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♪ [HOUSE OF 7 JOYS BY
MACK DAVID DEVOL PLAYING]
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(MALE CHORUS) ♪ on the
street of many pleasures ♪
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(FEMALE CHORUS) ♪
street of many pleasures ♪
4
00:00:14,515 --> 00:00:16,225
♪ stands the House of 7 Joys ♪
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♪ House of 7 Joys ♪
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♪ like you see it in the movies ♪
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♪ see it in the movies ♪
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♪ it's for groovy girls and boys ♪
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♪ groovy girls and boys ♪
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♪ in this oriental palace ♪
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♪ pa, pa, pa ♪
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♪ you are welcome night and day ♪
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♪ pa pa pa ♪
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♪ recommended by Matt Helm ♪
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♪ pa pa pa ♪
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♪ and by the A.A.A. ♪
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♪ Ah so, ah so velly velly nice ♪
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♪ on the street of many pleasures ♪
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♪ pa pa pa ♪
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♪ in the House of 7 Joys ♪
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♪ pa pa pa ♪
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♪ many times you feel like swingin' ♪
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♪ there are 7 clingin' toys ♪
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(BOTH) ♪ pa pa pa ♪
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♪ oriental relaxation ♪
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♪ pa pa pa ♪
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♪ chinese psychedelic cults ♪
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♪ pa pa pa pa ♪
29
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♪ recommended by Matt Helm ♪
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♪ pa pa pa ♪
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♪ and only for adults ♪
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♪ ah so, ah so velly velly nice ♪
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♪ on the street of many pleasures ♪
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♪ street of many pleasures ♪
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♪ in the House of 7 Joys ♪
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♪ House of 7 Joys ♪
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♪ you will dig the flower chicks ♪
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♪ dig the flower chicks ♪
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♪ that the management employs ♪
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♪ pa pa pa ♪
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♪ every little lotus blossom ♪
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♪ pa pa pa ♪
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♪ as she greets you she will say ♪
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♪ pa pa pa ♪
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♪ recommended by Matt Helm ♪
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♪ pa pa pa ♪
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♪ and by the A.A.A. ♪
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♪ Ah so, ah so velly velly nice ♪
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♪ ah so ♪
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[TRAIN HORN BLARING]
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With $1 billion in gold
shining at me, I feel reckless.
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I'll open for a dime.
53
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Well, with $1 billion in gold, I'm in.
54
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[TRAIN WHEELS CLATTERING]
55
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[SNAPS FINGERS]
56
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Contact. All elements.
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Operation Rainbow is entering phase 1.
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Execute.
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[ENGINE REVVING] (LINKA) Repeat. Execute.
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[TRAIN APPROACHING]
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[HORN BLARING]
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[BRAKES SQUEALING]
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This isn't a scheduled stop.
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No sweat, men.
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[TRAIN HORN BLARING]
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Relax, men. Everything's ok.
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00:05:31,706 --> 00:05:33,250
[GUNS FIRING]
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Red alert! Ice! Red alert...
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10 seconds behind schedule.
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Is that catastrophic?
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Yes. I deplore sloppiness.
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Nelson? Macdonald. Macdonald!
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All sections from 6 through
18 are on emergency standby.
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00:06:54,789 --> 00:06:56,416
I'm picking up Matt Helm.
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Phase 2: intercept Macdonald. Repeat.
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(CONTINI) Phase 2. Intercept Macdonald.
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Yes, Your Excellency. Go.
78
00:07:10,221 --> 00:07:11,806
[ENGINE REVVING]
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00:07:11,848 --> 00:07:13,725
What if they can't?
80
00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:17,228
If we can delay the American
counterforce by that much,
81
00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:20,649
it will add precious minutes to
each phase of Operation Rainbow.
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00:07:31,076 --> 00:07:32,619
[TIRES SQUEALING]
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[TIRES SKIDDING]
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00:07:43,088 --> 00:07:44,965
Macdonald, I.C.E.
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Establish roadblocks
to pick up black sedan,
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2 occupants, Maryland plates.
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Matt.
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Matt!
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[BEEPING]
90
00:08:22,585 --> 00:08:24,087
Oh, the poor boy,
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he's so tired.
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[MOANS]
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♪ [RED SAILS IN THE SUNSET
BY NAT KING COLE PLAYING]
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♪ Red sails in the sunset ♪
95
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♪ way out in the west ♪
96
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♪ they named you long distance ♪
97
00:09:02,959 --> 00:09:05,670
♪ cause your switchboard's the best ♪
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00:09:17,849 --> 00:09:21,102
will you try his radio band?
99
00:09:21,144 --> 00:09:23,354
I can't get through to him.
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[BEEPING]
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I can't reach him either, Mac.
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♪ Oh, how we'll dance ♪
103
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♪ on the night that we're wed ♪
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♪ we'll have to keep dancing ♪
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♪ or you'll burn up our bed ♪
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00:10:15,406 --> 00:10:19,702
♪ grab your coat, get your pail ♪
107
00:10:19,744 --> 00:10:23,123
♪ let me take you in the barn, dear ♪
108
00:10:24,833 --> 00:10:27,585
♪ just sit back and watch ♪
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00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:31,589
♪ 'cause I found a cow who gives scotch ♪
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[CAR HORN BLARING]
111
00:10:49,274 --> 00:10:50,567
Hey, Mac, glad you dropped by.
112
00:10:50,608 --> 00:10:52,026
I want you to meet some cute little...
113
00:10:52,068 --> 00:10:53,903
No, never mind.
114
00:10:53,945 --> 00:10:55,905
But I'm paying those girls double
time. You know what it costs
115
00:10:55,947 --> 00:10:57,198
to double-time all of them?
116
00:10:57,240 --> 00:10:58,324
Yeah, yeah. Get in.
117
00:10:58,366 --> 00:10:59,242
You do? Okay.
118
00:11:05,874 --> 00:11:08,168
Mac. Mac. You gotta turn around.
119
00:11:08,209 --> 00:11:10,003
S-somebody left my phone off the hook.
120
00:11:10,044 --> 00:11:11,880
Yeah. And I know who that somebody was.
121
00:11:11,921 --> 00:11:14,465
Now shut up and listen.
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$1 billion in American
gold en route to london
123
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was stolen from a train in Denmark.
124
00:11:19,345 --> 00:11:21,556
It's panic time in every
money market in the world,
125
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,975
if the story breaks.
126
00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:27,437
So, we can't send in a task force.
127
00:11:27,478 --> 00:11:30,398
It's got to be a one-man job.
128
00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:33,359
Uh, let me guess who you got in mind.
129
00:12:22,283 --> 00:12:23,743
[BUZZING]
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Yes, Operation Rainbow
has entered phase 3
131
00:12:43,388 --> 00:12:45,974
precisely on schedule.
132
00:12:46,015 --> 00:12:51,229
You may notify our brokers
in bombay, ceylon, and tokyo
133
00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:53,606
that the gold will not be...
134
00:12:53,648 --> 00:12:57,277
Repeat, not be delivered
to london on monday.
135
00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:05,076
[FLAMENCO MUSIC PLAYING ON T.V.]
136
00:13:05,159 --> 00:13:07,578
We've got one lead from Interpol.
137
00:13:19,507 --> 00:13:21,217
That's where it's at.
138
00:13:29,767 --> 00:13:32,562
(MAC) Count Massimo Contini.
139
00:13:32,645 --> 00:13:34,605
Now you name it, he probably owns it.
140
00:13:34,647 --> 00:13:38,735
Oil, steel, railroads,
munitions in a dozen countries.
141
00:13:38,776 --> 00:13:41,738
A multimillionaire,
aiming at a multibillion.
142
00:13:51,164 --> 00:13:52,707
I like his style.
143
00:13:54,751 --> 00:13:56,252
Lola Medina.
144
00:13:57,962 --> 00:13:59,172
[BEEPING]
145
00:14:01,382 --> 00:14:06,387
The office of the president
of the United States.
146
00:14:06,429 --> 00:14:10,058
Mr. Macdonald, because of
our balance of payment deficits,
147
00:14:10,099 --> 00:14:12,352
the gold cannot be replaced.
148
00:14:12,393 --> 00:14:14,145
It must be recovered.
149
00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:17,982
Our best estimate is this:
150
00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:20,443
from the time Mr. Helm
arrives in Copenhagen
151
00:14:20,485 --> 00:14:23,571
he will have 48 hours to
accomplish his mission.
152
00:14:25,406 --> 00:14:27,116
Is there anything else, Mr. President?
153
00:14:27,158 --> 00:14:28,993
(PRESIDENT) no, that is all.
154
00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:31,621
(WELLINGTON) that's all, Mr. Macdonald.
155
00:14:31,662 --> 00:14:33,414
♪ [MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING]
156
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:38,086
(MAC) Now, Lola Medina
got her severance pay
157
00:14:38,127 --> 00:14:39,796
several months ago.
158
00:14:41,214 --> 00:14:42,757
[GLASS SMASHING]
159
00:14:46,427 --> 00:14:47,720
He fired her?
160
00:14:49,931 --> 00:14:51,682
Mmm-hmm.
161
00:14:51,724 --> 00:14:54,227
But he had this waiting in the wings.
162
00:14:54,268 --> 00:14:55,520
[BUTTON CLICKS]
163
00:14:55,561 --> 00:14:57,230
4.
164
00:14:57,271 --> 00:14:58,314
[CLATTERING]
165
00:14:58,356 --> 00:15:00,316
All of it, my dear.
166
00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:07,448
Oh, I really like his style.
167
00:15:07,490 --> 00:15:09,075
(MAC) Linka Karensky.
168
00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:12,245
And remember,
169
00:15:12,286 --> 00:15:15,039
she's about as gentle as a barracuda.
170
00:15:16,249 --> 00:15:17,250
[EXPLODES]
171
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[HISSING]
172
00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:28,803
It's highly volatile.
173
00:15:28,845 --> 00:15:31,222
Disappears in 15 or 20 seconds.
174
00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:33,516
20 seconds. Hardly
seems worth the trouble.
175
00:15:33,558 --> 00:15:35,643
Anyone exposed to it
without these goggles
176
00:15:35,685 --> 00:15:37,437
is blinded for at least
a minute and a half.
177
00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:39,397
It's enough time to do anything.
178
00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:41,983
You'll use your standard
cover: freelance photographer.
179
00:15:42,024 --> 00:15:44,193
This switch activates
a smoke ejection unit.
180
00:15:44,235 --> 00:15:47,321
Matt, we have one prayer.
181
00:15:47,363 --> 00:15:52,785
The Danish tourist bureau is trying
to get you into Contini's chateau.
182
00:15:52,827 --> 00:15:54,495
To take pretty pictures?
183
00:15:54,537 --> 00:15:56,289
To find out whatever you can.
184
00:15:56,372 --> 00:15:57,415
[PHONE BUZZING]
185
00:15:57,457 --> 00:15:58,541
Hello.
186
00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:01,043
Contini's our only lead, Matt.
187
00:16:01,085 --> 00:16:03,254
Nelson, scramble your phone.
188
00:16:03,296 --> 00:16:05,047
[HIGH-PITCHED HUMMING]
189
00:16:05,089 --> 00:16:07,175
Any report from the
Danish tourist bureau?
190
00:16:07,216 --> 00:16:08,176
Negative, Mac.
191
00:16:10,011 --> 00:16:12,513
Well, we can't wait any longer.
192
00:16:12,555 --> 00:16:15,141
And your chance of
finding Contini is nil.
193
00:16:15,183 --> 00:16:17,935
Oh, but you're gonna
make sure he finds me.
194
00:16:20,605 --> 00:16:23,941
Nelson, break Matt's cover.
195
00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:26,194
You've got to be trying to get rid of me.
196
00:16:26,235 --> 00:16:29,280
Alert the network in zone 3
that Matt's on his way to Denmark
197
00:16:29,322 --> 00:16:31,282
to recover that $1 billion in gold.
198
00:16:31,324 --> 00:16:33,117
Just one thing. What if Contini's, uh...
199
00:16:33,159 --> 00:16:35,036
Well, what if he ain't the guy?
200
00:16:35,077 --> 00:16:37,497
Then whoever's got that
gold will be right on your tail.
201
00:16:37,538 --> 00:16:39,248
We'll give you every protection we can.
202
00:16:39,290 --> 00:16:41,000
This is your mini-copter.
203
00:16:41,042 --> 00:16:44,045
It's very simple, Matt.
2 universal joints,
204
00:16:44,086 --> 00:16:46,964
3 master lock screws,
and you're in business.
205
00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:50,301
It goes in there, and then
into the trunk of your car.
206
00:16:51,802 --> 00:16:53,888
Now, this just came over from research.
207
00:16:53,930 --> 00:16:55,723
[HIGH-PITCHED HUMMING]
208
00:17:03,481 --> 00:17:06,317
Oh, it blows up, huh?
209
00:17:12,615 --> 00:17:15,535
It's so new, we don't
even have a name for it yet.
210
00:17:15,576 --> 00:17:17,370
[HIGH-PITCHED HUMMING]
211
00:17:20,623 --> 00:17:23,459
Why don't we call it, uh,
"a little bit of hanky-panky"?
212
00:17:41,519 --> 00:17:44,105
[WOMAN CHATTERING OVER P.A. SYSTEM]
213
00:18:27,565 --> 00:18:29,984
Mr. Helm has arrived.
214
00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:31,152
Very good.
215
00:18:37,867 --> 00:18:39,243
[SNAPS FINGERS]
216
00:18:45,416 --> 00:18:48,294
The information from zone 3 was accurate.
217
00:18:48,336 --> 00:18:50,004
Mr. Helm is at the airport.
218
00:18:51,714 --> 00:18:54,508
Very well. Keep him under surveillance.
219
00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:56,385
But do not kill him yet.
220
00:18:58,346 --> 00:19:01,307
May I ask why Your
Excellency's being so generous?
221
00:19:02,808 --> 00:19:05,770
Not generous, my dear. Cautious.
222
00:19:11,233 --> 00:19:14,737
Your car is ready and your
baggage has been delivered to it.
223
00:19:14,779 --> 00:19:16,364
Hmm, how about the extra equipment?
224
00:19:16,405 --> 00:19:18,824
In the trunk, as per your instructions.
225
00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:27,875
Thank you.
226
00:19:27,917 --> 00:19:29,794
And thank you, Mr. Helm.
227
00:19:36,217 --> 00:19:37,385
He's leaving now.
228
00:19:37,426 --> 00:19:38,803
(YU-RANG) Follow him.
229
00:19:40,346 --> 00:19:41,430
[HISSING]
230
00:19:54,443 --> 00:19:56,445
Your Excellency, your call.
231
00:20:04,245 --> 00:20:07,957
Operation Rainbow has entered phase 4.
232
00:20:07,998 --> 00:20:09,500
On schedule.
233
00:20:09,542 --> 00:20:12,586
Stand by for my instructions
on Monday morning.
234
00:20:16,632 --> 00:20:18,467
Congratulations are in order.
235
00:20:20,428 --> 00:20:23,764
Congratulations are
premature, my dear Massimo.
236
00:20:23,806 --> 00:20:27,017
The report from zone
3 has been confirmed.
237
00:20:27,059 --> 00:20:31,147
And Mr. Helm is on the scene. Thank you.
238
00:20:31,188 --> 00:20:32,773
So what do you intend to do?
239
00:20:32,815 --> 00:20:34,316
I haven't decided.
240
00:20:34,358 --> 00:20:36,235
At the moment, he's under surveillance.
241
00:20:36,277 --> 00:20:37,361
Massimo,
242
00:20:38,654 --> 00:20:41,240
don't waste time. Kill him.
243
00:20:43,492 --> 00:20:47,037
I never waste anything
or anyone, dear Linka.
244
00:20:48,372 --> 00:20:52,918
But, this breakdown in American security
245
00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:54,920
is far too convenient for my liking.
246
00:20:56,839 --> 00:21:00,384
Our schedule has very
little tolerance for errors.
247
00:21:00,426 --> 00:21:05,222
Errors are made by those
who blindly accept the obvious.
248
00:21:05,264 --> 00:21:08,184
And I can't believe that
they would risk an agent
249
00:21:08,225 --> 00:21:11,562
of Mr. Helm's caliber quite so casually.
250
00:21:11,645 --> 00:21:15,441
But I will find out.
And then I will kill him.
251
00:21:45,638 --> 00:21:47,223
[CAR HONKING]
252
00:22:18,671 --> 00:22:19,630
[GRUNTING]
253
00:22:36,522 --> 00:22:38,274
Can I be of assistance?
254
00:22:38,315 --> 00:22:41,777
Oh, he always gets that
way after a couple of martinis.
255
00:22:47,324 --> 00:22:48,409
[CAR DOOR CLOSING]
256
00:23:25,279 --> 00:23:28,073
It's a pleasure to welcome
you to Copenhagen.
257
00:23:40,502 --> 00:23:42,713
Oh, I'm so sorry.
258
00:23:42,755 --> 00:23:45,132
Oh. I... I twisted my ankle.
259
00:23:45,174 --> 00:23:47,217
Well, I-I'd better have a look at it.
260
00:23:47,259 --> 00:23:49,803
No, no, it's all right, really.
261
00:23:49,845 --> 00:23:51,055
Thank you so much.
262
00:23:51,096 --> 00:23:53,057
Oh, it was my pleasure.
263
00:23:53,098 --> 00:23:55,559
Boulevard greig. Number 14. Tonight.
264
00:24:08,238 --> 00:24:10,240
(MATT) A very pleasant hotel here.
265
00:24:10,282 --> 00:24:11,325
[CHUCKLES]
266
00:24:11,367 --> 00:24:12,326
Mr. Helm?
267
00:24:12,368 --> 00:24:13,369
Yes.
268
00:24:13,410 --> 00:24:14,787
[GLASS SHATTERING] OH!
269
00:24:14,828 --> 00:24:16,330
Oh, oh.
270
00:24:16,372 --> 00:24:18,040
[MATT CHUCKLING]
271
00:24:18,082 --> 00:24:21,752
I'm Freya. Welcome to Denmark, Mr. Helm.
272
00:24:21,794 --> 00:24:24,046
You always greet people like this?
273
00:24:24,088 --> 00:24:26,924
I'm Freya Carlson, your
tourist bureau contact.
274
00:24:26,966 --> 00:24:29,218
These are for you. Street
maps, places of interest.
275
00:24:29,259 --> 00:24:30,219
Hmm.
276
00:24:30,260 --> 00:24:32,054
This is for you, too.
277
00:24:32,096 --> 00:24:34,098
Hmm. Oh, what year was that?
278
00:24:34,139 --> 00:24:35,182
1949.
279
00:24:35,224 --> 00:24:37,017
Oh, it's a very good year.
280
00:24:37,059 --> 00:24:38,644
I'm here to help you in any way I can.
281
00:24:38,686 --> 00:24:40,145
Well, it's very nice of you.
282
00:24:40,187 --> 00:24:41,772
Is there anything you'd like me to do?
283
00:24:41,814 --> 00:24:43,065
Uh, yes, ma'am. A couple of things.
284
00:24:43,107 --> 00:24:44,608
Yes, sir.
285
00:24:44,650 --> 00:24:47,069
Would you mind getting
off my camera case, please?
286
00:24:47,111 --> 00:24:48,612
[GASPING] Oh, I'm sorry.
287
00:24:48,654 --> 00:24:49,863
Oh, that's fine.
288
00:24:49,905 --> 00:24:51,407
I'm sorry. That's ok.
289
00:24:51,448 --> 00:24:53,158
Umm.
290
00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:55,869
Uh, what about the arrangements
at, uh, Contini's chateau?
291
00:24:55,911 --> 00:24:59,206
Oh, that's in the works. I'm expecting
a call from the chateau at 11:00.
292
00:24:59,248 --> 00:25:00,332
Mmm.
293
00:25:00,374 --> 00:25:01,667
I'm sorry about...
294
00:25:02,835 --> 00:25:04,336
Welcome to Denmark.
295
00:25:12,970 --> 00:25:15,055
It's some kind of hotel you got here.
296
00:25:16,181 --> 00:25:17,516
[SIGHING]
297
00:25:17,558 --> 00:25:20,269
Mmm, half a bottle is better than none.
298
00:26:01,310 --> 00:26:03,145
[DOORBELL BUZZING]
299
00:26:04,605 --> 00:26:06,607
(LOLA) It's open. Come in.
300
00:26:28,170 --> 00:26:29,213
Yep.
301
00:26:29,254 --> 00:26:30,547
[SIGHING]
302
00:26:43,227 --> 00:26:46,021
♪ [MY MELANCHOLY BABY
BY FRANK SINATRA PLAYING]
303
00:26:46,063 --> 00:26:48,232
♪ Come to me ♪
304
00:26:48,273 --> 00:26:51,485
♪ my melancholy baby ♪
305
00:26:56,907 --> 00:27:01,245
♪ cuddle up and don't be shy ♪
306
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:09,086
♪ I adore you pet ♪
307
00:27:10,838 --> 00:27:14,341
♪ but the towel's a little wet ♪
308
00:27:16,343 --> 00:27:20,889
♪ may I suggest we hang it ♪
309
00:27:20,931 --> 00:27:23,142
♪ out to dry ♪
310
00:27:25,060 --> 00:27:26,603
You're early, Mr. Helm.
311
00:27:28,897 --> 00:27:30,732
I wasn't sure you'd come.
312
00:27:32,442 --> 00:27:34,903
I was, Miss Lola Medina.
313
00:27:35,988 --> 00:27:38,615
Oh, I underestimated you.
314
00:27:40,242 --> 00:27:41,785
You know who I am.
315
00:27:43,328 --> 00:27:44,663
Mr. Helm,
316
00:27:46,331 --> 00:27:47,833
I need your advice.
317
00:27:49,126 --> 00:27:50,210
Advice?
318
00:27:52,504 --> 00:27:55,090
Would you please change
the color of the lights?
319
00:27:56,758 --> 00:27:59,178
Turn down the color of the lights?
320
00:27:59,219 --> 00:28:00,053
Oh.
321
00:28:01,221 --> 00:28:02,681
Turn the red one.
322
00:28:02,723 --> 00:28:04,516
The red one?
323
00:28:04,558 --> 00:28:08,395
Mr. Helm, as a professional photographer,
324
00:28:08,437 --> 00:28:10,397
which color would be, uh,
325
00:28:10,439 --> 00:28:13,317
most appealing in this particular light?
326
00:28:18,238 --> 00:28:21,200
That clashes with your eyes.
327
00:28:21,241 --> 00:28:23,535
And I know your setup with Contini.
328
00:28:25,579 --> 00:28:28,415
Would you turn on the blue light, please?
329
00:28:28,457 --> 00:28:31,376
Blue light. Must be the 2nd one, huh?
330
00:28:34,296 --> 00:28:36,173
Is this more interesting?
331
00:28:36,215 --> 00:28:38,717
I also know you're off the team.
332
00:28:38,759 --> 00:28:42,471
But I was on the team when
Operation Rainbow was being planned.
333
00:28:47,768 --> 00:28:50,270
Would you put on the green light?
334
00:28:54,191 --> 00:28:56,401
Operation Rainbow?
335
00:28:56,443 --> 00:29:00,447
Operation Rainbow, our
code name for $1 billion...
336
00:29:00,489 --> 00:29:03,367
What's your American word? Heist.
337
00:29:03,408 --> 00:29:04,993
Heist? Huh, heist.
338
00:29:06,119 --> 00:29:07,371
[CLATTERING]
339
00:29:10,374 --> 00:29:11,625
Would you change the light?
340
00:29:11,667 --> 00:29:12,668
Yes.
341
00:29:14,253 --> 00:29:15,212
Well?
342
00:29:20,550 --> 00:29:22,844
Yep. Mmm-hmm.
343
00:29:24,596 --> 00:29:28,809
I... I know what you're after
344
00:29:28,850 --> 00:29:31,895
and, uh, I like the way
you're goin' about it.
345
00:29:33,272 --> 00:29:34,356
Thank you, Mr. Helm.
346
00:29:34,398 --> 00:29:36,316
Oh, it's all right.
347
00:29:40,028 --> 00:29:41,280
Oh, thank you.
348
00:29:42,489 --> 00:29:44,408
I mean,
349
00:29:44,449 --> 00:29:46,910
No, thanks. I mean, I don't use them.
350
00:29:46,952 --> 00:29:48,036
Oh.
351
00:30:05,095 --> 00:30:07,222
[MOANS]
352
00:30:07,264 --> 00:30:10,767
Nobody's gonna believe
this down at the office, but, uh,
353
00:30:12,269 --> 00:30:15,105
I'm on a very tight schedule.
354
00:30:15,147 --> 00:30:17,649
But I know where the gold is, Mr. Helm.
355
00:30:20,527 --> 00:30:24,072
Well, I-I'm not on that...
that tight a schedule.
356
00:30:24,114 --> 00:30:25,574
[CHUCKLING]
357
00:30:25,615 --> 00:30:27,492
I love flexible men.
358
00:30:29,411 --> 00:30:32,998
There's... there's just,
uh, 2 little words, uh,
359
00:30:33,040 --> 00:30:34,166
where it is, uh,
360
00:30:35,542 --> 00:30:36,626
how much?
361
00:30:39,796 --> 00:30:41,840
Oh, I'm a gypsy, Mr. Helm.
362
00:30:41,882 --> 00:30:43,800
My father was a gypsy.
363
00:30:44,926 --> 00:30:47,220
And he taught us one thing:
364
00:30:48,764 --> 00:30:52,392
wise men enjoy pleasure
365
00:30:53,977 --> 00:30:55,395
before business.
366
00:30:57,439 --> 00:31:00,067
Well, I like your father's thinking.
367
00:31:01,860 --> 00:31:04,112
[INHALES]
368
00:31:04,154 --> 00:31:05,113
Oh.
369
00:31:10,077 --> 00:31:13,455
Oh, I'm a wretched hostess, Mr. Helm.
370
00:31:13,497 --> 00:31:15,248
I haven't offered you a thing.
371
00:31:17,542 --> 00:31:19,211
I wouldn't say that.
372
00:31:33,350 --> 00:31:35,102
What do you prefer?
373
00:31:36,269 --> 00:31:37,145
To drink.
374
00:31:41,024 --> 00:31:42,692
I've heard that you do
375
00:31:44,569 --> 00:31:45,570
drink.
376
00:31:46,738 --> 00:31:49,032
Well, it's...
377
00:31:49,074 --> 00:31:51,868
Just call it a hobby.
Scotch on the rocks.
378
00:31:53,870 --> 00:31:57,249
Oh, I'm so sorry, I'm out of scotch.
379
00:32:00,252 --> 00:32:02,254
Can I give you something else?
380
00:32:05,757 --> 00:32:07,217
Surprise me.
381
00:32:10,887 --> 00:32:12,514
Oh, Mr. Helm,
382
00:32:12,556 --> 00:32:15,225
for my cooperation, I want 2 things:
383
00:32:17,352 --> 00:32:19,271
Massimo Contini destroyed
384
00:32:20,814 --> 00:32:22,524
and $1 million.
385
00:32:28,280 --> 00:32:31,032
$1 million, huh?
386
00:32:37,789 --> 00:32:40,959
Oh, you're in luck, Mr. Helm.
387
00:32:43,170 --> 00:32:44,880
[EXPLOSION RUMBLING]
388
00:32:49,426 --> 00:32:50,677
[THUDDING]
389
00:33:01,938 --> 00:33:04,149
[POLICE CAR APPROACHING]
390
00:33:35,889 --> 00:33:37,390
[POLICE SIREN WAILING]
391
00:33:38,517 --> 00:33:40,060
[TIRES SQUEALING]
392
00:33:43,438 --> 00:33:44,988
(POLICEMAN) Get out of the car.
393
00:33:45,899 --> 00:33:47,234
Your hands in the air, please.
394
00:33:47,275 --> 00:33:48,777
(FREYA) Wait just a minute!
395
00:33:48,818 --> 00:33:50,320
Your identification.
396
00:33:50,362 --> 00:33:52,906
Wait just a minute. Just a minute.
397
00:33:52,948 --> 00:33:55,909
I'm Freya Carlson from
the Danish tourist bureau.
398
00:33:55,951 --> 00:33:57,744
Oh, for heaven's sake,
put that silly gun away.
399
00:33:57,786 --> 00:33:59,371
This happens to be Matt Helm,
400
00:33:59,412 --> 00:34:01,748
one of america's most
distinguished photographers.
401
00:34:01,790 --> 00:34:03,291
Well, that may be true, but...
402
00:34:03,333 --> 00:34:04,417
No news from the chateau yet.
403
00:34:04,501 --> 00:34:07,254
Uh, have you had your dinner?
404
00:34:07,295 --> 00:34:10,382
Look, Miss Carlson, we've
just received reports of, uh,
405
00:34:10,423 --> 00:34:12,384
an explosion and a
homicide in this building
406
00:34:12,425 --> 00:34:14,302
that your Mr. Helm
was leaving so hastily.
407
00:34:14,344 --> 00:34:17,222
Well, I would say leaving
the area of an explosion hastily
408
00:34:17,264 --> 00:34:19,558
is an extremely sensible reaction.
409
00:34:19,641 --> 00:34:21,560
Uh, it must... it must
have been horrifying...
410
00:34:21,601 --> 00:34:23,436
Will you shut up?
411
00:34:23,478 --> 00:34:24,604
Come along, sir.
412
00:34:24,646 --> 00:34:26,481
I'm only trying to help.
413
00:34:26,523 --> 00:34:29,234
Don't do me a... You'll
help me right into death row.
414
00:34:29,276 --> 00:34:31,361
Why don't you split. Go
call the American embassy.
415
00:34:31,403 --> 00:34:33,363
I'm not running out on you.
416
00:34:33,405 --> 00:34:36,157
Please, do me a... Run
out, huh? Desert! Desert!
417
00:34:36,241 --> 00:34:37,826
(MATT) Desert, please desert.
418
00:34:41,288 --> 00:34:43,623
Why, Mr. Helm, what a pleasant surprise!
419
00:34:43,665 --> 00:34:44,624
I hope so.
420
00:34:44,666 --> 00:34:46,334
What is all this?
421
00:34:46,376 --> 00:34:48,420
Excellency, we're checking
an explosion and a homicide...
422
00:34:48,461 --> 00:34:50,380
Then I suggest that you get on with it.
423
00:34:50,422 --> 00:34:52,382
I'll vouch for Mr. Helm.
424
00:34:52,424 --> 00:34:53,883
Yes, Excellency.
425
00:34:55,343 --> 00:34:57,846
Mr. Helm, I am count Massimo Contini.
426
00:34:57,887 --> 00:34:59,681
I know you by your reputation, of course.
427
00:34:59,723 --> 00:35:01,308
Count Contini,
428
00:35:01,349 --> 00:35:03,435
I've been trying to get in
touch with you for days.
429
00:35:03,476 --> 00:35:05,395
We wanted permission to
photograph your chateau.
430
00:35:05,437 --> 00:35:06,730
That would be my pleasure.
431
00:35:06,771 --> 00:35:08,481
Shall we say 10:00 tomorrow morning?
432
00:35:08,523 --> 00:35:10,150
Yes, fine. 10:00.
433
00:35:17,198 --> 00:35:19,159
Who we? We? We? What's "we"?
434
00:35:19,200 --> 00:35:21,036
Us. You and me. Hmm.
435
00:35:21,077 --> 00:35:22,537
My orders from the tourist bureau
436
00:35:22,579 --> 00:35:24,080
are to work directly under you.
437
00:35:24,122 --> 00:35:26,333
Hmm. Directly under?
438
00:35:26,374 --> 00:35:28,376
The first order is to get outta here.
439
00:35:28,418 --> 00:35:29,836
Yes, sir.
440
00:35:29,878 --> 00:35:30,962
Hmm.
441
00:35:32,672 --> 00:35:34,132
Yes, ma'am.
442
00:35:45,268 --> 00:35:47,312
[CAR ENGINE STARTING]
443
00:35:47,354 --> 00:35:48,563
[CLANKING]
444
00:36:05,580 --> 00:36:06,956
[HONKING]
445
00:36:17,717 --> 00:36:20,261
Mr. Helm. I think we're stuck.
446
00:36:21,805 --> 00:36:23,807
We're what? We're stuck.
447
00:36:23,848 --> 00:36:25,433
We're stuck? Yeah.
448
00:36:28,103 --> 00:36:29,396
Good.
449
00:36:29,437 --> 00:36:31,356
Is that all you've got to say?
450
00:36:44,744 --> 00:36:48,415
Oh, dear! I just ruined a
perfectly good pair of stockings.
451
00:36:48,456 --> 00:36:50,875
Poor Lola made the headlines.
452
00:36:50,917 --> 00:36:52,877
It was a rather noisy exit.
453
00:36:54,087 --> 00:36:55,964
Arranged by you?
454
00:36:57,173 --> 00:36:58,842
But of course.
455
00:36:58,883 --> 00:37:02,345
She met with Mr. Helm for
only one reason: to betray you.
456
00:37:02,387 --> 00:37:03,930
So I simply stopped by her place
457
00:37:03,972 --> 00:37:05,682
and dropped off a gift bottle of scotch.
458
00:37:05,724 --> 00:37:08,268
With that inevitable kick in it.
459
00:37:08,309 --> 00:37:12,647
But you disobeyed my orders,
you risked the life of Mr. Helm.
460
00:37:12,689 --> 00:37:16,776
Oh, darling, we
discussed all that last night.
461
00:37:16,818 --> 00:37:20,572
It seemed to me that you forgave me. No?
462
00:37:20,613 --> 00:37:23,491
Last night I was in a forgiving mood.
463
00:37:23,533 --> 00:37:27,537
This morning I'm thinking
realistically of $1 billion in gold
464
00:37:27,579 --> 00:37:29,330
[CAR HONKS ON C.C.T.V.]
465
00:37:31,332 --> 00:37:33,668
And Mr. Helm...
466
00:38:02,280 --> 00:38:04,491
Whose character we will now test.
467
00:38:19,339 --> 00:38:22,801
Mr. Helm, His Excellency
will see you now.
468
00:38:22,842 --> 00:38:24,385
This way, please.
469
00:38:48,993 --> 00:38:51,579
Miss Carlson. Mr. Helm.
470
00:38:52,789 --> 00:38:54,290
You are prompt.
471
00:38:54,374 --> 00:38:56,501
We couldn't wait to get
started, Your Excellency.
472
00:38:56,543 --> 00:38:57,919
We?
473
00:38:57,961 --> 00:38:59,879
I'll take notes while
he takes the pictures.
474
00:38:59,921 --> 00:39:00,922
Mmm-hmm.
475
00:39:06,845 --> 00:39:08,721
I'll take her anytime.
476
00:39:13,268 --> 00:39:15,395
(CONTINI) Miss Carlson, Mr. Helm,
477
00:39:15,436 --> 00:39:17,689
My fiancee, Miss Linka Karensky.
478
00:39:19,440 --> 00:39:21,359
Miss Karensky, they told me...
479
00:39:21,401 --> 00:39:24,112
Linka. Please call me Linka, Mr. Helm.
480
00:39:25,738 --> 00:39:28,241
Well, make mine Matt, ok?
481
00:39:28,283 --> 00:39:30,326
They told me the count had great taste.
482
00:39:30,410 --> 00:39:31,619
Who told you that?
483
00:39:31,661 --> 00:39:32,620
I did.
484
00:39:32,662 --> 00:39:34,205
[CLEARS THROAT]
485
00:39:34,247 --> 00:39:37,667
Uh, Mr. Helm, we came
here to work, remember?
486
00:39:37,709 --> 00:39:40,336
Yes. Perhaps you'd like
to start in the conservatory.
487
00:39:41,504 --> 00:39:43,047
Come along, my dear.
488
00:39:43,089 --> 00:39:45,258
The view is simply breathtaking.
489
00:39:47,385 --> 00:39:48,845
It sure is.
490
00:39:52,307 --> 00:39:54,475
Was it something I said?
491
00:39:54,517 --> 00:39:57,854
In our civilized business,
this is the traditional time
492
00:39:57,896 --> 00:40:02,233
to offer you a cigarette or
some liquid refreshment perhaps.
493
00:40:02,275 --> 00:40:06,821
But since we are professional
people, on limiting time schedules,
494
00:40:06,863 --> 00:40:09,908
I suggest that we dispense
with such amenities.
495
00:40:09,949 --> 00:40:12,744
Oh, no, let's not dispense
with any of those things.
496
00:40:12,785 --> 00:40:14,203
[CHUCKLING]
497
00:40:14,245 --> 00:40:16,789
But, of course, you're right. Karl...
498
00:40:25,715 --> 00:40:28,259
There's so little time for grace
499
00:40:28,301 --> 00:40:32,138
and civility in this
vulgar world of ours.
500
00:40:32,180 --> 00:40:36,017
Well, I said it once and I'll
say it again, I like your style.
501
00:40:39,437 --> 00:40:42,941
Actually, I would have preferred
to live in a different century.
502
00:40:42,982 --> 00:40:44,984
Florence in the 13th,
or Germany in the 18th.
503
00:40:45,026 --> 00:40:46,486
Wouldn't you, Mr. Helm?
504
00:40:46,527 --> 00:40:48,905
It'd be all wrong, I'd
be dead by now. Hmm?
505
00:40:48,947 --> 00:40:50,365
[LAUGHING]
506
00:40:50,406 --> 00:40:53,993
Which brings me precisely to the point.
507
00:40:54,035 --> 00:40:56,371
You see, I know who you are, Mr. Helm.
508
00:40:56,412 --> 00:40:58,456
An agent of I.C.E.
509
00:40:58,498 --> 00:41:00,416
And I know why you came to Denmark.
510
00:41:00,458 --> 00:41:03,294
To recover $1 billion in American gold.
511
00:41:05,296 --> 00:41:07,340
Somebody's puttin' you on, count.
512
00:41:07,382 --> 00:41:09,050
Please, Mr. Helm,
513
00:41:09,092 --> 00:41:11,970
stupidity has a tendency
to make me impatient.
514
00:41:12,011 --> 00:41:13,930
However,
515
00:41:13,972 --> 00:41:16,391
luckily, I dislike unnecessary violence,
516
00:41:16,432 --> 00:41:18,977
which may lead to unnecessary publicity.
517
00:41:19,018 --> 00:41:21,312
Therefore, you are going to south america
518
00:41:21,354 --> 00:41:23,481
on the next available flight.
519
00:41:23,523 --> 00:41:25,483
With $1 million in cash.
520
00:41:28,277 --> 00:41:30,780
Oh, I'd hate myself in the morning.
521
00:41:30,822 --> 00:41:32,240
(CONTINI) $2 million?
522
00:41:32,281 --> 00:41:34,325
I'd hate myself twice in the morning.
523
00:41:34,367 --> 00:41:36,369
I'd lose my sense of values.
524
00:41:36,411 --> 00:41:37,829
You are interfering with plans
525
00:41:37,870 --> 00:41:40,915
as delicately balanced
as a swiss chronometer.
526
00:41:44,794 --> 00:41:46,838
Therefore I must kill you.
527
00:41:51,009 --> 00:41:53,386
Uh, you remember what
you said about being stupid?
528
00:41:53,428 --> 00:41:57,181
You think I walked in here
without knowing I could walk out?
529
00:41:57,223 --> 00:42:00,226
Now, the Danish tourist
bureau, they know where I am.
530
00:42:00,268 --> 00:42:02,937
And they know the
minute I'm expected back.
531
00:42:02,979 --> 00:42:07,358
If I don't show up, you're
gonna be up to your hips in cops.
532
00:42:07,400 --> 00:42:10,278
(MATT) Freya, uh,
533
00:42:10,319 --> 00:42:13,614
uh, tell him the tourist bureau,
they know where I am, right?
534
00:42:13,656 --> 00:42:14,866
Oh, no, Mr. Helm.
535
00:42:14,907 --> 00:42:16,242
No, Mr. Helm?
536
00:42:16,284 --> 00:42:18,244
No, our clients have complete privacy.
537
00:42:18,286 --> 00:42:20,246
No one knows who you are.
538
00:42:22,540 --> 00:42:24,292
[EXCLAIMS]
539
00:42:24,333 --> 00:42:25,585
[FREYA EXCLAIMING]
540
00:42:25,626 --> 00:42:26,586
Oh.
541
00:42:26,627 --> 00:42:28,254
(MATT) Hold it! Smile!
542
00:42:28,296 --> 00:42:29,380
(FREYA) Ah! Oh!
543
00:42:29,464 --> 00:42:30,798
[HISSING]
544
00:42:30,840 --> 00:42:32,592
Oh, they didn't smile.
545
00:42:33,801 --> 00:42:34,761
[GRUNTING]
546
00:42:36,137 --> 00:42:37,096
[GRUNTING]
547
00:42:38,222 --> 00:42:39,474
[YELLING]
548
00:42:39,515 --> 00:42:40,475
[GROANING]
549
00:42:43,102 --> 00:42:43,935
[GRUNTING]
550
00:42:47,356 --> 00:42:49,108
[YELLING]
551
00:42:54,405 --> 00:42:55,573
[COUGHING]
552
00:42:58,159 --> 00:42:59,285
[MEN COUGHING]
553
00:43:00,411 --> 00:43:02,330
[ALARM RINGING]
554
00:43:11,255 --> 00:43:12,757
[COUGHING]
555
00:43:17,428 --> 00:43:19,180
Oh!
556
00:43:19,222 --> 00:43:20,765
You'll be all right. Yes.
557
00:43:20,807 --> 00:43:22,107
All right, get over there.
558
00:43:23,059 --> 00:43:24,185
Come on!
559
00:43:27,396 --> 00:43:28,314
[SCREAMING]
560
00:43:29,440 --> 00:43:30,441
Okay.
561
00:43:30,483 --> 00:43:31,692
[LINKA GASPING]
562
00:43:31,734 --> 00:43:33,319
What... what makes
you think she can swim?
563
00:43:33,361 --> 00:43:35,404
That was the only way to find out. Right?
564
00:43:35,446 --> 00:43:36,823
Yeah, right, right.
565
00:43:38,825 --> 00:43:40,326
Bah!
566
00:43:40,409 --> 00:43:42,495
[ALARM CONTINUES RINGING]
567
00:44:40,803 --> 00:44:41,804
Get him!
568
00:44:41,888 --> 00:44:43,181
[TIRES SQUEALING]
569
00:44:43,222 --> 00:44:45,057
[THUDDING]
570
00:44:45,099 --> 00:44:48,394
Why are they bumping us, Mr. Helm?
571
00:45:07,413 --> 00:45:09,123
They're coming, Mr. Helm!
572
00:45:11,876 --> 00:45:13,336
[THUDDING]
573
00:45:15,379 --> 00:45:17,506
Don't push me down. I can't see.
574
00:45:26,349 --> 00:45:28,351
[TIRES SQUEALING]
575
00:45:28,392 --> 00:45:31,604
They're trying to kill us,
Mr. Helm. They're trying to kill us.
576
00:45:36,859 --> 00:45:38,152
(FREYA) Drive faster.
577
00:45:56,671 --> 00:45:58,172
[TIRES SKIDDING]
578
00:46:13,729 --> 00:46:15,147
[SPEAKING CHINESE]
579
00:46:17,942 --> 00:46:20,611
Faster! You're an awful driver.
580
00:46:30,371 --> 00:46:32,790
Hang onto your miniskirt.
581
00:46:32,832 --> 00:46:34,292
[TIRES SQUEALING]
582
00:46:43,175 --> 00:46:44,385
[LAUGHS]
583
00:46:44,427 --> 00:46:46,762
At the tram, the road dead-ends.
584
00:47:14,999 --> 00:47:16,167
[BRAKES SCREECHING]
585
00:47:39,648 --> 00:47:40,608
Ooh.
586
00:48:25,528 --> 00:48:27,863
Bring it down. Now!
587
00:48:30,533 --> 00:48:31,992
[SQUEAKING]
588
00:48:52,930 --> 00:48:54,765
(FREYA) It's occupied.
589
00:49:08,863 --> 00:49:10,322
[KNOCKING]
590
00:49:10,364 --> 00:49:12,366
(FREYA) Please, just a minute.
591
00:49:27,548 --> 00:49:30,134
For heaven's sake. Oh, no!
592
00:49:30,176 --> 00:49:31,177
[MAN GRUNTING]
593
00:49:33,846 --> 00:49:35,306
Get to the car.
594
00:49:35,347 --> 00:49:36,682
[MEN YELLING]
595
00:49:38,976 --> 00:49:40,144
[EXCLAIMING]
596
00:49:47,318 --> 00:49:48,277
[YELLING]
597
00:49:53,782 --> 00:49:54,992
[GRUNTING]
598
00:49:58,162 --> 00:49:59,997
Hyah!
599
00:50:05,336 --> 00:50:06,670
[GROANING]
600
00:50:06,712 --> 00:50:08,172
[EXCLAIMING]
601
00:50:11,383 --> 00:50:12,801
[YELLING]
602
00:50:12,843 --> 00:50:14,220
[MEN THUDDING]
603
00:50:14,261 --> 00:50:15,930
[MEN YELLING]
604
00:50:18,766 --> 00:50:19,725
Yah!
605
00:50:23,812 --> 00:50:24,688
Ah!
606
00:50:25,814 --> 00:50:26,857
[GRUNTING]
607
00:50:26,899 --> 00:50:28,317
[YELLING]
608
00:50:31,237 --> 00:50:32,279
[GROANING]
609
00:50:48,337 --> 00:50:50,548
You did? You'd better.
610
00:50:50,589 --> 00:50:54,843
Each phase of the operation
has been advanced 8 hours.
611
00:50:54,885 --> 00:50:57,185
You will have the
pleasure of killing Mr. Helm.
612
00:50:59,098 --> 00:51:01,600
Thank you very much, Your Excellency.
613
00:51:11,318 --> 00:51:12,570
[HONKING]
614
00:51:18,659 --> 00:51:19,952
[BRAKES SQUEAKING]
615
00:51:19,994 --> 00:51:21,161
All right.
616
00:51:23,247 --> 00:51:26,750
Get out and remember,
we'll call you. Out!
617
00:52:23,182 --> 00:52:25,434
♪ [EXACTLY LIKE YOU BY
DOROTHY FIELDS, JIMMY MACHUGH]
618
00:52:25,476 --> 00:52:28,979
♪ I know why I've waited ♪
619
00:52:29,021 --> 00:52:32,024
♪ know why I've been blue ♪
620
00:52:33,817 --> 00:52:36,236
♪ prayed each night for a room mate ♪
621
00:52:37,571 --> 00:52:40,115
♪ exactly like you ♪
622
00:52:44,203 --> 00:52:45,871
Mr. Helm? Mmm-hmm.
623
00:52:45,913 --> 00:52:46,955
Yu-rang.
624
00:52:48,082 --> 00:52:49,124
No, I didn't.
625
00:52:50,793 --> 00:52:53,921
But since you're here,
why don't you sit down?
626
00:52:53,962 --> 00:52:55,714
No, my name is Yu-rang.
627
00:52:57,091 --> 00:52:59,551
Your name is Yu-rang? That's good.
628
00:53:09,019 --> 00:53:12,106
Lie down. I want to talk to you.
629
00:53:18,404 --> 00:53:22,241
About a certain $1 billion in gold?
630
00:53:22,282 --> 00:53:24,868
Half a billion, Mr. Helm.
631
00:53:26,704 --> 00:53:29,039
I'm thinking of a partnership.
632
00:53:31,291 --> 00:53:32,292
So am I.
633
00:53:34,503 --> 00:53:38,215
Shall we, um, come to the point?
634
00:53:43,595 --> 00:53:46,056
Well, maybe you're in too big a hurry.
635
00:53:46,098 --> 00:53:48,392
Now that we're partners, uh,
636
00:53:48,434 --> 00:53:51,854
why don't you just relax, Miss Yu-rang?
637
00:53:51,895 --> 00:53:54,273
Let's not be formal, Matt.
638
00:53:54,314 --> 00:53:56,400
My first name is Wen.
639
00:53:57,735 --> 00:53:59,611
Wen? Wen Yu-rang.
640
00:53:59,653 --> 00:54:01,321
[CHUCKLING] MMM-HMM.
641
00:54:01,363 --> 00:54:04,616
I say the answer's hello.
642
00:54:04,658 --> 00:54:06,785
Mmm-hmm, hello.
643
00:54:06,827 --> 00:54:11,331
Now where did you say
my half a billion in gold was?
644
00:54:11,373 --> 00:54:14,126
In the same place my half a billion is.
645
00:54:14,209 --> 00:54:15,544
[FREYA CLEARING THROAT]
646
00:54:15,586 --> 00:54:17,337
(FREYA) Pardon me, Mr. Helm.
647
00:54:18,547 --> 00:54:19,798
She's here.
648
00:54:23,343 --> 00:54:25,637
No. Yes, she's here.
649
00:54:26,930 --> 00:54:28,640
She's got a knife in her hand.
650
00:54:28,724 --> 00:54:30,809
I know she's got a knife in her hands.
651
00:54:30,851 --> 00:54:32,436
And I said I'd call you.
652
00:54:33,562 --> 00:54:35,439
But it's very important.
653
00:54:39,985 --> 00:54:41,195
Uh, pardon me?
654
00:54:47,034 --> 00:54:49,536
Oh, we're having a party, no?
655
00:54:49,578 --> 00:54:51,622
Here.
656
00:54:51,663 --> 00:54:55,000
They, um, they told me you were a unique
657
00:54:55,042 --> 00:54:58,128
experience, Mr. Helm. Matt.
658
00:54:59,505 --> 00:55:03,217
Incredibly formidable, exciting.
659
00:55:04,384 --> 00:55:06,345
Now I shall never find out.
660
00:55:06,386 --> 00:55:09,515
Mr. Helm, Mr. Macdonald has been calling
661
00:55:09,556 --> 00:55:11,308
and he's on his way here.
662
00:55:20,776 --> 00:55:23,445
Oh, isn't that an
adorable mink, Mr. Helm?
663
00:55:26,824 --> 00:55:29,034
Uh, I don't know what you've got,
664
00:55:29,076 --> 00:55:31,620
but you sure got bad timing.
665
00:55:31,662 --> 00:55:33,163
[PHONE RINGING]
666
00:55:39,461 --> 00:55:42,005
Yes? Oh, Linka?
667
00:55:43,298 --> 00:55:45,634
A lodge? I'd love to.
668
00:55:50,597 --> 00:55:53,892
Mr. Helm, aren't you gonna
wait for Mr. Macdonald?
669
00:55:53,934 --> 00:55:56,395
He cabled the bureau
that he'd be in tonight.
670
00:55:56,436 --> 00:55:57,771
Want to do me a favor?
671
00:55:57,813 --> 00:55:58,897
Yes, sir.
672
00:55:58,939 --> 00:56:00,607
Go play in the freeway.
673
00:56:02,359 --> 00:56:03,610
Without a car.
674
00:56:14,329 --> 00:56:16,456
[PHONE RINGING]
675
00:56:16,498 --> 00:56:17,833
(FREYA) J.B., please.
676
00:56:17,875 --> 00:56:18,959
J.B.
677
00:56:20,210 --> 00:56:21,795
Yes.
678
00:56:21,837 --> 00:56:24,756
Establish an observation
post at Contini's chateau.
679
00:56:24,798 --> 00:56:27,134
It'll be functional at 0800 hours.
680
00:56:27,175 --> 00:56:28,302
Right.
681
00:56:44,651 --> 00:56:47,321
Mr. Macdonald, can you
give us any assurance
682
00:56:47,362 --> 00:56:50,324
that Matt Helm will
complete his mission on time?
683
00:56:50,365 --> 00:56:53,452
I regret to say that I
can't, Mr. Ambassador.
684
00:56:53,493 --> 00:56:56,496
You see, Matt's been out of
contact for the past 26 hours.
685
00:56:56,538 --> 00:57:00,542
Gentlemen, unless we
get that gold on Monday,
686
00:57:00,584 --> 00:57:03,045
by noon the pound will be worthless.
687
00:57:03,086 --> 00:57:05,964
In that event, how long could
the American dollar survive?
688
00:57:06,006 --> 00:57:07,674
Can't we send in a task force?
689
00:57:07,716 --> 00:57:10,969
No, sir. We just can't risk a newsbreak.
690
00:57:11,011 --> 00:57:12,429
However, I've notified Matt
691
00:57:12,471 --> 00:57:14,765
that I'm on my way to Copenhagen.
692
00:57:14,806 --> 00:57:17,059
I'll report to you by 0100.
693
00:57:18,268 --> 00:57:19,311
Gentlemen.
694
00:57:39,790 --> 00:57:41,166
[CAR DOOR CLOSING]
695
00:58:14,616 --> 00:58:16,243
[CRICKETS CHIRPING]
696
00:58:51,737 --> 00:58:54,740
♪ If your sweetheart ♪
697
00:58:54,781 --> 00:58:59,077
♪ puts a pistol in her bed ♪
698
00:59:02,247 --> 00:59:05,333
♪ you'd do better ♪
699
00:59:05,375 --> 00:59:08,879
♪ sleeping with your uncle fred ♪
700
00:59:10,213 --> 00:59:12,299
I told you I'd love to come.
701
00:59:12,340 --> 00:59:14,176
[SIGHING]
702
00:59:14,217 --> 00:59:16,428
Of course, but you... you startled me.
703
00:59:16,470 --> 00:59:17,846
You weren't expecting me?
704
00:59:17,888 --> 00:59:19,639
Oh, but I'm delighted you're here.
705
00:59:19,681 --> 00:59:21,808
As a matter of fact, I
could use a little help.
706
00:59:21,850 --> 00:59:23,226
Would you, please?
707
00:59:23,268 --> 00:59:24,478
Hmm.
708
00:59:24,519 --> 00:59:25,562
Oh!
709
00:59:26,938 --> 00:59:29,399
Which way, up or down?
710
00:59:29,441 --> 00:59:32,069
There's always a choice,
Mr. Helm, isn't there?
711
00:59:32,110 --> 00:59:33,320
Mmm-hmm.
712
00:59:36,406 --> 00:59:37,532
Thank you.
713
00:59:39,910 --> 00:59:42,496
I thought you wanted to talk.
714
00:59:42,537 --> 00:59:43,997
Well, can't that wait?
715
00:59:44,039 --> 00:59:47,417
I always prefer pleasure before business.
716
00:59:47,459 --> 00:59:51,004
Hmm. I bet your father
was a wise old gypsy.
717
00:59:51,046 --> 00:59:53,006
Because I'm going barefoot?
718
00:59:53,048 --> 00:59:54,424
Ah, just a thought.
719
00:59:54,466 --> 00:59:57,010
But I like your thinkin'. Pleasure first.
720
00:59:59,596 --> 01:00:02,182
Without interruptions.
721
01:00:02,224 --> 01:00:03,767
Were you expecting someone?
722
01:00:03,809 --> 01:00:07,229
Yeah. That nice friendly
character in your car.
723
01:00:07,270 --> 01:00:10,857
But don't you worry about
him. He's taking a nice long nap.
724
01:00:12,484 --> 01:00:15,153
Oh, well, that was stupid.
Karl is no threat to you.
725
01:00:16,488 --> 01:00:17,948
And neither am I.
726
01:00:20,992 --> 01:00:24,663
So this is the place I was
gonna get shot in the back.
727
01:00:24,704 --> 01:00:29,292
Kind of a stylish pad
to, um, take off from.
728
01:00:29,334 --> 01:00:32,587
Oh, I forgot to tell you, I took the gun.
729
01:00:34,464 --> 01:00:36,049
[CHUCKLING]
730
01:00:36,091 --> 01:00:38,468
Well, of course Contini
sent me here to kill you.
731
01:00:38,510 --> 01:00:40,387
But you see, on the way over here,
732
01:00:40,428 --> 01:00:43,974
I changed my mind and I decided not to.
733
01:00:44,057 --> 01:00:46,977
Mmm-hmm. After I
decked that friendly chap
734
01:00:47,018 --> 01:00:50,230
and after I took the
hardware, then you decided?
735
01:00:50,272 --> 01:00:51,690
Mr. Helm. Mmm-hmm?
736
01:00:51,731 --> 01:00:53,316
[WHISPERING] Come here.
737
01:00:54,985 --> 01:00:57,696
You want me to lie down
so you can talk to me?
738
01:01:00,699 --> 01:01:01,783
Ok.
739
01:01:04,828 --> 01:01:06,163
[SIGHING]
740
01:01:11,501 --> 01:01:13,837
About a partnership.
741
01:01:13,879 --> 01:01:18,341
A full partnership? Name
on a rug, door, floor?
742
01:01:23,013 --> 01:01:24,681
The full treatment.
743
01:01:28,435 --> 01:01:31,146
You see, the train has
stopped for Contini and me,
744
01:01:33,231 --> 01:01:34,900
and I'm getting off.
745
01:01:39,279 --> 01:01:41,031
To wait for me?
746
01:01:41,072 --> 01:01:42,282
Mmm-hmm.
747
01:01:44,159 --> 01:01:45,243
Why?
748
01:01:46,369 --> 01:01:47,913
Because I was told
749
01:01:49,915 --> 01:01:52,125
you were well worth waiting for.
750
01:01:52,167 --> 01:01:54,461
Gossip. Just gossip.
751
01:01:54,502 --> 01:01:56,421
Don't you believe me?
752
01:01:56,463 --> 01:01:57,589
No.
753
01:01:57,631 --> 01:01:58,924
[SCOFFING]
754
01:02:00,258 --> 01:02:01,259
Mr. Helm.
755
01:02:01,301 --> 01:02:03,845
Hmm?
756
01:02:03,887 --> 01:02:06,640
Look under the pillow
at your left-hand side.
757
01:02:14,564 --> 01:02:18,652
You see, my friendly
chauffeur and, uh, the other gun
758
01:02:19,819 --> 01:02:22,447
were just decoys.
759
01:02:22,489 --> 01:02:25,909
And that is the gun I was
supposed to kill you with.
760
01:02:27,369 --> 01:02:29,412
I'm even taking off my bracelet
761
01:02:29,454 --> 01:02:32,123
because I don't want
you to get scratched.
762
01:02:34,251 --> 01:02:36,419
Now do you believe me?
763
01:02:36,461 --> 01:02:37,921
I'd better.
764
01:02:39,297 --> 01:02:41,967
You got a deal. Now, where is the gold?
765
01:02:43,468 --> 01:02:45,762
It's being moved right now.
766
01:02:45,804 --> 01:02:48,306
They won't believe this
down at the office either,
767
01:02:48,348 --> 01:02:51,101
but here's a straight question: where to?
768
01:02:52,936 --> 01:02:54,312
I really don't know.
769
01:02:55,480 --> 01:02:57,148
And I won't know for hours.
770
01:02:58,733 --> 01:03:02,696
So you see, we've all
the time in the world.
771
01:03:21,548 --> 01:03:23,300
[HORN BLARING]
772
01:03:29,639 --> 01:03:31,057
[SIGHING]
773
01:03:31,099 --> 01:03:33,143
Horn. That's a horn. That's not a horn.
774
01:03:33,184 --> 01:03:34,728
You didn't... That wasn't...
775
01:03:34,769 --> 01:03:37,314
Tell me you didn't hear a
horn. You heard a horn?
776
01:03:38,481 --> 01:03:41,234
She's here. She's here.
777
01:03:53,163 --> 01:03:56,708
You got a deal, partner.
Now, you call me.
778
01:03:58,043 --> 01:03:59,294
[SIGHING]
779
01:04:02,505 --> 01:04:03,590
[DOOR CLICKING]
780
01:04:23,318 --> 01:04:24,694
♪ [CAR HORN HONKING]
781
01:04:38,500 --> 01:04:41,336
There's activity, but nothing conclusive.
782
01:04:41,378 --> 01:04:42,921
Maintain surveillance.
783
01:04:42,962 --> 01:04:44,089
(J.B.) right.
784
01:04:53,473 --> 01:04:54,808
[GUNSHOTS]
785
01:05:37,183 --> 01:05:41,020
♪ let me call you sweetheart ♪
786
01:05:42,397 --> 01:05:46,234
♪ I'm in love with you ♪
787
01:05:49,863 --> 01:05:53,783
♪ I haven't seen your face, dear ♪
788
01:05:55,243 --> 01:05:59,080
♪ but your leg's will do ♪
789
01:07:12,654 --> 01:07:16,449
(CONTINI) Each phase of our
operation has been advanced 10 hours.
790
01:07:16,491 --> 01:07:17,742
Repeat, 10 hours.
791
01:07:17,784 --> 01:07:19,244
Shipments will be delivered
792
01:07:19,285 --> 01:07:21,496
according to my prearranged schedules.
793
01:07:21,538 --> 01:07:24,415
But our tolerances have
been drastically reduced.
794
01:07:24,457 --> 01:07:25,875
Macdonald is here.
795
01:07:25,917 --> 01:07:27,252
Which means that I.C.E.,
796
01:07:27,293 --> 01:07:30,255
has established red alert plus one.
797
01:07:30,296 --> 01:07:31,714
You tried and failed.
798
01:07:31,756 --> 01:07:33,466
I won't tonight.
799
01:07:33,508 --> 01:07:36,094
(CONTINI) Words. I can't
afford the luxury of words.
800
01:07:36,135 --> 01:07:39,055
There's been a serious
breakdown in security.
801
01:07:39,097 --> 01:07:41,057
The chateau has been
under surveillance for 7 hours.
802
01:07:41,099 --> 01:07:42,642
Deplorable!
803
01:07:42,684 --> 01:07:47,105
When the estate is re-secured
and quadrants checked,
804
01:07:47,146 --> 01:07:49,440
you will make a phone call to Mr. Helm
805
01:07:49,482 --> 01:07:52,318
and you will arrange to meet
him at the usual rendezvous.
806
01:08:00,076 --> 01:08:01,452
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
807
01:08:02,579 --> 01:08:04,289
Ho-ho-ho-hold it.
808
01:08:06,416 --> 01:08:07,625
Well, Matt.
809
01:08:08,918 --> 01:08:10,920
Oh, Mr. Macdonald!
810
01:08:10,962 --> 01:08:14,966
Freya! For pete's sake, Freya!
811
01:08:15,008 --> 01:08:16,426
Oh, let me look...
812
01:08:16,467 --> 01:08:19,304
Freya, how long has it been?
813
01:08:19,345 --> 01:08:22,015
Uh, Prague or maybe it
was the Jefferson affair...
814
01:08:22,056 --> 01:08:24,767
Now don't tell me that you
know Little Miss Foul-up here?
815
01:08:24,809 --> 01:08:26,019
Now just one minute.
816
01:08:26,060 --> 01:08:27,770
I was told to work directly under you,
817
01:08:27,812 --> 01:08:28,980
and you refused to cooperate.
818
01:08:29,022 --> 01:08:30,398
You say that again,
819
01:08:30,440 --> 01:08:32,609
I'm gonna teach you
to watch your language.
820
01:08:32,650 --> 01:08:35,445
Matt, I told you we'd give
you all the protection we could.
821
01:08:35,486 --> 01:08:37,322
She's my protection?
822
01:08:37,363 --> 01:08:39,365
She happens to be
with British intelligence.
823
01:08:39,407 --> 01:08:41,367
I get it. You're trying to get rid of me.
824
01:08:41,409 --> 01:08:43,119
And an extremely efficient one, too.
825
01:08:43,161 --> 01:08:44,704
As a matter of fact, I've established
826
01:08:44,746 --> 01:08:47,415
an observation post
above Contini's chateau.
827
01:08:47,457 --> 01:08:48,625
And what did you find out?
828
01:08:48,666 --> 01:08:50,335
Nothing at all.
829
01:08:50,376 --> 01:08:51,919
The agent was killed.
830
01:08:51,961 --> 01:08:54,005
Well, that figures.
831
01:08:54,047 --> 01:08:56,424
And, in addition, I
was extremely efficient
832
01:08:56,466 --> 01:08:58,551
at the tramway with Yu-rang, remember?
833
01:08:58,593 --> 01:09:01,429
Uh-huh. Oh, that was in the ladies' room.
834
01:09:01,471 --> 01:09:03,473
Wait a minute. Yu-rang is here?
835
01:09:03,514 --> 01:09:05,683
Mmm-hmm.
836
01:09:05,725 --> 01:09:07,560
Well, that's trouble in spades.
837
01:09:07,602 --> 01:09:09,145
She's Contini's top agent in hong kong.
838
01:09:09,187 --> 01:09:11,064
Matt, what inning is it?
839
01:09:11,105 --> 01:09:13,483
I think it's the 9th inning
and you're right on target.
840
01:09:13,524 --> 01:09:15,109
Contini is our guy.
841
01:09:15,151 --> 01:09:17,403
The United States is
holding a 5% finder's fee
842
01:09:17,445 --> 01:09:19,822
for that gold, and no questions asked.
843
01:09:19,864 --> 01:09:21,282
$50 million, huh?
844
01:09:21,324 --> 01:09:23,368
Well, I'm supposed to meet Linka tonight,
845
01:09:23,409 --> 01:09:26,329
and they've set me up for a hit.
846
01:09:26,371 --> 01:09:28,956
But I'm gonna shock
her out of her miniskirt.
847
01:09:28,998 --> 01:09:30,249
[PHONE RINGING]
848
01:09:30,291 --> 01:09:32,085
Oh, would you answer that, please?
849
01:09:32,126 --> 01:09:33,252
No, over there.
850
01:09:33,294 --> 01:09:35,880
And if it's little Linka, stall.
851
01:09:35,922 --> 01:09:38,257
You know what that means, stall.
852
01:09:39,634 --> 01:09:41,052
Mr. Helm's suite.
853
01:09:42,345 --> 01:09:44,305
Uh, no, he isn't at the moment.
854
01:09:44,347 --> 01:09:45,807
May I take a message?
855
01:09:47,475 --> 01:09:49,310
Thank you.
856
01:09:49,352 --> 01:09:51,104
It was your little Linka.
857
01:09:51,145 --> 01:09:53,189
Huh, they really think I'm buying.
858
01:09:53,231 --> 01:09:55,817
Now if only I knew where Yu-rang lived,
859
01:09:55,858 --> 01:09:59,404
I would have had a
cozy little chat with her.
860
01:09:59,445 --> 01:10:01,114
It just so happens that I know
861
01:10:01,155 --> 01:10:03,408
where Yu-rang hangs her kimono.
862
01:10:03,449 --> 01:10:05,910
I bet you do. 10-to-one, you don't.
863
01:10:07,453 --> 01:10:09,247
Bet.
864
01:10:09,288 --> 01:10:10,748
You just remember that
865
01:10:10,790 --> 01:10:12,917
this happens to be my home cricket pitch.
866
01:10:13,000 --> 01:10:16,337
Well, stop pitching
your cricket and give.
867
01:10:16,379 --> 01:10:18,589
The House of 7 Joys.
Number 5, Viking Street.
868
01:10:18,631 --> 01:10:20,216
10-to-one?
869
01:10:20,258 --> 01:10:22,051
[PHONE RINGING]
870
01:10:22,093 --> 01:10:23,219
Matt, hold it.
871
01:10:23,261 --> 01:10:24,721
Now, be sensible.
872
01:10:24,762 --> 01:10:26,723
Use your head for
something beside a target.
873
01:10:26,764 --> 01:10:28,266
You're walking into a firing squad.
874
01:10:28,307 --> 01:10:30,017
I'm glad you're worried about me,
875
01:10:30,059 --> 01:10:31,602
but, uh, I'm gonna be sensible.
876
01:10:31,644 --> 01:10:34,981
I'm using my head. I'm
not meeting Linka tonight.
877
01:10:35,022 --> 01:10:36,774
You're pickin' her up.
878
01:10:36,816 --> 01:10:38,484
[PHONE RINGING]
879
01:10:38,526 --> 01:10:40,236
Hello.
880
01:10:40,278 --> 01:10:42,822
Oh, hello, partner.
881
01:10:42,864 --> 01:10:45,825
We have a golden opportunity, partner.
882
01:10:47,577 --> 01:10:50,121
So why don't you meet
me as soon as possible
883
01:10:50,163 --> 01:10:53,666
at the House of 7 Joys. Viking street.
884
01:10:53,708 --> 01:10:57,420
Uh, no. It's honest time
now. The House of 7 Joys?
885
01:10:57,462 --> 01:11:00,214
That's, uh, Yu-rang's pad.
886
01:11:00,256 --> 01:11:03,968
(MATT) we'll meet in the
open. Uh, tivoli gardens.
887
01:11:04,051 --> 01:11:05,386
West gate.
888
01:11:05,428 --> 01:11:07,346
And one more thing, sweetheart.
889
01:11:07,388 --> 01:11:08,806
I know where the gold is,
890
01:11:08,848 --> 01:11:10,808
so that makes me the senior partner.
891
01:11:10,892 --> 01:11:11,851
[PHONE CLICKS]
892
01:11:16,147 --> 01:11:18,649
I believe he does know.
893
01:11:18,691 --> 01:11:19,692
He may,
894
01:11:21,152 --> 01:11:22,236
and he may not.
895
01:11:24,989 --> 01:11:27,200
But I can't afford to speculate.
896
01:11:59,482 --> 01:12:01,234
[TRANSMITTER BEEPING]
897
01:12:18,167 --> 01:12:19,669
Permit me, Mr. Helm.
898
01:12:24,298 --> 01:12:26,008
May I, Mr. Helm?
899
01:12:29,178 --> 01:12:30,263
Thank you.
900
01:12:30,304 --> 01:12:31,722
This way, please.
901
01:12:41,315 --> 01:12:43,401
May I call you "partner"?
902
01:12:43,442 --> 01:12:46,445
It was thoughtful of
you to call me, Mr. Helm,
903
01:12:46,487 --> 01:12:48,531
with such an attractive proposal.
904
01:12:48,573 --> 01:12:50,449
Oh, don't knock it, honey.
905
01:12:50,491 --> 01:12:52,660
The finder's fee is $50 million.
906
01:12:52,702 --> 01:12:55,454
No questions, no strings.
907
01:12:55,496 --> 01:12:57,832
His Excellency would have questions.
908
01:12:57,874 --> 01:13:00,960
Who's he gonna ask?
Other guys wearing stripes?
909
01:13:03,337 --> 01:13:05,756
What's to prevent me
taking the whole bowl of rice?
910
01:13:05,798 --> 01:13:07,633
The billion?
911
01:13:07,675 --> 01:13:10,928
Well, in the first place, you
don't have Contini's contacts,
912
01:13:12,430 --> 01:13:15,016
and you're too little for that much loot.
913
01:13:16,142 --> 01:13:17,852
And your share?
914
01:13:17,894 --> 01:13:21,230
Oh, I'm an agent of
I.C.E. I don't get one yen.
915
01:13:21,272 --> 01:13:24,400
Oh, you... you're
doing this only for duty?
916
01:13:24,442 --> 01:13:26,485
Well, you're a generous person.
917
01:13:26,527 --> 01:13:28,905
I figure, later on, christmas time,
918
01:13:28,946 --> 01:13:30,656
you might send me a card or something.
919
01:13:30,698 --> 01:13:32,325
Forgive me, Yu-rang.
920
01:13:32,366 --> 01:13:35,328
There's a call from your
headquarters in bombay.
921
01:13:35,369 --> 01:13:37,371
Oh, excuse me.
922
01:13:37,413 --> 01:13:39,165
Oh, no.
923
01:13:39,206 --> 01:13:42,335
Mr. Helm, betraying Massimo Contini
924
01:13:42,376 --> 01:13:44,795
is both dangerous and unprofitable.
925
01:13:48,341 --> 01:13:49,675
[SNAPS FINGERS]
926
01:14:08,486 --> 01:14:10,279
Mr. Helm.
927
01:14:10,321 --> 01:14:13,366
You've caused me a
great deal of inconvenience.
928
01:14:15,826 --> 01:14:19,246
Well, you have to admit
it's been a 2-way street.
929
01:14:19,288 --> 01:14:22,083
Were you tempted by his offer, my dear?
930
01:14:22,124 --> 01:14:24,669
Of course not, Your Excellency.
931
01:14:24,710 --> 01:14:29,382
That offer, Mr. Helm,
removed my last nagging doubt.
932
01:14:29,423 --> 01:14:31,384
You don't know where the gold is,
933
01:14:31,425 --> 01:14:33,552
otherwise you would not have attempted
934
01:14:33,594 --> 01:14:36,180
to corrupt my loyal servant, Yu-rang.
935
01:14:37,848 --> 01:14:40,142
Oh, we know where it is.
936
01:14:40,184 --> 01:14:43,437
And, uh, that offer was
plain common sense.
937
01:14:43,479 --> 01:14:46,691
We want to avoid publicity
and also we want to avoid
938
01:14:46,732 --> 01:14:48,275
killing a couple of dozen people.
939
01:14:48,317 --> 01:14:49,902
No.
940
01:14:49,944 --> 01:14:52,947
Now I can proceed precisely on schedule.
941
01:14:54,407 --> 01:14:56,450
Well, uh, you've forgotten something.
942
01:14:56,492 --> 01:14:58,911
I'm here. You're here.
943
01:14:58,953 --> 01:15:00,997
Yu-rang and her friendly apes are here.
944
01:15:02,206 --> 01:15:05,209
But where is Macdonald?
945
01:15:07,044 --> 01:15:10,089
I would like to play
poker with you, Mr. Helm,
946
01:15:10,131 --> 01:15:12,717
because you lie so unconvincingly.
947
01:15:13,884 --> 01:15:14,927
[TAPPING]
948
01:15:16,220 --> 01:15:17,388
[BUZZING]
949
01:15:29,567 --> 01:15:30,526
[THUDS]
950
01:15:33,529 --> 01:15:35,072
Just in the nick of time.
951
01:15:38,117 --> 01:15:39,827
I was terribly disappointed
952
01:15:39,869 --> 01:15:42,872
that you couldn't keep
our rendezvous, Mr. Helm.
953
01:15:42,913 --> 01:15:44,498
But Mr. Macdonald proved to be
954
01:15:44,540 --> 01:15:47,543
very cooperative, shall we say?
955
01:15:47,585 --> 01:15:50,755
Oh, that's Mac, all
right. Anything to help.
956
01:15:50,796 --> 01:15:52,673
But one thing, we gotta get going.
957
01:15:54,967 --> 01:15:56,469
[BUZZING]
958
01:16:07,855 --> 01:16:10,566
Well, if it isn't Miss Carlson.
959
01:16:12,485 --> 01:16:15,780
My dear, you must be
terribly dedicated to your work
960
01:16:15,821 --> 01:16:18,157
to wear an atrocious wig like that.
961
01:16:19,658 --> 01:16:22,244
How very common of you to mention it.
962
01:16:43,182 --> 01:16:46,769
Your question, I believe,
was, "where is Mr. Macdonald?"
963
01:16:49,688 --> 01:16:52,024
You sure are somethin', Count.
964
01:16:52,066 --> 01:16:54,777
But I gotta tell you, I'm
holdin' aces, back-to-back.
965
01:16:55,945 --> 01:16:57,488
You're called, Mr. Helm.
966
01:16:59,532 --> 01:17:00,699
Operation Rainbow.
967
01:17:03,828 --> 01:17:05,329
Go on.
968
01:17:05,371 --> 01:17:07,456
Lola Medina.
969
01:17:07,498 --> 01:17:09,708
The wild gypsy with the wise old pappy,
970
01:17:09,750 --> 01:17:11,293
and the noisy bottles.
971
01:17:11,335 --> 01:17:13,003
She was your fun and games
972
01:17:13,045 --> 01:17:15,840
while Operation Rainbow
was being planned.
973
01:17:15,881 --> 01:17:18,384
And you want to know
something about gypsies?
974
01:17:18,425 --> 01:17:20,886
They love to drink and they love to talk.
975
01:17:22,221 --> 01:17:25,224
I'm sorry you said that, Mr. Helm.
976
01:17:25,266 --> 01:17:29,186
Because it brings our
pleasant little chat to an end.
977
01:17:29,228 --> 01:17:30,354
[BUTTON CLICKING]
978
01:17:30,396 --> 01:17:32,022
Hold on, Mac.
979
01:17:35,317 --> 01:17:36,527
[BUZZING]
980
01:17:41,323 --> 01:17:42,700
[PHONE BUZZING]
981
01:17:54,795 --> 01:17:57,089
The tracks have been
cleared to Luxembourg.
982
01:17:57,131 --> 01:17:59,091
Proceed to phase 8 immediately.
983
01:18:02,928 --> 01:18:07,349
Be so good as to execute
Messieurs Helm and Macdonald.
984
01:18:07,391 --> 01:18:09,351
And don't forget Miss Carlson.
985
01:18:25,159 --> 01:18:26,493
[GLASS SHATTERING]
986
01:18:33,626 --> 01:18:34,793
[GRUNTING]
987
01:18:39,924 --> 01:18:40,883
[GROANING]
988
01:18:42,009 --> 01:18:43,427
[MEN EXCLAIMING]
989
01:18:47,306 --> 01:18:48,933
[MEN GRUNTING]
990
01:19:00,694 --> 01:19:02,655
Raise the inside cylinder.
991
01:19:04,406 --> 01:19:06,242
Remove the glass wall.
992
01:19:08,202 --> 01:19:09,495
[BUZZING]
993
01:19:09,536 --> 01:19:11,247
And get ready.
994
01:19:25,135 --> 01:19:26,762
How very unfortunate.
995
01:19:26,804 --> 01:19:27,763
Tsk, tsk.
996
01:19:36,397 --> 01:19:37,731
Get our pal to a hospital.
997
01:19:37,773 --> 01:19:40,067
Oh, never mind me. Just stop Contini.
998
01:19:54,081 --> 01:19:55,291
[SIGHING]
999
01:19:55,332 --> 01:19:56,583
That could have been you.
1000
01:19:56,625 --> 01:19:57,793
Never.
1001
01:19:57,835 --> 01:20:00,004
Never. Never. Never. Never. Never.
1002
01:20:00,045 --> 01:20:00,921
[MUMBLING]
1003
01:20:03,424 --> 01:20:04,717
[BUZZING]
1004
01:20:11,432 --> 01:20:12,725
[PHONE BUZZING]
1005
01:20:13,851 --> 01:20:15,060
Hurry it up.
1006
01:20:15,102 --> 01:20:16,228
Yes, Your Excellency.
1007
01:20:16,270 --> 01:20:17,271
Don't just stand there.
1008
01:20:17,313 --> 01:20:18,981
Yes, Your Excellency.
1009
01:20:19,023 --> 01:20:21,734
The shipment will be
en route to Luxembourg
1010
01:20:21,775 --> 01:20:23,319
at h-hour minus 10.
1011
01:20:40,419 --> 01:20:42,838
Yu-rang, intercept Matt Helm.
1012
01:20:42,921 --> 01:20:46,717
(CONTINI) He's traveling towards
the chateau, south by southwest.
1013
01:20:46,759 --> 01:20:48,886
Yes, Your Excellency.
1014
01:20:48,927 --> 01:20:50,095
Turn around.
1015
01:21:01,732 --> 01:21:04,777
Turn left at the intersection.
I know a shortcut.
1016
01:21:07,279 --> 01:21:08,489
Are you sure?
1017
01:21:08,530 --> 01:21:10,324
Yes, I'm sure. Turn left.
1018
01:21:13,702 --> 01:21:15,412
Must be the wig.
1019
01:21:15,454 --> 01:21:17,039
I beg your pardon?
1020
01:21:17,081 --> 01:21:18,332
Well, I mean you...
1021
01:21:20,501 --> 01:21:23,670
At the House of 7 Joys,
you didn't do one thing wrong.
1022
01:21:43,023 --> 01:21:44,483
Turn right, right here.
1023
01:22:18,350 --> 01:22:19,977
Somebody put a river here.
1024
01:22:24,106 --> 01:22:26,233
I'll see if it's too deep to cross.
1025
01:22:54,094 --> 01:22:55,304
It's fine.
1026
01:22:57,931 --> 01:22:59,099
[SCREAMING]
1027
01:23:02,352 --> 01:23:03,770
[WATER GURGLING]
1028
01:23:40,933 --> 01:23:41,934
It's too deep.
1029
01:23:43,060 --> 01:23:44,394
Too deep, huh?
1030
01:23:46,480 --> 01:23:49,024
Look, I want to ask you... I
want to ask you a question.
1031
01:23:49,066 --> 01:23:50,817
Whose side are you on?
1032
01:23:54,655 --> 01:23:57,324
Well, I'm an agent.
1033
01:23:57,366 --> 01:23:59,701
And I... I also happen to be a good one.
1034
01:24:00,953 --> 01:24:02,579
And I'm also a woman.
1035
01:24:07,209 --> 01:24:08,877
It was the wig.
1036
01:24:08,919 --> 01:24:10,837
[HIGH-PITCHED BUZZING]
1037
01:24:10,921 --> 01:24:13,757
Get rid of it! Throw it! Throw it!
1038
01:24:15,217 --> 01:24:16,301
Not at me!
1039
01:24:19,763 --> 01:24:20,973
[EXCLAIMING]
1040
01:24:27,604 --> 01:24:29,398
(YU-RANG) Ching! To the river!
1041
01:24:37,364 --> 01:24:39,908
I want to talk to you.
1042
01:24:39,950 --> 01:24:42,953
I want to talk to you, too,
after the job's finished.
1043
01:25:12,649 --> 01:25:15,277
Mr. Helm, I'm afraid the car is broken.
1044
01:25:15,319 --> 01:25:16,403
The car's broken?
1045
01:25:16,445 --> 01:25:17,529
Yes.
1046
01:25:17,571 --> 01:25:19,656
Oh, my hat! My hat's ok.
1047
01:25:25,037 --> 01:25:26,288
Hey, come here.
1048
01:25:30,626 --> 01:25:32,169
Your hat's not broken, huh?
1049
01:25:32,210 --> 01:25:33,712
No.
1050
01:25:33,754 --> 01:25:36,548
Your head's broken.
Grab a hold. That's right.
1051
01:25:36,590 --> 01:25:37,924
[BOTH GRUNTING]
1052
01:26:17,255 --> 01:26:18,382
You through?
1053
01:26:43,365 --> 01:26:44,825
You are on their side.
1054
01:26:44,866 --> 01:26:46,118
I am not.
1055
01:27:08,348 --> 01:27:09,391
Up you go.
1056
01:27:13,019 --> 01:27:15,439
Uh, Mr... Mr. Helm, I
think you should know
1057
01:27:15,480 --> 01:27:17,607
that I-I'm a bit of a
coward about flying.
1058
01:27:17,649 --> 01:27:19,067
Good.
1059
01:27:19,109 --> 01:27:21,445
Mr. Helm! Look!
1060
01:27:25,365 --> 01:27:26,825
[HIGH-PITCHED BUZZING]
1061
01:27:40,881 --> 01:27:42,591
[HELICOPTER WHIRRING]
1062
01:27:52,601 --> 01:27:53,894
Contini's.
1063
01:28:27,052 --> 01:28:29,262
Band 05, come in.
1064
01:28:31,640 --> 01:28:33,308
Are you reading me, Matt?
1065
01:28:33,350 --> 01:28:35,018
Time's running out, Mr. Macdonald
1066
01:28:35,060 --> 01:28:36,853
for the British pound,
the American dollar,
1067
01:28:36,895 --> 01:28:38,146
the free world.
1068
01:28:38,188 --> 01:28:39,523
I can send in a division of troops.
1069
01:28:39,564 --> 01:28:41,274
No. No.
1070
01:28:43,109 --> 01:28:45,695
Until I contact Matt,
we can't make a move.
1071
01:28:50,367 --> 01:28:52,786
Get on with it, frankie. Move it nearer.
1072
01:28:52,828 --> 01:28:54,079
Yes, Your Excellency.
1073
01:28:54,120 --> 01:28:55,413
[CAR HORN HONKING]
1074
01:29:04,548 --> 01:29:05,632
Matt Helm.
1075
01:29:07,509 --> 01:29:09,302
They will take care of Mr. Helm's
1076
01:29:09,344 --> 01:29:11,346
terminal liquidation. Come on.
1077
01:29:14,057 --> 01:29:16,184
If they happen to fail,
you will execute plan 2.
1078
01:29:16,226 --> 01:29:17,602
Yes, Your Excellency.
1079
01:29:17,644 --> 01:29:19,271
Unfortunately, I can't stay to savor
1080
01:29:19,312 --> 01:29:20,605
Mr. Helm's final departure.
1081
01:29:20,647 --> 01:29:22,774
But Luxembourg, I
shall expect you to dine.
1082
01:29:23,900 --> 01:29:26,027
[HELICOPTER APPROACHING]
1083
01:29:32,576 --> 01:29:34,578
He's landing behind the chateau.
1084
01:29:43,587 --> 01:29:44,754
Let's go!
1085
01:29:55,557 --> 01:29:56,808
[GUN FIRING]
1086
01:29:58,351 --> 01:30:00,437
From the window there!
1087
01:30:00,478 --> 01:30:02,731
[FIRING CONTINUES]
1088
01:30:04,399 --> 01:30:05,734
[GROANING]
1089
01:30:05,817 --> 01:30:06,902
[SCREAMING]
1090
01:30:33,470 --> 01:30:35,221
[HIGH-PITCHED WHISTLING]
1091
01:31:00,497 --> 01:31:02,290
Mr. Helm.
1092
01:31:02,332 --> 01:31:03,333
Goodbye.
1093
01:31:09,422 --> 01:31:11,222
Our business must remain unfinished.
1094
01:31:12,342 --> 01:31:13,510
I'm sorry, Matt.
1095
01:31:35,782 --> 01:31:37,993
[HIGH-PITCHED WHISTLING]
1096
01:31:59,055 --> 01:32:00,390
[MACHINE GUN FIRING]
1097
01:32:33,214 --> 01:32:34,382
[GRUNTING]
1098
01:32:39,554 --> 01:32:40,764
[GRUNTING]
1099
01:33:18,676 --> 01:33:20,345
[BOTH EXCLAIMING]
1100
01:33:39,489 --> 01:33:40,657
[INAUDIBLE]
1101
01:33:52,168 --> 01:33:53,378
Oh, dear.
1102
01:33:53,419 --> 01:33:54,379
[PANTING]
1103
01:34:00,093 --> 01:34:01,344
[GROANING]
1104
01:34:02,971 --> 01:34:04,222
[YELLING]
1105
01:34:13,314 --> 01:34:16,359
Just a minute. I'm not
through with you yet.
1106
01:35:15,043 --> 01:35:16,169
[YELLING]
1107
01:35:27,555 --> 01:35:28,765
[YELLING]
1108
01:36:00,380 --> 01:36:03,883
I could indulge myself
by killing you, Mr. Helm.
1109
01:36:03,925 --> 01:36:05,885
But I will leave that small chore
1110
01:36:05,927 --> 01:36:07,679
to your colleague, Miss Carlson.
1111
01:36:25,655 --> 01:36:28,199
Oh, no. Oh!
1112
01:36:49,637 --> 01:36:51,055
[DOOR OPENING]
1113
01:36:58,771 --> 01:37:00,189
Aah!
1114
01:37:04,235 --> 01:37:06,487
Oh! I'm... I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?
1115
01:37:06,529 --> 01:37:08,114
Of course you hurt me.
1116
01:37:09,240 --> 01:37:10,700
[EXCLAIMS]
1117
01:37:14,746 --> 01:37:16,331
Ok, let's...
1118
01:37:16,372 --> 01:37:18,416
No, no, no, come with
me. I know a better way.
1119
01:37:18,458 --> 01:37:20,376
Are you sure it's not occupied?
1120
01:37:46,736 --> 01:37:48,363
Isn't this fun?
1121
01:37:54,369 --> 01:37:56,162
Well, isn't it?
1122
01:38:27,777 --> 01:38:29,695
Oh, isn't this wonderful?
1123
01:38:31,656 --> 01:38:32,824
I just can't wait.
1124
01:38:33,950 --> 01:38:35,493
You can't wait?
1125
01:38:35,535 --> 01:38:38,413
You know, like you
say, to have our little talk.
1126
01:38:50,049 --> 01:38:52,093
Mr. Helm, there it is! There!
1127
01:39:17,493 --> 01:39:19,078
Oh, isn't this exciting?
1128
01:39:53,613 --> 01:39:55,364
[BOTH GRUNTING]
1129
01:40:02,038 --> 01:40:03,331
[SCREAMING]
1130
01:40:30,358 --> 01:40:32,902
Are you comfortable, my dear?
1131
01:40:32,944 --> 01:40:35,029
Yes, very comfortable, thank you.
1132
01:40:36,489 --> 01:40:38,533
Mr. Helm!
1133
01:40:38,574 --> 01:40:40,743
Mr. Helm!
1134
01:40:53,923 --> 01:40:57,635
Mr. Helm, I lost my... I lost my hat!
1135
01:41:01,806 --> 01:41:04,850
(FREYA) Mr. Helm! I'm slipping!
1136
01:41:09,230 --> 01:41:11,232
I'm slipping!
1137
01:41:11,274 --> 01:41:12,316
[GRUNTS]
1138
01:41:21,284 --> 01:41:22,368
[SCREAMING]
1139
01:41:32,587 --> 01:41:35,214
Mr. Helm, is my hair a mess?
1140
01:41:36,382 --> 01:41:37,466
What?
1141
01:41:37,508 --> 01:41:38,843
Is my hair a mess?
1142
01:41:38,884 --> 01:41:40,761
You wanna know the truth? Yeah.
1143
01:41:40,803 --> 01:41:42,054
You're a mess!
1144
01:41:56,444 --> 01:41:58,446
[PHONE BUZZING]
1145
01:42:01,324 --> 01:42:02,950
Mr. Macdonald... Hold it. Hold it.
1146
01:42:02,992 --> 01:42:05,786
I'm getting through to him. Matt?
1147
01:42:05,828 --> 01:42:08,289
Matt, where the hell are you?
1148
01:42:08,331 --> 01:42:10,708
Oh, I'm in Contini's diesel.
1149
01:42:10,750 --> 01:42:12,501
And what's left of him is... is
1150
01:42:12,543 --> 01:42:15,129
up the track about 30
miles from his chateau.
1151
01:42:16,339 --> 01:42:18,549
Yeah... yeah, I got the gold.
1152
01:42:18,591 --> 01:42:20,551
And I got a couple of questions.
1153
01:42:20,593 --> 01:42:23,387
Where do I take it and
how do you stop this thing?
1154
01:42:23,429 --> 01:42:26,265
Don't stop. We're rerouting
you to Copenhagen
1155
01:42:26,307 --> 01:42:27,725
on automatic signals.
1156
01:42:27,767 --> 01:42:30,019
We'll take over from there. And, Matt,
1157
01:42:30,061 --> 01:42:32,521
(MACDONALD) Don't let
one damn thing go wrong.
1158
01:43:13,521 --> 01:43:15,022
Nothing will go wrong.
1159
01:43:31,872 --> 01:43:35,501
Hey, do you think we can have our
1160
01:43:35,543 --> 01:43:37,086
little talk now?
1161
01:43:45,469 --> 01:43:48,180
♪ We're gonna talk a little ♪
1162
01:43:48,222 --> 01:43:50,307
♪ kiss a little ♪
1163
01:43:50,349 --> 01:43:54,478
♪ nothing's gonna
stop our bliss a little ♪
1164
01:43:54,520 --> 01:43:56,480
♪ and when our talk is through ♪
1165
01:43:56,522 --> 01:43:58,274
♪ about me and you ♪
1166
01:44:02,027 --> 01:44:04,155
[TRAIN WHEELS SCREECHING]
1167
01:44:25,593 --> 01:44:27,762
(MALE CHORUS) ♪ on the
street of many pleasures ♪
1168
01:44:27,803 --> 01:44:29,722
(FEMALE CHORUS) ♪
street of many pleasures ♪
1169
01:44:29,764 --> 01:44:31,474
♪ stands the House of 7 Joys ♪
1170
01:44:31,515 --> 01:44:33,517
♪ House of 7 Joys ♪
1171
01:44:33,559 --> 01:44:35,519
♪ like you see it in the movies ♪
1172
01:44:35,561 --> 01:44:37,438
♪ see it in the movies ♪
1173
01:44:37,480 --> 01:44:39,315
♪ it's for groovy girls and boys ♪
1174
01:44:39,356 --> 01:44:40,775
♪ groovy girls and boys ♪
1175
01:44:40,816 --> 01:44:43,235
♪ yeah, in this oriental palace ♪
1176
01:44:43,277 --> 01:44:44,695
♪ pa pa pa ♪
1177
01:44:44,737 --> 01:44:46,864
♪ you are welcome night and day ♪
1178
01:44:46,906 --> 01:44:48,199
♪ pa pa pa ♪
1179
01:44:48,240 --> 01:44:51,702
♪ recommended by Matt Helm ♪
1180
01:44:51,744 --> 01:44:54,079
♪ and by the A.A.A. ♪
1181
01:44:54,121 --> 01:44:55,456
(BOTH) ♪ ah so ♪
80320
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