Original subtitles

How can you stand working in a dump like

this?Looks like you don't get much in

here besides skip tracers, escaped cons,

roaches... and Lobo.

He ain't as bad as he looks. Hey,

watch it! What are you trying to do?Take

my head off?!

Don't mind if I do.

I heard Lobo made this bet with this

other dude. A real

good-looking guy named a Sunny Jim

over some babe. You know, to see

which one could nail her first. Lobo?

He'd never do a thing like that. Maybe he

is a little crude, but deep down, he's

really just a sensitive little boy.

Dragonflyin', Gherkin. Fly

this!

What if I told you your sensitive

little boy carved up Sonny Jim's

face real bad, just so he'd

lose the bet?

No way. Way. You

see, you're the one we made the bet over,

Darlene. You're Sonny Jim?

But you can call me Loverboy.

Your hands off me! I get that a

lot nowadays. Honey, you

fraggin' two-bit grifter! Any butt-wipe

you get chicks with knockout daff!

You always were a class act, Bo! I

got your class right here.

My bite! Fraggin' bastards

ohh You let yourself in for a world of

hurt, Jimbo. Trashmere man.

BASS FUCK

Now you've done it, Sonny Jim.

You're dead meat!

You live in a flea market?'Cause you said

we were going back to your place. I

changed my-- Like, gassing me wasn't

tacky enough. This is your idea of a date?

Listen, woman. Wait a minute. You don't

think you're gonna sell me?!

Screw the bet. I got 'em. What do I look

like to use, some kind of used appliance?

Don't be ridiculous. An appliance comes

with an off switch.

First he cheats on the bed, then he

trashes my spats. I'll save

this much for old son of Jed. He's got

balls. Can't wait to see what they look

like in his ears.

ohh I feel like a snack. Give me a

candied head, will ya?

Hey Dubo, wanna buy a human female?

What's wrong with her?

Loose jaw. What the hell?

The rest I can sell for parts. I want two

thousand. Not with badass

Hey!

Lobo, thank God! I'm taking her off your

hands, sonny boy. Don't tempt

me. I need the money. Huh Take a

hike here!

Thanks, Clyde. I think you cleaned away

most of my plaque.

Don't forget to floss, fat ass

Ohh

What next, Pie Face?Mud wrestling?

there's a motel I heard about in the next

quadrant

you have to cut through here this is the

mental zone nobody ever comes out of here

Tell me.

Drag the main man on a wild geek chase to

the interstellar manager's planet. By the

time I get done with Sonny Jim, he'll be

in so many pieces, he'll be paying rent

all over the galaxy.

Whoa!

Alas, poor climb.

Elliot, pick up. I know you're there.

Come on, man, I'm lost again.

Freakin' buttwipe.

Enough sights here. Better find Darlene.

What an assholeDo you see a gas

station around here?Anywhere?How was

I supposed to... Lobo wouldn't be that

stupid, you know. Lobo wouldn't try

flying 40 parsecs in a ship with no

bathroom! No, I...

I, uh.. Well,

uh.. OhhOh, for Christ's sake, will you

just ask for directions already?!

Feelz Giz!

This place sucks!

.....

ohh

Rag off!

You're bean countin' deep wine!

Then again, this place has its perks.

Okay boys, come and get it!

I got your fraggin' stock options right

here!

Yeah!

Lobo?Out of my way, piss

face! Lobo! I'm over

here! Come save me! Yeah, right! He'll

save her. For a midnight snack.

yeah Beatles

did. I ain't been this dope since I

spragged my own planet.

Lobo, is that you?

Keep shooting! I'm coming!

Sounds like just my type.

Wait 'til you hear what Sunny Jim asked

me to swallow. He said you two made a bet

to see who could date me first. I called

him a liar. Fragen-ay, he lied.

I said, Drill ya, not date ya.

You! But... you mean...

You...

Later, honey buns.

Let's go, Jimbo.

Now I'm really mad! That tears it!

Now you've really pissed off

The main man!

Ball?The head?He's addressing the head,

he's lining up.

Four.

Four. Four.

Four.

Ow! Yeah, is it too late for a simple

apology?Well, if you promise not to be a

pain in the ass about it,I'll bring you

in alive.

Of

course there's different ways you can

define a lot.

ohh

So, what are we going for, babe?

It's fragging time.

But first, another drinky-winky.

Frag, yeah.

HuhWhat's that, Darlene?

So there you are, honeybuns.

Oh. Oh,Yeah.

Oh yeah, baby. That's...

Damn the main man, will ya?

You

nasty

slimy!

Okay, suppose I was willing to break

your brother out of jail. What's in it

for the main man?

Cuban cigars from Earth.

Got a whole stash of a...

Okay. Ah

Lobo's my name, and jail breakin's

my game. Your

one lug, the sponge!

You've been breathing too much air! You

know the penalty! The hole!

Frag that.

umm

Wow. Holy fragaroli,

Major Snake! My

favorite rocker. So where's

Slaz?We gotta go!

Again?! Oh, uh,

well, who are you?

Never mind. Your brother hired me to

bust you out of here. Oh, we can't leave

now! It's Major Snake's birthday!

What do you mean we?Butt wipe. Whoa...

Oh, please, wait!

FREEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Nothing's coming between me and my

Cubans! Slaz, I'm

busting your ass out of there! Like it or

not!

Slaz! I'm busting your ass out of there!

Whether you like it or

not. Happy birthday, Snape!

I'm glad we're keeping the party small,

and no messy breakouts to ruin things.

Chow is here, come and get it!

Geez, Slaz, you're as light as fragging

air. Don't they feed ya?What happened?

Go on, snake! Open it! HuhSo far, so

here. Open what?

We got off on the wrong foot, Slaz. Let's

be friends. Yay, I like

that!

Oops, my bad.

Time to make a wish! What?I don't...

A prison rocks!

Fetus giz! Now I'm pissing

Wait a fragging minute, Bo. You're going

at this all wrong. Ah,

green M&M's. Your bro Snip's

throwing a party...

...just for the snake. Yay! Party! Party!

Yeah, so hustle up, jab-ronies. What the?

Intruder alert! Intruder alert!

Deadly floor

mop her on! Uh, uh, wait.

Meds?Octobong?Step it up, you slug.

We got incoming.

It just ain't my fraggin' day!

Fresh meat.

Grab your boyfriend, Razorface! Let's

move! My ride is just outside!

Stepping up, you bastages! Fetal skids!

You slugs need to hit the gym! It's

Snake! His meds make him bloat!

Oh, he's got a hurl! Oh...

Oh...

Frag.

You're really a chunk in my stool, Snake!

'Bout time you made yourself useful.

What the frag?One of too

many. ShitWe're safe, Snake!

Uh, cool.

Good job, Slaz, throw up there.

I'm back citizens. Where's the Cubans?

Lobo, hey Slaz, you did it!

Big bro! Little bro,

give me a hug.

Hey, wait! Ah,

frag. Hey, what about

my Cubans?Hmm

Yeah!

What others promise, he'll deliver.

Integrity, truthfulness,

candor. A president who will reach out a

hand to forge a new partnership with

the people. This

is crap!

Lobo. The end of slickness and

evasion. A president who is dynamic,

resourceful, able to make a difference in

people's lives.

And he gives them what they deserve.

Lobo. He brings people together.

Real leadership. That means honest

answers to tough questions. Solutions,

not blame. Lobo will put an end to

partisan squabbling and divisiveness.

He's a man who cares more about results

than ideology. Eat lead ya scrotal

sacks! And knows how to marshal his

resources to get the job done.

ohh Not

enough executive experience, my opponent

says. A vote for Lobo- FRACK THIS!

This is crap! Let's cut the bulls**t

in this f***ing place. You jacks**

and assh**don't give a about issues.

Stupid fucking bastard kissed by

hairy infested assAll you want

is a guy who looks good on TV.

this. The end you've been waiting for.

Where do you think you're going, Bo?You

said my bike would be ready today. What's

that?What's that?My bike!

Not until you settle up. No more

credit.

Last time you paid your bill.

He was a skinhead!

Fragging bastards

Last time, Clyde! Where's my

bike?If I

frag you, I never find it.

Ah, Fetel's Gaze.

Lookit, there's 20,000 creds on this

bastard's head. That'll pay for the bike,

some new gear,And three nights

with the Nutcracker sisters.

Uh, just one thing. I need a loader.

No, can't do. Ain't got a thing to load.

Except maybe...

I'll see you two sardines and I'll put

down six more! What

the frag am I supposed to do with space

penguins?

Could you maybe move your foot a little?I

got lower back pain you could flush from.

Shut up! Hand off some pain, then we

get stacked into nuts! Ohh

Jeez!

Just shut the frag up and show me how to

land this thing!

Be careful not to touch that!

Hey, Paul! Hey, Stump.

You know you're maxed out on charge card,

don't you, buddy?Come on, Stump. I

need the heat to nail this assholeI'll

make enough off this score to pay off

every bastard I owe. In that case,

here. No, no

He's just tracking device!

I'll take it!

This must be the place.

Wait here!

Gimme a 186! We

don't have a 186! Yes!

see you do. That's

number two.

93 times.

HuhThat ain't no

porkin'.

That's some tapeworm.

Yo, Snake Bitch I'm looking for a guy

from Porcusate. Name's Mud Boy. What

are you?Yeah,

right. I'm a skip tracer, and this track

in Gizmo says you're the skip.

Perkins... a

swine voice.

What do I look like to you?My

Johnson with herpes.

You can't have my boy.

He's gone.

Non?What the frag are you talking about?

I ate him. Delicious.

You ate this guy?

You owe me 10,000 credits, you bastard

I run the jails here. Mud Boy got

busted and I was his executioner.

But he ain't dead yet?He won't be

digested for another six

One way or another, you're gonna cough up

the money you cost me!

Oh.

Had enough?There's nothing left to eat.

Hey!We're not gonna carry you and

Dad! Yo,

lizard lips! Have I got a deal for

you! You like sauteed penguins?There

you go. Could you maybe not stand so

close?You got puke breath!

Daddy, you hate washing cars. You'll

do as you're told. Hey, fat ass

I've got your money. The Porkins handed

me the reward on the spot.

Ladies?

In cash. Five damn

20 large covers the past, though. The

rest will cover your bike. Too bad

there's none left for you.

How old did you girls say you were?