Original subtitles

The Alvin Show. You're positively gonna

love The Alvin Show. There's games to

build, and what is more?Here's the

boy who giggles known as Theodore.

Now you see, on camera three, the

brother known as Simon on the family

tree. And here's the star of the show,

Alvin! Alvin!

Baby, here we go Here's the happy

song

Yes, Mr. Kilhanjian, I promise you, I'll

have the song done in time. What?

Will you play with us?No. But we

don't have anything to do. Well, do

something. Yes, Mr. Cohanjan. Look,

I'm working. Don't Don't worry, Mr.

Cohanjan. I'll get the song done. Yes,

Mr. Cohanjan. Yes, sir.

Whatever you want. No. Now,

what do you want?We don't have anything

to do. Now, look, boys, I'm very busy, so

just go outside and do something.

Sure, Dave. What?I don't

know what. Use your imagination. Do

something, but do it outside.

What?Calvin!

What'll we do?I didn't know.

What do you want to do?I don't

know. Want to build something?

What?I don't know. How

about a birdhouse?Yeah.

Maybe we could get us a bird to play

with. Sure. A robin. Or a

bluebird. What's the matter with an

eagle?

What a beautiful eagle house. Yeah.

All we need now is an eagle. That's

easy. All you gotta do is close

your eyes and think, Eagle. umm

Naturally. How did he get

here?Did you fly?Umm

Maybe he can't fly.

Are you afraid to fly?

I'll fix that. When I get

through with you, you will

fly.

Now, Stanley, don't be afraid.

Once you get up plenty of speed,

raise your wings, and you will fly!

Stanley! Go, Stanley, go! Raise your

wings! Stanley,

raise your

wings!

Stanley,didn't raise your wings.

Steady, Stanley, old boy. Wings up.

Stretch 'em way out. Okay,

ready for takeoff?Let's go!

We did

it! Yes, Stanley! You're flying!

No, Stanley!

Don't push down! Then, old boy, you're

out of condition. We gotta build up

your flying muscles. Maybe he needs food.

Hey, that's right. Doo-doo-doo.

Dave, can I have 25 cents for

eagle food?Sure, here. Thanks.

Eagle food. What an imagination.

Okay, Stanley, I think you're ready.

First,You gotta get used to high places.

Ready, man?Up! Up!

Up!

Keep it up, fellas. I got an

idea. Doo-doo-doo. Dave,

I gotta borrow your skis. Doo-doo.

Sure. Doo-doo. My

skis?Alvin, why do you want

my skis?I'm gonna shove Stanley off the

roof. Hold it, Alvin. You can't shove

Stanley off the roof. And who is

Stanley?He's my eagle.

Come here, Alvin. You have no

eagle. Eagles live only in high

mountains. They're never where people

are. They fly only at an

elevation of, uh.. 14

th... What was that?That's

Stanley, the eagle. Eagle?

That's a wild eagle. I'll call the

police. Now, don't panic, Alvin.

Operator, emergency. P-Police, there's a

wild eagle in my yard. That's right,

wild eagle. Alvin, don't go outside.

I know they live only in high places.

Alvin, come back here. Where's Simon and

Theodore?I know they never-- I tell you,

there's an eagle. Yeah, a

40-foot wingspan eagle.

Stanley, do you know you're an

eagle?

And do you know how brave you are?And

how proud you are?How

strong you are?And the best

thing you know how to do is fly?So

come on, Stanley!You can do it! Yeah,

Stanley! Come

on! Hooray! I knew you could do it,

Henry, old boy! Come

and visit us again, Stanley! Come on,

old pal! Goodbye, Stanley!this way, men.

Arrest that eagle. What eagle?

Are you blind?That eagle.

Alvin, where's that eagle?

Alvin, tell him about the eagle. Eagle?

Eagles live only in high mountains.

They're never in-- Now, cut that out.

Tell him about Stanley. Stanley?

Yeah, Stanley the Eagle, you know And

that's his house! Stanley the

Eagle, and that's his

house. Come with us, Seville. You've been

making too many of them nutty records.

Now, wait a minute. Alvin, tell him about

Stanley! Tell him about Stanley the

Eagle! Alvin! Alvin! Alvin!

What are you writing?Nothing. Well, don't

just stand there. Write something.

And here's something you'll really enjoy.

All

right, fellas, are you all ready for the

archery contest?Yeah,

I'll say. All right,

Theodore, you're first.

Bravo! You're next, Simon.

Very good, Simon. Okay, Alvin, let's

see what you can do.

Well, boys, here we are in beautiful

Italy. This is the city of Venice, the

city of romance and singing, a city

filled with gondolasAnd the

boat. Alvin, a gondola is a boat. Hey,

let's take a gondola away. It's

a All right, fellas, a good idea. And

we'll ask the gondolier to sing. What's a

gondolier?A gondolier, Alvin, is-- you

see that man with the big mustache?He's a

gondolier. Come on, let's get into his

boat, and maybe he'll sing.

Ohh

ohh

Hey, you, Mouse, pipe down. I'm here.

Hey, Alvin,

chipmunk. My chipmunk, schmidtmunk,

silencio. Be quiet, will you?I'm

singing. Alvin, will you please sit down,

and will you please let the gondoliersing?

Okay, okayOhh

ohh Are

you like that, a little mooses?

Listen,

we

are. We are

not friends We're singing chipmunks

We told

you friends We

Don't call right now.

I know I don't believe. She's singing a

mousse out.

Boys, please sit down and stop arguing.

Now, Now let's all try to get along. Mr.

Gondolier, would you let the boys sing

with you?Uh, shoot, that's okay. Let'sgo.

Well, when I tell them my kids I've been

singing with three--

Fellas, Mr. Gondolier, boys, will

you please sit down?I think the boat's

beginning to sink. Mr.

Gondolier,

Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me

great pleasure... No,

Alvin, you're supposed to introduce the

great inventor. Ohh Ladies

and gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure

to introduce the great inventor,

Thomas Elha-- No! Alexander

Gray-- No! Wilbur and Arthur-- No!

Wilson who?Clyde Crashcop.

Clyde Crashcop.

Leonardo, I have just completed a study

of modern man, and I don't like what I

see. Seen from the

outside, he appears a picture of calm and

contentment. Now, let

us look on the inside. Here

we see the result of hustle and bustle,

hassle and tassel, hurry and worry, come

and go. Work,

work, work. It

is imperative that man should have

relief from all this bonk bonk drip,

drip, snap, bang, tick, tick, and ding,

ding-a-ling. Now, what

can I do to help mankind

again?Let me see.

What he needs is something that will

provide relaxation and pleasure.

A game! That's it. I'll invent a

game. Pencil Leonardo. Now

first, I shall create a

circular form, a sphere,

a spheroid, a ball!

Oh, ohh all right, Leonardo, if you

insist. Details, details,

details. Does that satisfy you?

Next, I shall provide a means for

propelling the ball through space. And

here it is.

The Boot.

Now what, Leonardo?Oh,

ohh all right, for heaven's sake. Bat.

At times, Leonardo, I find you very

trying. Now, where was I?Oh, yes.

Now that we have a game so basic and

an object so ball, I shall call

it--

Basic Ball. And now?

Careful, Leonardo, never point a bat at

anyone. There,

Leonardo, there is a proper and an

improper way to do things. Now,

swing.

That's more like it. However,

Leonardo, in this game, we shall endeavor

to hit only the ball. Come

along, try it again.

Leonardo, I believe this game should be

played out of doors.

We need an arena.

This game will become the great national

pastime, Leonardo, mark my word.

Next, I shall create the

Spectator, or Fan. That's

fa-fa-fa and an-fa-an Fan, the man who

comes here seeking pleasure and

relaxation in a happy, friendly

spirit of good sportsmanship. Kill the

bum!Very

good. Now to perfect the game

itself. The bat, Leonardo.

This I will call first place.

This being first, naturally, the opposite

shall be second, followed by

third. And now,

Leonardo, what comes after third?

Home! Leonardo, won't you

ever learn after third comes

fourth?

There, the perfect

baseball diamond.

And now, let us choose sides.

Remember, Leonardo, whoever achieves the

top hold on the bat handle has the first

choice of player. Ready?

I win. Therefore, Leonardo, I choose

me, and you are left with you.

Now, let the game

begin. Take your place in the

throwing area. No,

no, Leonardo, not that way.

Now remember, the purpose of this game is

to hit the ball with the bat.

Now, hitch the bat!

Kill the bomb! Kill the

bomb!

Leonardo, somehow this doesn't seem

quite right. HmmThe

solution, as you will see, is to exchange

places.

Ready, Leonardo?Try it again.

Perfect. Now throw the bomb

out! My dear fan,

you were brought here to relax and enjoy

yourself. So will you please relax

and enjoy yourself?

One moment, folks. What this game needs

is someone to maintain law and order, an

impartial arbiter whose decision shall be

final.

Now, sir, call them as you see

them.

Well, sir, if you insist.

Leonardo, we must do what the umpire

says. This time, pitch the

ball. Pitch the

ball?What a ridiculous idea.

Oh, well. Play ball!

Strike one! What do you

mean, strike?That's stir

for stir and Ike for Ike strike!

Oh yes, surely, of course.

Strike two! Strike

two?Obviously, you are blind

as a bat, sir. Kill the bomb!

Strike three, you're out. Out

were you!

Ladies and gentlemen, I hope to be with

you next week. But

in the meantime, let me point out that

relaxation is an art. One must work at

it. Voila!

Well, boys, have you been studying your

French history?The Cathedral of Notre

Dame took 200 years to build.

Very good, Simon. The Eiffel Tower is

98485.

Good, Theodore. How about you, Alvin?

Where's Alvin?He got off a little

while ago.

Good evening, Manzo.

My name is Alvin, and I'm alone in

your beautiful city. How about showing

me around?You

don't parway English?Well, I

don't parway much French either, but I'll

try my best. Bonjour.

Bonjour. I

wish I could be friends.

I wish I could be

friends.

I

wish I could be

friends.

Where mama?How much love?What's wrong?

Like to meet your... your mama

and your pepper?

Mama! Mama!

I'll be, I wish I could be fun.

You mean you will go out with me?

Wow!

Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to invent

a brief word or two. It is not often when

I'm asked in reference to and on the

basis of...

This is The Alvin

Show, The Alvin Show. You're positive in

the kernel of The Alvin Show. There's

gates to build, and one is more.

Here's the boy who giggles known as

Theodore. Now you see, on

camera three, the brother known as Simon

on the family tree. And here's the

star of the show, Alvin!

Alvin!

Hey, you, get off that car shoe! Beat it!

All right, you stupid ostrich. Get out

and stay out!

Just a minute, sir. That's no way to

treat a helpless ostrich. Listen, mister,

that bird is driving me nuts. You see

that little car?She thinks it's an egg.

And for two weeks, she's been trying to

hatch it. Now, I'm running a car lot,

mister, not an incubator.

Ah, gee, Dave,

she's broken-hearted. She wants

her egg. We gotta help her. I'm

sorry, boys, there's nothing we can do.

Ostriches can't hatch cars. Now let's go.

Theodore. Simon. Alvin, I

said let's go. Okay, Dave. Hey,

Dave. Wait a minute. This man

wants to see ya. Ah, Mr.

Savelle. Yes?I'm sorry I

didn't recognize you at first, sir.

You're the man who writes those, uh,

records I'm so crazy

about. Yes. He wants your

autograph, Dave. Why, certainly.

On that bottom line, Dave. Oh,

thank you, sir. It's a pleasure.

Come on, Alvin. Here's your contract,

Dave. Contract?That's right, sir.

You have just bought an egg. A

car. I did what?I know

you two will be very happy together.

Alvin?Yes, Dave?

What,

Dave?Oh, never

mind.

Great scout, officer, look at that!

I know, it's that guy who writes those

nutty records.

Fill her up. Uh, which one, sir?The egg,

of course. Say,

aren't you the guy that writes those

nutty records?Never mind that, just fill

her up.

Mama, look! Wilver, don't stare.

It's only that man who writes those nutty

records. Alvin, you've disgraced me for

the last time. It's bad enough tricking

me into buying this car, but I'm not

going to play chauffeur to that ostrich.

I'll be the laughing stocker. Well,

stop honking and come on around.

This

is impossible. That bird can't just sit

on my car forever. Yeah, maybe

in her hats. Theodore, don't be

ridiculous. I may be stuck with a car,

but that ostrich has got to go. Dave,

she might get cold outside. Can she have

it in the house?Alvin!

Okay. Who stole my blanket, Simon?

Theodore! Alvin!

Good night, Henrietta.

Oh, Alvin.

All right, you. End of the line. You're

getting off. Come on. Get

off, I said. Let go!

I said let go!

Stop,

Dave! You're breaking! Dave?

You just can't fool around with old

Mother Nature. You're very

prudent, Mr. Seville. No car owner should

be without insurance. Is that the

car, sir?That's it. Right there.

Is that part of the equipment?

Unfortunately, yes. HmmLet's

see. Insure

car without

ostrich. Yes.

Car with ostrich. No.

Couldn't you make it a package deal, car

and ostrich?

Umm There's nothing in the book that

covers car and ostrich, Mr. Seville.

Can't I even have fire insurance?Mr.

Seville, ostriches are highly

flammable. Good day, sir. And

don't drive that car without insurance.

It's illegal. Uh, by the way,

aren't you the man who-- Yeah!

Hey, Dave. What's the idea?I'll tell you

what's the idea. The idea is no more

TV until you get that ostrich off the

car. But she's hatching it. Alvin,

that ostrich couldn't hatch anything out

of that car if she sat on it for a

thousand years. Either you get that bird

off that car, or no more

TV! You mean I can't even watch

me?No, not for a year.

But, Dave... Make that two years!

No TV for two years?Wowie!

What are we gonna do?I know what

I'm gonna do. What, Alvin?I'm gonna

think. I can't drive with

the ostrich. I can't get her off the car.

She... Maybe it'll hatch. Ohh Dave,

quick! Come outside! Something's

happening to the car! Alvin, I'm about

fed up with your tricks. But it's

hacking! Alvin, that's impossible and you

know it! Don't fight mother love, Dave.

Hey, hurry up!

Look! It's going deep,

deep, Dave!

It's probably the fan belt. I'll just

check the, uh..

It's unbelievable! It's

amazing! It's a miracle!

It's Alvin! Isn't

nature wonderful?

Ostrich. That's good, Alvin. Can you do a

hippopotamus?Yep-o-potamus.

Now, wait till you see the next one.

oh

Hi, everybody. The Chipmunks and I took a

trip to Mexico recently, and we'd like to

tell you about it.

It's a land filled with romance,

a picturesque country of old world charm,

magnificent buildings,

historical monuments.

Traveling with the boys is such a

rewarding experience.

It gives us a wonderful feeling of

togetherness.

Market day is exciting in Mexico.

You can have so much fun bargaining for

souvenirs.

You're forever enticed by the aroma of

the exotic foods.

I was enchanted by the scenic splendor. I

said to the boys, It's a beautiful

country filled with music. What's that

over there?Boy, look at all the people.

Yeah, what's that?That's a bull ring,

boys. They're about to have a bullfight.

I wanna play the bull. Me too! Let's go!

Now hang on, fellas. You can't just walk

into the middle of a bullring. This

danger is in there. We

wanna fight.

Hooray! We know we can

be the bow You can bet

your sombrero Hooray!

Lady was a man who'd raise

In his grave If he's brave

They will swoon and throw us a rope

When I touch the bow in the know

We wanted to fight a bull.

We must have been crazy.

Instead of a fight, we are drinking milk.

Sure, drag a bull

named for baby. Hooray!

Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me

great pleasure... No,

Alvin, you're supposed to introduce the

great inventor! Oh. Ladies and

gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure to

introduce that great inventor,

Thomas Albert... No! Alexander Gracie...

No! Wilbur and Arthur... No! Well,

then who?Clyde Crashcop!

Clyde Crash... Clyde Crashcop?

Leonardo, in this grim world of

ours, we take life too seriously.

We should devote more time to fun and

frolic. Today I am in a gay and

merry mood. Oh, oh, oh

But it's not right that I alone should

be so carefree and buoyant. I

wish to spread joy throughout the world.

I want everyone to be happy as

a... as

a... Lark?Very well,

Leonardo. Since I am in a good mood,

lark. That's la for la and ark

for ark, lark. Now I shall

invent a lark to spread

happiness.

Go, lark! Spread happiness!

All right, Leonardo. Just to humor you, I

will give him longer legs to speed him

on his way.

Go Lark, spread

happiness.

Lark is off on his merry mission.

I shut a lark into the air. It

fell to earth, I know not where. Umm

I send the lark into the air,

spreading joy and mirth to

everywhere.

Ah, Leonardo, the whole world will soon

be singing my praises.

Aha, some happy person has

already come to thank me.

What have we here, la for la arc for arc

lark?

Why it is a bundle of joy?

Be gone, take happiness to

others. This bundle of

joyI will call a

baby. Ohh Where did you come

from, baby dear?Out of nowhere into

here?Are

you unhappy, child?

Above all else, this innocent babe must

be made happy. Now, Leonardo, before I

can communicate with him and learn his

troubles, I must first establish a

common language. Goo,

goo, flug, zip, goop.

He

says he wants my nose. I will tell him

he has a nose of his own.

Goo, flub, baby, snozzle. Miggle,

snozzle. No, noHe understands

perfectly. It

appears that the next step will be

teaching the child obedience. Let

go, child. Child, let

go.

Perhaps child psychology is in order. I

will direct his attention to another

object. There you are, Leonardo.

Now the infant is happy, and I

have escaped further bodily harm.

No, baby. No more

fun.

The child is having what is

scientifically known as the tantrum.

That's tan for tan and trump for trump

tantrum. The cure is simple. I

merely ignore the baby and the tantrum

stops. There, just

as I predicted. Now there seems to be

something else he wants. Why,

the poor baby is hungry.

So I remove the forbidden fruit from the

little darling's mouth. Then, holding him

at a safe distance, I invent...

the high chair. Note that he is now

trapped and can eat only what is on his

prescribed diet.

No, noBad for baby.

Good for Uncle Clyde.

I will invent the proper diet for baby.

Let us try one spoonful, baby.

You want a whole bowl full?All

righty, but baby must make it all

gone. Not the psychology,

Leonardo. The baby will empty the

bowl.

So far, perfect.

Now, after eating, the baby obviously

needs a bath. Therefore, I will invent

what will be known as the, uh.. the, uh,

uh.. Oh,

Leonardo, what a silly word.

Bathinette. How

ridiculous. I will call it

the totty tub. That's a hyphenated

word, folks.

Come, baby, into the tatty-tub-tub you

go. Ohh

No more, Lark, for Lark, for

Ark, Lark, we have enough happiness here.

Take your joy to others less

fortunate. No, no, we're getting

much too happy here. Rose,

make your happiness to others, Lark.

All right, chipmunks. We're going to sing

for the people. So are youready to go?

Simon?I'm ready. Theodore?Sure.

Alvin?Alvin?

No, no, Alvin. This is Yankee Doodle, and

the words are, Yankee Doodle went to town

a-riding on his pony, stuck a feather in

his cap, and he called it macaroni.

Okay?Start.

Yankee Doodle, riding

a macaroni

Now wait a minute, Alvin. It's macaroni,

not spaghetti. I don't care if you

like spaghetti or not. In the song, the

word isMacaroni. Have you got

it?

Yeah, it was very good, fellas. Now you

kids at home, sing the song right along

with the orchestra. Come on now, don't be

bashful. Ready, set,

go!

handy Mind the music and the step

hand is goofy

handy

Ready for close-up Camera one, go

in Camera two, go in

Camera three,

The Alvin Show. The positive, the kernel

of The Alvin Show. There's games to

build, and one is more. Here's the

boy who giggles known as Theodore. Now

you see, on camera three, the

brother known as Simon on the family

tree. And here's the star of the show,

Alvin!

Alvin!

This yard is a disgrace.

Aren't those kids leaving rakes all over

the place?

Food all over the table. The refrigerator

door open.

No sense of responsibility. No respect

for anything. Theodore.

Simon.

Alvin.

Theodore. Simon.

Alvin.

Alvin?I just can't believe

it.

Isn't that cute?He left one little

sock out. Well, I'll just-- Alvin!

What those chipmunks need is discipline,

and I'm gonna-- Evening.

Oh, you're resting, are you?Dave, what

are you doing up in that

tree?Look, boys, I think we're going to

have to have a little talk. We live in

this place together, right?We all have a

responsibility, right?We all have to

do our part, right?Do you understand,

Simon?Right. Do you understand,

Theodore?Right. And how about you, Alvin?

Alvin,

Alvin! All right! Okay,

that does it. From now on, things are

gonna be different around here. You're

gonna put your shoulders to the wheel,

and I mean right now. Theodore, you

pick up all that junk that's laying

around. Simon, you start weeding the

garden. Alvin, you mow the lawn.

Hi, Dave.

A great star whites me, rockin' my

hand, straining my back, wearing

out my brain. I'll be getting old

before my time. Am I gonna allow

that?Absolutely not.

Now,What am I gonna do about it?

Well, let's see. Hey,

fellas, how would you like me to get you

out of all this work?Sure.

Yeah, Alvin, but how?Never mind

how, just leave it to Alvin.

Hello, evening courier, this

is Alvin. Well-known star of

television, radio, and recording. How

would you like a real scoop on

David Seville?Fine. Just get

over here right away. Here

you are.

Come on, fellas. Smear it on good.

Excuse me, is this the Seville residence?

Young man, could you stop mowing a moment?

Oh, I wouldn't dare. I received a

tip. There's some sort of a story on

David Seville. Oh, there is. You

could write a lot about him. He's so

good to us. Starting next week, we

only have to work 18 hours a

day. 18 hours?Oh, yes.

He lets us do all the work.

David says, Hard work builds character.

Oh, he does?Yes,

ma'am. Excuse me. Hey, fellas!

Have you finished washing the car yet?Not

yet!Well, hurry up.

Agents, we have their paintballs before

supper. Again!

Mr. Seville. Uh, yes?

I'm from the Evening Courier. Apparently,

there's quite a story here. There is?

Yes, and it's very interesting. It

is?Mr. Seville. Those are the famous

chipmunks, right?Well, yes, they--

And you insist that they do jobs like

mowing the lawn?Well, at times-- And

weeding the garden?Uh, yes. You mean you

make these stars do menial tasks such as

washing a car?Well, you-- And sawing wood?

You see-- I understand they even paint

the house. Mr. Seville, this is

unbelievable. I does not take

care of that. Congratulations. I

was raised on hard work and it never hurt

me. I think young ones should carry their

share of the household duties. Shoulder

to the wheel and all that. You do?No.

Let's get some more shots of them

working. This is the most refreshing

thing I've seen in ages. It certainly

is. Okay, fellas, back

to work. Mow that lawn, wash that

car, trim the hedge, weed the garden.

Come on now, on the double! Good show!

Yeah, Alvin, you'll fix it for us.

Big deal!

The great mind at work, the big thinker.

Bring it to Alvin! Sure, the big

man!

Alvin!

What are you writing?Nothing. Well, don't

just stand there. Write something. And

here's something you'll really enjoy.

Hey, Dave?Yes, Alvin?Where are

you, Dave?Right here, Alvin. Where?Over

here, hanging my latest mask.

How come you collect masks, Dave?Because

masks are like show business, Alvin.

Primitive people use masks in religious

and tribal ceremonies. Show business

grew out of these ceremonies. The first

Greek dramas used masks to show

despair, joy,

anger, and love. I thought

masks were for witch doctors. That's

right, Alvin. They do use masks.

That's an Iroquois Indian mask to drive

away evil spirits.

Here's one from Tibet. Was that for

evil spirits, too?That's right, Alvin.

The Yaki Indians use this one.

And this one's Peruvian. And...

What's the whispering for, Simon?Well, we

were thinking... I mean, yeah!

About witch doctors and...

Hey, babe, let's sing The Witch Doctor.

That's good, yeah. Oh, boy.

The Witch Doctor. I don't think so,

fellas. I made that record one. Yeah, but

not with us. Come on. All right, let's

try it. I told the witch doctor I was

in love with you I told the witch

doctor I was in love with you

And then the witch doctor he told me what

to do He said that-- .

Very good, boys. I told the witch doctor

you didn't love me true. I told the

witch doctor you didn't love me nice.

And then the witch doctor, he gave me

this advice. He said that...

Now you've been heaping love from me just

like you were a miser. And I'll admit I

wasn't very smart. So

I went out and found myself a guy that's

so much wiser. And he taught me the way

to win your heart. Win your

heart! My friend who wished after,

he taught me what to say. My friend who

wished after, he taught me what to do. I

know that you'll be

Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me

great pleasure... No,

Alvin, you're supposed to introduce the

great inventor. Oh. Ladies and

gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure

to introduce that great inventor,

Thomas Alva... No!

Alexander Gracie... No! Wilbur and

Arthur... No! Well then who?Clyde

Crashcop. Clyde

Crash... Clyde Crashcop.

Leonardo the Fly

Swatter.

Let that be a lesson to you. Now fetch me

one of the deceased flies.

HmmHmmLook in here, Leonardo.

What do you see?

A dead fly?

Leonardo, did you not observe the basic

construction of the fly wing?How do you

suppose flies fly?

That's right, Leonardo. The wing is the

thing. What is it the fly can

do that man can not do?

No, Leonardo. Walking on the

ceiling is not what I was referring to.

What I make reference to is

flight. That's fly for

fly and aight for aight, flight.

And I... Flight crash cup

shall bring flight to

mankind.

Man on the wing, if flies

can fly, then so can I. The

deft mind, the brilliant brain

overcomes all obstacles.

I shall fly.

Leonardo, for shame,

a safety net. Such

puny faith.

Behold, Leonardo, I take to the

wing. Flight is here.

Flight is real. Flight!

Leonardo, am I not smarter than a

fly or a bird?

Of course I am. My mind

is whirling with inventiveness. Whirling,

whirling, whirling.

Now, I shall invent the

whirling wing.

Witness Leonardo.

Off I go into the expansive glue

up yonder. Voila!

Now we're getting somewhere, Leonardo.

Help me out. We

shall try again. This time you will hold

my body so that the blade revolves.

Ready?Hold tight.

Leonardo,

Leonardo,

let's go!

Leonardo, why

did...

I am not unduly depressed, Leonardo.

I am sure the whirling blade is on the

right track. Come, all we

have to do now is add wings and power.

Therefore, I shall invent

power.

Observe, Leonardo. Stored energy.

The whirling blade for thrust and the

wings for lift. Ready

the cockpit, Leonardo. I shall mount to

the sky. Let the birds

look to their laurels.

Contact Leonardo.

Ready, Leonardo.

What a momentous occasion, Leonardo.

No doubt, this time, I know

I'm right. And right makes

flight, and mechanized flight will

conquer height. And back to the

drawing board, Leonardo.

umm Voila! All

right, Leonardo. This is

it. Make ready to cut me loose for the

first flight in heavier

than aircraft.

All right, Leonardo. Cut me

loose. Farewell,

Leonardo.

We have failed, Leonardo.

Failed miserably.

What is the answer, Leonardo?

Oh, what is the answer?

You are right, Leonardo. Very

logical. Ladies and

gentlemen, conclusion.

Fly is for the birds!

All right, you chipmunks, ready to sing

yourI'll say we are. Yeah, let's say it

now. Okay, Simon?Okay. Okay,

Theodore?Okay. Okay, Alvin?

Alvin?

Alvin! Okay! Christmas,

Christmas, time is near

Time for toys And time for cheer

We've been good But we can't

laugh Merry Christmas

Okay, fellas, get ready. That was very

good, Simon. Very good, Theodore.

Uh, Alvin, you were a little flat. Watch

it, uh, Alvin. Alvin.

Very good, boys. Yeah, let's--

No, that's enough. Let's not overdo

it. Oh, you may not overdo it if we

wanted to. Oh, wait a minute,

boys. Alvin, cut that ..

Wait! Just a minute. Simon, will you

cut

that out?Merry Christmas, everybody.

Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to

invent a brief word or two. It is not

often when I'm asked in reference to and

on the basis of--