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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:15,000 Created and Encoded by -- Bokutox -- of www.YIFY-TORRENTS.com. The Best 720p/1080p/3d movies with the lowest file size on the internet. 2 00:00:44,487 --> 00:00:48,110 MAN: (SINGING) I'm just a penny on the train track 3 00:00:48,111 --> 00:00:50,694 Waiting for my judgment day 4 00:00:51,235 --> 00:00:54,443 Come on, baby girl, let me see those legs 5 00:00:54,568 --> 00:00:57,233 Before I get flattened away 6 00:00:57,692 --> 00:00:59,442 I wait 7 00:01:01,107 --> 00:01:03,065 Yeah, I wait 8 00:01:04,481 --> 00:01:09,272 For something good, for something great 9 00:01:11,521 --> 00:01:14,729 Stopping in somebody's old home town 10 00:01:14,812 --> 00:01:17,894 Gotta get that midnight meal 11 00:01:18,269 --> 00:01:21,518 If you can't get behind your own life 12 00:01:21,601 --> 00:01:24,517 Get behind the driving wheel 13 00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:29,598 And go, just go 14 00:01:32,098 --> 00:01:36,264 Find a place that you don't know 15 00:01:38,846 --> 00:01:41,762 Ran into a friend just the other night 16 00:01:41,887 --> 00:01:44,386 Got a badge, he's a local cop 17 00:01:45,386 --> 00:01:48,427 Haven't seen that boy in over seven years 18 00:01:48,552 --> 00:01:51,426 Since out of high school I dropped 19 00:01:51,509 --> 00:01:57,133 I see, I see 20 00:01:59,090 --> 00:02:03,839 All the things that I should be 21 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:26,416 (ALARM CLOCK BEEPING) 22 00:02:26,499 --> 00:02:28,707 I wait 23 00:02:28,832 --> 00:02:30,290 Yeah, I wait 24 00:02:32,247 --> 00:02:36,870 For something good, for something great 25 00:02:39,744 --> 00:02:41,452 Dude! You're totally missing it! 26 00:02:41,744 --> 00:02:45,077 It's fucking crazy here, man! Dude! Kev. 27 00:02:45,201 --> 00:02:47,410 I've got an idea. I want you to drop what you are doing. 28 00:02:47,534 --> 00:02:52,033 I want you to come down here and take a picture of this for the paper! 29 00:02:52,116 --> 00:02:55,907 (LAUGHING) Now that, my friend, is front page material. Lateski. 30 00:03:01,446 --> 00:03:03,154 Hey, Mom! Gina, Morris and I are gonna leave 31 00:03:03,238 --> 00:03:05,071 for Fieldmont right after school today. 32 00:03:05,154 --> 00:03:08,361 Honey, I completely forgot about that. Can you do it next weekend? 33 00:03:08,444 --> 00:03:12,151 Derek was gonna take me into the city tomorrow night for dinner. 34 00:03:12,235 --> 00:03:14,360 - God! It's already 7:00? - KEVIN: We can't. 35 00:03:14,442 --> 00:03:17,025 Morris has a scholarship meeting and we're signed up for the campus tour. 36 00:03:17,109 --> 00:03:19,400 - Carter. - Hi. What's up Ms. B? 37 00:03:21,191 --> 00:03:25,439 Dude, she totally threw off my groove! I was almost at the top level. 38 00:03:26,064 --> 00:03:27,314 - Hey, Carter. - What's up, man? 39 00:03:27,398 --> 00:03:29,438 What's up, little people? 40 00:03:31,980 --> 00:03:33,396 Running a little bit low. 41 00:03:33,479 --> 00:03:35,353 Kev! Can I ask you a question? 42 00:03:35,436 --> 00:03:38,477 You know that book that Miss Dangle makes everybody read about the mice? 43 00:03:38,561 --> 00:03:41,726 - You mean Of Mice and Men? - Bingo! That's the one, yeah. 44 00:03:41,852 --> 00:03:43,309 So let me get this straight. 45 00:03:43,393 --> 00:03:47,808 These two dudes dream of buying a farm together to raise rabbits? 46 00:03:48,558 --> 00:03:50,015 Hmm. 47 00:03:50,099 --> 00:03:53,723 And I'm no expert, but doesn't that seem a little... 48 00:03:53,848 --> 00:03:57,847 I don't know. Kind of G-A-Y? 49 00:03:58,264 --> 00:03:59,721 Dude, I think you're kind of missing the point. 50 00:03:59,805 --> 00:04:02,720 - We can spell, Carter. - Yeah, dumb A-S-S. 51 00:04:03,679 --> 00:04:05,469 Dude. Satan's children, I swear. Spawn of Satan. 52 00:04:05,553 --> 00:04:06,885 (CAR HORN HONKING) 53 00:04:09,968 --> 00:04:13,384 Right. Come on, guys! Mrs. Seavers is here. Let's go! 54 00:04:14,716 --> 00:04:16,591 Grab your backpacks. 55 00:04:24,297 --> 00:04:25,256 Oh, yeah! 56 00:04:25,380 --> 00:04:26,713 All right, see you guys! 57 00:04:32,003 --> 00:04:34,002 (SCHOOL BELL RINGING) 58 00:04:36,377 --> 00:04:39,376 Would you look at this guy? Why do we have to hang out with him? 59 00:04:39,459 --> 00:04:40,834 - Hey, Morris. - Hey, guys. 60 00:04:40,917 --> 00:04:43,500 Hey, Morris, what's up with all the geek books? 61 00:04:43,625 --> 00:04:45,499 I've got a scholarship interview in a day, Carter. 62 00:04:45,582 --> 00:04:47,666 And my parents are up my ass about it. 63 00:04:47,790 --> 00:04:49,832 Morris, your parents are always up your ass. 64 00:04:49,957 --> 00:04:52,580 Besides, don't you want to go to some fancy-shmancy Ivy League school? 65 00:04:52,705 --> 00:04:54,663 Guys, come on! Do we really have to start this early? 66 00:04:54,746 --> 00:04:56,496 Well, apparently, it's not my choice, Carter. 67 00:04:56,621 --> 00:04:58,495 At least Kevin will be there. Right, Kev? 68 00:04:58,578 --> 00:05:01,370 Yep. Hey, did you grab your stuff so we can split right after school today? 69 00:05:01,453 --> 00:05:03,244 Yeah. It's in my... 70 00:05:10,575 --> 00:05:13,866 Yeah, the technique was a little off, but the timing was better. 71 00:05:13,949 --> 00:05:15,199 And by the way, she's easy, 72 00:05:15,324 --> 00:05:19,156 but not in the, like, I'm-gonna-fuck-Morris kind of way easy. 73 00:05:19,989 --> 00:05:21,406 Come on, Kev, I've got to pee. I need you to shake it. 74 00:05:21,531 --> 00:05:22,613 Carter. 75 00:05:27,028 --> 00:05:29,112 You sure you don't wanna come with us this weekend, man? 76 00:05:29,195 --> 00:05:31,319 What? There's no reason for him to come. 77 00:05:31,444 --> 00:05:35,651 You know what, Morris? I think, for the first time, you and I are on the same page. 78 00:05:35,776 --> 00:05:38,067 I don't know. Campus tours and scholarship interviews, 79 00:05:38,192 --> 00:05:39,650 sounds like a real blastie-blast. 80 00:05:39,733 --> 00:05:42,983 But I think I'd rather sock myself in the nuts. 81 00:05:43,066 --> 00:05:44,357 I mean, seriously, look at this thing. 82 00:05:44,440 --> 00:05:47,356 Like, where are all the hotties, you know? Show some skin. 83 00:05:47,439 --> 00:05:48,855 - Hey. - Hey! 84 00:05:49,939 --> 00:05:51,854 - Hey, Gina. - Hey, Gina. 85 00:05:52,479 --> 00:05:55,312 Kevin, really, just... Listen, don't take this the wrong way. 86 00:05:55,396 --> 00:05:58,436 But I need to talk to your friend outside, alone. 87 00:05:58,520 --> 00:06:00,185 (LAUGHS) Nice! Does that mean you're gonna 88 00:06:00,310 --> 00:06:02,810 blow him underneath the bleachers? 89 00:06:04,559 --> 00:06:06,184 Yeah. That's exactly what I'm gonna do. 90 00:06:06,309 --> 00:06:08,975 Awesome! You kids have fun! High five! 91 00:06:12,307 --> 00:06:13,431 I got my high five, dude. 92 00:06:13,515 --> 00:06:14,931 Does he give you a high five like that? 93 00:06:15,014 --> 00:06:16,514 See you... 94 00:06:16,639 --> 00:06:18,888 Here's your brochure, though. Have a good weekend. 95 00:06:20,513 --> 00:06:21,887 Miami? 96 00:06:23,263 --> 00:06:26,469 - When did you apply there? - A couple months ago. 97 00:06:27,053 --> 00:06:28,135 KEVIN: What about us? 98 00:06:28,261 --> 00:06:29,927 I mean, what about our plans to go to Fieldmont together? 99 00:06:30,010 --> 00:06:32,301 And the campus tour this weekend? 100 00:06:32,385 --> 00:06:34,217 Just go without me. 101 00:06:35,509 --> 00:06:39,216 Look, it's senior year. 102 00:06:40,340 --> 00:06:45,130 It's, like, so exciting, and I wanna party, and I wanna have fun. 103 00:06:45,214 --> 00:06:49,004 And you're, like, not fun. 104 00:06:51,462 --> 00:06:55,419 Like, so what? So I don't drink very much, you know. We still have fun. 105 00:06:55,503 --> 00:06:57,293 Like our Friday nights at mini golf. 106 00:06:57,377 --> 00:06:58,710 Yeah, they're kind of boring. 107 00:06:58,834 --> 00:07:01,459 Our camping trips, the school carnival, studying together? 108 00:07:01,584 --> 00:07:04,625 Standing around while you're taking pictures of everything? 109 00:07:04,750 --> 00:07:06,666 - Thrilling! - Gina... 110 00:07:06,791 --> 00:07:08,165 When we were freshmen, it was one thing. 111 00:07:08,249 --> 00:07:12,747 But this is our time to really go crazy! We're supposed to be partying. 112 00:07:12,830 --> 00:07:15,996 And you, you're just... You're a loser! 113 00:07:18,704 --> 00:07:20,411 Kevin, it's over. 114 00:07:20,912 --> 00:07:25,619 College is just around the corner, and I can't let you ruin my senior year. 115 00:07:28,201 --> 00:07:29,700 That's mine. 116 00:07:30,284 --> 00:07:32,492 CARTER: Okay, so let me get this straight. 117 00:07:32,908 --> 00:07:36,366 You didn't get blown under the bleachers? 118 00:07:36,491 --> 00:07:39,989 No! Dude, have you been listening to me? She dumped me! 119 00:07:40,114 --> 00:07:42,113 I was dumped once. 120 00:07:42,197 --> 00:07:44,072 Morris, you're such a fucking liar, dude. 121 00:07:44,155 --> 00:07:46,946 - You've never even had a girlfriend. - Shut up, Carter. Yes, I did. 122 00:07:47,071 --> 00:07:48,986 Remember, Kev? You introduced me to her. 123 00:07:49,070 --> 00:07:50,237 - Right. - MORRIS: She was real. 124 00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:53,902 - We went to physics camp together. - Maybe more like fantasy camp. 125 00:07:53,985 --> 00:07:56,360 Come on, you guys. Do you mind? I'm having a breakdown here. 126 00:07:56,485 --> 00:07:57,818 What am I supposed to do now? 127 00:07:57,901 --> 00:08:00,234 It was all set. First, we'd go to college together, 128 00:08:00,317 --> 00:08:03,565 and then we'd get married, have a couple kids, one girl, one boy. 129 00:08:03,649 --> 00:08:07,190 Dude, is that the kind of shit you would say to Gina? 130 00:08:07,315 --> 00:08:10,272 God! No wonder she dumped your ass. You're fucking lame. 131 00:08:10,939 --> 00:08:13,687 - What's up, fellows? - What's up, Fletcher? 132 00:08:14,729 --> 00:08:15,895 What's up with Negative Nancy over here? 133 00:08:15,978 --> 00:08:17,853 Gina dumped him. He's having a breakdown. 134 00:08:17,978 --> 00:08:21,811 Cool. So are you guys going on some sort of road trip to Fieldmont this weekend? 135 00:08:21,936 --> 00:08:24,227 - I don't think I'm going anymore. - That's too bad. 136 00:08:24,309 --> 00:08:26,850 I just went there last weekend to visit my bro. 137 00:08:26,975 --> 00:08:28,017 I almost didn't make it back. 138 00:08:28,142 --> 00:08:30,891 "Almost didn't make it back"? Dude, it's just college. 139 00:08:30,974 --> 00:08:33,224 Yeah, yeah, just college. Yeah, see, that's what I thought, too. 140 00:08:33,307 --> 00:08:35,765 And then I went, and I'm telling you guys right now, 141 00:08:35,848 --> 00:08:39,180 it is fucking nuts, man. It's retarded. 142 00:08:39,888 --> 00:08:41,805 Why? What happened? 143 00:08:41,888 --> 00:08:43,929 You guys want to know? 144 00:08:44,845 --> 00:08:46,886 Basically, this is how it went down. 145 00:08:46,969 --> 00:08:48,552 I didn't sleep for three days, okay? 146 00:08:48,636 --> 00:08:50,010 I don't have any money left in my bank account. 147 00:08:50,135 --> 00:08:51,260 I maxed out my parents' credit card, 148 00:08:51,384 --> 00:08:53,426 which was only supposed to be used in case of an emergency. 149 00:08:53,510 --> 00:08:55,592 I lost my cell phone, which is actually my dad's cell phone. 150 00:08:55,675 --> 00:08:57,300 So he's pissed about that and the credit card. 151 00:08:57,425 --> 00:09:00,548 I tried smoking a tampon, which I thought was a big fat joint. 152 00:09:00,632 --> 00:09:03,381 Still got high. Stole a car, got in a bar fight, ate some goldfish. 153 00:09:03,465 --> 00:09:06,005 Played naked Frisbee, did some whip-its, wet my brother's bed twice. 154 00:09:06,130 --> 00:09:07,089 Shit my pants, once, 155 00:09:07,214 --> 00:09:09,796 but please don't tell anyone, 'cause I'm kind of embarrassed about that. 156 00:09:09,921 --> 00:09:13,628 Saw two girls make out. With tongue! With tongue! 157 00:09:13,795 --> 00:09:16,044 Watched my brother's roommates eat as many cheeseburgers as they could 158 00:09:16,127 --> 00:09:17,127 until one of them puked. 159 00:09:17,252 --> 00:09:19,126 Found a tattoo on my lower back of a unicorn. 160 00:09:19,851 --> 00:09:20,851 Don't remember getting that. 161 00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:22,892 Figure I'll just tell people it's some sort of killer unicorn. 162 00:09:23,017 --> 00:09:24,184 You know? So it doesn't seem so gay. 163 00:09:24,308 --> 00:09:26,849 I laughed. I cried. Fell in love. 164 00:09:27,599 --> 00:09:30,890 Yeah, and did I mention earlier that I got laid? 165 00:09:31,015 --> 00:09:33,847 Three times. Different girls, yeah. 166 00:09:33,931 --> 00:09:38,013 So all in all, I'd say it was pretty much the best weekend of my fucking life. 167 00:09:38,137 --> 00:09:39,304 Yeah. 168 00:09:40,137 --> 00:09:42,011 Dude, you should go. 169 00:09:44,386 --> 00:09:47,635 What if I could have a weekend like that, a weekend like Fletcher's? 170 00:09:47,718 --> 00:09:51,134 How? No way. Who knows if he's even telling the truth? 171 00:09:51,259 --> 00:09:53,342 Come on, man. What if he was? You heard him. 172 00:09:53,425 --> 00:09:58,298 All the craziness, the partying, the sex, the drinking, it sounds incredible. 173 00:09:59,507 --> 00:10:01,506 You know, maybe I'll even get a tattoo. 174 00:10:01,589 --> 00:10:04,338 Wait, you're joking, right? 175 00:10:04,672 --> 00:10:09,295 You got me, Kev. That's a good one. Partying, drinking, sex. Up top. 176 00:10:09,379 --> 00:10:13,336 I'm not kidding, Morris. You know, maybe Gina's right, I'm no fun. 177 00:10:13,461 --> 00:10:15,794 A weekend like Fletcher's is exactly what I need. 178 00:10:15,877 --> 00:10:19,792 Kev, having some crazy weekend to get back at Gina is a really bad idea. 179 00:10:19,875 --> 00:10:22,874 Or a really good idea, and I say go for it. 180 00:10:26,207 --> 00:10:27,415 Bitch. 181 00:10:28,289 --> 00:10:29,289 You know what? I'm gonna go for it. 182 00:10:29,373 --> 00:10:31,248 In fact, I'm gonna have a better weekend than Fletcher. 183 00:10:31,372 --> 00:10:32,497 Yes! 184 00:10:32,622 --> 00:10:34,038 (LAUGHS MOCKINGLY) 185 00:10:34,121 --> 00:10:35,163 (BLOWING RASPBERRY) 186 00:10:35,287 --> 00:10:36,496 Dude, I am so going. 187 00:10:37,037 --> 00:10:39,869 MAN: (SINGING) I gotta move 188 00:10:39,953 --> 00:10:44,035 While the streets ahead are sunny 189 00:10:44,160 --> 00:10:49,367 Fall in love with some honey Oh, mama 190 00:10:49,784 --> 00:10:53,199 I gotta move 191 00:10:55,281 --> 00:10:59,905 It's time I broke out into the open 192 00:11:00,030 --> 00:11:02,780 You know I'll settle down again some day 193 00:11:02,863 --> 00:11:05,362 Dude, this is definitely better than the brochure! 194 00:11:05,445 --> 00:11:07,237 KEVIN: Yeah, man, I've got a good feeling about this. 195 00:11:07,362 --> 00:11:08,444 Good feeling? What kind of good feeling? 196 00:11:08,528 --> 00:11:10,361 Like your-boy-Carter's-gonna-get-laid kind of feeling? 197 00:11:10,486 --> 00:11:12,902 'Cause I have that feeling too, and I love it! 198 00:11:13,026 --> 00:11:15,442 I don't know, man, just everything. I'm ready to have fun. 199 00:11:15,526 --> 00:11:18,067 Yeah, man, good! Positive vibes. Positive vibes. 200 00:11:18,192 --> 00:11:22,607 Okay, Kev, it says here that the campus tour is at 12:30 tomorrow afternoon. 201 00:11:22,690 --> 00:11:26,773 And there's a pre-frosh reception tonight before dinner in the main... 202 00:11:26,855 --> 00:11:29,271 Okay, that's enough! That is enough. No more. 203 00:11:29,355 --> 00:11:30,396 That's our schedule for the weekend! 204 00:11:30,522 --> 00:11:33,978 Dude, Morris, fuck schedules, man! We're in college now. 205 00:11:34,062 --> 00:11:35,853 You know what that means? 206 00:11:35,978 --> 00:11:39,685 No parents! No curfew! Free fucking beer! 207 00:11:39,811 --> 00:11:42,684 It does not get any better than this! 208 00:11:43,601 --> 00:11:46,475 Except for that. Dude, slow down, slow down. 209 00:11:46,558 --> 00:11:48,641 Hey, what's up, ladies? You on your way to class? 210 00:11:48,724 --> 00:11:51,140 No. We just like carrying all these books around for fun. 211 00:11:51,224 --> 00:11:55,181 (LAUGHING) Right! A girl's got to read, huh? Awesome. 212 00:11:55,264 --> 00:11:58,180 So, look, we're in town for the weekend, and we were just kind of wondering 213 00:11:58,305 --> 00:12:00,596 if you guys could, I mean, I don't know, show us around? 214 00:12:00,679 --> 00:12:03,012 New guys, huh? What college are you visiting from? 215 00:12:03,095 --> 00:12:05,511 No, no, see, we're not in college. 216 00:12:05,636 --> 00:12:09,052 - We're actually still in high school. - CARTER: What the fuck? 217 00:12:09,177 --> 00:12:10,301 - I hate you so much! - Stop it! 218 00:12:10,426 --> 00:12:11,967 You're crushing my testicles! 219 00:12:12,051 --> 00:12:14,592 - What my friend meant to say was... - Fuck off! 220 00:12:14,674 --> 00:12:17,466 All righty then. I'll see you guys later. 221 00:12:17,549 --> 00:12:20,798 Hey, green shirt, if I give you $5 right now, 222 00:12:20,923 --> 00:12:23,631 would you fart in a can and let me just keep it in my bedroom? 223 00:12:23,756 --> 00:12:25,505 I'll never open it! I promise. 224 00:12:28,712 --> 00:12:31,669 These dorms are whack. Why do we have to stay here? 225 00:12:31,795 --> 00:12:33,087 You don't have to, Carter. 226 00:12:33,169 --> 00:12:36,169 This is where the admissions board put me and Kevin. 227 00:12:36,251 --> 00:12:39,251 Look, I got a cousin who's a legacy in one of the fraternities. 228 00:12:39,334 --> 00:12:41,250 I'm sure if we go there, they'll hook us up. 229 00:12:41,334 --> 00:12:44,208 - Yeah, my parents would love that. - Yeah. 230 00:12:44,333 --> 00:12:48,539 Enough, you guys! Look, I don't see what's so bad about this, Carter. 231 00:12:49,248 --> 00:12:50,456 (MAN MOANING) 232 00:12:51,830 --> 00:12:53,413 (WHIPPING ON TV) 233 00:12:55,662 --> 00:12:56,996 - What? - ALL: God! 234 00:12:58,329 --> 00:12:59,411 (WOMAN MOANING ON TV) 235 00:12:59,495 --> 00:13:01,036 - Hi. - Hey, there. 236 00:13:01,161 --> 00:13:02,286 I'm Morris. 237 00:13:03,161 --> 00:13:06,326 I'm Kevin, Kevin Brewer, prospective freshman. 238 00:13:06,451 --> 00:13:08,950 We're supposed to be staying in your room this weekend. 239 00:13:09,034 --> 00:13:10,492 Right. 240 00:13:11,949 --> 00:13:15,823 Look, fellows, I'm gonna need about 20, 30 minutes to finish up here, okay? 241 00:13:15,907 --> 00:13:18,073 So just come back later. 242 00:13:22,488 --> 00:13:23,738 Probably just working out. 243 00:13:23,821 --> 00:13:26,695 Yeah, he's just working out one of these. 244 00:13:30,444 --> 00:13:32,235 - Disgusting! - How's that frat house sound, guys? 245 00:13:32,319 --> 00:13:33,443 Pretty good? Awesome. 246 00:13:39,900 --> 00:13:41,566 KEVIN: Okay, dude, do you actually know where you're going? 247 00:13:41,650 --> 00:13:44,732 Dude, relax! It's right up here, I think. 248 00:13:45,440 --> 00:13:46,689 All right, dude, I'm not perfect, all right? 249 00:13:46,814 --> 00:13:48,439 All these Greek letters look the same to me. 250 00:13:48,564 --> 00:13:50,147 Maybe we should go back and try the dorm again. 251 00:13:50,271 --> 00:13:52,771 You shut your mouth! Shut your mouth! 252 00:13:52,896 --> 00:13:54,103 Or not. That's cool, too. 253 00:13:59,644 --> 00:14:04,225 Holy shit. Those chicks definitely weren't in the brochure. 254 00:14:04,309 --> 00:14:05,934 - Hey, guys. - Hey. 255 00:14:06,808 --> 00:14:08,891 - What's up, college girls? - Ladies. 256 00:14:08,974 --> 00:14:11,599 - I'm Morris. - Hi, Morris. 257 00:14:12,307 --> 00:14:16,139 - She said my name. - Chicks are smoking hot! Yeah. 258 00:14:18,305 --> 00:14:21,887 "Chicks are smoking hot"? Come on, real smooth, Carter. 259 00:14:24,386 --> 00:14:25,802 Yeah. Smooth. 260 00:14:25,886 --> 00:14:27,427 Whatever! All you got out was your name. 261 00:14:27,552 --> 00:14:29,093 Which she repeated back to me, I'd like to note. 262 00:14:29,218 --> 00:14:30,177 Shut up. 263 00:14:34,342 --> 00:14:35,300 (PELLET GUN FIRES) 264 00:14:35,425 --> 00:14:36,425 Jesus! 265 00:14:36,507 --> 00:14:38,674 - Nut shot. - Ten points! 266 00:14:38,798 --> 00:14:40,090 Get some. 267 00:14:40,590 --> 00:14:42,465 Shitty news, dudes. 268 00:14:43,464 --> 00:14:47,254 Dean Chandler has denied our petition, and we're still on probation. 269 00:14:47,338 --> 00:14:48,504 Shit! 270 00:14:48,962 --> 00:14:52,587 I guess he's taking that whole singing thing pretty seriously. 271 00:14:52,711 --> 00:14:54,544 Looking good, Goose. 272 00:14:54,628 --> 00:14:58,043 Looks like we got another semester without any pledges. 273 00:14:58,126 --> 00:15:00,001 This fucking blows, man! 274 00:15:00,126 --> 00:15:03,625 What's the point of college if you can't have pledges? 275 00:15:03,750 --> 00:15:04,917 Shit! 276 00:15:06,299 --> 00:15:07,299 (PELLET GUN FIRING) 277 00:15:07,424 --> 00:15:08,590 Fuck! 278 00:15:10,340 --> 00:15:11,464 MAN: Fuck! 279 00:15:14,005 --> 00:15:15,463 Son of a... 280 00:15:18,587 --> 00:15:21,003 That's it. This just might be the year to graduate. 281 00:15:21,086 --> 00:15:22,212 - What? - What? 282 00:15:22,294 --> 00:15:24,127 - No. - Yeah, I didn't think it'd come so soon. 283 00:15:24,252 --> 00:15:26,876 You can't graduate. You're Bearcat. 284 00:15:27,001 --> 00:15:28,959 - You're an institution. - I know. 285 00:15:29,084 --> 00:15:31,042 I'm scared to graduate. 286 00:15:31,167 --> 00:15:34,374 It seems like torturing pledges, that's all I'm good at. 287 00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,749 That's not true, and you know that. 288 00:15:36,873 --> 00:15:41,122 You're good at a lot of things. Cooper, tell him what he's good at. 289 00:15:42,247 --> 00:15:45,996 Like... Like the keg toss. 290 00:15:47,245 --> 00:15:49,203 And you take the biggest dumps in the house. Right? 291 00:15:49,286 --> 00:15:53,036 Yeah. Nobody beats you at that. It's like a real gift. 292 00:15:53,118 --> 00:15:56,659 It is, isn't it? Thanks, guys. I feel a lot better. 293 00:15:57,576 --> 00:15:59,700 - Hang in there, big guy. - You're all right. 294 00:15:59,825 --> 00:16:01,366 Hang in there. 295 00:16:05,823 --> 00:16:09,198 We'll figure this whole pledge thing out, I promise. 296 00:16:21,693 --> 00:16:24,359 Hey, man, is this the Beta Phi house? 297 00:16:24,485 --> 00:16:26,692 What? You can't read Greek? 298 00:16:26,817 --> 00:16:28,858 My cousin is a legacy here. 299 00:16:28,941 --> 00:16:31,274 - Yeah? Who's your cousin? - Toby Scott. 300 00:16:31,399 --> 00:16:32,940 You mean Queef? 301 00:16:34,398 --> 00:16:35,981 - What? - Queef. 302 00:16:36,814 --> 00:16:39,230 - What's a queef? - A pussy fart. 303 00:16:39,980 --> 00:16:41,563 It's his pledge name. 304 00:16:41,687 --> 00:16:44,187 - Who'd want that name? - Yeah, he earned it. 305 00:16:44,312 --> 00:16:49,102 I'd like to help you guys out, with you being his cousin and everything, but... 306 00:16:50,685 --> 00:16:51,851 Hey! Wait, wait, wait, wait! 307 00:16:51,934 --> 00:16:54,517 Come on, man. Look, we're in high school, you know? 308 00:16:54,642 --> 00:16:57,683 We're just up here to party, you know? Is that too much to ask? 309 00:16:57,767 --> 00:17:01,182 You guys are a bunch of high school kids? Yeah, yeah, yeah. 310 00:17:01,265 --> 00:17:03,473 No, okay? Go try the dorms. 311 00:17:07,014 --> 00:17:09,512 - A legacy, dude? - Yeah, he's... I... 312 00:17:09,637 --> 00:17:12,678 I can't believe they call Toby "Queef." Toby kicks ass. 313 00:17:15,719 --> 00:17:16,844 What did those guys want? 314 00:17:16,927 --> 00:17:21,176 A couple of high school kids looking to crash here for the weekend. 315 00:17:21,717 --> 00:17:24,133 One of them was Queef's cousin. Remember him? 316 00:17:24,216 --> 00:17:28,424 God, that guy could toss a salad. That thing he did with his tongue? 317 00:17:29,423 --> 00:17:31,590 Sorry. That guy's a loser. 318 00:17:31,715 --> 00:17:34,838 So, they're looking for a place to crash, huh? 319 00:17:36,921 --> 00:17:39,545 - Maybe we should let them stay. - COOPER: What, are you serious? 320 00:17:39,670 --> 00:17:40,670 What the hell are we gonna do with a bunch 321 00:17:40,795 --> 00:17:43,711 of fucking high school kids here all weekend? 322 00:17:46,460 --> 00:17:48,792 TEAGUE: Brothers. MAN: Do it, man! 323 00:17:49,293 --> 00:17:51,292 - Listen up. - Boner. 324 00:17:51,375 --> 00:17:53,458 Goose, shut the fuck up. 325 00:17:54,124 --> 00:17:55,291 (MEN LAUGHING) 326 00:17:56,041 --> 00:17:58,373 These guys. What's your names? 327 00:17:58,956 --> 00:18:00,789 I'm Kevin, and this is Morris and Carter. 328 00:18:00,873 --> 00:18:03,496 Okay, whatever. These guys are our guests for the weekend. 329 00:18:03,622 --> 00:18:04,830 (ALL CHEERING) 330 00:18:04,954 --> 00:18:07,829 Well, see, technically, we're supposed to stay in the dorms, 331 00:18:07,913 --> 00:18:09,953 but our roommate's a little... 332 00:18:10,037 --> 00:18:11,328 - MAN: Technically, you're a fag! ...preoccupied. 333 00:18:11,411 --> 00:18:12,869 Yeah, he's jerking off. 334 00:18:12,952 --> 00:18:15,660 Pussy! Fuck hole! Did we say you could talk? 335 00:18:15,784 --> 00:18:19,575 Bearcat! Relax, big man. They didn't mean anything by it. 336 00:18:21,491 --> 00:18:24,365 Sorry. He's got anger management issues. 337 00:18:24,449 --> 00:18:26,365 How about I show you guys where you are staying? 338 00:18:26,489 --> 00:18:27,865 Put your stuff away? 339 00:18:27,948 --> 00:18:29,655 - Morris, do you like the sound of that? - MAN: Party! 340 00:18:29,780 --> 00:18:31,988 - ALL: Party! Party! Party! - Party! Party! Party! 341 00:18:32,071 --> 00:18:34,155 - Party! Party! Party! - Party! Party! Party! 342 00:18:34,237 --> 00:18:36,279 - Party! Party! Party! - Party! Party! Party! 343 00:18:36,362 --> 00:18:38,153 - Party! Party! Party! - Party! Party! Party! 344 00:18:39,111 --> 00:18:40,236 What's up, shit face? 345 00:18:40,360 --> 00:18:43,193 This is usually where we let our pledges stay. 346 00:18:43,319 --> 00:18:48,317 We call this room the dungeon, but don't let the name scare you. 347 00:18:49,858 --> 00:18:51,733 You're gonna love it. 348 00:18:55,690 --> 00:18:56,981 (CRASHING) 349 00:18:57,355 --> 00:18:58,938 COOPER: Watch the step. 350 00:19:16,058 --> 00:19:18,183 Yeah, this place fucking sucks. 351 00:19:18,308 --> 00:19:20,640 Dude, it beats some guy jerking, all right? 352 00:19:20,724 --> 00:19:24,056 Like we said, all of our guest rooms are taken tonight. 353 00:19:24,182 --> 00:19:27,264 Yeah. We feel really bad about having to put you guys down here. 354 00:19:27,347 --> 00:19:30,888 - Is that a rat? - A rat? No. Probably just a shadow. 355 00:19:31,013 --> 00:19:32,596 And don't you guys worry. 356 00:19:32,679 --> 00:19:35,595 We're gonna give you the 411 on all the great parties this weekend. 357 00:19:35,678 --> 00:19:40,093 In fact, I think that the Lambdas are having a kegger tonight. 358 00:19:40,177 --> 00:19:42,676 Keggers? We love keggers. Right, Kev? Keggers, keggers! 359 00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:44,176 We are all about keggers. 360 00:19:44,301 --> 00:19:47,591 Cool. Well, you guys are gonna love the Lambdas. 361 00:19:53,423 --> 00:19:54,714 COOPER: Bearcat! 362 00:19:57,172 --> 00:19:59,129 - What the fuck is up with that... - BEARCAT: Are you talking? 363 00:19:59,254 --> 00:20:02,795 - No, man. I'm chilling. What? - Yeah. Shut the fuck up. 364 00:20:07,169 --> 00:20:08,626 So excited! 365 00:20:08,710 --> 00:20:12,375 All right, guys. This is it. Party time. 366 00:20:13,167 --> 00:20:15,374 Let's do the rundown. Rubbers? 367 00:20:16,499 --> 00:20:17,665 Check. 368 00:20:17,790 --> 00:20:19,457 Breath mints? 369 00:20:22,955 --> 00:20:24,247 Check. 370 00:20:24,330 --> 00:20:25,705 Retainers? 371 00:20:26,663 --> 00:20:27,829 (GROANS) 372 00:20:29,120 --> 00:20:32,619 I was kidding. That's so fucking gross. Put that away. 373 00:20:33,744 --> 00:20:38,367 - So, you guys sure about this? - Relax, man. It's just a frat party. 374 00:20:38,909 --> 00:20:40,409 What? 375 00:20:40,492 --> 00:20:42,907 What? We're here to learn about college, right? 376 00:20:43,191 --> 00:20:45,482 God, I love the new attitude, Kevin. It looks good on you, man. 377 00:20:45,565 --> 00:20:47,315 It makes your eyes pop and your hair shine. 378 00:20:47,398 --> 00:20:51,105 It makes your shirt look better. Good times. Good times. All right, guys. 379 00:20:51,189 --> 00:20:55,146 Hold onto your socks, because this is going to be awesome. 380 00:20:56,604 --> 00:20:57,646 (DANCE MUSIC PLAYING) 381 00:20:57,729 --> 00:21:01,102 Hey, guys! Come on in! The kegs are full and the Jacuzzi's hot! 382 00:21:01,186 --> 00:21:02,311 Yeah! 383 00:21:02,977 --> 00:21:04,143 Party! 384 00:21:04,726 --> 00:21:05,893 Yeah! 385 00:21:07,184 --> 00:21:11,016 What's up? Going on? Ladies? 386 00:21:15,681 --> 00:21:17,514 There's a lot of dudes here, right? 387 00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:20,056 Yeah. It's a total sausage fest. 388 00:21:21,888 --> 00:21:22,846 Check it out! 389 00:21:22,971 --> 00:21:26,470 These guys are so drunk they're making out with each other. 390 00:21:26,595 --> 00:21:27,969 Morris, I don't think they're drunk. 391 00:21:28,053 --> 00:21:30,427 Who wants to play glow-in-the-dark boners now? 392 00:21:30,511 --> 00:21:31,511 (CROWD CHEERING) 393 00:21:31,636 --> 00:21:34,176 It's boner tag! It's boner tag! 394 00:21:35,051 --> 00:21:36,176 (EXCLAIMING IN DISGUST) 395 00:21:41,341 --> 00:21:45,423 Why would they send us to an all-gay fraternity? Do we look gay? 396 00:21:45,507 --> 00:21:49,838 Maybe they found out how many times you've been laid and just assumed. 397 00:21:49,963 --> 00:21:51,129 Real funny, Carter. 398 00:21:51,213 --> 00:21:55,836 Look, my cousin's a legacy. I doubt they're gonna do that to us on purpose. 399 00:21:56,836 --> 00:22:00,543 Don't worry! That was not full of my piss or anything. 400 00:22:01,876 --> 00:22:03,584 Just Bearcat's. 401 00:22:03,667 --> 00:22:04,792 MAN: Yeah! 402 00:22:04,875 --> 00:22:07,625 Hey, how was the party? Did you guys find any dates? 403 00:22:07,708 --> 00:22:09,665 Yeah, real funny, guys. We almost got jumped back there. 404 00:22:09,790 --> 00:22:12,790 Watch your step, pre-frosh! This ain't high school! 405 00:22:12,915 --> 00:22:15,622 Welcome to college, boys. Enjoy. 406 00:22:18,497 --> 00:22:19,496 Crap. 407 00:22:20,871 --> 00:22:23,703 MAN: (SINGING) Don't talk about it 408 00:22:23,828 --> 00:22:27,702 Oh, boy, don't talk about it 409 00:22:27,827 --> 00:22:31,659 If you do, I'll die 410 00:22:39,073 --> 00:22:40,948 Holy shit! This is insane! 411 00:22:41,031 --> 00:22:43,781 No, man. This is fucking college. 412 00:22:44,197 --> 00:22:45,447 (IMPLANTS SQUISHING) 413 00:22:47,362 --> 00:22:49,987 God bless America for such a place! 414 00:22:50,987 --> 00:22:52,903 Let's rock this bitch. 415 00:22:57,818 --> 00:22:59,485 (GLASS SHATTERING) 416 00:23:01,317 --> 00:23:04,150 Hey! Hey! Hey! What's up, fellows? 417 00:23:04,816 --> 00:23:08,814 Look, we feel like absolute shit for what happened earlier. 418 00:23:08,939 --> 00:23:13,314 - Yeah. We think you guys are cool. - Yeah. It was just a joke. 419 00:23:13,397 --> 00:23:16,645 We weren't trying to be like assholes or anything. 420 00:23:17,312 --> 00:23:18,312 Let us make it up to you. 421 00:23:18,437 --> 00:23:19,853 We're gonna go do some body shots. 422 00:23:19,978 --> 00:23:23,102 And we would love it if you guys would come with us. 423 00:23:23,186 --> 00:23:24,643 Dude, we are so down! 424 00:23:24,769 --> 00:23:27,268 Actually, you know what? I just filled up, so I'm cool. 425 00:23:27,392 --> 00:23:30,100 Yeah, I think I'm gonna take a pass, too. 426 00:23:30,184 --> 00:23:31,141 (SCOFFS) 427 00:23:31,266 --> 00:23:33,766 Lame and lamer. 428 00:23:35,890 --> 00:23:38,889 Just saying, man, I guess Gina was right. 429 00:23:41,638 --> 00:23:43,013 Dude, where's the bathroom? 430 00:23:43,138 --> 00:23:46,636 All right. All right, you know what? Fuck it! I'm in. 431 00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:51,094 - COOPER: Bottle. - This is awesome. 432 00:23:56,509 --> 00:23:57,759 Salt. 433 00:24:00,924 --> 00:24:02,132 Limes. 434 00:24:05,298 --> 00:24:06,672 And lube. 435 00:24:08,380 --> 00:24:09,880 - What the hell is that for? - TEAGUE: Just in case. 436 00:24:09,963 --> 00:24:14,587 We probably won't need it. You guys... You guys are gonna love this. 437 00:24:14,712 --> 00:24:16,669 Where did the girls go? 438 00:24:16,794 --> 00:24:17,753 Unfortunately, 439 00:24:17,836 --> 00:24:18,960 (GRUNTS) 440 00:24:19,085 --> 00:24:20,501 the girls had to go home early. 441 00:24:21,835 --> 00:24:24,626 So who are we doing body shots off of? 442 00:24:24,751 --> 00:24:27,750 - Great question, Mike. - Morris. 443 00:24:27,875 --> 00:24:31,249 Bearcat was nice enough to take their place. 444 00:24:31,332 --> 00:24:32,790 Bearcat? 445 00:24:35,748 --> 00:24:36,747 MAN: Yeah! 446 00:24:37,130 --> 00:24:38,255 (GROANS) 447 00:24:41,921 --> 00:24:43,754 (ROARING) 448 00:24:48,752 --> 00:24:50,044 (ALL CHEERING) 449 00:24:50,918 --> 00:24:52,751 That's right, motherfuckers! 450 00:24:52,876 --> 00:24:54,791 - Okay, we're outta here, let's go. - Yeah. 451 00:24:54,917 --> 00:24:56,083 Where are you guys going? 452 00:24:56,208 --> 00:25:00,498 Yeah, we thought you guys were cool. We thought you wanted to party. 453 00:25:00,582 --> 00:25:02,332 Guess we were wrong. 454 00:25:02,414 --> 00:25:06,206 Well, have fun back at the dorm, you fucking pussies. 455 00:25:12,828 --> 00:25:14,744 (FRAT BOYS CHANTING) 456 00:25:19,826 --> 00:25:21,700 (ALL CHEERING) 457 00:25:39,237 --> 00:25:40,737 (FRAT BOYS CHANTING) 458 00:26:00,272 --> 00:26:02,605 - ALL: Do it! Do it! Do it! - Do it! Do it! Do it! 459 00:26:02,730 --> 00:26:05,062 - Do it! Do it! Do it! - Do it! Do it! Do it! 460 00:26:05,188 --> 00:26:07,645 - Do it! Do it! Do it! - Do it! Do it! Do it! 461 00:26:08,228 --> 00:26:09,561 - MAN: Do that shot! - Yeah! 462 00:26:09,686 --> 00:26:11,186 MAN: Do that shot! Do it! 463 00:26:14,934 --> 00:26:16,393 Watch this! 464 00:26:30,222 --> 00:26:32,096 You are my best friend! 465 00:26:32,221 --> 00:26:34,763 MAN: (SINGING) All the girls and the boys And people making noise 466 00:26:34,888 --> 00:26:36,012 Just let me hear you shout 467 00:26:36,137 --> 00:26:37,845 Bring them out Bring them out 468 00:26:37,928 --> 00:26:40,594 Everything's spinning around me. I'm drunk right now. 469 00:26:40,719 --> 00:26:44,176 Doing shots of tequila out of some guy's ass crack will do that to you. 470 00:26:44,301 --> 00:26:46,759 Whatever, man. You guys are lightweights. I don't feel shit! 471 00:26:46,884 --> 00:26:48,467 Is that a fat joke, you bitch? 472 00:26:48,550 --> 00:26:50,466 - Here! Video me! - Okay. 473 00:26:52,257 --> 00:26:55,214 Yeah, wait till Gina sees this! Party! 474 00:26:55,339 --> 00:26:57,589 (ALL CHEERING) 475 00:27:00,330 --> 00:27:02,287 Party! 476 00:27:08,410 --> 00:27:10,452 MAN: (SINGING) Pump up your fist If you twist like this 477 00:27:10,576 --> 00:27:11,701 Till the lights go out 478 00:27:11,826 --> 00:27:13,034 Bring them out Bring them out 479 00:27:14,408 --> 00:27:16,408 Katie 480 00:27:16,492 --> 00:27:19,241 I don't know why I even try 481 00:27:19,366 --> 00:27:21,531 'Cause lately 482 00:27:21,657 --> 00:27:24,240 You're always out with other guys 483 00:27:24,365 --> 00:27:26,780 Pretty baby 484 00:27:26,905 --> 00:27:29,363 Don't you know I'll treat you right 485 00:27:29,488 --> 00:27:31,987 I'll go crazy 486 00:27:32,071 --> 00:27:35,361 If you pass me up tonight 487 00:27:35,611 --> 00:27:38,027 Hey, hey, hey, hey 488 00:27:38,110 --> 00:27:40,443 Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey 489 00:27:40,568 --> 00:27:42,983 All this time can't get it off my mind 490 00:27:43,067 --> 00:27:44,691 Dance the night away 491 00:27:44,816 --> 00:27:45,775 Keep rocking with me 492 00:27:45,900 --> 00:27:48,149 When the grooves all right Rocking all night 493 00:27:48,233 --> 00:27:50,315 I want to hear you say 494 00:27:50,648 --> 00:27:53,189 All the girls and the boys And people making noise 495 00:27:53,272 --> 00:27:54,563 Just let me hear you shout 496 00:27:54,688 --> 00:27:55,980 Bring them out Bring them out 497 00:27:56,063 --> 00:27:58,354 All the girls and the boys And people making noise 498 00:27:58,479 --> 00:28:00,020 Just let me hear you shout 499 00:28:00,145 --> 00:28:01,187 Bring them out Bring them out 500 00:28:01,312 --> 00:28:03,186 Pump up your fist If you twist like this 501 00:28:05,019 --> 00:28:05,519 Till the lights go out 502 00:28:05,644 --> 00:28:06,602 Bring them out Bring them out 503 00:28:06,727 --> 00:28:08,392 Wake up 504 00:28:08,518 --> 00:28:11,184 I'm calling you up I need a ride 505 00:28:11,267 --> 00:28:13,391 We're gonna shake up 506 00:28:13,517 --> 00:28:16,224 So hurry it up, no wasted time 507 00:28:16,349 --> 00:28:19,389 The girls in their makeup In black and white 508 00:28:19,515 --> 00:28:21,722 Exchanging looks tonight 509 00:28:21,847 --> 00:28:24,721 I just ran into some other friends of mine 510 00:28:24,805 --> 00:28:27,221 Someone's coming round To pick them up at nine 511 00:28:27,346 --> 00:28:29,845 All the girls and the boys And people making noise 512 00:28:29,969 --> 00:28:30,969 Just let me hear you shout 513 00:28:31,053 --> 00:28:32,594 Bring them out Bring them out 514 00:28:33,144 --> 00:28:34,185 (SCREAMING) 515 00:28:34,560 --> 00:28:35,560 MAN: Fuck yeah! 516 00:28:37,351 --> 00:28:38,850 (HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING) 517 00:28:53,323 --> 00:28:54,573 Drink! 518 00:28:56,114 --> 00:28:59,280 - Sorry. What? - I made the shot. Now you drink. 519 00:28:59,405 --> 00:29:01,945 Yeah, yeah, right. Cool. All right. 520 00:29:06,777 --> 00:29:09,485 - So when do I get a turn? - When I miss. 521 00:29:11,151 --> 00:29:12,942 You kids having fun? 522 00:29:14,983 --> 00:29:17,192 What? I can't play? 523 00:29:18,940 --> 00:29:23,564 What do you say we wrap up this game and bring it up to my room? 524 00:29:24,106 --> 00:29:25,397 Minus the dickhead. 525 00:29:25,522 --> 00:29:27,563 Yeah. I think I'll pass. 526 00:29:32,978 --> 00:29:35,935 Could I get the beer? No? Later? Well, okay. 527 00:29:37,227 --> 00:29:39,767 - What an a-hole. - Tell me about it. 528 00:29:40,226 --> 00:29:42,100 Anyway, where were we? 529 00:29:42,392 --> 00:29:43,683 (COIN PLOPPING) 530 00:29:44,433 --> 00:29:45,641 Nice. 531 00:29:48,098 --> 00:29:51,098 Nitrous in the hizzie! Who wants a balloon? 532 00:29:53,431 --> 00:29:55,929 Granola Bar! Can I have one, please? 533 00:29:56,013 --> 00:29:58,220 Whoa, whoa, whoa! The lady needs a balloon. 534 00:29:58,304 --> 00:30:00,137 There you go, darling, that one's just for you. 535 00:30:00,262 --> 00:30:02,261 - I'm gonna sit. - All right. 536 00:30:06,093 --> 00:30:10,050 Hey, here you go. Have a balloon. 537 00:30:10,134 --> 00:30:12,924 This balloon's for you! Have a balloon! 538 00:30:14,591 --> 00:30:15,882 No, no. 539 00:30:17,007 --> 00:30:21,672 You have to inhale it. It makes chicks crazy horny, like her. 540 00:30:22,088 --> 00:30:23,338 MORRIS: Wow. 541 00:30:24,921 --> 00:30:26,379 (INHALING DEEPLY) 542 00:30:27,087 --> 00:30:28,879 Feel the flow. 543 00:30:32,752 --> 00:30:37,459 Hey, I saw a laundry room back there. You want to go make out or something? 544 00:30:38,043 --> 00:30:40,916 - Oh, my God! Are you serious? - Yeah. 545 00:30:41,042 --> 00:30:44,957 I haven't heard a line like that since, like, high school. Later. 546 00:30:45,914 --> 00:30:47,789 You've got flat tits! 547 00:30:48,831 --> 00:30:50,039 Do you mind? 548 00:30:50,122 --> 00:30:53,912 What? Yeah, absolutely. Have a... Have a sip. 549 00:30:56,661 --> 00:30:59,785 Or down the whole thing. That's cool. Whatever. 550 00:30:59,910 --> 00:31:01,244 (BURPING) 551 00:31:08,366 --> 00:31:11,699 I'm so getting laid. Excuse me. Excuse me! 552 00:31:12,115 --> 00:31:13,656 Excuse me. Excuse me! 553 00:31:13,740 --> 00:31:15,364 What's up? How's it going? 554 00:31:15,489 --> 00:31:17,864 Excuse me! Excuse me! Excuse me! Excuse me! 555 00:31:17,947 --> 00:31:19,863 You're bigger than me. Excuse me! Excuse me! 556 00:31:30,068 --> 00:31:31,735 This is awesome! 557 00:31:42,939 --> 00:31:45,148 Wait. What was that? 558 00:31:45,731 --> 00:31:47,147 (GIRLS LAUGHING) 559 00:31:47,272 --> 00:31:49,604 Shit! I think someone's coming. 560 00:31:53,061 --> 00:31:54,103 - No, no, no. The bed, the bed! - What? 561 00:31:54,228 --> 00:31:55,311 - I'm not gonna fit under there! - You'll fit! 562 00:31:55,394 --> 00:31:58,185 - I will not fit under this bed. - Get under! 563 00:31:59,727 --> 00:31:59,976 (DOOR OPENING) 564 00:32:03,100 --> 00:32:05,100 Are you sure this room's okay? 565 00:32:05,225 --> 00:32:08,807 It's fine. Relax, okay? Everyone's downstairs. 566 00:32:09,223 --> 00:32:11,598 - Are you sure? - Yeah. Positive. 567 00:32:11,973 --> 00:32:15,305 GIRL 1: I'm just a little nervous, you know? I've never really been with a girl before. 568 00:32:15,763 --> 00:32:20,262 GIRL 2: Don't worry. I'll be gentle. I promise. 569 00:32:27,051 --> 00:32:28,135 (INAUDIBLE) 570 00:32:37,382 --> 00:32:40,506 Morris, maybe it's because I'm really high right now, 571 00:32:40,590 --> 00:32:42,881 but I will just go for this. 572 00:32:42,964 --> 00:32:45,379 Go for what? You want another... 573 00:32:56,251 --> 00:33:00,375 Sorry. Your hand is down my pants. 574 00:33:00,458 --> 00:33:02,374 I know. Just relax. 575 00:33:03,666 --> 00:33:05,040 Sweet! 576 00:33:06,331 --> 00:33:09,081 Oh, God! That feels so good! 577 00:33:09,873 --> 00:33:13,454 - Your hands are like butter! - Are like butter. 578 00:33:14,745 --> 00:33:18,036 You know, normally, I'd be doing this to myself, 579 00:33:18,744 --> 00:33:21,077 but this is way better. 580 00:33:21,161 --> 00:33:24,577 Plus, I don't have to worry about my mom walking in, and... 581 00:33:31,241 --> 00:33:33,699 Heather? Hello? 582 00:33:33,824 --> 00:33:35,240 (SNORING) 583 00:33:36,031 --> 00:33:38,114 Damn it! So close! 584 00:33:38,489 --> 00:33:39,905 (SIRENS BLARING) 585 00:33:51,421 --> 00:33:52,672 Cop! 586 00:33:53,404 --> 00:33:54,778 - What's your problem? - Hey, come on. 587 00:33:54,903 --> 00:33:56,611 - Run! - Who is that? 588 00:33:58,777 --> 00:34:01,569 Party's busted! Everybody run! 589 00:34:06,151 --> 00:34:07,525 GIRL: That sucks. 590 00:34:09,941 --> 00:34:11,232 (GIRL MOANING) 591 00:34:16,647 --> 00:34:18,063 GIRL 1: That feels so good. 592 00:34:18,188 --> 00:34:20,938 GIRL 2: I almost forgot. GIRL 1: You carry that with you? 593 00:34:21,063 --> 00:34:23,271 GIRL 2: They don't call it a pocket rocket for nothing. 594 00:34:23,396 --> 00:34:24,603 (INAUDIBLE) 595 00:34:25,478 --> 00:34:26,853 (VIBRATOR BUZZING) 596 00:34:29,310 --> 00:34:30,726 GIRL 1: You got it? 597 00:34:31,685 --> 00:34:34,143 GIRL 2: Yeah. I got it. Where were we? 598 00:34:34,267 --> 00:34:35,392 (GIRL 1 MOANING) 599 00:34:40,682 --> 00:34:43,140 GIRL 2: I didn't know you were so kinky. 600 00:34:48,346 --> 00:34:49,513 GIRL 1: Yeah! 601 00:34:50,470 --> 00:34:52,470 Kiss me. Kiss me now. 602 00:34:52,554 --> 00:34:54,803 - GIRL 2: Really? - Kiss me! 603 00:34:54,886 --> 00:34:56,635 Do it! 604 00:34:56,719 --> 00:34:59,385 - What was that? - GIRL 2: I didn't hear anything. 605 00:34:59,510 --> 00:35:02,008 - GIRL 1: Are you sure? - Yeah. Just relax. 606 00:35:02,592 --> 00:35:05,050 What the fuck do you know about welfare reform? 607 00:35:05,133 --> 00:35:07,632 MAN: Come on down and check it out. 608 00:35:12,756 --> 00:35:13,922 (CELL PHONE BEEPS) 609 00:35:20,379 --> 00:35:24,836 So, I don't really know what this means, 610 00:35:26,085 --> 00:35:30,334 but Amy says that she's under the bed with your friend Carter. 611 00:35:30,418 --> 00:35:32,792 (BOTH LAUGHING) 612 00:35:32,874 --> 00:35:35,207 - Should I be worried? - Yeah, definitely. 613 00:35:35,290 --> 00:35:36,832 Okay. 614 00:35:36,915 --> 00:35:39,789 Wait a second. Why aren't they on top of the bed? 615 00:35:39,872 --> 00:35:41,872 That's a good question. 616 00:35:44,496 --> 00:35:47,329 So what are you guys? Freshmen? 617 00:35:49,203 --> 00:35:52,036 Yeah. Yeah, yeah, we're freshmen. Yep. 618 00:35:52,119 --> 00:35:53,785 What's your major? 619 00:35:53,868 --> 00:35:55,743 Uh... 620 00:35:55,868 --> 00:35:58,325 - Photography. - Really? 621 00:35:59,033 --> 00:36:03,533 I love photography. I really suck, but that's cool. 622 00:36:03,657 --> 00:36:05,365 I heard they have a really great program here. 623 00:36:05,490 --> 00:36:08,031 Yeah. It's supposed to be one of the best in the country. 624 00:36:08,156 --> 00:36:10,738 Maybe you can give me a lesson sometime. 625 00:36:10,863 --> 00:36:12,363 Yeah, sure. 626 00:36:13,696 --> 00:36:15,029 (DOOR CLOSING) 627 00:36:17,195 --> 00:36:18,695 That was so hot. 628 00:36:18,820 --> 00:36:20,486 Please tell me you're as horny as I am right now. 629 00:36:20,569 --> 00:36:21,568 - Hornier. - Good. 630 00:36:21,694 --> 00:36:22,860 BEARCAT: What's up, man? 631 00:36:22,985 --> 00:36:26,900 Wow, motherfucker, I can't believe we did that shit last night. 632 00:36:41,146 --> 00:36:42,562 What the... 633 00:36:44,187 --> 00:36:46,020 Christmas came early! 634 00:36:46,311 --> 00:36:47,686 (VIBRATOR BUZZING) 635 00:36:47,769 --> 00:36:49,769 (BEARCAT MOANING) 636 00:36:58,516 --> 00:37:01,807 - Here we are. - Yep. Here we are. 637 00:37:02,974 --> 00:37:06,014 You know, you're different than most college guys. 638 00:37:06,138 --> 00:37:09,930 Well, you know, I don't even really feel like a college guy. 639 00:37:10,720 --> 00:37:13,637 Yeah. I could tell. But it's a good thing. 640 00:37:18,593 --> 00:37:21,051 - Maybe I'll see you around. - Yeah. 641 00:37:21,968 --> 00:37:24,300 - I hope so. - Okay. Bye. 642 00:37:24,425 --> 00:37:26,050 In the night sky 643 00:37:27,674 --> 00:37:30,674 In the night sky 644 00:37:31,798 --> 00:37:34,713 In the night sky 645 00:37:40,003 --> 00:37:44,752 In the night sky It used to be home 646 00:37:47,793 --> 00:37:49,626 - Kevin! - Jesus, what? 647 00:37:50,793 --> 00:37:52,167 What do you want? 648 00:38:23,990 --> 00:38:27,115 Morris. Wake up, sleepy. 649 00:38:35,821 --> 00:38:38,529 Holy shit. Did we... 650 00:38:38,653 --> 00:38:40,985 Heck, yeah! All night long. 651 00:38:41,069 --> 00:38:42,069 (GROWLING) 652 00:38:42,152 --> 00:38:43,568 Give it to me again, big boy! 653 00:38:43,652 --> 00:38:46,276 This is the greatest day of my life. 654 00:38:48,317 --> 00:38:52,024 Hey, Dad. Dad! What are you doing here? 655 00:38:52,149 --> 00:38:57,481 You missed your interview, Morris. You blew it, the scholarship, Fieldmont, 656 00:38:58,814 --> 00:39:00,271 everything. 657 00:39:01,021 --> 00:39:02,313 (SCREAMING) 658 00:39:10,144 --> 00:39:11,394 Shit! 659 00:39:14,643 --> 00:39:16,267 The interview! 660 00:39:26,972 --> 00:39:28,263 Give it up 661 00:39:31,471 --> 00:39:32,804 Give it up 662 00:39:36,053 --> 00:39:37,344 Give it up 663 00:39:40,635 --> 00:39:41,593 Give it up 664 00:39:48,091 --> 00:39:50,674 Apparently, Mr. Hooper's a no-show. 665 00:39:55,339 --> 00:39:56,797 MORRIS: Thank God! 666 00:39:57,963 --> 00:40:00,837 You're still here. I'm sorry I'm late. 667 00:40:05,628 --> 00:40:10,459 Now, behind me is the bronze statue of a revolutionary war hero, 668 00:40:10,542 --> 00:40:12,792 General W.S. Fieldmont. 669 00:40:12,917 --> 00:40:16,707 It has become one of the most sacred landmarks of our time. 670 00:40:18,873 --> 00:40:22,705 My life is over. My parents are gonna disown me. 671 00:40:22,789 --> 00:40:27,663 - Dude, they probably didn't even notice. - Didn't notice? Did you see my face? 672 00:40:27,788 --> 00:40:28,954 (LAUGHING) 673 00:40:29,079 --> 00:40:32,078 Yeah, dude, I did. That shit was so funny. 674 00:40:32,161 --> 00:40:35,785 Whatever, dude. Just kiss the scholarship bye-bye and move on. 675 00:40:35,910 --> 00:40:37,285 And where the hell is Kevin, by the way? 676 00:40:37,409 --> 00:40:39,867 You know, he should've been here by now. This is his campus tour. 677 00:40:39,951 --> 00:40:43,824 He probably just hooked up last night. At least someone did. 678 00:40:44,783 --> 00:40:46,907 You don't think something happened to him, do you? 679 00:40:47,032 --> 00:40:50,614 Dude, it's college. What could possibly happen to him? 680 00:40:53,738 --> 00:40:55,738 (ALL LAUGHING) 681 00:41:11,983 --> 00:41:16,440 Looking good, Kev. A lot hairier than I thought you'd be. 682 00:41:22,146 --> 00:41:24,479 - Check it out. - Hey! 683 00:41:24,604 --> 00:41:27,229 - Nice diaper! - Looking good, buddy! 684 00:41:31,268 --> 00:41:33,601 Okay. This is really embarrassing. 685 00:41:33,684 --> 00:41:36,100 Yeah, it's not really the highlight of my day either, Carter. 686 00:41:36,184 --> 00:41:37,433 Why would they do this to you? 687 00:41:37,558 --> 00:41:42,349 I don't know. Because they can, I guess. There's some clothes in my car. Try... 688 00:41:50,930 --> 00:41:52,179 Maybe we should just go home. 689 00:41:52,262 --> 00:41:54,012 We're not going anywhere, all right? Not yet. 690 00:41:54,095 --> 00:41:56,512 Why not? What are you trying to prove? 691 00:41:56,595 --> 00:42:00,052 I'm not trying to prove anything. I'm just trying to have fun. 692 00:42:00,177 --> 00:42:02,843 Amen to that! God, I love the new Kevin! 693 00:42:02,926 --> 00:42:04,634 You call this having a good time? 694 00:42:04,759 --> 00:42:08,133 I'll get back at them. It could have been worse. 695 00:42:08,257 --> 00:42:11,090 What could be worse than getting duct-taped naked to a statue all night? 696 00:42:11,423 --> 00:42:14,923 Hey, what's up, Gina? It's that boring guy you dumped! 697 00:42:15,048 --> 00:42:16,755 Fieldmont rocks! 698 00:42:17,005 --> 00:42:19,546 (KEVIN WHOOPING) 699 00:42:27,419 --> 00:42:29,335 Dude, maybe the message didn't even send. 700 00:42:29,418 --> 00:42:32,043 You know what? Whatever, I'm kind of hoping it did. 701 00:42:32,167 --> 00:42:35,583 Really? Well, in that case, let's do like a whole Kevin party series. 702 00:42:35,666 --> 00:42:37,458 - We'll post it online... - Yeah, dude, don't push it. 703 00:42:37,582 --> 00:42:38,707 Okay. 704 00:42:41,581 --> 00:42:44,247 Come on, Morris. Being stuck here isn't the worst thing. 705 00:42:44,372 --> 00:42:46,871 You know, I mean, it's probably for the best. 706 00:42:46,954 --> 00:42:48,163 How's it for the best? 707 00:42:48,246 --> 00:42:50,661 Because if you went home now, you know exactly what would happen. 708 00:42:50,745 --> 00:42:54,203 Yeah! Your parents would go ape-shit on your ass for blowing the big interview. 709 00:42:54,328 --> 00:42:56,744 And now at least you could probably talk to that Dean Chandler guy. 710 00:42:56,826 --> 00:42:58,826 You know, explain what happened. 711 00:42:58,910 --> 00:43:00,618 You really think that would work? 712 00:43:00,742 --> 00:43:02,909 I think it's worth a shot. What do you have to lose? 713 00:43:03,033 --> 00:43:04,200 And you may see that Heather chick again 714 00:43:04,283 --> 00:43:06,824 and get more than a half hand job. 715 00:43:08,573 --> 00:43:10,906 I think he'll definitely see her again. 716 00:43:11,530 --> 00:43:12,739 (CARTER EXCLAIMS) 717 00:43:14,489 --> 00:43:15,905 Yeah. 718 00:43:16,237 --> 00:43:18,029 (HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING) 719 00:43:42,396 --> 00:43:47,395 By the way, I sort of accidentally told Kendall we were in college last night. 720 00:44:26,476 --> 00:44:28,600 Looks like those high school fuckers aren't as stupid as we thought. 721 00:44:28,725 --> 00:44:30,641 They got front row seats to nipple city. 722 00:44:36,264 --> 00:44:38,597 Motherfuckers! 723 00:44:40,138 --> 00:44:42,138 It's part of the whole sorority experience. 724 00:44:42,221 --> 00:44:45,803 Fraternities throw parties, and we have charity events. 725 00:44:45,887 --> 00:44:47,761 Nice! Are any of them naked? 726 00:44:47,886 --> 00:44:48,844 (BLOWING WHISTLE) 727 00:44:48,969 --> 00:44:52,052 All right, bitches, you're up! This isn't social hour! 728 00:44:52,177 --> 00:44:53,925 So I guess you better go, huh? 729 00:44:54,051 --> 00:44:55,967 Yeah, but maybe if you're lucky, 730 00:44:56,051 --> 00:44:58,799 we'll let you guys buy us a few beers tonight at Bruno's. 731 00:44:58,883 --> 00:45:00,716 - What's that? - A bar. 732 00:45:01,215 --> 00:45:03,964 Wait. You guys do go to bars, right? 733 00:45:05,131 --> 00:45:09,047 - Bars? Yeah. All the time. - Every day. I'm always at the bar. 734 00:45:09,588 --> 00:45:12,087 Just make sure you bring this guy. 735 00:45:12,545 --> 00:45:14,086 - This guy? - Me? 736 00:45:14,211 --> 00:45:15,462 Yeah, you. 737 00:45:15,544 --> 00:45:19,169 Last night was the first frat party I actually enjoyed. 738 00:45:19,294 --> 00:45:20,917 Because of me? 739 00:45:21,209 --> 00:45:24,667 - Okay. - Well, we'll see you guys tonight then. 740 00:45:26,666 --> 00:45:29,957 Hey, I was thinking maybe we could, you know, 741 00:45:30,041 --> 00:45:31,914 finish what we started last night. 742 00:45:32,040 --> 00:45:35,247 Maybe. Just try not to pass out on me this time. 743 00:45:39,079 --> 00:45:40,163 God, that girl fucking rocks. 744 00:45:44,036 --> 00:45:45,077 - Kev? - Yeah? 745 00:45:45,202 --> 00:45:51,242 On a scale of one to ten, I like boobies at, like, 9,000. Seriously. 746 00:45:51,367 --> 00:45:53,283 What's up, fellows? 747 00:45:53,992 --> 00:45:54,991 Hey, Kevin! 748 00:45:55,074 --> 00:45:59,489 Heard you and the General got a little cozy last night. Jesus Christ! 749 00:46:00,115 --> 00:46:02,156 Yeah. Yeah, that was a good one, Teague. 750 00:46:02,239 --> 00:46:06,196 Hey, I don't suppose you know what happened to my car, do you? 751 00:46:10,278 --> 00:46:12,736 - So that's how it's gonna be, Teague? - That's right, pre-frosh. 752 00:46:12,861 --> 00:46:15,776 In fact, we got a job for you three douche bags. 753 00:46:15,860 --> 00:46:17,943 What kind of job? 754 00:46:18,026 --> 00:46:22,150 Nothing much. We're just gonna need you to clean the house for our party tonight. 755 00:46:22,233 --> 00:46:26,523 Maybe wash my car. You know how I like to keep my ride clean. 756 00:46:26,648 --> 00:46:28,898 Where did I put them keys? 757 00:46:29,898 --> 00:46:31,314 (EXCLAIMING) 758 00:46:39,520 --> 00:46:43,186 - Fuck that! No! - Am I sensing some hostility? 759 00:46:43,311 --> 00:46:44,351 Wait, are you guys serious? 760 00:46:44,476 --> 00:46:45,893 Well, you guys didn't think your room and board 761 00:46:46,018 --> 00:46:47,350 were gonna be free here, did you? 762 00:46:47,475 --> 00:46:49,517 We're not cleaning your house! No fucking way! 763 00:46:49,641 --> 00:46:52,433 Well, maybe your little girlfriends over there would like to find out 764 00:46:52,516 --> 00:46:54,891 you guys are still in high school. 765 00:46:55,015 --> 00:46:56,348 How do you know we didn't already tell them? 766 00:46:56,473 --> 00:47:00,930 Because if you did, they wouldn't be giving you the time of day, you little dicks. 767 00:47:01,014 --> 00:47:03,429 Better get to work now, boys! 768 00:47:03,512 --> 00:47:05,220 TEAGUE: Pick the keys up. 769 00:47:08,761 --> 00:47:09,886 Boom! 770 00:47:12,759 --> 00:47:15,468 And Kevin? Kevy? 771 00:47:16,967 --> 00:47:18,758 Don't waste your time with Kendall. 772 00:47:18,842 --> 00:47:21,133 You don't want my sloppy seconds, do you? 773 00:47:21,215 --> 00:47:24,673 Unless you're into that? You fucking sicko! Go inside. 774 00:47:30,838 --> 00:47:34,378 Dude, why do we have to clean? Don't they got pledges to do this shit? 775 00:47:34,503 --> 00:47:37,461 Dude, I think this weekend we are the pledges. 776 00:47:39,544 --> 00:47:41,501 (BEER SONG PLAYING) 777 00:47:51,498 --> 00:47:53,539 MAN: (SINGING) Don't let them take it all away 778 00:47:58,163 --> 00:48:00,329 I'm down on my luck I'm out on the streets 779 00:48:00,455 --> 00:48:02,870 I'm at wit's end I've nearly been beat 780 00:48:02,995 --> 00:48:05,952 See they've taken my home They've taken my wife 781 00:48:06,077 --> 00:48:08,368 They've taken my job And they've taken my life 782 00:48:08,493 --> 00:48:11,118 But there's one thing That they will not take 783 00:48:11,201 --> 00:48:13,950 That I will hold till the end Until my dying day 784 00:48:14,033 --> 00:48:16,657 'Cause it's part of me And it's time that we say 785 00:48:16,782 --> 00:48:19,781 They will not take it all away! 786 00:48:34,944 --> 00:48:36,818 Don't let them take it all away 787 00:48:40,359 --> 00:48:42,358 It's getting harder every day 788 00:48:45,816 --> 00:48:47,815 Brothers, sisters, hear me say 789 00:48:51,939 --> 00:48:54,771 I'm pounding the pavement Through thick and thin 790 00:48:54,855 --> 00:48:57,229 Good times and bad I just can't win 791 00:48:57,312 --> 00:49:00,311 I've been beat on, kicked on Insulted to my face 792 00:49:00,395 --> 00:49:02,686 The whole bleeding world thinks I'm a bleeding disgrace 793 00:49:02,811 --> 00:49:05,768 Yeah, they can own my body But they'll never own my mind 794 00:49:05,852 --> 00:49:08,101 So they better face the facts 'Cause now is the time 795 00:49:08,184 --> 00:49:11,142 Till we all join hands And all of us say 796 00:49:11,267 --> 00:49:14,099 They will not take it all away 797 00:49:25,679 --> 00:49:28,428 That's really funny. 'Cause I've been cleaning all day, 798 00:49:28,553 --> 00:49:30,969 so you think that it'd be funny to come in and throw a cup down. 799 00:49:31,052 --> 00:49:34,010 Because I've been working really hard and you want to ruin that for me. 800 00:49:34,135 --> 00:49:37,842 I love that! You're just... You're so fucking cool, you bitch. 801 00:49:37,967 --> 00:49:41,300 Yeah, get some, you punk-ass bitch! Come here, you steaming fuck! 802 00:49:50,713 --> 00:49:55,254 - I don't know if this is a good idea. - You want that scholarship, don't you? 803 00:49:56,461 --> 00:49:57,587 Go on. 804 00:50:02,293 --> 00:50:07,417 Come on, man! You can do it! I believe in you! You're the coolest, bro! 805 00:50:08,541 --> 00:50:11,957 - Yeah, he's totally fucked. Yep. - Yeah, totally. 806 00:50:12,290 --> 00:50:13,707 Shit! Run away! 807 00:50:15,290 --> 00:50:21,204 Let's just say that this morning was, well, rather shocking. 808 00:50:21,745 --> 00:50:24,744 Heck, I didn't even know what some of those words meant. 809 00:50:24,869 --> 00:50:27,119 I had to search the Internet for them. 810 00:50:27,244 --> 00:50:31,576 But I guess that's what happens when you choose to stay at a frat house, 811 00:50:31,659 --> 00:50:34,617 rather than the dorm room we assigned you. 812 00:50:34,700 --> 00:50:37,616 I know, sir. It was a bad choice. 813 00:50:37,700 --> 00:50:42,739 Christ, if I had my way, I'd kick every fraternity off this campus. 814 00:50:42,865 --> 00:50:47,904 Do you know that those animals suck nitrous oxide 815 00:50:48,029 --> 00:50:51,195 out of balloons just to get high? 816 00:50:51,279 --> 00:50:53,528 Really? That's just awful! 817 00:50:54,278 --> 00:50:55,444 (CHUCKLING) 818 00:50:56,277 --> 00:51:00,693 Mr. Hooper, there is no doubt that you are academically gifted, 819 00:51:02,025 --> 00:51:07,065 but the scholarships we give out here are about much more than just that. 820 00:51:07,190 --> 00:51:09,190 Dean Chandler, that's me. 821 00:51:09,982 --> 00:51:12,064 My family has a long history at Fieldmont, 822 00:51:12,189 --> 00:51:14,855 and I'd like to continue that legacy. 823 00:51:14,938 --> 00:51:17,563 Well, you know, son, I guess you're gonna have to prove it to me. 824 00:51:17,646 --> 00:51:19,603 For, as of right now, Mr. Hooper, 825 00:51:19,687 --> 00:51:23,853 you and your scholarship are hanging by a thread. 826 00:51:29,392 --> 00:51:32,183 God! You're so lame! 827 00:51:32,267 --> 00:51:34,099 Dude, where have you been? It's go time! 828 00:51:34,224 --> 00:51:38,764 Relax! Relax! I just had to run a little errand. 829 00:51:39,764 --> 00:51:43,596 All my years of hard work have finally paid off! That's my boy. 830 00:51:45,804 --> 00:51:48,011 - Nice. - What's wrong, Morris? 831 00:51:49,636 --> 00:51:52,885 What's wrong? I'm having a breakdown, Kevin! 832 00:51:52,969 --> 00:51:54,843 Or have you forgotten what that feels like? 833 00:51:54,926 --> 00:51:56,926 - I understand, man. - What am I gonna do? 834 00:51:57,009 --> 00:52:00,883 Somehow, I have to convince the Dean that I actually want to go here. 835 00:52:00,967 --> 00:52:03,133 Well, look, there's nothing you can do about it tonight, all right? 836 00:52:03,258 --> 00:52:07,048 - So let's just go get our girls. Here. - This doesn't even look like me. 837 00:52:07,172 --> 00:52:09,172 Whatever, Morris. Just tell the bouncer you don't photograph well. 838 00:52:09,297 --> 00:52:10,839 Let me see it. 839 00:52:12,213 --> 00:52:16,753 Dude, this will totally work! You guys are both just so ugly. 840 00:52:16,878 --> 00:52:19,002 You're a little uglier, but it'll be good. Don't worry about it. 841 00:52:19,294 --> 00:52:20,752 (LAUGHING) 842 00:52:21,043 --> 00:52:22,751 Laquisha? 843 00:52:22,876 --> 00:52:26,667 Man, you actually expect me to buy that your name is Laquisha? 844 00:52:27,458 --> 00:52:29,999 You know what? I like how you roll, dog. You in. 845 00:52:30,083 --> 00:52:32,332 10 bucks cover tonight, guys. 846 00:52:33,832 --> 00:52:35,039 Shit! 847 00:52:35,747 --> 00:52:38,288 - Sorry, guys. No dough, no go. - Fuck! 848 00:52:39,080 --> 00:52:40,205 Let the ladies through. 849 00:52:40,287 --> 00:52:42,745 Let the ladies through. Let the ladies through. 850 00:52:42,829 --> 00:52:47,036 - What was that? They didn't pay. - Did you see the size of those racks? 851 00:52:48,744 --> 00:52:52,326 - No. - Yeah, you big, big man. 852 00:52:52,410 --> 00:52:54,950 You like that when I squeeze them together for you? 853 00:52:55,075 --> 00:52:56,033 I said no. 854 00:52:59,990 --> 00:53:02,490 I cannot believe those assholes ripped us off. 855 00:53:02,573 --> 00:53:05,072 They've done pretty much everything else to us so far this weekend. 856 00:53:05,155 --> 00:53:06,905 Why not that? 857 00:53:07,030 --> 00:53:08,488 Man, do you think this is what it's going to be like 858 00:53:08,613 --> 00:53:11,570 - when we're really in college? - Who knows? 859 00:53:11,654 --> 00:53:14,736 Well, we probably won't all be together. I know that. 860 00:53:14,861 --> 00:53:17,443 God, Morris, you're such a fucking baby! Would you stop being a girl? 861 00:53:17,568 --> 00:53:20,693 - Would you please just shut up? - What? It's true! 862 00:53:20,818 --> 00:53:24,192 Think about it, guys. This is it! Senior year. 863 00:53:26,274 --> 00:53:28,315 Man, he's right. This is it. 864 00:53:28,399 --> 00:53:30,815 You know, all the more of a reason to take advantage of being here. 865 00:53:30,898 --> 00:53:32,481 All right, I'm not sitting around. Come on, you guys! 866 00:53:32,564 --> 00:53:33,605 Where are you going? 867 00:53:33,730 --> 00:53:36,188 What do you think? We've got a frat party to go to. Come on! 868 00:53:36,313 --> 00:53:38,688 - What about the girls? - Shut up. 869 00:53:40,436 --> 00:53:41,561 (MORRIS GROANING) 870 00:53:42,811 --> 00:53:43,894 - It hurts. - Morris, let's go! 871 00:53:44,019 --> 00:53:45,394 Come on. 872 00:53:45,519 --> 00:53:48,476 - Wait for me! - You're so slow! You're so slow! 873 00:53:49,393 --> 00:53:52,392 MAN: (SINGING) I was on my way up She was on her way down 874 00:53:52,517 --> 00:53:56,265 And I didn't know I crossed that line 875 00:53:56,391 --> 00:54:00,847 Make me sick to my stomach When I think of that woman 876 00:54:00,973 --> 00:54:03,763 Sitting in this cell of mine 877 00:54:04,180 --> 00:54:08,054 I said, "Goddamn, I'm only a man" 878 00:54:08,178 --> 00:54:11,344 Give me 15 years to life 879 00:54:12,219 --> 00:54:14,010 Jailbait 880 00:54:17,509 --> 00:54:20,841 (JAILBAIT CONTINUES PLAYING) 881 00:54:31,047 --> 00:54:33,546 (SLICE OF LIFE PLAYING) 882 00:54:44,709 --> 00:54:46,459 GIRL: Come on, cowboy. 883 00:54:48,042 --> 00:54:49,124 MAN: Yeah! 884 00:54:49,999 --> 00:54:53,165 GIRL: You guys ready to celebrate? All right! 885 00:54:56,872 --> 00:54:58,622 Where's my whip? 886 00:55:00,080 --> 00:55:02,454 You want to be my bitch, huh? 887 00:55:06,827 --> 00:55:08,161 Pass it on. 888 00:55:33,195 --> 00:55:34,362 (EXCLAIMS) 889 00:55:37,860 --> 00:55:41,943 - Fellows, it's not polite to stare! - What the fuck, man? What's up? 890 00:55:42,526 --> 00:55:46,274 Ladies, I want you to meet some very special guests. 891 00:55:46,358 --> 00:55:48,024 - Hi, boys. - What's up? 892 00:55:48,149 --> 00:55:51,815 - Hi, cutie. - Me? Hi. 893 00:55:51,940 --> 00:55:54,189 Wait. You're the Penthouse Pet of the Year. 894 00:55:54,314 --> 00:55:55,438 Mmm-hmm. 895 00:55:55,522 --> 00:55:58,896 - (STAMMERING) And you're... - On the cover of Penthouse Letters. 896 00:55:59,021 --> 00:56:01,812 Fellows! Good for you for staying current. 897 00:56:01,895 --> 00:56:03,144 (SIGHS) 898 00:56:03,269 --> 00:56:07,477 Where were we? Where were we? Where were... 899 00:56:10,392 --> 00:56:12,642 Yeah, that's right. Ladies? 900 00:56:12,767 --> 00:56:16,016 These guys were nice enough to pay for all this. 901 00:56:16,140 --> 00:56:18,640 Wait a second. That's what you did with our money? You paid for this party? 902 00:56:18,765 --> 00:56:21,639 Hey, kegs aren't cheap these days, my man. 903 00:56:21,764 --> 00:56:23,764 Neither are the circus animals we got coming later. 904 00:56:23,846 --> 00:56:25,554 Wait! You couldn't have paid for this. 905 00:56:25,679 --> 00:56:27,096 We didn't even have that much money in our wallets. 906 00:56:27,179 --> 00:56:30,803 - Yeah. - Yeah. What's up with that? 907 00:56:30,928 --> 00:56:32,636 Luckily, you guys had some plastic. 908 00:56:32,761 --> 00:56:34,552 God, my parents gave me that in case of an emergency. 909 00:56:34,676 --> 00:56:36,635 Well, good thing they got such a high limit! 910 00:56:36,718 --> 00:56:40,300 We almost maxed those puppies out. Especially on this guy. 911 00:56:41,008 --> 00:56:42,424 Verne Troyer? 912 00:56:42,966 --> 00:56:45,132 - That's Mini-Me. - Verne! 913 00:56:48,173 --> 00:56:51,880 - Why do you keep hitting me? Fuck! - Shut up, bitch! 914 00:56:52,922 --> 00:56:54,338 Fucking Mini-Me. 915 00:56:54,463 --> 00:56:57,712 It was Bearcat's idea. God, I love that guy. 916 00:56:59,336 --> 00:57:03,293 Anyhow, we've gotta go be social. 917 00:57:03,418 --> 00:57:06,959 You douche bags have fun. Okay? Okay. 918 00:57:07,084 --> 00:57:08,250 Babies? 919 00:57:11,208 --> 00:57:14,332 That was so weird, but so hot! Dude, she grabbed my nipple! 920 00:57:14,457 --> 00:57:16,414 Dude, she twisted my nipple, dude! 921 00:57:16,539 --> 00:57:19,789 So, basically, this is our party. 922 00:57:19,872 --> 00:57:24,787 - Yeah. In a roundabout way, I guess it is. - Why don't I like where this is going? 923 00:57:24,870 --> 00:57:26,953 Come on, Morris! I mean, we paid for it. We may as well enjoy it. 924 00:57:27,078 --> 00:57:29,661 - That's my boy! - Come on! Who wants to keg stand? 925 00:57:29,786 --> 00:57:32,660 Me! Me! I'm first! I wanna go first! Please. 926 00:57:35,493 --> 00:57:37,034 (LET'S GO GET WASTED PLAYING) 927 00:57:37,158 --> 00:57:40,116 - Have you ever done one of these before? - No, but it looks like fun, huh, man? 928 00:57:40,240 --> 00:57:41,449 Yeah. Real fun. 929 00:57:41,574 --> 00:57:43,199 All right, here, make sure you get a good shot. 930 00:57:43,323 --> 00:57:45,697 Wait, I thought you didn't want to send Gina any more videos. 931 00:57:45,822 --> 00:57:48,030 I changed my mind, all right? Wait till she sees this one. 932 00:57:48,155 --> 00:57:50,113 - Nice! - Kev, come on. 933 00:57:50,196 --> 00:57:53,112 What's happening? You don't have to do this. 934 00:57:53,820 --> 00:57:56,278 Yeah, I do, Morris, all right? And you should lighten up and do one, too. 935 00:57:56,361 --> 00:57:58,194 Yeah, fuck nugget. 936 00:57:58,319 --> 00:58:01,026 Me? No way. That's a bad idea. 937 00:58:01,151 --> 00:58:04,275 - I'm already on thin ice with the Dean. - Whatever! 938 00:58:05,525 --> 00:58:09,941 You know what? I think I'm gonna go and find something non-alcoholic to drink. 939 00:58:10,024 --> 00:58:11,148 You guys have fun puking on yourselves. 940 00:58:11,273 --> 00:58:14,606 Okay. We will, buddy. I love you! Call me later. Be safe. 941 00:58:14,689 --> 00:58:18,104 - All right, whatever. Let's do this thing! - All right. 942 00:58:18,188 --> 00:58:21,103 Yeah. Be careful with him, guys. He's fragile. 943 00:58:21,187 --> 00:58:23,478 Bitches spit, Kev. Bitches spit. 944 00:58:35,224 --> 00:58:38,473 - Hey, is there alcohol in there? - In the punch? 945 00:58:40,681 --> 00:58:43,306 No, not at all. 946 00:58:43,430 --> 00:58:47,888 In fact, this is non-alcoholic for our designated drivers. 947 00:58:49,304 --> 00:58:52,595 - Really? - Big old Bearcat wouldn't lie to you. 948 00:58:53,419 --> 00:58:56,752 After last night, I feel like we bonded. 949 00:58:55,535 --> 00:58:59,742 In fact, if you don't believe me, have a taste. 950 00:59:02,774 --> 00:59:04,607 Hey, can I have some punch? 951 00:59:05,033 --> 00:59:07,282 Hey, safety first. 952 00:59:07,865 --> 00:59:10,114 - Another designated driver. - Thank you. 953 00:59:13,080 --> 00:59:18,703 - Wow! It's pretty good. - Drink up, buddy. You look thirsty. 954 00:59:18,828 --> 00:59:21,827 Thanks, Bearcat. You're all right. 955 00:59:21,952 --> 00:59:24,701 Listen to me. If anybody, 956 00:59:24,826 --> 00:59:29,242 and I mean anybody, fucks with you tonight, find me. 957 00:59:29,366 --> 00:59:30,825 I got your front. 958 00:59:30,949 --> 00:59:34,240 - Don't you mean "back"? - If that's how you want it. 959 00:59:35,449 --> 00:59:38,239 If you feel something moving in your pants, don't fight it! 960 00:59:39,322 --> 00:59:40,780 Who's fucking on my floor? 961 00:59:45,279 --> 00:59:47,986 - Heather! - I know you! 962 00:59:48,069 --> 00:59:50,360 GIRL: Hey, Teague, who's the blonde? 963 00:59:51,194 --> 00:59:55,234 Hey! Kendall! I'm glad you made it. Let me get you girls some beers. 964 00:59:55,359 --> 00:59:57,650 No, thanks, Teague. Not now. 965 00:59:57,734 --> 01:00:01,940 If you're looking for who I think you're looking for, don't bother. 966 01:00:02,065 --> 01:00:04,814 He's a loser, him and his little friends. 967 01:00:05,231 --> 01:00:08,855 Are you really that jealous? 968 01:00:09,980 --> 01:00:13,396 You had your chance, Teague, and thank God you blew it. 969 01:00:26,035 --> 01:00:28,077 (ROCK MUSIC PLAYING) 970 01:00:30,867 --> 01:00:33,325 - Yeah! - I wanna drink! I wanna drink! 971 01:00:34,325 --> 01:00:37,699 - Fuck, yeah! - You are so awesome! 972 01:00:37,824 --> 01:00:39,824 - Verne! - Verne! Hey, Verne! 973 01:00:39,948 --> 01:00:42,864 - Fuck you, prick! - I love you, too! 974 01:00:42,947 --> 01:00:45,446 - Hey, man, did you get that one? - Dude, you fucking drained the thing! 975 01:00:45,530 --> 01:00:49,404 - Holy shit. Oh, hey, hey! Look, look! - Ladies! 976 01:00:49,529 --> 01:00:51,861 Hey, Kendall! Kendall, hey! 977 01:00:51,945 --> 01:00:53,194 What's up, ladies? 978 01:00:53,319 --> 01:00:54,652 We were hoping you guys would show up. 979 01:00:54,735 --> 01:00:58,110 Yeah, we waited at the bar tonight for, like, two hours. 980 01:00:58,193 --> 01:00:59,776 Yeah. Way to blow us off. 981 01:00:59,860 --> 01:01:03,816 Amy, girl, you know I'd never blow you off. 982 01:01:03,941 --> 01:01:08,315 Especially last night, you know, after the lesbian thing. 983 01:01:08,398 --> 01:01:11,064 Hey, hey, look, the bouncer wouldn't let us in, 'cause our IDs sucked. 984 01:01:11,189 --> 01:01:13,146 We got in just fine, and we don't even have ID. 985 01:01:13,272 --> 01:01:17,312 Yeah, but, see, you guys got tits, and those things are like gold. 986 01:01:18,062 --> 01:01:20,645 Hey, but you know what? You know what we're gonna do? 987 01:01:20,727 --> 01:01:25,102 Let us make it up to you, okay, 'cause you still need those beers, right? 988 01:01:25,227 --> 01:01:28,351 - I think you've had plenty. - Me? Come on! Please! 989 01:01:30,267 --> 01:01:32,266 I'm just getting started. 990 01:01:34,015 --> 01:01:36,015 All right, well, I'm gonna get you those beers. 991 01:01:36,139 --> 01:01:37,139 We're gonna get you the beers. 992 01:01:37,223 --> 01:01:39,181 - So don't move. - Let's go! 993 01:01:39,639 --> 01:01:42,555 - Excuse me, boobies! Look out! - Wait. Where's Morris? 994 01:01:48,011 --> 01:01:49,261 (HORN HONKING) 995 01:01:50,010 --> 01:01:51,593 - Cocksucking motherfucker! - Fuck you! 996 01:01:51,677 --> 01:01:54,135 Come on back and fight like a man! 997 01:01:57,134 --> 01:01:58,925 MAN: (SINGING) So, let's go 998 01:01:59,134 --> 01:02:01,007 And get wasted 999 01:02:01,966 --> 01:02:04,382 Let's go Let's go 1000 01:02:04,465 --> 01:02:07,005 And get high 1001 01:02:07,131 --> 01:02:08,630 Let's go 1002 01:02:10,713 --> 01:02:12,213 (EXCLAIMS) 1003 01:02:12,296 --> 01:02:14,711 Look who's here! Little high school friends. 1004 01:02:14,795 --> 01:02:17,961 Hey, come on, don't be a dick, Teague. Fill us up. 1005 01:02:18,503 --> 01:02:20,710 - What'd you say? - I said fill us up, fucktard. 1006 01:02:20,794 --> 01:02:22,335 Or is that too complicated for your small... 1007 01:02:22,459 --> 01:02:25,583 Hey, hey! Hey, hey! He meant that in the nicest way possible. 1008 01:02:25,708 --> 01:02:28,958 Stop being an asshole, Teague, and give them our beer. 1009 01:02:29,083 --> 01:02:32,915 So you want some beer for your ladies? 1010 01:02:34,206 --> 01:02:35,497 All right. 1011 01:02:37,288 --> 01:02:41,579 You know what? You guys put up with a lot of shit these past couple of days, 1012 01:02:41,703 --> 01:02:43,953 and you deserve this beer. 1013 01:02:45,078 --> 01:02:47,119 In fact, hold on. 1014 01:02:48,952 --> 01:02:49,952 (GROANS) 1015 01:02:51,159 --> 01:02:53,617 Hey, everybody, listen up! I've got a quick announcement to make! 1016 01:02:53,742 --> 01:02:57,533 - Lay off, Teague. - Trust me, Kendall. You're gonna love this. 1017 01:02:58,324 --> 01:03:02,781 See these guys right here? These guys are pre-frosh. 1018 01:03:02,906 --> 01:03:04,072 (CROWD BOOING) 1019 01:03:04,364 --> 01:03:08,071 - That's right! They're high school kids! - High school? 1020 01:03:08,154 --> 01:03:09,196 High school? 1021 01:03:09,279 --> 01:03:14,361 All right, come on now, once upon a time we were high school kids, too. 1022 01:03:15,361 --> 01:03:17,652 - No way! - Come on. 1023 01:03:17,777 --> 01:03:18,734 Grow up! 1024 01:03:18,859 --> 01:03:20,567 All right, shut up! 1025 01:03:21,192 --> 01:03:22,900 These guys are cool. 1026 01:03:23,316 --> 01:03:26,482 They're good guys who want a beer and a good time. 1027 01:03:27,524 --> 01:03:29,107 Give them one. 1028 01:03:29,232 --> 01:03:31,690 Here it is. Your beer. 1029 01:03:42,019 --> 01:03:46,227 What the fuck? Stop peeing on me! What are you doing? 1030 01:03:46,310 --> 01:03:48,059 Would you fucking stop peeing on me, you little shit? 1031 01:03:48,184 --> 01:03:52,849 Say what? Nobody talks to my bear kitten like that! 1032 01:03:52,933 --> 01:03:55,932 What me and him got, you'll never understand. 1033 01:03:56,057 --> 01:03:57,390 Pick me up, bitch! 1034 01:03:57,473 --> 01:03:59,681 Stop calling me bitch! This is my frat. You're embarrassing me. 1035 01:03:59,764 --> 01:04:01,180 And now let's get fucked up! 1036 01:04:01,263 --> 01:04:02,555 (CROWD CHEERING) 1037 01:04:10,886 --> 01:04:13,344 - Kendall, wait! - Nice one. 1038 01:04:18,425 --> 01:04:21,383 - Oh, my word, that was fun. - (LAUGHING) That's not dancing. 1039 01:04:21,508 --> 01:04:22,591 (CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING) 1040 01:04:22,715 --> 01:04:24,298 They can't dance. 1041 01:04:25,048 --> 01:04:26,506 Jim! Look out! 1042 01:04:28,714 --> 01:04:33,213 - Sweet Jesus! That was close! - Hi! Dean Chandler! 1043 01:04:33,338 --> 01:04:35,712 Just the guy I wanted to talk to. 1044 01:04:38,586 --> 01:04:41,502 CHANDLER: Oh, my God! 1045 01:04:50,540 --> 01:04:51,998 (ALL URINATING) 1046 01:04:52,123 --> 01:04:53,790 I'm so dead. 1047 01:04:53,915 --> 01:04:58,121 Yeah, well, at least you didn't get beer poured on you by about 300 people. 1048 01:04:58,247 --> 01:04:59,996 Yeah, Kendall looked pretty pissed back there, huh? 1049 01:05:00,080 --> 01:05:01,080 Pissed? 1050 01:05:01,204 --> 01:05:05,827 Dude, it looked like she was gonna shoot fucking daggers out of her eyeballs. 1051 01:05:08,661 --> 01:05:10,868 Kev? Kev! Where you going? 1052 01:05:10,952 --> 01:05:13,784 I'm gonna go apologize. You coming with me? 1053 01:05:26,072 --> 01:05:30,071 Hey! Shut the fuck up! This is my favorite part! Watch this shit! 1054 01:05:40,692 --> 01:05:41,984 MAN: Dude. 1055 01:05:43,650 --> 01:05:45,608 BEARCAT: There's Goose! There's Goose! 1056 01:05:45,733 --> 01:05:46,941 (LAUGHING) 1057 01:05:47,233 --> 01:05:49,731 Shit, that's funny! Hey, play that shit again! 1058 01:05:49,815 --> 01:05:51,356 Play it in slow-mo! 1059 01:05:51,481 --> 01:05:54,939 - You guys do this shit for fun? - All day, every day. 1060 01:05:55,064 --> 01:05:58,229 - Butch up, Goose! Stop being a pussy! - Yeah! 1061 01:06:01,394 --> 01:06:05,560 I just saw those high school kids heading over to the sorority house. 1062 01:06:06,143 --> 01:06:07,518 Just saying. 1063 01:06:12,391 --> 01:06:13,350 No way. 1064 01:06:13,433 --> 01:06:14,599 (KNOCKING ON WINDOW) 1065 01:06:16,973 --> 01:06:18,306 What? 1066 01:06:18,389 --> 01:06:22,347 - Can I talk to you alone for a minute? - Why? So you can tell me more lies? 1067 01:06:22,472 --> 01:06:24,638 - No, thanks. - Hey! Wait! 1068 01:06:27,970 --> 01:06:31,677 - Come on, I leave tomorrow. - You know, I thought you were different. 1069 01:06:31,803 --> 01:06:35,426 But you're just like the rest of them. Have a nice drive. 1070 01:06:38,051 --> 01:06:39,550 College blows! 1071 01:06:41,133 --> 01:06:43,299 You think I'll ever see Heather again? 1072 01:06:43,382 --> 01:06:46,381 Probably not, Morris. I pretty much blew it for all of us. 1073 01:06:46,465 --> 01:06:48,464 So that was my last shot to score with Amy. 1074 01:06:48,547 --> 01:06:50,630 All I wanna do is bang one college chick this weekend. 1075 01:06:50,713 --> 01:06:52,797 Is that so much to ask? 1076 01:06:52,880 --> 01:06:54,379 What the hell? 1077 01:06:57,128 --> 01:06:59,087 MORRIS: My glasses! My glasses! 1078 01:07:01,877 --> 01:07:04,751 Get them in the van! Get them in. 1079 01:07:05,334 --> 01:07:06,709 Get them in. 1080 01:07:17,206 --> 01:07:20,663 - TEAGUE: You pukes are worthless. - Worthless! 1081 01:07:20,788 --> 01:07:24,578 Nothing but a bunch of goddamn high school kids! 1082 01:07:24,703 --> 01:07:27,286 Goddamn high school kids! 1083 01:07:32,160 --> 01:07:36,450 I can't believe we're even out here wasting our time on you. 1084 01:07:36,533 --> 01:07:39,324 Wasting our motherfucking time! 1085 01:07:39,449 --> 01:07:42,157 Dude, what's with the repeating? It's fucking killing me. 1086 01:07:42,281 --> 01:07:46,655 Sorry! It's stupid. Can I get a hug? 1087 01:07:49,197 --> 01:07:52,570 Just go stand over there and look fucking mean. 1088 01:07:52,695 --> 01:07:53,737 Do the growl thing. 1089 01:07:54,361 --> 01:07:58,153 Come on, man, I'll jeeper creeper these motherfuckers. Hug me. 1090 01:07:59,985 --> 01:08:01,193 (BARKING) 1091 01:08:08,691 --> 01:08:13,148 We got beer to drink. So it's been fun, kind of. 1092 01:08:14,856 --> 01:08:16,647 By the way, 1093 01:08:16,771 --> 01:08:20,979 have you guys ever seen a pig stampede before? 1094 01:08:21,104 --> 01:08:23,978 - Fucked up. Pig stampede. - Pig stampede! 1095 01:08:24,061 --> 01:08:26,269 - ALL: Pig stampede! Pig stampede! - Pig stampede! Pig stampede! 1096 01:08:26,352 --> 01:08:28,977 - Pig stampede! Pig stampede! - Pig stampede! Pig stampede! 1097 01:08:29,101 --> 01:08:32,225 - Pig stampede! Pig stampede! - Pig stampede! Pig stampede! 1098 01:08:32,350 --> 01:08:34,016 (PIGS SQUEALING) 1099 01:08:41,681 --> 01:08:44,930 BEARCAT: Get out of the front seat, bitch! I called shotgun! 1100 01:08:48,470 --> 01:08:49,762 (GUN FIRES) 1101 01:08:49,970 --> 01:08:51,719 Shit! Run! 1102 01:08:55,010 --> 01:08:56,135 (GROANING) 1103 01:09:00,842 --> 01:09:03,715 Keep running, you little sicko pig fuckers! 1104 01:09:04,425 --> 01:09:05,757 (GUN FIRES) 1105 01:09:09,172 --> 01:09:10,214 This sucks. 1106 01:09:10,339 --> 01:09:13,754 Yeah, thanks for stating the obvious, Carter. 1107 01:09:13,838 --> 01:09:18,628 You know, I never thought I'd say this, but I think I actually miss high school. 1108 01:09:20,752 --> 01:09:22,585 - What, Kevin? - Nothing. Forget it. 1109 01:09:22,669 --> 01:09:24,502 Don't forget it. If you have something to say, fucking say it! 1110 01:09:24,626 --> 01:09:27,042 Okay, fine, you want it? Here it is. You're full of shit, Carter! 1111 01:09:27,167 --> 01:09:28,167 I'm full of shit? 1112 01:09:28,292 --> 01:09:30,500 Yeah! You're always talking such a big fucking game, man. 1113 01:09:30,625 --> 01:09:33,915 You know what? Newsflash! He's never even been laid. 1114 01:09:35,998 --> 01:09:41,288 - So, that's how it's gonna be, huh, Kevin? - No, no, no. Wait. You're still a virgin? 1115 01:09:41,372 --> 01:09:45,537 - (LAUGHING) Man! This is great. - Yeah, whatever, Morris! Shut up! 1116 01:09:45,662 --> 01:09:47,120 You know what, Kev? Stop dumping on us 1117 01:09:47,245 --> 01:09:49,244 'cause the weekend didn't turn out the way you thought it would! 1118 01:09:49,327 --> 01:09:51,035 Yeah, probably because I've been listening to you too much. 1119 01:09:51,160 --> 01:09:55,534 Yeah, 'cause it was my idea to try to prove Gina wrong and lie to Kendall! 1120 01:09:55,659 --> 01:09:58,449 - That was all you, man! - Guys, come on. Let's not fight. 1121 01:09:58,533 --> 01:10:00,949 You know what? Stay out of it, Morris! You're not part of this! 1122 01:10:01,032 --> 01:10:02,407 I'm not part of this? 1123 01:10:02,490 --> 01:10:04,490 This was supposed to be yours and my weekend here. 1124 01:10:04,573 --> 01:10:06,073 Dude, whatever. I didn't mean it like that. 1125 01:10:06,155 --> 01:10:08,030 No, but while we're comparing shitty weekends, 1126 01:10:08,155 --> 01:10:09,197 here's one for you. 1127 01:10:09,321 --> 01:10:11,946 My face got written on before my scholarship interview, 1128 01:10:12,071 --> 01:10:13,945 a pig just snacked on my nuts, 1129 01:10:14,070 --> 01:10:15,945 and, oh, yeah, I almost forgot about this one, 1130 01:10:16,070 --> 01:10:17,569 I puked on the Dean's car, 1131 01:10:17,695 --> 01:10:19,986 which pretty much means that I'm not getting my scholarship! 1132 01:10:20,110 --> 01:10:21,402 God, Morris! Ever since you got here 1133 01:10:21,485 --> 01:10:23,609 you whine, whine, whine about your fucking scholarship. 1134 01:10:23,734 --> 01:10:24,817 You don't even want to go here. 1135 01:10:24,942 --> 01:10:27,441 It's not about what I want! You know how my parents are! 1136 01:10:27,566 --> 01:10:29,941 Yeah, well, then grow some fucking balls and stand up to them. 1137 01:10:30,065 --> 01:10:31,440 It's not that easy. 1138 01:10:31,524 --> 01:10:33,773 Hey, man, what's next? They're gonna choose what job you take? 1139 01:10:33,897 --> 01:10:36,689 - What girl you marry? - Dude, lay off, Kev! 1140 01:10:37,522 --> 01:10:39,312 That's a first. You're sticking up for Morris, man? 1141 01:10:39,437 --> 01:10:42,312 - You bag on him more than anyone. - That's not true and you fucking know it! 1142 01:10:42,436 --> 01:10:43,603 Ha! 1143 01:10:44,561 --> 01:10:46,936 Okay, you know what, Morris? Fuck you! 1144 01:10:47,018 --> 01:10:49,518 That's the last time I ever have your fucking back! 1145 01:10:49,643 --> 01:10:54,016 You know what? Fuck you, too, Kevin, for dumping all your bullshit on us. 1146 01:10:57,766 --> 01:10:59,515 All right, fine, Morris. Yeah, walk away with him. 1147 01:10:59,640 --> 01:11:02,265 Why don't you hold his hand while you're at it? 1148 01:11:02,348 --> 01:11:06,388 - Fuck you, Kevin. - Dropping the F-bomb, big man. 1149 01:11:06,471 --> 01:11:08,595 What is that, the first time you ever used it? 1150 01:11:08,720 --> 01:11:10,720 I'm telling your parents! 1151 01:11:11,970 --> 01:11:13,053 Fuck! 1152 01:11:13,136 --> 01:11:15,386 MAN: (SINGING) We do not know 1153 01:11:18,842 --> 01:11:19,968 How things work 1154 01:11:19,968 --> 01:11:20,509 How things work 1155 01:11:23,633 --> 01:11:26,840 We do not know 1156 01:11:30,714 --> 01:11:33,089 Where you go 1157 01:11:38,711 --> 01:11:40,045 In the night 1158 01:11:42,794 --> 01:11:44,418 Through the door 1159 01:11:46,584 --> 01:11:50,708 Through the door that holds you 1160 01:11:54,457 --> 01:11:58,623 Through the door that holds you 1161 01:12:01,539 --> 01:12:03,538 Out of the blue 1162 01:12:10,619 --> 01:12:13,910 We do not know 1163 01:12:18,534 --> 01:12:22,533 The door that holds you 1164 01:12:25,448 --> 01:12:27,572 Silent as glue 1165 01:12:30,030 --> 01:12:32,321 We stand under it 1166 01:12:33,112 --> 01:12:35,529 But we don't understand it 1167 01:12:37,945 --> 01:12:40,027 The door that holds you 1168 01:12:45,317 --> 01:12:48,024 Silent as glue 1169 01:12:50,233 --> 01:12:55,481 And stars fall on 1170 01:12:58,813 --> 01:13:03,937 Stars fall on 1171 01:13:05,561 --> 01:13:08,393 Silent as glue 1172 01:13:28,596 --> 01:13:32,720 - Nice look. - This? Yeah, thanks. 1173 01:13:35,803 --> 01:13:36,968 So... 1174 01:13:41,759 --> 01:13:44,050 - Look, about what happened... - Don't even go there. 1175 01:13:44,133 --> 01:13:47,882 - Just let me explain. - I really don't want to hear it, Kevin. 1176 01:13:47,965 --> 01:13:49,839 I don't even know who you are. 1177 01:13:49,923 --> 01:13:52,381 Yeah, to be honest, I'm not even sure I know anymore. 1178 01:13:52,464 --> 01:13:55,005 Maybe it's time you figure that out. 1179 01:13:57,004 --> 01:14:01,878 You know, high school, college, it wouldn't have mattered to me. 1180 01:14:02,003 --> 01:14:04,252 Yeah, I know. It's so stupid. 1181 01:14:04,377 --> 01:14:08,417 You know, I came down here thinking I needed to change who I was. 1182 01:14:09,584 --> 01:14:11,667 Lying to you was just part of it. 1183 01:14:11,792 --> 01:14:14,374 I thought you were pretty great. Why would you want to change that? 1184 01:14:14,499 --> 01:14:15,956 I don't know. 1185 01:14:17,374 --> 01:14:19,331 You don't know? 1186 01:14:19,414 --> 01:14:22,913 Like, I mean, I kind of liked who I was, or I am. 1187 01:14:23,038 --> 01:14:26,204 You know, a little uptight at times, responsible. 1188 01:14:30,495 --> 01:14:33,327 God, I really screwed up this weekend. 1189 01:14:33,410 --> 01:14:35,910 You know, now Morris and Carter are pissed at each other. 1190 01:14:36,034 --> 01:14:37,992 They're both pissed at me. 1191 01:14:40,116 --> 01:14:44,074 You just seem like the kind of person who doesn't make mistakes. 1192 01:14:44,448 --> 01:14:45,490 Ha! 1193 01:14:47,572 --> 01:14:50,572 A couple weeks ago... Brace yourself. 1194 01:14:53,029 --> 01:14:54,946 I hooked up with Teague. 1195 01:14:55,071 --> 01:14:57,653 - Huge mistake. - Yeah, he kinda told me. 1196 01:14:59,694 --> 01:15:02,027 Why not? He told the whole campus. 1197 01:15:04,609 --> 01:15:07,400 Why'd you do it? I mean, with a guy like Teague? 1198 01:15:07,525 --> 01:15:10,149 - He is so... - For all the wrong reasons. 1199 01:15:11,899 --> 01:15:14,773 He was good-looking. He made me feel special, 1200 01:15:16,522 --> 01:15:18,980 and since he was a really good liar, 1201 01:15:19,104 --> 01:15:24,770 he made believe that it was more than just a one-night thing. 1202 01:15:27,519 --> 01:15:29,685 - Ouch. - Yeah. 1203 01:15:31,093 --> 01:15:34,343 It was kind of why I freaked out tonight. 1204 01:15:36,467 --> 01:15:41,924 I found out that you lied and I assumed that you were just like Teague. 1205 01:15:42,049 --> 01:15:45,173 Oh, God, please, look, I'm nothing like that guy. 1206 01:15:47,380 --> 01:15:49,796 I'm really sorry about everything. 1207 01:15:52,046 --> 01:15:54,502 Is this the real Kevin talking? 1208 01:15:54,586 --> 01:15:57,919 Or is this the new and improved college Kevin talking? 1209 01:15:58,044 --> 01:15:59,168 No, this is the real me, 1210 01:15:59,251 --> 01:16:02,834 the uptight, responsible, un-fun high school one. 1211 01:16:05,083 --> 01:16:08,249 Good. Apology accepted then. 1212 01:16:12,414 --> 01:16:15,622 All right, well, I gotta go find Carter and Morris. 1213 01:16:17,121 --> 01:16:21,370 Before you go, can I please give you some clothes? 1214 01:16:25,535 --> 01:16:29,367 - Morris? Morris, wake up! - Kevin? 1215 01:16:31,575 --> 01:16:34,033 - What's with the... - Where's Carter? 1216 01:16:40,448 --> 01:16:44,946 Look, you guys. I've been thinking all night. I just want to say I'm sorry 1217 01:16:45,905 --> 01:16:47,654 about everything. 1218 01:16:47,737 --> 01:16:50,819 - You said some harsh things, man. - Yeah, I know. 1219 01:16:51,903 --> 01:16:55,985 I've realized a lot about myself this weekend, and you guys. 1220 01:16:56,110 --> 01:16:57,984 I didn't mean what I said. 1221 01:16:58,067 --> 01:17:00,650 I've just been so hung up on what Gina told me 1222 01:17:00,734 --> 01:17:05,191 that I haven't even stopped to think that, you know, maybe she was wrong. 1223 01:17:06,899 --> 01:17:07,898 You guys are my best friends. 1224 01:17:08,023 --> 01:17:11,688 I'm not gonna let some stupid weekend at college ruin that. 1225 01:17:13,396 --> 01:17:17,187 Whatever, man. It's cool. I like the boring Kevin more anyway. 1226 01:17:17,479 --> 01:17:19,436 Thanks, Carter. I think. 1227 01:17:22,894 --> 01:17:24,185 Morris? 1228 01:17:25,851 --> 01:17:30,224 We all said some stuff, you know? No biggie. I'm over it. 1229 01:17:31,183 --> 01:17:34,098 Sorry I, like, freaked out and lost my shit. 1230 01:17:40,430 --> 01:17:41,804 You guys, 1231 01:17:43,888 --> 01:17:46,261 that was so gay. 1232 01:17:46,386 --> 01:17:49,385 That was like the third gayest thing we've done this weekend. 1233 01:17:49,510 --> 01:17:52,634 - It's getting out of hand. - All right, look. Does this mean we're cool? 1234 01:17:52,718 --> 01:17:55,134 Yeah, man. For sure. 1235 01:17:55,217 --> 01:17:58,216 Okay! So now that we're done arguing like a bunch of chicks, 1236 01:17:58,300 --> 01:18:02,673 - what the hell are we doing out here? - Go ahead and look for yourselves. 1237 01:18:06,797 --> 01:18:09,005 - Is that all our stuff? - Yeah. 1238 01:18:09,088 --> 01:18:13,420 - They even threw in all our rubbers. - Those taint-sucking ball junkies. 1239 01:18:14,836 --> 01:18:15,878 Yep. 1240 01:18:33,372 --> 01:18:35,997 - Can we go home now? - No. Not yet. 1241 01:18:36,122 --> 01:18:39,329 - Dude, why the fuck would we stay? - The weekend's over, Kevin. 1242 01:18:39,454 --> 01:18:41,037 It's pretty clear we're not wanted here anymore. 1243 01:18:41,162 --> 01:18:42,995 Come on, you guys. We've got to stand up for ourselves. 1244 01:18:43,120 --> 01:18:45,286 No, we don't. We need to go home. 1245 01:18:45,369 --> 01:18:46,660 Come on, man. After all the shit we've been through? 1246 01:18:46,785 --> 01:18:49,492 We can't leave like this, Morris. 1247 01:18:49,576 --> 01:18:52,992 Besides, I can't stand up to these fraternity assholes on my own. 1248 01:18:53,075 --> 01:18:57,990 All right, fuck it! If I'm not gonna get laid, I might as well get revenge, right? 1249 01:19:01,531 --> 01:19:04,530 Come on, Morris. We can't do this without you. 1250 01:19:06,113 --> 01:19:09,570 Come on, man. Just think about it. Who wrote "hairy balls" on your face? 1251 01:19:09,695 --> 01:19:11,194 - Fraternity guys. - Yeah. 1252 01:19:11,320 --> 01:19:13,694 Who made you wash their car, drink out of some dude's belly button 1253 01:19:13,819 --> 01:19:15,319 and puke all over the Dean's car? 1254 01:19:15,444 --> 01:19:16,444 CARTER: Who stripped you naked 1255 01:19:16,568 --> 01:19:18,693 and made you feel like a little bitch all weekend long? 1256 01:19:18,817 --> 01:19:22,483 - Fraternity guys! - Yeah, that's right, the fraternity guys. 1257 01:19:22,567 --> 01:19:23,983 Look, man, you want to stand up to your parents? 1258 01:19:24,108 --> 01:19:27,273 Why don't you start by taking a stand here first? 1259 01:19:27,773 --> 01:19:30,273 Let's take those motherfuckers down. 1260 01:19:47,976 --> 01:19:49,850 Fuck! 1261 01:19:57,889 --> 01:20:00,306 One, two. 1262 01:20:02,138 --> 01:20:04,929 - Four, five... - Dude, open the door! 1263 01:21:21,823 --> 01:21:23,281 Get over here! 1264 01:21:36,610 --> 01:21:37,776 (GROANING) 1265 01:21:47,149 --> 01:21:50,730 Five, four, three, two... 1266 01:21:51,897 --> 01:21:53,021 (SHOUTING) 1267 01:21:56,146 --> 01:22:00,270 - Dude, are you sure this is going to work? - Trust me. It's physics. 1268 01:22:26,054 --> 01:22:27,387 Fuck. 1269 01:22:44,507 --> 01:22:46,756 - What the fuck? - Nothing's happening. 1270 01:22:46,881 --> 01:22:48,339 Maybe the matches blew out. 1271 01:22:50,130 --> 01:22:51,463 (BEEPING) 1272 01:22:51,963 --> 01:22:53,421 (ALARM RINGING) 1273 01:23:07,166 --> 01:23:08,499 What the... 1274 01:23:12,165 --> 01:23:14,248 Shit! Fuck! 1275 01:23:18,372 --> 01:23:19,871 What the fuck? 1276 01:23:37,408 --> 01:23:38,740 Fucking pig! 1277 01:23:40,115 --> 01:23:41,615 Fucking shit! 1278 01:23:44,905 --> 01:23:46,363 (PIG SQUEALING) 1279 01:23:48,904 --> 01:23:50,112 Oh, shit! 1280 01:23:53,611 --> 01:23:57,068 - What the fuck is happening? - There's pigs everywhere! 1281 01:24:02,525 --> 01:24:04,774 Fuck me! God damn it! 1282 01:24:08,023 --> 01:24:09,523 What the fuck? 1283 01:24:11,439 --> 01:24:12,730 It's beer! 1284 01:24:14,605 --> 01:24:16,521 It's fucking beer, man! 1285 01:24:28,309 --> 01:24:30,433 (SIRENS BLARING) 1286 01:24:36,890 --> 01:24:40,056 Hey, you guys, you got to come outside! 1287 01:24:40,181 --> 01:24:43,180 I think the Beta Chi House is on fire or something. 1288 01:25:04,590 --> 01:25:06,048 Fuck you, pig! 1289 01:25:10,755 --> 01:25:12,547 Nice hair cut, buddy! 1290 01:25:16,420 --> 01:25:18,003 - Bearcat. - Wait! 1291 01:25:21,169 --> 01:25:24,543 Wait! Can I flush first, guys? Come on! 1292 01:25:24,626 --> 01:25:27,750 You boys are in a world of shit now. Disturbing the peace, 1293 01:25:27,875 --> 01:25:30,208 destruction of property, stealing farm animals! 1294 01:25:30,291 --> 01:25:33,457 What the hell are you talking about? It wasn't us! 1295 01:25:35,665 --> 01:25:40,288 - It was those fuckers right there! - Officer, we don't even go here. 1296 01:25:40,413 --> 01:25:42,412 No. We're just a bunch of high school kids. 1297 01:25:42,538 --> 01:25:45,994 You know, Officer, frankly, I'm appalled at the behavior on this campus. 1298 01:25:46,119 --> 01:25:48,203 Motherfuckers! 1299 01:25:48,327 --> 01:25:49,661 Fuck you! 1300 01:25:49,744 --> 01:25:53,660 Careful there, buddy. You've got a little cut from a straight razor on your nipple. 1301 01:25:53,742 --> 01:25:55,325 Wait, wait! Wait! 1302 01:25:57,242 --> 01:25:59,116 - Where's my car? - MAN: Plastic pussy stole it! 1303 01:25:59,241 --> 01:26:00,615 Where's my fucking car? 1304 01:26:07,613 --> 01:26:09,530 This was donated by a group of our alumni. 1305 01:26:09,655 --> 01:26:12,278 This has made a very welcome addition to our campus. 1306 01:26:12,403 --> 01:26:15,986 And I'm sure that your child will embrace their studies... 1307 01:26:16,111 --> 01:26:19,860 Why don't we go ahead, guys? Just follow me. Come on, guys. 1308 01:26:25,942 --> 01:26:28,482 CARTER: So, wait. You're in high school? 1309 01:26:28,565 --> 01:26:31,981 AMY: Yeah. I just came here to visit for the weekend, like you guys. 1310 01:26:32,065 --> 01:26:36,397 - But you even drink like a college girl. - Really? Thanks. 1311 01:26:38,646 --> 01:26:43,811 - So I guess this is it, huh? - Well, it doesn't have to be. 1312 01:26:46,352 --> 01:26:47,643 Carter! 1313 01:26:50,226 --> 01:26:53,183 Spank me, tiger! Yeah! 1314 01:27:00,181 --> 01:27:03,347 - I guess I better... - Morris. 1315 01:27:06,763 --> 01:27:09,678 Think you're gonna go here next year? 1316 01:27:09,804 --> 01:27:13,011 After this weekend, I kind of feel like I already do. 1317 01:27:13,135 --> 01:27:16,551 Plus, I already have a girlfriend lined up, so... 1318 01:27:16,677 --> 01:27:18,634 Yeah? And who's that? 1319 01:27:20,676 --> 01:27:24,257 Someone I met. She plays a mean game of quarters. 1320 01:27:25,840 --> 01:27:30,255 So I guess that means I'll be getting my photography lessons after all. 1321 01:27:50,416 --> 01:27:53,832 - So that's everything. - I guess we should get on the road. 1322 01:27:53,915 --> 01:27:56,123 Wait. You know what? Hang on. 1323 01:28:05,578 --> 01:28:07,827 All right, guys. Let's go home. 1324 01:28:21,574 --> 01:28:23,448 Here comes trouble. 1325 01:28:23,531 --> 01:28:27,280 - Hey, Kevin. - Hey, Gina. 1326 01:28:27,364 --> 01:28:29,696 So I got your video message. 1327 01:28:30,279 --> 01:28:32,279 Looks like you guys had a pretty crazy weekend. 1328 01:28:32,404 --> 01:28:33,737 Hell, yeah! 1329 01:28:35,736 --> 01:28:37,486 - Yeah! - Breath mint. 1330 01:28:37,736 --> 01:28:39,777 (GIGGLING) 1331 01:28:39,860 --> 01:28:45,275 Anyway, well, it kind of made me think a lot 1332 01:28:45,359 --> 01:28:49,233 about you and me and, you know, us. 1333 01:28:50,981 --> 01:28:53,481 Why don't we just forget this whole break-up thing ever happened? 1334 01:28:53,564 --> 01:28:55,147 What do you say? 1335 01:28:56,939 --> 01:28:58,230 Well... 1336 01:29:01,520 --> 01:29:02,728 You know, 1337 01:29:04,645 --> 01:29:06,269 I don't think so. 1338 01:29:08,227 --> 01:29:11,392 - What? - Yeah, you see, I've moved on. 1339 01:29:13,350 --> 01:29:17,432 Moved on? We've only been broken up for, like, three days. 1340 01:29:17,557 --> 01:29:20,473 Yeah, well, a lot can happen in three days. 1341 01:29:20,848 --> 01:29:27,013 And, Gina, that guy you saw? Yeah, that's not really me. 1342 01:29:28,221 --> 01:29:30,553 Well, see you around. 1343 01:29:30,678 --> 01:29:33,844 And get a boob job, Gina. Lift. 1344 01:29:35,594 --> 01:29:39,384 Kevin! Wait! Seriously! 1345 01:29:44,133 --> 01:29:46,965 So what do you guys want to do next weekend? 1346 01:29:47,049 --> 01:29:50,048 Next weekend? Aren't you grounded for, like, the next six months? 1347 01:29:50,131 --> 01:29:53,130 Fuck that! No problem. I can just sneak out. 1348 01:29:54,796 --> 01:29:58,295 You know, I've got a cousin that goes to U of I. 1349 01:30:14,166 --> 01:30:17,207 I'll pay you $5 a sniff, either one of your farts. 1350 01:30:17,331 --> 01:30:20,955 I just want to cherish your gaseous fumes. 1351 01:30:21,080 --> 01:30:22,996 It can be a birthday present. My birthday's coming up! 1352 01:30:23,413 --> 01:30:25,162 Yeah! Lost my shoe. 1353 01:30:25,287 --> 01:30:26,745 (BOYS LAUGHING) 1354 01:30:27,953 --> 01:30:29,827 Dude, you gotta see the shots I got from last night's game. 1355 01:30:29,952 --> 01:30:32,368 I got one where Stoloff is mid-air right over the inset... 1356 01:30:32,494 --> 01:30:35,201 Insectercide? Whatever the hell... What the... 1357 01:30:35,284 --> 01:30:36,617 (STAMMERING) 1358 01:30:37,242 --> 01:30:40,991 Dean Chandler has denied our petition, and we're still on probation. 1359 01:30:41,116 --> 01:30:42,616 - Shit. - Yeah. 1360 01:30:42,782 --> 01:30:44,074 WOMAN: Okay, cut! 1361 01:30:44,157 --> 01:30:45,323 (ALL LAUGHING) 1362 01:30:46,490 --> 01:30:50,030 Our camping trips? Our... The school... 1363 01:30:50,113 --> 01:30:52,279 Thing that was awesome that we did together. Remember that? 1364 01:30:52,404 --> 01:30:54,862 It was you and me. What's the line? 1365 01:30:57,153 --> 01:31:00,610 Looks like my years of hard work have finally paid off! 1366 01:31:02,485 --> 01:31:03,443 KEVIN: What's the matter, Morris? 1367 01:31:03,526 --> 01:31:05,900 - I'm sorry. - It's okay. 1368 01:31:05,983 --> 01:31:09,649 I've taken some whip-its, you know, the cracker shit. 1369 01:31:10,857 --> 01:31:12,106 (ALL LAUGHING) 1370 01:31:13,564 --> 01:31:15,814 Whatever, man. You guys are lightweights. I don't feel shit. 1371 01:31:15,938 --> 01:31:20,313 - Mom's a lightweight. - Here... Fuck you, dude! 1372 01:31:21,854 --> 01:31:23,936 Well, it doesn't have to be. 1373 01:31:25,478 --> 01:31:26,894 (CREW LAUGHING) 1374 01:31:28,852 --> 01:31:30,143 Is that our stuff? 1375 01:31:30,268 --> 01:31:33,100 Yeah. They even threw all our rubbers in. 1376 01:31:33,933 --> 01:31:36,350 Those scrotum-eating baby rapers. 1377 01:31:38,474 --> 01:31:40,848 Those taint-sucking ball junkies. 1378 01:31:43,348 --> 01:31:44,638 (ALL LAUGHING) 1379 01:31:46,472 --> 01:31:48,929 Those jizz-guzzling monkey fuckers. 1380 01:31:53,969 --> 01:31:56,552 You sucked in Austin Powers. Mike Myers carried you. 1381 01:31:56,635 --> 01:31:58,634 You didn't even say nothing, bitch. 1382 01:31:58,760 --> 01:32:01,343 Dude, you're doing it wrong, anyway. You gotta flip it, bitch. 1383 01:32:01,467 --> 01:32:02,924 Fucking beat you... 1384 01:32:03,008 --> 01:32:04,549 (CREW CHEERING) 1385 01:32:05,883 --> 01:32:08,798 Dude, this is so much better than the brochure. 1386 01:32:08,923 --> 01:32:10,714 I know, man. I've got a good feeling about this. 1387 01:32:10,797 --> 01:32:15,172 - I'm sorry, K.B. just said he had a boner. - He said he had a boner. 1388 01:32:15,254 --> 01:32:16,588 WOMAN: Can we cut? Cut. 1389 01:32:17,171 --> 01:32:19,253 I've got to ask you a favor. 1390 01:32:20,170 --> 01:32:21,753 You know that book about the mice 1391 01:32:21,878 --> 01:32:25,044 that Miss Dangle is asking everybody to read? 1392 01:32:25,627 --> 01:32:28,209 - That's way too much cereal. - MAN: Swallow. 1393 01:32:30,126 --> 01:32:32,625 Twin powers, activate! 1394 01:32:33,874 --> 01:32:38,123 Form of a screaming... Screaming manimal! 1395 01:32:38,248 --> 01:32:39,747 (SCREAMING) 1396 01:32:42,413 --> 01:32:46,496 Bearcat's gay and he wants to do me 1397 01:32:47,662 --> 01:32:51,828 I'm gonna punch his face And then he'll sue me 1398 01:32:53,119 --> 01:32:56,951 I'm going home with pussy on my pee-pee 1399 01:32:58,158 --> 01:33:04,907 Gonna tell my friends That college is the shitty, yeah 1400 01:33:06,448 --> 01:33:07,906 Eat that shit 1401 01:33:07,989 --> 01:33:09,239 WOMAN: And cut! 1402 01:33:10,322 --> 01:33:11,571 (CREW CHEERING) 1403 01:34:14,053 --> 01:34:15,095 Subtitles by LeapinLar 1404 01:34:16,000 --> 01:34:19,099 Best watched using Open Subtitles MKV Player 111336