Original subtitles

- Previously on "Below Deck Med"...

- Daniel-san! Daniel-san!

- I'm so sick of him getting in the way of me doing my job.

- Jen, tie that line now. - As soon as you get any slack

on any of these lines, pull it in.

- Sháá, sháá, sháá, sháá. - Stay down.

- He's not gonna make it.

- [speaking indistinctly]

I've always got my eye on Bobby.

especially when he's without his top.

- And we're gonna call this the MVP tip.

Daniel-san, get over here.

- Thank you. - Good job.

- Hey, Danny, I'll take that.

[laughter]

- Am I supposed to, like, take it as a compliment

that you didn't try and get me fired?

- I just wasn't gonna be dobbed for a bad tip.

- And now you're worried about our fáááing tip.

- I don't know why you like to start drama, Hannah.

- Get the fááá away from me.

- Daniel, Daniel. - Keep stepping.

- What?

[horn blares]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- You think I have an ugly personality?

- Absolutely. - Look who everyone

fáááing hates on this boat, mate.

One nasty-ass personality.

- Guys, where did that all come from?

- I have a lot of loyalty towards Ben.

He's the only one that I can trust.

- I've put some money down. I'm gonna get her.

- Here, Danny, you can have that.

[laughter] - Daniel.

- Get these cameras off me, please.

Now, please. - Hannah, Hannah.

- Julia.

- Like, you gotta be professional.

- Dude, I'm off the clock.

There's no professionalism right now.

- Moving on, swiftly. - MVP, baby.

[laughter]

MVP. - Most valuable pussy.

- And you love to eat it too, baby.

- I try to help Danny. I try to stick up for him.

But he takes it too far.

- Drop it. Let's all drop it.

Okay, we're dropping it.

- Where did that come from?

- Ben said something to me, and Daniel turned around,

and he was like, "You know what?

Everywhere you fáááing go, honey, you just cause drama."

This is what happens in the galley all the time.

Something's going on between me and Ben, and he steps in.

So what did you say that we were gonna do?

- I said we were doing prawns for the main course.

- You did say the shrimp was the main--

- I said it a million times.

- He's taking Ben's side.

You're a fáááing pleb junior deckhand.

You have no business getting in the fáááing middle

of the chief steward and the chef.

I still have respect for Ben. - Yeah.

- But this one now, he's going fáááing down.

I will go out of my way now to annihilate that man.

Ah. What am I even doing?

I can't call him a man. He's fáááing 3'7".

- Let's go.

- Dude, here's the thing, though.

She always says something to someone else.

I'm just fed up with her.

- Look, mate, if you're rude to her,

you won't be able to help me anymore.

Danny has a mouth like a wind chime in a hurricane.

He's kinda digging himself in a bigger hole.

- I hate fake-ass fáááing people, man.

- [laughing] He's such a little sháá.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

Come on, put this in Hannah's bed.

This is really bad.

- Yes! - [speaks indistinctly]

Jen, we need a condom.

- Let's what?

- Where do I find a condom?

- There's none in there. Close it.

- You have one? - I have a condom I'll give you.

Jesus. - All right.

Sex ed. - You know how to use this?

- She's actually lost the plot. - Oh, my God.

No, you gotta hold it at the top and slide it down.

All crew, all crew, Sex Ed 101 is beginning in the crew mess.

You gotta let some more loose.

- You're really stretching this bad boy.

Like, break it.

- I guess the only time you'll catch me putting a condom on

is on a vegetable.

- So rubbery. - [laughs]

- Oh, sháá. Here she is.

- Where have you been? - As far away as I can

from Danny as possible. - I get it, babe.

- Ben, would you mind if we have a cigarette?

- Even you know that wasn't nice.

- What? What Danny did?

I didn't ask him to do that.

That came out of the blue.

- And secondly, all I asked you for tonight

was whether you would like to be work colleagues

or whether you'd like to be friends.

I'd like a really defined line.

One I will be emotionally invested in,

and one I will not.

- What's easier for me?

- It's probably easier for you

to be a work colleague of mine.

Maybe I thought we were friends,

and for him, I was just somebody that he worked with.

And that's fine too, but I want to know that then.

The reason I've been getting upset

is because I feel like we're friends.

- You see, when we're successful work colleagues,

we can be friends too.

- Okay. You're a work colleague then.

- Okay, well, I'll do that then.

- Wow.

- Let's reasonably look at this equation.

We almost had a full-on war

over the discrepancy of a word

labeling a dish.

Can you imagine if we were

romantically involved with each other?

- [sobbing]

Oh, my God.

[solemn electronic music]

♪ ♪

[sniffles]

[exhales deeply]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[sniffles and sighs]

- Well, don't you look dashing?

Did you get a cup of tea yet? - Mm-hmm.

- Okay. - I did.

- Look at all this.

- Bryan, this crew area is a mess.

- [exhales sharply]

- Could you please make sure that whoever

is on crew mess detail

keeps this place clean. - You got it, Captain.

I'm not gonna fail the captain,

and I'm gonna do whatever it takes

to make sure the job gets done and it gets done correctly.

- I believe it's Jules. - Oh.

- Lucky Jules. - Yeah.

- Bobby? - Huh?

- Can you come here for a sec?

- Oh, gah!

Yeah?

Oh, my God.

I got titty in my face.

Can I help you with anything?

- [laughing]

I'll just get out.

Pause for a second...

Smells good in here. - Does it?

- And see what happens.

- Come here. I need hugs. Honey, I'm so...

[both laugh]

Bobby, to me, is very pretty,

and he's someone to play with.

I didn't play with him before

because I didn't really know where it was going with Ben.

Mmm.

I'm definitely the type of person

that if I want something, I go out and get it.

So now, I'm gonna pick up the shiny toy.

- Mm-hmm. - [laughs]

- Daniel, Daniel, Bryan.

- Go for Daniel.

- Meet me in the sky lounge.

- Sure thing.

[upbeat music]

- So why don't you head outside? Take this pen and paper.

What I wanted to do is have you write down

what you think that I think we need to work on

to move forward with you.

I don't know what else I can do to work with Daniel.

I'm trying everything I can.

And now you went and did it behind our backs.

You're literally that stupid.

- Daniel, I want to see the supermodels.

Oh. [chuckles]

- There you go, man.

- But if this doesn't work,

I don't know what else will.

Make a list, and I'll be right out.

- So what happened last night after I left?

- Um, Ben pretty much tried to set him straight.

Like, "That was not your place to go there."

And we started calling him out on it,

or at least I did.

- I'm seriously making it my third job on this boat

to make his life a living fáááing hell.

Danny has got pictures of the charter guests...

and their asses on his phone. - Yeah.

- He was showing the other charter guests.

- Yeah. - Okay.

I think I'm gonna go and have a little chat with the captain.

Can you help me make his life a living hell?

- I already make his life a living hell.

- I know. Had to mention now that we've joined forces.

It's gonna be awesome.

- How's our list going?

- So here's what I got.

"Be less chatty with the guests.

Focus more on my team than the guests."

- Yeah, good. - "Keep my phone away.

"If a heated argument arises in a different department,

just don't jump in."

- Any other department is just none of our business.

- Yeah. I think those are the big--

the big key points.

- Yeah. So let's just work on that,

and let's have a good charter.

Now he's got no excuse

when he breaks those rules that he wrote down

that he knows I want him to do.

And hold on to that list. - Okay.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Julia's got a boyfriend. Hannah's flirting with me.

I don't know. It's a tough juggle.

- Is she okay? Have you seen her?

- Yeah. - Yeah?

She was livid last night.

- She pretty much wants to end Daniel-san.

- It's all just too much drama for me to take.

It's becoming quite tiresome and draining.

- I did. I needed it.

- What'd you do?

And got away from you crazy people.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- It's payback time, honey.

Have you got a second?

Um...

I feel the need to bring something to your attention.

- M'kay.

- Danny has been taking photos of charter guests,

and this last charter, he has

been showing other charter guests

photos of the girls from our previous charters.

- Showing the clients?

[tense music]

- Discretion is number one in this industry,

and, you know, the amount I've seen

on the boats I've worked on, I don't talk about it

because that's what they pay me for.

That is such an invasion of privacy

on a place that they come to feel secure and safe.

It's pretty much the opposite

of everything we do in yachting,

and it's just getting to be a little bit too much now.

Usually that's something you'd get the boot for pretty quickly.

So, I just wanted to give you the heads-up.

- Okay. - Thank you.

- I've never had anybody that's as ethically

professionally challenged as he is.

Danny, Danny, Mark.

- Go for Daniel.

- Could you respond to the upper salon, please?

- Sure thing, Captain. Be there in a moment.

- Thank you.

- Oh, hey, Cap.

- We need to sweep this up. - Okay, do you want to?

- No.

- You are going way too fáááing far.

- You need to chill out.

- You don't speak to her like that.

- Get out of my face right now.

- What the fááá is wrong with you?

[upbeat music]

- Oh, hey, Cap.

- Yeah. It's come to my attention

that you may be taking pictures of guests

and then even going as far as showing them to other guests.

- I probably shouldn't have done that.

- Mm-mm. - No.

- You know, what we're all about is discretion...

- Yeah. - And confidentiality.

What happens on a yacht stays on a yacht.

You shouldn't have pictures of any guests on your camera.

- Okay. Understood.

I--I see what you're saying. I apologize.

When a new crew member makes a rookie mistake,

it's hard to discipline them

based on something they didn't even know they were doing wrong.

You've come clean with me about what's happened,

and I appreciate that.

But I am gonna take your phone

when we've got charter guests on board.

So tomorrow morning, before the charter guests arrive,

I expect you to come up to me and hand me that phone.

And as soon as they step off, I'll hand it back to you.

- If you feel like you need to take it,

then I understand. - I do feel that way.

I don't trust you enough that you'll do the right thing

to keep your phone out of public view.

- It's like I can't win, but I'm not gonna give up.

They're not gonna drive me so insane

that I'm gonna get off this yacht.

No, I'm staying here.

Understood.

[upbeat music]

- Hannah, Ben, and Bryan,

could you guys all come to the bridge?

- Good evening, Captain. - Hey, Captain.

- Good evening, guys. - Linda.

I love it when the primary charter guest is a chick.

- They're all chicks.

- Oh! - Oh, wow.

- Primary charter guest is Linda P. Jones.

She is the CEO of a company called "Be Wealthy & Smart."

She shows people how to build wealth by investing

in economic cycles and creating luxury brand businesses.

- Holy smokes. They're intelligent.

- She's bringing on board a group of her closest friends

for a girls' retreat.

There is going to be an early evening beach dinner

with bonfire at sunset and s'mores.

- I love cooking outside,

out of my little sweaty enclosure.

I'm actually looking forward to it.

All right, Sounds good.

- What is a "smur"?

- S'more. - I've never heard of it.

- They're crazy. Yeah. - "Smur."

A "sch'more." S'more.

Ah, it's gonna be like "burgular."

I can't pronounce that word either.

- It's graham cracker, marshmallow, and chocolate.

- They're a well-known thing in the States.

Day two, Hannah's gonna arrange to bring a jeweler on board,

and we're gonna finish that up with a formal dinner.

- Okay, Captain, thank you. - All right.

- Thanks, Captain. See you in the morning.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[knocks on door] - Jules?

Can we just have a crew mess chat real quick?

- A crew mess chat? - Yeah, you and me.

- Yeah, yeah. - Maybe even clean up

a little bit. - This time at night, though?

Really?

Bryan feels like he can go around

and boss every single person around.

- No, no, it needs to look good.

- He's got to remember that there's a divide

between the exterior and the interior.

If anyone, it's Hannah who's gonna tell me to do a job.

- Just do it right. - Yeah, I'm doing it right.

- Well, I know, but I don't want you

to have too much resistance.

- Are you drunk? - Jules.

- Yes? - Whatever, you know.

I'm being a nice guy.

If the crew mess doesn't get cleaned,

then I'm the one who's gonna get in trouble for it

because the captain has asked me, the first mate,

to make sure this gets done.

We need to sweep this up. - Okay. Do you want to?

- No. You're gonna do it.

- Oh, I'm doing it? - Yeah, yeah.

- Oh, okay. - Yeah, yeah.

Ultimately, this is the interior.

This is what Hannah should be telling Jules.

I'm doing Hannah's job almost.

♪ ♪

- Are you just gonna stand and supervise and watch, or...

- No, no, no, just relax, okay?

I don't really appreciate the passive-aggressiveness.

- Hey, hey, hey, mister.

You are going way too fáááing far.

- Hey, relax, okay? I'm telling her what's going on.

- Okay, well, you don't tell her what's going on.

- It's okay; it's okay. - If you have a problem

with her, you come to me.

You don't speak to her like that.

- I'm not speaking rude.

I'm just being assertive in what we need to do.

- Well, I'm doing it. We're all doing it.

- Well, you know what, buddy? - You're doing good.

You're doing fine. - No, it's fáááing 12:15.

We're having a chill night. - I'm just letting you know.

- Don't... - You need to chill, okay?

You need to get out of my face right now, seriously.

- I'm not in your face. - You need to back off.

- You just don't talk to her like that.

- It's cool; it's cool; okay, it's cool.

- Okay, so just walk off. - I don't want to hear it.

- All right, let's just-- I just want

to make sure it gets done.

- We're doing it; walk off. - It's going.

Is it not happening? - We're doing it.

So will you go? - Okay, relax, chill, chill.

Chills. - You know what?

I think it would be a really good idea

if you just walked away for a few minutes, if you don't mind.

Or we can walk away. What do you want?

- No, that's fine. I'll walk away.

- Okay? - All right.

We just need to make sure these things get done.

- Okay, honey, you know what? We're gonna come back

in five minutes and complete the duties,

but for now, let's just go upstairs.

- How long you girls been yachting?

- Oh, fááá off, Bryan.

This is the first time he's getting aggressive with me,

and it's good; it's opened my eyes.

- This is bullsháá.

- Bryan, you're just over the top.

- How disrespectful is this?

- We don't want to be near you right now.

You're being aggressive, so no.

- No, I'm not being aggressive. I'm being chill.

I'm trying to just say... - You're not--okay, great.

So give us fáááing five minutes then, all right?

What the fááá is wrong with you?

No, don't follow. - I'm not; I'm going right here.

- If you're going right there, go right there, hey.

I know it's, like, sexist, but for a man

to have that much aggression towards a woman,

it's just unacceptable.

- Captain has specifically asked me

to look after the crew mess.

What am I supposed to do?

Leave it up to Hannah to look after her?

For her to do a sháááy job?

- Are you kidding? When everyone's been using

the crew mess at 12:00 at night when I've been

in the laundry room doing his washing.

- The last thing you need is a stewardess war against you.

I'm the chef. I'm an expert at that, okay?

They're relentless, mate.

- Is this the most unprofessional display

of being a yachtie or what?

I don't want to be the enforcer,

but sometimes I have to; I will be a dick.

I'm not sorry for that.

- I think when he has a couple of drinks,

he just goes a little bit loopy.

- So, I'm not being crazy for, like, going--

- No, he was being aggressive.

- If you turn into a fun drunk, good.

Have your drinks. If you get angry,

then just stay away from alcohol.

- He's a bit scary aggressive.

- Like, I'm scared he's going to come up behind me.

[electronic music]

[alarm buzzing]

♪ ♪

- We're telling him just, "We'll do the crew mess.

Just move out of the way."

- And I went, "Bryan, leave us the fááá alone.

You're being aggressive." Went into the dining room.

He follows us in there.

I was like, "Are you fáááing serious?"

- I don't mind him looming;

it's just the way he was doing it.

[groans]

- Mmm.

- Are you okay? What's going on?

And, uh--and I'm shivering.

- He's faking it.

Dude, we got work to do.

[electronic beeping]

- I'm getting a 99.8. It's getting up there.

- Come on, dude. It's not that bad.

Don't... [groans]

Just man up.

- I'm Bobby.

We got the Golden Girls on board.

- When you toast, you're supposed to look

right into the person's eye.

'Cause otherwise it's seven years of bad sex.

- Are we gonna have sex now? [laughter]

- Bobby is one of those, like, men that you could just,

like, sit with a cup of tea and just observe

till you're, like, 100.

- Danny's staying in bed. He's got a fever right now.

- Bullsháá.

[knocks]

All right, Daniel-san, talk to me.

- Are you okay, man? You can barely talk.

What are you feeling, bro?

- Take your temperature one more time.

This is the charter where Daniel could really step up

and be someone that he wants to be

and that I think he can be.

- If you're sick, you're sick.

There's not that much you can do.

All right.

Why'd you got to get Daniel sick?

- Someone had to.

Just so I could get out on deck.

- Yeah, we definitely might need your help.

- [chuckles] - I see.

- Sneaky, sneaky.

- Where's the sugar? Sugar, sugar?

Do we have sugar, babe? - I don't know, Ben.

- Sugar?

- Ben and I have gotten to the stage, I guess,

where, you know, we need to make an effort

just to be coworkers, and that's kinda sad,

especially from where we come from,

but I don't know.

I don't think there's much more I can do on my part.

- Oh, pretty flowers. - [coughs]

Where is Daniel? - Being gloomy in bed.

- He's in bed, eh? - Yeah.

- I always knew that I shouldn't mess with Hannah too badly,

and I think Danny may have overstepped that line.

Ooh.

I think Hannah brought out the voodoo on him.

How long is he gonna be in bed for?

- Who cares? I need to get to work.

Let's do this.

- You want to hit these overheads

or save that for later?

- Uh, let's hit 'em now.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- We've got six women coming on today,

and tomorrow they want a jeweler to come on

and bring a selection of his collection, and...

[chuckles]

Sorry.

If you could arrange the best jeweler on the island,

you know, it'd be great.

- Captain? - Hey.

- Daniel is feeling sick

and is still in his cabin.

He says he's got a fever.

- How does he determine he's got a fever?

- His thermometer. - That's not a very good thing.

If he is sick, I don't want him to give it to everybody else.

- Right. - Okay, thank you.

[upbeat music]

- Yummy.

- Julia, Julia, Bryan.

Could you meet me on the bridge aft deck, please?

♪ ♪

- Hey, Bryan. So what's up?

- Yeah, well, look, I just want to hash out last night.

- Yeah. - It was just, you know--

it just wasn't the right time to even, probably,

mention that and bring that up.

- The thing is, though, I've noticed it's when you have

a couple of drinks, Bryan, and become a little bit aggressive.

You don't stand over a girl. - Yeah, of course, of course.

- You know, or, you know, for me, it's not gentlemanly.

- Absolutely. And you know what? - Yeah.

- I consider myself a gentleman. - Yeah.

- At least I try to be, you know, and I'm not perfect.

The last thing I want to do is damage the relationship

I have with Jules and be mean to her.

That's not my goal.

- For me, I just--I don't want to be confronted by you

in that way again, to be quite honest.

- I understand.

- I've never had anyone stand over me

to tell me to sweep the floor.

Not even my dad or my mom would do that to me.

Bryan would get more out of people

if he just had a bit more compassion.

- Thanks, Jules. - Jolly son, you're welcome.

- You too.

- All crew, all crew, guests will be arriving in 20 minutes.

Make sure you're in your whites.

♪ ♪

- [groaning]

- Okay, everyone, they're walking down the dock.

- All right, game time. - Oh, my gosh.

- Got my deck crew here. All good.

- Wow. Unbelievable.

- They've all got dresses on.

Like, proper, like, evening dresses.

- Yay. - There you are.

- Hi. I'm Karen. - We're excited to have you.

- I'm Bobby.

- Hi, Kathy. I'm stoked.

We got the Golden Girls on board.

- Welcome aboard, everybody.

We're gonna get right out of here.

We've got a beautiful beach selected

for this afternoon and this evening.

I think we're gonna have a great day.

- We are so excited to be on this journey with you.

- We're excited to have you here as well.

- You can bring your champagne and follow me.

- Fantastic. - Thank you.

- How was your flight? - It was great.

- Okay, so this is your sundeck. - This is amazing.

It's beautiful. - Do you guys Jet Ski?

- Are you game, ladies? - Yes.

[laughter]

- This is the master cabin. - Wow.

- Awesome.

Look at the lapis lazuli counters.

- This floor. This is all onyx, wow.

- What a fabulous yacht.

♪ ♪

[horn blaring]

[engine revving]

- Stern first. And we gotta go quick.

We got a ferry coming in. - Copy that.

Okay, bow, please.

[tense music]

♪ ♪

[horn blaring]

- I have to question Jen because she says

that she's been working on all these boats,

but she can't perform at the level that she says she is.

She's molasses.

- Hey, all line free, Captain, all line free.

- Good job.

- Just relax and enjoy it. If you need anything,

just let me know, okay? - Okay, great. Thank you.

- Cheers, ladies. all: Cheers.

♪ ♪

- Oh, please. Thank you. - Hi.

I just wanted to have a quick chat with you about the lunch.

- I could use a snack.

- Mini--little mini-sandwiches, like, you know.

- Yeah. - Like little tea sandwiches.

- Little tea sandwiches, yeah.

- Unless these ladies happen to unpack their suitcase

and have, like, a whole heap of bondage and S and M stuff,

we're gonna be able to chill, breathe,

and hopefully get some sleep.

- Want to do tequila shots? - I could do tequila shots.

[laughter]

- I like margaritas.

- Sounds good. - Thank you.

- I have never had a hangover with tequila.

- Really? - That I can remember.

- Ugh.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Hello, hello. A margarita.

- That's me. Yay. When you toast--

- You're supposed to look in the eye before you drink

'cause otherwise it's... - Seven years of bad sex.

[laughter]

- That's what they say! - Are we gonna have sex now?

[all laugh]

♪ ♪

- All right, this is ready. - Thank you.

- Look at that. Oh, my gosh.

- Bobby, Bobby, get ready to drop port.

- Copy that. Standing by on port.

- Okay, let's go with four shots on port.

- Ah, you got this. Yeah, four shots coming up.

- Look at the beach. Oh, my God.

[indistinct chatter]

[upbeat music]

- Fááá. [chuckles]

Fááá.

- Okay, you go and get napkins...

- Okay, napkins. - Cutlery.

We'll go for the wine and water glasses after.

♪ ♪

- To all tenders on the stern,

I'll just tell 'em that you're ready to go.

- Jen, Jen, Bryan.

- Go for Jen.

- Hey, Jen, can you meet me in the main salon?

- Yeah, I'm actually on the Jet Ski.

The rope fell into the water, so I have to bring this back.

- I feel like there's something going on

between Jen and her brain.

All right, get it done quick.

♪ ♪

- You've had proper s'mores before, right?

Oh, gosh. Really?

- It's like strawberry-flavored marshmallow peeps.

This is gonna be disgusting.

- Oh, God.

- ♪ Hey ♪

[upbeat music]

♪ Hey ♪

♪ ♪

- Jen, Jen, Bobby and I are about to depart,

so I want you to come here and play lifeguard

'cause they want to go swimming.

- Copy.

I don't think Bryan's evil because I've seen

good parts shine through,

but I just think that this position's getting to his head,

and I definitely think he's sexist.

- We'd like to go out on the Ski-Doo--

or the--the WaveRunners. - The WaveRunners.

- Yeah.

- Boom. Perfect landing. - Okay, you ready?

- There we go. - Yes.

- You want to come in. Just don't give it gas.

- Oh. Ahh!

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Damn, these moms can ride. - [laughs]

♪ ♪

- Okay, Tiff, let's get ready for this beach picnic.

Wine glasses, water glasses, salt, and pepper.

And all the drinks in this one. - That one.

- That one? - [exhales deeply]

- We've got lemons and limes in there?

- Yep. - Cutlery?

- Mm-hmm. - Serving towels?

- Mm-hmm. - Sweet.

- All right, so can we--can we do this then, guys, please?

Do you have room?

- Yeah, we got to take all that s'moresy stuff.

- Oh, what are these marshmallows?

These are not the right marshmallows for this.

- It's a Greek twist on s'mores.

- Fire pit in this area? - Yeah, that's perfect.

- Honestly, we noticed that we're down a person

because we're getting a lot more done.

[chuckles]

Danny is not in the way.

It was better that he wasn't there.

- Oh, man, I feel like sháá.

- Couple more good pieces, we're money.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Hello, love. - Hello, honey bunny.

- Babe, what type of drink would you like on the beach?

- Sex on the beach, baby. - Ooh!

- [laughs]

- Well, we can get in our shorts and red polos.

- I need to go to the beach.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- What's up, bro? - My friend.

Ready to rock? - Yeah, boss.

It's very unusual for me to be enjoying the Mediterranean.

Usually it's viewed through my galley porthole,

which isn't quite the same,

so I'm just trying to soak it in.

That's awesome, man. That's perfect.

[laughter]

- Thank you. - Whoo!

[energetic music]

- Okay. Thank you.

- Can I light them all? Because I love fire.

- Are you a little pyromaniac? - Yeah.

- You know, behind every fireman's a little pyro.

- Oh, gosh. [laughs]

I'm really happy that me and Bobby seem to, like--

we're getting on, and we're kind of in that friend zone,

and kind of, the awkwardness is gone.

- Oh, my gosh. - Yeah.

Oh, yeah. - This is amazing; look at it.

Take your pants off. [laughter]

- You just bring your body this way,

and I'll take your legs this way.

- Like, like-- - Like, lay back.

- No, no. - Lay back. Turn around.

- He's gonna carry you, like, over the threshold.

- I believe in chivalry.

It gives them a sense of royalty feeling, you know.

I don't want your feet to touch the water.

I don't want you to get wet. There we go.

My mama raised me right.

- Service with a smile. - Thank you.

I know. Did you see that great catch?

- He's getting a workout, let me tell you.

- Yep. [laughter]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- I love it. - I know. It's amazing.

- Served with gnocchi and Naxian cheese,

chopped Greek salad, and barbecue shrimp.

- Here we go.

- Oh, yeah. - Oh, look at that.

- Oh, my gosh. - Wow.

- Mmm. both: Wow.

- Died and gone to heaven.

[upbeat music]

- All right, ladies. - Oh, thank you so much.

I thought we were gonna sit on the sand.

[laughs]

- Oh, my God. - Need a hand?

- Well, you know what? If it gets really close,

we won't have to shave our legs for a few days.

[laughter]

♪ ♪

- Is it working? - Slowly.

- Oh.

- You've had proper s'mores before, right?

- Yeah. You get it right,

it's a dream, isn't it? - Yeah.

- Oh, gosh. Really? - [laughs]

- Bobby, can you do something instead of laughing at me?

Get the tongs. Just push it down a little bit.

Oh, God.

- It's like strawberry-flavored marshmallow peeps.

This is gonna be disgusting.

Lots of napkins.

- And maybe some, like, turpentine as well.

[laughter]

I'm deeply unhappy with that, so it can go.

- Okay. - Mm.

- This is Greece's answer to the American s'more.

[laughter] all: Thank you.

- Wow. - Oh, wow.

- Mmm. - Thank you.

- You outdid yourself. - Oh, well, thank you.

Thank you very much. - They're incredible.

[knock at door]

- Danny? - Yeah?

- When was the last time you took your temperature?

- And?

- 103.2. It's getting higher.

- The last time Bryan checked, you were 101.

- Yeah.

- Okay, well I'm gonna go see if I can find something for you.

Anytime that somebody's this sick on a boat,

it is of great concern to me and to the rest of the crew,

and who knows if it's contagious or something too?

It could take the whole crew down.

- Thanks, Cap. I'm sorry about all this.

- Well, it's not your fault.

♪ ♪

Hey, well, welcome back. - Thank you.

- You ready? - Yeah.

- Thank you. - Are you guys dancing

the cha-cha-cha?

♪ ♪

- Are you off to bed? - Yes.

- Yes, you're off?

I've died and gone to heaven. It's so nice.

They are so sweet. I want to keep them all season.

Sleep well. Good night. - Okay, good night.

♪ ♪

- Tag 'em and bag 'em, Captain.

- [laughing]

- You're about to be excited. - [humming]

- Did you find my glasses?

You look like a baller. - We got them.

- Thank you, woman. - You liked it.

- What am I gonna do about her, Jen?

You see that she flirts.

Give me some chick advice.

- In two weeks, she'll be so far from you,

and you probably won't see her again.

- She said she wanted to go to a music festival.

- She'd probably bring her boyfriend.

- Whatevs.

- Don't get me wrong; Julia crosses the line sometimes

being very flirtatious and cute, but there's nothing sexual

between Julia and Bobby.

He's not her type, even if she were single.

- We're Facebook friends,

so I'm just gonna keep hoping that they break up on it.

[both laughing]

Then I'm gonna be like, "Move to America,

land of the free and home of the brave."

- [laughs]

- Are you tending to Daniel? - Trying.

- Is he okay? - He just took his temperature.

103.2. - What?

He needs to get--yeah, he should be--have a cold compress.

- How are you, Tiff? - Good.

- The guests have gone to bed, Tiff, so you're off, darling.

- I am so happy.

- We've never had guests that go to bed before 12:00.

- No. - This is the first time

of the season. - I'm loving it.

- Oh, me too.

- Daniel? - Hey, mate.

- All right, listen, we're going to need

to bring your fever down a little bit.

- This is a Panadol, which is like a Tylenol.

- Okay. - Drink that.

- Ugh. - Put this on your forehead.

- All right, bro. - Yeah, we need to bring

that down a little bit.

That's quite dangerous, actually.

Daniel is really, really ill right now.

- I really appreciate you coming in, bro.

- Sorry I couldn't come in earlier.

I was just at the beach.

I get that no one really likes him on the boat,

but this is actually quite a serious situation.

Come knock or whatever. - All right.

Cool. Thanks, bro. - All right, mate, take care.

[tense music]

♪ ♪

- Hmm?

Um, it's nice.

- Little Danny's off in bed.

- Yeah, what do you think? - [scoffs]

To be honest, it's been a nice day.

Poor Danny. I know it sounds awful,

but sometimes karma's a bitch.

- Hello, Bobby.

- Hey, Bobby, come to the bow for a cigarette with me.

- How we doing? - Good, how are you?

- Good.

- I'll come up in a bit.

Good night, Captain.

- You're off, darling. I'll finish this.

- Thank you.

- What up, man? - Lights going on.

- Ugh, man, I feel like sháá. - Ugh, get away from me.

I gotta sleep in this? Kidding me?

If I get sick, I'm gonna work,

and I don't want to work being sick.

- Don't get sick, bro. Wash your hand.

[sultry music]

♪ ♪

- Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm.

♪ ♪

Bobby is one of those, like, men that you could just, like,

sit with a cup of tea and just observe

till you're, like, 100.

It's nice; he's nice; it's nice.

Can I use "nice" again? [laughing]

Um, it's nice. [giggles]

Good night, darling.

[funky bass music]

♪ ♪

- Bobby, Bobby, please report back to me

once you've checked on Danny.

- On my way now.

Temperature time. - [moans]

- Under the tongue.

♪ ♪

- We're gonna do breakfast in the dining room table area.

- Mm-hmm, yeah. - [laughs]

- Don't send any dogs through.

We might start chewing on their legs.

♪ ♪

- 102.9.

- Just got a really bad stomachache, man.

- Ugh. Maybe you need to just sháá your pants.

- Mm-hmm.

- All right, Cap, Daniel's at 102.9.

He says his stomach hurts. - Copy that.

- Jen, Jen, Bryan, meet me on the bow.

- Copy that.

- All right, Jen, this would be a good time

to practice your knots.

Jen can't tie the knots that are required

to do the basic jobs of the deckhand position.

Watch your fingers. Sháá, sháá, sháá, sháá,

sháá, sháá.

I'm losing it. It's like a plumber coming in

and not knowing how to use a plunger.

How do you tie a bowline? You do this.

- Yeah. So what's wrong with that one?

- I find the fastest way is, again, to go like this, right?

- Bryan's definitely a control freak.

He wants me to do the bowline exactly how he wants it,

but there are multiple ways.

Unless you're the president of the United States,

I hate being bossed around.

- And then this hand folds this line back up.

Do--I want you to do that ten times just now.

- You're so pretty. - No.

I feel bad that me and Hannah kissed

because my feelings are stronger for Julia,

and I don't want Hannah to think that I'm leading her on.

- Ready for a good day? - Yeah.

Are we cool from last night? - Oh, yeah, of course.

- Yeah?

- [groans]

- Oh, Bobby.

- I tell Julia because I don't want her

to find out from anybody else.

I still don't know what's going on between me and Julia,

but if something were to come of us,

I don't want her to think I'm a liar.

- Bobby. [laughing]

You weirdo.

- Is he trying to make me jealous?

Or are we really in that friend zone

where we can tell each other everything,

which is good for me, but, yeah, bizarre?

[upbeat music]

- Asparagus and red pepper omelet.

- We're starting on this end first.

[laughter]

- That is really yummy.

- Good morning, girls. all: Good morning.

- Can I get you coffee, some tea, or anything?

- Coffee.

- These ladies are super polite.

They're super lovely.

- Yeah, the presentation is just amazing.

- I love that he did egg white omelets, so healthy.

- I don't know about you,

but the duvet cover on my bed was so soft.

- I love the way the towels smelled.

- Yeah. - Sometimes when you have

guests like that, you almost want to give them

a little bit more, um,

just because you know that they're really appreciating it.

- Would you care for another omelet?

- Well, if you change your mind, I'm right next door.

- Okay. [laughter]

- Welcome outside. - Oh, my God, it's amazing.

- You think you could step up here and be boatswain?

- Fááá, yeah. - Tie a bowline right now.

- Tie me a bowline. - Oh, man.

- Tie a bowline and a clove hitch.

- Clove hitch? - Come on, boatswain.

- ♪ Do-do-do-do-do ♪

- Help? - No.

- Sorry, Tiff. - So close.

- Yeah, Jen is not trained in the knots as well.

- Yes, I am.

- Bryan just won't lay off of Jen.

I've worked on deck before, and, like, yeah,

you should know how to tie a bowline,

but, like, there are so many other things you need to know

about being on deck; it's not just one knot.

Yeah, I know knots. I already know names too.

- Here you go. - There it is.

- All crew, this is Mark. Can one of you guys

double-check on Danny's well-being, please?

- I got it, Captain.

- Thank you.

- Okay, let's hope...

[electronic beeping]

Fááá, it's 102.7.

[exhales sharply]

- [laughs] It does suck.

I have a younger brother,

but he didn't actually need to be taken care of

as much as Daniel.

How's your head? - Head's fine.

Main thing is, I have, like, the sharpest

stomach pains, man. - All right, hang in there.

I know you're busy right now, but I just checked on Danny,

and his fever's up to 102 again.

I don't know what you want to do

and if he needs to go get help.

- [groans]

- His fever's up to 102 again.

I don't know what you want to do

and if he needs to go get help.

All right. - Okay, thanks.

We have a medical issue on board.

It's a completely different situation than if you're ashore.

We can't just drive, but if he's not unstable

and his temperature is not steadily declining,

we need to get him off the boat.

- Oh, fááá.

- You're gonna have to bring it down.

- Oh, sháá. - Wow, you are hot.

If you have a very high fever, it can affect your vital organs,

including your brain, okay?

Let's get some air-conditioning on.

I told the captain as well.

- [coughs]

- I just wanted to let you know the water temperature's 80.

- Oh, that sounds wonderful. - Good.

- Am I driving? - You're driving.

- All right. - You two are going together?

- Yeah. - Ha-ha.

- Double trouble, baby. [laughter]

- All right, go ahead and start her up.

[engine revving]

All right, you're ready. - Whoo!

[upbeat music] - Whoo!

♪ ♪

- Oh, geez.

- I'm really surprised on how adventurous the ladies are.

All of a sudden, here they come.

Vroom.

Shredding grannies ripping through.

- Oh, sháá. Quit running into us.

- Take another reading and see where you are.

[exhales sharply] Fááá.

- [chuckling]

- I cannot take a sick day

because no one can cook.

Right now, I actually think Daniel has a legitimate illness.

Captain, Danny's temperature's at 103.6.

- Bryan, Bobby, and Hannah, could you meet me

in the crew mess ASAP, please?

- Okay, copy that. - Yeah, copy that.

- [moaning]

- Danny's back up at 103 or so.

- Oh, sháá.

- This kid needs to see a doctor ASAP.

We've got to get him off the boat.

- Okay. - I'm gonna medevac.

- Oh, sháá.

- Next on "Below Deck Med"...

- Here we go again.

All guests are used to partying hard

that they'll need a vacation from this vacation.

- I'm super sexy. [laughter]

- Tequila, four. - Yeah!

- This is like a fáááing frat house right now.

- Oh, my God! - Ooh, you okay?

- I want to get in my bikini. [groans]

- Who's not up? - Them two are not up.

- What do you mean them two? Those two, okay, cool.

- Those two.

It's Ben's manner and his tone--

very condescending and very dismissive.

- How does Tiff work when somebody's not here?

- I mean, if you're not here and you're not working,

you probably shouldn't get tipped.

- You just don't like the way my knots are.

- There's no such thing as a Jen knot.

This is a safety thing.

- I'm not the best deckhand you've had,

and you're not the best first mate I've had.

- Are you bringing dessert?

- I'm gonna bring the main first.

- Smile. - I'm smiling.

It's like they've been brought up in a farmyard.

- The more we complain about the service,

the faster we'll get stuff.

- For more "Below Deck Med," visit bravotv.com