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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 WWW.MY-SUBS.CO 1 00:00:01,868 --> 00:00:03,601 Maybe we should take a break, sir. 2 00:00:03,634 --> 00:00:05,567 We've been at this for hours. 3 00:00:05,601 --> 00:00:09,133 Charlie, no one ever said running this city was easy.. 4 00:00:09,167 --> 00:00:11,300 Okay. Your next piece of fan mail 5 00:00:11,334 --> 00:00:13,033 comes from Billy klug, age 9.. 6 00:00:13,067 --> 00:00:15,367 "Dear Mr. Mayor, I'm in the hospital.. 7 00:00:15,400 --> 00:00:18,067 If you sent me your photo, it would make me happy.". 8 00:00:18,100 --> 00:00:20,467 Hand me a photo. 9 00:00:20,501 --> 00:00:22,334 I'm gonna sign this one personally.. 10 00:00:27,167 --> 00:00:30,334 This one is from a 10th-grader from public school 104. 11 00:00:30,367 --> 00:00:32,868 I just approved a pay raise for their teachers.. 12 00:00:32,901 --> 00:00:35,801 "Mr. Mayor, I think you are more better 13 00:00:35,834 --> 00:00:37,400 than our last mayor.". 14 00:00:37,434 --> 00:00:40,133 Can we get our money back?. 15 00:00:40,167 --> 00:00:43,300 Oh, I'm sorry about that, Stuart.. 16 00:00:43,334 --> 00:00:44,567 "Winston.... 17 00:00:44,601 --> 00:00:47,067 The next time I see you, you are a dead man." 18 00:00:47,100 --> 00:00:50,267 I said I was sorry.. 19 00:00:51,868 --> 00:00:53,367 It sounds like a death threat. 20 00:00:53,400 --> 00:00:57,234 "I find your temerity beyond reproach.". 21 00:00:57,267 --> 00:00:58,467 Well, we know one thing... 22 00:00:58,501 --> 00:01:00,634 this guy didn't go to p.S. 104.. 23 00:01:27,834 --> 00:01:29,601 Yes, I'll hold.. 24 00:01:36,667 --> 00:01:37,934 Don't move.. 25 00:01:37,968 --> 00:01:40,901 There's something on that desk.. 26 00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:42,234 Be nice. 27 00:01:42,267 --> 00:01:44,200 I couldn't leave rags home today.. 28 00:01:44,234 --> 00:01:45,801 We have a rat problem.. 29 00:01:45,834 --> 00:01:48,567 Yeah, they keep trying to mate with him.. 30 00:01:49,968 --> 00:01:52,634 His hair looks a little longer.. 31 00:01:52,667 --> 00:01:55,701 Has he been dipping in your Rogaine?. 32 00:01:55,734 --> 00:01:59,601 These are hair extensions.. 33 00:01:59,634 --> 00:02:02,234 Ready for our meeting with the baseball guy?. 34 00:02:02,267 --> 00:02:04,734 Yep. Remember, we just want them to move 35 00:02:04,767 --> 00:02:06,367 their team to staten island, 36 00:02:06,400 --> 00:02:07,634 so please don't start 37 00:02:07,667 --> 00:02:09,434 one of your boring baseball lectures.. 38 00:02:09,467 --> 00:02:12,601 So this morning when I explained how expansion is watering down 39 00:02:12,634 --> 00:02:14,767 major league pitching, that was boring?. 40 00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:22,834 Sorry to keep you waiting, Mr. claremont. 41 00:02:22,868 --> 00:02:23,901 I'm Charlie Crawford. 42 00:02:23,934 --> 00:02:25,367 Charlie Crawford.. 43 00:02:25,400 --> 00:02:26,934 You look familiar.. 44 00:02:26,968 --> 00:02:28,167 Were you in the service?. 45 00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:30,534 Does community service count?. 46 00:02:32,567 --> 00:02:35,467 You played third base for weston high school. 47 00:02:35,501 --> 00:02:36,968 I was a scout back then.. 48 00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:38,501 You got a great memory.. 49 00:02:38,534 --> 00:02:41,501 You had some, uh, pretty good stats your senior year.. 50 00:02:41,534 --> 00:02:45,234 Did I? Because for me it was all about the team.. 51 00:02:45,267 --> 00:02:49,400 The fact that I hit .407 with 59 rbis and 12 dingers... 52 00:02:49,434 --> 00:02:51,033 that was just gravy. 53 00:02:51,067 --> 00:02:53,267 Charlie, let's focus on what's important.. 54 00:02:53,300 --> 00:02:54,334 You're right. 55 00:02:54,367 --> 00:02:56,834 I was also a great fielder. 56 00:02:56,868 --> 00:02:59,567 I'll come back.. 57 00:03:01,567 --> 00:03:04,501 Well, we'd like to move the team as soon as possible.. 58 00:03:04,534 --> 00:03:06,767 In fact, we have a tryout game tomorrow.. 59 00:03:06,801 --> 00:03:08,100 Can anyone try out for the team?. 60 00:03:08,133 --> 00:03:09,200 Not anyone.. 61 00:03:09,234 --> 00:03:10,601 You need to have really excelled 62 00:03:10,634 --> 00:03:12,200 at the high school and college level.. 63 00:03:12,234 --> 00:03:15,667 Like someone who was mvp at weston high 64 00:03:15,701 --> 00:03:17,400 three years running?. 65 00:03:17,434 --> 00:03:19,000 If you're interested in the tryout, 66 00:03:19,033 --> 00:03:20,100 I can get you in the game. 67 00:03:20,133 --> 00:03:22,501 I don't know. 68 00:03:22,534 --> 00:03:25,834 I'm a very busy man.. 69 00:03:28,467 --> 00:03:30,868 I might be able to clear some time in the afternoon.. 70 00:03:30,901 --> 00:03:32,100 The game's in the morning.. 71 00:03:32,133 --> 00:03:34,467 Perfect.. 72 00:03:34,501 --> 00:03:37,200 Remember the play I made to win the championship?. 73 00:03:37,234 --> 00:03:39,634 It was a hot smash down the third-base line. 74 00:03:39,667 --> 00:03:42,467 I snared it, came up firing... do you remember that?. 75 00:03:42,501 --> 00:03:43,634 Good God!. 76 00:03:43,667 --> 00:03:45,133 That was some play, huh?. 77 00:03:45,167 --> 00:03:47,634 No, there's a giant possum behind us.. 78 00:03:52,267 --> 00:03:55,801 Sorry!. 79 00:03:59,033 --> 00:04:00,934 Why would anyone want to kill me?. 80 00:04:00,968 --> 00:04:04,133 Public figures are often targeted by sociopaths.. 81 00:04:04,167 --> 00:04:05,501 Plus you're an easy mark.. 82 00:04:05,534 --> 00:04:07,200 Any guy with half a brain and a rifle 83 00:04:07,234 --> 00:04:09,167 could pop your head off like a coconut. 84 00:04:11,334 --> 00:04:13,534 Paul, let's switch seats.. 85 00:04:13,567 --> 00:04:16,400 Mr. Mayor, this is Mike viola from downtown security.. 86 00:04:16,434 --> 00:04:18,734 Thank you, Angie. Downtown security?. 87 00:04:18,767 --> 00:04:20,868 The mayor hired us to protect him.. 88 00:04:20,901 --> 00:04:24,334 Your bodyguard would take a bullet for me. True?. 89 00:04:24,367 --> 00:04:26,501 Yes, sir. Excellent.. 90 00:04:27,334 --> 00:04:29,534 Less excellent for you.. 91 00:04:29,567 --> 00:04:31,501 Now, our first order of business 92 00:04:31,534 --> 00:04:33,467 is to assign you all code names.. 93 00:04:33,501 --> 00:04:35,100 Mr. Mayor, you're silver fox.. 94 00:04:35,133 --> 00:04:36,534 Nice.. 95 00:04:36,567 --> 00:04:39,100 Mr. bondek, you're lone wolf.. 96 00:04:39,133 --> 00:04:40,100 Sweet.. 97 00:04:40,133 --> 00:04:41,567 What's mine?. 98 00:04:41,601 --> 00:04:43,868 Your code name is flapjack.. 99 00:04:45,501 --> 00:04:50,100 Flapjack?! How come they get cool names... I get flapjack?!. 100 00:04:50,133 --> 00:04:51,400 They're randomly assigned.. 101 00:04:51,434 --> 00:04:54,634 All my life I've been stuck with lousy nicknames.. 102 00:04:54,667 --> 00:04:57,334 In high school I was called buttcake.. 103 00:04:57,367 --> 00:05:00,567 Please, I'm begging you... anything but flapjack.. 104 00:05:00,601 --> 00:05:01,801 Viola to command center.. 105 00:05:01,834 --> 00:05:04,033 Mr. lassiter's code name is no longer flapjack.. 106 00:05:04,067 --> 00:05:05,868 Thank you it's now buttcake.. 107 00:05:08,434 --> 00:05:09,934 Where the hell were you? 108 00:05:09,968 --> 00:05:11,634 I have been waiting for 45 minutes. 109 00:05:11,667 --> 00:05:14,000 I was down in accounting.. 110 00:05:16,067 --> 00:05:18,000 You know those bean counters.. 111 00:05:18,033 --> 00:05:20,567 All they understand is brute force.. 112 00:05:22,300 --> 00:05:24,067 I was at the batting cages.. 113 00:05:24,100 --> 00:05:25,634 Well, now that you're here, 114 00:05:25,667 --> 00:05:28,234 I want to show you some research that I did on the stadium. 115 00:05:30,367 --> 00:05:33,968 I've gathered all the figures, and if you look at this.... 116 00:05:35,534 --> 00:05:38,100 I'm Bob costas, and, folks, this is it... 117 00:05:38,133 --> 00:05:41,667 world series, game 7, all tied up, bottom of the 9th.. 118 00:05:41,701 --> 00:05:44,100 At the plate, Charlie Crawford... 119 00:05:44,133 --> 00:05:46,767 all-star game mvp, golden glove winner, 120 00:05:46,801 --> 00:05:50,467 and occasional backup guitarist for the rolling stones.. 121 00:05:52,234 --> 00:05:54,200 It's interesting to note 122 00:05:54,234 --> 00:05:58,701 that Crawford has dedicated this game to his girlfriends,. 123 00:05:58,734 --> 00:06:01,734 Elle MacPherson and Gwyneth paltrow.. 124 00:06:01,767 --> 00:06:03,868 Here's the pitch.. 125 00:06:06,133 --> 00:06:08,634 Swing and a long drive, way back and gone... 126 00:06:08,667 --> 00:06:09,834 a home run!. 127 00:06:09,868 --> 00:06:12,434 Charlie Crawford has won the world series 128 00:06:12,467 --> 00:06:14,634 for the New York Yankees.. 129 00:06:14,667 --> 00:06:18,200 What a fitting end to a stellar season.. 130 00:06:18,234 --> 00:06:20,734 You know, a lot of eyebrows were raised 131 00:06:20,767 --> 00:06:22,133 when this handsome devil 132 00:06:22,167 --> 00:06:25,501 broke the billion-dollar salary mark, 133 00:06:25,534 --> 00:06:27,601 but I say he's worth every penny.. 134 00:06:27,634 --> 00:06:29,300 Yah!. 135 00:06:29,334 --> 00:06:30,901 Hyah!. 136 00:06:30,934 --> 00:06:32,534 Yah!. 137 00:06:32,567 --> 00:06:34,234 Yah!. 138 00:06:40,701 --> 00:06:42,934 Aaaaaaah!. 139 00:06:42,968 --> 00:06:44,200 Hyah!. 140 00:06:44,234 --> 00:06:47,300 Charlie! Charlie! Charlie! 141 00:06:47,334 --> 00:06:49,000 Charlie.... 142 00:06:49,033 --> 00:06:50,167 Hyah!. 143 00:06:51,601 --> 00:06:55,501 Yeah, that's the best research I've ever seen.. 144 00:06:55,534 --> 00:06:58,767 Focus. We have that stadium meeting first thing tomorrow.. 145 00:06:58,801 --> 00:07:01,100 Oh, about that... would it be cool if I skipped it 146 00:07:01,133 --> 00:07:03,667 and tried out for a minor-league baseball team?. 147 00:07:03,701 --> 00:07:04,901 Sure, fine.. 148 00:07:04,934 --> 00:07:06,033 Why not?. 149 00:07:06,067 --> 00:07:09,400 In fact, I'll skip the meeting, too, 150 00:07:09,434 --> 00:07:12,234 so I can fly to L.A. And become a laker girl.. 151 00:07:12,267 --> 00:07:14,167 This is important.. 152 00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:16,667 Is this some sort of midlife crisis?. 153 00:07:16,701 --> 00:07:19,267 Why can't you just go bald and buy a Porsche 154 00:07:19,300 --> 00:07:20,801 like normal men?. 155 00:07:20,834 --> 00:07:23,667 Look, growing up, I was the best ballplayer 156 00:07:23,701 --> 00:07:25,534 my high school had ever seen.. 157 00:07:25,567 --> 00:07:28,267 Didn't you go to the same school as Reggie Jackson?. 158 00:07:28,300 --> 00:07:31,767 He didn't have my flair.. 159 00:07:33,734 --> 00:07:36,601 Anyway, my coach pulled some strings 160 00:07:36,634 --> 00:07:38,467 and got me a pro tryout. 161 00:07:38,501 --> 00:07:41,100 I was gonna blow everybody away.. 162 00:07:41,133 --> 00:07:43,100 But when I got down there, 163 00:07:43,133 --> 00:07:46,300 I couldn't believe the caliber of talent.. 164 00:07:46,334 --> 00:07:50,701 So I lost my nerve and walked straight into the nearest bar.. 165 00:07:50,734 --> 00:07:52,100 That's terrible.. 166 00:07:52,133 --> 00:07:55,100 Not really. It was nickel beer night. 167 00:07:55,133 --> 00:07:56,968 I meant quitting.. 168 00:07:57,000 --> 00:08:00,601 Not a week goes by that I don't think, "what if." . 169 00:08:00,634 --> 00:08:02,634 That's why I have to do this, Caitlin. 170 00:08:02,667 --> 00:08:04,267 I gotta put this behind me. 171 00:08:04,300 --> 00:08:07,100 I just wanna go out there and just get one hit. 172 00:08:07,133 --> 00:08:08,767 I understand. 173 00:08:08,801 --> 00:08:11,467 I know what it's like to have an unfulfilled dream.. 174 00:08:11,501 --> 00:08:13,133 Laker girl? 175 00:08:13,167 --> 00:08:17,200 I had more spirit than they ever knew.. 176 00:08:21,033 --> 00:08:23,267 The mayor's approval rating is up 177 00:08:23,300 --> 00:08:24,567 with the elderly and women.. 178 00:08:24,601 --> 00:08:26,067 But if you look at the next chart, 179 00:08:26,100 --> 00:08:28,067 one thing becomes obvious.. 180 00:08:30,067 --> 00:08:32,868 It's obvious Paul was the least popular guy at hedonism.. 181 00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:36,834 All right, Stuart.... 182 00:08:36,868 --> 00:08:39,100 Where'd you get the picture?. 183 00:08:39,133 --> 00:08:40,667 Hey, it's not my fault 184 00:08:40,701 --> 00:08:43,567 you left your vacation slides locked in your desk. 185 00:08:43,601 --> 00:08:46,200 Stuart, I'm very disappointed with you.. 186 00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:48,200 Thank you, sir. 187 00:08:48,234 --> 00:08:51,167 I would rather have seen the one of Paul's hula lesson.. 188 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:54,133 Sir, give me some credit.. 189 00:09:00,133 --> 00:09:01,501 Excuse me, Stuart. 190 00:09:01,534 --> 00:09:04,300 I refuse to stay here and be humiliated.. 191 00:09:06,667 --> 00:09:08,200 Buttcake on the move.. 192 00:09:08,234 --> 00:09:11,234 Mr. lassiter, after a security review of city hall, 193 00:09:11,267 --> 00:09:13,801 we determined that being press secretary 194 00:09:13,834 --> 00:09:15,767 puts you at a very high risk.. 195 00:09:15,801 --> 00:09:18,133 Oh, great... like my day hasn't been bad enough.. 196 00:09:18,167 --> 00:09:20,300 We've decided, if you would like, 197 00:09:20,334 --> 00:09:21,834 that we will provide you 198 00:09:21,868 --> 00:09:24,267 with your own personal security guard.. 199 00:09:24,300 --> 00:09:26,234 My own personal security guard 200 00:09:26,267 --> 00:09:28,968 that would protect me from anyone?. 201 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:30,067 That's correct, sir.. 202 00:09:30,100 --> 00:09:34,334 Yes, I think I'd like that.. 203 00:09:40,901 --> 00:09:44,033 Hi. I'm trying to find a pitcher named Carson.. 204 00:09:44,067 --> 00:09:47,667 Yeah, he's in the locker room. Just look for number 33.. 205 00:09:47,701 --> 00:09:49,234 Hi. Um.... 206 00:09:49,267 --> 00:09:52,901 Which one of you is Carson?. 207 00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:56,434 I mean the real Carson. 208 00:09:58,467 --> 00:09:59,467 I'm carrying his baby.. 209 00:10:05,534 --> 00:10:09,133 Look, it's not that the night we spent together 210 00:10:09,167 --> 00:10:10,567 wasn't special... 211 00:10:10,601 --> 00:10:12,667 I'm not pregnant.. 212 00:10:12,701 --> 00:10:14,234 Oh, thank God.. 213 00:10:14,267 --> 00:10:17,400 You're pitching today, right? 214 00:10:17,434 --> 00:10:20,100 I need you to take it easy on one of the batters. 215 00:10:20,133 --> 00:10:21,267 I don't do that.. 216 00:10:21,300 --> 00:10:23,234 You know, you're really cute.. 217 00:10:23,267 --> 00:10:24,834 Who's the guy? 218 00:10:32,100 --> 00:10:33,534 Paul, did you just kick me?. 219 00:10:33,567 --> 00:10:35,167 Why, yes, I did.. 220 00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:36,634 Who's this guy? 221 00:10:36,667 --> 00:10:39,834 Vince is my new personal security guard.. 222 00:10:39,868 --> 00:10:44,200 He's a former green beret and has a black belt in karate.. 223 00:10:46,534 --> 00:10:49,400 Is there a problem here, Mr. lassiter? 224 00:10:49,434 --> 00:10:50,567 I'm not sure.. 225 00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:53,801 Is there a problem, Stuart?. 226 00:10:53,834 --> 00:10:54,934 Heh heh. No.. 227 00:10:54,968 --> 00:10:56,334 No problem here... 228 00:10:56,367 --> 00:10:59,367 just talking with my good buddy Paul. 229 00:10:59,400 --> 00:11:00,501 Vince.... 230 00:11:00,534 --> 00:11:02,801 Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!. 231 00:11:02,834 --> 00:11:04,400 Ow! Make him stop!. 232 00:11:04,434 --> 00:11:06,501 That's enough for now.. 233 00:11:21,400 --> 00:11:23,434 How'd you get the pitcher to agree 234 00:11:23,467 --> 00:11:24,968 to take it easy on Charlie? 235 00:11:25,033 --> 00:11:28,000 I just promised I'd attend his next game... And his prom.. 236 00:11:29,501 --> 00:11:31,434 What makes you think he'll actually do it?. 237 00:11:32,868 --> 00:11:36,033 Just a hunch.. 238 00:12:03,534 --> 00:12:05,400 Way to go, Charlie!. 239 00:12:05,434 --> 00:12:08,467 You the man! Whoo!. 240 00:12:08,501 --> 00:12:10,901 Oh, this is fantastic. Charlie got his hit.. 241 00:12:10,934 --> 00:12:13,467 Now he can forget about baseball and move on.. 242 00:12:17,067 --> 00:12:20,501 Ha ha ha! I am so making this team!. 243 00:12:23,767 --> 00:12:26,567 So, what are you wearing to the prom?. 244 00:12:32,400 --> 00:12:34,400 Hey. It's my good buddy Carter 245 00:12:34,434 --> 00:12:35,767 and his trusty.... 246 00:12:35,801 --> 00:12:39,300 All right, what is this thing?. 247 00:12:39,334 --> 00:12:42,133 Rags is a rare, prizewinning breed.. 248 00:12:42,167 --> 00:12:43,534 He's 1/2 schnauzer, 249 00:12:43,567 --> 00:12:47,868 a 1/4 bichon, 3/5 cockapoo, 1/5 shih tzu, 250 00:12:47,901 --> 00:12:50,033 and 1/5... Woodchuck.. 251 00:12:51,267 --> 00:12:52,868 You're in a pretty good mood.. 252 00:12:52,901 --> 00:12:54,667 And why shouldn't I be?. 253 00:12:54,701 --> 00:12:58,634 As of today, I am a legitimate major league prospect. 254 00:12:58,667 --> 00:13:00,534 Charlie, it was just one home run.. 255 00:13:00,567 --> 00:13:02,367 One home run off their top draft pick.. 256 00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:04,868 That guy's gonna be throwing for the Yankees next year.. 257 00:13:04,901 --> 00:13:07,334 If I do well in the next game, who knows?! 258 00:13:07,367 --> 00:13:09,133 I could make the team. 259 00:13:09,167 --> 00:13:11,067 I love this little guy.. 260 00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:16,667 Here. He might need this. 261 00:13:20,067 --> 00:13:21,701 Caitlin... You gotta tell Charlie 262 00:13:21,734 --> 00:13:23,400 that pitcher wasn't really trying.. 263 00:13:23,434 --> 00:13:25,234 He's getting completely carried away.. 264 00:13:25,267 --> 00:13:27,467 How do you tell a man his dream is over?. 265 00:13:27,501 --> 00:13:29,567 If memory serves, you tell him, 266 00:13:29,601 --> 00:13:31,767 "you can't sing, you can't dance, 267 00:13:31,801 --> 00:13:34,167 and you look lousy in that cat suit.". 268 00:13:38,300 --> 00:13:39,634 Hey, Stuart.... 269 00:13:39,667 --> 00:13:43,133 Did you finish proofreading my press release?. 270 00:13:43,167 --> 00:13:44,334 Yes.. 271 00:13:44,367 --> 00:13:47,367 All right. Run down to Richie's deli... 272 00:13:47,400 --> 00:13:49,434 pick me up a tuna salad sandwich.. 273 00:13:49,467 --> 00:13:53,934 Oh, make sure you pick out all the celery bits. 274 00:13:53,968 --> 00:13:57,767 Paul... One day you are going to pay for this.. 275 00:13:57,801 --> 00:14:00,400 Oh, I'm shaking in my shoes... 276 00:14:00,434 --> 00:14:02,601 the ones you just shined.. 277 00:14:02,634 --> 00:14:05,434 Oh, hey! Did you guys hear the news?!. 278 00:14:05,467 --> 00:14:07,067 It turns out this threat against me 279 00:14:07,100 --> 00:14:09,033 was nothing but a prank by a couple of kids.. 280 00:14:09,067 --> 00:14:10,567 Can you believe that?. 281 00:14:10,601 --> 00:14:13,901 The good news is we don't need the security any longer, 282 00:14:13,934 --> 00:14:15,601 so thanks, guys, very much.. 283 00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:24,868 Mr. Mayor... Mr. Mayor!. 284 00:14:24,901 --> 00:14:28,167 Mr. Mayor, couldn't we just keep on a few security guards, 285 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:29,467 just for good luck?. 286 00:14:29,501 --> 00:14:32,300 There's no need as long as I'm out of danger, Paul.. 287 00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:39,534 "Mr. Mayor... You will soon be dead 288 00:14:39,567 --> 00:14:42,868 because I'm going to chop your head off.". 289 00:14:48,234 --> 00:14:50,934 I am a genius.. 290 00:14:55,901 --> 00:14:59,200 If anyone's car is parked behind center field, 291 00:14:59,234 --> 00:15:01,334 you might want to move it now.. 292 00:15:02,968 --> 00:15:05,400 Looks like Charlie's on his own.. 293 00:15:05,434 --> 00:15:07,434 Couldn't make another deal with the pitcher?. 294 00:15:07,467 --> 00:15:08,767 He's back with his girlfriend.. 295 00:15:08,801 --> 00:15:10,334 All right, kid.. 296 00:15:10,367 --> 00:15:12,968 Throw me that weak-ass... Strike one!. 297 00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:16,234 What the hell was that?. 298 00:15:17,501 --> 00:15:19,868 Okay. I got caught off guard.. 299 00:15:19,901 --> 00:15:23,701 Dig in... Head down... Watch it.. 300 00:15:23,734 --> 00:15:25,100 Watch it.. 301 00:15:27,801 --> 00:15:28,934 Strike two!. 302 00:15:30,434 --> 00:15:33,634 He wasn't throwing this hard yesterday.. 303 00:15:33,667 --> 00:15:35,200 Your hot friend told him not to.. 304 00:15:35,234 --> 00:15:36,667 What?. 305 00:15:36,701 --> 00:15:38,200 She said she'd go on a date with him 306 00:15:38,234 --> 00:15:39,934 if he served you a couple meatballs. 307 00:15:39,968 --> 00:15:42,400 I'm gonna strike out like Paul at a nightclub.. 308 00:15:42,434 --> 00:15:44,334 You played this game for 20 years.. 309 00:15:44,367 --> 00:15:45,834 You know how to get on base.. 310 00:15:49,033 --> 00:15:52,067 Dead ball! Take your base!. 311 00:15:53,701 --> 00:15:56,667 Oh, man, that hurt. 312 00:15:56,701 --> 00:16:00,334 I still have three more at-bats.. 313 00:16:00,367 --> 00:16:03,267 Hey, Stuart. What you eating?. 314 00:16:03,300 --> 00:16:05,701 Corned beef on rye.. 315 00:16:05,734 --> 00:16:10,868 Hmm. Looks good.. 316 00:16:10,901 --> 00:16:14,534 You realize your thug isn't here to protect you anymore. 317 00:16:21,434 --> 00:16:23,968 Angie, call an ambulance.. 318 00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:26,968 Tell them someone got thrown out a window two minutes from now.. 319 00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:28,634 Hey, have you heard?! 320 00:16:28,667 --> 00:16:31,367 I got another threatening letter.. 321 00:16:31,400 --> 00:16:33,801 Sir, that's terrible.. 322 00:16:33,834 --> 00:16:36,133 Welcome back, Vince.. 323 00:16:36,167 --> 00:16:38,067 Does this look familiar, Mr. lassiter?. 324 00:16:38,100 --> 00:16:40,501 No, no, not really.. 325 00:16:41,868 --> 00:16:44,534 Look what we found on the letter, sir.. 326 00:16:47,067 --> 00:16:48,901 I hate to say this, Paul, 327 00:16:48,934 --> 00:16:52,534 but your wanting to kill me may color my judgment 328 00:16:52,567 --> 00:16:53,834 come bonus time.. 329 00:16:53,868 --> 00:16:54,834 Sir, I'm sorry. 330 00:16:54,868 --> 00:16:57,067 I never meant to chop your head off.. 331 00:16:57,100 --> 00:17:00,300 It's just that Stuart's been picking on me a lot lately, 332 00:17:00,334 --> 00:17:03,634 and having a security guard allowed me to stand up to him.. 333 00:17:03,667 --> 00:17:06,868 You know, when I was in the 10th grade, 334 00:17:06,901 --> 00:17:10,601 there was a bully who wouldn't leave me alone.. 335 00:17:10,634 --> 00:17:14,100 For six months I lived in fear of this guy, 336 00:17:14,133 --> 00:17:18,033 and then one day I mustered up all of my courage, 337 00:17:18,067 --> 00:17:20,267 and I put an end to it. How? 338 00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:23,467 I had my dad buy him a new pair of skis.. 339 00:17:25,734 --> 00:17:28,167 In hindsight, I wish I hadn't. 340 00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:31,200 I wish I had looked him straight in the eye 341 00:17:31,234 --> 00:17:32,501 and said... 342 00:17:32,534 --> 00:17:35,367 "I have one thing to say to you... 343 00:17:35,400 --> 00:17:39,501 I will not... Be... Pushed... Around.". 344 00:17:39,534 --> 00:17:40,534 Thank you, sir.. 345 00:17:40,567 --> 00:17:42,601 That's just what I needed to hear.. 346 00:17:42,634 --> 00:17:45,601 That's my boy. Go get 'em! 347 00:17:49,133 --> 00:17:53,400 Stuart, I've got one thing to say to you... 348 00:17:53,434 --> 00:17:56,601 what kind of skis do you like?. 349 00:18:02,167 --> 00:18:03,801 So, how you doing?. 350 00:18:03,834 --> 00:18:06,033 How do you think I'm doing? 351 00:18:06,067 --> 00:18:08,367 I got hit by a pitch, made three errors, 352 00:18:08,400 --> 00:18:09,868 and the crowd is booing me.. 353 00:18:09,901 --> 00:18:12,968 They're not booing you, Charlie.. 354 00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:16,834 They're saying, "Charlie-e-e-e-o-o-o-ooh!" 355 00:18:16,868 --> 00:18:20,033 I think I did hear one guy booing. 356 00:18:20,067 --> 00:18:22,300 I'm gonna go talk to him.. 357 00:18:22,334 --> 00:18:24,467 Look on the bright side.. 358 00:18:24,501 --> 00:18:28,300 At least you got that great hit yesterday.. 359 00:18:28,334 --> 00:18:29,501 Not really. 360 00:18:29,534 --> 00:18:31,234 I know about you and that pitcher.. 361 00:18:31,267 --> 00:18:33,901 First he blows me off for the prom, 362 00:18:33,934 --> 00:18:35,634 and now he tells on me?!. 363 00:18:35,667 --> 00:18:37,033 Thanks a lot, Caitlin.. 364 00:18:37,067 --> 00:18:38,534 You made me look like a real idiot. 365 00:18:38,567 --> 00:18:40,300 I was just trying to help you. 366 00:18:40,334 --> 00:18:42,634 I knew how important this was to you, 367 00:18:42,667 --> 00:18:45,100 and I didn't want you to be disappointed.. 368 00:18:45,133 --> 00:18:47,734 Well, I've had enough humiliation for one day. 369 00:18:47,767 --> 00:18:49,067 I'm getting outta here.. 370 00:18:49,100 --> 00:18:50,834 So you're just gonna walk away?. 371 00:18:50,868 --> 00:18:52,934 Actually, I could use a ride.. 372 00:18:52,968 --> 00:18:55,934 Maybe you can go flash a cabby for me. 373 00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:57,801 Charlie, you can't leave.. 374 00:18:57,834 --> 00:19:00,934 You owe it to yourself to finish the game.. 375 00:19:00,968 --> 00:19:02,434 Because if I don't, 376 00:19:02,467 --> 00:19:05,601 I'll be quitting like I did in high school, right?. 377 00:19:05,634 --> 00:19:08,767 No, because I don't want to hear you whining, 378 00:19:08,801 --> 00:19:11,400 "if only I had taken that last at-bat.. 379 00:19:11,434 --> 00:19:12,767 Wah-hah, boo-hoo.". 380 00:19:12,801 --> 00:19:16,000 That's less inspiring.. 381 00:19:16,033 --> 00:19:18,033 All you wanted was one hit, right?. 382 00:19:18,067 --> 00:19:20,601 Yeah.. 383 00:19:20,634 --> 00:19:22,200 So go do it.. 384 00:19:27,767 --> 00:19:29,434 You want it in the thigh or the chest?. 385 00:20:13,467 --> 00:20:14,734 Safe!. 386 00:20:16,033 --> 00:20:17,334 Ha ha! Yes!. 387 00:20:17,367 --> 00:20:18,801 Ha ha ha ha!. 388 00:20:18,834 --> 00:20:21,601 You're outta there! Game over!. 389 00:20:28,234 --> 00:20:32,033 Congratulations.. 390 00:20:32,067 --> 00:20:33,601 You got your hit.. 391 00:20:33,634 --> 00:20:35,434 Yeah. I guess I did.. 392 00:20:35,467 --> 00:20:36,968 Are you ready to go?. 393 00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:39,667 No, you guys go ahead. I'm gonna grab my gear.. 394 00:20:47,834 --> 00:20:49,968 Number 79.... 395 00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:52,667 Third baseman... 396 00:20:52,701 --> 00:20:55,501 Charlie Crawford.. 397 00:21:04,601 --> 00:21:08,100 So Charlie got to live out his fantasy.. 398 00:21:08,133 --> 00:21:10,033 Hey, you think dogs have fantasies? 399 00:21:10,067 --> 00:21:11,067 I don't know.. 400 00:21:11,100 --> 00:21:12,934 Do you have a fantasy, boy?. 401 00:21:12,968 --> 00:21:14,501 Do you have a fantasy?. 402 00:21:14,534 --> 00:21:16,133 Oh, that's a good boy.. 403 00:21:16,167 --> 00:21:18,767 You're just the best boy, aren't you?. 404 00:21:18,801 --> 00:21:21,067 Who is the most handsome dog in the entire world?. 405 00:21:21,100 --> 00:21:23,234 Who is he? Is that you?. 406 00:21:23,267 --> 00:21:25,434 Is that you, my little baby?. 407 00:21:25,467 --> 00:21:29,601 Oh, yes, you are my little baby.. 408 00:21:29,634 --> 00:21:32,100 Sit, ubu, sit. Good dog. 30242

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