Original subtitles

We look awful. Except mum... She always looks good.

Happy birthday to you,

happy birthday to you,

happy birthday dear mother,

happy birthday to you.

One there! One there!

Well, mum,

when are you going to lie about your age like I do?

It was hard enough getting so far without taking away years now.

That's right. You look great.

Because I'm happy. It's love...

Found a boyfriend?

Well, not exactly that.

I'm in love.

-Really? -You don't say!

Wait a minute. There's something else.

This person is younger than me.

Much younger?

And also...

Now you'll see.

-I bet he's good-looking. -Let's see.

Girls...

this is Eliska.

But, it's a...

Yes.

That's what I had to tell you.

Eliska, these are my daughters.

Jimena, Elvira and Sol,

like the women in ''El Cid''. It was my ex's idea.

He's an intellectual.

Come and give her a kiss, girls.

Hello.

My prisent.

Thank you.

''Present''. Eliska's Czech.

Schubert's ''Fantasy.''

What a lovely edition!

Do you dare?

Eliska's a wonderful pianist.

This is one of our favourite pieces.

Why don't you sit down?

Let's start with the 2nd movement.

MY MOTHER LIKES WOMEN

Right girls, look this way.

That's right. Fine.

Elvira,

a smile for daddy. Ready?

That's it, fine.

Now don't move.

I've nothing against gays and lesbians,

but at her age...

She should sort herself out.

She is our mother!

-And with a grandchild. -Look,

she's been lonely.

Let her do what she feels like doing.

You can't always do what you want.

She's selfish. Only thinks of herself.

Sure. But why does it

bother you so much?

That's how I am. I don't ignore things like you do.

What about you? Do you mind?

My heart's pounding. I think I'm going to have a fit.

Don't get hysterical.

No-one died of having a lesbian mother.

Sol! Don't say it like that! This is strong stuff!

Yes, very strong stuff.

And she's the same age as us.

She's seems very dull.

Even if she was perfect,

it's incredible that mum should suddenly prefer women.

It seems completely normal to me.

Nowadays everyone's bisexual. Take dogs, for example.

We know you think anything goes in bed. But not mum!

Mum always liked men.

This foreign girl must have got round her.

I can just see it...

One day, at the piano, her fingers wandered... like this.

Why do these things always happen to me?

And my relationship with mum's so complex...

-Don't get hysterical. -Yes.

Okay.

This is a terrible shock,

but we're adults and we can handle it.

Mum is mum,

we are us,

I am me,

and from now our aim must be

to accept it.

Accept it...

Accept it.

My mother's a lesbian... My mother's a lesbian...

I haven't slept a wink all night

trying to accept it. It makes me feel sick.

What are you so afraid of?

That I may be like her.

I do badly with men, don't I? Not that I'm too demanding,

but perhaps men aren't really my thing.

-Perhaps I like women too. -Well,

we've seen your sexuality's symbiotic link with her.

A dominant, overprotective woman...

Then I'm a lesbian!

By no means.

Basically you like...

real men.

But they scare you.

Everything scares you. You don't believe in yourself.

Look at this fish.

Which one?

This one.

It's a cycloid jewel. Look,

they all move out of the way.

Self-confidence commands respect.

I don't live in a tank.

My life's worse than that.

I've no money, no time for writing,

no self-esteem, no sexual identity. I'd change places with your fish.

One thing at a time, Elvira.

You don't like your life, so why not change it?

Think...

what can you do?

Have a boobs job and make them smaller? Then I might have more self-con

That's not the point...

You want to write, right?

You hate it where you work.

Then why not leave?

I need to earn a living.

Go to your mother.

Hasn't she got money?

Ernesto,

I've tried to be independent for years.

You want my mother to maintain me?

Make no mistakes, Elvira.

It'd be an act of personal

assertion. Like saying,

''Give me wings. I wish to create.''

And the money

would only be an advance.

Once successful,

you'd return it.

And if I'm not successful?

We'll deal with that in the next session. Time's up.

Thank you.

THE ERASED YEARS

Hello.

You look bad.

-What's up? -Can you see it?

Bags under my eyes, right?

Not that bad...

It's not surprising.

I haven't slept a wink.

My mum says she's a lesbian,

and it was a shock...

The boss is waiting.

We have to go.

I wanted to give you something.

Not now. We have a business lunch.

It was important.

I've a surprise for you.

Guess who we're meeting?

-The ''Hilarión'' prize-winner. -Miguel Bouzas?

He may want us to publish his work.

So try and be nice to him.

Do those things girls do to show interest.

If he signs, we'll be out of a fix.

We've been about to get out of a fix for the last 4 years.

Things are worse than ever.

This month I can only pay you half your salaries.

What?

Either that or we close down. Really.

I understand you getting pissed off but that's how it is.

You know how much I appreciate you.

So please see this through.

Come on.

By the way...

At the restaurant ask for something cheap.

The budget's limited.

First course, elvers.

Second course, elvers

as well.

I'm on an elver-based diet, alternating with seafood.

-Want to try it? -No, thanks.

I'll have entrecote.

But you can copy it out for me.

There's

a decent Rioja here...

House wine? No. Viña Ardanza Gran Reserva? A bottle of that.

Look, you don't need

to ask for anything special.

Take advantage of the occasion.

Elvira's always showing me up.

Well, Miguel,

I've read your stories

and they're simply fantastic.

Thank you.

But I wrote them a long time ago.

I'd like to look through them.

I think they're fine.

He'd say anything to make you sign up.

And you, Elvira.

What did you think of them?

I haven't read them.

My fault.

I forgot

to give her them.

But she's a great admirer of yours, aren't you?

You can speak your mind.

I won't burst into tears.

I'd like to, but I haven't read even one of your novels.

That doesn't matter.

They aren't required reading.

Don't be modest.

It's not surprising

you should feel humiliated.

Success swells the ego, doesn't it?

Stop nudging me, Bernardo.

Why are you being like this

with me?

Got something against me?

I am a bit messed up.

But it's not...

It's...

My mother's a lesbian, and then

he says I'm on half-pay

and my psychiatrist...

I mean my psychologist...

Why am I telling you this?

I haven't slept and I took

a pill... Excuse me,

I'm going to the toilet.

She's not always like this.

It's pouring. Can we drop you off somewhere?

No. I live nearby. I can walk.

I'm glad you're publishing with us.

-See you next week. -Fine.

Let's go.

Look, I'll walk too.

Miguel!

I wanted to tell you...

something.

I've read all you've written.

The book of poems,

your first work too.

I liked it very much.

Did you?

Elvira.

What a surprise!

Coming in?

Yes.

Your mother's practising.

Perhaps I should come back...

No, come, please.

I cook something you'll like.

I cook Badds.

-Pardon? -Badds.

A dish of my country... With potato and bumpkin...

No, pumpkin...

-Courgette. -Courgette.

So...

try it...

Try it.

Good, right?

Then I put a little in tub and

-you take away. -No, no, really.

-Don't bother. -Put it in.

When my girl says no, she means yes but won't say so.

-Hello, dear. -Hello.

-Very good practising, Sofía. -No,

not really.

Listen later and tell me.

I'm planning a concert.

That's... That's nice...

I must go to bank before close but

you forget signing.

She's decided

to organise me.

Sadly she may even succeed.

-Off you go. -Tea is made.

And don't put sugar.

-When I away, you watch? -Come on,

out you go, little tyrant.

Let's have it in the lounge.

Christ, you can't find anything here!

-Is Sol here? -Rummaging as usual.

Elvira,

I want to talk to you about...

all that's been happening just lately.

With Eliska and me.

You must be surprised.

-No, no, no... -Yes, yes, yes.

I'm the most surprised of all.

I never imagined anything like this.

But it happened in the most

natural way. She was on her own,

we became friends,

she stayed over and one night...

Don't tell me the details...

Do you feel uncomfortable?

No. I feel bad, but it's not your fault.

-What's the matter? -Mum!

Can you help me?

I can...

Hello, Sol.

I can't find the platform boots.

I need them for tonight. Know where they are?

I've no idea, dear.

This is Eliska's study now. Maybe she tidied up.

I don't like my things being moved.

Well why don't you take them home?

And tidy this up. Okay?

Oh dear! Sometimes Sol's like a little girl.

I'm sorry, dear. What did you want to tell me?

I wanted to ask you something but I don't know how.

But I have to do it for my self-confidence. So,

I'm going to ask you,

without doubts, without hesitation,

without...

I'm going to be a jewel fish.

A jewel fish?

Okay,

go ahead.

Now?

Yes.

I need to borrow some money.

So I can leave work and start writing.

Three...

two million pesetas?

My darling, I'd lend you 3, 2 or 1 7 million

so that you could

start writing, but I just haven't got it.

No?

No.

I had some savings but Eliska needed them so I gave them to her.

Eliska?

Yes. You see,

some grants have to be repaid,

or you go back home, thus

avoiding the brain drain.

And you sold granddad's pine grove?

Yes, but I also need

that money.

The courses were expensive.

Look, mum...

I'm sorry, Elvira.

No, no...

This is important. Think, where are those boots?

How should I know?

Perhaps Eliska threw them out. They were old.

Anyway,

I have to go.

-Elvira? -Yes?

Don't forget the cake

Eliska made.

She made it with love.

TO MY DAUGHTERS, WHO DRAGGED ME OUT

OF THE MlDDLE AGES AND MADE ME FACE THE FUTURE.

Right, dear.

We can go. My glasses?

Hey, dad...

You know Sol's concert? Well,

-mum's going... -I thought so.

We parents make sacrifices for our children.

Sure.

But she may not be going alone.

She may be going

with somebody. A...

woman... A girl named Eliska.

Yes, her girlfriend.

You know?

We met the other day.

We dined at an Italian...

Very good, by the way.

And didn't it...

...nothing.

I don't know really.

What do you mean?

Aren't you shocked? Doesn't it bother you...

or surprise you that mum...

likes... women?

Well... Surprise me...?

Lesbianism

is a well-documented practice.

Haven't you read Sappho?

Bad translations, mind you.

Sappho's love is not so much

love for women

as love for beauty as represented by women.

Here it is.

''Ilove abrosyna,''

''Abrosyna''.

How to translate that?

-Delicateness? Splendour? -Grace...

Luxury...

What verses. You've read them, haven't you?

Remember that other?

''Thy curls with crowns encircle,

and crowns of anise with thy hands...''

Thank you.

Well,

now I'd like to sing a new song.

This is the first time before an audience and I'd like

to dedicate it to my family.

Especially my mum,

the coolest woman in the world. Let's hear it.

I'd like to introduce you to mum's girlfriend,

I felt like committing suicide

when she told me she had a woman

licking her belly,

licking her belly...

My mum,

she likes women.

My mum, she likes

women.

My mum, she likes women.

We all went dancing

with mum's girlfriend.

I didn't know how to take it when she told me

that women are the essence

of pleasure,

the essence of pleasure.

20 years younger and she doesn't

speak Spanish... She's got a woman...

licking her belly...

My mum, she likes women.

My mum, she likes women.

My mum, she likes women.

All human beings

do what they can...

My mum, she likes women...

Raúl.

Don't go. My family won't like it...

And I don't like this circus.

-What do you mean? -Look,

it's bad enough my mother-in-law

turning into a lesbian,

but shouting it from the rooftops...

All I need is the people at the office to find out.

But you're always saying they're jerks.

Honestly, Jimena, there are times...

Come on, Benja, we're leaving.

Have a good time playing the modern woman.

Mummy...

My mum, she likes women,

my mum, she likes women,

my mum, she likes women...

Give me a drag?

Why didn't you like it?

No reason...

I love you telling hundreds of people about my sexual habits.

And in such a funny way.

Did it upset her?

Is she a secret lesbian or...?

Look...

We'll talk later.

Goodbye.

I need a drink.

-Did you see mum? -You're incredible, Sol.

After all you've done...

We all need a laugh sometimes.

Well mum wasn't laughing.

-And as for the rest of it... -Eliska's face...

If it annoyed her, she can fuck off.

I hate mum acting crazy over her.

Well?

Something strong.

They're in love. Didn't you say it was great?

Mum's in love. Eliska? I don't know...

-What? -Now that she's got money out of her,

-she may leave her. -What? What money?

The money for Eliska's grant.

A large grant

and mum's given her millions and

sold granddad's pine grove.

-Fuck! -She told me about it.

She's broke.

I can't believe it...

She's only after mum's money?

Of course.

She's young, she's pretty,

and gets off with someone 20

years older. Why?

She's a foreigner, and a musician.

And mum has influence...

Poor mum!

Isn't it stuffy in here?

Where shall we go?

We all agree we have to act, right?

I've got an idea.

Mum's always been proud.

If Eliska cheated on her, she'd never forgive her.

You want Eliska to cheat on her?

It's not so difficult.

She's young, pretty, the flesh is weak...

That's awful. We can't do that!

That would be a vicious thing to do. We'd be real

-bitches. -Cut the crap, Elvis.

It's for mum's good.

There's only one problem.

How can we do it?

Look for a lesbian to seduce mum's girlfriend?

No, no, no...

Not there, Sol.

Christ!

What?

That girl, she's a client of mine.

I knew she was getting divorced but I had no idea...

Life's full of surprises.

Well then,

shall we split up?

My husband thinks I'm leaving him for another man.

-He won't believe it's for a girl. -He prefers not to.

Hello.

Hello.

Fancy a drink?

Actually I'm not...

A beer.

From the bottle or do you want a glass?

A glass.

Here's to you.

Haven't seen you here before.

I don't come very often.

Have you got a girlfriend?

No. What about you?

I haven't but my mother has.

You're a big hit.

You enjoy yourself. They're jealous.

That's enough, Sol.

Can you hold on a minute?

Well?

The girl at the bar with short hair. Take a look.

-She's giving me the come-on. -Really?

-Well, me and everybody else. -We could bring Eliska...

-She looks like a man. -Maybe Eliska likes that type.

If she liked men, she wouldn't like mum.

We can't be too fussy.

I said this was madness but you wouldn't listen

and now I feel like a real shit...

I may have a breakdown.

Hey...

From the blonde at the back.

If you want something else,

-I can change it. -Thanks.

-I'll do it! -You'll do what?

-Get off with her. -What!

-That's stupid! -I'm the ideal one.

I even look like mum. Yes, I do.

And I'm a hit with the girls.

Come on, trust me.

-I didn't hear you get up. -I not want to wake you.

Yes...

I'm going to make you some delicious toast with oil.

Hi!

Hello, darling.

Sorry for just dropping in like this...

-It's such a lovely day... -It's a pity to stay in.

And as mum's practising...

We had a great idea.

Hello, what's going on?

-Hello, mum. -Hello...

I can't, I can't...

-What a big boy. -Hi, mum.

We've come to kidnap Eliska...

-To take her to my club. -This is unusual...

Just like ''Little Women''.

-You going too? -Yes, with mummy!

I envy you. Today's Sunday...

I'll come along too.

But mum, what about the piano? Aren't you going to practise?

It'll be there when I come back.

And this miracle may never occur again.

I'll be ready in a minute. Coming?

I knew it.

I knew it...

Oh dear.

That does it.

Those two are inseparable.

We'll have to forget about this mad plan.

What's up? You want to give up?

You want to get off with her in front of mum?

She won't be around all the time.

We'll hire some bikes and leave her behind.

What is it, girls?

Bottoms too fat?

-Hello. -Hello.

That was quite a nap.

Elvira,

I wanted to say thank you.

What for?

For how you all treat Eliska.

She really needs

to feel she belongs.

She only knows me and I'm afraid she'll feel lonely.

She's very sensitive, like you.

You'll be great friends.

Where is everybody?

-Where's Sol? -They're over there.

-Benja wanted a wee. -They're by the boats.

-Are you okay? -Yes.

It's very peaceful, isn't it?

Eliska...

Do you like tattoos?

-Ta what? -Tattoos.

-I've got one. -Yes?

Yes. Want to see it?

I'll show you.

Look.

Eliska,

look.

Hello.

All right?

Nice here, isn't it?

How...?

Go away, Elvira.

Where...?

Are you stupid?

How did you get over here, Sol?

You always mess things up.

No...

Help me!

I said no.

I said no. Get off. Be careful!

Elvira's stupid. She spoiled everything.

I know.

And yet she gets on well with her.

''The brain is deeper than the sea,

for hold them Blue to Blue, the one the other will absorb...''

That's pretty. Who wrote it?

Emily Dickinson,

a very unfortunate woman.

You a writer too, no?

Your mother say you have much talent.

Well she's my mother...

I like much to read a novel by you.

You lend me?

-My novel? -Yes.

It's not worth it...

I understand.

It hard for me too to show things I do.

Somebody see me play piano,

my hands shake,

my heart bang so loud I not hear music.

Only ''boom-boom''...

But you give concerts...

So you'll get over that.

No alternative. Either you jump in pool

or always watch others swim.

Elvira! Ah, those proofs at last.

No... it's my novel.

-Your what? -My novel.

The first version. It needs checking. It's a bit long but

I'd like you to read it.

So you've written a noveItoo?

Not for publication.

Just have a look at it when you can. No obligation.

I won't raise your hopes...

We've all got a novel at the bottom of a drawer.

Come on, Elvira, the proofs.

Surprise!

What are you doing here?

You look pretty!

We've something to tell you.

About the Czech girl.

What about her?

You'll have to do it.

-Do what? -Get off with her.

You're joking.

She likes you. She was with you for hours...

Very close...

You're sick.

-We were just talking. -Then

she must like the intelectual type. But she had the hots for you.

You've got more sex appeal than you think.

Hello, Elvira.

Hello.

Hello.

Hello.

Nice to see you again.

Bernardo's in his office.

I haven't come to see him.

You see,

here's an invitation to my book presentation

and I'd like you to come along.

We could have a drink after...

If you fancy, of course...

I won't be able to...

I have...

a lot... a lot of work.

I see.

Well...

Well, then... bye.

Christ, Elvira!

Well...

-You're irresistible! -With all the sexes!

Out, both of you! Out! Go away!

Promise to get off with Eliska.

-I can't. -Yes, you can.

-Don't be a coward. -Coward.

Coward, coward, coward.

I can't. I can't do something like that!

Get off with mum's girlfriend? It's...

disgusting.

Anyway I'm just not capable of something like that.

Have they seen something in me?

Maybe the lesbian in me

is attracted to Eliska. What do you think?

Every girl wants to take her mother's place.

You think I want Eliska?

You know I don't think you're a lesbian.

Sure, but strange things are happening to me.

A man I like a lot, but run away from...

Last night I dreamed of Piluca Gómez when we were 5...

I was looking at her knickers. Piluca's!

Maybe this is the beginning and I'll end up following girls

in the street. Piluca, when we were 5 years old!

-Calm down. -I can't breathe.

Come on, calm down, Elvira.

-Should I take a pill? -No...

Come here. Hold me. Okay?

Easy, easy...

My little Elvira. Feel better now?

So sweet, so neurotic...

-What are you doing? -What do you think?

l... I don't know.

Touching me up!

No. You've got it wrong. It was a test

to gauge your sexual ambiguity.

Come on, relax.

Take it as... As a therapeutic experiment.

-But... -You're so beautiful...

No, no, no. This... It's not like that...

Sex between therapist and patient is pathological.

And falling for your mother's girlfriend...

Isn't that pathological?

I'll dispel your doubts right now.

Look, if it's to test my femininity,

and that's fine by me...

there are lots of other men who aren't...

Who aren't my therapist.

Sure. It's up to you.

Look for someone who knows more about your desires than me.

You know,

I don't think I'll come...

back here.

Thank you.

This is Gómez from ''Universal''.

-He wants an interview. -Hello.

Excuse me a moment, please.

Great. I didn't expect you.

Sorry I'm late. I couldn't come any earlier.

You haven't missed much anyway.

Coming for a drink?

With them?

I hate that sort of thing.

Forget about them and we can go

wherever you like.

-What do you fancy? -I fancy a good screw.

Hey...

Shall we go to bed?

No,

here, standing up.

Fine, fine.

I want this to be an unforgettable screw.

Be very masculine and rough, okay?

Well, I'll do what I can.

-Okay? -Okay.

Don't kiss me so much,

-just fuck me... -Now?

-Fuck me! -Yes...

Ow! Christ!

-Are you okay? -Yes.

-Sure? -Yes, yes.

-What's the matter? -It's cold...

The wall.

On the bed.

Right.

-Why don't you get on top? -What?

-Me underneath and you on top. -Okay.

Hold me down. You can handle me.

-And call me ''whore''. -What?

Call me ''whore''. Say ''whore''.

-Whore. -No! Put your heart into it.

''Whore! Whore!'' Say ''whore''.

And stick it in me, now!

That's enough! Enough.

Enough.

It's no good this way.

I'm sorry.

So sorry. I've been so stupid...

Now that you mention it, you have.

Are you leaving?

What do you think?

-We could have coffee and talk... -I don't want

to talk!

Look, I know you feel awful.

I like you and you like me,

and you go and spoil it. Why?

I don't know.

But I won't play your game.

Miguel...

Elvira!

What are you doing here?

I wanted to see you.

-I envy you when you swim... -Do you?

You're so sure of yourself.

-I wish I was like you. -It's a question of age.

No, you were always like that.

-Can I ask you a question? -Sounds dangerous...

Go ahead.

When you and mum separated, did you still love her?

A complicated question.

I probably did... In a way.

-Did you ever think of making up? -What is this?

-Homework for your analyst? -No...

To tell the truth,

we'd never have been happy.

We're too different.

I'm a sort of hermit, better with books than people.

I must take after you. I don't understand people...

Or myself either, actually.

You're more like your mother than you think.

You're just not brave enough to be yourself.

Is it brave to say sorry?

That's the most difficult thing of all.

-Come on, let's swim. -I haven't brought my swimsuit.

No excuses, girlie. Follow me.

Swim to me.

Miguel.

What are you doing here?

Waiting for you. I wanted to...

I've got a plant for you.

Goodness,

-it's enormous. -l...

I'll help you to take it up if you like.

I don't know what to say.

Mightn't that be dangerous?

Don't make me feel embarrassed, please.

-Have you been waiting long? -No,

four or five hours.

Come on in.

It needs a lot of light.

-Better up there. Let me take it. -It's ok.

Really? Are you sure? Come on.

It needs watering twice a week.

Not too much water though.

Enough to dampen the soil or it'll lose its colour.

-Okay. -You cut it back in the autumn,

give it some fertilizer occasionally,

and if you talk to it it'll grow beautiful.

Very sensitive...

plants are.

I'll read love poetry to it.

Anyway,

I've written down the instructions,

and call me if you have any questions.

I've got one now.

What?

Have you got

a favourite restaurant?

Yes.

Incredible how things are after yesterday.

Let me make a suggestion.

Let's forget all about yesterday and enjoy the meal.

-Okay? -Okay.

It's so difficult.

When things start to go well,

I always end up

spoiling it.

Tell me if I do anything stupid, ok?

I promise.

Okay.

I love it when you smile.

If you do that, I get nervous and...

If you look at me that way...

How?

Like you are now.

I like it but you'd better not do it.

I don't know another way.

No!

What?

I knew it! But this time I know how it's going to get spoiled.

Hello, mum.

-How are you? -Hi, darling...

You look lovely.

This is my mother, Sofía, and her girlfriend, Eliska.

Hello.

See you later.

Yes, it's mum's favourite restaurant too...

So your mother's the...

Lesbian, yes.

I was going to say pianist.

I've been to her concerts.

Don't pretend you don't mind.

What do you want me to do?

I know you're thinking I'm weird enough without

having a dyke for a mother.

Some things are best said at the beginning,

even though we hardly know each other.

It's you who's saying all this.

-I can read men's minds. -You've only

got one thing right.

You hardly know me.

Oh, I don't fancy the lasagna now.

Stop it, Elvira.

You said to tell you.

You're trying to spoil it.

So? I'll spoil what I like.

-Bring the bill. -No, don't.

Miguel,

neither of us wants to go on.

Eat your lasagna and keep quiet for a while.

Are you telling me what to do?

Take it away or I'll throw up.

You've done it now!

I like you but

I'm not a glutton for punishment so let's forget this.

No, sorry...

Mum!

-I'm stupid! -Are you?

What happened to that handsome boy?

I scared him off.

Why am I like I am?

I haven't the faintest idea, darling.

Character.

Elvira feel things very much.

I should stop crying, shouldn't I?

I could do with a drink. Let's have a drink.

Do what you like but early rise tomorrow.

We're all going to the solicitor's.

Aren't you hard on her?

All right,

you go if you like.

I'll go with you.

Thanks.

Tell me, what do you see?

-People. -Take away the women,

-and what's left? -Men?

They're not men, they're cocks.

Lying in wait.

I'll show you.

Look.

That's Mr. Big Cock.

He's so big and so happy...

In, out, in, out, and that's it.

If you haven't realised, you're stupid.

Oh, a romantic cock.

He wants stroking and kissing and

an hour later, when you've had enough, he's back to the start.

You know all this just looking at boys?

Of course,

it's obvious.

The perfect cock,

pretty, glossy,

horny... He's... gay.

He doesn't like pussy,

and he's a species on the increase.

What can we do?

Ask for another drink.

I already am drunk.

Sure. Me too. But that was the idea.

-Great, right? -Yes.

I'm telling you all this

about cocks and you're not interested...

You know something?

When it comes down to it, penetration...

I don't...

Let's dance.

I'll end up like you, you'll see.

Ow, I fall!

Come on, door. Open.

It always does this and not cos I'm drunk...

I never smoke, but today...

I burn throat, but I like.

What you doing?

Every part of the body is in the foot.

Look, this

is the head.

I feel nothing at all in the head.

Concentrate.

This is the back.

You should know what this is.

I don't know.

-Aren't you ticklish? -No.

-Not at all? -Not at all.

Nothing at all?

You were lying!

This very fun but I have to go.

I won't let you!

No.

Cannot be. Not good.

I'm sorry...

-I'm a shit. -No,

you not shit.

This happen because you and me very good together.

I like being with you.

You're very sweet, very pretty...

But I in love with your mother. Never do her harm.

You know?

Are you okay?

Yes.

Eliska...

Forgive me?

Nothing to forgive.

You won't tell mum, right?

No.

Secret between the two.

Promise?

I promise.

Now sleep.

I go.

No, don't go.

Won't you stay till I'm asleep?

Please.

Yeah?

Mum!

No, I don't know where she is.

No, she didn't

say where she was going.

Okay.

Bye.

It very late. I have to go.

Know where my bag is?

In the living-room.

Eliska, you won't...

You won't tell mum, will you?

I promised, no?

Don't worry.

-Hello. -Do you know what time it is?

I've been very worried.

I sorry...

I rang the police, the hospitals...

I didn't know what to do.

Sofía, pardon me.

It late and I stay with Elvira.

I spoke to her. You haven't been with her.

Yes, yes, I was...

Were you?

So my daughter's lying?

If something's the matter,

tell me now.

Why you not trust me?

Because you don't tell the truth.

Eliska, you can lead your life, come and go

as you like.

I don't want to dictate to you.

But I don't want you to lie either.

I love you very much.

I love you too.

But the point is

things aren't going well.

You no want me with you?

No, not now.

I'm very tired.

-Hi. -Hi.

-Mum's had a row with Eliska. -Has she?

-I'll be right there. -Okay.

Mum, how are you? What's up?

Nothing.

Eliska went out with Elvira for a drink,

and didn't sleep here.

She wouldn't tell me where she'd been

or who with.

-Elvira doesn't know either, -That's bad.

Anyway, the thing about last night isn't so important, mum.

-You think so? -Sure.

Anybody can slip up.

It's another thing

if there's some problem.

We get on very well.

Of course.

But it's just that

I thought there might be

things that pose problems.

I don't know...

Differences between you, not only in age...

Eliska has no-one,

she knows on-one. You're her world.

What if things change?

What do you mean?

Well,

it isn't an equal relationship.

She owes you too much.

Then you told her she could do what she wanted,

and so she did.

I'm even more worried now.

I suppose

I ought to talk things over with her...

I'll go and change

for the solicitor's.

-Where's Elvira? -I don't know.

Dear Sofia...

When you read this,

I not here any more.

I sorry very much to leave this way,

but it best for both of us.

I think

there is not a good future for us.

I...

love you, but there many things that separate us.

I see clear now and

think best finish here before everything much worse.

Please, not look for me.

I think of you in my heart.

How is she?

Well, the tranquilizer's working and she's asleep now.

It's my fault.

It's all my fault.

Come on, Elvira,

don't talk nonsense.

You've no idea...

I tried to get off with Eliska.

You got off with Eliska!

She said no and I made her promise not to tell mum.

And she didn't and they argued.

I said nothing and that's why mum's like this.

My God, what a family I was born into!

Here I am.

How's your mother?

Terrible.

What are you doing? That's for mum!

Well I need a tranquilizer too.

This was in the letter box. I'll go in.

We'll have to look after her.

Here, look at this.

A letter from Eliska.

-Let's take it to mum. -What?

It might depress her even more.

-Go on, open it. -No, no, no. It's mum's.

Give it here.

Well? What does it say?

She's back in Prague.

She's worried about mum and says

she sorting out the papers

to return the money mum lent her.

Then she's going to stay there.

Shit!

This is awful.

All we have to do is bring her back to mum.

You mean go to the Czech Republic?

We'll go wherever we have to.

The three of us.

Don't be ridiculous.

Anyway, I can't,

with things going so badly with Raúl.

What else can we do for mum?

We're going and that's it!

That was good! I was strong, assertive...

Must be that pill.

-Wait... -What?

-I need to make a call. -Don't go back in now. Here...

Use my mobile.

Hello, Miguel here. I'm not in.

Leave a message and I'll call you back.

Hello, Miguel, this is Elvira. Elvira.

I'm not surprised you haven't picked up the phone.

It's months since I heard

from you.

I'm sure you don't want to see me.

I do understand. If I could, I wouldn't want

to see me either. But... anyway,

though I did things badly,

you were one of the best things that ever happened to me.

You'll wonder what the worst things are...

Anyway, it doesn't matter,

Miguel.

I like you a lot and I'm sorry

I'm the way I am.

You'll wonder why I'm

telling you all this. Well...

I'm taking a plane and as it'll crash,

I didn't want to die

-without you knowing. -Elvira!

Elvira.

That costs money.

Right. If Benja gets sick then call the doctor, okay?

I don't know...

That way, that way.

Shit!

Hey...

I'm so sorry. It isn't my fault, I promise you.

-Oh... -It's my husband's.

He won't stop calling me.

So argue with him, not me.

I won't argue with anybody.

-Really? -No.

-It's a bad knock. Look at the wing. -I know.

-But yours is worse. -What?

We really appreciate this lift.

I'd gladly take you to Prague

-but I have to work. -Of course.

-What's your firm's name? -''Plant yourself'.

What a good idea.

Look,

you must give me your phone number for...

-the papers and all that. -Of course.

-What if they don't know her? -We'll ask

-in the office. -Will they have the files

-of the ex-students? -Look.

She's more than an ex-student.

This is embarrassing. It can't be here.

Elvira!

Hello.

See? This is the wrong place.

Eliska, the pianist.

Eliska?

-Eliska! -What is it, Vaclav?

Somebody for you.

What...?

Hi.

What you doing here?

-We've come to talk to you. -Yes, but we didn't know...

Come in.

We weren't sure...

Eliska, are those...?

My brothers.

That's my grandmother.

She looks after them.

My parents died in accident not much long ago.

Go on to your room.

You've got a large family.

Sit down.

He says do you want a drink.

-No, thanks. -No...

I'd like a glass of water.

My mouth's dry.

Water.

Water? Right away.

Right,

now where do we begin?

We've come over to...

-to... -To ask you to go back to mum.

-Here we are. -Thanks.

Don't mention it.

I'm sure you won't give a damn that we're sorry.

-Elvira, I... -No, let me

finish, please.

Don't think of us.

Think of mum.

The concert was a disaster. She collapsed.

what's the matter with her? Is she i

Depression.

Eliska, she misses you very, very much.

I very sorry that Sofía sad.

I feel bad also.

And...

really I love your mother.

At first I was afraid of changing her life so much.

But,

your mother very brave.

She say,

''lf this happen to me, why not accept?''

Then come back with us.

Cannot be.

Here my life, my place, my family.

Here I am somebody.

There I am nobody.

-That's wrong. To mum you're everything. -Go on, Eliska, please...

What can we say to convince you?

Do not insist.

I thought a lot, my decision not change.

Wait.

You've forgotten this.

That was very nice of him.

-Okay. -Okay?

-You two aren't coming... -No, we're going to pack.

So do we give up?

Anyway, what else can we do?

Stand here crying or what?

I'll try and get him to say something to his sister. Okay?

I'll tell you later.

Let's go.

-I don't believe it. -That's how it is.

And it's best to accept defeat.

We'd better go back to Madrid and take care of mum.

Coming back to the hotel?

I think I'll go for a walk, okay?

Okay.

Where's Sol?

Fraternizing with the Czechs.

Shall we have a drink? We should celebrate.

-Sure. -I'm going to use

this self-assertion high I'm on

to sort a few things out...

Can you lend me your keys?

They're all yours.

-Has your sister got a driving licence? -No.

She never passed the test.

Well! The girl who went missing in action!

Good to see you.

We thought a UFO had got you.

I'm sorry, Bernardo.

-Look, I just came... -No,

you look, Elvira.

If you thought this was

a holiday club or something, you're wrong.

Where have you been? I hope

you've got a good excuse,

although it won't be any use.

Well I have,

but I won't tell you.

Don't annoy me...

Or what? You'll fire me?

Go ahead.

What?

The thing is, Bernardo,

I don't want to work for you.

Your type

is the worst. Exploiting people,

paying shit wages and all for

our own good, right?

I'd rather starve, but I don't think I will,

because finding an equally shitty job will be easy.

Elvira...

You'll be sorry.

I doubt it.

And if ever I was sorry, I wouldn't tell you.

-Ernesto! -Elvira!

I knew you'd be back.

My little fish!

It's all right, my babies.

You'll be all right.

You'll be all right. Don't worry.

Hey, wait a minute, Elvira...

I don't mind you raping me but

let me finish shaving, okay?

I've got a confession to make.

What?

I've read your novel.

-What? -Where you work...

That pig gave it to you!

I liked it.

-Did you hear me? -What?

I said I liked it.

-Really? -Yes, very much.

It's very good.

And it's original and funny,

with a well-structured plot.

It grabs hold of you from the start.

I've a very good publisher friend.

I'm sure he'll love it.

-A publisher? -Yes.

You're interested in publishing your novel, aren't you?

And if they didn't print it?

Even with your influence.

And if they did, how would I know they liked it

and it wasn't just a favour to you?

Stop, stop...

Stop, please.

You're right.

I just can't help it.

I don't know how you can like me so much.

Because you're nice, attractive

and with those tits

and that bum...

No,

it's because you know I've got talent.

Let me, I'm stronger than you.

Tough guy.

Now we pack some soil around it nice and tight,

so it won't move. Get that sack, please.

Divorce has done you good.

You look great.

At last you look your real age.

I'm taking a little more care of myself.

What do you think of Javier?

As a gardener, marvellous.

Really, he's charming.

Who's thirsty?

Don't worry, I'll pour.

I'll be the ideal mother-in-law.

-Let's lay the table. -Javier, want a beer?

-Yes, please. -Benja, help me with the sack.

Well?

-Benja seems very happy with Javier. -He is.

-The only one who isn't is Raúl. -Logical.

Yes.

He's afraid he'll turn his son into a radical ecologist,

and that instead of studying law,

he'll go around curing mad cows.

How could you have stayed with that fascist so long?

-He voted socialist. -Exactly.

Mummy, look what I've got!

-A disgusting worm! -Oh, that's horrible!

I'll get it.

It isn't necessary, really...

Don't be silly, I had to do it sooner or later.

Really.

Eliska, there's a telegram for you. Mum's got it.

You've got so much crap here.

Pepito! I thought he was dead.

What!

He's mine!

Yes, it's an expulsion order.

What's the matter?

-They're kicking Eliska out. -The police.

Why?

I'm an illegal immigrant.

I have no job. Or grant.

What can we do?

With this in our hands, nothing.

We must think of something.

Well, well, well...

This marvellous thing is saying ''eat me.''

You haven't sat down yet.

I've got an idea.

You aren't married, are you?

No. Why?

You in a hurry?

More or less...

I do.

With the ceremony now over, I'd like to say a few words.

For me this is a very special moment,

this opportunity

to join together through holy matrimony

these people of different nationalities.

The loving couple may now kiss.

Long live the happy couple!

A photo.

Come back here!

TO OUR PARENTS