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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,940 --> 00:00:15,119 - Previously, on "Happy!"... - "Easter Under Siege." 2 00:00:15,120 --> 00:00:16,539 We're a hit, baby! 3 00:00:16,540 --> 00:00:18,413 I run the third-largest network in the nation. 4 00:00:18,414 --> 00:00:19,915 I have everything a man could wish for. 5 00:00:19,916 --> 00:00:21,792 What about the things a man shouldn't wish for? 6 00:00:21,793 --> 00:00:23,389 You're firing me. 7 00:00:23,390 --> 00:00:24,779 You don't give me any choice! 8 00:00:24,780 --> 00:00:26,880 There is something inside me. 9 00:00:28,007 --> 00:00:30,968 I'm done being everyone's bitch, Dr. Reddy. 10 00:00:32,470 --> 00:00:35,969 You know you are a dead man, Blue rat. 11 00:00:35,970 --> 00:00:38,120 You, me, under the bleachers. 12 00:00:39,510 --> 00:00:42,209 No! Help me! 13 00:00:42,210 --> 00:00:43,579 You almost got hurt back there. 14 00:00:43,580 --> 00:00:46,179 Looking for these? 15 00:00:46,180 --> 00:00:47,939 You knew I needed money for Hailey's school. 16 00:00:47,940 --> 00:00:49,119 You used me, Mer. 17 00:00:49,120 --> 00:00:50,696 - Yeah, I did. - Yeah. 18 00:00:50,697 --> 00:00:52,322 This very simple "B and E" of yours, 19 00:00:52,323 --> 00:00:54,616 it turned out not to be quite so simple. 20 00:00:54,617 --> 00:00:55,789 Sonny Shine. 21 00:00:55,790 --> 00:00:57,919 - A few guards showed up. - And? 22 00:00:57,920 --> 00:01:00,019 And I'm standing here with the tapes. 23 00:01:00,020 --> 00:01:01,259 Proof is on these tapes. 24 00:01:01,260 --> 00:01:03,375 The people on these tapes protect him. 25 00:01:03,376 --> 00:01:05,586 He goes down, they go down. 26 00:01:05,587 --> 00:01:08,505 Holy guacamole, it's Dayglo Doug! 27 00:01:09,610 --> 00:01:12,050 Who the fuck's Dayglo Doug? 28 00:01:18,110 --> 00:01:19,679 Here we go! 29 00:01:19,680 --> 00:01:21,319 Abracadabra! 30 00:01:23,620 --> 00:01:26,999 - Bunny! - Ow, oh! I'm Julius Caesar! 31 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:30,079 You can't do this to me! 32 00:01:30,080 --> 00:01:32,819 Say something sweet and eat something sour. 33 00:01:32,820 --> 00:01:34,029 Magic and laughs 34 00:01:34,030 --> 00:01:36,699 on the "Dayglo Doug Power Hour"! 35 00:01:36,700 --> 00:01:39,161 Yeah! 36 00:01:39,162 --> 00:01:40,662 Hey, there! 37 00:01:40,663 --> 00:01:43,290 Uh, no, no, no, no. No applause. 38 00:01:43,291 --> 00:01:44,439 No applause. 39 00:01:44,440 --> 00:01:47,378 I am not worthy. Thank you. 40 00:01:57,020 --> 00:01:58,847 - We love you! - Yeah! 41 00:01:58,848 --> 00:02:01,119 We love you, Doug! 42 00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:03,229 And it's that love... 43 00:02:03,230 --> 00:02:06,299 that has made "The Dayglo Doug Power Hour" 44 00:02:06,300 --> 00:02:09,499 the top-rated cable-access kid's show 45 00:02:09,500 --> 00:02:11,399 in the greater Toledo area. 46 00:02:13,200 --> 00:02:16,300 And only a handful of shows can make that claim. 47 00:02:20,980 --> 00:02:22,440 But... 48 00:02:23,710 --> 00:02:27,419 The time has come for old Doug... 49 00:02:27,420 --> 00:02:30,120 to hang up his hat. 50 00:02:31,190 --> 00:02:33,239 This will be the last day I host 51 00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:36,679 the "Dayglo Doug Power Hour." 52 00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:40,520 Aww, no! 53 00:02:42,260 --> 00:02:45,400 Before I get too emotional... 54 00:02:47,270 --> 00:02:48,919 I wanna introduce you 55 00:02:48,920 --> 00:02:52,039 to the new host of the power hour, 56 00:02:52,040 --> 00:02:55,379 and your new best friend... 57 00:02:55,380 --> 00:02:57,679 Sonny Shine! 58 00:03:12,490 --> 00:03:15,619 Dayglo Doug, everybody! 59 00:03:15,620 --> 00:03:18,840 His best trick? 60 00:03:18,845 --> 00:03:21,012 Vanishing from his own show. 61 00:03:21,013 --> 00:03:24,266 But seriously, Doug. 62 00:03:24,267 --> 00:03:27,109 Now you'll have plenty of time to devote to your... 63 00:03:27,110 --> 00:03:28,400 passions. 64 00:03:29,080 --> 00:03:31,279 You may not know it, but our buddy Doug 65 00:03:31,280 --> 00:03:33,159 is quite the aficionado on a little something 66 00:03:33,160 --> 00:03:34,939 you might have studied in school: 67 00:03:34,940 --> 00:03:36,599 World War II. 68 00:03:39,520 --> 00:03:41,389 Look it up. 69 00:03:41,390 --> 00:03:43,129 But I've been thinking, Double-D. 70 00:03:43,130 --> 00:03:46,729 Will you even have time to join us as a guest star? 71 00:03:46,730 --> 00:03:49,219 Sure, that... that'd be super. 72 00:03:49,220 --> 00:03:52,369 But then I think about Episode 186. 73 00:03:52,370 --> 00:03:54,699 "Episode 186"? 74 00:03:54,700 --> 00:03:56,465 The Band-Aid episode? 75 00:03:56,466 --> 00:03:57,639 Correcto. 76 00:03:57,640 --> 00:03:59,319 Where you taught us all how 77 00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:01,219 tearing off the Band-Aid quickly was 78 00:04:01,220 --> 00:04:04,249 really the only healthy way to move forward. 79 00:04:04,250 --> 00:04:06,619 Isn't that right, kids? 80 00:04:12,620 --> 00:04:15,559 And now, let's cue the music. 81 00:04:15,560 --> 00:04:18,359 Because we'd all like to remember you... 82 00:04:18,360 --> 00:04:21,299 just the way you are. 83 00:04:24,270 --> 00:04:27,919 ♪ Oh, fatherland, fatherland ♪ 84 00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:30,259 ♪ Show us a sign ♪ 85 00:04:30,260 --> 00:04:35,212 ♪ Your children are waiting to see ♪ 86 00:04:35,213 --> 00:04:37,959 ♪ The morning will come ♪ 87 00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:39,979 ♪ When the world ♪ 88 00:04:39,980 --> 00:04:43,579 ♪ Is mine ♪ 89 00:04:43,580 --> 00:04:46,890 ♪ Tomorrow belongs ♪ 90 00:04:46,891 --> 00:04:49,219 ♪ To me ♪ 91 00:04:49,220 --> 00:04:50,500 Doug? 92 00:04:51,190 --> 00:04:54,800 Doug, one question for the aficionado before you go: 93 00:04:56,120 --> 00:05:00,028 About how tall would you say Winston Churchill was? 94 00:05:00,029 --> 00:05:01,259 Churchill? 95 00:05:01,260 --> 00:05:02,269 About that tall. 96 00:05:02,270 --> 00:05:04,590 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - -- www.addic7ed.com -- 97 00:05:05,170 --> 00:05:07,899 Imagine it: Dayglo Doug was there 98 00:05:07,900 --> 00:05:09,239 when Sonny started. 99 00:05:09,240 --> 00:05:12,239 What's the world, uh, when you're part of history? 100 00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:14,539 - "Fossil." - Yeah, Sax, I get it. 101 00:05:14,540 --> 00:05:16,059 He's old. What's your point? 102 00:05:16,060 --> 00:05:18,659 I dunno, let's see: He's senile, wears leotards. 103 00:05:18,660 --> 00:05:20,599 No, sounds like a slam-dunk witness 104 00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:21,999 to build the foundation of your case on. 105 00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:24,379 Top flight police work, Mer, digging up this gem. 106 00:05:24,380 --> 00:05:26,419 It's not my case. It's ours. 107 00:05:26,420 --> 00:05:28,429 Remember? 108 00:05:28,430 --> 00:05:30,329 We're here. 109 00:05:37,480 --> 00:05:39,440 Cut my beard off after 9/11. 110 00:05:39,443 --> 00:05:41,649 And you're here to see? 111 00:05:41,650 --> 00:05:43,039 Doug Thorn. 112 00:05:46,010 --> 00:05:48,239 Mr. Thorn doesn't take visitors. 113 00:05:50,050 --> 00:05:51,879 He'll make an exception. 114 00:05:54,333 --> 00:05:56,836 Did you get that out of a Cracker Jack box? 115 00:05:56,837 --> 00:05:59,199 It was my dad's. 116 00:05:59,200 --> 00:06:02,259 You really stepped in number two with that one, Nick. 117 00:06:02,260 --> 00:06:04,199 I'll step on you. 118 00:06:07,170 --> 00:06:08,479 What's the matter? 119 00:06:08,480 --> 00:06:10,800 Old people. 120 00:06:11,470 --> 00:06:12,840 What? 121 00:06:12,850 --> 00:06:14,219 They don't like me, I don't like them. 122 00:06:14,220 --> 00:06:15,879 And that whole building is filled with them. 123 00:06:15,880 --> 00:06:17,679 You smell that? 124 00:06:17,680 --> 00:06:19,901 That's them. 125 00:06:21,520 --> 00:06:23,940 Whoa, whoa. Hey, psst. 126 00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:25,199 Hey, pal, pal. 127 00:06:25,200 --> 00:06:27,179 - Hey, hey, you mind? - For residents only. 128 00:06:27,180 --> 00:06:28,283 Yeah, I got a blood sugar thing. 129 00:06:28,284 --> 00:06:30,059 If you're hungry, 130 00:06:30,060 --> 00:06:32,129 there's a vending machine in the restroom. 131 00:06:32,130 --> 00:06:34,789 "The restroom"? Fuck this place. 132 00:06:34,790 --> 00:06:36,199 Geez! 133 00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:38,000 Are you my son? 134 00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:42,440 Dr. Kevorkian's that way. 135 00:06:46,310 --> 00:06:47,740 Thank you. 136 00:06:47,750 --> 00:06:49,539 Uh, for my next trick, 137 00:06:49,540 --> 00:06:51,859 I would like you to look... 138 00:06:51,860 --> 00:06:54,019 at this hat. 139 00:06:54,020 --> 00:06:55,579 What do you see inside? 140 00:06:55,580 --> 00:06:56,840 Nothing, right? 141 00:06:59,220 --> 00:07:01,679 Is that really Dayglo Doug? 142 00:07:01,680 --> 00:07:04,379 He looks different. 143 00:07:04,380 --> 00:07:07,019 Get to the Polish jokes! 144 00:07:07,020 --> 00:07:08,649 There's your star witness. 145 00:07:08,650 --> 00:07:10,099 I will punch you in the throat. 146 00:07:10,100 --> 00:07:12,519 So, man comes home from work 147 00:07:12,520 --> 00:07:14,149 with a duck under his arm. 148 00:07:14,150 --> 00:07:15,979 His wife answers the door. 149 00:07:15,980 --> 00:07:17,624 "This is the pig I've been fucking," 150 00:07:17,625 --> 00:07:18,629 the man says. 151 00:07:18,630 --> 00:07:21,279 The wife says, "That's a duck, not a pig." 152 00:07:21,280 --> 00:07:24,005 The man says, "I'm not talking to you." 153 00:07:29,530 --> 00:07:30,669 I don't get it. 154 00:07:30,670 --> 00:07:32,979 I was going to close this set 155 00:07:32,980 --> 00:07:35,169 by cutting a woman in half. 156 00:07:35,170 --> 00:07:37,439 Unfortunately... 157 00:07:37,440 --> 00:07:40,539 my assistant passed away this morning, 158 00:07:40,540 --> 00:07:44,479 so I would like to dedicate today's show... 159 00:07:44,480 --> 00:07:45,700 to Gladys. 160 00:07:46,700 --> 00:07:48,299 She died as she lived. 161 00:07:48,300 --> 00:07:50,979 Showing off her box for a nickel? 162 00:07:59,166 --> 00:08:01,001 Mr. Thorn? 163 00:08:01,002 --> 00:08:02,899 May we have a few words? 164 00:08:02,900 --> 00:08:04,360 Ugh... 165 00:08:07,970 --> 00:08:10,677 Big as a baby's arm with an apple in its fist. 166 00:08:10,678 --> 00:08:13,299 I think the word you're looking for is "jumbo." 167 00:08:13,300 --> 00:08:15,009 I'm immune to flattery. 168 00:08:15,010 --> 00:08:16,933 And disease. 169 00:08:16,934 --> 00:08:19,436 Now spill it, cops. Who violated my inner sanctum? 170 00:08:19,437 --> 00:08:20,919 There's a loaded question. 171 00:08:20,920 --> 00:08:22,549 Can we talk... 172 00:08:22,550 --> 00:08:24,607 openly? 173 00:08:24,608 --> 00:08:26,401 Dario doesn't understand a lick of English. 174 00:08:26,402 --> 00:08:28,059 Hold still. 175 00:08:31,760 --> 00:08:33,919 TBH... 176 00:08:33,920 --> 00:08:36,300 we, uh, don't have a lot to go on. 177 00:08:36,320 --> 00:08:38,319 And by that we mean "nada surf." 178 00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:40,979 And seeing as how you wiped the whole place clean 179 00:08:40,980 --> 00:08:42,319 before we got here... 180 00:08:42,320 --> 00:08:44,759 Well, this crime scene's got more blood traces 181 00:08:44,760 --> 00:08:47,379 than Chicago on St. Valentine's Day. 182 00:08:47,380 --> 00:08:49,007 But no bodies. 183 00:08:49,008 --> 00:08:51,049 The only witness was your wife. 184 00:08:51,050 --> 00:08:52,579 She... 185 00:08:52,580 --> 00:08:54,019 fingered the pool boy. 186 00:08:54,020 --> 00:08:55,179 Don't remind me. 187 00:08:55,180 --> 00:08:58,590 Who she says was here with a little blue unicorn. 188 00:08:59,460 --> 00:09:00,659 With wings. 189 00:09:00,660 --> 00:09:02,239 Bebe's last coherent thought 190 00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:04,820 was during the Carter administration. 191 00:09:05,830 --> 00:09:07,569 You're missing the point. 192 00:09:07,570 --> 00:09:09,861 This is not an official investigation. 193 00:09:09,862 --> 00:09:11,559 There will be no official reports 194 00:09:11,560 --> 00:09:13,809 of any stiffs on my grounds. 195 00:09:13,810 --> 00:09:15,819 There will be no official statements taken 196 00:09:15,820 --> 00:09:18,709 from my smoking hot wife or anyone else. 197 00:09:18,710 --> 00:09:20,919 But I do expect a very firm, 198 00:09:20,920 --> 00:09:23,239 hard, unofficial look 199 00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:26,319 into who the hell effed up my effigy! 200 00:09:26,320 --> 00:09:29,239 That's why you two are unofficially here! 201 00:09:29,240 --> 00:09:30,419 Is that clear? 202 00:09:30,420 --> 00:09:31,990 As Mother Teresa's urine test. 203 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:33,389 Ain't what I heard. 204 00:09:33,390 --> 00:09:35,259 Magnifico! 205 00:09:35,260 --> 00:09:38,139 No, no! 206 00:09:38,140 --> 00:09:43,460 I want it to look like the roots of a banyan tree. 207 00:09:48,820 --> 00:09:50,720 Sonny Shine? 208 00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:53,079 No sir-ee. 209 00:09:53,080 --> 00:09:54,919 Sorry, can't help you. 210 00:09:54,920 --> 00:09:57,339 I am not gonna say one word about him. 211 00:09:57,340 --> 00:09:58,619 "El zippo." 212 00:09:58,620 --> 00:10:01,799 We're investigating some serious crimes, Mr. Thorn. 213 00:10:01,800 --> 00:10:05,370 A child kidnapping ring, murder, extortion. 214 00:10:05,376 --> 00:10:07,720 Yeah, that sounds like Sonny. 215 00:10:08,830 --> 00:10:11,172 You two don't look like cops. 216 00:10:11,173 --> 00:10:12,179 We're undercover. 217 00:10:12,180 --> 00:10:14,100 Deep cover. 218 00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:16,740 I said it's deep, that's all. 219 00:10:18,470 --> 00:10:20,169 I can tell you want to talk to me, Doug. 220 00:10:20,170 --> 00:10:21,724 What are you afraid of? 221 00:10:21,725 --> 00:10:23,009 Me? 222 00:10:23,010 --> 00:10:24,435 Everything. 223 00:10:24,436 --> 00:10:26,509 Heights, spider plants, 224 00:10:26,510 --> 00:10:28,148 three-legged jeans. 225 00:10:28,149 --> 00:10:29,979 He's still got it. 226 00:10:29,980 --> 00:10:31,279 Oh, he's still got it, all right. 227 00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:33,020 I just hope you can't catch it. 228 00:10:33,028 --> 00:10:35,949 Listen, I can offer you police protection. 229 00:10:35,950 --> 00:10:37,689 A new identity. 230 00:10:37,690 --> 00:10:39,479 "New identity." That's a laugher. 231 00:10:39,480 --> 00:10:42,489 All I ever wanted was my old one back. 232 00:10:42,490 --> 00:10:45,165 The rat bastard stole everything from me. 233 00:10:47,900 --> 00:10:49,627 Yeah. 234 00:10:49,628 --> 00:10:51,838 Yeah, yeah. 235 00:10:53,240 --> 00:10:56,110 Sure isn't like the old days, is it? 236 00:10:56,120 --> 00:10:58,539 Not like when the "Dayglo Doug Power Hour" 237 00:10:58,540 --> 00:11:01,310 was the number one kid's local access show 238 00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:03,000 in the greater Toledo area. 239 00:11:03,920 --> 00:11:06,227 You were big, Doug. 240 00:11:06,228 --> 00:11:07,819 I was. 241 00:11:07,820 --> 00:11:09,689 I was big, wasn't I? 242 00:11:09,690 --> 00:11:12,189 Johnny "Wadd" Holmes big. 243 00:11:13,680 --> 00:11:16,840 Milton Berle big. 244 00:11:19,074 --> 00:11:23,429 ♪ Give me a home ♪ 245 00:11:23,430 --> 00:11:26,199 ♪ Where the buffalo roam ♪ 246 00:11:26,200 --> 00:11:31,579 ♪ And the deer and the antelope ♪ 247 00:11:31,580 --> 00:11:34,079 ♪ And seldom is heard ♪ 248 00:11:34,080 --> 00:11:37,019 Shh. 249 00:11:37,020 --> 00:11:39,239 ♪ A discouraging word ♪ 250 00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:42,379 You know, I was there to hear the great Caruso 251 00:11:42,380 --> 00:11:45,850 make his professional debut. 252 00:11:45,851 --> 00:11:49,659 Now I've got to listen to this shit. 253 00:11:49,660 --> 00:11:53,040 Do you not know the meaning of "solitary confinement"? 254 00:11:54,870 --> 00:11:57,019 It's meant to be just me in here! 255 00:11:57,020 --> 00:11:58,099 Mm. 256 00:11:58,100 --> 00:11:59,599 Perhaps you're confused... 257 00:11:59,600 --> 00:12:02,160 which seems to happen so very easily. 258 00:12:02,170 --> 00:12:03,919 So to elucidate, 259 00:12:03,920 --> 00:12:07,909 you are trapped in this prison. 260 00:12:07,910 --> 00:12:11,409 I am trapped in you. 261 00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:13,919 "Trapped"? 262 00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:16,049 Well, then, just... 263 00:12:16,050 --> 00:12:18,859 get out. 264 00:12:18,860 --> 00:12:21,844 I bequeath you freedom. 265 00:12:21,845 --> 00:12:24,129 Mm, if only. 266 00:12:24,130 --> 00:12:27,019 But even the demigods are constrained 267 00:12:27,020 --> 00:12:30,539 by certain earthly limitations. 268 00:12:30,540 --> 00:12:32,000 Bloodlines and all that. 269 00:12:32,020 --> 00:12:33,029 You know. 270 00:12:33,030 --> 00:12:37,139 I did try and hop into your charming sister. 271 00:12:37,140 --> 00:12:40,200 Much more fun body to play around in. 272 00:12:40,220 --> 00:12:43,509 Even came with its own television show. 273 00:12:43,510 --> 00:12:45,040 But we both know how 274 00:12:45,060 --> 00:12:47,719 that little harlequin art came to an end. 275 00:12:49,190 --> 00:12:52,079 This is madness! 276 00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:55,059 I gotta get out of here! 277 00:12:55,060 --> 00:12:57,740 It's not such a bad place for us, this. 278 00:12:57,760 --> 00:13:00,729 At least until I get my strength back. 279 00:13:00,730 --> 00:13:03,769 Pottery Shop. Fun. 280 00:13:03,770 --> 00:13:07,379 And all these impressionable, 281 00:13:07,380 --> 00:13:09,892 homicidal minds to sway. 282 00:13:11,980 --> 00:13:14,479 And as I get my strength back, 283 00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:16,619 you'll have more and more blackouts 284 00:13:16,620 --> 00:13:20,939 until life is one long, continuous blackout. 285 00:13:20,940 --> 00:13:23,449 Now, won't that be nice? 286 00:13:23,450 --> 00:13:27,519 No more waking up like a Kennedy, wondering... 287 00:13:27,520 --> 00:13:30,739 "Who did I sodomize? 288 00:13:30,740 --> 00:13:32,459 Whom did I kill?" 289 00:13:32,460 --> 00:13:34,040 And what'll happen then? 290 00:13:34,050 --> 00:13:37,079 By then, I'll have built an army. 291 00:13:37,080 --> 00:13:38,769 No. 292 00:13:38,770 --> 00:13:41,174 I meant what will happen to me. 293 00:13:41,175 --> 00:13:42,740 Oh. 294 00:13:51,950 --> 00:13:54,659 Uh, it's... it's a great surprise. 295 00:13:54,660 --> 00:13:57,049 Don't get me wrong, I like this new rebel Amanda. 296 00:13:57,050 --> 00:14:00,079 This "let's get crazy and ditch work, 297 00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:01,279 good girl gone bad" Amanda. 298 00:14:01,280 --> 00:14:05,029 You're joking, but honestly... 299 00:14:05,030 --> 00:14:06,999 I know me. 300 00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:09,529 And these days, I haven't felt like her at all. 301 00:14:09,530 --> 00:14:11,099 Mm. 302 00:14:11,100 --> 00:14:12,899 It's strange even talking about it. 303 00:14:12,900 --> 00:14:14,339 Not at all. 304 00:14:14,340 --> 00:14:17,469 Talking it out is the best way to deal with stress. 305 00:14:17,470 --> 00:14:20,019 That and a little hot yoga. 306 00:14:20,020 --> 00:14:23,000 I don't think hot yoga's gonna fix it. 307 00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:27,479 Ugh. I got fired, Simon. 308 00:14:27,480 --> 00:14:29,449 Seriously? 309 00:14:29,450 --> 00:14:31,000 That's great. 310 00:14:31,750 --> 00:14:32,819 Um... 311 00:14:32,820 --> 00:14:34,620 I was right out of college in Seattle 312 00:14:34,630 --> 00:14:36,379 when the first big dot-com boom hit. 313 00:14:36,380 --> 00:14:37,929 I found myself one of the first employees 314 00:14:37,930 --> 00:14:39,929 in a little books-in-the-mail startup. 315 00:14:39,930 --> 00:14:41,739 Amazon? Wow. 316 00:14:41,740 --> 00:14:44,400 No, it was EncyclopediasInTheMail.com. 317 00:14:45,520 --> 00:14:48,199 Free returns killed us. So six months later 318 00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:49,779 I'm broke, I'm unemployed. 319 00:14:49,780 --> 00:14:51,379 Living in my mother's basement. 320 00:14:51,380 --> 00:14:53,339 I was feeling sorry for myself. 321 00:14:53,340 --> 00:14:55,109 But it forced me to do a lot 322 00:14:55,110 --> 00:14:56,979 of soul-searching, Amanda, okay? 323 00:14:56,980 --> 00:14:59,499 To figure out what I really want in life. 324 00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:00,919 What's really important. 325 00:15:00,920 --> 00:15:02,889 I realized, for me, it's giving back. 326 00:15:02,890 --> 00:15:05,119 Making a difference. 327 00:15:05,120 --> 00:15:06,289 Boom. 328 00:15:06,290 --> 00:15:08,889 "Ties Without Borders" was born. 329 00:15:08,890 --> 00:15:10,429 Mm? 330 00:15:10,430 --> 00:15:12,460 You feel me? 331 00:15:15,030 --> 00:15:17,869 Every setback is an opportunity? 332 00:15:17,870 --> 00:15:19,839 To learn something about yourself. 333 00:15:19,840 --> 00:15:22,900 To bring something new into this world. 334 00:15:23,750 --> 00:15:26,539 Joseph Campbell said it best: 335 00:15:26,540 --> 00:15:28,079 "Follow your bliss." 336 00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:30,049 He should know. 337 00:15:30,050 --> 00:15:32,640 He invented frickin' "Star Wars." 338 00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:35,780 I like that. 339 00:15:36,890 --> 00:15:39,559 "Follow your bliss." 340 00:15:42,880 --> 00:15:45,919 Yes, yes, yes! 341 00:15:45,920 --> 00:15:47,959 Simon! Yes! 342 00:15:55,210 --> 00:15:56,859 You see that? 343 00:15:56,860 --> 00:16:00,009 Live long enough, there's your reward. 344 00:16:00,010 --> 00:16:01,990 Breaking a hip tripping over your oxygen tank 345 00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:03,509 just trying to get to your bedpan. 346 00:16:03,510 --> 00:16:05,979 Why don't more people know about this? 347 00:16:05,980 --> 00:16:08,540 How come they never showed it on "The Golden Girls"? 348 00:16:10,090 --> 00:16:13,299 Lesbian fairytale. 349 00:16:13,300 --> 00:16:16,620 They are talking to him right now. 350 00:16:16,630 --> 00:16:19,379 Of course, he wasn't "Sonny" back then. 351 00:16:19,380 --> 00:16:22,119 Yeah, he was... he was still "Louis Shineberg." 352 00:16:22,120 --> 00:16:25,219 He used to come to the show, sit in the audience. 353 00:16:25,220 --> 00:16:28,519 He was a superfan, if you know what I mean. 354 00:16:28,520 --> 00:16:30,259 _ 355 00:16:30,260 --> 00:16:33,029 I mean, it comes with the territory in my business. 356 00:16:33,030 --> 00:16:34,239 Don't get me wrong, 357 00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:38,290 I love my little Douglets, but after a certain point 358 00:16:38,300 --> 00:16:40,600 it gets, you know, a little bit... 359 00:16:41,040 --> 00:16:43,680 "Superfan-tastic"? 360 00:16:43,700 --> 00:16:45,639 Creepy. Skin-crawling. 361 00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:47,839 - Depressing? - Somewhat. 362 00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:49,160 Go on. 363 00:16:52,180 --> 00:16:55,439 Year after year, he'd show up. 364 00:16:55,440 --> 00:16:57,509 Most kids grew out of it. 365 00:16:57,510 --> 00:16:59,569 Not him. 366 00:16:59,570 --> 00:17:02,059 We made friends. Sort of. 367 00:17:02,060 --> 00:17:05,699 He said he wanted to be an entertainer, like me. 368 00:17:05,700 --> 00:17:08,140 - But it wasn't until... - Until what? 369 00:17:08,680 --> 00:17:11,519 You're gonna think I'm some kind of a nut job. 370 00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:14,290 We're the ones who are crazy, not you. 371 00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:16,300 Go ahead, dish. 372 00:17:17,040 --> 00:17:18,700 Those things... 373 00:17:19,730 --> 00:17:22,380 The Wishees. 374 00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:25,559 I still remember the first time he showed up with them. 375 00:17:25,560 --> 00:17:27,359 The costumes. 376 00:17:27,360 --> 00:17:30,470 The big round fish eyes. 377 00:17:30,480 --> 00:17:33,219 The "fuck me" mouths. 378 00:17:33,220 --> 00:17:36,719 Let's face it, Louis was just a schmuck 379 00:17:36,720 --> 00:17:39,380 until those candy-colored abominations came along. 380 00:17:39,400 --> 00:17:43,079 After that, everything changed for him. 381 00:17:43,080 --> 00:17:45,749 Suddenly, he just took... 382 00:17:45,750 --> 00:17:47,679 whatever he wanted to. 383 00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:50,439 Starting with my show. 384 00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:52,200 Oh, oh, question. 385 00:17:52,840 --> 00:17:55,169 Um, when these, uh, whatever you call them... 386 00:17:55,170 --> 00:17:56,780 - "Wishees," Nick. - Sax. 387 00:17:56,810 --> 00:17:59,109 Which I am to understand are basically, uh, 388 00:17:59,110 --> 00:18:01,149 shitheads in fuzzy outfits 389 00:18:01,150 --> 00:18:03,099 that dance around the stage with Mr. Shineberg... 390 00:18:03,100 --> 00:18:07,089 when they, as you say, "showed up"... 391 00:18:07,090 --> 00:18:09,959 are we saying, like... say, for example, 392 00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:11,940 from Cleveland? 393 00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:13,379 "Cleveland." 394 00:18:13,380 --> 00:18:15,740 - Cleveland, Ohio. - Yes. 395 00:18:16,300 --> 00:18:18,479 By way of the Crab Nebula, maybe. 396 00:18:18,480 --> 00:18:22,220 - Ah-ha. - And they weren't just guys in outfits. 397 00:18:23,540 --> 00:18:25,499 The big guy doesn't seem very bright, 398 00:18:25,500 --> 00:18:28,240 so I'm gonna try to make this as simple as I can. 399 00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:30,509 Back in the Etruscan age, 400 00:18:30,510 --> 00:18:33,669 this gigantic meteor crashes into Earth... 401 00:18:33,670 --> 00:18:35,679 All right, that's it. I'm done. 402 00:18:35,680 --> 00:18:37,899 - Enjoy your interrogation. - Where the fuck are you going? 403 00:18:37,900 --> 00:18:39,519 I'm simply famished, so I'm gonna find 404 00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:41,859 where they stashed those pudding cups or die trying. 405 00:18:41,860 --> 00:18:43,689 You, Trigger. 406 00:18:43,690 --> 00:18:45,480 I suggest you come along. 407 00:18:45,500 --> 00:18:48,930 - Your friend is a little... - I know. 408 00:18:50,370 --> 00:18:51,869 Keep talking. 409 00:19:04,810 --> 00:19:08,419 You. 410 00:19:08,420 --> 00:19:09,820 You know what they say: 411 00:19:09,840 --> 00:19:12,520 "Nothing makes you believe in Hell like Catholic school." 412 00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:15,289 No, wait! 413 00:19:15,290 --> 00:19:17,179 Wait, Hailey. 414 00:19:17,180 --> 00:19:18,320 I'm sorry. 415 00:19:18,330 --> 00:19:21,299 I am so, so sorry for everything that happened. 416 00:19:21,300 --> 00:19:23,299 - Get away from me. - Don't... don't run off, please. 417 00:19:23,300 --> 00:19:24,599 I'm not moving. See? 418 00:19:24,600 --> 00:19:26,729 I'll stay perfectly still. 419 00:19:26,730 --> 00:19:28,669 I wouldn't think of hurting you. 420 00:19:28,670 --> 00:19:30,239 It's... it's the opposite. 421 00:19:30,240 --> 00:19:32,100 I... I've been protecting you, haven't I? 422 00:19:32,870 --> 00:19:34,239 I'm just a boy... 423 00:19:34,240 --> 00:19:36,779 standing in front of a girl 424 00:19:36,780 --> 00:19:38,380 asking her to listen. 425 00:19:39,280 --> 00:19:41,019 I don't blame you for being scared. 426 00:19:41,020 --> 00:19:42,340 This can be very confusing. 427 00:19:43,890 --> 00:19:45,649 Should we sit? 428 00:19:45,650 --> 00:19:48,180 Would that be better? 429 00:19:49,300 --> 00:19:51,580 I see you've got your lucky keychain. 430 00:19:52,340 --> 00:19:54,039 Maybe you've been thinking about things. 431 00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:56,300 Questions you have for me. 432 00:19:56,900 --> 00:19:58,799 You're supposed to be dead. 433 00:19:58,800 --> 00:20:01,239 "Dead." 434 00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:02,440 Someone told you that? 435 00:20:03,770 --> 00:20:05,259 My parents. 436 00:20:05,260 --> 00:20:07,439 Ah, parents. 437 00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:10,760 They do like making up stories, don't they? 438 00:20:11,680 --> 00:20:13,409 Seems that... 439 00:20:13,410 --> 00:20:15,500 no one wants to tell you the truth these days. 440 00:20:18,390 --> 00:20:19,999 What happened to your eye? 441 00:20:25,760 --> 00:20:27,679 You're not the only one who knows what it's like 442 00:20:27,680 --> 00:20:28,900 to be bullied. 443 00:20:32,330 --> 00:20:35,740 What if I told you that I was forced to do what I did? 444 00:20:36,540 --> 00:20:39,769 There are very awful people in this world, Hailey, 445 00:20:39,770 --> 00:20:43,979 and they can make people do very awful things. 446 00:20:45,510 --> 00:20:48,449 Doesn't make it right, but it's the truth. 447 00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:51,419 I was happy 448 00:20:51,420 --> 00:20:54,719 when you children were saved by the police. 449 00:20:54,720 --> 00:20:56,619 Those very awful people? 450 00:20:56,620 --> 00:20:58,420 Not so much. 451 00:20:59,360 --> 00:21:01,819 As you can see. 452 00:21:03,970 --> 00:21:06,460 I'm sorry, I... I can put my glasses back on. 453 00:21:06,470 --> 00:21:09,539 So now we're supposed to be friends? 454 00:21:09,540 --> 00:21:10,960 I don't need friends. 455 00:21:12,910 --> 00:21:14,779 I do. 456 00:21:16,310 --> 00:21:17,879 But... 457 00:21:17,880 --> 00:21:20,349 if that's the way you feel... 458 00:21:20,350 --> 00:21:22,620 I'm just happy that you're finally hearing the truth. 459 00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:25,549 You've been lied to since the day you were born. 460 00:21:25,550 --> 00:21:26,959 It's about time someone finally... 461 00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:28,859 What's that supposed to mean? 462 00:21:30,630 --> 00:21:31,929 No, no. 463 00:21:31,930 --> 00:21:35,729 I'm not one to open up old wounds. 464 00:21:35,730 --> 00:21:38,160 But you do know the whole story? 465 00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:42,189 Your father lied to your mother and then ran out on her. 466 00:21:42,190 --> 00:21:44,890 And then your mother lied to your father about you, 467 00:21:44,900 --> 00:21:46,739 and then to you about your father. 468 00:21:46,740 --> 00:21:47,779 I'm not a shrink, 469 00:21:47,780 --> 00:21:50,579 but that is a rough place for any kid to start. 470 00:21:50,580 --> 00:21:53,240 I'm going. 471 00:21:55,320 --> 00:21:57,449 Wait! 472 00:21:58,590 --> 00:22:00,039 One last thing. 473 00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:02,019 When you get home and see your mother, 474 00:22:02,020 --> 00:22:03,659 tell her we met. 475 00:22:03,660 --> 00:22:06,629 Tell her what I said. Be honest with her. 476 00:22:06,630 --> 00:22:07,999 See what she says. 477 00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:09,599 And if you don't want to be friends, 478 00:22:09,600 --> 00:22:11,149 you will never see me again. 479 00:22:11,150 --> 00:22:12,769 But if you do, 480 00:22:12,770 --> 00:22:16,559 just say the word and I'll be right there. 481 00:22:30,060 --> 00:22:32,219 While others run in fear 482 00:22:32,220 --> 00:22:35,039 from those who've declared war for any on Easter, 483 00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:38,579 one man will unite us all... 484 00:22:38,580 --> 00:22:43,499 In bringing sexy back to Easter. 485 00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:52,049 This year, if we don't celebrate Easter, 486 00:22:52,050 --> 00:22:53,809 they win. 487 00:23:00,340 --> 00:23:01,779 Just a taste. 488 00:23:01,780 --> 00:23:04,399 A little, como se dice, flavor, 489 00:23:04,400 --> 00:23:05,940 if you will. 490 00:23:07,450 --> 00:23:10,279 This ain't your grandma's Easter, am I right? 491 00:23:12,370 --> 00:23:14,800 Well? Kap? 492 00:23:15,830 --> 00:23:17,659 What do you think? 493 00:23:19,710 --> 00:23:21,829 Go, Kap, go! 494 00:23:21,830 --> 00:23:24,089 Whoo-hoo! 495 00:23:28,070 --> 00:23:29,580 I think it's fucking brilliant. 496 00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:43,939 Oh, there she is! 497 00:23:43,940 --> 00:23:45,200 Who's hungry? 498 00:23:45,940 --> 00:23:47,139 If you'd told me one day 499 00:23:47,140 --> 00:23:50,259 I'd get to see Dayglo Doug up close and in person, 500 00:23:50,260 --> 00:23:52,099 tell the story of how he met Sonny Shine 501 00:23:52,100 --> 00:23:54,129 for the first time, well, I would have said, 502 00:23:54,130 --> 00:23:55,859 "Holy guacamole, somebody pinch me 503 00:23:55,860 --> 00:23:58,699 because this is a dream come true!" 504 00:23:58,700 --> 00:24:00,569 But it's not. 505 00:24:00,570 --> 00:24:02,740 Yeah, well, if it's any consolation, 506 00:24:02,750 --> 00:24:04,969 that look on your face of soul-crushing disappointment 507 00:24:04,970 --> 00:24:07,020 has been the highlight of this whole trip. 508 00:24:12,130 --> 00:24:14,179 Sieg Heil! 509 00:24:14,180 --> 00:24:17,019 Dickless freaking Doug. 510 00:24:17,020 --> 00:24:18,489 Some witness. 511 00:24:18,490 --> 00:24:20,990 That's what I get for trusting Mer. 512 00:24:22,980 --> 00:24:24,859 You should be the black one. 513 00:24:24,860 --> 00:24:26,929 I was black last time! 514 00:24:26,930 --> 00:24:29,199 I'm not a schwarzer! 515 00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:31,779 You be the schwarzer! 516 00:24:31,780 --> 00:24:33,369 Is that gonna be us someday, Nick? 517 00:24:33,370 --> 00:24:36,309 Frittering away our last days in a place like this, 518 00:24:36,310 --> 00:24:38,219 arguing over some silly game? 519 00:24:38,220 --> 00:24:39,499 Don't you worry about that, pal. 520 00:24:39,500 --> 00:24:41,339 I'll drink bleach before I let that happen. 521 00:24:41,340 --> 00:24:42,799 Besides, what are you worried about? 522 00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:44,760 You haven't even hit the magical "P-word" yet. 523 00:24:46,420 --> 00:24:48,149 "Puberty." 524 00:24:48,150 --> 00:24:50,419 It's Latin for "pubes." 525 00:24:50,420 --> 00:24:53,340 Six-year period where you part your hair down the middle 526 00:24:53,350 --> 00:24:56,080 and your body gets all awkward and, uh, pimply. 527 00:24:56,100 --> 00:24:58,439 At the same, it wants to get naked with other people. 528 00:24:58,440 --> 00:25:00,829 But what if I don't want to grow up? 529 00:25:00,830 --> 00:25:02,199 Well, then you're gonna have to file that one 530 00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:03,500 under "tough shit." 531 00:25:06,650 --> 00:25:07,999 Um... 532 00:25:13,840 --> 00:25:16,239 Have you noticed the staff here is funny? 533 00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:18,309 I mean, usually the people they hire in joints like this 534 00:25:18,310 --> 00:25:20,349 are, um... 535 00:25:20,350 --> 00:25:21,540 different. 536 00:25:22,150 --> 00:25:24,789 - "Different" how? - Dominican. 537 00:25:26,890 --> 00:25:28,799 Do you smell popcorn? 538 00:25:28,800 --> 00:25:30,340 Oh, hell yeah. 539 00:25:44,340 --> 00:25:46,539 Holy sheisse. 540 00:25:50,410 --> 00:25:52,419 Hey, Mer. 541 00:25:52,420 --> 00:25:54,939 Mer. Guess what? 542 00:25:54,940 --> 00:25:56,649 Turns out this place is a home for assholes. 543 00:25:56,650 --> 00:25:57,699 Excuse me? 544 00:25:57,700 --> 00:25:58,959 Go ahead, tell her. 545 00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:01,059 Some of the people here are a bit colorful. 546 00:26:01,060 --> 00:26:02,499 Yeah, red, white, and black. 547 00:26:02,500 --> 00:26:04,539 We saw the tape, der fuckward. 548 00:26:04,540 --> 00:26:06,919 Look, you know Sonny's M.O. I was set up. 549 00:26:06,920 --> 00:26:08,199 If the armband fits. 550 00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:10,129 I am a history buff. 551 00:26:10,130 --> 00:26:13,299 A collector of rare and exotic memorabilia. 552 00:26:13,300 --> 00:26:15,929 I don't belong here with these fascists. 553 00:26:15,930 --> 00:26:17,719 Okay, can someone please explain to me 554 00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:19,939 - what the hell is going on? - Nazis, Mer. 555 00:26:19,940 --> 00:26:21,689 The place is stinking with them. 556 00:26:21,690 --> 00:26:24,419 It wasn't enough that he stole my show. 557 00:26:24,420 --> 00:26:27,019 Then he has to twist the knife. 558 00:26:27,020 --> 00:26:28,939 You know, Sonny used to say 559 00:26:28,940 --> 00:26:30,049 that the shortest book ever written 560 00:26:30,050 --> 00:26:31,889 was the German book of humor? 561 00:26:31,890 --> 00:26:34,569 That's why he stuck me here! 562 00:26:34,570 --> 00:26:37,389 Don't you think I'd leave if I could? 563 00:26:37,390 --> 00:26:40,479 I've been bombing in front of this Stasi scum 564 00:26:40,480 --> 00:26:41,679 for a decade. 565 00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:45,119 I mean, you gotta get me out of this place! 566 00:26:45,120 --> 00:26:47,869 ♪ I can't take another bad review ♪ 567 00:26:47,870 --> 00:26:49,289 - We're going, come on. - No, no, no. 568 00:26:49,290 --> 00:26:50,539 We're not actually taking this guy. 569 00:26:50,540 --> 00:26:52,459 You said you would protect me if I talked. 570 00:26:52,460 --> 00:26:54,079 This adult-diaper-wearing war criminal 571 00:26:54,080 --> 00:26:55,349 is not getting in my cab. 572 00:26:55,350 --> 00:26:57,869 Hey, I resemble that last remark. 573 00:26:57,870 --> 00:26:58,879 Hey. 574 00:26:58,880 --> 00:27:01,049 I'm not doing this with you right now. 575 00:27:01,050 --> 00:27:03,759 What is it about this guy? 576 00:27:05,390 --> 00:27:08,959 Visiting time, sadly, is over. 577 00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:11,889 So we're gonna have to ask you to leave. 578 00:27:13,610 --> 00:27:15,729 It's time for your pills. 579 00:27:15,730 --> 00:27:17,929 We have some more questions to ask him off-site. 580 00:27:17,930 --> 00:27:18,940 I'm sure you understand. 581 00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:21,069 I don't think so. 582 00:27:24,770 --> 00:27:26,940 You eye-fucking me, Nietzsche? 583 00:27:28,450 --> 00:27:30,479 Uh, Nick? 584 00:27:36,120 --> 00:27:38,259 Is there a problem, young man? 585 00:27:38,260 --> 00:27:40,469 Nothing we can't handle, Herr Zimmer. 586 00:27:40,470 --> 00:27:41,839 - Oh, boy. - You! 587 00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,299 Where do you think you're slinking off to? 588 00:27:44,300 --> 00:27:46,999 You have a show in 20 minutes. 589 00:27:58,440 --> 00:28:00,450 Sieg Heil! 590 00:28:00,460 --> 00:28:02,860 Sieg Heil! 591 00:28:02,880 --> 00:28:05,120 Sieg Heil! 592 00:28:05,140 --> 00:28:07,160 Sieg Heil! 593 00:28:07,180 --> 00:28:09,050 Sieg Heil! 594 00:28:12,020 --> 00:28:14,300 Well, actually, the show starts now. 595 00:28:15,020 --> 00:28:16,879 Blitzkrieg! 596 00:28:21,930 --> 00:28:24,299 All right, NYPD! Nobody move! 597 00:28:24,300 --> 00:28:25,920 Shit. 598 00:28:28,000 --> 00:28:29,349 Fuck! 599 00:28:29,350 --> 00:28:31,600 Doug! 600 00:28:43,610 --> 00:28:45,529 Nick! 601 00:28:52,300 --> 00:28:53,919 That's my witness. 602 00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:57,369 Lookit, Mer! 603 00:28:57,370 --> 00:28:59,360 His bones are so brittle! 604 00:29:10,380 --> 00:29:12,389 Ah! 605 00:29:16,400 --> 00:29:18,109 Sax, stop killing people! 606 00:29:18,110 --> 00:29:20,609 Ah, come on, Mer! They're Nazis! 607 00:29:29,420 --> 00:29:31,449 Ouch-witz! 608 00:30:01,030 --> 00:30:03,569 Papa never loved me. 609 00:30:09,040 --> 00:30:11,100 Auf Wiedersehen, motherfucker. 610 00:30:14,700 --> 00:30:18,480 "Greatest generation" my ass. 611 00:30:34,640 --> 00:30:36,139 Oh, my God. 612 00:30:36,140 --> 00:30:38,189 Look at what they did to you. 613 00:30:38,190 --> 00:30:40,399 Get off of me! Get off of me! 614 00:30:40,400 --> 00:30:42,119 Fuck! 615 00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:44,100 Get off of me! 616 00:30:48,840 --> 00:30:50,040 Is it true? 617 00:30:51,130 --> 00:30:52,580 What? 618 00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:55,440 You killed all them Russians in the toilet. 619 00:30:57,320 --> 00:30:58,579 What if it is? 620 00:31:05,840 --> 00:31:07,949 It's like... 621 00:31:07,950 --> 00:31:10,929 It's like you're two different people. 622 00:31:10,930 --> 00:31:13,479 One's warm and loving. 623 00:31:13,480 --> 00:31:15,149 The other's just... 624 00:31:15,150 --> 00:31:16,469 cold and cruel. 625 00:31:16,470 --> 00:31:18,659 No! No! 626 00:31:18,660 --> 00:31:20,519 Don't say that! 627 00:31:20,520 --> 00:31:22,419 I'm not two different people! 628 00:31:22,420 --> 00:31:25,159 It's just me, and I am... 629 00:31:25,160 --> 00:31:27,200 I'm Blue! 630 00:31:28,070 --> 00:31:30,529 I'm Blue! 631 00:31:30,530 --> 00:31:33,139 Orcus. 632 00:31:33,140 --> 00:31:35,440 This is... 633 00:31:35,940 --> 00:31:38,670 Ow. 634 00:31:41,050 --> 00:31:42,880 I'm sorry. 635 00:31:45,950 --> 00:31:47,420 I'm sorry. 636 00:31:49,990 --> 00:31:54,220 You've been so kind to me, and, um... 637 00:31:55,360 --> 00:31:57,000 I've spurned you. 638 00:31:57,900 --> 00:31:59,499 You haven't, though. 639 00:31:59,500 --> 00:32:02,169 I mean, "spurned." 640 00:32:02,170 --> 00:32:04,800 - No, I spurned you. - You really haven't. 641 00:32:06,970 --> 00:32:10,039 I've treated you unkindly, and... 642 00:32:10,040 --> 00:32:13,109 I'm just... 643 00:32:13,110 --> 00:32:14,820 I'm scared, Pink. 644 00:32:15,980 --> 00:32:18,400 I need you tell me that... 645 00:32:21,050 --> 00:32:22,960 That it's me, right? 646 00:32:23,520 --> 00:32:25,759 I'm Blue Scaramucci. 647 00:32:25,760 --> 00:32:29,459 T-tell me I'm Blue Scaramucci. 648 00:32:29,460 --> 00:32:32,020 Yeah. It's you. 649 00:32:33,800 --> 00:32:35,779 That's right. 650 00:32:35,780 --> 00:32:37,939 You're Blue. 651 00:32:37,940 --> 00:32:40,100 You're Blue Scaramucci. 652 00:32:48,650 --> 00:32:51,699 Oh, you nasty little tart. 653 00:32:51,700 --> 00:32:52,739 Go on. 654 00:32:52,740 --> 00:32:55,420 Oh, tell me, tell me. 655 00:32:57,400 --> 00:32:59,719 Who am I? 656 00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:05,629 ♪ Ooh, Sunny ♪ 657 00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:10,029 ♪ Ooh, Sunny Shine ♪ 658 00:33:10,030 --> 00:33:11,379 ♪ Ooh ♪ 659 00:33:13,170 --> 00:33:17,389 Sock it to me! 660 00:33:19,430 --> 00:33:20,700 Dad, look here! 661 00:33:22,230 --> 00:33:25,300 Dad, look! 662 00:33:25,820 --> 00:33:28,789 It's Sonny Shine's original shiny mic! 663 00:33:28,790 --> 00:33:31,559 I don't know how "original" it is. 664 00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:33,359 It says on the thing! 665 00:33:33,360 --> 00:33:35,339 I mean, when I was growing up 666 00:33:35,340 --> 00:33:37,699 it was the "Dayglo Doug Power Hour." 667 00:33:37,700 --> 00:33:41,110 All this stuff is from that show. 668 00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:43,499 I'm sure you can still find the old clips online. 669 00:33:43,500 --> 00:33:45,749 Who likes selfies? 670 00:33:45,750 --> 00:33:47,369 Oh, my God! 671 00:33:47,370 --> 00:33:49,319 Let's do this! Let's do this. 672 00:33:49,320 --> 00:33:50,809 Come on. Gather around, everyone. 673 00:33:50,810 --> 00:33:53,079 Give that to me. Okay, here we are. 674 00:33:53,080 --> 00:33:54,549 Everybody say, 675 00:33:54,550 --> 00:33:57,929 "Sonny Shine Easter Live Bonanza Extravaganza 676 00:33:57,930 --> 00:34:00,219 With Tony Danza!" 677 00:34:01,720 --> 00:34:03,819 All right, all right, y'all better get going. 678 00:34:03,820 --> 00:34:07,059 The Wishee exhibit closes in 20 minutes for fumigation. 679 00:34:07,060 --> 00:34:08,839 Remember, when you post those: 680 00:34:08,840 --> 00:34:11,500 #SonnyEaster. 681 00:34:12,060 --> 00:34:14,460 Make Easter great again! 682 00:34:15,100 --> 00:34:17,260 And a MEGA day to you, too. 683 00:34:28,620 --> 00:34:32,759 So the procedure is for a root canal on Saturday. 684 00:34:32,760 --> 00:34:35,549 And the payment's been made? 685 00:34:35,550 --> 00:34:37,379 - Hailey? - Hi, Dr. Reddy. 686 00:34:37,380 --> 00:34:39,099 I need to tell my mother something. 687 00:34:39,100 --> 00:34:41,129 It's important. 688 00:34:41,130 --> 00:34:43,340 Hailey, your mother doesn't work here anymore. 689 00:34:43,930 --> 00:34:45,729 But... 690 00:34:45,730 --> 00:34:47,599 since when? 691 00:34:47,600 --> 00:34:49,599 A few days ago. 692 00:34:49,600 --> 00:34:52,069 Sorry, I thought she would have told you. 693 00:34:53,610 --> 00:34:56,139 Lollipop? 694 00:35:03,780 --> 00:35:05,749 It's... 695 00:35:05,750 --> 00:35:07,079 fantastic. 696 00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:09,100 I knew you'd love it. 697 00:35:09,110 --> 00:35:12,639 It's like a 3D version of the inside of my brain. 698 00:35:12,640 --> 00:35:13,990 I know, right? 699 00:35:14,000 --> 00:35:15,799 You really are on the level. 700 00:35:15,800 --> 00:35:18,459 You said they weren't guys in suits. 701 00:35:18,460 --> 00:35:20,669 I... I'm afraid to ask, but... 702 00:35:20,670 --> 00:35:22,719 what exactly did you mean by that? 703 00:35:22,720 --> 00:35:25,860 Afraid to ask, or afraid of the answer? 704 00:35:26,740 --> 00:35:29,300 You ever talk to one of them face to face? 705 00:35:29,340 --> 00:35:31,019 Oh, uh, no. 706 00:35:31,020 --> 00:35:32,729 See, about that... they don't speak. 707 00:35:32,730 --> 00:35:34,319 What do you mean? 708 00:35:34,320 --> 00:35:35,920 I mean, they don't speak. 709 00:35:36,610 --> 00:35:39,239 Like Helen Keller or like a mime? 710 00:35:39,240 --> 00:35:40,519 No, no, no. 711 00:35:40,520 --> 00:35:43,119 No, they communicate through telepathy. 712 00:35:43,120 --> 00:35:45,859 - Of course. - Uh, only Sonny can hear them. 713 00:35:45,860 --> 00:35:49,459 They speak, it goes straight into his brain. 714 00:35:49,460 --> 00:35:51,419 Don't think it would work so well for you, but... 715 00:35:51,420 --> 00:35:53,539 I'm gonna be in the kitchen. 716 00:35:53,540 --> 00:35:56,500 If you got tinfoil, I can make Doug a new hat. 717 00:35:58,880 --> 00:36:00,819 Who'd believe a guy with a smile like that 718 00:36:00,820 --> 00:36:02,540 could be so evil? 719 00:36:04,680 --> 00:36:06,909 What, that Mr. Pussy Pants is a bad guy? 720 00:36:06,910 --> 00:36:09,919 - Welcome to the party. - I couldn't believe it. 721 00:36:09,920 --> 00:36:12,749 Me and Hailey used to... 722 00:36:12,750 --> 00:36:15,059 But I guess that's all over now. 723 00:36:15,060 --> 00:36:16,599 It's like you said, Nick. 724 00:36:16,600 --> 00:36:19,159 People change. Everything changes. 725 00:36:19,160 --> 00:36:21,340 Uh, that's right. That goes for me, too. 726 00:36:21,930 --> 00:36:24,099 Try and knock me off the... 727 00:36:24,100 --> 00:36:26,499 Try and knock me off the wagon. 728 00:36:26,500 --> 00:36:27,909 Will of iron, pal. 729 00:36:27,910 --> 00:36:29,999 She ain't gonna be happy 730 00:36:30,000 --> 00:36:32,399 until I've broken every promise to Amanda and the kid. 731 00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:34,469 And for what, huh? 732 00:36:34,470 --> 00:36:36,519 On a wild goose chase 733 00:36:36,520 --> 00:36:39,199 with some incontinent Kraut-dog 734 00:36:39,200 --> 00:36:41,589 who thinks Sasquatch killed Biggie. 735 00:36:41,590 --> 00:36:43,720 What are we gonna do, Nick? 736 00:36:45,350 --> 00:36:47,539 Well, for now, I'm gonna get this jelly open. 737 00:36:47,540 --> 00:36:49,919 I mean about Sunny and... and the Wishees. 738 00:36:49,920 --> 00:36:52,179 Doug says... 739 00:36:52,180 --> 00:36:53,689 Let me tell you something. 740 00:36:53,690 --> 00:36:56,519 Being a grown-up means you've gotta learn 741 00:36:56,520 --> 00:36:59,499 that heroism comes in a lot of different forms, 742 00:36:59,500 --> 00:37:02,769 one of them being not being a hero. 743 00:37:02,770 --> 00:37:04,199 Capische? 744 00:37:04,200 --> 00:37:06,900 Nick, you don't really believe that. 745 00:37:11,120 --> 00:37:12,639 This is what I believe in. 746 00:37:12,640 --> 00:37:14,779 Being there for that kid. 747 00:37:14,780 --> 00:37:17,399 Trying to give her some kind of normal life 748 00:37:17,400 --> 00:37:18,999 after everything she has been through. 749 00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:22,259 And, you know, we got too many freaks in leotards 750 00:37:22,260 --> 00:37:25,019 in our lives for my taste. 751 00:37:25,020 --> 00:37:26,680 Fuck them all. 752 00:37:27,930 --> 00:37:29,219 I killed it. 753 00:37:31,750 --> 00:37:32,759 I know I did. 754 00:37:32,760 --> 00:37:34,439 Nothing bleeds that much and walks away. 755 00:37:34,440 --> 00:37:37,299 But when I went back, it was gone. 756 00:37:37,300 --> 00:37:39,119 Something moved the body. 757 00:37:39,120 --> 00:37:41,499 I had a feeling the place would be wiped clean 758 00:37:41,500 --> 00:37:43,940 before forensics got there. What they don't know 759 00:37:43,960 --> 00:37:47,699 is I took some of whatever it was 760 00:37:47,700 --> 00:37:49,379 that came out of that thing. 761 00:37:49,380 --> 00:37:51,719 You have its blood? Where is it? 762 00:37:51,720 --> 00:37:55,319 Well, I had it in here under a lamp. 763 00:37:55,320 --> 00:37:57,879 Then it started moving, like it was trying to get out. 764 00:37:57,880 --> 00:38:00,379 No, no, no. You're supposed to keep it cold. 765 00:38:00,380 --> 00:38:01,659 I figured that. 766 00:38:01,660 --> 00:38:04,169 I put it in a jelly jar, I stuck it in the fridge. 767 00:38:09,470 --> 00:38:11,919 Oh, man, I needed that. 768 00:38:11,920 --> 00:38:14,079 I tell you I got a blood sugar thing? 769 00:38:36,460 --> 00:38:38,940 Sweet boneless Jesus. 770 00:38:43,840 --> 00:38:46,199 This is Captain Turdwell. 771 00:38:46,200 --> 00:38:48,939 We are experiencing uncontrollable explosive thrust 772 00:38:48,940 --> 00:38:50,069 in both engines! 773 00:38:50,070 --> 00:38:52,379 Prepare for water landing! 774 00:38:52,380 --> 00:38:54,579 How about a courtesy flush? 775 00:38:57,920 --> 00:38:59,679 Whoo! 776 00:39:10,680 --> 00:39:12,099 Ow! 777 00:39:27,020 --> 00:39:29,139 Sax! 778 00:39:32,350 --> 00:39:35,229 Go back to hell! 779 00:40:18,960 --> 00:40:22,869 You must be Rin Tin Tikki Tavi 780 00:40:22,870 --> 00:40:24,719 walking in here. 781 00:40:24,720 --> 00:40:26,499 If I can forgive you 782 00:40:26,500 --> 00:40:28,939 sending six of your chums in to kill me, 783 00:40:28,940 --> 00:40:31,209 then surely... 784 00:40:31,210 --> 00:40:32,609 surely... 785 00:40:32,610 --> 00:40:35,159 you can forgive me for merely... 786 00:40:35,160 --> 00:40:37,160 drowning them all in the toilet. 787 00:40:38,260 --> 00:40:41,149 Besides, I'm here to make you an offer 788 00:40:41,150 --> 00:40:45,400 that you simply cannot refuse. 789 00:40:46,320 --> 00:40:49,790 There are those that would give their right hand 790 00:40:49,800 --> 00:40:51,320 to work with me. 791 00:40:51,330 --> 00:40:54,699 Just because you talk like Liam Neeson... 792 00:40:56,200 --> 00:40:58,729 This does not make you Liam Neeson. 793 00:41:00,400 --> 00:41:03,020 In ages past, it was customary 794 00:41:03,040 --> 00:41:05,849 to sacrifice black sheep in my name. 795 00:41:05,850 --> 00:41:07,769 And then... 796 00:41:07,770 --> 00:41:10,349 should make a lovely, big pot of stew. 797 00:41:10,350 --> 00:41:12,479 Not unlike this one. 798 00:41:19,690 --> 00:41:22,070 _ 799 00:41:24,320 --> 00:41:26,780 _ 800 00:41:28,030 --> 00:41:29,700 _ 801 00:41:30,830 --> 00:41:33,360 _ 802 00:41:34,140 --> 00:41:35,960 _ 803 00:41:37,050 --> 00:41:38,859 Maybe you young pioneers 804 00:41:38,860 --> 00:41:40,619 are more familiar with the Bible 805 00:41:40,620 --> 00:41:42,779 than you are with the Roman texts. 806 00:41:44,580 --> 00:41:46,249 Yeah? 807 00:41:46,250 --> 00:41:49,449 For example... 808 00:41:49,450 --> 00:41:52,349 "He who fails to find me 809 00:41:52,350 --> 00:41:54,949 injures himself." 810 00:41:56,360 --> 00:41:58,040 The fuck? 811 00:41:59,330 --> 00:42:02,729 "And if your hand should cause you to sin... " 812 00:42:04,670 --> 00:42:06,769 "Cut it off. 813 00:42:06,770 --> 00:42:08,840 Throw it away." 814 00:42:14,580 --> 00:42:16,719 And what is that other verse? 815 00:42:16,720 --> 00:42:17,929 Oh, yes. 816 00:42:17,930 --> 00:42:20,349 "Beware of the dogs, 817 00:42:20,350 --> 00:42:23,019 "beware of the evil workers... " 818 00:42:25,310 --> 00:42:29,349 "And beware of false circumcision." 819 00:42:36,140 --> 00:42:38,359 _ 820 00:42:40,400 --> 00:42:42,259 _ 821 00:42:42,260 --> 00:42:45,519 Now, here's the Bible almost repeating itself, 822 00:42:45,520 --> 00:42:48,890 but not quite, and the difference is crucial. 823 00:42:48,900 --> 00:42:52,580 "If your eye... causes you to sin... " 824 00:42:53,520 --> 00:42:55,929 Eat shit, demon! 825 00:42:55,930 --> 00:42:57,249 "Tear it out. 826 00:42:57,250 --> 00:42:58,879 Throw it away." 827 00:43:04,100 --> 00:43:07,939 I am so taken by you guys. 828 00:43:07,940 --> 00:43:09,469 I really, really am. 829 00:43:09,470 --> 00:43:10,689 I walked in here 830 00:43:10,690 --> 00:43:12,019 and immediately I'm saying to myself, 831 00:43:12,020 --> 00:43:13,299 "Oh, yes, yes. 832 00:43:13,300 --> 00:43:16,739 Here are some proper nasty boys." 833 00:43:16,740 --> 00:43:20,059 My name is Orcus. 834 00:43:21,880 --> 00:43:23,980 Orcus. 835 00:43:29,120 --> 00:43:30,619 Anything? 836 00:43:30,620 --> 00:43:32,979 Uh, as far as the residents go, 837 00:43:32,980 --> 00:43:35,120 they're practically dead to begin with. 838 00:43:36,090 --> 00:43:37,850 Well... 839 00:43:37,860 --> 00:43:40,760 We're nowhere on who took the tape collection. 840 00:43:43,630 --> 00:43:46,849 But I think I might have a bead... 841 00:43:46,850 --> 00:43:49,309 on who took Dayglo Doug. 842 00:43:49,310 --> 00:43:52,609 A terrorist? 843 00:43:52,610 --> 00:43:54,809 Shine's gonna want to see this. 844 00:44:45,430 --> 00:44:47,860 Mm. 845 00:44:53,480 --> 00:44:54,590 Mom? 846 00:44:54,600 --> 00:44:55,790 Oh. 847 00:44:55,800 --> 00:44:57,409 Hi, sweetheart. 848 00:44:57,410 --> 00:44:59,500 You're home a little late. 849 00:45:00,740 --> 00:45:03,540 Yeah, work was kind of a madhouse. 850 00:45:06,280 --> 00:45:08,499 It's the busiest time of the year down at the clinic. 851 00:45:08,500 --> 00:45:09,639 Few months after Valentine's. 852 00:45:09,640 --> 00:45:12,389 Now, how was your day? 853 00:45:12,390 --> 00:45:14,440 How was school? 854 00:45:18,540 --> 00:45:20,819 Make any new friends? 855 00:45:23,070 --> 00:45:25,469 Maybe one. 856 00:45:28,120 --> 00:45:33,120 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - -- www.addic7ed.com -- 57384

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