> 00:34:35,300
Bridget Jones.
673
00:34:35,300 --> 00:34:37,000
But you can call her Mummy.
674
00:34:37,100 --> 00:34:39,100
Hmm. Okay.
675
00:34:40,000 --> 00:34:41,000
Oh.
676
00:34:42,500 --> 00:34:43,600
I think this is yours.
677
00:34:46,200 --> 00:34:47,400
Thanks.
678
00:34:49,300 --> 00:34:50,600
Anything else I can help with?
679
00:34:50,600 --> 00:34:52,100
God, yes.
680
00:34:52,100 --> 00:34:53,100
No.
681
00:34:54,200 --> 00:34:55,600
Okay.
682
00:34:55,600 --> 00:34:58,000
It's nice to meet
you, Roxy.
683
00:34:58,500 --> 00:34:59,700
It's Roxster.
684
00:35:02,100 --> 00:35:04,700
You too, Bridget Jones.
685
00:35:11,100 --> 00:35:14,000
Now obsessed
with tree-rescuing Adonis
686
00:35:14,000 --> 00:35:18,300
and reentering world of flirting
simultaneously with workforce.
687
00:35:18,400 --> 00:35:21,300
- Mrs Darcy.
- Mr Walliker.
688
00:35:21,300 --> 00:35:25,100
Weapon at the ready,
I see.
689
00:35:25,100 --> 00:35:28,400
Good to see you managed to
extricate yourself from that tree.
690
00:35:28,500 --> 00:35:31,000
Oh, yes. It's the
children's favourite game.
691
00:35:31,000 --> 00:35:35,100
We're completely obsessed with the
outdoors in our house.
692
00:35:35,100 --> 00:35:38,100
Well, I'll have to put you down for
our Outward Bound trip next term.
693
00:35:38,100 --> 00:35:39,500
Sounds like it'd be
right up your street.
694
00:35:39,600 --> 00:35:41,200
Fucking fuck.
695
00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:43,300
Yeah. Good.
696
00:35:43,300 --> 00:35:46,100
Do you have my slime? I
promised I'd show Cosmata.
697
00:35:48,100 --> 00:35:49,200
Oh.
698
00:35:51,700 --> 00:35:53,100
Hey, those are mine.
699
00:35:53,100 --> 00:35:54,500
Give them to me.
700
00:35:56,700 --> 00:36:00,200
They are actually hers.
701
00:36:00,200 --> 00:36:01,200
Well, in that case...
702
00:36:05,700 --> 00:36:07,500
Bridget!
703
00:36:07,500 --> 00:36:09,200
You're dressed properly.
704
00:36:10,000 --> 00:36:11,300
Odd.
705
00:36:11,300 --> 00:36:13,200
Heading to a meeting.
706
00:36:13,200 --> 00:36:15,600
Thinking about going
back to my old job.
707
00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:18,600
Oh, a job. Oh, I'll put
you down for Jobs Day then.
708
00:36:18,700 --> 00:36:20,400
Fucking
fuckety fuck fuck.
709
00:36:20,500 --> 00:36:22,800
Yes, absolutely.
710
00:36:22,800 --> 00:36:25,700
Celestine,
merci. C'est gentil.
711
00:36:25,700 --> 00:36:28,200
Actually, do you mind
tidying this up a little bit?
712
00:36:28,200 --> 00:36:29,700
Sure.
713
00:36:29,700 --> 00:36:31,500
Uh, what about the children?
Do you have a nanny?
714
00:36:31,500 --> 00:36:32,800
Not yet.
715
00:36:32,800 --> 00:36:35,500
Oh, I've got the perfect
person. She's excellent.
716
00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:37,600
She's very pretty, but that
doesn't matter, Bridget,
717
00:36:37,600 --> 00:36:39,700
because you don't
have a husband,
718
00:36:39,700 --> 00:36:42,600
so it's absolutely immaterial how
pretty and perfect she is.
719
00:36:42,600 --> 00:36:44,700
- Sounds good.
- There we go.
720
00:36:44,800 --> 00:36:47,200
- Francesca.
- Sorry.
721
00:36:47,200 --> 00:36:48,500
Wonderful.
722
00:36:48,500 --> 00:36:50,600
It's nothing. I just
threw it together.
723
00:36:50,600 --> 00:36:52,100
Ah.
724
00:36:52,200 --> 00:36:54,100
Bridget? Your donation?
725
00:36:54,600 --> 00:36:56,200
You didn't forget?
726
00:36:56,200 --> 00:36:58,700
No.
727
00:36:58,700 --> 00:37:01,600
Certainly not.
728
00:37:01,600 --> 00:37:04,600
Uh, let's see.
729
00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:06,100
Here we are.
730
00:37:07,600 --> 00:37:09,300
Hummus.
731
00:37:09,300 --> 00:37:10,800
And, uh...
732
00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:18,500
Rice cakes.
733
00:37:18,500 --> 00:37:22,400
And look, they've even
been opened already.
734
00:37:23,700 --> 00:37:25,800
Lovely.
735
00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:29,400
Ah. Her name's Chloe, and
she'll be with you at 6:30.
736
00:37:30,500 --> 00:37:32,200
Raef! India! Get inside.
737
00:37:32,300 --> 00:37:33,700
That's enough chatting.
738
00:37:35,500 --> 00:37:36,800
Bridget Jones.
739
00:37:37,600 --> 00:37:38,800
Thank you.
740
00:38:10,600 --> 00:38:12,100
Four.
741
00:38:12,100 --> 00:38:13,100
Four.
742
00:38:27,500 --> 00:38:30,500
- Three.
- Three.
743
00:38:30,500 --> 00:38:32,400
Thank you.
744
00:38:34,600 --> 00:38:36,200
This is
Bridget Jones about to
745
00:38:36,300 --> 00:38:39,800
go into an actual
in-person meeting.
746
00:38:41,700 --> 00:38:44,200
- Brenda Jones?
- Oh, actually, it's...
747
00:38:44,300 --> 00:38:46,900
Bridget Jones, there you are.
Excellent. Quick, come with me.
748
00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:49,200
- Thank you, Lizzie.
- Thanks.
749
00:38:50,600 --> 00:38:52,600
Good to see ya.
How have you been?
750
00:38:53,800 --> 00:38:55,600
You look hot.
751
00:38:55,600 --> 00:38:57,900
Oh. Thank you,
Richard.
752
00:38:57,900 --> 00:39:01,200
But I think you'll find that sort
of language is a little outmoded
753
00:39:01,300 --> 00:39:03,500
- in the workplace.
- No, I mean flustered.
754
00:39:03,500 --> 00:39:05,200
Are you going through
the, uh, you know?
755
00:39:07,700 --> 00:39:10,900
Bridget, let me
introduce you to Talitha.
756
00:39:10,900 --> 00:39:14,500
Richard, what am I
supposed to do with this, huh?
757
00:39:14,500 --> 00:39:16,300
Does it climb? Does
it stand on one leg?
758
00:39:16,400 --> 00:39:18,900
Does it do cartwheels? It's a
tortoise. It doesn't do anything.
759
00:39:18,900 --> 00:39:21,400
He can't pull out.
Who the fuck does he think he is?
760
00:39:21,400 --> 00:39:23,400
Arrogant, self-important prick.
761
00:39:23,500 --> 00:39:26,700
Tell that selfish arsehole
he can rot in hell.
762
00:39:26,700 --> 00:39:28,600
The Dalai Lama's cancelled.
763
00:39:28,600 --> 00:39:30,600
Twat. Shit.
764
00:39:30,700 --> 00:39:33,700
Okay, we've got an
hour till we're on air.
765
00:39:33,800 --> 00:39:35,500
We need a replacement.
Let me make a call.
766
00:39:35,500 --> 00:39:36,800
I do Krav Maga with Fergie.
767
00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:38,600
Duchess or Black Eyed Pea?
768
00:39:38,600 --> 00:39:40,600
Duchess. She could
be here in 45.
769
00:39:40,700 --> 00:39:44,500
Talitha, meet Bridget Jones.
Best producer we've ever had.
770
00:39:44,500 --> 00:39:45,600
Oh.
771
00:39:45,600 --> 00:39:47,300
I'm sure you're very good too.
772
00:39:47,400 --> 00:39:48,500
Huge fan.
773
00:39:48,500 --> 00:39:49,700
Hold this.
774
00:39:49,800 --> 00:39:51,600
Loved your early
work from Chechnya.
775
00:39:51,700 --> 00:39:55,300
Now I'm doing features
on incontinent tortoises.
776
00:39:55,300 --> 00:39:56,500
Fergie.
777
00:39:56,600 --> 00:39:58,300
Are those glutes burning up?
778
00:39:58,400 --> 00:39:58,900
Hello.
779
00:39:59,000 --> 00:40:01,400
- Hey. Sorry.
- Right.
780
00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:04,800
Uh, right. Let's get rid
of this set, please, now!
781
00:40:04,800 --> 00:40:06,800
So, what do you think?
782
00:40:06,800 --> 00:40:08,500
Can we lure you back?
783
00:40:08,600 --> 00:40:10,500
Fergie's in.
784
00:40:10,600 --> 00:40:13,800
Does anyone know how to get
tortoise piss out of silk?
785
00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:16,400
Blotting and mild detergent.
786
00:40:17,400 --> 00:40:18,700
When can I start?
787
00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:23,800
Am rejoining
ranks of London's employed
788
00:40:23,900 --> 00:40:27,600
and meaningfully
contributing to society.
789
00:40:27,600 --> 00:40:32,400
Can walk with head held high and
be role model for Billy and Mabel,
790
00:40:32,500 --> 00:40:37,000
saving them from otherwise certain
future as alcoholic wards of the state.
791
00:40:39,400 --> 00:40:42,400
It's super that the
television's invited you back.
792
00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:44,800
Of course, I always stayed
at home when you were little.
793
00:40:44,800 --> 00:40:45,800
Classic Mum.
794
00:40:45,800 --> 00:40:47,400
Can't really talk, Mum.
795
00:40:47,500 --> 00:40:49,600
I've got to tidy up before
the nanny gets here.
796
00:40:49,600 --> 00:40:51,000
A nanny? Really?
797
00:40:51,000 --> 00:40:54,600
Mummy doesn't love
us anymore. Ow!
798
00:40:54,600 --> 00:40:57,500
Ever since Mum and
Una moved into Audsley House,
799
00:40:57,500 --> 00:41:00,000
the retirement home we
have to pretend is a hotel,
800
00:41:00,100 --> 00:41:01,900
the phone calls
have been the same.
801
00:41:01,900 --> 00:41:04,500
Any men on the
horizon, Bridget?
802
00:41:04,600 --> 00:41:07,600
Well, there's got to be someone.
Some people don't mind a widow.
803
00:41:07,700 --> 00:41:09,300
Stings a bit.
804
00:41:09,400 --> 00:41:11,300
Beggars can't
be choosers, Bridget.
805
00:41:11,400 --> 00:41:14,400
And now, look, we're
in the hotel kitchen
806
00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:17,000
doing salmon in the sous vide.
807
00:41:17,100 --> 00:41:19,400
I mean, it's basically
boil-in-the-bag,
808
00:41:19,400 --> 00:41:21,700
but everybody's
doing it these days.
809
00:41:21,800 --> 00:41:24,300
Roxster.
Definite development.
810
00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:25,900
Cooking's never
really been your thing.
811
00:41:25,900 --> 00:41:28,500
Oh, must go. Bye, Mum!
812
00:41:28,500 --> 00:41:29,500
Bye, bye.
813
00:41:29,600 --> 00:41:30,900
Oh, God, it's her.
814
00:41:33,700 --> 00:41:35,300
Hi, I'm Chloe.
815
00:41:36,500 --> 00:41:37,500
Hello.
816
00:41:38,900 --> 00:41:40,700
What the actual fuck?
817
00:41:40,800 --> 00:41:43,400
She looks like a film star.
818
00:41:43,400 --> 00:41:44,900
Chloe, this is Mabel.
819
00:41:44,900 --> 00:41:47,700
Look, I can play the
recorder with my nose.
820
00:41:49,500 --> 00:41:51,800
Children, this is Chloe.
821
00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:53,800
She's going to come and
help with everything.
822
00:41:53,800 --> 00:41:55,600
Nicolette mentioned it
would be a challenge,
823
00:41:55,700 --> 00:41:57,800
- but I've certainly seen worse.
- Oh.
824
00:41:57,800 --> 00:42:00,700
Oh, and this is Billy,
the science genius.
825
00:42:00,800 --> 00:42:04,600
Ooh, we mustn't pigeonhole
children. It adds undue pressure.
826
00:42:04,700 --> 00:42:06,800
Have you read How To
Raise a Self-Driven Child?
827
00:42:06,800 --> 00:42:08,400
Oh, yes. It's-It's on my list,
828
00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:11,700
so do not spoil the
ending.
829
00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:13,500
Oh, not to worry, Billy.
830
00:42:13,500 --> 00:42:15,400
It's not about the result.
It's about the journey.
831
00:42:15,500 --> 00:42:17,700
There's something to learn
whether you get an A or a C.
832
00:42:17,800 --> 00:42:21,100
Billy has
never had a C in...
833
00:42:22,200 --> 00:42:22,900
Who did this?
834
00:42:22,900 --> 00:42:24,900
Mr Walliker.
835
00:42:25,000 --> 00:42:28,500
I drew the earth and the atmosphere,
and I put heaven over the top.
836
00:42:28,500 --> 00:42:31,600
And Mr Walliker said that heaven
was a religious construct.
837
00:42:31,700 --> 00:42:32,900
And he gave me a C.
838
00:42:33,000 --> 00:42:35,000
Well, Mr Walliker
839
00:42:35,000 --> 00:42:37,700
is a whistle-obsessed fascist
840
00:42:37,800 --> 00:42:41,000
with all the soul
of a non-stick wok.
841
00:42:41,000 --> 00:42:43,400
Where did you hide
the chocolate digestives?
842
00:42:43,500 --> 00:42:46,000
I didn't hide...
843
00:42:47,600 --> 00:42:48,600
...anything.
844
00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:52,900
Well, plenty to do here.
845
00:42:54,800 --> 00:42:57,400
♪ If my body was a boat Could
you steer that, sailor? ♪
846
00:42:57,500 --> 00:43:00,800
♪ Make it feel Like it's a
1960s Hollywood trailer... ♪
847
00:43:00,900 --> 00:43:04,600
Consumed with guilt
re hideously perfect nanny,
848
00:43:04,600 --> 00:43:07,100
who children will obviously come
to love more than hopeless mother
849
00:43:07,100 --> 00:43:09,000
without film star hair.
850
00:43:09,000 --> 00:43:11,700
♪ Ooh, it's what I
need Yes, 'cause ♪
851
00:43:11,700 --> 00:43:15,900
♪ I could love you ♪
852
00:43:15,900 --> 00:43:20,600
♪ If I really wanted to ♪
853
00:43:20,600 --> 00:43:24,000
♪ You could be Be
my glass of wine ♪
854
00:43:24,000 --> 00:43:26,700
♪ When the sun set Help
me exhale all the excess ♪
855
00:43:26,700 --> 00:43:30,200
♪ Baby, bae, b-b-bae
B-b-baby, would you ♪
856
00:43:30,200 --> 00:43:32,700
♪ Would you make it all
right? ♪ -
857
00:43:32,700 --> 00:43:34,000
♪ Or maybe that much better? ♪
858
00:43:34,100 --> 00:43:35,700
♪ If you wanted
You could make it ♪
859
00:43:35,800 --> 00:43:37,900
♪ All worth it, worth
it Worth it, worth it ♪
860
00:43:37,900 --> 00:43:42,900
♪ Ooh, when I see the sun rising
You make it that much better ♪
861
00:43:42,900 --> 00:43:45,700
♪ So I hope you're gonna make
it All worth it, worth it... ♪
862
00:43:45,800 --> 00:43:49,200
And texting Roxster
slowly became part of my life.
863
00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:53,200
A relationship with no
necessity for actually meeting,
864
00:43:53,300 --> 00:43:57,600
or arrangements, or sex,
or any real life at all.
865
00:43:57,600 --> 00:44:01,700
In other words, the perfect relationship.
866
00:44:01,800 --> 00:44:04,100
Is that the tree Adonis?
867
00:44:04,900 --> 00:44:07,100
Wait a minute.
868
00:44:07,200 --> 00:44:10,600
You wrote to him, "How
are you liking Tinder?"
869
00:44:10,600 --> 00:44:13,000
Inoffensive,
neutral, a bit dull.
870
00:44:13,100 --> 00:44:16,900
He replied, "Don't know, only joined
it to find you, Bridget Jones."
871
00:44:18,000 --> 00:44:20,200
- Shag him now.
- Mm-mmm.
872
00:44:20,200 --> 00:44:23,000
Then he sent a smiley emoji
873
00:44:23,100 --> 00:44:27,000
and then you responded
with the flag of Greece,
874
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:30,700
an abacus and a duck.
875
00:44:33,800 --> 00:44:34,900
I panicked.
876
00:44:34,900 --> 00:44:36,100
Thank you.
877
00:44:36,200 --> 00:44:38,100
Who's next?
878
00:44:38,100 --> 00:44:40,800
Do you want to go for a drink?
879
00:44:40,900 --> 00:44:43,100
I'm so flattered.
880
00:44:43,100 --> 00:44:45,600
Um, but I've got a boyfriend.
881
00:44:45,600 --> 00:44:49,500
Well, sort of got a
boyfriend. I think.
882
00:44:49,600 --> 00:44:52,800
Um, so nice of you
to ask, but, um...
883
00:44:54,100 --> 00:44:56,100
no, thank you.
884
00:44:56,200 --> 00:44:58,600
No, it's part of the meal deal.
885
00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:03,100
Well, this one's easy.
886
00:45:03,100 --> 00:45:05,900
You absolutely
must go. Obviously.
887
00:45:05,900 --> 00:45:09,300
But we've been texting for so
long now. I can't meet him.
888
00:45:09,300 --> 00:45:11,200
I mean, maybe it's like
in Jane Austen's day
889
00:45:11,200 --> 00:45:13,000
when they did letter writing
for months and months
890
00:45:13,100 --> 00:45:14,700
and then suddenly
just got married.
891
00:45:14,700 --> 00:45:17,900
Bridget, sexting a man
that you just met in a park
892
00:45:18,000 --> 00:45:19,700
is nothing like
Jane Austen's day.
893
00:45:19,700 --> 00:45:22,600
- If you don't shag him, I will.
- I can't.
894
00:45:22,600 --> 00:45:25,900
There is no possibility of being naked
with a man at this point in my life.
895
00:45:26,000 --> 00:45:28,200
You just need a little rebrand.
896
00:45:28,200 --> 00:45:29,900
You'll start by getting a slip.
897
00:45:29,900 --> 00:45:31,700
- A slip?
- Yeah, with a slip,
898
00:45:31,700 --> 00:45:34,100
you can show off your arms,
your legs, your décolletage,
899
00:45:34,200 --> 00:45:35,800
which are always the last to go.
900
00:45:35,800 --> 00:45:37,300
And keep the central area,
901
00:45:37,300 --> 00:45:40,200
which one might want to
gloss over, glossed over.
902
00:45:40,200 --> 00:45:41,700
And get a Brazilian.
903
00:45:41,800 --> 00:45:43,200
God, no.
904
00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:45,000
I like a bit of
coverage down there.
905
00:45:45,000 --> 00:45:46,900
Or run a comb
through it at least.
906
00:45:46,900 --> 00:45:49,000
But also, do get a Brazilian.
907
00:45:49,000 --> 00:45:50,800
Just dust it. Dust it down.
908
00:45:51,700 --> 00:45:53,200
Okay, I'll go!
909
00:45:53,200 --> 00:45:56,000
But I'm not going
to sleep with him.
910
00:45:57,700 --> 00:45:59,900
Are condoms
meant to be coloured?
911
00:45:59,900 --> 00:46:01,900
Is hypersensitive good?
912
00:46:01,900 --> 00:46:04,200
Large? Small? Oh.
913
00:46:04,300 --> 00:46:07,700
Maybe just purchase a
representative selection.
914
00:46:16,000 --> 00:46:17,100
Regular.
915
00:46:18,800 --> 00:46:20,200
Mmm, exotic flavours.
916
00:46:22,900 --> 00:46:24,000
Thin feel.
917
00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:27,600
Extra-large.
918
00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:30,300
Pleasure Me.
919
00:46:32,200 --> 00:46:34,200
Lube.
920
00:46:35,400 --> 00:46:37,100
Pleasure Me again.
921
00:46:46,800 --> 00:46:48,800
Enjoy your weekend, Mrs Darcy.
922
00:46:57,800 --> 00:46:59,700
Hello, old friend.
923
00:47:07,900 --> 00:47:08,900
Hmm.
924
00:47:10,400 --> 00:47:11,700
Thanks for
having the kids tonight.
925
00:47:11,700 --> 00:47:13,200
Always a pleasure,
never a chore.
926
00:47:13,200 --> 00:47:14,700
I'll take them to
school in the morning.
927
00:47:14,700 --> 00:47:18,700
So you can stay out
as late as you want.
928
00:47:18,700 --> 00:47:20,800
Make up for four
years of no shagging.
929
00:47:20,800 --> 00:47:22,200
It's only a drink.
930
00:47:24,900 --> 00:47:26,700
Too see-through?
931
00:47:26,800 --> 00:47:29,000
Mmm. Definitely.
932
00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:30,200
OK.
933
00:47:31,700 --> 00:47:32,800
How about this?
934
00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:37,000
OK.
935
00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:39,200
The reality suddenly
completely terrifying,
936
00:47:39,300 --> 00:47:41,100
and Mark, and insane and flabby.
937
00:47:41,100 --> 00:47:42,400
And oh, God, oh, God.
938
00:47:42,400 --> 00:47:43,700
I can't.
939
00:47:43,800 --> 00:47:45,700
- I really can't.
- Oh. What? What?
940
00:47:45,800 --> 00:47:48,800
- No, I just can't.
- Aw. Hey, you can.
941
00:47:48,800 --> 00:47:52,800
You just need to think of it as
widening your circle of friends.
942
00:47:52,900 --> 00:47:53,900
That's all.
943
00:47:55,000 --> 00:47:56,700
Hmm?
944
00:47:56,700 --> 00:47:58,000
Come on.
945
00:47:58,000 --> 00:48:00,100
Put on the dress,
get out of here
946
00:48:00,100 --> 00:48:02,300
and widen your fucking circle.
947
00:48:21,500 --> 00:48:23,400
Oh, God. Look at him.
948
00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:25,400
What if he's perfect?
949
00:48:34,900 --> 00:48:35,900
Hello.
950
00:48:35,900 --> 00:48:36,900
Hi.
951
00:48:39,000 --> 00:48:42,900
There's a really great place around
here that's been here for forever.
952
00:48:42,900 --> 00:48:44,300
Do you know this area at all?
953
00:48:44,300 --> 00:48:47,300
Mmm, I used to.
954
00:48:47,400 --> 00:48:50,900
Yeah, the, uh, Heath Ranger
thing is just a day job.
955
00:48:51,000 --> 00:48:53,800
And my real passion is garbage.
956
00:48:56,000 --> 00:48:57,200
Really?
957
00:48:57,200 --> 00:49:00,800
The technical term
is garbologist.
958
00:49:00,800 --> 00:49:04,100
I'm a biochemist.
Studying to be one.
959
00:49:04,200 --> 00:49:05,900
You're a student.
960
00:49:05,900 --> 00:49:08,100
A late-in-life
one, anyway. Yeah.
961
00:49:08,100 --> 00:49:10,100
How late?
962
00:49:10,100 --> 00:49:11,300
I'm 28.
963
00:49:12,300 --> 00:49:13,900
I'm just kidding.
964
00:49:13,900 --> 00:49:15,200
I'm 29.
965
00:49:15,800 --> 00:49:17,400
Fuck.
966
00:49:17,400 --> 00:49:20,100
Is he closer in age
to me or to Billy?
967
00:49:20,100 --> 00:49:21,300
What about you?
968
00:49:22,600 --> 00:49:24,000
You are...
969
00:49:24,000 --> 00:49:26,100
Slightly older.
970
00:49:26,100 --> 00:49:29,200
I'm gonna say 35-ish.
971
00:49:29,300 --> 00:49:30,800
Yes.
972
00:49:30,900 --> 00:49:31,900
Bull's-eye.
973
00:49:33,000 --> 00:49:34,400
Let's say 35.
974
00:49:34,400 --> 00:49:35,900
- Mmm. Thirty-five it is.
- Mm-hmm.
975
00:49:37,900 --> 00:49:39,400
Is 35 all right?
976
00:49:39,400 --> 00:49:41,300
I think older women,
977
00:49:41,300 --> 00:49:44,100
ever so slightly older women,
978
00:49:45,300 --> 00:49:46,800
have a wiser view on life.
979
00:49:46,900 --> 00:49:49,100
You know, they're
more experienced
980
00:49:49,100 --> 00:49:52,400
and more emotionally mature.
981
00:49:52,400 --> 00:49:54,300
Me in a nutshell.
982
00:49:54,300 --> 00:49:57,300
I find that very attractive.
983
00:50:20,000 --> 00:50:23,900
Oh, God. I have no idea
how any of this works anymore.
984
00:50:25,400 --> 00:50:27,300
Is it all right if I kiss you?
985
00:50:30,400 --> 00:50:33,500
Aw. The
generation who ask.
986
00:50:33,500 --> 00:50:35,800
I think that would
be acceptable.
987
00:51:27,100 --> 00:51:29,200
Give me just one moment.
988
00:51:40,300 --> 00:51:42,300
Oh, my God.
989
00:51:43,900 --> 00:51:45,500
What are you doing?
990
00:52:09,300 --> 00:52:12,400
♪ Put your hand down, boy ♪
991
00:52:12,500 --> 00:52:15,600
♪ Welcome to my zoo ♪
992
00:52:15,600 --> 00:52:19,200
♪ Put your head inside My
big, black wild while ♪
993
00:52:19,200 --> 00:52:22,300
♪ I can still help you ♪
994
00:52:22,400 --> 00:52:25,400
♪ See the snake-baboon ♪
995
00:52:25,500 --> 00:52:28,600
♪ Funky, chic and smooth ♪
996
00:52:28,600 --> 00:52:32,300
♪ Honey, can you spy
The divine ape-swine ♪
997
00:52:32,300 --> 00:52:36,600
♪ 'Cause he can see you ♪
998
00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:41,300
I...
999
00:52:41,400 --> 00:52:42,500
You all right?
1000
00:52:42,500 --> 00:52:43,900
Yeah. It's just...
1001
00:52:46,000 --> 00:52:47,200
Yeah. Okay.
1002
00:52:48,200 --> 00:52:49,400
Wow. It's really tight.
1003
00:52:53,000 --> 00:52:56,900
♪ I'm a man I'm a twisted fool ♪
1004
00:52:57,000 --> 00:53:00,200
♪ My hands are twisted, too... ♪
1005
00:53:02,100 --> 00:53:04,400
♪ I am
an animal... ♪ -Oh, God.
1006
00:53:04,500 --> 00:53:06,900
♪ ...that starts with E ♪
1007
00:53:07,000 --> 00:53:08,200
- Mabel's.
- Ah.
1008
00:53:09,400 --> 00:53:10,600
♪ I'm a man ♪
1009
00:53:10,600 --> 00:53:13,400
♪ I'm a twisted fool ♪
1010
00:53:13,500 --> 00:53:16,600
♪ My hands are twisted too ♪
1011
00:53:16,600 --> 00:53:19,100
♪ Five fingers
Two black hooves ♪
1012
00:53:19,100 --> 00:53:20,400
You make me so hard, baby.
1013
00:53:20,400 --> 00:53:23,200
You make me hard.
1014
00:53:25,000 --> 00:53:26,100
What?
1015
00:53:27,400 --> 00:53:29,600
♪ Got toes and I can smile ♪
1016
00:53:29,600 --> 00:53:34,700
♪ I'm crooked but upright ♪
1017
00:54:04,700 --> 00:54:07,000
How did that happen?
I'm using protection.
1018
00:54:09,500 --> 00:54:15,400
♪ La, la, la, la Whoo ♪
1019
00:54:15,400 --> 00:54:17,300
♪ I'm so nine-to-five ♪
1020
00:54:17,400 --> 00:54:18,700
- Hi, Bridge.
- Morning.
1021
00:54:18,700 --> 00:54:20,400
I've got coffee and
I've got Ricky Gervais's
1022
00:54:20,400 --> 00:54:22,400
requests for today's show.
1023
00:54:22,400 --> 00:54:24,500
- Seriously?
- Yeah.
1024
00:54:24,500 --> 00:54:26,400
- It's big.
- Yeah.
1025
00:54:26,500 --> 00:54:28,700
- A relaxation corner.
- Uh-huh.
1026
00:54:28,700 --> 00:54:31,000
Three full-length mirrors.
1027
00:54:31,100 --> 00:54:34,100
And he'll only use La
Mer for some reason?
1028
00:54:34,100 --> 00:54:35,600
I know.
1029
00:54:35,600 --> 00:54:38,200
- Ooh. Three, please.
- Three.
1030
00:54:38,200 --> 00:54:40,100
Did you have sex last night?
1031
00:54:40,100 --> 00:54:42,300
What? No.
1032
00:54:42,300 --> 00:54:43,700
♪ Won't you take a hold of me ♪
1033
00:54:43,700 --> 00:54:46,300
Sam! Ricky Gervais
is on his way in.
1034
00:54:46,300 --> 00:54:49,200
And, apparently, he won't drink
Evian, only Icelandic water.
1035
00:54:49,200 --> 00:54:51,500
And it's got to have
lots of alkalines.
1036
00:54:52,400 --> 00:54:53,700
Or no alkalines.
1037
00:54:54,400 --> 00:54:55,600
Um...
1038
00:54:56,600 --> 00:54:58,300
Did you have sex last night?
1039
00:54:58,400 --> 00:55:00,300
What? No!
1040
00:55:00,300 --> 00:55:02,200
♪ La, la, la, la ♪
1041
00:55:02,200 --> 00:55:03,700
God!
1042
00:55:03,800 --> 00:55:06,200
Tape measure, please. Quick.
1043
00:55:06,200 --> 00:55:11,400
The cushion can't be more than 40
centimetres from the floor for Ricky.
1044
00:55:11,400 --> 00:55:13,100
Did you have sex last night?
1045
00:55:16,100 --> 00:55:19,600
Yes. I
did. Okay? I did.
1046
00:55:19,600 --> 00:55:24,500
I had a full night of
utterly mind-blowing sex
1047
00:55:24,600 --> 00:55:29,400
with a tree-rescuing rubbish expert Adonis
who might be slightly younger, probably.
1048
00:55:29,500 --> 00:55:33,400
And it was amazing!
1049
00:55:33,400 --> 00:55:35,100
Okay?
1050
00:55:35,100 --> 00:55:36,800
So what?
1051
00:55:45,300 --> 00:55:48,500
♪ Lost in romance ♪
1052
00:55:48,500 --> 00:55:51,100
♪ Let's just dance, ooh ♪
1053
00:55:51,100 --> 00:55:53,200
♪ Shake it till the
pearls Get lost ♪
1054
00:55:53,300 --> 00:55:55,200
♪ La, la, la, la ♪
1055
00:55:55,300 --> 00:55:57,400
Am not only
mother and sexual being,
1056
00:55:57,400 --> 00:56:00,600
but also capable working
woman at the top of her game.
1057
00:56:00,700 --> 00:56:02,700
So take that, Chloe.
1058
00:56:02,700 --> 00:56:06,100
I've done the macaroni and cheese,
but with butternut squash instead.
1059
00:56:06,200 --> 00:56:08,600
It's in the bottom oven. Just needs to
move to the top in about 20 minutes.
1060
00:56:08,700 --> 00:56:10,800
Good. Good. Right.
1061
00:56:10,800 --> 00:56:13,200
It's just how I would do it.
1062
00:56:13,300 --> 00:56:14,700
Um... Oh, Chloe,
1063
00:56:14,700 --> 00:56:16,900
uh, it would be really helpful
1064
00:56:16,900 --> 00:56:19,300
to have their water bottles
done the night before.
1065
00:56:19,300 --> 00:56:20,800
In the fridge. Top right.
1066
00:56:20,800 --> 00:56:22,400
Where the expired milk was.
1067
00:56:22,400 --> 00:56:26,100
Oh, great. Great. Um...
1068
00:56:26,200 --> 00:56:29,400
Billy will need something
extra for snack tomorrow.
1069
00:56:29,400 --> 00:56:31,300
- He's got...
- Cricket, yeah.
1070
00:56:31,300 --> 00:56:33,400
In a snack bag. Labelled.
By the bread bin.
1071
00:56:33,500 --> 00:56:36,200
- We have a bread bin?
- I have to leave, I'm afraid.
1072
00:56:36,200 --> 00:56:38,200
Graham and I have
tai chi on Thursdays.
1073
00:56:38,200 --> 00:56:40,700
6:45 sharp, but earlier
to get the spot you want.
1074
00:56:40,700 --> 00:56:42,700
Oh. 'Course.
1075
00:56:42,700 --> 00:56:45,300
You and Graham
enjoy your tai chi.
1076
00:56:45,300 --> 00:56:47,800
Oh, you forgot to leave
out Billy's cricket things,
1077
00:56:47,900 --> 00:56:49,300
but never mind. I'll do it.
1078
00:56:49,400 --> 00:56:50,800
Bag packed by the door.
1079
00:56:55,500 --> 00:56:56,900
Nevertheless,
1080
00:56:56,900 --> 00:57:00,300
secret to calmer,
happier parenting:
1081
00:57:00,300 --> 00:57:02,300
one-night stands.
1082
00:57:03,700 --> 00:57:07,200
Although, it wasn't
just one night.
1083
00:57:08,800 --> 00:57:10,200
Brought a pie.
1084
00:57:11,300 --> 00:57:12,600
Hmm.
1085
00:57:18,700 --> 00:57:20,400
That was funny.
1086
00:57:20,400 --> 00:57:23,200
And so, a
moment turned into a date,
1087
00:57:24,400 --> 00:57:26,100
which turned into a kiss.
1088
00:57:27,800 --> 00:57:29,900
Which turned into a night.
1089
00:57:30,800 --> 00:57:33,200
♪ Ooh ♪
1090
00:57:34,400 --> 00:57:39,300
♪ What a wonderful thing... ♪
1091
00:57:39,400 --> 00:57:42,800
And the night
turned into a summer.
1092
00:57:44,700 --> 00:57:47,900
♪ I can see You
standing there now ♪
1093
00:57:49,600 --> 00:57:51,600
♪ And you're The
prettiest thing ♪
1094
00:57:51,700 --> 00:57:53,700
♪ In the crowd ♪
1095
00:57:55,300 --> 00:58:01,900
♪ And guess who Be
laughing loud, but me ♪
1096
00:58:03,400 --> 00:58:07,700
♪ You made me see the love ♪
1097
00:58:08,700 --> 00:58:12,500
♪ That you're giving me ♪
1098
00:58:12,500 --> 00:58:14,500
♪ Baby... ♪
1099
00:58:15,700 --> 00:58:18,000
♪ Won't you hold my hand? ♪
1100
00:58:19,100 --> 00:58:23,700
♪ Just let me know
that I'm your man ♪
1101
00:58:23,800 --> 00:58:27,600
♪ And show I'm not ashamed ♪
1102
00:58:27,600 --> 00:58:30,400
♪ I walk the floor ♪
1103
00:58:30,400 --> 00:58:34,500
♪ When you leave me ♪
1104
00:58:35,800 --> 00:58:38,000
♪ Hey, baby ♪
1105
00:58:39,400 --> 00:58:42,000
♪ I don't know about you ♪
1106
00:58:43,900 --> 00:58:47,900
♪ Let me tell you
what I'm gonna do ♪
1107
00:58:49,100 --> 00:58:54,400
♪ I'm gonna try to make
My dreams come true ♪
1108
00:58:54,400 --> 00:58:56,900
♪ With you ♪
1109
00:58:56,900 --> 00:58:58,600
Morning. Welcome back.
1110
00:58:58,600 --> 00:59:00,700
- Good morning, Mr Walliker.
- Morning.
1111
00:59:00,800 --> 00:59:02,600
- Morning.
- Mrs Darcy.
1112
00:59:02,600 --> 00:59:03,600
How were your summer holidays?
1113
00:59:03,700 --> 00:59:04,800
I have a new daddy now.
1114
00:59:04,800 --> 00:59:06,000
His name is Roxster,
1115
00:59:06,000 --> 00:59:07,700
and he always gives Mummy
1116
00:59:07,700 --> 00:59:09,300
a funny hairstyle
in the morning.
1117
00:59:09,400 --> 00:59:11,500
Yes, well. It's not that
funny, is it, Mabel?
1118
00:59:11,500 --> 00:59:13,000
It is.
1119
00:59:13,000 --> 00:59:15,900
He's not a new daddy.
He's just someone.
1120
00:59:17,900 --> 00:59:18,900
Off you go.
1121
00:59:20,800 --> 00:59:22,500
Well, it seems
congratulations are in order.
1122
00:59:24,400 --> 00:59:25,900
You!
1123
00:59:25,900 --> 00:59:28,000
- No. You two. Come on.
- Bye, Mum. See you soon. Bye.
1124
00:59:28,100 --> 00:59:29,700
Bisous,
bisous, bisous.
1125
00:59:29,800 --> 00:59:32,500
Bridget, I emailed you
from Anguilla about, um...
1126
00:59:32,500 --> 00:59:35,500
Jobs Day, yes. I come prepared.
1127
00:59:35,500 --> 00:59:39,900
I must say, it's a welcome
change, all... this.
1128
00:59:40,900 --> 00:59:42,300
Thank you.
1129
00:59:45,900 --> 00:59:47,900
All right,
everyone. Settle down.
1130
00:59:47,900 --> 00:59:49,700
Settle down. Thank you.
1131
00:59:49,800 --> 00:59:51,500
Um, so...
1132
00:59:51,500 --> 00:59:54,800
Last term, Daveed's dad was
kind enough to talk to us
1133
00:59:54,900 --> 00:59:56,700
about being a thoracic surgeon,
1134
00:59:56,700 --> 00:59:59,000
and next week,
Eugenie's mum will be in
1135
00:59:59,000 --> 01:00:01,900
to talk about her role
as a nuclear physicist,
1136
01:00:01,900 --> 01:00:04,100
and how it felt to
win the Nobel Prize.
1137
01:00:04,100 --> 01:00:07,500
But today, it's Billy's mum.
1138
01:00:07,500 --> 01:00:10,600
So, everyone, give a warm
welcome to Mrs Darcy.
1139
01:00:15,500 --> 01:00:16,500
Hello.
1140
01:00:19,500 --> 01:00:20,800
Um.
1141
01:00:20,800 --> 01:00:24,400
I am a television producer.
1142
01:00:24,400 --> 01:00:28,500
My mum says television
is making society rot.
1143
01:00:28,600 --> 01:00:30,100
Yes. Well, thank you, Priscilla.
1144
01:00:30,100 --> 01:00:33,500
OK. May
we have a volunteer?
1145
01:00:34,500 --> 01:00:36,400
Thank you, Esmeralda.
1146
01:00:44,100 --> 01:00:45,400
Right.
1147
01:00:45,400 --> 01:00:48,600
You can stand here.
1148
01:00:48,600 --> 01:00:49,800
Very good.
1149
01:00:49,900 --> 01:00:52,700
And you are going
to say things like,
1150
01:00:52,700 --> 01:00:54,900
"Ten seconds to air!"
1151
01:00:55,000 --> 01:00:59,100
And I am going to be the
interviewer for the day.
1152
01:01:00,500 --> 01:01:01,600
Now...
1153
01:01:05,500 --> 01:01:06,500
Just...
1154
01:01:08,000 --> 01:01:11,400
Right. OK.
1155
01:01:11,400 --> 01:01:16,100
Perhaps Mr Walliker could be
the person being interviewed.
1156
01:01:17,600 --> 01:01:18,600
Take a seat.
1157
01:01:19,600 --> 01:01:21,600
Uh, righto.
1158
01:01:21,600 --> 01:01:23,500
Now, topic.
1159
01:01:25,600 --> 01:01:28,900
The life cycle of the fruit fly. Hmm?
1160
01:01:28,900 --> 01:01:30,100
Right, OK.
1161
01:01:32,100 --> 01:01:35,400
Ooh. Ten seconds to air!
1162
01:01:36,800 --> 01:01:38,600
Hello, this is Bridget Jones,
1163
01:01:38,600 --> 01:01:42,400
and I'm delighted to have Mr
Walliker on the show today
1164
01:01:42,500 --> 01:01:46,500
to help us understand the
life cycle of the fruit fly.
1165
01:01:46,600 --> 01:01:48,100
Um, well, it's a...
1166
01:01:48,100 --> 01:01:49,900
it's a pleasure
to be on the show.
1167
01:01:49,900 --> 01:01:52,600
And, um, thank you
for that question.
1168
01:01:52,700 --> 01:01:53,900
Um...
1169
01:01:54,000 --> 01:01:55,900
Well, the, uh, the average...
1170
01:01:57,600 --> 01:01:58,700
Thank you.
1171
01:01:58,800 --> 01:02:00,700
Uh, the average fly takes about
1172
01:02:00,700 --> 01:02:02,000
two weeks to mature
1173
01:02:02,000 --> 01:02:05,700
and can live for as
long as 40 or 50 days.
1174
01:02:05,800 --> 01:02:09,500
And then, like all living things,
when it dies, it simply stops.
1175
01:02:09,500 --> 01:02:10,700
Cellular shutdown.
1176
01:02:10,700 --> 01:02:12,800
It falls, gradually decomposes,
1177
01:02:12,900 --> 01:02:14,900
and becomes part
of the soil system.
1178
01:02:14,900 --> 01:02:16,900
But does it really
end when it dies?
1179
01:02:18,900 --> 01:02:21,000
Exactly, Mr Walliker.
1180
01:02:21,000 --> 01:02:23,700
Surely there's
more to the story.
1181
01:02:25,100 --> 01:02:29,100
Um, well. Well, not really.
1182
01:02:30,000 --> 01:02:32,100
But, yes.
1183
01:02:32,200 --> 01:02:37,000
After the body of the
fruit fly stops working,
1184
01:02:37,000 --> 01:02:39,900
uh, then the soul
of the fruit fly
1185
01:02:40,000 --> 01:02:42,900
will be able to be free, yes?
1186
01:02:42,900 --> 01:02:45,100
And that particular fruit fly
1187
01:02:45,100 --> 01:02:49,000
will always, in some
senses, be with us.
1188
01:02:52,800 --> 01:02:55,800
- The soul of the fruit fly?
- Hmm.
1189
01:02:55,800 --> 01:02:57,300
There's no evidence for a soul,
1190
01:02:57,300 --> 01:03:01,600
but the body is a perfect
system of electrical pulses,
1191
01:03:01,600 --> 01:03:04,200
powered by the heart,
which is in itself
1192
01:03:04,200 --> 01:03:07,100
- a pump, if you will...
- The soul, Mr Walliker,
1193
01:03:07,200 --> 01:03:10,100
is the essence of
every living thing.
1194
01:03:10,100 --> 01:03:12,500
If you think we're
simply bits of machinery
1195
01:03:12,600 --> 01:03:14,100
that can be switched on or off,
1196
01:03:14,200 --> 01:03:16,000
then where does art come from?
1197
01:03:16,000 --> 01:03:18,800
Or-Or wonder? Or poetry?
1198
01:03:18,800 --> 01:03:20,200
- Or magic?
- Magic?
1199
01:03:20,200 --> 01:03:22,000
The fruit fly, when it dies,
1200
01:03:22,000 --> 01:03:24,900
will stay with its fruit
fly family forever.
1201
01:03:25,000 --> 01:03:27,600
Keep the interview
on point, Bridget.
1202
01:03:27,700 --> 01:03:29,300
This
is utter nonsense.
1203
01:03:29,300 --> 01:03:33,100
Our world is governed
by laws and fact.
1204
01:03:33,200 --> 01:03:34,900
That's our universe.
1205
01:03:35,000 --> 01:03:36,800
- And it is rational.
- Cut!
1206
01:03:36,900 --> 01:03:38,800
I'm a realist, Mrs Darcy.
1207
01:03:38,900 --> 01:03:40,800
I believe in what's real.
1208
01:03:40,800 --> 01:03:42,000
Cut!
1209
01:03:43,200 --> 01:03:45,600
Off to
Talitha's birthday.
1210
01:03:45,600 --> 01:03:48,100
Are you sure you're
OK to stay tonight?
1211
01:03:48,200 --> 01:03:51,100
It's Thursday. I thought
you and Graham had tai chi.
1212
01:03:51,200 --> 01:03:53,800
Won't kill him to
miss a week, will it?
1213
01:03:53,800 --> 01:03:55,600
He's so uptight.
1214
01:03:57,200 --> 01:03:59,600
Oh, you look nice, Bridget.
1215
01:03:59,600 --> 01:04:01,100
Oh!
1216
01:04:01,200 --> 01:04:03,300
Ooh.
1217
01:04:04,600 --> 01:04:05,600
Oh, try this.
1218
01:04:12,600 --> 01:04:13,900
There.
1219
01:04:13,900 --> 01:04:15,200
Thanks, Chloe.
1220
01:04:18,000 --> 01:04:20,700
Billy! Mabes!
Snacks on the table.
1221
01:04:24,900 --> 01:04:28,200
So where is he?
Is he not coming?
1222
01:04:28,200 --> 01:04:30,900
Oh, it's fine. He must
have been held up.
1223
01:04:30,900 --> 01:04:33,600
- What? By some sort of rubbish emergency?
- Oh.
1224
01:04:33,700 --> 01:04:35,700
- Probably had to finish his homework.
- Stop it.
1225
01:04:35,700 --> 01:04:37,200
Hope he gets here
before story time.
1226
01:04:37,200 --> 01:04:39,000
Shut it!
1227
01:04:39,100 --> 01:04:40,900
Come the fuck on, Bridge.
1228
01:04:41,000 --> 01:04:42,400
Does this guy actually exist
1229
01:04:42,400 --> 01:04:45,000
or is it, um, like that one time
1230
01:04:45,000 --> 01:04:46,600
that you saw Brad
Pitt at Costa Coffee?
1231
01:04:46,600 --> 01:04:49,200
- It was him. It was.
- Come on. Really?
1232
01:04:49,200 --> 01:04:50,900
- Happy birthday.
- Lovely to see you.
1233
01:04:50,900 --> 01:04:53,000
What on earth are you holding?
1234
01:04:53,000 --> 01:04:54,800
Oh, Petula.
1235
01:04:54,800 --> 01:04:56,100
A present to myself
1236
01:04:56,100 --> 01:04:58,600
and I already prefer
her to any human.
1237
01:04:58,700 --> 01:05:00,000
Oh, hi.
1238
01:05:00,000 --> 01:05:01,200
♪ Happy
birthday to you ♪
1239
01:05:01,300 --> 01:05:03,300
Oh, here. Can you hold my baby
1240
01:05:03,300 --> 01:05:05,100
while I feign
surprise at the cake
1241
01:05:05,100 --> 01:05:07,900
that I chose and
bought for myself.
1242
01:05:07,900 --> 01:05:09,900
Oh, look! Look at that!
1243
01:05:09,900 --> 01:05:12,100
♪ Happy birthday, dear Talitha ♪
1244
01:05:12,100 --> 01:05:14,000
Thank you. Oh, look.
1245
01:05:14,100 --> 01:05:19,100
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
1246
01:05:23,800 --> 01:05:25,100
Thank you.
1247
01:05:25,100 --> 01:05:29,200
Thank you all so
much for coming today
1248
01:05:29,200 --> 01:05:32,800
to help me celebrate, well, me.
1249
01:05:34,100 --> 01:05:35,400
We love you, Talitha.
1250
01:05:35,500 --> 01:05:37,600
- Talitha!
- Talitha! Happy birthday.
1251
01:05:39,100 --> 01:05:41,000
Beep, beep. Beep, beep.
1252
01:05:41,000 --> 01:05:43,100
Binko Carruthers.
1253
01:05:43,100 --> 01:05:45,100
Oh, please don't come
over. Please don't.
1254
01:05:45,100 --> 01:05:46,400
Beep, beep.
1255
01:05:46,400 --> 01:05:50,200
There she is. The
famous Bridget Jones.
1256
01:05:50,200 --> 01:05:53,200
So I told Cosmo I'd
take you out for a spin.
1257
01:05:53,300 --> 01:05:54,200
How's Friday?
1258
01:05:56,200 --> 01:05:58,700
Fuck, no!
1259
01:05:58,800 --> 01:06:01,900
Jude, get in there. Come on, get
the fuck in there! God, help!
1260
01:06:01,900 --> 01:06:03,900
Oh, my God. Oh!
1261
01:06:03,900 --> 01:06:06,200
- Petula, come on, darling.
- Petula! Petula!
1262
01:06:07,300 --> 01:06:09,400
♪ I'm mad about the boy ♪
1263
01:06:12,300 --> 01:06:14,400
♪ And I know it's stupid ♪
1264
01:06:14,400 --> 01:06:17,300
♪ To be mad about the boy ♪
1265
01:06:17,300 --> 01:06:19,100
Who's that?
1266
01:06:19,100 --> 01:06:21,300
♪ I'm so ashamed of it ♪
1267
01:06:21,300 --> 01:06:26,300
♪ But must admit The
sleepless nights I've had ♪
1268
01:06:28,000 --> 01:06:29,400
♪ About the boy ♪
1269
01:06:32,900 --> 01:06:35,100
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
1270
01:06:35,100 --> 01:06:36,800
♪ On the silver screen... ♪
1271
01:06:39,800 --> 01:06:44,000
♪ He melts my foolish heart
In every single scene ♪
1272
01:06:46,100 --> 01:06:49,100
♪ Although I'm quite aware... ♪
1273
01:06:49,200 --> 01:06:51,100
♪ That here and
there Are traces... ♪
1274
01:06:51,200 --> 01:06:53,200
- I think this belongs to you.
- Thank you.
1275
01:06:54,100 --> 01:06:58,800
♪ About the boy ♪
1276
01:07:01,500 --> 01:07:07,300
♪ Lord knows I'm
not a fool girl ♪
1277
01:07:09,200 --> 01:07:10,500
- Hello.
- Hi.
1278
01:07:10,500 --> 01:07:12,400
♪ I really shouldn't care ♪
1279
01:07:16,300 --> 01:07:20,300
♪ Lord knows I'm
not a school girl ♪
1280
01:07:21,500 --> 01:07:24,200
♪ Who's in the flurry... ♪
1281
01:07:24,200 --> 01:07:26,000
Sorry I'm late. Buses
were a nightmare.
1282
01:07:26,000 --> 01:07:27,200
It's fine.
1283
01:07:29,400 --> 01:07:31,000
Oh, I'm so sorry.
1284
01:07:31,000 --> 01:07:33,200
She just jumped out of my arms.
1285
01:07:33,300 --> 01:07:36,000
Do not apologise.
1286
01:07:36,000 --> 01:07:37,800
Oh, my darling.
1287
01:07:37,800 --> 01:07:39,500
Let me help you out
of those wet clothes.
1288
01:07:39,500 --> 01:07:41,600
No. Don't you dare redress him.
1289
01:07:41,600 --> 01:07:44,300
- You look gorgeous.
- You look gorgeous.
1290
01:07:44,300 --> 01:07:47,800
♪ All because I'm mad ♪
1291
01:07:48,900 --> 01:07:54,300
♪ About the boy ♪
1292
01:07:54,300 --> 01:07:58,500
Now that, my darling, is
what I call a rebrand.
1293
01:08:00,300 --> 01:08:02,400
Hi. I'm Roxster.
1294
01:08:20,000 --> 01:08:24,200
♪ We've come a long
Long way together ♪
1295
01:08:24,300 --> 01:08:26,300
I hope he's up to it, darling.
1296
01:08:26,400 --> 01:08:28,800
♪ Through the hard
times And the good ♪
1297
01:08:28,900 --> 01:08:33,300
♪ I have to celebrate you Baby ♪
1298
01:08:33,300 --> 01:08:37,500
♪ I have to praise
you like I should ♪
1299
01:08:37,600 --> 01:08:39,800
♪ I have to praise you ♪
1300
01:08:42,200 --> 01:08:44,000
♪ I have to praise you ♪
1301
01:08:46,500 --> 01:08:48,400
♪ I have to praise you ♪
1302
01:08:48,400 --> 01:08:50,900
- Hello.
- Oh, fuck off.
1303
01:08:50,900 --> 01:08:55,100
♪ I have to praise
you like I should ♪
1304
01:08:55,200 --> 01:08:57,000
♪ I have to praise you ♪
1305
01:09:04,100 --> 01:09:05,900
♪ I have to praise you ♪
1306
01:09:11,000 --> 01:09:16,400
♪ I want a little
sugar In my bowl ♪
1307
01:09:16,400 --> 01:09:18,000
If there is a God,
1308
01:09:18,100 --> 01:09:20,500
I'm sure he had more
to deal with that night
1309
01:09:20,500 --> 01:09:22,600
than my personal happiness,
1310
01:09:22,700 --> 01:09:26,500
but it did feel like he'd taken
the night off everything else
1311
01:09:26,500 --> 01:09:28,400
to focus on me.
1312
01:09:30,500 --> 01:09:32,600
But then...
1313
01:09:32,600 --> 01:09:34,500
I wish I had a time machine.
1314
01:09:34,500 --> 01:09:36,400
♪ Feel so funny ♪
1315
01:09:36,400 --> 01:09:41,400
♪ I feel so sad ♪
1316
01:09:41,400 --> 01:09:42,600
♪ What's the matter, baby? ♪
1317
01:09:42,600 --> 01:09:44,300
A time machine.
1318
01:09:44,300 --> 01:09:46,700
♪ Come on, save my soul ♪
1319
01:09:46,700 --> 01:09:49,100
In his moment
of inebriated joy,
1320
01:09:49,200 --> 01:09:51,400
he had given himself away.
1321
01:09:55,300 --> 01:09:57,200
♪ In my bowl ♪
1322
01:09:57,200 --> 01:09:59,000
It mattered to him.
1323
01:09:59,100 --> 01:10:04,100
And with that came the elephant
stomping heavily into the room.
1324
01:10:20,500 --> 01:10:22,700
♪ I try to discover... ♪
1325
01:10:22,700 --> 01:10:24,500
That happens
to us all, James.
1326
01:10:28,400 --> 01:10:30,700
Oh, I do have
about 60 naps a day.
1327
01:10:32,600 --> 01:10:36,200
Well, 60 in the morning
and a nap in the afternoon.
1328
01:10:36,300 --> 01:10:40,200
Yeah, but you've got so many
interesting characters in this show.
1329
01:10:40,300 --> 01:10:42,300
So this show is for...
1330
01:10:42,300 --> 01:10:43,600
Ghosting.
1331
01:10:43,700 --> 01:10:45,500
The practice of
ending a relationship
1332
01:10:45,500 --> 01:10:47,400
by suddenly and
without explanation
1333
01:10:47,400 --> 01:10:49,700
withdrawing from
all communication.
1334
01:10:51,400 --> 01:10:54,700
♪ That you give me No
reason why you... ♪
1335
01:10:54,700 --> 01:10:58,600
The slow unveiling
of reality and rejection.
1336
01:10:58,600 --> 01:11:00,700
♪ That you give me no
That you give me no ♪
1337
01:11:00,700 --> 01:11:03,500
♪ That you give me no
That you give me no... ♪
1338
01:11:03,500 --> 01:11:05,200
The casual cruelty.
1339
01:11:06,500 --> 01:11:10,600
♪ I hear you calling ♪
1340
01:11:11,800 --> 01:11:15,700
♪ Oh, baby, please... ♪
1341
01:11:17,700 --> 01:11:22,000
♪ Give a little respect ♪
1342
01:11:22,100 --> 01:11:28,400
♪ To me ♪
1343
01:11:28,500 --> 01:11:31,100
♪ What religion or reason ♪
1344
01:11:31,100 --> 01:11:35,200
♪ Could cause a man To
forsake his lover? ♪
1345
01:11:35,300 --> 01:11:36,700
♪ Don't you tell me no... ♪
1346
01:11:36,800 --> 01:11:38,800
Do not
text when ghosted.
1347
01:11:38,800 --> 01:11:42,500
♪ Don't you tell
me no Soul... ♪
1348
01:11:42,500 --> 01:11:44,700
Do not
text when drunk.
1349
01:11:44,800 --> 01:11:47,800
♪ I hear you calling ♪
1350
01:11:48,800 --> 01:11:54,100
♪ Oh, baby, please ♪
1351
01:11:55,200 --> 01:11:59,100
♪ Give a little respect ♪
1352
01:11:59,100 --> 01:12:03,600
♪ To me ♪
1353
01:12:13,400 --> 01:12:14,800
Ghost the bastard back, Bridget.
1354
01:12:14,900 --> 01:12:17,700
Just let him disintegrate
into nothingness.
1355
01:12:17,700 --> 01:12:19,600
It can be a jungle out there.
1356
01:12:19,600 --> 01:12:22,100
Yep. And I'm the giant panda,
1357
01:12:22,200 --> 01:12:25,500
sexually obsolete and
destined to be alone forever.
1358
01:12:25,500 --> 01:12:28,800
No. You will adapt and
survive like we all do.
1359
01:12:28,800 --> 01:12:32,200
I used to be on the cover of
Vanity Fairin a flak jacket.
1360
01:12:32,200 --> 01:12:35,300
And now I'm on the cover of
Good Housekeepingwith a pavlova.
1361
01:12:35,300 --> 01:12:36,300
Cathy...
1362
01:12:37,500 --> 01:12:39,200
where's your special stuff?
1363
01:12:40,600 --> 01:12:43,100
HD TV was an
extinction-level event
1364
01:12:43,200 --> 01:12:46,300
for the fearless career
television presenter.
1365
01:12:46,400 --> 01:12:50,100
I'm about to usher you
into your next chapter.
1366
01:12:50,200 --> 01:12:53,500
Lip serum. I
get it on the dark web.
1367
01:12:53,500 --> 01:12:55,900
- Is it legal?
- Absolutely.
1368
01:12:55,900 --> 01:12:57,200
In Venezuela.
1369
01:12:57,700 --> 01:12:58,800
Here, take it.
1370
01:13:02,300 --> 01:13:05,800
Adapt and survive.
1371
01:13:07,600 --> 01:13:10,200
Adapt and survive.
1372
01:13:11,900 --> 01:13:14,600
Ooh. Something's
definitely happening.
1373
01:13:14,700 --> 01:13:18,400
It's either disastrous
or totally fantastic.
1374
01:13:18,500 --> 01:13:19,800
Mummy!
1375
01:13:21,500 --> 01:13:23,200
Hi, sweetie.
1376
01:13:23,200 --> 01:13:24,800
Shit. What's
happening to my voice?
1377
01:13:24,900 --> 01:13:26,500
Mabel's shoes are
on the wrong feet.
1378
01:13:26,500 --> 01:13:28,400
No. My feet are
on the wrong legs.
1379
01:13:30,200 --> 01:13:31,900
Silly thing.
1380
01:13:31,900 --> 01:13:34,900
Mummy, something's
wrong with your mouth.
1381
01:13:35,800 --> 01:13:36,700
No.
1382
01:13:36,800 --> 01:13:38,300
No, there isn't.
1383
01:13:38,400 --> 01:13:40,200
Yes, there is. Look.
1384
01:13:40,200 --> 01:13:42,200
Your lips are all
funny right there.
1385
01:13:42,200 --> 01:13:44,500
Darling,
don't be ridiculous.
1386
01:13:44,500 --> 01:13:48,200
All right, Mabel, let's get
these swapped over, shall we?
1387
01:13:49,300 --> 01:13:50,800
Out we pop. All right.
1388
01:13:50,900 --> 01:13:54,500
I wouldn't do that again
if I were you, Mrs Darcy.
1389
01:13:54,600 --> 01:13:55,900
You looked all
right to begin with.
1390
01:13:57,500 --> 01:13:58,800
All right.
1391
01:13:58,800 --> 01:14:01,500
You're
trying to look younger
1392
01:14:01,600 --> 01:14:06,900
and the effects have marked similarities
to those of an elderly stroke victim.
1393
01:14:08,800 --> 01:14:11,600
You're actually drooling now.
1394
01:14:14,400 --> 01:14:15,800
Oh, dear.
1395
01:14:15,800 --> 01:14:18,700
Now, acutely aware as
I am of my waiting room
1396
01:14:18,700 --> 01:14:21,800
filled to capacity
with actual patients...
1397
01:14:21,800 --> 01:14:23,900
not to mention the fact
that I am a gynaecologist
1398
01:14:24,000 --> 01:14:26,300
and that particular
set of lips is,
1399
01:14:26,300 --> 01:14:29,300
as it were, broadly
speaking, at the wrong end...
1400
01:14:29,300 --> 01:14:32,300
I am nonetheless going
to ask you the question,
1401
01:14:32,900 --> 01:14:34,900
"Bridget, are you OK?"
1402
01:14:34,900 --> 01:14:37,700
A simple yes will suffice.
1403
01:14:39,000 --> 01:14:40,400
No.
1404
01:14:42,300 --> 01:14:43,900
It's all your fault.
1405
01:15:25,700 --> 01:15:28,500
"Twat." Sorry, it's
doctor's handwriting.
1406
01:15:28,500 --> 01:15:30,200
That's an A, in
the middle there.
1407
01:15:30,300 --> 01:15:34,900
Now, I rather
zoned out after "pyjamas",
1408
01:15:34,900 --> 01:15:37,900
but a toy boy is not the answer,
Bridget, and nor are big lips.
1409
01:15:39,200 --> 01:15:40,600
You're a widow
1410
01:15:40,600 --> 01:15:42,700
with two wonderful
children who adore you.
1411
01:15:42,700 --> 01:15:44,600
You're just trying to cope
with a shitty situation.
1412
01:15:44,600 --> 01:15:46,300
Embrace the chaos.
1413
01:15:47,800 --> 01:15:49,900
That's just a simple
allergic reaction to
1414
01:15:50,000 --> 01:15:53,500
hydroxymethoxyphenyl
propylmethylmethoxybenzofuran
1415
01:15:53,500 --> 01:15:57,200
in whatever infernal concoction
you've smeared on your mouth.
1416
01:15:57,300 --> 01:16:00,300
This is an antihistamine.
1417
01:16:00,300 --> 01:16:01,800
It'll work straight away.
1418
01:16:02,700 --> 01:16:04,900
It's for the lips.
1419
01:16:04,900 --> 01:16:07,900
They still haven't invented
anything for being a twat.
1420
01:16:20,900 --> 01:16:22,500
Hello.
1421
01:16:22,600 --> 01:16:24,200
Yes, this is Bridget.
1422
01:16:25,600 --> 01:16:27,900
Of course! Straight away.
1423
01:16:30,500 --> 01:16:31,700
Yes, yes.
1424
01:16:37,500 --> 01:16:38,500
Daniel.
1425
01:16:39,600 --> 01:16:42,000
Well, by all that's holy,
1426
01:16:42,000 --> 01:16:43,900
Bridget Jones.
1427
01:16:48,700 --> 01:16:50,700
Nice of you to come, Jones.
1428
01:16:50,800 --> 01:16:52,900
If I'd known, I'd have
worn a tinier nightie.
1429
01:16:54,400 --> 01:16:55,400
What happened?
1430
01:16:56,000 --> 01:16:57,600
My heart.
1431
01:16:57,700 --> 01:16:59,000
Two massive surprises.
1432
01:16:59,000 --> 01:17:01,700
One, I have one.
Two, it murmurs.
1433
01:17:01,700 --> 01:17:04,400
They've, um, had a
listen and I don't know.
1434
01:17:05,300 --> 01:17:06,700
Are you OK?
1435
01:17:06,700 --> 01:17:08,600
Well, I thought I was
having a heart attack.
1436
01:17:08,600 --> 01:17:11,000
My whole life passed
before my eyes.
1437
01:17:11,000 --> 01:17:12,700
You actually featured
prominently, Jones.
1438
01:17:12,700 --> 01:17:14,400
- Hmm.
- All the best bits.
1439
01:17:14,400 --> 01:17:15,900
Rome. Mini-break weekend.
1440
01:17:16,800 --> 01:17:19,000
Sodomy in Sainsbury's.
1441
01:17:20,600 --> 01:17:22,800
But, uh, mainly,
1442
01:17:22,900 --> 01:17:24,800
it was just me wandering
up and down the King's Road
1443
01:17:24,800 --> 01:17:26,500
trying to twinkle
at 20-year-olds.
1444
01:17:26,500 --> 01:17:28,000
Mmm.
1445
01:17:28,100 --> 01:17:32,800
Perhaps it's an opportunity
for a new beginning.
1446
01:17:32,900 --> 01:17:34,700
Brand-new Daniel.
1447
01:17:35,400 --> 01:17:36,400
Mmm.
1448
01:17:37,700 --> 01:17:40,400
I think I shall
stay right here...
1449
01:17:41,900 --> 01:17:43,500
until you agree.
1450
01:17:43,500 --> 01:17:45,500
Well that is kind of
you, Bridge, but, um...
1451
01:17:46,600 --> 01:17:47,900
they told me I don't have long.
1452
01:17:48,000 --> 01:17:50,700
- What?
- No, no, no. Fuck. No, not that.
1453
01:17:50,700 --> 01:17:52,900
Well, maybe that.
No, they, uh...
1454
01:17:53,000 --> 01:17:55,500
they're taking me for
some tests in a minute.
1455
01:17:59,400 --> 01:18:02,900
The question is, would we say
I've become a fraction tragic?
1456
01:18:03,000 --> 01:18:07,000
They asked me to put
down my next of kin.
1457
01:18:07,100 --> 01:18:11,800
And the only person I could think
of who might remotely care was you.
1458
01:18:13,800 --> 01:18:16,100
- That's very sweet.
- Yeah, but not deliberately.
1459
01:18:16,100 --> 01:18:18,000
The point is, Bridge,
how have I arrived
1460
01:18:18,100 --> 01:18:20,600
at this point in my
life with no kin?
1461
01:18:20,700 --> 01:18:23,800
How could I possibly be kinless?
1462
01:18:23,800 --> 01:18:27,000
But you're not.
You're not kinless.
1463
01:18:27,000 --> 01:18:30,400
Well, I haven't seen
Enzo since he was two.
1464
01:18:30,400 --> 01:18:33,000
And he is now being happily
raised by his mother
1465
01:18:33,100 --> 01:18:36,600
and an Italian aristocrat who
wears his jumper like a shawl.
1466
01:18:39,600 --> 01:18:41,000
So, lucky you, Jones.
1467
01:18:42,400 --> 01:18:44,400
Your two, the way
they look at you...
1468
01:18:46,600 --> 01:18:49,000
just makes one realise...
1469
01:18:51,700 --> 01:18:53,500
one's own fuck-ups, really.
1470
01:18:55,000 --> 01:18:56,900
The glory of what
might have been.
1471
01:19:01,700 --> 01:19:03,500
Did you know...
1472
01:19:05,000 --> 01:19:07,100
it was actually quite good
1473
01:19:07,200 --> 01:19:09,600
with Gisele at the
beginning?
1474
01:19:09,700 --> 01:19:11,400
I have to face the fact...
1475
01:19:13,000 --> 01:19:16,600
...that it may have
been, Jones, love.
1476
01:19:17,600 --> 01:19:19,500
The real thing.
1477
01:19:19,500 --> 01:19:21,700
I still don't know what she
was so pissed off about.
1478
01:19:21,700 --> 01:19:23,000
You shagged her sister.
1479
01:19:23,000 --> 01:19:25,700
Once. Massive overreaction.
1480
01:19:27,600 --> 01:19:30,800
God, I love you, Daniel.
1481
01:19:30,800 --> 01:19:35,000
Despite your really
quite impressive
1482
01:19:35,000 --> 01:19:38,600
lifelong dedication
to total fuckwittage.
1483
01:19:38,600 --> 01:19:40,400
Yeah.
1484
01:19:41,600 --> 01:19:43,600
There's a lot I don't know.
1485
01:19:44,600 --> 01:19:45,600
An awful lot.
1486
01:19:47,200 --> 01:19:50,900
But I do know that my children
would give anything at all
1487
01:19:51,000 --> 01:19:53,700
to have just one
day with their dad.
1488
01:20:02,600 --> 01:20:05,700
Time
for your obs, Mr Cleaver.
1489
01:20:05,700 --> 01:20:07,100
Oh, right.
1490
01:20:07,100 --> 01:20:09,100
And, again, there
is really no need
1491
01:20:09,200 --> 01:20:11,700
for you to remove your gown.
1492
01:20:11,800 --> 01:20:12,900
Sorry.
1493
01:20:12,900 --> 01:20:14,400
Okey-doke.
1494
01:20:14,500 --> 01:20:15,800
God.
1495
01:20:15,800 --> 01:20:19,000
Then lights down on
the cooking segment.
1496
01:20:19,000 --> 01:20:21,600
Why do I always have
to do the cooking bits?
1497
01:20:21,600 --> 01:20:24,000
That chestnut ravioli
he cooked last time
1498
01:20:24,100 --> 01:20:25,800
was the worst thing I've
ever put in my mouth.
1499
01:20:25,800 --> 01:20:27,500
I highly doubt that.
1500
01:20:27,500 --> 01:20:30,600
And then, Miranda, you
cross to the stage.
1501
01:20:30,600 --> 01:20:34,900
"And now, on Better Women, a
surprise guest." Blah blah.
1502
01:20:35,000 --> 01:20:36,800
And lights!
1503
01:20:37,900 --> 01:20:39,200
♪ Yeah, I'm a fighter ♪
1504
01:20:39,200 --> 01:20:41,100
♪ And I made it through ♪
1505
01:20:41,100 --> 01:20:42,800
♪ Solid gold
survivor That's... ♪
1506
01:20:42,900 --> 01:20:44,600
Hold it!
1507
01:20:44,600 --> 01:20:48,600
Linus, we've got to practise
following her with the lights.
1508
01:20:48,600 --> 01:20:50,200
So, uh...
1509
01:20:50,200 --> 01:20:53,100
maybe you could
dance a bit? Yeah?
1510
01:20:53,100 --> 01:20:55,700
- Uh...
- OK. Go, Linus!
1511
01:20:57,200 --> 01:20:59,000
♪ So give me light ♪
1512
01:20:59,000 --> 01:21:01,000
♪ You've got to find
Your own road... ♪
1513
01:21:01,000 --> 01:21:04,700
Can you hold that, please? See,
you've got to, you know, go for it.
1514
01:21:04,700 --> 01:21:05,900
♪ Help me see... ♪
1515
01:21:05,900 --> 01:21:07,900
'Cause she's going
to, you know...
1516
01:21:08,000 --> 01:21:10,000
♪ And no more light
And no more love ♪
1517
01:21:10,000 --> 01:21:12,000
♪ It's not over... ♪
1518
01:21:12,000 --> 01:21:14,100
♪ It's not over ♪
1519
01:21:14,100 --> 01:21:16,000
♪ I won't save you
when I'm weak ♪
1520
01:21:16,100 --> 01:21:17,800
♪ Only got so much
left To give ♪
1521
01:21:17,800 --> 01:21:20,500
♪ It's not over ♪
1522
01:21:20,600 --> 01:21:21,700
♪ It's not over ♪
1523
01:21:21,700 --> 01:21:23,100
♪ Till I'm done... ♪
1524
01:21:25,800 --> 01:21:27,200
♪ Till I'm done ♪
1525
01:21:28,800 --> 01:21:30,600
- See, Linus?
- Hi, B.
1526
01:21:32,100 --> 01:21:33,800
Oh, shit.
1527
01:21:35,700 --> 01:21:36,900
Brought a pie.
1528
01:21:39,600 --> 01:21:42,100
Sorry, they
just told me to come in.
1529
01:21:44,300 --> 01:21:46,700
You
disappeared, Roxster.
1530
01:21:46,700 --> 01:21:47,700
I know.
1531
01:21:48,300 --> 01:21:49,300
I know.
1532
01:21:52,800 --> 01:21:54,500
I panicked.
1533
01:21:56,100 --> 01:21:58,600
I got... I got
scared, and I ran.
1534
01:21:59,700 --> 01:22:01,600
But I want this.
1535
01:22:02,700 --> 01:22:03,700
You.
1536
01:22:05,100 --> 01:22:08,600
I thought I wasn't
ready, but I am.
1537
01:22:09,600 --> 01:22:11,300
I thought I...
1538
01:22:11,300 --> 01:22:13,700
I don't know, wanted
somebody my own age,
1539
01:22:13,700 --> 01:22:16,000
but I don't.
1540
01:22:20,200 --> 01:22:22,100
I love you, Bridget.
1541
01:22:25,900 --> 01:22:27,700
I'm ready for all of it.
1542
01:22:27,700 --> 01:22:29,600
For Billy and Mabel.
1543
01:22:30,700 --> 01:22:31,900
And burnt lasagne.
1544
01:22:31,900 --> 01:22:34,100
And slime.
1545
01:22:34,200 --> 01:22:36,300
And all of it.
1546
01:22:38,600 --> 01:22:40,300
I promise
you, I am ready.
1547
01:22:43,100 --> 01:22:45,200
I'm not
sure that matters.
1548
01:22:48,300 --> 01:22:50,300
What do you mean? I
don't... I don't understand.
1549
01:22:50,400 --> 01:22:53,200
You're so lovely,
1550
01:22:54,800 --> 01:22:56,900
and you're going to be
1551
01:22:56,900 --> 01:23:00,100
a brilliant partner and dad.
1552
01:23:00,100 --> 01:23:01,700
And you're going to discover
1553
01:23:01,700 --> 01:23:04,900
all sorts of garbage that
will change the world.
1554
01:23:04,900 --> 01:23:06,600
That's not how it works.
1555
01:23:06,700 --> 01:23:08,000
But not with me.
1556
01:23:13,800 --> 01:23:15,800
I wish I had a time machine too.
1557
01:23:17,900 --> 01:23:19,400
So you could catch up.
1558
01:23:23,200 --> 01:23:25,100
Are you... Are you sure?
1559
01:23:27,400 --> 01:23:28,700
I am.
1560
01:23:42,400 --> 01:23:44,100
I'll keep the pie, if that's OK.
1561
01:23:50,100 --> 01:23:51,300
Goodbye, Bridget.
1562
01:24:03,300 --> 01:24:05,200
Parents' evening.
1563
01:24:05,300 --> 01:24:08,400
Is there a worse night
for the single parent?
1564
01:24:09,400 --> 01:24:11,100
They call it parents' evening
1565
01:24:11,200 --> 01:24:13,400
as if it's a plural.
1566
01:24:13,400 --> 01:24:16,700
As if it's a given
that there's two of us.
1567
01:24:18,200 --> 01:24:21,300
Oh, well. Chin up and onward.
1568
01:24:21,300 --> 01:24:22,900
Mrs Darcy.
1569
01:24:24,300 --> 01:24:26,200
It's good to see you.
1570
01:24:26,300 --> 01:24:28,300
Good to be back in the studio.
1571
01:24:29,700 --> 01:24:32,700
The great
fruit fly debate.
1572
01:24:33,900 --> 01:24:35,000
Uh...
1573
01:24:35,100 --> 01:24:36,300
Small secret.
1574
01:24:36,400 --> 01:24:38,200
It was about 50 times
more interesting
1575
01:24:38,200 --> 01:24:40,300
than that bloody
thoracic surgeon.
1576
01:24:40,400 --> 01:24:42,100
And don't get me started
on the physicist.
1577
01:24:42,100 --> 01:24:45,800
I mean, they'll hand out
Nobels to anyone these days.
1578
01:24:45,800 --> 01:24:47,900
Oh, yeah.
1579
01:24:48,000 --> 01:24:50,900
So, uh, Billy.
1580
01:24:51,000 --> 01:24:53,800
Well, he's, um... he's
an excellent cricketer.
1581
01:24:53,900 --> 01:24:55,000
- Mm-hmm.
- You know,
1582
01:24:55,100 --> 01:24:56,500
he's a very good
young scientist.
1583
01:24:56,500 --> 01:24:58,800
He's... he's got a good brain.
1584
01:24:58,800 --> 01:25:03,200
He's methodical, his
experiments are well drawn up.
1585
01:25:03,300 --> 01:25:05,200
Look, I mean, it's just, uh...
1586
01:25:05,300 --> 01:25:07,300
it's excellent work all round.
1587
01:25:08,900 --> 01:25:12,200
- Good.
- It's just this, Mrs Darcy. I'm...
1588
01:25:13,400 --> 01:25:15,000
I'm a...
1589
01:25:15,100 --> 01:25:17,100
I'm a bit concerned about him.
1590
01:25:17,100 --> 01:25:20,300
Concerned? Concerned
how? What's he done?
1591
01:25:20,300 --> 01:25:23,000
No, he hasn't done
anything. He's, um...
1592
01:25:23,000 --> 01:25:24,700
He's just been a bit, uh...
1593
01:25:26,000 --> 01:25:27,300
withdrawn.
1594
01:25:28,100 --> 01:25:29,300
Why is he withdrawn?
1595
01:25:29,400 --> 01:25:31,400
Everything's been
all right at home?
1596
01:25:31,400 --> 01:25:34,300
Yes, yes. It's all fine.
1597
01:25:34,300 --> 01:25:36,400
Everything
OK with your, um...
1598
01:25:38,400 --> 01:25:40,000
hairdresser?
1599
01:25:40,100 --> 01:25:43,100
Him? No, but-but yes. Uh...
1600
01:25:43,100 --> 01:25:45,000
He's withdrawn?
1601
01:25:45,000 --> 01:25:48,000
Well, I don't mean to alarm you.
1602
01:25:48,100 --> 01:25:51,500
- Sorry about that. Yep, exactly.
- Mr Walliker, sorry, sorry.
1603
01:25:51,500 --> 01:25:54,200
We're a couple of minutes early,
but these sessions are so short.
1604
01:25:54,200 --> 01:25:56,500
And I have more than a
few questions for you.
1605
01:25:56,500 --> 01:25:58,100
You don't mind, do you, Bridget?
1606
01:25:58,100 --> 01:26:00,300
We do have the two boys, so...
1607
01:26:00,400 --> 01:26:03,400
Not at all. No.
That's... It's fine.
1608
01:26:05,600 --> 01:26:08,200
- Mate, I'm gonna have to put you on mute.
- Thank you.
1609
01:26:08,300 --> 01:26:10,500
- Right.
- I've got parents' evening.
1610
01:26:32,100 --> 01:26:33,900
Mark Darcy, the leading
1611
01:26:33,900 --> 01:26:36,500
international humanitarian
rights lawyer,
1612
01:26:36,600 --> 01:26:39,500
was killed this morning in
the Darfur region in Sudan.
1613
01:26:39,600 --> 01:26:42,100
...a land mine.
The 55-year-old was in
1614
01:26:42,100 --> 01:26:44,300
the war-torn region after
joining international efforts...
1615
01:26:44,400 --> 01:26:47,000
Mr Darcy was a leading
international figure in human rights
1616
01:26:47,000 --> 01:26:48,400
and crisis resolution...
1617
01:26:48,400 --> 01:26:50,000
...gained
global recognition
1618
01:26:50,000 --> 01:26:52,300
with the Kafir Aghani
and Eleanor Heaney case,
1619
01:26:52,400 --> 01:26:53,900
which, of course, he won.
1620
01:26:53,900 --> 01:26:56,300
He leaves behind his
wife, Bridget Jones,
1621
01:26:56,400 --> 01:26:59,200
and their two young
children, Billy and Mabel.
1622
01:26:59,200 --> 01:27:02,900
More on this story as we get it.
1623
01:27:59,500 --> 01:28:01,100
Dearest
darling Mark,
1624
01:28:02,700 --> 01:28:05,200
it's your birthday
on Sunday, and...
1625
01:28:07,000 --> 01:28:10,200
...I'm just no good at
doing this on my own.
1626
01:28:12,500 --> 01:28:14,600
I'm sorry I'm such a bad mother.
1627
01:28:14,600 --> 01:28:18,200
I'm sorry I got caught
up with a callow toy boy.
1628
01:28:18,300 --> 01:28:22,100
I'm sorry I'm late for school
and that Billy's withdrawn.
1629
01:28:23,700 --> 01:28:25,700
They're growing up without you.
1630
01:28:27,300 --> 01:28:28,600
How is Billy going to understand
1631
01:28:28,600 --> 01:28:32,000
how to be a man
without his father?
1632
01:28:32,000 --> 01:28:34,000
How is Mabel going
to live her life
1633
01:28:34,000 --> 01:28:36,000
having never really
known you at all?
1634
01:28:37,400 --> 01:28:39,100
Please forgive me
for being upset
1635
01:28:39,100 --> 01:28:42,600
about anything which isn't
about not having you.
1636
01:28:42,700 --> 01:28:45,600
Please help me find
a way to do this
1637
01:28:45,600 --> 01:28:50,000
without feeling like I'm ruining
the most important part of my life.
1638
01:28:52,500 --> 01:28:55,000
The only part that
still has you in it.
1639
01:29:10,000 --> 01:29:13,300
I have to put down how many tickets
we need for my Christmas concert.
1640
01:29:13,300 --> 01:29:15,700
-Mm-hmm.
-Should I put down two? For you and Mabel?
1641
01:29:15,700 --> 01:29:16,600
Put three.
1642
01:29:16,600 --> 01:29:20,200
Mabel, me and Chloe.
1643
01:29:20,200 --> 01:29:22,200
OK. Three.
1644
01:29:23,100 --> 01:29:24,100
Finished.
1645
01:29:24,200 --> 01:29:25,200
Me too.
1646
01:29:34,500 --> 01:29:36,600
Daddy will love these.
1647
01:29:37,300 --> 01:29:38,700
They're perfect.
1648
01:29:38,700 --> 01:29:39,700
Yes.
1649
01:29:39,700 --> 01:29:41,300
Did you write one, Mummy?
1650
01:29:41,300 --> 01:29:42,700
I did.
1651
01:29:42,700 --> 01:29:45,000
Tomorrow, can we
post them to Daddy?
1652
01:29:45,100 --> 01:29:46,200
Of course we can.
1653
01:29:54,100 --> 01:29:56,800
And Mark's birthday
came as it always did...
1654
01:29:59,100 --> 01:30:03,500
like all the celebrations,
Christmases and anniversaries.
1655
01:30:03,500 --> 01:30:06,300
All the love and all the pain.
1656
01:30:13,100 --> 01:30:15,100
OK. Ready?
1657
01:30:16,400 --> 01:30:17,500
On three.
1658
01:30:18,500 --> 01:30:22,000
One, two...
1659
01:30:29,600 --> 01:30:32,100
What am I going to
do when I get to...
1660
01:30:32,100 --> 01:30:33,300
...three.
1661
01:31:17,500 --> 01:31:20,700
What I have is what
I love most in the world.
1662
01:31:21,500 --> 01:31:23,500
Billy and Mabel.
1663
01:31:23,500 --> 01:31:25,300
Just the three of us.
1664
01:31:34,400 --> 01:31:36,400
♪ Whoo! ♪
1665
01:31:36,500 --> 01:31:38,600
- Mr Walliker.
- Mrs Darcy.
1666
01:31:38,600 --> 01:31:40,600
♪ Darling, you got
to let me Know... ♪
1667
01:31:40,700 --> 01:31:42,400
Billy!
1668
01:31:42,500 --> 01:31:44,300
- Hello!
- Hello!
1669
01:31:44,400 --> 01:31:45,400
Ready?
1670
01:31:47,200 --> 01:31:50,600
♪ If
you say that you are mine ♪
1671
01:31:50,600 --> 01:31:53,600
♪ I'll be here till
the end Of time ♪
1672
01:31:55,500 --> 01:31:59,800
♪ So you got to let me know ♪
1673
01:31:59,800 --> 01:32:02,300
♪ Should I stay
Or should I go? ♪
1674
01:32:03,900 --> 01:32:06,700
♪ Should I stay Or
should I go now? ♪
1675
01:32:07,900 --> 01:32:11,100
♪ Should I stay Or
should I go now? ♪
1676
01:32:12,700 --> 01:32:16,600
♪ If I go There
will be trouble ♪
1677
01:32:16,600 --> 01:32:20,600
♪ And if I stay It
will be double ♪
1678
01:32:20,600 --> 01:32:25,200
♪ So you gotta let me know ♪
1679
01:32:25,200 --> 01:32:27,900
♪ Should I stay
Or should I go? ♪
1680
01:32:27,900 --> 01:32:29,400
Have a good walk, then.
1681
01:32:29,500 --> 01:32:30,500
Thank you.
1682
01:32:30,500 --> 01:32:32,700
Bye.
1683
01:32:33,500 --> 01:32:34,600
All right, come in.
1684
01:32:35,300 --> 01:32:36,300
Now...
1685
01:32:38,600 --> 01:32:42,700
what this is not is a "walk."
1686
01:32:43,600 --> 01:32:45,600
We are about to embark as a team
1687
01:32:45,600 --> 01:32:48,400
on an orienteering adventure.
1688
01:32:48,400 --> 01:32:50,800
- So do you each have your compasses?
- Yes!
1689
01:32:50,800 --> 01:32:53,400
- Do you each have your maps?
- Yes!
1690
01:32:53,400 --> 01:32:55,700
Right then, you know
your groups. Hands up, Otters!
1691
01:32:55,700 --> 01:32:59,800
You'll go along with Mr Collins
and Bikram's mum, Mrs Pasricha.
1692
01:32:59,800 --> 01:33:03,800
Billy's mum, Mrs Darcy. You've
drawn the short straw, I'm afraid.
1693
01:33:03,800 --> 01:33:05,500
You'll be joining
me and the Ospreys.
1694
01:33:05,500 --> 01:33:08,400
Now, this is very important.
1695
01:33:08,400 --> 01:33:12,800
Remember to open your
eyes and look around.
1696
01:33:13,700 --> 01:33:14,800
This is one of the most
1697
01:33:14,900 --> 01:33:17,400
beautiful places on earth.
1698
01:33:19,400 --> 01:33:20,600
Enjoy it.
1699
01:33:20,600 --> 01:33:21,800
Let's go.
1700
01:33:23,900 --> 01:33:27,600
- You sure you're up to this, Mrs Darcy?
- Absolutely!
1701
01:33:27,600 --> 01:33:29,000
I was a Queen's Guide.
1702
01:33:29,000 --> 01:33:31,900
Got my Pioneer badge.
1703
01:33:31,900 --> 01:33:35,500
I can rope, knot,
splice and lash.
1704
01:33:35,600 --> 01:33:37,800
If you need anything tied up,
1705
01:33:37,800 --> 01:33:40,400
I'm your girl.
1706
01:33:40,400 --> 01:33:42,800
Right then. Bring up the rear.
1707
01:33:44,700 --> 01:33:47,500
Yes! Bringing up the rear!
1708
01:33:47,500 --> 01:33:48,900
Up!
1709
01:33:48,900 --> 01:33:50,700
We're gonna see much
more water than that.
1710
01:33:50,800 --> 01:33:51,900
Up the rear!
1711
01:33:53,900 --> 01:33:54,900
Yep.
1712
01:33:55,000 --> 01:33:56,900
Make sure everybody's with us.
1713
01:34:15,900 --> 01:34:18,500
You can see the
second waterfall, can't you?
1714
01:34:20,900 --> 01:34:23,000
Well, those two are together.
1715
01:34:34,800 --> 01:34:35,900
Coming!
1716
01:34:39,700 --> 01:34:41,400
Hurry along. Come on!
1717
01:34:48,400 --> 01:34:50,400
- Give me your hand.
- Wow. So cool.
1718
01:34:50,500 --> 01:34:51,500
OK.
1719
01:34:53,700 --> 01:34:54,700
Right.
1720
01:34:55,700 --> 01:34:57,000
Is there a Wi-Fi password?
1721
01:34:57,100 --> 01:34:58,800
Oh, Atticus, don't be a pillock.
1722
01:34:58,800 --> 01:35:00,500
All right, take this tarp
1723
01:35:00,500 --> 01:35:02,400
and spread it out on the
floor over there, all right?
1724
01:35:02,400 --> 01:35:03,900
Come on.
1725
01:35:03,900 --> 01:35:06,400
It's all right.
It's dry.
1726
01:35:09,400 --> 01:35:12,100
Mrs Darcy, could
you take that wheelbarrow,
1727
01:35:12,100 --> 01:35:14,300
pick up some firewood
for when the rain stops?
1728
01:35:14,400 --> 01:35:15,900
Yep.
1729
01:35:15,900 --> 01:35:18,400
All right, everyone.
Do your best to get dry.
1730
01:35:21,900 --> 01:35:24,000
Ding-fucking-dong.
1731
01:35:24,100 --> 01:35:25,500
Whenever you're ready.
1732
01:35:36,100 --> 01:35:38,000
Looks like
we'll be here for a while.
1733
01:35:49,800 --> 01:35:51,900
It really is
absolutely disgusting.
1734
01:35:51,900 --> 01:35:54,400
Burnt to a crisp.
1735
01:35:54,400 --> 01:35:56,500
I think you'll
find it's a brûlée.
1736
01:36:00,000 --> 01:36:01,000
Come on, then.
1737
01:36:01,000 --> 01:36:02,800
Off to Bedfordshire.
1738
01:36:02,800 --> 01:36:04,600
Goodnight,
Mr Walliker.
1739
01:36:04,700 --> 01:36:06,900
- Here we are.
- Sleep well, team.
1740
01:36:06,900 --> 01:36:09,000
- Well done today.
- Thank you.
1741
01:36:09,000 --> 01:36:10,700
Okay. Night night.
1742
01:36:12,100 --> 01:36:13,100
Goodnight.
1743
01:36:22,000 --> 01:36:24,000
Mission accomplished.
1744
01:36:24,100 --> 01:36:27,500
One barnful of
sleeping children.
1745
01:36:27,500 --> 01:36:30,700
Don't get me wrong, I'm quite
impressed by your resourcefulness,
1746
01:36:30,700 --> 01:36:32,500
but who travels to
the Lake District
1747
01:36:32,500 --> 01:36:34,700
with a backpack full of
marshmallows?
1748
01:36:34,800 --> 01:36:37,800
All parents know the marshmallow
1749
01:36:37,900 --> 01:36:40,800
is an essential
tool, Mr Walliker.
1750
01:36:45,500 --> 01:36:47,400
Do you have children?
1751
01:36:47,500 --> 01:36:49,900
Uh, no. No, no, I
never did any of that.
1752
01:36:50,900 --> 01:36:53,000
But, um...
1753
01:36:53,000 --> 01:36:54,600
It's funny. In the
back of your mind,
1754
01:36:54,600 --> 01:36:56,900
you think it might
happen, and...
1755
01:36:56,900 --> 01:36:58,700
But, you know, one day,
1756
01:36:58,800 --> 01:37:01,700
you're preparing a test
for a periodic table...
1757
01:37:01,700 --> 01:37:06,100
...and you realise
it's the 27th one you've set,
1758
01:37:06,100 --> 01:37:08,500
and there's just never been time
1759
01:37:08,600 --> 01:37:10,900
to really think about
having anything like a...
1760
01:37:10,900 --> 01:37:12,700
like a family in between.
1761
01:37:16,800 --> 01:37:18,000
But it's good.
1762
01:37:19,000 --> 01:37:20,900
It's good. I, uh...
1763
01:37:20,900 --> 01:37:22,200
Well, it suits me.
1764
01:37:23,800 --> 01:37:25,000
Mmm.
1765
01:37:26,500 --> 01:37:27,700
I see it does.
1766
01:37:30,900 --> 01:37:32,500
I mean, look at that.
1767
01:37:35,900 --> 01:37:37,100
All of it.
1768
01:37:40,000 --> 01:37:44,800
You asked me where's the
wonder and the magic.
1769
01:37:46,900 --> 01:37:48,200
It's a good question.
1770
01:37:50,700 --> 01:37:52,000
I think it's here.
1771
01:37:53,200 --> 01:37:56,100
You don't believe in
magic, Mr Walliker.
1772
01:37:56,100 --> 01:37:57,500
No.
1773
01:37:58,800 --> 01:38:00,200
Well, I've been thinking.
1774
01:38:11,700 --> 01:38:12,800
Mummy?
1775
01:38:12,900 --> 01:38:14,300
Atticus is really frightened.
1776
01:38:14,300 --> 01:38:17,300
He says his mum sings Puccini
to him when he's scared.
1777
01:38:17,300 --> 01:38:21,800
Well, he might have to settle
for some early Take That,
1778
01:38:21,900 --> 01:38:24,300
but I'll see what
I can do, okay?
1779
01:38:25,600 --> 01:38:27,000
Mr Walliker,
1780
01:38:27,000 --> 01:38:29,100
do you mind if I sit
here for a minute?
1781
01:38:29,100 --> 01:38:30,800
Of course. Sit down.
1782
01:38:46,100 --> 01:38:48,200
- Is there anything you want to...
- It's just...
1783
01:38:49,100 --> 01:38:50,600
what if I forget him?
1784
01:38:51,800 --> 01:38:53,200
I don't wanna forget him.
1785
01:38:54,200 --> 01:38:56,000
But what if I do?
1786
01:39:02,600 --> 01:39:04,800
Let me tell you
this, Billy, um...
1787
01:39:06,800 --> 01:39:10,600
Your dad is everywhere.
1788
01:39:12,700 --> 01:39:13,800
He's everywhere.
1789
01:39:14,600 --> 01:39:15,600
Right now...
1790
01:39:17,600 --> 01:39:19,100
in this moment.
1791
01:39:19,100 --> 01:39:21,300
And that's a scientific fact.
1792
01:39:22,900 --> 01:39:26,800
Energy is only transferred.
1793
01:39:27,800 --> 01:39:29,100
It can never be destroyed.
1794
01:39:30,000 --> 01:39:31,900
And more importantly,
1795
01:39:31,900 --> 01:39:34,000
your father is in you.
1796
01:39:36,000 --> 01:39:37,200
And Mabel.
1797
01:39:43,000 --> 01:39:44,500
Billy, tell me something...
1798
01:39:47,000 --> 01:39:48,200
one thing...
1799
01:39:49,600 --> 01:39:51,000
that you remember best
1800
01:39:51,800 --> 01:39:53,500
about your dad.
1801
01:40:04,100 --> 01:40:08,300
♪ Another Christmas
Is around the corner ♪
1802
01:40:08,300 --> 01:40:12,700
♪ And I can feel us,
darling Getting closer ♪
1803
01:40:12,800 --> 01:40:16,700
♪ It's coming down the
road And stopping it now ♪
1804
01:40:16,700 --> 01:40:20,600
♪ Stopping it now
Is impossible... ♪
1805
01:40:20,700 --> 01:40:21,700
Can we?
1806
01:40:22,700 --> 01:40:24,100
- May we.
- Yes.
1807
01:40:24,100 --> 01:40:26,900
♪ I built a snowman
out The back ♪
1808
01:40:27,000 --> 01:40:31,700
♪ It came alive And flew
me Round this sleepy town ♪
1809
01:40:31,800 --> 01:40:34,800
♪ I put an old scarf
round Its neck... ♪
1810
01:40:34,800 --> 01:40:36,300
Careful!
1811
01:40:36,300 --> 01:40:37,800
♪ And every time
You kiss me... ♪
1812
01:40:37,900 --> 01:40:38,900
Chop-chop.
1813
01:40:39,000 --> 01:40:40,300
One, two. One, two.
1814
01:40:40,300 --> 01:40:41,900
May I have
your hot chocolate?
1815
01:40:41,900 --> 01:40:44,700
- No. No! Marshmallows!
- Yes. Yes.
1816
01:40:44,700 --> 01:40:47,900
Mabel, why don't I
take you to your seat? Come on.
1817
01:40:47,900 --> 01:40:49,600
Is that all right?
1818
01:40:50,800 --> 01:40:53,000
- Don't dawdle, Mrs Darcy.
- No.
1819
01:40:53,000 --> 01:40:54,600
Show's starting.
1820
01:40:54,600 --> 01:40:56,700
Yes, of course.
1821
01:41:10,200 --> 01:41:12,100
- That sounds fantastic.
- Yeah.
1822
01:41:12,100 --> 01:41:13,800
I'll see you at Nobu at 7.00.
1823
01:41:13,800 --> 01:41:16,200
Oh, for God's sake, Victor.
1824
01:41:16,200 --> 01:41:18,100
Fucking prick.
1825
01:41:22,900 --> 01:41:26,100
Bravo! Bravo.
1826
01:41:30,700 --> 01:41:33,400
Thank you, Eros
and Atticus Soltani-Watkins.
1827
01:41:34,700 --> 01:41:37,100
Now, although it's
not on the programme,
1828
01:41:37,100 --> 01:41:39,800
we do have one...
one more song.
1829
01:41:39,800 --> 01:41:43,900
Um, I happen to know it
means a lot to our singer.
1830
01:41:43,900 --> 01:41:48,100
And, um... well, this is his
first-ever solo performance,
1831
01:41:49,300 --> 01:41:51,200
and I know he'll
do himself proud.
1832
01:42:22,900 --> 01:42:27,200
♪ I'd do anything ♪
1833
01:42:27,200 --> 01:42:32,100
♪ For you, dear, anything ♪
1834
01:42:32,100 --> 01:42:37,000
♪ For you mean everything ♪
1835
01:42:37,100 --> 01:42:41,100
♪ To me ♪
1836
01:42:41,100 --> 01:42:43,000
♪ I know that ♪
1837
01:42:43,000 --> 01:42:46,900
♪ I'd go anywhere ♪
1838
01:42:47,000 --> 01:42:52,100
♪ For your smile, anywhere ♪
1839
01:42:52,100 --> 01:42:55,000
♪ For your smile ♪
1840
01:42:55,000 --> 01:43:01,100
♪ Everywhere I'd see ♪
1841
01:43:01,200 --> 01:43:04,100
♪ Would you climb a hill? ♪
1842
01:43:04,200 --> 01:43:05,700
♪ Anything ♪
1843
01:43:05,800 --> 01:43:10,400
♪ Wear a daffodil? Anything ♪
1844
01:43:10,400 --> 01:43:15,000
♪ Leave me all your
will? Anything ♪
1845
01:43:15,000 --> 01:43:18,300
♪ Even fight my Bill? ♪
1846
01:43:18,300 --> 01:43:20,300
♪ What? Fisticuffs? ♪
1847
01:43:20,300 --> 01:43:24,300
♪ I'd risk everything ♪
1848
01:43:24,400 --> 01:43:29,000
♪ For one kiss, everything ♪
1849
01:43:29,000 --> 01:43:33,900
♪ Yes, I'd do anything ♪
1850
01:43:34,000 --> 01:43:36,200
♪ Anything ♪
1851
01:43:36,200 --> 01:43:41,300
♪ For you ♪
1852
01:43:54,100 --> 01:43:55,300
Go, Billy!
1853
01:44:00,000 --> 01:44:01,000
Bravo!
1854
01:44:35,900 --> 01:44:37,800
Oh, my darling.
1855
01:44:40,100 --> 01:44:43,100
Daddy would be so proud of you.
1856
01:44:43,100 --> 01:44:44,300
I know.
1857
01:44:46,600 --> 01:44:48,400
Well done,
Billy. You nailed it.
1858
01:44:48,400 --> 01:44:50,800
- Were you surprised, Mum?
- Yes.
1859
01:44:50,900 --> 01:44:52,900
- Genius.
- Up top.
1860
01:44:54,900 --> 01:44:57,400
- So, can I have a sleepover with Bikram?
- Yes.
1861
01:44:57,500 --> 01:44:59,400
- And did you bring my...
- Yes.
1862
01:44:59,400 --> 01:45:01,600
Bikram! Nintendo!
1863
01:45:03,400 --> 01:45:06,300
Mr Walliker, Billy was...
1864
01:45:06,300 --> 01:45:08,500
The whole thing
was...
1865
01:45:08,500 --> 01:45:11,900
- It was...
- It was magic, Mrs Darcy.
1866
01:45:11,900 --> 01:45:13,600
No, it wasn't.
1867
01:45:13,600 --> 01:45:15,900
What you've done for Billy...
1868
01:45:17,300 --> 01:45:19,800
People talk about
moving on like it means,
1869
01:45:19,900 --> 01:45:22,300
you know, leaving
something behind,
1870
01:45:22,300 --> 01:45:24,400
you know, leaving
someone you love behind,
1871
01:45:24,400 --> 01:45:27,000
but perhaps it's more
that suddenly you see
1872
01:45:27,000 --> 01:45:30,400
you can live at the same time
as all the things you've lost,
1873
01:45:30,400 --> 01:45:34,600
and that you can be
happy even without them.
1874
01:45:34,600 --> 01:45:37,400
And tonight, I saw
my son up there
1875
01:45:37,500 --> 01:45:41,200
and I understood for the
first time in four years
1876
01:45:41,200 --> 01:45:43,300
that he's going to be okay.
1877
01:45:43,300 --> 01:45:45,400
And so, we're going to be okay.
1878
01:45:45,400 --> 01:45:47,100
And you did that, Mr Walliker.
1879
01:45:47,200 --> 01:45:48,500
It wasn't magic.
1880
01:45:49,500 --> 01:45:51,400
It was you.
1881
01:45:51,500 --> 01:45:56,200
So, I'll overlook your tendency
to be a little aloof...
1882
01:45:56,200 --> 01:45:58,200
Some might call
it condescending.
1883
01:45:58,300 --> 01:46:00,100
Supercilious is a good word
1884
01:46:00,100 --> 01:46:03,900
and you probably don't hear
it enough, but the point is...
1885
01:46:07,100 --> 01:46:08,100
thank you.
1886
01:46:10,300 --> 01:46:11,500
Mr Walliker?
1887
01:46:13,100 --> 01:46:15,500
We're going to The
Spaniards for a drink.
1888
01:46:15,500 --> 01:46:19,200
Um, and if you wanted to come,
1889
01:46:19,200 --> 01:46:21,700
well, we'd be there
1890
01:46:21,700 --> 01:46:26,200
because that's where we'll be.
1891
01:46:26,300 --> 01:46:29,400
Can't be taught. Can't
be taught. It was unbelievable.
1892
01:46:29,500 --> 01:46:31,400
- Mrs Darcy.
- The flautists, an absolute triumph.
1893
01:46:31,400 --> 01:46:33,600
One of the best
Christmas shows I've ever seen.
1894
01:46:33,600 --> 01:46:36,100
Christmas shows don't get
much better than that. Extraordinary.
1895
01:46:36,100 --> 01:46:38,300
No, it doesn't. Don't
look at me like that.
1896
01:46:38,300 --> 01:46:40,200
- Billy! How did it go?
- Billy!
1897
01:46:40,200 --> 01:46:41,300
- I did a solo.
- Oh!
1898
01:46:41,400 --> 01:46:42,600
Congratulations.
1899
01:46:42,700 --> 01:46:45,000
Come here. Have a squidge.
1900
01:46:45,000 --> 01:46:47,000
He was brilliant.
1901
01:46:47,000 --> 01:46:48,600
- Hello, Mabel. How are you?
- Well done. I bet you were.
1902
01:46:48,700 --> 01:46:50,600
- Chloe has a video.
- You look lovely.
1903
01:46:50,600 --> 01:46:52,200
- There's a video?
- A video?
1904
01:46:52,200 --> 01:46:53,500
Chloe? Video?
1905
01:46:55,000 --> 01:46:56,300
Congratulations.
1906
01:46:56,400 --> 01:46:58,000
Hi. Uh, four, uh...
1907
01:46:58,000 --> 01:47:00,100
large glasses of
white wine, please.
1908
01:47:00,200 --> 01:47:01,500
Wine. Wine.
1909
01:47:01,500 --> 01:47:03,600
Oh, house white. Party petrol.
1910
01:47:03,600 --> 01:47:06,200
- Bikram's here!
- Your wine, ladies.
1911
01:47:06,300 --> 01:47:09,300
- What are you doing down there?
- Nothing.
1912
01:47:09,300 --> 01:47:11,500
- Well, there we go.
- Congratulations, darling.
1913
01:47:11,500 --> 01:47:13,500
- To Billy.
- He was wonderful. Billy.
1914
01:47:13,500 --> 01:47:15,700
- Absolutely wonderful.
- Yes.
1915
01:47:15,700 --> 01:47:19,000
But I can tell you, I... I knew
from his glow it was a triumph.
1916
01:47:19,000 --> 01:47:20,600
No, honestly.
1917
01:47:20,600 --> 01:47:22,600
I mean, once you've
tasted success...
1918
01:47:24,800 --> 01:47:26,600
You had
literally one song, Tom.
1919
01:47:26,600 --> 01:47:29,100
Yes, you know, my
mother always says
1920
01:47:29,200 --> 01:47:31,600
if you've got nothing nice to
say, then shut the fuck up.
1921
01:47:31,700 --> 01:47:33,500
Your mother's right,
so shut the fuck up.
1922
01:47:33,500 --> 01:47:35,500
We should
never shut the fuck up.
1923
01:47:35,600 --> 01:47:38,000
Stop telling everyone
else to shut the fuck up.
1924
01:47:38,000 --> 01:47:40,000
We can, yes.
1925
01:47:42,700 --> 01:47:45,300
- No. Come on.
- Good overtaking.
1926
01:47:45,400 --> 01:47:47,100
No, I didn't. That was him.
1927
01:47:47,200 --> 01:47:49,000
Mum. That way.
1928
01:47:55,700 --> 01:47:57,200
Mr Walliker!
1929
01:47:59,100 --> 01:48:00,300
Aren't you coming in?
1930
01:48:00,300 --> 01:48:02,300
Well, actually, I was. I...
1931
01:48:02,300 --> 01:48:04,200
I wanted to say
something to you,
1932
01:48:04,200 --> 01:48:05,700
but it's the wrong time.
1933
01:48:05,700 --> 01:48:08,100
You're there with
everyone, and...
1934
01:48:08,100 --> 01:48:10,700
I'm better with people about
4 foot tall.
1935
01:48:10,700 --> 01:48:14,500
4'1". That's my sweet spot,
as it turns out, so...
1936
01:48:15,600 --> 01:48:17,300
Where are you going?
1937
01:48:22,300 --> 01:48:25,100
Well, look, I really just
wanted to discuss Newton.
1938
01:48:25,200 --> 01:48:26,800
Newton?
1939
01:48:26,800 --> 01:48:29,800
I mean, we already covered
Newton's second law, gravity,
1940
01:48:29,800 --> 01:48:32,400
in the tree when you were
pretending not to be stuck.
1941
01:48:32,400 --> 01:48:36,200
But the one that's always
fascinated me isn't the second law.
1942
01:48:36,300 --> 01:48:39,400
I mean, any idiot can see that
an apple's gonna fall down.
1943
01:48:39,400 --> 01:48:40,700
What's it gonna do, fall up?
1944
01:48:40,800 --> 01:48:43,000
It's a hopelessly
overrated law, the second.
1945
01:48:43,100 --> 01:48:46,300
No, the one that's always
interested me is the third law.
1946
01:48:46,300 --> 01:48:47,800
You'll know what that is.
1947
01:48:47,800 --> 01:48:49,100
Yes.
1948
01:48:49,100 --> 01:48:52,100
Of
course. But go on.
1949
01:48:52,100 --> 01:48:55,600
For every action, there's an
equal and opposite reaction.
1950
01:48:55,600 --> 01:48:57,700
It's a fundamental
law of our universe.
1951
01:48:57,700 --> 01:49:00,200
It's, uh... It's an inescapable
fact of our existence,
1952
01:49:00,300 --> 01:49:02,300
and I was coming to
say that you are...
1953
01:49:03,500 --> 01:49:06,500
this force, Mrs Darcy...
1954
01:49:07,800 --> 01:49:08,800
to me.
1955
01:49:10,600 --> 01:49:14,200
Equal and... opposite.
1956
01:49:14,300 --> 01:49:18,700
And just as Newton
predicted, it's irresistible.
1957
01:49:21,300 --> 01:49:22,300
I see it.
1958
01:49:24,600 --> 01:49:27,100
Right now, just standing
here, I feel it,
1959
01:49:27,100 --> 01:49:30,500
and it's as real to me as the
things I loved when I was a boy
1960
01:49:30,600 --> 01:49:32,500
and first started
looking at the world.
1961
01:49:32,600 --> 01:49:35,200
You see, it's not really order
1962
01:49:35,200 --> 01:49:38,500
that we science people fall
in love with, Mrs Darcy,
1963
01:49:38,500 --> 01:49:40,600
it's the beauty in things.
1964
01:49:43,300 --> 01:49:44,600
The beauty,
1965
01:49:45,300 --> 01:49:46,700
to be specific...
1966
01:49:50,300 --> 01:49:51,600
in you.
1967
01:49:56,400 --> 01:49:57,700
Oh.
1968
01:49:58,500 --> 01:50:00,900
Oh, I'm... I'm sorry.
1969
01:50:00,900 --> 01:50:02,800
- I don't know what I was thinking.
- No, no.
1970
01:50:02,800 --> 01:50:04,800
This is exactly why I
decided not to come in.
1971
01:50:04,800 --> 01:50:06,800
I've clearly got entirely
the wrong end of the...
1972
01:50:06,800 --> 01:50:08,400
- Mr Walliker...
- Look, I just want you to know
1973
01:50:08,500 --> 01:50:10,400
that this is not going to
be awkward at all. At all.
1974
01:50:10,400 --> 01:50:13,100
- Please stop talking.
- With Billy and school.
1975
01:50:13,200 --> 01:50:15,500
Let's just pretend this never
happened, please. Let's just...
1976
01:50:31,500 --> 01:50:33,900
It was either that or a whistle,
1977
01:50:33,900 --> 01:50:36,900
and I haven't got a
whistle, Mr Walliker.
1978
01:50:39,400 --> 01:50:40,900
Call me Scott, for God's sake.
1979
01:50:42,800 --> 01:50:44,300
Yes, Mr Walliker.
1980
01:51:02,300 --> 01:51:05,400
Right, shake it, shake
it, shake it. No, go mad.
1981
01:51:05,400 --> 01:51:06,900
That's it. Now pour it out.
1982
01:51:07,900 --> 01:51:08,900
Very good.
1983
01:51:09,700 --> 01:51:11,700
Insert one cherry.
1984
01:51:11,800 --> 01:51:15,200
And that, my friends, is
how we make a Dirty Bitch.
1985
01:51:17,200 --> 01:51:20,500
Christ. That may even be a
Filthy Bitch. Pass that round.
1986
01:51:20,500 --> 01:51:23,400
Now, similar but
not at all the same,
1987
01:51:24,300 --> 01:51:25,500
the Bad Mummy.
1988
01:51:25,500 --> 01:51:27,400
Little bit of vodka.
1989
01:51:27,400 --> 01:51:28,800
- Yeah?
- Come here.
1990
01:51:28,800 --> 01:51:30,800
Okay, you're in charge.
1991
01:51:36,500 --> 01:51:38,400
Is that who I think it is?
1992
01:51:38,400 --> 01:51:40,600
So they tell me, yeah.
What do you think?
1993
01:51:40,600 --> 01:51:42,800
You have sad
eyes, angelo mio.
1994
01:51:42,900 --> 01:51:45,500
Why so sad? They make me sad.
1995
01:51:45,500 --> 01:51:47,300
I want to see the smile.
1996
01:51:47,300 --> 01:51:48,500
Stop it.
1997
01:51:48,500 --> 01:51:50,300
He's 16!
1998
01:51:50,300 --> 01:51:52,000
Yeah. Late starter.
1999
01:51:52,000 --> 01:51:53,800
Where in
Italy are you from?
2000
01:51:53,800 --> 01:51:55,600
- Bologna.
- Bologna.
2001
01:51:55,700 --> 01:51:56,800
- Yeah.
- Say it again.
2002
01:51:56,900 --> 01:51:58,700
- Bologna.
- Bologna.
2003
01:51:58,700 --> 01:52:00,600
Enzo, the kids are gonna watch
a movie upstairs. You coming?
2004
01:52:00,600 --> 01:52:01,700
He'll stay.
2005
01:52:03,500 --> 01:52:04,500
Boys.
2006
01:52:06,500 --> 01:52:07,800
I think you're proud.
2007
01:52:07,900 --> 01:52:09,700
Relief, really, Jones.
2008
01:52:09,700 --> 01:52:11,400
Kin, as you said.
2009
01:52:12,900 --> 01:52:14,500
- Enzo.
- Yeah?
2010
01:52:14,600 --> 01:52:15,900
Vieni qua.
2011
01:52:15,900 --> 01:52:17,500
- I beg your pardon.
- Okay.
2012
01:52:17,500 --> 01:52:19,600
- Ciao.
- Ciao.
2013
01:52:19,600 --> 01:52:21,500
This is your hostess
2014
01:52:21,500 --> 01:52:24,500
and one of the great loves of
your father's life, Bridget Jones.
2015
01:52:27,400 --> 01:52:28,800
Ooh!
2016
01:52:28,900 --> 01:52:31,500
It's nice to meet you, Enzo.
2017
01:52:33,100 --> 01:52:35,700
He says it is a great
honour to meet you.
2018
01:52:35,800 --> 01:52:39,000
Oh!
2019
01:52:40,900 --> 01:52:43,600
And then he says that those are
2020
01:52:43,600 --> 01:52:45,900
very, very silly little boots.
2021
01:52:49,000 --> 01:52:51,400
You have incredible posture.
2022
01:52:52,600 --> 01:52:53,900
You're not Danish, are you?
2023
01:52:53,900 --> 01:52:55,700
Well, I can be
anything you want.
2024
01:52:55,800 --> 01:52:57,900
It is, isn't it? I know, and
it's working really well for you,
2025
01:52:57,900 --> 01:53:00,000
but all I'm saying is maybe
it's time for a rebrand.
2026
01:53:00,000 --> 01:53:02,000
Have you ever thought
about having a pixie cut?
2027
01:53:02,100 --> 01:53:03,500
No.
2028
01:53:03,500 --> 01:53:04,800
Oh, you have the face for it.
2029
01:53:04,900 --> 01:53:06,900
And it's utterly changed
my life.
2030
01:53:06,900 --> 01:53:09,500
Nonsense, Pam. You're
perfect just as you are.
2031
01:53:09,500 --> 01:53:11,300
Is that a Dirty Bitch?
2032
01:53:12,100 --> 01:53:13,900
Steady on.
2033
01:53:13,900 --> 01:53:16,600
Oh, yes, please. Yes,
thank you very much.
2034
01:53:16,600 --> 01:53:18,400
Thanks.
2035
01:53:18,400 --> 01:53:19,900
- Just what the doctor ordered.
- Me too.
2036
01:53:19,900 --> 01:53:22,700
- Always. Take a horn.
- Give me the fucking horn.
2037
01:53:22,700 --> 01:53:24,500
- Thank you, thank you.
- Yep.
2038
01:53:24,500 --> 01:53:27,900
- Mmm. Oh.
- Mmm. Mmm.
2039
01:53:28,000 --> 01:53:31,400
I'll be honest, I don't know what I'd have
done in the past 20 years without you lot.
2040
01:53:31,500 --> 01:53:34,000
- Twenty?
- No, it's not. It's thirty?
2041
01:53:34,000 --> 01:53:35,900
Yeah, it's more like
30 years, to be honest.
2042
01:53:36,000 --> 01:53:38,400
We've had some fucking
fun though, haven't we?
2043
01:53:41,700 --> 01:53:43,300
We have.
2044
01:53:44,800 --> 01:53:48,400
Ten, nine, eight,
2045
01:53:48,400 --> 01:53:51,800
seven, six, five,
2046
01:53:51,800 --> 01:53:54,400
four, three,
2047
01:53:54,500 --> 01:53:56,600
two, one!
2048
01:53:56,600 --> 01:53:59,400
Happy New Year!
2049
01:54:03,400 --> 01:54:04,800
♪ ...be forgot ♪
2050
01:54:04,800 --> 01:54:07,700
♪ And never brought to mind? ♪
2051
01:54:07,700 --> 01:54:09,400
Happy New Year.
2052
01:54:09,400 --> 01:54:13,400
♪ Should auld
acquaintance Be forgot ♪
2053
01:54:13,500 --> 01:54:17,800
♪ For the sake Of
auld lang syne? ♪
2054
01:54:17,800 --> 01:54:22,000
♪ For auld lang syne, my dear ♪
2055
01:54:22,100 --> 01:54:26,600
♪ For auld lang syne ♪
2056
01:54:26,600 --> 01:54:31,100
♪ We'll take a cup
Of kindness yet ♪
2057
01:54:31,100 --> 01:54:35,400
♪ For the sake Of
auld lang syne ♪
2058
01:56:16,100 --> 01:56:17,600
I forgot to check.
2059
01:56:22,800 --> 01:56:23,800
Look.
2060
01:56:51,700 --> 01:56:52,700
Goodnight.
2061
01:57:11,900 --> 01:57:13,300
Ooh.
2062
01:57:13,400 --> 01:57:15,000
Bloody zip.
2063
01:57:20,000 --> 01:57:23,300
Bastard tyrannical dress people.
2064
01:57:28,200 --> 01:57:29,500
I've got it.
2065
01:57:32,700 --> 01:57:34,000
Thank you.
2066
01:57:39,800 --> 01:57:41,200
Happy New Year.
2067
01:57:41,200 --> 01:57:43,700
Happy New Year.
2068
01:58:25,200 --> 01:58:28,800
♪ I could go back
to The old place ♪
2069
01:58:28,800 --> 01:58:32,200
♪ And write your name
On every blank page ♪
2070
01:58:32,200 --> 01:58:36,100
♪ But it's a story
now Just a story now ♪
2071
01:58:36,100 --> 01:58:39,300
♪ Just the kind of
thing that You'd say ♪
2072
01:58:39,400 --> 01:58:43,100
♪ They say no need
to Look behind me ♪
2073
01:58:43,200 --> 01:58:46,700
♪ That I can keep
you Here beside me ♪
2074
01:58:46,800 --> 01:58:50,300
♪ To make a mess of it
To make the best of it ♪
2075
01:58:50,300 --> 01:58:55,000
♪ It isn't perfect
But it might be ♪
2076
01:59:02,300 --> 01:59:06,700
♪ There's a lot of
ground To cover ♪
2077
01:59:06,700 --> 01:59:09,400
♪ One foot and then the other ♪
2078
01:59:09,400 --> 01:59:14,800
♪ On my way, my way
To somewhere new ♪
2079
01:59:16,800 --> 01:59:20,300
♪ A few false starts
Can you forgive this ♪
2080
01:59:20,400 --> 01:59:23,800
♪ Cautious car and
just bear with it ♪
2081
01:59:23,800 --> 01:59:29,400
♪ While it does what I
thought it couldn't do ♪
2082
01:59:29,500 --> 01:59:33,300
♪ I could go back
to The old place ♪
2083
01:59:33,300 --> 01:59:36,800
♪ And write your name
On every blank page ♪
2084
01:59:36,900 --> 01:59:40,500
♪ But it's a story
now Just a story now ♪
2085
01:59:40,500 --> 01:59:43,900
♪ Just the kind of
thing that You'd say ♪
2086
01:59:43,900 --> 01:59:47,500
♪ They say no need
to Look behind me ♪
2087
01:59:47,500 --> 01:59:51,000
♪ That I can keep
you Here beside me ♪
2088
01:59:51,000 --> 01:59:54,900
♪ To make a mess of it
To make the best of it ♪
2089
01:59:54,900 --> 01:59:59,500
♪ It isn't perfect
But it might be ♪
2090
02:00:04,900 --> 02:00:06,900
♪ Mmm ♪
2091
02:00:07,000 --> 02:00:10,900
♪ Treading lightly
Thinking slightly ♪
2092
02:00:10,900 --> 02:00:14,300
♪ It just might be
It just might be ♪
2093
02:00:14,300 --> 02:00:17,800
♪ Treading lightly
Thinking slightly ♪
2094
02:00:17,800 --> 02:00:21,400
♪ It just might be
It just might be ♪
2095
02:00:21,400 --> 02:00:23,300
♪ It just might be ♪
2096
02:00:23,300 --> 02:00:26,900
♪ Oh, I can go back
to The old place ♪
2097
02:00:27,000 --> 02:00:30,500
♪ And write your name
On every blank page ♪
2098
02:00:30,600 --> 02:00:34,400
♪ But it's a story
now Just a story now ♪
2099
02:00:34,400 --> 02:00:37,800
♪ Just the kind of
thing that You'd say ♪
2100
02:00:37,900 --> 02:00:41,400
♪ That there's no need
to Look behind me ♪
2101
02:00:41,400 --> 02:00:45,000
♪ That I can keep
you Here beside me ♪
2102
02:00:45,100 --> 02:00:48,800
♪ To make a mess of it
To make the best of it ♪
2103
02:00:48,800 --> 02:00:53,200
♪ It isn't perfect
But it might be ♪
2104
02:00:57,000 --> 02:00:58,900
♪ Like it might be ♪
2105
02:01:00,300 --> 02:01:03,000
♪ Like it might be ♪
2106
02:01:05,000 --> 02:01:09,300
♪ Whoo, whoo ♪
2107
02:01:12,200 --> 02:01:15,500
♪ Might be, might be Might be ♪
2108
02:01:17,400 --> 02:01:20,000
["Have You Met Miss
Jones?"
2109
02:01:27,100 --> 02:01:30,500
♪ "Have you met Miss Jones?" ♪
2110
02:01:30,500 --> 02:01:35,400
♪ Someone said as
We shook hands ♪
2111
02:01:35,400 --> 02:01:41,000
♪ She was just
Miss Jones To me ♪
2112
02:01:42,400 --> 02:01:46,600
♪ And then I said "Miss Jones ♪
2113
02:01:46,600 --> 02:01:50,600
♪ You're a girl
Who understands ♪
2114
02:01:50,600 --> 02:01:56,900
♪ I'm a man Who must be free" ♪
2115
02:01:56,900 --> 02:02:00,900
♪ And all at once
I lost my breath ♪
2116
02:02:00,900 --> 02:02:04,500
♪ And all at once
Was scared to death ♪
2117
02:02:04,500 --> 02:02:07,200
♪ And all at once ♪
2118
02:02:07,200 --> 02:02:14,200
♪ I owned the earth and sky ♪
2119
02:02:14,200 --> 02:02:18,400
♪ And now I've met Miss Jones ♪
2120
02:02:18,500 --> 02:02:24,300
♪ And we'll keep on
meeting 'til we die ♪
2121
02:02:24,300 --> 02:02:26,900
♪ Miss Jones and I ♪
2122
02:02:29,200 --> 02:02:30,500
♪ Whoa, fellas ♪
2123
02:03:07,500 --> 02:03:11,300
♪ And all at once
I lost my breath ♪
2124
02:03:11,400 --> 02:03:15,300
♪ And all at once
Was scared to death ♪
2125
02:03:15,400 --> 02:03:18,000
♪ And all at once ♪
2126
02:03:18,000 --> 02:03:22,900
♪ I owned the earth and sky ♪
2127
02:03:24,600 --> 02:03:28,500
♪ Now I've met Miss Jones ♪
2128
02:03:28,500 --> 02:03:35,000
♪ And we'll keep on
meeting 'til we die ♪
2129
02:03:35,100 --> 02:03:37,900
♪ Miss Jones and I ♪
2130
02:03:39,100 --> 02:03:41,400
♪ Miss Jones and I ♪
2131
02:03:42,700 --> 02:03:45,100
♪ Miss Jones and I ♪
2132
02:03:47,200 --> 02:03:54,000
♪ Miss Jones and I ♪
2133
02:03:58,200 --> 02:03:59,500
♪ Ha! ♪
151229
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