Original subtitles

THIS FILM CONTAINS CONTENT THAT MAY BE DIFFICULT FOR VIEWERS WITH PTSD.

Downloaded from YTS.MX

VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED.

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

FOR MY SISTERS

-Sorry. -Sorry. -I'm sorry.

All right, settle down!

As you know, speech is not perfect

because we are not perfect.

We pause, mumble, stutter, restart sentences

and use filler words.

Um, hmm, like, totally...

sorry.

These words act as disfluencies,

natural interruptions

in the smooth flow of speech.

Whenever we say um, but, like,

we are attempting to undo a mistake

or reshape our future.

Now most of the time we're not even aware we're doing this.

These words are abused

and normalized until they become powerless.

Can we get another example?

Jane.

Sorry.

Jane, what happened?

Sorry, uh...

What happened, Jane?

What happened? What happened?

What happened? Jane?

Jane?

Jane!

Jane, are you okay?

-Yeah. -Hi, welcome to Big Burger.

What do you want?

Let her sleep. Just get her a grilled cheese.

-Yes, we'll have a chicken salad. -Totally forgot about those.

Used to be my little Blue J, now you're all grown up.

What happened?

All right, people.

Two bottom buns, extra cheese?

What do you want?

I wonder what they did with the tops.

Tossed 'em.

Don't tell me that, now I feel responsible.

Maybe you should feel some responsibility.

-I can't believe you let this happen. -I'm going to finish.

-You're damn right you are. -No cat fights!

I never would have expected this from you.

Yes, we'll have a chicken salad.

-Cheeseburger. -Cheeseburger, extra pickles.

-Jane? -I don't want anything.

-You have to eat. -I don't want to.

Jane!

Number five, extra ranch!

Make it a large!

Extra fries.

Could we get three large waters too, please?

I will have to charge for those.

I'm sorry, for water?

Now they're gonna give us little tiny mini Dixie cups.

-Will that be all? -Yes that's all, thank you. Sorry!

This generation wants everything for free,

except for water.

Unbelievable.

♪ You're the cup of coffee I hold in my hand ♪

♪ I don't need ♪

♪ Normal hair, normal stare ♪

♪ Normal this, normal that ♪

♪ Don't look here, there's nothing there ♪

♪ Just normal, normal ♪

♪ I sell a piece of my soul ♪

♪ They slip me their approval ♪

♪ I like what they like ♪

♪ Do they like me ♪

♪ My dear friend I'm home alone ♪

♪ I can't leave again ♪

CREAMY FREEZE

POLICE DEPARTMENT

♪ You knock three times ♪

♪ I know what that means ♪

♪ I knock back ♪

♪ With my crazy hair ♪

♪ Anxious stare, racing thoughts, empty heart ♪

♪ Thought I'd always run away ♪

♪ But you ran with me ♪

-Take your stuff in. -No, I can do it.

I could use the workout.

No soldier left behind.

She needs to do this herself,

and this isn't a free summer vacation,

you're gonna be helping around the house.

And finding a way to get those credits taken care of.

-Honey. -And...get your stuff.

Lacey should be down at the dock.

She's been worried about you.

I got you covered with her. Go on.

Thanks.

-Oh. -Oh, sorry!

-No, it's okay, Amber. -Hey buddy, come here. Hi!

-Who's this little guy? -This is my little man, Theo.

Oh, wow.

You, uh, you have a kid.

Yeah! Kinda thought social media

would have tipped you off to that by now.

It's prevented a lot of awkward conversations, honestly.

I'm not, uh, not great at keeping up.

Well, I should probably get this little one down for a nap, so...

Well, it's... Hey! It's nice to meet you, little guy!

Uh, he's, you know what, he's not much of a talker yet.

He's what, uh, 18 months?

-He's two. -And he doesn't talk at all?

That's right, I forgot you studied, like, speech?

-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I was just-- -Right.

Okay. Can you say bye?

Say bye!

-Bye! -Bye!

Oh, are you okay?

Oh, yeah.

He's just got some strong little teeth, this one.

-Oh. -I will, um, I'll see you later.

Come on. Come on, buddy!

Come on, bud.

Got you, sucker! What's up?

Oh, man!

You good?

Jane? You good?

Yeah, you just really scared me!

Sorry!

You sure?

Yes, I'm sure.

I saw you, uh, ran into Amber.

Her kid actually. Literally.

He's a little Tasmanian devil.

Could you imagine just like having a spawn of yourself?

It's more the having a parasite

growing inside you that gets me.

I think I just wanna like rip it out, you know?

Damn, J, dark.

Do you ever talk to her?

Who, Amber?

No. Why?

I don't know. You're just at mom and dad's all the time, I just--

Nope, she always had a problem with me.

I think it was the other way around.

Please.

Wait, I'm glad you're back.

Do you have any last words?

No.

Lacey, no! No!

Look, okay, so you were supposed to be on a plane tomorrow

headed in a different direction, but--

but you lucked into being a teenager

for the next few months.

Dad says you're worried about me.

Just so he doesn't think that he's the only one, okay?

I am not worried about you.

Jane?

Sorry, what?

I just said, we're not worried about you.

We're so happy that you're back!

Now let's go talk about our periods

until Dad turns off Fox News.

Thanks, but I think I'm gonna go out on the water.

-So, what do you wanna watch tonight? -We're going out!

Don't you think it'd be good idea if you stayed home and relaxed?

I mean, it is your first night back.

I can hear you!

-I was talking to Jane! -Where are we going?

Jordan's! Dad, can I crash here tonight?

I don't want to drive back to Detroit.

Ask your mother!

Dad!

Fine! Don't drink too much.

And I think it'd be a good idea

for you to show a little responsibility

in light of what happened this past week.

Take it from an old pro.

-Nope. -Come on, please.

- Oh my God, Janey, hi!

I haven't seen you in, like, forever.

-Hi! -Hey.

Hey, Kenny!

-Kenny? -Yeah.

Wait, since are you friends with Kennedy?

She's a tour guide at the zoo.

And we go to spin together.

-Who are you? -I don't know.

She's not that bad, come on.

It's like a neighborhood reunion.

What's up? Long time no see.

Ah shit, it's the Durazo twins.

Babe, they're not twins.

Wait, are you guys twins?

Did you get held back a grade?

No. No, no, no, no, no, dummy, I mean like Irish twins.

You guys are Irish, I thought you were Jewish?

We're Black Irish.

-Are they allowed to say that? -And Jewish.

But you guys went to St. Catherine's.

-And Catholic. -And Mexican.

Careful Ken, don't break your brain.

Okay, you know what?

Do you guys ever hang out with Amber?

Amber Jackson?

RIP.

For real, when you get pregnant like that

and then your dude ditches, you're a societal goner.

Yeah, she basically never leaves her mom's place.

Also Mrs. Jackson is like a total booze hound.

And I hear her kid's autistic.

-Oh. -Really?

Okay, all right, let's uh...

let's not.

And he got another chick pregnant in Ohio.

That's a gigantic shit sandwich.

Oh my God, really?

It's all over Facebook.

Oh, uh, Kennedy hasn't been

on Facebook in a few years.

Yeah, I cleansed it from my life.

I'm exclusively on the Gram now.

She has 30,000 followers on Instagram,

so, like, she thinks she's, like, a local celebrity.

Kind of is for this town.

Yeah, you might be right.

I'm sorry!

Hello! Jordan, do you have something to share with the class?

Um, no yeah.

I was just saying that you think you're hot shit,

like you're a local celebrity.

Oh my God, okay, yeah.

It's called being an influencer,

and it's gonna be a full-time job once I hit 100K.

-Okay? -Gotcha.

And then we'll see who's laughing.

I'm way too sober for this.

Ken, want to go shotgun a beer?

Oh my God, yeah.

I'm coming!

Jane?

No, I'm good.

Are you sure?

Yes, I'm sure. Go!

Okay...

I hate it when you guys do that.

You could learn, you know.

Um, I remember you

calling it your super secret sister speak.

No, I did not.

Lacey called it that.

I called it "I fell out of a tree when I was a kid

and didn't speak for three years

so we all learned to sign."

Right, Big Pine.

Forgot that part.

And Lacey made it a game because,

of course she did, she's Lacey.

Whoa, you smoke? You're a smoker now?

Don't tell my parents.

Oh!

How are Dorothy and Louis these days?

They, uh, could be worse.

Oh, great.

Glad to hear it.

Aye, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug!

Chug, chug, chug, chug!

You know, I...

I never learned how to roll a joint.

Too busy writing papers to be rolling them?

Never mind!

Come on!

Yeah, gonna show me?

Education.

So first...

take your paper like so,

and then your filter.

Ooh, fancy.

Hey, listen, Durazo, we're not animals.

Okay.

And then...

Here.

You wanna try?

And then, okay, make sure to keep your finger

and your thumb on the filter

so it doesn't go out of place.

And then just kind of roll the paper back

and forth against itself.

Yeah, like that.

-Like that? -Yep, that's great.

All right.

I'm gonna take it back

just 'cause this part's very tricky.

Okay.

I mean, this is, uh...

the most important part,

this is where you finesse it.

-Finesse. -Yeah.

Okay, so you fold it...

kind of get it tight

and then, um, here,

you want to lick it?

And then here.

Give it one more.

Lick.

-Okay. -Right up.

Nice.

And then pinch the top.

-Like that? -Then, yeah, and then

do a little flick.

Pack it down.

Yeah, look at that.

You're a natural.

I have a good teacher.

I could hear that coming out of my mouth

and I was like, no!

I am very lame!

No, no, it's um...

lame always looked good on you.

So I was kind of surprised

to hear that you were back.

Is it like a gap year, or a...

fancy Euro trip or something?

Not exactly. I, um...

I didn't graduate.

Damn!

Yeah, I failed my last class.

What?

Yeah, it's super funny that my life is--

Wait, Jane The Brain flunked?

What?

Wow, I have not heard that since like fourth grade.

What happened?

I don't know. I just, uh... um...

I got distracted, I guess.

I mean, I gotta say that's pretty bad ass.

Coming from you.

Bad girl Janey. Skipping class, rolling joints.

That's me.

Nah, don't sweat it, you uh,

you just have a couple of credits.

That's not a big deal.

Feels like a big deal.

Nah, you'll get your pedigree.

Don't worry.

Plus, I mean, you've gained a whole summer

to dick around with yours truly.

Come on.

That's pretty great.

All right.

So you wanna smoke this thing or what?

Oh, you don't have to show me

how to do that part.

Oh, you show me how it's done now.

Jordan?

Jordan?

Jord--

Are you all right?

POLICE DEPARTMENT

What's up guys?

I'm here on bea-utiful Little Bear Lake.

We are getting totally lit.

Totally!

And we are celebrating

the return of Little Durazo who we missed so much.

I totally love my little sister!

This one's for you, J!

Chug, chug, chug, chug!

I know what I'm gonna do

to get credit.

What time is it?

6:00.

Why the hell are you waking me up

at 6:00 AM on a Saturday?

You can sleep when you're dead!

I am dead.

No, you're not.

Then kill me.

Get up!

Oh! I'm up, I'm up!

What's up guys--

Oh, goddammit, she posted that?

Listen!

-Totally! -Totally.

I don't think I've heard you say

"totally" like that in your life.

Don't bite your nails.

Well, that's the thing.

See, language shifts based on

circumstances,

environment, emotional state.

The words and phrases that

we don't even realize that we're saying

that we throw into sentences.

It's subconscious.

I'm gonna do a study.

So I can get credit.

So I can graduate.

I'm going to record conversations

between you and Kennedy and Dylan--

Jordan's gonna be grading.

Oh, Jordan!

You're such a good teacher!

Rude!

It's not my fault!

Sound carries on a clear night.

Come on, you've had a crush on him since you were five,

and I would know because I officiated the first wedding.

Toilet paper veil and all.

Can you focus?

I say go for it!

Can you focus?

No, because it's 6:00 AM!

Can you ask Kennedy and Dylan about it?

How about this for a plan?

You...

go do whatever it is that morning people do.

And I will...

help you do whatever it is you just said.

Okay.

But...

only if you promise that you're gonna

try to have fun

and stop beating yourself up.

But, Mom!

I'm serious!

It's the summer of fun!

Like the Beach Boys.

They totally knew what they were talking about.

♪ All of the good intent ♪

♪ And all of my common sense ♪

♪ It takes the fun out of it ♪

♪ Am I always this vigilant? ♪

♪ I've learned to be vigilant ♪

I got it!

What's that?

Oh, the back split.

Oh shit!

Great!

That's just great.

Let me get those. Ow!

-Oh! -Oh shit!

Are you okay?

I just poked myself.

Oh God.

Some days I just wanna quit.

I'm sorry.

I shouldn't say that.

I could babysit sometime.

It's fine, you don't have to say that.

No, I've worked with kids

student teaching.

Difficult kids. Kids with autism.

He's not autistic.

No.

Yeah no, I just--

I wasn't saying--

I just mean he wasn't, um...

Sorry, I meant, uh, kids...

with different, um...

Mm-hmm.

Different challenges.

I'm sorry.

Yeah, I'll think about it.

Thanks.

Come on, nerd!

We're putting holes in our bodies.

I'm in the middle of something.

Yeah, but Kenny just got a new piercing gun!

You guys are gonna look totally amazing with nose piercings.

Nose piercings?

Yeah, the Gram is gonna flip for this

Parent Trap shit.

-We're not twins. -No, I know.

Dylan, what did you call them last night?

Irish twins.

It means that Louis and Dorothy got busy

right after baby number one popped out.

Don't.

Did you ask them?

Yes. We will be your lab rats.

But we were promised a bunch of super fun adventures.

Yes. Jane is committed to fun. Right, Jane?

Okay, I need documented consent

in order to record our conversations and review.

Review what?

Okay, well, I can't fully disclose

because that would defeat the purpose of the study

but I'm not gonna be using any content,

just, um, you know, analyzing speech patterns and, uh...

structure and whatnot.

Uh-huh.

Okay, so I just need you to state your name

and that you consent to Jane Durazo's research study.

Lacey Durazo.

And I consent to Jane Durazo's research study.

Kennedy Clarence.

And I totally consent to Jane Durazo's research study.

Dylan Samuels

and I consent to Jane Durazo's research study.

Thanks.

So what will it be?

Oh, I want my septum done for sure.

Septums are totally in. Hey, what do you want?

-Me? -Yeah.

Oh, no I'm not.

We had a deal.

More like an imposition.

Come on, you can take it out if you don't like it.

Yeah, it'll be super fun.

Swear.

YOLO.

Totally YOLO.

Do it.

-Do it. Do it! Do it! -Fine!

Not 'cause of that!

But I want a normal one just like on the side of my nose.

That's a great choice, you have perfect nostrils.

Thanks?

Let's do this.

Okay.

You do know what you're doing, right?

Oh yeah.

No, I literally did the entire ski team right before States.

Wait, is that way Jordan had his ears pierced

for like a week senior year?

Jane's crushing hard.

Okay, jeez, Lace, how old are we?

I mean, he's totally into you.

You guys last night?

Fricking adorable.

Yeah, he'd hit it.

Okay, you ready?

Just do it.

Dylan, take a pic.

Okay.

Ow! Shit!

I'm sorry! Wait, wait!

-Oh my God, that hurt. -Wait, wait, okay.

Yeah, you just got stabbed.

Okay, your turn.

Okay, three, two, one.

-Are you okay? -Jane?

-Is she okay? -Jane, hey, yo?

You good?

Yeah, sorry, um...

I'm ready.

I already did it.

Oh.

So Little D's got the tough skin.

Hey, you sure you're okay?

Yeah, no, I'm...

How does it look?

Not bad.

Damn J, it looks hot.

It really ups your sex appeal.

No offense.

Kennedy, what the F, it's crooked!

-I'm sorry! -What the--?

Okay, guess I'm a little rusty!

No, fix this!

Lacey!

What have you done to your beautiful faces?

It's just a piercing.

Just take a chill pill.

You want me to take a chill pill?

Yes!

A chill pill, I think you need to relax.

Don't talk to your mother that way.

What is your boss gonna say?

Probably nothing

because my clients

are mostly chimpanzees and lemurs.

Or he may fire me.

Don't monkeys like shiny things?

Well, this is a great strategy.

Oh my God, it's like you're living in the '50s.

We're from the '70s.

-Lacey? -Okay, I'm just

not endangering my job.

When was the last time that you were in downtown?

Because Detroit is filled with people

who have tattoos

and piercings

and blue hair and shit.

Okay, it's an art scene, it's self-expression,

have you ever heard of it?

Oh yeah, great.

Downtown Detroit isn't in bad enough shape,

now we got a bunch of snowflake weirdos

running around down there.

-Lace? -Are you kidding me?

Maybe you should take a chill pill?

-Louis. -I do not have to deal with this.

He cannot just say shit like that!

This is why I'm not well adjusted!

I'll see you next weekend.

Text me!

POLICE DEPARTMENT

Hey!

Hey.

Um, what's your rate?

For babysitting?

What's, uh, what's a normal rate?

$10 an hour?

That's my rate!

Great, um... are you free?

When?

Now.

I got this interview last second,

it's a work from home thing.

I already fed him breakfast,

so just juice and water only.

And he's allergic to peanuts,

not that we...

keep any of that in the house.

Okay.

I'll be back in a couple hours.

My mom's upstairs, not that you're going to see her.

Okay.

Hey!

You be good, all right?

-Thank you, I appreciate it. -Yeah, of course.

-Good luck! -Thanks!

What's that?

♪ The itsy bitsy spider ♪

♪ Went up the water spout ♪

Do you know that one?

♪ Down came the rain and ♪

♪ Washed the spider out ♪

Hey, is there another song that you like?

Vroom! Vroom!

Vroom!

Vroom! Vroom! Vroom! Vroom!

Hey!

-Hey! -Hey little man, how'd it go?

Were you good for Jane?

He was great.

Thank you again so much.

I really appreciate it.

Yeah of course, I'm happy to.

I think that we should

talk about, um...

-What, Theo? -Yeah.

I don't think he's a...

late talker.

Oh no, I know.

Late talker, it's like a blanket term. You know?

I think it might be...

hearing loss.

No, you know what it is?

He actually,

he had a little ear infection

a couple of weeks ago and um...

I think his head's just a little clogged up, that's all.

It's not a big...

I think it might be...

moderate...

to severe.

No, 'cause he loves music.

We dance together all the time.

He's mimicking.

He's copying your motions--

No, you know what? Um, thank you so much...

he's feeling the vibrations in the music.

...for coming by on such short notice.

I really appreciate it.

Yeah.

You wanna climb Big Pine?

Uh...

Oh, I'm sorry, shit, I totally forgot.

No, no, I uh...

maybe, just um... not tonight.

Okay.

Yeah, that's cool.

You don't look so good.

Hey.

Hey.

He's deaf.

I knew that there was something wrong

and I just thought he was gonna grow out of whatever it was.

I thought it was just a phase

with the tantrums and everything and I...

I really convinced myself not to read into it.

God, isn't that stupid?

No.

Yes.

Okay, you're gonna hear this

one a million times, but...

he's going to have a perfectly normal life.

He's gonna communicate.

He's gonna go to college and...

fall in love and...

have a girlfriend that you really hate.

He's gonna get everything he wants out of life.

I'm supposed to start signing with him right away.

I'm sure you probably already know that.

I could teach you.

No.

So I didn't...

graduate.

That's why I'm home.

I think it might, I don't know,

I think it might help me.

Sorry, that sounded...

That sounded stupid.

Do mornings work for you?

7:00 AM?

Meet at our dock?

Sure.

I think it might be 7:00 now.

Yeah.

♪ Trust me ♪

♪ Trust me when I say that I was innocent ♪

PARTICIPANTS CONVERSATIONS

FILLER WORDS DATE/TIME NOTES

UM

Um, we have to take one of these everyday.

You're such a sucker for that kinda stuff.

Isn't film like $2 a picture?

Okay, yeah, maybe I'm the sucker.

Yeah.

♪ And I'll be unfaithful and it will be unfair ♪

♪ And you will be torn in two ♪

♪ Well I've got some news for you ♪

♪ I don't break hearts ♪

♪ I don't do funny business ♪

♪ I just ride in cars and watch them ♪

Okay, your, um, "excited" is still looking pretty scared

but we're getting there.

♪ I just ride in cars and watch them ♪

Are you just gonna record everything?

Yeah! It's better to cast a wider net.

Oh my God, my mom says that about men all the time.

I totally agree with you.

-TOTALLY-And her, technically.

Facial expression's a big part of it too.

What if I don't know what to say?

Um...

Um...

Sorry, she's 18. It's fair game.

Plus, she's totally into polyamory.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

Jane!

Penis.

Penis.

Penis.

Penis.

Penis.

-Penis. -Penis.

Penis.

Penis!

-Penis! -Penis!

Penis!

-Penis! -Penis!

-Penis! -Penis!

Penis!

Hey!

Hey! No yelling "penis"!

Hey!

Come on!

So think of something

you're scared of more than heights and then imagine--

-Sharks! -Okay great!

And imagine there's sharks all around you.

And then...by comparison...

Don't worry.

You can't just say you're gonna sponsor my post

and then not sponsor my post.

I already hashtagged "ad."

Pops forgot his dinner.

Be right back.

Okay.

I'll say hi to the pigs for you.

Jane!

Yeah?

Oh, sorry.

Um...

Pig

Cow

Sheep

Great job!

Thank you! Thank you!

You're welcome!

I'm teaching him to swim.

He's a little...

Oh God, um...

...fish.

I like mine better, but whatever.

Me too. Yours is great.

You should suggest that to

the sign language committee.

He's still...

No, it takes time.

Yeah.

It's just so personal, you know.

Like it is an intimate conversation and...

you really have to talk with all of you.

Yeah, I mean you really have to,

you really have to focus. You know?

Like,

if I want to say something to you

and you're in the other room or you're on your phone

or you're, you know,

doing whatever important things you have with your life.

-Well, yeah. -And I wanna say something to you,

you don't really have a choice, like you're going to hear me.

But with sign language,

you know,

there's no bullshit.

You are like in that conversation.

Spoken language isn't like that.

I mean, it kind of is.

At least it really should be.

Uh, so, uh...

I made you something.

Made?

Yes, I'm very crafty.

In case you forgot.

I do remember.

It's just like a...I don't know.

It's stupid,

but I thought that you might like it.

You don't like it?

No, I, I...

I love it. It's uh...

No, I'm just tired.

Okay, I mean, you don't have to.

No, I really. It's...I really...

I love it. I...

Thank you.

Yeah.

What happened, Jane?

Jane?

Jane? Jane?

Don't bite your nails.

What happened? What happened?

-What happened? -What happened?

-Theo? -What happened, Jane?

What happened? Jane?

-Jane? -Jane.

Jane. Don't lose it.

Oh my God, I cannot believe that I'm up before you.

I have to head back to the D,

but we were thinking about climbing Big Pine today.

Thoughts?

Maybe later.

Come on, I know you're not a big fan

but you're never gonna feel ready, you know?

I'm just super hungover.

Yeah, you and me both.

Um, okay, well...

I'll just see you next weekend?

Yep.

Cool.

Well, you don't have a fever, but...

okay Blue Jay, we'll let you sleep.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRENDON

Honey.

Amber and Theo stopped by.

I'll tell her to come back later.

What are you doing?

Smoking.

This is where I met Kennedy.

I mean, I always knew who she was.

But officially...

you know.

I remember.

Oh shit.

You were a Creamy Freeze girl.

Every summer.

Didn't you give Kyle Irwin

a BJ behind the slushy machine?

Nope.

That was Sarah Carlton.

Oh, my bad!

Wait!

I heard that she got her nipple pierced

and then it split in Roger Jones' face.

Why do you do that?

Say gross shit about people?

Jeez, someone's on the rag.

No, I couldn't sleep.

Sorry.

That was pretty gross.

I don't know.

What?

Why I say gross shit about people.

Do you want a ride?

I can throw your bike in the back.

No, I'm, uh...

I'm good.

Cool.

Well...

I'll see you tomorrow, maybe?

Yeah. Maybe.

Hey!

Jane, come on!

Come celebrate America's birth with us.

It's the fourth, it's time to get weird!

Stop it!

Stop.

I know you're not actually sick.

Yes I am.

Go away.

You wanna tell me what's going on?

Okay, whatever.

Come down to the dock and shout for us

if you need anything.

Feel better.

So he would have me come in and weed his front lawn...

and this young one would-- I was always noticing

she was driving by on her bike.

Riding my bike every Sunday.

Oh my God. Hi, Jane!

-Hey! -Hey!

How are you feeling, honey?

She lives.

Come here!

-Better. -Yay! Join us.

Perfect timing, we were about to go in.

Been a long day on the water for us old folks.

Oh, I know you're not calling me old.

No, I am not old, don't call me old.

Honey, it's time. Let's go!

It's time?

Oh, it's time, kids.

We missed you.

Lucky lady.

And this is just what it was like in 12th grade, guys.

The magic's still there.

Oh, I'm glad you're feeling better, Baby J.

My little Blue Jay.

Don't stay up too late.

Good night, guys.

Now you kids don't do anything we wouldn't do, right?

-No way. -Cheers to that.

Oh stairs, why do we have these stairs?

You want me to carry you?

Please!

I can carry you.

It's showtime, baby.

Finish it.

I literally haven't gone skinny dipping

since junior prom.

-I feel like I'm 16. -Kennedy, you literally

went skinny dipping last week.

Oh my God, yeah,

but I meant with this many people.

Not just like by myself.

♪ Can you see ♪

♪ By the dawn's early light ♪

Oh my God, okay!

No, no, no!

Oh my God, you prude.

Leave her alone.

Wanna see the moon?

It's right there.

No, it's right here!

Oh, my God!

Okay, okay, wait!

Let's play truth or dare.

I'll go first.

Jordan, truth or dare?

-Dare. -Okay.

I dare that you go under the dock with Jane

and do whatever you want.

Oh, I don't wanna play.

Come on, you have to.

Jay, play, play.

Come on, let's go appease the people.

Ooh.

Appease the people, yes!

Right this way.

This seems like a good spot.

We don't have to--

Right, we're just--

I mean, not that I...

Yeah.

-Yeah. -Yeah.

-I'm sorry. -No, it's uh...

No, you're not--

No, I'm sorry, it's not.

It's not that I--

No, it's okay.

-I'm sorry. -No, what is it?

I'm sorry.

No, no, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, no, I shouldn't have.

No, it's not.

No, it's okay, never mind.

-No, it's all right. -No, it's fine.

No, sorry, sorry.

I'm sorry.

Where are you going?

I'm sorry!

Jane? Jane, Jane, are you okay?

-What happened? -I don't know.

-I'm sorry.-What did you do?

Nothing, I didn't do anything.

-I'm sorry! -It's a panic attack!

-My brother gets these. -Jane, Jane, Jane, Jane!

It's okay!

Jane, Jane, Jane!

-I'm sorry! -It's okay!

It's okay! It's okay!

Let's go! Come on, come on. Let's go.

It's okay, it's okay.

Watch your head.

Come on.

He swam yesterday.

Without water wings.

Congratulations!

That's exciting!

How is the assignment?

Good.

That's great!

Is everything okay?

Not really.

Why? What's up?

Something happened.

What happened?

Hey. Hey, hey, hey!

Sign language only.

Are you okay?

Yes.

Do you want to talk?

I don't know.

I'm here.

I don't know if I can.

Is it school?

Kind of.

Why I flunked. Part of it.

I panicked last night.

I scared Jordan,

my sister, everyone.

It's okay.

I haven't told anyone.

Rape

Jane. Jane...

No speaking.

Okay.

I'm not okay.

Does Lacey know?

No.

Does anyone know?

No.

Can I hug you?

Yes. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

It's okay!

I'm sorry!

It's okay. You're okay.

It was someone...

in my class.

You could've...

you could've told me.

I didn't even really know if it was.

I didn't know how.

I'm sorry.

Oh, come on.

This is serious, Jane.

No shit!

I've been thinking of reporting it.

To the police?

Isn't that what you're supposed to do when you get...

I'm not saying you shouldn't,

it's just that it's...

hard to go through, and...

it's just, I don't know if that's what you should

be focusing on right now.

Wouldn't you?

I don't know.

Hi!

I'm sorry about last night.

I just wanted to come over and say that.

I haven't been sleeping and...

I mean it seems like it was more than that.

I mean, it kind of seemed like it was me.

You know, things can go back to the way that they were.

There doesn't need to be this like

weird thing between us.

Um, you mind if I see it really quick?

Why did you do that?

It's cool.

It's cool?

Yeah.

Whatever, Jordan.

No, wait, hang on. Hang on.

It's okay, like, you don't want it.

You don't know what I want.

You didn't e--

You gave that to me, that wa--

That wasn't yours.

Whatever, Jordan.

Wait, woah...

-Hey. -Hey, morning.

Hey.

What's up?

She told you?

Lacey!

She left for work.

What did she say?

Uh, she said that you wanted to go to the police.

-That's not what I said. -That you were thinking about going--

She told us because she cares, Jane.

If you want me to handle it, I can handle it for you.

-Dad. -Janey, this is a crime.

Let's not blow this out of proportion.

This is not the time for this.

No, this is the time.

No, we talked about this.

-If we wait-- -Honey, do you want some breakfast?

-No, I'm not hungry. -Can we make you some eggs?

-I'm not hungry. -Maybe some waffles? Some toast?

-No! -You need to eat something.

I don't want to.

I'll take some eggs.

Eggs it is.

Everyone gets eggs.

-I don't want anyth-- -Let your mother make you some eggs.

Sit down.

I don't wanna talk about it.

You don't have to.

Here's the salt.

Um, I'm gonna make some toast also.

We've got raspberry jam, and...

if you want grape jam, we've got that too.

No.

I can go with you if you want.

-Do you want me to go with you? -Is that really necessary?

To call the police right now?

We are getting the police involved.

Maybe there's a better option.

-There is no chance in hell-- -Jane, is this what--

Please!

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Can you just...

Can you...just let me handle it.

Please?

Can you just... leave it?

You really have to stop biting your nails.

Can you not tell me what to do for like a second?

Dad told you I was here?

Mom.

I shouldn't have told them, I know.

I'm sorry, okay?

You should be.

Hello, I'm, uh...

Officer Fitzpatrick.

Here to take your statement, uh?

Jane.

Jane.

Alright, and you are, uh?

Oh, Lacey.

I'm her sister.

Okay, Jane and Lacey, nice to meet you.

So you're...

here to report an assault?

Yes.

I'm sorry to hear that.

We can take your statement and then put you in contact with the

correct jurisdiction and they'll take it from there.

Do you know the name of the person?

Yes.

Theo Thompson.

Thompson.

And, do you have...

any of his contact information?

I mean, not like a, I don't have his phone number or anything.

I'm friends with him on social media.

That would be helpful.

Oh yeah.

Oh, yeah, um...

I'm gonna need you to, um...

Oh, right, yeah, sorry.

Are you gonna take notes on that the, um...

the whole time?

On what?

I mean, you don't have like a...

like a laptop or something?

No, no.

Good old fashioned paper.

Sorry, I've just, uh...

I've just never done this before, you know?

Oh.

Well I'm glad to hear that.

So you-- Sorry, what happens?

What happens next?

Yeah, I'll find someone here in the office.

They'll transcribe it.

And then they'll pass it off to the detectives

and then they will open an investigation.

A, uh, detective.

Okay.

Yeah, I'm sorry.

I should have explained more, um...

I'm gonna take your statement

and then I will contact Theo and get his statement.

And then we'll open an investigation

and we'll contact any witnesses that you both can offer.

-Witnesses? -Yeah.

Anyone that might have been around the night of the incident.

Uh...

Well, I mean, it was just...

us.

Well, anyone that was there before or after the incident.

See, the job of the detective

is to get as much information as they possibly can.

He'll take over.

I'm just here to do the initial statement.

All right, but you're gonna

you're gonna contact my friends and his friends and

people who were there and, um...

tell them?

No, oh no.

We won't tell them anything.

They'll ask them questions about the night, location,

if they saw you with Mr. Patson.

Thompson.

Thompson, sorry.

So you, uh...

you take my statement and then what?

Well, then you give your statement to the detective.

Again?

Yes.

You don't have to do this.

Yeah, it's entirely up to you.

Do you need a minute?

No.

You wanna continue?

Yes.

Okay, do you remember the date and location of the incident?

January 19th. It was a house.

Uh-huh. Okay. We'll need the address.

Can you describe the events of the incident?

Where should I start?

You can start anywhere that you feel

may be relevant.

Anything you remember.

Okay.

Relevant.

Relevant.

Uh, okay, uh...

Well, it was...

my friend Brendon's birthday.

I don't know if I'd call him a friend.

He was just in my class.

Theo was friends with him too. I...

He wasn't really a friend either.

He was just, um...

you know, around. I...

saw him out at like

parties and stuff.

Anyway, we were all in the same class.

Sorry, I should have said that first.

No, it's--

Anyway, we got to the party.

I had had a couple drinks before.

Oh, sorry, I was with my roommate.

We were drinking gin because

she had gotten it for her birthday the weekend before

and it was a whole...

Sorry.

A little off track. I...

Anyway. We got to the party--

How many drinks did you have at the party?

Five or six drinks probably.

I mean, I know I had four before, so, um...

six.

Is that how much you drink on a normal night out?

Why is that relevant?

After five or six drinks, do you feel fairly intoxicated?

Yeah.

Okay.

After that it's, um...

it's a little foggy.

We were in a room.

Can you be more specific?

On the second floor at the end of the hallway.

Okay.

And that's where...

you know.

I'm gonna need you to tell me what happened.

That's where he...

raped me.

Can you describe the physical?

Did his penis enter your vagina?

I'm sorry, can I read that?

-Excuse me? -It looks like you're writing the lines

really close together, it's just kind of hard to read.

Like, if someone else were transcribing it, it might be too hard to read.

I can transcribe it if--

Can I just, do you have a laptop? Can I just?

Or I can write you something and give it to you or...

Yeah, I can use a laptop

if it makes you feel more comfortable. You can...

You can send me something as well.

Yeah. It's just that, hmm...

Um...

Miss?

-Jane! -What?

You don't need to...

do this.

I know.

I keep telling myself what happened, but I just...

don't know.

I don't actually know what it was.

I remember...

kissing him.

I wanted to, and then...

and then it's foggy.

What if I was just drunk?

What if I'm overreacting?

Just being dramatic.

You're not being dramatic.

You don't know.

I don't know, I...

I was drunk and kissing him.

I kissed him. I did that.

He was playing with my hair.

He tucked a piece behind my ear, and...

then he...

he took my shoes off.

I was confused.

And then I kissed him again, but it was...

later. It felt...

it felt different.

Like, off.

And then he was over me.

I don't think he meant to, but

his hands were in my hair and I just...

I couldn't move my head.

I just kept looking up at these lights.

And then I was in the bathroom puking my brains out.

And he held my hair back.

And the house was empty, and...

then somehow I was...

in a car going home and...

the driver said

"It's so nice of him to pay for a car for you like that."

"All the way across campus."

"Most guys, most..."

"most one night stands wouldn't do that."

"He must've had a crush on me."

"A real one."

I don't even know if he knows.

Or what he knows or what he thinks. I...

I don't wanna know, I hadn't...

I hadn't thought about it until I came here which is so

fucking stupid of me.

-It's not stupid. -I'm at a police station!

Of course he's gonna find out!

That's why I'm here, right?

Well, you don't have to--

I woke up and I went to the clinic

because I knew that I could get Plan B for free

and I didn't want to blow 50 bucks.

They started asking me all these questions.

And I didn't remember having sex, but I felt like I did.

And I...

And I just kept saying no.

No I didn't...

know if we used protection.

I didn't know if I said yes.

I didn't remember.

No, I didn't remember.

I didn't.

I just-- I didn't know.

And then they asked me if I wanted a kit.

A rape kit.

And I told them, it wasn't that, I was just drunk.

But I still asked if they thought it was a good idea

for my health and shit, like free Plan B, and--

and they said that if I did it,

I could get preventative medication for gonorrhea

and shit, like antibiotics, if I did it.

So I did it, and...

and the nurse was so nice.

She looked at me like Mom does when...

Dad says stupid shit.

You know, like she understands but she can't do anything about it.

And they measured my hickeys

like I was battered or some shit.

They were just hickeys, I've seen worse ones on my friends.

And they took pictures of everything.

They took this janky video camera

and they put it between my legs.

And I took a handful of pills,

like a whole handful, like 10 pills.

And when I got home, I was late, and I felt so...

sick from all the meds.

I'm so sorry.

I missed class.

And I kept missing class, and I was so fucking angry.

Why was I being like this?

Why? Why?

People black out and have sex all the time.

Why did I have to think that something bad happened to me?

Why did that nurse have to start asking me questions?

Why couldn't I just go to class?

God, it felt like a mistake going to that clinic.

Maybe if I hadn't gone, I would've just forgotten about it.

Maybe because I made a big deal about it,

it became a bigger deal than it needed to be.

And then I failed my class.

I went, but I couldn't listen,

because he was just sitting in the front row

with Brendon dicking around.

And Brendon probably knew.

And what else did I do that night?

Who else saw me?

Where was my roommate?

Why? Why?

Why did she leave without me?

Why should it matter?

I'm a fucking adult! I mean...

Did anyone take pictures?

Maybe I wanted to have sex with him!

How should I know?

I was a mess and now we're at a fucking police station!

I'm sorry.

Sorry.

You look like mom and dad.

How you doing?

And my therapist.

You don't have a therapist.

Isn't that what rape girls do?

Get therapists.

It's not a bad idea.

I have one.

Since when?

Since vet school got insane.

A lot of people have therapists.

Dylan has one.

Yeah, well Dylan needs one.

Aren't you trying to become a speech therapist?

Want anything?

Beer.

If you have it.

I don't.

What?

Since when?

Since I switched to wine.

We've been drinking beer all summer.

Yeah, you guys like it.

I'm easy.

Sorry you've been slumming it with us.

You decorated.

Yeah.

I got tired of playing "Peter Pan" with band posters.

Who's this from?

Oh, um...

Coworkers, kind of.

In Colorado?

Yeah, I got into this, um...

fancy little research retreat.

They're trying to make me feel included.

It sounds like a big deal.

Why didn't you tell me?

Well, I didn't go.

Why not?

Just...

I don't get it.

The whole you coming home thing.

It just didn't seem important.

Jesus.

You don't have to do that all the time.

Do what?

Be the hero.

Oh, bite me, Janey!

Oh.

No, "I'm Lacey and I'm a fucking martyr!"

Stop!

You are such a good big sister, Lacey!

Always looking out for little Janey!

I was worried about you!

Well, fuck you, Lacey! I can take care of myself!

Apparently not!

I'm sorry.

Sorry.

I shouldn't have said that.

Why do you think I didn't tell you?

'Cause I didn't want you to look at me the way that you're looking at me right now.

And it's not gonna just go away.

I know, I've...

I've worked with people who've seen all kinds of shit.

And people just...

look at them like they are...

their illness or disability.

And now...

to you and Mom and Dad, and...

everyone else that I tell

or who finds out, I just...

I am this thing.

No!

No, you're not.

You're...

You're Jane.

And Little Durazo and Jane The Brain.

And Blue Jay

and Janey and J, you're all of that!

You're not...

you're not this.

I don't want to be anything right now.

SIX WEEKS LATER

Hey, big day.

I have to be on the road by 9:00.

Shut up, I'm driving.

You don't have to.

I said shut up.

Good morning!

I'm just turning in my research.

I won't know if I graduate for another few weeks.

Okay, fine, so consider it a vote of confidence.

Thank you.

So what's next?

I literally turn back around and come home.

Obviously!

I mean like big picture here!

What's next? You know?

What is that?

I mean...

Grad school?

Okay, cool.

Around here, or?

No, I think I do still wanna get out of here for awhile.

Yeah.

I'm sorry.

No, I'm not.

-Hey! -It's so early...

Okay, all right.

This is kind of nice.

I'm not gonna make a habit of this, but it's nice.

Hey, would...

Would you guys feel up for climbing Big Pine?

You sure?

Let me just check on Theo and I'll meet you.

Well...

time to rally the troops.

Jane?

Yeah, sorry.

Damn. F that.

What?

You've been listening to us so closely all summer

but you really don't listen to yourself?

It's just like, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

Okay, I'm not trying to--

Well, how about you try not to?

Try saying I'm not sorry.

I'm not sorry.

I'm not sorry.

I'm not playing the Penis Game with you right now.

I'm not sorry.

I'm not sorry.

I'm not sorry!

I'm not sorry!

-I'm not sorry! -I'm not sorry!

-I'm not sorry! -I'm not sorry!

I'm not sorry!

She's not sorry.

It actually looks bigger than it did when I was a kid.

How is that possible?

Uh... Amber, we should, uh...

we should go look for pine cones.

-Yes. -Yeah.

I love pine cones.

They're so cool.

What?

Hey.

Hi.

Uh...

I'm sorry that I haven't really been around that much.

And, uh, I'm sorry that, um--

I'm really sick of people telling me they're sorry.

Sick of saying it and sick of...

talking about it.

I believe you.

Thanks.

I tried to find the other one

but I think a fish might've eaten it.

Did you make this?

Yeah.

It's a lucky fish.

So are we cool?

Yeah.

We're cool.

I found the stragglers!

Hey, bag boy.

What?

Check it out.

What am I looking at?

Ooh, wait.

Holy shit, Ken! 100K!

-What? -Business is booming baby!

All right, that's pretty good!

-That's impressive! -Thank you. Thanks.

I mean, I do have to hand it to Janey.

She really did give me that early summer boost

with that nose piercing pic.

Like I said...

perfect nostrils.

But now I've got to start strategizing for fall!

Ugh, pumpkin spice lattes and shit.

-Babe! Ew! -So you guys can brawl later

but are you kids ready to do this?

I was born ready!

And that's actually a fact

'cause I was born two weeks early.

Early doesn't mean ready.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

You're jealous that you were overcooked.

So, I'm afraid of heights.

Oh, I have strategies for that.

Oh, I wanna hear this.

I'm gonna go ahead.

All right, gather around.

Okay. So first we're gonna wanna get really high.

-Oh. -Because when you're high...

Dylan, slow down!

Ah! You snooze, you lose!

You good?

Yeah.

-It's...careful. -I got it.

These top branches have more sap on them.

Welcome!

I've never made it all the way up here before.

Man.

I used to climb this thing so much.

I got so good at it when I was a kid.

It's muscle memory now.

Sounds cheesy, but, um...

it really feels like the top of the world.

You know...

my dad told me that you came into the station last month.

Great.

I don't want to upset you.

Yeah, I don't, uh...

I really don't think you can right now. I'm feeling...

pretty numb.

Pretty ballsy of you.

To, to, to go to the cops.

Thanks.

I didn't follow through though.

I didn't...

say anything.

I didn't give an official statement.

But you went.

Yeah.

I wish...

that that was something I had done.

Back in high school...ski meet.

I never told anybody.

But, um...

thanks.

Yeah.

How we communicate

reflects the cultures we're raised in.

The communities we engage with.

Good luck!

Our conversational style is unique to who we are.

Good luck!

Communication was born out of necessity.

It helps us survive.

But more importantly, it...

helps us live.

It's more than just the definitions behind the words we say.

It's not just yes or no.

It's in our bodies.

Our intentions.

Speech is rarely fluent.

No matter what language we speak.

We pause.

Repeat ourselves.

Fill silences with words and phrases.

Communication cannot be clear

without seeking clarity from the other side.

Speech is not perfect

because we are not perfect.

But that's no excuse to sacrifice

our most powerful words.

Sorry.

Come in!

Just collecting my things.

Summer term.

Freshmen. Not the brightest of bulbs.

I appreciate you coming in person.

You know I'm old school.

You'll be presenting for an audience of one.

I should have had my 102 stay.

Maybe even had a Q&A.

Not sure I'd be the best example.

All things considered.

Everybody falls down, Jane. It's part of life.

This is just a blip for you.

I know you didn't want to talk about it at the time.

What happened.

But something did happen?

Yeah.

And how's that now?

Is everything all right?

No.

But it's getting better.

Good.

Your paper was very thorough.

Your conclusions were fresh and sound.

I'm excited to hear what you have to say.

Floor's yours.

♪ No feeling's ever final ♪

♪ No feeling's ever final ♪

♪ No feeling's ever final ♪

♪ No feeling's ever final ♪

♪ No feeling's ever final ♪