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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,897 --> 00:00:02,857 Previously on "Resident Alien"... 2 00:00:02,862 --> 00:00:04,756 Hello, Harry. I'm Goliath. 3 00:00:04,761 --> 00:00:06,101 I needed to send you a message. 4 00:00:06,106 --> 00:00:08,210 Look, I need more information on this alien race 5 00:00:08,215 --> 00:00:10,260 that you said is trying to take over the Earth. 6 00:00:10,265 --> 00:00:13,593 Here I go again, dragging another guy into my mess. 7 00:00:13,703 --> 00:00:14,838 You still got it, Coach. 8 00:00:14,843 --> 00:00:16,643 You know, the Hardpack tournament's coming up. 9 00:00:16,648 --> 00:00:18,771 - It's my knee. - Ew! 10 00:00:18,776 --> 00:00:21,289 I've been training a lot. I think I overdid it. 11 00:00:21,752 --> 00:00:23,773 This package is from Violinda. 12 00:00:24,039 --> 00:00:25,385 Harry, look at this. 13 00:00:25,390 --> 00:00:26,946 It was just you and me there. No one else was there. 14 00:00:26,950 --> 00:00:28,393 This makes no sense... 15 00:00:28,398 --> 00:00:31,253 unless you're Goliath. 16 00:01:05,780 --> 00:01:08,237 I knew it. I knew it! 17 00:01:08,253 --> 00:01:10,214 Honey, no! Honey, stop! 18 00:01:13,410 --> 00:01:14,450 Relax. 19 00:01:14,455 --> 00:01:15,915 Hey. Hey! 20 00:01:15,920 --> 00:01:18,060 Honey, stop! Don't hurt him! 21 00:01:34,226 --> 00:01:37,226 22 00:01:37,698 --> 00:01:40,769 It was cold in the Ice-Wind Desert. 23 00:01:41,199 --> 00:01:44,355 But it was also lonely. 24 00:01:46,411 --> 00:01:49,527 I was left there to die. 25 00:01:50,753 --> 00:01:52,032 Alone. 26 00:01:54,074 --> 00:01:57,831 I did not care at the time, 27 00:01:58,264 --> 00:02:01,764 but thinking about it now... 28 00:02:03,888 --> 00:02:05,768 It was very painful. 29 00:02:08,289 --> 00:02:11,749 All my siblings had already died. 30 00:02:15,492 --> 00:02:18,332 I had killed them, of course. 31 00:02:19,687 --> 00:02:22,187 And how did that make you feel? 32 00:02:25,437 --> 00:02:27,789 Having an absent father? 33 00:02:27,794 --> 00:02:29,084 Mm. 34 00:02:29,089 --> 00:02:31,566 It makes me feel vulnerable. 35 00:02:31,945 --> 00:02:34,522 And how does that make you feel? 36 00:02:34,527 --> 00:02:37,157 _ 37 00:02:38,074 --> 00:02:39,494 Like you haven't been listening 38 00:02:39,499 --> 00:02:41,379 to a single word I've said. 39 00:02:41,409 --> 00:02:43,689 And how... 40 00:02:44,496 --> 00:02:48,086 I have been listening to several words. 41 00:02:48,290 --> 00:02:49,841 Good morning, sir. 42 00:02:49,919 --> 00:02:51,089 I got you a little something. 43 00:02:51,094 --> 00:02:53,184 Holy shit, a dinosaur egg! 44 00:02:53,477 --> 00:02:54,768 What? 45 00:02:54,845 --> 00:02:57,595 Oh, I'm sorry, Deputy. I got too excited. 46 00:02:57,600 --> 00:02:59,060 Now, if it's not a dinosaur egg, 47 00:02:59,078 --> 00:03:00,242 you're gonna think I don't like it, 48 00:03:00,246 --> 00:03:02,141 but I'ma keep an open mind, okay? 49 00:03:03,899 --> 00:03:06,979 Aw, a Patience snow globe. 50 00:03:06,984 --> 00:03:08,074 Thank you, Deputy. 51 00:03:08,079 --> 00:03:10,419 You got a little, mini town hall here. 52 00:03:10,424 --> 00:03:12,344 Look at that... a little, mini phone booth. 53 00:03:12,484 --> 00:03:14,654 I wonder who's in this car? 54 00:03:14,851 --> 00:03:18,345 Maybe it's Detective Lena Torres coming to visit. 55 00:03:18,767 --> 00:03:21,259 Okay, all right, I see what this is. 56 00:03:21,316 --> 00:03:24,106 Patience snow globe, matchmaking... 57 00:03:24,369 --> 00:03:25,699 You're trying to get me to stay. 58 00:03:25,704 --> 00:03:27,304 Now, see, I would think if anybody was happy 59 00:03:27,308 --> 00:03:29,222 about me moving, it'd be you, 60 00:03:29,227 --> 00:03:30,473 because then if I moved, 61 00:03:30,478 --> 00:03:33,040 then, you know, maybe you could be sheriff someday. 62 00:03:34,011 --> 00:03:35,511 Me? 63 00:03:35,562 --> 00:03:39,142 A sheriff... really? 64 00:03:39,147 --> 00:03:40,392 Although I can't help but notice 65 00:03:40,396 --> 00:03:42,265 that UFO book on your desk. 66 00:03:42,270 --> 00:03:44,518 You're gonna have to get rid of some of these silly hobbies 67 00:03:44,522 --> 00:03:46,572 if you want to be taken seriously enough 68 00:03:46,577 --> 00:03:48,626 to run this department. 69 00:03:49,604 --> 00:03:51,524 UFOs aren't a hobby 70 00:03:51,529 --> 00:03:54,832 as much as they are objects in the sky. 71 00:03:54,837 --> 00:03:56,155 No, I get it. We all got our fantasies. 72 00:03:56,159 --> 00:03:57,739 I mean, hell, in another life, 73 00:03:57,744 --> 00:03:59,616 I could have been one of those Renaissance Faire guys, right? 74 00:03:59,620 --> 00:04:00,868 But I can't be pulling people over 75 00:04:00,872 --> 00:04:02,926 wearing no suit of armor on no horse. 76 00:04:02,931 --> 00:04:04,371 And I damn sure can't write them no ticket 77 00:04:04,375 --> 00:04:05,995 with no jousting stick or turkey leg 78 00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:07,751 and a jug of mead in my hand. 79 00:04:07,756 --> 00:04:10,199 Well, it's hard to argue with that logic. 80 00:04:22,017 --> 00:04:24,554 Doing a good job keeping up for somebody who doesn't train. 81 00:04:24,943 --> 00:04:26,310 It's the only way I could spend time with you 82 00:04:26,314 --> 00:04:27,843 these days. 83 00:04:28,474 --> 00:04:31,314 I'll let you off easy. We can walk a little bit here. 84 00:04:31,319 --> 00:04:33,358 Let me off easy? 85 00:04:33,411 --> 00:04:35,054 You're the one who's limping. 86 00:04:35,444 --> 00:04:37,904 I went pretty hard at the gym earlier today. 87 00:04:38,179 --> 00:04:40,539 Maybe you remember. Oh, that's right. 88 00:04:40,612 --> 00:04:42,304 You were still sleeping. 89 00:04:42,963 --> 00:04:45,119 Well, maybe you should go a little less hard. 90 00:04:45,210 --> 00:04:47,044 You know, your body speaks to you. 91 00:04:47,286 --> 00:04:48,533 It knows what it can handle. 92 00:04:48,538 --> 00:04:50,541 My body. 93 00:04:50,546 --> 00:04:53,127 Okay, let's just keep things light. 94 00:04:55,103 --> 00:04:56,103 Sorry. 95 00:04:56,108 --> 00:04:58,553 Sorry, I just got to push to get ready for the tournament. 96 00:04:58,733 --> 00:05:00,466 It's stressing me out. 97 00:05:00,551 --> 00:05:01,761 It's kind of my one shot 98 00:05:01,766 --> 00:05:03,976 to prove I can still kick ass, you know? 99 00:05:04,018 --> 00:05:05,388 You're gonna kill it. 100 00:05:05,436 --> 00:05:06,600 I just don't want you to get hurt 101 00:05:06,604 --> 00:05:08,181 because you pushed it too far. 102 00:05:08,186 --> 00:05:09,486 I have to push. 103 00:05:09,491 --> 00:05:12,897 If I'm gonna make it through the qualifiers, I... 104 00:05:13,818 --> 00:05:15,608 It's just my knee is compensating 105 00:05:15,613 --> 00:05:17,416 for my old ankle injury, all right? 106 00:05:17,421 --> 00:05:19,159 It's not a big deal. 107 00:05:19,176 --> 00:05:20,577 Well, let's put some snow on it. 108 00:05:20,582 --> 00:05:21,698 We'll get the swelling down. 109 00:05:21,702 --> 00:05:23,752 Oh, yeah, good idea. 110 00:05:23,897 --> 00:05:26,578 Like, just stop parenting me. 111 00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:28,827 Wow, D'arcy. 112 00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:36,796 I'm... I'm sorry, Elliot. 113 00:05:37,105 --> 00:05:38,105 I'm sorry. 114 00:05:38,110 --> 00:05:40,445 Just, let's... Let's keep running. 115 00:05:40,450 --> 00:05:41,790 I think I need to go home. 116 00:05:43,650 --> 00:05:45,410 I'll see you later. 117 00:06:09,959 --> 00:06:11,289 Hey. 118 00:06:11,294 --> 00:06:12,960 Ben Hawthorne says he doesn't want 119 00:06:12,965 --> 00:06:14,513 to pay for therapy this morning. 120 00:06:14,518 --> 00:06:16,470 Apparently, you weren't listening to him? 121 00:06:16,475 --> 00:06:18,151 I wasn't. He is boring. 122 00:06:18,395 --> 00:06:21,966 Look, I don't blame you for being distracted. 123 00:06:21,971 --> 00:06:25,971 You know, you just found out you were this Goliath guy, 124 00:06:25,976 --> 00:06:28,556 which also makes you father to an alien baby 125 00:06:28,561 --> 00:06:30,811 that was kidnapped, which is kind of a lot. 126 00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:34,770 I'm only distracted because the alien baby was taken away 127 00:06:34,775 --> 00:06:36,022 before he could tell me 128 00:06:36,027 --> 00:06:39,067 which alien race is taking over the Earth. 129 00:06:39,354 --> 00:06:43,863 I do not care about this father-baby stuff. 130 00:06:43,875 --> 00:06:46,835 Harry, it's human nature to care about your offspring. 131 00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:49,640 It is human nature, not alien nature. 132 00:06:49,852 --> 00:06:52,204 We do not care if our children die, 133 00:06:52,209 --> 00:06:54,669 as long as they die in a ditch 134 00:06:54,674 --> 00:06:56,094 and not in the road 135 00:06:56,099 --> 00:06:59,939 where they will make it bumpy for our vehicles. 136 00:07:00,088 --> 00:07:01,088 Selfish children. 137 00:07:01,100 --> 00:07:04,060 Okay, look, I'm still confused. 138 00:07:04,065 --> 00:07:08,275 The future you sent the past you a message, but how? 139 00:07:08,486 --> 00:07:10,318 Do you have a time machine? 140 00:07:10,573 --> 00:07:13,138 Wait. Can we go back in time? 141 00:07:14,268 --> 00:07:16,726 There is no such thing as a time machine. 142 00:07:17,265 --> 00:07:19,690 The only effective way to travel through time 143 00:07:19,695 --> 00:07:22,502 is through... is through... 144 00:07:23,237 --> 00:07:25,237 There is no word for it. 145 00:07:25,242 --> 00:07:26,582 Uh... 146 00:07:31,999 --> 00:07:34,169 In English, 147 00:07:34,246 --> 00:07:38,852 a portal, I guess, is the closest thing you could say. 148 00:07:39,629 --> 00:07:41,379 But you would not understand it. 149 00:07:41,384 --> 00:07:44,344 Try me. Portals. Go on. 150 00:07:44,665 --> 00:07:48,057 A portal is a split 151 00:07:48,106 --> 00:07:50,547 in the fabric of time. 152 00:07:51,102 --> 00:07:52,352 Okay. 153 00:07:52,395 --> 00:07:54,446 Uh, well, 154 00:07:55,356 --> 00:07:57,356 the fabric of time, 155 00:07:57,424 --> 00:08:00,097 and it is like a... 156 00:08:00,102 --> 00:08:03,183 Sort of like a poly-wool blend. 157 00:08:03,195 --> 00:08:08,376 As the accelerating atoms speed up, 158 00:08:08,381 --> 00:08:13,995 it causes the fabric to peel sort of nubbins because... 159 00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:15,813 Harry, you don't know what you're talking about, do you? 160 00:08:15,817 --> 00:08:17,027 No, I don't. 161 00:08:17,032 --> 00:08:18,924 My people have never figured it out. 162 00:08:19,219 --> 00:08:21,419 I guess I went through an existing portal 163 00:08:21,424 --> 00:08:23,985 left by another alien race. 164 00:08:24,268 --> 00:08:25,602 What? 165 00:08:26,837 --> 00:08:30,547 There are only two alien species that use portals. 166 00:08:31,142 --> 00:08:33,008 The Greys. 167 00:08:33,644 --> 00:08:36,364 But it is not them. 168 00:08:36,397 --> 00:08:38,767 They have no use for humans, 169 00:08:38,816 --> 00:08:42,558 except to probe their elimination holes. 170 00:08:42,563 --> 00:08:44,150 But there is one more. 171 00:08:44,155 --> 00:08:45,415 Who? 172 00:08:45,491 --> 00:08:47,361 Alpha Draconians. 173 00:08:48,613 --> 00:08:50,823 They use portals. 174 00:08:50,868 --> 00:08:52,408 Are they dangerous? 175 00:08:52,413 --> 00:08:53,913 Not the same way as Greys are, 176 00:08:53,918 --> 00:08:56,915 but they are good at disguising themselves. 177 00:08:56,920 --> 00:08:58,840 They can look human. 178 00:09:01,172 --> 00:09:02,552 God! 179 00:09:02,626 --> 00:09:04,193 What the hell? 180 00:09:04,198 --> 00:09:05,255 Were you just picking my nose? 181 00:09:05,259 --> 00:09:09,639 Alpha Draconians, their nostrils are pleasure zones, 182 00:09:09,785 --> 00:09:12,344 so if you were an Alpha Draconian, 183 00:09:12,349 --> 00:09:16,057 then you would've liked that! 184 00:09:16,062 --> 00:09:17,684 Well, I didn't like it, and if you do it again, 185 00:09:17,688 --> 00:09:19,329 I will break your finger. 186 00:09:19,769 --> 00:09:22,772 Obviously, you are human, so you passed! 187 00:09:29,358 --> 00:09:31,705 - Hey, honey. - Hey. 188 00:09:33,404 --> 00:09:35,494 Missed you this morning with your early therapy, 189 00:09:35,499 --> 00:09:37,842 so I brought you a juice box... 190 00:09:37,847 --> 00:09:39,372 - Ah! - And a sandwich. 191 00:09:39,377 --> 00:09:42,103 Thank you. I am dying of thirst. 192 00:09:43,543 --> 00:09:46,158 - Throw it out. - Oh. 193 00:09:46,267 --> 00:09:48,507 Oh, hey, you know how we've been 194 00:09:48,512 --> 00:09:50,356 so excited about the resort moving in? 195 00:09:50,361 --> 00:09:52,036 - Uh-huh. - Well, now I'm thinking 196 00:09:52,041 --> 00:09:53,951 maybe it's not such a great idea after all. 197 00:09:53,956 --> 00:09:55,366 What? Why not? 198 00:09:55,507 --> 00:09:57,805 I just think Patience is really great the way it is. 199 00:09:57,810 --> 00:09:59,509 Maybe a resort would change it too much. 200 00:09:59,514 --> 00:10:01,394 Wow, look at you. 201 00:10:01,399 --> 00:10:02,985 "Pretty great the way it is"? 202 00:10:02,990 --> 00:10:04,524 I never thought you'd say that about Patience. 203 00:10:04,528 --> 00:10:06,454 I know. I guess I'm a convert. 204 00:10:06,459 --> 00:10:08,162 - Hmm. - Okay, I'm headed to the gym. 205 00:10:08,167 --> 00:10:09,245 Love you. 206 00:10:09,422 --> 00:10:11,029 Love you too. 207 00:10:11,583 --> 00:10:13,373 We're still doing the resort, though. 208 00:10:15,159 --> 00:10:17,869 - What? - The resort. 209 00:10:17,874 --> 00:10:19,384 You know, I, uh... 210 00:10:19,458 --> 00:10:21,264 I think it's good for the town. 211 00:10:21,790 --> 00:10:23,250 Yeah, yeah. 212 00:10:23,255 --> 00:10:25,015 No, I know, but you know, 213 00:10:25,048 --> 00:10:27,589 I don't think we should support it, so... 214 00:10:27,594 --> 00:10:29,604 Yeah, I think we should. 215 00:10:30,929 --> 00:10:32,326 Ah. 216 00:10:32,772 --> 00:10:34,873 Okay. 217 00:10:34,998 --> 00:10:36,726 I see what you're doing. 218 00:10:37,084 --> 00:10:38,682 After your presentation, I told you 219 00:10:38,687 --> 00:10:40,804 to stick by your guns no matter who is against you. 220 00:10:40,809 --> 00:10:42,269 - Mm-hmm. - That's... I get it. 221 00:10:42,274 --> 00:10:43,876 You're doing great. It's great. 222 00:10:43,881 --> 00:10:47,243 But it's me, you know, so it's different. 223 00:10:47,316 --> 00:10:49,396 Mm, how? 224 00:10:50,137 --> 00:10:52,802 Because I'm not for it anymore. 225 00:10:53,006 --> 00:10:54,872 Oh, I see. 226 00:10:56,796 --> 00:10:58,592 But I am. 227 00:11:01,810 --> 00:11:03,274 Yeah. 228 00:11:04,705 --> 00:11:05,764 So... 229 00:11:07,164 --> 00:11:09,254 Well, I guess we'll just have to agree to disagree. 230 00:11:09,259 --> 00:11:10,469 I agree. 231 00:11:12,137 --> 00:11:13,399 That's great. 232 00:11:15,348 --> 00:11:16,428 Ah. 233 00:11:16,433 --> 00:11:17,804 - Okay. - Okay. 234 00:11:17,809 --> 00:11:19,269 All right. 235 00:11:19,311 --> 00:11:21,076 - Love you. - Love you. 236 00:11:23,023 --> 00:11:25,023 - Okay. - All right. 237 00:11:32,276 --> 00:11:33,486 - Ow, ow, ow. - Oh, my God. 238 00:11:33,491 --> 00:11:34,781 What happened, Jujube? 239 00:11:34,928 --> 00:11:36,626 Oh, I had to give Kevin a bath. 240 00:11:36,631 --> 00:11:38,284 He got the squirts from an egg roll 241 00:11:38,289 --> 00:11:40,141 he found under the couch. 242 00:11:40,146 --> 00:11:41,328 I need more thread. 243 00:11:41,333 --> 00:11:43,524 I only got enough for "attacked by a cat," 244 00:11:43,529 --> 00:11:46,251 not for "bathes a cat." 245 00:11:46,491 --> 00:11:47,821 Don't move. 246 00:11:47,826 --> 00:11:50,290 Don't cats usually lick themselves clean? 247 00:11:50,295 --> 00:11:54,051 Yeah, but Kevin hates the taste of Oil of Olay. 248 00:11:56,578 --> 00:11:58,118 Hey, oh, while you're up, 249 00:11:58,123 --> 00:12:00,444 I need a refill on these pain meds. 250 00:12:00,528 --> 00:12:02,087 Are you serious, dude? 251 00:12:02,092 --> 00:12:03,351 That was a one-month supply. 252 00:12:03,356 --> 00:12:05,106 You should have plenty left. 253 00:12:05,181 --> 00:12:07,146 Well, if you're saying they should make the tiny writing 254 00:12:07,150 --> 00:12:09,548 on the side larger so I can read the amounts, 255 00:12:09,553 --> 00:12:11,006 I agree with you. 256 00:12:11,397 --> 00:12:13,407 What am I, a bird of prey? 257 00:12:13,412 --> 00:12:14,992 - Hey, D'arce. - Oh, what's up? 258 00:12:14,997 --> 00:12:16,680 - What are you doing here? - Oh, nothing. 259 00:12:16,685 --> 00:12:18,164 Just coming to see you. 260 00:12:18,202 --> 00:12:20,368 Want to make sure you're coming to my qualifiers tomorrow. 261 00:12:20,372 --> 00:12:21,832 - Oh. - Yup! 262 00:12:22,030 --> 00:12:23,516 Talking to Asta. 263 00:12:23,521 --> 00:12:24,862 Oh, tell her I said hi! 264 00:12:24,867 --> 00:12:27,459 I can hear you, Judy. Hi. 265 00:12:27,617 --> 00:12:28,873 That was fast. 266 00:12:29,248 --> 00:12:30,822 She doesn't really care. You know that, right? 267 00:12:30,826 --> 00:12:33,088 Anyway, I invited my parents. 268 00:12:33,093 --> 00:12:35,553 They'd love to see you, make you feel worthless. 269 00:12:35,558 --> 00:12:38,093 Oh, of course. I wouldn't miss it. 270 00:12:38,098 --> 00:12:39,698 Ooh, I could dig out your Team D'arcy hat 271 00:12:39,703 --> 00:12:41,304 that I made for your Olympic trials. 272 00:12:41,309 --> 00:12:43,165 How do you still have that? 273 00:12:43,170 --> 00:12:45,399 Ooh, Harry Vanderspeigle. 274 00:12:45,404 --> 00:12:48,587 Buddy, you want to come to my event tomorrow? 275 00:12:48,592 --> 00:12:51,693 Trying to pack the stands with my biggest fans. 276 00:12:51,780 --> 00:12:53,900 Then I will not come because I am not your fan. 277 00:12:53,905 --> 00:12:57,576 She is being oddly friendly, so be polite. 278 00:12:57,670 --> 00:12:59,454 Please, thank you. 279 00:12:59,523 --> 00:13:01,283 I am not your fan. 280 00:13:01,324 --> 00:13:02,534 - You're welcome. - Okay. 281 00:13:02,539 --> 00:13:04,119 Well, I guess you don't want to eat 282 00:13:04,124 --> 00:13:06,350 the best churros in Colorado. 283 00:13:07,592 --> 00:13:10,180 I am a fan of churros. 284 00:13:10,185 --> 00:13:11,709 Good. Come on, we'll road trip. 285 00:13:11,714 --> 00:13:13,399 You can get your mind off things... 286 00:13:13,404 --> 00:13:15,301 If there's anything your mind is on. 287 00:13:15,380 --> 00:13:17,090 I will go, and you will buy me 288 00:13:17,095 --> 00:13:20,605 hot grease-fried sugar sticks that are shaped like okra. 289 00:13:22,295 --> 00:13:23,596 Yay! 290 00:13:23,875 --> 00:13:25,045 - Great. - Okay. 291 00:13:25,050 --> 00:13:26,680 - See you tomorrow. - Okay. 292 00:13:26,685 --> 00:13:28,548 Team D'arcy! 293 00:13:28,553 --> 00:13:29,982 Team D'arcy! 294 00:13:30,644 --> 00:13:32,314 I was in it. Three of us. 295 00:13:38,867 --> 00:13:40,737 Hey. 296 00:13:40,825 --> 00:13:42,963 So psyched you're coming tomorrow. 297 00:13:42,968 --> 00:13:44,580 Yay, friends. 298 00:13:44,654 --> 00:13:47,454 Say, offhand... I was just thinking this now... 299 00:13:47,747 --> 00:13:50,713 What if you brought your doctor bag thingy with you tomorrow, 300 00:13:50,718 --> 00:13:52,268 in case I need, like, I don't know, 301 00:13:52,273 --> 00:13:54,757 a cortisone shot before the race? 302 00:13:55,123 --> 00:13:58,423 Also, I need you to refill this prescription for me. 303 00:13:58,428 --> 00:14:00,697 I dropped a bunch down the drain. 304 00:14:00,702 --> 00:14:01,987 Such a klutz. 305 00:14:01,992 --> 00:14:05,766 If you are such a klutz, 306 00:14:05,844 --> 00:14:07,474 then maybe you should not be competing 307 00:14:07,479 --> 00:14:09,835 in major sporting events. 308 00:14:10,386 --> 00:14:12,224 Then you would not need any pain pills. 309 00:14:12,229 --> 00:14:13,229 You should be careful. 310 00:14:13,234 --> 00:14:16,577 These can be very addictive. 311 00:14:18,522 --> 00:14:20,612 Well, you make a good point. 312 00:14:20,617 --> 00:14:22,457 We should probably all just stay home tomorrow, 313 00:14:22,462 --> 00:14:24,394 and then nobody gets any churros. 314 00:14:24,399 --> 00:14:25,649 No! 315 00:14:27,283 --> 00:14:28,453 I need the churros. 316 00:14:28,458 --> 00:14:30,398 I need the pills. 317 00:14:45,284 --> 00:14:47,558 Oh, yes. 318 00:14:58,854 --> 00:15:00,417 _ 319 00:15:20,490 --> 00:15:21,988 _ 320 00:15:30,530 --> 00:15:32,654 You knew where my mother was? 321 00:15:33,267 --> 00:15:34,500 What? 322 00:15:34,505 --> 00:15:35,693 When I was in the third grade, 323 00:15:35,697 --> 00:15:38,412 you knew where she was, and you never told me? 324 00:15:38,601 --> 00:15:40,942 The address was old, even then. 325 00:15:41,226 --> 00:15:42,516 She doesn't live there. 326 00:15:42,521 --> 00:15:44,532 But it's an address. 327 00:15:44,618 --> 00:15:45,738 It's a piece of her. 328 00:15:45,743 --> 00:15:48,043 It doesn't matter how small it is. 329 00:15:48,605 --> 00:15:50,076 Maybe if I would have found her, 330 00:15:50,081 --> 00:15:52,849 and maybe... maybe she would have wanted me. 331 00:15:52,963 --> 00:15:54,673 I'm sorry. 332 00:15:55,826 --> 00:15:57,956 I didn't want to get your hopes up. 333 00:15:58,089 --> 00:15:59,879 I know. 334 00:16:12,495 --> 00:16:15,049 Do I finally get to meet Elliot or what? 335 00:16:15,307 --> 00:16:17,115 He's coming today, right? 336 00:16:17,120 --> 00:16:19,613 Uh, probably not. 337 00:16:19,985 --> 00:16:21,365 Are we there yet? 338 00:16:21,370 --> 00:16:23,241 Harry, we told you the last time that you asked, 339 00:16:23,245 --> 00:16:25,835 we will tell you as soon as we're getting close. 340 00:16:26,097 --> 00:16:28,386 Wait, he's not coming to cheer you on? 341 00:16:28,836 --> 00:16:30,533 What? He knows about it, right? 342 00:16:30,538 --> 00:16:31,998 Yeah, he knows. 343 00:16:32,003 --> 00:16:33,709 I've been training my ass off. 344 00:16:33,714 --> 00:16:36,467 I just don't think he's really in the cheering-on mood. 345 00:16:36,472 --> 00:16:39,521 I sort of pushed him away the other day, 346 00:16:39,526 --> 00:16:42,224 and he's probably already swiping right 347 00:16:42,229 --> 00:16:43,968 on some dental hygienist from Denver 348 00:16:43,973 --> 00:16:45,979 with health insurance and a three-year plan. 349 00:16:46,157 --> 00:16:47,634 That's a lot to unpack there. 350 00:16:47,639 --> 00:16:49,940 Did you bring snacks? 351 00:16:50,502 --> 00:16:52,323 Yep. 352 00:16:52,477 --> 00:16:54,682 - Okay. - Cereal. 353 00:16:55,074 --> 00:16:58,878 Anyway, we know you do this, but... 354 00:16:59,322 --> 00:17:00,522 I really felt like 355 00:17:00,527 --> 00:17:03,170 maybe Elliot was worth breaking your pattern. 356 00:17:03,175 --> 00:17:04,651 I have to urinate. 357 00:17:04,695 --> 00:17:05,985 I need to urinate. 358 00:17:05,990 --> 00:17:07,279 Why do you sound like C-3PO? 359 00:17:07,283 --> 00:17:08,365 Just say you have to pee. 360 00:17:08,370 --> 00:17:11,310 - I have to pee-3PO. - Wow. 361 00:17:11,315 --> 00:17:13,047 - Ooh, that was good. - All right. 362 00:17:13,052 --> 00:17:14,342 You gotta whiz. We got it. 363 00:17:14,347 --> 00:17:16,083 - Go number one. - Yeah, drain the lizard. 364 00:17:16,088 --> 00:17:18,331 - Free to pee? You and me. - Tinkle. 365 00:17:18,336 --> 00:17:19,677 Make water. 366 00:17:19,682 --> 00:17:22,167 Make water? That's so gross! 367 00:17:22,246 --> 00:17:23,836 Yes, all of those things! 368 00:17:23,841 --> 00:17:26,128 Okay, well, you just have to hold it, all right? 369 00:17:26,133 --> 00:17:27,427 The adults are talking. 370 00:17:27,432 --> 00:17:29,427 Can't you just play "I Spy" or something? 371 00:17:29,432 --> 00:17:31,568 - Ooh, yes. - What is "I Spy"? 372 00:17:31,573 --> 00:17:33,013 You pick something you see, and then you say, 373 00:17:33,017 --> 00:17:35,597 "I spy with my little eye something," 374 00:17:35,602 --> 00:17:38,003 and then we all have to guess what it is. 375 00:17:38,008 --> 00:17:39,232 Go for it. 376 00:17:41,732 --> 00:17:43,982 - _ - I spy with my little eye 377 00:17:43,987 --> 00:17:46,901 a way to contact the Alpha Draconians. 378 00:17:47,738 --> 00:17:49,028 Pull the car over right now, 379 00:17:49,033 --> 00:17:51,443 or I will make water on the floor! 380 00:17:51,448 --> 00:17:53,328 - Okay! - Jesus. 381 00:17:53,778 --> 00:17:55,948 _ 382 00:18:06,182 --> 00:18:08,923 Why is he going so far away from the car? 383 00:18:09,242 --> 00:18:10,242 Well, if his weenis 384 00:18:10,247 --> 00:18:11,924 is anything like his back-seat attitude, 385 00:18:11,929 --> 00:18:14,679 he's probably self-conscious about its childlike appearance. 386 00:18:17,424 --> 00:18:19,684 Oh, hey! 387 00:18:19,724 --> 00:18:21,394 Oh, my God. 388 00:18:21,399 --> 00:18:24,297 You found it. Incredible. 389 00:18:24,302 --> 00:18:27,817 But not as incredible as this other thing I found. 390 00:18:32,367 --> 00:18:34,407 Who's Mary-Ellen Taylor? 391 00:18:34,450 --> 00:18:37,396 Mary-Ellen, my mom. 392 00:18:37,763 --> 00:18:39,357 Oh, my God. 393 00:18:40,409 --> 00:18:41,539 Where was this? 394 00:18:41,544 --> 00:18:44,707 I found it under a box in Dan's closet. 395 00:18:44,800 --> 00:18:47,170 This is in Taos. This is super close to here. 396 00:18:47,175 --> 00:18:49,395 Yeah, but she doesn't live there anymore. 397 00:18:49,587 --> 00:18:53,092 But maybe somebody does who knows something about her. 398 00:18:53,097 --> 00:18:54,717 You should go. 399 00:18:54,766 --> 00:18:56,614 I don't know. 400 00:18:56,900 --> 00:19:00,343 I mean, I... I guess it's possible. 401 00:19:00,887 --> 00:19:02,143 Wouldn't that be so amazing 402 00:19:02,148 --> 00:19:05,015 if I could find out more about my mom after all this time? 403 00:19:05,808 --> 00:19:07,690 Like, even if it's just like, 404 00:19:07,695 --> 00:19:10,945 "Yeah, she once sat under that tree." 405 00:19:10,950 --> 00:19:13,200 I mean, amazing. Any tree. 406 00:19:13,718 --> 00:19:16,656 She was probably a lot like me, right? 407 00:19:17,526 --> 00:19:18,526 Maybe? 408 00:19:18,531 --> 00:19:21,042 Young, in a difficult relationship. 409 00:19:21,054 --> 00:19:24,070 I mean, maybe she had no choice but to give me up, right? 410 00:19:24,666 --> 00:19:26,626 Maybe she was protecting me. 411 00:19:28,132 --> 00:19:31,432 If she's really like me, she's regretted it ever since. 412 00:19:37,011 --> 00:19:38,721 How many numbers is he going? 413 00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:02,453 ♪ You gotta be cool ♪ 414 00:20:02,458 --> 00:20:03,668 ♪ You gotta be calm ♪ 415 00:20:03,673 --> 00:20:05,998 ♪ You gotta stay together ♪ 416 00:20:06,003 --> 00:20:07,750 ♪ All I know, all I know ♪ 417 00:20:07,755 --> 00:20:10,383 ♪ Love will save the day ♪ 418 00:20:10,388 --> 00:20:12,547 ♪ Herald what your mother said ♪ 419 00:20:12,552 --> 00:20:14,781 ♪ Read the books your father read ♪ 420 00:20:14,786 --> 00:20:17,772 ♪ Try to solve the puzzles in your own sweet... ♪ 421 00:20:17,777 --> 00:20:18,886 What song are we singing? 422 00:20:18,891 --> 00:20:20,055 What the hell happened to you? 423 00:20:20,059 --> 00:20:22,225 And why are you all grassy and sweaty? 424 00:20:22,528 --> 00:20:24,448 I was peeing... 425 00:20:24,453 --> 00:20:27,740 and I fell down in the grass. 426 00:20:27,969 --> 00:20:29,100 But not in the pee grass! 427 00:20:29,105 --> 00:20:30,251 In the dry grass. 428 00:20:30,256 --> 00:20:33,087 - And then, I exercised. - Ugh. 429 00:20:33,092 --> 00:20:34,784 Oh, all right. 430 00:20:34,789 --> 00:20:36,287 Well, I hope you didn't pee on yourself. 431 00:20:36,291 --> 00:20:39,282 I'm so sick of cleaning pee out of that back seat. 432 00:20:39,287 --> 00:20:40,828 - I don't want to do it again. - Again? 433 00:20:40,833 --> 00:20:42,094 I don't want to talk about it. 434 00:20:46,122 --> 00:20:49,542 Humans do not realize what crop circles really are... 435 00:20:49,547 --> 00:20:51,417 Alien emojis. 436 00:20:51,763 --> 00:20:53,004 The complex circle on the right 437 00:20:53,009 --> 00:20:54,969 stands for my middle finger. 438 00:20:58,910 --> 00:21:02,406 Welcome to the Hardpack qualifying rounds! 439 00:21:15,629 --> 00:21:17,129 Taking her practice run right now 440 00:21:17,141 --> 00:21:20,109 is World Cup champion D'arcy Bloom. 441 00:21:20,468 --> 00:21:22,468 Yeah! Way to go, D'arcy! 442 00:21:25,438 --> 00:21:26,847 Whoo-hoo! 443 00:21:26,852 --> 00:21:29,442 Yeah, D'arcy! Go, baby! 444 00:21:29,875 --> 00:21:32,019 Yeah, you're a baby! 445 00:21:32,024 --> 00:21:33,370 You have to go! 446 00:21:33,375 --> 00:21:35,145 Wow. 447 00:21:35,150 --> 00:21:36,280 Aah! 448 00:21:36,398 --> 00:21:37,608 Whoo! 449 00:21:37,613 --> 00:21:39,862 Are you kidding me? You're amazing! 450 00:21:39,867 --> 00:21:42,307 Oh, I feel great. 451 00:21:42,312 --> 00:21:43,872 You guys must be bringing me good luck. 452 00:21:43,946 --> 00:21:45,366 Oh, your parents aren't here yet. 453 00:21:45,593 --> 00:21:47,161 Oh, they never come for warm-ups. 454 00:21:47,242 --> 00:21:48,437 They'll be here later. 455 00:21:48,739 --> 00:21:50,371 Hey, could you go grab me a churro? 456 00:21:50,376 --> 00:21:51,979 I'm at your service, my lady. 457 00:21:51,984 --> 00:21:54,000 I'm like your pit crew today. 458 00:21:54,005 --> 00:21:56,062 One churro coming up. 459 00:21:56,791 --> 00:21:58,601 Get me one! 460 00:21:59,463 --> 00:22:01,173 Hey, buddy, I need you 461 00:22:01,178 --> 00:22:02,963 to hook me up with a cortisone shot, okay? 462 00:22:02,968 --> 00:22:05,021 My knee is killing me. 463 00:22:05,140 --> 00:22:07,185 I should not give this to you. 464 00:22:07,269 --> 00:22:08,389 The Internet says 465 00:22:08,394 --> 00:22:10,944 the shot prohibits inflammatory response 466 00:22:10,949 --> 00:22:13,619 but can mask further damage and re-injury, 467 00:22:13,691 --> 00:22:16,773 resulting in permanent damage. 468 00:22:17,818 --> 00:22:19,831 - Oh, it does. - Mm-hmm. 469 00:22:19,836 --> 00:22:22,367 But it also says that D'arcy smashing you in the face 470 00:22:22,372 --> 00:22:25,929 with her skis could cause permanent damage, so... 471 00:22:26,194 --> 00:22:27,324 Give me the shot. 472 00:22:29,462 --> 00:22:33,382 You would make a good opponent on the battlefield. 473 00:22:34,044 --> 00:22:36,424 - You look like a biter. - Mm-mm. 474 00:22:36,648 --> 00:22:38,634 I'm a hair puller. 475 00:22:44,241 --> 00:22:46,451 It also causes mood swings. 476 00:22:46,644 --> 00:22:49,564 Maybe you will swing back to being nice. 477 00:22:50,795 --> 00:22:51,875 Ah, ow. 478 00:22:51,880 --> 00:22:53,170 D'arce? 479 00:22:53,175 --> 00:22:55,095 Where are you guys? D'arce? 480 00:22:57,205 --> 00:22:58,856 - Oh, D'arce. - Hey. 481 00:22:58,861 --> 00:22:59,951 - Hey. - Oh. 482 00:22:59,956 --> 00:23:01,108 - Where were you? - Oh. 483 00:23:01,113 --> 00:23:02,913 I was just showing Harry around. 484 00:23:03,301 --> 00:23:05,112 I'm very interested in sports. 485 00:23:05,117 --> 00:23:07,237 Uh, go, team. 486 00:23:07,286 --> 00:23:08,497 High-fives! 487 00:23:08,502 --> 00:23:10,830 Keep your eyes on your balls. 488 00:23:11,380 --> 00:23:12,505 Okay. 489 00:23:12,510 --> 00:23:14,996 Oh, you have plenty of time before first round. 490 00:23:15,001 --> 00:23:16,864 You should go grab a cider or something. 491 00:23:16,869 --> 00:23:18,292 Oh, are you sure? 492 00:23:18,297 --> 00:23:19,457 Yeah, go for it. 493 00:23:19,507 --> 00:23:22,507 Okay. Pit crew on hold. 494 00:23:22,550 --> 00:23:24,199 - I'll see you later, superstar. - See ya. 495 00:23:24,204 --> 00:23:26,364 Bye. 496 00:23:26,369 --> 00:23:27,955 No! No, never that! Never that! 497 00:23:30,267 --> 00:23:31,830 D'arcy number one. 498 00:23:32,204 --> 00:23:34,314 D'arcy is number one. 499 00:23:37,726 --> 00:23:39,146 He just fell. 500 00:23:39,151 --> 00:23:41,161 He'll be fine in a day or two. 501 00:23:41,166 --> 00:23:42,776 He just needs to keep his fluids up. 502 00:23:42,860 --> 00:23:44,360 If he had cut back on the caffeine, 503 00:23:44,365 --> 00:23:46,637 like I told him last time, 504 00:23:46,642 --> 00:23:47,822 he probably wouldn't even be here. 505 00:23:47,826 --> 00:23:50,446 You take away my coffee, I might as well be dead. 506 00:23:50,547 --> 00:23:52,653 And you're not supposed to shame the patient. 507 00:23:52,658 --> 00:23:54,120 Look, I told all the nurses they could shame 508 00:23:54,124 --> 00:23:56,228 and degrade you if it keeps you alive. 509 00:23:56,538 --> 00:23:57,707 Go on, Ellen, tell him how bad it is 510 00:23:57,711 --> 00:23:59,341 to be buttering his meat. 511 00:23:59,346 --> 00:24:00,502 Try blue cheese butter next time. 512 00:24:00,506 --> 00:24:01,586 It's even better. 513 00:24:04,198 --> 00:24:06,028 Look who has flowers. 514 00:24:06,033 --> 00:24:08,008 Aw, you didn't have to buy me those. 515 00:24:08,013 --> 00:24:10,872 Oh, I didn't. These are from Lena Torres. 516 00:24:10,877 --> 00:24:13,346 Well, I'll be damned. You were right. 517 00:24:13,351 --> 00:24:14,849 You know I'm always right. 518 00:24:14,853 --> 00:24:16,476 Wait a minute. Wait a minute. What are you two up to? 519 00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:17,896 You always right about what? 520 00:24:17,901 --> 00:24:20,521 Detective Torres has the hots for you. 521 00:24:20,567 --> 00:24:21,897 - Liv called it. - Oh, God. 522 00:24:21,902 --> 00:24:23,822 How often do y'all talk about this crap, huh? 523 00:24:23,827 --> 00:24:25,034 What, you got a secret sewing circle 524 00:24:25,038 --> 00:24:26,330 or something I don't know about? 525 00:24:26,335 --> 00:24:28,487 Okay. We're just having fun. 526 00:24:28,788 --> 00:24:29,878 It doesn't matter, anyway, 527 00:24:29,883 --> 00:24:32,166 since you're moving back to D.C. 528 00:24:32,787 --> 00:24:35,327 - D.C.? - Uh, it's nothing, Pops. 529 00:24:35,332 --> 00:24:36,872 It's just something that I was considering 530 00:24:36,876 --> 00:24:40,411 that I, uh, shared privately with the deputy. 531 00:24:40,416 --> 00:24:41,629 You never said it was private. 532 00:24:41,634 --> 00:24:43,239 Everything I say to you is private. 533 00:24:43,244 --> 00:24:45,220 If I noticed you was on fire and I told you, 534 00:24:45,225 --> 00:24:46,732 I'd expect you to keep it to yourself. 535 00:24:46,736 --> 00:24:47,923 But then I'd die. 536 00:24:47,928 --> 00:24:49,386 You'd die with honor. 537 00:24:49,391 --> 00:24:50,801 I'm part of this decision too, 538 00:24:50,806 --> 00:24:53,684 - and I'm not moving anywhere. - What? 539 00:24:53,689 --> 00:24:55,265 You're the main one always complaining 540 00:24:55,270 --> 00:24:56,890 about everything you miss about D.C. 541 00:24:56,895 --> 00:24:58,355 I enjoy complaining. 542 00:24:58,397 --> 00:24:59,846 Keeps my heart rate up. 543 00:25:00,232 --> 00:25:01,286 Most important, 544 00:25:01,291 --> 00:25:03,400 as hard as you try to hide it, 545 00:25:03,474 --> 00:25:05,505 I can tell you're happy here. 546 00:25:05,510 --> 00:25:07,060 You don't even know what you're talking about. 547 00:25:07,064 --> 00:25:10,213 You're afraid to be happy. 548 00:25:10,695 --> 00:25:12,615 That don't even make sense. I'm already happy. 549 00:25:12,620 --> 00:25:14,208 I'm the happiest person I know. 550 00:25:14,213 --> 00:25:15,536 I'm so happy all day long, 551 00:25:15,541 --> 00:25:18,036 I whistle hallelujah out of the crack of my ass! 552 00:25:18,041 --> 00:25:20,299 I've never heard that. 553 00:25:20,627 --> 00:25:22,207 Deputy Fred once did a fart 554 00:25:22,212 --> 00:25:23,954 that sounded like the opening chord 555 00:25:23,959 --> 00:25:25,786 of "A Hard Day's Night," though. 556 00:25:27,843 --> 00:25:29,263 Thank you. 557 00:25:29,327 --> 00:25:31,667 Okay, I found a bunch of stuff online 558 00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:34,107 - about the Alpha Draconians. - Mm-hmm. 559 00:25:34,112 --> 00:25:36,064 They're a lizard people, so, what, 560 00:25:36,069 --> 00:25:38,057 we look for them under rocks or something? 561 00:25:38,062 --> 00:25:40,310 Also, are they poisonous like Komodo dragons? 562 00:25:40,315 --> 00:25:43,518 You do not need to worry. I took care of it. 563 00:25:43,896 --> 00:25:46,357 Wait, what do you mean you took care of it? 564 00:25:46,362 --> 00:25:48,701 When we stopped earlier, 565 00:25:48,778 --> 00:25:51,278 that was on latitude 37 north. 566 00:25:51,290 --> 00:25:55,880 It holds a specific energy that amplifies alien signals. 567 00:25:55,943 --> 00:25:58,526 I left them a note. 568 00:25:58,784 --> 00:26:00,670 I thought you were peeing. 569 00:26:00,746 --> 00:26:02,401 I did that too. 570 00:26:04,328 --> 00:26:08,089 _ 571 00:26:09,695 --> 00:26:12,615 Okay, well, what if they don't respond? 572 00:26:12,620 --> 00:26:14,010 And how are they gonna respond to that? 573 00:26:14,014 --> 00:26:15,364 They will respond. 574 00:26:15,369 --> 00:26:18,628 They are egotistical chicken dicks. 575 00:26:19,323 --> 00:26:22,142 Okay, well, now that we've got some time to kill 576 00:26:22,147 --> 00:26:24,103 before D'arcy's race, we might as well spend it 577 00:26:24,108 --> 00:26:25,980 worrying about what some evil aliens are gonna do 578 00:26:25,984 --> 00:26:27,444 now that you pissed them off. 579 00:26:27,449 --> 00:26:28,449 Mm. 580 00:26:29,780 --> 00:26:31,214 Actually... 581 00:26:32,908 --> 00:26:34,988 I have another idea. 582 00:26:39,501 --> 00:26:40,911 Can I help you? 583 00:26:40,916 --> 00:26:43,166 Uh, hi. Yeah, sorry to bother you. 584 00:26:43,385 --> 00:26:45,960 This is gonna sound crazy, but, um, 585 00:26:46,038 --> 00:26:47,418 by any chance, do you know a woman 586 00:26:47,423 --> 00:26:49,263 who may have lived here a long time ago 587 00:26:49,268 --> 00:26:51,688 by the name of Mary-Ellen Taylor? 588 00:26:51,797 --> 00:26:53,503 What do you want? 589 00:26:54,031 --> 00:26:57,678 Um, I apologize for knocking out of the blue. 590 00:26:57,683 --> 00:27:01,943 We were just in the area, and I thought I'd take a shot. 591 00:27:01,978 --> 00:27:03,351 I'm just looking for any information 592 00:27:03,355 --> 00:27:06,315 you may have about her or where she went. 593 00:27:06,935 --> 00:27:08,959 Like I said, what information do you want? 594 00:27:08,964 --> 00:27:10,857 I'm Mary-Ellen. 595 00:27:18,362 --> 00:27:20,954 Look, I never set out to be a mother. 596 00:27:20,959 --> 00:27:22,690 And I wouldn't have been a good one. 597 00:27:23,184 --> 00:27:25,140 I totally get that, and you were young. 598 00:27:25,145 --> 00:27:26,605 Babies are expensive. 599 00:27:26,610 --> 00:27:28,477 We live in America, sweetie. 600 00:27:28,582 --> 00:27:31,431 Plenty of poor people raise kids. 601 00:27:32,993 --> 00:27:35,823 - Yeah. - I'm just not the type. 602 00:27:35,892 --> 00:27:38,612 Yeah, I mean, I was 16 when I got pregnant. 603 00:27:38,617 --> 00:27:40,739 I couldn't imagine taking care of a little life. 604 00:27:40,744 --> 00:27:42,324 I could barely manage my own. 605 00:27:42,329 --> 00:27:44,087 I liked my life the way it was. 606 00:27:44,173 --> 00:27:45,457 Yeah. 607 00:27:45,462 --> 00:27:46,907 Still do. 608 00:27:47,574 --> 00:27:50,374 So you've got a kid? 609 00:27:50,787 --> 00:27:52,125 Her name is Jay. 610 00:27:52,130 --> 00:27:55,590 Asta gave her up because her husband was punchy. 611 00:27:55,666 --> 00:27:57,506 I was in a bad relationship, 612 00:27:57,511 --> 00:27:59,641 but that's done. 613 00:28:00,032 --> 00:28:02,139 Jay is in my life now... 614 00:28:02,217 --> 00:28:03,887 sort of. 615 00:28:03,892 --> 00:28:05,035 I'll show you. 616 00:28:06,150 --> 00:28:08,150 Excuse me a second. 617 00:28:08,521 --> 00:28:09,691 Okay. 618 00:28:09,696 --> 00:28:11,150 Hello? 619 00:28:11,743 --> 00:28:13,587 Well, hello to you too. 620 00:28:14,486 --> 00:28:16,009 Mm-hmm. 621 00:28:16,650 --> 00:28:18,141 5:00 at blackjack. 622 00:28:18,556 --> 00:28:20,542 No you won't, you asshole. 623 00:28:20,602 --> 00:28:21,656 No, you haven't paid me back 624 00:28:21,660 --> 00:28:24,095 since the last time I spotted you. 625 00:28:36,583 --> 00:28:38,463 Marty, hey, look, I got to call you back. 626 00:28:38,468 --> 00:28:40,178 I got some people here. 627 00:28:40,486 --> 00:28:42,592 Yeah. No, just give me, like, five minutes. 628 00:28:42,597 --> 00:28:43,887 All right. 629 00:28:46,213 --> 00:28:47,556 Sorry about that. 630 00:28:47,561 --> 00:28:49,901 He's a pain in my ass. 631 00:28:52,114 --> 00:28:54,470 Ah, so this is Jay. 632 00:29:00,755 --> 00:29:02,465 That is Asta's daughter. 633 00:29:02,470 --> 00:29:04,035 You're supposed to say something, 634 00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:06,450 like, "she is pretty," or "she looks just like you." 635 00:29:06,455 --> 00:29:08,071 Oh, it's fine. 636 00:29:08,464 --> 00:29:10,634 I thought you said you gave her up. 637 00:29:10,867 --> 00:29:14,000 Uh, yeah, I... I did. 638 00:29:14,670 --> 00:29:16,460 So then she's not your daughter, right? 639 00:29:26,749 --> 00:29:30,879 Uh, thank you so much for the water, Mary-Ellen. 640 00:29:30,884 --> 00:29:32,729 Um, we should go. 641 00:29:34,072 --> 00:29:37,242 I know you need to be somewhere. 642 00:29:37,662 --> 00:29:39,649 You can take another cookie if you want. 643 00:29:39,654 --> 00:29:41,784 I don't have much of a sweet tooth. 644 00:29:42,058 --> 00:29:43,993 You know... 645 00:29:44,054 --> 00:29:45,508 Excuse me. 646 00:29:46,875 --> 00:29:49,125 Marty, what did I just say? 647 00:29:49,456 --> 00:29:50,616 What? 648 00:29:50,707 --> 00:29:52,287 No, it's all right. 649 00:29:52,292 --> 00:29:53,680 They're about to leave. 650 00:29:54,534 --> 00:29:55,624 Nah, nothing important. 651 00:29:55,629 --> 00:29:58,883 It was... can you hold on a sec? 652 00:30:00,300 --> 00:30:01,640 Was there something else? 653 00:30:03,688 --> 00:30:05,710 Nothing important. 654 00:30:09,476 --> 00:30:12,008 As a doctor... 655 00:30:12,857 --> 00:30:14,397 smoke more. 656 00:30:23,027 --> 00:30:25,237 I do not care about my alien baby, 657 00:30:25,242 --> 00:30:28,452 even though I have discovered it is my offspring. 658 00:30:28,524 --> 00:30:31,034 Asta's mother is just like me. 659 00:30:31,222 --> 00:30:33,411 She would abandon Asta in the Ice-Wind Desert 660 00:30:33,416 --> 00:30:35,706 and never think of her again, 661 00:30:35,759 --> 00:30:38,219 but Asta does not need to know that. 662 00:30:38,255 --> 00:30:40,675 It is only natural. 663 00:30:40,680 --> 00:30:45,180 You were right to care about my alien baby. 664 00:30:45,425 --> 00:30:48,164 When you share genetic material with a creature, 665 00:30:48,657 --> 00:30:51,352 you cannot help but care for it, 666 00:30:51,866 --> 00:30:55,625 no matter how much you pretend not to. 667 00:30:56,295 --> 00:30:58,103 I know what you're doing, Harry. 668 00:30:58,115 --> 00:31:00,024 What am I doing? 669 00:31:00,158 --> 00:31:02,352 You're trying to make me feel better. 670 00:31:02,656 --> 00:31:04,757 My mother doesn't care about me. 671 00:31:06,103 --> 00:31:09,172 You know, I always had this hole in my past. 672 00:31:09,578 --> 00:31:11,448 It was all a mystery. 673 00:31:11,504 --> 00:31:13,500 Who was she? 674 00:31:13,698 --> 00:31:16,172 You know, what would she be like? 675 00:31:17,047 --> 00:31:19,532 At least now, the hole is filled. 676 00:31:20,755 --> 00:31:22,868 Filled with garbage. 677 00:31:23,503 --> 00:31:24,713 She is garbage. 678 00:31:24,718 --> 00:31:26,388 She is a bag of shit. 679 00:31:27,762 --> 00:31:30,352 Aw, that's sweet, calling my mom shit. 680 00:31:30,357 --> 00:31:32,197 She is poop. 681 00:31:33,676 --> 00:31:35,806 Doo-doo. 682 00:31:35,889 --> 00:31:37,559 - Turd. - Caca. 683 00:31:37,564 --> 00:31:39,234 - Crap. - Number two. 684 00:31:39,239 --> 00:31:42,882 Number three 'cause she's all of them added together! 685 00:31:43,820 --> 00:31:46,077 Thanks, Harry. 686 00:31:47,574 --> 00:31:48,947 Next on the course, 687 00:31:48,952 --> 00:31:50,792 for her final run of the day, 688 00:31:51,077 --> 00:31:53,577 D'arcy Bloom! 689 00:31:57,792 --> 00:31:59,792 All right. 690 00:31:59,844 --> 00:32:02,234 All right, Bloom, you got this. Do your thing. 691 00:32:06,912 --> 00:32:08,882 Athlete, are you ready? 692 00:32:09,179 --> 00:32:12,041 Three, two, one, go! 693 00:32:54,182 --> 00:32:56,232 Yes! Whoo! 694 00:32:56,557 --> 00:32:58,097 Yes! 695 00:33:01,017 --> 00:33:02,727 Looking for someone? 696 00:33:04,360 --> 00:33:05,980 - You came! - Of course I came. 697 00:33:05,985 --> 00:33:07,855 You're incredible. Holy shit! 698 00:33:10,693 --> 00:33:13,321 Thank you for coming. I'm so glad you're here. 699 00:33:13,546 --> 00:33:15,456 Are you kidding? I wouldn't miss it. 700 00:33:15,461 --> 00:33:17,289 That's more than I can say for my parents. 701 00:33:18,171 --> 00:33:19,591 Ah, shit. 702 00:33:19,661 --> 00:33:21,121 Ah, don't worry about them. 703 00:33:21,126 --> 00:33:25,300 You got me and all of them. 704 00:33:33,236 --> 00:33:34,634 So proud of you! 705 00:33:34,639 --> 00:33:36,813 Go, go, go. 706 00:33:36,818 --> 00:33:38,549 All qualifying skiers, 707 00:33:38,554 --> 00:33:40,724 please head to the press tent for a photocall. 708 00:33:40,729 --> 00:33:43,017 That's, uh... I gotta go to this. 709 00:33:43,022 --> 00:33:44,778 Come with me. It's dumb. 710 00:33:44,783 --> 00:33:46,283 It's press photos. It's really stupid. 711 00:33:46,287 --> 00:33:47,450 I hate them. 712 00:33:47,455 --> 00:33:50,166 Shut up. You love this shit. 713 00:34:00,785 --> 00:34:03,455 Honey. Honey, try some of this cider. 714 00:34:03,460 --> 00:34:05,170 - Oh. - It's insane. 715 00:34:08,955 --> 00:34:11,559 - Mm, amazing. - That cost 8 bucks. 716 00:34:11,564 --> 00:34:14,403 - What? - Have a donut. It's 4 bucks. 717 00:34:14,408 --> 00:34:16,353 $4 for a donut? That's ridiculous. 718 00:34:16,358 --> 00:34:18,729 Must be those resort town prices. 719 00:34:19,971 --> 00:34:21,181 You know what? 720 00:34:21,186 --> 00:34:23,476 Actually, I will have two donuts. 721 00:34:23,562 --> 00:34:25,602 Probably had to beat out ten other donut shops 722 00:34:25,607 --> 00:34:26,812 competing for all the tourists. 723 00:34:26,816 --> 00:34:28,619 That's how quality goes up. 724 00:34:30,224 --> 00:34:32,851 The best I have ever had. I mean, what is that? 725 00:34:32,856 --> 00:34:34,463 What is that, coconut? 726 00:34:34,733 --> 00:34:37,363 My God, you are so stubborn. 727 00:34:37,368 --> 00:34:40,739 But hon, I thought we agreed to disagree. 728 00:34:40,744 --> 00:34:43,041 Yeah, well, nobody means that, you know? 729 00:34:46,961 --> 00:34:48,751 Did you see that, doc? 730 00:34:48,834 --> 00:34:50,084 Feeling good. 731 00:34:50,089 --> 00:34:51,870 Looks like maybe your therapy is working. 732 00:34:51,875 --> 00:34:54,255 Did you stop screaming into a pillow 733 00:34:54,260 --> 00:34:56,244 in the living room every morning? 734 00:34:57,847 --> 00:34:59,347 Gonna get another donut. 735 00:35:03,647 --> 00:35:05,397 I scream into the pillow. 736 00:35:07,436 --> 00:35:11,606 I am just going to stare into this fire 737 00:35:11,611 --> 00:35:13,838 until my eyes dry out. 738 00:35:14,788 --> 00:35:16,248 Me too. 739 00:35:21,830 --> 00:35:23,620 Everything okay? 740 00:35:23,990 --> 00:35:26,830 Yeah, I just can't get Ben off this resort thing. 741 00:35:26,835 --> 00:35:28,045 You're a lawyer. 742 00:35:28,085 --> 00:35:29,542 Why are you spending so much energy worrying 743 00:35:29,546 --> 00:35:31,096 about one man's opinion? 744 00:35:31,644 --> 00:35:32,755 What do you mean? 745 00:35:32,760 --> 00:35:34,837 I did some research on temporary restraining orders, 746 00:35:34,842 --> 00:35:36,589 which is what we would need to halt progress 747 00:35:36,594 --> 00:35:39,041 before a preliminary injunction hearing. 748 00:35:39,639 --> 00:35:41,213 Are you in? 749 00:35:41,672 --> 00:35:42,762 When do we start? 750 00:35:43,070 --> 00:35:44,514 Guess who's going to Vail 751 00:35:44,519 --> 00:35:46,899 for the Hardpack tournament in three weeks? 752 00:35:46,972 --> 00:35:48,142 There she is, the... 753 00:35:48,147 --> 00:35:50,791 Good job, best friend! 754 00:35:51,355 --> 00:35:54,724 Okay. Come here. Speech! 755 00:35:54,729 --> 00:35:58,126 All right, well, it really... 756 00:35:59,158 --> 00:36:01,698 It really means a lot that you are all here. 757 00:36:01,703 --> 00:36:02,793 What did you do? 758 00:36:02,798 --> 00:36:04,098 We love you, D'arce. 759 00:36:04,103 --> 00:36:06,150 I love you the most! 760 00:36:06,454 --> 00:36:11,124 Anyway, I want to introduce Elliot, my boyfriend. 761 00:36:11,129 --> 00:36:12,542 - Hi. - Hi, Elliot. 762 00:36:12,547 --> 00:36:13,917 - Hey. - Hi. 763 00:36:13,922 --> 00:36:15,128 Hey, Elliot. 764 00:36:15,466 --> 00:36:16,926 Elliot, this is Asta. 765 00:36:16,931 --> 00:36:18,231 Hey. Elliot. 766 00:36:18,236 --> 00:36:20,262 Hey, come on, get in here. 767 00:36:20,267 --> 00:36:23,871 I have heard so many things about you... all good. 768 00:36:23,876 --> 00:36:25,301 How about our girl, though, huh? 769 00:36:25,306 --> 00:36:26,556 Making the Hardpack tournament? 770 00:36:26,561 --> 00:36:27,651 Yeah. 771 00:36:27,656 --> 00:36:29,465 Well, you know what? 772 00:36:29,470 --> 00:36:32,121 Uh, cider on me, everybody. 773 00:36:33,610 --> 00:36:35,025 They are $8 each. 774 00:36:35,030 --> 00:36:37,184 Okay, somebody buy this champ a cider. 775 00:36:37,189 --> 00:36:38,989 I got you. 776 00:36:39,062 --> 00:36:40,862 - Get in here. - Donut? 777 00:36:40,867 --> 00:36:42,230 - Hi. - Oh. 778 00:36:42,235 --> 00:36:44,355 - Elliot! - Yes. 779 00:36:49,840 --> 00:36:52,079 ♪ It's gonna be all right ♪ 780 00:36:55,080 --> 00:36:56,500 What the hell? 781 00:36:59,218 --> 00:37:01,196 You okay on gas? 782 00:37:01,841 --> 00:37:04,665 Yeah, I've got half a tank. 783 00:37:08,019 --> 00:37:09,149 Asta? 784 00:37:11,225 --> 00:37:12,385 Asta! 785 00:37:15,474 --> 00:37:17,774 Uh, okay. 786 00:37:17,779 --> 00:37:19,844 That makes no sense. 787 00:37:20,657 --> 00:37:22,376 Are you okay, Harry? 788 00:37:23,938 --> 00:37:26,139 No, I am not. 789 00:37:26,511 --> 00:37:28,101 Let's go. 790 00:37:39,642 --> 00:37:41,222 This is it. 791 00:37:41,532 --> 00:37:44,119 This is where I saw a UFO when I was ten. 792 00:37:44,201 --> 00:37:45,439 What? 793 00:37:45,444 --> 00:37:47,929 We were on a class camping trip. 794 00:37:48,492 --> 00:37:51,267 I tried to tell the teacher, but he didn't believe me. 795 00:37:51,272 --> 00:37:52,644 Okay, now, look, no offense, Deputy, 796 00:37:52,648 --> 00:37:54,104 but if you was ten years old, right, how you know 797 00:37:54,108 --> 00:37:55,861 it just wasn't your imagination? 798 00:37:55,866 --> 00:37:57,071 I saw it. 799 00:37:59,530 --> 00:38:01,490 I know. 800 00:38:01,565 --> 00:38:04,155 It's safer to be a skeptic. 801 00:38:04,160 --> 00:38:06,790 But sometimes, don't you want to see the world 802 00:38:06,795 --> 00:38:08,835 as just a little bit magical? 803 00:38:11,500 --> 00:38:14,007 You know, when my mom was alive, 804 00:38:14,489 --> 00:38:18,039 my dad, he was a completely different guy. 805 00:38:19,509 --> 00:38:20,588 You should have seen him. 806 00:38:20,593 --> 00:38:22,272 He had this light inside of him, 807 00:38:22,277 --> 00:38:23,797 right, especially when she was around. 808 00:38:23,981 --> 00:38:26,041 He used to always say he loved the sound of her key 809 00:38:26,046 --> 00:38:27,595 in the door because that's how he knew 810 00:38:27,600 --> 00:38:28,971 the party was about to start. 811 00:38:30,844 --> 00:38:32,577 But when she died, 812 00:38:34,065 --> 00:38:36,285 that light went out, 813 00:38:36,356 --> 00:38:39,874 just like, poof, just gone. 814 00:38:40,921 --> 00:38:45,179 But he got to have it for a long time. 815 00:38:46,372 --> 00:38:50,389 I believe life tries to give us gifts, 816 00:38:51,039 --> 00:38:53,829 but we have to be open to receiving them. 817 00:38:53,834 --> 00:38:55,594 Yeah. 818 00:38:55,628 --> 00:38:57,628 I can see that. 819 00:38:58,038 --> 00:39:02,140 I mean, that's why I keep coming back here. 820 00:39:02,491 --> 00:39:05,925 I mean, sure, I feel silly just sitting here 821 00:39:05,930 --> 00:39:08,343 all alone like some weirdo. 822 00:39:08,614 --> 00:39:13,595 But one of these times, they might be back. 823 00:39:13,600 --> 00:39:15,533 Now, see, that's where you're wrong. 824 00:39:15,538 --> 00:39:17,144 You don't think they're going to come back? 825 00:39:17,148 --> 00:39:18,487 Oh, no, I don't know nothing about that. 826 00:39:18,491 --> 00:39:21,961 I just know that you are not all alone. 827 00:39:33,406 --> 00:39:35,496 Okay, just tell me you hate him. 828 00:39:35,540 --> 00:39:37,509 You hate him. That's fine. All right? 829 00:39:37,514 --> 00:39:38,917 The sooner you say it, the sooner I can dump him, 830 00:39:38,921 --> 00:39:40,591 and we could just go back to normal. 831 00:39:40,646 --> 00:39:43,026 Elliot? No, I love him. 832 00:39:43,091 --> 00:39:45,217 I... he's... he's lovely. 833 00:39:45,222 --> 00:39:46,780 He's great, right? 834 00:39:50,431 --> 00:39:53,931 If that's not it, what's... what's going on? 835 00:39:54,350 --> 00:39:56,462 Well, uh... 836 00:39:56,474 --> 00:40:01,325 I met my mother today. 837 00:40:01,631 --> 00:40:03,217 Oh. 838 00:40:03,911 --> 00:40:07,709 Wow, wh... how'd it go? 839 00:40:12,978 --> 00:40:14,108 D'arcy... 840 00:40:17,432 --> 00:40:18,642 Come here. 841 00:40:18,647 --> 00:40:20,879 Before today, I thought parenting 842 00:40:20,884 --> 00:40:24,189 meant an older human taking care of a younger one, 843 00:40:24,194 --> 00:40:26,219 feeding it, clothing it, 844 00:40:26,274 --> 00:40:29,545 making sure it didn't get eaten by wolves. 845 00:40:30,965 --> 00:40:32,678 But sometimes it means protecting them 846 00:40:32,691 --> 00:40:34,611 emotionally too. 847 00:40:36,452 --> 00:40:38,242 This protective instinct isn't unique 848 00:40:38,247 --> 00:40:40,577 to the biological child. 849 00:40:41,605 --> 00:40:44,264 Humans parent their partners too. 850 00:40:45,684 --> 00:40:48,444 They parent their friends when they need to be guided, 851 00:40:48,449 --> 00:40:51,029 when they are afraid or in danger. 852 00:40:53,738 --> 00:40:57,328 But how do you parent when you're in danger too? 853 00:40:57,333 --> 00:41:00,343 - What the hell? - You okay on gas? 854 00:41:00,756 --> 00:41:02,792 Yeah, I have half a tank. 855 00:41:05,698 --> 00:41:06,698 Asta? 856 00:41:08,726 --> 00:41:10,306 Asta! 857 00:41:36,956 --> 00:41:39,206 You are wrong. 858 00:41:39,424 --> 00:41:42,665 It is not the Alpha Draconians here on Earth. 859 00:41:42,677 --> 00:41:45,955 And please, stop sending them messages. 860 00:41:45,960 --> 00:41:49,220 We don't need those idiots down here. 861 00:41:49,225 --> 00:41:51,265 You are the Greys. 862 00:41:52,847 --> 00:41:54,467 What are you doing here? 863 00:41:54,547 --> 00:41:56,887 The Greys have never cared about the Earth. 864 00:41:56,892 --> 00:42:01,345 Oh, my, you are so stupid. 865 00:42:01,350 --> 00:42:06,123 When you say, oh my, does that mean my? 866 00:42:06,128 --> 00:42:07,546 Not yours. 867 00:42:07,559 --> 00:42:10,577 - There is an O in it. - Oh, yours. 868 00:42:10,582 --> 00:42:12,462 - Oh, my. - Oh, my? 869 00:42:12,474 --> 00:42:14,085 Oh, my. 870 00:42:14,304 --> 00:42:16,557 Is this a Grey saying? 871 00:42:16,562 --> 00:42:21,662 It is an expression like "wow!" and "holy shit!" 872 00:42:21,667 --> 00:42:24,087 Why do you move so much when you say it? 873 00:42:24,092 --> 00:42:27,042 Because I'm freezing my Grey dick off! 874 00:42:27,393 --> 00:42:28,393 Oh, my. 875 00:42:28,398 --> 00:42:29,680 We know who you are. 876 00:42:29,843 --> 00:42:32,658 It's no use trying to get in our way 877 00:42:32,663 --> 00:42:37,132 because we will destroy you and everyone you care about. 878 00:43:05,761 --> 00:43:07,556 That makes no sense. 879 00:43:08,751 --> 00:43:10,211 You okay, Harry? 880 00:43:15,720 --> 00:43:18,035 What I learned today is that sometimes parenting 881 00:43:18,040 --> 00:43:19,893 means pretending to feel safe. 882 00:43:19,898 --> 00:43:21,198 Oh, my God! 883 00:43:23,978 --> 00:43:25,845 Was that guy in his underwear? 884 00:43:25,850 --> 00:43:27,962 Even when you don't. 885 00:43:36,153 --> 00:43:37,363 Get back here! 886 00:43:37,368 --> 00:43:39,828 Don't hurt him, please! 887 00:43:39,972 --> 00:43:41,722 Honey, stop! 61148

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